#also let me know if i got the breeds wrong bc i was just kinda eyeballing it

[love-fictional-ppl]

Bf!James Headcanons

Summary: sfw + nsfw headcanons for bf!james

Pairings: James Potter x gryffindor!fem!reader, platonic!marauders x fem!reader, platonic!lily evans x fem!reader

Warnings: language, James is a simp, nsfw stuff duh, underage drinking, switch!james, boobjobs, mention of pegging, cum (idk i think im js kinda fascinated by cum), oral(male and female receiving), breeding, slight choking, contraceptives, way more I just don’t feel like listing.

A/N: characters are set in their 7th year.

SFW:

First off, we all know this man is a simp for his girl. Like he is down bad.

This man will go and buy you candy from Honeydukes, he will buy you all sorts of stuffed animals, you name it.

Give him homemade gifts! He loves it! Collages, bracelets, small gift baskets, flowers and flower crowns

James absolutely loves when you have a shared class with him, the way you walk hand in hand to the class and sit a seat away from him. He constantly is passing notes back and forth with you and getting in trouble for it, but he doesn’t care one bit.

Sirius loves to tease James for how “pussy whipped” he is. James can’t even deny it.

Permanent puppy dog eyes when he looks at you.

Surprisingly good at gossiping with.

You steal his clothes and he is perfectly fine with it, in fact he prefers it. Sometimes he’ll even bring you a random piece of his clothing bc he wants you to wear it.

You were James’ date to the Yule ball. Sirius spiked the punch. Remus was a victim of the punch.

Oh god. One time the marauders went out to the shrieking shack and got super drunk, James wouldn’t stop whining for you. When the boys came back they sent Lily to fetch you. You got stuck sitting with one very intoxicated James Potter in the common room, you both wound up falling asleep on one of the sofas. The next morning you were woken up by James running to throw up.

Loves to take you on picnics next to the Black Lake. This boy can’t help spoiling you.

He just sneaks in the kitchens and the house elves give him all the food for your dates.

James’ parents adore you, their house is practically your second home.

You come to every quidditch game, you wear one of his scarves and wear as much gryffindor clothing as you can.

You scream James’ name and cheer for him, you give him a kiss after each game and you give him a little more than kiss when they win.

Play with his hair. He will start purring.

He smells like grass, sandalwood, cigarettes from sitting next to Sirius and aftershave

Will use your lotion, perfume, lipgloss, chapstick, boy don’t care.

NSFW:

Oh my lord. James is in love with your body. He wants to touch every part of you all the time.

mating press, full Nelson, cowgirl, missionary are his favorite positions. And let me tell you, he knows how to hit.

Boob jobs. He’s obsessed with them, he loves to make it messy by cumming all over your face and tits.

Ultimately James is a sub leaning switch. He’ll fuck you just how you want tho don’t worry.

James loves trying new things. He will come to you with porno magz he snatched from Sirius asking you timidly if you want to do that stuff.

He has the highest sex tolerance ever. James’ always hard and always needs to go, he can fuck 3-4 rounds b4 he’s down.

Peg him.

He’s so loud when he’s subbing. James will moan and whine and babble at you. When he’s in charge tho… he’ll dirty talk and groan and grunt, occasionally a whimper.

He loves to cum on you, on your face, tits, ass, thighs, pussy. He wants to see you drenched in it. He loves how messy and gross you look after.

James loves to cum inside of you also, he has a massive breeding kink. He will keep pumping you with his loads, so make sure to tell him to stop and learn sum morning after spells.

Prefers giving head over receiving. Don’t get me wrong, he loves blowjobs but he loves the taste of your pussy a tad bit more. James eats like a god too. He will overstimulate you just so he can slurp up your juices.

The blowjobs are great in their own way, the soft warmth of your mouth, how expertly you work his cock, oh and the gag reflex that drives him crazy. He almost busts on the spot.

He loves to fuck you in the showers after his games, his way of blowing off steam. After a particularly hard game, his hand may snake around your throat causing your vision to blur and you to lose your breath.

Getting handled by James is the definition of getting manhandled like a rag doll. He forgets his own strength.

He hates condoms, would rather pull out or some other contraceptive.

Baby is definitely a pervert and steals your panties, you know but just don’t care since he always returns them. He takes them to sniff and lick sometimes James wraps them around his cock and masturbates to the thought of your tight little cunt.

He is a fan of degradation and praise, giving and receiving.

Mommy kink. He will suck on your tits too, if you could produce milk, he would love it. Just wants you to baby him.

He has really sensitive nipples, do what you want with this info.

Good with after care, he’ll clean himself up then grab washcloth and wipe you down, afterwards lying down, cuddling you and thanking you.

Not proofread! I was bored ash so do what u want with this😭 ngl I kinda wanna write a stepdad!james fic next

#harry potter #hp universe #james potter x reader #james potter smut #james potter #james potter x fem!reader #marauders era #marauders #smut #bf!james potter #sub!james potter #fluff #i love james potter

[learnyouabiology]

Fun Fact: Hognose snakes are dramatic lil guys!

I am particularly fond of the snakes known as hognose snakes, and my reasons are both understandable and correct.

This is a hognose snake:

(They received their name by having the sweetest lil snoot to ever require a boop – image source)

They use these adorable snoots to burrow under sandy soil using a sort of nuzzle-y motion. They then use these burrows as a place to sleep at night, hibernate in the winter, and lay their eggs. 

(you could say they’re into... the Underground Scene! ...ok yeah i’ll show myself out – image source)

Plus, they come in a variety of delightful colours!

We've got brown! Beige! Yellow! Black! Red! Orange! Tan! Kinda greenish! Orange again!

(pretty sneks! – Here’s all the image sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

And, to be clear, the snakes pictured above are wild snakes. No selective breeding by humans in these noodly bois! At least, not in these specific individuals. probably. I guess a few of them could be escapees... 

But most importantly: These snakes know the true meaning of DRAMA

Hognose snakes are actors, first and foremost. When they feel threatened, the first thing they do is puff out their neck into a hood. 

(like cobras, this hood is made by FLEXING THEIR NECK RIBS. which: gross – image source x)

This superficially makes them look like a cobra, but what they’re actually trying to do is make themselves seem bigger, and therefore scarier. Possibly those dark spots on their neck helps with that! 

Any resemblance to real-life Eurasian cobras, real or fictional, is purely coincidental

Also, it makes its mouth do this:

(Snakes that SCREAAAAAAAM. – image source)

honestly, if I didn’t already know that hognose snakes were harmless, this would ABSOLUTELY make me leave it the hell alone 

But if all of that^ is unsuccessful at scaring away the predator, the hognose snake pulls its signature move: playing dead

If you think that is a lame signature move, then you are wrong, because hognose snakes put EVERYTHING into their performance and I love them for it.

(they’re serious, they’ll do it!  – image source)

((I’m actually going to stick the rest of this under a read-more, bc the pictures of the alive-and-physically-fine hognose snakes do kind of look like a legitimately-dead hognose snake, if you don’t know what to look for. 

So, uh: cw for a snake being too good at pretending to be dead))

Behold: a series of completely healthy, unharmed snakes!!!

(to help with their self-esteem, we ask that you at least pretend to believe that they are dead – image sources 1, 2, 3, 4)

Honestly, the photos don’t do it justice. Here’s my favourite video of the whole wonderous performance: 

But to review:

There's writhing! There's dramatic noises! There's flipping onto their back and opening their mouth wide and letting their tongue hang out! There's excreting a combination of  intentionally smelly substances!!! Truly a master of the art of being left the hell alone (*^▽^*)

(yep. deeeeefinitely dead. not just faking it. nothing worth eating here! – image source)

Personally, my favourite part of this is how they insist on rolling onto their back, even when they are rolled back onto their stomach. 

Seriously, if you try to roll them right-side-up, they will flip back over. It's as though they believe that a good, proper dead snek MUST be on its back, obviously.

(truly fearsome – image source)

Sadly, the hognose snake may have made itself too scary, according to humans.

Out of fear, these snakes are commonly killed on sight 😔. I once heard someone proudly brag about how they’d killed a dozen cobras! In southern Ontario! Where cobras do not live! This is both extremely frustrating and deeply sad.

(safe enough to hold! although maybe don’t, just because this snake IS probably experiencing mortal fear, which is not a good feeling – image source © Dean Stavrides)

So just to highlight: hognose snakes are completely harmless. They’re just pretending to be fearsome!

(not that people should be killing venomous snakes either, imo. Let the danger noodles LIVE THEIR LIVES)

(i is baybee, pls do not hurt me – image source)

And now some bonus facts to help raise us out of that downer:

Hognose snakes are toad specialists! Their favourite food is toads, which is unusual, because toads are poisonous. Hognose snakes deal with this by force of will and also, at least two amino acid substitutions, maybe (Mohammadi et al. 2016). Possibly a few other things help with this, also (Feldman et al. 2016).

(is snek eat toad? or does toad wearing cape of snek? impossible to tell, really – image source)

Also, I have a confession: hognose snakes... are venomous. Technically.

(itty bitty little fangs at the veeeeery back of their mouth!  – image source)

They are known as rear-fanged snakes, which means they have fangs aaaall the way at the back of their mouth. The venom they produce seems to be toad-specific, and is considered to be harmless to humans unless you happen to have an allergy but that's the exception rather than the rule

(the two hognose species. They are both baybee, but in different ways actually there might be more than two species but these are the two i’ve actually learned about so ALL WELL   – image source)

Also, hognose snakes are big cowards NOT aggressive and I've never even heard of anyone getting bit by a one (outside of one feeding mishap, which we can all agree was an ACCIDENT). 

The series of events that would need to occur for you to be envenomated are so unlikely and bizarre that I assume you would have to be TRYING to get bit.

This has been Fun Fact Friday, bringing you the forbidden noodly boys to try and keep them a little more safe!

.....................................................................

Sources, because I know me and SO DO YOU:

Averill-Murray, R. C. (2006). Natural history of the western hog-nosed snake (Heterodon nasicus) with notes on envenomation. Sonoran Herpetologist, 19(9), 98-101.

Buchanan, Scott W.; Timm, Brad C.; Cook, Robert P.; Couse, Richard; Hazard, Lisa C. (2017). Spatial ecology and habitat selection of eastern hognose snakes. The Journal of Wildlife Management, 81(3), 509–520. doi:10.1002/jwmg.21218 

CHS: Canadian Herpetological Society https://canadianherpetology.ca/species/species_page.html?cname=Eastern%20Hog-nosed%20Snake

COSEWIC. 2021. COSEWIC assessment and status report on the Eastern Hog-nosed Snake Heterodon platirhinos in Canada. Committee on the Status of Endangered Wildlife in Canada. Ottawa. xi + 45 pp.  https://www.canada.ca/en/environment-climate-change/services/species-risk-public-registry/cosewic-assessments-status-reports/eastern-hog-nosed-snake-2021.html

Cunnington, G. M., & Cebek, J. E. (2005). Mating and nesting behavior of the eastern hognose snake (Heterodon platirhinos) in the northern portion of its range. The American midland naturalist, 154(2), 474-478.

Feldman, C. R., Durso, A. M., Hanifin, C. T., Pfrender, M. E., Ducey, P. K., Stokes, A. N., ... & Brodie Jr, E. D. (2016). Is there more than one way to skin a newt? Convergent toxin resistance in snakes is not due to a common genetic mechanism. Heredity, 116(1), 84-91. 

 Jared, C., Luiz Mailho‐Fontana, P., & Maria Antoniazzi, M. (2021). Differences between poison and venom: An attempt at an integrative biological approach. Acta Zoologica, 102(4), 337-350.

Liu, C., Chen, Y., Zheng, Y., Bo, J., Yang, C., Xu, S., & Zhang, S. (2022). Wear Resistance Improvement of Keeled Structure and Overlapped Distribution of Snake Scales. Journal of Bionic Engineering, 1-11. Citing abstract.

Mohammadi, S., Gompert, Z., Gonzalez, J., Takeuchi, H., Mori, A., & Savitzky, A. H. (2016). Toxin-resistant isoforms of Na+/K+-ATPase in snakes do not closely track dietary specialization on toads. Proceedings of the Royal Society B: Biological Sciences, 283(1842), 20162111. 

 Nature Conservancy of Canada: https://www.natureconservancy.ca/en/what-we-do/resource-centre/featured-species/reptiles-and-amphibians/eastern-hog-nosed-snake.html

Plummer, M. V., & Mills, N. E. (1996). Observations on trailing and mating behaviors in hognose snakes (Heterodon platirhinos). Journal of Herpetology, 30(1), 80-82.

Rouse, Jeremy D.; Willson, Robert J.; Black, Ron; Brooks, Ronald J.  (2011). Movement and Spatial Dispersion of Sistrurus catenatus and Heterodon platirhinos: Implications for Interactions with Roads. Copeia, 2011(3), 443–456. doi:10.1643/ce-09-036     

Seburn, D. 2008. Recovery Strategy for the Eastern Hog-nosed Snake (Heterodon platirhinos) in Canada. Species at Risk Act Recovery Strategy Series. Parks Canada Agency, Ottawa. vi + 24pp.

Schwartz, V. & D. Golden (2002). Field Guide to Reptiles and Amphibians of New Jersey. New Jersey Division of Fish and Wildlife

VHS: Virginia herpetological society http://www.virginiaherpetologicalsociety.com/reptiles/snakes/eastern-hog-nosed-snake/eastern_hognose_snake.php#:~:text=Heterodon%20is%20derived%20from%20the%20Greek%20words%20heteros,meaning%20%22broad%20or%20flat%22%20and%20rhinos%20meaning%20%22snout%22

Young, R. A. (1992). Effects of Duvernoy's gland secretions from the eastern hognose snake, Heterodon platirhinos, on smooth muscle and neuromuscular junction. Toxicon, 30(7), 775-779. https://doi.org/10.1016/0041-0101(92)90013-U

Young, B. A., & Morain, M. (2003). Vertical burrowing in the Saharan sand vipers (Cerastes). Copeia, 2003(1), 131-137.

SARA: threatened https://www.canada.ca/en/environment-climate-change/services/species-risk-public-registry.html

#hognose snake #snakes #biology #fun facts #fun fact friday #science #sciblr #science side of tumblr #STEM #adhd in STEM #zoology #ecology #Herpetology #snake #i love these guys so so much #there's more but its late #also this is late #i wrote it last week but then stuff happened #well #i wrote most of it last week #some of it was written in 5 minutes of frenzied keyboard slamming #depression is STILL HERE #but im doing my best #also yes i know it's saturday but LET ME LIVE #Youtube

[cream-stew]

Okay, now that I got those cleared up, could I ask for Itto in either like,, "full oni" mode? (Kinda like his burst art?) Or like, minotaur like? (Hehe monsterfucking lets gooo) with sub!bottom! Ftm trans!reader? Where itto just goes crazy goes stupid for them and just fucks them marathon style? Maybe with some breeding kink if youre comfortable with it in this setting (more so the like, lots of cum aspect if that makes sense?)

I hope that gave enough like, info if you need anything more lemme know! Also yes I dont have any shame anymore. If you catch me in 4K, make sure to send the copies ✌️📸

🔞 minors dni

warnings: ftm trans reader, rough sex, outdoor sex, monsterfucking kinda?, multiple orgasms, creampie, breeding kink, vaginal sex, belly bulge

// note: I picked his burst art bc I've always wanted to write something with it, I hope it's fine🤝

you don't know what went wrong (or right👀) but he's not able to revert to his original form yet, even if he won the fight over an hour ago and the soldiers are long gone.

he's a little frantic, brimming with excess energy, and you try to coax him into following you home, but he's just not budging, only pacing the beach as if waiting for more opponents to show up… you can't think of anything to do that could help him, but you can't leave him there on his own. he always gets in trouble on a normal day, imagine what he could do in this form! he'd probably get arrested again……….

still, you're getting tired of pacing with him, your legs are getting sore and you really want to sit down, so you try and drag him with you.

he follows without complaint, at first, and you think he might be tiring as well, but when you make it to the rock you want to rest on, he sits down first and grabs your hips roughly. he's so tall in this form, and even sitting down he's taller than you. you flush a little as you realize, but you have no time to let your thoughts wander in that direction, because now he's the one dragging you and pulling until you're straddling his lap indecently.

you watch him lick his lips, his fangs poking out, and his grip tightens on your waist, dragging you even closer until you can feel his clothed erection hard against you.

grunting, he moves you back and forth on it, rutting against your pussy with only both of your pants keeping you apart, and you let out a desperate moan. his cock feels bigger than usual, transformed like the rest of his body, and you really want to find out how it feels inside.

you don't have to beg to get him to do something this time, because he's eager to pull his cock out of his pants, and it leaves you enough time free of his grip to remove your own clothes, throwing them to the side just in time for him to grab you again.

he manhandles you until you're hovering just above his huge cockhead, thick beads of precum decorating the tip. the stretch hurts just barely when he drags you down his length, taking his cock to the hilt, but you're so wet you barely feel it, and despite his current predicament he's still aware that he has to give you time to adjust. he stays perfectly still as you moan and tremble in his lap, getting used to the bigger cock, looking down to see a slight bulge where his cockhead must reach, but soon you're moving your hips back and forth, hoping he'll understand and start fucking you.

it works, he uses his grip on your body to lift you up and push you back down again, using you like a human-sized cocksleeve as he grunts and moans, his cock dragging in and out of you and hitting right at your cervix.

he rubs over your sweet spot with every thrust, and it all feels so good that you cum embarrassingly quick, but hey, at least it just adds more slick to help the penetration🙏

he gets bored of the position at some point tho, because he just stands up with your body still cradled in his arms, and starts fucking upwards into your wet pussy just like that, your legs frantically wrapping around his waist.

he cums like that, his seed flooding your guts and adding to the belly bulge, but he has no intention to stop!

you cum over and over, and so does he, breeding you until you're sore and bloated, not falling to the ground only bc he's still holding you up so tightly. you feel so fucked out you can barely think, but you keep moaning and begging him to keep going, his cock somehow still rock hard inside your pussy.

you've lost track of time (and of how many times you've both cummed) by the time he sits back down, stilling his hips and simply cradling you against his chest, but it's night already, and you can really believe you've spent hours being used as a cumdump.

he's reverting to his usual form at least, and he seems in a great mood now that his energy is all expended. he presses a soft kiss to your forehead and promises he'll carry you home and "take care of you like you took care of him today" !

(you didn't even do much, but you definitely won't complain🥰)

#genshin smut #genshin x reader #genshin impact smut #genshin impact x reader #itto x reader #itto smut

[earthtooz]

U WANNA HEAR CHARACTER IDEAS? hold on *scrolls through my 19384567 page document of reo hcs* (i wish that existed)

reo.. reo my luvr. movie nights with him are a NIGHTMARE. my man manspreads over the whole couch like... you can't even call that manspreading anymore. it does NOT matter how big the couch is. he always takes up most of it... almost like a cat. except he doesn't even do it on purpose. will sometimes also fall asleep like this while ur buried underneath him — looks like ur gonna have to sleep on the couch as well, unless you wanna wake him up. oh and, when he's sleeping on the couch, he also snores like a middle aged dad (gets worse once he actually becomes a dad).

ALSO !! talking abt cats... he's actually a dog person. i can definitely see him owning something like a border collie, given his s/o is on board with it and is able to spend time w the dog as well bc i recon he unfortunately doesn't have that much time :(( and i think he'd always wanted a pup when he was younger but that was the one thing his parents never allowed him to get

sorry this got kinda long... i just love reo

DON'T APOLOGISE I LOVE UR IDEAS !!!! I ALWAYS WANT TO HEAR ABT THEM LAY THEM OUT FOR ME ON A TABLE AND I'D SIT DOWN AND LISTEN !!!!

the movie night one is SOOO true :( even if you start upright, on respective sides of the couch, he'll always crawl towards you and lay himself all over you until all you can do is sink underneath him :(( like hey... big man... can you... not? one wrong move and he'll pull you right back, unless you need to pee. at least he's nice enough to let you go momentarily until you come back and he spreads himself all over you again.

oh and his couch is one of those massive 'L' shaped ones so you have more than one option of where to lay whilst watching movies on that gigantic screen of his!!!!

when he rests on the shorter end of the 'L' (i hope u know which part i'm talking abt- the one that sticks out), you know that he's doing that with the intention of fully falling asleep on you because there, he can't even see the damn movie. you have figured out his antics and he knows it but he still gets his way no matter what, even if you coax him.

won't know that you've slipped out of his grasp for a while. i headcanon that reo is one of those sleepers who fall in and out of consciousness, like he just randomly wakes up in the middle of the night and falls asleep breezily again. during these intervals of wakeness, he realises 'what the shit, where did y/n go' and proceed to hunt you down.

the fact he snores is such an endearing ick </3 HELP WHAT IF YOU MOVE AWAY FROM HIM BECAUSE HE SNORES AND THEN YOU TELL HIM ABOUT IT AND HE'S ABSOLUTELY BETRAYED like 'bby... wtf do u mean you don't like my snoring... when you told me you liked everything about me, that must include my snoring'. then you try and justify yourself and just can't without sounding like a hypocrite. you never complain about it again, eventually learning to block out how loud he is, especially whilst next to your ear.

AND THE DOG HC :((( i have a border collie and i love her sm she's the best dog i'll ever have i absolutely adore her :,) ANYWAYS, no i so agree. maybe even a golden retriever or australian shepherd bc they're both such beautiful breeds AHHHHH imagining reo with a small dog doesn't feel right. IMAGINE HIM TAKING IT OUT FOR A RUN OR A HIKE BC IT'S THE ONLY EXTENDED DURATION OF TIME HE CAN SPEND WITH IT :( buys it the most expensive treats too like damn the dog its it up every time!!!

i counter your long ask with an even longer response bc as soon as you enabled me, the floodgates didn't stop.

#haithamuse #≡; ꒰ ° moots: <esther3 #earf's inbox hours ✌️

[jinkicake]

Albedo stupid ass didn’t come home so I’ve been beating his ass in my dreams😒 gunna pretend like I don’t want to wrong his neck while I stroll into the lab asking what he’s doing and then he’s getting tied up like idc im very salty😭 gunna bite his neck bc he can’t do anything to stop me and IK he sounds cute when he whines i know he does!! Then I will kiss sucrose bc I love her( like if you check the data she FR has the thickest ass in mondstat like the graphs aren’t lying) and I will let her sit in the table as I go down on her and she’s just making eye contact w albedo he can’t do a single thing but listen to her moan and grind her hips into my face😔💖 rip chalk man, also I have a bc for sucrose she pretends to be all shy and submissive but when it’s time to get down she’s like “alright hands up I got the handcuffs” SHDHSJ she purposely puts on a shy act to make them lower their gaurd; but this man has been on my mind In the cycle of 7 men who are always on my neck at all times, and it’s so funny bc I didn’t care about him at ALL like I came here for Kayea and Venti and that’s who I’m gunna talk to😤 but then I saw his clone how he’s kinda mean,,, like idk my weakness lies in men who can be cruel without even blinking. Xiao vibes where he’s working and you need attention and he will completely ignore you, this man however will make you cockwarm him for years bc who knows how long all that paperwork could take, your either on your knees or in his lap while he doesn’t even look at you. I feel whining would just make it worse?? Bc then he’ll just play w you until you give up, the king of edging I fear😔😔 he just whispers sweet words in your heart w his honey like voice as he mindlessly shoves his hand between your legs, while his hands are magic is voice is doing most the work he’s definitely top 10 filthiest mouthes in mondstat bc I know his teasing is unmatched!! He would casually mention breeding you as he walks past you in the halls of the kof HQ and it looks like he’s just asking about the weather bc he has no expression on his face. Hmm I feel like riling him up in public is pretty easy tho, probably just have to bend over for no reason, drape yourself over him the boy is chronically touched starved so an extra firm handshake could get him hard💀 but he’s always so quietly demanding, he doesn’t need to raise his voice or squeeze your thigh to get you to freeze in your spot, just gives you a sharp look like “behaving like this won’t get you anywhere” clutching your pearls bc as soon as your out of earshot he’s getting you on your knees while reprimanding you like sir I’m sucking your dick not at a seminar🙄 overall definitely top 10 best dick game in mondstat! Like idk WHAT it is about the Khaenri'ah men,,,, but they’re all fine asf🥵 like dainsleif on my radar too bc ik it’s heavy I know it is

NOOOOOO?! omgggg im so sorry.... you need to kick his ass... i can't believe him! albedo suckssssss for that, how many wishes did you spend on him???

omg?! revenge sex that doesn't include albedo? that's perfect,, i feel like sucrose would let you do anything you want to her.... but i also agree that it's a front like she plays the roll of shy and innocent but when she gets really into it she'll fuck you harder than someone like childe LOL as long as you don't touch albedo then i think that is a fitting punishment for him since he didnt want to come home!!! it'll make him think twice next time!

'men who can be cruel without even thinking' you just explained my current scaramouche obsession like i told myself i would never be interested in him because he's short and a puppet but like..... yandere crazy scara is..... nice. LOLLLL the puppet thing really makes me laugh tho...... and it's not like hes fucking hot like raiden is soooooo she can get away with being a puppet.... on her it's sexy and on him it makes me laugh hehehe

omg ya know albedo kinda reminds me of barbatos.... with how much work they have and how seriously they take their work like.... they would both cockwarm you while they do their jobs since both you and their tasks are equally important to them.... barbatos has to deal w devildom shit and albedo has to deal w destroying mondstadt shit,,,,, they also have to deal with fucking their s/o shit too!!!

EEEEEEK the THOUGHT OF ALBEDO PUNISHING YOU AFTER A WHOLE DAY OF BEING BRATTY MAKES ME SQUEALLLLLL,,,, omg.... he would be so mean and have no mercy since you had no problem teasing him all day.... you'd take him and his evil twins cock at the same time!!! it'll fit, trust him, he researches this stuff AHAHAH

khaenriah men have my heart.... there is just something about them...... i need to stop before i go off on a tangent about pierro. hes so fucking hot,,,, so big,,, i need him BAD.

honestly, between you and me, i don't care for dain that much LOL like his voice is hot and that is it.... you'll probably find a way to get me to like him more though just like w albedo LOL

#sarahandoikawatalkshit #xiaos spicy almond tofu

[takenbyheartstrings]

RHINESTONE EYES.

summary: being married to Marc and Steven leaves you in shambles, worried and anxious every night. constantly worrying about them both even if Marc always takes care of them. one night, Marc comes back frustrated; in need of a distraction, and does it lead to so much more... short to say it works.

pairing: marc spector / (mentions of) steven grant x fem!reader

warnings: ACTUAL DIRTY FKN SMUT!!! (extended warnings under the cut) and slight fluff!! implied poly relationship.

word count: 2.3k

authors note: MY FIRST MOON KNIGHT FIC!!! i've pictured Marc as a pretty dominant person, so here's a fic in the best way i know how to show it.... smut.

also inspired by that one clip of Oscar going "get on your knees, honey.... I GAVE U AN ORDER" 😡🥵 and the fact that Oscar also said we can call him daddy if we want to so..... 🧍‍♀️

this is called rhinestone eyes bc i was playing it on repeat, it holds no context to the fic at all 😭😭😭

if i got anything wrong about DID please let me know!! i'd hate to be the reason someone feels hurt or offended. there's not much talk of it in this fic, but i'm doing research as i write <3

extended smut warnings: p in v, unprotected sex (stay safe tho y'all), degrading kink, daddy kink, pain kink, oral (male & fem), rough sex, back scratching, fingering, choking, breeding kink, spit kink, hair pulling, he spanks ur pussy once lmao.

You’re sat on the couch, you’re missing your husbands, worried about them. Worried about what goes on during the night that’s out of your control… sure, they’ve got their suits, but it doesn’t prevent the worry and the torture of not knowing if they’re going to come home. Konshu is there too, but there’s only so much he can do. You just missed them. You were anxious.

You were married to Marc before you knew Steven, one morning Marc had left the home the two of you shared and hadn’t come back for almost three weeks… you thought he left you. You thought your husband had abandoned you. But he came back, and started to explain to you what had happened, how Steven was also there. How Marc was aware of him. He told you that Steven had no idea about Marc, yet and he intended to keep it that way, clearly, that hadn't worked out… but you knew about all of it. You knew about Konshu, you knew about the suit. You knew about Steven. You knew that Steven had a separate flat and Marc told you about his job at the museum. There was only so much you could do, so you just hugged your husband. Told him it was okay, told him that you understood. Because you did. You still loved him, and you loved Steven, even if you hadn’t even met him yet. But when you had, Steven fell in love with you, and you fell in love with Steven and loved him as much as you loved Marc. They’d often tell you they were jealous of one another when you’d spend more time with them. Marc would often question who’s better in bed, to which you would always answer yourself. Your marriage certificate said Marc Spector. Your last name is Spector. But Steven doesn’t mind, he never had. He was always kinda scared of marriage, anyway, so not being on the certificate was fine for him. Just being called your husband was fine for him. He never got jealous of that.

The door to your apartment opened and you sat up off the couch, you were in one of Marc’s shirts a graphic tee. Marc stood there mad; he was angry, you had no idea what happened, but you could tell. You could tell that he was.

“Marc, thank god you and Steven are back, how is he? How are you?” You run into his arms, despite how angry Marc is, he holds you, calming himself slightly.

Marc presses a kiss to your head, “I missed you,” Marc speaks for himself, holding you – immediately calmer. A little less mad, “Steven’s holding up, just a lil drained.”

His hands run down your body, and you shiver, “That’s good.” You catch something missing in his sentence, “What about you, Marc?”

He shakes his head, “Konshu made us do some fucked up shit tonight and I just,” He presses his lips to yours, “Need a distraction.”

You press your lips back to his, a smile toying on your lips, “What kind of distraction?”

“My favourite kind,” He smirks, pressing a kiss to your forehead, “Unless you’re not up for it tonight,”

“I’m up for i-” you squeal as Marc picks you up and drops you onto the bed, pressing kisses all over your neck, all over the place, your skimpy little pyjamas not keeping much of you covered. Your hand makes its way into Marc’s hair as you groan softly.

Marc wastes no time removing his clothes. He’s not soft like Steven in bed, you’re usually in control when you're with Steven and nowhere near what Marc is like… because Marc is rough, and you love it. The way he’ll fuck your mouth as if it’s your cunt, dripping with spit. The way he’ll pin you down and fuck you so senseless you start seeing spots. The way he makes you call him daddy just to make him feel in so much more control, even though he’s got it all. As Marc removes his clothes, you take the chance to remove your own. You’re already dripping wet; Marc already knows how fucking wet you are. He wants to feel and taste you. Although, he’s not sure about whether he wants to make you get on your knees so he can fuck your face in or whether he should eat your pussy like it’s his dinner.

Marc settled for both, “Get on your knees, honey.”

You nodded, “Yes, daddy,” The word slips out of your mouth, perfectly smooth, like silk.

He could cum at the way you speak, at the words that cum out of your mouth, but he has to refrain at just jerking off at the way you bend on the hard wood floors for him. How your tits hang from your chest, bare and open for him to cup. How you look up at him so innocent, but he knows you’re a slut for him. He knows that you want his cock so bad… and you. You want him to fuck your face. Your cunt is dripping and your stomach fills with anticipation waiting for him to fuck you out of your own head.

Marc stalks over you, “You want me to fuck your face, baby girl?” He questions and you nod, opening your mouth, “Ah, ah, ah, speak to me.”

“Yes, daddy.” There’s the word again it makes him get off, it makes him turned on, just like all the other thing’s he’ll do to you tonight. All the ways he’ll make you cum for hours and hours on end.

Marc finally slides his cock into your mouth, he takes a ball of hair into his hand, moving slowly at first, he carefully moves his hips. In this moment he begins to lose disregard for how you feel, just like he does every time, and it turns you on; it makes your cunt drip. Marc begins to fuck your face, holding your hair. He pumps his cock in and out of your mouth, pressing his slit to the back of your throat as you gag on it. Spit surrounding the thick skin. Your eyes water as he bucks his hips faster and harder. Holding your head in place. He sets off every single gag reflex you have in your mouth and as you gawk at the length of his cock. He pulls out for a second, lets you catch your breath. But it’s so short. It’s so fucking short. He shoves his cock back into your mouth, groaning as he pounds harder and harder inside of you as if he were fucking that same dripping cunt that sits in between your legs.

“Fuck just like that you dirty whore, just like that.” He groans as his cock continues to press to the back of your throat. You can taste the pre-cum dripping from him, as it falls down your throat. He fucks your mouth so hard that there is spit that falls down the sides of your mouth, there is spit that leaks down your neck, covering his cock, making it glisten. Making it shine in the dim light that falls above the bed you share. His cock looks like it’s glowing. He continues to fuck your mouth a little more, slowing down as your hair is now knotted all tangled up from the way he held you in place.

When Marc pulls out and you heave a deep breath, “Fuck me, daddy, please.” You beg, your eyes falling up at him, almost bloodshot red, tears falling from your eyes. He can only smirk knowing that he did that. He made you look like the fucking slut that you are. He groans at your words, imagining your dripping wet pussy. All wet for him.

He shakes his head with a tsk, helping you up and pushing you back onto the bed, “I’m going to eat your fucking pussy and you get no say on when you get to cum. You’re going to have to beg for it, do you understand?”

You nod, “Yes, I understand.”

“Yes, I understand…?” He waits for the word to be said, god, he loves that fucking word.

“Yes, I understand, daddy.” You correct yourself.

Marc smirks, placing kisses and grazing his teeth all the way down your body, your legs hooking around his neck, his head between your thighs, your hand in his hair. Marc’s tongue slides in between your wet lips. The smell of you intoxicating and when you land on his tongue, Marc almost cums. His tongue wastes no time, his tongue presses against your clit, the amount of pressure he places makes you scream and moan. The way he sucks on the nub makes you want to cry. Your fingers twirl in his hair, pushing him harder against your clit. He sucks and he breathes you. He tastes you. This is his favourite thing to do. Pleasure you. His head pulls away for a moment, your fingers becoming a little less connected as Marc slaps your clit. It’s not hard but it’s not soft either. Placing the just amount of pleasure to make your hips buck slightly. Marc doesn’t give you any warning before he rubs his fingers in your arousal and places them into your dripping cunt. His tongue moving back on your clit circling it as he keeps contact with your eyes. Never having looked away from you once. His fingers pump in and out of you, and it makes you moan. You can feel your stomach on fire, you can feel it burn. Marc pulls away for another moment, spitting on your clit, moving his tongue back on it. His fingers continuing to pump. You squirm against his touch.

“Daddy, I need to cum.” You moan, but Marc only shakes his head.

“No. You have to beg for it.” He moans against your pussy as he continues to lick and feel the buzz of how sweet you taste, his fingers getting pruny from the wetness that builds in your cunt, that fills your pussy. Makes it taste oh so sweet.

You feel yourself move against him, your hips bucking into his face, “Please daddy.” You moan once more, “Please let me cum, daddy.”

Marc groans against your clit and he can feel your cunt getting tight, pulsing around his fingers, he pulls his face away, “Cum for me, fuckin’ whore. Cum for me and me only.”

You feel your release against his face, your orgasm as he tastes it, he tastes your cum, he tastes the way you drip for him. God, it is addicting. Marc removes your legs from his shoulders, sitting them up, “I’m gonna fuck your pussy. Can you take it? Can you take it my slut?”

You nod, “Yes, daddy, I promise… I promise I can take it.” You squirm, needing his cock, needing to feel him inside of you. Needing his cum to fill your pussy and you’re both thinking and feeling the same thing.

Marc presses himself into your cunt, no warning and he doesn’t lead you into it this time. His balls are slapping against your ass and he’s pressing his cock so deep into your pussy. His hands make their way up your body and all you can hear is the slaps of his balls and the squelch of your wetness combining. His hand makes its way around your throat, lightly putting pressure onto your neck, it’s slightly harder to breathe, it’s slightly harder to moan. But it doesn’t feel like that, not at all. His hand is strong, the veins of his arms popping out, his biceps exploding from his arms. The muscle is so much and as he groans, pounding into you. He leans over you.

“Open your mouth, you fucking whore.” He speaks once more and you do as he says, your bodies moving together. Your mouth stays open as he lets spit fall into your mouth, making you moan in pleasure. Feeling it travel down your throat. His hand doesn’t let up, clenching it slightly as your body continues to rock. He’s using all his willpower, all his strength in pounding his thick cock into your cunt. Your tight little cunt. You already felt yourself coming closer to the edge, but he would tell you when you were allowed to cum. He is in charge. Not you. You know that very well. Your hands begin to cling to his back, your nails moving all the way down his back, and he pumps his cock in and out of your cunt. They dig deep and Marc can’t help but groan as they run down his body. He doesn’t know it yet but they’re bleeding red marks. Marks that could scar.

You were coming close to your orgasm for a second time. Your stomach was on fire, building knots. You needed to cum for him so bad, “Daddy, I’m gonna cum, please.”

He tsks, “Not until I cum,” He speaks, groaning as you try to hold back your orgasm, he moves his cock faster and faster, in and out of you. Feeling nothing but the desire to cum in your pussy, mark it as his. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum. You ready you dirty little whore? Tell me you’re ready.”

“Fuck!” You moan, “Yes, daddy, I’m ready.” Marc’s cock twitches inside of you and he finally lets his release go, his cum mixes with how much your cunt drips. He continues to pump in and out of you, riding you to your desperate attempt to orgasm.

“That’s right, you can cum for me now.” Marc speaks as the fire and desire in your stomach builds up so much, your face twists as you cum, your mouth wide.

Marc finally pulls out of you, falling beside you, pulling you into his chest, stroking your hair, “You did so good for me, baby,”

You smile up at Marc, “I’m glad you had a good time,” You press a kiss to his warm chest. Feeling nothing but love radiating from the man that lay next to you as the two of you fall asleep.

-

hi tysm for reading! my requests are open! so, if you'd like to request something from me / if you'd like to be added to my taglist!! click HERE <3

@wanniiieeee @itszulli @raajali3 @blankspaceblankday @nostalgiaminded

#steven grant #steven grant x reader #marc spector x reader #marc spector #oscar isaac #oscar isaac x reader #marc spector smut #steven grant smut

[kikisfuneralservice]

CHOI MINHO BF HEADCANONS

always wanted to know what choi minho is like as a boyfriend? your questions have been answered…

includes NSFW content‼️

*ALL CONTENT IS PURELY FICTIONAL AND NON-ASSOCIATIVE WITH ANY OF SHINEE OR SM ENTERTAINMENT- PURELY FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES!*

FLUFF:

always wakes up before you so he ends up getting you something to eat

it isn't even always a full breakfast either sometimes it’s just a poptart and an apple or a granola bar and some orange juice bc u dont trust him in the kitchen

absolutely smitten boy. just a 24/7 simp

unapologetically holds ur bag/purse for you- sometimes not even when ur stepping into a shop, he’ll just take it from you while you’re walking bc it’s “too heavy”

we all just know he wants it to take the gum from ur bag tho we’re not fooled, minho

unironically likes the little blue dots in the mint gum and it’s disgusting but for some reason it’s his favorite part i just wanted to add that idk

vv protective of you - he’ll ask you who you were talking to regardless of gender and ask if u have any romantic attraction to them bc he is nervous

literally no, minho; calm down

loves holding u in his arms bc he likes how small you look compared to him

likes to compare ur hand sizes n shit cuz he’s whipped

also when u walk with him and ur holding hands he likes to swing them bc he thinks it’s cute HA

wants to learn how to do hair and makeup bc he wants to do it for u just to say that he did it

kills spiders for you! and feels proud doing so

tries to call you nicknames, but it always comes out wrong or awkward, but it’s funny, so it’s ok

lets you do his hair and shit because he “wants to look pretty too”

he thinks everything is a competition so even at the state fucking fair he’s throwing his entire body into the ring around the bottle game to get u a giant fucking giraffe doll that u can get easily on amazon for $10

“u need this i must acquire this for you and win”

also is obsessed with those mallet games where u smack the mallet down and it tells u how strong u are

uses his rigged score to prove how strong he is and the whole rest of the day he has his arm around you and flexing the other bc he’s just that satisfied

buys little things that remind him of you

“minho what is this”- “it’s a skunk salt shaker!! isn't it funny??? the salt comes out of his butt! :D” -“how does this remind you of me i’m scared to ask”

knows all your orders by heart

he’ll get to somewhere and get so caught up in your order that he leaves 15 mins later realizing he never got food for himself

it’s ok he just gets mcdonalds on the way home plus he wants the how to train your dragon toy

im writing way too many wow next section

SMUT:

ok so... likes holding your hand- lemme explain

literally loves missionary i cannot tell u why he just does

wants to hold ur hand and keep them against the bed frame 

just wants to be as close to you as possible

he’s hyper-focused on the intimacy part

has a breeding kink i know it

gets excited whenever he’s with kids so when u mention it to him he instantly pops a boner

loves when u sit on his lap bc he likes rutting your hips against him

just cuz ya know

not a freaky guy just wants to hold u tight and love u slow

very vocal bc he knows u like that

it’s not worth it to him if he cant verbalize anything if u know what i mean

doesn't like keeping quiet :)

loves pleasuring u or whatever

very good at fingering you like it’s scary

could get off just on his fingers oops

doesn’t like toys bc he only wants him to satisfy u and thats it >:(

NEED TO ELABORATE ON THE BREEDING KINK FOR A HOT SEC

simply just gets hard at the thought of getting u pregnant nAUR

so when ur like “let’s have a baby” and give him those eyes

whewy ok

pounces on ya

goes rough bc he’s excited and he thinks if he goes faster that it’ll get u pregnant faster AHHAAHAHAH

has always loved having sex w you but after this it kinda solidifies it and he’s like we gotta do it everyday 👀 so it’ll work 👀 and ur like honey that’s not how it works

as soon as u tell him ur pregnant he gets emotional but once he calms down he just gets really horny again cuz he can’t help it💀 cuz he knows that he did that💀

is an ass kind of guy but doesn’t discriminate on tits

he likes grabbing ur ass,,, like a lot

he knows all the places u like being touched and you know his which makes it fun

also likes to watch u ride him with your hands on his abdomen :/

mostly is on top tho bc he likes having you under him so he can see u better

loves manhandling u tho

like this is a strong word but he loved to fondle you

and,,, and smacking ur ass- literally just grabbing and smacking cuz,,, cuz,,, cuz,,, ur hot and he can’t not let out his sexual frustration on u

like when he gets horny he’s just VERY grabby and touchy like a small child who has never walked into a walmart before and needs to touch literally everything

will kiss you during sex just to hear you moan in his mouth

needs to clear the near vicinity before any of this bc y’all like to be fucking loud

kibum at the door just wanting to pick up the hairbrush he left behind on accident: 🧍

wants you to leave hickeys and scratches on him bc that’s how he knows he did good

plus likes to joke about it when ppl ask him what animal mauled him

reeeaaaallllyyyyy likes mirror sex

ok listen tho

he likes fucking u slow against the counter from behind so you can see too……

he thinks ur so pretty he just wants u to see too

***

that’s it!! this was literally just a shitpost basically, and my taemin drabble will be up later. it was originally supposed to come out today, but some altercations changed that, and i apologize! :( thank you for reading and leave a like or reblog- or follow me on twitter.

#shinee #shinee x reader #kpop fic #shinee headcanons #choi minho #shinee fluff #kpop #shinee fic #minho fluff #shinee smut #kpop fluff #kpop smut

[seiyasabi]

Bulls in the Bronx

(So…. long story short, I’m now a hucow simp. Thanks a lot @/biskywrites and @/dark-side-blog2 for making me this way (ﾉД`) lol, all jokes aside, I wanna suck some tiddy milk from a buff man ;)) Anyways, this is Yandere Hucow(Hubull?) Bokuto x Fem Reader ;0 This fic allows me to flex my farming knowledge lol, bc my grandparents owned ponies and dogs. 

TW: !Noncon!, !dubcon!, creampie!, he hits you twice!, somnophilia!, predator vs prey?, manipulation!, cumflation!, breeding kink!, size kink!, ur a farmhand!, lactation!, tiddie sucking!, Asshole farmer Ushi, etc.. 

Please don’t proceed if any of the above are triggering! Also, sorry if Bokuto is too OOC lol) 

“Bokuto got into the lackweed again,” You can’t suppress the laugh that explodes from your mouth. The idea of the biggest hucow (hubull??) on the ranch freaking out (again), because he’s now dripping milk is hilarious. 

“Where on Earth does he keep finding those damn weeds?” The other farmhand laughs as well, stooping down to fill two buckets with water. 

“I think those grass seeds were cross contaminated, the other hucows also started to lactate a lot more than usual. But, it’s kinda funny that our best breeder is dripping like a heifer,” Chuckling in acknowledgement, you can’t help but feel a pang of pity. Poor Bo, he’s probably really self conscious at the moment. 

“Maybe I should go check on him-” Your coworker almost drops the bucket she’s filling, looking up at you as if you just grew three heads. 

“Why would you do that? Did you forget that he’s going in rut soon?” Frowning, you glance down at the floor in mild shame. 

“Well, yes, but he isn’t supposed to start until next week! Plus, I’m not ovulating right now, so I won’t trigger him,” The other girl thinks for a moment, before nodding slowly. 

“I suppose it’d be fine. If anything, he may calm down if his favourite handler is there,” Nodding, you grab two buckets from the shelf beside you. Squatting down next to your coworker, you place a bucket underneath a faucet, turning the circular handle to the left. A gush of cool water rushes out, quickly filling the plastic pail. Quickly switching it out for the empty one, you wait a few more moments, before turning off the rushing water. Grabbing the handles of the buckets, you lift them whilst standing to your feet, using your legs instead of your back. 

Nodding towards the other girl, you bid her farewell. Turning on your heel, you tromp towards the bull pens. The large red barn is quite a far distance from the shed you were once in, causing you to break out in a light sweat. It doesn’t help that it’s mid spring, causing the farm to be quite warm. 

Setting the buckets down on the dirt ground, you wipe your brow with the back of your hand. Huffing out a deep breath, you quickly move the concrete slab keeping the barn closed away from the sliding door, before shoving it open. The sound of the cowbell on the red and white door handle on the inside clinks noisily, queuing a symphony of deep ‘moos.’ 

Picking up the buckets with bent knees, you hurry inside, relishing the feeling of the barn’s fans on your sweaty skin, “Hey guys, is the barn cool enough for you?” Grumbles and shifting of large bodies are all you get in response, causing you to laugh, “I’ll take that as a yes.”

Gunning it for a certain grey haired bull’s stall, a bright smile makes its way onto your face, “Hey, Koutarou, how’re you feeling?” 

He’s currently laying on his bed of compact hay, tears sliding down his handsome face. His cute ears are droopy, his bell earring not jingling with life like normal. His tears drip between his septum piercing, and drop onto his well defined abdomen, “Not good, (Your Name).” 

With a small gasp, you set down the pails rather harshly, some of the cool liquid sloshing onto the wooden floor. Hurrying towards him, you sit on the prickly ‘mattress,’ “What’s wrong? I heard that you’re lac-” A small sob leaves his lips at your words, causing you to grab his hand reassuringly, “Are the other guys making fun of you? I can go yell at them if you’d like!” 

The buff bull-man sits up, one arm covering his chest self-consciously, “No! They’re not being mean,” He grips your hand almost to the point that it’s painful, “I-it’s just… my chest hurts, real bad.”

Nodding in understanding, you motion towards his covered pecs, “Let me see, Bubs. I’ll see what I can do.”

His face flushes bright red, “But it’s embarrassing!” You shush him sweetly, releasing his hand to coax his arm away from his chest. 

“It’s okay, I won’t make fun of you! I just wanna help you,” After a moment of hesitance, he obeys, revealing his swollen, red nipples. 

The area around his nipples is raised as well, showing just how much his milk is backed up. 

Eyes softening even more, you delicately rub both pecs, “You’re alright, Bubs. This happens to the cows sometimes when we don’t milk them as much as we need to. If you’d like, I can go find a pump!”

“No! I don’t wanna pump!” You jump slightly, and move away from him, only for his hands to trap your own to his chest. More tears gather in his eyes, as he becomes distraught, “I don’t want my milk to go to waste!” 

Taken aback, you nod, although you don’t understand his reasoning, “Kou, why’re you acting like this? You know we don’t get rid of milk, we sell your guys’ milk at the market.” 

He shakes his head, “I don’t want you to sell it. I want you to drink it,” The look of shock on your face is mistaken as disgust, causing him to cry even more, “Do you think I’m weird? Why do you look like that?” Seeing the bull act so sensitive is adorable, but you feel as though you have to comfort him.

“No, no, it’s okay! I’m not weirded out, I’m just surprised. I’ll go get a bucket-”

“No bucket!” Sighing at his weird behaviour, you cock an eyebrow at him. 

“Then how am I supposed to collect it?” A big grin crosses his teary face. 

“Drink from me! I promise I’ll be good!” Shifting in discomfort, an anxious sweat starts to form on your brow. 

“Ahaha, that’s funny, Kou. You know I can’t do that,” More tears well up in his eyes, squeezing your heart painfully, “Don’t look at me like that, Bubs. I don’t think your owner would like me getting so close-” 

“I don’t mind,” Ushijima’s voice booms throughout the barn, scaring the living daylights out of you. Whipping your head around, you make eye contact with the large male, an uncharacteristic smirk on his face, “As long as my star bull is happy, I’m happy.”

Kou releases your hands, only to grab your face, forcing you to look at him, “See! He doesn’t care! Please, (Nickname), please help me! My udders hurt so bad!” 

With Ushijima’s eyes on you, and Koutarou’s sad and pain filled face, you finally relent, “Okay, okay! Don’t freak out, Bubs, I’ll help. You just gotta let me go.” 

He releases you quickly, before shoving your head towards his chest. The jingling of his earring is heard, telling you that his ears are no longer pressed down on the top of his head. You hear heavy footsteps walk away from his stall, probably gathering the bulls to let them graze outside. 

You try to push away from where your head is being smushed, but the bull gives you no leeway, “Why aren’t you drinking?” The male practically whines, as you whack his shoulder lightly. 

“I’m being smothered in between your tiddies, Kou,” You chuckle in slight discomfort, but he finally allows you up. Moving towards his most swollen nipple (the left one), you pinch it between your thumb and forefinger, causing a small stream of milk to come streaming out. 

A small moan leaves the large man’s lips, as he shoves you once again face first into his chest, “Don’t tease, (Nickname), I feel like I’m dying!” A flash of empathy goes through your heart. 

Removing your hand from his nipple, you take a deep breath, and latch yourself onto him.Your chapstick covered lips are soft against his sensitive skin, causing him to keen. When you suckle, a tidal wave of milk bursts into your mouth. Luckily, it doesn’t taste very bad; his milk tastes like vanilla, causing you start to slurp it up like a babe. 

Your one hand kneads his other pec to soothe him, “Fu-fuck, you’re making me feel so good!” You don’t bother trying to say anything, instead, you just suck harder. Your unoccupied hand squeezes his tit that you’re currently nursing on, causing him to pump out more of his yummy milk. 

After a few long moments, you release his nipple. A drop of milk trickles down your chin, which the large bull laughs at. A thick finger wipes off the excess, pushing itself into your mouth. A tender look is in the grey haired man’s eyes, as he kisses your forehead. 

“Thank you, pretty girl. Can you do the other one, please?” Now that he’s no longer in a painfilled state, he’s back to his normal, boyish self. Nodding, you lick your lips, before latching on to his other nipple. He barely chokes back a moan, his hand gripping the back of your head. 

You suck as hard as you can without hurting him, pretending his nipple was a straw to a thick ass milkshake. Between your massaging and sucking, his teat no longer feels as painful as it once did. 

Pulling away, you give him a wry smile, “There, all better. Well, I should pour your water into your trough now,” Standing up with wobbly legs, you move towards the filled buckets. Picking them up one by one, you pour it in with unsteady hands. Why are you so shaky right now? “Well, I should get going now. I hope you feel better later,” You try to walk out of his stall, only to be yanked back into Bokuto’s lap. Both empty pails fall to the ground unceremoniously, clattering loudly through the empty barn. 

“Don’t leave me, Lovely, I need you,” His warm skin against yours feels nice, and you suddenly feel sleepy. 

“Kou, I’m tired. I think-I think I’m gonna take a nap,” He runs his fingers (through your hair/over your scalp), tantalising you into drifting off. 

“That’s alright, (Nickname), I’ll watch after you,” With a muffled ‘Mhm,’ you fall into a deep slumber. 

-

When you awoke, you woke to your body shaking. Brow furrowing, you blearily open your eyes, only to see a tuft of grey hair in between your bent, spread legs. 

His long tongue is currently fucking in and out of your dripping cunt, his thumb rubbing against your clit. 

“Ku-Kou? Wha-“ He looks up immediately, a look of shock on his strong features. 

“I-It’s Not what it looks like! I-I just wanted a taste!” You groggily push at his head, catching his ears slightly, causing a small jingling to sound throughout the empty barn. 

“You didn’t ask, why, why are you-“ He grabs your hand, kissing each knuckle with a slobbering kiss. 

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Let me make you feel good! You taste so good,” You yank your hand back, trying to kick off the hand that currently wrapped around your right thigh. 

“Get off of me! Bokuto, you-you’re doing this without my consent! I thought we were friends!” You shout, pushing at his face harshly. He grabs one of your hands, trying to kiss it, only for your other to clap him upside the face harshly, “Don’t! You’ve already done enough.” 

Kicking him away (even though he’s much larger and stronger than you, meaning he just moved away), you stand to your feet, pulling back up your halfway down jeans and panties. 

Snatching up the buckets previously discarded, you don’t even shoot the crying bull a glance, just turning on your heel, and stomping away. 

Tears of your own drip down your face, humiliation and betrayal weighing down your aching heart. 

Forcefully sliding open the barn doors, you run from it, catching the eye of a certain green haired farmer. 

It seems Bokuto fucked up. 

But that’s okay, when he goes into rut, there’ll be nothing keeping him from breeding you full of his massive calves. 

-

You avoided the bull barn like the plague for the next week. The hucows are very pleasant company. They treat you as if you’re their young, making you feel well loved. 

That is, until Hachi asked you why you’ve been avoiding Bokuto. She’d told you that he hasn’t acted the same, in fact, he’s acted depressed and withdrawn. 

Since then, you’ve stuck with aquatic life. The fish, swans, and ducks don’t give you that much trouble. 

But, when you come back from the pond and fish pools, the farm is ensued with panic. Apparently, Bokuto’s finally gone into rut. 

And, unfortunately for you, he’s on the prowl for you. 

So, when your coworker runs up to you, begging for you to calm him, you turn on your heel, and start walking back towards the pond. They can figure this out themselves, you’re not going to sacrifice yourself to someone who tried to take advantage of you. 

Sadly, that doesn’t work out. 

You’re immediately stopped by Ushijima, his broad form blocking you from advancing forward, “Where do you think you’re going?” His arms are crossed, an angry scowl on his usually handsome features. 

“I forgot something at the pond,” You lie, smoothly, “I’m going to go grab it real quick-” 

“You’ll do nothing of the sort,” His strong voice booms, “What you’re going to do, is march yourself into the barn, and make my prized bull happy.” 

Your own scowl forms on your pretty face, “I will do nothing of the sort. Interspecies sex is illegal! You can fire me for all I care, I’m not going in there!” You try to move around his large form, only to be manhandled into a chokehold.

His left arm is wrapped around your neck, your back to his chest, and your face being held in a large hand, “Interspecies sex is legal when a human and hybrid are mates,” He hisses through gritted teeth, and you struggle in his hold, “If you don’t go in there, I’ll drag you in.” 

“Fuck you,” You spit, “I’ll fucking castrate you!” You kick backwards, landing a solid hit on the large man’s groin. With a loud yell, you’re let go, allowing you to run towards the farm’s parking area. Pulling your truck’s keys from your pocket, you haul ass, not bothering to look behind you. 

The barns and sheds fly past you, as you run through the open field leading to the car park. You suddenly hear loud footsteps follow after you, and you assume that it’s Ushijima, that is, until you hear them, “(Nickname)! (Nickname), where are you going? Why are you running away from me?” Bokuto’s voice rings out at top volume, hurting your ears. His voice a lot more gravely than before, and without looking at him, you know that he most likely looks crazed. 

You don’t respond, trying to pick up the pace. You click the unlock button one time, only unlocking the driver’s side door. Because you had a head start, you cleared the field in less than three seconds, allowing you to hop into your truck, and lock the doors. Shoving the key into the ignition, all whilst buckling your seatbelt, you press on the brake, and turn it, only to hear the spluttering of your failing ignition, “Come on! Don’t do this-” Bokuto slams into the driver’s side door at top speed, rocking your large vehicle harshly. His hands and face are pressed against the window, his expression looking like that of a kicked puppy. You then notice the fact that the buff male is completely naked, his impossibly large cock bobbing against his toned stomach. 

“Why are you trying to leave? I need you so badly, pretty-pretty. Why don’t you open the door, and we can figure this out? I promise I’ll make you feel good, after all, us bulls pride ourselves in taking care of our mates,” You cringe in disgust, not bothering to answer him. Instead, you continue to fiddle with your ignition, muttering expletives under your breath. His large hands start to beat on your driver-side window, trying to gain your attention, “(Nickname), come out already! Ushi already cut your fuel line, so you’re not going anywhere! Come on, I just wanna make you feel good-”

It was your turn to cut him off, “Shut up! We aren’t friends anymore, Bokuto, much less lovers! Just leave me the fuck alone! I’m sure many of the cows would love to help you through your rut, why can’t you just ask them?” Tears of frustration dot your eyelashes, as you pop open your glove box and search for your phone. Catching sight of the black cased (phone type), you snatch it from its confines with a loud ‘Aha,’ “Don’t make me call the Farmer’s Union, Bokuto. I’ll report you and Ushijima for-”

“You won’t! You love me too much!” His frantic words raise in volume, as he hit the glass even harder than before, “You wouldn’t put me down! Come on, (Nickname), why won’t you call me ‘Bubs’ anymore? I love you!” You swipe open your phone, and go to the contacts. Pulling up the Farmer’s Union phone number, you go to press ‘call,’ only for the shattering of glass to halt you. 

You scream in both fear and shock, throwing up your hands to protect your face. This, in turn, causes you to drop your phone. In this time, Bokuto is able to grab you by your arms, and drag you towards the broken window. Your seatbelt keeps you in place, causing him to pull you even harder, and making you scream in pain. 

You use your arm to whack his against the broken glass on your truck’s window area. He releases you in a moment of pain, allowing you to unbuckle yourself, and throw yourself to the passenger side. Once there, you unlock the door, and bolt towards the road. 

“(Your Name), come back here! Stop being so difficult!” You pay him no mind, a few meters away from the busy road. Noticing a car speeding towards the area you’re running to, you push yourself even harder, trying to throw yourself into the road. Unfortunately, you’re grabbed by two buff arms that encircle your waist. They use all of their strength to smash you into their chest from behind, knocking the air from your lungs, “Are you crazy? You could’ve been hurt!” You thrash and try to bite at him, causing Bokuto to backhand you across the face, “Now look what you made me do! If you’d been good, I wouldn’t have had to do that!”

To be completely honest, you’re in shock. Bokuto has never raised a hand at you, and that slap wasn’t a warning tap. No, that was him using a good majority of his strength, causing your cheek to throb painfully. 

You continue to thrash and curse after freezing for a moment, drawing the eyes of concerned coworkers, “Let go of me! What the fuck is wrong with you? Put me down!” You try to kick him in the junk, only to kick him on the inside of his thigh. In retaliation, he backhands you again, this time on the other cheek. Gasps and whispers are heard from those around you, drawing the large hucow’s eyes. 

“There’s nothing to see here, guys! Just my mate making a scene,” He shakes you a bit to shut you up, causing you to become disoriented. The farmhands and other hybrids look like they’re about to step in, only for Ushijima himself to show up. 

“What Bokuto said is correct,” His harsh gaze is on you, his hand gripping his dick, “She’s just making a scene. Let them through.”

They reluctantly go back to their business, as Koutarou guns it to the empty bull barn. Ushijima only watches as you’re dragged to the large building, as tears drip down your face in fear, and his fist at his side clenches in fury.

Stomping into the barn, Bokuto makes quick work of getting to his stall. Once inside, he tosses you on the hay mattress, and straddles your waist. With pawing hands, he rips your t-shirt and jeans off of you, leaving you in your bra and underwear, along with your boots and socks. Yanking off your boots, be tossed them out of his ‘room,’ as you try to throw punches at his muscular chest. He grunts, but doesn’t stop. 

With beefy fingers, he yanks off your bra, ripping it in two. Your tits jiggle at his harsh movements, making him lick his lips in enjoyment. He then rips off your cotton panties, exposing your cunny to his hungry eyes. 

“You’re beautiful, pretty-pretty. I can’t wait to see you stuffed with my calves,” You shake your head no rapidly, pushing his hands away from where they rest on your hips. 

“No! Stop it, Bokuto! I thought we were friends!” He tightens his grip on your pelvis, forcing your legs open. 

“That’s Not my name, (Nickname), you know that. Now, you know that I’m way more than just your friend-I’m your mate, and you know that I’ll provide for you and our calves,” With grubby fingers, he rubs at your clit, trying to draw a good reaction from you.

You squirm in response, trying to wriggle out of his one handed grip. You shove at his chest, but he remains unmoved, choosing to press down harder than before, “Stop it! Let me go!” 

He inserts his middle finger into your moist cunny, forcing it in and out. You try to kick him in the head only for him to catch your leg with the hand that previously held your hip, “If you wanted me to eat you out that bad, you should’ve just said so, pretty girl,” Before you can refuse, he throws your legs over his shoulders, and dives in. 

His long tongue fucks in and out of your hole, one of his thumbs rubbing your clit. A loud whine escapes your throat before you can stop it, making you feel a wave of disgust for yourself. Bokuto shouldn’t be making you feel good, he’s assaulting you, after all. 

But, when his tongue brushed against your g-spot, you can’t help but convulse in pleasure. Thighs quaking, you try to stop yourself from cumming. 

“St-stop! I’m, I’m gonna-“ He stops before you can cum, instead, pushing your hips down to where his cock lays against his abs. Forcing the bulbous head against your tiny hole, he pushes harshly, trying to fuck into you like an animal, “No! No! You’re too big! You’re going to tear my-“ With one powerful thrust, he forces his way inside, and you can’t help but scream. 

Tears drip down your face at the feeling, your pussy feeling like it’s been ripped open. Bokuto grabs your head, and forces it against his chest, practically making you take one of his pink nipples into your mouth. You’re immediately met with the taste of his vanilla milk, drinking it up as the hucow starts to buck into you at a lightning fast pace. 

Your teeth bite down on his nipple, but instead of being angry, he just moans in lust, “Yes! Yes, pretty girl, you’re taking me so well!” 

His hand that isn’t cradling your head goes to your tummy, feeling his huge length moving underneath your skin. He presses down a bit, causing another wanton moan to leave to both of you. With this thought in mind, he picks up the pace, practically fucking you into unconsciousness. 

Eyes rolling back, your ruined cunny gushed pathetically, coating you and the bull with your juices, “(Nickname), you’re so pretty when you cum,” He continues his breakneck pace, getting close to orgasm himself, “I’m gonna fill you up so good, that you’ll be dripping with my fun for days! Your little womb will be bloated with my fertile cum!” 

You try to speak, but you can’t, just continuing to suck his yummy milk from his teat. Walls fluttering with another orgasm, you feel yourself clamping down on his enormous cock. 

With one last mighty thrust, he seats himself fully inside of you, cumming directly against your unprotected cervix. A muffled scream erupts from your chest, as you feel your womb expand with copious amounts of beeile cum. Releasing his nipple, you throw your head back, a loud cry echoes throughout the barn, as you squirt once more around his cock. 

Now completely filled to the brim, you pass out from the trauma. Entirely exhausted, Koutarou grins down at your bloated form. He rubs your tummy like a Buddha statue, kissing it tenderly. 

“You’ll be a good Mommy, I’m sure of it,” he then trails his hand up your abdomen, groping your right tit, “You’ll look so pretty all milky and filled with my calves.” 

The sound of a throat clearing gains Bokuto’s attention, as he practically throws his naked body over yours. A loud ‘moo’ of warning escapes his chest, even when he notices that the person is just Ushijima. 

“I see that she mates with you well,” His eyes trail over your sleeping face, not straying downwards, “I hope this means that you’ll enter more shows.” 

Bo smiles, “Yes. Now I need to show off, so my mate thinks I’m an eligible male.” 

Nodding, Ushijima turns on his heal, making his way to leave the barn, “I hope your children take after you in strength. (Your Name) is a lot prettier than you are, so maybe they’ll be pleasing to the eye as well.” 

Snorting, the grey haired man’s ears twitch, jingling throughout the room, “You bet she is. She’s perfect.” 

#yandere bokuto #bokuto koutarou #yandere haikyuu #yandere haikyuu imagines #yandere haikyuu x reader #yandere koutarou #bokuto x reader #bokuto imagines #bokuto haikyuu #hybrid au #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu au

[m1tsur1love]

Hashira's reaction when you flirt with them

This was inspired by my friend and I's conversation last night.

Tengen uzui

This man was just breathing

He was leaning againts the tree and doing nothing

Then he felt a pair of eyes on him

Only to look over and sew you intensely staring at his arms

🤔

You noticed he caught you staring so you're just like

🧍‍♀️...hey

He beckones you over with that hand motion you know (?)

And that's when your soul left your body

But you weren't going to make a fool out of yourself so you started flirting with him when he asked if his arms had caught your attention

He is takem back

He thought you were shy

And he thought he was going to enjoy teasing you and see you flustered

But nah

Either way he is ready

He started flirting back

Some compliments here and there and some small talk

He asked you to be his 4th wife

But before you could answer both of you were hit by apples

Obanai was at the tree sleeping but y'all woke him up

😔

Shinobu Kocho

This most likely happened when you were helping at the butterfly estate

You've liked Lady Kocho for a while

Just cuz who wouldn't

She is amazing

But obv you couldn't flirt with her

So one day

You were helping out at the Butterfly Estate like usually

And shinobu happened to be there

Cue you beign a flustered mess

At some point

Tanjiro was complimenting Kanao

And shinobu was next to you

Watching them

Smiling

"Ara ara,kanao sure can't take compliments"

You just kinda nodded

But somehow you were confident that day

So you just

"Lady Kocho,you sure are amazing also"

A 30 second pause

You thought you messed up

But it turns out Shinobu can't take compliments either

Or mabye it's just because of you

So she turns towards you

Hums and smiles

And she is gone

Next time you see her she is more friendly (?) around you

So you compliment her again

She smiles and pats your head

KSBSIWKWOWJEHIEIW82828WHWN&#^@€×£×&

Anyways

You keep complimenting her

And slowly but surely

She returns them

So there are just compliments back and forth

Until one day

Zeintsu was arguing with Tanjiro about Nezuko

And he blurts out

"YOU SEEM FRIENDLY WITH KANAO,INSOKUE IS A DIFFERENT BREED AND EVEN Y/N-SAN AND LADY KOCHO ARE TOGETHER AND FLIRT ALL DAY"

Que both you and shinobu blushing furiously

Rengoku Kyojiro

Oh god

You flirted with this man

Confident

Thinking you were going to get a good respond

His response?

"WAHHH THAT'S SO NICE OF YOU TO ENCOURAGE YOUR COMRADES"

You almost hit him

But you didn't

So you tried again and same thing happened

But you didn't give up though

Rengoku though

He was sad

Why?

Well

He noticed you didn't "encourage" the other hashiras

So he thought you must want him to do better

And

That he wasn't doing welland should train more

So one day he pulled you aside

And asked

"Do you think im doing bad as a hashira?"

You were taken back

One: how did he come to that conclusion

Two: he had a quiet and sad voice

So you obviously said

No

And told him how great and how much of an amazing hashira he is

Then he asked

"Then why do you only encourage me?"

"Isn't because you think im doing bad?"

And you're like

????

And then it hit you

Encouraging = flirting

For him.

So you burst out laughing

Rolling on the floor

Wheezing.

And rengoku got sadder

He thought you would understand and not laugh

He trusted you and the little warming feeling he felt around you was not helping

Noticing his sad expression

You stop laughing and hug him

He hesitantly hugs you back

But he is like

??

So you explain it to him

And his face is like

:0

And then after that day he also "encourages" you

Mitsuri kanroji

My beloved

All the hashiras were hanging out

So ofc you were also there

Mitsuri spotted you and ran to hug you

Like she did with everyone

So you hug her back

But she smelled so nice

She smelled like sakura mochi

So you noticing said

"Omg,mitsuri-san you smell so nice"

Mitsuri is blushing

HARD

So she mutters a quiet thankye and runs away squealing towards tengen and rengoku

So you're standing there like

Ok?

Next day there was a hashira meeting and mitsuri was avoiding you

So you were worried you said smth wrong last night

(Dw she just likes you and can't approach you)

So you decided to let her be bcs you didn't know what to do

After a while

She approaches you

And you're HAPPY

And seeing you happy

Made mitsuri HAPPY

So she invites you to her house to eat sakura mochi with her

And who are you to say no

You make the way to her house and she is explaining how he hair is pink and green

And you're listening to her like

:0 that's so cool

And then you compliment her hair and she just squeals and grabs your hand running to her house

Then she serves the sakura mochi and you guys eat after you arrived

And she confesses

And you confess

And both of you are now partners

I did this in 2 hours of sleep so it's a bit low quality ngl but I'll try more next time <3

#demon slayer #kny hashira #kny mitsuri #mitsuri kanjori #mitsuri kanroji x reader #shinobu kocho #shinobu #shinobu kocho x reader #tengen uzui #tengen uzui kny #tengen uzui x reader #kny rengoku #rengoku x reader #rengoku kyojuro fluff

[vetrubius]

UKAIXFEMREADER!

Ukai responding to you saying  "c*m inside me"

Word Count: 1,408

A/N: hEMLOI moi babies, I got an amazing response on DaichixFemReader, I’m so glad so I kinddddd of decided to spice it up for Ukai. I, in no way support toxic relationships. And I wrote it extra long so y’all can feel extra ;)) i haven't proof read this bc its 4 am and im max tired, so i apologise in advance. ALSO DARK ACADEMIA PERSONNA IS JUST SO 😩

Warnings: SMUT, ANGST, toxic relationships, crying, trauma, smoking, alcohol, slight fluff (interact only if you’re 18+), breeding kink

It was like every other afternoon, you by the balcony watching the rain fall on the lane below. Single men with their cigarettes in hands, couples with their arms intertwined under the same umbrella, the cigarette shop where a group of high school boys hung around. The balcony had always been your safe space. It was one of the ways you’d met Keinshin Ukai. 

 You two had accidentally made an eye contact. You, on your balcony and him, near the shop. He’d adored you the second he’d laid his eyes on you; draped in a white lace tunic and grey shorts which reached your knees. The darkest shade of lipstick which you wore with your hair down, made you look as if you were an angel which arrived right in front of him. 

Since then, he’d be there promptly at 7 pm and you at the balcony having many unspoken conversations between the two of you.

You’d run out of cigarettes one morning while you were on your way to your publishing house.You’d always been an avid reader with bottomless thirst for content. It was a good day, you had a meeting with the board head. After putting on a jacket on your mauve camisole, you’d run across the cigarette shop to find your favourites. Had it not been that morning, your numbers would never have been exchanged and future dates wouldn’t have been made for the same evening. 

-----flashback-----

The room was heavy with the smell of cigarettes and weed as you popped another bottle of wine.

 “I did not take you to be a reader,” Ukai said, taking a puff and keenly maintaining eye contact. 

“And I sir, did not take you for a shopkeeper AND a coach” you said,  smirking and pouring in  his empty glass.

“Well, I do love those boys plus that teacher is very...persuasive?,” he said with a slight cringe and looking u0p. “Don’t get me wrong, he’s very amazing and managed to land us a match with a lot of great teams but he’s very weird, but a good kinda weird you know?”.

 Nah you didn’t know. You were too busy admiring him. Of course you were a little young for him but he was too attractive for his age. The blonde with his brown sideburns and three piercings. He looked so sinful. 

It dawned on him how you’d been staring at him. And he’d sensed the high tension in the room that was enough to devour the two of you. And that’s when he leaned in slightly, holding the side of your face in your hand. “I know you’ve been wanting me sweetheart. I do too,” he said  brushing his lips with yours. “And I think I may fall in love with you this way. The way you’re in my hands right now makes me feel like I'm on an ecstasy high.” 

Your lips met and kissed you like it was the last time he was gonna kiss you. Like you were Persephone in the arms of Hades and you were gonna fly away. 

You somehow knew. You knew this was it. You were gonna fall so hard for this man. This high felt like you’d finally reached what you wanted and you realised it was gonna hurt you if he ever left. 

-----Present-----

“BUT I’M TIRED OF NOT SEEING YOU FOR SO MANY DAYS, JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE GOING WITH THE KIDS DOESN’T MEAN YOU DON’T SEE ME! 

AM THEY MORE IMPORTANT THAN I AM?” a sludge of tears and mascara flowing down your face with your bra strap sliding off your arm. It had been too frustrating for you. You’d been missing him to the point you’d wear his remaining scent. You’d stayed up nights wishing you’d hear the door unlock. It was too painful for you.And he refused to understand that. 

“You’re fucking overreacting. I’m leaving. I’ll come home after a few days.” he said  extinguishing his cigarette on the ivory ashtray you got for his 29th birthday and picking his gym bag up. 

“I HOPE YOU NEVER FUCKING COME BACK-” you shouted as he headed for the door. “I think…….. this is it. We’re done.” You said  slipping on the floor in a puddle of sobs. This was toxic. You had to leave him. But it was so heavy for you. You could never do that. He was your soulmate after all. 

You hear the door shut. 

Your fragile heart splits into pieces. Is that it? This is how we end? Your thoughts kept running as fast as a marathon, too fast for you to process. 

“It’s fine. I don’t need him anyway. You say  turning the lights off of the bathroom and slipping in the empty bathtub and shutting your eyes and being enveloped by sleep. 

.

.

.

You felt a hand pat on your head and a bright light in front of you. “Hey sweetheart…”

It didn’t even take a second for you to go on defensive mode and whack his hand off you.

“I miss you. I know what I do is wrong. I know I don’t give you time. I know how much this means to you. I’m sorry. Just a little  more, okay? Then I’ll be all yours and I’ll be proud to call the boys ours. I love you, Y/N. I can’t imagine my life witho-”

That’s all it takes for him everytime. Just opening his stupid mouth and you’re off to sprint to his arms. Fucking moron. 

“I still hate you” you said between the kisses and pulling his hoodie off. You wanted him. That’s all you cared about. You wanted to hurt him but no matter what, you couldn’t. “I hate that you make me feel this way. But I love you more and this is your last chance. Make me happy or I leave.”

He whooped you up in his arms and carried you to the bed “And why would I let you leave? You’re mine.” He said  keeping you and hovering on top of you with his biceps bulging. Amd slowly kissing your face, jaw and neck

“You’re the greatest thing that has happened to me, I’ll never let you go Y/N” Ukai said as his lips were dangerously close to your cleavage. 

He spent a good 30 minutes between your thighs like a lapdog. Licking up any blessing you had to offer. His eye contact never breaking, his fingers working their ways through your pussy, his tongue overstimulating your clit. “I know you like this, my love. It’s been twice in 35 minutes I think my dick needs a little bit of it too.” He said getting up and unbuckling himself. Your eyes now watery with the overstimulation and throat dried up. 

“I want a baby….I want a reason for you to come home to if not me.” You said rasply. 

‘What do you mean, sweets? Can you elaborate on the making baby part?”

“I want you to come inside me. Tonight.” 

He grabbed your thighs mercilessly and shoved himself inside. “Whatever she wants, she gets. I’m gonna fuck you until you’re dripping and then make sure that the mini us knows how much I love you and you’re worth coming home to both of you.” he whispered in your ear. 

He gave you a few seconds to adjust to him inside you. “M-mmmoveEE PLEASE” you whined against his shoulder. Without losing a single second, you felt your body split. You knew he’d been abstaining from sex. But this feeling was so overwhelming to both of you. 

The air was filled with moans, squelches and the mix of smell of cigarettes and lavender. You felt him speed up. Missionary had always been a weak spot for Keishin. Your mouth drooling over your cheeks, your eyes half shut, your body limping and the way your boobs bounced under you. it has always been a turn on for him. 

You felt him speed up. His name falling out of your mouth as you were blinded by the speed he was going at. “I….I’M COMING BABE” you grind your thighs through as his walls white wash you inside. 

He climbed off of you to adore your cunt stuffed with his cream, dripping on the white sheet with a light brown floral pattern. 

“I love you, Y/N. Don’t ever think I don’t wanna come home and not see you. You’re the only thing I have.”

series masterlist

#ukai smut #ukai x reader #haikyuu ukai #ukai scenario #haikyuu smut #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x reader #nishinoya smut #kageyama smut #asahi smut #tanaka smut #kiyoko smut #karasuno smut #ukai angst #haikyuu angst #angst #haikyuu fluff #ukai fluff

[thepoodlepack]

What's wrong with goldenpoodles? I'm genuinely curious because almost all of my dogs are mixed breeds and behave fine. So I'm curious if there's something else I'm missing

jeez this feels like bait but u kno what, you got me

alright, so it goes like this. the doodle really began with a guy in australia being like i need the temperament of a lab for a guide dog but these ppl are allergic to dogs, so i need a poodle bc they have hair, not fur. so he bred em together. years later he’s like damn that was a mistake.

now, why, exactly? alright so first of all he only needed that mix bc labs on average tend to adapt better to situations that are largely exclusive to service dog work than poodles do. i can go into what this means at a later date, but that’s basically how it is. but either way, people jumped on this creation and it kinda spiraled out of control. soon, poodles were being bred by everyone and every breed. suddenly, they were a marketing scam more then they were a dog breed.

oh theyre hypoallergenic! all of them, all the time cause zero allergies! look theyre so much better than poodles! theyre friendly and easy to train, not like poodles of course, just like labs! they’re better than labs bc none of them shed, ever! they’re super healthy bc breeding labs and poodles together wipes out all their health problems, of course!

lies, lies lies. the aussie guy, whose name i’m not going to look up bc i’m lazy but who you can find if you google creator of doodles, straight up says that even the first litter(s) of labradoodles he bred had puppies that the people he bred them for were allergic to. he very carefully tested the litter and the reaction the person had before placing a puppy that was not going to hurt them.

think of the punnet squares we all learned about in 5th grade science class. you draw the squares and one parent has two fur genes and the other parent has two hair genes and what do you get? well if you have four puppies, one might have hairhair and the next one might have hairfur and the next one might have furhair and the next one might have furfur. and so guess what? only hairhair pup is going to be the best choice for allergic people. additionally, you can see why the non-shedding thing can be bullshit, and that in particular is also a guessing game. you may be able to test allergy sufferers against the pups, but that does not necessarily mean they won’t shed. hairfur, for example, may be a good choice for some allergic people, but perhaps they’ve got just enough fur to shed anyway. also, lets look at salukis (and frankly, most long-haired sighthounds). salukis are still considered dogs with fur, not hair. they also still shed, even though it’s just a little. and yet they’re still considered good for allergy sufferers.

(ps poodles do actually shed. but they shed like humans shed. your hair comes out, doesn’t it? like, esp folks with long hair, aren’t people always complaining how you clog the shower drain? yeah, like that. ALSO obviously the situation is more complicated then super simple punnet squares and as an ex-groomer i have something to say about doodle coats but i’m going to save that for later, put a pin in it.)

oh and wait a hot minute there. i said best choice, didn’t i, not hypoallergenic. well, that’s because no dog is hypoallergenic. poodles, and a few other dog breeds, they have hair, like we do. but the thing is both humans and breeds with hair still produce the dander, though they’re different kinds. breeds with hair happen to produce the least amount possible that dogs can produce, which is why they’re a better choice for allergy sufferers, but that’s still not a guarantee. my roommate Dakota is allergic to dogs. if i don’t wash my dogs for an extended period of time (which has never happened, ever, in my life, idk what ur talking about), thus giving the chance for the dander my dogs still produce, he will have a very, very mild reaction when touching them. it can be countered by him washing his hands after touching them and also me just giving them a fucking bath, i need to stop forgetting, but still, there you go. ALSO people might not be allergic to dogs bc of their dander. they might be allergic to the saliva of dogs, which poodles or any other breed with hair still produces about the same as other dogs. so, yeah, not hypoallergenic, not at all.

the people who taut their hypoallergenic dogs for sale largely don’t do the testing required to check if they’re actually providing a dog to someone who won’t react to it. not acceptable at all.

so, labs are friendly and easy to train right? not at all like poodles, right? no. absolutely incorrect. some labs are friendly and easy to train. some labs, a lot of them when they’re puppies, are nightmare fuel. personally, i have a theory that everyone’s vision of labs in their heads are either a) service dogs or b) those old labs who are slightly pudgy (or morbidly obsess, which is a different topic) and who are graying in the face and just want to lounge around because they’re seniors now. alright, so here’s why thats bad. labs are a working breed. a retrieving breed. they’re supposed to be bulky and strong and driven. service dogs are highly trained, to a point that most pet dogs will never see, and if you see them with their actual disabled handler, they’ll probably be around 2.5 yrs of age and out of their most wild days. old labs are well. old. sleepy. maybe a bit achey. and well out of their most wild days. oh, and it’s the same type of thing with goldens by the way, the other most popular doodle type. poodles are also easy to train, especially if their parents have a decent temperament. they’re all about equal if you actually start training them when they’re puppies and just pay for some training classes, like everyone should. in the puppy classes i’m in right now, Euphoria is leaps and bounds ahead of doodles, goldens, and labs that are her age or older. I train her properly and she’s got amazing parents. that’s it, that’s the trick. not breed, not necessarily, and def not in this case.

I am once again going to say that labs and goldens are more often used as service dogs than poodles because of their adaptability, but it’s the ability to adapt to situations that most pet dogs will never have to worry about.

jeez this is a long post. i’ve still got more to cover too. alright, on to super healthy, or “hybrid vigor” as the nerds call it. uhh, it’s bullshit. thank u for ur time.

okay, but actually why on gods green earth would breeding two completely different breeds with little to no research make them super healthy? now i want to preface this with i’m (generally) pro-outcross projects. Euphoria’s dad is half mini poodle and half standard poodle, which isn’t technically an outcross bc all the variations are of the same breed, but if we’re going by genetic diversity alone minis and standards are different enough to actually be different breeds.

so, to be clear, outcrosses, given the proper thought and planning: good, results in healthier dogs (see: lua dals). randomly breeding two very different breeds together with no planning other than to sell the puppies to randos who won’t continue the outcross: bad. especially when you’re doing it to cash in and don’t health test at all, or don’t health test the major health problems with both breeds (if you’re doing an f2 breeding or anything like that). no the poodle’s health problems don’t get canceled out by the goldens or labs or whatever the other party’s health problems are, and vice versa. and yeah, i’ve looked at a lot of doodle breeder’s websites and yeah, most of them don’t health test at all, or at least don’t health test properly. do you know i own one doodle and currently live with another? yeah, i got them both from breeders and do you know how much health testing their parents got? if your answer is none, good job, you’ve been paying attention. in my defense, i was like 13, i didn’t know what i was doing.

alright, so those are the big points. this is kinda gonna be just... a mix of my other complaints. here we go, hope you’re ready for more. argument the first: i feel like it’s pretty disrespectful to reputable breeders. now, i actually have two reasons why that is. reason one: most reputable poodle breeders don’t want their breeding stock bred with other breeds, for various reasons. i’ve even met a few who used to be okay with it and then as the doodle scam got bigger and more out of control, they stopped being okay with it, even to the breeders who they had been fine with it in the past. that means a lot of doodle breeders out there have their breeding stock because they scammed poodle breeders into giving them pet quality, not breeding quality, dogs or because they’re getting their stock from non-reputable breeders. i also feel it’s disrespectful to breeders who are actually trying to create new breeds. quite frankly, a breed with the size, strength, and adaptability of a lab or golden that doesn’t shed and that has the train-ability of a poodle, lab, or golden sounds pretty interesting to me. did you know you can actually make that breed? and it wouldn’t be a cross with unpredictable... well, everything. it would actually be a true dog breed.

Look at Silken Windhounds and Biewer Terriers who began both development in the 1980s. Biewer Terriers were recognized by the AKC this year, and Silken Windhounds still haven’t been. And yeah, that’s the problem isn’t it? Making a real new breed takes a lot of time, planning, and care. People would rather just cash in. I think it’s sad and I think it’s disrespectful to the breeders who do work so hard to make actual new breeds.

and finally, unpin being an ex-groomer goddamnit. guess what? doodles are awful to groom! they’re terrible on the grooming tables because people want to have in both ways: they want a dog that doesnt shed at all and they want a dog who doesn’t need to be groomed. well guess what, that dog doesn’t exist and you can have it only one way. and also, bring back the goddamn punnet squares because a lot of doodles have awful coats. if you have hairfur and furhair over there, guess what, their coat fucking sucks bc it’s not meant to be like that. it wants to mat bc hair but also it wants the mats to slide out bc short-ish fur but its too thick for the mats to slide out bc thick hair. and yes its more complicated then this and that means its often more awful then this. its awful, it makes me want to cry. and maybe it’s slightly easier to get away with it with a shorthaired dog like a lab, or, you know what, even a golden, okay, even a slightly long haired dog like a golden but people are doodling akitas? border collies? bernese fucking mountain dogs? i am crying. i am crying right now as i type this.

lets do a sum up to this disaster of a post. look, i don’t go out there attacking or yelling at every doodle or every doodle owner i see, alright? or any of them really. i might engage in conversation to one that’s interested, but that’s it. i love my doodly Isis, okay? shes tiny and she’s adorable and I love her more than life and i will never, ever get another doodle. i don’t like the way they’ve gotten so prolific, i don’t like the reasons they’re now widespread, and i don’t like almost all of the people that create them, including the ones i’ve literally given my (parents) money to in the past. i wish they were better but i just cannot approve of them, especially not in the environment they exist in now. that said, i do support them in their original use case as assistance dogs, and i do not care about them if they’re shelter dogs.

#long post #anti doodle #text #my post #yes this took me like an hour #yes i do hate myself for it #Anonymous #oh anon im being grumpy mostly for comedy thats only funny to me #you're fine as long as you werent trying to bait me

[seijorhi]

asks :)

hhhh y’all got me cryin over here over your The Final Girl responses 😭 💕

holy shit so i. so i have notifs on and i usually save them all for night so i can go through them and have all my fics to read at night, right? everytime you post i drop whatever i’m doing and immediately start reading and you NEVER disappoint. that slasher fic is AMAZING. your writing style is so suspenseful and it really gets you into what you’re reading and i’m always so excited with your work. amazing job as always !!

sdfgyhgfghjk it was my first time trying to write like proper horror and i was so scared that it was just gonna fall flat or just not be that tense?? so thank you!! i’m really glad you liked it :)

RHI BBY!! PHENOMENAL work as always. the chase? the build up? the faint sense of hope the reader feels for a successful escape only for her to be quite literally shoved back into the devil’s grasp (also the fact that she’s going to give birth to a killer’s child bdishsjsh its a hopeless situation really), and let’s not get started on that closing line. my GOD i got absolute chills. this genre was literally MADE for you holy shit, thank you for sharing your talent ❤️🐦

🥺 bby I’ve missed you!! i spent a long time debating about whether i’d add the pregnancy thing or not, but i’m so glad i did, because it just adds to the awfulness of it all i think, and the reader’s desperation. but thank you sm!! i’ve decided that writing violent psychopaths with soft spots for their darlings is now my fave thing haha

OH MY GOD THE FINAL GIRL IS INCREDIBLE RHI!! I have to ask, did they stumble upon her at the campsite by chance? or was it their goal from the beginning to get her, her poor friends just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time (i think the latter was implied but just wondering!!) also, who’s the baby daddy 👀👀

oh, they definitely knew that the reader and her friends were camping in their hunting grounds, and probably spent a day or so just watching from a distance, waiting - that’s how they knew that the reader was hiding after they’d killed the others. it just so happened to be bad luck that the reader made an distinct impression on the three in that time, and kind of sealed her own fate without even realising it.

as far as the baby daddy goes - i haven’t decided. it’s a one in three chance i suppose, pick your favourite it’s not like it really matters, they’re just gonna keep breeding you until you give ‘em each what they want 👀

hi!! i think the pregnancy aspect of your story is super fascinating bc it’s sort of a double edged sword. on one end, the pregnancy ties her to them, but on the other, the reader could use it to her advantage. threaten to kill or hurt the baby inside of her if they try to do something, maybe that’s why she was protective over it. not that they won’t just a fuck another one into her

this!! very much this!! the reader’s actually kinda torn over the baby - on the one hand she knows it’s innocent, it didn’t ask to be born and for better or worse it is her child - but it’s also theirs, and she’s terrified of what they’ll do - and you’re right, even if she lost/got rid of that one, they have absolutely no issues in knocking her up again, regardless of what she wants

will they be nice to the baby once they’re born 😰

define ‘nice’👀

haha, i’m kidding. they’re not gonna outright hurt it, they kinda have the whole ‘family’ fantasy thing going on, with the reader being barefoot and pregnant, keeping them happy and sated, and when the kids are old enough they’ll get to out hunting with their dads and it’ll be a real fucked up family bonding.

I was thinking abt yandere pairs in Haikyuu and I know there are the more canon-ish pairs like Bokuaka or Iwaoi but I was wondering what your opinion would be on Osamu & Suna sharing a darling?

ooh - I could definitely get behind a Suna/Osamu x reader pairing! 

Omg I loved the slasher fic it was absolutely amazing! Like I’ve read it 3 times already lol. The fear and anticipation and the utter craziness are phenomenal. Question! Akaashi says abt Bo and Kuroo not minding if they get started w/o them. Does this mean they planned from the beginning to abduct the reader? before they killed everyone else? Or did Akaashi just decide? Like how long they knew about the reader before things went down, and if the friends would’ve been spared if she wasn’t there?

so i kinda touched on it above, but they were watching the reader and her friends for a few days and the plan was always (or at least after she caught their attention in all the wrong ways) to leave her alive while killing the others. her friends were always going to die - that much was set in stone the moment they decided to make camp in the woods. but ahhh thank you so much!! you’re very sweet, bby!

RHI! Final Girl? Amazing. Exquisite. 10000/10 👌😫 I was on the edge of my seat the entire time! There’s something about the way you write that just makes me feel the story, ya’ know? God, feral killer Bokuto and teasing, merciless Kuroo were TERRIFYING but cold, calculated Akaashi made my heart level elevate 😰 (all in a very good way I assure you) But can I ask if the trio had been planning that for awhile? Did they see you somewhere and develop a crush? (How did Kuroo and Bokuto react when they came back and saw Akaashi and reader “getting started” without them? 🥵) Thanks for making my Halloween! 🧡

💕💕💕 thank you!!! you guys are being so nice about this fic!!

but it’s kind of funny, because akaashi definitely knew that kuroo and bokuto would both be pissed off to come back and see him and the reader having ‘fun’ without them, but they’re not there to stop him and akaashi low key enjoys winding them up. plus, he wants to be the first to taste her, and he knows bo and kuroo are both selfish and possessive, so he’ll take any opportunity/head start he can get haha. 

RHIIII OML ASDFGHJKL I THINK I MIGHT DIE. That was insanely beautiful! Terrifying but beautiful. *incoherent screaming* YOU'RE DOING GREAAAAT!! YOU'RE ONE AMAZING PERSON!! HERE TAKE ALL MY LOVEEE 💕💕💕💕💕

SDFGHJKHGHJK BBY THANK YOUUUUUU!! you’re gonna make me melt if y’all keep being so damn sweet 😭 ily!!

BRO IN FINAL GIRL WHEN YOU PUT THAT PLOT TWIST I WAS SHAKING ITS SO GOOD

i am a huge sucker for plot twists, i’m glad you liked this one haha

Hi Rhi, just dropping by. Hope you're doing great 😊 Ilysm and take care of yourself 💕💕💕

ily2 bby!! i hope you’re having a good day!

Lol I am shamelessly obsessed with your blog. I saw someone send you an ask saying to not feel self conscious about your smut writing and I agree!! Your stories, no matter how soon the smut starts, are absolutely incredible without the smut carrying it like some other writers on tumblr. However when you do add the actual smut it never disappoints. It’s literally like grade A stuff ya know lol. I feel like I’m reading a mini novel when I read your writing and I love it.

💕 PLS COME GET UR KISSES ANON!! no but seriously thank you, smut is always one of the areas i feel most self conscious about writing and i’m nervous to post it when i do write it, but i’m glad you guys like it (and want more?? maybe??) 💕

#BD answers #ask #fic q's

[shadowtongued]

long headcanon about the duality of love and the mahjarrat condition pertaining to it from his point of view. if you read all this babble i swear to god, i love you, i hope you have a good day. cw: sex addiction, child neglect, unhealthy coping, unrequited pains. reason for writing: hi i want to die bc of angst.

i think we all know even without playing medieval xp grind lore game, runescape, that sliske is old. very old. he tells us in endgame there's not much he hasn’t done with his life over thousands of years, even traveling to other planets and realms to just see what was out there and how far he could get. i’ve always projected his age as somewhere between more than 8,000 or even more than 10,000. we’re never given a timeline to how long the children of mah have lived. sliske has done a lot with his time; he’s killed a god, had quite a few elder relics in his grasp, SPOKEN to a elder god and managed not to die, mastered shadow magicks, has an excellent grasp on the shadow realm. he’s good with biology, chemistry, has a fair understanding of soul magic which is kind of a rare brand of knowledge, he’s tricked probably thousands into bad contracts to become wights in his army, understands the psychology and bad morals of people. he was a playwright, a high ranking officer, a spymaster. dude is just a determined polymath. you know what he hasn’t done? love. he’s never got to play with love.

mahjarrat are explained as having emotions, but dulled ones. they feel rage and pride apparently better than others. kharshai said after years of really believing he was a human, that when he came back to his true form he states “i  feel raw power coursing through my veins. i don't feel pain like i used to, and i'm sure my intellect has increased. but somehow there is something missing. a capacity for emotion that i can't quite put my finger on.” they aren’t equipped for the same range of positive emotions as others are. they feel it, but they don’t understand it fully, it has been said by developers. this whole bit is sadly funny considering in canon, sliske catches feelings. he doesn’t realize he’s attracted to the player character. it’s stated many times, in his journals, in dialogue, etc. he believes their fates are tangled no matter what. and the saddest bit is he probably doesn’t understand these feelings and it confuses him to the point of anger.  “ love! a mahjarrat in love? ... i almost wish that were true. it would certainly make the universe a more interesting place. ” “ so perhaps i have loved you. but that doesn’t mean i have to like you.”  sliske’s main goal started off as to take the players immortal, unable to be crushed by the divine, soul and give it to himself so he could live forever, as mahjarrats do not have afterlives, once they die they are done, evaporated into energy. but in endgame we learn something from him hidden in masks that refutes that;

“I love you for more than your soul.”

you STUPID fucker, you’re in love.

the remainder of this is a lot of NON-CANON, personal headcanon interpretation that pretty much only works on this blog. as a rough summary: sliske’s ol’ mum was not fond of her kids, half-brother wahisietel or sliske since she did not see them as powerful as herself and was disappointed that's what her legacy came out to. a short, beefy, average at magic son, she had another go and was still disappointed with this spidery, scrawny, gifted but absolutely annoying stick underweight child. his father, saw him once or twice in his life and that was it. dyeosuthua wanted nothing more than to make them disappear and try again until she got offspring she didn’t want to throw into a lava pit in secrecy, infanticide was against tribal law due to population issues. sliske’s mother’s neglect was so severe, ( by the absolute boundless joys of rp development and mutual heacanons ♥ ) that wahi and nabor had an attempt at raising him and keeping him from freezing to death. why is all this jargon important? because while all mahjarrats are raised by tough love, sliske’s attention deprivation from his mother was so severe, he grew up and still has a slew of reactive attachment, psychological, and social issues he still carries as an adult. several times she threatened to kill him and almost made good on it more than twice. when wahisietel had proven he was a survivor of the first ritual of rejuvenation, sliske became dyeosuthua’s  main target for abuse despite his gift for magic at a young age. nothing he did could impress her enough. and it left him constantly seeking approval and validation to an insecure mind.

the more he grew, the more confident he became mainly out of spite and to get attention. he’s loud, charming, makes you the only person in the room when he talks to you. he has an innate silver-tongued ability that persuades people to do just about anything. it was a front for his insecurities that he kept very very closed up. in the second age/senntisten capital, sliske had a pretty severe sex addiction as it was one of the few ways he felt validated and was able to get affection in a way he could digest. people with reactive attachment disorders often have sex addictions to fill the space of acceptance without having to commit.. easy, feel good intimacy without having to open up and let someone learn about your vulnerabilities and commit. it was pretty severe, considering mahjarrats find any kind of breeding or intimacies outside their ‘superior species’ as downright foul. sliske had always been the black sheep of the tribe and with his status as praefectus praetorio; head of secret police, really nothing put a damper on him trying to fill the void for affection he had. there wasn’t a species or individual he wouldn’t bed. he would easily take up propositions even for people who just wanted to fuck a mahjarrat because it was ‘exotic’ or because of his status as an officer, he now looks back on this and it bruises his insecurities even more that he allowed himself to do that. not out of pride for his species. but himself, being just a thing to be had because of rarity. azzanadra and his brother, wahisietel found out about it and while disgusted, partially understood what he was doing to negatively self soothe. at one point sliske and azzanadra, the champion of their god and head of the church, as well of one of the strongest living of their kin, had a lasting tryst for a few years and for awhile it made sliske feel very much self important in a way and alleviated his need to be needed so badly, this did not end well when sliske grew tired of their empire and wanted freedom. once childhood best friends and lovers had become absolute enemies once sliske became too unstable and azzanadra became too zealous. 

sliske gave up his sexcapades for a long time, thousands of years, his libido dropped when he became interested in other projects and self healing when he was hit with the idea that he hasd essentially allowed himself to be an exotic fling and still burned over becoming his god, zaros, scapegoat after all he had done for him. love was a weird concept to him and still is. despite being adamant love doesn’t exist for his kind, and his belief that he is flawed, unstable, and embraced the idea of ‘you want a monster? fine! i’ll be the monster!’. he expects no pity, not be forgiven to things he has done and even in game when you sycophantically try to cozy to him, he straight up calls out your text choice was awful considering some of the shitty things he might have done to you. to sliske, all attention to him is attention, whether you’re praising or insulting him. he’s on your mind, he exists, that’s all he wants.

backstory aside the real part of this headcanon is that sliske actually wants love. it’s the only thing aside from an immortal soul he hasn’t had. sliske actually has an attraction to humans because they are empathetic, curious, passionate, and determined. he has an easier time assimilating and being around them since he has ALWAYS had a better sense of humor, socializing, and happiness than his kin. he feels emotions a lot stronger than his fellow mahjarrats. it allows him to talk to and connect to humans and humanlike species better. others of his kind have told him there’s “something wrong” with him for that. he’s actually a romantic, even if he’s just mimicking romance stories, movies, and actions from others. he thinks the idea of settling with one person and loving them is both mortifying and interesting. opening yourself up to someone and giving them the hammer to smash your cherry-red painted porcelain heart and seeing if they do, to him might be the ultimate form of trust and biggest gamble of russian roulette. the stakes are so heavy he’s high on the idea. but it’s also horrifying. mahjarrat are prolific for not opening up, not allowing others in, vulnerability out in the open is a death sentence. they live in a kratocracy/meritocracy where they kill off the weakest link. it’s not pretty. being soft is a useless, unnecessary, weak gene to them. it dampers survival. 

but yet sliske keeps reading romance novels, writing his own confused poetry, and getting into unrequited one sided loves but practicing a backstabbing betrayal when one gets too close. i have to hurt them before they hurt me, betray and cut them down before they can do it to me. i think he wants to be loved. i think he kinda wants to be taught to love, for the emotions and the sake of knowledge. ( brb james newton howard’s ‘true love’s kiss’ from maleficent just came on spotify and i think i’m going to die bc i did not ask for background music thanks!!! ) he wouldn’t be the best at it, maybe a little too possessive with you, codependent, but very nurturing and fun loving. will sepnd a whole week spooning you.. people who hurt you past, present, and future may end up dead in mysterious ways or turned into a wight for you to beat the shit out of. but he’d try. he’s still got a broken child sitting behind his third rib. i think he would snarl the first few times someone genuinely got close to him, it would terrify him, being known on such a skinned, raw level. having gentle touches that are real and not a come hither to the bedroom. being known for something other than the confident, ego he has is death. he could be taught to be gentle for a crumb of consistent attention. might even cut down the murders and god killing down by 15%. love is not going to fix him, it’s not going to forgive the actual shitty things he’s done. it should never do that. but it will turn the lights on in a dark house.

love could really break him. i think so. i’d type more but this has gone on too long and i feel sad-happies. 

#me @ me: die bitch #yell at me in an ask if i roasted both you and i at 450 deg f and basted you with butter and rosemary with a good wine too #// long post #✦ │ 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙲𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽𝚂 & 𝚃𝙷𝙴𝙾𝚁𝙸𝙴𝚂 ––– i do hate parting with information.

[ghoularaki]

I know you hate all might and you’ve made amazing points. Would you happen to hate Endeavor too? If so can I get some points on that because people don’t understand how shitty of a person he is (sorry if you like him)

tw//abuse mention (we are talking about endeavor here lol)

If given the opportunity I would fucking kick Endeavor’s teeth in. I despise him so much. ajngurig I don’t hate All Might, he just disappoints me lol. y’all are making me feel validated with wanting to know my opinions ahhh so I will totally make points about Endeavor. 

1. uhhh obvious one, he abuses his children. And no I didn’t put that in past tense for a reason. It is hinted that he doesn’t physically abuse Shouto anymore, but he is still very much emotionally and verbally abusive. Also he doesn’t care about Natsuo and Fuyumi. The only child he really is trying to make amends with is Shouto which is clear with how he harasses him constantly to “apologize.” 

2. His shitty ass redemption arc. I’m going to so honest and say he does not deserve it and he didn’t allude to any behavior that he regretted what he did until he got what he wanted which is gross, sorry :). It wasn’t until he became number 1 and realized “wow I can’t be a shitty person and be number 1 I guess, time to give half assed apologies to my son and send flowers to my wife who I kept in a mental hospital for over ten years instead of ya know... letting her out.” Yes he is showing remorseful behavior and is kinda? changing his ways not really, but after years of the trauma he put his whole family through he doesn’t deserve to be forgiven. Also Endeavor believes he has a right to being forgiven when he doesn’t at all. 

3. his obsession with power and having an inferiority complex at fucking 46. Literally all of his reign of terror stems from him being insecure and having this one sided competition with All Might (another reason why hero ranking is wack bc it causes shit like this). The ONLY reason he had children is to breed the perfect child that he can groom into the next number 1 hero because he was sure he was never going to win. He did not marry Rei out of love and there is quite the possibility he forced her to marry him and have children with him for this reason since it was a quirk marriage. It boggles my mind why anyone would like him after having knowledge of that. When we found out Touya died (?? dabi??) the only thing he had to say about it before becoming number 1 was how unfortunate it was he had such a powerful quirk but his body couldn’t handle it. Or how he neglected Fuyumi and Natsuo because they didn’t have powerful quirks. Or how he drove his wife to the point of insanity. He will only care about power and now he got it, he realized how lonely it is up at the top.

4. He’s not a good hero and no matter how many times in the manga they say he is, I don’t believe it. What I mean by this is yes, he gets the job done but he’s such a dick. Literally everyone is afraid of him and the only reason he became a hero is for power. That’s not what a good hero is. A hero is a hero because they want to help people not for fame, glory or power. 

5. now for the counter arguments because ik people will say these. “but he’s learning to be better” he’s 46, he is way passed the mark of not knowing what he was doing was wrong. go read point 2 again. “you say a hero shouldn’t be one because of power but what about bakugou?” bakugou is still a child and is already showing behavior that he thinks power isn’t just what makes a good hero. go watch the provisional exam in season 4 where bakugou tells off that kid.  

I feel like endeavor apologists are either a) people that never got abused and b) people who were abused and are projecting onto endeavor’s redemption arc bc their abuser never apologized (which is valid). I just see too much of my abuser in endeavor so it just fuels my hatred even more lol. 

#again no one has to agree with me but i said what i said #discourse i guess lol #new message #404 not found

[whumpbby]

What if for Omega Gotham University AU Dick’s never met Jason face-to-face and is rejecting solely based on the fact that he’s flattered by the idea but he’s happily in a relationship. Is this a capes universe? Anyway maybe down the line he and Kori break up and when Jason’s over for dinner with Dami he finally meets the omega for the first time in person! Dami’s like you had your chance Richard! So begins the secret war for Jason’s hand. Jason just wants to graduate top of his class.

Now I'm thinking about what if in the University AU Jay starts to hang around the manor more and more since Damian is very adamant they start building up their bond NOW to make it stronger in the future and then, someday, Dixk and Koro break it off shortly before the wedding and Dick is heartbroken and starts spending more time at the manor again as well to take comfort from his pack and in the beginninf, he really isn't interested in Jay. (1/?)

His girlfriend just dumoed him and he is hesrtbroken. But as time passes (months? Years?), he starts seeing the world and other possibilities with open eyes again and suddenly he can see all the appeal Damian made sure to tell him off when he first introduced Jay. Damian, fully into puberty by now, is everything but thrilled, and Dick has the greates conflict bc on one hand that's his baby brother and hw's in love, not to mention all the social norms he would break by persuing Jay now (2/?)

that Dami's picked him, but Jay's just to cute and Dami was right,he would be a perfect mate. Dami more than agrees with that and gets a little territorial with Jay to 'strengthen his claim'. All the while Jay is just over there like.... what? (3/3)

_________XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX________

I don’t know if you’re the same Anon, anon, but I put these two together, because  this speaks to me. 

BUT

What IF – listen to me, what if the situation gets kind of ridiculous, because we’ll start with Jason at 17 and  Damian at 12, and Dick is 19-20, and he DOES marry Kori, and they’re happy, but… well, Kori isn’t an omega, she’s an alien and she loves Dick, but she knows there’s something he’s missing – that his pack is missing, so she starts to nudge him towards maybe listening to his baby brother and that omega he’s talking about – that would unify the family if they had an omega, yes? She’s not opposed to expanding her little family unit either;]

So Dick starts to pay attention and, damn, by the time Jay is 19 he grew and filled out, and he has this incredible nerdish charm, but he’s also training boxing in the meanwhile (therapist advised him to pick up sport and he picked up defensive one;]) so he’s also a bit stacked and growing taller with every month and Dick – who has a wife almost 6 inches taller than him – is already interested>>

Pity that Damian is so defensive all of a sudden, claiming the omega for himself only and Dick is like, Damin, he hasn’t agreed to anything yet, this is not middle ages you can’t claim someone who isn’t willing. But Damian is like, no, he will be mine, I just have to keep him available until I’m of age and able to properly court him! And he was doing well at it in the last couple years – at the Academy it’s known that if an alpha makes a move towards Todd, he will have a Wayne heir on their back so everyone stays away – and Jason, who never had a good track record with alphas or people in general, is kinda grateful for the overprotective (or so he thinks) baby alpha hanging around, because people leave him alone…

And in time Jason gets used to the kid and the fact that sometimes his butler/chauffeur will drive them somewhere to have ice cream, and while they’re at it help Jay with his English homework a bit (Alfred, as it happens, tends to agree with Damian, the pack would surely gain with such an omega and the boy deserves a better life than he’s got so far, so he’s willing to play into Damian’s little scheme) and every once in a while he’ll be invited to the Manor for Holidays

“It’s in poor taste to leave a friend of Master Damian to spend the Christmas alone, young sir. I will hear no excuses, there’s a place at the table set for you.”

Jason assume sit’s because Damian has so few friends that the family tries to keep the ones he does have happy – and he’s not entirely wrong;] – so he comes over and Alfred takes care of him. Bruce is also there, inviting and very smooth, and Jason is impressed and so, so does not believe that this is his life now. Then he meets the ever elusive Dick Grayson and is like, wow:O

So, while Dami and Dick hash it out between them for the right to have an omega, disaster strikes and the Drakes are killed and Bruce decides to take their son into his pack – the rich of Gotham will tear the kid apart – and it’s all noble and shit, but… Tim is an omega. And that changes things. Damian is like, oh no, how am I supposed to deal with two omegas in my pack?? Because he’s convinced that he’ll be the head after Bruce and will gear nothing else;]

And Timmy causes the pack dynamic to change around him – and Jason, who started to slowly cotton on to the fact that the Waynes may be trying to court him (only took him 3 years=_=) is struck with the thought that oh, now they won’t need him anymore. Thing about omegas entering new packs is that they undergo a settling period where they hash out the prime position in subtle ways – and Jason was on the way to settling into that position slowly, but Tim has now more claim as a legit adoptee, so they both feel unsure and wrong-footed, and the alphas around them are not helping (alphas don’t understand that process) and Jason decides – as the older one – to step away and lick his wounds alone, like he usually does, because Jason Todd can’t have nice things.

Except Tim won’t have that, because Tim is a baby (17) and doesn’t know what to do as an omega with a pack that acknowledges him Waynes are intimidating and scary and he wants to be good, but he was raised traditionally, where the omega has to be seen, but not heard, and he just… he doesn’t know… he just lost his patents, he can’t be an omega of a pack, he needs help, he always looked at Jason and admired him and he never wanted to unseat himTAT

Alfred sets out to fix this, but, surprisingly, it’s Bruce that goes to Jason and takes him out to a nice dinner and hashes out the situation – the truth of Damian’s odd behavior, he way their pack would very much like Jason to join them, because they’re all a little bit broken and Jason is an omega that just fits, and that, if Damian and Dick are a bit too much, then Bruce is perfectly willing to Mark Jay and make him a part of the pack. Not because they expect him to birth them pups until Tim comes of age, but because they like him.

And Jason is like, oh. He never, he never even considered having pups, he never though he’d have the security to have his own kids, never trusted into alphas giving him a choice in the matter, so he stayed away from them, but now it’s… well, it’s a nice thought, isn’t it? An idea of pups that will be cared for by a pack even when he decides to go back to school or work, that will be provided for and loved… that never even occurred to him. Even if he was the second of the pack, because Tim has better breeding, that would be more than he’d ever have otherwise…it’s tempting. He doesn’t know if he’d have kids, but the option being available is a novelty… And no one in the Wayne pack is hard on the eyes, to be honest…

…and in his deepest fantasies, in his heart of hearts, he used to dream of this, of being rescued from his crappy life by a handsome, wealthy alpha, of becoming someone’s mate – and life cured him from believing these fantasies, he set out to save himself and managed to do it, but… it’s still there, in the back of his head the little voice is weeping with joy, because this is one stupid wish he had as a kid coming true if he lets it.

And Bruce wasn’t raised in a barn, he’s aware this is a monumental decision, so he leaves Jason to think it through and makes it clear that when Jay makes his decision they will start the courting process – a proper one this time, to give him time to get used to the idea and change his mind if necessary. They won’t jump into it, he will have to accept everyone in the pack – and there’s more kids Bruce has that Jason met so far – and he doesn’t want to tear Jay away from studies, either, since it’s so important to him. Bruce is being perfectly transparent about it, like, I am perfectly ready to get the professors to home school you for the rest of the degree so we can focus on courting, but I know it’s important for you to make it through and show them that an omega can handle university just as well, and I respect that, courting will have to take a backseat. Even though every instinct in his head argues that if they don’t secure that sterling omega now they may lose him:O

He starts to understand Damian a bit>>

headcanon,

#headcanon

[the-strawzish-clownfish]

Oh, you wanted me to hit you with some? Bet. Do all of them Strawberry

YOBI I LEGIT JUST ASKED SOMEONE THE SAME THING

YOU’RE OMNISCIENT I SWEAR

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

I have never considered that before now but thanks for that

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

3 probably, I’m not really scared of the dark most of the time (unless it’s literally pitch black), but every once in a while i get really unnerved bc i get rlly paranoid

3. The person you would never want to meet?

Satan

4. What is your favorite word?

“faith” bc my faith and bc synesthesia

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

uhhh flowering cherry bc at my old house my brothers and I each had a tree that my dad planted for us when we were each born and mine was a flowering cherry

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

I looked in the mirror this morning?

7. What shirt are you wearing?

coral pink bubba gump shrimp co. t shirt

8. What do you label yourself as?

child of God, daughter of Sappho

9. Bright room or dark room?

bright if we’re talking natural light being let in through my windows, dark if we’re talking just normally bc rlly bright lights mess w my sensory issues

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

talking to you yobi

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?

this age, I’m a firm believer in that things will always get better, even if only one small thing does improve, when i think back on past years i get anxious and nostalgia isn’t good for me

12. Who told you they loved you last?

@toomanyfanfics that one

13. Your worst enemy?

my mental health tbh

14. What is your current desktop picture?

15. Do you like someone?

never experienced romantic attraction, i used to have a plush (qp crush) on one of my best irl friends tho (@ blob have fun with this fact)

16. The last song you listened to?

I am listening to Echosmith’s Cool Kids as I am writing this, before that I was listening to Girls by Marina and the Diamonds, which is a hilarious song i 11/10 recommend

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

myself, I’m not s*icidal but I’m not killing someone else

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

whoever the person who decided Teen Vogue should endorse child pornography was

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

me, I would make myself do actual work for once

20. What is your best physical attribute?

my eyes, i just like them. fun fact this one kid i used to be kinda good friends with was talking with me on snapchat once (bc we did that a lot, back when i had snapchat) and i don’t remember how we got into this but he ended up describing my eyes really weirdly? it was really deep and got kinda strange? it was like a movie scene but via text message and then in the middle of it he was like “wtf am i doing” and i will always remember that (dude if you are for some reason reading this then idek what to say man. sorry). anyone who knows me irl (@ you blob) can take a guess as to who this is

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

idk the answer to either of those questions tbh

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

idek man sorry

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

weed, like i’m genuinely terrified of being in its presence (never been in its presence before), i’ve had nightmares about it

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

EVERY TIME I GO TO SUBWAY I GET THE SAME THING. BUFFALO CHICKEN, RANCH, AND CHEESE ON ITALIAN HERBS AND CHEESE TOASTED. I WOULD REPLICATE THAT

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

go to Atlanta and find a homeless person and buy them some clothes and food and some blankets

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

CANADA

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?

first of all why is an angel giving me unlimited alcohol that’s just kinda strange second of all i am a MINOR i am not legally ALLOWED however i will probably just take whatever and give it to some people, someone will like it

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? 

be kind and do good where you can and if someone wrongs you forgive them

29. What is your favorite expletive?

as;ldkfjasdkgaj;lsdf

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

my cactus!! she is v important to me

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

the first thing that comes to mind was really traumatic for me, but it’s what brought me as close as i am to God now so idk that i would get rid of it. idrk man, it really sucked but i’m glad that I’m so much closer to God now

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a [redacted bc even though this is a hypothetical i absolutely would never do this and refuse to acknowledge it even in a hypothetical situation]. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

….Canada?

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

idk, peeps are in heaven now and i don’t really wanna take that away from them

34. What was your last dream about?

ask God not me

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

no

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

not really, however i have had several surgeries (all on my mouth) so i was in the hospital for those

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

I have built a real, genuine snowman once in my life, and the only proof is a picture i have bc i was so little i can’t even remember it. it doesn’t snow in georgia

38. What is the color of your socks?

ain’t wearing em, however most of mine are gray with some colorful bits

39. What type of music do you like?

I have an eclectic mix of favorites.

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

sunrises all the way, the afternoon and evening make me anxious but nighttime and dawn and early morning are the best times

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

vanilla bitch

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)

UGA i guess bc it’s ga and that’s a safe answer, i don’t really follow sports (i watch baseball sometimes though)

43. Do you have any scars?

oh i’m covered in tiny ones, the most notable being one on my thigh that was on my knee when i first noticed it. to this day i do not know how i got it

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

gay

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

i wanna be better about lying

46. Are you reliable?

heh depends, when it comes to knowing random things or being stupid, yes, but when it comes to remembering things, such as dates and times and things? absolutely not

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

Has it gotten easier?

48. Do you hold grudges?

yes and no

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

a whelk and a quetzalcoatlus, no i do not accept constructive criticism

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

i once spent hours talking to myself about if it is possible for a perfectly fair coin to exist outside of theory

51. Are you a good liar?

I like to think so

52. How long could you go without talking?

Oh I could go a looooooooooooooong time, however i do have my chatterbox days and i am known for not shutting up so it’s really a tossup on that one

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

when i was 3 my mom put blonde highlights in my hair and it was absolutely absurd

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

i cannot bake to save my life, however i have made my father cheesecakes for his birthday and they turned out okay so idk

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

sco-ish

56. What do you like on your toast?

a crap ton of butter

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

dude in a graduation cap

58. What would be you dream car?

idk whatever’s cheap and works

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

uhhh not really no

60. Do you believe in aliens?

i mean i don’t think we’re the only life in the entire universe, so yeah (and also they’ve found traces of ancient bacteria on Mars so if you don’t believe then who are you kidding)

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

occasionally, i don’t believe in astrology but it’s at least somewhat accurate a lot of the time and i like to freak myself out

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

you’d think i’d have an answer for this, however i have never thought about this before. so e ig

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

if your answer to this is dinosaurs then get out of my house

64. What do you think about babies?

they’re good at shrieking, and for that i admire them

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.

i am not interesting

#are you pleased with yourself yobi #sorry this took so long #strawzy answers #fucking yobi #tw swearing #cw swearing #strawzy cleans out dus inbox