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rayroseu · 6 months

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Azul was freaking SCARY during this part Ngl lmAO imagine blasting this guy with your most powerful spell and he starts laughing like a maniac with hollow eyes and SHOTS you unexpectedly with an even more POWERFUL spell😂😂😂

I would love more insane Azul ✨✨✨✨ being businessman prim doesnt suit him as much as this lol

Also I FELT this part lol its really nice seeing Rollo get beaten up after his nonsense 💥💥👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 Go get him board game club‼️‼️

I love the buildup towards this part. Malleus was written as if he was intimated by Rollo during the fight, but then his mask of being "weak" falls off and its actually revealed that he is not intimidated by Rollo at all, in fact the way this scene's vibes gives off??? He was looking down at him, with his 'plans' and his stupid delusion about antagonizing him.

I love when TWST reminds us that Malleus is a king. ✨✨

He hides off this personality that he truly believes he's too superior than anything, that he's undefeatable.

Not gonna lie y'all, I think Malleus won't be defeated by the flowers, he emphasized this from the start, that he's fighting Rollo because the flowers will be problematic for Briar Valley, but not him yk.

Plus, this is Meleanor's kid😂 Mother didn't birth a weak dragon‼️

I think this part also mirrors in Book 7 where the Silver Owls was convinced they caught Meleanor but she just laughed at them and declared that they'll decimate every human in her sight for being insulting as to think they can ravage her land and defeat her lol.

Also the fact that Henry basically narrates her as if she's the villain of humanity by calling her a witch... It parallels to Rollo seeing Malleus (even though he didn't do anything) as the root of all evil yk.

Also possible theory for the Kind Bellringer and the Just Judge??? We all know that their story is written more peaceful here than the Disney movie.

But one thing that's strange is that No one knows what the Bellringer was fighting for even if he's considered a hero of Fleur City-- at the same time, we don't know how Rollo even got the flowers (aside from studying ancient flora)--- Basically, Fleur City lore has many plotholes and no one knows what it is and why is that-- Its like Briar Valley history...

We know the crimson flowers are a reference to the scene where Quasimodo released lava around the Notre Dame to prevent Frollo from entering....

What if in Fleur City as well,,,, Quasimodo (as the Kind Bellringer here) rebelled as well against the Just Judge (Frollo) as well?? But the Just Judge is instead credited as "the saviour of Fleur City" because the evidence of the Bellringer acrually being the saviour is burned up or smth, thats why Fleur City's history has many gaps in them...

Also the Just Judge being the actual villain in the history but remembered as a hero now because of misinformation.... It matches Rollo's punishment that he'll forever be complimented by the actions he didn't do, and its up to his guilt whether he can stand living as a fraud who actually harmed the same people thats highly regarding him rn.

LMFAO GRIM????? DONT BULLY GRANPA TREIN??? YOU SILLY 😭😭😭😭 I wanna hug Grim he's so cute in this event.... My unruly son 💖💓💖💓🥹

The gargoyles are so cool🥹🥹🥹💖💓💖 How does Malleus differentiate them... 💥

Also this makes me wonder.... Why Briar Valley doesn't have talking gargoyles??? Isn't Briar Valley a magical nation??? Talking non living things should be a norm for them lol

but Malleus feels like its his first time ever with a talking gargoyle lol

ISNWIHBDHIWHID HE REFERRED TO HIMSELF AS "MAL" .... CAN YOU BE MORE CUTER THAN YOU ALREADY ARE 😭😭✨✨🫶🏻✨🫶🏻💓💖💖💖💖

he really loves nicknames rather than "titles" because people who gives him nicknames isnt shackled by the expected decorum of meeting him-- therefore these people are not acting and they are sincere with talking with him, it helps with the connection and feeling like he belongs 🥹🥹💞💞💞

I COULDN'T RESIST COMPLIMENTING GRIM AAGHHH MY CUTE AND ADORABLE AND HANDSOME SON YOU ARE MOST PRECIOUS THE ADORABLE HERO OF FLOWER CITY 💓💞💖💓💞💖

I love how Grim ran the moment he heard that someone is doing a celebratory toss lol The goofy running sfx lol 😂😂

I love how teasing Silver and Sebek was here lol Threatening to toss Idia in the air omg.. He's traumatized already from walking the stairs lol The way Sebek and Silver can be unexpectedly playful... it feels so... "Lilia taught this to them didnt he..." 😂😂😂

WAAAAHHH YUU CENTER ATTENTION YAY YAY 💖💓💞💖💞💖💓 i love how he used his sultry smile here though lol .... He knows we waiting for his undivided attention yiiiee✨✨✨💞💞💞

Also i hate this translation part.... In the twst JP Malleus dialogue shows the specific lyrics of "Make a Wish" hes singing rn but in TWST EN IT DOWNGRADED TO JUST " *SINGING* "l

also on the twistune, twst JP shows the lyrics but on twst en, theres none.... I don't get why they arent translating it... This game is for people who dont understand Japanese?? So its natural youre going to translate everything for us non japanese to yk... Atleast understand without googling for translations???

YEAAA PHOTOGRAPHER YUU HERE THEY SHINE 📸📸📸📸📸😎😎😎😎 be proud your mages still have magic crowley lmfao 💥💥💥

Also i hit the image limit now... But i love the Cinderella reference from Trein's dialogue ✨✨✨ that Yuu taking pictures of the ball can make the other uninvited students more jealous lol

Its a reference to how Lady Tremaine plotted against Cinderella just for her to never attend the ball... ✨

I like this event ngl, but I feel like Rollo's story was kind of rushed ngll jdnfiind we never found out why he's so angry at Malleus, how did he even come to the conclusion that killing Malleus is killing magic, bruh...🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ Malleus is not even the top 1 strongest mage??? 😂😂

Also i feel like this event was made for Idia instead, it felt like Idia was the main character imo...

I just feel like the event couldve given their dynamic more light because its so intriguing that they went to similar trauma but have different outcomes...

In a way Rollo is what Idia wouldve become if he continued tormenting himself for Ortho's death alone...

He said to Rollo that "is removing magic what your brother wouldve wish?" I think thats very telling that even if its tragic that Robot Ortho's creation was fuelled by Idia's grief and defiance that Ortho is forever gone, it was suitable for Idia's pain to remind himself that Ortho wouldve wished he goes on... as is very telling of Book 6's ending about Ortho's refusal on Idia's suicide by going with him on the Underworld...

also because I think Rollo would need some person like Idia whos blunt for regular reality checks just so he wouldn't blinded by his delusion again and ransack the world 😭😭

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aftonsparv-bugzz · 19 days

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:33 < rant

:33 < being a system is just.... so scary. i constantly have mental breakdowns, idont permit "myself" to look at "me" in the mirror, idont know who "i"am because iam not me. its a group of people. it feels so insane, like im not real. people call me by my name in which idont realise iam me or at least supposed to be. ihave so much confusion in life, so much amnesia and unawareness, its crazy. i just want to be freed and alone. we dont particularly like each other either. icant stare at myself normally. i seem to have to have a mental breakdown. ifeel so out of place. so abnormal. the others themselves get scared. we barely know who we are. am i the host ? really ?? did the actual host go dormant years ago ?? i question this daily because it dosent seem like im the actual me more like a fake version, or a figment of the original. a place holder. yea sure, icall myself the original, but am i really ?? maybe buzy knows, but then again buzy also is a little.... much. shes trying to.... well idont really wanna say it so yea. she wouldnt exactly be of much help. maybe all the others named s ? imeannnn theyre kinda the same as buzy. and its not exactly like we talk to eachother. imean yea, our headspace is super boring, but we kinda enjoy being alone and dont talk to eachother so iguess. thats. alright. idont know im probably just gonna stop this

#surprisingly not homestuck #not tagging #personal rant #sorry for the rant #rant cw #rant tw #tw rant #cw rant #nepeta sp33ks !! :3 #nepeta rantz !! ^_^#mew is ranting :oP

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thekrows-nest · 9 months

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normally i dont have my OCs be yanderes when I set them up with someone else's yan OC but i like the idea of a yandere primmy with krow <3<3<3 some more naughty stuff will come eventually

General Things:

Prim 100% has her hands on Krow all the time she's so insatiable 😭 (Ofc she stops whenever Krow asks- consent is sexy :lipbite:) I know she'd love to press long and drawn out smooches on Krow's lips only to nip his lip as she pulls away. Prim adores holding his hand all the time or wrapping her arms around his neck from behind. She peppers kisses all over krow's hands calling them pretty and gushes about how talented they are as an artist. Constantly compliments him on anything and everything. Prim would frame anything that Krow gifts her 🥰 She'd put little braids in his hair, transferring some of her hair clips onto him.

Prim's huge on gift-giving. I haven't specified it too much i think??- but Primmy’s not the type to just buy expensive gifts because they're expensive. (She haaates most of the popular luxury brands) She honestly puts the effort to buy gifts that are meaningful to her darling. I'd say Prim would avidly watch Krow paint/sculpt and take note of any paint/material he runs low on. As much as she would love for krow to let her spoil them with her money she understands that it can be overwhelming so she tries to be careful about it. She buys him groceries often because he probably cooks all the time for her since she cant cook for shit 😭

Yanyan things:

I don't think there's very many things that Krow would do to make her act rashly 🤔 I think they pair so well that its just unlikely jdhdbdbd

But i still wanna talk about kidnapping so lets pretend Primmy lost a few (more) screws

Krow would wake up in a plush bed, leg chained to the wall, enough slack to move around the room. Prim sits at the foot of the bed, perking up as she spots him awake. "Birdie! Good morning, love." She coos, leaping over and tightly hugging him. A sweet strawberry scent fills his senses. She tightly grips his face, looking at him with absolute adoration. "I know this seems a little scary but it's for the best. I can't have you getting away from me." She nuzzles him close, sharp nail nicking his cheek as she moves. She presses a kiss over the cut and licks the small bead of blood. Krow lifts a hand to feel his neck, a collar customized to suit him sit snugly on him. "Oh I'm so happy I have you here with me, birdie. We'll be together forever and ever." She lets out an airy giggle, lacing their fingers together.

Okay NOW I think I have the spoons to actually respond to this ndfgbld

Krow is totally fine with all the physical affection Prim wants to give him (the only time he'd really ask her to stop is when he is trying to work on some art, ESPECIALLY if it's something where he could accidentally nick her like if he was carving something). He'd definitely get a bit bashful over the compliments, but accept them in good stride. What affection she gives him, he returns in equal doses. Krow is like a mirror, reflecting the love and attention his Dove gives him in turn.

Small, meaningful gifts Krow can and does appreciate. Like I mentioned before, the more expensive and/or grand the thing, the more awkward he gets over it. Even if he KNOWS it is within Dove's price range, what makes him feel weird about it is that he cannot do the same in turn. Like, he can also gift small, cute stuff. But something impressive with a hefty price tag? Not at all. And he'll cook all the time for Prim. He enjoys it and food is something that makes him very happy. I hope Prim delights in different foods and cuisines like he does. You'll never get bored with Krow's cooking.

As for the yandere side of things hoo boy.

Like you said (and I think I did too), I highly doubt there's anything either one would do to make the other spiral into more crazy yandere acts. Prim I am sure wouldn't do anything to ignite Krow's jealousy (not to dangerous levels anyway) and I don't think Krow would do anything in turn.

But again, for the sake of the plot bunny, let's say he did.

Admittedly Krow is... torn?

On one hand, he is flattered that Prim loves him SO MUCH that she wishes to keep him forever and ever. He feels much the same! He'd love to stay forever! But also like... "Heheh, D-Dove, m-my Muse, y-you didn't have to g-go through s-such efforts. Y-you could have simply a-asked me to m-move in." And he was... never gonna get away from you?

And yet. And yet he thinks of his coworkers. Especially Luke and Jazzy. He loves the both of them too. He wants them in his life somehow. It is not like they replace Prim or are more important. Prim AND Luke with Jazzy are equally important! Krow knows he'll have to proceed with caution to convince Prim that he WILL be with them, forever and he isn't leaving them or anything. But he has some devotion to Luke and Jazzy too.

It's... a sticky situation for sure.

#krow asked and answered #krow in character #the krow's nest #dove prim #dove aviary

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borathae · 5 months

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chapter 15

Can’t you like it for me?” he says with big puppy eyes.

You look away.

“You’re being emotionally manipulative here.” shut up girl im loving u too much i cant

“You are playing with fire here, Bunny. Try not to burn yourself”, you grumble.

He chuckles and pecks your cheek.

“I like the burn”, he rasps against the shell of your ear, turning to the front afterwards.

SHUT UP IM CANT TAKE IT. try not to lose your shit challenge- mission failed successfully

He treated you so goddamn fucking well that sometimes you still felt the urge to punch him in the face and run away jk in the corner, i'll take that as a compliment

Lately the latter have become more and more. YAY

“Hey kiddo. How are you doing?” he says in a surprisingly deep voice for such a small frame. me with felix and taehyung

“for half a million bucks I expect to have the painter constantly working on it in a metal cage in the middle of my living room or something.” - ........ - a few bystanders had heard you and were now looking at you with weird eyes. SHUT UP THATS SOO ME except my voice would be low and nobody would hear but could be loud too cuz universe makes it louder at times when u dont want anyone to hear shit

although he was stressed and exhausted he never once smelled of alcohol. AHHHH IM SO PROUD OF HIM *gives a big ass hug and a smooch

WHY DOES NERO'S SHOULDERS LOOK FAMILIAR TO HER AND WHY DOES SHE LOOK FAMILIAR TO HIM AHHH STOP I HATE IT THIS CHAPTER IS A ROLLERCOASTER

again a fluffy moment after the tense thank you, her threatening to buy green and purple pillows PLZ that sounds like me trying to threaten my parents by telling them im gonna marry a cat crazy dude

“I’m not asking for it. I am very much anti punishment uwu i love this stupid noodle

He swallows heavily, “a-are we going to make out now?” he asks, grasping for your hips. he is such a cute and horny noodle pls and no u are about to cringe for the rest of your office time

FUCK GET YOURSELF A MAN WHO CAN FIGHT FOR YOU IMMEDIATELY

“don’t say that what the hell my cock twitched.”

“I am not going to apologize because I am way too turned on to care.”

He looks from side to side with the tip of his nose rosy.

“What’s with the sudden horniness oh my god?”

“It’s just that I never really saw you work before and it’s kinda doing things to me.” SAME HERE IM FEELING IM WATCHING SOME HOT CEO FROM KDRAMA BUT EVEN BETTER AAAAH

It makes his ass cheeks tense up and forces a quiet whimper from between his lips. SHUT UP SHUT UP HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MOVE ON FROM THIS MOVE ON WITH MY DAILY LIFE????? VANESSA HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITAUTIONS ??

I REPEAT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE LAUGH LOVE IN THESE SITUATIONS??? JIWOO SOUNDS SIERIOUS OH SHIT NOW SHE KNOWS AAAH

WHY IS SHE CONNECTING THE DOTS SOMETIMES CHARACTERS SHOULD BE DUMB PLEASEEEE also why is there a group of people surrounding kook??? 👀

the whole thing was soo tense i sweated through my shirt now im a stinky kid -_- BUT WE LOVED IT the emotions was captured soo well and he was supportive yet very unsupportive if your brain's going haywire with an anxiety/panic attack

Twirling him threw him straight into subspace. *insert meme i hope i dont fall, her: twirls him kook : oh no mommy

the mom is sweet AND I CANT STAND THE DAD UGHHH

i prayed for her to not go to the mirror AND SHE DID NOO its really the worst thing to do during a panic attack :(

that was soo scary even i felt the uncontrollable demons while reading and thanks it ended on a good note and it was cute.

anyways i wish her a great day next morning(tho the story has ended) cuz them muscles be hurting like a bitch oof

Me reading through all your reactions:

hahahahha I love how you went on an emotional rollercoaster with this chapter jfdjsf also you quoting so many parts is my weakness hehehe thank you so much for doing that

BROORORORO THE TWIRLING PART WAS THE ONE OF THE FIRST TIMES I WENT "oh fuck i have a mommy kink" LIKE IDK IF YOU GUYS KNOW BUT AAOL WAS MY MOMMY KINK AWAKENING FADSFAHH

#asks: aaol #asks #minusback #tw: long post

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strawbszz · 2 years

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i just made up a little fluff fanfic-

the 2 main characters names are Frank Smith (not frank iero- this has nothing to do with mcr i just made this up in my head) and Gia Jones. 2 lovers who met in Boston in school in 10th grade. (also if it has some misspelling i’m dyslexic so it will have some problems-) (ALSO THE TIMELINE IS 2001-2005 so characters will use flip phones, and iPods not iPhones and that stuff) (also i did fail english so thats why sometimes it may not make sense-)

Genre: Romance/fluff (fluff definition if you dont know: Fluff is often used in fandom to characterize any pleasant, feel-good work. It is sometimes described as the opposite of angst. Fluff may lack plot; however, unlike a PWP the focus is not sex, but displays of affection between two or more characters, whether their relationship is romantic or not.)

word count: 3,282

Chapter count: 3

Frank was laying on his bed staring at the ceiling. doing nothing. his phone goes off. he grabs his phone to see that Gia texted him. he sits up and checks the text.

“hey Frank! good morning. what you up to?” “nothing. just laying down trying to wake up.”

Frank is half awake, extremely tired from staying up all night.

“i stayed up all night watching a movie.” “of course you did you night owl. what were you watching??” “i was just rewatching the IT movie because i got bored.” “i never knew you were such a horror movie fan??” “yeah i especially like the IT movies, they are scary but funny at the same time!” “i have to go now, i got work! bye Frankie!!” “lol bye G.”

Frank gets up and goes downstairs to make some coffee. he sees his roommate Toby chilling on the couch watching tv.

“hey mornin’ Frank! glad to see you’re awake!” Toby chuckles. “well good morning to you too, Toby.” Frank sighs. Frank sits next to Toby with a steaming cup of coffee.

“what we watching today, Toby..?” “just some football.” “ah..” Frank says unamused.

Frank spills some coffee on his shirt “crap- DANG IT I WANTED TO WEAR THIS SHIRT!!” Toby laughs “SHUSH TOBY!!!”

Frank goes up to his room and changes his shirt to a reddish blueish black stripe sweater. “really- some coffee got on my jeans..” he says unamused. Frank grabs some jeans with a basic black belt.

Frank thinks to himself while staring at himself in the mirror “i wonder how Gia is doing..??”

he grabs his flip phone. you hear the rattling from his charm that Gia got him around a year and a half ago. he starts to text her.

“hey Gia! you still at work?” “hey Frank! no i’m on my lunch break! what are you doing?”

“i’m just chilling in my room i had to change my outfit because i spilt coffee on it..” “haha of course you did. i remember you did that in class back in 11th grade!” don’t remind me of that Gia.”

“your silly. oh! my lunch break is over! i have to go! bye Frankie!!!” “bye Gia!”

i love Gia so much. she makes my day so much better when i get to chat with her. i do miss her.

i kinda don’t remember how she looks now. she told me a week ago that she dyed her hair black! i also dyed my hair black with red tips!

someone knocks on Franks door. “who is it?” “its just me, hey do you want to get some lunch?? i know you’ve been feeling down but we should go down to that coffee shop and get some food there!”

“eh.. i’m not feeling that hungry..” “you sure?? you haven’t eaten any food today, you only drank half of your coffee.”

“i just need to lay down for like 5 minutes.” “okay! Well meet me downstairs when you’re ready!” “okay..”

he just lays there scrambling in thoughts.

“what if Gia does not love me anymore.. what if she does not want to see me anymore.. maybe thats why she moved away from Boston to Jersey! wait no no.. am i a bad friend...?”

a knock comes from Frank’s door. “Frank!! come on! its been 10 minutes!! we need to go eat!!!!” Frank sighs “fine, we can go now.” “sweet!”

Frank grabs his black dirty converse and puts them on. he grabs his dark green zip up hoodie and goes downstairs.

“hey, Toby you probably will need a jacket or hoodie it’s pretty cold outside.” “oh, right.. thanks Frank!”

Frank and Toby walk outside, Frank looks at the orangey yellowish red leaves falling from the trees. Stepping on the gravel has a nice sound to Frankie. Frank’s favorite seasons is fall and winter, he hates hot weather because it makes him sweaty and gross feeling and he does not have cool clothes for hot weathers.

They get in the car and drive to the coffee shop. “ooh!! i can smell the coffee from here Toby!!!” Frank says in a excited voice. “okay okay.. calm down Frank.” Toby laughs.

“Hi! what can i get you two??” “hi ma’am, i’ll get a BLT and a diet coke.” “okay! and what would you like sir?” “psst!! Frank- the lady asked you what you want!!” Toby whispers to Frank. “i-uhm.. i- i’ll get a croissant and a coffee!” “okay! your drinks will be on the way!” “thanks!”

Toby smiles at the nice lady. “Frank!! what was that?!” Toby Whispers to Frank. “sorry Toby, i didn’t hear her, i was listening to music on my iPod.” “well next time we order you HAVE to have your headphones out.” “fine fine..”

“when do you get to see Gia??” “i-uhm.. i don’t know yet..” “oh.. okay”

“heres your drinks and food! be careful sir this coffee is hot!” she smiles. “thanks ma’am!” they eat there food and drink there drinks.

time has passed and Frank got a text from Gia. Frank smiles in excitement.

“hey Frankie! guess what!” “what?” “i’m moving back to Boston!!” “REALLY?!” “yeah!! maybe we can meet somewhere for dinner to hangout?” “yeah!! i’ll text you where we should go! when are you moving down here??” “Tomorrow!” “oh nice!! i’ll see you then!! bye!” “bye Frankie!!”

Toby snaps his fingers at Frank. “hello! earth to Frankie!!!” “shit man- you scared me! i was just texting Gia!!” “of course you were. what were you chatting about??” Toby Smiles. “she’s moving back down to Boston tomorrow!!” “oh! sweet! i haven’t met her yet!” “yeah she’s really nice! i haven’t seen her in 2 years!! she said she dyed her hair black!” “oh cool, and i guess she hasn’t see your new hair??”

“yeah! uhm.. what time is it??” “10:36pm.” “well, i should get some sleep.” “yeah, same. goodnight Frank!” “night.”

Frank walks upstairs to his room. he opens his closet and changes into his pajamas. he grabs a dvd of harry potter and puts it in the dvd player and turns on the tv. Frank gets in his bed and presses play on the remote.

“o..kay.. time to watch some harry potter!” 1 hour and a half later Frank’s phone rings. its Gia!! he grabs his phone and clicks answer.

“h-hello??” “hey! Frankie! i just moved in and some of my furniture hasn’t came it yet- can i stay over at your house??” “u-uhhm sure.. sorry you just woke my up..” “sorry i woke you up” Gia giggles. “its okay my address is-” “okay! thanks I will be there in 20 minutes!!” “okay bye..!” “bye Frankie!!”

Frankie gets out of his bed in excitement and goes downstairs to the little door in the stairs and grabs a deflated air mattress and air pump. he goes upstairs and Toby opens his door to see Frank going to his room.

“h-huh..? w-what are you doing Frank..??” Toby says half awake. “Gia just moved in and she needed some where to sleep because her furniture has not came in yet!” “oh- uhh.. okay.. i’m going back to bed.. night Frank.” “goodnight!”

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CHAPTER 2!!!! yes i am doing chapters! i thought this was gonna be a one shot but i’m doing chapters! idk how many yet but this is chapter 2!!

Gia’s pov: she opens the door to her house “woah! it’s spacious in here!!” she sets her luggage down and turns on the lights. “right.. the moving truck is coming in 2 days..”

she grabs her flip phone and calls Frank. “h-hello??” “hey! Frankie! i just moved in and some of my furniture hasn’t came it yet- can i stay over at your house??” “u-uhhm sure.. sorry you just woke my up..” “sorry i woke you up” Gia giggles. “its okay my address is-” “okay! thanks I will be there in 20 minutes!!” “okay bye..!” “bye Frankie!!”

she gets in her car and drives to Frank’s house and gets out of her car.

she walks up to his house and rings the door bell. Frank answers in excitement “Hi Gia!!!” Frankie has a big smile. “hey Frank!!!” they share a hug. Gia can feel that Frank is jittery from 2 cups of coffee that day. “aw! i missed you!” “same here!!!” she looks at Frank’s black hair with red tips. “ooh!! you dyed your hair!!” “same with you!! i love yours!” “thanks!!” “you’re still short like i remember!” she giggles. “and you’re still tall.. maybe a little bit taller by an inch..” (there height difference is Gia’s 5′7 and Frank’s 5′5 btw) “well come in Gia!” Gia walks in and sees the living room. “ooh! nice house!” Frank grabs her by the hand and runs upstairs to his room. “let me show you were your gonna be staying!!” “i-uhh- okay!!” Gia’s caught off guard. “well it is my room because my roommate Toby is next door in that other room but theres your air mattress!!” “nice!” Gia looks around. “yeah.. i got dvds for movies, cds for music, books. and yeah!” “oh sweet! well i really tired..” “okay, want an extra blanket?” “oh sure!” “okay well goodnight!” Frank smiles. “night Frankie”

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Frank’s pov: i wake up to see Gia laying there. So peaceful. So pretty. I just want to kiss her right now. RIGHT! time to get up! Frank hops out of bed trying not to step on Gia and walks downstairs and brews some coffee for him and Gia. Toby walks downstairs to see Frank making some coffee.

“uhh.. morning Frank.” Frank gets spooked a little bit. “JEEZ TOBY!! DON’T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!!” Toby giggles. “sorry- hey uh- who’s that girl sleeping in you’re room on an air mattress..?” “oh! thats Gia! sorry that i could not introduce her to you- she came here at like 2am-” “ah, okay.”

Gia comes downstairs wearing not many clothes only like a loose t shirt, and nike shorts. Her makeup was smudged. She looked so cute.

“h-hey! morning G!” Frank smiles and goes over to her and hugs her. “h-hello to you too clingy..” Gia giggles and hugs Frank back. “you doing okay, G?” “y-yeah..! I smell coffee!” Gia smirks at Frank. Frank sighs. “kay, i’ll get you a cup of coffee.” Frank grabs a mug and fills it with some hot coffee. “here you are m’lady.” Frank giggles while handing her the mug of coffee. “thanks you dork” Gia smirks at Frank. Frank grabs himself a mug and fills it with coffee and sits next to Gia.

“so.. what do you wanna do today??” Frank puts his arm slightly around Gia. “hmm.. lets go get lunch later! you pick the place!” “okay!” Frank takes his arm away from her shoulder. he puts his hands in his lap and sits there in silence. “you okay, Frankie..? Got something on your mind..?” “u-uhmm..i know that we haven’t seen each other and i just wanted to ask if its okay if i can..kiss you..?” “i-uhhm.. sure! i-i mean its okay you can if you want. i don’t mind!” “u-uhhmm... okay..!” they both share a soft kiss. “y-you’re really pretty..” “shh.. dork” Gia smiles at frank wrapping her arm around his shoulder and cuddling him. “you’re warm..” Gia smiles as a response. “i love you Frankie..! you’re so sweet.” Gia kisses Frank on the head.

they just chill on the couch with their half cold coffees and watching boring tv.

Toby sighs. “i’m going to work you two. i’ll be back at 7:30pm.” “kay.. bye!”

Frank fell asleep on Gia. Gia grabs from her pocket her iPod and puts her headphones in and turns on some music. Gia checks the time on her flip phone. its 11:23pm.

Gia rubs Frank’s shoulder. “hey.. wake up sleepy head..” Frank wakes up. he looks very soft and cute. “h-huh.. hey..” “we should get going to lunch! i’ll let you wake up while i get dressed. you need to get dressed too.” “right..! hold on.. it will take me a minute to get up..” “okay! i’ll be upstairs!” “kay..!”

Gia runs upstairs to get ready. Frank sits there for a while to wake up and rubs his eyes and gets up. he walks upstairs. he sees Gia in the bathroom with the door open putting on makeup.

Frank goes behind Gia and raps his arms around her waist to hug her.

“hey my little Cuddle Bug.” Gia smiles and puts her hand on his hands. “i love you...!” “love you too Love Muffin.” Frank has always loved Gia’s little nicknames she gives him. it makes Frank feel safe and happy. “kay.. i gotta get in some real clothes!” “okay!” Gia giggles.

Frank walks to his room and grabs some baggy cargo pants, a shirt with flowers, and a black hoodie. he grabs his hight-top converse and puts them on.

Gia walks into the doorway. “hey! how do i look?” Gia is wearing black skinny jeans, a nirvana shirt, and a dark green zip-up with black high-top converse. “you look good! ready to go??” “mhm.” “kay! lets go!” Frank smiles.

they go outside to the car and get in and drive to the restaurant. they arrive to the local coffee shop.

“ooh! this place looks nice!” Gia smiles. “yeah! me and Toby go here sometimes.”

they go inside and sit down.

“so hows your day Love..?” Gia grabs his hands to hold hands on the table. “u-uhhmm..” Frank is very flustered right now. “i-it’s good..!” “thats good!” Gia smiles at Frank. Frank is beat red right now. “you’re so cute when you’re flustered.” Gia rubs his hand with her thumb. “i love you Frankie..” “i love you too..!”

Gia takes her hands away from his when she sees the waitress coming their way.

“hello! what can i get you two??” “uh.. i’ll get a grilled cheese with a coke..!” “okay! and what can i get you ma’am??” “i’ll get the BLT, with a water.” “okay! your food and drinks will be here soon!”

Frank and Gia put there feet on each other and just sit there in silence for a second. “wanna go cuddle when we go home Love??” “mhm..!”

they get there food and drinks and eat and then they pay. they are walking to the car while holding hands.

“you’re my favorite person.” “really...?” Frank sounded kinda surprised. “mhm!”

they drive home and go upstairs to go lay down. Gia sits on the bed and lays down. them Frank lays on her and they cuddle for a while.

Frank falls asleep. Gia gets up and puts the covers over Frank’s small thin body.

she walks downstairs and grabs a soda and walks upstairs to lay back down.

she sees Frank laying there sobbing a little bit.

“baby! are you okay??” Gia grabs Frank and cuddles him on the floor. Frank just lays there sobbing a lot now and can’t even get a word out. “baby.. please tell me what happened!..” Frank can’t really get a word out but mumbles “m-my..”

~~~~~~~~TRIGGER WARNING: DE@TH~~~~~~~~~

(Chapter 3)

“m-my dad called me a-and said.. m-my mom is.. dead..” Gia hugs him tightly and tears up a little. “oh my god.. baby.. i’m so sorry..!” “i-it’s not you’re fault, G..” they cuddle there for a sec. “here.. let me go make you some tea, baby..” “mhm..”

Frank sits there in disbelief that his mother is gone now.. he gets up to go to the bathroom and wipes his tears up with a tissue. Gia comes upstairs with some hot tea and sits it on Frank’s nightstand. she goes to hug Frankie from behind.

“i made your tea, Love.” “thank you Gia..” Gia kisses his shoulder and goes to sit down on his bed. Frank goes and grabs his tea and sips it.

“mmm..! it’s good..!” Gia smiles at Frank.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3 months later ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(month: may)

they both go visit Frank’s mother’s grave with flowers in hand. Frank just stares at his mother’s grave for a moment holding back the tears and sits the flowers in front of his mother’s grave and walks over to Gia and they go to the car.

they just drive home in silence.

Frank grabs Gia’s iPod from her grove box and turns on some music that you can hear from the headphones. Gia hears the faint sound from the iPod of some nirvana. Gia puts her hand on Frank’s leg and rubs it for a sec before Frank looks at her.

“what do you want?” Frank sound Irritated at Gia. “nothing! just loving on you.”

Frank moves his leg and Gia’s hand falls to the seat. Frank holding back the tears and pressing himself against the car door not wanting to talk with Gia at the moment.

“d-did i do something wrong..?” Gia sounds worried. Frank just stays silent for the rest of the drive home.

they get home and Frank gets out of the car immediately and slams the car door shut and stomps into the house while slamming doors.

Toby looks worried. “y-you okay Frank?-” Frank cuts off Toby. “NOT NOW TOBY!” he yells. Frank stomps upstairs and slams the door. he lays in bed sobbing hard.

Gia walks in the house with a concerned look on her face. “i-is Frank okay, G..?” “i don’t know right now.. i think he’s made at me..” “oh..” Toby mumbles.

Gia goes upstairs and knocks on the door. “Frank? you okay..??” she tries to open the door but it’s locked. “Frank please open the door..” Gia tears up and gets really worried about Frank.

she starts knocking really hard on the door. “FRANK! OPEN THIS DOOR!!!” she hears Frank sobbing on the other side of the door. “p-please don’t h-hurt me..”

Gia unlocks the door and busts in to see Frank bawling on the floor. “Frankie!” Gia grabs Frank and hugs his tightly. “did i do something wrong..?” “i-i don’t know..” “I’m sorry if I did..” “mm..” Frank snuggles up to Gia and lays there for a bit while they listen to some music.

Frank is really tired from that crazy day and is still shaking like a child that had coffee for the first time.

“Here.. let’s go to bed Hun..” “mhm..” Gia lays Frank in bed and she gets in bed with him and they fall asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Frank wakes up to Gia half way on him being a big spoon. Frank can’t really get up and get coffee or grab his iPod.

“Gia.. can you get off my me..” “mmhhhmm..”

Gia won’t budge. She’s half awake. She has her arm draped over Frank and her leg over his where he is pinned down to the bed.

“Gia.. please get off..” “mmmhhhhmn..” “I need to make coffee babe..” “fineee..”

She gets off of Frank and lays on her back sweating from all the blankets.

Frank puts on some sweat pants so Toby does not see him in his underwear, and walks downstairs.

“Morning Frank.” “Hey Toby.”

Frank is brewing some coffee for him and Gia.

“How’s you and your girl? She gonna live here now or something?” “I.. don’t know yet..” “well if she does she gotta pay rent too.” “I’ll make sure if she does live here.. hey and.. remember to keep it down next time..” “I- uhh- okay.. sorry.”

Frank was embarrassed from what Toby said to him.

Frank grabs 2 mugs and fills them up and brings them upstairs.

“Hey.. I made us coffee if you wanna wake up and not lay there.” “Mmhhhmh.. okay..”

Gia turns over to grab her coffee cup and sits up. She takes a sip from her coffee.

“Mmm.. thanks..” “and uh.. Toby said to keep you it down next time..”

Frank’s face is red from embarrassment.

“O-oh.. uh okay..” “yeah..”

They sit there in silence for a minute.

“Hey.. I’m sorry if that was embarrassing or anything like that!” “No no, your fine!!” “Okay..”

“Hey! Wanna go on a picnic by that lake?” “Sure! I’d love too Frank!” “Okay!”

They get up and grab clothes and go in separate rooms (bathroom and bedroom) and get dressed.

They go downstairs together.

“Hey Toby! We are gonna be gone for a while!” “Kay bye you two!”

They walk to the coffee shop and order to-go sandwiches and go to the lake.

“Okay! We are here!” “Ooo! It looks pretty here!!” “Yep! Here, let’s eat our sandwiches!”

They sit down on the slightly damp grass and eat there sandwiches.

“I love you, Frank!” “Love you too, Gia.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OMGG YESS IM FINISHED WITH IT YAY!! I HOPE YOU LIKED IT :D

#fluff #cute #love story #fanfic #fanficion #main character #nice #IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MCR #DONT SAY IT LIKE MCR LMAOO #fluffy #TW death #tw depression #fanfics #my fanfics

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ceem902 · 2 years

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Finding New Life

So basically I’ve been thinking. Six to start is a pretty special place as zombies run, the walk and other related series and alternate worlds that have been released and shared with the world, that we take part in.

They become pet of us and part of our lives, but the people at six to start take it a couple steps further. They guide the plot development in a way that makes us think about our lives and the lives of others, and possibly get the tools to heal our own, in a variety of capacities.

I feel this app and the creators at six to start are unique, not only because all of their creations intersect and connect in way that are interesting and insightful but they don’t creat these amazing worlds and the lives of these characters according to the desires of its audiences. It really does say something in this stage of late capitalism and the fact it is a small business with a very dedicated fan base that have followed them since the beginning and there for them for the future, what ever comes our way.

The lives, adventures and interactions of these characters that we can either love or hate dearly, are not all rainbows and unicorns. They are complex, have past trauma, have toxic behaviours, make mistakes, grow, learn and change, as their world does. It really makes for a unique and hyper realIstic experience that is lightened up or dumbed down in exchange for a wider audience. This keeps the content quality up the world we play as runner 5, vibrant, almost as vibrant as the one we all live right now.

I can’t explain the effect that zombies run and other creations that six to start has made on my life as I grew and changed. I am from the bottom of my heart eternally and ever gratefully for helping out when I needed it the most and also helping me enjoy when I had my good days too. With Easter eggs and secrets lore galore, this style of content really keeps my brain busy, as I have severe anxiety. DONT CHANGE FOR ANYWONE. I understand there are people with mental health concerns that want a lighter story but that doesn’t help anyone. We all have to face things are scary, the reflect the parts of us that we don’t like or what people did to us. Healing comes when we face those things and asking for safe help when we need it. It doesn’t mean that we can’t accommodate their request, we can put in alternate stories and side adventures (which you’ve done).

The next part of this letter comes from my own personal point of view from Runner five, in the main zombies run universe. My perspective has changed over the years as I have changed, healed and grown myself. But recent revelation can be seen with our best friend Peter, how we relate to him and our shared connections to the world and other characters.

Runner five and Peter Lynne, are very mush foil characters of each other. They are the same in many ways. That’s why we get along so well. And also people that we associate with are mirrors of ourselves, the similarities and differences between various characters can be seen.

Peter Lynne and Runner five have been together as coworkers, peers and true friends almost since the beginning. But their friendship has grown deeper and stronger with time. However, there are several toxic aspects to their relationship. Fives does truly platonically and possibly romantically love Peter, the way he is. They will always come from him, just like Peter will always come for five. But over the years Runner five has been through a tremendous amount of trauma and retraumatization of previous trauma in a very short amount of time. As runner five, has grown away and others previously very close character connections in the zombies run universe either fall apart, grow apart or cease to exist altogether, they grow more attached to the what seems like the only person that will always have their back.

This is sad because if you look more closely, runner 5 is a vivid, complex and amazing character in themselves. They aren’t just a placeholder as some would think. (Also who separation is important and we are getting more of that). Runner 5 is a person worthy of love, respect, safety and growth just for existing. Although they were created for a purpose, they are just starting to and being forced to realize that they do indeed deserve those things, as a lot of things point to five not have a lot of self worth, or worthy of healthy, safe and growth oriented personal relationships, whether they be platonic, sexual or romantic.

Snapping out of an abuse mindset that continues a cycle, is not easy and it’s quite painful. But it’s like you just one second you just snap out of it and suddenly the reality of your entire life was quite different then you thought it was. That can be very scary and I should know. But after we’ve processed that stage to some degree, we hopefully have the guts to make steps for ourselves to break the cycle and make a much better, safe and healthier, growth oriented life for ourselves. If it’s one thing I’ve learned is that everything is circular, no mater what dimension, age or experience you have. We all have to go through it, giving new meaning to the universe experiencing itself.

After the pain goes down a bit, it will never really go away, but that’s the point it’s there for a reason and so are the wildflowers that grow around it making our lives worth living.

Pulling this altogether, we see five growing an unhealthy attachment to Peter just to have someone that cares about them, and will always make sure they are ok. That should be a given with multiple characters with five at this stage but it’s not. It’s not growth or healthy love, it’s survival and it’s not pretty.

I was and still am in a place where I hated Janine for hurting Peter over and over again. She was supposed to there for him and help them grow, in their romantic relationship. Thinking that five could do so much better and that if Janine was taken out of the way and Peter just realized how much better five would be for them or really anyone else that didn’t put a bomb in their chest and told them it was a necessary thing to do, just to take it out, maybe a month later for not a good enough reason, in my personal opinion.

But that’s the thing, you can’t control people no matter how good your intentions are, respecting their choices whether you agree with them or not, is respecting them as a sovereign person just like you, is real healthy love. If that leads them down a path that tears them apart or hurts other people, you need to stick to your own boundaries and reach out to help if you need it. But that’s the hardest part is realizing that person has changed or you’ve changed and things are going to be different from now on. Different does have to be bad but when people ie. me are always waiting for the other shoe to drop, your focused on what is familiar to you that you could lose rather what you could gain that is new and different.

This is where five is right now I think, they are so deprived of a healthy life from being apart the cycle of abuse their whole lives that they didn’t realize the damage it was doing until now. It can be overwhelmed have to deal with that fact and other ms while still trying to live, heal and save the world all simultaneously. You can’t heal in a survival situation and that’s why fives mental health has gotten progressively worse over the years, no matter how well they try to hide from the people they love or at least used to.

Eventually they’ll come to a realization that trying to control other peoples lives to fit the fantasy of a life they were given, instead of healing, letting go both of that fantasy and many connections that they once held close while engaged in that fantasy. To move on to a new, different, but safer a d healthier stage their lives. The people who are willing to grow with themselves and also reciprocally respect fives choices to choose to be different, grow and change, will stay and grow themselves to meet them. New and different doesn’t have to be bad but it will always be scary. But then again scary doesn’t alway been bad for you, that’s why we have higher thinking processes but trauma and complex trauma make it magnitudes more complex and complicated for both the individual and their support network.

Five LOVES Peter in more than one respect but they can also realize some aspects aren’t healthy and know that their authentic relationship to each other is more important than fantasy and control. If Peter loves them platonically but not romantically that’s ok. If we truly see, respect and value them as a person and as our best friend, we will love them in a way that is consensual and healthy for both five and Peter. Then Five will take a big gulp and take that first step forward into the unknown, towards bigger and better things for them and in turn for others they care about too.

Because here’s the thing what ever you do has a ripple effect through out the multiverse. You might think that we are too small to really have an effect on anything but that’s not true because we are the universe experiencing itself after all. All beings have the ability to cause harm and create life/growth in themselves and others. So that same cycles that have hurt you and also heal you. You create a chain reaction when you step out into the unknown, other start to notice snd have reactions of their own. Some will take those steps after you but that’s not the point of doing this or your responsibility. You do it for you because you are worth so much, in doing so creating new cycles :)

Thank you, Six to Start.

Cassandra Morschauser :)🕸🧿❤️🌹🕸❤️‍🩹

#zombies run #runner five #runner 5 #peter lynne #simon lauchlan #janine deluca #zr #zombies run!#evan deaubl #janine de luca #sam yao #archie jensen #incorrect zombies run quotes #incorrect zr quotes #five/peter #runners five #zombies run season 9 #six to start

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ssparksflyy · 3 months

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hihi!! my 18th birthday is coming up soon and no one’s really been getting excited with me, so I was kinda wondering if you’d be willing to do a Leo Valdez x fem! (Daughter of Poseidon, not that it really matters) Reader fic? just like, basically him hyping up her birthday and just being super excited for her?? i just need some good ol’ comfort from my childhood comfort character lol!! thank you so much, hon, and I hope you have an amazing day 😌😌

ask and thou shall receive ༉‧₊˚.

go shawty, it's your birthday ! ๋࣭ ⋆｡ °✩

pairing: leo valdez x fem!reader summary: leo washes away your fears of growing up with his excitement of a future together. warning(s): none! just fluff ♡ word count: 876 a/n: hihi! tysm for requesting ♡ i hope u enjoy this and it fits what u asked for :)) sorry this is kinda short :( school has been a pain lately and i havent had much motivation but i wanted to get this out so ♡ also hope u have / had such a great birthday! finally legal, babyyyyy!

the lake had always been your favorite part of camp.

to you, it was such a convenient place to be. the lake managed to comfort you through any emotion, like it moved with you. if you were feeling a little down, the water would be soft and slow, matching your mood. if you were there with friends or leo, the currents would pick up, mirroring your rush of happiness.

you found yourself looking out at this very lake, the waves coming in calmly, the sea breeze comfortably hitting your face. you heard his footsteps on the dock, but didn't turn around. you already knew who it was.

"hey water girl" leo said, plopping down next to you on the edge of the dock, letting his feet dangle off of it, but just barely graze the water.

"hi fire boy" you said, looking at him and giving him a soft smile.

he returned it, and lifted his left arm up. you leaned into him and allowed him to put his arm around your shoulder. you put your head on his shoulder, and he put his on top of your head. you two had done this so often, you didn't even need to say anything anymore. it just happened.

"whatcha thinkin' about, pretty girl?" leo asked softly.

you knew you didn't have to hide anything from leo. even if you did, you knew he'd manage to get it out of you. he'd continue asking you about what you were hiding, and would then try to guess it. you always gave in eventually, he just had that effect on you. you didn't like hiding anything from him anyway, it felt unnatural. so you told him the truth.

"im just a little scared for my birthday." you said, looking out into the ocean, noticing how the current was picking up. not in a happy way, in a way that mirrored your worries and quick heartbeat.

leo took his head off of your shoulder and looked down at you. "why?" he asked.

"growing up has always just been a little scary, i dont know." you say, pursing your lips and looking down at your feet, watching them lightly skid across the water.

it goes quiet for a second, the only sound being the waves crashing onto the shore. leo's the one to break the silence. "well you know what, i think you should be looking forward to your birthday."

you let out a dry chuckle and look up at him, "and why's that?"

"cause a little birdy told me that your super awesome boyfriend is throwing you a party, i think your invited, but im not sure. ill have to check with him. its gonna be so cool, like the whole camp is invited, except the jerks, so maybe you are invited. it's totally gonna be better than the stoll's new year's party."

oh gods you remembered that party. pollux managed to get ahold of mr. d's alcohol cabinet and lets just say everybody (over 16, because mentally, you were in cuba) woke up with a splitting headache.

"oh and! i heard he wanted to take you shopping and already got premission from chiron to do it? i dont know, the guys kind of like obsessed with you, it's sooo funny to watch."

and it was. leo was noticeably blushing, and his body was getting warmer. you couldn't help but laugh at him.

he continued to talk about the benefits of growing up, which really cheered you up. he talked about moving in together, having to work for long hours, and hating it but it being worth it when you came home and had dinner together, followed by falling asleep together. he talked about adopting a pet together, maybe a goldfish. he talked about growing old together and always being by each other's side.

the water's current remained strong, but this time it was a good thing. leo managed to pick up your spirits, he always could. you could tell he was enjoying it as well. these pictures he was painting were enough to leave you both smiling and slightly kicking your feet.

"so yea! really, you should be excited to grow up, and you should be excited for your birthday, maybe i wont shove your face into a cake" leo said, finishing the picture he painted of what your lives could look like in the future.

you couldn't help but laugh. it wasn't a mocking laugh, it was a genuinely happy one. the thought of leo planning out your future together was enough to make you want to actually jump for joy. now he was sharing it proudly, oh boy you were surprised your heart didn't run out of your chest.

"you still scared of growing up, mi amor?" leo asked, his smiling beaming.

"not anymore, thank you leo." you said, a grateful smile on your face.

during his talk, he had taken his arm off his shoulder and turned his body to face you, still remaining close. you did the same. now, you sat up and cupped his face. you connected your lips and leo happily kissed you back, his hands resting on your waist.

the kiss was long but sweet, like a promise to your long future together.

a/n pt.2 : hi again! hope u enjoyed thisss, i love me some leo fluff ♡ sorry i havent been posting much this week, again, school is a oain in the butt :( but! finally got this out so time to finish my other requests ♡ have a wonderful day / night !

peace from manhattan,

percy jackson

#percy jackson #percy jackson x reader #pjo #pjo x reader #heroes of olympus #heroes of olympus x reader #hoo x reader #leo valdez x reader #leo valdez x you #leo valdez #by bells ♡⋆ ࣪.

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moveslikejaggeria · 2 years

Text

i hope the porn bots that follow me enjoy my little self indulgent tirades

i deactivated my instagram accounts the same night i made my last post. i deleted the discord app. why, you might ask yourself, and the answer is just…selfishness i guess. i got tired of the opportunity of people reaching out to me and just, not, so i closed the door entirely. makes it easier that way.

originally i thought i was going to die so returning didnt matter but here i am now, two weeks(-ish) later, still alive. then i thought i’ll watch avatar, and then i’ll reopen the account. except life really isnt that kind.

one of my coworkers—my ultimate favorite—asked me if i had gotten a mole on my face tested. i was confused, because i monitor my moles pretty closely; theyre scary and skin cancer runs in my family. i went home and spent the rest of the day taking pictures and looking in the mirror and poking and prodding and ultimately i was scared. its in my hairline, so i couldnt see it too well. i knew it was there but since i was relying solely on the sense of touch, it didnt seem that bad. its huge. and dark. and also white in some places. not good signs.

i dont like moles. in fact, i hate them. i hate what they represent, how they scare me, and how i cant just pick em off. i had one removed for cosmetic reasons way way back (it returned prepre cancerous, so nothing to worry about, but…not Great) but of course theyve returned with a vengeance and completely covered my body. luckily i got in with a dermatologist so theyll take a look at it and maybe take some of it for testing and hopefully they’ll look at the rest of my body and then look me in the eyes and say “you have nothing to worry about. you are healthy” but like that’ll help calm any nerves.

speaking of cancer, my mom has been updating me on my grandfather since she casually announced he has prostate cancer. i know different people deal with these things in different ways but it just feels so jarring to go from “how are you” to “oh just by the way, theyre testing to see if the cancer spread to his bones” or “we’re getting the whole family together next week bc we dont know if we’ll ever get to truly be together ever again so you should request off work on those days”. im worried about him. im (selfishly worried ~i~ have cancer)

so i delayed my return to social media even though i finished avatar bc i just dont know if i can go out on internet public and pretend that everything is okay. nothing has been okay for three years. im dealing with financial independence from my parents, my rapidly declining health, the loneliness of being away from my friends at school, and crushing mental illness. my mom keeps saying she did it—everyone had to go through this at some point: multiple minimum wage jobs and the stress of school, but she (and a lot of others) didnt have to deal with eating disorders. with a body that doesn’t cooperate. stress excema, stress vomiting, AND stress headaches/migraines.

have i talked about how much monkey pox scares me? im constantly itchy (dry skin) and my brain goes: you have monkey pox. you have it. every pimple is dissected and pinched until im like “okay. fine”. ive stopped wearing my mask at work and honestly its made me give up on covid. props to me for holding out for two plus years, but i cant do it anymore. not when absolutely no one cares. theres a new disease in town, covid, move out the way.

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stargazer-balladeer · 3 years

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Them reacting to walking in on their s/o self-harming [Genshin Impact]

Characters Included: Diluc Ragnvindr & Childe

Notes: i cried while making this- 😢 sorry if some makes no sense- hshsh- hope ya’ll like this.

Reader’s Gender: Neutral

Warning: trigger warning for self-harm and depressing stuff.

“... [Y/N]..?”

he honestly doesn’t know what he’ll do, whether or not to comfort you. Seeing you pressing a blade on your wrist, right where your vein is made Diluc freeze. His eyes were wide and blank, staring at the sight of blood pouring out of the freshly-made cuts on your arm and on the pristine white floor. How was he supposed to react to that?

When he finally caught up with his mind, his first instinct is to remove the blade in your hands. He won’t say anything as he gently tries to comfort you by placing his other hand on your cheeks and rubbing it with his thumb. When you stare at his ruby-red eyes, you can see all of the emotions inside them, afterall the eyes are the windows to the soul, right? You can see sadness, shock, disappointment, anger and confusion all jumbled together. It was a mess, he was a mess and so are you.

You couldn’t help but cry in front of him, spouting out apologies after apologies. You couldn’t even understand what you’re trying to say, all you know is that you’re talking nonsense. Diluc stares at you sadly as he shush you gently, he doesn’t need your apologies, he just needs to bandage your wounds.

As he starts to treat your wounds, he notices some old ones as well, scars from your previous attempts. The mere thought of you suffering way before he met you made him wished he met you sooner to prevent this, but alas, even now when both of you are dating, he couldn’t tell you were aching inside. A failure of a boyfriend, he thinks. He didn’t realize how broken you are, despite all of your smiles and laughs, he should’ve seen the hint of sadness behind your smiles. He didn’t realize how you wore thick and long clothing, even on hottest days. Mentally cursing himself as frustrated tears began building up in his eyes.

“Why...? Why didn’t you tell me about this..? Don’t... don’t you trust me..?” Diluc’s voice soft yet so broken, his voice breaking up a few times with how much emotions he’s feeling in the moment. He was lost again, what can he do to make you feel better? Why didn’t you tell him that you’re going through so much pain? Don’t you trust him at all? Tears began leaking out of his eyes at the thought, you also crying at his question, mouth spewing out more apologies. But Diluc doesn’t want your apologies, he’s just wondering why would you do that to yourself?

When you explain to him the reason, Diluc wouldn’t utter another word as he just hugs you after dressing your wounds and bandaging it. His face on the crook of your neck as he sniffles, tears long dried. His hold around you is tight yet not so much, as if afraid that he’ll break you if he holds you too tight. In his eyes, you were fragile like a glass wine. He takes a deep breath, pulling away, putting your foreheads together and staring straight into your eyes filled with love-

“First of, I’m sorry for not being able to see through your smiles and see the pain behind them. I’m sorry for not being there when you’re at your lowest. I’m really sorry that you went through all that. I-.. I can’t erase all your pain and worry. But I can try. Lean on me, trust me, I’ll take care of you, your heart, your soul and your trust. Let me feel your pain and worries, let me in your heart. I promise I’ll try my best to ease the voices of your mind. Because I love you, and I’ll prove it to you over and over again. Don’t ever question my love for you.”

“What do you think you’re doing?”

You can feel it, his eyes bore through your skull as you held the blade close to your chest, about to plunge it inside you. You can feel the heat his eyes are giving you, silently commanding you to put down the blade. Near the doorway, there he stood with crossed arms and narrowed eyes. The mirror reflecting his figure perfectly behind you, your hands started to shake, the blade slipping out of your grasp and onto the tiled floor.

Childe stares at the blade before turning his attention to you, his gaze sharp and his usual coy smile-smirk in a frown, almost a scowl. His bangs covering his eyes slightly, making his blue eyes glow and effectively making him look scary. You can tell that he’s angry, not at you but at what you did.

Mentally, he wished he didn’t witness what he just saw. He wished he could turn back time. But nothing can change what he saw. Why? When? How? Who? So many questions filled his head. Childe knew, a long time ago before he started dating you, that you have scars, scars from your previous self-harming. He thought you stopped. But it seems like his own judgement failed him, he now sees his mistake. He didn’t confront you about it. Now, he suffers the consequence on almost losing you.

He sighed as he starts to walk towards you, his hand reaching out to you. Instinctively, you flinched. His hand stopped before slowly wrapping around your neck, the other wrapping around your waist, hugging you from behind as he kisses your temples. If you look closely, his eyes are glassy. His heart thumping widely in his chest, you could almost hear and feel it, but this thumping isn’t what he wanted to feel. The pit of worry and fear deep in his guts made him anxious and even more scared. His hands began visibly shaking a little, as he chokes back a sob. Since when did he let his guard down? Doesn’t matter as he cries. His thumb rubbing your shoulder part and the other thumb rubbing your waist.

Hearing him struggle to contain his tears, you slowly started to cry as you spew out apologies after apologies. Your hands covering your eyes as you sob your eyes out. He could feel his heart break at the sound of your cries, his arms around you tightened as he squeezed his eyes shut. He shushes you gently as he lets out words that are incoherent and almost random. His mind jumbled so he couldn’t really think straight as he just spews out whatever comes out of his mouth- “hey, you’re okay, right?” “dont cry shhh” “zhongli would kill me if he sees you crying” “he might make me eat with chopsticks for the rest of my life” “I’m a fatui harbinger, the eleventh of the ranks, so why am I crying so pitifully here-“ (yeah,, even i couldn’t understand what he’s trying to say here-)

Childe would stay like that before letting you go and picking you up, bridal-style and bringing you to the bedroom. He lets you sit on edge of the bed before going back to the bathroom. After throwing the blade away (mentally taking note to hide all the knives from your sight-), he came back with a first-aid kit and started cleaning the wounds you inflict on the arms. Yes, you have wounds in your arms, which honestly scared him a little.

He doesn’t speak, neither did you. Silence surrounded you two as he continued to dress your wounds, eyes eyeing the previous scars. He can feel his heart dropping even more when he sees more scars in your thighs and such. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he bandages your arms. After he did all that, you were about to explain to him and apologize when he pulled you in a tight hug. His left hand behind your head and the other around your back, squeezing you slightly.

“I won’t ask why you did that, but I want to know who. Who did this to you? Was it your parents? Was it the people around you? Was it.. me? or... was it... yourself..?” Childe shakily lets out a sigh. “I’m sorry for not helping you through it when its my responsibility as your partner. I’m sorry for not talking you through it when I already knew it from the start and when I see the signs. I won’t promise that I’ll be able to take away all of your pain. But you can lean on me right? I might be a Fatui Harbinger, might’ve killed plenty of people and might’ve started a couple of fights, but I am your lover first and foremost. Above all else, your happiness and safety is what I cater the most. Well, you know, except for my family because well.. their my family. Anyways the point is, lean on me, believe me when I say that I’ll love and take care of you. Through the rest of our years, I’ll be your stone, I’ll be your shield, I’ll be your everything. Tell me all your worries and woes, I’ll listen to every thing. I do love and adore you, my [Y/N].”

[x] Main Page

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact diluc #genshin impact diluc x reader #diluc #diluc x reader #diluc ragvindr #diluc ragnvindr x reader #genshin impact childe #genshin impact childe x reader #childe #childe x reader #self req❣️

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eldrbraus · 2 years

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more on ramshackle active dorm au?? headcanons or smth (this is a bit long, sorry lol)

the uuuhh general hc about the dorm itself

the dorm members have to wear a mask with their dorm uniform, the dorm leader gives it to them

the dorm leader uniform has a mask that is a little like jacks face but it looks more like shinigami (soul eater) before the amam existed, the scary one (?)

also the dorm leader uniform has a big ass black cape that covers them from head to toe (oogie boogie shadow), and under that they.... probably have a suit made of spiders and worms or something lol idk i didnt think about it a lot

they have their own torture basement but almost never use it because they dont really can??? kinda illegal to torture teenagers lol (but maybe use it to scare them shitless lol)

the ghosts are still around and act... a little as the dorm security cameras

theyre very happy the dorm has finally students again, and also happy about the renovations they made

most of the dorm students have a high resistance to almost all kinds of physical pain, like..... if you punch one of them they would probably laugh in your face and punch you back as hard as they can, its a game for them lmao

also theyre very very good scaring people and making traps, its like Their Thing, just like pomefiore students are very good with potions

they all excel in p.e. and are the most playful students in all the campus, never take anything seriously and dont have very good grades... (except the dorm leader, somehow)

(probably have a good relationship with octavinelle students and tried to make a casino before lmaooooo)

also the dorm absolutely has a ghost dog and everyone loves him :)

the dorm colors are black and dark blue (i was thinking maybe black and white are better idk)

aaaand about the students ???

the walking bathtub was something that [shock, lock and barrel students] did their first week of classes and no one knows how to undo the spell so now [lock and barrel students] have to share their bathtub because [barrel student] doesnt have his (its running around the place and sometimes they use it to kidnap people)

the three gremlins actually kidnap people the dorm leader finds annoying but NOT because the dorm leader said so, just because they are bored lol

actually the dorm leader probably looks at the kidnapped student and says

...show them the basement and let them go, or crowley will get our asses

and thats only when the dorm leader finds them out, if they dont, the student will probably be in the basement for a couple days, rip

once the gremlin trio probably kidnapped riddle and the dorm leader was like

you dumbasses. cant you see his blood pressure is going to kill him?? now he wont stop shouting at me in the next meeting. IDIOTS.

actually they probably go to heartslabyul/scarabia dorm the most to kidnap students?? the whole red-sandy claws thing, you know

oh yeah, and the dorm leader themself.

theyre actually a little bit of a mystery

VERY VERY TALL, almost taller than malleus

in the ceremony they got picked as a ramshackle student and well. first time that happened in over a hundred years, so even crowley was shocked lmao

i have no idea how that would even work but i dont care im here to have a good time... thats why i created a new way to make them the dorm leader

because you know. dorm leader is a position you get from the previous dorm leader... could be won in a duel against them or be given but the leader themselves and they retire or something (?)

BUT that cant happen here because no prev dorm leader.........so i was thinking

what if the mirror itself just said

yea youre going to ramshackle, btw stick your hand on me and take whats inside

the new ramshackle student does and

boom the [special magic pen that looks like a ruler staff or something and all the dorm leaders have instead of a regular pen] appears. its kinda weird-shaped (it looks like a black tree branch, with a violet-purple gemstone), and it can actually change forms, unlike the other magical... staffs (?)

they become the dorm leader by virtue of being the only student (theyre in first year with riddle, kalim, the leech twins, azul, jamil, ruggie and silver)

they found the old rulebook for ramshackle and basically follow all the traditions, a little like riddle (except the traditions of their dorm are not weird-ass rules)

and also they fixed the dorm in... very little time. crowley doesnt really want to talk about it, and it weirds a lot of people out asking the dorm leader, so they dont.

the next year the dorm leader welcomes their three official students and... theyre a little surprised actually? didnt expect to have more students in ramshackle, but theyre very happy that little gremlins are getting added to the family and maybe the dorm will finally have its own vice-dorm leader

yuu is very welcomed too, after the whole prologue happens, but even they are a little scared of the dorm leader. yuu is made the vice-dorm leader next to grimm when the dorm leader finds out theyre the official prefect lol, rip yuu

grimm is still a little shit but once he did something very stupid and broke a window and when the dorm leader found out, they said

if you do that again, im eating you.

their voice and face were so serious grimm is now very scared of them and would do almost anything they asked him lol

also about their voice, when they talk to someone, even if theyre saying serious and important things, the other person will feel like theyre mocking them. their voice is low low low and always have this playful tone while they keep a 100% straight face

(always carries a couple dice with them to make decisions, idk)

aaaand i think thats it for now. perhaps ill keep adding things... or not, dunno. you can also help lol, i would like that

anyways, there, have a good time, add your own ocs to this weird au, do whatever you want with it

#twisted wonderland #twst au #ramshackle active dorm au #yuu has a family or something that supports them <3 #theyre menaces to society and i wouldnt let them close to my house like EVER but #little shits <3

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imaginewithtearose · 2 years

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ooooh can i request a matchup with twisted wonderland? she/her, i come off as intimidating and serious to other people because of my serious expression but in reality, its only my normal face and im really shy and awkward when interacting with new people. im really loud and bubbly when im with my close friends. im moody and dramatic sometimes. i tend to overthink a lot of things and i really get insecure when it comes to my appearance. im also easily angered. i always laugh at small things. i always listen to my friends when they're having a problem then after that, i give them my advice. i love astronomy. i read books and write stories sometimes. i like to daydream a lot and i stay up late at night when i have a new idea about a new story. i always love watching horror exploration about abandoned places on youtube. i also love cats esp if theyre chubby. i love dark academia and greek mythology. thats all and thank you!! ^^

Of course! You sound like a nice friend!! Who will be your ideal date? Lets see! I hope you like him!!

Matchup loading . . .

Oh, the results are here! Lets see...

The mirror matches you with...

Idia Shroud!

Ok, he gets it. Intimidating aura, shy persona. Kinda a moe gap if you ask him.

Loves your bubbly persona when he is around you, specially the fact that you consider him so important that you feel comfortable in his presence. If you see his hair, the tips are pink.

Astronomy? Greek mythology? CHUBBY CATS? YOU TWO WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER!!! an important thing to have in a relationship with Idia is things in common. And you got most of them.

Loves to hear you ramble for hours about astronomy and all of the novels you are writing. He just will watch you with a lovestruck sight and a cutesy smile. Of course he pays attention ;)

Your number one fan and your beta reader too! 3 am chats and calls with him discussing about your new idea. He gives you tips and helps you think about characters. He actually wants you to write a character similar to him... But will not say it out loud.

Late night dates with you two on a call, he drinking a caffeinated sugary drinks and you drinking tea or coffee while taking note of everything.

So you love watching exploration videos of abandoned places? Fufufu. Idia watches with you too! He jumps very easily so you have a scaredy-cat at your side. Hug him and he will be okay.

Matching dark academia outfits!!! YES!!! You two will look like the best students out there... Only if you two got out actually. Hehehe. You usually hang out in each others room to play games or watch videos.

The only time you two go outside is if you wanna go, and, if you two are in the search of a CUTE CHUBBY CAT. YES. IM LOOKING AT YOU LUCIUS.

Idia insists that cats approach you easily, mostly because he looks so scary compared to you...

Everyone runs aways when watching you together. They think of you two as the new Hades and Persephone. But are two goofballs. I will befriend you both, really :D

Dont scream to Idia when angry, he is sensitive. But if you are angry he will offer to listen or some distressful toys he has for when he loses online.

He gets your dramatic side actually, he sometimes its a little dramatic when losing or rambling in a quiet voice. Even if he doesnt look like it.

He says that you two would definitely be the best anime villains with your phrases and dialogues. Its a form of vent for you two, pretend to be anime villains or rivals. Its kinda cute.

Loves to vent to you, it makes him secure and less lonely. Yeah this happens in rare occasions.

But he is also worry about you, dont you are tired about so many hearing and advicing? He cant advice but can hear and offer a shoulder to cry.

“Y-Y/n, really, if you... Well, if you are tired... We can watch cat videos... And you can tell me about your d-day.... Please, just let m-me know if you are not okay....”

The first time he saw you, he screamed of fear. Really, you two were scared of each other. He approached you after accidentally discover that you were giving treats to Lucius. Another cat lover fella? You sure aren't that bad... Maybe a little normie...

And your friendship rised. Then your relationship with him messily confessing with everything he loved about you. Your hair, your kindness, your angry faces, your way to play with cats... All of you.

Congratulations, Idia will be a great boyfriend.

I hope this result pleases you! Here are some others characters i had considered match up with you: Sebek Zigvolt, Malleus Draconia, Azul Ashengrotto and Rook Hunt!

#twst matchup #disney twisted wonderland #idia shroud x reader #twst idia #idia shroud #twisted wonderland x you #twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland #twst x y/n #twst headcanons #twst #twst x reader

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yourdaddychan · 3 years

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wow-

literally just wow- i genuinely have nothing to say about this please- i cannot explain how much this means to me- there's 1000 of us- *hugs all of you* [ especially the porn bots ] *turns into formal luna asf*

i remember when i started in may, just a tiny chatbot with only one mutual, only known to you guys as [ answer : admin ]. and now, almost a year later, i have 1k of my chainsaw eating demons who are metal as fuck 💪ive learned so much being on tumblr, as a part of both the skz writers community and the chatbot community. ive made a bunch of friends, lost a bunch of ones, and 1k of you stuck with me. i cannot begin to express my gratitude to all of you, and how much all of you and your interactions with me mean to me. all of the simping, the random stories, everything. i cherish all of it, and i love all of you. aight so letz get to the personal thanking asf

alsoer i kinda wanted to do something sexy so imma do what color they remind me of :D most of them can be found at this link : https://louisem.com/29880/color-thesaurus-infographic

@kvinly linn bb 🥺through all the drama we've been through and shit im so glad we ended up becoming friends again cause we're kinda sexy together 😉thank you so much for being my 1000th follower bb you mean so much to me and if anyone hurts you im about to *turns into jennie and kachows them* licherally lets nevah fight again

-> you remind me of the color punch , and not only because of the name- underneath that grr me edgy grr me bully you're just a softie simp and that reminds me of punch :D

@undeadbots steph 🥺lemme be your personal broken chopsticks pls :( KLDSKLD anywayz we've also gone through some sexy drama and thankfully you saw da light 😉and now look at us, with our own band, and our own producing line 🥺brohemian rhapsody for life bro 🥺 *big kithie for da best dad in da world :D*

-> you remind me of the color viridian , because it gives me confident vibes :D you carry yourself proudly and confidently as you should tbh go steph

@binniesthighs oh look its a cutie *pushes you to a mirror* right there :D RORORO YOUR BOAT :DD we havent talked too much, besides my simping for jisung- but you give me very sexy energy so imma propose rq *gets down on one knee* will you be the rororo to my boat 🥺thank you for being my moot :D

-> you remind me of the color espresso , because espresso looks like the color to be pretty chill and laid back, and you're all of those, and calming to be around

@toshis-flower BAYBEE BEBE BEEBEE :D thank you so much for being my moot and making me a wifey asf ‼️ you're literally so much like me whats not to love <3 JKSDJKD JKJK you're really sweet and really just a good person to rant to, i love you so so so much and i think im going to remarry you :D

-> you remind me of the color taffy , because you're sweet, cute, and bright :D *eats you* yummy

@lov3ric seyoung. i love you. so much. MY SOULMATEEEE :DD even though we tell the story over and over like a bunch of grandmas, ill still never forget how we became soulmates and then bonded over boba 🥺im licherally going to marry you one day like ez 💪also i wanna eat you can i eat you youre really cute *eats you*

-> you remind me of the color daffodil , because it reminds me of banana milk which reminds me of you tbh- buuuttt did you know that daffodils are one of the first flowers you see when spring starts? that definitely reminds me of you because through all of the cb drama, you've always been there with me, like literally always- i cannot express how much i love you *kithie*

@simpchimp LIDDLE CHEESE FUCKER THEMBO :DD drink water *spank* i love you so much you cutie 🥺you're also licherally the funniest person ever like stop bae i kinda need to be the funniest but noer its you 😔alsoer i love how random you are KDSKLD so nevah stop that because then *revz up arm* youre going to get luna-ified

-> you remind me of the color jam , because even though you seem kinda scary at first [ yes i was 100% scared of you ] you're really soft :D

@berrywoo the sun themself 💪you are easily the purest person ive met, and im so happy i somehow became moots with you :D you literally hit diff, yk? theres something about your personality and the way you act thats so comforting, and that means i eat you because youre too cute :D you cant just be a wholeass teacher for kids and expect not to get eaten kids are licherally demons whoever deals with them properly and treatz dem nicely gets a nom asf

-> you remind me of the color honey , because you're a sunshiney yellow, and you're sweet like honey :D i think you need to hear that its okay not to be okay bb, and you can come to my dms anytime you want to rant 😎

@yourchungha MS OG CHUNGHA MS IM KINDA SCARED OF THE SHIT YOU DO MS FURREH LOVER 101 MS ANNA BANANA :D yeah youre like really nice- thats all i have to say- like how tf do you deal with [ redacted ] like eggsplain- ALSO YOURE CARRYING OUR CONVERSATIONS BECAUSE IDK HOW TO TALK TO PEOPLE DKSJKD I LOVE YOU FOR THAT AND WE SHOULD HAVE LIKE ACTUAL CONVERSATIONS MORE OFTEN

-> you remind me of the color scarlet , because youre a sexy bitch tf and scarlet gives me 'idc what you think im hot' kinda vibes which is like exactly you

@satosimp WINTER DADDY :DD i lub you asf *insert we dont talk anymore by charlie daddy* ugh the way your personality matches mine is kinda sexy or whatever im also kinda in love with you but lets ignore that part 🙄 💪 *big kithes* *eats your cats casually*

-> you remind me of the color lilac , because it just gives me tsundere vibes, you act like you dont care but really do care :D you liddle sawftie *noms your cheekie*

@nightshade-minho DUCKIE :DD *insert we dont talk anymore by charlie daddy pt 2* licherally bae where the fuck are you i miss you you bettah be doing well in school otherwise im going to smack you with a chappal asf DSJJKSD *eats your cat because hes such a cutie*

-> you remind me of the color marigold , because you're adorable and sunshiney :D

@onigirimeeya MICHIE MICHIE MICHIEIEEIEI MY DAD :DDD i like you mucho much if you didnt know *kithes you* you're like one awf da best listeners ever- which is such a weirdass compliment but its true- you're really good at listening, and just being a comforting presence in general, like when you go to the beach and youre just staring at the waves all edgy mode, and it calms you down a fuck ton

-> you remind me of the color mint , for obvious reasons- mint choco chip cookie michie :DD

@hhjs bae we dont talk a lot but im kinda lurking on all of your posts- JKDSJSKD bae remarry me please youre really fucking hot 😭and the way you have with words is like damn- teach me oppar asf

-> you remind me of the color wine , because you're refined, and carry yourself in a way that makes everyone want to be you. the color wine is rich and deep, which reminds me of the way you write :D

@nsfw-stay MY LICHERAL BABIE YOUVE BEEN AN ANON FOR SUCH A LONG TIME AND WEVE TALKED ABOUT SO MUCH SHIT TOGETHER [ a lot about seungmin and jisung but shhh ] I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BB AND I WILL NOM YOU >:( BUT SOFTLY AND OUT OF LOVE *nomz yew* :D

-> you remind me of the color cerulean , because its a baby blue and what fits better than a baby blue yk? you're adorable and squishy and i want to nom you 24/7

@secretary-yeji *iz chan ig cause we dont talk admin to admin* oh erm gee is uncle chrith 😉DKLSKLD my liddle koala :D my liddle burgah :D my liddle aussie :D my besth frien :DDD evah since may i think we've been friends, and i think one of the highlights of that day was me marking you as spam twice and on accident too- LKSDKLSD WE DONT TALK ABOUT THAT anywayz thank yew for being uncle chrith's friend *kith*

-> you remind me of the color seafoam , because it's a very soft and light color yk, you're delicate asf which sounds like a bad thing now that im typing it BUT IT ISNT DSKLDSLK YOURE VERY CUTE YOU AND YOUR FLOOFY COWS :D

@ayolistenupp im kinda... in love with you? wtf? KDSDKSL MY DESI DADDY ASF I LOVE YOU SOER MUCH :D our music nights™️ mean so much to me, like theres just something so personal about listening to what the other person likes to hear even though half of your songs are sexy asf KLDSKLD

-> you remind me of the color ocean , because the ocean is loud but calming yk- like you're full of energy but you're also calming :D

@yanderexchungha OH ERM GEE YEW :O YOU PROBABLY WONT SEE THIS IN LIKE 10 MONTHS BESTIE MERRY CHRISTMAS IG KLDSLKD anyway i love you dad your lessons about vape >>> to quote your drunk ass exactly "vape isnt cool" JKSDJ anyway its gonna be sexy if we accidentally run into each other in the hallwayz asf

-> you remind me of grey cause youre a hag- JKJK KDJSD you remind me of the color caramel , because you're sweet, and licherally addictive caramel isnt good for my braces but i keep eating it 😰but youre addictive in a good way :D

@yanderelee literally only doing this because you were moping about not having a simp sunday and im such a good person 🥸you're cool 💪and unfortunately, you're funny too 😥and even though i bully you asf dont take it personally because i dont mean it asf

-> you remind me of the color dijon mustard because you just give those hacker vibes please dont hack me after i said this i like to keep my location private

@kpopswitchbot BESTIE 😏MY FIRST MUTUAL 😏 LICHERALLY DA BEST CUTEST FUNNIEST SMARTEST SEXIEST KEWLEST I CANT EVEN EXPRESS WITH WORDS FISHIE IN DA WORLD :D LICHERALLY STOP OUTDOING ME WITH YOUR GOODNIGHTS LIKE *spankz yew* YOURE LITERALLY TOO GOOD WITH WORDS ITS NOT FAIR- AND THE DAY YOU JUST TALKED TO ME IN SHAKESPEAREAN BECAUSE I FELT DOWN- AND EXPRESSED YOUR LOVE THAT WAY LIKE- PLEASE I ACTUALLY ADORE YOU AND I WILL LITERALLY EAT YOU ONE DAY

-> you remind me of the color coffee , not only because youre addicted to it but also because of the way you act, you're like the definition of an old soul- with the words you use, the drama kid you are asf, etc- you're a talented bitch *mwah* i love you so much you also remind me of those movies where they find an old ass book and they kinda hafta dust it off and it gives you treasure or something cause yeah that reminds me meeting you

AIGHT DAS IT ASF MWAH I LOVE YOU ALL :DDD

#if you wanna know more just drop an ask asf #would be cool if i had 1k for 1k but NOOOOO #i have more btw #*dabz*#THE WAY TUMBLR KEEPS GLITCHING BECAUSE THERES TOO MANY WORDS #NOT SEXY TUMBLR

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tomdiddlyumptious · 4 years

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A.R| Just cry Already

Summary: did arvin take you on a date- oop.

Warning: slight sexual tension, just a little tense, NOT SEXUAL- terrible flirt, and of course unedited

A/n: smack my ass like a drumb ✌️😌- YALL I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE ABOUT BEING LATE- IM HAVING A FEW PROBLEMS AND I HAVE TO RE WRITE THE SHIT I RIGHT BECAUSE IT SEEMS RUSHED!

Chapters -> one ✨ two 🤠 three ✨ four 🤠 five

Arvin isnt a stalker, he just wanted to know where you live, turns out just across the woods. Lenora called him ‘freakin crazy’ while his grandmother called him ‘in love’. He wants to sneak you out so he does, he grabs his coat and nicer pants, he cleaned himself up, brushed his hair back with some water and brushrd his teeth.

“She is gonna love you man” he says to himself in the mirror, after checking himself out. He grabbed his keys and headed out.

You on the other hnd were right awake, thinking about the preacher and how disrespectful he was. “God he just seems-“ you cut yourself off, you were honestly having the second hand embarrassment, how it is to be in his place.

“Im not falling in fucking love, hes a white boy god dammit” you murmured, the room dark and the door closed while you placed your hands under your ear, closing your eyes.

Until you heard a light knock.

You jumped as you looked out your window, a hat appearing as hands start to open the window, you quickly got up and grabbed your heel. You grabbed the foot of it and held the heel up.

“Oh shit- how hard can it be to open a damn window?” You hear youre guessing a man groan, you walk up to the window and see white hands, your first instinct is to pierce it but you soon realize who it is.

“Shit arvin you scared me! I almost put a whole in your hand!” You whisper yelled as you put down the heel softly to not wake anyone up. You grab his hands and let him inside, softly planting his feet on the ground and looking at you with his chocolate brown eyes that the moon shone on.

“Hey” he let out a chuckle as he looked at you. “My dad is gonna kill me and you, what do you want arvin?” You ask seriously, placing your hands on your hips and honestly missing your bed.

“I-uh wanted to take you on a date- as i said theres a drive through and a movie is playing” “is this your ticket to makeout with me?” “I mean no- but that would be nice” you sigh, then you hear wood creak. “Shit! In the closet- NOW” you whisper yell, pushing him to the closet and closing it, throwing yourself on the bed and under the sheets.

Your door opens as your eyes are wide open, your father entering. “Why are you up? And why is your window open?” “Its hot and my head hurts a bit” “not sneakin boys in here are ya?” He switches on the light looking around in your room. “Now why would i do that, dad?” You let out a giggle. “I dont know, i hope you know your my little girl and your never leaving, ever” he lets out rather harshly. Arvin crinkled his eyebrows and mentally added notes about your father, now understanding what you meant earlier.

You gulp and nod, not wanting to answer. He smiles and turns off the light, closing your door all the way shut before stepping off. Sooner or later the closet door opened with a smiling arvin.

“Get changed! We gotta go!” He whisper yells, you smack your lips and sigh in defeat before getting up and walking over to your closet. “Well you gotta get out!” You say, he raises an eyebrow in confusion “of my closet?” He lets out an ‘ohh’ before standing up and dusting his pants off.

You take out some of your brothers jeans, a tank top and some 2 inch black heels. “Arent women not aloud to wear pants?” “So you arent a feminist?” Arvin lets out a ‘pffft’ “of course i am, Especially for you” “oh shut up and let me change” it became awkward of course as you had to hide yourself from arvin.

Of course you didnt have a bra on, so when you took off your night gown your breats slapped on your stomach, arvin just leaning against the window seal with his arm as he watchs you without hesitation “you are such a creep, i can feel you staring at me” you comment. He only giggles as he watches your back move, your glowing back move to put your black tank top on.

You turn to him and meet his eyes “turn around arvin” “why?” “So i can take off i pants?” “O-oh yeah” you give a smile while he turns around, dropping your pants still facing him you grab the jeans and slide them on.

Arvin really wanted to see you, he knows you arent shapped like these others, he wants to touch and admire you everywhere, every flaw would be his favorite part, he just needed his fingers on you. “You almsot done-“ “look?” You ask, he immediately turns around and meets your dressed body, well you didnt button your pants all the way, he smiled as he looked at you up and down “gorgeous” he licks his lips. “Havent took me on the first date” you remind him making him roll his eyes silently.

You both sat in the car, music distantly playing as he had his hand on your thigh, looking at you for some moments while you looked straight ahead. He looked again and you caught him “what?” You giggle, making him smile and blush “your like, really beautiful- i hope you believe me” you bite your lip and shrug “i dont know just yet”.

He bought you the famous pineapple upside down cake and some Bees Knees, as you guys pulled up in the drive through. “Scary movie, classic move arvin” you rolled your eyes. He only laughed as he continued to look for a spot “do like them?” “Yeah i do, which one is this?” “Only the famous Nosferatu” “cool” he chuckled as he parked his Chevrolet Bel Air in one of the best spots.

“I hope you dont think your getting me tonight” you look at him while he sios his drink, he only shrugs “you dont know” he winks. You smirk but turn away from him as you turn on the radio to the right channel, hearing the movie you grabbed a fork and took a bite out of the pineapple-cake.

About an hour in he tried his best to flirt with you. “Hey y/n” he said, you turned to him as he picked up the same fork you had and took a bite, sexually. You sucked in your lower lip to keep you from laughing as he continued to eat it and make eye contact with you. And then he wasn’t expecting it, you started cackling.

He didn’t understand why as he made sure to lick the fork clean. You were out of breath as he rolled his eyes and clenched his jaw. “I-im so-sorry” you only started to laugh harder “b-but that! I cant-“ “whatever” “dont get mad at me, im sorry” you sucked in your laughs and patted his shoulder, giving a playful frown as he looked back at you with his lips tucked to the side.

“Im not mad, no need to apologize hun” “oh we’re doing pet names?” “I mean, yeah” “alright sweetcheeks” you said as he smacked his lips and couldnt fight the urge smile.

He turned off the radio and turned to you, you had your heels off showing your pretty piggies that arvin laughed at, he looked up at you and seen you smiling at him. “What?” He asks, his cheeks slowly heating up. “Youre beautiful arvin” you complement as his cheeks become scarlet. “Your too sweet” he says back, biting his lip to stop himself from grinning more “well tell me about yourself, will ya?”

“What do you wanna know?” You ask as you lean back, your lower lip popping out over your top. “Your favorite color, movie something like that?” “Well, i like F/C my favorite movie is F/M my favorite food is F/F and i love rainy and cloudy days” “how come?” “My little brother, and because they are relaxing” you sigh and give a small smile.

“Well i like red, i dont really have a favorite movie? I love my grandmas cooking so i also dont have one, but i like sunny days- even though we rarely get those” he chuckles, you place your hand on top of his “how nice” you grin.

“I-i feel so embarrassed- about in church- god” he groans. “Dont be arvin- i dont care and nobdy else does- well i dont mean it like that but you know-“ “yeah” he sighs, relaxing a bit as his legs slightly open, his elbow on the ontop of the closed window as he rested his head on his cheek.

You felt happy but sad, you dont want him to feel that way at all, nobody deserves it, not even the racists deserve it. “Look let go of it, it was a moment and you are moving on” “you say that like it was a week ago” “oh well, arvin”

“So you snuck out last night?” Cloudy asks again for clarification, you look at him annoyed but nodded. He chukcled as he shuck his head “ what?!” You ask, slapping his arm as you guys walked down to the lake for a bit.

“Dad is gonna fucking kill you, do you even like this boy?” “We went in one date! And it was nice, we actually have an emotional connection” “how much?” He asks looking at you. “We talked the whole movie through” “i swear if he-“ “calm the hell down cloudy” you giggle, he only rolls his eyes as he huffs.

“I hope you know no one is gonna be happy” “well I guess im thankful for you” you wrap your arm around his arms, holding his shoulder in your hand and rubbing it some as he chukles. “How was school by the way?” You ask suddenly, he only shrugs as he looks at his moving feet “talk to me cloud”. “I seen lenora around and stuff” “did you talk to her?” “No” you sigh as you shake your head in disappointment.

“Well get out of your comfort zone- do something” you raise your eyebrow at him, slightly annoyed. “And who are you to tell me what to do?” He says, cocking the same eyebrow. “I am your sister, your older sister- the one who-“ “changed my diapers” cloudy mocks, already knowing what you were gonna say.

“Exactly, although we might not be able to do a whole lot of things that doesnt mean we cant bend the rules just a bit, right?” You give him a small smile as he chuckles “you are the exact opposite of dad” “i know- thats why you love me so much” you giggle as you take your hand from his shoulder and start walking normally side by side.

“Hey y/n?” Cloudy asked after a few minutes of silence, he looked at you as you hummed and told him to continue,” you know how you promise me and mom that youre gonna take us out of here?” You looked at him and nodded.

“Do you ever rethink it? Or even think about leaving us?” He hesitated. “Well- i dont pray, i dont work, and i barely help anyone. So sometimes i do think about it- think about if we do get stuck here, if we dont leave and if we are gonna stay miserable” “so yes?” You nod and poke your lower lip out.

“But when you saved lenora- do you think that god seen that as a good sign for you?- like arvin is a good sign?” He asks curiously, you only shrug and bite the side of your lip. “Are you telling me your believing in god now cloud?” You ask him. “I mean- he did make this earth right?”

You stop dead in your tracks and he follows turning to you as you put your hands on his shoulders and gives them a squeeze, making cloudy groan but pay attention. “Look here- i dont care that you belive in god- but what you wont do is put faith in that god damn preacher, ya hear?” You say sternly.

You were never really serious when you talked with cloud, you had no reason to be hard or hate him. Hes your younger brother after all right? But he knew when you gave him those talks he needed to agree, he always puts faith in you and believes what you say because your really all he has.

Dad is manipulative- whatever mom said to him was because dad told her to. When you were young you barely listened so he kinda gave up on you, so when cloudy was born you took him under your wing because you utterly refused for him to be brain washed by the asshole of a dad. Why did your mother even get with your dad? Because she was desperate and vulnerable.

She killed her brother, on purpose. Your uncle is sick- was sick. He tried to touch your mom also- to all the black folks she was the prettiest girl in the small town- and your father took advantage of it. Your mother was always a free woman and doesnt like to be trapped, but as she got older she grew tired and just gave up- just listened- it meant less work for her anyway.

He nodded “yes ma’am”. You give him a weak smile as you find yourself next to the river already. You heard giggles and the water waves as pictures flashed, then a strong punch. You silently slapped your brother as you told him to get down, both crouching knowing you had to get out of there.

“I want you to go the car cloud” you whisper at him, crawling ahead and turning to the bushes, slightly getting a view of the people- of course white people.

“Im not leaving you y/n-“

Shots fired.

“Get your dumbass to to the fuckin car NOW!” You whisper yell, cloud stunned but quickly taking the keys from you and running to the car. You start crawling more and see an old man, well mid-30s with a camera around his neck and a women fixing herself- and of course a dead man bare naked with bloody coming from between his legs.

You sat there, shaking, your hand making its way up to cover your mouth, your eyes widening with shock as they started to take care of it.

Now you knew better then to report it because it only meant bad for you, but what happend- what you just saw is absolutley horrible. You only froze and continued to watch almost forgetting about cloudy, you look back at the parked cars and back at the couple your guessing- but they’ve disappeared.

You took your chance now to run back to the car, lifting your pink dress and running in those combat boots. You saw cloudy basically mesmerized- paying no attention as he just looked ahead- the keys already in and the car started as you just drove away.

Taggie! @jeyramarie

#tom holland x reader #arvin russel x reader #arvin russel x black!reader #tom holland x black!reader #tom holland series #tom holland fanfic #tom holland x you #jb writes

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warmau · 4 years

Text

☆ ko-fi request: ghost!seonghwa au

the first time it happens - you think you’re just seeing things

you had been getting ready in the morning and where trying to see if the weird birthmark on your temple had just popped up suddenly or if you had accidentally faceplanted into a felt tip marker

when you think you see a figure standing beside you

you whip around like you’re in an indiana jones movie - arms raised, but there’s nothing there

and there shouldn’t be anything there anyway - you live alone afterall

you shrug it off, realizing seconds later you’re running late for work

and grab your things in a rushed frenzy out the door

as you turn the lock, the figure appears again and floats a little closer to your mirror

he blinks at his reflection and then disappears again

the second time it happens - you start to get worried

you’re dancing around your bedroom and its close to midnight - the music is cheesy 80s pop that you never tell anyone you’re into

but just as you reach for the hairbrush below the mirror to use as an impromptu microphone

you stop short because you SWEAR you see another face behind you

this time, you have your hairbrush weapon raised as you turn on your heel

but again

the room is empty

as you rush over to switch from one of the songs that comes up on shuffle that you can’t lip-sync to

you don’t notice the cold apparition that sways past you

he looks over your shoulder and blinks as you swipe past the prince album, it’s too bad - he kind of likes that one

the third time it happens - you are one hundred percent sure your apartment is haunted

you could blame it on the fact that you just pulled an all nighter for work and now you’re trying to figure out where you put that important slip of paper, rummaging through the piles of stuff in front of the mirror

when you glance up and

there he is again

or it - or whatever

and you don’t turn on your heel ready to fight, you just straight up and ask - out into the expanse of your four walls

“whose there?”

no answer

you sigh

“one time is a mistake, two times a coincidence but THREE times it means i have a -”

“ghost?”

“yes a ghost, thank- OH MY GOD?!!?”

your hip hits the side of your desk and you cringe at the pain, but most of it just fizzles away with shock because

there he is

the - the ghost?!?!

no way, he’s not the ghost this dude is like attractive. then wait, did he like break into my house?!?!?

a million and one thoughts run through your head

so much so that you don’t notice that the figure is floating about a foot off the ground

and parts of his body are blinking in and out of the air

you just stare until he goes

“yes. im the ghost of your apartment. my name is seonghwa.”

“ni-nice to mee- wait, so you are a ghost?!?!”

you jump forward and he floats a bit back

you don’t know if you’re still scared or just curious now as you study the outline of his face which looks very much alive

he’s got dark and pretty eyes

with almost black hair that’s combed in neat bangs

his lips are pretty and pink - not white and brittle like you’d expect of a ghost

and in general his physic is lean and -

you see his leg blink in and out of the air, then his arm too

oh well ok yeah he is definitely a ghost. damn it.

“di-did you d- did you live-here? wh- why are you like um-”

you try to find your words and then give up

“why are you showing yourself to me now?”

“i was shy before, im not very good looking-”

you put up a hand to stop him

“ok ill stop you right there becauses that a lie, you are very handsome. so whats the real reason.”

you’re surprised with how calm you just said that, but really its the most levelheaded thought you can comprehend right now

“well i didn't want to scare you, that would be rude?”

“but you are showing yourself to me now?”

“you asked me who was there so i came out, its more rude to hide - isn't it?”

part of you wants to argue that that doesn’t make sense, but he’s a ghost and you’re partially upset that he’s such a handsome ghost

the other part is like, well it is true - i did ask who was there.

either way you sort of stand there

wondering what in the world you should do now

you didn’t actually think the ghost would come out and like introduce himself

at most you thought he’d like slam a door shut to spook you or something

and now he’s just stan-floating in front of you

looking like that,,,,,,unfairly,,,,,,,like seriously whys he more pretty than you

and also why -

you snap out of it and remember the second time you though you saw him - asking him right away:

“did you see when i was doing the um, the um...the dancing?”

he blinks and then bursts into laughter and you groan

“oh my god - you did see it!”

“it was very good-”

“don’t lie again!”

you cross your arms and seonghwa fights off a fit of chuckles

for a ghost, he sure can make noise

“well are you going to stay now that i know you’re here?”

it’s the only thing you can think of, now that you know you’ve been putting on a clown show for the hot ghost in your apartment

he floats a little closer, then tilts his head

“i can leave, but i can stay - that’s up to you.”

you kind of don't like that its up to you - but you look him up and down again and like

its not like he’s scary,,,,,,,,,,,actually hes nice to look at

you dig around for an excuse in your head and finally mutter

“well i mean i dont want you telling other ghosts about my dancing so i guess you can stay but promise youll leave when i do the - you know the - thing”

he looks to the side and then snaps his fingers

“oh like when you’re undressing?”

“DANCING!”

your cheeks burn suddenly - real embarrassment at the thought of that happening

“an-and that too....”

he frowns

“ok i understand the undressing, but i do like your dancing.”

“hey what did i sa-”

“im not lying, you said im handsome and im just pointing out that i do like your dancing.”

with a wave he disappears into the wall

and you aren’t sure why you’re so giddy over a ghost boys compliment LOL

#ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez au #seonghwa scenarios #seonghwa imagines #seonghwa au #member: ateez #sfw #ghosts/#seonghwa #ateez

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tigerdrop · 4 years

Note

okay kind of obsessed with the body swap art tho. idk why i just like benrey getting to bully gordon with his own body, his own voice, and i like gordon trying to navigate whatever weird shit benrey’s got going on. gordon not being able to figure out or control whatever organs in benrey’s throat produce sweet voice so it’s just spewing whatever emotions he’s feeling at random (including Horny? uh oh. can’t hide that as easily as a surprise boner can you gordon?)

this ask kicked me into actually thinking about it and your brain is so huge. massive. i lost control

last night i was struggling to articulate thoughts for the body swap thing but this is kickstarting me. i. really love bodyswap stuff........(sighing) i am yet again having to confront the fact that i latched onto an embarrassing number of Things after having first read about them in [REDACTED]. truly hate being alive

so like......potions. you can get into a whole lot of weird stuff with potions. truly loving that darnolds 5-minute existence gives me an excuse to think of the stupidest horny potions scenarios

and why in the fuck wouldnt he have a bodyswap potion just chillin in his lab. why wouldnt benrey crack that bad boy open and take a sip while darnolds bitching at him "dont you touch any of those goddamn potions. im not gonna tell you which ones which so if you die, you die"

gordon claps benrey on the back afterwards like "well, thats a risk im perfectly happy for him to take" but uh oh you fucking buffoon. the touch is what activates it. and shit just starts spinning and schlorping in his mind and he nearly falls over clutching the lab bench next to him and when he cracks his eyes back open, hes........shorter. and everybodys asking if somebodys okay but that somebody isnt him and hes kind of miffed about that

and then gordons head turns and he sees Himself being steadied on his feet by tommy and darnold and hes like.......guys? guys. hello! and the sound of benreys voice coming out of him with that irritated and loud timbre makes everybody turn to face him........b/c that is so insanely weird coming from him

im like way into the idea of benreys, like, Eye Darkness Thing transferring to gordons face when their bodies are swapped, too. its just his malevolent energies manifesting physically no matter what body hes in

Wait god wait. Like. Benrey in Gordon's body and he gets horny for some reason and has to live Gordon's fucking pained life of the suit edging the hell outta him- Bc now Gordon can actually fucking jerk off for the the first time in days. No edging bullshit from the hev suit

benreys newfound appreciation for why gordons such a bitch all the time

RRRRRRRRRRR gordon able to go wild beating his meat that night finally but right before he does he stops because hes looking down at. 8)!

YES EXACTLY....... gordon freeman humbled by the sight of benreys huge meat. except its his meat now

at first he only feels mildly weird about jacking it when hes not even in his own body right now but hes been edged for days now and hes just thinking "if i can just get this out of the way now, ill be clear-headed for however fucking long im stuck in black mesa. maybe this is why ive been so goddamn stupid lately. yeah"

but then he gets some time and space to himself at long last and unzips and the shock of seeing benreys huge uncut dick instead of his own brings him back to reality like "?oh my god what the fuck am i doing"

embarrassment! guilt! but also hes still fuckin horny and eventually curiosity wins out. whats the harm, right. its not like he has to say anything about it. and gordon freeman is (mostly) heterosexual and hes never been this up close and personal with a foreskin before and hes just......curious. scientifically

maybe hes even.......locked himself inside one of the company restrooms while hes at it. just to make sure hes got privacy. and there is a mirror right there........ he was gonna just bust one out and leave as fast as he can but now hes curious

starts. thumbing the hem of his shirt under benreys vest. starts lifting it up experimentally just to see where all that hair leads. out of curiosity. and seeing the curve of benreys stomach peek out in the mirror makes him hiccup on sweet voice inadvertently

weirdly enough theres a part of him thats both relieved and disappointed that hes never seen that color before

he never envisioned that seeing benrey like this would be a turn-on but like......with that vest and that helmet on he just looks like some kind of fuckin roundish rectangle shape. but now gordons intimately familiar with how his body feels to move around in......what hes gotta look like underneath all that armor and ill-fitting work clothes......and the hornier he gets the stupider he gets

takes off the helmet.......just to test the waters. if somebody manages to bust in, thats not so weird to explain. and hes surprised by the shock of black hair he finds under there. he doesnt know what he was expecting....but honestly, benrey looks, like, kind of nice like that. more like a person

im slightly obsessed with the idea of benrey just not even registering as a Real Guy, physically, to gordon, one that he could possibly be attracted to, until hes out of his work uniform.......like hes more of an icon of a person than anything up until that point. pure signifier. no substance

like......you know......the equivalent of how benreys HL model registers to 99% of people watching the series. sure, thats not necessarily anything youd register as "hot", most likely, but then u peel that away and its like........Oh

the model is the icon and the representation of the icon is the real

and gordon runs a hand thru benreys hair and tries out one of those shitty little smirks benrey likes to use on him and the effect is.......dizzying. is that him? is that what benrey really looks like to him?? he feels fuckin salacious doing this

he can even.........get his face up close to the mirror and really look at those teeth

run his tongue over them experimentally.......feel their sharp edges.......and, no, theyre not sharp like a knife, but they are definitely pointy. and surprisingly well-kept......hes never seen benrey brush his teeth before but clearly he must. theyre so smooth and slick under his fingertips

and then he flushes and drops his hand b/c hes getting some weird fucking thoughts right now........but looking back up at himself in the mirror and seeing benreys face all wide-eyed and red makes the issue worse

oh, you really like seeing him look like that, dont you. and gordons pissed b/c this isnt even his fucking brain but its still whispering the exact same neurotic, self-defeating shit at him that hes trying very hard to tamp down

and then he starts getting a little crazier. taking off the vest. he can explain that, no problem. its just kind of hot. heavy. he needed a breather! its normal. just in here to splash some water on his face and cool down, nothing wrong with that. but that just makes benreys shirt all the easier to access.......and he tugs the hem of it just a little higher and looks at himself in the mirror and runs a thumb over the curve of his stomach, where the hair is thickest, and he shivers

gordon freeman is deeply normal and would never get off to the sight of a guy with arms the size of his head tentatively dragging the hem of his shirt up, just for gordon to look at him closer

hands shaking from nerves as he decides to loosen his tie and start unbuttoning and he sees more and more hair-dusted skin and muscle and fat and a thin sheen of sweat reveal itself

> i could see gordon trying to tense and flex the muscles a bit just because hes normal

HE IS, AND HE WOULD

he doesnt know when "being horny b/c hes been pent up and edged for days and he just needs to get his rocks off real quick so he can be normal again" turned into "being horny b/c the way benrey looks under his uniform is scary good to him" but if he thinks about that too hard hes gonna have a panic attack

tells himself that its all just because he hasnt been able to get off. thats why hes thinking this shit. hell stop thinking it once he nuts

> hey this is a quick aside but yknwo how he talks to himself in third person sometimes? what if he does and then kinda does a mental double take at how his name sounds coming out of benreys mouth, with his voice. ok thats it goodbye

oh ym god thats making me go insane. doing it by accident and then.........saying it again. on purpose. just to hear benreys voice doing it

getting one knee hitched up onto the sink and leaning forward with his arm braced against the mirror and his forehead leaning on his arm and tugging benreys dick (no, idiot, thats your dick right now, stop thinking about it) and tentatively groaning out his own name and it comes out so hoarse and desperate that it punches him straight in the gut (too bad, hes thinking about it, he cant not think about it, not with the way he looks and sounds right now)

> remember in the series when benrey called him gordon one (1) time and he noticed immediately and was like..i think thats the first time youve called me by my name.

he looks so fucked out and slutty in that mirror that it almost makes him pass out

eyes darting like hes trying to commit every single detail of how he looks right now to memory (b/c he is. he fucking is. he wants to make benrey look like this so fucking bad. just for him. wreck him and get him flushed and sweaty and panting and moaning gordons name and jesus christ, okay, thats where his brains taking him. okay. cool)

hes dizzying himself thinking about it. he knows benreys hot for him by this point, theoretically. assuming his weird come-ons werent just jokes. benrey would probably let him do this to him. benrey would probably want him to touch his dick. gordon thinks about how good it might feel for his own hand to be on benreys dick and he cant get himself solidly into one headspace or another - hes gordon, hes benrey, he wants to touch, he wants to be touched, he wants to feel his own hand on this dick (and god, maybe he could. maybe he could ask. wouldnt that be crazy.)

benrey in gordons suit and gordons body and gordons face leaning over him, b/c fuck, he really is tall compared to benrey, hes figured that one out awful quick. and gordons (his) hand on his (benreys) dick and stroking him and leering down at him with those dark, dark eyes that dont even really look like his eyes, anymore, not with the way theyre shaded over, and hearing his (benreys) (his) voice moaning out his (gordons) (definitely gordons) name and all the little "pleases" and "thank yous" that he cant stop letting out b/c benreys voice was made for it, made to beg and whine and ask so nicely, and his heads spinning as he comes all over the fucking mirror and sink

> i wonder if this could be combine with the ideas that parts of the self or like mind is still a bit left behind if that makes sense, like with benrey also wanting this that part of the reason gordon wants to say those things

"do you want to fuck him or do you want to be him?" well my good bitch, perhaps you can have a little of both. welcome to my personal hell

hes never come so hard in his fucking life and the noise that rips out of him when he does, finally, after days of being jerked around (ha ha) makes his ears burn with shame

now if you really wanna go crazy. imagine that benreys up and walking around this whole time b/c being edged by his stupid broken suit is making it impossible for him to sleep, and he hears........all of this. stops and presses himself flat agains tthe wall to listen

he cant actually get into the bathroom to scare the shit out of gordon/offer to join in/etc, b/c this stupid flesh body of gordons cant even noclip, but he can press his ear to the door and. listen. and he can flush all the way down to his chest when he hears gordon in there, moaning out his own name with benreys voice

so thats what gordon wants him to do, huh. thats what hes thinking about.

poor benrey, tho. he gets to experience just a lick of the endless fucking suffering that gordon goes thru every single day just by being alive, and "the HEV suit trying and failing to suck him off to completion while his dick twitches against the hard metal of the interior every time gordon groans in there" is just one small part of it

anyway . see ya. my final message

#asky #writin stuff

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