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littlejuicebox · 1 month

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Plumber’s Crack(fic) / Leaky Pipes

I wrote this for an April Fool’s challenge. You can all thank @vixstarria for influencing me and for this monstrosity coming from that one single tag. AO3 link here.

This is written to be intentionally bad smut. Proceed if you want psychic damage.

Pairing: Astarion x Female Tav

Summary: In a Modern AU, Tav is looking for an expert escort roleplay experience. She gets far more than she expected.

Astarion sighs as he pulls up to a small, ranch style-house with a bunch of flamingo— no, goose… what the fuck?— garden ornaments. He glances at the number over the garage – 401 Pink Clam Street; yes, this is the right address. He pulls down the visor and watches himself in the mirror as he attaches the stupid fucking fake mustache he has to wear on these house calls. Mr. Szarr said no one trusts a plumber without facial hair… what the hell is he on, anyway?

He cannot wait until he is able to quit. This was supposed to be a temporary gig. But now it’s been years, he’s still stuck in this seemingly dead-end job, and truly, everything about it makes his skin crawl. Toilets, clumps of hair in the sink, sticking himself in small, confined spaces… gods, it’s all horrible. He sighs and climbs out of the work van. Time to just… get it over with.

When Tav hears the knock on the door, her eyebrows crinkle. She glances at the clock atop her vanity. It’s eleven in the morning – they’re two hours early. Well, perhaps they’re really in character… don’t plumbers normally come at any other time besides the time they actually say they will? She asked for realistic roleplay this time, unlike what she got from the last crap escort she hired. She’s getting what she’s paying for, at least.

She opens the door and is shocked to see a ridiculously handsome man standing at the entryway. She knew escorts were attractive but– well, she hadn’t exactly expected a greek god in a plumber’s uniform. Turns out, she’s definitely getting what she’s paying for this time around.

“Are you Ms. Tav…” Astarion pauses as he stares down at the word on the clipboard. He lifts an eyebrow. No, that can’t be right.

“Pusey? Yes, that’s me.”

“Can you spell that for me, ma’am?”

Tav blinks. This guy is… really taking the part seriously. “P-U-S-E-Y.”

Astarion nods as he stares down at the form in his hand. Mr. Szarr spelled it wrong on the form, of course. He’s going to have to fix it before she fills out the bottom half at the end. He glances back up to acknowledge the woman; she looks like she’s about to go pose for Playboy at any moment. She’s gorgeous, he has to admit. “I’m Astarion, the plumber. I’m told you need some assistance with your rim holes?”

Tav giggles. It’s time for her to play along. She puts on her best sultry face as she says, “Oh, yes. My rim holes are… definitely in need of your expertise. Please come inside.”

Astarion steps into the house. It’s small, but well-kept and well-decorated. It seems as if she lives entirely alone. “Where is your bathroom, ma’am?”

“I’ll show you,” Tav responds as she begins to head down the hallway. “I apologize, it’s very, very dirty.”

They walk into the bathroom and Astarion looks around. It isn’t dirty at all. Was she making a joke? He puts down his tools, opens the toilet lid, and begins to examine the commode.

“Is it true that… plumbers are good at laying pipe?”

Astarion glances up at the woman. She’s leaning against the doorframe, the picture of seduction. Her silk robe is slipping off her frame; she’s wearing a thin nightie underneath. She really does look like a Playboy centerfold. He swallows. “Yes, ma’am… it’s definitely an important part of the job. Perhaps the most important part. No one wants a plumber that can’t lay pipe.”

“Are you good at laying pipe, Astarion?”

He swallows again and stands. This was… not usually how these things went. “I would consider myself an expert, yes.”

“Then why don’t you show me how good you are at it?”

She’s got him by the coverall strap before he can protest, and her lips crash into his with reckless abandon. She smells wonderful, she’s gorgeous, and she seems to be very into him so it does not take long for Astarion to reciprocate. They’re caught in an embrace in the middle of the bathroom.

Tav breaks the kiss, and when she pulls away, she cannot help but giggle. Astarion’s fake mustache is dangling half off his face.

“Fuck this,” Astarion growls, and he rips the mustache off before eagerly wrapping his hands around the woman. He lifts her onto the bathroom counter and begins hiking up her nightie; he notices she isn’t wearing anything underneath. She’s unclipping his coveralls; they drop down around his ankles.

“Snake my leaky drain, Astarion,” Tav demands, her hands coming to pull his cock from his tighty whities.

He’s honestly surprised by her forwardness. But he does as she asks and quickly sinks himself inside her. He doesn’t last particularly long; he’s a bit embarrassed, but it’s not like he’s ever going to see this woman again. He isn’t so inconsiderate as to leave her without finishing, of course… it just… takes a while. A long while. His hand starts to cramp toward the end.

When the two of them are finished, Astarion runs a hand through his hair and looks around the bathroom. Tav is still on the counter, her hair a mess of tangled curls; one of her fake lashes is falling off. Well… at least they were both wearing fake body hair.

He glances at his wrist watch. Shit– he needs to complete the job and get out of here; he has another assignment later this afternoon. He coughs and tries his best to return to his professional role. “If you… give me a couple minutes to finish up here, I’ll be out of your way, ma’am.”

“Oh… of course.” Tav says and she slips from the counter and tugs her nightgown back down. “Take all the time you need, I’ll be out there with your payment when you’re ready.”

After a couple minutes, Astarion exits the restroom. It took him a bit longer than usual because he had to fill out a new form with the proper spelling of the client’s name. Tav is waiting for him in the kitchen with a smile. “I need a signature from you here, Ms. Pusey.”

Tav obliges and signs the piece of paper. Then she pulls out her wallet. “How much?”

“Five hundred.” Astarion murmurs as he tears off her receipt and hands it to her.

She nods and pulls out six bills. “There’s an extra hundred, for you, of course.”

“Oh. Thank you, ma’am.”

She pulls him into another kiss. “You’re one of the best plumbers I’ve had so far. I might be… contacting your company for your services again sometime.”

Astarion smiles and nods. He sticks the cash in his pocket. He’s not quite sure if he actually wants to be contacted by her or not after this… somewhat embarrassing situation, but he appreciates the sentiment all the same. “I’ll be on my way.”

Tav walks him to the front door. Then she quickly hops in the shower to clean off the evidence of their tryst. When she returns to the kitchen, she sees a text from her landlord.

Ms. Pusey, I forgot to mention this earlier. A plumber should be by this morning, around 11:00 to fix an issue with your toilet we noticed on our biannual walkthrough. His name is Astarion. Please pay him for his services; we will reimburse you once you provide the receipt. Apologies for any inconvenience.

She blinks at the text message. Wait a second…

The doorbell rings. She leaves her phone on the counter. She rips open the front door to reveal… a large, muscular man, dressed in a plumber's uniform.

The man roams his eyes over Tav and smirks mischievously before leaning his arm against the doorframe and staring down at her. His voice is low and suggestive as he speaks. “Hello, Ms. Pusey. My name is Hal Sin. I’m told you have some leaky pipes in need of immediate attention?”

#smut #astarion smut #crack fic #April fools fic #April fools challenge #what is wrong with me #astarion x tav #astarion x female tav #astarion x female oc #Astarion modern au #bg3 modern au

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wyrmwright · 29 days

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Day 1 of the April Fools Challenge.

(Kept From) Holding Court

#aprilfoolschallenge #april fools challenge #april fools challenge 2024 #jesters #royal fool #pere the fool #the king the fool #tktf #ocs #webcomic #original #art prompts #art meme #drawing challenge #art challenge

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dramartist · 1 year

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The FOOL'S Challenge

Artists, one and all, introducing your very own APRIL MONTHLY ART PROMPT! Starting on April 1st, aka April fool's day, I challenge others (and myself) to the foolish task of drawing characters as vines! FOR 30 WHOLE DAYS! You could do your own characters, someone else's, from a show; and you could draw a screenshot, panels, animate, etc. However you'd like!

Disclaimer I am not viable for any finger, arm, wrist, hand, back, brain injuries that come from non-stop drawing and all nighters. Eat, drink, sleep, stretch. You are not actually required to draw every day.

Check the read more for the typed out list, along with links to the vines! And here's a YouTube playlist of all the vines already collected: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLnR0BYbuC5xgBmC8RGQY0JHWrMUDuiM0R

1) Road work ahead? Uh, yeah i sure hope it does.

2) Souls of the Innocent. A bagel. No! Two bagels.

3) Even though I look like a burnt chicken nugget, i still love myself.

4) Hurricane Katrina? More like hurricane tortilla!

5) It is Wednesday my dudes. HOOOOOO

6) So you just gon give me a birthday gift on my birthday... Happy birthday? SLAP.

7) I am the Sand Guardian, guardian of the sand! Poseidon quivers before him!

8) I like chicken strips- Fuck ya chicken strips!

9) It's an avocado! Thanks..

10) Hey I'm lesbian. I thought you were American?

11) Let me see what you have. A knife! No!

12) Boo! Aaa! Stop, I coulda dropped my croissant!

13) *Quacks*. Look it all them chickens!

14) Dad look it's the good kush! It's the dollar store how good could it be.

15) And they were roommates! Oh my god they were roommates.

16) Don't fuck with me! I have the power of god AND anime on my side!

17) Why are you running? Why are you running?!

18) So i was sitting there, barbeque sauce on my tiddies-

19) I'm Jared, I'm 19, and i never learned how to fucking read.

20) Chris is that a weed? No it's a crayon- I'm calling the police!

21) Hello I'm Michael with a B, and I've been scared of insects my whole life-

22) Two bros, chilling in a hot tub, five feet apart cuz they're not gay.

23) So no head? *Throws phone*.

24) Actually Megan, i can't sit anywhere! I have hemorrhoids!

25) Back at it again at Krispy Kreme! *Flips*.

26) Johnny has 19 bottles of dish soap- wait why does Johnny have so many soaps in the first place?!

27) I'm in me mum's car! Vroom vroom.

28) Why the fuck you lying? Mmmm why you always lying?

29) I don't have enough money to buy chicken nuggets. *Sobbing*.

30) Im gonna say it. I don't care that you broke your elbow.

#fools challenge #april fools challenge #april art prompt #april art challenge #monthly art challenge #april fools #artists on tumblr #my art #art challenge #art prompt

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manic-raichu · 30 days

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Oh this episode was just on, and since it's April Fools, I issue a challenge, if you don't know SpongeBob, watch this SpongeBob clip, and tell me the time stamp of how long it took to get ether a laugh, or break from ridiculousness.

youtube

#random me #fandoms #SpongeBob #spongebon squarepants #mermaid man and barnacle boy #funny #april fool's day #April fools #april fools 2024 #April fools challenge #Youtube

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daily-dragon-drawing · 30 days

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#92 - 小龍 (xiǎolóng / little dragon) - A totally ferocious, fiery dragon! Definitely! 🔥🐉🦎

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Happy April Fool's! :3c

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vixstarria · 1 month

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'Erotic misadventures'

Hello, I wrote this for an April Fools challenge, and now it is your problem.

Challenge terms: The challenge is simple - write something spicy that uses the worst possible terms for body parts, sex acts, and so on!

AO3 link

So I've always had this headcanon that Tav and Astarion perform readings of really bad erotica for the group at camp. This is a depiction of one such evening.

All origin characters.

18+, humor, banter. Is this actually smut? I don't know. I hope not.

Content warnings: ...Yes.

Approx. 1,800 words

It was, without a shadow of a doubt, the best piece of fiction they’d ever come across.

Meticulously handwritten in a tidy script, the text filled a sizeable journal. “Her Highness’s Erotic Misadventures” read the title. “Thank you for beta reading, Harpy Quinn”, it said at the bottom of the title page, whatever that meant.

Despite both of them having a professional interest in lewd literature, neither Astarion nor Tav had ever come across this piece before - they doubted it had ever been published. They doubted it could ever be published, for that matter. However, it must have gone through many hands privately - on flipping through the journal it was discovered that the end contained a multitude of little gushing reviews in other people’s writing.

The author must have been one strange individual, with even weirder friends. How embarrassing.

The gang had called it a day and were gathered around the campfire. Astarion and Tav had been taking turns reading from the manuscript, to their companions’ amusement (and, in Gale’s case, vexation).

Despite being seasoned experts in the genre, Wyll and Shadowheart were visibly perturbed (albeit also intrigued) by the piece. Karlach hung on to every word, and even Lae’zel had stopped tending to her weapons to listen to the strange tale spun by the anonymous author. Volo, whose unwarranted presence continued to be tolerated, although no one could quite pinpoint why, was silent, furiously scribbling notes in his own journal. And as for Gale, well…

“This is deplorable,” said Gale, weary disappointment and disdain in his voice. “The only reason I am still here is because none of you can be trusted with the pot.”

Astarion ignored him and continued to pace around the fire, reading aloud from the journal.

As the title suggested, the story depicted a series of obscene misfortunes which had befallen a hapless princess and her loyal knight. After several chapters of delving into the princess’s tragic and salacious backstory in (frankly bewildering) detail, the narrative had at last moved forward to a scene in which the princess’s knight came to her rescue after she had been kidnapped and taken away to a cave by a dragon. The knight faced the said dragon (who had then taken a dragonborn form for some reason) and its two harpy henchwomen.

“‘Its weak spot is its bussy’, the princess cried out from the cave,” read Astarion. “What in the hells is a ‘bussy’..?” he asked, lifting his head to seek counsel from his companions.

Everyone around the fire just shook their heads, equally perplexed.

“Hmm… Well, it seems our hero doesn’t know that word either...” Astarion continued reading.

“‘Puzzled, the paladin took a shot in the dark, cramming her manhood-’ Wait, what? I could have sworn...” Astarion shuffled through the pages. “…Oh she’s got both sets. How convenient… Anyway. …‘Cramming her manhood into the dragonborn’s meatgrinder’.” Astarion frowned again, sitting down next to Karlach.

“Is the ‘meatgrinder’ the dragonborn’s mouth, or..?” asked Shadowheart.

“I… think so? There’s not many contextual clues here, it just says that the ‘meatgrinder swirled around her pork sword, stunning her and nearly making her forsake her oath of propriety’.”

“Well keep going, we’ll figure it out,” Karlach said, impatiently.

“The two harpies swarmed the stunned paladin. A hand deftly shed the paladin’s breastplate, exposing her pearls, whilst another grabbed her by the neck, clawed fingers shredding the remnants of her clothing, as two hands groped and teased her milkbags. She felt a hand creep up the back of her thigh while another hand pulled on her hair, as another crept to her moistening oyster-” Astarion stopped, with an exasperated sigh. “How many hands do these bloody things have?! I’m losing focus.”

“And the mention of pearls…” Wyll said, thoughtfully. “It’s peculiar, you would think a pearl would be inside the… never mind”.

“Shadowheart, could you and Tav assist us with a visual, perchance,” asked Astarion. “I can’t be the only one who can’t keep track.”

“Perhaps I could also be of assis-” started Wyll.

“Perhaps you could sit right back down,” Astarion warned with a glower. “I'll step in if needed. Where was I..? Ah yes, the err… the milkbags. So there’s definitely two hands there.”

Both Tav and Shadowheart giggled as Shadowheart stood to join Tav by the fire and reached around Tav to lightly place her hands over the other woman’s breasts.

“Nice,” said Karlach.

“The harpy pinched her pearls, and pulled her into a deep, ravishing kiss,” Astarion read, looking up expectantly at Tav and Shadowheart.

“Uh… That is not in the book, soldier,” said Karlach, reading over Astarion’s shoulder.

“Spoilsport,” muttered Astarion. “I was just trying to set the mood before moving forward - the author’s pace is almost too relentless even for me. But fine.”

Astarion cleared his throat and continued.

“Then one of the harpies used her hands to pry open the paladin’s clam.” He looked up again. “Well come on, Shadowheart, pry open Tav’s clam.”

Shadowheart simply laughed and returned to her spot across the fire.

“If you’re not sure how - we could show you later tonight, if you like,” Astarion called out after her.

“I’m sure I could give you some pointers on dealing with clams, Astarion,” retorted Shadowheart.

“Is that so..?” he purred. “Interesting… What about you, Karlach, are you adept with clams?”

“You know I haven’t had any clams in a decade, fangs!” Karlach groaned. “But before that… They used to just fling themselves at me, already opened, yeah.”

“Fascinating. Lae’zel?”

“There are a number of women who have survived bedding me,” the githyanki responded, deadpan.

“I am… in equal parts concerned and aroused at the thought,” Astarion mulled over her words.

“I wish anyone could survive bedding me,” grumbled Karlach.

“There there, darling…” Astarion reached out to carefully pat her on a horn. “Now we all know Gale doesn’t know the first thing about clams…”

“I’ll have you know, in my ethereal relations with my goddess, our connection was so profound that not only have I experienced her ‘clam’, I have interconnected with it on such a sublime and intimate level, been woven so deeply into it to myself have become part of the clam.”

Gale’s outburst failed to have the effect he had desired, as the group struggled to contain themselves, wheezing and huffing for air.

“Thank you, Gale, I don’t believe I’ll be able to get that image out of my mind anytime soon,” Astarion continued, trying to maintain his composure. “Wyll..? How fare you with prying clams open?”

“Well…” The warlock began, with a smile. “I find, that the best way to go about it is to allow the clam to open of its own accord, from heat. From it getting sufficiently… steamy, if I may. I would never simply invade one with my blade.”

Astarion was about to say something but just chortled instead.

“Wyll, you rapscallion, every time I think I have you figured out-”

“What happens next with the harpies?” Came an impatient call from Lae’zel.

“Yes, give me that, you’re taking too long,” said Tav, snatching the journal back from Astarion. She continued to pace around the fire as she recited:

“The dragonborn stood before the browbeaten paladin, reveling in her anguish. Even had the harpies not had a firm grasp on the paladin and her unmentionables, she would not have known how to approach the dragonborn – the loathsome creature was covered in impenetrable scales. Its mouth sported rows upon rows of sharp teeth – the only reason it allowed the paladin’s mutton machete out unscathed must have been because it had worse yet torments in mind for it.

The creature turned its back on the paladin, to roar tauntingly at the princess somewhere in the cave.

‘Behold, as I turn your valiant saviour into naught but a pathetic cumdumpster!’

As it turned its back, the paladin glimpsed a narrow, pink orifice beneath its tail.”

Karlach and Wyll gasped in unison.

“The bussy!” Lae’zel hissed in a hushed whisper.

“The paladin drew on the last of her divine power to throw the harpies off, smiting them unconscious, and plunged her hand into the dragonborn’s puckered hole.”

“I am going to be sick,” moaned Gale.

“The dragonborn cackled and flexed their beef ring, tightening its grasp on the paladin’s hand. The paladin reeled in horror, as the dragonborn’s poop chute seemed to suck the paladin’s hand further in, like fleshy quicksand, whilst threatening to snap her wrist.”

A tear of anguish slid down Gale’s cheek.

“It cannot be! Was the bussy a trap?!” came an outcry from Lae’zel.

“No! It could not end this way. Her entire life and all her training had been preparing her for this,” Tav read. “What in the hells, really?” she muttered, before continuing. “In that moment, she knew that the only way out - was through. The paladin took a deep breath and PLUNGED her arm deeper into the dragonborn’s vile cavity,” Tav exclaimed, throwing her own fist in the the air, to the sound of Astarion’s uncontrollable giggling and everyone else’s gasps.

“The dragonborn yelped and tried to expel the paladin’s arm from their pulsating dirtbox, to no avail. The paladin was now elbow deep in the mud dungeon. The two continued to wrestle, the paladin’s arm pumping deeper and deeper into the dragonborn’s dank portal.”

“I fear I may need to tap out soon,” warned Wyll.

“Weakling!” Lae’zel and Shadowheart said in unison, before glaring at one another.

No one, including Karlach herself, could tell whether she was laughing or crying.

“At last, the dragonborn seemed to accept its fate, quivering and taking the paladin’s arm nearly shoulder-deep. The creature grunted and groaned, before stilling, only to unleash an earth-shaking roar, finally forcefully expunging the paladin’s arm in a spray of gooey, milky spunk, as it collapsed on the ground, convulsing, clearly too incapacitated to be of any further threat.”

“Supper is ready,” wept Gale.

“Shall I take over while you eat?” Astarion asked, to Gale’s immediate renewed protestation.

“That’s alright, I think we should take some mercy on Gale and pause here for the day,” said Tav. “Although let me peek ahead, perhaps it’s tame enough.” She took the journal and flipped forward a few pages. “Oh my…” came a surprised murmur from Tav. “You’ll never guess what happens to the princess and her knight… This may be a problem if we want to continue to visualise this masterpiece properly.”

“Oh? Dare I ask..?” Astarion was giddy with anticipation.

“Well… There are now… Five… Six… No, seven! Seven dwarves, who have appeared in the cave.”

“Goodness gracious,” lamented Astarion. “We will never keep track of all the body parts… Perhaps if Withers steps in to help..? Would you prefer to be the princess or the knight, darling? You can choose, I’ll take the other role.”

“I am going to use that journal for kindling tomorrow,” said Gale.

“NO!” came a collective shout from the rest of the group.

~~~~~

Sorry about the psychic damage, come check out my other work if you dare.

~~~~~

Tagging the usual plus some people who I think might also be doing / were interested in this:

@littleenglishfangirl @something-pithy @darlingxdragon @tallymonster @tragedybunny @spunky-89 @acourtofpenandpaper @yoonshope @lariatbunny @whiskeyskin @spacebarbarianweird @brabblesblog @littlejuicebox @icybluepenguin @snowfolly @pursuitseternal @comatosebunny09 @kittenintheden @bardic-inspo @tavyliasin

#BG3AprilFoolishness #bg3 #bg3 fanfiction #fanfic challenge #april fools #writing challenge #baldur's gate 3 #comedy smut #astarion #tav #karlach #gale #shadowheart #lae'zel #wyll #smut

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1-nexomon-a-day · 30 days

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Hey guys, i decided i dont like Nexomon anymore, this is now a Yokai watch-a-day-blog lmao

Jibanyan!

#art #fanart #doodle #jibanyan #yokai watch #yo kai watch #digital art #art challenge #ibispaint art #this is obviously an april fools joke btw #4/1/24 #april fools

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tavyliasin · 2 months

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Open FanFic Event! April Foolishness - LINK UPDATED

Welcome to a brand new open Baldur's Gate 3 challenge for writers who are over 18! The link has been updated and should now work, sorry!

The challenge is simple - write something spicy that uses the worst possible terms for body parts, sex acts, and so on!

This could be short scenarios, dialogue only pieces, short fics, long fics - whatever strikes your fancy! You are welcome to submit as many pieces as you'd like and to have fun with it.

Your works can be purely comedy based, or they could try to make something genuinely spicy and erotic but still using terrible terms at least once.

Have fun with it! If anyone would like to help me concoct a list or random generator of terrible smut words, please do get in touch by email, Twitter, Tumblr, or Discord~

ALL WORKS SUBMITTED WILL BE HIDDEN UNTIL 1st APRIL!

Please make sure everything is tagged appropriately with any CWs~ More Details Follow!

Examples of Awkward Words And Phrases for Smut

You might want to use modern euphemisms and slang, or you could find it more fun to dig back into historical terms. This article, for example, has a lot of modern slang for "penis" which would be wonderfully dreadful in any smut-writing: Thought Catalogue - Words for Penis This one, whilst I'm not fond of the gendered headings for genitalia types, has some interesting mixes of historical terms: Slate - Historical Terms for Genitalia Unfortunately, the linked source of the terms and timeline of them in this article is no longer available

If you have any lists and examples to help, please send them to me! Even better, if you'd like to help by making a randomiser that people could use to give them terms and phrases from a list we input that would be incredible~ Please get in touch!

More Details

Honestly as I type this I'm a little tired so I'll come back and add to the post at a later date if needed, and add in Q&As if anyone has anything to ask about the event!

Deadline - 1st April 2024, to release everything on April Fool's Day

Suggested tag #BG3AprilFoolishness

(If anyone else is using that, my apologies, I'll edit something else)

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 fanfiction #fanfic #fanfic challenge #april fools #BG3AprilFoolishness #creative challenge #smut but make it comedy #or comedy but make it hot #bring all your clams and tallywhackers

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mrsjellymunson · 15 days

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Turning P!nk

Written for the @steddiemicrofic April prompt ‘Fool’

WC: 454 | Rating: T | CW: none | tags: and then they were roommates, friends to lovers, idiots in love, love confession (sort of), ficlet based on song lyrics

“So if you're too school for cool,

And you're treated like a fool-

Treated like a fool!”

Eddie watches as Steve, in his own world, folds laundry, singing along with one of his favourite tracks. He’s a little flat in places, probably because he’s wearing headphones, but he has a surprisingly nice singing voice, and is even doing the harmonies.

He’s bending his knees and wiggling his shoulders to the beat, but it’s when he starts swinging his hips in time that Eddie nearly loses it.

He’s the fool if he thinks he can carry on like this, sharing an apartment with his friend who he’s developed a massive crush on.

If only there was a way to tell him that didn’t involve, y’know, actually coming out and saying it…

A few weeks later Steve’s come to watch Corroded Coffin at The Hideout. He notices Eddie’s antsier than usual, hands running through and frizzing his hair, a crease between his eyebrows that Steve’s doesn’t often see. Unusually for him, he’s repeatedly checking in with the rest of the band, who are valiantly trying to chill him out, reassuring him that everything will be fine.

The gig goes really well, Eddie looking fantastic on the stage and absolutely killing it. Steve wonders whether he’ll ever get used to that. Seeing Eddie like this always makes him… feel things, things he hasn’t yet allowed himself to properly process.

Steve’s in the crowd, as usual hanging towards the back in his yellow polo so he can avoid the disparaging stares of some of the other patrons and the flailing limbs of the mosh pit.

He’s nodding his head and swaying a little, but he never lets go like he does at home.

They finish their standard set, and along with the rest of the crowd Steve claps and cheers and then starts to move away from the stage.

But to everyone’s surprise they start playing something else, Steve hearing the chords of a song he recognises.

Of course, the style is very different. It’s relentless, driving guitars and Gareth’s thumping drums, but it’s so familiar. And when Eddie starts singing, Steve can’t believe it.

“Right, right, turn off the lights,

We’re gonna lose our minds tonight,

What's the dealio?”

The band gives it their all, but Eddie especially. He’s scanning the crowd, seeking Steve, and when he sees him, laughing and dancing in the middle of the floor and smiling widely because it’s his favourite song, he smiles right back.

And at the end, where they’ve tweaked it so it’s literally just Eddie’s voice on the final two words, he sings them straight at Steve.

“Just come on and come on and, raise your glass,

For me…”

Tags: @joejoequinnquinn @jamdoughnutmagician @curlyjoequinn @madaboutmunson @airen256 @sunshinepeachx

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oh-stars · 30 days

Text

Repeat

wc: 454 | cw: N/A | m rating | for @steddiemicrofic | Prompt: "fool"

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“Is there a reason this song is on repeat?”

Eddie looks up, eyes dry and irritated, from his notebook. Steve’s leaning against the kitchen counter, a hand on his hip and the other keeping him balanced along the counter top. He’s haloed by the kitchen light, backlit and angelic in all his glory. When did he get home? How long has he been here to notice the songs on repeat and Eddie hadn’t noticed his arrival? How long has he been working?

“It’s the perfect work song,” Eddie says as he tucks his pen into his notebook and slides off the couch. His body protests, skin stretching to its limits and joints popping with the new movement. He should probably stretch more, do his physical therapy exercises from time to time, but he can’t be bothered.

Steve tilts his chin up as Eddie walks closer, eyes all warm and his smirk so tempting, Eddie can’t help but kiss it off his face.

Their lips meet as the song comes to a crescendo, a tender kiss that breathes life into Eddie’s aching body. “Missed you,” Eddie mumbles as he kisses along Steve’s jaw.

His hands are so big on Eddie’s waist, squeezing as his fingertips slip under Eddie’s tank. “Missed you too. Surprised you weren’t waiting on the porch for me,” Steve says, his voice rich in its lower register.

Eddie’s face is hot from Steve and his embarrassment, he had meant to. He had wanted to. Inspiration struck and… Eddie follows when it calls. He thought he set a timer, but the repetitive song and his focus must have tuned it out.

The song starts from the top. Eddie hums with it, whispering the lyrics in Steve’s ear as he wraps his arms around his neck. “There's perfect harmony in the rising and the falling of the sea.” His lips brush the shell of Steve’s ear as he nips at his earlobe.

Steve moans, hands no longer squeezing as he pulls Eddie toward their bedroom. “Eds,” he gasps when Eddie sucks in the spot behind his ear, pressing their bodies closer together.

They tumble into their room and onto the bed without separating, too engrossed in one another to care.

Eddie pulls away to slip off their shirts as the chorus kicks on, louder now that they’re near the stereo. He lets himself get into it, standing on the bed as he sings with his chest, “Leaving nothing, nothing more to say, all the fools sailed away.” As the song wraps up, Eddie pops out the tape and puts on their sex mixtape.

When he turns around, Steve’s naked and lounging against their pillows.

And well. He’d be a fool to leave him waiting.

thank you @lady-lostmind for betaing!

Ao3 Link

#ohstars fic #steve harrington #steddie #eddie munson #stranger things #steddie fic #ohstars posting challenge #steddie microfic #april challenge #fool #fade to black

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