#because the act itself was not something he would ever view as mercy for the impact it had on him

[keikoayano]

I could be totally wrong with the instrument here but I’m having thoughts

In Just a Man immediately after Odysseus says “how could I hurt you?” the next couple notes that play sound like a trumpet to me - which leads me down the rabbit hole of “this is Odysseus being ruthless in order to protect his family and kingdom by killing an actual baby” and the whole Poseidon is represented by a trumpet and his theme of ruthlessness is mercy whICH JUST????????? THERE IS SO MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THAT

#epic the musical #personal #genuinely am not sure if that’s a trumpet it could be Ody’s neon guitar that plays when he’s being emotional/vulnerable? #but it sounds like a trumpet to me and I can’t stop thinking about what if it IS a trumpet and how that could relate Odysseus and his action #to Poseidon and ruthlessness being mercy #because that act is NOT a mercy to Odysseus it is something that actively haunts him with guilt #but it is ruthlessness being mercy to baby #Astyanax because it was a quick death that the baby will not suffer for #and that quick death COULD be viewed as Odysseus being merciful to himself in a twisted way as well #because the act itself was not something he would ever view as mercy for the impact it had on him #but HOW he decided to do it can be seen as mercy for both him and little Astyanax due to the lack of suffering #during the actual death #all Odysseus had to do was drop him and all Astyanax had to do was…… fall #by NO MEANS does that make it any easier of an act for him to do which is made very clear in Just a Man and later songs where he speaks of #his guilt for all that he has done in his life #but it is still ruthlessness AND mercy based on how you view the actions and the thought process and influence of those actions #so if that IS a trumpet or is another instrument that is meant to sound like a trumpet #then that’s fascinating to connect that act to Poseidon so early on before we ever hear the word ruthless in the music at all #although if it’s Ody’s guitar then that’s also brilliant bc the whole song is him being vulnerable and those few notes stand out #so strongly to me because it is near silent when they play

[ghostdrinkssoup]

something I find really interesting about hannibal’s character is how he uses people’s expectations and ingrained assumptions to hide himself. no one suspects he’s a serial killer because he doesn’t present as one. he’s elegant and refined and isn’t cruel to animals. he’s highly sophisticated, a polyglot and has a deep admiration for beauty and life. he appreciates saving lives just as much as he appreciates ending them. in fact, this particular aspect of his character is partly why it takes will the entirety of s1 to accept hannibal’s true nature. will saw hannibal save abigail and accompany her to the hospital in apéritif and he also saw hannibal save a man’s life by performing emergency surgery and taking over the operation at the end of sorbet.

this moment in particular is interesting because of how it’s framed to make hannibal look almost godly from will’s point of view:

1) hannibal is positioned immediately higher than will due to being in the ambulance, meaning will is looking up at hannibal, while hannibal is looking down on him

2) hannibal is standing under a bright light as he works to save this guy’s life, while will is standing in almost complete darkness

3) the usual orchestral, classical music is playing in the background, emphasising the apparent “holiness” of the act and framing hannibal as some sort of saviour

the impact of this scene is even more potent when considering the context of the rest of the episode, since will has already stated that the ripper is not the type to save people or enact mercy on anyone. his style of murders doesn’t suggest this characteristic whatsoever, and although will’s assessment is correct, hannibal’s personality and overall demeanour doesn’t match what we’d imagine a person like that might look like. I think will is confronted by this as well, because even if hannibal’s surgical skill means he matches the ripper’s profile (which makes him a valid suspect) his actions contradict will’s image of the ripper, while simultaneously affirming it:

it’s difficult to reconcile these facets of hannibal’s character. it’s inherently contradictory and defies our cultural expectations. nonetheless, hannibal’s inclination to save people is sometimes more insidious than his murders. he doesn’t save people out of altruism, he does it because he thinks he’s superior and enjoys deciding outcomes. he doesn’t view himself as insane, he views himself as god. this is most aptly explored in takiawase, through the acupuncturist/beekeeper killer. here we see a murderer who confesses that she killed a man to quiet his mind, and tells jack that it’s beautiful that she managed to protect him and her other patients. this is one side of hannibal’s character, the one who’s a doctor and therapist and sees death as a cure from disease, even if the ‘disease’ itself is literally just discourtesy. it’s ultimately an act of power.

and yet in this same episode he flips a coin and saves bella on a whim. this of course is framed to others as an act of mercy, however the reality is he took bella’s power away in an act disguised as kindness. once again, he hides in plain sight. this is the other side of his character, and it’s just as deadly.

it’s still about power.

but we don’t associate acts of mercy with monstrosity. when hannibal comforts abigail in trou normand we question whether he’s as bad as we think, because what negative connotations are tied to paternal tenderness? we miss that hannibal is fostering dependency, that he literally looks dead in the eyes as he holds her, and that he blatantly just told us that he’s using abigail to manipulate will:

hannibal often does this actually. he either directly says what he’s doing or suggests that he’s the culprit (often through cannibal puns, as we know) but no one ever interprets him correctly because doing so would contradict the image he’s carefully constructed for himself. it would cause too much dissonance.

and what’s fascinating is that on a subtextual level this is largely what the show is about. the story is an exploration of societal roles and the struggle to fit into stiff categorisation and expectations. will parallels hannibal in this regard because he’s desperately trying to repress his identity by taking on certain roles. and the audience is lured by this persona the same way the characters are lured by hannibal because will defies our understanding of certain tropes. on a genre level, will assumes the detective archetype, meaning we are primed to think he’s inherently good. when we see him say he wants to save people we believe him, even though he often only does so to prove to himself that he’s a good person. will is indeed righteous, a characteristic we often view positively, however he’s violent, wrathful and actively enjoys murder due to how powerful it makes him feel. he’s not dissimilar to hannibal, we just don’t see this straight away because doing so would disrupt our understanding of good and evil.

will hides the same way hannibal does, except will hides from us as well

#ghostie once again goes on a tangent #but it’s so !! I really love how the show fucks with everyone #and uses our expectations to do it #even on a narrative/genre level #the key to unveiling it is letting that conditioning and urge to categorise everything go #also wow I’m back to writing meta hello there #nbc hannibal #hannibal #will graham #hannigram #hannibal meta #ghost speaks

[thedarkdisgrace]

The thread from twitter I did about my interpretations on Verlaine, rereading this some parts might sounds a little redundant but i think it gets the point across.

People have a lot of opinions on Verlaine but I think this one line in particular goes hard & does alot to explain his view of humanity as well as the conversation a the end of SB.

“Sometimes creating is far more sinister than killing.”

I think Verlaine views his creation as an ‘act of humanity’. But to normal people, an act of humanity means kindness, right? Showing compassion or empathy. But from Verlaine’s POV it is the *opposite* of that. Humanity is not kind nor compassionate. It’s dark, twisted, & selfish.

Humanity to Verlaine is *only* the darkest and worst parts of human nature because that’s all he ever knew. He was created with the sole purpose of being controlled & used to kill & destroy. That was his entire world until Rimbaud rescued him & gave him some control for the first time.

Verlaine despises how he was created, that he was created in the first place. In his mind, humans used their capacity to create to make something that only serves to destroy & also, cruelly, allowed that creation to suffer all alone. They let him suffer and never treated him as a human, just a tool. A weapon. So he came to resent humans & humanity itself.

To Verlaine, humanity represents everything sinister in the world. Not any of the good that, say, Chuuya sees. Rimbaud was an exception to this, however, & I believe it’s why Verlaine pushed Rimbaud away. Because his existence & treatment of Verlaine was challenging this world view. Then when Rimbaud sides against him when he wanted to take Chuuya to safety, that was the confirmation Verlaine needed that Rimbaud was just like the rest. Even if Verlaine knew deep down that wasn’t really true.

Humanity disgusts him because of the way he was created & his lack of real purpose. He couldn’t find a reason he *should* exist, given that the original purpose of his creation was sinister. Because of that I think he believes no good can come from humanity so he thinks of them as monsters.

It’s why he believes creating is more sinister than killing. Humanity created him out of selfishness & with no compassion what so ever. He resents his very existence & his loneliness. He believes someone would have to be sinister to create Verlaine as he is, completely alone, no real purpose, only to be used by others.

So he thinks of the people who made him (& by extension Chuuya) as the worst monsters, more monstrous than he could ever be. It’s this dark view of humanity that I believe leads to Verlaine to thinking of killing as a thrill to him & also a tool.

Nothing about humanity is salvageable to him, at least not until the end of SB. In his own words he’s “the soul of a man who couldn’t trust the world or its people like you do.” As he says to Chuuya at the end of the book when he comes to realize, through Chuuya, his view may be wrong/incomplete.

Verlaine was incapable of trusting that humans could be more, that they were more than their darkest parts. He wasn’t able to trust that darkness was only a singular part of humanity & that the good wasn’t only a mask they would hide their darkness with. Though some do hide behind masks of kindness, it’s not all of humanity. Genuine people do exist. Caring people do exist.

But to Verlaine, killing humans isn’t a monstrous act. It’s almost an act of mercy or even a punishment. But Verlaine is also just desperately lonely because of his loathing of humanity. How he separates himself from it. That’s why when he learns of Chuuya, someone that existed that he felt might share his pain & might actually understand his POV, all he wants to do is protect him. To bring him to his side so he doesn’t have to be so lonely anymore & he can still serve humanity the “justice” for lack of a better word he thinks they deserve through killing.

He wanted to protect Chuuya from humanity itself because to him, humanity is the villain. He believed everyone around Chuuya was only using him because to him that’s all humans do. Aside Rimbaud, who he ended up fighting, he never had anyone to show him other things humanity has to offer

To him all humans do is use & abused & are selfish & twisted. That’s why Verlaine doesn’t even think twice about killing the flags, for example. Surely they were just using Chuuya like everyone else. Humans are the monsters, not him & Chuuya, despite the purposes of their creation.

Now, in the end, Chuuya & Verlaine come to understand more of each others POVs. That’s why Verlaine taught Chuuya how to defeat him. Because even while Verlaine still doesn’t quite believe humanity has value, he sees Chuuya’s conviction in his belief that humanity *is*valuable. People can be worth it.

Chuuya knows humanity is more complex than Verlaine believes & despite the darkness that exists there *is* light too. Humans are more than their worst sides. Chuuya has always believed people were worth living for, that they were worth suffering for.

But he also knows he could have easily gone down the dark path Verlaine did. As Chuuya says “You rolled the dice and lost. It was a stroke of bad luck, and you rolled a one. But the pips came out different when I rolled. I was blessed with wonderful friends. That’s all.”

Verlaine, in the end, I believe, *wants* to believe in what Chuuya believes about the world. As Chuuya says to him:

“Besides, what you have isn’t just hatred. You don’t actually despise the world. That’s why you showed me that memory. You taught me how to defeat Guivre.”

Chuuya is his opposite essentially. Chuuya, even while suffering at the hand of the coldness and cruelty that humanity is capable of, can still see the good and light of human nature. Chuuya has always known there is more to humanity than cruelty & Verlaine never was able to see that before.

Chuuya contributes this essentially to always having friends, people he cared about around him. But Chuuya does *understand* why Verlaine is the way he is. Why Verlaine thinks the way he does & Chuuya, being who he is, essentially forgives him in the end. It’s why he’s able to have that “final” conversation with him.

Humanity, what it *means* to be human, is really the entire theme of Storm Bringer & everyone showcases us a different perspective of this. Chuuya, Adam & Verlaine (Dazai somewhat as well) as show us different aspects of humanity and ones struggles with it. Verlaine’s view is dark. It showcases the impact a *lack* of humanity being shown to others can have on us.

I am also not saying anything Verlaine did was alright or justifying what he did because of his broken view on life. What he tried to do by killing everyone Chuuya knew was wrong. But he *does care* about Chuuya. But he couldn’t express that in any healthy way. He didn’t know how, didn’t know it was wrong in the first place.

Anyway, this is just my interpretation of Verlaine as a character and everyone can have their own interpretations! These are just my thoughts. I hope they made sense, I’m not super sure I was able to articulate everything well. I think I I kinda rambled but oh well.

#bsd spoilers #bsd analysis #bsd stormbringer #paul verlaine #chuuya #bsd verlaine #chuuya nakahara #dazai #bsd #soukoku

[starflungwaddledee]

(This ask got so long I had to split it into 4 parts, sorry about that!)I love your AUs so MUCH, oh my GOD!! Bandee realizing that the world is Wrong because no good, just world would let Kirby be so, so miserable... the heartbreak of him being powerless to stop Galacta poisoning Kirby's worldview, because to directly interfere is to doom them all... the way that he does everything in his power to support Kirby and tries to protect his heart (1/4)

haha... haha...! 😅 *nervously checks under my desk for secret cameras*

but in all seriousness, thank you so much for enjoying the work and reading it with such dedication and perception!! ngl i am genuinely curious who this is tbh!

all your kind words mean a lot, i'm so happy to know the emotion comes over well in my comics work!!

rest under the cut just due to length. just general excitement and responses to the content of the asks, some minor mentions of lying/psychological manipulation.

i'm also super thrilled that you see and understand the bandee-centric vision. seeing this written out so transparently by someone else as though it was straight from my own hand was a really fun experience!! he is a loyal and heroic little dude... he loves kirby so much! save an entire timeline for his best friend? he WILL do it, no matter what!!

it does drive bandee nuts and hurts him so bad not to be able to talk about any of this with kirby directly, but galacta knight is paying such extremely close attention to kirby at that point that if bandee tried any harder than he did during that café scene, it would definitely get back to him and the jig would be up.

and indeed, kirby is directly parroting stuff galacta knight has said, word for word. it's hard to tell but some of kirby's dialogue is even in a tweaked colour (vibrant galacta knight hot pink, rather than the warmer kirby pink) to help make that clear. it's like... not what kirby would ever say or even really think, which is what makes it so sinister.

galacta knight is, as you said, poisoning kirby's worldview; and with it, kirby's legacy itself. by the time star allies occurs and they are trying to combat the effects of the jamba hearts, the citizens of dream land are not pleased when the great hero kirby shows up to help them. they're terrified

simultaneously, as you correctly pointed out, he's also damaging kirby's view of bandee. not directly bad mouthing him or anything, because he figured out that didn't work early on, but galacta knight himself certainly thinks that bandee is weak and expendable, so it's easy for him to feed that fear in kirby. especially because kirby has lost so many other friends to 'dark matter' at this point

especially because bandee is indeed all kirby has left

you absolutely hit the nail on the head with regards to the end of that café scene. it was incredibly intentional phrasing on galacta knight's behalf. he didn't even bother telling that to bandee who is- at this point- the last waddle dee in dream land. just "they're invading."

it's not even necessarily untrue; they were coming to take the waddle dees! but galacta knight can absolutely rationalise many things to kirby, at this point, by saying it puts bandee in particular at risk. he can and does weaponise their friendship, especially in the later stages of the au

we cannot afford to delay when faced with threats, kirby, not everybody is strong like you. mercy could get someone killed. make sure you train so, so hard, kirby, to protect the people you care about. make sure you make him train hard, so he isn't viewed as the vulnerable target he is.

make sure you act decisively to keep him safe.

you can ask questions later.

and if something were to 'accidentally' happen to bandee... well that would probably just confirm everything galacta knight had been saying all along.

wouldn't it?

#asks #awtdy au #cw angst #up until the another dimension fight with meta knight #where galacta knight learns he *cares* about bandee #galacta knight indeed thinks the most useful thing bandee can do is die dramatically and push kirby over the edge #*after* that realisation he is suddenly much more useful. of course.

[yanderes-galore]

A1 vampire Albert Wesker or Sergei Vladimir?

I feel like Wesker works. We're doing vampires again ^^;

Prompt Found Here

Yandere! Vampire! Albert Wesker Prompt A-1

(Halloween Event - Hunt)

Pairing: Romantic

A-1: "I want to know how you'll taste between my teeth."

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Stalking, Hunting, Vampires, Blood, Blood drinking, Descriptions of eating people, Threats of breaking bones/threats in general, Sadism, Implied kidnapping/death, Deception, Violence, Choking in one part.

"You must be aware I'm stronger than you, yes?"

A voice taunts you, the mouth who uttered it licks their fangs hungrily. Ghoulish eyes track their prey through tinted sunglasses as you run. Many of his prey ran like this, it was a hunt like all the rest.

Every movement he made towards you was calculated. Taunting you while he stalked you in the night. He plays the act of human well, yet his movements while hunting were far from human.

"I could break each of your bones like a twig. What's stopping me from squeezing your ribcage until your organs give out?"

The sound of your ragged breath gave away your position. Just when you thought you were safe, that familiar trenchcoat would come into view. Then you're right back to square one again.

"Oh to drain your blood into a bucket to savour the taste sounds delightful."

He laughs in the darkness, continuing his brisk pace.

"Your fear will only make my dinner taste better."

He turns a corner just in time to see you run another one. He grins, crossing his arms while walking. He didn't have to try too hard for this.

"Maybe I'll even play around with you for a bit. Get you all worked up to sweeten the taste of you... the choice can be yours."

He's fast, toying with you. He keeps a certain distance away from you to give you the illusion of escape. When in reality, he could catch you right then and there.

"Will you really make me wait like this? You're so cute... although you should know you're teasing a hungry beast."

He's drooling at the mouth, desperate for his next meal. He loves playing with you, yet it only makes him hungrier.

"I want to know how you'll taste between my teeth."

The vampire sighs, closing the distance ever so slightly. He was getting impatient. He's been watching you for a long time now. His mouth prepares itself to catch you and sink into your neck, fantasizing about how you'd taste.

It would be so wonderful if he littered your weaker body in bites, your blood flowing into his mouth and blessing him with a new taste. A bitter taste of fear... but a sweet taste of pleasure. Such a concoction is addictive to vampires.

He may keep you around if you're good enough to his tastes. If you manage to entertain him on a game of chase... and charm his taste buds, you've won a place beside him. Many pets have come before you...

He wants you to prove you deserve to join their ranks.

"If you come to me now, dear... I promise I'll give you luxury."

His words are coated in a sugary trap. Come too close to taste it... and you'll be either hooked or dead. Wesker, the name he went by, was a monster that cloaks himself in the night. Would he really be merciful to prey like you?

He didn't want to let you go after he drank from you. He may not even give you luxury. However, because you have something he craves, he's willing to do every lie in the book to coax you.

He treats you like a frightened animal once he catches you, dashing towards you with inhuman speed before picking you up by your neck. You choke on his grip and squeal when he pushes you against the wall. Those orange eyes are those of a predator.

A predator who's rather pleased he caught his prey.

"Enough games. Look at me as I do this..."

He grins, opening his mouth just enough to reveal his fangs. Sharp and ready to sink into your flesh like candy....

"It'll be over soon. As I find myself growing fond of you, I'll make it quick."

Yet another lie tumbles from the vampire's lips. He plans to draw out this session with you. Wesker wishes to savour your taste like fine wine...

You stand no chance against him.

#yandere resident evil #yandere albert wesker #yandere vampire #panther halloween event 2022

[ardenssolis]

@dayrisen said (inbox):

❛❛ Forgive me for the weird question. ❜❜ A long moment of silence is finally devoured , her hands pressed into her lap as she stares at the mountains & hills. ❛❛ But , for you , what does protection mean ? What do you want to protect ? Have you ever been protected ? Is the object of your protection something you come home too or something greater ? ❜❜

     ❝OH? I WONDER WHAT brought about this…❞ Protecting others was of great importance to a Servant like Koto – a direct contrast to Ozymandias who only protected what he deemed his or was compelled to guard. He wouldn’t put himself in harm’s way for another in the same way that she would, but he never thought poorly of Koto for her selflessness. He did, however, worry that she acted too quickly when patience and observation would be better, but such was simply how Koto was. ❝Protection for me is protecting those under my rule. Be it me sending troops to keep invaders at bay, or ensuring villages are not under the mercy of bandits. My land is mine. My people are mine. Therefore all that seeks to take what belongs to me is to be at the mercy of Ra’s intense flame.❞ What did he want to protect, she asked… That was a little harder to answer. He was selfish, after all; a direct opposite of Koto in every way if one were to observe both of them and listen to them speak. The ones he had truly always wanted to protect were no more. So, what did he want to protect outside of that which he was duty bound to do so?

     ❝Why are you asking all these questions? And what does it matter to begin with? I am only here to save this world from the brink of destruction…but that is because if it is destroyed, my legacy is destroyed with it. That I cannot allow. As for whether I have been protected – is it not obvious? A king is always protected because a kingdom is placed upon their shoulders. If I were to fall, slain by enemy…or even slain by perceived ally, then everything falls into disarray.❞ He crossed his arms, observing Koto with a pensive stare. ❝You are a slayer, Koto, and I am a ruler. Our views will never truly align as you look to protect individuals, whilst I look to protect the whole. An individual lost is of little consequence to me, but to you…to you that has a greater impact because you allow yourself to see the individual.❞ He, though, oftentimes did not. People were people to him – nameless as they went about their day, their lives a mystery to him – their struggles included unless their struggles directly affected the kingdom itself. If someone died on the streets, he would not lament. Would not even know they were dead, nor cared.

     Koto would lament.

     She would weep for this nameless person. Would pray for them and hope for that their soul found peace that they might not have held in life. ❝I look to things far more greater than a single person. Although…I will protect our summoner if necessary. After all, the world’s salvation rides upon their success, and thus, for a time, I will ponder the importance of an individual.❞

#dayrisen #;dayrisen : koto #answered #;;inbox #;v: chaldea days #;;f.go

[stainedglassthreads]

A collection of Undertale AUs that I’ve thought up based on characters neglected by the fandom, but don’t really have the time or energy to focus on making a detailed fanfic or comic. I might do concept art, doodles, sketches, or short comics, but no promises. You can make fanart or whatever of these AUs, but please credit me for the concepts and if you use my designs, thanks-- 

Toriel-Centric AUs 

-Pre-canon AU where Toriel is pregnant with another child when Chara and Asriel die. Asgore is also aware of this, due to how he continues to age even after Asriel’s death. The child eventually befriends the next human to fall, to the point where they and the second fallen human leave the Ruins together. Tormented by memories of the last time something like this happened, Toriel is forced to remain in the Ruins grieving, or chase after them through the Underground. 

-No Mercy AU where a dying Toriel calls for help, and due to her bond with them the six human souls answer her call, allowing her to be the one to take the seventh human soul. Now she has the power to break the Barrier... but knows doing so will only cause more bloodshed, because the monsters are still demanding vengeance and war. After rejecting power and responsibility for so long, will she try and create a good ending for everyone, including Asgore and his subjects, or will she try and punish them? 

Not to mention, the possibility of discussions between her and the seven souls, and trying to understand why Frisk did what they did... 

Mettaton-Centric AUs 

An AU in which Mettaton, for whatever reason, never gets his ideal body, and takes up a habit of spending time in the Ruins, where there’s less of an anti-human sentiment than the Underground proper. Upon meeting Frisk he’s instantly starstruck, and decides to accompany them throughout the Underground, taking on the role of Narrator. 

-Roleswap AU where Mettaton is the Caretaker of the Ruins, trying to give humans who fall a good life, while a depressed Napstablook who rules the Underground has given up entirely on ever leaving, which leads to a quiet, subdued, and emptier Underground rather than a vengeful one. 

Alphys-Centric AUs

-I one wanted to make an askblog for an Error Alphys once, once located at @newcore-askblog, but it was very short-lived. She originated in a Queen Alphys ending where she returned to Determination experiments, but an accident landed her in the Anti-Void, where she glitched out while grieving the fate of her subjects and her world, destroyed by a human’s rampage. 

As Error Alphys, she created a new area similar to the Omega Timeline known as the New Core. It was a very dystopic and dieselpunk-inspired area which was filled with defensive traps and the ability to rearrange and reconfigure itself, like the normal Core, but which also functioned as a home for No Mercy-run survivors. Despite this, food and power were always concerns for the New Core, so they’re always making connections with other AUs to feed their population. 

In order to circumvent an Error’s inherent memory problems, Errorphys was always making notes and recordings in the New Core’s databases. Despite genuinely wanting to protect and do right by her subjects, she was also a very emotionally unstable and erratic personality, with an incredibly deep-seated paranoia and loathing directed towards humans. While any monster was welcome in the New Core, any human she came across would have their soul taken to act as a battery for the enormous machine. Not even Core!Frisk would be able to escape this hatred from her, but she wouldn’t be all that more affable towards Error!Sans, viewing him as someone untrustworthy, irresponsible, and childish. 

Undyne-Centric AUs

-Hadestown/Undertale crossover AU where Undyne is the bright and idealistic-to-the-point-of-unreasonable Orpheus, Alphys is the more depressed and cynical Eurydice, Toriel takes Persephone’s role, and Asgore takes Hades’ role. At the  climax, rather than singing a song to melt Asgore’s heart, Undyne has a really over-the-top anime duel while screaming about the powers of love and friendship. 

#undertale #undertale au #undertale headcanons #toriel #mettaton #alphys #error alphys #undyne

[cmcsmen]

The Big Picture About Passing Judgment

Where to draw the line, as Catholic men, in treating others with dignity and respect.

As Catholic men it is our job to be the priest of our household as a husband or father, known as the  domestic church, as well as to make a positive difference in the public square. However, it is said that your family can be your worst critic, so it is important that we know were we stand when passing judgment on others.  Let us start with the scriptures ..

Judging Others - Matthew 7:1 1 “Stop judging, that you may not be judged. 2 For as you judge, so will you be judged, and the measure with which you measure will be measured out to you. 3 Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s eye, but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove that splinter from your eye,’ while the wooden beam is in your eye? 5 You hypocrite, remove the wooden beam from your eye first; then you will see clearly to remove the splinter from your brother’s eye. ”

And the Catholic Catechism 1861 says:  Mortal sin is a radical possibility of human freedom, as is love itself. It results in the loss of charity and the privation of sanctifying grace, that is, of the state of grace. If it is not redeemed by repentance and God’s forgiveness, it causes exclusion from Christ’s kingdom and the eternal death of hell, for our freedom has the power to make choices for ever, with no turning back. However, although we can judge that an act is in itself a grave offense, we must entrust judgment of persons to the justice and mercy of God. 

Many of you know how I’m an avid photographer, and you may recall the saying how a picture may be worth a thousand words. Today with digital technology pictures (and video) are playing a increased roll in how we view the world around us, that educate and inform us. And for this reason I say pictures are worth way more than a thousand words, to the point that we can read too much into them before talking to the people involved to learn the facts.  

Every person should have a right to their own opinion without being judged for it. We may not agree with them, but should not treat them for their opinions or the person they are. In other words, we can come to a rush to judgment if we don’t make the time and investment to learn all the facts about what we are seeing in pictures and what we are being told by others about them. And by pictures, I also mean looking at the big picture in the decisions we make with our marriage and children, and the circumstances we face in the workplace and in the public square.

We see this in news and politics, and on social media, all the time. But we should not take this as acceptable behavior if we are to make Christ the center of our lives as Catholic Men.

For example, I’m sure you can relate, I have some family members and friends who judge others because they don’t agree with a certain way they are living or what they believe, say, or  do about something. Because of this, they treat others like a second class citizen or not worthy of their respect. We have to remember that, as Catholic men especially, when treating others to do so with dignity and respect even when we don’t agree. This welcomes God’s judgment instead lest we be judged.

God doesn’t need you or I to do His work, he needs us to share the Gospel message, through words and deeds, and be a point of redemption for each other – and that is the big picture about passing judgment.

Thank you for reading. Enjoy your day.

Frank J Casella, CMCS-Director Scripture footnotes:

* [7:1–12] In Mt 7:1 Matthew returns to the basic traditional material of the sermon (Lk 6:37–38, 41–42). The governing thought is the correspondence between conduct toward one’s fellows and God’s conduct toward the one so acting.

* [7:1] This is not a prohibition against recognizing the faults of others, which would be hardly compatible with Mt 7:5, 6 but against passing judgment in a spirit of arrogance, forgetful of one’s own faults.

* [7:5] Hypocrite: the designation previously given to the scribes and Pharisees is here given to the Christian disciple who is concerned with the faults of another and ignores his own more serious offenses.

[yandere-daydreams]

Title: Karma.

Pairing: Yandere!Xiao/Reader (Genshin Impact).

Word Count:  2.1k.

TW: Imprisonment, Mentions of Kidnapping, Codependence, Possessive Mindsets, Non-Consensual Touching, Physical Abuse, Slight Victim-Blaming.

Somewhere, in the back of his mind, Xiao knew that this was what he deserved.

This, all of it, everything. Whatever the world had to throw at him, all the things he’d earned over centuries of bloodshed and death and guilt that grew more crippling with each passing day. He’d come to terms with that, and if he was being honest with himself, he might admit that he was growing numb to the pain, that despite his distaste, violence didn’t seem as utterly unpalatable as it used to. He wasn’t thankful for it, he didn’t want it, but he was resigned, apathetic, too used to it to care the way he used to, when fighting left him as battered as his enemies. He'd grown accustomed to it. He’d adapted.

He just wasn’t used to this. A new sort of discomfort. A different kind of pain.

He just wasn’t used to you being the source of his karmic suffering, whether or not you realized it was quite that poetic.

He’d earned it. He knew that. He’d earned every part of his current punishment – your glare, your locked jaw, the unadulterated loathing that emanated off of you in waves, unignorable from the moment he shrugged open the heavy, wooden door to his crowded room on the inn’s top floor. He’d managed to stave off the urge to use chains, ropes, anything more solid and more restraining than an idle threat and a locked door, but you were smart enough to stay balled up in the furthest corner, your knees pulled into your chest and your eyes on the floor, narrowed with an intensity he’d only ever seen in demons, moments before their deaths. It hurt him to see, the stance too defensive not to be learned, but it was better than the alternative. He’d caught you on the balcony, once or twice, leaning over the railing or admiring the view, and…

You could’ve slipped. You could’ve tried to jump. He shouldn’t have lost his temper, but you shouldn’t have been so reckless. It’d been dangerous, even you were still too naïve to see that.

Xiao grit his teeth, shaking his head as he forced himself to focus on the matter at-hand. You didn’t move as he approached, only shrinking further into yourself, becoming something small, something timid, a form of passive resistance you’ve perfected, in the weeks since you last put up a real fight. If he was feeling any less patient, he might’ve resorted to less honorable methods, throwing you over his shoulder and dragging you through his routine of self-indulgence despite your attempts to struggle against him. He’d tried it before, broken his own promises countless times, but it was almost never worth the way you’d cry afterwards, like he’d hurt you, like he’d done anything wrong. Like you could expect him to do anything less, when you were determined to be so stubborn.

So, instead, he tried talking. Talking was more peaceful. He didn’t like talking, but you did, and he was trying to be more considerate of what you liked. “I’m back.”

He waited, but there was no response. That was fine. He was fine. He couldn’t say he’d never given you a reason to ignore him. “You’re not reading,” He tried, again, fighting to keep his voice even. You tended to flinch, whenever he got too loud. “It’d be a better use of your time than sulking around, like this.”

You didn’t look at him, your voice muffled by your self-made haven. “You keep burning my books.”

Burning? That sounded like something he would do, as an act of precaution or anger or the same petty vengeance creatures so far beneath him were so prone to. It’d probably been one of the anthologies you were so fond of – folklore hiding under the guise of real history. Usually, he didn’t pay it much mind, the liberal retellings of events no living mortal could possibly be old enough to have witnessed, but he didn’t care for it when you found value in such trash. Stories about the Adepti were far too common in Liyue literature, and you’d always been the type to ask questions, to try to pry your way into subjects you could never hope to comprehend. It was better to eliminate the problem entirely. That was how he’d survived for so long, among humans -- terminating issues before they could arise.

But, you wouldn’t understand that. And even if you did, it wouldn’t do anything to heal the wound he’d already created.

He was beginning to think nothing he tried would ever be enough to mend your anger, not when you were so content to tear at the stitching yourself.

“I said I was sorry, didn’t I?” He wasn’t sure if he had, but you didn’t correct him, only squaring your shoulders, digging your nails into your legs, going even further to block him out, push him away, isolate yourself and leave him to suffer for your insubordination. Xiao rolled his eyes, scowling to himself, but whatever irritation he could summon was quickly replaced by his exhaustion, that perpetual desire to fall into your arms and have you welcome him willingly, lovingly, the way you used to before he decided he had to ruin it. He was tempted to touch you, to reach out, to cup your cheek or wrap an arm around you or draw you close by force, rather than natural attraction, but he thought better of it, crouching by your side, instead, letting his back hit the wall with a heavy thud.

When he opened his mouth, his tongue felt heavier, his throat hoarse. Like the weight of his conscious had found yet another way to make itself known. “You hate me.”

It was a fact, like the color of the sky or the scent of the air before a storm. It was true, both of you already knew that, but you were kind enough to hesitate, lifting you head just high enough to see him. For him to see you, tiny and terrified. A trembling rabbit that knew better than to hope for mercy from a hawk. “I do.”

It stung more than it had any right to. “And there’s nothing I can do make you stop hating me.”

You laughed, at that, the sound breathy and sardonic, melodic and unabashed, akin to bird songs and wind chimes and every other beautiful thing Xiao could think of, even in its most beaten down state. He wanted to kiss you, to hold you, to deafen himself because he knew nothing would ever be half as lovely as that laugh, but you were talking before he could act on the impulse. That was for the best, really. Acting on impulse was what got him into this, and he wasn’t eager to drive you away any further. “I don’t have any other choice,” You started, your tone light, your anger softened into something playful. The kind of tender rage only you were capable of. “If I could choose not to hate you, I would. You were my friend, and if I could find any way to justify your actions, you’d still be my friend. I don’t want to think of you as anything else.” You paused, letting out a deep breath, relaxing slightly. Xiao couldn’t bring himself to celebrate the small victory. “I don’t want to hate you, but I have to. You see that, right? After everything you’ve done to me, I have to hate you.”

He deserved this, and you deserved to say it. He deserved to have his heart broken, crushed and shattered in his chest, and you deserved to be the one to break it. “I don’t want you to hate me, either.” It felt more intimate than it should’ve, a confession rather than common knowledge. You might’ve teased him for it, months ago, smiled and said something about softening him up. Now, your frown only deepened. “But, I need to do this. Your safety comes first. If something ever happened to you, I’d—”

Even in his own mind, his logic faltered. ‘If something ever happened to you’, like he hadn’t already done more damage than any monster ever could. It might’ve been more redeemable if he was honest, if he admitted he was doing this for himself, because he wanted to, because just for an hour, a minute, a few key seconds, he was idiotic enough to think he deserved to have you, permanently, whether or not you wanted to have him.

But, he couldn’t say that. He didn’t know how. His mouth wouldn’t form the right words, so he was left to say the wrong ones, his tone taking a sharp turn towards hostile as he spoke. “The door isn’t locked. I’m not keeping you here. You can leave, if you’re really that miserable.”

You shifted, and Xiao’s throat went dry. He knew the answer, and yet, it still hurt to hear it in your voice, to know you were capable of inflicting such insufferable pain. “If I try to, will you let me?”

He wouldn’t. Of course he wouldn’t, he couldn’t even tell himself he’d try. He’d hunt you down to the ends of Teyvat if he had to, spend the rest of his immortality finding you and making sure you never had the chance to do something so short-sighted again. He could make the guilt more bearable, promising himself he’d take care of you, that since he couldn’t do away with the cage entirely, he’d do his best to make your prison a comfortable one, but you’d still be unhappy, you’d still hate him. He’d hate himself, too, but that might be the one aspect of your relationship he thought he could stand. If nothing else, Xiao didn’t make himself a stranger to self-loathing.

“I love you,” He mumbled, as if that counted for anything. “So much. More than you could possibly understand.”

“I know.” You were the one to bridge the gap, this time, a hesitant hand coming to rest over his. Something in his chest tightened, and for a moment, Xiao had to wonder if it was possible for a mortal to be so cruel. “But, I don’t love you. There’s nothing you can do to change that.”

You moved to pull away, fear fading into sympathetic pity, but Xiao didn’t want your pity, he didn’t want you to go back to hiding from him, trembling and screaming and treating him like some monster, a beast waiting to lash out. That’s what he was, really, but he didn’t have to admit it. He didn’t want to admit it. He didn’t want to let himself believe he’d fallen that far, and he didn’t want to let you treat him as if he had.

His grip was too tight, a whimper escaping your parted lips as he caught you by the wrist, but he couldn’t bring himself to care, not when it was so easy to jerk you towards him, forcing you out of your pathetic, laughable shelter and into his lap, his free arm latching onto your waist before you had a chance to pull away. The remorse was reflexive, immediate and instinctual, but for the first time, he allowed himself to ignore it, to bury it underneath the pleasant warmth of your skin against his and the bliss that came with being so close to you, with burying his face in your shoulder, with indulging every necessity he’d denied himself in the name of your comfort. Your hands were already on his chest, your entire body shaking as you made a weak attempt to push him away, but Xiao was stronger than you, and he loved you so much more than you could ever hate him. This was fair. That had to be enough to make it fair.

You shifted, the air catching in your lungs, but Xiao only bared his teeth, letting pointed fangs ghost over the side of your neck before he could regret scaring you. Maybe he wanted to scare you. Maybe it’d be better, if you were scared of him. At least then, he wouldn’t have to keep playing dutiful lover. 

“Don’t move,” He snarled, and instantly, you went still. He could feel your heart racing in your chest, hear the cracked sob you failed to swallow, but he wanted this, he needed this. You’d get used to it, with time. You might even begin to appreciate the weeks he spent coddling you, once you were exposed to the alternative. “I don’t want to hurt you, but I need this. I need you to let me have this.” He paused, giving you just enough to time to stiffen, to realize he wasn’t letting go. To realize he was never letting go, even if that meant you only grew to hate him more. “I don’t care if you love me. I need you.” 

Because he’d already gotten what he deserved. He’d already suffered, anguished, submitted himself fully to karma and reaped the consequences. The lesson had been drilled into him a thousand times, by his own hand another hundred. He already knew pain.

He’d already gotten what he deserved.

For once, he wanted to know what it would be like to get what he wanted, instead.

#yandere #yandere love #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere prompts #yandere imagines #yandere scenario #yandere oneshot #yandere genshin impact #genshin impact imagines #genshin impact #genshin imagines #yandere genshin #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #yandere xiao #xiao x reader #yandere xiao x reader #yandere fantasy #yandere fanfiction #yanderecore #yancore

[blzzrdstryr]

Like a fairy tale

Yandere!Diluc x maid!fem!reader

Wordcount: 1921

CW: Yandere and slightly suggestive themes.

You loved reading fairy tales as a child - they were magical and hopeful, a needed retreat for a child of destitute parents. They were a promise that if you were good and kind and beautiful enough, eventually some faraway prince would come by and save you from poverty. And you tried to be good - you were obedient and hardworking and you pushed your hardest in the local school, yet hardship and scarcity still trailed your every step - the meager earnings your parents made weren't enough to buy you nice clothes or let you eat until you were sated, which in turn made social interactions harder: some kids sneered and humiliated you, some tried to help you out of pity. You disliked both groups: whether they were friendly or aggressive towards you, they still looked down on you.

Thus you decided to distance yourself from your peers - there was no knight in shining armour galloping towards you on a snow white steed, yet a good education could be your golden ticket to a better rich life. It was hard at first - to work and to study and to help your parents all while ignoring the demeaning and insulting comments the bullies made, but you gritted your teeth and pushed forward, imagining how wealthy you’ll become in the future and in the end our efforts were rewarded - you graduated as the best student, that led you to receiving a scholarship from Sumeru academy. Sparks and shine appeared in your eyes as you read the letter, barely stopping yourself from outright squealing and jumping from joy.

The moment of happiness didn’t last long though, as a reality again reminded you that there’s no place for fairy tales in the real world - scholarship covered the full cost of apprenticeship, but only it - you still had to spend money on the journey from Mondstadt to Sumeru, a place to rent and food, and if you still could find a job after your arrival in the foreign country and pay off the later two, trip required mora that you never had. At first you had a mad idea to traverse Teyvat on your own two feet - it would be a slow and arduous process, but cheap nonetheless. You later gave up on this plan - archons didn’t give you any vision, nor did you have fighting and travelling experience to aid you on the trail that no doubt would be full of slimes, hilichurls and other dangerous monsters.

And that’s how you started job hunting - you took on any work that promised you a hefty pay, be it some boring reports for guild of adventurers or an exciting yet risky endeavor of getting information for an extravagant cavalry captain, which then led you to Dawn Winery. Head housemaid, Adelinde, posted a job opening for a maid, and the prospect of a stable salary, free food and comfortable bed was enough to lure you in there - two or three years ago the previous owner of the winery died in the accident and his successor left Mond for some reason, leaving the maintenance and management of the winery on the shoulders of the said housemaid.

After a quick interview, the head maid demanded you to show her your cleaning skills, which you effortlessly did, having to look after the house by yourself all your childhood. It seems she was satisfied, as she nodded to you and asked to follow her as she led you to your room. Compared to the other two maids here, Hillie and Moco, who preferred to spend their work time in idle chat, you came off as highly professional and diligent worker. This contrast raised both your position and salary in the winery, as Adelinde started to entrust you with tasks more interesting than simple sweeping and cleaning.

You were outside the winery the day you met Diluc - returning from the city and carrying several stacks of milk and wheat you got chased by the hilichurls. Monsters didn’t leave you, no matter how long and how far you ran. You were ready to drop all the goods and have Adelinde to scold you for wastefulness and dereliction when Ragnvindr appeared and stole a breath from you. He looked just like the prince from your childhood tales, impossibly pretty and strong, arriving just when the creatures caught up with you and then defeating all of them with a single slash of great claymore. And just like a fairytale prince he helped you to get up and collect the scattered baggage and asked if you were okay. Then you two headed for the winery, you didn't know that he was it's owner at the time, chatting and thanking him, as he carried purchases. Adelinde almost fainted when she saw the return of the prodigal master in your company. After hastily taking goods from his hands, she made you apologize for rudeness and insubordination, but Diluc interrupted you saying it was fine.

Ragnvindr heir returned back to the winery and life went on its own, except the unreadable glares Diluc started to send you when you both were in the same room. It started off small: the quick glances that soon grew into intense staring. With his impassive stone face it was impossible to tell why he was glaring at you so much, so you acted as polite and professional as you could in his vicinity - after all you didn’t want to get fired and look for a new job. The key to this riddle presented itself during one day.

It was a bleak windy morning when Adelinde sent you to the city again, and as you walked the sky darkened and rain started. You returned absolutely soaked and shivering, teeth chattering and limbs slightly numb from cold and when Diluc saw you he ordered you to change in a low commanding voice. Frightened by the possible dismissal, you hurried putting on the uniform. Because of the haste you pulled it too tightly, hiking up a maid dress a little. It wasn’t up enough to reveal your hips or thighs, showing just a portion of knees that was usually hidden by the wide skirt.

Diluc’s eyes were glued on the uncovered joints, a subtle blush appearing on his pale cheeks. You continued to work, feeling how he consumed your legs with his eyes alone. He is lusting after me. You didn't know what to do with that revelation back then, embarrassed and slightly scared of attracting master Diluc's attention.

Nonetheless, an answer quickly came on the next day as you found a bonus to your salary, so big that it could be considered a payment for the next month. Diluc, despite his usually impassive face, seemed to be ashamed of the thoughts he had yesterday, with the body language telling you of his true feelings.

A plan came to mind. You hated yourself for it at first - it was low and disgraceful, you felt like a stereotypical manipulative gold digger, yet still decided to realize it in life - you needed mora, as fast and as much as possible. Over the time you spent working at the Dawn winery you noticed that Diluc, despite his obviously high intelligence, wasn't really good at judging one’s character, so he fell for your scheme pretty easily. Design you had in mind was pretty simple - to stir him up with small, innocuous gestures and changes that would slip past the outsider’s eyes.

Sometimes you applied a thin layer of healing lip balm on your lips, that so conveniently happened shine and glitter under the light, sometimes you donned your dress a little bit higher, opening the view of two delicate knees and sometimes after cleaning and working all day you felt so hot that you had to unfasten one or two buttons to cool off. Diluc, despite not showing it on his face, was obviously distracted and aroused, hands clenched into fists and a shaky, barely controlled exhale escaping his nose.

He started to pile you with bonuses and prizes; “for a well done job”, he said one time, averting his gaze and masking the shame in his voice under a huff. He also started to request you to specifically clean the rooms he occupied, his eyes sizing up almost every inch of your body. You felt how the lust and desire radiated off him, how his hands itched to trace your skin and have you at his mercy, yet he stopped every time with his steel strong control and self-discipline. You sensed how it dwindled little by little.

Diluc, in some perverted sense, was that fair prince of your childhood daydreams that would save you from poverty.

You almost had saved up the needed amount of money when you noticed the loss of your most cherished possession - an invitation to the Sumeru academy and scholarship certificate. With heart booming in your chest you started to look for it in the whole winery, without giving out that you were searching for something. It seems that you were unsuccessful in your attempts, as master of the winery soon called you into the office.

Here, he was sitting behind the desk with a familiar paper in his hand - your eyes widened as you saw it and you had an urge to run up to him and snatch the invitation from him. You performed a curtsy instead, closing the door behind you and waiting for him to speak, eyes still on the sheet in Diluc’s hold.

“[First], you are a diligent and skillful employee, Adelinde has a very high opinion of you” he started from afar, a slight rosy blush dusting his cheeks at "skillful employee".

"So as your employer I wouldn't want any harm to befall on your person, and" he shaked the invitation a couple of times, "it came to my attention that you were planning on travelling to Sumeru. I advise you against this nonsensical idea".

You gritted teeth, careful not to insult him with the couple of barbed words at the tip of your tongue. Nonsensical idea? This was your goal, a main reason why you worked so much and allowed yourself so little.

“I am sorry, master Diluc, I am afraid I can’t abandon this idea”, you say, response flat and controlled, a thunderstorm of emotions hidden beneath the faux calm, “It is my goal, and the main reason why I work here”. So I can have a bright and secure future, in which I won’t have to worry about the tomorrow ever again.

“I also learned that you were born into a low income family and you had to struggle in your life because of that ” a sudden mention of your less than glorious origin makes your face burn from the shame you thought you buried a long time ago. You are stunned, so he continues: “I believe this little endeavor of yours is also motivated by your desire for a stable future. Drop it, I travelled all across the Teyvat and there are horrors that can easily destroy you both in body and spirit”.

He stands up from the desk, and gets closer to you: “I can look after and provide for you, just stay there and you won’t have to worry about the future again ”. His hold on the paper gets tighter, pyro vision shining with a dangerous glint. A faint smell of smoke spreads through the room - a warning if you remain stubborn and unyielding.

Who could have known that the fair prince was a greedy dragon all along?

#yandere genshin impact #Yandere genshin #yandere diluc x reader #Yandere diluc #Yandere genshin impact x reader #Yandere genshin x reader #Yandere #Diluc #Yandere x reader #my writing

[nebraska-is-a-myth]

So I’ve been watching older clip compilations of Erets pov during the start of the dream smp/l’manburg war and I love learning about Erets character. Because these clips show how much they have changed as a person. Like in these clips, Eret is the villain. He is a downright villain. They are re-iterating Dreams driving message of "no mercy" all while laughing in the faces of the people who were their family. Eret laughs at the crater and ruins of l'manburg, declares that "victory is sweet" and gorges on golden apples all while the remaining soldiers cower away in Tommy's bunker. When asked if she regrets it, she responds with "hell no" and even builds herself a makeshift throne while she listens to her former president and second in command cry out in surrender.

"I did everything and it wasn't enough, we weren't going to win so I left."

Eret doesn't act like someone who just lost hope, if Eret truly only switched sides because they thought l'manburg never stood a chance, why make a deal with dream. Why laugh in l’manburg faces, why boast about their victory and sit on a golden throne?

Sure lost hope was apart of all of this, but it wasn't the driving force

I also want to know why Dream promised him friendship, and why Eret makes a point to include it regularly in the terms of their deal.

Eret was surrounded by people who admired him in l'manburg. Tommy was the driving force of a lot of opinions in l'manburg because he liked to shout loud and clear about his opinions for everyone to listen. Tommy has always worn his emotions on his sleeve, ( We also see this later as he shouts directly at Eret about trust and how land and power wont get him anything. Even fundy goes on to say "he's mad, but not as mad as tommy." It's no wonder Eret seaked Tommy's approval most, because Tommy was the one who constantly told Eret how much it hurt.) - and Tommy had such positive opinions of Eret, he admired them so much, possibly on par with Wilbur. And they had a deep connection with Fundy too, which proved itself to be just a strong as they were the first to reconcile after the betrayal. Tubbo and Eret were often seen as brothers, and while Wilbur and Eret never explicitly spent much one on one time together, Wilbur did speak fondly of him. So why did dream offer Eret friendship if they already had so much of it? Could this have been the first signs of dreams manipulation? Who knows what c!Dream told c!Eret in that meeting that started it all. Even on the first days of Eret joining the server and l'manburg being founded, Dream seemed eager to get Eret on his side with public in game messages.

But it's not all down to Dream in these scenarios.

Eret built the majority of the l'manburg walls, even on the very first day of being welcomed into l’manburg Eret was put to work. Clearing out a hill, placing blocks, grinding for gear. And sure Eret gets thanks from Wilbur and compliments from Tommy, but past that first day nobody really gives Eret a second thought. Nobody looked at the l'manburg walls and remembered, "yeah Eret built those" They think "oh l'manburg built those '' but nobody views Eret as part of l'manburg so really, Eret was forgotten.

So there is an argument that Eret could have betrayed l'manburg because she wasn't being treated fairly/being recognized for her contributions. However, Wilbur and Tommy were so in awe of Eret, Tommy mostly, and put Eret on a massive pestle. So I do genuinely believe that Eret betrayed them for greed and power, as much as I want to pretend it was Dreams manipulation, while it may have played a part, Eret was also fully aware of what they were doing, and why they were doing it. Eret was power hungry and greedy and wanted status. Something she never would have gotten in l'manburg. And while she states it was “the merciful way out” for the remaining citizens, the statement itself is also a contradiction of those moments on the battlefield where Eret would chime in with the others shouting "no mercy".

"Eret your a traitor and a bastard" "oh I know"

"Eret I hate you alot" "Understandable"

[ Erets reactions to the people of lmanburg stating their dislike for him, only 11 days after the initial betrayal. ]

I really just want to see that one moment of regret that starts it all, where Eret thinks of his actions and wishes he could take it all back. Because there is no remorse on this final day, on the day of independence Eret believes it to be a victory. I want to see the moment, the sentence, the second of Erets first regret. Like what changed for this downright power hungry, vengeful, mistreated villain want to make amends for every bad thing they've ever done? Eret turns from this loud, prideful king, to a meak, regretful pawn. And I just wanna know man, I want to be able to see the full story played out in front of me and see every single feeling of doubt that leads Eret to wanting redemption.

TLDR: Gimme the fukin Vods Eret. This is a threat.

#the eret #eret #eret analysis #dream smp #mcyt #dreamwastaken #I miss lmanburg #before the betrayal #i think about it every day #nebraska speaks #tommyinnit

[inhuman-obey-me]

On Simeon and what it means to be an angel

The beautiful, gentle angel who can smile through just about anything. But what's underneath the ever-present smile of his? Is he really just pure, sweet, and kind?

Not at all. Simeon can be very mischievous at some times, and scarily wrathful at others. Some of you may be thinking, just what kind of angel is someone like that? Well, let's talk about that.

(includes spoilers up to lesson 52)

Starting with the idea of what angels are supposed to be like - the common, pop-culture characterization of angels is that they are pure, merciful, peaceful beings who can only do good and are horrified by anything dark or bad.

And admittedly, Simeon doesn't seem to quite perfectly fit that mold.

[Disclaimer: Neither mod of this blog belong to the Abrahamic religions, so this is purely from our own research]

In terms of how angels have been described in various scriptures, however, this isn't actually what they are like. Angels act on behalf of God, and are usually not meant to have any free will of their own. The thing that separates angels from demons is not a tendency towards kindness and purity, but that their actions are aligned with God's desires rather than their own. What this means in effect is that, both in actual scripture and in the game, angels can and will do things that are a lot less pure and peaceful than their modern mainstream depictions would suggest.

For example, there is a part of the Bible (at least in various versions) where it is mentioned that an angel was ordered by God to kill one hundred eighty-five Assyrians, leaving their camp full of dead bodies in the morning.

The poet Rainer Maria Rilke states in his The Duino Elegies - "Every Angel is terror".

Seraphim - which is what OM!'s renditions of Simeon and Lucifer both formerly were - are basically six-winged snakes. Cherubim, as OM!'s Beelzebub formerly was, are actually multi-faced humanoid-lions with wings. "Do not be afraid," is a line angels often say when they meet humans because they are just as scary-looking as demons - just they're, you know, the "good" ones.

Actual descriptions of angels aside, even in-game, we are presented with example after example that angels are not perfect "pure and good" beings either. The game itself emphasizes this point at various times - if you upset Simeon during Surprise Guest interactions, one of his displeased lines is: "Just because I'm an angel doesn't mean I'm all forgiving." In lesson 51, though he initially says he left Satan to be with the Angel versions of his brothers for Satan's benefit, if MC actually agrees that he was just being kind, he is surprised that they really believed him.

It's not just him, either. Similar to Simeon's upset reaction, if you give Luke a present he doesn't like, he says, "I know I'm an all-forgiving angel and everything, but even so, this is a little too much..." When MC briefly lands in the past, the brothers actually describe Simeon as the least intense of the seraphim. Back when the brothers were angels, Lucifer was still known for being strict and arrogant. On the more extreme end, Raphael was known for keeping the angels in line via the pointy end of his spear, as Asmodeus fears will happen to him as punishment for going to a party. And Michael himself, the top-ranking leader, who one might think should be the most angelic of angels, is described as a sadist. In the Angelic Demons event, Michael even gets Simeon to give the demon brothers cursed bracelets that temporarily turn them into angels. It's not a very nice prank to pull on them, as it makes the brothers miserable to be converted back to their old forms, not to mention that the curse goes so far that they are turned into the caricature of overly nice and polite angels - but as it could be considered more in line with pulling them towards "God's will," this would actually be considered a good angel thing to do.

As the game points out, being the least intense doesn't exactly make Simeon easygoing, either. In fact, we have seen at this point quite a few examples of Simeon's rage. As a play director, he berates the brothers so much over any mistakes that they call him a dictator. Not to mention, the reason they are in the play in the first place is because the entire previous cast quit because they couldn't deal with him.

Later, when he and Luke are running the Angel's Halo, he drags the brothers into helping out. Though he is shown still smiling, everyone agrees because they are terrified of his menacing aura. Even Diavolo, when on the home screen, remarks about hiding because he made Lucifer mad again, but it's Simeon who he calls "the one person in this world I don't want to anger."

On a much lighter note, some of his less "angelic" behavior also comes from his playful, mischievous side. As referenced earlier, he is surprised if MC believes he was just being nice, but if the player says they thought he was pranking Satan, it gives intimacy points with him, and he says:

He also joins in on the teasing of Luke, having his name as "Luke (Chihuahua)" in his D.D.D. contacts. Multiple of his home screen lines also show how much he loves messing with Luke in general:

"I'm free right now, so I think I might go and tease Luke."

"Luke is like a Chihuahua who thinks it is a German Shepherd. Cute, huh?"

"I'm back! I was so excited to meet you that I left Luke behind."

"If you don't eat enough breakfast, you'll turn out tiny like Luke."

Plus, in dance battles, one of his chibi poses is him teasingly scaring someone, while Luke has a corresponding scared pose, suggesting that he may be meant to be scaring Luke in particular.

He also gets MC to mess with Belphegor when they are looking for him, instructing them to kick the tree that he knows he's probably asleep in as hard as they possibly can.

However, while none of those things make him any less of an angel, there is evidence to support that he is, in fact, a "bad" angel in a different sense.

As the two Celestial Realm exchange students, Simeon and Luke represent two opposite ends of a spectrum of angel attitudes. Luke, having still been very young when the Great Celestial War happened, has been taught to have very uptight views of the demons, insisting that they are evil and should be avoided at all costs. When he first arrives in the Devildom, he is terrified at the idea that the two of them could get corrupted by the demons and fall. This is the prevailing attitude taught in the Celestial Realm: that demons are wicked, and that angels are inherently better than them.

By contrast, Simeon does not hold this view at all. He is happy to spend time with the demon brothers, and doesn't look down on them for falling. On the home screen, Luke complains, "Simeon is too sweet to demons! He's sweeter than a cake from Madam Scream's!" In the Rain, a Fire and Simeon Devilgram story, Simeon even talks about how he actually prefers the hustle and bustle of the Devildom, feeling that the Celestial Realm feels too quiet now.

This difference between him and Luke is not only expressed in his fondness for the demons, either. Simeon understands the nuances of good vs evil, and he himself seems to operate in shades of grey at times, rather than being perfectly aligned with Michael's (and by extension, it's implied, God's) wishes. More than once, he displays quite a flippant attitude towards following the rules, such as his very hand-wavey dismissal when MC asks about his lying.

Luke also calls him out on his disregard for rules, saying that Simeon is just too loose about following them:

However, this glib attitude should not be taken to mean that Simeon doesn't know exactly what he's doing. When it seems the only solution to restore stability to the three realms is for MC to sever all their pacts with the demon brothers, he quickly realizes that the other option, the Ring of Light that used to belong to Lucifer, must be hidden among Michael's things rather than lost to time as everyone thought. He tells Luke that he needs to go back to the Celestial Realm to take care of something, but he is firm that Luke should not come with him - because he is going to steal the ring from Michael, a risky, rebellious move that he doesn't want Luke to get involved in. He is perfectly aware of what he's doing, and actively chooses to do it anyway, consequences be damned, because he wants to do what he feels is right.

When Michael does confront him about it, he's not the least bit sorry, either. In fact, he sasses him and talks back, unafraid to show disrespect to God's top angel.

We also know that he's been demoted at some point. Luke tells MC that Simeon is an archangel, making him one of the Celestial Realm's warriors, or as Simeon himself has jokingly described it, a "low-level grunt" who is overworked by higher-up angels like Michael. However, during MC's time travel back to the Celestial Realm, we learn that Simeon used to be a seraph right alongside Michael and Lucifer. It is again referenced during the fairy incident, when he makes the low-level grunt joke again but is then reminded that he was a seraph at this point in time. We're not sure yet why he was demoted - there's a lot of speculation on this point, and we can't draw any definitive conclusions yet - but if we take that being a "good" angel means being obedient to Michael and God, we start to get a far less rosy picture of Simeon's good standing as an angel.

What does this mean? Is he a "bad" angel? Kind of, but not for the reasons some may think. His mischievous, devious, and playful side is not what makes him less angelic. It is his more rebellious, nonconformist way of doing things that actually opens up the possibility of him gradually getting further and further away from being an ideal angel, and potentially putting him on the path of falling from grace.

#obey me #obey me simeon #om! simeon #obey me! #obey me swd #obey me analysis #character study #so now that we are outlining these .. they're all long #yes we said we were gonna focus on demons but #we also got to talk about our fave angel

[honeyatsu]

Loner [Junpei x f!reader] 3

warnings: minor mentions of bullying, minor blood.

Summary:

Junpei was suspicious of you. He always felt the world was filled with people who were naturally evil in some way, until you came into his life and challenged his theory.

crossposted here

masterlist

unorganized soundtrack

The sky’s the limit – a feeling that felt so far away to you, finally came back after years, while being at the top of the cheer pyramid, the crowd cheering you on for your team; for you as you strike the high-V pose, smiling at the crowd. It used to be scary, having to be at the very top, being the flyer, having to deny your body to react to the natural fatigue of bouncing around, repeating the same memorized routine, stunts, and cheers – only showing a smile and perfectly synched show to the crowd.

It used to be scary, having to trust your team to be able to hold you without dropping you. It was scary being brought into an environment where you were a part of a team, having only done sports where you would rely on yourself and your trained skills alone. To have a team where trust was such an important part of making things work, being at each other’s mercy when tossing you into the air, was horrifying to say the least. The act of trusting itself is scary.

Your eyes scanned the crowd slowly, subconsciously blurring them all out, it felt weird seeing all those eyes on you from that up high. Taking deep breathes you tried to steady your breathing, focus on being still and present and not let your mind wander because anything that goes wrong could lead to you falling down and being the cause of your team’s loss.

If you were being honest, you hated cheer – at least you did in the beginning. Admittedly, you were done with sports. You’ve been done with sports for a while, it’s not that you hated pushing your body past it’s limits, it’s not like you didn’t enjoy getting stronger, faster, more resilient.

But while being at the very top, while catching your breath and trying to be as still as you physically could, you couldn’t help but feel the excitement bubbling up in your chest by thinking about sitting with that black leathered sketchpad and a pencil. Honestly, a few years down the line, you found a new passion. The moment your pencil stroked along the first paper of the new sketch pad you’d gotten for your thirteenth birthday, you were hooked. It almost felt ludicrous, as if you’d be a part of an affair. Dedicating so much of your youth to athleticism, that being all you knew, your passion was led elsewhere while sitting on your bed with the fondest memory of your father teaching you basic sketching techniques.

But then are moments like this – the way the crowd would cheer for you, your team, the bright eyes beaming at you do what not everyone is willing to work hard enough to do, seeing the admiration of younger girls in the crowd, this feeling was enough for you too.

(You remember after your first martial art tournament, a young girl no older than the age of nine years old came up to you, saying when she grows up, she wants to be strong like you. Strong, that’s a word you would have never used to describe yourself as, but if sports are what brought the trait out of you, just leaving would be leaving a piece of you behind you weren’t sure you’d get back.)

You knew you would cause a minor deduction for your team, looking down at the dangling gold chain that slipped out of your cheer top, not keeping the eyes on the crowd for a mere few seconds can cause a strain in performance points along with the noticeable uniform violation. Mentally cursing yourself, you shot your head back up as you were thrown up in the air, performing the stunt known as the basket toss before landing on the ground. As soon as your feet touched the ground a familiar feeling of anxiousness flowed throughout your body like a stream, being done and awaiting the results were almost horrifying for you – knowing your small distraction could be marked as a huge slip-up. One thing you’ve gotten from being an athlete is you’re expected no less than perfection and being so new to this specific sport, you weren’t sure you were able to offer that, but it didn’t hurt your ego any less.

Waiting was the hard part – and that could be said for your entire team.

The motions of you and your teammates chest were shaky and slow, holding on to each other’s hands as you waited for them to announce first place. In your mind, the crowd was becoming larger while your team shrunk as their eager eyes gazed upon you, almost as nerve-wrecked to hear the results like you; every passing second, your team felt smaller and smaller. The saliva in your mouth becoming sticky and thick, rolling your tongue around trying run from the dry feeling surrounding your mouth. Your free hand subconsciously made way to the uniformed skirt, squeezing tight to the fabric– anything to physically release the unease churning in your stomach. For a moment everything was silent, you were so nervous that you put the world on mute as your eyes shut tight, anticipating the results that seemed to take too long to come.

The first thing you heard were the cheers, the announcement from the judges slipping your mind. In slow motion, you felt your team mates huddle around, crying, yelling, cheering, you all have just one first place to one of the most challenging competitions of the year.

You tried your best not to look at the section of your school, it’s been years since your mother has been to any of you sporting events; due to her heavy workload. A part of you was hoping to see one familiar face in the crowd, but you knew the chances were slim considering these types of things weren’t exactly his cup of tea. Before giving up your short search, you spotted the same brown hair you like to play with while sitting under a tree during lunch, the same long bang on the right side of his face that you want to push back so bad to get a full view of his angelic face he insisted on hiding from the world. He was sitting alone in an isolated row, far enough to be away from the large crowd but close enough for you to get a good view of him giving you a bright, wide smile, cheering for you loudly and proudly. You take it in – you almost forgot how good it felt to have someone cheering for you, it’s been years since seeing someone close and dear to you come to support you in these types of settings. You beam at him, waving frantically and cheering, giving him a smile that was so new to him, your cheeks high and corner of eyes wrinkled, a smile that says thank you, and he gave you a sheepish smile back, reassuring the same way you’ve been there for him, he will for you, even if it means coming to events that are out of his comfort zone.

After bowing and thanking the crowd for supporting your team, you guys head off to the back to go to the locker rooms to change and get ready to leave. Your teammates were chatting amongst each other while you were stuck in thought, how long it’s been since you’ve been in a competition that intense. You were used to being alone, not even having a consistent supporting system for a few years, it felt good to win alongside a team – a family that was given to you.

Before you made it to the locker rooms, you hear heavy footsteps frantically making their way to you. You turned on your heels as you see Junpei running towards you, out of breath and sweat dropping from his forehead. In a swift motion, he let his arms out and nearly tackled you – giving you the tightest and most affectionate hug he ever has in your time of knowing him. With him so close to you and squeezing you so tightly, you hope he missed the way your heart beat rapidly increased, you hope he missed the way that your body heated up feeling his chest so close to yours, feeling his heavy hot breathing trailing down from your ear to neck.

The few agonizing seconds was put to a halt as he pulled way, staring down at you, stars in his eyes with an enthusiastic smile, not even caring that he just ran the most he ever has in his life, not caring that catching his breath seems impossible, not even caring at those familiar glares from those girls you like to call your friends eyeing the two of you up and down with scowls on their faces.

“You did so good! You looked like….an angel! When they threw you in the air, a literal angel or fairy – or something.” He blurted out, the volume of his soft voice going a bit louder than you were used to. The laugh you let out sounded like warm honey, a laugh you weren’t even sure you could make anymore. Opening your mouth to thank him for his kind words, you were interrupted with sour snicker from behind you.

“Your new best friend is totally looking at your tits, babe.” Tsubasa said from behind you.

Your body tensed as her scratchy voice echoed in your ears, her sour voice matching the wicked personality she possessed. Your eyes followed where Junpei was looking towards, and you see that he’s taken notice to the golden locket that he hasn’t seen you wear before. You turn your head slowly, your face twisting as you saw the smug look on the girl’s face.

“It’s my necklace.” You spat back at her, “Mind your business.” You look back at Junpei, seeing the look of grimace on his face – you held in your chucked as you noticed the way his mouth was twitching, holding in his tongue trying not to let Tsubasa in the way of his personal celebration with you. The thing about Junpei, as soft spoken as he was, he always spoke his mind, always spoke up for himself, and if he didn’t vocally say anything, his face always gave away what he was thinking. You often wondered if he realized that or not, but you knew to save the question for another day.

Tsubasa resorted to rolling her eyes; deciding that snapping back wouldn’t be worth her time. She trotted away, disappearing into the hall – you wish she would disappear from your life, cheer captain or not, she was aggravating and bitter to say the very least.

Directing your attention back to Junpei, you place your hand on his shoulder, feeling his stiffened body and face relax at your touch, giving him a small reassuring smile, “I’ll meet you in a few, let me shower and change.”

The locker room was quiet – too quiet for a team that just won a competition that was this big. You kept your head held high making your way to your locker to grab your belongings to freshen up, not caring for the not-so subtle glances being suck towards you as you walked past all the girls. To be fair, after befriending Junpei you quickly knew why he was so antisocial and why you never met him before, even though you’ve been going to the same school since the first year. His avoidance tendencies no longer became a mystery to you when your friends would groan at the mention of him, the constant whining and reaction of disgust when you would leave them for him. It wasn’t long until you would see the subtle teasing he would endure because of your friends – it made you feel sick that these were your friends, it felt like you didn’t really know them after witnessing those small moments. But Junpei never mentioned it to you, never going further than ‘‘your friends are just jerks’’, since he never brought it up, you were sure not too, knowing how sensitive of a topic it was.

Once you stepped out of the shower, you hear the cheers and praises being sent back and forth between your team mates. Remembering the intense match, acknowledging their win and hard work being paid off. As you began to dry your body off you hear them mention going out to eat to celebrate their accomplishment as a team. Bringing your head up after drying off your legs, your eyes locked with Tsubasa’s and a sinister smirk spread across her face before she opened her mouth, “Don’t bother inviting (y/n).” she snickered, applying a thick coat of cheap sticky gloss to her chapped lips. “She’s gonna be with her boyfriend.” The word boyfriend being spat out venomously.

Along with the sneaky remarks being echoed throughout the locker rooms, bouncing from the walls you didn’t miss the hollered laughter, each shriek being equivalent to claws slowly inching its way down a chalkboard – being annoyed would be an understatement, “who knew you were into weirdos.” An underclassman on your team snorted out, that being the last straw for you.

You let out a load groan, frowning at the girls around the room with a sharp glare, “Can you guys just shut the fuck up? Are you guys sure you aren’t the ones who like him?” you said slamming your locker shut – causing the girls closest to you jump, nearly dropping the grip onto the towels that were covering their soaked bodies.

“Wha- ? We’re just joking, (Y/N). Plus, how well do you even know him?” Tsubasa displayed an over exaggerated look of offence on her face, mouth slightly open with her finger twirling the few front strands of her hair. You pulled down your shirt, your golden locket usually kept hidden fallen out as it did earlier during the competition. Eyelashes down, you lightly hold onto it with your fingertips feeling the eyes of the girls around you fallen onto the locket as well. The atmosphere of the room slowly changing, no longer a place of distasteful jokes but one of sorrow. It made your stomach churn, although this was your first time on the cheer team, most of the girls here were already your friends, including Tsubasa. It wasn’t until her remarks towards Junpei and the teasing you’d catch her do when she was sure you weren’t around that you distanced yourself from her, causing her to act out in a way that you were too unfamiliar with. The memory of you crying on top of your bed with Tsubasa and your other friends flooded your mind as you tightly gripped the gold heart that was now on your palm, the sweet words of comfort that once warmed you now becoming empty lifeless words as you become more familiar with the dark side of their personalities that they would usually keep hidden from you. After everything they knew about you, after everything you’ve told them, telling them how no matter how much darkness has spread through your life, you knew there was light and can see the good in everyone. You often voiced how thankful you were for them, having such kind-hearted friends, you could laugh now at how naïve and stupid you were to think that. “— We’re just looking out for you. Sure, you seem happy – or whatever, I guess. But we were here first, okay? He’s just a little…too reserved and weird. We just want to have you back. It’s just some fun teasing, anyways.”

You don’t remember when your chest began to feel heavy, or when the hot tears began to fall down your cheeks. You let go of the locket, bringing your hands to your face to wipe off the tears that snuck their way onto your face, “You guys – You know better.” You managed to say without choking, putting the locket back into your shirt to hide from the world – pulling up your jeans and grabbing your bag before you head out of the uncomfortable space.

Throwing your towel into the laundry bin, a firm grip was on your shoulder. You turned to see Ino, her pink hair up in a ponytail and large hazel eyes boring into yours apologetically, “Hey, I think it’s great you made a new friend you like a lot. Don’t be afraid to bring him around, not all of us are like that.” She whispered out. Ino was a transfer student, you didn’t know much about her other than she was soft-spoken, like Junpei, and a bit more reserved than the rest of the team. Earlier in the school year you were eager to befriend her but seeing her fall into the group of friends you were distancing yourself from, you thought it’d be best to stay away anyways.

“Right.” You said picking up your sports bag, “See ya next practice.”

~

“And then seeing you fly up so high…!” Junpei exclaims, his laugh going through your ear like a melody. His proud smile being the closest thing to resemble to sunshine in your eyes, his excitement on being a part of a school sporting event sending him on a quick adrenaline rush, “– It just felt good, finally having someone to cheer for. Y’know?”

You just nod, taking in the flushed look on his face as he begins to stuff his face with the ramen in front on him. As your friendship grew, so did his comfortability with you. The first few weeks of you coming into this ramen shop he would barley touch his bowl; it’s amusing to see him practically stuff his face without a second thought now. You didn’t know if it was his excitement on going to his first school sporting event or if he was just not shy around you anymore, but you didn’t care. Any slight display of vulnerability in your friendship with Junpei was a moment of accomplishment to you, so you made a deal with yourself to never think too deep into it and just enjoy these moments of breaking down his wall little by little.

As guilty as you feel, his voice vanishes as you stare at him longingly, his praises going in one ear and out the other. You notice the wrinkle in the corner of his outer eye, the way his cheek bone rises with each smile he makes as noodles hang from his mouth, you wonder if his excitement takes away from the worry he usually has when your too quiet – either way it wasn’t a horrible reason for your silence. You were just admiring his brightened face, feeling the small smile form on your face as your body reacts without thinking, pulling out your phone and taking yet again another photo of him, smiling off-guard, capturing another moment of pure happiness you never want to miss out on.

You see his lips stopped moving, eyes blinking back at you as he slurps up the last of the noodles that were hanging on his lips. You stare back at him – unmoved and unashamed of your sudden action. You snort after a few seconds of the silent staring contest that happened between the two of you, causing Junpei to lightly smile and chuckle to himself before asking jokingly, “Again?” Remembering the first time he caught you taking a photo of him off-guard.

You shrug back at him, picking up your own chopsticks and finally bringing your ramen to your mouth, you were so infatuated with Junpei’s praise and reaction you nearly forgotten how hungry you were. Junpei gives you a toothy grin as he goes back to his own bowl, with each smile he gives you, you feel the barrier he had up against the world slowly shrink in size.

Your eyes shift to your tote bag placed next to you, taking up that entire side of the red booth. You feel heat flush throughout your body as you see the leather black notepad sticking out, making itself known to you. You’ve been meaning to talk to Junpei about a project you had to do – one you’ve been working on anyways without his knowledge. Your friendship with Junpei was solid at this point, you knew that much. You knew your feelings towards each other was mutual, you were best friends, you also knew you had a tendency to often be too intense with the people you cared deeply about.

“You’re in my bag.” You whispered aloud, unaware completely of what you just said, your nerves getting the best of you.

Junpei gave you a quizzical look, his one visible eyebrow scrunched up as he swallows his food.

“I mean – ” you start off, “Pictures of you. I sketched pictures of you. They’re in my bag.”

His excited eyes burn through you, screaming at you without words to show him the sketches you were talking about. You gulp, heat rising to your ears, you hope he doesn’t notice your shaky hands reach for the book as you plop it in front of him, the first page being the first picture you snuck of him while he was at his club. He takes initiative and flips through the rest of the pages, seeing some of him sitting in class with his head placed on the palm of his hands, or him sitting under a tree.

Junpei’s fingers lightly trace over a specific sketch – it’s a drawing of a selfie that you two took together during lunch. He slowly looks up at you and you quickly avert your eyes to avoid his gaze, the feeling of embarrassment slowly introducing itself to you, a feeling you weren’t too familiar with.

Taking a deep breath, you look him in the eye as you clear your throat, “For my art class – ” you couldn’t hide the way your voice trembled with each passing word, “I need to paint something that makes my day, like, something you wake up and look forward to. Well, sitting next to you in class and coming here after, ditching practice and hearing you talk about some gross scary movie, it – that’s what I look forward to when I wake up…”

Your heart twists as you see the way Junpei’s face heats up, his face displaying different shades of red with each word you shakily spit out. You knew Junpei was closed off, becoming his friend and teaching him to let his guard down to form connections wasn’t easy – it isn’t easy. You fear anything too intense would scare him off, you fear being too open would crumble the friendship you were most fond of.

“I gotta – I wanna ask if I can paint you? A canvas and everything.” You mentally scold yourself at your choice of words, obviously a canvas – it’s a damn painting. The word vomit coming out and being stronger than you attempt steady train of thought.

You sit there staring at him – waiting, this felt like something that could bring you closer or pull you apart – if following him around, dragging him to this ramen shop, sneaking pictures of him whenever you had a chance didn’t kill the friendship, something like this possibly could.

What wasn’t expected was the warm feeling sneakily make its way onto your hand, a slight squeeze coming right after. You stared wide-eyed, seeing Junpei’s hand draped over yours. You watch silently in your booth, his hand placed over yours, a sight you would secretly fantasize about but quickly push away. Whenever the daydream occurred you would remind yourself, friends don’t look at each other that way.

“I look forward to you every morning too.” Was all he replied.

Needless to say, you had permission to use him as your muse.

_____________________________

Your fingers graze upon the corners of the pages of the magazine you were holding onto your hands, sitting with your legs crossed on the table with the four boys you slowly formed a friendship with.  You use your free hand to wave a cherry lollipop you snatched from Touya, one of the boys in the club with shaggy hair and glasses.

The chatter of the movie they’ve just seen and fallen in discussion to filled one ear while the music you were playing on your air pods filling the other, coming here to pass time by time has become a ritual for you. Once you’d gotten bored with the training that turned into gossip at the cheer club, you’d sneakily make your way to the Movie Club until it was time to go home, this place has become your safe haven. Here you have Junpei and the other boys, that you quickly made friends them, referring to them as your ‘sons’ as a joke.

You studied the pages from your favorite magazine – 6Teen— currently on the page of horoscopes. You usually skip these things, but the bright gold and purple designs caught your eyes, quickly finding your sun signs column, snickering to yourself at how generic these were. You weren’t one to go against the stars or the New Age spirituality that seemed to have your generation wrapped around their finger, but most magazine horoscopes were jokes themselves. You’d visit an astrologer before you ever took prediction meant to be read by their thousands of readers to heart.

‘ (sun sign),

You’ve been allowing your past to heavily effect your current circumstances. Keep an eye on those who keep their eyes on you, don’t be afraid of moving forward and allowing yourself to feel what you’re afraid of.’

You scoffed at the reading, bringing the cherry lollipop to your mouth and then releasing it with a loud ‘pop’! On instinct your eyes move up, catching Junpei staring at you and making eye contact with him. You see the flush spread across his cheeks, him seeing you twist and roll the candy around your tongue seconds earlier. The same feeling of butterflies fluttering throughout your chest caused you to quickly look down, avoiding his gaze that seemed to make you more nervous as each day passed by. Your eyes scanned the page you’ve just read “Keep an eye on those who keep their eyes on you…”, you quickly turn the page and pretend to bring your focus on the new article, on which hair style compliments you more based off the shape of your face.

Maybe you should think twice before mocking the stars and their messages – you thought – even if the messages are being sent through a magazine column.

You hear Junpei clear his throat as he goes back to his conversation, talking about how horrible the most recent Scary Movie was, something about how the franchise happened to get worse the more movies they made.

“Hey, what are you doing in here – (Y/N?)” You brought your head up, removing your air pod as you see a group of boys you were all too familiar with walk into the club room – their presence intimidating. Your eyes scanned them, remembering the moments you had laughing with them during lunch or after club hours, your stomach turning with disgust at these being the type of people you’d surround yourself with before you knew how they truly were, before you opened your eyes a little more and became a little less naïve with the idea that everyone was good.

“I mean, it’s our clubroom.”

“You guys aren’t in this club.”

You and Junpei replied in union, your eyes darted towards him, noticing his defensive stance. His trembling body didn’t match the stern look of assertiveness on his face. Good, you thought to yourself. A little teasing might not hurt everyone, but it was good to see him stand his ground towards the boys who would spit rude spiteful words to him in secret.

“Last time I checked, neither are you.” Shota said, the eerily forced smile he would impose throughout the day spread across his face– the same smile you learned to not trust when a classmate vented to you about him bullying him into doing his homework. The same smile you saw when he confessed to you, only hours after you heard him ridicule Junpei when he thought you weren’t around. “We were actually sent for you!”

You squint your eyes in suspicion, staring at the group of boys looking for any signs of malice. You don’t miss how two in the back hold in their snorting, trying to keep their eyes from you. “But – but no one knows I...”

Shota made his way towards you, bringing his head on top of your head and and patting it, “You aren’t as sneaky as you are pretty. I think you should head back before you get in more trouble than having us get sent for you.”

Your heads turn as you heard a slam on the table, Junpei’s teeth were gritted, eyebrows furrowed and griping onto the table, his eyes beaming with irritation, letting out an annoyed grunt seeing Shota get so physically comfortable with you and flirting with you right in front of him. Whether it was jealous – or your best friend simply being protective over you, it was hard to ignore the rapid beating against your chest, heat rising up through your body at seeing him get protective of you.

In an attempt to calm yourself down and ignore the racing thoughts, you take a deep breathe swatting Shota’s coarse hand from your head, “Right…” Collecting all your items you head towards the door, ignoring the snickering and whistles of the boys who began to uncomfortably surround you. “I’m gonna just go. See you after. Or just – just text me if you need me, for anything, okay?” You emphasize him needing you. Your stomach churned, feeling queasy as you prepared your leave.

Junpei just nods at you, his eyes not leaving Shota as you race your way out of the room.

The uneasy feeling never left you as you made your way back to the Movie Club room, and it only grew once you saw the sight of it. The chairs were spread across the room, one of the desks flipped over, and movies along with books scattered throughout the floor. Your mouth twists along with your chest, your vision going blurry and you began seeing red – red like the spots of blood you see splattered around the floor.

You dropped your bag as your legs reacted before you could process what you saw, tears forming in your eyes as you sprint towards the front of the school. The world around you became blurry, breathing frantic, you’re not worried about the strange looks from classmates or the ugly noises coming out of your mouth due to your drying throat. Once you make your way to the spot, your spot, you halt— the world around you still spinning, sweat dripping down your fingertips. The only thing going through your head is Junpei.

Junpei, Junpei, Junpei.

Where was he? Was he okay? Was the blood his?

He wasn’t at the spot in front of the school where you would usually meet at, he wasn’t at the club, and you didn’t even have his home address. You reach for your bag, cursing yourself as you noticed that you dropped it in his club room. Taking a few deep breathes you rush back, sprinting and ignoring the questions being spat to you when you pass the people you used to be friends with.

Once you got your bag you took out your phone, tossing your bag to the side as you shakily type out to him.

Sent: Why didn’t you wait for me? Told u to text me if anything. Are you okay? I hope you’re okay. Please just let me know how you are. Eat and sleep well for me, okay?

_________________

You lazily plop onto your bed, allowing your body to sink in the mattress. Your head was throbbing and throat scratchy, you cried your entire way home. You stare at the bag thrown across your room – coming home with no appetite you didn’t bother eating or making conversation with your mother. You decided your school work would have to wait until early in the morning.

Your mind was racing with questions, you turned and had your head facing the pillow, screaming into it while kicking your legs. Frustration took over your body, you didn’t even realize your eyelids slowly becoming heavier with each thought racing your mind.

You soon drifted off to sleep, not knowing that Junpei opened your message, leaving you on read.

You went to bed before realizing he was ignoring you.

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taglist:

pls let me know thru my ASK box if you want to be added/removed! It is easier for me to check and add that way, thank you ^_^

@wuvnoya

@loveinumaki

@i2kusou

@snackgod

@kasevna

@sillygoof

@chosos-sweetheart

@big-mood-bisexual

#junpei x reader #junpei yoshino #jjk #jjk fanfic #jjk junpei #jujutsu kaisen #poc reader x junpei #junpei x you #yoshino junpei #junpei x y/n

[minjiwritesstuff]

Omega X Kinks

Jaehan

blindfolding (receiving): i do believe that he enjoys being blindfolded and let you do whatever you want to pleasure him

hair pulling (receiving)

marking (giving & receiving): honestly, he loves marking you up because he thinks it's sexy as f, but he also absolutely adores when you mark him up because it makes his pride and his ego go up

honestly, last one i don't even know if it has a name for it, but he loves to fuck his cum back inside of you, he thinks it's so hot

Hwichan

light bondage (giving)

marking (mostly receiving): let me explain this one, of course, i think hwichan enjoys to mark you up because then he can mark you up as his, but he way much prefers when you mark him up because the feeling he gets while you use your lips, teeth and nails to mark him up gives him shivers down his spine

hair pulling (receiving)

last one, not really a kink i think, but it still kind of fits for the situation. i think that hwichan wouldn't mind getting caught by a member. his ego would go up to the roof if someone ever caught you two

Sebin

ice play: for some reasons, i believe that sebin loves ice play. whatching you shiver as he glides an ice cube on your skin would make him so horny. also pls, suck him off with a ice cube in your mouth, he'll moan so much more than he normally would (this sounds hot ngl)

bondage (giving): honestly, i think that this one and the previous one would go well together. but just sebin knowing that you are at his mercy and that he can do whatever he wants with you without you moving or so, he won't waste any time and start taking action ASAP

hair pulling (giving & receiving)

dry humping: idk if it classifies as a kink, but i do believe that it's something that sebin would enjoy

cock warming: again, not really a kink, but sebin would L O V E cock warming. and although it doesn't always lead to something else, it most likely WILL lead to something else. because sebin can control himself for such act, but if you guys were in that position for too long, he has to fuck you after otherwise he won't be able to function normally

Hangyeom

choking (giving): i don't really need to explain this one tbh... but the view of his hand around your neck while he fucks you turn him on so much

hair pulling (giving & receiving): if you pull on his hair while he eats you out, he most definitely will moan on your core and he will pull your hair most likely when you suck him off because it feels too good

like jaehan, i think hangyeom loves to fuck his cum back inside of you. he thinks it's hot and it more often than never make him go for a second round, sometimes even a third

cock warming: unlike sebin, this will always lead to something else. because yes, hangyeom has good self control and he can stay inside you for quite some time without moving, but as soon as he feels the throbbing in his lower area, he can't stay still anymore and has to move

orgasm control: hangyeom is a dom, so he loves to control things. so when it comes to orgasm, well of course he'll want to control your orgasms. but tbh, he controls his too so that you two can cum at the same time

lingerie: much like hangyeom's first kink, this one needs no further explaination. you + lingerie = a rock hard hangyeom

(i went overboard with this one jdjdjdshdjds i'm certainly not bias wrecked)

Taedong

chocking (giving)

daddy/baby girl: ok so taedong may be soft, but when it comes to the bedroom, his soft side stayed on the other side of the door. when ever you call him daddy, it gives him a rush of adrenaline, so that even if he was tired as shit, he gained back all the energy he needs. as for the baby girl, he uses it whenever the opportunity lets him.

strip tease

collars: he LOVES when you wear such thing as a collar, or really anything wrapped around your neck. you know that eye mask dance practice we got for what's going on? well... let's just say that his eye mask became something else

Xen

hair pulling (giving & receiving)

marking (giving & receiving, but mostly giving): this is simple. he likes being marked, but loves marking you up because you are his and his only

choking (giving): no furhter explainations needed

breeding kink: the thrill it gives him every time he cums inside (which is always) knowing that he could get you pregnant is so hot to him. it honestly could make him go for another round

teasing: jinwoo is a bitch, so of course he will tease you, but pls, for your own good, don't tease back

edging (giving): this is a form of teasing so i won't really explain, but he loves to edge you and he edges you so often that you sometimes cry from it, which leads us to our next kink

adoration of crying: if you cry from too much edging, or too much pleasure, jinwoo simply loves it

blindfolding (giving)

(i once again went overboard dfjdfjdfj)

Jehyun

fingering: although this isn't a kink in itself, i do believe that jehyun absolutely loves and LIVES to pleasure you, so ofc, fingering you is a must and it's something he adores

marking (giving & receive)

hair pulling (receiving): jehyun most definitly will moan almost every time you pull on his hair (which tbh sounds hot)

cock warming: i don't see cock warming being nesecerally something sexual for jehyun? for him it's probably more like a way to get closer and spend some time together? like if you are watching a movie or just cuddling together he might ask for cock warming at the same time. but i think that he, just like hangyeom and sebin, have good self control, even better than them. but of course, sometimes the pleasure gets to him more than the thought it would do so he ends up turning this into something more than a cuddling session

Kevin

light mommy kink: ok, this one. i don't think that jinwoo would call you mommy, but he definitely is more sub than the others. so he would do as you say and would be good for you

blindfolding (receiving): similar to jaehan, he loves it when you blindfold him and do what you want to pleasure him

palming: would be a moaning mess if you palmed him and he would love it so much. cums from it too because he literally felt in heaven and couldn't hold back

Junghoon

size kink: he absolutely loves being big for you pls

light chocking (giving): wouldn't choke you as hard as the other would, but he'd still do it because he thinks it's hot

cumming inside

dry hymping: similarly to kevin, he probably would cum in his pants because it just feels too good for him and he couldn't hold himself back any longer. what a messy boy

Hyuk

ice play

mirror sex: he would especially love to fuck you in the dance practice room

palming: this isn't quite a kink i think, but it gets him weak for you tbh. most likely will cum in his pants too because it feels too good

Yechan

light choking (giving): similarly to junghoon, he wouldn't choke you as much and as hard as the others, but he finds it hot when his big hand acts like a necklace to you

marking (giving & receiving, but mostly receiving): i think yechan really likes to be marked up. it wouldn't boost his ego like it does to jaehan, but he just enjoys seeing all the hickeys on him and remembering how good it felt when you sucked on his skin

hair pulling (receive)

#omega x #omega x smut

[eternalfarnham]

A thesis: No Mercy, the executioner’s route, whatever you want to call it, exists at least in part so that the injunction to stop here, the insistence that this is where you-the-player get off that comes at the end of True Pacifist has some bite to it — because you know there’s alternatives, this whole messy path of tormented, emotionally significant content that remains available to you, a chance to spend a little more time with everyone you love.

I mean, imagine the Asriel battle without route variations, or No Mercy — “If you ‘win,’ you won’t want to ‘play’ with me any more.” Yeah, of course not! What else is there to see? How much can you mine out of the concept of “charming dialogue” when you’ve already read all these completely deterministic lines and had all these fights? There’s no legitimate temptation for Flowey-the-player to embody any longer. You hit all the emotional moments and now it’s time to leave. There has to be a temptation.

And, ultimately? “Leaving the world destroyed” is, itself, a coherent and fully legitimate ending to this story and this world. You defeated the enemy and became strong; you killed the people who would have killed you otherwise; you had a good time being a demon. Great! Let’s leave. The reason resurrecting the world costs you your soul, when killing doesn’t, is because it comes back to that perverted sentimentality that is the core of Flowey’s suffering and the game’s most impactful (to me) thematic statement. 

A human child, given power, can choose peace and reconciliation above all. A human child, given power, can choose to embrace it and destroy everyone who ever thought of hurting them. Both options make sense within the context of this world; both let you act like someone from it, whether it’s traumatized, vengeful, stripped-down Chara or messianic, all-loving, flirtatious Frisk. But to choose both is to become something removed from the world’s context, an intruder from outside, something that fundamentally does not relate to people as a person-in-the-world would. Flowey imperfectly approximates this state, losing his ability to love others and learning to treat the world as a game, but he doesn’t have our outside view; he’s stuck with his people. We choose to stay; we choose to drag them back into the cell and lock the door because we want to keep them there, even though the barrier can’t restrict us for shit. Even if we can’t guide Frisk out, we can just, you know. Quit playing. Go back to our lives. Leave.

It’s that contradictory way we relate to game worlds, full of people we hurt despite — because of — the fact that we love them, because we have no other language to express our feelings and no other way to stay with them besides hurting them. Even when we have the option of pacifism, we have no other language but violence, in the end, to say I want to see you again.

#undertale #embarrassing effortpost

[loki-hargreeves]

Loki x Reader - Thanos controls You

Warnings: angst, mentions of torture, mind-control, fighting, choking, blood and gore, more angst (it's a lot ok)

Word Count: 5,8K

Summary: After failing to deliver the Tesseract, Loki has been living in fear that Thanos will one day find him again and seek revenge. You have been missing ever since Loki was imprisoned after what he did in New York. Little did Loki know that you were with Thanos all along. During the events of Infinity War, Thanos makes you battle Loki in order to obtain the Tesseract

Author’s Note: I know Thanos doesn’t have the mind stone at the beginning of Infinity War but it’s fiction and I’m gonna do what Marvel does best, ignore canon. Let’s blame the Other’s powers, okay? Please enjoy this angsty little thing! :)

YOUR POV

“There’s room for more!” Loki yelled over the cries of scared children and their crying families. There was no way he would send a half-empty escape pod on its way to Midgard. That’s when he saw a child all by herself a little further away. She was clinging onto the wall for dear life and the ship trembled due to the impact of getting shot at. Her parents were nowhere to be seen. Dead. Loki felt sick to his stomach when he knew they were most likely dead. Thanos’ children were slaying kids and their parents heartlessly and they had the audacity to say they were being rescued. That their deaths were part of something bigger than life itself.

They viewed Thanos as a god who was being merciful even when he ripped a beating heart out of someone's chest.

Loki’s heart clenched in his chest painfully. Before it would be too late, he made his way to the tiny child and picked her up carefully. She seemed to recognize the prince but she wasn’t afraid of him. Instead, she hugged Loki so she wouldn’t fall out of his grasp.

“Where’s mommy?” The girl sounded absolutely petrified.

Loki didn’t know what to say as he made his way to the pod. Once he reached it, he saw a woman by the entrance.

“You’ll be safe here,” Loki promised the child as he handed her over to the lady. That’s all he had time for as he returned to the corridor. A particularly loud blast made him stumble over his feet and he had to catch his balance by taking support from the metal wall. The lights flickered, which meant the electronics of the ship were injured. There was a strange smokey smell in the air, which lingered with the irony stench of blood.

Loki couldn’t believe this was happening. Had Thanos finally come for him? Or did Thanos somehow know of the tesseract? Either way, if Thanos succeeded, he would kill two birds with one stone. The thought of this being all his fault made Loki nauseous. Guilt was nibbling at his skin and he knew it would eat him alive in the end. He never wished for this to happen!

As he ran down the corridors frantically searching for Asgardians that needed help, he heard different kinds of cries. People were letting out guttural screams. Others were pleading for their lives. Listening to the massacre that was taking place was worse than any nightmare Loki ever recalled having. They were all drained after Ragnarok and now Thanos had found them. It was haunting how ruthless fate could be.

Footsteps began to approach Loki and they were awfully close. Too close for his liking. He was quick to grab his daggers and turn to face whoever dared try to sneak up on him. When he saw a familiar figure, he nearly dropped the blades from his hands. Seeing you there was like shock itself punched him in the face.

You were there, real and clear as day.

How long had it been since the last time he saw you?

Ever since Loki had found out about his true nature, his life had gone downhill. After he ended up with Thanos and went through pure hell with him, he had changed. During his time away from Asgard, he had only missed one person truly - you. You, who had been by his side through everything. You, who hadn’t loved him any less when you saw his deep blue skin and those crimson red eyes that in Loki’s mind resembled blood. You, who had seen him as the rightful king of Asgard when everyone else betrayed him. The light of his life, the angel that had cared for him even when he felt like a monster.

You, who hadn’t been on Asgard when Thor brought him back to face Odin in trial. Loki had spent a lot of time in his cell, alone. He waited for you to appear but you never did and no one ever told him why. They rather left him to drown in his own vicious thoughts. It wasn’t until Loki pretended to be Odin that he began to learn what had happened on Asgard during his exile.

The people at the palace loved to gossip. Some claimed you had stolen a ship and left Asgard behind for good, that living as Loki’s widow had been too hard for you. In Loki’s darkest hours, he wondered if you truly felt ashamed for being associated with him. So ashamed in fact, that you had left it all behind and started anew. Sometimes, he believed that, but it never stopped him from trying to find you. He had searched night and day but it seemed like you had vanished into thin air. It had killed him more every day living in the unknown. His only wish had been that you were okay.

Now there you were, looking like you had never left. In a moment of pure shock, Loki couldn’t even begin to comprehend how you appeared on the ship - seemingly out of nowhere. He was happy to see you, despite how appalling everything else was at that moment.

“Y/N,” Loki spoke your name softly and dared to blink. When you were still there as he opened his eyes, he felt goosebumps all over his skin.

You looked at him so innocently, but then he noticed that something was off. The look in your eyes was cold. You weren’t in your typical Asgardian gear. Instead, you were dressed in dark armour that Loki could’ve sworn he had seen before, but he didn’t know where. Nevertheless, it made him feel uneasy.

“It’s been a while, Loki,” You attempted a smile as you walked closer to him, your husband. It still counted since he had never truly died, right?

Loki didn’t stop you as you walked right up to him. His eyes never left yours. Part of him wanted to kiss you, to hold you and feel you were real, but the shrieks in the background reminded him of how dangerous everything was. The daggers disappeared from his hands and Loki held you by your shoulders. He needed to see that his hands wouldn't go right through you, that he hadn't lost it.

“You need to get off this ship, Y/N!” He told you seriously. There was profound fear in his voice.

Instead of being worried at all, you just smiled back at him.

That was so unlike you.

“Y/N, do you hear me?”

“Oh, I do,” You confirmed nonchalantly, “I’m not going anywhere. Not yet.”

A bloodcurdling cry startled Loki. They were coming closer and closer. The two of you wouldn’t be safe in that passageway for long. By now, his heart was racing with his thoughts. He felt panic settling into his bones.

Before Loki could say another word, you cupped his face rather gently. The fact that you didn’t seem disturbed by what was happening was eerie to Loki. He knew that you had a heart much bigger than anyone else he knew of. The version of you he remembered wouldn’t have been so calm. Something was terribly wrong.

“I need something,” You admitted and batted your eyelashes. Before, Loki would’ve found that quite adorable, but at that moment it was so wrong. He had been so ecstatic to see you and know you were alive, but now he almost wanted to run the other way.

“What?” Loki barely found his voice at that point. He felt sick and heartbroken. This had to be a nightmare, the worst kind.

“The Tesseract, Loki. I really need it,” You blurted it out.

Shivers ran down his spine. How did you know about it? Why did you even care? He was unsure if he could even trust you with the knowledge that he had it in his possession. Usually, he would’ve trusted you with his life without any hesitation, but you had been gone for years and returned like this, with bizarre motives.

You returned at the same time as Thanos and you were looking for the tesseract. Loki wasn’t a fool. He finally put two and two together and the realization was too arduous to believe. The idea of you and Thanos even meeting was something Loki could only see happening in his worst nightmares, but he was afraid it had already occurred. If so, he needed to hear it from you,

“Is Thanos making you do this?”

The tone of his voice seemed to offend you as you sent him a nasty glare. Your softness turned harsh and you pushed Loki against the metal wall with a loud thud. Before he could get out of the way, you grabbed your own dagger and pressed it against his neck so it was ever so slightly pressing against his exposed skin.

“He is not making me do anything. I am glad to serve the all-mighty Thanos. I won’t fail him, unlike you,” You snarled at Loki spitefully.

Never in a million years had Loki imagined this moment to happen. One where you would be fighting against each other. It was supposed to the two of you against the nine realms. Being held like that by the one person he loved more than anything was tearing his heart to shreds, but he tried not to show it.

Deep down, he knew it wasn’t truly you. He knew exactly what Thanos had done to you so you would act like this, and it only made it hurt so much more. It felt like someone was pouring salt into an open wound, and his entire body, heart and soul were wounded.

“Now give me the tesseract and we will be on our merry way,” You tried to obtain it again. This time you seemed more serious. Was it the tone of your voice or your weapon pressed against his pulse? Loki didn’t know.

“I don’t have it,” Loki lied as smoothly as he could because even thinking straight at that moment felt impossible. The world was caving in around him at supersonic speed.

You pressed the sharp edge of the blade closer to him, feeling how just a little bit more pressure would've broken his skin “You’re a great liar, my dear, but I know that’s not the truth.”

Loki didn’t want to fight you, but he didn’t see another way out. And it was good for him that you had learned most of the tricks from him. Your every move would be more easily predictable for Loki. He had to find a way to distract you.

“Why do you need it?” That was a foolish question. He knew damn well what Thanos would do if he got his dirty hands on the infinity stones.

“Why do you care?” You didn’t answer his silly question.

Suddenly, Loki grabbed your wrist tightly and yanked your arm to the side. He tried to be as gentle as he could, but Loki knew you wouldn’t go down without a fight.

At least your weapon fell out of your hand, but you knew how to defend yourself without it. So did Loki.

Loki tried to turn things around so he would have you pinned down against the wall, but you didn’t let him get that far. As he turned you around so your back was pressed firmly against his chest, you kicked your legs against the wall hard, pushing both of you back. Loki took the biggest impact as he fell on the floor, with you on top of him. Quickly, you rolled out of his grasp, turning around in one swift movement so that you were now sat on top of him, with your legs tightly against both his sides.

A powerful orb of magic grew above your fingertips and you brought it closer to Loki’s face - so close that he could feel the heat of your burning powers. The magic created an electric sensation on your skin. It felt like you pushed your fingers deep into warm sand. Toying with it was exhilarating, and seeing the astonished look on Loki’s face made it so much better. The green light of your powers cast light in his eyes, only deepening the look of disbelief that was painted all over him.

“It’s sweet that you’re trying not to hurt me,” You taunted him at that point, “but that doesn’t mean I won’t hurt you.”

“This isn’t you, Y/N,” Loki groaned. He was so sure of himself.

You tilted your head and smirked, looking at him like a cat would at a mouse. “I don’t know, Loki. It’s been a while,” You explained casually and leaned closer and closer to his face, stopping when your noses brushed against one another. By now, Loki was frozen on the spot. He was trying to come up with a plan and he felt hopeless.

“I’ve changed,” You whispered to him and felt tempted to kiss him, to taste him. Would you taste his fear? His heartbreak? You were sure it would taste sweet.

“The torture must’ve been painful,” Loki pushed his feelings aside. Yes, he felt like his heart had been ripped to shreds, but he had to do something. He had to surprise you, even if it would hurt. Words could hurt more than actions, and if Loki wanted to survive and to help you, he needed to reach the real you even if the only way to do so was cruel.

How did he know? You narrowed your eyes and surprisingly, found yourself waiting for him to continue.

"I was trained well."

"Trained?" Loki spat out harshly, "I know you're afraid. He has promised you something worse than the pain he has inflicted on you already. It won't happen. If you let Thanos continue his reign, he will not care about your loyalty!"

"Shut up!" That was too much for you. With tears brimming your eyes from anger, you put your hand over his mouth to silence him. He didn't budge and you didn't know why.

You pushed the memories aside. The painful memories of the time Thanos first found you. It was wrong to think of it as torture. No, he had shown you what you're truly capable of. It was training. Training to become a stronger person after the hell you endured on Asgard.

But now that you found yourself thinking about it, it seemed like the memories were all blurred as if you were looking into the past through a broken lens. Someone had spilt oil all over it and the pictures were warped.

"I know you have it," You needed the tesseract. "Give it to me and then this will all be over," you removed your hand from his mouth because it looked like he wanted to speak.

Loki knew that if he’d push you, your magic could burn him, but at the moment he couldn’t come up with another plan. He couldn’t just stay on the ground as people were being killed on the other side of the wall!

"Okay," Loki blurted out. Okay?

For a moment, he had you surprised which was the perfect distraction.

Loki grabbed your wrists tightly and pushed you to the side, but not quickly enough. You released your magic and it graced the side of his face, making him growl out either in pain or frustration - or both. The two of you rolled over and this time Loki was on top, holding your arms pinned above your head. You were trapped because of one mistake. You couldn't believe Loki had used the element of surprise to turn the situation upside down.

Furiously, you tried to kick your legs free, but he had you pinned down beneath him and Loki was strong. There was no point in squirming, you had to come up with another idea.

The two of you faced each other and Loki revealed his face and the damage you had done. Your magic had burned his skin and left a bloody cut on his eyebrow. It had just barely missed his eye. If he lived, it would surely leave a scar.

You flinched when a drop of his blood hit your cheek and it rolled down the side of your face.

"What are you going to do, kill me?"

Loki could never bring himself to kill you. He wouldn't be able to live with himself with your blood on his hands. No. He had other ideas. Loki remembered what it was like to be under Thanos' control. He remembered how much it hurt to even think about the torture. He had to remind you, he had to make you see that this wasn't the real you.

"This version of you, or I certainly hope so," Loki replied mysteriously. Before you could ask him to elaborate, Loki released your wrist and slammed the palm of his hand against your forehead. In a split second, you were in a different place - in your head. You could've sworn you heard him mutter "I'm sorry," before everything turned black.

It was hot, burning hot. Metal chains were attached to you and they were glowing red. Torching. You could only scream in pain as the metal sunk into your skin, your bones, your nerves. It felt like he had chained your mind and with the tiniest movement of his finger, he could make you do his dirty work.

He, Thanos, was sitting on his throne. He was the puppet master and you the puppet. He didn't look at you fondly. No. He was smiling as he watched you cry your lungs out, letting out animalistic growls as the pain got worse. It was so overwhelming that every once in a while, you would scream until you passed out. But every time, one of his children would be there to wake you up.

It was time for another round. And another. And yet another. Would it ever end?

Each time you tried to resist the chains, the strings that were sewn onto you and connected to his fingertips, it hurt more. Eventually, you learned that allowing the strings to tighten around you made it hurt less. It almost felt good, like a long embrace after a long day.

"I don't want to hurt you, my child."

Lies. You knew that all he said were nasty lies, but sometimes it was easier to believe lies than the truth.

"Make it stop!" You would beg him. How long had you been there?

You could remember Thanos touching your face gently, which was so comforting after everything you had endured. At the same time, it made you sick. You couldn't believe that the one who had caused you distress could have such a gentle touch.

"You're ready," Thanos had realized. The Other had appeared right before you and his fingertips were pressed against one another, making him look like he was deep in thought. You had no idea what they were doing, but the next thing you knew was that you no longer felt pain.

The chains, the strings, they were all invisible. It looked like you were free, but the weight of the metal was still pressed against your skin. Had you imagined it?

No,

Deep down you knew that the strings were still attached to you, but they had only made it seem like you had a choice.

"Excellent," The Other's voice surprised you. You merely blinked and you had returned to the vessel. Loki was above you and the Other was standing right there, "You found him."

The Other used his powers to push Loki off you. Shock had made your entire body numb and you couldn't scramble up to your feet. It felt like your limbs had been turned to stone and you were anchored to the floor.

Loki got up slowly with his arms raised in surrender. He was well aware of the powers the Other had and Loki wasn't going to fight him now. If he followed you for long enough, then maybe just maybe he could come up with a plan. Loki looked at you as you finally got up. As you stood next to the Other, you couldn't believe your legs carried you. Something was so wrong. You felt sick and you couldn't shake it off. It felt like something had snapped within you, but you didn't know what.

"He is waiting for you," The Other explained as he turned to walk away, most likely to wherever Thanos was waiting.

Loki had no choice but to follow, and you walked behind, making sure he didn't try to escape.

Why did Loki make you remember that? What did he think he would obtain with making you relive something so awful? It hadn't worked, right?

There he was. Thanos was standing by a hole that had been ripped into the side of the ship. Magic was keeping it sealed so the vacuum of space wouldn't suck everyone into it. But still, the emptiness of space wasn't frightening at all compared to the titan who was standing right there.

Loki swallowed thickly as he saw him again. It had been years but he remembered everything like it had happened yesterday. Seeing Thanos standing in the middle of the piles of bodies, in the room that smelled like smoke and blood, was sickening. Thanos hadn't just killed a part of Loki. He had just slaughtered these innocent Asgardians with the help of his so-called children. He had taken you.

He will make you long for something as sweet as pain

Loki closed his eyes and took a deep, shaky breath. They had stayed true to their threats.

"I know what it’s like to lose," Thanos turned around now that he knew Loki was there. At long last. Thanos had not forgotten what Loki had failed to do, and Thanos was a man of his words.

"To feel so desperately that you’re right yet to fail, nonetheless," Thanos continued dramatically and slowly made his way closer to Loki. He saw Thor on the ground, bloodied and weak. The brother of Loki. As tempting as the idea was to torture Thor right in front of the god of mischief, Thanos had different plans. If there was only one way Loki would ever give him the tesseract, it was going to be in order to save you. You were Loki's true weakness.

"It’s frightening. Turns the legs to jelly. I ask you, to what end?" Thanos looked Loki right in the eye. He could see that Loki was afraid, yet Loki never looked away from him. He was either too proud or fearless. Thanos had liked that about Loki initially. But he had failed Thanos greatly. It had cost him infinity stones.

"Dread it. Run from it. Destiny arrives all the same. And now, it’s here. Or should I say I am," Thanos finished his dramatics because it was time for action, to turn the wheels and see the bigger picture. This was the end of an era and a new beginning for a different universe. In Thanos' mind, only he could bring balance and order. He gestured for you to walk up to his side.

Too afraid of the idea of what would happen if you disobeyed, you walked right up to Thanos, feeling like a fly that was willingly flying into cobwebs. When you were close enough, you kneeled and dipped your head so he wouldn't see the worry in your eyes. It wasn't there before.

"I didn't obtain the tesseract from him, but I am sure that he has it, father," You muttered quietly. Why did you say that? There was a pounding headache growing within your skull. You didn't know what was right or wrong anymore and you couldn't fight it either.

Father

Loki clenched his jaw as he followed the situation closely. Hearing that made his blood boil. He wanted to rip Thanos apart after this. Never in a million years had he imagined this, to see you pledge your alliance to Thanos, kneeling before him and respecting him. Thanos didn't deserve that. Hell, Thanos didn't even deserve to look at you. It was wrong.

At that moment, Loki worried that his trick hadn't worked. That the memories hadn't awakened anything within you. That it was all too late now. This was the end, the one thing in life that was inevitable.

"I know, my child," Thanos let out a sigh. Then he grabbed you by your jaw like he had done before, forcing you to face him. "I know he has it," He repeated and suddenly his touch turned violent. He closed his hand around your neck tightly and you gasped for air helplessly. Your hands - tiny compared to his - grabbed his fingers and you tried to pry them apart, but he was tougher than you. Panic shot through your entire body when you realized you couldn't breathe. It turned your blood to ice and your poor heart was beating so hard you were afraid it would explode.

What was he doing?

The moment he pulled you to your feet, so high that you had to stand on the tips of your toes, he spoke, "The tesseract or her life," Thanos smiled devilishly, showing no remorse. He didn't care about you. You were a pawn in his game and if you would die at his feet, he would just walk over you and carry on.

"You choose," Thanos put the weight of the world on Loki's shoulders.

Loki wanted to rescue you from that monster, but he wasn't stupid. With all of Thanos' children surrounding him, he knew that he would be dead before he could reach you. Nonetheless, it didn't mean he wouldn't try. Seeing you clawing at Thanos' hand, fighting for something as simple as air and not getting it was heartbreaking. Loki's body was trembling with hatred and hurt. Tears blurred his vision and he struggled to keep his composure.

How had it all come to this?

The thought of Thanos with the tesseract was haunting. Soon he would have all the stones and he would destroy reality as they knew it. But Loki could live with that. He couldn't live knowing you had died when he had a chance to save you. Perhaps he was selfish for choosing you over the entire galaxy, but Loki didn't care. Nothing mattered if he would lose you again.

"Alright, stop!" Loki made up his mind. "I choose her," Finally, Thanos released his grip on you and let you fall on the cold ground. Your hands wrapped around your throat gently and you coughed painfully. It took you a while to finally breathe again, which was a huge relief for both Loki and you.

And now Loki was holding the tesseract. It was so bright that it painted the space blue. It was almost too bright to look at. The power within the stone was so strong, you could sense it like heat from the sun in spring after a long and cold winter. Loki was tempted to use the tesseract to grab you and escape, but he quickly shut those thoughts away. Thanos would follow him for the end of all days.

"You...you really are the worst, brother," Thor was following the situation to the best of his abilities. He spat out blood as he watched Loki holding the cube. It made him sad. Everything they ever knew was destroyed in the name of power, pure and raw power that the tesseract could offer. Was it worth it?

Loki glanced at Thor who was too weak to even get up. He didn't care too much about what he had to say. Then he looked at you. There you were, on the ground struggling to breathe after Thanos had crushed your windpipe. There was bruising on your skin that would only deepen with time. Time that you possibly wouldn't have after this.

He saw the tears running down your face, but you didn't sob and whimper. It seemed like you were as still as stone. You couldn't bring yourself to face Loki.

"I assure you," Loki found his voice and he addressed both you and Thor with his words, "the sun will shine on us again."

What did he mean by that?

You were ashamed to tilt your gaze to see him, to see the tesseract. The damn infinity stone had ruined it all! It was why Thanos had wrecked Loki, why he had destroyed you too. Why so many people were now dead. If you had one wish that could come true, you would wish for the tesseract to be destroyed forever.

Thanos had his back turned to you. Loki was slowly but surely making his way closer to the titan, almost like he was afraid to move but he forced his body to comply. Why? Why would he trade the tesseract for your life? It seemed like whatever spell you had been under had worn off. You were free, but it was more terrifying than being under Thanos' control under these circumstances. He didn't need you, and soon enough the vessel would be blown to bits. All of you, even Loki.

Would you be able to tell him how sorry you were?

"Your optimism is misplaced, Asgardian," Thanos wasn't fond of Loki's strange choice of words.

"Well for one thing I'm not Asgardian," Loki replied quickly. It sounded a little bit witty, which was confusing. Where did the boost of confidence come from? Was he up to something?

"And for another," He continued dramatically. This time it was Thanos' turn to be confused.

"We have a Hulk."

Everything that happened after that happened so fast that you could hardly keep up with it. Loki dropped the tesseract and he leapt toward you. Thanos barely had time to turn around when a huge, green beast appeared out of nowhere and it seemed angry. It was eager to fight the titan.

Loki had you up on your feet in no time and the two of you ran away from the immediate danger. He led you to one of the many corridors on the vessel until no one could possibly see you. They were too distracted by the Hulk to even think about Loki and you. It wasn't until he was right in front of you that you could comprehend what was going on. He was kneeling on the floor and you were sat against the wall for support. Your hands were trembling so hard, it seemed like you were freezing up and you couldn't make it stop.

Loki had tricked Thanos.

He was relieved when you didn't fight him, yet he was unsure if it meant you were no longer under Thanos' control, or if you were simply too tired to fight.

He cupped your face gently and searched for answers in your expression. Back in the day, he had been able to read you like an open book.

You put your hands around his wrists and pulled him closer. You were desperate for the comfort he could bring in the midst of the living hell you were stuck in. How did he not hate you?

"I'm s- I'm sorry," You whimpered, finally cracking like a plate that had fallen on the floor. "I'm sorry."

"Shh, it's okay," Loki couldn't possibly let you apologize for what had happened. He was possibly the one person who understood exactly what you had gone through and what it was like to follow orders from that monster. There was not an ounce of judgement to be found in his heart.

What mattered now was that you were together again. You could come up with a plan, but you had to work fast. As much as Loki wanted to hold you and comfort you, to feel that you were real, he knew there wasn't enough time for that.

"We need to get off this thing," Loki's mind was running a marathon as he tried to come up with an escape plan.

"They're gonna blow it up," You explained, feeling how bad your lips were quivering as you spoke. The moment Thanos had what he came for, they would leave and destroy everything they'd leave behind.

Shivers ran down Loki's spine as he heard that. It only confirmed that you had to act quickly. Loki wasn't sure how long the Hulk could fight Thanos. Would they be able to rescue Thor? How much time did they have?

The blood in the wound you had caused on his face was beginning to dry. It looked gnarly and all you wanted was to make it all better. Knowing that you had hurt him made you sick with guilt.

"I'm sorry, Loki. I didn't w-want to fight you," You sniffled, breaking Loki's train of thought. For the first time, he felt lost. He didn't really know what to do. Were there any escape pods left?

"I know," Loki assured you. "I know that. I was in your shoes when I was on Midgard," He explained briefly, unaware whether or not you knew of it. Had Thanos talked about him to you?

A sense of impending doom weighed you two down. If this was the end, then at least you were together, right? You and Loki against the nine realms, you would face the end together if there wasn't another way out. Whenever you had pictured your final day, you had imagined something entirely different than this. You would be old together, with hundreds of stories of your shared life. You would be surrounded by people you cared about. It would be calm, the exact opposite of this.

"I love you," You needed to tell him that. Any moment could be your last. The world would cave in and you would be gone forever.

Loki hated how much that sounded like a farewell, but at the same time, it had been so long since he had last heard those three words, let alone from you. Perhaps it was sick and twisted, but it made him smile.

"I love you too," Loki was sure of it. He had never stopped loving you and he didn't think he was even capable of that.

It seemed like you acted on instinct. You found enough strength to push yourself right against Loki. There was no hesitation in your actions as you kissed him. Loki closed his eyes when he felt your trembling lips pressed against his. Your scent, still sweet and familiar despite it all, punched its way into his lungs. He held your face gently but the kiss was passionate, almost despairing.

You wanted to scream out in agony because at last, you were reunited with Loki but not in the way you imagined. You felt like the shell of the person you were before, and now you knew for a fact that Thanos had done the exact same things to Loki. That titan had killed your souls beyond repair. But all you could do was kiss Loki and hold him and hope that he could feel how sorry you were. You didn't want to let go, afraid that if you did, it would all end. Just like that.

Loki broke the kiss, and for a moment you rested your foreheads against one another like you had done so many times before. It was comforting. You both wanted to stay close like that, but you recognised that you couldn't. Letting go of each other and getting up on your weary feet was so incredibly difficult, but it had to be done.

The world around you began to glow brighter. You quickly held onto Loki, startled as the mysterious light surrounded the two of you.

Loki held his breath as he studied the warm glimmering magic that had swallowed you. In between the bright rays of light, he saw all the colours of the rainbow. Shimmering. He saw reds and blues, yellows and greens, shining brighter than the other and it changed smoothly.

The Bifrost

He didn't know how or why, but he knew for a fact that you were in the magical portal. He couldn't see beyond it anymore. He couldn't feel the floor beneath his feet. It was like he was levitating mid-air, with you tightly in his arms.

Heimdall must've conjured the forefathers, letting their powers flow through him one last time. Where to? Loki assumed that anywhere would be better than where they had been mere seconds ago.

And it was a miracle.

A/N: I think it would've made more sense for Heimdall to send Thor or Loki to earth rather than the Hulk. So that's why I ended it like that

I'd absolutely love to hear your feedback! <3

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