#anyway hope everyone's well

[kirisaki-daichi-scenarios]

the boys as bodyguards

dedicated to absolutely no one. sure this is an asks blog - does that mean i have to actually answer them? i know i know bad admins bad admins whatcha gonna do whatcha gonna do when they come for you but i had a dream ages ago now that involved bodyguards, tsunamis, and also a shit ton of murder. don't ask. anyway, it got me pondering. and then it took literal months to write this so i figured i'd post what i've got so far, and maybe i'll update with the rest of the boys later, depending on how well this does/how much time i have

hanamiya makoto

hanamiya’s the package deal

he’s the chief advisor; he’s the doctor; he’s the bodyguard; he’s the sniper. just a right hand man in every way possible.

i mean, he’s not literally your right hand man: he’s the leader of a team, and often it’ll be one of his men there next to you at events, but he’s always supervising or coordinating or collecting intel

ie he’s dedicated to his job. he does like engineering spider’s webs after all.

having said that, he’s also an uncontrollable prick

he’s the best at giving you advice, both in terms of navigating high society and in terms of actual business advice, but is he going to give that advice without slipping in a snide comment about how you should really know all this by now? when you tell him to make sure to take a break some time, is he going to stop himself from saying “maybe if you weren’t so incredibly useless on your own, i’d be able to.”

and sure maybe he’s breaking the universal declaration of human rights with what he does to the people who dare to try harm you, but you don’t know about that

need to know basis type beat

you don’t even have access to the full floor plans of your own property, which includes a basement you’ll never know about, let alone step foot in. hanamiya keeps that information very close to his chest.

gotta make sure his employer has plausable deniability

gotta make double sure that you don’t find out about half the things he does - from the ways he sources his information, to his very dodgy organised crime links, to the number of people that have sadly lost their lives in the name of “fuck it, you’re pissing me off” - because he hates when you bang on about bullshit like “laws” and “morals”

after all, if everyone followed your beloved laws and morals, then you’d have no need for his services

as he always tells you, he’s just your pet necessary evil

yamazaki hiroshi

i reckon he only got into the bodyguard business because he spent his childhood wanting to be a samurai but, well you know, that’s not really a job opportunity anymore

what it does mean though is that he’s all about bushido: mastering his work, bravery, honesty, etc - and above all else loyalty to one’s employer

on a random thursday afternoon, he’ll tell you, completely nonchalantly, straight face, “i would die for you if that’s what it takes. on my life, i’ll always keep you safe.”

you’re staring at him like wtf and/or trying to stop yourself blushing, but he thinks that’s a completely normal thing to say cause he’s just following bushido

of course, late one night, he’ll wake up realise how weird that came across and he’ll spend the next week trying not to blush whenever you talk to him

just like the time he spent a week kicking himself after you walked in on him training, shirtless and rather sweaty, and when you told him he should take a break, he said “but i need to train so my body can be at its best for you”

again, at the time that sounded very reasonable, serious, and totally bushido to him. it’s only later that he’s freaking out in his room like why in god’s name did he say that.

but hey that’s bodyguard!yamazaki for you. a little weird, a little socially inept, but loyal to a fault

haizaki shougo

can you imagine the number of jobs that this man has lost for sleeping on the job?

he’s only got his current gig looking after you because his prices are cheaper and you were getting desperate to find someone in your budget

he’s a ...uhh… unique bodyguard? in the sense that he’ll get you out of harms way eventually, but "eventually" is the key word there

haizaki actively ignores intel that a certain location might be dangerous, because he really just wants to get into fights. sure you might get in the way occasionally, maybe even get some nasty bruises, but hey you get what you pay for.

you want a good bodyguard, save up some money, idiot.

literally the only reason he got into being a bodyguard is so he can beat people up legally (and because he got dishourably discharged from the military); he doesn’t care that much about the whole ‘protecting’ side of things

he’s also the type to ditch you the minute a better paying job comes up (possibly combat work as a mercenary). however he’s not as cold-hearted as he may seem, and he’ll happily spend a day of leave breaking into your penthouse

so that when you return in the evening, he’s there sat on an armchair, grinning smugly, “man your security’s turned to shit since i left.”

shortly followed by, “miss me?”

jason silver

jason’s the quintessential bodyguard, cause, after all, having a very muscular 6’11 man follow you everywhere you go isn’t exactly subtle

but he’s recognisable for other reasons as well.

like the fact that he’ll accompany you to formal balls, and he’ll be the only man there with an undone tie - it’s such a massive argument trying to get him to wear an appropriate suit instead of his usual hoodies and sweatpants, that can anyone blame you for not having the energy to insist he stops undoing his tie as well?

he’s also not exactly one for professionality. like you’ll be minding your business, trying to network, and suddenly you’ll hear a wolf whistle by your ear and a “wouldn’t mind me a bit of that”

“jason, that’s the ambassador to norway. we’re having her over for dinner next week, so, with all due respect, shut the fuck up. and whisper next time, for heaven’s sake! what if someone had heard you?”

“shit, is it a crime to like some nice tits in this economy?”

and when you glare at him, genuinely furious, he grins, puts his hands up, and says, “sorry, sorry. forgot you don’t like me having eyes for anyone else, boss.”

but don’t get me wrong, jason’s not all evil contra to fujimaki’s propaganda

he is an incredibly good bodyguard - those animal instincts really help him out when it comes to getting you out of a sniper’s line of sight, or saving you from a bullet, or just assessing a room for potential entry points. and he packs a mean punch if anyone tries to try something on you, a solid ko.

no one’s getting past him essentially

the only problem is that it’s incredibly difficult to thank jason for saving your life, cause the last thing he needs is an ego boost or feeling like you owe him.

“seriously jason. i don’t know how i can ever repay you.”

“usually the payslip’s enough,” he smirks, “but you know that little lady ambassador-“

unsuprisingly, he’s not invited to the dinner.

#also vibing a slasher au #cause hanamiya with a mask when #but i'm supposed to be working #i got a singe spurt of productivity today and i wasted it on finishing this post #now if that's not embarassing what is #anyway hope everyone's well #stay safe out there #well with these bodyguards i guess the safety's guaranteed :D #hanamiya makoto #yamazaki hiroshi #haizaki shougo #jason silver #kiridai #kirisaki daichi scenarios #kirisaki daiichi #jabberwock #knb #kuroko no basket #the basketball which kuroko plays #headcanons #imagines #hcs #x reader #bodyguard #bodyguard au #drabble #flirting #older!au #rich reader #x you

[liquidstar]

If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)

At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.

Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.

#i think about this story sometimes like yeah I'm proud of them for that too actually. good job baby brothers #they're not babies anymore of course they're turning 20 next year which is crazy #but they're still the type of people who'd do something if they saw something of this sort happen for sure #respectful of women and everyone else too. they're good guys #I'm glad I ended up with them living in my house against my will for like 14 years #anyway i have no idea where i was for all this but my best guess is probably a friends house given the time period #i was always at my besties house lol #i hope she's doing well too actually. haven't spoken in forever... #bestie from greek elementary school... if you're out there... let's get muffins and fanta at the bakery across the street again someday 💜☮️

[diamondsheep]

What do you mean >:3 face ?

He got embarrassed bc Sanji keeps annoying him with "not" knowing about that face ( which he does on purpose just to get that same reaction from the Marimo )

#i had to draw this bc I'm obsessed with Sanji's (/wo) face #he does it all the time and it is so cute :3 #anyway here is my last drawing of 2023 !! ahdkfks it's jusr a silly comic pftt #but hey i wanted to end the year with a similar comic to my first zosan comic c: #and well i hope that everyone has an AMAZING AND HAPPY NEW YEAAAR 🎊🥳🎊🥳🎊🥳🎊✨️ #adhkgkd i promise more Zosans next year 💚💛💚💛💚💛💚 #zosan #zoro #sanji #roronoa zoro #black leg sanji #one piece #one piece fanart #sanzo #my drawings #my art #diamondsheep art

[reallybadblackoutpoems]

history of scots affairs, from mdcxxxvii to mdcxli (1841) - spalding club

"mmmm macking cheese"

#macking cheese #in the michaelwave #all i have been able to eat is macking cheese #i cant stop #its a disease #macking cheese disease #anyway #hope everyone is doing well #im at theatre callbacks rn #blackout poetry #blackout poem #author #book #poetry

[kim-woonhak]

이젠 내게 기대 편히 쉬어도 돼 // Now you can lean on me and rest in peace 소중한 널 내 품속에 꼭 안을게 // I will hold you dear in my arms

#moonbin #moon bin #astro #*ambiv.art #here is my gift to you dear moonbin... to celebrate the joy you brought to your fans both on and off stage #and the millions of hearts that you have touched including mine. thank you .. i hope you sleep well 🌙☁️ #tonight is especially dark because there's a new moon in the sky....i knew this in my bones without even looking outside or checking online #(but i did anyways. and then i looked up that other date and it was the same...💔) #to everyone who sees this... i'm hugging you firmly 💞 please take care. it's lame but drink lots of water it really does help 🥺 #caption is lyrics from sanha's solo Wish ☹️🫶 #*1k #*2k #*3k

[egophiliac]

I love your take on Crowley!

I know that the early, non-Diasomnia stories aren't really your thing, but are you reading the novels at all?

I have been following some of the fan translations and the second book seems intense! Would love to hear what you think about them.

thank you! 💚💚💚 I'm not really sure why you think I don't like the earlier arcs though, I love pretty much all the characters and their storis! (I think 5 and 1 are my favorite of the past episodes, though 6 infected me with the Shroud brainrot something fierce.) I just...ESPECIALLY love diasomnia. :') but there is room in my heart for all of these dweebs! like, who among us is not just as ride-or-die for Adeuce as they are for us.

that said, I don't really follow the other adaptations like the manga (aside from a dip-in just to see the new Yuus) or the novels, though I keep meaning to check them out! I do like seeing the differences between the different forms of media, and how certain things get adapted one way or another! but alas, time/a lack of accessibility stands in our way more often than not. :( someday...someday I will have time to consume all of the media...

#art #twisted wonderland #i have been playing this game since the day it came out #and believe me i could not have stuck with it for the past three and a half years if i was not deep into all of these idiots #not to harp on it but i do think it's funny because i actually. really did not like the diasomnias at first. #it was like a month before their cards/personal stories were added and so we knew almost NOTHING about them #the website descriptions basically make everyone sound awful #so i thought they were kind of mean/boring compared to everyone else! #(except maybe lilia but i was mad at him for the two seconds of 'girl? 👀' hope i had when they were revealed) #but once their cards came out i fell just as hard for them as i did the rest of this silly game #well. sebek took a little longer. but his ketchup incident converted me. #anyway i have so much sentimentality for episode 1 especially #the prologue was like 'oh this is actually a very silly game! oh there is a plot!' #episode 1 was like 'oh i LIKE these characters and what they're doing with them' #(i think ace punching riddle was the moment i decided i REALLY liked this game) (sorry riddle) (you were being a huge dick though) #also...ink drips. ink drips everywhere. #look when i say this game is laser-focused at me and my tastes specifically i am not kidding

[hiddenbarinapocketdimension]

This morning sucked. Woke up at 7 on less than 5 hours of sleep to bake over 50 Eccles cakes. Didn’t have like half my ingredients. Bought more only to realise I still didn’t have them all. Burnt myself on the syrupy filling. Printer died on me as I was trying to get a printing job done. Forgot to have lunch I was so excited. Locked my car key in the boot. Waited an hour in the sun in all black to make sure I didn’t get a parking ticket whilst trying to get said key out. Got stuck in traffic for half an hour only to find I’d just moved under 100 metres. Accidentally had the thermostat cranked up to 40C the whole journey. All of this, just to get to a screening.

Then when I got there….

Shrimp emotions. The atmosphere was incredible. Got there 3 hours early. Immediately bonded with people, and it just felt so warm and exciting. I passed round the Eccles cakes in its little (very large) Antichrist basket. We all counted down with the timer waiting for the episodes to start. The episodes were amazing, and I have to thank @neil-gaiman for making this season come true - it was everything I hoped for and more, and I think that’ll be the case for pretty much everyone. I wouldn’t trade this experience for the world, even if I had to live through this morning 20x over.

Trust me when I say you’re not prepared for season 2. No one is.

Anyways here’s a picture of the cakes in their basket:

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens screening #neil gaiman #like seriously I put like 10 hours into making these cakes so I’m so so happy they went down well. #I hope everyone that was there liked them #its my dream to one day give Neil Gaiman one of my home baked Eccles cakes #anyways #I even got a little poster! I’m gonna treasure it #thank you for making such an amazing thing that has literally shaped my outlook on life and become one of my favourite pieces of media ever #now that I’ve seen eps 1 and 2 I REALLY do not want to Wait to See #mr Neil Gaiman you are insane for this plot #it’s so fun and I never know what to expect #primepremiere #goodomens2 #EDIT: I WAS NOT PREPARED I WAS DEFINITELY NOT PREPARED

[elizabethshaw]

#doctor who #dwedit #dw gifs #my gifs #bill potts #twelfth doctor #them <3 #hello again everyone!! #sorry for being almost completely missing in action recently :( #it's been a pretty busy few months and i've just recently moved country so. not a lot of time for gifmaking and/or tumblr unfortunately! #can't guarantee how much/consistently i'll be around for the foreseeable future but anyway. hope you're all doing well!! :)

[starflungwaddledee]

some rather strong first impressions were made.

required reading for the magical "voice" headcanon and another for starstruck's signature in particular. asked by @trainerbob23 !

#did i need to do a 9 page comic for this... well who knows. i had this scene in mind for a long time and wanted to do it justice! #important moment for both of them. you can see starstruck just generating the bandee shaped mental illness in real time. #and bandee resolving to be her point of contact with waddle dees if the others can't handle it #he is after all; the strongest and the bravest and the best of them. #“what is this signature like” it's like meeting something that has a human face but you can tell it is Not Human. think: uncanny valley #it also took her quite some time to pick up her own voice. she could not speak (popstarian) on her own for a while #she does not mimic anymore though if she can help it because it tends to weird others out and she wants to avoid that!! #it's not like a fun or enjoyable impersonation; it's like a perfect recording on a device. #also i guess this is *finally* the reveal of the 'hospital' mentioned previously that folks noticed and also like... her name 😂 #anyway.... thank you to everyone who voted for starstruck in that poll and has encouraged this insane self indulgence... wow. #never thought i'd get to draw stuff like this and have others look forward to it. i really hope you'll enjoy this!!! #my art #my comics #starstruck dee #bandana waddle dee

[mintjeru]

i'm sorry i put kaveh through the wringer again

open for better quality | no reposts

#kaveh #alhaitham #kavetham #genshin impact #fanart #myart #doodle #content aside. this was unintentionally really good value and perspective practice?? #i abhor foreshortening so it's necessary to practice once in a while #this also felt like i was painting w/ ink which is smth i haven't done in quite a while #anyway i hope everyone's doing well! #it's getting colder so please be sure to take care ^^

[mizunoir]

stargazing ⭐

happy [late] laven week!

#dgm #laven #lavenweek2023 #lavi #allen walker #lavi bookman #d. gray man #I really promised myself I will do at least one artwork for laven week this year #i hope everyone is doing well in the laven fam #wanted to do the happy artwork but i'm not really in a happy place lately #anyways it was supposed to be ready for day 4: night + stars but alas #i am just glad i managed to do anything even though i missed all of the possible deadlines ;; #mizunoir

[prettycoolducks]

Fav father daughter duo ✨️❄️

#art #resident evil 8 #resident evil #re8 #resident evil village #i think they should've done a face reveal for Ethan in the dlc btw #i know we already know what his face looks like but i feel like story wise it would've made sense for him to be able to show his face #in the mold dimension. like. he's already dead. his things over #he has sparkle powers now he's not fucked up anymore #kind of #anyway #ethan winters #rose winters #the dlc felt a bit short but like. its a dlc. so is to be expected #i wish we got more rose content tho. i hope we do get more rose content #im excited for whatever comes next either way though #i like that they let rose be a little gross and scary like her dad. they're both sooo stupid too <3 #i also LOVE that Ethan has sparkle powers in the afterlife.or well. mold. memory. whatever #I'm just imagining all the lords in the mold being like. damn well i guess this isn't so bad. then miranda shows up #and heisenburg is like fuck! and then Ethan shows up and everyone is like fuck!! #like what do they do? kill eachother again? they're already dead #i guess miranda like. killed all the other lords kinda and used them to make the evil duke?? unless i completely misread her notes #I'm gonna go check. then I'm gonna stop typing whole paragraphs in the tags. see ya #art of duck

[reallybadblackoutpoems]

john bull's other island and major barbara (1907) - george bernard shaw

"dont be scraed"

#george bernard shaw #hope everyone is doing well #i am sleepy #also ! #anyone see the hbomberguy video #i have been fucking waiting #for someone to talk about james #holy shit #im so glad people are discussing it #anyway #blackout poem #blackout poetry #author #book #poetry

[overtake]

Max Verstappen Silverstone Interview | Can Max Be Beaten?

#max verstappen #f1 #formula 1 #op #everyone talks about how often max says 'of course' but just has to be up in the numbers as well #also adore that he remembers the exact number #also desperately hope he meant the vacation with martin recently #bc thats such an image #anyway don't think people are usually up bc 80% of f1blr is european but im posting this now anyway #bc hes just too endearing

[turtleblogatlast]

Don’t think I ever quite said what my LGBTQ+ headcanons are for the boys, so these are my current thoughts! Always changing of course but this is what I feel most strongly right now.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt headcanons #rise donnie #rise leo #rise mikey #rise raph #donnie and leo’s sexualities being practically swapped was unintentional but it works way too well #same with mikey and raph tbh it was a happy accident #anyway I kinda hc raph as the type who doesn’t care about physical appearance just if you fight lol #Mikey’s more than happy with friends and family #Donnie is a BIG romantic but he needs time to sus a person out fully before he gets the hots for them #leo meanwhile isn’t keen on romance unless it’s with someone he grows to really really REALLY trust #I could go on and probably will later (knowing me) but it is late and I am tired haha #turtle art tag #curious as to what everyone else headcanons #the only one of these I’ll defend forever is Bi (female-leaning) donnie and trans leo #all the others can change over time but I really like where they’re sitting right now #I hope these are the right flags too because it was kinda hard to find them #went looking for transmasc flag in particular but I couldn’t find a solid agreed upon version 😭 #ngl a big part of why I hc mikey as aro is because of a pun #my phone often misspells aromantic as aromatic and- and you get it- because aromatic herbs and- and Mikey is a chef do YOU GET IT #note that while I hc leo as bisexual (male-leaning) I still think he’s prob closer to demi in that as well just not as far into the spectrum #if that makes sense #headcanons are fun and hard to narrow down at the same time alas #I made this in like an hour can you tell djjdjd #I drew them all from memory so if there’s anything wrong…shhh #and if you’re wondering for April and Splinter #Both are Bisexual (female-leaning) but April is also Panromantic #I almost wanna make Splinter demiromantic too so Big Mama’s betrayal hits just a bit harder

[kondoram]

heheh... litel clown funy 🤡

#buggy #buggy the clown #sir crocodile #dracule mihawk #cross guild #one piece #buggy is my little autistic friend #tho honestly everyone in cross guild is autistic #and gay obv obv #also sorry i forgot what they all wear so im going on memory and/or making shit up sowwy #anyway i love them very much i hope they get to have lots of shenanigans in the future #also i tried doing a new thing with the colours #didnt work #oh well