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#and just about everything else NOT related to why shes even there to begin with

storiesforthemoonchild · 5 months

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Head Over Heels | Alexia Putellas x Reader

based on this request! Enjoy :)

You’re chatting away in the middle of the pitch with Aitana and Ona after training when your captain approaches. “Here,” she says, pushing a water bottle into your hand. This was the usual, Alexia was always quick to look over you whether at practice or anywhere else. The only problem was outside of her short demands to make sure you were taken care of, the girl didn’t much speak to you.

Which is why Aitana and Ona both chuckle at the act, earning a glare from over the captain's shoulder as she walks away. “I was thirsty too,” Ona calls after her with a laugh.

“Please just ask her out already. It’s a bit sad,” Aitana pleads with you.

You shake your head, “She’s not even said she was interested in me like that.”

“If you don’t think she’s interested then you are naive,” Ona waves off.

You roll your eyes, finally taking a gulp out of the water bottle. You look up to see Alexia watching you and send her a smile. As usual she just nods before turning and heading inside.

You signed with Barcelona over the summer, and you haven’t gotten more than a few words at a time out of Alexia if it wasn’t related to football. It was like she made a point to stay far away, but just close enough at the same time. If you took a hard tackle in game or training she was the first one by your side. If you looked a bit tired, she would casually go for a water and pass it off to you after only taking a sip. If you were out with the team and someone got uncomfortably close, she was quick to swoop in and guide you away. If on the walk back to your car on a night out you shiver because you didn’t bring a jacket, she would silently wrap hers around you.

You had tried to engage with her outside of these brief moments, but it was like pulling teeth with her. Especially if the other girls were around as they were always eager to begin their teasing. You weren’t naive as Ona suggested, it was blatantly obvious her helpful nature went above and beyond when it came to you.

You were certain she had some sort of feelings, and every little thing she did made you feel the exact same way. Every secret glance she thought you didn’t notice and the comforting hand whenever you were struggling, told you everything that went unsaid.

With Aitana’s words hanging about in your mind, you linger after training today. Making a point to take your time in the showers, hoping to time it perfectly with Alexia’s arrival back from the physio. If she wouldn’t make the move then you would do it yourself. You’re slow to change, watching as your teammates begin to file out for the day.

You are slipping into your socks when Ona comes up to you, “are you coming to lunch with us?” You hesitate, your eyes drifting up to Alexia as she finally enters the room, her eyes meeting yours immediately. Ona notices, looking between the both of you, “yeah nevermind. It’s clear you have other plans,” she chuckles.

You wait and it feels like ages before the midfielder is walking out from the showers with her dampened hair hanging around her face. She stops in her tracks when she notices you. Your teammates are long gone, but the room never felt more full. “Are you okay?”

You smile, of course that’s what she would ask you, “Sí.” She looks you over before seemingly satisfied and moving to finish gathering her things, “are you ever going to ask me out?”

Before you came to Barça everyone told you about the fierce and tough persona that was Alexia Putellas, but you’ve never seen that side. Of course you understood the way she could be seen as intimidating on the pitch, but Alexia was pure mush in your eyes. She was full of meaningful gestures, shy glances and stuttered words. You would call her adorable. “Ar-Are you talking to me?”

“It’s only me and you in here,” you chuckle. “Do you want to have lunch with me?”

You’re ready to take it all back, afraid you misread all the signs as she stares at you wide-mouthed. You are just about to open your mouth to take it back when Alexia’s abrupt response comes, “SÍ! No…yes cool.” Alexia attempts to downplay her excitement. “A date, sí?”

“Yes, definitely a date.”

There's a brief silence before she speaks again, "I was practicing my English."

"What?" you ask, confused what that had to do with anything.

Alexia blushes, "before I ask you on date. I needed to study my English."

It was your turn to blush. Yeah Alexia Putellas was anything, but intimidating in your eyes.

#woso x reader #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas imagine

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charmtale · 2 months

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Shameful secrets cause a person to become haunted. She cannot sleep, for a shaming secret is like a cruel barbed wire that catches her across the gut as she tries to run free.

(Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Women Who Run With the Wolves)

the fact that no one* knew about akio's abuse of anthy is far from the only thing wrong with it, but the inherent shameful secrecy of it was an integral part of her abuse, something that significantly served to isolate anthy from her peers.

it was definitely akio's plan for utena to see anthy and akio at the end of ep. 36. (anthy's hands disappear into her hair = she had no hand in this. + the way the scene lights up like how lights come on at the beginning of a new scene in a play (anthy's previously black silhouette gaining color and features) = it was staged. not to mention her bleak expression) akio thought that utena would just be disgusted by her, and/or feel betrayed, and that would be that. however, he sealed his fate (anthy being able to ditch him) with this action, because utena offered anthy compassion and understanding instead of condemning her.

utena acknowledging anthy's pain as a result of being abused by akio touched anthy more than any of utena's other actions up to that point. while utena says a lot of stuff in that scene about utena's ego and being a prince, anthy only has visible reactions to two of utena's lines until utena is completely done speaking.

"And the night I learned about you and Akio...!"

the camera focuses completely on anthy, nothing else shown, as anthy slightly tilts her head up. there is no dialogue while anthy makes this small movement; anthy is listening intently for what utena will say next, and the show wants us to notice that.

"I thought that you had betrayed me. Even though you were suffering so much...!"

when utena talks about suffering- acknowledging that akio's treatment of anthy caused anthy pain- anthy uncurls her body significantly. a visual indicator of feeling less shame, immediately in that moment.

anthy does not move in reaction to anything else utena says until utena is fully done speaking, when anthy and utena are now shown kinda-holding eachother. utena may or may not know the full impact of her words, but it is clear to the viewers what moved anthy to say:

"It doesn't matter now. Just leave this school. Forget about everything that happened here!"

in anthy's opinion, this has to be the kindest, most honest thing she can say in this moment. utena leaving would ruin akio's plan and anthy would be the obvious reason why (likely leading to punishment), not to mention how anthy would obviously miss utena. the fact anthy said it anyway shows how impactful utena's statement was

it's good to talk about utena's obsessive girlprincing and how it was damaging. it's good that utena acknowledges it herself. but i think the fandom commonly overestimates how much that mattered to anthy, especially in relation to this scene. i feel that people sometimes abbreviate it as 'utena apologized to anthy for her egotistical behavior, and that brought them closer together!' like yes, she did and that was positive and indicative of utena maturing. but i do not think that was the most important aspect here

#rgu #anthy himemiya #women who run with the wolves #*(nanami and touga knew eventually but that's neither here nor there #if anything nanami knowing and treating anthy like even more of a weirdo for it would reinforce anthy's shame #not that i blame nanami. she is 13 and in hell)

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illya-roma · 11 months

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DP X DC PROMPT- (Fic that I'd totally probably might write)

Jason had learned from being a Robin to being Red Hood to expect a lot of things, from fighting the deranged to expecting the unexpected like daina (WONDER WOMAN!) being mind controlled.

But he never expected this.

He usually doesn't come here to begin, not after- after it happened, but he does each time whenever the pits wants to remind hims of what he could have lost. (What he lost, how it hurt hurt hurt. How HE hurt them. He knows that even if they forgive him, they'll never trust him again. The pit laughs from behind)

But tonight, in front of him sat someone?something? what appears to be a teenager from 14 to 16, with red hair that flickers similar to a flame and skin too pale and ears too pointy.

But it?she? sat on one of the headstone with her eyes glazed, too deep in her own thoughts.

A series of bubbles cut her off. She proceeded to put the baby (that seemed completely human) on her shoulder and allowed him to burb. Then cocooned him in blankets and hummed him to sleep.

Right now, he isn't red hood (or Robin). And his gun may not affect her, that is if the child belongs to someone else. (Did the parents give them to her? Or is she related? Have any alarms of a breakout occur that a meta? experiments? escape?).

(He sounds like Bruce.)

"A penny for your thoughts?"

The girl had her eyes on the child, with a small sad smile and flickers of flaming hair. "Just..."

"Just wondering what my grave would have looked like."

He sucked a breath.

"That ones yours...right?"

The girl (child ghost holy fuck!) nodded her head to his own grave. "Y-yeah...it's mine."

"It's beautiful... And well cleaned...They must've cared a lot, mister Jason."

He never thought about that. A well taken grave describes a caring family wouldn't it? (They do care! How is it still clean though?)

"Yeah...but uh...um...What's up with the..the baby?" Is the baby alive?

"Oh...Noone will take care of my baby boy... So.. I had to come back..."

She pushed back a few strands of black hair with tender eyes and the lightest touch. As if he where the most fragile crystle.

Jason could see himself in the child. All loved to the point his own mother would give up everything just for him. Except it was Bruce, it was Bruce that took him in and loved him. Standing beside his bed during nightmares when he cried and taking away the monsters. Sitting with Alfred, cooking together and exchanging stories.

(His family loved him. His family loves him.)

"Would you like to fly with me?"

Robin made me magic

He keeps wiping his face while she put the baby in a safer position. "We can have a brawl for fun after I put little Danny in his bed a-" she stopped mid scentence when looking at him

He sputtered. " Is something wrong?"

With fear in her eyes she floated, creating distance between both of them. She shaked her head in disbelief.

"You...you died..."

He took a step farther, not wanting to scare them away.

"But..b-but your... nononono why do you look like that?!"

He wanted to ask like what, but she disappeared before his eyes. (Did she know he wasn't safe? That he hurt his family?)

...

Beep

"Hey Jaylad, is the pit be-

"B-Bruce"

"Jason, what's wrong? Are yo- what happend?"

"I'm sorry, I'm s-so sorry, I'm sorry! Dad I'm sor-"

"I'm coming, hang in there."

"Little Wing what's wrong?"

"Todd, who hurt you? Who should I kill?"

"Jason, back ups close. Breath with me, alright!"

(His family loves him)

(The pits were silenced)

_______________________________________

In an alternative universe the Fenton are still driving around and setting up traps, unfortunately Jazz is the one who removes them and got caught.

Since jazz is the one that doesn't wear hazmats and dany is still a baby (she makes sure is far from their experiments with ectoplasm), she becomes a ghost who decides that she doesn't want Danny to get hurt and takes him somewhere near a lot of ectoplasm.

Gotham: sweet baby girl, little baby harley.

Let the drama begin.

Chapter 2

#dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dc x dp crossover #dc x dp #dp crossover #dp x dc prompt #dpxdc #dp x dc fanfic #dc x dp au #jazz was a child but sees herself as a teenager #not and adult like the not dependaple adults around her #and not a child tgat she needs help for #but is still a psychiatrist girl #angst #fluff #?#dp au #dp x dc au

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saturnniidae · 2 months

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Hi since it's aro-spec week I'd like to just highlight one of my absolute favorite things about httyd, from the viewpoint of an aromantic:

The importance it puts on platonic relationships.

The whole franchise is of course, centered around Hiccup and Toothless' bond. They're friendship is from the beginning built on unconditional trust. They care for each other so much. They are best friends, hey mean everything to each other and have a bond nothing else (even romantic relationships) could ever rival.

(I could say so much more about them honestly but it's all probably been said before by someone better at articulating their thoughts so whatever)

Another aspect I love is while there are romantic relationships and plots, they're not shoved in the audience's faces. Other than certain episodes dedicated to Hiccstrid's development, it's mostly just, there. Neither the story nor the characters' lives revolve around it and it's honestly a bit refreshing.

Hiccup and Astrid very clearly value they're friendship. In the episode they got together, what Hiccup said to her very clearly implied how important to him she is, and he'd be fine even if they weren't romantic partners, as long as they can still be with each other.

And that's so special to me.

Like, it is not something you often see in media. And even when they do start dating, they primarily put their friendship first—and not just with each other, like there's a whole rtte episode basically dedicated to why they need to value their friendships just as much as they value each other.

And of course, the friendship between the dragon riders as a whole. As much as they fight, and despite their actions towards Hiccup in the past, they all clearly care for each other immensely and unconditionally. It's so unfortunate that they're just side characters in the movies, I really wish they're friendships got more of a spotlight but at least we have Rob and Rtte.

(Imo it does a very good job making these characters relatable whether you feel romantic attraction or not.)

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evergreenalice · 1 year

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I'll never get over the fucking tunnel of love scene, it's just the best fucking scene I love it so much

first of all, it follows the objectively amazing scene between Homura and Sayaka

the song "Dream World" begins to play as the Clara Dolls chant "fort, da, fort, da" in the background, the meaning of this I'm too lazy to explain, and if you don't know why the words "fort" and "da" are important to Rebellion, just look it up, there are better explanations than I can give. What's important is that these words relate to Homura and Madoka, the Clara Dolls are an extension of Homura, and thus Homura is presumably thinking about Madoka

as we see Sayaka's cape flying away from their confrontation, Homura begins a monologue

we see Clara Dolls dancing on a pink spool, representative of Madoka (if you don't know why, once again, I request that you look up "fort da Madoka") so once more an indication of where Homura's thoughts currently are

we see two swans, generally a symbol of love (fun fact, because of this one scene the moment I see swans I instantly think of Madoka Magica)

we see Homura standing on the front of of the boat, one of her familiars standing in the boat, not doing anything notable, I bring this up to come back to it later, also it's just a good shot

the world shifts as Homura moves through it, remember, this is essentially her dream, the things that appear are from Homura's mind

we see a paper Kyoko standing on an arch asking us if we're enjoying the movie (thank you for asking Kyoko :) Indeed I am)

a tunnel rises from the ocean

Kyoko says this, displaying essentially the ideal life for Kyoko, her relationship with Mami is never soured, and they're still friends, and they're just doing good stuff, none of the darkness that exists in reality

we see Homura's annoyed, perhaps somewhat conflicted even, face

we enter the tunnel, and it's clearly meant to be a tunnel of love, remember, the things in this world are created from her thoughts, there is a reason for a tunnel of love being here and it has to do with Homura's thoughts, EVERYTHING in this tunnel is from Homura's mind, it existing, everything in it, and where it leads, are from HER thoughts, keep that fact in mind

Mami just outright states that everything is ideal

beautiful shot, nothing else to say

Sayaka outright asks if this is so bad. She has a very goofy face because Homura is annoyed with her, I love this detail "YOU'RE TOO LATE SAYAKA I'VE ALREADY DEPICTED YOU AS THE SOYJACK!"

Homura accidentally criticizing herself, however, once again, EVERYTHING HERE IS HOMURA, this is an argument with herself, she's not disagreeing with paper Sayaka, paper Mami, and paper Kyoko, because they don't exist, they're HER, everything they say are HER thoughts, SHE thinks that this is the ideal world, deep down she wants to stay here, and she hates herself for it, viewing it as weakness.

we cut to Homura kneeling beneath goddess Madoka, Homura views Madoka as a goddess, not just in a descriptive sense, but a prescriptive one. In her eyes Madoka is a perfect being deserving of reverence, her love for Madoka is yes, romantic, but also has undeniably religious elements to it

Homura reaching up towards the statue of goddess Madoka as she talks about her sacrifice, it's just, VERY religious, she's over here like "Madoka died for your despair, accept her into your heart as your lord and savior" and it's like, Homura, this is a really unhealthy way to view your crush

this flashes on screen "who is dreaming?" the reason these runes pop on screen at this point is because it's important to this scene specifically, Homura is essentially denouncing whoever is guilty of being, for lack of a better word, a sinner, so these runes prompt the question of who the "sinner" is, and of course, it is Homura

we cut to a boat on fire

we see little paper cutouts of people drowning, presumably the people who should be being saved right now but aren't

Homura caresses Madoka's legs very heterosexually, I will come back to this later

the Clara Dolls throw tomatoes at the statue and Homura while saying "god is dead" in German, this most obviously signifies the blasphemy of the sinner who created this world (Homura) it's also a Nietzsche quote (Nietzsche and Rebellion is a whole nother conversation though)

it's also worth pointing out that the Clara Dolls's antagonism towards Homura is likely symbolic of bullying, which considering the way Moemura acts, is almost definitely something she went through

remember that everything here is from Homura's mind, that tunnel of love didn't even exist a moment ago, it was created by Homura's mind, that includes where it led, Homura's mind created a tunnel of love while thinking about Madoka that led her to Madoka

Madoka jumps down and lands on Homura, she doesn't emote much, but we know for a fact that this caused A LOT of emotions in her. Remember that familiar I pointed out that wasn't doing much? Well once again, everything in here is part of Homura, representing a part of her mind

as Madoka sits up, we see the familiar excitedly dancing with sparklers, because well, gay

as I said I wanted to come back to the statue's legs later, this is why. Where Homura touched it is marked in inky black. Her devotion to Madoka, her love for her, represented by the caressing of her legs, has only dirtied the statue. She views her love as a dirtying force. And for a lesbian that canonically went to Catholic school, views herself as a demon, and her crush as a pure perfect goddess, that certainly has implications, internalized homophobia is only one possible reading of this scene, but it's the one I choose to go with.

that's the end, I hope you enjoyed!

#Madoka Magica #PMMM #puella magi madoka magica #madoka magica rebellion #madohomu #homumado #madoka kaname #Homura Akemi #analysis

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gemini-sensei · 3 months

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Everything Has Changed Pt. 2 | Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz x Chubby!LaRusso!Reader

○ Part 1 ○

CW: teen pregnancy, angst, forbidden/secret relationship, small enemies to lovers.

"Have you picked what book you're gonna read for the book report in Mrs. Sheete's class?" Hawk asked, reaching across his bed for the book list beside Reader. He looked at it as she hummed in response.

"Mhm," she let out softly, looking up.

She watched him closely, paying attention to the way his eyebrows knit up as he scanned the list. His eyes showed how bored he was with the titles their teacher had given them to choose from. It was quite amusing to watch as he steadily became a little frustrated.

He huffed and set the list aside. "That's bullshit. Everything on there is so fucking old. Why can't we read something, ya know, we can actually relate to?"

Reader smirked but tried to hide it. "I don't know. What would you read and find relatable?"

He looked up at her, unamused with her amusement simply because he didn't want to do the assignment. However, as she leant back on one hand, she used the other to cradle her just-beginning-to-show belly. It was showing to them, at least, when they were alone like this. She could be herself with him unlike any relationship she's had before, romantic or platonic. She could wear whatever she wanted, which included cute striped maternity shirts.

Perhaps he thought it was so cute because he bought it for her. When the opportunity arose to buy himself some new clothes, he'd opted to get her a few things too. He knew it wasn't easy for her get anything for herself with her overbearing family always around. They knew her parents were getting suspicious of her, thought that she was hiding something. So he got her a few shirts.

They were a little baggy, giving a little room for her to grow into. They were comfortable and she loved them, wearing them under an even baggier shirt when she went to school or around her house. Though they both knew that soon enough they wouldn't hide anything. She'd full them out and the fat of her belly would round out in a baby bump.

As he watched her now, understood what she was trying to convey in that simple action - cradling her precious little belly. No one else at their school would be able to read a book about being pregnant and relate to it.

He sighed and avoided her question. "Okay, so it doesn't really matter, right? I mean, it's not as if I could pick a book not on the list anyway."

"Sheete likes you a lot, so maybe you could," Reader suggested.

"No, I'll just pick one of these," he grumbled. She giggled as he took up the paper again and looked at it. "What are you reading?"

"Little Women."

He hummed, then dropped the list. It floated away and fell to the floor. He leaned over their textbooks and notebooks and assignments, grinning at her. "I guess I'll read that too."

"Oh yeah?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. "Why? So you can cheat off my paper?"

He chuckled. "No, of course not. Though having someone to talk over all the riveting topics sounds like a great idea."

She laughed and leaned closer to him. "Sure, whatever you say. I think you're just copying me." Then she pecked his lips. "But I don't mind."

He smiled. "Good, I really don't wanna read anything else."

And he kissed her, supporting himself on both hands so she didn't have to lean over into him too much. His hands, balled into fists, sunk into the mattress and moved all of their school supplies, not that either of them cared. They became too involved in each other to notice or do anything about it, even though the kiss wasn't vigorous or very empassioned. It was sweet and simple and lovely.

She loved it.

As the weeks passed, Reader grew bigger. Her belly rounded out and the pudgy fat that once resided there became a hard bump. It was harder to hide but she managed.

She knew the longer she let the secret dwell, the worse it would be when she told people. But she didn't care. She loved having the pregnancy just her hers and Hawk's. It was theirs to keep, theirs to smile about in his car and talk about in whispers. No one else was involved and it was perfect. It was amazing.

What wasn't so amazing was a charity dinner her parents wanted to drag her and her siblings to for the evening. She didn't care how important it was to them or the business. After the long day she'd had, including a secret doctor's visit with Hawk, all she wanted to do was lay down and sleep. Her feet were killing her but it wasn't as if she could spring the pregnancy on her parents and ask them to go without her.

As she went through her wardrobe, she wandered around her room in nothing but her panties and a maternity shirt Hawk had gotten her. It was solid black but stretched just right to accommodate her bump. She got caught up at the mirror, looking at her reflection as she held her baby bump affectionately.

When she thought about it, she couldn't believe she'd hated Hawk so much before. His rivalry with the Miyagi-Do students wasn't her battle at all, no matter if Sam was in the middle of it all or not. She had no real reason to hate him and the same was true about him. He'd never really hated her, only acted like it because that was "what he was supposed to do" because of her family. She was a LaRusso and Cobra Kai was supposed to hate them for some reason. She chose not to worry with it anymore, especially since their little one was on the way.

She hoped the fighting would be over by the time they were born. As if that were the most pressing issue in all of this, but it was ever-present on her mind. It was all her father and sister could talk about, her friends were caught in the middle of it; Hell, sometimes it was the only thing the school was talking about. It was inescapable and she just wanted it to be over. For her baby's sake.

"Sweetheart, are you ready? We're gonna be late if you-" a voice said from behind her.

Reader turned with a startle, grabbing her shirt to cover her belly. However, it was too late. Her father had seen her bump.

He stared at her for a long moment, standing in her doorway froze. He pointed to her belly and asked, "Is that what I think it is?"

"Dad, I can explain," she said.

"Then start explaining," he said. He sounded lost, like his mind and body were disconnected. He stared at her expectantly nonetheless and waited for her to start talking.

"Um, well," she said, completely unprepared. Her hands shook and the shirt fell from her hands, revealing her bump once more. She averted her eyes, unable to look at her father. "I'm pregnant..."

He nodded, understanding that much. Perhaps he just had to hear her say it, but that didn't make the situation any better. He looked her over, mouth falling open. "You're so big. How... how could you hide this from us?"

"I'm not that far along, Dad, really. It's just because I'm fat," she said.

"You're not fat, sweetheart," he said, an automatic and well-meaning statement she'd heard her whole life. However, it was misplaced here.

Reader rolled her eyes and huffed, though she felt like she was trying to catch her breath. She was halfway between screaming and crying. This wasn't exactly how she wanted her dad to find out. "I'm fat, Dad. Deal with it because that's not even the problem here."

He was trying to give himself time to let it sink in. That's what Reader told herself, but as she saw the lost look leave his eyes, anger settled in them. And she knew why.

"Who did this?"

"Dad-"

"No, Reader, tell me. Who did this to you?"

"He didn't do this to me," she said, scoffing. "We fucked."

He cringed and waved his hands in the air, not wanting to hear her vulgar description of it. "Sweetheat-"

"Who is he!?"

"Hawk!"

Everything stopped. The air grew tense. Her boyfriend's name left her lips before she could fully think about it and her heart sank, fear gripping it.

Then Daniel turned and marched downstairs.

"Dad!" Reader went after him. She wasn't waddling yet, but it felt like it was just around the corner if she was being honest. "Dad, stop! Where are you going!?"

"Daniel?" Amanda's voice came from the foyer.

Daniel walked past her and grabbed his keys, angrily opening the front door.

"Dad! Please don't do something stupid!"

He turned to look at his daughter, shaking his head. "I'm gonna do anything stupid, dear. I'm just gonna go have a little talk with that- that selfish, moronic, violent snake!"

He slammed the door behind him and Reader jumped. Amanda came to her side and hugged her, only then noticing her bump.

"Oh, honey..."

"Mom, he's gonna kill him!" Reader cried, tears quickly welling in her eyes and falling down her cheeks. She shook horribly and cried in her mother's arms, inconsolable.

"Shh, he's not going to hurt anyone, honey," Amanda whispered, rubbing her daughter's back soothingly. She kissed her head, unsure if she could trust her own words. They were in uncharted territory, and knowing her husband, there was no telling what he'd actually do to the boy. "It's going to be okay."

"But he-he thinks Ha-Hawk is just a punk that knocked me up!" Reader cried. "But we love each other! We really do! This didn't just ha-happen because of something totally stupid! He-he takes such good care of me, M-mom!"

"What's going on?" Sam asked, coming down the stairs. She stopped as she saw her distraught sister crying in their mother's arms.

"Sam, sweetie," Amanda said softly, looking up at her. "Go get your sister some clothes."

"And my phone!" Reader yelled, not meaning too.

She had to warn Hawk that her father was coming for him. She didn't know how he was going to find her boyfriend, but knowing her dad, he had his ways. He always knew where to look and if she knew her dad at all, she'd look for a snake in its den. She just hoped karate training was over.

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vasito-de-leche · 2 months

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Hi! I read about your super cool Self Aware R1999 AU and it got me thinking about what Sonetto would be like, since I have a 100% bond with her in the suitcase.

Would she try to keep normalcy? Have a brand new idle line? Perhaps pull a Monika DDLC and start writing poetry where she tries to grapple with the fact that there’s an eldritch being puppeteering her best friend?

;R1999 SONETTO - Self-Aware AU

Headcanons about how Sonetto would act upon becoming self-aware. Related to this Self-Aware AU post.

glad you like the AU! this was a nice chance to explore Sonetto's character more <3

To organize my thoughts better, I gotta talk about Sonetto first for a bit.

I definitely talked about this with a few friends, but Sonetto is a wonderful character to me because I both dislike and feel for her a lot - especially in the new 1.4 Main Story update. The emphasis the game puts into her role as a military dog (raised to follow orders and die for a cause she doesn't truly understand) and a lost puppy (a curious and dependant child believing her caretakers have the best of intentions) really lives up to the way she portrays these same traits. Yes, it's awful to see her continue to perpetuate the harmful ideas the Foundation taught her, but it makes sense. Yes, it's lovely to see her slowly break away from everything she's ever known, and yet revert back to her habits because change is difficult. The way she works perfectly as a foil to Vertin, it's so good!

To me, Sonetto is a character that resists change, while yearning for it at the same time. That's why her Medium is curiosity, after all. It's so lovely and ironic to see THE perfect example of a Foundation martyr being set up for failure in something that they couldn't have even foreseen, her own Medium, her own innate curiosity.

So with this in mind, I think that within the Self-Aware AU ... I think she would be able to deal with this sudden awareness of everything being fake, because her first reaction would be to assume there's something wrong with herself for thinking something so outlandish, so beyond what she was taught. Sonetto would still resist this change - if this is a game, then she's not meant to be aware of it, therefore she's the one at fault and perhaps, broken in a way.

Maybe "broken" is too heavy of a word, I imagine it's more like she believes she broke the rules by gaining this level of sentience. That it' wasn't supposed to happen in the first place.

How would she act overall?

I feel like Sonetto would be relatively fine upon becoming sentient because of this, she'd be shaken but would continue to do as expected and follow the script like a proper little chess piece, one of the many cogs needed in the machine - her reasoning is simple: if everyone who is self-aware began to act out, there wouldn't be a game to play. And what would happen to her friends, then? If this stability that the plot and script brings is suddenly gone?

There would be times where she might slip up, but they'd be very subtle changes in the her dialogue - perhaps the inflection of her voice, rather than the words - she might pause for longer to think, to consider whether to do anything outside of what she's expected to. But that's about it.

The problem begins when she finds out (or is told) that the Foundation had known this truth about the world they live in for longer than she's been alive. Sonetto remains docile entirely to keep that order and harmony she's been raised to maintain, but to find out that the very people who taught her that have known and done nothing but lie to everyone - that would be the catalyst for her.

Personally, I like to think that this is something she figures out on her own, rather than being told. A truth she must face on her own instead of just accepting someone else's words.

Her behaviour would still largely remain the same whenever she knows she has a part to play, but in those moments when she knows there's no "camera" looking at her, Sonetto would... sit there. WIth the way I've interpreted Sonetto, she's a character that struggles to actually have an identity outside of the Foundation's training, so now that this is something she can't rely on, she's at a loss as to what to do with this newfound freedom.

I imagine this is when other arcanists who were self-aware before her would start reaching out to Sonetto and slowly give her that stability she needs.

On the subject of Sonetto's relationship with Vertin.

The way I interpreted Sonetto and Vertin's dynamic, I don't see them as best friends!

From reading back some scenes and transcribing most of CH 03 of the Main Story, it feels like both Sonetto and Vertin have always found themselves in a one-sided relationship: when they were kids, Sonetto rejected Vertin's attempts at becoming friends because of their differences, even if they were both curious about each other. They never striked me as close. Now that years have passed, Vertin treats Sonetto similar to how she treats everyone else, while Sonetto explicitly wants to be closer to Vertin due to what happened when they were kids.

To me, Vertin has shown more emotion to Schneider and Madam Z than to Sonetto. There's this one-sided dynamic again.

In the context of the AU, I think Sonetto finding out about what Vertin goes through with this entity and this role that the game forced upon her, she would double down on her feelings to protect Vertin. There's a lot of guilt involved, since - once again - that's what the Foundation teaches to all orphan arcanists, to repent for their unruly and destructive existence.

I think Sonetto would feel guilty for not gaining sentience sooner, while Vertin has been struggling with this heavy weight for God knows how long. She would recontextualize everything about Vertin, her actions and the differences that constantly got her into trouble as a child, her desire to escape - attributing all of it to this entity that follows her. Because I do think that Sonetto idolizes Vertin to a degree that fuels this one-sided dynamic between them, not out of malice of course, just like a puppy.

So in the end, Sonetto would resent the Player and worry even more for Vertin, now using this as a justification for acting out of line and out of script, as Vertin's self-imposed protector.

It would take Sonetto a looooooong time to do anything with her sentience and freedom, beyond continuing to support Vertin. Her poems and her art would reflect this progress slowly, but yeah, not a lot of noticeable changes.

Reaching 100% Bond with Sonetto.

This is a very conflicting event for Sonetto, I'd say.

The more attention you pay to her, the more aware she becomes of your influence - and now she has to come to terms with the fact that there is no way of separating you from Vertin. She can't free Vertin from this fate, and it doesn't look like she wants that to happen either, but it eats Sonetto from inside out. Because she doesn't understand, and she wants to know why this is the way things are meant to be.

When it comes to reaching 100% Bond with her, or levelling her up and so on, I don't think she'd pay much attention to the mechanical aspect of it all. She's a skilled arcanist, she's the first important character the game gives to you during the tutorial stages, she knows just how important her Disarm ability can be to win a battle - of course you would want her on your team.

But as she slowly spends more time with Vertin and the Player, I think Sonetto would start to wonder about the outside world. They're small, little and impulsive thoughts in the back of her mind, like wondering if you too have someone in this fictional little world that you care about enough to see the story through the end. Are you capable of loving someone that can't reach out to you nor acknowledge your presence? Isn't it cruel, for those who remain blind to the truth, to be so loved and cherished by you?

Do you read the newspaper the same way Vertin does? Do you care about her? About her goals and dreams and thoughts?

This is the only way Sonetto can reconcile this resentment she has for you: through Vertin. I think Vertin would eventually notice all these subtle changes, the way Sonetto never looks truly happy whenever she looks at Vertin, looking above as if she could catch a glimpse of the Player. And Vertin would help through the whole process, easing up to sentience as a whole, to accepting the Player's existence as just something that is there, neither good or bad.

While she's one of the very few who has no trouble differentiating your actions and influence from Vertin's own free will, she would eventually come to respect your choices. Doing her best and beyond whenever you choose her to battle, because now the stakes are higher - now, she's choosing to fight for something she fully understands and cares about.

I like to think that Sonetto can't hear you, but she might be able to see you. Little glimpses here and there, when she happens to look up at the sky, and she sees you cheering after beating that one level that's been giving you a headache. I like to think that she would share these details about you with Vertin, if only to ease her own mind about the complex dynamic you have with THE Timekeeper.

But at the end of the day, this is progress and these are many changes that happen out of your field of vision. Perhaps, one day, Sonetto will gather the courage to thank you for taking care of Vertin when no one else would.

#reverse 1999 #reverse: 1999 #reverse 1999 x reader #self aware au #reverse 1999 sonetto #sonetto

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wheatnoodle · 1 year

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part 2!!

read part 1 here

—

it takes four days before somebody notices anything is wrong.

it’s keith of all people. steve had called him at the beginning of the week to tell him he was sick and wouldn’t be in for a few days. keith told him three days. it’s day four and he’s stomping up from the back room. he looks behind the line, whips his head around and scans the parking lot. with a hefty sigh, he snatches up one of the landlines, punching in numbers with much more force than necessary.

it rings a few times before being sent to the voice message machine. robin watches him from the counter.

“harrington. it’s…” he checks his watch, “11:30. you were supposed to be here at 9:00. i’ve called like a million times. get here or find a new job,” keith says before slamming the phone down.

“who shoved a stick up your ass this morning?” robin asks, her arms crossing over her chest.

“harrington. you seen him lately?” keith said with a huff.

“no. why?” she furrows her brows, standing up straighter at the mention of her best friend. now that she thinks about it, when did she see him last? the bonfire? did he make it home okay? what if he crashed his car and he’s dead in a ditch? is he sick? and she’s not taking care of him? oh god, what if his parents are home?

“he was out the past couple days, was supposed to be back in today. clearly he’s not, and i can’t get in touch with him,” keith shook his head, annoyance dripping off his very being.

“maybe i can call some of our friends to go check on him,” robin says, mainly to herself, and grabs the phone keith was just using. there’s a notecard taped under the counter with all the party’s house phone numbers, even the byers’ home all the way across the country. she pulls it off, reading through it and typing in dustin’s phone number. “c’mon c’mon c’mon…”

“henderson’s, this is claudia,” dustin’s mother answers, her voice as bright and cheery as always.

“hi, ms.h. it’s robin. um…is dustin around?” she tries to keep her voice even, even puts a smile on her face in hopes it makes everything sound okay.

“of course, honey! let me go get him for you.” the sound muffles for a few seconds as claudia calls for her son, pressing the phone to her chest. robin can hear the smallest bits of their conversation before the phone is handed off.

“robin? what’s up?” dustin’s voice filters through the receiver. he sounds happy to hear from her, but of course he doesn’t know what to expect. robin’s calling? in the middle of a work day? that doesn’t happen.

“hey, dustin! quick question, have you talked to steve recently?” robin asks and brings a hand up to chew on her nails, a bad habit she gets from her dad. her mom always tries to pull her hands from her mouth.

“no, last time was at the fire. why, what’s going on?” he doesn’t seem happy anymore. his voice drops quiet while he talks, like he’s waiting for robin to drop an upside down related bombshell on his morning.

“oh. well he was supposed to be in today but hasn’t showed. not picking up the phone either. i was just wondering if he’d said anything to you.”

“no, he hasn’t said anything. i’ll go check on him, i got nothing else going on today. i’ll radio when i see him,” dustin says. robin’s nodding along before she remembers he can’t see her. “robin. he’ll be okay.”

“i know. i know, i do. i just worry about him,” robin says truthfully and her shoulders deflate with a sigh. she runs her fingers through her hair, closing her eyes and tugging on the strands.

“i do too. i’ll get back to you.” and with that, the dial tone sounds. robin’s chewing her lip as she puts the phone back and gets ready to handle the incoming customers

—

dustin knows the route to steve’s house like the back of his hand and it takes him less than fifteen minutes to bike over there. he hops off once he reaches the end of the harrington’s long, unpaved driveway, walking his bike up the rest of the dirt trail. he always hated this part, especially at night. giant trees would loom over and every single one seemed to hold some kind of animal making some kind of weird noise. also way too close to where will went missing all those years ago for his liking.

the first thing dustin notices when he approaches the house is the lack of a car in the driveway. the familiar maroon bmw is nowhere in sight. odd. steve wouldn’t lie about being sick to get out of work and then go get caught driving around instead. maybe it was just in the shop.

he walks up to the red door and starts pounding on it.

“steeeeeve! steve, it’s dustin!” the kid yells, his fist continuing to slam against the wood. he waits a few seconds, gets no response, and repeats. he’s out there for ten minutes before accepting that he was, in fact, not going to answer the door. he takes his walkie from the side pocket of his backpack and switches to the main scoops troop channel.

“robin, it’s dustin. he’s not answering the door, so i’m going in. over,” he says and tucks it back in his pocket.

“keep me posted. over.”

he pulls his key ring from his shorts, flipping through to the gold key to the harrington house. dustin sticks the key in, twists and opens. it creaks on its hinges.

the second dustin steps inside, he’s hit with how warm it is in the house. how has he not turned on the ac?! it’s like a million degrees in here! he must be like dying if he’s actually sick and it’s this warm here.

“steve?! steve! are you here, man? it’s dustin,” he calls out as he starts his ascent up the stairs. “steeeeeve!”

no response. just echoes of his own voice bouncing back in his ears. what is going on? it’s eerily quiet, the silence making the blood rush in his ears. dustin approaches steve’s door. it’s cracked an inch or so.

“steve?” dustin says quietly. he places his palm on the door, gives it a gentle push so it swings open.

the room is empty. everything is spotless.

pictures of the kids are gone from the mirror on the wall.

the closet devoid of brightly colored sweaters and well-loved sneakers.

dustin’s eyes are wide as saucers, jaw dropped wide enough to catch flies. his hands fall to his sides and he doesn’t even try to stop them from trembling.

“st-eve?” his voice cracks. blue eyes are flooded with tears that won’t quite fall but certainly make it hard to see. “STEVE?”

the walkie is back in his hand.

“robin. this is dustin. i think i might have a code red. over,” he whimpers into the walkie. his free hand pushes under his hat, tangling in sweaty curls. “robin, i have a code red! over!”

“dustin? it’s robin, what’s going on? is steve okay? over.”

“he’s- he’s gone? n-nothing is here? i’m- robin, his room is empty.” he doesn’t care that he’s now openly crying into the receiver, fat tears rolling down his flushed cheeks.

“i’m on my way.”

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #dustin henderson #stranger things fic #steve harrington fanfic #stranger things fanfiction #steddie #later tho

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srbachchan · 2 months

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DAY 5843

Jalsa, Mumbai Feb 16/17, 2024 Fri/Sat 4:03 am

Many send greetings and wishes for Basant Panchami - the day Abhishek was born, was that auspicious day - and all obviously desire a response ..

But the volume of work is large and time consuming, hence an acknowledgement here on the Ef platformic Home ..

The day begins in the hours of laziness .. and matures to some discussions on management .. not having any presence or education in this rather complicated sphere .. it never has, or never shall be, understood by the rest ..

But .. the argument is that just when you become a recognised face, an entire Universe is created around it ..

For, it is assumed that the individual has been gifted with solutions and answers to all that needs them .. at birth ..

Wrong !!

No .. we are not proficient for this job or work .. dumb as hell and immature in its outlook .. we consider the advice given by those in the echelons of management ..

But choosing the right people, and extracting the work protocol from them is another management task ..

So there is reliance on others of trust to find and appoint such to be able to manage affairs, without giving any stress to the creator .. in a sense giving the individual an apparatus that gives the personality, relief from day to day running of his schedule and curriculum and protocol .. and an entire gamut of work now being handled by the TEAM - an oft used word in today's times .. bringing sufficient relief for the professional to have the freedom of thought and mind to conduct what he or she feel about their work .. and to be conducted in a manner that takes care ..

When my own choice of recruiting individuals has been, and is, a most trying experience .. I would be the happiest to find that my management, looks after, all else and gives me peace of mind to concentrate on what is believed to be my forte ..

😒

It is all very well to conceive and ideate what creatively may be of interest to me .. but does it also attract a similar sentiment with the rest .. is what my dilemma is !

In today's world there is no dearth of set ups, organisations in consultancy , that take charge of the situation and brings the joy and independence, from what seems to me to be far too complicated ..

I also feel that, many offer services in their grace towards me .. and I never feel comfortable to be seeking obligation from any other, even when the gravest condition is blown upon , coerces you to share the issue with those that are in proficiency related positions ..

Yes, there are dime a dozen organisations that readily take up this job and bring it to fruition .. but how to demonstrate to them what is it that gives comfort .. for, there is no time for trial and error .. now ..

And ever the fear , whether I am losing something or not, in having gone about it in a systematic professional manner ..

Many give opinion, that if the boat sails safe and comfortably in the oceans of the existent Universe .. why rock the boat at all ..

And the dilemma again .. in finding out that what was before, was the best methodology, than what is being desired now ..

Ahh .. life is so complicated .. !!

And then the learnings from Babuji and the return to his thoughts and wisdom .. make way and suddenly everything falls into place ..

For I am certain whenever any of us has faced an issue, the first thought that comes to mind is .

"what would Babuji and Ma have done in such decision making situations .."

And suddenly everything falls into place ..

The human psychology ever thrashes any fixed or formed ideas, and thoughts on issue ..

The most oft repeated being ..

" when I have 1x .. how has the other got 3x ..

And this becomes the base of diffident thinking, which propels one to compete and fight to beat .. and win ..

BUT .. just as you have succeeded in this trail and laughing your way to the bank , nature throws another sidewinder gauntlet moment , challenging all that you may have felt comfortable with ..

Hence either you get out of bed and determine the mind and body to fight .. or merely accept the condition, lie back quilted , and reminisce the days gone by ..

Remember .. enough is never enough ..

Love and more ..

Amitabh Bachchan

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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 1 year

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Ok no let me explain you a thing.

I can't take it. I literally can't take this moment without making a sound somewhere in the back of my throat. It's the cutest thing ever and it's this frame here that makes it.

Look, I know this is Wan. I know Wan isn't really canon and this is the preschool episode so it's even less so. But there's something in here that is an absolutely canon thing Akutagawa does.

The scene starts off with Akutagawa's typical reverence and excitement that Dazai is sitting near him. Nothing particularly notable there. But then Dazai gets excited by what's going on and Akutagawa gives him this look and I just can't take it man.

Because that's a genuinely fond look. He's happy for him. He's happy Dazai is enjoying himself.

And that's not just a Wan thing. He says along those lines to Kyouka in one of my all-time favourite BSD scenes in general.

It just. I just have a lot of feelings about that. This is a guy who, we know from Heartless Cur and the beginning of Beast, has very little in the way of emotion - but when he does feel, it's rather all-encompassing, even overwhelmingly strong. Things like rage and desperation. It's raw survival instinct.

But then he has. This too.

Here's the thing. In the preschool chapter, silly as it is, Dazai is still fixated on suicide. He has the noose, just doesn't speak about it openly. So, it's probably quite rare that Dazai shows genuine enjoyment the way he did here - and that's worth that small smile.

In the main universe, Akutagawa remembers how Kyouka hated herself to the point of asking to be killed, then sees how fierce she is about defending her new life and self, and decides that he's glad for her.

It really means something to me that one of the very few relational emotions he allows himself to feel is happiness and pride on others' behalf.

It roots itself less in compassion or happiness itself and more in a sense of respect... but remember that Akutagawa hardly gives his respect easily. He gives his respect only to those he considers strong, and in nearly every battle, he finds himself disappointed. What he wants is kind of contradictory - he wants a worthy opponent, so someone who poses a strong challenge to him to prove his own worth as one who will never be weak again... and yet, when they lose against him, he's often disappointed they did not succeed or fight harder, and looks down on them.

Atsushi's motive, or what he initially thinks his motive is, is disappointing to him at first - Akutagawa believes he is trying to prove himself as worthy of living through someone else's acceptance and berates him for it. But that's... exactly what he has been doing. Later on, he continues to question Atsushi for his motives, in yet another of one of my favourite scenes.

He asks him over and over - "why?" And is not satisfied until Atsushi reveals that he's also looking to get rid of the shadow of the orphanage director that follows him like a haunting - that trauma? All that pain thrown in his face? He is fighting to overcome it. He is fighting via proof and change because Atsushi wants to live, and to not have to feel ashamed of that. And that's what it took for Akutagawa to trust him and respect him enough to transfer Rashoumon to him.

I think, on some level, Akutagawa is invested in seeing whether Atsushi will succeed in this. And I think, in spite of everything between them, he will be glad for him if he does.

I just really love this aspect to his character, because while he searches for strength in violence and power and physical skill, it means on a deeper level, he actually sees joy and resistance in the face of despair as true strength that's worth acknowledging.

I want him so badly to accept that as true strength within himself in the main timeline.

I also love it because Beast confirms that Akutagawa would do anything for his sister and I am now free to imagine Gin telling her brother all the things she was learning and how she was slowly connecting to the Black Lizard and feeling overwhelming pride for her but not really expressing that but Gin knowing that's how he felt regardless, anyways that is all

Is this even coherent anymore? Oh well.

#me making an analysis that reads too much into wan number 28746837 #sorry but it drives me crazy and i needed to spew #bsd #bsd meta #...i guess.#bsd akutagawa #bsd dazai #bsd kyouka #bsd atsushi #bsd gin #storyrambles

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yuzukult · 1 year

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yours, but not yours 05 || csc & reader

title: yours, but not yours 05 pairing: choi seungcheol x fem!reader/oc genre: angst, fluff, eventual smut, fake dating!au, bad influence!seungcheol, nice guy syndrome!namjoon, mechanic!seungcheol wc: 8.0k summary: when a nice guy gets too overbearing, you’re stuck with the option of having a fake boyfriend. warnings: profanity a/n: ello it’s me do you remember me... anyways, hope you all enjoy!!

You never thought you’d find yourself in this position: in between Kim Yubin and Choi Seungcheol.

He stands there, outside of your bedroom door with his arms by his sides, sleeves still rolled up to his elbows from washing the dishes earlier. If you could see the enmity now, the steam whistling out of his ears would be visible. Heat radiates from his cheeks, fueled with all the things he’s been holding back since he’s learned about the Kim siblings, and he’s ready to combust.

“You’re fucking joking,” he practically spits.

“S-Seungcheol,” Yubin stutters; the palm of her hand pressing down against the cushion of your loveseat couch as she forces herself to stand straight. She swallows, throat bobbing up and down as her eyes grow wide, alcohol flushing out of her system the moment she sees Seungcheol walk out. There’s resemblance between her and a child cowering in fear at the sight of a strict parent as she holds her hands in front of herself, observing every move he takes. “You’re—You’re here,” she lets out a nervous laugh. “I…I thought nobody else was home.”

She states the obvious, and the evident expression wiped across Seungcheol’s face is enough without interrogating his feelings. Everything stills and grows silent—you could almost hear your neighbors talking to their families next door and the cars driving by on the main road from how quiet it gets.

“You… You know, I thought you looked familiar,” he begins leerily before shutting his lids with a heavy sigh that releases from his chest. Then his eyes—those chocolate colored irises are suddenly dark when they open, filled with vexation and fury when they land on Yubin. You’ve never seen him angry like this before. Disappointed, yeah, but this is a totally different side of him that he unravels. “After all the things I’ve heard about you—from your best friend, too—it makes sense. Fits together like a missing piece of the puzzle. Especially with Namjoon too, everything clicks,” his jaw tenses. “You’re Mrs. Kim’s kid. The bitch who owns the country club.”

“My mother isn’t a bitch,” Yubin says through her gritted teeth. Smoothing out her skirt with the warmth of her hands, she clears her throat and pushes the strand of hair behind her ear as if the messy rat’s nest would be resolved from the mere action. Even when he says harsh words about her own mother, she hides behind that sheer facade because she’s trying to sway him with her mellifluous tone. Was your best friend really that two-faced the entire time? “But I-I am. I see that you finally recognize me after all this time.”

“It’s a little hard to remember you without the flamboyant pink tutu and the pounds of makeup on your face. Your stylist team was just hired for the night, weren’t they?”

Mouth agape, she scoffs in disbelief.

Why does that attire sound familiar?

Then the memory comes back like a storm. It was years ago—you’d find out that Yubin’s parents were elitists. Their wealth was the explanation for her and Namjoon’s capability to afford such exorbitant things; from her red bottom heels to her Hermés Birken bag and Namjoon’s array of Aston Martins, Maybach Exeleros, and Bugattis, when she told you what her parents did for a living, it answered all your open questions. She and her family were part of a society back at home–her explanation glorified, you simply narrowed it down to her lifestyle consisting of a bunch of rich people trying to kiss each other’s asses over some golf clubs and banquets.

Although you couldn’t relate to any of Yubin’s upbringing and her current lifestyle, her personality was enough for you to stay as a friend. She was lonely; no amount of money in the world could pay for friendship that was pure and genuine so you stuck around. Yubin always said that the people who followed her around only remained because of her money, guilt and sympathy sinking in the pits of your stomach, becoming the main reason that you decided that you’d be her best friend. Everyone needs a friend–even your worst enemy.

You’d be a loyal friend to Yubin, despite all the times you desperately needed help financially and she wouldn’t even bat a lash. It wasn’t her money, so to speak, therefore asking Yubin to lend a hand was disrespectful if it meant digging into her parents’ wallets to fund for your necessities. Living in the basement of your uncle’s house, she came to visit you in the late hours of the night while knocking obnoxiously on the back door that led downstairs to your makeshift apartment. No headboard, sharing a bathroom with six other people who resided in that home, never having any privacy since the laundry room was your bedroom, having Yubin seated on the edge of your bed while dressed in head to toe designer was juxtaposing.

Honestly, at first, you were a bit taken aback from the sight of her.

Usually, she wouldn’t get dolled up like this. Her makeup was smeared, just as it was now, black mascara streaked down her cheeks that was brushed with a blush that didn’t fit her skin tone. The lipstick was a hot pink to match her dress, layers of tulle stacked atop each other that made her seem like she was a contestant for a pageant and left you wondering how something like that could include so many zeros behind the first number. She needed a new stylist – whomever hired her definitely had a personal vendetta against Yubin.

“He’s the one,” you vaguely recalled her hopelessly declaring, eyes sparkling under the shoddy lights in your room. The one bulb in the corner was flickering, and you made a mental note to yourself that you would ask your handyman neighbor if you could bum one off of him instead of noticing how blindly in love Yubin was. “He basically told me that he’d wait for me–that he never met a girl like me before. He made me feel like a princess, like I was worth something. He didn’t even care about the money! His family has enough on their own.”

And quite frankly, if you’d been paying attention, you would’ve remembered this and construed it differently. But your priority wasn’t your friend who claimed to have met her soulmate–the homework assignment due in 13 minutes–no wait, 12 minutes, was your main concern.

“Mmm, wow, that’s crazy,” you responded, and thinking back on it, you should’ve been more engaged and probed for more because now you’re paying for the consequences of your actions. It was terrible on your part because you’d been a bad friend by not listening but also missing all the red flags that she was practically waving in front of your face.

This angle of Seungcheol is peculiar; usually he’d throw a couple sordid jokes here and there then attempt to use pick up lines paired with a wink. He’s normally kind, in spite of the label fuckboy he tends to walk around with, in semblance to the ‘A’ in the Scarlet Letter. Seungcheol would wear this identity with pride, but he never failed to still remain respectful of everyone’s boundaries–even now he doesn’t change that, and that’s without the trademark.

Yet, as he stands here before Yubin, he’s like an entirely different person. He’s cold–easily mistaken for a draft, but your place was warm with the heat on blast. Your thick layer of clothes, locked windows and space heater in the middle of the apartment didn’t warrant the frosty air but that unopened invitation didn’t matter to his attitude.

Seungcheol narrows his gaze. “Not usually something a guy who’s in love with you would say, would it?”

“Seungcheol,” you call his name out sternly but he doesn’t give you an ounce of attention–a new move on his part, considering he claims to kiss the ground you walk on. “What’s going on?”

“I’m baffled,” he begins, shaking his head. “This whole time, you pretended to not know me, then you come and tell my girlfriend that I’m in love with you. What gives? Did your brother implant that in your head? Because it’s fucking seeming like the Kim siblings just love to lie to get things their way. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, does it?”

“Seungcheol,” you reiterate, hand on his protruding chest to ease him. The touch soothes him just barely, and he takes a step back. “I asked a question—what's going on?”

When he diverts his attention to you, his gaze softens. Shoulders loosening, breathing unlabored, he becomes like putty underneath your fingertips. Even though this thing between you both isn’t clear, one thing you know for sure is that you have an impact on him, whether he likes it or not. “Your friend here,” the way he labels Yubin your friend leaves a bitter taste on his tongue, “… is making shit up. I just wanna make it clear, I’un lead on chicks like her.”

“Chicks like her? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means…” he doesn’t want to flat out say it but he knows you won’t let this go without a straightforward response. It’s the old version of himself, the one he’s been so desperately trying to get you to forget and see that that isn’t who he is anymore. Seungcheol sucks in his cheeks, running his fingers through his hair frustratedly. “We met before you. My lifestyle was different then—which meant I wasn’t gon’ go chase a girl with the intention of wanting anything more than somethin’ temporary.”

The words don’t leave your mouth, but he knows what you’re thinking. “I’m not like that anymore, if that’s what’s going through your head.”

“Fine,” you step aside and look over at Yubin. “Explain yourselves. You don’t get to come into my house, drunk off your shits, and you,” pointing at Seungcheol, you click your tongue, “... you don’t get to leave without explaining her accusations. Start over, and don’t leave any details out.”

Seungcheol raises a brow at Yubin. “Should I be explainin’, or should you?”

She doesn’t respond, instead she opts for crossing her arms over her chest aggravatedly.

“I should’ve told you sooner,” Seungcheol sighs. There’s a reason why he doesn’t tell you anything about his family, and truthfully, he feels that it’s justified. Some things are enough to lure in people with impure intentions and some are enough to push them away. With you, he’s afraid of both outcomes. “My parents are a lot… more well off then I’ve led you to believe. My father owns a tech company and my mom owns her own fashion company,” and when he says the name of the brand, you can’t even hide when your hand covers your mouth in shock. “... And, I’m pretty sure you know that Yubin’s family associates with those in that tax bracket. So, of course, my mom wants to leave quite an impression on those in that… community,” Seungcheol says through his gritted teeth, the concept bitter in his mouth, “hence the constant tea parties, gatherings, fundraisers and galas. I can’t say that I share the same concerns as my parents, but… that’s my mom. So I attend them for her, despite the fact that I don’t really care about what they say about me–I care about how they view her.”

You roll your lips. “And how do they see her?”

“The woman with two sons who seem to let their dick speak instead of their heads.”

And… that’s where it hits.

This reputation he created for himself that began early in his youth precedes him. A player, a fuckboy, a guy who can’t seem to hold onto a girl—not because he’s unable to but it’s just what he wanted. Girls weren’t his problem, he was his own problem, and at the time, it didn’t feel like an issue either. He liked how fast paced his lifestyle was. There was no commitment required or expected, unlike everything else at home, but he never… made it clear to you that it’s why he chose that route. The only thing he’s ever explained was that he chose you to be the reason to quit that mentality.

“The pink tutu,” you roll your lips, tilting your head to the side before glancing over at Yubin. “Was that… was that the night of one of your mom’s fundraisers? Your mom… she mentioned something about how you didn’t have options for a date. Well, I could’ve sworn that’s what she said until you came to my apartment that night, talking about… how there’s this boy…”

Your shoulders drop when you put two and two together. “She meant you. Yubin went on about how there was this boy who basically professed his love to her, but there was something about him that he couldn’t change and swore she’d be able to.”

He scoffs. “And does that sound like me?”

It… doesn’t.

When you look at the person who you claim is your best friend, the epithet “best” and the identification “friend” doesn’t quite fit her anymore. She’s an adaptation of herself that you can’t get behind; the old Yubin who was shy, timid, and oftentimes needed your support suddenly… vanishes.

The key word you should’ve listened for was “basically.” He basically professed his love, he basically says that he’d wait for her, and he basically told her that he’s waiting for the right time to come back and be with her. As she was bawling her eyes out from her mother’s harsh words that evening, you realize it was a distraction from the assumptions she made with indirect descriptions that you missed so easily because you trusted her.

The silence is thick in the air. Both Yubin and Seungcheol anxiously wait to hear from you, hoping that you’d pick them to side with but you’re left with confusing thoughts.

“I’ll um… I’ll get you an Uber,” you finally say as you pull your phone out of your pocket, and Yubin’s face contorts to a baffled one. “You need to get home–it’s late, and I don’t think you’re in the right mindset to have this conversation.”

“I’m perfectly fine,” she snaps, but you’re already clicking the fast checkout option on the screen. “I can have this conversation. If everything he said to me was a lie, then what makes you think he won’t lie to you?”

You sigh. “I’m not having this conversation until you go home, drink some water, and get sober.”

And suddenly, that light that normally radiates from behind Yubin’s head fades.

In your eyes, despite all the things she’s done, Yubin has remained your best friend. Even with the issues you’ve had with her and Namjoon–you justified her actions, tried your best to understand what it’s like to be in her shoes, and without saying, you forgave her. It’s like an instinct, muscle memory–something you did unconsciously because how and why would Yubin, your best friend Yubin, the one who had your back for as long as you remember–how can Kim Yubin be the constant toxicity in your life? She was never like this before.

Or… has she always been and you’ve been too blinded by friendship to even realize?

“I appreciated you,” she begins, stepping in closer. The mascara that smears underneath the eyes isn’t the reason her gaze grows dark, it was her own doing. Her true colors are showing now, a gloom cloud casts over her as she finally says everything she’s been holding back until this very moment. “I admired you. I valued our friendship–I told you that I thought Namjoon was more fitting for you, and for good reason, too. I thought that we’d have that like–typical movie friendship where you’d end up with my brother, I’d be your maid of honor, and you’d be walking down the aisle in our parents’ backyard with Namjoon standing at the end of it.”

A look of incredulity appears on your face. “And what happens if I just… never end up with Namjoon? Have you ever thought about that?”

Yubin rolls her eyes. “It’s not that hard to convince you. You have a soft spot for me–I’m your best friend, the only one at that. Those other girls are just people you hang with, not people you trust. Even so, they all have the same opinion as I do–Namjoon is yours. You just need to get out of that head of yours and just listen.”

“Are you even listening to me?” you exasperate. You feel the heat burning through your skin, the tips of your ears warm from the anger boiling within. “I keep fucking telling you that I’m not interested in Namjoon–”

“You will,” she emphasizes. Your phone buzzes in your hand but your eyes don’t pull away from hers. “If you stop denying it, maybe you can stop this whole enemies to lovers mentality and finally let him love you. You’re always talking about self worth, but it feels like you don’t even recognize your own.”

Your phone vibrates again. Sneaking a glance at the screen, the timing of the Uber couldn’t be better. “Your ride is here. Get out.”

“I’m not done–”

“Go home, Yubin,” you state sternly through your gritted teeth. A wave of deja vu hits, almost like you’ve done this exact scenario before but with someone else. “I’ve–I’ve had enough.”

Right. You said the same words to Namjoon.

When she finally concedes and shuts the door behind her, your body releases the tension and you free the held breath from your lungs. Being in your twenties and lost in life was enough – having to figure out where you fit in the world, deciding whether or not someone is right for you, and if you want to spend the rest of your life with them (or… do you even want that for yourself?) was more than you needed on your plate, but dealing with your best friend trying to dictate every choice you make was only adding to the pressure. She’s supposed to make things easier, not harder.

As you lock the handle, you’re left with the next issue to tackle on your list.

Choi Seungcheol.

Where does this… leave the two of you? The situation was between him and Yubin, after all, but why did it feel like the indignation he’s radiating is toward you, too?

“I… I think Imma sleep in the garage,” he announces, walking over to the coat hook to grab his jacket. “I appreciate your offer of lettin’ me crash here–”

“— But what?” you interrupt, perplexed. You didn’t do anything wrong, so why are you paying the consequences of someone who did? “You’re–you’re pushing me away again. Did I do something?”

“I’m just —” he pauses for a moment to gather his thoughts. When he speaks this time around, his voice is gentler and calmed. Folding the jacket over his arm, he lets out a sigh. “Do you know why I fell for you?”

You blink blankly. It’s the question you ask constantly but Seungcheol never gives a straightforward answer, of course you’re curious and have no idea how. “Why?”

“Because you’re simple,” Seungcheol begins, hands slipping into the front pockets of his sweatpants. “Not in a bad way, but in a good way. Simple as in — you’re not living the type of life that my parents live and want me to. Every action I make is judged — from what I decide to do after high school, what girls I date, and what I just want to do generally. You? The simplicity goes down to the point where you’re craving a corn dog in the middle of the night so you pop a frozen one into the air fryer. Even when I poke fun at how much ketchup you pour, all you do is give me the side eye and continue.”

Rolling your lips, you’re left clueless. Where’s he going with this?

“I wanna love someone I admire,” and somehow, with just a few words, there’s a twinge in your chest. “I admire you. I admire the way you live your life — in spite of some drama—you live it in simplicity. You drive a car that could be replaced, but you choose not to. ‘It works’ is your mentality, not that it’s out of date and you want the newest and prettiest toy at the dealership. You’re just unapologetically you.”

“That doesn’t make me special,” you interject, and Seungcheol lets out a laugh. “What’s so funny?”

“It doesn’t,” he clarifies. It’s a bit offensive, but the reality of things. What makes you so different from all the other girls he’s met–how is it that you stick out the most from the plethora of women he’s encountered? “That’s just a portion of what makes up you. You’re not special because you’re simple – you’re special to me because… you make me feel comfortable. Like I don’t gotta flaunt my money around you, and you could say that about anyone, ‘cause you’re right, you can. But I’un feel that way about them. I feel that ‘bout you.”

“But you… you don’t want to be with me right now. You said so yourself – you need space because you can’t tell if my feelings are real.”

“Because I really can’t,” he admits solemnly, eyes trailing elsewhere as he licks his lips. “This whole thing with Yubin – fine, whatever. I’ll deal with her and Namjoon for you, but that’s ‘cause I like you. I wanted to be with you in the beginning because I thought you’d give me an ounce of a chance and you were just unsure since Namjoon kept putting things into your head. But I know now that it was your decision, and when you ignored my feelings toward you, that was your choice. Not Namjoon’s doing, not Yubin’s. You refuse to accept anything I’ve said, and it makes it hard to believe that you woke up one day and embraced me. You didn’t – you just feel guilty. You thought you lost me for a moment, and now you’re wondering if you’re missing out.”

The silence between the two of you is loud. It lasts for a couple minutes before you finally break it, words shaky and uncertain.

“What does this mean for us?”

As much as you hate to admit it, you sort of miss him. His cologne, the scent of the gel in his hair, the smug look on his face, and his fatuous pick up lines were just a few things to name off the top of your head, but the reality of it all is that you miss him. He used to just be some contemptible guy in your life that wouldn’t fuck off, but now, you’re suddenly wishing that he’d be by your side, chasing for your attention. You never know what you have until it’s gone, right?

You haven’t seen Seungcheol in over a week.

And blaming Yubin for him disappearing from your life in minutes is easy, but the real answer would be that you drove him away.

The garage door is closed, but you can hear the clanging of his tools from inside and the fluorescent lights beaming through the cracks of the framing gives it away that he’s here. Rent was due yesterday, and instead of calling you up with a tacky line to meet up with him so that he could transfer the money to you online (it was totally unnecessary, but he claims he wanted to see your pretty face), he just… sent you money. Nothing more, nothing less. Seungcheol wants space—he made that very clear.

At work, your mind works overtime.

The glass walls of your office look out into the workspace shared among your coworkers – the promotion was great in terms of what’s now written on your paycheck, but the position change came with an isolated office and your Outlook inbox incessantly ringing with notifications of new emails. The clacking against the keyboards, clicking of mouses, soft murmurs of those who visit another’s cubicle to stir up a conversation and the gossip that occurs by the water cooler isn’t audible anymore. The peacefulness is hostile – the heavy sounds of traffic, honking, and bystanders on the street below are usually a distraction, but today, Seungcheol causes the commotion in your mind.

What did this mean for you? For you and Seungcheol? Are you supposed to apologize? Do you… start chasing him?

But that would make you seem soft and like every other girl… right?

You scratch your head.

Guys are always confusing—you’ve yet to find a guy that’s straightforward and honest… that is until you met Seungcheol. He tells you exactly how it is; from his endeavors in his past life up until his feelings for you presently, he doesn’t hide anything from you besides the extent of his parents’ wealth. But he had his reasons for that, right? Were they even justifiable?

Even so, that didn’t matter to you.

But why are you having a hard time reading an uncomplicated yet complicated guy?

Before your thoughts could spiral further, one of your managers knocks on the door with an anxious smile. When you gesture him to come in, he eases his steps toward you slowly.

“Heyyy,” he begins, dragging his greeting. You spot a twitch in his jaw; it tightens and loosens with the occasional gulp. Dokyeom is a great boss — what you thought was impossible, separating management and friendship, he made it work. “Listen, remember that client we had a couple months ago? The software company – the one where –”

“Yeah,” you interrupt with a raised brow. Whenever Dokyeom gets nervous, he tends to add information into the conversation that may be necessary for someone who hadn’t been involved in anything earlier and needs context, but you weren’t one of those people this time. “I remember them. What’s up?”

“This… this may be a lot to ask from you but they’re asking us to attend their banquet this weekend. We helped increase their numbers, and they want us to celebrate with them.”

“I… don’t really want to go,” you confess, and Dokyeom plops into the seat across from your desk. “I haven’t been in the mood to… socialize.”

He puffs his cheeks. “Well, what if I told you that this isn’t something I’m asking from you, but demanding that you do?”

Well, this is different.

“If you’re making me, do I even have room for objection?”

He responds with a ‘no,’ a smile stretching on his face from ear to ear. “But you can at least go with Rowoon from business development. He said he’d be more than happy to accompany you.”

Truthfully, that doesn’t persuade you.

When Dokyeom leaves, not taking ‘no’ for an answer, the thought still doesn’t excite you. Why would you want to go to a banquet to celebrate the success of your project with a coworker while you’re occupied with barely making it to work? The drag marks from the bed to the front door says it all.

And when you’re at the water cooler, attempting to refill the 64oz Hydroflask (which you regret buying now, mostly because you’re stuck standing there for a solid 5 minutes because of the slow flow of the stream), your coworker, Hani, stops by. Despite the amount of people you dislike having small talk, Hani is one of the few you don’t despise.

“So,” she begins, popping her lips. “I heard you got roped into attending that party for the Choi project.”

You groan, a hand on your waist as you stare at the brutally lethargic current. “Yeah, tell me about it. Dokyeom insists I go — he said he can’t because his wife won’t let him. Something about finding a rich girl there and leaving her. So I’m left with the option of going alone or going with Rowoon.”

Instead of seeing it from your perspective, Hani sees the glass half full. With a raised brow, she taps your shoulder in a joking manner. “You do realize what Rowoon looks like, right?”

In all honesty, you haven’t. With the hybrid workplace being the new thing, you can’t quite say you can identify all the workers in your office, especially when turning on your webcams is optional. “Um… not really. Seen him a couple times on Teams, but I think his camera was broken whenever we were on a call together.”

Hani is quick to pull her phone out of her back pocket; tapping in her passcode at the speed of light, you recall the last time you mentioned a guy you were seeing was found within seconds of her instantaneous instagram searches. “Internet stalking is a skill that can’t always be taught. You need to feel the vibes,” she said last time, and now she showcases the talent once again. Within mere seconds, she pulls up Rowoon’s Instagram account and shoves her phone in your face.

Oh. He is cute.

He’s got the sweet gentleman look to him; the gelled hair, soft smile, and most of the pictures on his feed consisted of him, food, or a pretty skyline behind his equally attractive silhouette. In one of the photos, you swear you almost heard a ding! sound at the sight of his pearly white teeth. Why does he look like a model for someone who works a corporate job?

“You’re going with him,” she states. “He’s hot. He’s sweet. Smart. Available,” Hani practically sings. “You’re single, too. Please don’t pass up on this opportunity because of some boy.”

You blink blankly in shock. “How–What makes you think I’m turning down Rowoon’s company because of a guy?”

“You got them dejected eyes. Those dejected eyes with hints of love in it. Almost like you got your heart broken or something. I’ll find him on Instagram later–first, we need to get you to go to that banquet with Rowoon.”

Puffing up your cheeks, you pull out the bottle when the water nears the brim. Hani has good intentions but you don’t know if you should be appreciative or find it overbearing. Nonetheless, the one thing Hani doesn’t have in common with your other friends is that she doesn’t probe about Seungcheol–even if she already speculated what could’ve happened. Instead, she offers you another option that’ll keep your mind busy.

Maybe Rowoon would be a good distraction. It doesn’t hurt to have some eye candy, right? After all, where you stand with Seungcheol is a blur — he doesn’t want to see nor talk to you, and you haven’t given him a good reason to (in his terms, of course). But what’s the point then? Why do you have to try so hard to “win” him over when he insists on being the one who does it? It’s not like he believes you and your feelings anyway. How is it that suddenly the tables have turned? Either way, you’ll regret this decision to see Rowoon a lot less than agreeing to be Seungcheol’s fake girlfriend.

You smooth out the wrinkles of your dress with the warmth of the palm of your hands in front of the full length mirror in your living room. This black slip with an open back is more provocative than you’d like, but after the dresses that had a broken zipper, grass stain (from what?), torn up hemline, and just simply didn’t fit, this was the best option and you weren’t allowed to turn back on the invitation now.

Puffing up your cheeks, you grab your camel trench coat from your closet. Rowoon should be picking you up any minute now, and honestly, even though this isn’t really a date, he’s got you nervous with your heart racing in its beats.

But not in the same way as Seungcheol —

Wait, pause. Why’d you bring up Seungcheol?

Tonight is supposed to be everything but Seungcheol, and the fact you unconsciously brought him up only makes you seethe.

Rowoon doesn’t have the aroma remnants from cigarettes; his cologne wafts underneath your nose, a blend of citrus and sandalwood, he’s the definition of a man, someone independent, emotionally intelligent, and overall full of kind and generosity. He opens the door for you when you exit the car, quickly shuffling out of the front seat just to do it. Rowoon doesn’t recklessly ride a motorcycle, no, instead, he drives a reliable car – granted, it’s BMW and the amount of times you heard Seungcheol shit talk that manu–

Wait, why are you thinking about Seungcheol again?

He haunts you, worse than the ghosts and demons do in the horror movies he’s too afraid to watch (but won’t admit it), and the fact that even when Rowoon is trying to hold a conversation with you and you’re still thinking about Seungcheol is unbelievable. If he doesn’t trust you and your feelings, then why are you even bothering to think about him the slightest?

“I heard you played a big role on this project,” he says, voice thick and sweet as honey. With a hand on the steering wheel, he doesn’t fail to glance over at you every now and then so you can see from his actions that you have the entirety of his attention. “It’s what got you that promotion, right? Congrats on that. They’re a huge client.”

You rub the side of your neck sheepishly. “Haha, yeah. I didn’t really expect it–but I guess all those nights staying in my cubicle with empty boxes of Chinese food instead of partying was worth it. Lost a couple dates, yeah, but at least I’m an independent woman in power!” Although it’s true, you meant it in a cheesy, joking manner.

But it feels more embarrassing than funny with your fist and arm up in the air after that corny comment.

Would it be you if you didn’t make yourself look stupid in front of a hot guy?

“Sorry–not even sure why I did that.” You are definitely mentally smacking yourself up the head. This never happened with Seungcheol before, why are you doing this in front of Rowoon! Is it because you actually see him as a potential candidate? Seungcheol was just a guy that hit on you from time-to-time and rented out your garage. Rowoon works in business development at your office with a charming smile that wins you both jobs and your heart.

Oh. Now you hear yourself.

Maybe that’s why Seungcheol doesn’t believe you.

But none of that matters now. He said it already. Choi Seungcheol doesn’t trust your so-called feelings for him and that’s that.

“It’s cute,” Rowoon chuckles, cheekbones prominent with his wide smile. “You always seemed intimidating at work. I’m glad you’re a lot more loose than that.”

You turn to look at him with a raised brow. “Do I… Do I seem intimidating?”

Rowoon tilts his head a bit, rolling his lips for a moment to gather his thoughts. Hesitant, afraid to offend you, he chooses his words carefully before speaking his mind. “A bit. The whole… isolated office, glass walls, and Dokyeom meeting to talk to you in your office despite his position on the hierarchy, you definitely seem important.”

“And important equates to intimidating?”

He admits to you that your demeanor has always been serious; the last exchange that you had with him (and truthfully, you didn’t even remember this), you accidentally bumped into him after heating up your pasta in the microwave without saying a word. To him, it wasn’t rude (it definitely was), but instead, it was “standing your ground.” You can’t help but laugh at his explanation–you’re a dick to him but he still tries to sweeten it up.

Maybe you should give Rowoon a shot. It’s not like he’s going to be your boyfriend just from a little flirting, right? It’ll be just for fun. Just for the night.

The house is humongous. Well, even the fucking word humongous is an understatement.

Rowoon is equally in awe, stating something along the lines of, “this is a whole mansion,” but this place isn’t just a mansion either–that’s just a portion of the property. The land extends what feels like 3 acres, housing the mansion, a garage big enough to fit at least ten cars, a tennis court, a fountain in the middle of a garden, a guest house (imagine having two homes on one property), and even the living quarters for the staff (just kidding, make that three). The roundabout at the main entrance should’ve given it away (and the valets that grabbed the cars–apparently, they work at the residence full time. Who has valets full time?)

Rumor has it, they have an underground pool, a hot tub, and two home gyms. Two! Normal people don’t even have one.

Truly, you’ll never fully understand how people could even be this wealthy. To add onto that, you can’t even believe you got invited to be here to witness it all. Is this how Yubin lives? You’ve never been to her childhood home before, but just visiting her apartment alone left you in astonishment. Four of your apartment was enough to fit one floor in her penthouse.

“This is… kinda crazy,” you admit, passing your coat to the clerk. “I can’t imagine growing up here.”

“I went to a private school,” Rowoon says, grabbing the number slip from the employee. “There were quite a handful of students that attended and lived in mansions. It’s pretty much what you expect it to be.”

“What? House parties when the parents are away? Got so rowdy that the cops came.”

“It seems like a movie cliche, but it’s more real than you think.”

Maybe public school in a city suburb didn’t prepare you well enough for this.

You feel out of place here. Adjusting the sides of your dress, it makes you a little conscious of the fact that you got yours from a Target collection rather than a store on the Rue Faubourg Saint-Honoré strip that only sells luxury name brands or from a private appointment with a famous designer that requires a letter of recommendation or invitation just to have you written in their calendar for a fitting.

“Just play it chill,” Rowoon says, hand hovering your lower back to guide you inside. He could feel your nervousness, displaying that warming grin of his in hopes it brings some comfort. “I’m sure we don’t have to socialize that much. Just showing face and greeting Mr. Choi should be enough. He’d be happy we made the effort.”

Although you would much prefer ditching and going back home where being underneath a blanket on your couch while streaming a sitcom, advice from someone in the business development department at work would be the option you have to take if it meant developing good relations with the client for potential future clients. Mr. Choi owned one of the biggest software programs globally, which meant if you got on his good side, the possibilities for connections are endless.

You roll your lips. Maybe alcohol will give you a bit more of a confidence boost–you don’t do well in settings like these, especially since you know nobody else other than Rowoon, and even Rowoon himself, you don’t really know that well.

As a server walks by with a tray of glasses filled with champagne at the perfect timing; snatching one up, Rowoon watches as you down it in one shot.

“Um, impressive. And you don’t have to burp?”

You press your hand against your chest. “Burns a little, but I’m holding it in out of respect.” With a soft chuckle, he shakes his head.

Okay, after the fourth glass of champagne, you’re a bit bold.

The third and fourth ones weren’t planned–initially, you figured that two would be good enough to get you a little buzzed, just enough to hold a conversation with Rowoon but also prepare you with the aftershocks of liquid courage that you desperately need for when you speak to Mr. Choi. It’s different approaching him outside of a conference room, especially in a formal event like this, you’re stepping outside of your comfort zone.

But you’re definitely comfortable after that last glass of champagne.

Rowoon suddenly looks a lot more attractive underneath the lights.

You might have an ulterior motive tonight.

The event is set in the backyard, the stairs leading into the house being the main stage and the tables are scattered across the lawn with white tablecloths. There are a couple highboy tables for casual discussions over a drink, one you’ve been leaning on for the past half hour with your elbows pressed as close together as you can.

The thought itself didn’t present until about… well, half an hour ago. Rowoon has been nothing but a gentleman all night; laughing at your stupid jokes, never judging when you accidentally overshare (something you need to work on is shutting the fuck up when you’ve got a little alcohol in your system), and even managing to separate you from your work. People don’t usually do that – especially when they work with you.

There’s really no reason for you to not shoot your shot with Rowoon. He practically checks off all the boxes on your list of characteristics you want your future boyfriend to have: handsome, kind, stable job, a family person, and he’s even into woodworking! He sweetly offers to make a new set of chairs for you since you mentioned how you broke it that one night. That night with Seungcheol.

Fuck. Seungcheol.

You feel like this thing between Seungcheol is like that leg that cracked on the chair. The constant creaking each time you sat on it were like the red flags that you probably shouldn’t be with him, that it was time to part ways with both the chair and Seungcheol, and the nail that you managed to drill in to temporarily fix it wasn’t really a solution. Maybe you need a new chair–a new guy, really. That guy could be Rowoon.

But what’s embarrassing is that even though you’re here, at this extravagant place with a sultry dress, makeup and hair done, a strand twirling around your finger as you giggle at another one of Rowoon’s attempt to joke, you’re still fucking thinking about Choi Seungcheol. He doesn’t even check anything off that list of yours; he’s… well, yeah, he’s handsome, and… okay, he’s kind too–but he doesn’t have a stable– well, he gets frequent customers at your garage, you’ve seen a handful of people come by. The only thing you could hold against him was that he was sort of a family man… but… he also is? Very confusing.

You’ve never been with a guy who got punched over you. Or someone who complicates things by asking to be your fake boyfriend, or someone who acted so well at being your boyfriend that you almost believed it when he said he harbors these feelings for you when he evidently cares for the list of women he’s slept with.

Then again, those are claims that were made by Namjoon and Yubin, who clearly couldn’t be trusted.

It would be easier to start fresh with Rowoon, or any guy, really. There wouldn’t be this same hesitance that you have with Seungcheol – but the more you continue to think about it, no one… makes you go out of your comfort zone like Seungcheol does. Since when did you sleep with a guy the first night you meet him? And how do you continuously let him into your house, despite the fact that you absolutely hate company? Even Yubin isn’t allowed over. And when did you… cry like that, grow that concerned, and feel that rush of emotions that feared for the potential loss of a boy who isn’t even yours?

Either way, your thoughts get interrupted when Mr. Choi takes the “stage,” microphone in hand as he clears his throat to quiet the crowd. He’s got on the typical black tuxedo and white dress shirt underneath (kinda matches the salt and pepper that is his hair) with his wife beside him that really takes the spotlight with her features. She smiles so brightly, a smile that feels familiar, with high cheekbones and long lashes that brushes against them. Her lavender gown is beautiful, but she is the mean beauty. Apparently, the couple had two sons–one that stands beside Mr. Choi, and the other… is late, but he seems to be making his way up the steps to be next to his mother. His silhouette seems familiar, but you pay no mind to it.

That is, until… he turns around.

You think you’re hallucinating–maybe you’ve had too much alcohol for the night and with all the things that went down with Seungcheol, it would be the reason why you think he’s in front of you. He’s been occupying your mind frequently, after all, so it’s a good explanation.

Right?

Right.

But you spoke too soon.

“I want to thank you all for attending our event,” his father begins, glasses glaring from the light. He doesn’t look like Seungcheol – in fact, Mr. Choi looks like his other son, which means Seungcheol took all his mother’s genes. “We’ve been working hard to improve our business, to keep food on our employees’ tables, and expand as a company in order to keep up with the industry. I’d like to thank our executive team…” Mr. Choi starts to name people that you didn’t know, but you clap along with the crowd, “... and our third party team that assisted us with the changes…” and when he mentions the name of your company, he gestures to you and Rowoon in the crowd before stating your name clearly.

And your eyes meet with Seungcheol.

You don’t know what you expect from him – will he be mad, upset, happy? The furrow of his brows only exhibit confusion, but beyond that, you don’t know how he feels.

When Mr. Choi finishes off his speech, you do your best to avoid Seungcheol. Attention all on Rowoon, you listen to him babble on about his recent woodworking project, but at this point, you’re tuning him out and just nodding. How unlucky are you that you of course would see Seungcheol here! At a fucking work event. With a guy you’re trying to hit on. A hot guy, a matter-of-fact, and the amount of times you have to remind yourself that Seungcheol made it clear that he needed space from you is only reassuring that pressing your chest together for Rowoon to get a better view of the girls is what you need to do to move forward.

“... and I found crotch lumber!” he exclaims, and you have no clue what the fuck he’s talking about but with how he flexes his arm in that tight shirt in excitement, you want to do his–

“Hey,” that voice greets, his hot breath against your shoulder. “Can we talk?”

“Sorry, do I know you?”

Seungcheol licks his teeth in annoyance.

Admittingly, you were so shocked to see him earlier that you barely noticed him in his suit. Why… Why are the sleeves of his blazer so snug? Hair slicked back and even having shaved his five o’clock stache, he’s got his hands in the front pockets of his trousers, sucking in his cheeks in irritation. “Baby, don’t play. What are you doing here?”

Baby. How does he manage to make your heart clench with one word?

“I got invited here,” you turn your body to face him completely. You can only imagine what Rowoon thinks of the two of you, especially with the pet name that Seungcheol throws so casually. “Apparently, I’ve worked for your dad and didn’t even realize it.”

Seungcheol clenches his jaw before gesturing at Rowoon with it. “And who’s he?”

“My date slash co-worker.”

Oh, he didn’t like that answer. “Come. Let’s talk.” Seungcheol places his hand on your arm, but seconds after, Rowoon has a grip on Seungcheol’s wrist. Their eyes lock, and you could feel the burning lasers that Seungcheol shoots–it feels like deja vu.

“Who are you?”

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#seungcheol smut #seungcheol #scoups #scoups fanfic #seungcheol fanfic #svt fanfic #svt x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fanfic #svt smut

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r--kt · 18 days

Text

Rin's confession scene and its rough timing

"the friend who liked her just died and THAT'S when she decided to confess to another guy?" that's what I heard about this scene. is it really this selfish? what's the point of her confessing right then? well, let's see

contents | the scene itself · lost in translation · prerequisites

CH. 244. First version.

to begin with, I looked at the original scan, and it turns out that both English translations distort the essence. I also don't know Japanese and I will talk about it really shallowly.

why did I mention both translations? here's another one.

I'll give this one as a better example and later will summarise the translation thing in general.

The scene itself

Obito is dead. Kakashi and Rin have just said goodbye to him forever (yeah, the irony) and are in the middle of a battle with Iwagakure ninjas, who are much stronger. that's Kakashi and Rin's conflict I'm going to talk about.

so, Kakashi is not even considering the option that Rin will fight now, he is so set up for the idea of protecting her that this is the only attitude for him now, and it is not surprising for a child who has just lost a friend in battle. the same description can be applied to Rin. she also just lost a friend and is as afraid that she might lose another one. when Kakashi tells her to leave, she objects because she wants to protect him the same way he's protecting her now, and the same way Obito protected both of them (what a bunch of self-sacrificers). this is actually the central theme of their conflict.

so the first component of their conflict is Rin's care for Kakashi, from which the second component comes out — Rin's confession of her feelings for Kakashi. why so?

Lost in translation

now let's linger on the original, and see what was really meant there.

CH. 244 Page 13

Rough translation (tell me if I messed it up)

Kakashi: Obito liked you... he liked you so much... you were important to him. that's why I'll risk my life to save it.

Rin: if that's the case! Kakashi... my feelings—

okay, how exactly is their dialogue built? Kakashi says about Obito's feelings for Rin and emphasizes that he is ready to risk his life to protect what was very important to Obito (saving Rin) in tribute to the dead comrade.

in response, Rin uses the word "nara" [ なら ] [second picture, frame on the left], which means "then, in that case, if". thus she makes a link with Kakashi's remark, which means that Rin intends to continue the meaning of what the boy said with his phrase.

the thing is, Kakashi's phrase contains two thoughts:

Obito, who just died in the fight, did it because he loved you very much and wanted for you to be safe.

I respect that and I want to fulfill his wish by protecting you. that's why you should go away.

Kakashi focuses on the second thought, while Rin focuses on the first one. this is where they have a conflict, they understood the meaning of what was said in different ways. or they choose what they wanted to hear.

Rin focuses on the first thought because with the second one Kakashi decided everything for her — after what happened. she needs to find an argument for why exactly she can stay and protect Kakashi, and this argument has already been said by Kakashi in relation to Obito, so why wouldn't he understand her in this?

what she intended to say can be read as follows: "since you understand Obito's position, you should understand why I don't want to leave you. the way I was dear to Obito, you are dear to me. and that's why I'm not leaving the battlefield."

her confession here is so hasty, forced, she needs to say it to explain her intentions. there's no selfishness actually and I think she didn't even wanted to tell this to him in such way, because she does it really cautiously, just enough to explain and not shout "I LOVE YOU", as Hinata did, for example. so, she just had to.

why is this "my feelings" phrase a declaration of love to him, and not something else? after all, feelings can be about a lot in such a context, and we are not given a direct lead, are we?

Kakashi: I... I was once... the scum that would abandon you...

after Rin's words, Kakashi doesn't talk about anything but himself. he says that he has already let Rin down once, as if showing her that he is not worthy of Rin feeling for him anything comparable to what he mentioned before. we can also see that he is hesitating a bit, trying to find what to say, as if Rin's words were unexpected (but not traumatizing) for him anyways. however, he obviously interrupts her, that is, he does not want to hear the full phrase, again for the reason above.

Prerequisites

a couple of additional "why then" reasons.

Rin was being kidnapped, and she probably blamed herself for it. due to her abduction, kkobkk opened a side quest to rescue her, which led to the site of their last battle together (cave) and the enemy's trap (collapse). and the conflict scene with Kakashi takes place right after. can you imagine how it feels to feel guilty about everything that happened and find yourself in a situation where the best thing you can do is not get in the way? Rin's tears here, as well as her desire to help Kakashi after everything, are really justified, and I feel very sorry for the poor girl.

CH. 239

and even while being kidnapped, Rin protected Kakashi and Obito in her own way. before the mission, she gave Kakashi a first aid kit, which helped a lot when he was injured.

well, what am I all about. this is not a random moment for confession, and you should not blame Rin for allegedly not respecting Obito's feelings. she? didn't respect Obito's feelings? can you hear yourself? she's the last person you can say that about. I love her. be nice to the cutie.

#rin nohara #rin #kakashi hatake #obito uchiha #team Minato #naruto #naruto shippuden

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chiefduckgarden · 11 months

Text

Definitely, Jim and Pam

Summary: Part two of this thing is feeling like Jim and Pam

A/N: It took a long time to finish, but it's finally here. Thanks to all the peole who kept asking about this part two. And sorry for the waiting. This is about 10k+ words so, enjoy!

Remember this is inspired in Jim and Pam from The Office!

--------------------------------------------------

Los Angeles was nice.

It's been a month since you started college and you could say you had blended in pretty well.

The classes were exhausting but everything else was new and exciting for you. You felt like it was your chance for a new beginning, and you definitely needed one.

After that terrible prom night you isolated yourself for two entire weeks. No social media, no calls, no messages, no visits. You only bothered to send your application letter for college.

When you finally decided to turn on your phone again you realized some of your friends tried to reach out to you. You answered every single message, letting everyone know that you were okay. But your heart broke a little when you realized that none of those messages or missed calls were from Wanda.

And that was your breaking point. You understood that you really screwed up things with her. She wasn't even concerned about your absence, if anything you thought she was relieved that you didn't tried to talk her anymore.

For the next months you avoided anything related to Wanda. Before blocking her number you sent her one last text apologizing and explaining your reasons to go zero contact with her.

You didn't expect her to answer anyway.

Although Pietro did call you to know about how you were doing, the moment he mentioned Wanda you stopped him right away.

"Please let's not talk about her, it still hurts too much". That's what you said.

He sighed but changed the subject immediately. That's when you found out he got into a foreign university in Switzerland and that he was moving out of the country.

You smiled happily and extended your congratulations to him.

Some time later you found yourself moving to Los Angeles and starting your first year of college.

Some of your friends ended up with you there, like Kate, Peter and MJ. It was awesome to have old friends with you, but meeting new people was also exciting.

You heard from a random conversation between MJ and Peter that Wanda and Vision ended up together in NYU.

Your felt your stomach flinch at the reminder of Vision stealing your college dream with Wanda. And you hated yourself for it. By that moment you should've been over Wanda, she didn't love you, there was no reason to grieve a love that never existed in the first place.

But you excused yourself to your friends and ran into the nearest bathroom to cry your heart out. You knew you shouldn't, but you couldn't help it.

After washing your face to prevent anyone to notice your were crying, you looked at yourself in the mirror. You couldn't keep going like that. You felt like you were a ghost: lifeless.

Wanda really hit different but you needed to change, to take control of your life again.

You knew what you needed to do.

You needed to move on from Wanda.

I know Pietro, she's great but, she's my best friend - Wanda said to her brother, tears dried all over her cheeks - I just never thought she would feel the same way. I didn't know what to say, I just wanted to run. Now I think it's all messed up, it's too late. There's nothing left to do. She probably hates me. But... I think I'm still in love with her.

Wanda had really screw things up with you.

She knew it.

She couldn't help it though, the moment you told her about your feelings she froze. She never expected that those words would ever came out from your mouth.

You loved her.

You really loved her.

How did she never notice it before?

And why did you never say anything?

She had so many questions running trough her mind.

It was prom night, she was about to leave with Vision, she wanted to stay a little longer but they were already late, you were there with Kate, she didn't even know you liked Kate, did you really like her? Why did you never mentioned it to her before? Why was she so mad when she found out?. You loved her. You loved her.

You loved her.

Maybe it was a joke.

She looked at you expecting for you to laugh and tell her it was all a joke.

But you didn't.

- Y/N... Why are you doing this? You know I... I can't, he's there and...

Vision and his parents were waiting for her. She just started walking as you kept apologizing. She felt numb through the rest of the night.

Her boyfriend and his family did the most of the talking during the dinner.

She couldn't focus on anything that wasn't you. She had just left you. Alone. You had poured you heart out for her and she left.

You probably were devastated.

But what was she supposed to do?

She really was clueless. Everything happened so fast. And for some reason she felt like she needed to stand up for Vision. But she probably got too defensive.

Oh god it was really a mess.

He was always right.

They used to have recurrent fights or disscusions because Vision felt like you liked Wanda more than just as a friend. But she always defend you from the accusations saying you were her best friend, nothing more. Maybe she tried so hard because she wanted to convince herself too.

That night she came home exhausted. She felt her body drained from any energy or motivation.

Her brother was still awake and when he heard she was back he walked to her room to ask about how her night went.

She tried to put on a brave face but the moment Pietro flashed her a warm smile she broke down in his arms crying.

She vent to her brother all night long, letting him know everything that had happened at prom with you.

He didn't seem too surprised when she mentioned your love for her. Instead he only hugged her harder.

Pietro had been there for his sister since forever, their twin bond was something sacred for them, they were each other's best friends and obviously, each other's best confident.

He could still remember when a little 10 year old Wanda confessed to him that she wanted to kiss you. Some kids at her school had have their first kiss at recess that day and Wanda wanted to have her first kiss. With you.

That conversation followed so many others about her little, pure and innocent attraction towards you.

As she grew older those confessions ceased but Pietro remained as the front row witness of your undeniable love for each other.

- What am I supposed to do Pietro? I'm just really confused.

The white-haired boy smiled kindly at her.

- What do you feel like doing? Wanda we both know very well that you used to have feelings for Y/N, let's not fool ourselves.

Her brother was right, Wanda was well aware of her old feelings for you. Although she had worked so hard to buried them in the deepest place of her heart and mind, she could still remember how it was.

Who could blame her? She thought that forget those feelings was the best decision in order to protect your friendship. She never expected that some day you would feel the same way.

But there she was. Crying in her prom dress, secured in the safety of her brother's embrace, regretting every single second of that night.

- I truly don't know what to do Pietro... I feel like such an idiot and a bad friend.

- No Wanda, you're a human, there isn't a correct way to react to this kind of situation, you act out of impulse and natural reaction, there's nothing wrong with that.

- But I feel so bad... Y/N didn't deserve that... What do I do Pietro? Tell me...

- No sestra - her brother told her with a soft voice - I know, guilt it's a tricky feeling, but you need to figure out how to solve this problem, you can take your time and think about it but in the end it's gonna be up to you... Not me, Vision or Y/N... It's your decision Wanda.

Pietro gently kissed her sister's forehead and walked back to his room.

Wanda barely slept that night, too busy thinking in every possibility.

The next morning she received a text from Vision asking how she was doing and letting her know that he was gonna post a picture of the both of them from last night. She quickly understood the not so discrete hint and also posted a picture. She didn't feel like writing any caption so she just limited herself to type a red heart emoji.

The days passed and she used any possible excuse to avoid seeing Vision. She felt so bad for him too, he was oblivious of the situation, it wasn't fair for him either that his girlfriend was having doubts about her love for him and their relationship. It wasn't fair for him that all Wanda could think about was you.

A week later she got a text message from you. The first text you had send her since prom.

She doubt about opening it or not. What if it was a letter telling her how much you hated her now, asking her to never come close to you again, that your friendship was over and from that moment on Wanda had no place in your life.

After twenty minutes of debating with herself she opened the text.

It wasn't what she expected.

The text was long, as she expected, but there wasn't any hate on it. It made her cry, the way you expressed yourself and the way you perfectly described your feelings. She felt terrible when you apologized for making her feel uncomfortable. You could never.

She would never let anyone know the content of the letter, it was something she decided to keep for herself. A secret between you and her for only your hearts to know, hence she never mentioned your text to anyone. Not even Pietro. The letter becoming the first secret between the Maximoff twins.

Wanda's life froze for days, she didn't isolate herself like you, she just felt dead-walking everywhere she went. She was physically there but her mind was somewhere else. She was thinking about you.

But your text was clear. You needed time and space away from her. It hurt like hell but she respected you decision. Even when she wasn't sure if she wanted for you to forget her.

She got accepted into NYU, just like Vision. Her family threw a party for her and for the very first time in years you weren't present in one of her celebrations. Not that Irina Maximoff didn't call you, but mostly because you politely declined her invitation making up some lame excuse, thanking her though.

Some time later she was packing her entire life in a set of gray suitcases, ready to take a flight to New York and start her new life at college with her boyfriend by her side. It sounded like a dream if you hear it that way.

But for Wanda everything was like a nightmare. NYU was her college dream just because she always thought you would be with her. She wasn't even sure of the path she was following, she didn't know if she really wanted to study there anymore.

Her relationship with Vision was fragile. Since prom night Wanda drastically changed her affection towards him. She didn't kiss him anymore, they only had been in a few two or three dates after and the PDA was completely gone.

Vision wasn't a stupid guy. He noticed this changes since the very first day, but decided to keep silence. For some reason he thought that Wanda would come around again once they were in college together.

But during the first weeks in NYU everything went downhill. They both had classes all day and different schedules, so they didn't had too much time left to spent together besides the weekends. But even those days Wanda always had an excuse to avoid any plan: homework, an exam to study for, books she had to read, etc.

Vision grew tired of it by the end of the fifth week, after Wanda had canceled him for the third time in a row. Not caring about the fact that the girl told him she needed to finish a report for one of her classes he walked straight to her dorm and knocked on her door.

- What are you doing here? Vision I told you...

- I know, I know what you said, but I'm tired of it - he interrupted her - Weeks Wanda, it's been weeks since the last time we had a date, weeks since the last time we spent time together, I don't know what's happening but I demand an explanation now...

Wanda stared at him.

- I don't know what are you talking about Vis, I have so many things to do and...

- No! - he interrupted again - This isn't something that started just now. I felt it since a long time ago - he paused for a few seconds, stepping in completely in the room closing the door for privacy - Something happened at prom night, something changed that night... I don't know what it is but... Just tell me what is happening to us...

Wanda, who was now sat at the edge of her bed looked at him with teary eyes. She knew this had to happen at some point.

- I'm just tired Vision, I'm exhausted... - she said with trembling voice and some tears already falling on her cheeks - I'm going through so many changes in my life right now, I had this huge fight with my best friend and now we're not even talking anymore... Now I'm here in New York and I'm not even happy about it, I don't like the way my life is going right now... I'm not sure if NYU is what I really want and I'm questioning every decision I've made since the moment I decided to leave my prom party to go with you and your parents for dinner...

Vision didn't know what to respond to that. When he walked to her dorm that night he wasn't expecting this outcome.

- You wanted to stay? - he asked cautiously.

Wanda nodded.

- Why didn't you say anything then? We could've done something...

- I just thought that if told you I would've dissapoint you and your family. You are my boyfriend Vision, sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the relationship... And at some point I felt like I needed to make you happy...

- But were you happy? In our relationship?

- In the beginning, yes, I was delighted with the idea of us, of you... You made me really happy Vision... But then we started having all this problems and I always felt like a was giving too much without getting anything back.

- And why did you never say anything? - he said exasperated.

Vision wasn't one of those boys who are bad boyfriends and are aware of it. He truly didn't saw any of this coming.

He listened to Wanda attentive, letting her express every single thing she had to say. And as the girl talked he realized how trash of a boyfriend he was. He was respectful and never treated her bad, but he took Wanda for granted, not being the same boyfriend she fell for at the beginning. He understood the girl's disappointment on him, and as much as he wanted there was no way to turn back time.

After forthy minutes of talking, he stood for up from his seat in her bed, hugged her one last time and started walking out of the room.

- I'm sorry I wasn't a better boyfriend, you deserve so much better, I'm sorry this didn't work out - those were his last words for her before closing the door.

Wanda remained in her place for some seconds before start crying. She called her brother, although she knew it was probably and odd time in Switzerland she didn't know what else to do or who else to call for comfort. Vision was her boyfriend after all, they had been together for almost three years and it was impossible for her not to feel a hole in her heart. That night she cried her heart out, and did not attend her classes the next day, too energy drained to take a step out of her room.

Eventually she got better. After three weeks she bounce back from the break up. Although she still had a lot of issues to deal with, she felt relieved. For some reason it felt like someone had taken away some of the weight on her shoulders. She felt lighter.

Los Angeles

You were doing a lot better. Two months after your last break down you were happier than in the earliest months of college.

You decided to focus your attention on anything else but Wanda. You started to study a lot harder, focusing more on your notes and classes, and also got yourself into a hobbie: tennis.

Kate was in the tennis team since the beginning of the year, and when you told her you were looking for extra curricular classes she suggested her club.

You used to occasionally visit her during her trainings, you already knew the coaches and the rest of the team, so you figured it wouldn't be so hard to fit in.

The coaches were happy to welcome you and a few days later after filling your proper application you were officially in. The only condition was to do some extra training for some weeks until you could keep up with the pace of some of the other new girls. You promised to train after hours until you were as good as them.

That's how you met Sharon Carter.

The first day you stayed after hours to train you noticed immediately a blond, beautiful girl who arrived at the practice court about ten minutes after the other girls left.

You didn't recognized her, she wasn't part of the team, or anyone you've seen before.

She was also surprised to see anyone staying later in the tennis court after the usual practice.

- Oh hey, hi - you said approaching to her with a kind smile.

- Hello, uhmm I'm Sharon, Sharon Carter...

- I'm Y/N, Y/N Y/LN, a pleasure... Are you new here?

She laughed a little, denying with her head.

- No, I don't study here, I'm coach Peggy's niece, she allows me to use the court sometimes after her team's practice.

- Ohh, well it's a pleasure... I'm new in the team and I need to practice more hours to keep up with the rest... So I guess you'll see me around here more often

She smiled kindly.

- That's great, it will be good to have some company.

You smiled kindly and nodded.

A month after your first encounter Sharon became one of closest friends. You two had so much in common, you liked the same kind of music and most of your favorite sitcoms were also her favorites, so naturally you spent a lot of time together, getting to know each other deeper.

She told you about her sabbatical year and how she was still thinking about what college she would go to.

Eventually you became a better tennis player, but even when the coaches told you there was no need for you keep staying after hours, you kept doing it to spend time with her. And she would visit your dorm on a daily bases after classes

When Peter, MJ and Kate got to know her they didn't hesitate to start to tease you, referring to Sharon from that moment on, as your girlfriend. You just smiled shyly denying whth your head. Of course, Sharon was beautiful, but you couldn't say you were something more than just good friends.

You wouldn't even thought of that possibility until some weeks later when she suddenly asked you out. It wasn't that explicit, but the invitation was kind of obvious.

- Do you want to do something tomorrow? Like go to see a movie or have dinner? - she asked you nervously one afternoon while you were doing homework at your dorm.

- Sure - you answered without thinking too much - Where do you wanna go?

She paused for a second and you looked at her intrigued.

- Sharon?

She looked back at you smiling shyly.

- Well, I was thinking on going to have dinner at a nice restaurant, you know I have a reservation and everything...

- Oh - you said surprised but smiling too - Like a date?

She nodded nervously.

- Yes... Like a date... Would you like to go in a date with me?

Long story short, that date was the first out of so many others that followed it right after. You had a great time with her, and the affection felt almost natural between you.

Sharon never mentioned and label for the two of you, she would only say you were dating. She probably didn't want to push you, and you were thankful for it.

But she did used to hold your hand, kiss you, take you out, wait for you after classes and open all the doors for you. And you of course, reciprocated every kind action to her. You two were basically a couple without the label.

The first vacation came sooner than you thought and you found yourself saying goodbye to Sharon with your luggage ready on your cab to take you to the airport.

- You know, you can visit me anytime - you said kissing her on the lips - If you need anything just call me okay?

She nodded and promised to visit you during your break, she would stay in Los Angeles for a while.

You knew it was a weird situation for you. Sharon was beautiful, kind, funny and you could definitely say you had feelings for her.

But deep down you knew Wanda was going to be back in town too, and you were well aware of the possibilities of you two finding each other at some places. It was impossible not to considering it was a three month break from college.

You felt you were doing a good job keeping her away from your mind. But you didn't know how it would affect your progress seeing her again. You weren't sure if she would speak to you, or if she would just pretend you didn't exist.

----------------

Being back at home was good. You had missed your parents more than you would admit, and you definitely missed your mom's meals, finally getting to eat homemade food for the first time in months.

Your first week back was calm. You stayed at home most of the time hanging wi your parents and called Shaeron every night before going to bed.

It was the very first day of your second week when everything took a turn. You were talking with your mom about college and your classes when she mentioned Wanda.

- She left college after her first three months, she's been home since then and looking for a new option.

You were surprised to hear the news. NYU was Wanda's dream since forever, and you couldn't understand why she would drop it.

- She didn't tell you? - your mom asked at your astonishment.

She never heard the story of why you and Wanda stopped talking. In fact, she didn't even know you two weren't friends anymore.

- No, we've been distant since prom, we had a fight and we just... We're not friends.

- Oh I'm sorry honey, but maybe you can talk it out with her and fix things up, you two have been best friends for so long... Don't let this ruin all those years of friendship...

You smiled sadly nodding your head, not wanting to keep discussing about it.

On wednesday you, Kate, MJ and Peter went to the theater to watch the new terror movie. They mentioned some of your old high school friends were tagging along but you never expected to see Wanda. Ever since she dated Vision she stopped going out with your group of friends.

But she was there. It felt like slow motion for you. You were already inside the the theater when she stepped in. She looked at you shyly while greeting all of your other friends, never breaking eye contact with you.

When she was in front of you she hugged you tightly.

- Hi Y/N

You reciprocated the affection dumbly.

- Hi Wanda

- How are you doing? - she asked.

- I'm good - you answered shortly, awkwardly smiling - How are you doing?... My mom told me about NYU... I'm sorry it didn't work out.

She sighed.

- Yeah well, I'm better now, I realized it wasn't what I needed or wanted and I just dropped it...

You nodded.

- I hope you find something soon, you're brilliant, any school will be lucky to have you.

She smiled.

-Thank you Y/N...

Peter said the movie was about to start and you two followed him inside.

Wanda sat two spots from you, Kate and MJ in the middle and Peter on your other side. Some of your other friends sat next to Peter.

The rest of the group probably didn't notice it, but there was a certain tension between you and Wanda through the whole movie.

She was nervous.

From the moment Kate told her you were gonna be there she imagined a thousand of different scenarios of how it would be like.

Just like you, she wasn't sure if you would speak to her. After your last message to her she didn't have any contact with you. Not even when she wanted to tell you about her situation with college.

She knew she hurt in the past, but she missed your friendship more than anything. Even though she had deeper feelings for you, she would be happy if you wanted to be her friend again.

You, on the other hand, were really confused about how you felt. You thought that you would feel anger the moment you saw her, but you just felt awkward around her. Even after she broke your heart in a thousand pieces you didn't feel mad. Maybe those months of healing really made progress in you.

When the movie finished everybody said goodbye and walked to their respective car. When you were about to leave you saw Wanda texting on her phone and walking to sit on a bench.

You wanted to just ignored her and go back home but you just couldn't. So, against any common sense you walked straight to her.

- Hey, are you going home now?

She looked at you a bit confused.

- Yeah, well I'm texting Pietro to see if he's on his way, he told me he would pick me up...

You nodded.

- Oh sure, I forgot Pietro was home too... How is he doing? - you asked.

- He's fine, he told me he's doing great at college and at the athlete team... Ohh and that he met a girl, I think her name is Monica... They've been dating for a while now..

You smiled.

- Wow, I would never imagined Pietro finally settling down... That's fantastic.

- I know, he's really happy.

There was a moment of silence interrupted by a ding on her phone.

- Dang it... - she said after reading the text.

- What's wrong?

- Pietro forgot to pick me up... He's leaving the house just now....

You looked at her texting. You knew you would probably regret your next comment but you couldn't just leave her there at a parking lot.

- Tell him not to worry, I'll take you home - you said.

She looked at you surprised.

- Really?

You smiled kindly.

- Yeah, just like the old times, let me drive you home Wanda.

She accepted and the two of you walked to your car.

You turned the music on and drove to her house. But even with the noise from the radio, it felt like there was a dead silence in the car.

After the first three minutes she finally got the courage to speak.

- So, are you doing well? How is it like living in Los Angeles?

- It's been great so far, college has been fun and I really like the city, it's amazing.

- That's great to hear Y/N, I'm really happy for you.

- Thanks.

Another moment of silence. You decided to be the one to speak this time.

- I know I said this before but I'm sorry about NYU, it must have been really difficult to take a decision like that...

Wanda sighed nodding.

- Yes, it was, but at the same time it was easy for me to understand that it wasn't something I liked, it just never felt right... The hardest part was telling my parents... That was scary.

- Yeah, I can imagine... But your parents love you, I bet they understood...

- Yes they did, although they asked me like a million times if I was sure... They even made me doubt sometimes...

You both laughed.

- Oh missed this - she said smiling.

Your laugh died and you swallowed nervously.

- What? - you asked.

She looked at you.

- Us. I miss you Y/N, so much... I miss our friendship.

You weren't expecting that answer. You didn't know what to say, although it was obvious you had miss those moments too. And it only made you feel guilty.

- Wanda... I'm sorry I ruined everything for us... I shouldn't have tell you anything that night...

You didn't look back at her, but she did look at you.

- Y/N, you didn't ruin anything... That night it was me the one that screwed up.

- No - you answered - You had a boyfriend and I was your best friend, I wasn't supposed to feel anything other than a friendship... And even if I did I should never tell you just because you were happy with Vision... I should've respected that.

Another silence.

- Can we please drive somewhere else to talk? - she asked.

-To talk? - you asked unsure of what it meant.

- Yes, I feel we need to sort this out, I really miss you Y/N... I wanna try to restore our old friendship... If you want it too, of course.

You thought about it before answering. After some seconds you changed the car direction.

- Yeah, let's talk.

You drove to a nearly park. It was getting kind of late and the place it was almost empty, just a few people walking by. Wanda found a bench for the two of you.

- I don't know what to say - you admitted nervously.

She looked at you.

- Well, first of all, I want you to know that you didn't ruin anything... I understand the reasons why you choose to cut contact with me, if anything I was the one to ruin our friendship, the way I reacted wasn't the best... I'm sorry for making you feel bad.

- Wanda...

- Let me finish - she interrupted you - I know you feel bad because you said you love me, but I want you to understand that I could have had a better reaction... Leave you alone in the hallway was the worst thing I've done.

- It's fine Wanda, you were respecting your relationship and Vision...

- I just wanted to say sorry Y/N, i wish I would had a better reaction.

You nodded.

- I appreciate your apology, but don't worry about it anymore ... I already forgive everything.

- You did? - she asked curious.

- Yes, I realized you were shocked with my confession... There was no way you would've react differently...

- Maybe it was... But there's no way to turn back time right? At least I finally got it out of my system, I wanted to apologize a long time ago.

You smiled kindly. The two of you stared at the sky in silence.

- Your text, the letter you sent me... I think I understood better after reading it... - Wanda said - Thanks for saying all of the nice stuff about me, you really are a goof friend...

- All I said was true Wanda, we've been best friends for so long I couldn't get myself to hate you.. I mean I probably felt like hating you back then, but that was probably more sadness than hate... But all the things I wrote were completely true.

She smiled and hugged you. The affection surprised you, but you just smiled and reciprocated the hug.

- So it's all good between us? - you asked - I want my best friend back.

- Yes! - she answered excited - Yes, everything is fine.

You smiled at her.

- I'm glad.

She was bouncing her feet happily.

- Now tell everything about UCLA, how you've been doing there?

You told her everything about college, your classes, your friends, about your tennis games and everything than ran through your mind in that moment.

You mentioned Sharon briefly, not paying too much attention to the details of your relationship with her.

And the she dropped the bomb: she told you she broke up with Vision.

She explained to you her reasons to end up the relationship and you did nothing but listen.

And when she cried, telling you about her breakdown in college and the moment she decided to leave, you hold her. For a moment it truly felt like you went back in time.

You drove Wanda to her home, and she told you she would call you to make plans for the rest of the summer.

Pietro said hi from his window and you smiled at the sight of your friend.

On the way back home you smiled to yourself. You had a warm feeling on your chest and felt butterflies in your stomach.

Everything was perfect for some days. You and Wanda spent more time together, you even helped her send her application letter to different universities, including UCLA. She wasn't sure at first, but you talked wonders about the college and about how amazing it would be to have her at campus until she finally accepted. It was only a matter of time to hear back from the universities.

But the following week you noticed Peter and Kate get suspicious and secretive around you. At the beginning you thought it was a little bit odd, but then they started to laugh everytime you walked into a room.

It got to a point where the situation became unbearable.

- Okay what is happening? - you finally asked them one day before getting into the movies.

Kate looked at you nervously.

- What....What do you mean? Nothing is happening...

You looked at Peter.

- You will tell me what is happening Peter Parker... Everytime I walk into a room you two laugh and you've been too secretive lately.

They looked at each other.

- Let's tell her Peter, she will have too know anyways - Kate said.

- Tell me what? - you asked confused - I'm not mad or anything I just want to know...

Peter sighed.

- We planned a surprise with Sharon... She's coming to visit in three days.

It ttok you a second to react, and when your brain finally understood what they just said you couldn't help but smile.

- Really? She's coming?

- Yes - Kate answered happily.

- Why didn't you tell me before? I could have help her... Does she have a flight yet? Or do you want me to...

Peter interrupted you, giggling at your excitement.

- Hey Y/N, don't worry, everything is fine and ready, she'll be here in three days, her flight lands on Saturday at noon...

You smiled again and thank them both for their help.

Wanda arrived later that afternoon. Neither of you mentioned Sharon through the whole movie, it was just when you were driving Wanda home when she noticed you were happier than other days. Peter and Kate were in the car with you too cause you asked them to go to house to arrange everything for Saturday.

- You look pretty happy today Y/N - she told you.

- Well, I feel really happy Wanda - you answered with a smile.

- Can I know why? - she asked happily too.

That's the moment it dawned to you. You never told Wanda about your relationship with Sharon. And as you were thinking of this realization, Peter was faster than you to answer to her.

- She's happy because her girlfriend is coming to visit her on Saturday - he explained.

- What?! Your girlfriend?! - she asked confused.

Wanda was shocked to say the least. You never mentioned a girlfriend on the days before, and the news hit her like a bucket of ice water. She didn't know how to feel about it.

You two were recently fixing your friendship. She didn't know if you were still having feelings for her cause she never asked you in order to not jeopardize what you had. But a girlfriend was a factor she didn't consider.

- Yes! Her name is Sharon, we've been planning this surprise for days - Kate explained.

That's when you interfiered.

- She's not my girlfriend - you said nervously looking through the mirror to see your friends - Sharon is my friend, I think I mentioned her before...

Wanda tried to remember and she slightly nodded. She remembered that name.

- So... she's not your girlfriend? - Wanda asked.

You looked at her unsure of what to say.

- Well... It's complicated, we've been dating for a few months now, but we haven't... You know... Make it official

She nodded again as she swallowed dry.

- Maybe it's time Y/N - Kate interrupted - You could ask her now that she's coming... We can help you!

Peter second Kate on the idea and they started rambling about it.

But you noticed a change in Wanda's behavior. She wasn't laughing anymore. Suddenly she got quiet.

You bumped her shoulder to caught her attention.

- Hey, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about my relationship with Sharon, and it's not because I didn't want to... I just forget about it to be honest, and as I said, Sharon and I... We're not officially together yet, we're just... - before you could finish your sentence she interrupted.

- Hey Y/N, it's fine, don't freak out about it... It's just it took me by surprise, but I'm happy to see you happy...

She gave you a reassuring little smile.

- Thanks for understand Wanda... It's been difficult for me to open myself to this feelings... I think it's the first time I I say I'm dating Sharon out loud.

_ I get it, it can be complicated, but don't worry Y/N, if you and Sharon are comfortable with what you have, you don't need to rush it.

You smiled and her.

_ Thank you - you said.

It looked like the conversation about Sharon died right there, but the moment Wanda stepped in her house, she walked straight to her brother's room.

- I just don't know how to feel Pietro... I'm really confuse. I know it might sound selfish to say but I can't believe she didn't tell me before about this girl.... Everything would have been different

- What would've been different? - he asked

- Well, you know, the approach with her... You know I like her Pietro, since we were little, and now that i broke up with Vision... I thought she was single... You know what I mean.

Pietro analyzed her sister's expression.

- You were expecting to date her?

She sighed.

- Well, not straighly date her but... I was expecting some sort of awakening for us... The start of something more.

Pietro looked at her worried.

- Wanda, don't joke around this... You know she loved you, but now with this new information maybe it would be better if you move cautiously... I wouldn't want for you to get hurt.

Wanda buried her head in her hands desesperatly.

- I truly believed this would be our chance... We could be something more...

- You can daydream all you want Wanda, but the truth is, she has a girlfriend now and you have to accept it. And let me be honest with you, I don't think it was correct from you to go close to her with those ulterior motives, if you wanted to date her you should have told her before offer a friendship.

- No, I truly want to fix up our friendship, it is the most important thing for me to save. I just thought it would be nice if something else happened...

Pietro sighed.

- Well, I wish you good luck sestra, when this Sharon girl arrives you're gonna need to find the strength to see her fooling around with Y/N, and I can tell you, it's not gonna be nice...

Wanda barely slept that night. She imaged how would it be with Sharon around. And she thought that it was probably what you felt when she started dating Vision, you had to see her with another person, basically being replaced.

Ohh, only if she knew back then about your feelings. For sure everything would be different.

And she wasn't wrong.

From the moment you picked up Sharon at the airport you two became inseparable, although she was stying at Kate's house cause she basically lived in the Bishop's mansion, so there was more than enough room for her.

Wanda told you to enjoy the first days with her alone. She said you could show her the town and explore the place together, she would tag along later.

You thought it was a good idea. But you also noticed a changed in Wanda's behavior since Peter and Kate mentioned Sharon was your girlfriend. You didn't want to speculate around her feelings, but you couldn't help but ask if she was feeling left out, or replaced. You two were recently getting close again and you didn't want anything to jinx the progress.

But no, Wanda said she wanted to be your friend again. Nothing more.

Sharon was being a delight, as always. Being with her was easy, you never had to think too much about it. And that was probably what you liked more. But now, with her in town you felt tlike something was missing. Sharon made you happy, and she was a good company, but something felt odd at the thought of being more than just... that.

However, you took her to all the fun and interesting places around, telling her a little about the local stories. Peter and Kate sometimes would go with you, but they left you alone as much as possible, totally rooting for you two.

It was on her fifth day there when you planned to visit the amusement park with Sharon, Kate, Peter, Wanda and some other friends.

Wanda was a nervous wreck to say the least. She was wondering how this new dynamic would be. She knew you would spend more time with your girlfriend, she knew you would kiss her and hols her hand and make her laugh. So she prepared herself to control any sort of jealousy reaction she could have.

But the reality hit her as soon as you parked in front of her house to pick her up. She naturally walked to the copilot seat, only to find a blonde girl already sitting there.

- Hey Wanda, this is Sharon Carter, my friend from college. Sharon this Wanda, my best friend - you made the introductions, and the two girls smiled, saying how pleasure was to meet each other.

- I guess you're having a backseat today Maximoff - Kate said, opening the door for her.

- Yeah, I guess today I will be third-wheeling you and Peter back there - Wanda replied, laughing at the guy's reaction.

You laughed at the joke too. Luckily for her you didn't noticed that the passive aggressive answer to Kate was because she felt uncomfortable with the situation.

The rest of the days didn't turn easier for her. You would spent most of your time with Sharon, making silly jokes and fooling around.

Wanda undoubtedly felt jealous. She couldn't help it. And she hated herself for making you feel the same way when she was with Vision.

At some point she just stopped showing up for your get-togethers. She knew she was being selfish, but seeing you with Sharon was driving her mad. Everytime she tried to spend time with you, Sharon had to be there.

But her breaking point reached her on Kate's birthday party. In the middle of the reunion, Sharon's parents called her and she walked up stairs to attend the call.

Wanda found you sitting alone in the sofa and she decided to go talk to you. She was finally having your attention all to herself, you were telling her some dumb joke about ballons, a little bit flushed because of the drinks you had that night, your hair alredy a mess after dancing... She thought you looked beautiful. She tucked a hair behind your ear and you smiled sweetly at her...

It was a very cute moment, just you two talking, so close from each other. Until a pair of arms suround you from behind, you looked up from your seat on the couch and smiled at Sharon.

- Hey! Did you finished the call with your parents? - you asked her.

- Yeah... They just wanted to know about my week but a cut the call soon to be back... Did i miss anything? - she asked, looking at Wanda and you.

- No, i was just telling some jokes, and Wanda was the lucky one to hear them - you said.

Sharon hugged you tighly and Wanda wanted nothing more but dissapear.

- Oh well, i hope Wanda doesn't mind but i need to steal you for a second... there is something i wanna tell you.

Wanda denied with her head.

- Oh no, it´s alright, i was about to leave anyways... Pietro is in his way to take me home so... I should be getting ready.

You said goodbye to Wanda and followed Sharon out to the garden. Wanda remained in place, looking at your hands intertwined with Sharon as you walked out. She left the house as soon as you were out of her sight.

Sharon Carter was a very intelligent girl. Her aunt Peggy taught her to be perceptive, to pay attention to the little details, so it was no surprise to know that she almost immediately noticed the tension between you and Wanda.

She wasn't aware of the full story, she only knew that you and Wanda had a fight before leaving for the university, but it was fixed almost immediately as soon as you had the opportunity to talk about it.

But she had a feeling that there was something more than just "friendship" problems. And that feeling sting her harder the moment she saw you and Wanda talking on the couch. She was too close to your face, and the smile you were giving to her... She needed to do something.

That is the reason why, that night, she asked you to be her girlfriend. You were a bit tipsy, and the euphoria of the moment made you say yes to her right away.

It was just the next morning, when you woke up a little hangover when you realized what had happened last night. You wanted to feel happy, but something just didn't feel right.

Sharon was a great a person, and you knew she would be an amazing girlfriend but now that you were official, something felt off to you.

Perhaps it was because it took you so long to be an actual couple. However, you couldn't just go and tell her you weren't sure about being her girlfriend. You felt some sort of responsibility towards her, like you needed to respond to her feelings. You couldn't just ask her to go back to just date again.

So you got use to the idea of being girlfriends. It couldn't be that bad. At the end, you liked her, she liked you. It could actually work.

Wanda found out about your, now official, relationship a few days later. She noticed how Sharon started to use pet names with you "Babe this... Babe that". She also started to be more affectioned towards you, increasing the PDA at a hundred percent.

She cried once you confirmed it to her. Not in front of you, of course, but at the safety of her room.

She knew she didn't have any right to feel that way, but she couldn't help it. She wish it was easier to let you go.

You still tried to make time for her though, not wanting to jeopardize your just restored friendship. But Sharon always wanted to tag along in your plans. One day Wanda just stopped going out with you, avoiding any uncomfortable moment between your girlfriend and her.

You noticed this change in her behaviour, and when you expressed this concerns with Sharon, she just brush it off saying: Well, perhaps it's for the best, that way we can make more plans for the both of us.

You were confused at her answer, but you just let it go. You'll make plans with Wanda later to talk to her alone. Sharon, in the other hand, made her goal to keep you as away from Wanda as possible.

In the latest days of summer your friends planned a weekend getaway to go camping. Wanda didn't want to go, but everyone told her it would be fun. She turned down every invitation until you were the one to ask her to go. When you knocked on her door that night she didn't find the strength to say no to you. It would be just one night though.

So, there she was, walking next to Kate and Peter looking for a good place to establish the camp. You were walking some steps ahead of them with Sharon by your side, and Wanda was already regretting going.

You had planned spend time with her during the camp. That's why, the moment you found the right place, you asked Wanda to help you set up the tents, meanwhile, Kate asked Sharon to help her take out from the cars all the food they brought.

Sharon walked away, not without giving you a last glance. All she saw was Wanda smiling at you while you read the instructions for the tent.

At night, Sharon asked to talk to you in private. You had spend all the day bounding with Wanda, laughing and making jokes, and you could tell Sharon wasn't happy at all.

- I just don't understand why are you so determined on spending time with her... I'm your gilfriend and i'm here, you should be spending more time with me - she said.

- Sharon, i'm sorry if you felt left out, but Wanda is my best friend... we've been distant lately and i wanted to spend more time with her before the summer ends.. you and me, we alredy spent a lot of time together...

She sighed.

- I know baby, but she needs to understand you have a girlfriend now, that she is not your main priority anymore... Now, please, let's just go to eat some smores and have a fun night.

You just nodded and she kissed you.

You were mad at her. For some reason. Deep down in you, a tiny voice was trying to scream. And that voice was saying that Wanda would always be your main priority.

Later at night, when you found yourself unable to sleep, you sneaked out of the tent you shared with Sharon. You were surprise to find Wanda sitting next to the campfire.

- Hey... Can't sleep? - you asked to caught her attention.

She turned to look at you.

- Yeah, something like that... Kate snores - she said smiling.

- Ohh really? - you laughed - That's quite funny... So you can't sleep because of her snores?

She nodded.

- Yep, i'm kind of a light sleeper, any sound can keep me awake all night.

- Well, then i'll be glad to stay awake all night with you - you said taking a seat next to her.

- Are you sure you want to do that? - she asked- I kind of noticed that Sharon...

You interrumpted her.

- I know, but i don't care. Wanda you're my best friend, if i wanna spend time with you i will spend time with you... I'll deal with Sharon later.

Wanda felt nostalgic at your words.

- What's wrong? - you asked.

She looked at you.

- It's just that... your a better friend than i am. You have a girlfriend and still try to make time for me... i never did that back when i was with Vision.

You smiled at her words.

- Wanda... we are kind of adults now, if i kept acting like when i was in high school i would have a problem. I'm more mature now, i guess i can have a girlfriend and a best friend. You were younger and he was your first boyfriend, i now understand why you acted like that.

- This is what i'm talking about, you're a better person than me Y/N, i don't deserve you.

- Hey don't say that. You are one of the best persons i know Wanda, you can't keep punishing yourself for things you did when you were 16. Like i said the other day at the park, i forgive you, i did it a long time ago.

She looked at the sky.

- I just wish things were different. If only i could turn back time... - she said desperate.

- Wanda please stop, let's just enjoy this moment, okay?

You offered her a hug that she replied immediately. Then you just chill under the stars.

- I got into UCLA - she said out of nowhere after some minutes.

- What? - you asked excited - Are you serious?

She nodded her head smiling.

- Yes, the letter came in this morning... I got in.

- Wanda that is amazing... we will be together in college, like we always dreamed about!

You kept celebrating her for some more minutes and then you just went on talking about the campus and the city.

Wanda watched you in awe, how your eyes sparkled when you talked, the way you smiled and expressed. And she fell deeper for you. When she heard you talk about your future plans with her she couldn't help but daydream about a life by your side.

She daydreamed about living with you, being your girlfriend, marrying you, having kids with you... God, she wanted you bad.

That's why, immersed in the euphoria of the moment, the next words came out of her mouth.

- I love you so much...

And your whole world stopped right there. You stopped your explanation of why your dorm hall was the best in the campus to look at her straight in the eyes.

- What?

Wanda knew there was no turning back. She said it, and she decided to stand to her words.

- I love you so much Y/N, you really don't have and idea of how much. I love your eyes, your voice, your personality; i love your stupid jokes about life... I love how you talk, how you move, how you walk. I love how you treat me, how you protect me. I love how, despite everything i've done, you're still by my side... I think i just love everything about you.

You hear her speak and your heart beat at hundred times per second. The words you always wanted to hear, she was finally saying them.

- Wanda, what are you talking about? - you asked, still in disbelief.

The girl's heart was about to explode. But she needed to keep talking, she couldn't stopped just then.

- Y/N I don't expect you to reciprocate my feelings, not after everything I put you through... But i just need to come clean, can i be honest with you?

You nodded dumbly. You had so many questions, but you knew nothing would come out of your mouth. So you let her talk.

- Y/n i drop out off college because of you, and before you blame yourself, it was mostly because i missed you... You and i had a dream, going to NYU together was our thing, and it shouldn't have been with Vision... I guess, not only the college thing but everyhting, it was never Vision. It was you all along. You were my first love Y/N, i shouldn't have give up on you... on us. Yes, our friendship is the most important thing for me, but if we could be something more... Ughh, now things are just weird between us, and that sucks... and i miss you - she knew she was rambling, but she needed to get everything out - and now you're with someone else, and that's fine but, i just wish it was me... Because even when i made mistakes, it was always you.

When she finished talking you were loss for words. Your heart, your mind, nothing was working correctly. It was like the whole world faded because Wanda told you she loved you.

That's all your mind registered: she loved you.

- Wanda... i don't know what to say to be honest - you said.

She was a mess, her heart was beating like crazy, she was all flustered because of the nerves and her whole body was shaking. She wanted to hear your answer, but she was also afraid of what she might hear.

- I wish things were different too... - you said looking at her - You know, i'm really confuse right now. Sharon... she's someone special to me, i wouldn't want to hurt her, i guess now i understand what you felt about Vision. But, i want to be honest with you too... I don't want to lose you again, you're even more special to me... I want you to be in my life forever. It truly seems like timing never work for us, right? - you joked, making her smile a little - We can be friends Wanda, i'm really excited to be in college with you, if you want that too... I just don't want to lose you.

She started to cry.

- Oh Y/N, i would love to be in your life forever, even if you're not with me, i don't want to lose you either... Thanks for giving me a second chance.

You hugged her even tighter than before, now crying as well. You two stood there for some minutes, melting in each other's embrace. When you broke the hug you noticed it was almost 2 am, so you decided to go back to your tent, wishing her good luck with Kate's snores.

You didn't have much sleep that night though. Your mind kept you up all night.

Wanda told you she love you. She confessed her feelings for you and now it was up to you to take the chance. You looked to your side and found Sharon sleeping soundly. You knew it was unfair for her that you felt that way, but you couldn't deny your feelings: deep down you knew it was Wanda, cause it had always been Wanda.

The next morning you and your friends left the camp and went back home. Sharon noticed you were a little bit quite, but when she asked you about it you just said it was because you hadn't sleep well. Wich wasn't completely a lie.

You spent two days more with her before she flied back to Los Angeles. She was excited cause she got her acceptance letter from Princeton. You were happy for her too, but the situation made you wonder about your future with her. She wouldn't be around UCLA anymore, and that would change your whole dynamic.

She told you not to worry, kissed you one last time and went back home.

In the remaining days you prepared your luggage to return to the university.

Wanda was in some sort of trance. After you told her to be just friends she felt happy cause you would still be in her life, but she also was sad because it wasn't in the way she wanted.

When she told everything to Pietro he told her it was brave to come clean with you, but he was also worried for her sister's feelings.

- I know Y/N well enough to know she won't hurt you, but i'm worried you two are making a mistake. This whole thing of "let's just be friends" can be risky for the both of you.

She just replied:

- We're still friends and that's all that matters, we'll live our college dream together and everything will be fine.

You flied back to Los Angeles, now with Wanda and her parents.

Pietro flied back to Switzerland.

And Sharon flied to New Jersey.

The first weeks of the course went normal. Wanda loved the campus and was thrilling because you were there with her. You showed to her all of your favorite spots and you two settle a schedule to spend time together, mostly studying.

Wanda immediately felt the change from NYU. She was genuinely excited for her classes, she genuinely loved the school, she didn't have to pretend cause she felt happier.

You were happier with her there too. Although something was still feeling out of place.

You thought it was because Sharon wasn't there anymore. You used to call her every night to tell her about your day. She told you all about her campus and her program. You listened to her attentive, but she knew something was off. She could feel it too.

But both of you were too afraid to mention it.

The days passed, and everything felt like a roller coaster for you: in the day everything was exciting and brilliant because you spent it with Wanda. But at night, when you talked to Sharon over the phone, everything felt wrong. Every night you went to sleep with a pit in your stomach wondering why you couldn't be happy with Sharon, but why you felt so complete with Wanda.

Sharon Carter was a very intelligent girl. From the moment you told her Wanda was going to be with you at UCLA she knew you two were doomed. She didn't have to know your complete history with Wanda to know she was someone special for you. Someone who she couldn't compete with, cause she'll always lose to Wanda if it was up to you.

But as intelligent and perceptive as she was, she was firstly, a girl in love. So, leaving behind any insecurity, she was hoping you would chose her. That's why she tried to make things work for the two of you, for as long as she could. A month was enough to completely wear out your relationship.

As intense as her love was, she knew she couldn't alter the course of fate. She recognized that you had alredy found your way with another person, and Sharon understood that she had to let you go, accepting that this time, she couldn't change the destiny of your love.

Sharon called you, like every night. But this time there wasn't any softness in her voice. You knew, from the moment she said you needed to talk, what was the night was heading to.

The conversation was long, tired, and full of regretness. She regretted meeting you. You regretted taking it too far. Both of you regretted making each other so unhappy.

Needless to say, it wasn't an amicable breakup. She cried and you didn't stop asking for forgiveness until she said goodbye and hang up the phone.

You spent your night alone. You cried, but when the sadness left your body completely, you felt lighter. As if the crying had washed away the guilt and the weight from your soul.

The next day you told Wanda about your break up with Sharon. She asked you if you were okay and you mindelessly said yes.

- C'mon Y/N, you know you can be vulnerable with me, there's no need to put on a brave face.

You insisted that everything was fine, and after a few more attempts, she dropped the subject to avoid making you uncomfortable.

She was surprised to hear the news. Sharon seemed like a nice girl, and even when she knew she wasn't veey comfortable with your frienship, she wanted for you to be happy.

She tried to avoid having any inappropriate thoughts, but she couldn't stop herself to wonder about you and her. She knew you had just come out of a relationship, everything was still too fresh, but deep down, a flicker of hope had ignited in her.

You on the other hand was confused with yourself. You wanted to feel bad, to be sad, to grieve your relationship with Sharon. You felt like a complete idiot for not feeling bad. God, your girlfriend had broken up with you, and it had mostly been your fault, but you couldn't feel sad. After crying that first night when you broke up, you never cried again. Now what you felt was guilt for feeling nothing.

Some days later Wanda asked Pietro to call you. She was worried about you cause she thought you were keeping all your pain to yourself. So she decided to call in the big guns.

When you saw Pietro's name on the phone you were excited but a little confused. He made small talk for a while and told you about Switzerland and his girlfriend. When he finally dropped the bomb on why he called you, you couldn't say you were surprised.

- She's just worried about you Y/N.

You sighed.

- I know, but there's no need to be worried, i'm fine.

- Y/N, i'm on the other side of the world and i can tell you're not fine, i can hear ir in your voice. Wanda thinks you're keeping it all to yourself and she just wants you to have someone to talk.

You knew there was no use in trying to denied anymore. Pietro was a close friend. You grew up together as well. He was like a brother to you. That's why you decided to finally speak to him.

- It's just that... I have nothing to talk about Pietro.

You told him all your concerns about your break up with Sharon and you vent with him.

He listened to you carefully, not saying anything at first.

- Why do I feel like crap? - you asked when you finished - I really wanted this relationship to work, i felt something for Sharon, without a doubt. But when things fell apart i felt almost relived that it was over... I'm such a jerk.

- No, you're not, everyone has a way to cope, and just because you're not miserable and sulking doesn't mean you're bad, please don't torture yourself over it. You truly believed you wanted to be with her, you gave your best effort in that relatioship but you can't force yourself to love someone. Sharon was special, but maybe you tried too hard to love her. But why?

You felt your heart racing at his question. You knew damn well why.

- I think i was afraid of what could happen if i wasn't with Sharon.

- So you used her... and don't get me wrong, it can be really fun as a distraction, but when it's over, you think about the girl you really like, the one that broke your heart. Maybe that's why you feel nothing but freedom. Now you can make your own decisions Y/N.

You ended the call a minutes later.

For some days you thought about what Pietro said. You were experiencing so many emotions that you asked Wanda to suspend you study sessions together for a few days.

Wanda thought you were taking time apart from her because of your break up. Maybe you wanted time for yourself without her.

It sucked for her cause she believed you were best friends again. But even if you weren't her best friend, she knew you would always be friends.

It was almost ironic. You two never got the timing right. She shot you down and then you did the same to her and now...

She needed to focus her attention on something else.

She sent you a text letting you know she would be at the volleyball tryouts, so if you needed anything you'll knew where to find her.

You texted her back a thumb up emoji and a happy face, wishing her good luck.

You were alone in your room when suddenly Pietro's words rang in your head: Now you can make your own decisions Y/N.

A power took over your body and you walked out of the dorm hall to go to the volleyball court. You were nervious, but you had something to do.

Wanda was talking to the volleyball coach in her office, answering some medical questions fro the formal papers, when you suddenly opened the door.

- Y/N, what are you doing here? - she asked confused.

- Hey, emm i'm sorry coach, i just have to say something...- the coach nodded at you and you looked back at Wanda - Um, are you free for dinner tonight?

- Yes - Wanda said shocked.

- All right, then it's a date... - you said smiling and closing the door to leave.

Wanda smiled like never before. She felt on cloud 9. Her face was all red and her body shaking in excitement. She looked at the coach, rememebering where she was.

- I'm sorry, what was the question? - she asked nervously.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

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aarafox · 11 months

Text

On Stolitz, Desire and Misunderstandings

I’ve thought about them so much for the past few days that I just have to put my thoughts somewhere. This might be far from structured/coherent but contains everything that has been running around in my brain lately. Feel free to interact with me about this because they’re driving me insane (in a positive way).

Quick disclaimer: I’ve watched everything in nearly one sitting a few days ago and am new to the fandom, so I might be unaware of commonly known info or things the creators have said or confirmed. If you come across any of my questions that have been answered already, please forgive me for not knowing and feel free to enlighten me! Let’s begin~

The main thing that got me thinking about this so much is Blitz’s line in ep 7 when he brings Stolas home after their failed date: “Don’t act like what we have is anything but you wanting me to fuck you, okay? You make that really clear, all the time.”

But the thing is, he is wrong. We as the viewer know this, how Stolas chokes on his food when he sees that Blitzy calls, how he lunges to pick up the phone and how his eyes turn into little hearts when he hears the question. If anything, Stolas is smitten with Blitz.

He even calls Gabriella a “mood” when she asks Alejandro why he won’t love her. It’s indisputable that he’s thinking about Blitz here.

And how much he actually likes Blitz becomes even more clear to us at the start of season 2, when they’re kids. Stolas falls in love at first sight and blushes several times.

And then, 25 years later, he is delighted to meet Blitz again. After the initial (joking?) assumption that Blitz has come here to “ravish him”, he tries to make gentle conversation and asks him how he’s been. Blitz is the one who decides to initiate sexual relations—that is, he pretends to start it, and decides to keep it up when he hears Stolas chirp about how happy he is that it’s his “first ever friend” who wants to do him. But Stolas, before this, was surprised by Blitz’s advances and unsure how to react. Stolas, if anything, has to believe that Blitz is very sexually attracted to him.

That is why Blitz’s line in episode 7 fascinates me this much; one would think the reverse of what he says is true. Stolas has no reason whatsoever to believe that Blitz ever wanted more from him than sex/the grimoire, especially with how their relations began. So it strikes me that apparently, to Blitz, it hurts him to think that Stolas wants nothing else from him. He even begins to cry there in the van as he begins to reject the prince.

See the tears in his eyes? Why is that? Is he embarrassed? Angry? Does he feel guilty for putting Stolas in a “disgraceful” picture? Is he thinking about entirely different things that happened to him in the past?

And Stolas cries when Blitz is gone, because, well, he does think of Blitz as more than a sex friend. He was so excited to be asked out by him, he made himself look pretty, tried his best to make conversation with him, thought Blitz was actually taking him on their first date ever! He thought Blitz had called him out because he wanted to spend time with him, so he did his best to make the date a success, but all he received from Blitz was, well, nothing… He even tried to end the night on a more positive note by asking Blitz to come inside for something other than sex, perhaps to drink some wine and talk about what happened (or watch a movie, or cuddle 🥺). But when he hears that his sentiment of just wanting to spend time together has never come across—not now, not ever before—and Blitz actually believes Stolas just wants to frolic, that’s when Stolas leaves it for what it is and ends up crying.

(God I feel so bad for him, my heart)

And he spends a LONG time trying to show Blitz, via his texts, that sex is not the only thing that he’s after.

But he only gets one-word responses from Blitz. Nothing, literally nothing to keep going on. It’s no wonder he loses faith in that whatever they had could ever be anything more. And Blitz probably has commitment issues or is afraid of things not working out and he ends up keeping Stolas at a distance—until it’s too late.

And it just kills me that he does care about Stolas but somehow won’t admit it, won’t show it. And yet he sounds so hurt there in that van, when he accuses Stolas of merely wanting to be his sex friend. And he actually cries. For that reason, and for many other reasons not all clearly laid out for us.

Meanwhile Stolas has been crushing on him for 25 years. It’s only natural for him to propose the deal they made: he wants Blitz to be close to him (and he assumes Blitz enjoyed sex with him that first time, since he slept there for the entire night while at first only claiming he could do it “real fast”) and Blitz wants his grimoire. This is the perfect way for Stolas to get Blitz to be with him, because, frankly, he doesn’t have many other reasons to meet up with him. So they make this deal: Stolas gets to be together with him for once a month, and Blitz gets the grimoire. Perfect right?

Except when Stolas discovers that Blitz doesn’t even begin to know how much Stolas actually cares. That’s why he keeps sending those long texts, he tries so hard to let Blitz know they could be doing anything else and he’d love that too. That night after the date he already begins with those attempts, by telling him he enjoyed spending time with Blitz and suggesting things to do inside which Blitz misunderstands for him trying to get him into his bed.

But damn, if that was all Stolas was after, he wouldn’t get so depressed that he’d drink until passing out. He is heartbroken. And somehow, for some reason, so is Blitz. The first thing he does when he gets home is opening his phone to a selfie he took of them while Stolas was asleep.

And others have pointed this out as well, but Stolas doesn’t know about this picture and that Blitz smiled while he took it. On all the pictures Stolas has of Blitz, Blitz looks like he’s not enjoying himself at all.

So what must he think when he sends Blitz his reply that he could be in the hospital for a while in case he wants to visit, and Blitz doesn’t answer?

Well, that Blitz doesn’t want to come. That he doesn’t care enough.

Indeed, if there’s anyone who hasn’t been showing his true feelings or intentions, it’s Blitz. Stolas compliments him, calls him darling and “his” Blitzy, makes himself pretty for their date, and (for instance in ep 2 of season 2) blushes big time multiple times.

He’s had it bad for Blitz for ages, but he (correctly? incorrectly?) concludes that this is not mutual. And he has every reason to think so! Blitz treats their sexy adventures as a business transaction, is all serious and stoic to Stolas about it except for the rare occasion where he does show how much he likes it, like after Stolas rescues him from the demon hunters and he grins and seduces Stolas before kissing him.

But the times when Blitz talks about them to others? Those are moments Stolas doesn’t know about and doesn’t get to see, like when Blitz talks to Striker and stutters like mad trying to explain what they are and aren’t. He never outright says that they’re not dating. He doesn’t even deny Millie’s words when she says they’re boyfriends.

(M&M totally know I’m wheezing)

It just drives me insane how Blitz isn’t honest with his feelings, especially towards Stolas. He probably chooses to believe that Stolas only wants to have sex with him, because that’s more convenient and safer for him, and enables him to keep Stolas at a distance.

Perhaps that is why he never properly responds to Stolas’s texts, never jumps to the opportunity to agree to Stolas’s indirectly asked questions or suggestions. Getting closer might be a bad idea somehow—but after those texts he has to understand what the prince’s intentions are, right? They just don’t talk about it at all; we also aren’t told whether they still do it or not, or just exchange the book like Stolas’s texts suggest. This is striking compared to season 1, where we got scenes of them in bed or talking about their next meet up.

It isn’t until Stolas’s life is in actual danger when Blitz begins to realise how much he cares.

“He can get hurt?” His eyes are trembling with disbelief. After that he finally sends Stolas a text first, and then begins typing again, and stops. I imagine he started typing a yes, but stops himself for some reason. I really hope they’ll show us what Blitz was thinking in that moment. Why would he not go to see Stolas? Because he feels guilty? Because he’s afraid he’ll start caring even more when he sees him wounded in that bed?

But again, for Stolas this just means that he doesn’t care, and the poor owl curls up and turns away from his phone.

#stolitz #helluva boss #my brain is doing things #also if I'm posing any questions I should've already known the answer to please be gentle with me #stolas #stolas goetia #blitzo #stolas x blitzo #helluva boss meta #stolitz meta #I am greatly enjoying this show #not planning to interact with criticism #click on the pics for better quality etc etc #ngl their kissing scene was my fave moment lol... they looked so happy together #can't wait for the next ep uuuuuuugh sobbing

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atxxokirina · 1 year

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You're My Mirror.

Lo'ak x Omatikayan fem reader

warnings ;; slight bullying/mention of bullying, reader being insecure, some fluff near the end.

quick author's note! ✧ okay, so! I have 12 fingers irl, and i relate to lo'ak so much when it comes to him being self conscious about his hands, so i just had to write this. not only for myself, but hopefully for anyone else who feels outcast. <3 (i used y/n instead of my name to make it feel more inclusive. enjoy!)

You were born differently. The usual Na'vi has 4 fingers, but you? You came out with 6 instead. Your parents hoped everything would be fine with you, even after the Tsahík at the time insisted that you were perfectly fine and healthy, and that it was just an unusual mutation.

The festival was in full swing as the clan celebrated the newly mated couple. The music was loud, the drinks were flowing, and were dancing and laughing.

But you were not having fun. Instead, you're standing in the back corner, arms folded, trying to hide your hands. You hated that you always hid them away, but you knew better. You knew that if you didn't, all eyes would be on you, and conversations would start up about you again. It had been that way ever since you were a kid. Either you were teased for having 6 fingers, or being accused for being not being full Na'vi. No matter what- it was always something.

As you watched some people form a circle, holding hands and dancing together, you felt a pang of envy.. You had wished to join in, so badly, but you were much too afraid of allowing your hands to touch with anyone again. Your mind flashed to when you were young. The vivid memory of being called a freak, being called an alien, and the absolute hell of others threatening to sever your extra fingers off.. as if you weren't right in front of them.

Your deep thoughts were interrupted by Mo'at approaching you. "Y/n, come join us." She holds out her hand for you. "Do not let your past consume you. Allow yourself to have fun. With us, with your family."

Your eyes dart to hers, a soft gasp escaping your mouth as she startled you. You listen to her words, hesitant first at but eventually giving in after some thinking. She was only right, you can't live like this forever. You took Mo'at's hand and joined the circle. For a while everything felt fine, you had let your body relax as you let the fears you had fall away. You closed your eyes and danced, hips swaying with the music as you formed hands with the other people in the circle.

The music was beautiful, and the voices around you were soothing. You feel an abrupt yank on your hand and instantly opened your eyes, your tail going alert and ears perking up. You see Aonung and his friend Nashvi on each side of you, grinning at each other. "Ugh, fuck off!" You say in an attempt to pull your arms away from the two boys.

"Oh, now why are you struggling so hard? Trying to hide something from us aren't you?" Aounung teases. You whine and pull back again, already knowing the direction this is going in. Ever since you'd arrived to their village with the Sully's, Aonung and his friends would make it their job to bully you daily.

The two chuckle as Aonung lifts up your hand. "Look at this! What do you even call this freakshow? She's fucking gross, isn't she?" He yells out, pulling your arm and holding it in the air. The space around you goes quiet, all eyes now on you. You see some faces recoil as shame fills your body. "Stop! Just let me go-"

"..what the fuck is that?"

"Does she have- six fingers?"

"Ma Eywa.. I've never seen anything like that.."

"So unfortunate.. poor girl... I feel bad for her parents"

You begin to hear multiple voices murmer around you as tears well in your eyes.

"Oh great mother.." Neteyam speaks under his breath, watching everything unfold.

"Huh? What's going on?" Lo'ak questions while stuffing his face with Teylu that Neytiri had made. He looks up to see a group of boys pushing you around and messing with you.

"6 fingers? Really? Eywa could've made you a simple freak with 5, but she just had to keep going!" Aonung says as him and his peers continue to laugh at you.

".. fuck" Lo'ak mutters, making his way toward Aonung and pushing him by his shoulder. "Leave her alone, fish lips. I'm not gonna ask you again." He sternly demands.

"Ohhh? Two freaks now, I see.. Just makes this freakshow even better!" Aonung ignores Lo'ak's warning. Lo'ak slaps Aonung and grabs your arm, pulling you next to him and gripping your hand.

"I'll beat your ass again if I have to, bitch. Don't make me fuck you up." You stare at Lo'ak, impressed at his confidence.

With your hand still in his, he walks you over to a secluded area on the shore and sits you down as the bioluminescent plants around you move with the wind. You cry out, covering your face with your hands. "What's wrong with me..? Why can't I just be normal, like everyone else.." Tears stream down your face while your heart consumes itself with pain and humiliation.

Lo'ak places his hand on your shoulder, feeling empathetic towards you. "I know how you feel, y/n" he says softly. "I have an extra finger too, remember?" You looked at him, wiping the tears from your cheeks. "I know.." You sniffle. "I just wish.. I wish they'd accept me, you know? Ever since I've been here.. I have nothing but nice to them.. and I get this in return? I'm tired of it, Lo'ak. I'm so fucking tired.." You speak through broken cries and sniffles.

"You're not alone," he continued. "And you're not gross or weird.. You're just different, just like me." He cups your face and wipes your tears, giving your wet cheek a soft kiss. He intertwines his fingers with yours as he turns your head to face him. "And after tonight, Aonung and his friends will never bother you again okay? I promise."

"W-what are you gonna do?" You ask, a shuddered sigh coming from your mouth while looking into his eyes. "Doesn't matter, mama. All that matters is that I'm gonna take care of it. You know I've got you." Lo'ak reassures, patting your head. Your eyebrows narrow as you smile, bringing Lo'ak into a hug and resting your head in the crook of his neck. "Thank you, Lo'ak.."

He rubs his hand across your back, holding your shoulder and pulling away from the hug, wholeheartedly gazing into your eyes. Lo'ak licks his lips, opening his mouth to say something, visibly nervous. "..I see you, y/n."

Your pupils widen, tail flicking back and forth in excitement and content after hearing his words. A great feeling of ease washes over you, it feels as if you've finally gotten the one thing you have been waiting for. You look back into his eyes with a soft, loving gaze.

"I see you, Lo'ak."

oh my lord , this is lowkey the first fanfiction i have written in awhilleeee, so i can't tell if it's as good as i think it is. all criticism is welcome, just be nice and don't hurt my feelings pls! 🫶

as always, my writing style/layout (?) is heavily inspired by the queen herself, @pandorxxx <3 love you bae!

#avatar #avatar fluff #atwow #avatar the way of water #loak fic #ff #fanfiction #fics #imagines #neteyam #aonung #loak sully #neteyam sully #loak x reader

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