#but for the people that do I'm sure you can be normal about not liking it

[selfloverrrrrr]

Stalker gojo pls 🙏🏼

Stalker ~

Warnings : smut , heavy smut, unprotected sex, Noncon, Kidnapping, physically and emotional abuse, biting, size difference, Yandere Gojo, stalking, protective, jealous, obsessive, manipulative....

( All characters are aged up/18+)

Masterlist

Minors Do Not Interact

Read the warnings carefully....if you don't like my stories block me not report

I work in a cafe. I live alone in my apartment. My apartment was in an empty area. That's because that's the only appartment I got in my range. I don't have too much money to afford a good apartment .

Gojo Satoru was famous person in Tokyo. Everyone knows him. But nobody knows what he does. Is a good person or a bad person? Nobody knows. But everyone knows that he's a dengerous person. I also know his name. But never seen him. So how can I know he's stalking me...?

All of this started from the cafe. I was working. Suddenly the bell rang. I looked at the door. A tall handsome man entered. His eyes were blue, white hair. He was wearing a sunglass. His outfit was black. He came in and took a sit.

I went to his table and bow down."what would you like to have sir..?" I asked. "Nothing much... just a latte please " he replied with a charming smile. "Ok sir " I said and took his order. "And what's your name?" I asked. "Hmm?" He raised his eyebrows. "Your name....to write on the cup" I said. "Ohh... yeah.... it's Gojo Satoru " he replied. A beat skipped my heart as head his name. "Ok" I said and quickly went out of there.

I went in the maid counter. My hands were shaking. Did I just met and talked with Tokyo's most famous man?! Fuck I've heard that guy is scary... I shouldn't get too close to him. I thought. Then I bring him his order. "Here's your order sir" I said. "Oh... thanks" he replied with a smile.

That was the first time I saw him. Since then he was almost a regular coustomer. He came in the cafe almost two or three times in a week. He knew my name now. But I don't even try to get too close. I just do my work. Cause I don't want to get in any kind of trouble.

After few days... It was a normal day. Gojo came in cafe again. And he never ordered anything else... just latte. That was he's regular. So I don't even have to ask him his order. I bring him his order then went back to the counter. After finishing his latte he he went to pay the bill. "Here's the money" he said and handed me. " Thank you sir... please do come again" I said. "Umm...y/n... can I talk to you please?" He asked. "Sure" I replied. "I think you're really cute... can I have your number?" He asked with a smile. My heart skipped a beat. " I-i.... actually sir... I'm not interested... I'm s-sorry " I replied with shaking voice. His smile faded away. "Do you have any boyfriend?" He asked in serious tone. "N-No... it's not about having boy-" I was saying "do you like someone?" He cut me off with again his serious tone. "N-No " I replied. Suddenly his smile came back on his face. "It's okey...see you soon.... bye " he said. 'fuck I almost thought that he's gonna kill me' I thought. "B-bye sir"I replied.

Gojo's POV

I was walking on the road. I saw a cafe. I've never went to the cafe. I don't know what came in my mind I went in the cafe. I went to a empty table. A maid came to me. When I looked at her....GODDDDD!!!! IS SHE A FUCKING ANGEL?! She asked my name. She looked scared when she heard my name. I smirked at myself. Is she scared of me like those other peoples...? Well you don't have to be scared darling. I like you. I have fallen in love with you.... and when I tell myself something as mine... I make that mine...In. Any. Cost.

I have a great obsession with her. But never let anyone know that. Not anyone. I always stalk her everywhere.

I went to my room. I grabbed the door knob and opened it. I opened the door and went inside. I smirked at the view infront of me. That room's wall was full with y/n's pictures. Her pictures that I took every time I stalked her. I love her and I want her. I looked at the table in that room. I went to the laptop and opened it. I started playing all the footage of those cameras I set all over y/n's house. She's in her bathroom. I've seen her body so many times before. But God! I never get tired. "soon gonna feel that body, darling" I whispered.

A few days later. I went to the cafe again. Today I asked her for her number. But she rejected?! I asked her if she had a boyfriend or if likes someone. I know she doesn't but still I asked. She said no. I smiled. 'so she wants the hard way,huh?.... Fine!' I told myself and leave the cafe.

Y/n's POV

I just closed the cafe. It was dark at night and there was no one around to be seen. I was walking quietly when suddenly someone spoke. "I think its not good for a beautiful girl like you walk all alone at this hour. would you like me to take you home?" The voice said. When I looked beside me. It was Gojo.

He Smiled creepily at me as I notice a shadow of a knife on his hip. "Im a very gentleman person... you know and you don't need to be scared of me. Im just trying to help you get home." He said. My heart was pounding. I know he's a dengerous man... and I really don't want any trouble. "T-T-Thank you.....but I don't n-need your help" I said as I tried to walk first.

He starts to approach me. "So you rather choose walking alone than come with me? Dont you think you will be a easy target for someone to attack?" He said. I looked at the knife in his pocket. "Oh the knife..? Are you scared of that???" He said as he pulled out the knife from his pocket and threw it on the road. " I don't need any knife to have you " he said. And I looked at him confusedly. He suddenly put a cloth on my mouth and dragged me in his car.

When my eyes open again I was in my bedroom. But there wasn't any clothes on me. I started panicking. I looked beside me then I saw Gojo infront of me. He was taking off his clothes. I was about to get off the bed when Gojo grabbed my hand and pulled me harshly towards him. My back was on the bed and he climbed on top of me. " Where do you think you are going....huh??? " He said with a smirk. his hand slowly reaching up from my inner thigh. " Why don't you just relax darling..." he said and his hand reached my core. He pushed his middle and ring finger inside and started thursting in and out. "G-gojo stop" I moaned loudly. "Oh... You liked that?" He smirked at me.

He started thursting his finger in and out harshly. Looking at me and smiling like a psycho which make me froze in fear. "You like getting fucked by me right???? That's why you are squeezing my fingers like that!" He whispered in my ear. "S-stop....p-please.." I begged. He looked at me again. He paused his fingers. "Why did you rejected me huh? Do you know how much I love you? I stalked you everywhere you go.... I've cameras all over your house...I loveed you these much and you rejected me???...If I got you pragnent then you can't resist me right???!!!!" He said in a low voice.

"N-no.... n-no.... I don't want that... please" I begged him. He didn't even listen to me. I tried to push his chest but nothing. Gojo started licking on my nipple. He was being a tease. I moaned. He continued his teasing licking and sucking on my nipple. With his one hand he grabbed my other boob and squeezed it roughly. I scremed so loudly.

I tried to get off from the bed but he grabbed my leg and pulled me again in that place. He grabbed his dick stroked it two or three times then line it with my entrence. I began to panic. "Gojo Gojo .... please no .... G-gojo please no... Don't do this again please!!!" I begged him and tears started falling from my eyes but he didn't listen. "Call me Satoru.... You should call me by the first name, baby" he said kissing my cheeks.

Gojo pushed his whole length in one slide and I scremed with pain. He didn't even give me time to adjust his size and started thursting in and out roughly. I was screming loudly. His huge dick was giving me too much pain. He started giving me hickeys on my neck and chest. His thursting getting faster and harder. "This .... This is mine.... I wouldn't.... I wouldn't let anyone take it from me!!!!" He said between moans. My whole body was shaking. He was moaning too. The way his dick was touching my g-spot make my back arch. It didn't take much time and I came. As I came that smirk again played on his lips.

He was still thursting roughly. I felt his cock pulsing inside me. I tried to push him away with all of my strength." Ughh...no no no no...ahhhhhh...no please no....ahhhhhh..... n-not ahhhh.....not inside... please" I begged him. He grabbed my throat and chocked me down to the bed. Within a minute he came inside me I could feel his seed inside me. He pulled out and whispered in my ear with a smirk "I'm sure.... you'll be carrying my child". He whispered and fall beside me taking deep breaths.

" You are mine and just fucking mine. Don't ever dare to think of anyone else for a moment. Or else you know damn well what I'm gonna do." He whispered in my ear.

Give me your requests guys....

I love when you give me your requests 💕

#jjk #jjk smut #smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #tw noncon #fem reader #gojo satoru #jjk gojo #jujutsu gojo #gojo x reader #gojou satoru x reader #gojo smut #gojo somnophilia #gojo noncon #stalker #Stalker Gojo #yandere jujutsu kaisen #yandere gojo #yandere #obbsessive #obssesive #possessive #dark content #dark blog #dark romance

[spacebarbarianweird]

Okay so I know you're a big Dadstarion fan. So what do you think of Astarion and Gnome! Tav having a baby. (I'm not sure if it is quite possible given the size difference but let's say it is.) I couldn't help but start thinking about Astarion and a teeny tiny gnome baby the other day. Doing headcanons for this would be interesting I think 🤔

OK, so, I did some research. Apparently, there is a half-official sex guide that says that gnomes don't mate with elves. But there are no breeding rules at all. So, people suppose that unless it's human x elf or human x orc, the mixed kid just ends up inheriting one of their parents' race (so in this case Astarion will probably have a gnome kid whose elven ancestry will manifest in some minor details).

When I write fantasy I usually stay firm on biology issues (some races can have mixed kids, and some can't have kids at all coz they are different species - so they can just fuck without contraception which is good), but it doesn't have to be the common rule at all.

Masterlist

Headcanons The image of Astarion's daughter is inspired by Leroy van Vliet from Art Station (I love the ears)

So, you actually were sure it wasn't possible to make kids.

He is a vampire and he is an elf.

Gnomes don't mate with elves, that's for sure!

Do they?

Right?

When you find out you are pregnant, it's the worst time in your relationship.

You are afraid you don't remember being assaulted. Astarion blames you for infidelity.

Then, you are just afraid you can't carry a bigger child without consequences (elven kids are small that's for sure but not small enough for a gnome).

You often quarrel till you end up in tears. Once to twice you hit his knees with all the strength you have while insulting him in gnim.

But to your surprise, pregnancy goes... normal.

You go into labor when it's due and give birth to a gnome, just like you and all your relatives.

But with very familiar silver hair.

A gnome with elven ancestry, that's how it's called.

Astarion feels uneasy holding such a small child. She looks like a toy in his hands.

But the girl grows up looking very similar to Astarion - his facial features, his nose, his hair color, his crafty hands.

Just a different race.

Astarion jokingly calls her his pocket princess since she is small enough to be put in a bag when he needs to go somewhere.

Often, when Astarion takes a job helping an unfortunate person with shitty supernatural contracts, people can notice a little gnome looking out of her father's traveling sack.

"Here, princess, have an apple - daddy is busy"

And the little gnome keeps chewing an apple while looking at the world with her big green eyes.

As she grows, her mixed ancestry shows off.

She is way taller than other gnomes. 4 feet tall! A giantess!

Thanks to that she easily wears armor crafted by gnomes and the swords are all light to her.

But there is some miscommunication since Astarion subconsciously believes his gnome daughter is a baby when she isn't.

She is short, but ferocious and gorgeous- and you know that at least five young gnomes (three girls and two boys) can't take their eyes off her.

Outsiders sometimes assume she is an elf though bigger palms and a weird shape of ears betray her true nature.

Sometimes Astarion misses the days when he could fit his daughter into a pocket or a bag because now she is an adult who fights monsters and dates humans (because she has daddy issues and a thing for tall men).

But he still can carry her around, placing her on his shoulder while she gets angry for "being treated like that".

She actually doesn't mind. There are not many people who dare pick her up.

@tugoslovenka  

@herstxrgirl 

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@vixstarria 

@not-so-lost-after-all  

@marcynomercy  

@theearthsfinalconfession 

@starlight-ipomoea    

@micropoe10 

@astarion-imagine-archive  

@veillsar

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@dajeong

@wilteddreamsofbaldursgate

#spacebarbarian headcanon #astarion #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 astarion #bg3 #astarion romance #astarion bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #astarion headcanon #astarion headcanons #astarion x tav #astarion x you #astarion x reader #tav x astarion #astarion x f!tav #dnd gnome #gnomes #gnome #dadstarion #half-gnomes

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Reckoner: Final Part

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.3k

Summary: Your world is turned upside down when you get in trouble for something you didn't even do. The entire team is in uproar over this but Hotch says he will take care of it. Can he? Or are you doomed to live out the rest of your days in misery?

Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there are any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them.

x

Thankfully, the team has the current case to keep them occupied so they don't think about you, but Spencer doesn't have that outlet. He's stuck in Penelope's office forced to think about you, what you might be going through, how you must be feeling, and how he can't do anything about it. He's bouncing his leg up and down rapidly because his anxiety is spiking. He would bite his nails if they hadn't already been bitten down to the nub.

"Spence, why don't you take a walk? I'm sure it'll do good to clear your head," Penelope suggests.

"No, thanks."

She sighs and turns back to the computer screens before calling Rossi. She's been working hard on her end to try and figure out who The Planner is.

"What do you have?" Rossi answers.

"I've concentrated on the last three cases because they left the freshest e-prints. However, over a hundred thousand cases pass through the Long Island Court."

"Who had eyes on the files?"

"Literally hundreds of people."

"Change track. Focus on The Enforcer. Look at mob-related murder trials on Long Island over the last ten years. We're looking for a hitman."

Penelope types quickly and comes up with a shorter list, albeit still long.

"There are over ninety-three mob trials in the last ten years."

"Put aside any trials that resulted in a conviction. Weed out mistrials and arraignments."

"Nineteen."

"Were any of those on trial suspected of being hitmen or enforcers?"

"Three, but I got something else here. Tony Mecacci's case was judged a mistrial but check out his suspected victim."

She sends over the file immediately so they can look it over. His victims are the same as the team's current victims. All were shot in the same style as the ones on the file.

".22 caliber, right?"

"Bulls-eye."

"Cross-match our profile of The Planner against all those connected with this trial."

Penelope continues to type as she speaks.

"Let's see here. We have prosecuting lawyer Garret Daniels, Judge Boyd Schuller, criminal defense lawyer Paul--"

"Wait, did you say Judge Shuller?" Rossi cuts her off.

"Yeah, I'm sending over a photo."

Rossi waits for the photo to come through so he can confirm whether or not he knows this person. He does.

"What's wrong?" Hotch asks. "Do you know him?"

"No, but I knew his wife. Two years ago, she was driving home from work and was killed by a drunk driver."

"That could be the tragedy."

"She was the love of his life, that's for sure."

Penelope digs into the Judge's life to see what kind of dirty secrets he has.

"Twelve months ago, Judge Shuller took a leave of absence due to health issues. He was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He has six months to live. That's when the killings started."

"You don't seriously think Judge--"

"Judge Schuller is the planner. Yes, I do," Rossi cuts off the detective. "It fits the profile, and Tony Mecacci is most likely Bosola the Enforcer. What have you got on Bosola?"

"He went off the grid after his last trial," Penelope answers.

"JJ put out a statewide APB and release Mecacci's photo to the media," Hotch orders, and she leaves to do it.

"Judge Schuller's a highly-respected man. We can't just walk in there and accuse him of serial murder."

"Then I'll go to the attorney general and petition the Chief Justice if I have to."

Rossi looks behind Hotch to see Judge Schuller walk right into the police station as if he knew the team was talking about him.

"Maybe not."

"I believe you're looking for me," the Judge says.

Judge Schuller is taken to an interrogation room to be questioned by Rossi and Derek.

"You know we have to advise you of your rights," Derek says and sits across from him.

"I waive my constitutional rights against self-incrimination."

"When you walked in here, you said, 'I believe you're looking for me'."

"Yes."

"Your timing was impeccable, but how could you know that?"

"I knew it wouldn't take you long to find me. Not after what I've left behind."

"So, you don't deny any of this?" Derek asks.

"Why would I? What you see as a crime, I see as justice."

"Ray Finnegan was a friend of mine," Rossi glares.

"Ray Finnegan was a criminal. You should choose your friends more wisely."

"It must have really thrown you when Ray showed up at Emma's funeral."

This pisses Judge Schuller off, and he slams his hands angrily onto the table.

"How do you know about my wife?"

"You have absolutely no idea who I am, do you?"

Ray told Rossi that everyone only meets Bosola once. That means Judge Schuller had to have given Bosola a list of names. He would never have to meet him again, just to make final payments on proof of death which he can send electronically. If anyone can get into Schuller's personal files and financial record, it would be Penelope. She has to do it quickly before everything gets shut down.

Detective Gill made a call to Schuller's office a few hours ago and told them they had two suspects, which means he knows what the police know. Schuller knows the FBI is onto him, which means he didn't come here for a confession. He has a list, and there is more to come.

He came here to stall.

"Can we just get on with what I came here for?" Judge Schuller sighs.

"Why? So Bosola can go on and carry on whatever it is you asked him to do? No. You call him and you end this," Derek says.

"Even if I could, I wouldn't."

"She was born Emma Louise Taylor on the 4th of July, 1958," Rossi reminisces.

"You could get that from anywhere," Schuller glares at Rossi.

"When she was six, her dad bought her a black and white homeless kitten."

"No, if she knew you, she would have told me."

"She named it Oscar," Rossi continues, "after Oscar Wilde. Out of all of Oscar's work, she loved an ideal husband the most."

The judge is getting angrier by the minute the longer Rossi talks about his wife.

"I don't know how you know all of this about Emma or what you hope to achieve, but we're done. You know the charges. Charge me."

"Is that what started all this insanity? Emma's death?"

"What started all of this was the thirty-five years I had to sit and watch as the system I swore an oath to protect failed the very people our justice system was meant to protect!"

"I wonder what Emma would make of all this."

"Every single person on that list deserves justice, and it's justice they managed to evade," Schuller shouts.

"So, you do have a list?" Rossi smirks.

"I'm finished talking."

Rossi and Derek continue to work over Judge Schuller while Emily is in another room talking to Penelope over video chat. Spencer isn't in the room because she managed to convince him to take a lap or two around the building to clear his head or try to.

"Hey, where's Spence? How is he doing?" Emily asks when she notices the lack of Spencer's presence.

"He's not doing too good. He doesn't have the hands-on work like you guys have to keep him distracted. It's killing him knowing Y/N's in jail for something she didn't do."

"Yeah, I know. It's hard on us, too. We don't talk about it but I know we're all thinking about it. Hotch will fix it once we're back, I know it."

"Yeah, me too."

"So, what did you find out about Judge Schuller?"

"We've got loads of two-way traffic going on, which means someone is trying to bounce us out."

"Okay, Bosola doesn't come cheap, so Judge Schuller had to have made some pretty substantial transactions."

"I've got wire transfers to a Cayman Island bank, and that's where the trace ends."

"How many and how much?"

"In June, he debits numerations of nine thousand, nine hundred, and ninety-nine dollars every few days four separate times. Then, he takes a break for a few weeks until he makes his final transaction for the same magic number. Anything less than ten thousand dollars keeps the IRS off your trail."

"So, the final payment must be for proof of death. That makes fifty-thousand dollars the price of a kill."

"He did that three times over a period of twelve months, but two days ago, he raised his account for a hundred thousand dollars all in one hit. He also closed all his accounts and handed his entire estate over to a victim's support group." Penelope gasps in shock and groans in frustration. "Someone who isn't suffering from too many brainiacs in the high-tech kitchen just bounced us out."

"Good job," Emily praises and hangs up. She returns to Hotch to tell him her findings. "If our calculations are correct, there are two more names on that list."

"There are."

Hotch replays the footage from the interrogation from when Emily was on the phone with Penelope.

"Every single person on that list deserves justice," Judge Schuller says and looks at his watch yet again.

"He said deserves, not deserved. Look right there. He looks at his watch for the second time. Whatever he's waiting for is about to happen."

"I don't think you knew Emma at all," Rossi continues to antagonize him. "At least not the one I knew. I made an excuse for myself that I wouldn't be welcome at her funeral. The truth is, I couldn't face it."

"You knowing Emma changes nothing."

"Oh, but it does. Emma changed the lives of everyone she knew, but at least Ray and I saw her death for what it truly was--a tragic accident."

"Dan Patton was drunk. He murdered Emma as surely as if he put a gun to her head!" Judge Schuller yells.

"Is that why his photo's not here? You're saving the best for last? How many other people have you targeted? I want the truth."

"I have nothing more to say."

"I do. I ran into Emma a few years ago at a hotel in Manhattan. I was working on a case and so was she. I knew she was married, but I didn't care."

Judge Schuller knows what Rossi is implying and he refuses to accept that his wife was cheating on him.

"No, she wouldn't... Emma would not do that to me. You're lying."

"Am I?"

"I want the truth."

"You first."

The Judge sighs knowing he's cornered and decides to give it up.

"Dan Patton is the last one. There are no more. Now, tell me the truth."

"That night in Manhattan, she told me our connection was so strong that it could never happen only once, and I was fine with that."

Rossi leaves with a smirk on his face, and the judge is shocked. He shakes his head and looks at Derek who is still seated.

"At least you now know what kind of man you're working with."

"What kind of man are you?"

"I've had enough of seeing the guilty walk free of their sins."

"What about your sins?"

"I got cancer for mine."

Emily, Hotch, and Detective Gil went to Dan's apartment after checking the police department he works for. Turns out Bosola got to him before the FBI could. They found him with two bullet holes, one in the heart and one in the head, but also beaten to death. Bosola is nowhere to be found because he killed him and left immediately after like a professional hitman.

There's no way Bosola is getting off Long Island since the FBI has all ports, roads, and airports guarded to make sure he doesn't get away. Judge Schuller is being moved somewhere safer because he is a high-court judge, which makes this a federal case now. The FBI is taking over this one before more people get killed. If Dan is dead, then the judge's list is complete.

However, something isn't adding up.

The Judge gave away his entire estate and all his money, and he closed out his accounts and paid off his utility bills. He has cancer but he has six months left to live. Why would he pay off his bills now and give away everything he owns? Not to mention the one hundred thousand dollar payment for not one but two more kills. If Dan was killed, then there should be one more.

Usually, the judge waits for confirmation of death before sending the payment, but he knew he wasn't going to be around to see this last proof of death. He sent everything over because he was not making it ten feet out of the police station.

Bosola has one more kill to make before moving on to another client, and it's Judge Schuller himself. With a crowd of reporters and a bunch of bystanders, it's easy for him to blend into the crowd. He managed to shoot Schuller in the heart and escape without anyone seeing him.

Case closed. With that major distraction out of the way, everyone is now focused on you and your situation. No one has said a word or talked about it since Hotch arrived in Long Island, but he's been making calls since getting on the plane to figure out what he can do to help you out.

The first person to get back to him is the lawyer that your dad snagged for you. He got ahold of his contact information and asked nicely to be let into the loop since he is your boss.

"Steven? Did you hear anything?" Everyone knows what Hotch is talking about so they stop what they're doing and listen to his side of the conversation. Hotch looks visibly upset which isn't a good sign. "Are you sure? ... There's nothing you can do for her? ... What about bail? ... Is there anything I can do? ... Okay. I appreciate you calling me. Thanks."

"What did he say?" Derek is the first to ask.

Hotch looks down and tries to keep the anger and frustration off his face as much as he can. When he feels he's neutral, he looks up and addresses the team.

"Y/N is being transferred to Virginia Correctional Center for Women in Goochland awaiting trial and bail. He said they have everything they need to convict her, and it's not looking good. Whoever did this really wants her to suffer for it."

Everyone is sent into silence because no one can believe this.

"I have always found that mercy bears richer fruit than strict justice." - Abraham Lincoln

x

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#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fluff #criminal minds angst #criminal minds series rewrite #criminal minds season 5

[arcadekitten]

I don't know if this will make sense but mareggie is such a comfort of mine, esp with the fact it doesn't like, focus on the suggestive parts most people expect from a relationship.. idk if that makes sense but as a demiaroace person I love your works

Thank you so much, I'm so happy you feel that way! ♡

They are a big comfort for me too, as I'm sure anyone could see! I'm happy I made the decision to have them both be asexual and not only is it comforting but I think it is something that can be important too (as you are displaying to me right now, by telling me they bring you comfort!)

My world is a bit of an ace fantasy anyways where no one is even capable of getting sexual to begin with, but even within that context Mary and Reginald are both such completely non-sexual characters and I like that about them. Their relationship is one that holds no sexual connotations to it within the context of their world and even within context of the real world/metaphors/anything like that.

And I don't want to sound like a dunce or anything when I say things like that. I know that asexuality is a spectrum and that being asexual doesn't inherently make someone non-sexual. But both Mary and Reginald are characters who ARE both asexual and non-sexual and that is important to both of their characters and the story I'm telling between them.

While part of the reason Mary and Reginald are like that is for my own self-indulgence of the kind of media I had always wanted to see(as an ace person myself) I hope that maybe they can also open the eyes of others for what a romantic relationship can be like. That romance does not always contain sexual undertones. That forms of attraction do not always have blurred lines. And maybe they can challenge themselves to explore ideas of intimacy and love and closeness in ways that do not involve anything sexual in nature at all, because they're just as normal and meaningful as ideas that do.

And also, that asexual people can have stories+romances in which they are the main characters and it's stories that are (hopefully!) exciting and fun and engaging and dramatic and nerve-wracking and suspenseful, just like other romances that came before them. My stories might not be for everyone but they do fill a niche and it makes me happy to know that people both in and out of that niche can appreciate Mary and Reginald and their romance for what it is ♡

Anyways that's me rambling again but thank you for giving me the opportunity to!

#hope this doesnt come off like self-serving or anything #like i think my work is soooo important and if i didnt do it no one would or anything #but im here and im doing it to be the change i want to see in the world #and im happy if others can find comfort in it too #mareggie #mary #mary anta #reginald #reginald tetra #reggie #reply

[crimeronan]

Camila horror thoughts. In the horrifically fraught family horrors sense of the term.

What if Vee has specifically warned Camila about Hunter, told her all about what he specifically has done in order to give her a heads up, in a way naturally coloured by the views she has (not unreasonably) built up around Hunter because of all the stuff she's done.

So naturally she's got this wariness of Hunter that does not compute when she sees how genuinely caring he is with Luz even if logically she knows people can act remarkably differently in different contexts and none of it negates all the stuff he did with The Basilisks for Belos. But Camila is still pretty sure that Luz doesn't know, and is terrified that if she knew it might destroy something that she is desperately reliant on, her relationship with Hunter. It probably wouldn't, Luz could probably live with that since well horrible nightmare trauma soulmates and by Luz's standards she's done just as bad in a similar context but Camila and Luz keeping secrets for almost the exact same reason (to protect the people they love from horrors they are too insane to be affected by) appeals to me.

But the problem now arises, Camila's told Luz that she has adopted another kid, and Luz in the spirit of trying her best to reach out does want to see Vee or have her visit with Camila next time she comes or something like that since like, thats a normal thing to do on reconnecting with your estranged mother and finding out you have an adopted sister you've never met.

Vee, bless is not going along with that "don't tell Luz how horrible Hunter is since she is hopelessly codependent on him" bullshit at all. Camila knows that, Vee knows that. Camila knows she cannot ethically or reasonably expect Vee to not spill all of Hunter's darkest secrets to Luz in an attempt to ruin his life since, y'know all the stuff he did to her specifically.

For Vee the nicest most compromise-y thing she can do, is just never meet Luz face to face, and thats only because of her respect for Camila. But there's no way Luz isn't going to to notice or be concerned about this so there's this constant ticking time bomb of "when am i gonna meet Vee' since "oh she's off at college" isn't gonna work forever.

god this is all so good. i've been thinking about it since you sent this ask a few hours ago now. bc like. god. there's So Much....

i think you're 100% right that vee would try to stay out of things. she's like mama respectfully i'm ready to meet her IF i'm allowed to scream a lot of pent-up utterly unhinged bullshit but otherwise i think it's best for me not to be involved.

and camila is SUCH a bad liar. if she tried to say that things were fine with vee, luz would clock that something was wrong immediately. she obviously wouldn't jump to "she's from the isles" when there are so many more obvious conclusions -- maybe vee is jealous of luz for being the first daughter camila loved, maybe she's angry at luz for running away, maybe she's sick of luz monopolizing camila's time now when vee is used to having their mom all to herself....

regardless of what luz thinks is most likely, she's definitely like. Ah. I Am Driving A Wedge Between Them. This Is My Fault. On A Personal Level. Somehow.

and then on camila's end, that's even true to a point.... bc vee is getting increasingly more upset by the idea of protecting luz's feelings. i can absolutely see a very tired vee finally having the stress get to her & snapping, "why do you think she'll CARE?? she isn't going to care. even if she's as nice a person as you think she is, it's not like i'm a human or a witch. i'm nothing. she doesn't know how to care about people like me"

...there is, of course, a delicious and vicious irony in that. like. luz Very Much Does Know how to care about someone who isn't a witch or a human.

Oh God.

and then whenever luz meets vee, when it all finally Does come out.... i feel like it would sort of be worse for vee than anything she'd actually braced for. because luz DOES immediately care, she does act like it matters, she immediately wants to know everything and fix everything and make it all better, she immediately takes on all of the responsibility for everything the empire's ever done, she's so sorry, she didn't know, she would have done something, she can do something now--

--and vee is like well. HE knew. and he sure didn't want to help me!! even though i asked him to!! even though he KNEW WHAT THEY WERE DOING TO ME THE ENTIRE TIME

hunter has wisely remained quiet because he doesn't think he can really defend himself here. and luz has this moment of uncertainty and confusion, and then she looks at hunter's face, and for a second vee thinks that he's just going to straight-up deny it, but he doesn't. and luz seems to understand that it's all true.

and she doesn't look angry. or even betrayed.

and then she's trying to tell vee that hunter was always in danger when they were growing up, that there must have been extenuating circumstances that made rescue impossible, that he would have helped her if he could, that luz KNOWS he would have because he wouldn't just leave vee to suffer for no reason, that's not the kind of person he is,

and hunter is the one to be like luz. stop. she doesn't need to hear that right now. she can hate me. it's fine.

so vee's opinions on luz are like. 1) i hate that you're so nice that i look insane for being angry with you 2) you're a spineless coward who can't hold anyone accountable 3) you've fooled camila into thinking you're some helpless delicate flower by pretending to be sad when you DON'T care 4) if hunter is going to agree with me about anything then i should legally get to shoot him. just like once. i've never touched a gun or had any inclination to do so before today But I Should Get To Shoot Him .

camila's role in mediating this has mainly been to gently steer the conversation into more productive territory when it looks like it might devolve into panic attacks or violence from anyone involved. she's so fucking stressed by trying to keep things from coming to blows that there's like. no Way that she could do a professional-level job of Family Therapy Mediator.

god.

much 2 consider.

#MESSYYYY. #havent reread this but hopefully it is coherent. vibes. #replies #toh #princess luz au #camila noceda #vee noceda #luz noceda #hunter toh #horrible mindscape trauma pals #long post

[eloqiu]

top 11 hardest bad abilities to discover (not listed in order)

(might contain some spoilers)

Dazai (No Longer Human). To begin with, my man had to find someone with a ability. (Probably like, 1/1,000,000 people) And then touch them, if Dazai was a normal guy, and not the demon prodigy, he 100% wouldn't have known he had this ability

Yosano (Thou Shalt Not Die). How'd she even discover this? There's very few scenarios where someone would be half dead, and I doubt that any normal person would be able to discover that they had a ability like this. There's still a chance, but it's very small.

Fitzgerald (The Great Fitzgerald). Imagine, you're a middle class man, normal life, normal income, nothing crazy about your life. How the hell do you find out you become stronger when you spend money. We've seen Fitzgerald not activate his ability when he causally spends, how the hell did you activate it then???

Muishitaro (The Perfect Crime). I- How does a normal person, commit enough crimes to find out that, no they're not getting away with these crimes because they're lucky, they're actually using a ability that erases their crime.

Ace (Madness of the Jewel Kings). Could just be a me thing but, I don't think I've ever met someone with debt slaves. Much less anyone who can convert their debt slaves lifespan into jewels. You either gotta be insane, or have plot armor to find out about this ability

Mark Twain (Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer). You have to be fucking enlisted to find out you have this ability, because there's no way a normal person's gonna have a sniper with them (unless you're in the United States.... Wait-)

Fukuzawa (All Men are Created Equal). This is the same logic as Dazai, there's probably not that many ability users, as you'd have to collect enough ability users to realize "oh, my subordinates get full control over their abilities", also what qualifies as the agencies entrance exam? Is it even necessary?

Pushkin (A Feast in Time of Plague). How the hell do you manage to "coincidentally" find out that you have an ability that affects 2 people with a virus, and that if one of those 2 people don't die, both the people will die from having their organs eaten. You have to be insane or a serial killer to find that ability.

Yukito (Another). I'm genuinely curious on how many mysteries this guy had to solve to be able to find out that the killer in the mysteries always, 100%, without fail, dies after the mysterys been solved. That is extremely and annoyingly specific.

Kajii (Lemon). The whole ass reason I made this post, who the fuck is "conveniently" creating lemon shaped bombs, there's no way he found out this ability through normal means. Was one of his friends a terrorist with a lemon kink? Because that's the only reasonable explanation that he's finding out this ability. Either that or, he's got a big food kink and makes bombs shaped as food during his spare time. There's no fucking way, a normal guy with an office job is finding out they have an ability like that. Atsushi's the main character? Nah, this man has way more plot armor. Because the stars, universe, solar system, and plantes had to align for him to find out about his ability

Ranpo (✨Ultra Deduction✨) please help im being threatened . I mean, he could always be a genius or whatever but... Sure.

#bsd ranpo #bsd yosano #bsd dazai #Bsd lemon guy #bsd fukuzawa #bsd kajii #Bsd ace #Bsd yukito #Bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs dazai #dazai osamu #yosano akiko #bungou stray dogs yosano #fukuzawa yukichi #president fukuzawa #bungo stray dogs fukuzawa #guild bsd #fitzgerald bsd #mark twain #bsd mark twain #abilities #There's no way people are finding out about these abilities #what do you mean? I'm not being threatened by ranpo

[cbk1000]

So, I have another crazy story about the clinic where I used to work; this time as a patient instead of an employee. Under a cut because it's very long.

So back when I first got really sick, I was in the hospital a few times primarily for really high heart rate. I work out a lot and my normal resting heart rate is in the 60s; back in February I suddenly started getting palpitations, and my heart rate was going up to like 140 bpm just standing at my bathroom sink washing my face. I wore a seven day monitor at one point and my highest recorded heart rate on that was 157 bpm--just shuffling like a zombie around the house. I was also super weak and just felt overall like death.

Hospital runs a bunch of labs and imaging tests and can't find anything that would explain it. The last doc I saw said there was a bright spot on my echocardiogram monitor that could just be flashback from the monitor, but taken with some of my symptoms, he felt OK with a presumptive diagnosis of pericarditis (inflammation of the sac around your heart), especially as the treatment is just high dose ibuprofen for a week, nothing invasive or drastic. I need to follow up with a cardiologist, but I don't have a primary care physician who can refer me to the heart clinic. I had just turned in new patient paperwork at a local clinic so I contacted them to see if I could get in, but they said it would likely be a month before I could be scheduled with anyone.

In the meantime, the ibuprofen isn't working and my condition is getting worse. I have my next period, and after a couple of heavy days, I get even weaker, my heart rate goes even higher, and I get really dizzy all the time. I also am now short of breath just rolling over in bed. I legit feel like I'm dying. Because my symptoms get worse after blood loss, it suddenly pops into my head that about 17 years ago after a blood donation I got really sick, and all my symptoms that I can remember having at the time are the same, especially the cardiac issues. I took iron back then and that resolved it. I started wondering if my iron was low, did a bunch of research into iron deficiency without anemia, and realized every single symptom, including ones I had been having for a while prior to the heart issues (terrible fatigue, brain fog, headaches, sleep disruptions, restless legs at night) could be from low iron.

So I need to get labs done, and also I do still need a referral to make sure my heart is ok. I can't get in with anyone, so out of desperation, I go back to my old clinic because I know they'll get me in quickly. They schedule me an appointment for the next day with a doc who is going to turn out to be batshit crazy.

I go to my appointment with my presumptive diagnosis of pericarditis, and the doctor asks if I had the Covid shot. I tell him yes, but my last booster was in 2021, so not relevant here.

Well boy howdy was I wrong. He launches into a whole-ass rant about how bad the shots are, how many people have been injured by them, tells me I, a formerly very healthy, athletic woman, now have heart issues due to the shot, etc. etc. I say, 'Ok, but would the shot really randomly cause me issues three years later when I was perfectly fine after I got it?' (The answer is no.) Doc stays the course in blaming the shot. I have paperwork I need filled out for medical leave from my job, and he PUTS ON MY PAPERWORK THAT I HAVE TO TURN IN that my cardiac issues came on and progressed after the shot (three YEARS after, you DUMBASS) and that his impression is post vaccine injury. I feel too badly to do much more than sway on the exam table and occasionally interject that I had the shot three years ago and I don't think that's the problem. The majority of my appointment is him ranting about the shots. Whatever, I'm desperate, give me my fucking referral to the cardiologist and order my iron panel.

I get labs done and sure enough, my iron is low. I start supplementing and shortly afterwards get a call from the cardiac clinic; I lucked out and got in just a few days after my referral was sent to them because someone canceled their appointment last minute. I see an ARNP at my first visit and she says the echo I had done at the hospital looks fine to her, but they'll do a seven day monitor, a repeat echocardiogram, and have me follow up with the cardiologist just to make sure they don't miss anything.

So they do this, and in the meantime, after a couple of weeks on iron supplements, I start slowly but steadily feeling a bit better. My fatigue and brain fog that I was having every day improve significantly after only a week on supplements. My dizziness goes away. I feel a tiny bit stronger every day and now can sit up longer and start holding conversations with people. It's slow but steady progress for about three weeks: and then I get my period again. It doesn't knock me back to square one, but I definitely take a couple of steps back in my recovery. It's a little lighter this time, though, which is a good sign.

I follow up with the cardiologist. He says actually my heart is in really good shape; no signs of pericarditis or anything wrong with it; my high heart rate isn't due to a cardiac issue. Cool. I didn't think so at this point, but good to hear I don't have heart issues.

So I go back to follow up with my doc and plan to ask to really focus on the iron issue since the cardiologist confirmed my heart is fine. I have come a long ways but am still mostly bedridden; it is very slow to get your levels up on iron supplementation, and every time I get my period, it sets me back a little. Maybe some low dose iron infusions would help boost my levels so my recovery doesn't go backwards on account of me bleeding for a week every few weeks.

Doc comes in the room. He is clearly Not Happy cardiology did not confirm his conspiracy theories about the shot injuring me. I tell him about the symptoms I have seen improve and even resolve after about six weeks on iron supplements, and how I think most if not all of my problems are from low iron. He pretty much completely ignores this. He asks me if my fatigue and brain fog have improved. I say, yes, they were some of the first symptoms to improve after I started taking iron. He does not even acknowledge I have spoken. He tells me he thinks I have a combination of chronic fatigue syndrome and POTS (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome) caused by the shot. I remind him I just told him my fatigue had improved a lot since starting iron. And my heart rate is coming down too and not spiking as much, my issue is that every period after I've been improving, I suddenly get a little worse again. He ignores this. He tells me he is going to refer me to the neurologist to check for chronic fatigue and POTS. Ok, whatever, I'm pretty sure I don't have those things, but fine, have another specialist tell you you're wrong.

After about eight weeks on supplements, I really feel like I'm starting to turn a corner. I don't feel normal, but my heart rate has come down quite a bit, I can stand and walk around a lot longer without feeling like I'm going to pass out, and I feel the closest to normal that I have been in months.

And then I get my period again and my heart rate goes back up. I'm super frustrated at this point because I was So Close to being a functioning human again, so I decide to push for a low dose iron infusion. I just want to boost my levels high enough to get me over this hump so every period doesn't set me back right as I feel like I'm coming back to life. I've read lots of papers on iron deficiency without anemia (meaning your hemoglobin is normal) and decide to make an appointment armed with one paper in particular which was written by a doctor who has been treating iron deficiency for decades, and which lays out really comprehensively the numbers at which patients should be considered deficient based on their labs and symptoms, what numbers you should shoot for when treating the iron deficiency (I am higher now but still quite a ways away from the goal), and also lists a bunch of symptoms women in particular have reported that have resolved with iron treatment. I highlight all the symptoms on the list that I have had, as well as other sections particularly relevant to my specific case. (Spoiler alert: I did not even give him the paper.)

So I go to my appointment and he asks if I've heard from the neurologist yet. I say no, I'm sure it will be a while (there's only one in town, and I'm sure it takes a long time to get in). In the meantime, I really want to focus on getting my iron levels up. I lay everything out: all the improvements I've seen, how my period keeps setting me back, and how I want to try just a low 100mg infusion to boost me up so I don't take two steps back every time I get my period. He tells me I have chronic fatigue and POTS as a result of the Evil Shot. I tell him, once again, that my fatigue has greatly improved on iron supplements. He does not even acknowledge I have spoken. He tells me a local doctor is being PERSECUTED and PROSECUTED for prescribing Ivermectin for Covid. Ok, that doesn't relate to my personal medical issues that we are here to discuss, and also, Ivermectin is not approved for the treatment of Covid. I ask him again if I can get a low dose infusion. I understand insurance probably won't cover it, that's fine, I can pay out of pocket, I just need him to order it. He tells me he personally takes Ivermectin. Good for you. Again, not related to my medical issues that I am here to dicuss.

I mention that I have had restless legs at night for a long time, because I know this at least is commonly associated with low iron, maybe that will get his attention; nope. He totally ignores me again. I even try blaming the shot for low iron (sorry, Covid vaccine, sometimes you have to take one for the team). I say I have read Covid and maybe even the shot can deplete your iron; maybe the shot did this to my iron. No dice. (Mr. Jenn did applaud me for trying when I told him about it, though.)

He starts in about my POTS again. I say, ok, but POTS is a postural issue, right? He says, yes! I say, ok, then if I have an issue where my nervous system doesn't regulate my blood flow properly when I change from sitting to standing, why is my resting heart rate way higher than normal when I'm just lying in bed doing nothing, and why has my heart rate been coming down and is not spiking like it was after several weeks on iron supplements until I get my period? I'm not sure that fits with POTS.

He again does not even acknowledge I've spoken.

I ask again for an infusion to help boost me up so I'm not set back every period. He says as long as I'm menstruating it will set me back. Yes, I am aware I will lose more iron on my period, what I am asking is that while I am in ACTIVE CLINICAL IRON DEFICIENCY can we please do something to speed up getting my levels high enough so every time I bleed it doesn't knock me down again. He asks if I have considered a hysterectomy or uterine ablation for the bleeding (you know, invasive surgeries, instead of talking about birth control pills, which he didn't even mention). I said that was kind of extreme and I didn't want to consider that right now. I ask him about the infusion again. He says it's not a concern. I say, yeah, it is, I am having debilitating symptoms that have left me bedridden for three months. I need to get back to my life and my job. He tells me Congress is investigating the shots and it will come out how bad they are, but a lot of people won't believe it. I say, well, that's Congress' business, can I please have an infusion. He tells me insurance won't cover it. I say I know, I already mentioned that earlier (while you were ignoring me in favor of ranting about a vaccine I had three years ago), I have a health savings account, I can pay out of pocket. He tells me he's pretty sure I have chronic fatigue and POTS but we'll see what the neurologist says. I need to call and see if I can get in more quickly with the neurologist. I say, ok, in the meantime, since realistically it could take months for me to get in with the neurologist, can I PLEASE HAVE A FUCKING INFUSION. He tells me if I want one I will have to badger another doctor into it. (I can't remember the exact word he used, but the way he worded it made it sound like I was trying to bully him. No, you jackass, I am asking for an extremely common, low risk medical treatment for issues that have left me unable to work or leave my house for anything other than doctor's appointments for THREE MONTHS.)

So I left incredibly frustrated, needless to say.

Next day Mr. Jenn goes to his appointment at the clinic I initially tried to get into to follow up on labs he had done for an annual physical, and his doctor tells him his cholesterol is slightly high, but not enough to be concerned, he just needs to watch his saturated fats and red meat intake. Mr. Jenn tells him we've actually temporarily increased our red meat intake because of my health issues. He then mentions all of the issues I've been having, my lab results, and how I've improved a lot on supplements, but keep getting set back by my period. His doctors goes, 'Have you guys looked into infusions for her? You should try that.'

I DID BUT MY DOCTOR IS CRAZY.

Mr. Jenn explains that I had asked for an infusion and my doctor refused. His doctor gives him a weird look and wants to know why. Mr. Jenn explains it's because he's super set on it being chronic fatigue and POTS and won't consider anything else even though my 'chronic fatigue' and 'POTS' symptoms have both improved on iron supplements. The doctor again gives him a weird look and asks why he's stuck on those diagnoses and won't consider iron deficiency.

Because he's crazy, good sir.

Mr. Jenn's doctor then suggests we see if I can self-refer for an infusion and just pay out of pocket, but you need a doctor's order even if you're not going through insurance, so the next day when the clinic opens, I call, explain I tried to establish care there earlier so they have my new patient paperwork, but that I needed an urgent referral, and had to go somewhere else because they were a month out, but I really (REALLY) want to change doctors, is <Mr. Jenn's doc> taking new patients? He is not, but they'll put in a note with one of the ARNPs accepting new patients to see if they're willing to schedule me.

However, I know the new manager of the clinic (actually an old coworker from the crazy clinic that I'm friendly with), so the other day I texted her, briefly explained the situation, and she asked which doctor I wanted to see and said she'll talk to him when he's back from the long holiday weekend and see if he would be willing to see me. She will let me know later this week (he's not back in till Wednesday). So fingers crossed I can get in with a non-lunatic soon.

#personal

[stardust-swan]

Secrets to the Arabian Princess Scent 💐🧴🪷

So with Arab perfumes becoming popular in the West due to their strong projection and beautiful smell, and the Arab world becoming known for our knowledge on how to smell good af, I (a half Moroccan) am going to reveal some other ways we ensure we smell amazing to the girlies on Tumblr who are interested in Arab perfumes or just in generally smelling amazing 😍 Most tips are Moroccan but many apply to the Arab world in general (under the cut because this turned into a long post) ✨💞💐

1) Good Eating Habits: When my mother moved here to Europe, she was immediately struck by how the people seemed to smell like "pig." And that's no coincidence. You are what you eat, so coming from a country where nobody eats pig to one where everyone eats it, of course you're going to be struck by people smelling like it from the inside out. Not just that, but in the Arab world, it's also way less common for people to eat takeout and drink alcohol, whereas in many parts of the West, these things are a normal part of people's diets and make them smell "sour." A lot of Arabs have also talked about how Westerners smell like "milk," and this is because Westerners tend to consume more dairy products than people in the East do. It's also common for Arabs to eat fruit as dessert instead of having cakes or cookies all the time (although speaking of cookies and cakes, the scents of rosewater, orange blossom water, almonds, honey, vanilla, oranges and lemons commonly used in Arab baking fill up the house with a wonderful smell while they're baking). Teas made from various herbal infusions are popular throughout the Arab world. Spearmint, peppermint, sage, cardamom, cinnamon, hibiscus, chamomile, anise, and thyme are commonly used to flavor tea in MENA. Dried lime tea is drunk in the Arabian Peninsula. Coffee flavoured with cardamom is also common. I especially like Turkish coffee. Spices like cinnamon, cardamom, and cloves are commonly used in cooking, and the scent of them can cling to your clothes and hair. Herbs like mint and parsley, which have natural deodorising properties, are often used in meals.

I'm not saying that you need to cut any foods out in order to smell good, but you should consider reducing the amounts of unhealthy foods and red meats you eat, and make sure to drink plenty of water and eat veggies and fruit daily.

2) Keeping a Clean House: Here in Ireland, a lot of people don't clean their houses every day. I know multiple people that only clean their floor once a week, and have a couple of neighbours who don't do much cleaning themselves and just have a housekeeper visit to clean once a week. But in Morocco, people clean daily. The home is also deep cleaned once a week, we even wash the walls. We don't wear shoes inside, and not just that, but we also have different slippers specifically for wearing inside the bathroom. Living in a clean space is important for smelling good, because no matter what you do, you'll always end up smelling like wherever you live due to spending so much time there. The scent will cling to your clothes and hair. Which means if your house smells dirty, you will also smell dirty. As well as making sure the house is clean, Arabs also make it smell pretty with extras. For example, in Morocco it's common to burn incense or bakhour (perfumed wood chips), and the scent permeates your clothes. People also keep pieces of musk in their wardrobes (wrapped in a handkerchief). It come in scents like orange blossom, jasmine, amber, sandalwood, chamomile and lavender. An unused bar of soap or a sachet of potpourri in your wardrobe will do the same job though if you can't or don't want to buy musk. The musk can also be used as a scented wax melt, a home scent (you just leave it in a bowl), or a body perfume (rub it on your skin).

Specific to Marrakech, you can buy jasmine balls which you just leave around the house (if you're not in Marrakech, you can just leave potpourri or dried flowers and herbs in sachets on your desk, bedside table, etc). The Marrakech herbal shops also sell sandalwood bark which you burn. Oud and amber are also burned.

3) Personal Hygiene: In the Arab world, people shower daily. In Morocco, we also go to the hammam (public bath) once a week, and we sit in the sauna room, and then rub our bodies with sabon beldi (black soap), a natural soap made from olive oil and black olives, leaving it on for a few minutes before rinsing it off. Then we scrub our skin with a kessa glove after it's marinated. Exfoliating dead skin regularly makes perfume cling to you better (if you order Korean bath towels from Amazon, they're very similar to Moroccan kessa gloves and you use them in a similar way). Then after washing our hair, we use a ghassoul clay mask (some people also rub henna into their skin). After washing the clay off, many people rub rosewater or argan oil into their skin before heading to the relaxation area to enjoy refreshments. As well as helping us smell good, it also makes our skin incomparably soft. When my parents were newlyweds, my father remarked on how he'd never felt a woman with such soft skin in his life before. My mother attributes it to regularly using the hammams before moving here.

Obviously not everyone has access to a hammam, but you can create a similar experience at home. Just sit in a steamy hot shower for 10-15 minutes, wash your skin with a natural soap and leave it on for a few minutes before rinsing off and exfoliating with a glove. Then tone with rosewater and apply oil to your body.

Dukhan treatments (smoke baths) are practiced in Sudan. Married women and brides anoint themselves with oil, before sitting over a chair with a hole in the centre. Under the seat, there is a pit, in which acacia wood, frankincense, or other aromatic woods and resins are burned in a clay vessel.

As well as showering daily (and using the hammam regularly if you're Maghrebi), many people in the Arab world also perform wudu (ritual cleansing) five times a day before praying.

Alum was commonly used as a natural deodorant in the Arab world in the past, and some still use it today.

Bidets are also common in the Arab world. In the Northern Hemisphere they're uncommon, but it's easy to get a portable bidet (a small squeezable bottle with a nozzle) online.

We also wash our hands before meals, with a pitcher of water which is passed around the room. In Turkey, they use kolonya, made from fig blossoms, jasmine, rose, or citrus to disinfect their hands.

4) Fragrances, Lotions and Potions: In the Arab world, perfumes are incredible. They're oil-based, so they have excellent projection and longevity. The olfactory notes commonly used in them are beautiful too: delicate rosewater and orange blossom water, exotic oud, sweet amber, vibrant roses and jasmine. In Morocco, gardenia scents are popular, even among men.

Emirati perfumes are the most well known in the West and are super good. Some personal favourites of mine include Oud Mood by Lattafa (Caramel, rose, saffron, and oud), Fatima Pink by Zimaya (Sweet rose that smells like a bit like Turkish delight. it's a dupe of the French Parfums De Marly Delina, however, the actual Delina smells very similar to generic rose oil perfumes you can get in the Arab world to begin with so Zimaya was basically able to dupe it to a T. Their version lasts really long too), Ameerat Al Arab by Lattafa (jasmine, a hint of oud, slightly citrusy. Also the name means "Arabian Princess" in English), Fakhar Rose by Lattafa (sweet, fruity, and very floral) and Yara by Lattafa (floral, amber, vanilla and strawberry). I buy my perfumes from Dubai Perfume Shop in Dublin, but they can be easily found online. Some well-known Arab perfume houses include Lattafa, Al Rehab, Zimaya, Al Qurashi, Amouage, Afnan, Ajmal, Asdaaf, Al Haramain, Armaf, Kayali, Maison Alhambra, and Swiss Arabian, but there are hundreds more.

As well as sprayable perfume, perfume oil is also used. It usually comes in rollerballs, is inexpensive, and lasts for ages. Like spray perfume, it comes in a huge variety of scents.

Arabs know when to wear perfumes. For example, a rich, sweet, strong oud and vanilla scent will be beautiful in colder weather. But in warm weather, it will become cloying and sickly. Musk, amber and saffron are popular in winter, while rose, orange blossom and jasmine are popular in summer.

In the Arab world, many stalls in the Medina sell gorgeous oils, fragrances and soaps that are inexpensive. For example, the musk I mentioned above. As well as making your home smell incredible, you can also rub it on your body and you'll smell good for days.

Rosewater is commonly used as a toner and to remove makeup. In the town of Skoura, where my great grandparents were from, men even use it to shave with! Orange blossom water is also used in Arab beauty routines in a similar way to rosewater. You can apply either to a bath for extra luxury.

Argan oil is commonly used in Morocco on both skin and hair, as well as the less well-known but just as good prickly pear oil (which is very high in vitamin E). Pure argan oil actually smells a bit stinky fyi, but for beauty, things like rose oil and menthol are commonly added, so it smells pretty good. Throughout the Middle East and North Africa, jasmine hair oil, castor oil and sweet almond oil (I like putting it in my baths and on my body) are easy to find. Usually Middle Eastern and South Asian shops in the West sell them too.

Honey and almond masks have been used since ancient times, and to this day are still popular. You can buy them basically anywhere. Homemade face masks made from honey and yoghurt or crushed figs and yoghurt are also used.

Aloe Vera is used to treat dry skin, acne, and sunburns. It has a cool and refreshing scent, perfect for the hot climate in many parts of the Arabian world. I like applying it after shaving as it's soothing, natural, and absorbs easily.

Frankincense, a resin used in the Middle East and North Africa for thousands of years, was traditionally used as a natural perfume. It's commonly used in incense. Frankincense oil is also good for the skin.

There are many beautiful scented soaps available in the Arab world. If you go to Turkish or Arab supermarkets, a lot of them will have a section where they sell hygiene products, including soaps with ingredients like argan, rose and oud, and olive oil. I've even found Syrian Aleppo soap before. You can just buy soaps from regular stores in scents like rose, jasmine, honey and almond, orange blossom and sandalwood for achieving that exotic scent though.

As well as using various oils, perfumes, and fragrant beauty treatments, Arab women also know how to layer these different scents to add dimension to them and avoid clashing. For example, a rose perfume over a vanilla lotion will always smell good. Other combinations that are good include almond and vanilla, rose and oud, rose and jasmine, lavender and lemon, rose and orange blossom, and orange blossom and vanilla. But there are many different combinations you can use to achieve a delicious scent that's unique to you.

I hope this was helpful, stay pretty ✨

#law of attraction #becoming that girl #clean girl #it girl #dream girl #girlblogging #dream girl journey #glow up tips #glow up #dream girl tips #dream life #wonyongism #pink pilates girl #pink pilates princess #it girl energy #girly tumblr #just girly things #just girly thoughts #just girly posts #pink blog #hyperfeminine #girly #princess life #princesscore #masterpost #levelling up journey #level up #hypergamy #high maintenance #high value woman

[666writingcafe]

A New Beginning

Author's Note: Welcome to season one of Nightbringer. Normally I take breaks in between season rewrites, but not this time. Inspiration is causing me to go full steam ahead.

MC

Everything hits me all at once. The various sounds, smells, and sights in this part of the Devildom are so intense that I nearly collapse onto the ground. I try closing my eyes in order to calm myself down, but to no avail; in fact, doing so only makes it more difficult for me to concentrate on any one thing. It's overwhelming, and I feel like crying and screaming for it to stop.

Thankfully, before I succumb to my emotions, everything suddenly grows quiet and dull. Solomon must have cast a spell to help me focus.

"I'm still unsure about this," he tells me softly. "Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

"I'll be fine," I answer. "I just have to get used to it, that's all. Plus, it's not like these guys are going to listen to some random human off the street. You at least were alive during this time and, more importantly, had the pact with Barbatos. Meanwhile, I wasn't even a thought."

"I understand, MC, but considering what you just went through with the boogeyman, I'm surprised you even considered taking on this form."

"Not all demons are monsters." I briefly pause. "Speaking of which, how do I look?" I slowly turn in a circle so that Solomon can take in all of my appearance.

"Rather convincing," he responds. "The horns and tail are a nice touch, although the eyes are a little disconcerting."

"I'm meant to look like a sheep."

"Why did you choose that animal, anyway?"

"Thought it suited me, considering I've been called one multiple times before."

"Fair enough. Have you thought of a name?" I nod my head.

"Zephyr." Solomon looks me up and down.

"I like it. The name suits you." He steps closer to me and grabs my hand.

"I take it you're ready, then?"

"As ready as I'll ever be." I clear my throat, recalling the words Satan once said to me.

"I am Zephyr. I pledge myself to you, Solomon, that we may be bound by an unbreakable pact. This I swear to you on both my name as well as the very blood that runs through my veins.” Once the mark appears on Solomon's skin, he warns me to not abuse the power I now hold over him.

"Of course," I reply. "Just as long as you don't do it to me."

"I wouldn't dare." The corner of his mouth curves upward.

"Solomon, I'm being serious."

"I am, too. I know you'd kick my ass if I went against my word."

"And that amuses you?" Solomon playfully shrugs, and I sigh, knowing that I'm not going to get a direct answer out of him.

Our current plan of attack is as follows: the two of us are going to settle down in an old cabin that Solomon spent some time in as a young cabin. Then, we'll hit the streets of the downtown area to get supplies and information. After all, we can't exactly just storm into the Demon King's castle and demand to speak to Diavolo or see any of the brothers. We don't have that kind of authority here.

Perhaps if we're lucky we'll bump into someone we recognize, and they might be able to help us, but I'm not counting on it. Besides, even if we did, it's not like we can talk to them like we're best friends. In their eyes, they've never seen us before. Well, not me, anyway. Solomon knew a couple of people here in this time period, but the chances of us running into them are slim.

Hopefully this doesn't prove to be overly difficult.

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr

#obey me shall we date #obey me mc #obey me solomon #obey me nightbringer

[bitchfitch]

I hate researching anything to do with elden ring bc it exposes me to so many people doing backflips to deny that the plot of the story... is the plot of the story.

long ass lore ramble below the cut. but tldr. Miquella is a grown ass man and Mohgs plan is dumb as shit bc he is going to get turned into a soot stain .2 seconds after miqy wakes up,

Like. Ok. there's this queen, Marika, simplifying some things here, but she's the human embodiment/avatar of this God™, to the point we can just call her a goddess so I don't have to explain what the fuck is going on with the Greater Will.

As queen her second in command is the Elden Lord. at the time of the game, there has been 2 Elden Lords¹. Her first husband, and her second husband. As the player, your goal is to become the Elden Lord.

When you get all the way to the end of the game you you marry Marika. Becoming her third Elden Lord. (alternatively you can marry a different woman, Ranni, who's goal is to become a goddess herself and replace Marika as god-queen, so you'll be her Elden Lord instead.)

so we can all agree that Elden Lord as a title, is the title of whoever is married to the god-monarch, right?

and so when a character says they want to be Elden Lord, under the golden order, they intend to marry the god-monarch that is the only way, they know of, to be Elden Lord.

So when the demigods went to war over who was going to be Elden Lord, not king or queen, elden lord, they were fighting to marry Marika. Who is the mother, father (don't ask), or both (don't ask, again) of all the demigods.

which is where my pet peeve comes in. Mohg, my favorite idiot clown, doesn't want to marry Marika. he wants nothing to do with his Mother who dropped him and his twin down a sewer.

Instead Mohg wants to marry one of the empyreans.

Ranni you remember her, Miquella, and Malenia are the empyreans², Ranni is MIA, Malenia is scary, and Miquella is conveniently comatose because he is actively attempting to make the transition from empyrean to God™ and then God-Monarch³ after he kills his momdad⁴. Marika.

which Is To Say. it makes me bonkers when people act like Mohg is the odd man out here. Like He's the weird one for wanting to marry a member of his own family. That's the normal part of his plan! the part that's weird and stupid is he is presuming Miquella won't fucking obliterate him the second he wakes up. He saw the competition for (basically) the corpse of his mom, and said Fuck that, and decided to test his luck with this actively ticking down bomb.

"no people think he's weird for wanting to marry Miquella because Miquella is a child!⁶" no he's not. Miquella and Malenia. are twins. a thing about twins is, they are always roughly the same age. If one of these is an adult so is the other.

¹ there was another elden lord, a dragon who's name I'm not going to try to spell, before the age of Marika and her shit family. no one cares about him. he is included as an asterisk for the pedants.

² Miquella and Malenia are Empyreans by blood bc they're the people Marika is both mother and father too. They have no human half like everyone else. Ranni (Marika is her dad) is an empyrean because she killed her human body and kept her god soul. this asterisk is bc God is this a dumb ass family tree that's annoying and confusing to think about.

³ I've intentionally left Radagon out of as much of this explanation as possible. I do not want to explain Marika making a second her who is a man, so he could go marry this human queen to ensure an alliance with her, father a few problems, and then divorce her to go marry Marika, who he is, and then father two more problems. ⁵

[⁵ Maybe three? Personally I'm pretty sure Melina is a Millicent type situation where she doesn't have a father, unlike the twins who's father and mother are the same person but not in a way that makes sense. but I don't think there's any in game confirmation either way]

⁴ Miquella might be a trans girl? Elden Ring is weird about gender, but that's why I'm still using Monarch instead of king in case she decides to come out and be Queen Trina. Personally I think it would be cool if she was gender fluid but that's a Different Post.

⁶ The man is old enough to start a cult, become a God™, command armies, and send his sister to go fight their shit half brother and permanently destroy part of their continents eco system. Literally. he is Just Short. "he's cursed to be eternally young!" how has that manifested outside of him being scrawny and mildly weaker than the outer gods? He uses people thinking he's a kid to his advantage! He knows how people perceive him as weak despite Malenia herself calling him the scariest of all the demigods for his ability to make people love him and drive people insane. He's a grown ass man and you're falling for the same trick Mohg did and everyone agrees, that guys a fucking idiot.

⁷ I didn't know where to put the three fingers and their ending, but They're an option too. Honestly. I've got suspicions about them and their connection to miq but Not Going There

#im still of the firm opinion that the funniest thing fromsoft could do with the dlc is make it Explicitly clear #that Miquella has no fucking clue hes been kidnapped or who mohg even is. #I want that man obliterated on Accident. #just utterly not on Miquella's radar in any way shape or form #like i ship them obviously but thats because im a sucker for the nightmare that would be their relationship if Miquella wasn't in a coma #i do not want them to be canon in any way

[royalarchivist]

[A sad violin song plays over an image of a sad hamster]

Pac: This doesn't have anything to do with me – I wear a blue sweatshirt, you're crazy, this mouse doesn't even have a sweatshirt, this hamster! [Reading chat] Am I a depressed hamster?

[ Transcript continued ↓ ]*

–

Pac: Actually– that's fine! I embrace that idea – of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy? [He hits his desk, then starts counting off people on his fingers] Fit is gone, Richarlyson is gone, Ramon is gone, Bagi and Empanada who were always there when we were there are also gone, I haven't seen them! It's just me and Tubbo, and sometimes Philza shows up.

Pac: I lost Chume Labs, I lost the Favela, I lost Murder Mystery, I lost Ilha Chume Labs, it's crazy! Look at how much I've lost, and I've gained nothing! Of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy?! How am I supposed to be happy?!

Pac: [Reading chat] "You have us Pac," that's true, thank you. No, that's true, sorry.

* NOTE: Please note that this is an incomplete transcript, as I was primarily relying on Aypierre's translation mod at the time and if I am not confident of the translation, I do not include it. As always, please feel free to add on translations or message me corrections.

#Pactw #QSMP #Pac #March 18 2024 #As much as I love keeping people updated about Pac / the other Portuguese-speaking creators #I think I might not make as many transcribed posts for their clips anymore #I just don't think I'm qualified enough to be transcribing things for a language I don't know #like yeah we have the Qlobal Translator and Aypierre's translators to rely on #And I'm always upfront when I'm not 100% sure about a translation #but I've been thinking about it a lot and it kinda makes me feel a bit icky. Idk. #I might be overthinking this but I just I don't want to spread around translations I'm not super confident about #esp. since I know a lot of people cite my clips in analysis posts or link them to other people as resources #and 90% of the time I'm like ''Hell yeah I love seeing people getting a lot of use out of the archive'' #but sometimes I get a bit anxious like ''Did I do a good enough job translating this'' #''Am I ruining someone's entire perception of a conversation or character because I left one word out or mistranslated something?'' #And like I said that's normally not a HUGE concern since if I'm not certain about a translation I just won't post a clip. but you know #idk it might just be the anxiety talking but I really really don't want to spread bad info #Happy to hear other folks' perspective #I'm really grateful for people like Bell and Pix and others who translate clips and I always try to reblog those #but we don't have a ton of people posting clips & translating things on Tumblr since we're so English-centric #which is part of the reason WHY I like sharing clips of the non-English-speaking CCs #but at the same time I want to do an accurate job representing what they're saying #Maybe I'll just start posting things and give a TLDR context of what they're talking about but not a transcript #that way native-speakers can hop in and add translations if that's something they're comfortable doing #and if not then well. at least I'm not sharing something that isn't super accurate #idk I'm just thinking out loud a bit in the tags #But I'm open to hearing other people's thoughts on the matter #Anyways giant rant aside. q!Pac is NOT doing ok rn

[icewindandboringhorror]

Some fantasy traveler inventory details (like what they would carry in their bags), based on two of the recent costumes I did.. love finding random little scraps and items and putting them together lol

#it's obvious who's is who's since they match their outfits HOWEVER.. consider if they were switched lol #evil villain looking man carrying around pressed flowers in a cutesy lacy pouch #fantasy costume #what's in my bag #actualyl that would have been funny to make a video. I should make a video #I'm sure someone else has already done this #but like.. lifestyle vlogger type content however I'm dressed in fully costume as some weird elf or something #pulling things out of my bag and showing them to the camera and talking about how they're useful for whatever #but it's all fantasy scenarios and talking like it's very common #'and of course. i know it's a bit cliche #EVERY traveler has one of these. but you know. theyre just useful! thats why everyone has one!' *pulls out a completely unrecognizable item #thats like some weird fantasy world prop and doesn't even explain it because In-world it's normal and wouldnt need to be talked about* #'room tour' video and it's just like 'yeah I sleep on this mat under a bunch of trees uh.. over here by these rocks. at least right now. I #kind of wander around a bit. so' #Like a clothing haul but it's a potions shop haul or something and they ramble about some obscure drama in the potions community and how the #y hard to barter and steal and entire flock of sheep or something just to get one of them. etc. etc. #I could do ones for different characters too like. multiple people from different walks of life showing what they carry around with them. #just like this but more interview sort of vlog format instead of photos #This is where not having much money and not having my own house with land becomes an issue though #I think it would take you out of the illusion if the background was always the same. I can make small sets because there's one blank wall in #a room that it's easy to move all the stuff away from in front of and clear a spot and like hang up fabrics or whatever but still.. hmms #So one of those 'fun idea but dubious about handling the execution' things. also One Of Those Things where without looking it up you're 100% #sure it's already been done and you don't want to look weird since it's vaguely niche. Like if 100 people have done something it's fine but #if only like 3 other people have then you look weird maybe ghhjbj.. or only one other person gods forbid. looks even weirder potentially #Or do people not care about ''copying'' anymore?? idk. I'm not updated with the internet's changing culture. I just have a fear of accidenta #lly doing something like that and then people getting mad even though it's really just that I competely had no idea it had been done because #again.. I live under a rock and am unaware of everything lol. ANYWAY. also would require my face being on video which I don't like. Though I #would be in costume so that helps. I think to be fully comfortable I'd need light modifications to make my face look different. which isn't #hard but is more effort when it has to be translatable in multiple angles. ANYWAY. ghjbhj... Now I think it would be funny actually. maybe #one day. I haven't made any videos (aside from on the gameplay/sims channel) in a long long time actually. hmm'st

[fictionadventurer]

The worst part about reading in a genre where you have low expectations (in this case, Christian historical fiction) is that when a book impresses you, you have no idea if it's actually good or if you're just overly impressed because it was a fraction of a degree better than the usual garbage.

#basically lately anytime i read a christian fiction book that isn't romance-based i find myself surprised by the quality #i do think that some christian publishers are getting better #and trying to tell stories that dig deeper into real faith and messy issues #instead of making only vapid squeaky clean prayer-filled tropefests #but i'm not sure *how much* better #because anything above the low bar feels like great literature #the most recent is 'in a far-off land' by stephanie landsem #and let me tell you setting the prodigal son in 1930s hollywood is a genius concept #i have some issues with the history and the mystery #but the characters! #it has been a long time since i cried this hard over a book #several chapters of solid waterworks #(and i also have the issue of figuring out if it's actually that moving or if i'm just hormonal/sleep-deprived) #i keep thinking about this book but also i worry about recommending because what if it's actually terrible by normal book standards? #(also the author DOES NOT understand the seal of confession and i was SHOCKED to find that she's actually catholic) #but also looking at the reviews makes it clear that if most of christian fiction is vapid garbage it's these reviewers' fault #here you have something that's digging into sin and darkness and justice and mercy and these people are just #'how can it call itself christian fiction if it only mentions god at the end?' #are we reading the same book this WHOLE THING is about god! and humanity and our fallen nature and how this breaks relationships! #your pearl-clutching anytime someone tries to get even a tiny bit realistic is destroying this genre #i'm gonna run out of tags so i'll stop now

[liquidstar]

This is such a tangent btw but on the topic of guilt tripping and reblogs... I remember a few years back there were some terrible fires in Greece (and again this year, entire island villages are gone now) and at that time I had family who were caught in them. I can't describe the desperation I felt with these horrible things happening to my family and loved ones in my country. And I remember being frustrated and desperate with how no one around me in America really seemed to give a shit. I remember blogging asking people to PLEASE care please share something please reblog this link for mutual aid please think about the stories and fires etc etc etc. And the thing is I was very much in a state of grief myself, maybe not every word or action was perfectly reasonable, because I don't realistically expect everyone everywhere to care about every tragedy in the world. You can't. Emotionally it's just not possible, especially with all the stuff going on in the states rn too. Yeah it's a lot. It's not like I blog about every tragedy that ever happens either. I understand.

HOWEVER what I also remember was at this time there were a couple mutuals very clearly making vagueposts along the lines of "remember not everyone has the energy to care about everything in the world uwu" while I was posting about family who died and family who were drifting in the ocean for hours as their homes and loved ones burned. Listen. You have to understand sometimes that when a person in grief and frustration with things going on in their countries and communities impacts them very personally beg you to care... It's coming from a place of needing to see that care in the world in general. They're not holding a gun to your head Specifically saying you have to reblog the posts, if you don't have the energy just ignore it.

You don't have to go out of your way saying "um actually I can't care about the horrible stuff you and your family and your country are experiencing rn. I'm too busy focusing on my own stuff so can you be quiet or more reasonable with your grief thanks." Like. Just keep it to yourself then??? Have some fucking sympathy for other people and understand that maybe it's not always logical. The same way you don't have the emotional energy to think about every tragedy in the world, people who've been impacted by them often don't have the emotional energy to handle that alone and may seek somekinda community or solidarity. Idk. It's not about forcing shit on you sometimes it's not about you

#part of me thinks the 'we don't have time to care about everything all the time' has set us back a bit because it gets used as an excuse #bc most of the time no one is like asking you to become a hardcore advocate for every cause ever they're just saying like #hey reblog this donation post. and like I'm going to be real how much possible emotional energy is that really taking from you #compared to the actual activism the statement was meant for and such. like come on #surely less than complaining about people having the gull to ask you to give a shit right? #you can still have sympathy for multiple things without necessarily devoting a lot of your energy to said things you know? #doesn't mean you have to surround yourself with them to become the perfect most progressive activist or whatever #but you can like. idk. express sympathy or condolences in passing every now and then. like people normally do. idk #instead of being like 'how dare you ask me to care! there's issues in my own country i have to blog about!' are you for fucking real #but yeah enough time has passed that i can think more rationally about this and now know that that was a careless response #exactly the type of people you were afraid of being the representatives of the worlds apathy in your greif etc #but there are also people who do care is the thing #and obviously for the record I'm not mutuals w the former anymore bc like Christ

[angelsdean]

ruthlessly deleting old 2021/2022 posts (not by me) from my dean studies tag like *click* un-incorporating that from my beliefs system! also the way SO many posts have me like ok uh-huh good aaand then say one completely wrong thing that loses me. it's so many posts.

#it's usually when they randomly drop some line of fanon. like saying dean has never admitted to being wrong in his life #or never expressed an emotion or been vulnerable or doesn't Talk About Feelings or is super duper RepressedTM #like i'm sorry. have you watched the show. oh and have you taken off the sammy POV goggles first? #bc this guy is always crying and being vulnerable and talking about his feelings. he is self-aware. #he may not always want to talk to sam abt things! but he sure does talk about things with other people #do i need to reblog the compilation posts AGAIN? #(also re: his sexualiy? AWARE. sorry i saw him flirt and be flustered by so many men. he knows how he feels.) #and then 'first time ever admitting to being wrong' this one came from a post abt dean's prayer in the trap #like i'm sorry but first of all. dean apologizes more than any other character on the show. there are hard numbers on this. #people have tracked this on spreadsheets. i think ilarual is one of them. #and often he is apologizing for things that aren't even his fault! but he still feels responsible for bc he's been made to feel that way #his whole life!! #other characters *cough samandcas *cough* apologizing Less doesn't mean they've Done less things wrong #it just means they're not owning up to it and brushing it under the rug. something both do frequently. #anyways. aside from apologies. dean also has no problem admitting he's wrong y'know when he's actually wrong #which is less often than you'd think bc he has pretty good instincts and intuition and often suspects things which turn out to be Right #but anyways. another thing abt the trap prayer is. i don't think cas Needed to be forgiven #i think dean was justified in feeling angry w cas over the circumstances leading to the Death of His Mother! totally normal grief response! #i think cas also understands dean to be someone who needs time to process and deal with his feelings (he says as much to jack) #however. despite me not think dean Needs to forgive cas. the thing is. with dean when it comes to cas the forgiveness is implicit #when he says /of course i forgive you/ and in the cut like /of course i wanted you to stay/ like. yes he was mad and dealing with grief #but also. yes cas was already forgiven even back then. he just needed Time to work through the feelings #anyways i think dean says he 'forgives' cas bc it's what CAS needed to hear to stop feeling guilty and dean gives him that closure #but i also think cas was already forgiven even in dean's anger. he wants him there always. i'd rather have you. we can fix this. etc etc #a lot of tags for a non-rebloggable post ajksdfs maybe i'll make these into a real post sometime #vic.txt #dean and feelings #so i can find this all again later

[yesokayiknow]

cannot believe that in 2007 the eighth doctor adventures writers just decided to put toxic yuri in their show. they did that for me

#not me going insane over 2 minor recurring villains #but literally what the fuck is going on with the headhunter and karen #what if an amoral assassin and a normal office worker decided to become partners on a whim & now they time travel and commit crimes together #like what????? #the headhunter could not give less of a shit about other people and doesn't think karen is useful at all and yet just keeps her around #and karen's like yeah she hates my guts and also she makes me kill people. it's a laugh though can't complain #and i'm just meant to be normal about that?????? huh??????? #also the way they both just flirt with lucie every time they see her is so funny #karen's like hey babe!!!! how are you!!!! do you want to join us!!!! while holding a knife to lucie's neck shdjshs #while the headhunter's like ah lucie miller the thorn in my side [saves her life] this means nothing [saves her life] you disgust me [saves- #doctor who #big finish #i've finished s3!!!! whoop!!!! #my thoughts are why does lucie miller keep getting turned evil and can it keep happening bc it's hot. who said that #my only issue with this format is that it's very adventure based. which yeah it's called the 8th doctor adventures #but i wish there was more breathing room for lucie. the doctor keeps being all sad (fair his life is awful) but lucie's going Through It #and never gets a chance to really process anything #also the retroactive continuity errors make me laugh #'i'm 900 years old' no the fuck you're not! you still have the time war yet buddy! #i like to think they're just signs of 8's swiss cheese memory #i hope there's books set in this era. i'm sure nobody will be able to tell me bc they gave up 20 tags ago agdkhsjshsjs