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brelione · 4 years

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The Goddess Part Two (JJ Maybank x Reader)

Part Three Part One

The next time he saw you was at the petting zoo.He knew you’d be there but for some reason he was still shocked to see you.You hadnt seen him yet,though.It was before opening hours.He was hiding in the lower branches of a tree,watching as you sung to the goats.He couldnt even understand the words you were saying,just the sound of your voice as it hit unbelievably high notes.It was enough to make his heart thump,his chest to tighten and him to almost fall off of the tree branch he had been clinging too.Suddenly you were all that mattered to him.Nothing else existed.Just you.His eyes were almost like cameras,zooming in on you.You were wearing a white sundress that somehow hadnt gotten any dirt or goat poop on it.Your hair was messy and curly from the salt water you swam in all the time,your shiny jewelry glistening in the sunlight.You snapped your fingers,one of the smaller goats had literally jumped on you.

You giggled,holding a flower out to it.The goat got back down and they ran around their hay covered fenced in area.Your house was a good distance away from the area but it was still within his line of vision.Your family was absolutely rich but you werent kooks.You guys willingly chose to live in a shitty house.It looked shitty from the outside but JJ had never been inside.Your father had payed JJ large amounts of money to mow your lawn every tuesday.It didnt need to be mowed.You could just have the goats eat up the excess grass,or the chickens,or the cows.But little did JJ know that you were behind his weekly job.You knew that JJ didnt have a lot of money and shifted between John.B’s house and his own house,spending some nights at the beach.

You wanted JJ to have a good amount of money for anything he might need.Whether it be gas,a coffee,a new shirt,going to the laundromat.You just liked the idea of him being safe and happy all the time.Thats when he had seen you wearing that lovely sweater.You had come out of your house,placing a small jar of home made jam,a paper bag and an energy drink out on your deck before going back inside.JJ had been watching you out of the corner of his eye,blushing a bit when he realized that you were leaving him a breakfast.You left the fenced in area,the goats trying to follow you out. “Oh,dont act like you dont get all the attention in the world!”You had said quietly to them as they stared up at you.

JJ didnt even wonder how he had heard it from where he was.You were walking towards the tree with a light blue bag.JJ cursed,trying to move higher up in the tree.He hadnt even noticed that he was in the branches above the cows.There were six cows total,two of which were extremely fluffy.When you got to the fence only a few feet away from him you looked over at the tree. “Hey.”You nodded before opening the light blue bag.His eyebrows furrowed,stunned by how casual you were being. “Hi.”He replied,his voice sounding hoarse.He mentally slapped himself,clearing his throat quietly. “You know we dont let anyone pet the goats or hold the chickens until 10.What’s up?”You asked,taking fistfulls of food out of the light blue bag as cows approached you.He rolled his eyes so far back in his head he should’ve been able to see his brain,resting his head against the tree bark.Why did you have to be like this?He actually wanted to talk to you,to have a conversation and make you giggle.

“I mow your lawn on Tuesday’s,princess.”He reminded you.You raised your eyebrows as you pet one of the cows. “J,its monday.”You huffed as you let another cow eat oats straight out of your hand.He scoffed. “It is not-”He paused to take out his phone,checking the day. “Shit.”He groaned.You smiled. “Its fine,JJ.Have you eaten today?”You asked.He grumbled something. “What?”You asked.He sighed. “I said,why do you care?”He asked.You shrugged,tossing out more oats. “Breakfast is really important for you guys.”You replied,eyes going wide when you realized what you said.He squinted. “What?You mean poor people?”He asked,aggravated.You shook your head. “No,JJ.Thats not what I mean at all.You’re a growing boy,you need to eat.”You explained yourself.He hopped down from the tree,towering over you.

You stared up at him.He stared at you with admiration.Your eyes were slightly puffy from just waking up,the whites of your eyes slightly pink.You smelled like peaches,cookie dough and ocean.It was a strange concoction but somehow it was pleasant.You were wearing cute socks that had winnie the pooh on them.You werent wearing shoes though,just the socks and the dress. “So um...I have to collect the chicken eggs.Do you want breakfast or a coffee or something?”You asked,playing with your bracelets.As much as he hated you-or at least as he pretended to hate you he was really hungry.He wasnt hungry.He just wanted to be around you.He shrugged. “Okay,but that doesnt make us friends.”he pointed at you.You nodded,biting back a smile. “Wouldnt dream of it.”You replied.He followed you to the chicken coop. “Morning ladies!”You exclaimed as you opened the nesting boxes,placing the eggs in an egg carton. “Um….Im sorry JJ,but could you please hold this?”You asked,gesturing toward the egg carton.

He held out his hands and you thanked him quietly,handing him the egg carton.Perhaps if he really hated you as much as he said he did he would drop the eggs on purpose.But he didnt.You apologized a few times for the long walk to the house from the chicken coop.You struggled to open the door,kicking it open.He just followed you to the kitchen.Your house was….it was just kind of beautifully chaotic.Murals across the walls,mermaids,a sunset with beautiful blue waves.Your kitchen had white tiles on the floor,marble counter tops and a white fridge.The table had a white tablecloth that was covered with flower print.You placed the two egg cartons you had been carrying down.You jumped a bit when you moved your elbow,feeling JJ right behind you. “Sorry.”You mumbled,moving out of the way.He grinned at how nervous he was making you right now.Usually it was the other way around.Your kitchen smelled like bread and strawberries.His nose was correct.

He spotted jars of strawberry jam and saw a loaf of bread wrapped in parchment paper. “What do you want for breakfast?”You asked him.He glanced at the bread and jam on the countertops.You turned,getting the message.You told him to sit down at the table and he couldnt help but feel a bit uneasy.He’d never been inside your house before.He looked outside your kitchen window to see your garden.Your garden was kind of famous.Lemon and peach trees,berry bushes,flowers,herbs,garlic and potatoes.People from figure 8 would call your father when they were in need of bread,biscuits,muffins,cakes,jellys,jams,eggs.

Basically anything.A good amount of families had hosted birthdays at your house and you’d help your father bake the cakes,usually making spaghetti or mac and cheese for the children.And now JJ was sitting at your kitchen table about to dine like a king free of charge.He took this chance to ask you some questions about yourself,knowing youd probably answer honestly without thinking about it because you were currently busy. “So like...whats the deal with your mom?”He asked.You shrugged your shoulders as you spread jam across a slice of bread. “She dropped me off at the door then disappeared.”You replied.Youd been over the story dozens of times,no emotions even ties to the story at this point.He nodded. “That sucks.”You giggled quietly at the statement.You really didnt care.She made her choice and your father made his.

“So what do you do all day in this house?You never go anywhere.You got a lot of boyfriends that come around?”He asked.You sighed as you cut up an apple.You smiled to yourself.That was the stupidest thing youd ever heard. “I go places.”You retaliated.He scoffed. “Where?Where have you gone?”He asked.You blushed from the realization. “I go to the beach.”You replied,looking over your shoulder. “You need to get out more.Half the people on this island dont even know you exist.”He watched how your body moved as you arranged the apples into a flower. “Okay.”Was all you had do say before you placed the plate down in front of him. “You want some coffee?”you asked.He shook his head.

“Sit down.”He suggested.He was telling you what to do in your own house.That was probably the strangest thing that had happened for you that week.You sat across from him,tapping on the wooden table. “thanks,(Y/N).”He mumbled quietly.You just nodded.He stared down at his plate,not touching the food. “You’re not gonna eat anything?”He asked.You shook your head. “Not up for it,I already had a coffee today.”You replied.He nodded. “You werent freaked out over the fact I was in one of your trees...why?”He asked.You just shrugged. “A lot of weird stuff happens in my life,believe it or not.”You replied,watching him pull apart his bread and stuff it in him mouth. “So...um….are you gonna leave when youre done with breakfast?”You asked.He grinned. “Wow,trying to get rid of me already?”He asked.You huffed. “Its not like that!Im just trying to figure out what my plan is for the day.”You explained yourself.He nodded.

“Its not like you’ve got any big plans.I think im gonna stay around here just to spite you.”He smiled.You nodded. “Okay.”You replied.He ran his hand through his hair. “Im kidding.”He replied.You nodded. “Right.I mean I guess you could stay here if you want.”You offered.He chewed his bottom lip. “What if you come with me to the beach and surf for a while?Ive heard you’re okayish as surfing.”He smirked.You scratched your collarbone. “Uh...okay.Okay.”You mumbled awkwardly.You couldnt believe you had just agreed to hang out with JJ Maybank of all people.He hated you.You just had to hope that he wouldnt murder you or something.His eyes widened. “Yeah?You’re gonna come over to the dark side with me?”He asked,smile widening.You grinned. “Dont make me regret it.”You mumbled,getting up from the table.He heard you go up the stairs and he let out a loud sigh.He really just did that.

He wiped his palms of his shorts,blinking hard.He was gonna spend the day with you.He couldnt mess this up.That being said you already thought he hated you and he was kind of a bitch to you but now you would get to actually hang out with him.This was his chance to become your friend.He ate the rest of his breakfast as quickly as he could,placing the plate in the sink.He heard you come back down stairs.He turned to send you a teasin remark but his jaw fell,eyes going wide when he saw what you were wearing.That sweater.You had changed out of the dress,now wearing black shorts,flip flops and that sweater that looked unbelievably amazing on you. “Uh-youre ready to go?”He asked.You nodded.The two of you walked out and you stopped to grab your surfboard. “I know a good surf spot.”He told you.You nodded.He took you down some old dirt roads and a small path through the woods.WHen you came out of the woods you were on pale hot sand,shells and small smooth rocks sprinkling across the land. “The waves are kinda small but theyll get bigger.”He said,sitting down. “Thats what she said.”You grinned to yourself.

@xlittlemissydjx @lasnaro

#jj maybankxreader #jj maybank #jj x you #jj outer banks #outer banks #jj obx #obx #sarah cameron #john b #rafe cameron #kiara carrera

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witchcraft-in-wonderland · 4 years

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Rockabye Royalty (One-Shot)

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"I dont care! Just get out of my house! I'm not taking care of a stupid baby!" Virgil's head rang with the sound of his boyfriend's yells. He hadnt meant for this to happen. He'd been on the pill, there was hardly a time when he wasn't. Erin had promised to keep him safe, he'd promised that nothing was going to break them apart. Yet here he was with fury in his eyes, holding a stick with two lines on it.

"Erin you promised! You said you werent going to leave!" Tears were pouring from Virgil's eyes, his chest was tight, he could barely see straight.

"I never promised anything for a baby!." And then Virgil was on the sidewalk, leaning against the building with his head in his hands. He couldn't go back inside to get his things, that was for sure.

"I'm so sorry. . ." He whispered, holding a hand to his stomach. They were supposed to be a family, they were supposed to be happy together. He was only twenty, he couldnt take care of a baby.

Virgil waited for himself to calm down, staring up at the sky in the hopes that no one would look at him.

When he finally calmed down he made his way to the nearest hotel he could find, he supposed it was lucky he'd always remembered his friend's advice of keeping the large bills in bras, Erin had always hated looking at those. Virgil pulled out a few before walking inside, covering up with his hoodie so it didnt look strange.

"How many nights can this cover?" Virgil said to the woman at the desk, placing a few twenties on the counter. He bit his lip, not really expecting an answer.

The woman looked him up and down, a sympathetic look in her pale green eyes.

"Stay as long as you need sweetheart, I'll cover it for you," Virgil let out a sigh of relief, he felt like he was about to start crying.

"Thank you thank you thank you-" he stopped himself from adding anymore thank yous at the last minute.

"Do you need anything special in particular?" Asked the woman, Virgil scanned for her name tag, Mrs. Evans.

"I uh-" he paused, shuffling his feet. He wasnt sure this would count as special arrangements or get him turned away. Subconsciously he pulled his hoodie further over his stomach.

Mrs. Evans' eyes widened, a look of realization dawning on her face. She ducked under the counter and thrust a key into his hands.

"Here you go, room 13, and dont you worry about meals or anything, it's all free," she pushed a few magazines toward him, a quick scan of the covers showed him a few job opportunities. Virgil merely nodded, scooping up the magazines and rushing off to the room, he heard Mrs. Evan's making a call in the distance, she sounded worried, he felt a twinge of guilt in his chest.

The room was larger than he'd expected for only having one bed. There was a tv, multiple appliances, including a coffee machine, and of course, a bathroom. Virgil sat down in the couch at the corner of the room, opening the blinds slightly before holding his hands to his face.

"Oh gods what am I going to do for clothes? I cant go looking for jobs yet! I wouldnt even be able to stay that long!" He didnt really know who he was talking to, there was no one else in the room.

He got an answer to his question a few days later when what seemed to be a trash bag full of clothing showed up on his doorstep. He picked up the card attached to it, but all that was there was the image of a heart bursting into flames, with a crown around its middle. Virgil shrugged and dragged the clothes into the room. It was mostly hoodies and overly large t-shirts, but there were a few outfits in an appropriate size as well. He set to work on hanging them all up, ignoring the pain in his stomach.

The real problem started a few months later. He'd been laying on his bed watching the tv and flipping through a magazine when he felt it, the baby was coming.

He didn't think he'd have time to get to the hospital, but he remembered an offer Mrs. Evan's, or Cassira as he knew her now, had made a few days after he'd gotten there. He buzzed the front desk quickly and in a matter of minutes, there she was.

Virgil didnt remember much else, if he was being honest with himself he'd probably passed out. When he opened his eyes he was laying in the bath tub, a mess of towels and a pair of underwear and sweatpants discarded on the floor. He blinked a few times, and then he heard crying.

"Shhh, shhh, it's ok little one,look, daddy's awake, its ok," Cassira was holding something swaddled in Virgil's hoodie, she passed it over to him and he held the small child in his arms.

"Its a girl," Cassira said, not putting much emphasis on the last word.

"Hi," Virigl said softly, looking at the mini version of himself swaddled in the jacket. She had the same soft face, and the same purple and green heterochromia, though her hair was a more jet black color, like Erin's. She smiled as she looked at Virgil, letting out a laugh somewhat like wind chimes.

"You let me know if you need anything," said Cassira. Virgil nodded and watched her leave.

He sat there for a while, watching the bundle in his arms with a fond smile on his face.

"I think we'll call you, Olivia," Virgil said, holding her close.

It took him a few minutes to finally get out of the tub, clean up, and redress himself, all the while keeping Olivia safe.

About six years had passed, Virgil was working full time at a retail job, the only thing he could get while he was working on a degree in Education. When he wasnt working or studying, all of his time went to Olivia. While they were still living at the hotel, Virgil had finally started earning enough to pay for her clothes and schooling and at least a few toys. He was looking into houses as well, he couldn't live in Room 13 for the rest of his life, even if it was free.

Virgil watched Olivia play with a rubik's cube he'd bought her as he wandered the aisles of the shopping center, uncomfortably aware of the people around him.

"Remus I'm just saying! It's not that bad of an idea!" Virgil stopped the cart just moments before a tall man with dark crimson hair and green eyes walked out in front of it.

"Hey! Watch where you're going!" Virgil growled.

The man stopped "Remus I'm gonna have to call you back," he said, hanging up the phone.

"Sorry about that," he said.

"And who is this little princess," the man turned his attention to Olivia, who was sticking her tongue out in concentration over the colorful block in her hands.

"'m Olivia," she said quietly, giggling.

"And we were just leaving," Virgil said, anxious to get out of the aisle. Whoever this man was, he didnt want to be near him for to long.

The man opened his mouth to speak, but Virgil was already pushing past him.

But that wasnt the last time he'd meet the man. The two started seeing each other at nearly every store, on the way to the movies, and eventually, at the hotel itself.

"Ok, can you just admit you're stalking me like some freak or are you just going to act all innocent every time we bump into each other," Virgil said, covering Olivia's ears.

"I'm not doing it on purpose!" Said the man, Virgil took a step back.

"Wait- I didnt mean-" the man paused for a second, looking at his hands.

"Look, I'm not intentionally trying to meet up with you, though you seem like a nice guy, my name is Roman Prince-Duke, I run a modeling agency with my brother," Roman said, tapping his fingers together.

"Oh?" Virgil raised an eyebrow slightly.

"I wasnt taking pictures of you! I mean I'd like to- but like as a job! Not in a creepy way!" Virgil's face went red. This seemed to catch Olivia's attention, as she finally stopped fumbling with his hoodie strings to look over at Roman.

"Daddy's gonna marry a prince," she whispered, causing the blush on Virgil's face to grow even further. Roman let out a small chuckle, covering his mouth.

"Ollie that's not how it works sweetie," Virgil said with a laugh.

"So how much would I be paid? What are the requirements?" Virgil asked.

"Fifty dollars per photo, and you get to make the decision on outfits used and pose adjustments," Roman said.

"Alright, I'll bite," Virgil said, if he was honest, he'd do anything to get out of his current job.

It was about a week before he could finally make the shift. He'd decided to bring Olivia with him to the building. It was large and ornate, posters of attractive men and women were smiling down at him. But it was different, the people in the photos were dancing, singing, they were acting like people. Virgil pushed the door open, snatching Olivia out just before she started spinning it in circles.

"Daddy look!" Olivia pointed upwards towards a fountain at the center of the room.

"I see it Ollie," Virgil said, smiling. He walked to the front desk, where a short man with light brown hair and round glasses was typing away at a computer.

Virgil was about to open his mouth before the boy looked up, and noticed Olivia.

"Oh my gosh look at you! Arent you just the cutest thing!" Olivia giggled as the man ruffled her hair.

"You must be Virgil then? Roman's been absolutely raving about you," said the man.

"Did I hear my name Patton?" Roman said as he walked into the room, and then he noticed Virgil.

"Virgil! Lovely!" He clasped his hands together.

"Come with me, Patton can take care of Olivia while we're at our meeting," Roman said. Virgil stood there for a few seconds, looking between Patton and Olivia before finally letting go of her hand. She rushed behind the desk and stood on her tiptoes to stare at the computer.

Roman's office was covered in decorations of mythical creatures and outfit designs. In the center es a desk with two large and comfy looking chairs in front and behind it. Virgil sat down in the one in front, watching as Roman made his way to the opposite one.

"So, first things, you seem to be more into comfort yes? Overly large sweaters, t-shirts, sweatpants, that kind of thing?" Virgil nodded.

"Anything you absolutely wont do? Any aversions to skirts? Dresses?" Roman continued.

"As long as it's not form fitting and you cant see anything on my chest or below my waist I dont care," Virgil replied. Roman nodded and wrote something down.

Virgil had been at the job for about two months when he noticed the changes. He'd already known that he thought Roman was hot, but now Roman seemed to want to be around him more as well.

They went out for ice cream after photo shoots, Roman came with Virgil to pick out a new house, if Virgil needed a break Roman would let Patton watch Olivia so they two of them could have spa days.

Virgil had been suppressing it for a while, he didnt want to believe he was falling in love again, or that a boy was falling in love with him. He was afraid, afraid Roman would become the new Erin. But fate seemed to have other plans.

They were relaxing in a hot tub, Virgil's back pressed up against one of the jets, head resting on the outer rim.

"Virgil, I've been planning on this for a while, and I think now might be the best time to tell you," Roman spoke softly, but Virgil could still feel his limbs tense.

"You can say no if you want, I wont mind, but I think- I think I want to go on a date with you, like an official one," Virgil looked up, clutching the edge of the 'seat'.

"Well- I uh- I mean you're very nice but I-" Virgil could feel tears forming in his eyes.

"Oh no no Virgil- dont cry- I understand, you dont have to, we can just be friends," Roman pushed Virgil's hair out of his face, worried evident in his eyes.

"I-I do want to be more than friends- but I-" Roman's eyes widened suddenly, his hand instinctively moving to Virgil's side, his thumb brushing against Virgil's stomach.

"I wont, I swear, you have my permission to chuck me off a building if I do," Roman said, earning a laugh from Virgil.

Virgil wrapped his arms around Roman's neck, pressing their foreheads together and smiling.

"Then yes, I will date you," and Roman pulled Virgil into a kiss that would only be rivaled by the one they shared ten years later, with Olivia by Virgil's side, and her girlfriend by Roman's, as Virgil finally realized he'd found the man who would keep him and his daughter safe for as long as the family lived.

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Tag list:

@nerosdayinhell

@meowthefluffy

@youtuberswithalex

@thecolorfulolive

@frog-candy-bee

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@boobmaster69

@melodiread

@thefivecalls

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kweebtrash · 4 years

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Blind Leading the Blind

WonwooxReader

Summary: basically a cute/nerdy/awkward moment between two people who cant fucking see without their glasses and are nervous about hooking up for the first time

Words: 2.3k (drabble)

Features: really awkward hookups, nerdy!wonwoo, nerdy/shy reader, both wonwoo and reader being clumsy as all hell, heavy making out/grinding/caressing, fingering/stroking, some nipple sucking

Masterlist Buy Me a Ko-Fi

Wonwoo fumbled with the door to his bedroom, struggling to grab onto the knob. It was rather difficult with his lips on mine and him pushing me against the wood but we had been so wrapped up in each other we almost didnt notice. My arms were around his neck, pulling him as tight as possible to my heated body. He was making me never want to come up from air but he did just that and made me chase after his lips. "H-hold on! S-sorry, just hold on a second. My hand is kinda sweaty and i cant-" He jerked the doorknob and twisted it, opening the door. "I couldnt get it open. But um...here we are." He chuckled awkwardly and held out his hand for me to view his simple university dormroom. It was a shared space that resembled a small apartment more than anything. His actual bedroom however still had a bunk bed which seemed annoyingly small for his tall frame. Not the most attractive place to have sex in but it would have to do.

I stepped into his room and adjusted my glasses shyly. I never expected us to get so far as to wanting to come back to his place. We had seen a movie at the local theater, had terrible university food, then walked around campus. He was a perfect gentleman. A perfectly gorgeous hot gentleman. Someone who was respectful and kind and turned me on just by being his dorky self. A sweet kiss goodnight lingered for far longer than intended and when the need grew too much to bare we decided to end the date on a more sensual note. He came into the room after me and we stood around for a moment, chuckling nervously and not knowing how to exactly pick back up where we left off.

He shrugged off his jacket and asked me if i wanted something to drink which i denied. An uneasy silence filled the room and i chewed my lip in ponderance. "Um so..." I began softly. "Do you want to...keep going, maybe?" I hoped he said yes. I had felt his strong and muscled arms beneath the thin shirt he wore during our first embrace and i was determined to have them trap me against his body once more.

"Oh! Yes. Yeah. Yes. Um...yes keep going. Thats cool. Youre cool. God sorry, i keep talking because i'm-" I cut him off with another kiss, reaching up to cup his face in my hands. His slightly full lips were soft and tender. It felt as if they were made to be on mine, a perfect fit like the final piece of a puzzle. His hands didnt seem to know where to rest at. They roamed from my shoulders to the center of my back then lower to my ass before he changed his mind and went back up to my shoulders.

"You can uh...touch my ass if you want. Like grab it...or w-whatever." I blushed.

"Oh? I didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

"Youre not." I shook my head. "In fact youre making me want you more. Youre cute when youre flustered."

"youre cute in general." He responded quickly, his own face turning rose as well. I gave him a small peck as a thank you for the compliment and took his hand.

"do you think we might be more comfortable on the bed?" He nodded and let me lead, ducking his head to avoid the upper bunk as he joined me on the mattress. We sat on the edge, again wondering where our hands and lips should go. A few more tentative touches and he settled on my hips while his tongue nudged its way past my teeth. With a bit more confidence he added some control to the kiss, making sure that he could trap my tongue in a few sucks and lure soft whimpers out of me. Every time i made a small sound his grip on me grew tighter and he was slowly moving me down to meet the mattress.

He tried to shift on top of me smoothly but the frames of our glasses jutted together and made the lens smack against my eye. We drew back from one another, eyes squinting and trying to rub the slight pain away. "S-sorry about that. I meant to go down a little be easier."

"im sure you'll go down fine." I said, not realizing the double entendre right away as i blinked clarity back into my eye. "I mean um...just lay on top of me! Well i mean, you know what i mean!"

"yeah, yeah! Totally. Do you think we should take off our glasses? Maybe that would be better." Wonwoo offered.

"We wouldnt be able to see each other at all. Wed both be one big blur." I laughed knowing that our eyesights were utterly terrible.

"Feeling around might be more fun though." His deep voice had lowered into a whisper and he nipped at his bottom lip. I was starting to like the way he was thinking. We removed our glasses and set them on the desk that was just a few inches away from his bunk. The blurriness helped a bit. Though i loved his good looks, it did shave off some nervousness between us.

He set himself between my legs and watched my reaction as the tips of his fingers disappeared under the loose skirt of my dress. His thumb stroked the smooth skin of my inner thigh making my hips buck ever so slightly when he would get close to my panties. I panted softly against his lips as my fingers trembled through opening the buttons on his shirt. Once they were free i shoved the shirt away. He struggled to get his arms out the sleeves and hit his knuckles on the bunk above as he had been flailing out of them. He huffed once he was free, rubbing his knuckles momentarily, and tossed the shirt on the floor. As he returned to kiss along my jawline i wrapped my arms beneath his, holding onto his biceps tight. The way his muscles flexed under my fingers had my stomach clenching in earnest. I wanted him badly and though i had never slept with anyone on the first date i knew i wanted him to have the first experience, especially because i got the sense he wasnt a jerk who wouldnt call me back.

Being bolder i slid one hand into the minimal space between our hips and groped the center of his pants; not too harsh but just enough to get his attention right away. "Wonwoo..." I mewled. "Can we...?"

His whole face flushed crimson, traveling all the way to the tips of his ears. He stared at my hand then at my face then back at my hand again. I grew nervous that I had made him uncomfortable and went to move away from him but he gripped my wrist lightly and kept me right where I was. I smirked and worked my palm over him, watching the way his eyes fell closed and lips parted slightly. The baritone sound was perfect and I longed to make him repeat it as much as possible. He moved his hips into me even going so far as to pluck open the button of his jeans and pulling the zipper down. My heart did somersaults at the prospect of seeing him fully. I swallowed hard, starting to chicken out, and diverted my eyes. It was far from my first time but I was still a rather shy person and when he made to pull my panties down I snapped my legs shut. “Do you want to s-shut off the lights?”

“Huh? Why? I want to see you. You’re beautiful...” He replied softly.

I covered my face at the compliment. “I-I mean...i-it’s like you said, it’s more fun to feel, right? Besides not like we can see much now.”

“Well, if that’s what you want...” He agreed with a slight pout. He left the bed to shut off the light and I made quick work of removing my dress. I laid back on the bed once the room was in darkness, waiting for Wonwoo’s return. I heard shuffling and small grunts of frustration as well as the sound of fabric waving around.

“Wonwoo, what are you doing?”

“Taking off my-!” Another small grunt. “My pants! I got them off now. It’s ok.” He breathed a sigh of relief which was right before I heard a loud thud and Wonwoo cursing.

I sat up quickly and tried reaching out to him. “What happened?!”

“I hit my head on the stupid bed! God that hurt!”

“Oh god, Wonwoo, come here.” I cooed at him. “And please duck your head.” I felt the bed dip as he moved onto it, unharmed this time. I pulled him close and kissed his forehead, trying to soothe the damage as i giggled. "Poor baby."

He huffed. "Sorry im an idiot."

"A cute idiot." I compromised. "A very cute idiot." I kissed along his strong jawline and cupped his neck gently while leaning into him. I decided it was my turn to be on top and stunned him once i straddled his hips. I moved his hands to settle on my hips as i pressed our chests together and decorated his neck with small bites. The cover of the darkness increased the spark between us and we filled each others mouths with moans and whimpers.

Much to my surprise, his hold on me allowed him to guide me into rough grinds against him. He was beginning to stir beneath me, filling out his underwear more and more until i felt every inch of him between my thighs. His fingernails etched half moons into my hips as he begged for me to pull my panties off. I hummed in agreement and kissed my way down his neck to his chest and toned stomach before scooting away to pull off the impeding garment. He turned on his side to face me, instantly placing his long fingers between my slowly forming wetness, drawing them through my lower lips and making shudders run through me.

My hand returned to his hardness, gripping the outline of his shaft and stroking him in conjunction with my own pleasure. i spread my legs wider, giving him more room to slip a single finger inside my willing hole. I mewled his name, trying not to be too loud in case any of his roommates had come home. It was getting hard though with the way he was curling his finger and pulling down the cup of my bra to suckle at my breast. With my free hand i dug my fingers into his thick hair, fisting the locks tightly as i arched my chest into his mouth.

I rubbed my thumb over the tip of his cock, drifting over the small slit that had begun to leak. He tensed then, muscles within his thighs trembling ever so slightly. "P-please..."

"Hmm?" I kissed his cheek and nudged my forehead against his.

"C-could you...? Would you...? I mean you dont have to-i dont want to make you uncomfortable-but maybe, if you want, um..."

"Do you want me to suck you off?"

Wonwoo chuckled nervously. "A-ah...y-yeah. Thats what i meant to say."

"Will you keep touching me while i do it? Your fingers feel...really good." I buried his face in his chest even though he couldnt see my embarrassment in the dark. We were both fumbling idiots that could barely get through anything sexual without something triggering our nervousness. It was almost comical. I was glad we could at least say what we wanted from each other even if it was through stutters and mumbles.

“Yeah, of course. I want you to feel good too.” He assured me.

I switched my position to lower my head towards his cock while my ass wiggled closer to his chest. His finger resumed its position inside me, being joined by another to stretch the small space open. As he pleasured the soft walls within me, i guided him into my mouth, wrapping my lips around the thickness of his head. He kicked off his underwear and spread his legs more, giving me room to stroke what couldnt fit in my mouth. The feel of his girth against my tongue had me struggling to hollow out my cheeks but i bounced my head away, wanting him to feel the utmost pleasure. With us being wrapped up in the intensity of our sensuality we barely noticed the door opening or the light flickering on until we heard an "Oh fuck!!"

Wonwoo and i both shot up, squinting hard to see a tall figure now a few feet in front of us. I screamed and tried to cover myself and Wonwoo as quickly as possible. “Mingyu!?” He shouted. “You couldn’t have knocked?!”

“I didn’t know you were getting laid! Besides it’s my room too!...Wait.” Wonwoo’s roommate seemed to have a revelation. “Dude, you’re getting laid! Finally!” We watched as he ran out the room screaming, “Yo Vernon! Wonwoo’s finally getting laid!”

Wonwoo groaned and flopped back onto the mattress, covering his face with a pillow as he groaned deeply. Though we may not have been able to see without our glasses, it didn’t take 20/20 vision to see that we couldn’t have a night to ourselves without something going wrong.

#wonwoo #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo svt #wonwoo seventeen #seventeen #svt fanfic #svt fanfiction #seventeen fanfic #seventeen fanfiction #svt drabble #seventeen drabble #wonwoo smut #wonwoo fanfic #wonwoo fanfiction #jeon wonwoo fanfic #jeon wonwoo fanfiction #jeon wonwoo smut

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strayficks · 5 years

Text

EPHEMERAL 2 • JAEHYUN

Tysm for anons who had given me ideas!! and my asks is always open, feedback would be greatly appreciated ✊🥺💝

Part(s): 1 . 2 . 3

Genre: smut ✌

Pairings: bad boy!Jung Jaehyun × fem reader.

Jaehyun couldnt stop thinking about her. When Mark asked him what he was doing that night, he didnt say anything. He stayed vague and silent about it.

Maybe it’s the fact that he wants her to himself, or the fact that he always gets turned on everytime he thinks of her. Either way, Jaehyun found her interesting. When she left Jaehyun alone at the park, he watched her leave with nothing but confusion on his mind. Still, Jaehyun doesnt know her name yet.

He asked about her to Yukhei, he’s the last person Jaehyun trusted about telling things about her, but he’s the only person that knows about these things. To no avail, Yukhei doesnt recognize her. Jaehyun tried to describe her as best as possible. ‘Like.. this tall, she smokes, bold as fuck. Are you sure you dont know her?’ Jaehyun had asked Yukhei.

Yukhei stayed silent when he asked it, but when Yukhei asked him if she has her nose pierced, Jaehyun was esctatic. ‘Yeah, she’s my friend’s friend. Dont know her name. You definitely have a type, man.’ Does Jaehyun really? He had been on a couple relationships, but her? He had never met someone like her. So fascinating, so.. brave and alluring.

He cant stop thinking about her since she sucked him off at the park, sure, the sex was a bonus and all, but he’s hooked. Adamant on finding her again. But Jaehyun doesnt know what he’s going to do if he did meet her again. Probably have a nice little talk, or fuck her again until she came. The words rung in his head. ‘No’ she had said.

Jaehyun knew that was a lie the moment it came out her mouth. He rembered her legs being wobbly after he was out of her, the way her cunt tightened around his cock the same time he came. She’s a tease it seems. So when Yukhei told Jaehyun that there’s a party going on on friday, mentioning that his friend will come and the possibility that the pierced girl tag along, he was more than eager to meet her again.

“Fuck no!”

“Fuck yes! Look at yourselves.”

Jihyo rolled her eyes at your response. Your dress was the least conservative out of the group, even though it hugged every inch of your body as if it were a second skin, the girlsbdresses, however, consisted of much less fabric than yours. Ryunjin’s pink slip dress hugs her ass so well, and Jihyo’s little red number exposed so much cleavage you thought you were going to go blind if you stared too long.

Though they were barely covered, you had strange feeling that plenty of other girls at the party would be wearing much less.

The drive to the house was short, but the crowd to get into it went down the block and wrapped around the corner. There were a few cries as the the three of you entered the room. All eyes were on the three, well, mainly you and you know it. Some gazes are filled with lust and admiration, some filled with envy and jealousy. People dont affect you. In fact, their stares and whispers only made you more confident. You pulled your most charming smile, raised your chin and swayed your hips as you walked.

“I should’ve plucked your eyebrows if i knew this much people stare at you on a daily basis, Y/N.” Ryunjin snickered beside you as she nudged her shoulders with yours.

You fake a pained expression as you put a hand on your chest.

“How dare you! My eyebrows are better untouched!”

You felt Jihyo’s delicate hand squeeze your arm as she looked to a spot, a look on her face as she opened her mouth to speak.

“Fucking hell. It’s Hyunjin.”

That was when you saw him. Maybe you were hallucinating, but standing less than fifteen feet away with his arm around some random brunette and his eyes locked on you was the last person you wanted to see.

Surprisingly, it wasn’t Jung Jaehyun like you hoped. You stood frozen as you watched Hwang Hyunjin shove the girl away, not noticing the dirty look you gave him in response. Even if he had noticed, he probably wouldn’t have cared. It wasn’t like he had a heart. Hyunjin had been the main reason behind your sudden change of look, your ‘bad girl’ nature.

Your one year of involvement with him had resulted in you being arrested for various crimes, nearly being expelled from yet another school, losing your virginity in the backseat of his Jeep, and ultimately getting your heart shattered when you found him sleeping with your supposed best friend. To put it lightly, Hwang Hyunjin had kind of ruined your life, and now here he was.

Dont get it wrong. You changed because you wanted to. You realized that you need to change, and you did. You turned into a butterfly and you were free without him. If you hadn’t dated him, you wouldnt be the person you are now, and somehow you were thankful. Because without him, you wouldnt be able to grow up and snap out of the fantasy that you dreamed of.

“At least i look fucking hot tonight.” You said nonchalantly, “Gonna get a drink, be right back.”

Every muscle in Jaehyun’s body seemed to relax upon entering the core of the party, realizing that maybe this was just what he needed.

Yuta noticed the change in mood and clapped a hand on his friend’s back before leading him over to get some drinks. For a long while the duo chatted and drank as they observed the guests who had made an appearance. He took a moment to admire the girls all around them, smirking as his eyes drifted over their bare limbs and glistening skin, but Yuta seemed to be too preoccupied staring at two to even notice the other girls that Jaehyun pointed out.

“Damn,” Yuta murmured. “Those two get hotter every day.”

Jaehyun laughed. “Having fantasies about the those two again, Yuta?”

“How could I not? Doesn’t every guy fantasize about having a threesome?”

“Not really my thing.” Still, he gave Yuta a hard slap on the back.

“But if it’s yours…” Yuta’s grin was brilliant in the darkness

“Hell yes it is.” Soon he was shoving his half-full drink into Jaehyun’s hand and pushing away from the bar.

“If things go according to plan, don’t expect to see me for the rest of the night.” Considering the challenge, Jaehyun expected to see his friend back here in no time. Still, he wasn’t about to sit all night.

Decision made, Jeahyun stepped away from the safety of the bar and made his way into the crowd. It took a few moments to find a decent looking girl in a midriff-baring top, but soon he was pulling her close and joining the writhing mass of movement.

Sadly, it didn’t take long before he was bored again. He gently released the girl on his arm and threaded his way through the crowd again, searching for something a little more entertaining, but the passage of another twenty minutes and a handful of girls left him disappointed.

‘Where is she?’ He muttered to himself. As if on cue, Jaehyun was startled when Yukhei’s hand landed on his shoulder.

“That girl you were looking for? She’s here. Her friends told me just now.” He said, nodding to the two girls chatting with Yuta.

Jaehyun’s heart leaped when he saw her. How he hadn’t noticed the girl before was mystery, but now he couldn’t seem to tear his gaze away. She was leaning against the far wall of the room, a drink in her hand and pure boredom plastered across her face. Her dress clung to her figure in all the right places. It wasn’t until she met his gaze that Jaehyun realized how long he had been staring, still attempting to place her.

Part of him was tempted to look away and pretend like he’d never seen her, but she glanced away before he could even try. He watched as she smirked and passed her empty drink off to nearby partygoer, and had to wonder if it was him she’d been looking at in the first place.

However, those doubts quickly faded when she began moving in his direction. Jaehyun took a hesitant step forward, but even that small shift had caused him to lose her in the crowd. It didn’t help that a new group of girls had surrounded him, each pressing themselves against him in half-assed hugs. He barely avoided being snagged by one of the girls’ black talons as he turned in the opposite direction, praying he’d be able to escape them unscathed.

Unfortunately, the move caused him to bump straight into a pissed-off Hwang Hyunjin

“Watch where you’re going, asshole,” Hyunjin snarled, that hideous lip-piercing glinting under the lights. In an instant Jaehyun’s mood went from vaguely content to sour, all because this sorry excuse for a human decided to open his mouth. So instead of letting him pass, Jaehyun squared his shoulders and stood his ground.

“I think you should leave,” he said, nodding towards the exit Hyunjin’s lips twitched into a sneer.

“Excuse me?”

“Just get the fuck out the party.”

“I’m not leaving,” Hyunjin replied, hitching his chin up in defiance.

“Not until my ex-girlfriend explains why she’s h-”

“I don’t give a damn about you, Hwang,” Jaehyun finally exploded, all traces of patience fleeing.

“Either you walk out that door right now and keep your dignity, or I call the boys and have them throw you out. Your choice.”

Hyunjin’s eyes flitted to something Jaehyun’s shoulder, but he didn’t take the bait to see what had captured Hyunjin’s attention. Instead he waited until the other boy scowled and turned sharply on his heel, stalking towards the exit.

A glance to his left revealed the girl he’d been staring at earlier dancing as if no one was watching with her arms high above her head as her hips swayed to the beat. It didn’t take much to convince himself to go over to her, hoping she could make his night better.

A few steps brought Jaehyun up behind her and he settled a hand on her waist, letting the other drift down to her hips. The girl glanced over her shoulder, offering Jaehyun a slow, unsurprised smile that made his stomach twist into knots.

“You showed him,” she teased, obviously referring to his run in with Hyunjin, her head falling back onto his shoulder He could smell the alcohol on her breath, but her softly drawled words brought a smile to his lips

“You came, you never told me you knew Yukhei.” he murmured, pulling her closer as the heavy bass line resounded in his chest.

Her response caused him to flirt with the notion that this could be Hyunjin’s ex-girlfriend, but the fact that her hips were now grinding against his own made any other concern that didn’t involve getting her into bed disappeared. Jaehyun lost track of time while they dancing.

The music was good, company, and the fact that they’d hardly exchanged any words was even better. The passage of what seemed like an eternity had brought and now jaehyun was finding it hard to move without stumbling or bumping into a neighboring person.

But seemed like the girl having the same problem. He was practically the only thing keeping her from going down in those heels, his arm wrapped possessively around her waist as her hips pressed hard against his.

“Come home with me,” Jaehyun whispered against her ear, hands sliding down her hips. The girl leaned back just enough to meet his eye.

“Why should I?”

“Because you want this as much as I do- and i want to make you cum.”

His hands were on her thighs now, fingers inching up under the material of her dress. It only took her a moment, but she grabbed his hand and smiled, taking a shaky step backward as she tugged on his hand.

“Then let’s go.” Hand in hand they stumbled out of the house and onto the sidewalk, her giggles echoing down the busy street.

When she realized she had no idea where she was going, Jaehyun took the lead and guided her another block or so down the street to the dormitory. Jaehyun felt her hand slip out of his once they were alone, before he even thought to question it, her mouth was on his and there was no more time for words. A shiver rolled down his spine as she pressed herself against him. The door slammed shut with enough force to shake the room as they staggered towards the bed, his fingers finally managing to snag the minuscule zipper of her dress and yank it down, though much to his chagrin it didn’t instantly pool at her feet.

Her throaty chuckle made it obvious that she was well aware of his annoyance, and the fact that she was doing nothing to help him out only made it worse.

Before he could even think to voice his displeasure, her lips were on his and they were suddenly falling onto the bed, soft pillows absorbing the shock of the fall.

Even though the actual impact hadn’t hurt, something sharp had scraped his cheek, and Jaehyun turned his head to break the kiss, swatting her hands away, he reached up to touch the small cut on his face, startled when he drew back to find blood on his fingers.

His eyes darted up to the girl straddling him, but her gaze was trained on the red-specked spiked ring on her finger. It took her a moment to put two and two together, but a sheepish grin spread over her face when she realized her jewelry had been the culprit.

“Sorry,” she murmured insincerely, slipping the ring off her finger and tossing it to the side as if it were a mere toy.

“Let me make it up to you.”

You met Jaehyun again. You were surprised but surely not disappointed. You chuckle to yourself, remembering Hyunjin’s face after he was kicked out by Jaehyun. You slid your bra off and exposed your breasts to him, you felt him slowly slide his hands up your waist, sending shivers through your body, until his hands cupped both your mounds. His eyes were completely trained on your peaks, watching them like they were more valuable than anything in the world.

“So you know Yukhei?” Without replying to your question, he leaned in and sucked one nipple into his mouth, causing you to gasp and arch your back. He flicked his tongue slowly against it, torturing you

“God,” you moaned, curling your toes when his teeth taunted your hard nipple, sharply biting into it, causing a zing of delicious pain to shoot through you.

“Ah, Jae..”

The flick of his tongue and the squeeze of his palm made moisture flow to your core and soak your already soaking panties. Beneath you, you could feel his erection growing, pressing against said core, almost as if it knew where it wanted to go all by itself. The suspense was killing you.

“Jaehyun,” you moaned again when he switched to your other breast, giving it the same amount of attention with his and teeth. Finally pulling away from you, kneeling above you as Jaehyun looked down at your underwear.

“Fuck, youre gorgeous,” He noted in a deep, aroused voice. His eyes lustfully trailed over your figure, your skin, down to the spot between your legs. You felt scorched.

“But I think I’m going to need to take it off you.”

“Only if you take off those, too,” you rebuffed and eyed his briefs where behind the cotton. You could see a very large bulge making a tent out of the fabric.

“Fair trade,” He said and then split his mouth into a panty dissolving smirk, before he begun tugging at his briefs.

You begun working on your panties as well, but had to stop when he stepped off the bed to discard his briefs, allowing your full view of his-ahem ‘Cock.’ Heart beating rapidly, you couldn’t help but stare. He was thick and gloriously erect, the head of him glistening with precum.

The heavy sac underneath was what thoroughly finished him off as being the biggest you had ever seen, you havent taken a good look when you first had sex with him at the park, but seeing him now, damn, He has such a beautiful cock.

You deftly stepped out of your panties and then walked up to Jaehyun again. You were now completely naked. His hands came around your legs and smoothed their way up to the rounds of your ass.

He cupped your butt like two delicious, juicy fruits and then squeezed them hard, causing a moan to rip from your throat. You grasped onto his shoulders for support and then let out a startled squeak when he ceased you and hurled you around on the bed. You landed flat on her back, and not one moment later, Jaehyun was on you.

“Jae, oh shit!” You gasped and then cried out a moan when he parted your legs and buried his face in your cunt.

A small scream rippled from your throat and you desperately clutched onto his shoulders as Jaehyun pushed his tongue into your core and made your stomach pool with heat. All your nerve endings seemed to meet when he moved up to your clit and flicked the sensitive bud before sucking it into his mouth, rolling it in between his teeth.

He lapped up all your juices while all you could do was writhe, scream, and pray that the sex-gods would show you mercy tonight, because this is going to be a wild one.

He suddenly flung your legs over his broad shoulders as you hazily opened your eyes from the ecstacy. The sound of the foil being ripped can be heard as he positioned himself in front of your entrance.

“You said you didnt cum? I wont hold back this time.” He stated. automatically cinching hips. His mouth found yours again, dominating you once more. She gripped onto his shoulders, dragging your fingers up through his hair.

And then in a wild thrust, he was inside you. You cried out, Jaehyun ramming into you hard and repeatedly. You hung onto him, your lips parting in hitched breaths. You clawed your nails down his chest, just like his teeth bit into your neck.

“Fuck, Jaehyun!” You hollered, throwing your head back, you couldn’t control your movements. He was hitting you so good, exploding stars started decorating your vision.

He felt so deep and so perfectly, long and thick inside you.His aggressiveness had you pining for him. Hard was the only way you wanted it. For now, anyway. Both your mouths found each other again and Jaehyun savored every part of you, the fast, furious strokes of his cock inside you quick. You could feel herself get close, you manage to corak out, letting him know what he’s doing to you.

“Jae… fuck, almost there, yes, oh fuck, yeeeees!” Jaehyun pounded into you grunting while you dipped your head deeper into his bed. Even then, high, pitchy sounds kept coming out of your mouth in short breaths as he fucked you into oblivion.

His fingers drilled into you breast, leaving more bruises as his hips and strokes finally pushed him over the edge well, joining you in your climax, his bldy going rigid as you felt the muted splurts of his cum inside you.

“Hey…maybe we can go get coffee sometime?” he offered, simply just trying to catch his breath. Sweat and bite marks covered both your bodies, scratches down Jaehyun’s back as well.

“I have to get back to my friends, they’re probably looking for me.” You said gruffly, an excuse just flung put of your mouth. Picking up your discarded clothing on the floor. Your voice was unattached, like you wanted it.

“Wait- at least tell me your name.” You pulled away from him, forcing him to let go of you. You then quickly put on your bra and dress, palming you panties in your hand while Jaehyun simply just stood there, trying to comprehend what just happened. You then ran a hand through your hair, straightening it, not regarding him with a look, for some reason. You looked like you were going to leave without saying anything at all. Jaehyun frowned.

“Wha- why…” The words froze on his tongue when your eyes met his. You quickly gave your panties to his open palm, covering it with yours as he grasped it tightly, a coy smirk on his plumb lips, the scratch on his cheek still apparent.

“It’s Y/N, I’ll see you around.” And then you stepped around him and slipped out of the room. Closing the door behind you.

#jung jaehyun smut #jung jaehyun #nct 127 smut #nct imagines #nct 127 #nct smut #nct jaehyun #jung yoonoh #jung yoonoh smut #jaehyun smut

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erikismybitch · 5 years

Text

Waiting In Vain : Chapter 16

Bad Day.

Months had passed by. And the duo’s relationship had only went up from the beginning. Marley was surprised that she was not tired of Erik, there was never even a point where she wanted to be away from him. Of course they both had to live their separate lives , but being together was euphoric . Marley had never felt quite like this before , even with other man that she loved . This felt different.

Yes, she knew that it was love .

That’s what she told him, and even though he hadn’t said it back yet , she felt content . Marley couldnt hold how she felt about him in . She had to let him know she loved him one night , while there were laying on her couch . “We good , Marley” was all he said . He just held her tight until she fell sleep in his arms.

Erik showed her how much he cared for her every day. Flowers because it was Wednesday , foot massages when she was tired . Food whenever she was hungry and he even helped her find a new job . Marley was no longer faced with irritable complaints from consumers over the net . And no more slaving for the drunk men down at the bar with Becky.

Marley was now a proud employee at Steinway. Steinway was a global company . A trusted billion dollar business who created technology that controled security systems for some of the worlds most prestigious places . Mass museums, federal reserve, and most of all, protected government agencies .

Marley had a degree , but her major in Liberal arts she knew, would not get her in the door. Erik made her apply anyway .

“They might not even know they need you, always go for the job you think you won’t get” He encouraged her one night , while eating those famous tacos and watching Game of Thrones.

One resume, an exceptional cover letter written by Erik, and two interviews later...Marley was hired to assist the head of public relations. Her duty was only to serve the person who protected the brand of the company . Marley had been there for a while now, and was making a good amount of money.

It was her birthday on this day. She never made a big deal about it . Marley hadn’t had a party since her mom died . So to her , it was just another day . Most people in her life didn’t know when it was, just the few who were close to her . Becky knew and called her early in the morning with a long drawn out version of the birthday song . In the past , Tiana and her aunt didn’t even acknowledge her birthday. Trey would always buy her something expensive, but nothing memorable or noteworthy.

Erik knew that it was her birthday. Of course he was away for work, or whatever he did . Erik admitted... or hinted that his job wasn’t exactly what he told her before . She didn’t press him, but at times she questioned if what he did was legal . The gun was still in his dresser . “It’s not necessarily illegal” he’d toy with her mind whenever she asked him . She was no stranger to crime, seeing as Trey was the poster child for that . But he wasn’t as secretive as Erik . Nor was he as well paid .

Marley hadn’t talked to him all day . After numerous attempts at calling him, she figured he was busy . Until it came to the end of her work day . Her stress level was through the roof , constantly staring at her cellphone. Hoping that the next notification would be from Erik. That’s all she wanted . No party, no gifts , just Him.

Marley had received a birthday card signed by most of the employees . She knew it probably was company policy, but she was thankful . Marley had been there a little under two months , so most people didn’t know her well . To who she assumed was the head of the employee committee, walked by and wished her happy birthday . Marley had just finished typing the notes from the meetings her boss had. It was almost five , and she was off at four thirty .

The days leading up to her birthday were always filled with anxiety . She knew she would cry , she cried on her birthday every year . From loneliness, feeling like she was aging and yet so far behind in life . Most of all, she cried because it was another year without her mom. All day she had been fighting back her tears with fake thoughts of being happy . It was working, for now but she knew that eventually she would break . Becky begged Marley to come to the bar around seven that night . Before the sports crowd packed the bar . Becky wanted to give her gift before her work shift . Marley figured she’d eat fatty bar food and take a few shot alone. Or with some of her old co-workers. Ones who actually knew her and would be semi-genuine .

Since she was leaving later than usual, she was in a rush . The Steinway building was half an hour from her apartment . With traffic she would get home around six, that didn’t give her much time to get ready . Marley logged out of her work computer , gathered her belongings and rushed the halls to the elevator. She dashed through lobby to get to her car . Her phone buzzed in her hand , excitedly she glanced at it , praying that it was Erik . Marley didn’t even see the burly white guy walking towards her . She ran right into him and almost fell to the ground . He seemed to be in a rush much like her . All Marley could see was the back of his red slick hair and the flag of the Netherlands on his arm. Marley knew that because her old college roommate was from the Netherlands and had a flag on her side of the wall .

“Excuse you, fucking jackass!” Marley shouted . The rude guy was already outside of the building. Being the only black women in the lobby, everyone’s eyes were drawn to her already . Even more now since she shouted. She wanted badly to yell at them too for not addressing the man who almost knocked her down .

But , it was her birthday. She had some place to be.

She made it to her car , but she was still boiling with anger . Especially after she gave calling Erik one more shot . He didn’t pick up. “Fuck it!” She screamed , then punched her steering wheel . It honked abruptly, scaring an old woman who was walking by. A groan escaped her lips and she rested her head on the seat . She took a breath, the lump in her throat wanted for her to cry badly . Her lip trembled . Marley missed her mom right now , more than ever . She would make it better . Probably go fight the man who knocked her baby down. Marley laughed at the thought of it . Of those people thought Marley’s outburst was bad , they probably couldn’t have handled her moms .

Marley got herself home, late but it was nothing she could do about it now . She got ready to go to the bar , nothing special but she was cute enough. Her phone buzzed when she walked out of the door . It was nothing but a message from Team Snapchat , probably wishing her happy birthday . She giggled a little because that happened every year . Marley didnt bother to call Erik again, him not answering would only make her more upset.

She made it to the bar . A few cars were parked in the lot. The lights werent on. The windows were tinted but there was a small window space at the top of the building where light would shine through . Which wasn’t odd . Marley had worked shifts when the bar opened late . It was a family owned business and sometimes they were unprofessional and opened when they wanted to . Customers still came though . Marley would even get paid under the table some weeks , so they could avoid tax issues and healthcare costs .

She yanked on the door. It wouldnt budge , it was locked . She knocked on the door hard and announced that it was her.

“I’m coming!”

Becky’s voice rang through the closed door . Marley could hear the tampering of the lock . Becky opened the door wide , exposing the few co-workers who were waiting for Marley to come inside.

“Surprise!” They all shouted at the same time. She couldn’t believe it. A party, for her? She was important enough for them to go out of their way and do this. Becky walked towards her , holding a small chocolate cake with lit candles .

“Chocolate, my favorite, thanks guys!” Marley Jared chocolate cake, but she wouldnt tell them that . Everyone looked so pleased .

“Please don’t cry” Becky playfully rolled her eyes at her friend . Who seemed to be getting emotional

“It’s just-“ Marley began to speak, but got choked up . Her voice shook . She didn’t want to cry in front of everybody, so she quickly sucked it up with a deep breath. Becky couldnt help but laugh . She took her into her arms and hugged her . “I just hate my birthday, that’s all”

Not being able to cry was killing her . She looked around at everyone , overwhelmed at everything . Surrounded by people, she still felt alone . Nobody who loved her was there . Yes , these people cared but not in the way Marley needed .

“Do you want us to stop this ?” One of the other co-workers asked . He could tell by the look on her face that something was off. Marley shook her head quickly

“No, I’m thankful for everything” Marley put forth effort to place a smile on her face.

Marley took the time to hug everyone and thank them individually. They all started off with a shot of dark and they sang the birthday song to her . Which was always awkward. Then Becky did her renditioned version of the birthday song , where she twerked across the bar to brighten the mood .

Marley made a wish in her head, something she thought was so silly . When she was a teen she always wished that her mom would magically come back from the dead . Now that she was older , she knew it was impossible . But she still made that same wish . Then she wondered , if she could do two . There were no actually birthday rules because all of it is fake... right? She thought about something that would make her happy . Erik. He was real . And she wished that he would remain that way . Marley blew out the candles and they cheered .

“I’m sorry he’s not here” it was as if Becky could read her mind “And I had no way to tell him , I figured he would be with you” Marley ignored her. She gave Marley a small gift box , with a bow on top . It was from her . She opened it right away .

“No you didn’t” she said quietly. It was a pair of AirPods . She had just told Becky that she wanted a pair but didn’t want to spend the money on them. The fact that she was such an attentive friend really meant a lot to Marley . She could not stop hugging her .

“Tonight is not about him, it’s your birthday” Becky didn’t want the absence of Erik to ruin her special day.

“What if he’s dead?” Now Marley was being dramatic . Becky raised her eyebrows, she figured Erik couldn’t make it because of work stuff . Not anything this serious . “I haven’t heard from him all day”

“Doubt that” Becky casually handed Marley an envelope with a card inside . She figured it was a card from the bar staff.

“But still, this is not like him” she managed to rip it open while holding eye contact .

“He’ll call “

Marley pulled the card out if it’s envelope. Shockingly it was from Trey . She looked at Becky who was purposely avoiding eye contact . A few twenty dollar bills slipped from the inside before she caught them in her hand. They had not spoken since that last week of her living in the hotel . And when she found out about his child , she was completely done . “Trey came by before you got here, he wanted to catch you but I told him it wasn’t a good idea” Becky aligned a few shot glasses on the bar and filled them with Tequila . That always got Marley drunk , and her plan was to get her friend wasted .

Happy birthday beautiful

I miss you , call me.

He had hand written those simple words in the card. Along with some passage about how important the birthday person was. Marley skimmed through it, then slipped the twenties in her purse and put the card in the trash .

“No thank you” Marley spoke just how she would if Trey was actually standing there .

It took Becky pouring six shots to get Marley to finally stop checking her phone . And then seven shots to make her start talking about Erik. He always left the toilet seat up and in the middle of the night she would fall in. No matter how many times she told him not to, he would always forget . He always thought he was right , and could never admit that he had gotten something wrong . Marley was not the type of person who yearned for the last word . And it didn’t kill her if she didn’t get her point across. Not even knowing that it was what made them a match . He snored loudly when he slept, so if Marley didn’t fall first ... there would be no sleep . Then when he woke up , he never ate breakfast. Which freaked Marley out because she couldn’t function without breakfast each morning . Marley started to drag on about how much he worked out and perfected over his body . But at the same token, he’d scarf down a whole family sized meal of carbs . She was about to rant about his messy home but Becky stopped her . Even Becky couldn’t help but think about how Marley felt when she talked about her husband .

Becky had listened for long enough , the bar was now open to the public and she had to work . “Sounds to me like you guys have no real problems” she slapped the bar counter twice , Marleys head flew back .

“What!” She slurred, then swayed to the sound of Sicko Mode playing from the bars speakers . Drunk was exactly what she was now.

“Don’t sweat the small stuff , Erik is all you have... besides me of course”

Marley pondered on that statement for a while . She seemed to get lost into the view of her feet for a long time . The floor was spinning, she held on to the bar stool so she wouldn’t fall . She blinked a few times to try and sober up , it didn’t work well enough. Then , she got back to thinking about what Becky said . How Erik was all she had . Marley looked up to ask her what she meant by it, but Becky had walked away . Marley figured she had been out of it for a while . She was uncomfortably drunk , and really needed to go home .

Everyone was back working , and she didn’t have the strength or good balance to say thank you to everyone again . Maybe she’d send out a mass text in the morning, or maybe she wouldn’t. Marley just needed to leave. She snuck out of the bar . Becky would have stopped her from leaving if she saw her . Refusing to allow her to drive home drunk. Marley just knew that if she drove really slow, she’d make it .

So she sat in her car , took a deep breath and started the ignition . Thanking god that she lived close enough . Even though she knew god was not happy about what she was doing . Marley pulled out of her parking space slowly and made her way on to the street . She was doing great at pretending to be sober . Until she couldn’t , swerving in other lanes and unnecessarily pumping her breaks with caution. Tonight would have been a great night for the police to pull her over and actually do their job. They were probably harassing innocent people Marley thought, Insted of handling true crimes ... like the one Marley was committing in this moment .

She made it home safely , by nothing but pure luck . Her car was crooked , and slightly crossing the line of her neighbors spot . Marley would deal with it in the morning. Her apartment light was on. Since she was intoxicated , she didn’t see this as cautionary. Struggling with getting the key in the door, she managed to let herself in . It wasn’t until after she closed the door and began walking towards her room , that she seen Erik sitting on her couch . He stood up , holding a bouquet of flowers . Marley stepped back with her mouth wide open.

“Happy birthday baby” he smiled and walked towards her . She wanted to speak . She wanted to yell at him for not being there all day . She wanted to ask him how he had gotten inside of her apartment. But as soon as she felt his strong arms wrap around her ... she finally let out the cry that she had been holding in all day . Marley’s tears seeped into the arm of his shirt . He let her cry . “You had a bad day?” He asked her calmly. He felt Marleys head nod . The hand that was flower free rubbed against her back . He was trying his best to calm her down.

“I hate my birthday” her voice cracked , tugging on Erik’s soft side .

“I got you , and I’m gonna take care of you”

He pushed away from her , allowing the space between them . He kissed her forehead twice , then took a chance on her lips . “Wanna talk about it?”

Marley drew away from him and walked to the kitchen for a paper towel . She released with a deep sigh and giggled shortly.

“Nah” she wiped hers tear stained face then tossed it in the trash . Erik told her that he lost his phone this morning , and couldn’t find time to get another one today .

“How did you get in here?” They settled down on the couch. Close enough for Marley’s left thigh to wrap around his lap . She faced him .

“I’m from the projects . Breaking in to shit is like a right of passage” he admitted, nonchalantly he massaged her thigh.

“You broke in my house” she stated what was obvious, there was no reason for her to be upset . She knew Erik to be a man that did whatever he wanted to do.

“Ain’t nothing I can’t get into” he observed her for a second , she rested her head against the couch . Her eyes fidgety and unable to focus on one thing . “You drove home drunk like this ?” He asked , seemingly worried about her .

“I see you do it all the time” her fingers toyed with his dreads . He was so cute to her when he got serious. He was cute to her when he did anything honestly.

“Yeah but you ain’t me”

“The hypocrisy!” She shouted in dramatic form.

“So you using big the words tonight”

“Hypocrisy is not a big word, you’re just from the projects” Marley braced herself for his rebuttal, she knew he would have a comeback to match her witt.

“Don’t forget who helped you write that letter to get you that job. A nigga from the projects”

“You right , daddy” she gave in, even though they were only joking .

“I know I’m fucking right”

Marley rubbed her thumbs against his cheeks and moved in closer to him . “Just a minute ago , I was crying my eyes out” she mumbled , so close to his lips that he could feel her words . She kissed him , sweet and soft . “Make sure I never cry on my birthday again”

“That’s a lot of pressure” Erik told her .

“Can you handle it?” She toyed with him but Marley was being completely serious.

“I can handle you”

Erik yawned , and like clockwork Marley yawned too . It was contagious. Somehow his position changed to him laying completely on his back . Marley beside him still, one leg wrapped around his waist . They liked it that way . No matter where they were , they always came back here . Erik thought Marley had eventually fallen asleep, on account of her hard breathing . Until she spoke again.

“All you got me was flowers?” She thought back to when she first cake in. Marley eyed the beautiful bouquet on her coffee table . He busted out laughing , so hard that Marley had to laugh too .

“I was waiting for that question”

“So answer it then”

“I got you shoes”

“Where they at?” She pouted like a bratty child . Erik kissed his teeth .

“Where the birthday sex at?” He asked , as if she owed him and it was his birthday.

“I’m too tired , how about birthday morning sex?”

“I’ll give you your shoes after that” he rubbed her butt gently , in hopes to turn her on . It just made her more comfortable with the idea of sleep .

“I’m not a prostitute” she yawned again .

“You’re my prostitute”

“You know I am” she boasted proudly .

“The best one I got” he yawned too .

“The thickest one too”

“You such a bad bitch”

“Good night Erik , I love you”

#im still here #sorry this wasnt a good comeback #erik killmonger fanfiction #erik killmonger fanfic #erik killmonger imagine

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fuckapuck · 5 years

Text

Injured

Mikko Rantanen x fem!Reader

Warnings: none. A little sad though

This is my very first fan fic! I got this idea into my head and couldnt get it out so i had to write it up! Idk if its any good i certainly hope it is! Im posting this on mobile so idk how it will look posted. Sorry! Its kinda a long one

Mikko sighed as the doctor stitched up his cheek. It had been a rough game against the preds and he ended up catching a skate balde with his face. It was a nasty gash that went from his temple and on to the corner of his lip.

It hurt and he wasn't ashamed to say he cried.

Lots of local anesthesia and a few stitches later there was just a very dull throbbing in the left side of his face. Some one had come back to tell him the 3rd period started and he desperately wished he could be out there right now. He was taken back to the locker room told to keep his bandages dry and get cleaned up and changed.

He shed a few more tears out of frustration. He knew he would have to sit out a few games to let this heal a bit before he could get back out on the ice. He grabed his phone. He didn't have any texts or missed calls from (Y/N) as he expected. You were working tonight and wouldnt get off till almost 2 am, so you wouldn't find out about his injury until your shift was done. Hopefully. You hated that job and Mikko often told you just to quit and not to worry about expenses. He would take care of anything that was needed. He washed up and changed back into regular clothes. He couldnt wait to get back to the hotel and put on soft stretchy clothes. He sat down in his stall and stared at his phone. Should he text (Y/N)? You were working and he didn't want you to worry. There was still had 5 hours left of your shift. He let out another sigh and hung his head as he shut off his screen.

His thoughts were interupted as whoops and cheers came from outside the door. It burst open and his teammates poured in. He smiled as much as he was able and was embraced by a few guys. Gabe and Z took their time talking to him making sure he was doing fine.

"I won't really know how I feel until I'm not numb." He joked with them. His mood was brightening as his captain and friends told the story of their victory. He ignored the pain in his chest for not being there. That he didn't get to see it.

The night continued and interviews were completed. He declined doing one until his face felt better. He was more than happy to use his cheek as an excuse to not talk to media. Normally he didn't care, but he just really didn't want to do it tonight. As the reporters cleared and the team finished getting changed Barbs came over and smacked him on the shoulder.

"Hanging in there Rants?" He smiled at the finn.

"Oh yeah, just a little out of it." He head was a bit fuzzy still but getting clearer and more painful by the minute.

"Nice. They must have given you the good stuff!" Barbs nudged him again and mikko felt more at ease. He could do this. The playful chirping of teammates. He didn't have to think about his face. The light hearted fun continued. Until his name brought his full attention back.

"Huh?" He blinked.

"I said I would help you get back into the single life!" Barbs laughed and a few other joined him. A sudden unease took over mikko.

"What do you mean?" He questioned. The unease growing.

"This." mark poked his own cheek and nodded at mikko. "Gonna be single by morning!"

Mikko stayed silent and just stared. He felt like he couldn't breathe. The guys seemed to see that this particular chrip hit a sensitive spot.

"Fuck barbs! Shut up." Gabe hissed. Mikko zoned out and found himself trapped in his mind. It was a horrible injury to his face. He wouldn't look the same after this. He would be scarred. His mind was reeling and he didn't remember when he got back to the hotel. Only that he made it back. He was in mild pain now the medication wearing off. He hoped he could get to sleep before he could feel all of it. He changed his clothes in a daze and climbed into bed. He stared at the ceiling trying to get to sleep but he couldn't. He just kept thinking about you.

How you would smile at him and kiss his face. How you would grab his cheeks and nuzzle into him calling him beautiful and handsome. His chest felt constricted and he threw the covers off of himself. He laid there as thoughs of you circled his mind. Your words that he so loved to hear now haunting him. You wouldn't think he was beautiful anymore. You wouldn't look fondly at him and caress his face. Would you cry when you saw him? Would you be angry at him for ruining his appearance? What would he do with out you? He heard his phone vibrate he looked over. You were calling him. He moved his eyes back to the ceiling. It stopped and a few minutes later he heard the message notification sound. He ignored it. He couldn't bring himself to see what you had to say.

An uneasey sleep came over him only an hour and a half before he was suppose to get up. He packed quietly and jumped when someone knocked on his door. He opened it to find his coach and a medic. They wanted to check on him.

He was sat down as the doctor went over how to clean and bandage it again. He handed him a bag of perscription pain killers and extra bandages. Coach had a hand on his shoulder. At the end of it he was told he would have to sit out for at least a week and then they would look at how the healing was doing and if everything was good he could go back to playing with a face cage until it was fully healed. Coach gave him some pats on the back and told him to take two or three days after they got back to rest. Take it easy.

He packed silently and watched his hands tremble. You wouldn't leave his mind. Your soft skin and gentle touch. Your laugh and your smiles. How he could always tell how you were feeling because your eyes showed everything. What would they show now? Disgust?

He loaded into the bus. Some of the guys came over to him but he pointed at his cheek and shook his head. The bus arrived at the airport and everyone loaded into the plane. Taking their seat. He put himself buy a window toward the back. Gabe and Nikita sat by him. About 30 minutes in Nikita gently nudged him.

"What barbs said. It was joke you know. He did not mean it." He spoke softly to Mikko. Gabed turned towards them.

"He's right Mikko. You know (Y/N) would never do something like that." Gabe reassured. Mikko closed his eyes and turned his head away from the window and looked at his two friends.

"Tell me the truth. If you were in my place, if this was your faces not mine, would your wives leave?" Mikko asked. His heart beating in his ears he needed the answer.

Nikita and Gabes eyes widened. Z looked down at his hands not saying a word. Gabe opened and closed his mouth trying to think of something to say. Mikko turned back to the window and felt tears stinging his eyes. Yes, they would. They wanted handsome pretty husbands and a scar like the one this will leave will not be pretty. The rest of the flight was silent between them.

Mikko couldn't help but think of the way (Y/N) normally greeted him when he got off the plane. She always tried her best to be there. She always would grab his face, kiss him and give him a tight warm hug. She would tell him that she loved him and promise a delicous home cooked meal. Would it be the same? Would she even be able to look at him?

The plane landed and he dragged himself off of it. They approached where the WAGS would normally wait, but he couldn't look up. He was so afraid that if he did, you wouldn't be there.

He felt a nudge and looked to Nate who nodded his head forward. Mikko looked up and there you were. You were smiling but it was different from normal.

Mikko walked up to you and almost had to hold back tears as you embraced him. It felt just as tight and warm as it always did he felt one hand so very softly touch his uninjured cheek.

"Lets go home okay?" He couldn't look you in the eye. He walked silently by your side and held your hand loosely. There was no kiss. No usual excitement. He felt his world becoming smaller. Maybe if he asked nicely you would let him hold you one last time before you left him forever.

The car ride was quite on his part. Your gentle voice talking softly about little things that had happened in his week away. He couldn't muster up the courage to say anything to you. Afraid it would be the last thing he would ever say to you.

You pulled into his spot at his apartment and attempted to help with his bags But Mikko carefully took them from your hands and carried them himself. The two of you went up to his place. He put his bags on his bed and started to unpack. You came up beside him and started to help. He wanted to object but couldn't. Time passed and soon everything was unpacked and the two of you were sitting on the couch. (Y/N) kept a small one sided conversation going and Mikko mearly stared on.

"What would you like for dinner?" You asked, but Mikko said nothing.

"Mikko? Why won't you talk to me love?" She asked gently and her small, soft fingers gently brushed his uninjured cheek. Suddenly he couldn't help it anymore. It was too much. Why were you still being kind to him if you were going to leave him? He began to cry. He couldn't stop it. Instantly you were there. Holding him and comforting him with kind hands and words. He almost let himself relax into your warm body. But he couldn't. It was too painful.

He stood up abruptly and stared down into shocked concered eyes.

"Just do it already! Stop playing with me and do it!" He tried to sound stern but he just sounded broken.

"What are you talking about? Do what?" You asked and went to reach for him. Mikko stepped back out of your reach.

"End it. End it like you want to. I know you do. Just leave me already and stop making it hurt!" Mikko practically shouted. You stared at him with wide hurt eyes.

"Leave you? Why would I do that?" You asked your voice shaking. Mikko couldn't look at you.

"This," he pointed to his bandage, "my face will be different and ruined. I know you want to leave me. Just do it." He ended quietly and weakly.

"Do you honestly think I'm that shallow?" He could hear the pain in your voice. He just shrugged. "Mikko Rantanen you will look at me right now!" You snapped. Mikkos head shot up he eyes locking with yours. He saw pain and anger in those eyes.

"You listen to me right now. I love you. I have loved you since I met you. Not because of your face, but because of you. How you treat me and talk to me. How you make me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world when I know I'm not. I would never leave you because of an injury! For fucks sake you are a hockey player! Injuries and hockey go hand in hand!" You yelled and got closer to him. "I knew what I signed up for when I started dating you. I'm in it for the long haul and I won't be leaving just because of a scar!" You jabbed him in the chest with your finger and crossed your arms. You deflated a little the anger subsiding and hurt remained.

"Do you really think so little of me Mikko?" You barely whispered out your arms dropping to your sides. Mikko couldn't take it. Your pain and saddness. His doing. He moved suddenly and wrapped you in his arms the good side of his face against the top of your head.

"No. No I don't. I promise. I love you. You are the best woman in the world. The kindest and most wonderful and beautiful. I was just scared. The boys said - " mikko rushed out. You had relaxed against him but the quickly pushed away and look up to him with anger in your eyes.

"What did the boys say?" You ground out. Mikko explained Barbs chirp and Gabe and Z's silence on the plane. Suddenly you weren't in his arms but pacing the living room as he watched on fondly.

"Those stupid little- UGH! Let me tell you if their wives ever find out about that they will be pissed. Fuck! They will give them some scars to worry about. Those absolute idiots! And I'm going to kill barbs. Those kind of jokes aren't funny. I'm gonna kick his ass! I'm going to practice tomorrow and im gonna beat him with his hockey stick!" You ranted on furiously. Mikko just laughed and came up and wrapped his arms around you.

"Please don't kill anyone. I'm very sorry my love. I am very very sorry." You again relaxed in his arms and nuzzled into his chest." I got worried and to into my head and then you didn't kiss me and-"

"Kiss you? Mikko I didn't want to hurt you! Your mouth was injured too not just your cheek!" You laughed at him in exasperation. Mikko blinked down at you.

"Oh."

"Yeah, 'oh.'" You rolled your eyes, and leaned Into him, "I love you mikko and I won't stop." You pressed your face into his chest and his grip tightened.

"I love you too" he swore to himself not to doubt you again. And felt secure in his knowledge that you loved him.

"I am gonna get barberio back though." She warned. He chuckled and press a very soft kiss to her head.

"I know."

#mikko rantanen imagine #mikko rantanen x reader #mikko rantanen #nhl imagine #colorado avalanche #this is m th first one #please be kind #also send in any constructive criticism or advice #love you guys

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jhaymyneutron · 4 years

Text

6 years ago, I experienced my biggest failure, or what I thought to be the biggest. I failed a subject that wouldnt let me stay in the course that I was in during that time. I was so depressed that things werent going the way i wanted it to be. It wasnt how i planned it in my mind.

Failing that subject means that I will be having a hard time shifting to the course that i really wanted to be in. (i was in nursing that time, and I planned to shift to PT in the same university) No one will take a Transcript with a singko. Well, atleast that college in the university that i was in. I had zero idea on what to do with my life, I had nothing for myself. I can no longer stay in nursing because I cant proceed with the cut off system because i had 1 singko (also i really didnt want to lol) I only had 2 choices, either I shift to another course that is not PT or leave my dream university and pursue PT in a different school. I didnt like both so I didnt do anything. I was a mess.

Some would say, if you dont want to leave that university then you shouldve just shifted in another course.

My 2 cents:

Nursing wasnt my cup of tea and I failed because no matter how hard i try to study, things werent just working out for me. It isnt just for me exactly.

Therefore, if i chose to go to another one that i didnt like to be in, in the first place, then I wouldve just repeated the same story but im just in a different uniform.

and so I told my parents, I needed a break. I wanted to find myself and think about what i really want to do. I stopped attending college for a year. But i never heard anything dull from my parents. They just smiled at me and said “go ahead. Do what you need to do”

For a year, I did things for myself. Things happened. I had a roller coaster ride of unexpected scenarios, that luckily I was present and I was able to cover for it because I was on a hiatus. A lot of times i felt useless and “patapon” in that 365 days but there are days that I suddenly realize, aside from trying to find myself, I took a hiatus for some unknown reasons and it was already showing up one by one.

Failing and reflecting was new to me, I realized i felt so entitled even when i dont deserve it. Ive been living as a “what i see is what i get” and it wasnt healthy for me, not even for everyone.

The thing is, UST is my dream school and I dont want to leave UST, but also I couldnt stay. Ive been so stubborn, and it only gave me heartaches because what i want wont always work. I’ve reflected so much, and I asked myself a hundred times, will I really just let myself have this heartache, randomly cry at night and think that im not good enough? When I already have the answer in front of my face and all i have to do is explore new environment and have the courage to take it? And so i left.

I went to a school that i never saw, in a place that i was trying to avoid my whole life because it is damn far. But what kept me going? I started with a boring and uninteresting days, weeks and months in this school. But eventually, i met the most welcoming and undesrtanding people in my life. I had this genuine happiness that I wasnt able to get in my former school, in here, I felt that I belong. Professors were accomodating and remembers our name, even asks us how were doing everyday in the hallways. It was more than a community.

After 4 years, I never failed saying “buti nalang lumipat ako” “i went through all those sad times, to get this super saya experience with the realest barkada”. I met people who accepted me not because they were just simply open but because they feel the same. I even met someone who gave me so much to remember, crazy. Funny twists of fate.

Exactly a year ago. I failed a subject. For the first time in 4 years. One subject that held me in becoming an intern. One subject that separated me from my friends. I cried upon getting the results of my exams. The first time my friends saw me cry, i was bawling my eyes and pouring my heart out in the quiet halls of UG. I was crying, not because I failed, but because i cannot picture myself telling my parents that I failed one subject. I am ashamed to be giving them another burden, when im already at the age of giving them the life they deserve.

I cried and cried, until i finally gave my mom a call. I was nervous, but I had to do it.

“Hello?” My mom answered. I was crying silently and cannot utter a word. “Hello? Jhaymy?” i sniffed a of couple times and my mom figured out i wasnt okay. “Bakit ka umiiyak?” I was biting my tongue while i was sitting in the corner of an empty hallway. I couldnt talk but my mom didnt forced me, she was just at the other line listening silently while im crying. Finally, I told my mom “ma.... sorry. Bumagsak ako ng isang subject” i started letting my mom hear my cry. I kept saying sorry that i couldnt count it anymore. I heard my mom telling my dad why i was crying. My dad simply shouted for me to hear. “Okay lang yon!!!! Isa lang yon!” My mom got mad at, because i kept saying sorry “tigilan mo yang kaka sorry mo. Okay lang yon!!! Wag ka na umiyak jan. Okay lang yon, umuwi ka na wag ka na umiyak jan”, my sisters overseas called me and said “its okay, its normal” “but ate, i want to help you in providing already” “jhaymy, its okay. Kaya pa namin. Dalawa kami. Mag aral ka muna mabuti at okay lang yan. Okay lang kami”.

Months passed, i bid goodbye to my friends and sent them to internship, i felt sad but I realized I wasnt ready. I dont know anything. My supposed to be patients doesnt deserve me. I know nothing. And when I repeated another year, I understood everything. I asked myself where I was the whole time the other year. Totally absent minded.

When i went for another year, i met different people. People whom i never thought Id vibe with. My 4th year season 2, gave me so much learnings, and gave me a chance to build new friendships. This year, I met someone who gave me a different vibe. You know who you are, and if youre reading this im probably gonna be shy, but oh well im just stating facts. Never had the chance to say this to you but, thank you. You made me think that im not always the wrong one and that i was patient. Thanks for letting me have a crush on you hahahahahaha i dont know how long this will take but youre really hard to forget hahahahahahah. Bye. And so if i didnt take another year, I wouldnt have met this great person and i have never been more thankful.

My last cent, whatever happens, it happens for a reason. You may not instantly know why it had to, but one day you will be able to say why it did. And you will smile like a fool for realizing that you took a different way somewhere over the years. but finally, you came in to the perfect place.

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8771eh · 5 years

Text

Feel It In My Bones

@sidgenophotochallenge

The curtain hung limply from the curtain rod above the window in his direct line of sight. It was pulled close and let no hint of light through.

He didnt know if it were day or night and that was fine. He preferred it that way if he were able to really prefer anything at that moment.

What he knew was he had screwed up. Monumentally. He didnt know how he could ever come back from the screw up he had made. He knew he didnt deserve to be involved in the outside world. He needed to stay right where he was, sprawled on the California King mattress with the sheets tangled around his legs.

He could feel how tacky his skin was from the various fluids that had dried across him. He hated that feeling. He deserved to lay with that feeling on him as he was banned from time. Forbade himself from knowing how bright the sun shone or how full the moon was.

But he could still tell. His bones knew where the moon was. Knew how long before it rose or sank in the sky and how close to full, he could feel him too. New but distant, so distant, too distant. But he deserved that now.

He knew what it meant when he signed with the NHL. He knew what part of his life would be locked away. What part wouldnt be allowed to ever find fulfillment and that was ok. It was fine. It was the choice he wanted. It was hockey and the ice and clack of pucks on tape and slice of blades on ice were as deep in his bones as the call of the moon.

He knew being a wolf was one thing, being a wolf who preferred males was going to be difficult but then entering the world of the NHL as a wolf was bad enough to make him agree to lock away his personal desires. To ignore the pull to his friend; his alternate. He who held the position of an alpha's mate in a wolf pack in his team where he was both alpha and captain. It was masochistic. A constant reminder that he had chosen to give up that option when Mario called his name at the draft.

How else was he to respond after years of stuffing and pining when his alternate pressed him against the SUV-toe to toe, knee to thigh, hip to stomach, forehead to forehead before nuzzling his nose to Sid's then going in for a kiss. How else was he supposed to respond when something he had long denied himself offered itself up?

He was a stupid man in many ways but he liked to believe he was not an idiot. He took that which was offered. And it was good. Beyond good. He was a challenge and he made Sid want to be better to prove himself and to luxuriate in the attention he was given. They fit together in so many ways and they knew eachother so well it showed in their movements on that California King mattress. What else was he supposed to do when the words were whispered to bite him. To mark him. Change him. Mate him.

He was stupid and then he proved he was an idiot. Because the sheets were askew and cool except his own body warmth, the sweat and saliva and blood and cum was stiff on his skin and he was alone. As he knew he should be for his promise to hockey. He couldnt have a true mate and when he had allowed himself to hallucinate the one person he wanted verbalize his own wishes he forced his ways on him. He forced him to become something different from who he always was.

And he left.

And now he was alone.

He was lonely. So lonely because he could feel his mate and the distance and knew he had been rejected. It made him ache to howl, to sing his grief to the moon. But he didnt deserve that relief. He deserved to carry this burden and lonesomeness for his actions.

His phone vibrated on the dresser and he haphazardly reached for it. His knuckles dragging across the rich fibers of the sheets, slamming into the wood of the beside table and then fumbling to grasp the phone. The light was bright and caused him to wince.

Taylor: who is it, Squid?

Taylor: dad took mom's phone so she couldnt call you.

Taylor: Sid, it's been 3 days. Who is the new pack member? Do I know them?

He looked at the time stamps spread across three days with more missed calls and voicemails then he wanted to think about.

As he glanced up at the time, his phone started to vibrate. A Skype call with a penguin emoji next to the number 71. He stared at the incoming call, his body feeling a rush of so many emotions before numbing. The call stopped and he felt his exhale shudder.

The phone started to vibrate again and as ant true idiot would he pressed the accept button.

The screen filled with a familiar sight: a bare chest and shoulders and an exhausted expression on the face at the top of the screen. The bruising wound at the juncture of his shoulder and neck the largest and ugliest of the bites, bruises, and scratches scattered across Geno's visible skin. He was sat up in his bed, the pillows propped behind him. His phone on the pillow closest to his shoulder.

'Sid,' Geno started with relief. His smile was as tired as he looked. Sid stared at him unsure of what to do, his voice frozen and his mind syrup slow as he tried to piece together why Geno could be calling. Why he doesnt look angry or disgusted.

'Been trying to call you and you not answer. It's been days, Sid. I'm worrying most about you.' Sid watched as Geno's fingers trace the bite mark near his neck with his finger tips. Sid's eyes transfixed on the delicate and tender brushes. 'Skin feel like is crawling. Like cannot sit still whole flight. Sid, fly to Russia always too long but this feel like not comfortable in own skin further away from Pittsburgh I get. I'm make huge mistake, Sid. Most big mistake and just so sorry.'

His head sinks below his shoulders, his eyes fixed to the mattress below his hand. The rush of emotions surging an against the numbness. His insides twisted with the desire to howl in agony; to release the burn of the confirmed rejection.

'Most stupid for kissing you night before fly home. I'm like most big coward. Not think you feel same way. Mama so mad at me, Sid. She sees your mark when I come home and she hit me.' Geno chuckles fondly. 'She saying like, I'm most stupid for leaving you. Not think of how you think. Is, uh, she say is like not uh,' a string of frustrated Russian flows from his mouth. Sid can feel the faintest push of frustration and helplessness in his bones. 'Like when I'm first come to Penguins and speak no English and we like try so many ways to understand one another but like make so much mistakes. This like that maybe. Now I think maybe she right. Maybe you think one thing that like not right answer because I'm not make like best choice. Need know I'm not hurt you. You not feel like skin want to crawl away. Like your heart is sick because something too far away.' Geno's breathing and small movements under his sheets are the only sounds for a long moment while Sid avoids looking at the screen. His skin prickles, especially the bite over his hip bone. A dull throbbing mixed with a faint attempt of soothing. He can just make out the barest brush of calloused finger tips on his hip. A ghost of their night together or a mate thing, hes not sure.

'Shit.' The rustling of sheets intensifies as Geno stands up. His footsteps sounding against the wooden floor. What sounds like the laptop being placed on a table or counter. 'Shit, Sid. Most stupid. We both are like what Horny always saying? Most hockey smart but most stupid about like heart smarts? How would you want me even tho most stupid mate who hurt you?'

'You left.' Sid stated flatly. 'You left and said nothing. Now you want me to forgive you?' He lifted his gaze to stare intently at Geno. He knew his eyes had flashed with anger and the alpha growling just below his skin. 'You leave and now you want to apologize on Skype half way across the world 3 days later?'

Geno's shoulders drooped as he kept eye contact no matter how emotional Sid may be. He reached to the bite mark on his neck and covered it fully under his palm.

'Yes. Like, I'm know I worst for this. I'm scare I get everything I'm want and not know what to do. And not like change my flight. I'm leave note in kitchen say sorry to go but call me so we talk about how we work now we wolf marry. You never call. Not answer texts, group chat worry you not say anything. Then Tanger and Flower asking if we know who you mate because they can feel new pack member. Is most scary, Sid, and like, not handle good.' Geno shifts his head down to look up thru his lashes and exhales heavily.

Sid groaned softly as he shook his head. He rolled over in the bed and ignored as his muscles yell in protest. 'Geno, I woke up to a cold and empty bed with no word from you and only the feeling that you were far away. I'm not trying to make you feel bad on top of the separation sickness, but that's just what I went thru. Everything tells me you dont want this with me. Now you say you want me?'

'Yes. I wait so long to like kiss you but so scary, Sid. Not want make friendship or team bad. You most important to me, to team, and to pack. And I'm like most stupid. Understand if you not want most stupid mate.'

'No, I definitely want you if you're serious.' Sid smiles a small private smile as Geno's face floods with relief and joy. He may be a stupid man but he knows he would be more of an idiot to not accept the one he wants when they are asking for him. Calming the feelings of rejection. Protecting his mark with his large hands. 'We need to talk and preferably in person.'

'Yes. Mama want you come here. She not happy we make like wolf marry and not tell her. If you here we go back early see your home and maybe like your mama meet me again. Think I like good mate for Sid.' Sid smiled as Geno blushed at his own words. He leaned forward and started to ask more questions about logistics. He enjoyed watching the tension fade from Geno's face.

They were both idiots.

They could make it work.

***

'Is this her? Your new little pup?' Veronique cooed as she leaned over Catherine to stare at the sleeping baby girl. 'félicitations, ma chère ami. Si belle' Tanger and Flower embraced in welcome as they watched their wives talk about new babies. Veronique was gesturing to her small baby bump as they spoke together. Tanger clapped Flower on the back with a wicked smile. Flower was watching his daughters rough house with Alex as pups. It was nice to be around his chosen pack .

'Oh shit.' Flower and Tanger jerked their attention towards Muzz, Rusty, Dumo and Knuckles. The men were staring at the SUV that had just pulled up. Sid stepped out of the passenger side with a relaxed smile. Flower and Tanger exchanged a look before rushing towards Sid and pulling him into an embrace.

'You smell different.' Flower declared as he scented his friend. He shifted his gaze from Sid to Tanger to the SUV where the driver had yet to exit. The pups had wandered over to explore the SUV and Beckham, Leo, Roo, and Coop had quickly moved to close in on the curious pups from the unknown.

'Like metal and spice?' Tanger suggested before his eyes widened. 'Its about fucking time!'

'Get your stupid Russian ass out here, Malkin. You need to be properly introduced to this pack.' Flower declared.

Sid grinned as Geno slid out of the car with a wicked smile. The pups and dogs yelping in excitement and tumbling over eachother to reach him. He patted Backham's head as he passed. He crossed the distance between him and Sid quickly and brushed a kiss against his forehead.

'Yes, most long time. Most lucky for best mate.' Geno grinned as Sid leaned against him with a smile. His bones didnt ache and Geno's skin didnt try to crawl away anymore. Geno's hand rested over his mark on Sid's hip with a small squeeze as he laughed along with their friends' good natured chirping.

'Flower, he thinks he has the best mate? This pup?' Tanger balks.

'Going to have to agree to disagree.' Sid added as he started to move towards the other pack members to greet them as any good captain and alpha would.

'Welcome to the pack.' Muzz shouted as he chucks an unopened beer towards Geno.

#sidgeno pic fic challenge #sidgeno #sidgeno rpf

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andthenhewentonliving · 5 years

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I was talking to my girlfriend the other day about how good leasing our own house without her dad made me feel and kinda explained what I call my breadwinner complex where I have always had this want/need to be the provider (not necessarily sole provider but like I have always wanted to be able to provide enough that my partner didn’t have to if they didn’t want to work or couldn’t for whatever reason). I always want to be able to take care of my partner and our family. And I am excited that I’m finally getting to that point! I’m looking currently for better paying jobs that will offer more opportunities and pay better and be better for me than my current one. I like my current job, but it doesn’t pay enough and I about kill myself every week working the shift I work with no way to really change that without quitting or getting a different job within the company.

But!! The point of this!!! Was that I tried to call into work today (they wouldn’t let me cause there was “no one to cover my shift” which is not really accurate but I digress) cause I have felt extra extra tired and brain mushy for the past two days for some reason and just wanted another day to get some extra rest before I did my 6 night hell (I offered to take the night after my last usual night to balance out the schedule so I’d still have 6 days) and I am getting to the point where working this shift is just so hard and exhausting mostly cause I work the 6 nights, have a week to recover, and have to put myself through it all over again. I’ve been doing this for 7 months now and I just am getting to my breaking point.

But yeah I was upset about having to work and tired and not feeling great and my girlfriend was really really great and called me “her breadwinner” at some point and it was um

Really fucking validating.

She keeps me going.

#personal #wb #amy bitches about work #yeah i dont usually break down about work so i think she knew that i was really nkt looking forward to it #ive also been trying to do better recently about explaining to her what makes me feel good #and she has been listening #which is um honestly excellent #aksjsjs i love being validated 😭

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missmary1488 · 6 years

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Hurt and alone

By Mary missmary1114 https://archiveofourown.org/works/14800050

( I am not good at these and I am just playing with ideas so I hope you like) this is just my thoughts and hopes at how the scene might play out with Lucy who had a fever. This takes place post Salem #lyatt

5 seconds.... that was all it took to turn his world upside down. 5 seconds from imagining a future with Lucy. 5 seconds imagining the next kiss as he felt the buzz in his pocket and looked at his phone.

"Where are you?"

Jessica came across his phone. It couldnt be he thought. He told Lucy he needed to take care of something. That he would be right back. He needed to see this with his own eyes. As he walked in the bar he searched for her long hair. Further in the bar he stopped cold.

"Jessica?" He asked.

The look on her face was of surprise. They hugged. She was as he remembered her. Hair shorter but it was her. The image of her death came vividly to mind. How can this be. What could have changed to bring her back?

"Can we talk?" He asked. "After my shift", she replied. "Give me your address of where you are staying. I will stop by."

After their meeting he decided to bring her to the bunker. He wouldnt let her out of his sight. Not again. He was surprised to find the team was gone.

"Where are they?" He asked Agent Christopher. "Salem Massachusetts" she replied. "The mothership... it left and the team had to follow after." After he glances around the room he realizes Flynn is no where to be seen. "Where is Flynn? "he asks. "With the team", replies Conner. "Wait so you mean to tell me that the man who has tried to kill our team multiple times is in the 1600s with them and is protecting them?", Wyatt replied agitated. "They needed a soldier Wyatt", replied Agent Christopher.

Wyatt dropped off Jessicas belongings in his room and came back to the main room to wait for the team to get back. He offers Jessica a drink. How could he explain this to her. He sometimes can barely believe it all himself.

When the ship appeared he immediately looked at her to guage her reaction then grabbed the ladder and brought it up to the ship. The doors slowly opened and he saw her. As he walked up the first few steps they kept gazing at each other until he could see she saw movement from the corner of her eye and looked at Jessica. As he glanced back at Jessica he looked at Lucy whose face had gone white. As he started to go up another step Garcia walked up behind her and led her down the stairs. It was when Garcia put his hand on her back he was able to see she was injurred.

It was all his fault. If he had been there she might be okay. What had happened? As they walked away Lucy did not look back but continued to walk forward.

Later that evening Wyatt decided to make something to eat for him and Jessica when he saw Jiya come to the sink to grab a bowl and fill it with water and grab a washcloth.

"Jiya what is wrong", Wyatt asked. "She has a fever ", Jiya replied. "The cut. It became infected. She is burning up. I am trying to cool her down but she is just burning up", Jiya replies rather unsteady. "Here I will help you", Wyatt replies as he follows her back to the room. On the bed lies Lucy covered in blankets moving back and forth. She is talking but he can't understand what she is saying. He catches a few words and stops when he hears her call his name. She isn't coherent but she keeps asking "Why Wyatt Why"... and his heart breaks. Jiya is trying to find a fan to help blow some cold air on her as he uses the wash cloth to try to help cool her down. She is burning up. Why did he have to leave her? Why didn't she tell him the Mothership left? He would have come back for her. Now this was all his fault. He offered to take the first watch while Jiya slept. He watched Lucy eyes flutter in and out of conciousness. He should have been there. He awoke in the chair by Lucys bed still holding her hand. He touched her head. She still had a fever but she seemed to be resting. Jiya was awake and offered to take the next watch. When evening came he would lay next to Jessica until she went to sleep. He would then walk the lonely hall to Lucy's room and take the chair by her bed and offer his hand in comfort. By the next day her fever was finally breaking and Rufus offered to sit with her that night so that Wyatt could finally get a good nights sleep. That night while he lay next to Jessica he couldn't help but feel he had to check on her again. He carefully slipped out of bed and walked to Lucy's room. Rufus was in bed with Jiya and the chair beside Lucys bed was free. He sat there until light started to break through the bunker window watching her sleep. As he started to hear movement in the kitchen he decided to sneak out of the room but not before he pulled the blanket up on Lucy and moved the hair out of her face. He glanced at the other bunk where Rufus and Jiya slept and saw no movement. He looked back at Lucy. He bent down and grabbed her hand and kissed it. A tear formed in his eye and he left the room. As he walked into the common area and kitchen he ran into Flynn and decided he would grab coffee and just walk back to his room. Flynn looked at him realizing the direction to which Wyatt just came and a small smile formed on his face as he turned away to walk toward his room.

The alarms sounded it seemed like only minutes later and Rufus ran out of Jiya's room with Jiya trying to run toward the bay to find out where the ship had landed. CONNECTICUT 1934 appeared on the screen... "what happened there?" Jiya asked. "I'm not sure", replied Flynn. "We need Lucy", Rufus replied. "We will need to make it up as we go I guess" Wyatt replied. Wyatt looked back at Jiya who gave him a comforting smile. She would take care of Lucy while he was gone.

How was he going to do this without his Historian... without Lucy...

#lyatt fic #lyatt fanfic #lyatt #timelessnbc #timeless fic #renew timeless #nbc timeless #timeless #lucy and wyatt #wyatt and lucy #wyattlogan #wyatt logan #lucypreston #lucy #lucy preston

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ramblings-of-a-weary-soul · 3 years

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we were making out I know, but I turned around because i wanted to stop, because I felt weird, I felt confused, i didnt enjoy it anymore. i turned around. you put your hands on my stomach. it was dark. i didnt want your hands there but I didnt care much. i was wearing my pajama pants, the ones that fall down easily bc they are so light. i went to pull them up because they were under my belly and i hate that. i was pulling up my pants. why did you stick your hand inside of them. i turned around, i was pulling my pants up! Pulling them up so they would cover more! So you wouldnt get a "hint" and think that i wanted something!

part of me didnt know what was happening at first. i was too shocked to even do or say anything before your hand was in my underwear. i didnt want it. i thought we were just friends. ive told you countless times how I would hate it if someone touched me like that. YOU KNEW THAT! so why did you think it was okay. you know I dont give signals like that. you didnt even fucking ask. i was too afraid to reject you to even say anything because i knew you would spiral out of control and become a mess if i did. i also was too shocked to get you to stop. i went stiff. i tried shifting my legs to get you to stop but you just took that as me opening up for you.

i told myself to just try and enjoy it. it was going to happen so just try to enjoy it. i couldn't. I couldve just rode it out until you were done but then. why did you stick them in me. it hurt. it fucking hurt. you know especially how much i hate the thought of someone being there. how fucking dare you. i begged and prayed to anyone who would listen that you would stop and go back to what you were doing before. thank god you finally did after your violent motions had left me sore. i remember thinking "why does anyone like this", "how are you so bad at this", "it doesnt feel good at all". i tried to find any pleasure i could in it. to find the bright side. it was horrible. i begged my body to just finish already and get it over with. you tried to stick them inside of me again. i grabbed you hand before you could even get there. you would think that you wouldve stopped. but no. you just continued what you were doing before. I was finally able to finish after what felt like 15 minutes. I layed there as you spooned me after. proud of yourself. I wordlessly got up and got clothes and my phone and i went to the bathroom. i looked in the mirror and got nauseasous. i remember sitting in the bath tub thinking that i should text our friend. I was so close to doing it that i ached. i should've texted her. god i shouldve. instead i listened to "class of 2013" by mitski for 20 minutes and shook and held myself. i couldnt fucking believe what happened. I finally decided that I would pretend it didnt happen for the sake of our friendship. i was good at ignoring things.

the next day, when we got in the car. our friend said something about it, in a hidden way. you laughed. you fucking told her. how dare you. how dare you tell her what you did to me like i wanted it. you disgust me.

i havent talked to you much in weeks not only because im depressed, but because of this. I remember hinting to you on call that i didnt like it. of course you didnt get the hint. nothing will ever be the same now.

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lizzyfish225 · 6 years

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Transformers tickle fic.

This is the first tickle fic i have written in a long time, but this has been floating around in y head for a while and i had to wright it down. i know i have one friend who is on tumblr that i know. so if she sees this and puts two and two together that i like tickling. REALY like it. then so be it, i wouldnt need to tell you in person. if you read this, you know who you are, please dont spread this around. there iis a bit of a lead up until the actual tickiling part, so bear with me.

right into it.

Optimus Prime and Megatron had just gotten out of a hostage situation along with their higher ups (TFP season one team prime, soundwave, starscream, and knockout.) the two of them had been foeced to fight together to escape from their past as it was told to everyone bearing wittness. the rivals had been brothers since they were younglings, megatron being ten and optimus being nine. they grew up in orphanages on cybertron. it wasnt until they reached headmisstress Dockra`s home that they stopped moving around. this is the place they met. this woman would beat, rape, and scream at all of the younglings under her care. it wasnt until megatron was able to convince the athoraties of what happened when he turned 18 that they were freed and their headmisstress locked away. they had a big brother-little brother relationship from then on unti the war. and while in captivity, being forced to go through their past, they became brothers once again. they eventualy escaped with everyonr and the autobots were staying on the nemisi to recover. the humans had been informed. the war was still tecnicaly happening, but it was in a sort of dip. megatron as -however- heavily concidering ending it. he had only just gotten his little brother back, and he did not intend to loose him again. but should he realy END the war?

Megatron considered this as he uncontiously walked through the corridor where the autobots resided temporarily. there were ligts above each door to indicate if the lights were still on in each soundproofed room. the one above optimus` door was green. he was still awake. curious, megatron pressed the button for the intercom on the prime`s door.

`Optimus? are you still awake?` megatron asked curiously through theintercom.

`Yes. what do you need?` optimus replied through the com after a moment.

`Nothing, just checking. the light above your door was green. may i come in, Brother?` megatron asked, not catching himself useing the term they had accidentily readopted for eachother. the door slid open after a moment before optimus spoke

`Ofcorce, Brother.` he didnt catch it either. The prime stepped aside to alow the jus slightly taller mech to step inside before closing the door to the private quarters.

`Why are you still up?` megatron asked in his usesual tone. though it lacked the normal malace it useualy held.

`i could ask you the same thing, megatron.` optimus replied. he had avoided that one.

`it`s my ship. im simply out to think. but you never answered my question.` megatron smirked. he still knew all of his tricks from when optimus was orion.

`couldnt sleep. not sure why. no issue though. i was just about to do some reading before you stoped by.` optimus replied before he spun around to face the bookshelf filled withdatapads. egatron snorted.`oh please, you know exactlywhy you cant sleep. dont lie to me Pri-` megatron pushed, reaching to poke optimus in the sholder, only to hit the back of his side istead as he moved forward. megatron was cut off by a short and uncharictaristic squeak from the prime as he spun around holing his side. his optics were wide as he looked at megatron, but they fell to a look of confusion as he realized what he just did. he furrowed his eyebrows together and looked at his siide. juring this, megatron stared with a look of suprize and confusion. in his curiosity, megatron reached forward and poked the prime in the abdomen again, earning a similar noise as before, and the same instand reaction to pull away. it took a moment for it to click, but it did. the both of them assumed this s something that would have been lost when orion because optimus. they were wrong. megatron couldnt helpit and grinned teasingly at the prime for the first time since before the war.

`oh optimus~ dont tell me you never out grew little orion`s weakness...` megatron smirked. the look in his optics was predatory. but not as you would expect from the warlord. it was brotherly. optimus hadnt seen that look in milenia, so he assumed he imagined it and tried to cover up what they both knew.

`i-i have know idea what you mean...` optimus STUTTERED. that was quite amusing for megatron.

`mmhmm... so you dont know what THIS is?` megatron smirked, jabbing the prime in the side to tease him.

`hey!` optimus yelped, turning away to avoid the contact. megatron let out a short laugh and the reaction.`huh. i wonder what that could have been.` megatron gave a few more jabbs with similar reactions. `hold still, prime. i need to make sure you arent hurt or something!` megatron stated as though he was oblivious as to what he was doing. he didnt know why he was doing this, but he was enjoying teasing his long time enemy like his little brother again.

`Megatron! Stop! i am just fine!` the prime spoke quickly between two jabs.

`then why do you keep moving?` megatro teased, speeding up his one finger pokes. this got a couple unavoidable chuckles out of the prime.

`Enohough! Stop pokeing mehe!` the younger chuckled, trying to doge the others fingers and ended up gettng backed into a wall. welp. he was screwed.

`was that a laugh?` megatron smirked.

`noho!`

`oh isee~ i know whats happening. youre still ticklish, arent you prime?` megatron teased, enjoying how the prime`s face heated up.

`I am nohot!`

`nono. the laughing, the squirming, the twitching... defineately ticklish.` megatron stated matter fo factly as he continued poking the prime until he saw the prime flinch particularly hard as he poked one place in particular -right under where the prime`s ribs would be if he were human. megatron desided to linger there. sudden, qick pokes brought a yelp and a short barck of laughter from the prime before he was finaly able to grab megatron`s wrist and push his servo away to arms length with one hand. this would have ended right then had megatron not decided to throw all dignnity out the window and act like a sparkling one more time, diving for prime`s exposed ribs and attacking. tis caused the prime to dyep and shoot his arm down, releaseing megatron`s wrist and attempting to wswatt away the offending appendage. optimus mannaged to get past megatron, only to be pulled to the warmonger`s laughing chest and tickled on his sides with megatron wrapping his arms around the prime. optimus SQUEALED.

`NO! hey! what are you doiIIING! MEGATRON! NOHOHOHO! Stohohop thahahat!` optimus laughed as he gave in, no longer able to hold back his laughter as he tried to get away in his laughter weakened state.

`There we go! what did i tell you, prime? ticklish. now, what was it that always had you on the groud again?` megatron laughed. his smile was wide and genuine. though optimus was smiling wider.

`Megatrohohon! stohohohop! ihi am nohohot a younglihihing anymohohohohohore! gehehehehet ohohohoff!` optimus laughed, trying to swat and push away the elder`s hands.

`right. it was your hips!` megatron smirked egnoreigng the other`s words.

`wait no! megatron doNT! NO! GAHAHAHAHAHAHA! DAHAHAHANMIHIHIHIHIT! STOHOHOHOHOHOP!` Optmus cackled as megatron shifted and started squeazeing the prime`s hips quicky. the prime`s knees grew week and he started sinking down th the floor until he was leaning up againsed his brother`s chest nd trying to squirm away. megatron began to laugh along with optimus. he was so glad these rooms were sound proof.

optimus eventualy managed to roll away, only to get a few short breaths before megatron was leaning over him with his servoes under his arm joints. optimus` shriek was absolutely worth it.

`NO! GAHAHAHAHA! NOHOHOHOHOHOHO! MEGATROHOHON! GEHEHEHEHET OHOHOHOFF!! STAHAHAHAHAHAP!` optimus screached as he tried desperately to escape megatrons scrating andscribbleing fingers. he was layng on his back withhis legs kicking, his arms pined to his sides, and his head thrown back as he laughed and tried to squirm away from the hands that had started digging. the laughing and squirming earned him ashort escpe oonce again, rolling over and scrabbleing away, only to be dragged back and to have hands start scrableing allover his ribs, sides, and back from behind. this turned him into a squealing, shreaking and squirming mess on the floor of his temporary chambers abord the nemisis. megatron eventualy mannaged to pull a cackleingprime into his lap with his back to his chest, attacking his sides and abackwardsone wy evil hug to restrain him. once again laughing histaricaly, optimus fought the hands with all his shakeing hands could give. when he saw an opening, megatron went in for the kill. one hand digging in the pries underarm, and the other squeasing his hip, megatron made the prrime squeal, shriek, and squeak all at the same time. the prime was squirming and clawing away with increased vigor. when they were children, megatron would oftin do this to little orion, alway manageing to have him on the floor for the next half of an earth hour. this combination proved to be just as effective now, as optimus stoped paying much atttention to what he was saying. `MEGSY NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO! COHOHOHOHOME OHOHOHON! CHEHEHEHEATEHEHEHER! STAHAHAHAHAHAP! PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE!` that made megatron pause. MEGSY?

`did... did you just...` megatron whispered. optimus was confused.

`w-what?` he panted.

`did you just call me `Megsy`?` megatron asked with a soft smile the prime couldnt see.

`i... uh... think i did... oops...` optimus admitted sheepishly. megatron froze still for a moment, deciding what to do. optimus hadnt called him that sincethey were children. and megatron had forbidden him from calling him that infront of anyone once he was a gladiator. the waronger couldnt help the soft smile that spread on his face. he realy did have his brother back.

`n-now now. dont be sheepish about it!` megatron teased, stuttering as he got over the shock.

`ahem. can get up now...` optimus asked, shifting uncomfortably. megatron smirked.

`not until you whipe that sheepish look off your fce andtell e why you couldnt sleep.` megatron chuckled, pokeing the prime in the sides a few more times. already sensitive from the privious time, otimus jumped and started emitting deep giggles instantly, squirming away as best he could while trapped in the older`s grasp.

`NO! megatron! come ohon! let gohoho!` optimus grinned. megatron smiled at that. he was in bg brother mode again after so llong. it felt good, and melted away some of that ice in his spark. megatron went at it again, bringing the prime totears with another laughing fit before releaseing him and alowing him to roll away and cover his abdomen. megatron shifter on the floor to lean againsed the wall as he atched the prime calm down.

`now, are you going to tell me why you couldnt sleepor m i going to have to keep going?` megatron asked with a kind smile. a smile that hadnt adorned his face since before the war. optimus gulped and shifted to sit on he oposite wall to megatron to face himwith tired eyes. optimus looked at megatron for a moment, taking in that brtherly smile before gathering his thoughts.

`i was onlythinking about how difficult it is going to be to go backto fighting again. esspetialy ater tonight... but that shouldnt matter much to you. i will take my autobots off the ship as soon as they are healed enough to recover back at base and -as humans say- get outof your hair.` optimus stated, looking down and speaking with his useua shieding and leadership tone adorning his face,as though what had just happened never occered. megatron stared at hi enemy. his... brother... for a few moments beforemaking his decision.

`Prime. i will not loose my little brother again.`

`what?`

`after so long of war, and seeing you without those guards. acting like yourself again... i lack the streangth to return to battle. againsed you at least.`

`are you saying what i think youre saying...?`

`lets end this, prime. what do you say, fix things and berothers again?` megatron gulped, standing and holding a hand out to hs little brother. prime looked at him, before his optics lit up. taking the hand with asmile, he allowedhimself to be liftedup to hs feet again.

`nagotiations start assoon as everyone is healed up, brother.` optimus smiled. they were both beaming as megatron left the room a fewmuinets later. they both called after eachother to rest least the other would either have revenge or add more to the tickley pile.

both brothers lept like sparkings that night with a sile on their face.

#tickle #tfp #optimus prime #megatron #brothers #peace

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bakubitch · 7 years

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YO. IM EMBARRASSED I KNOW REQUEST ARE CLOSED BUT HEAR ME OUT. Pffffft I'm laughing real hard I had no service at the time (I sent the ask) sooo wasn't on Tumblr lately and typed at sonic speed and I guess autocorrect thought rioki/friend was more fitting for my sentence! I'm sorry for the confusion I fixed it!!! Can I have a scenario where todoroki spots his s/o or friend playing the piano and singing? He thinks it's amazing but realizes they're crying . Gimme the fluff*****

Fun fact: Requests opened shortly before you resent it with a clarification.

Warning: Spoiler for Provisional License Arc

Itwas in the late afternoon when the sun was already starting to slowlyset, turning the sky into a mix of burning, vibrant, warm colors. Theonly sound that echoed through the halls were his own footsteps andthe reason behind the fact that he was still wandering around theschool was catching up, as he did not pass the provisional licenseexam including Bakugou. Several injuries of today’s training werecovered up with bandages and all kinds of different sized patches allover his face to his arms, upper body leading to further – itdefinitely was not pretty but Todoroki did everything in hiscapabilities to finish successfully.

Thebuilding seemed so different when it was void of teachers andstudents walking through it ever so loudly yet by no means lifelessand cold. The remaining sunrays that were shining upon it gave off awarming and welcoming atmosphere that he was unable to put intoactual words.

Peace that he found in the current state of environment wasinterrupted by the sound of a melody that was playing a tad furtheraway from his standing point, his feet slowly stopping theirmovements because as he was continuing his path, it became louder andclearer. „Someone is still here?“, the bicolorhaired male mumbledsoftly to himself. Not sure why but perhaps out of curiousity theywere leading him towards the source in a pace that matched with theaudio with his figure ending up in front of a certain and so normal school room. The small signread: „Music room“. The closer he got, the more aware did hebecome of a familiar voice that mingled shyly into the sounds ofgentle notes leaving the instrument, his ears were catching foreignphrases that his english abilities could not precisely catch up with. Involuntarily his handslipped carefully to the handle before sliding it slowly to the side and assoundless as possible open, questioning himself if that was reallynecessary and if he should better not interrupt them - to leave instead.

„Inthe moment I was born, I wouldnt stop screaming. Saying that I wantedto fade away and disappear.“

Yet there he stood,surprise taking him lightly back from the person that was currentlyrevealing themself as an utterly amazing vocalist and pianist.Todoroki’s features softened a little bit at the sight, relieved thatit was them and not some stranger sitting there with their fingersgracefully moving over the keys. Sometimes music reveals more thanany words could ever do – so far the male has heard and now was thetime to acknowledge that statement as he watched, heterochromaticeyes being locked by their sole presence.

Hewas able to catch several of those… Sadness. Frustration. Grief.Anxiety and a few more – things, that his friend would never show ontheir face in front of others. It struck him in odd places. And evenif his English was not what you may call perfect in the least, heunderstood. Todoroki Shouto understood.

„Eversince the day has stopped, I had always been searching. For the oneI’d someday meet. For the you that has to leave.“

Insome way he found it beautiful. Just this whole image that took placein front of him was astonishing yet why did he feel so awful at thesame time? Was he currently invading their personal space by standingthere without their knowledge? They didnt seem to have noticed him.And somehow he could sense that it would come to an end soon, therefore hedecided to let them finish, remaining in silence - what should he do after that?

„With this endlesspain in my heart tearing me apart but also you beside me. Cantyou see how happy Id be, Id smile and Id say -It was all for thebest you see-“

Therewas barely an accent audible in the way they sang the words, theinstrumental becoming more present as their fingers pressed harder.Their voice started to tremble, to waver, he realized as his handshad formed into clenching fists from the wave of emotions washingover his being.

„As the world infront of me melts and fades away, I only have one thing to say.These miracles flooding me wont make it go away. Because I canstill hear your voice calling out my name.“

Andwith the final verse a few more notes followed and finally, as ifthey held it all back for who knows how long, they cracked, breakingthe flow.

„Hey, is italright if I keep calling out your name.“

A small pause before inhaling shakily, they slowly removed themself from the piano, putting their hands into their lap before leaving a heavy sigh.„(Name)“,he called out, watching adoringly how their body flinched at hissudden barge-in but he didnt care… He couldnt care any less. Theirbody shifted on the stool to turn towards his direction – yes, right now they definitely needed someone beside them. There were indeed tears running down their cheeks, streaming downtheir chin to finally fall off into their lap – surprise writtenall over their face at his appearance. And it was still nonethelessjust… So beautiful.

„Youwere amazing.“

Eyeswidened at Todoroki’s statement as their lips started to tremor evenmore than before. The male let out an uncharacteristic huff – a reallysmall smile gracing his features. „Shouto… Thank you..“, theysobbed as he steadily walked up to them.

Admin Shiro

#todoroki shouto #bnha imagines #mha imagines #boku no hero #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bnha scenarios #mha scenarios #scenarios #僕のヒーローアカデミア #僕のヒーロー

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notmynostalgia · 4 years

Text

lets get personal

i got my period in 5th or 6th grade, when i was 11-12 years old. previously, my only worries had been homework and a boy i liked, but not anymore. from that time until i was 20, it lasted 10 days. a third of every month for ten years i spent bleeding (now its 7 days, so a fourth of every month, as it probably will be for another forty years). the few days leading up to it i had bloating and pms acne, sending my self esteem plummeting, and the days of i had terrible cramps and lower back pain that took my breath away and left me so nauseous and exhausted that if the first day came while i was at school or volleyball practice, i had to leave so i could go home and curl up on my bed with hot packs on my stomach and back and a bucket nearby in case i did actually puke. my chest was so sore i couldnt sleep on my stomach. sometimes just talking felt impossible.

i wore pads, not tampons, because i didnt like the way tampons felt. they hurt going in and coming out. once on vacation when i was 13 or 14 we were going to the beach but id started my period on only the second day we’d been there, so my mom gave me one of her super-jumbo tampons, because apparently hers was really heavy too. sitting on the toilet taking it out was one of the most painful experiences i had ever had. i grit my teeth and held my breath until i couldnt anymore and then i was sweating all over and so fucking scared i wouldnt be able to do it. but i did, because i had too.

i was also terrified of toxic shock syndrome, which happens when you leave a tampon in for too long, and it can kill you.

those kinds of things dont happen with pads, but they’re really not good for a lot of other things. when you get up from bed in the morning, the first thing you do is go to the bathroom because theres a chance you bleed through or around your pad, even though you slept the whole night on one side with your legs clamped together. moving around when you sleep can shift how the pad fits and if it isnt positioned just right, you can bleed through your underwear, pajamas, and onto your sheet. if you were shorts to bed, you may wake up with bloody fingers from itching down there while still half asleep. that happened to me about three times before i realized what was happening. i had to use q-tips to get the dried, caked blood from under my finger nails, and now i wear pants to sleep in. in the morning, as you stand, gravity pulls the blood that was pooling somewhere still inside you since you were lying horizontally, and you feel acutely clumps of blood somewhat solidified like gel, pass through you. and there is nothing you can do about it. you cant hold it in. you just have to feel it and accept it like everything else that comes with having a period. sometimes, this is still happening when you go sit down on the toilet and blood gets on the waistband on your shorts or pants and the toilet seat and maybe the bathroom floor. you have to try and gauge when there is a pause in the blood flow, and youre never always right. so now you have to get a clean change of underwear and pants, but you cant put the ones around your ankles back on because youd get blood on you in other places. so you take them off and hobble back to your bedroom with your legs close together so you dont bleed on the floor and hope that none of your family happens to come around the corner and see you. you get back to the bathroom and lock the door. you put a fresh pad - which will only last about 4 hours (so 5-6 pads a day for the first 2-3 days, then 3-4 for the next two, then 2-3 for the next two, and 1 for the last day), if you sit still and do nothing - on your fresh underwear. also, and i dont know why, but youll probably have diarrhea for the first few days of your period too.

playing sports with pads isnt fun. in high school for volleyball games, i had to wear actual underwear, because pads literally, physically cant work with thongs, and then spandex shorts over the underwear because i didnt want to have underwear lines and also for another layer of protection in case of leaks, and then our uniform shorts. nothing about it was comfortable. and obviously, you cant swim while wearing a pad, so youd better be sure to plan beach/swimming trips so they dont fall anywhere near your period, if you can. but they will anyway, because until youre in your twenties, your period will be irregular. mine changed every month by a few days, sooner or later. and sometimes, you think its over, youll go a couple hours with nothing, a clean pad, but then theres more. another day or two. so you were supposed to go hiking today but your period came early or started late and its just so much physical and emotional labor to try and deal with being a person while bleeding from your vagina and every complication that comes with it (like the pressure from a car seatbelt digging into your stomach even though its hardly touching you, like estimating how many pads youll need for the day and remembering to pack them, like having to change what you were going to wear to something loose-fitting like sweatpants and dark to conceal potential leaks) that you cancel.

in college, i played volleyball, and we had a strength and conditioning trainer we saw twice a week, but i continued to train with him for another year after volleyball ended. when i would start my period or be on the first, second, or third day, i would text him and say i wasnt feeling well or had the flu, because i wasnt sure how he’d react to me not coming in because i was on my period. for some reason, its embarrassing to have a period. we have to lie, we have to have good names like “aunt flo” “ketchup” ”monthly visitor”, even among fellow women. in high school and even college, i would have to wait until the bathroom was empty to open my pad because the packaging was so loud and i didnt want anyone to know, and sometimes that made me late for class or practice. we make sure no one’s looking when we pull “sanitary items” from our backpacks or bags; i would wear a sweatshirt and stick the pad up my sleeve so no one would notice. i would be in so much pain during class that i’d taken six midol over the course of the school day but still have to hold my stomach and try to think of anything else that if, if a teacher asked what was wrong or why i wasnt paying attention i would just say i didnt feel good. and your entire life if you show any emotion that a man deems part of an inappropriate reaction, youll have to deal with him thinking or asking if you’re on your period.

in the shower, you bend over and watch the blood run into the drain. youll have to wait for a pause in the flow to get out, dry off and hobble quickly to the toilet. sometimes youll sit down and see pink water droplets on the inside of your thighs where blood mixed with the shower water. you wipe them off before putting underwear on a new pad for the night.

the day before you start your period you might have just done laundry, but it came unexpectedly and theres blood all over you underwear and maybe your shorts or pants. do you waste the water and wash those two garments now in hope that they dont stain, or do you throw them in the laundry basket to be washed in a couple days with a full load?

when it comes to work, if im on my period for my fast food job, i cant call off, and we’re so short staffed that ill never find someone to cover me, so i work. at my desk job, im lucky enough to be able to sit with a hot pack and a cup of red raspberry leaf tea so i can make it through.

men will never know what its like to have a period and pretend that you dont.

#and thats why women are inherently superior #also i have endometriosis and 1 in 10 women do.#some womens' periods arent this bad but some womens' periods are worse #periods #women #woman #menstruation #menstrual health #menstrual cycle #also ladies if you havent tried red raspberry leaf tea DO IT its literally game changing. everything still sucks but a little bit less #womens health

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effervescentmind · 4 years

Text

Entry 18: 07/10/19 @ 3:42 p.m.

I’m at work on the patio.

So I have a lot of crappy news to talk about. These last few days havent been very great. Last Tuesday I woke up with some strange sharp pain on my right collarbone but the pain would only come if I inhaled. I dismissed it, thinking maybe that I had slept weird and it would pass. Wednesday, it moved to my left collarbone and I knew it was too much of a coincendence to be a strain but I still ignored it. Thursday I felt no pain until the evening when my waist started feeling a bit sore. It wasnt a sharp pain but more like the soreness you get from working out. I’m a server and work at least 40 hours a week so I figured my body just felt tired like usual. Friday I woke up around 3 a.m. in sooo much pain. It felt like someone stabbed my ribs, I could barely move without screaming. I eventually fell back asleep and then called out of work when I got up. When I explained to the manager that I was going to the hospital for unexplainable pain, he told me he had my morning covered but he fully expected me to be there that night for dinner shift. I hung up and was very upset at the lack of concern he had for my well-being. I didn’t have any money to get a lyft to the hospital and texted my mom and best friends’ mom for ten bucks. My best friends mom didnt get back to me that day but my mom was able to cash app me. I called my job and spoke with another manager, updating him on my situation and that I would keep him posted. When I got there, I was seen right away because there was no line. The doctor immediately knew I had Pleurisy.

From what I understand its a viral infection that inflames the protective lining of your lungs. The lining is suposed to protect your lungs and make sure they expand smoothly against your ribcage. When the lung gets inflammed, it creates friction. That friction was what I was feeling everytime I inhaled. The doctor gave me a 800mg ibeprofen and kept me there for an hour to see if it helped. It worked very slightly but I was still in pain and breathing shallow. He perscribed me the ibeprofen and instructed me to stay home that night and the next day. I called my job and a third manager picked up. I updated him and let him know that I had to stay home. He was very upset about it and then we hung up.

Saturday morning, I get a text from my bestfriends’ mom. It was her husband telling me that she was in the hospital and thats why I didnt get a call back but that he would still send me the money if I needed it. He was concerned about me as well. I told him what happened and that I was ok and didnt need the money. Then I asked him if mom (I call her mom because she took me in and is eveything to me) was ok and he said he didnt know. That she had tried to overdose on Xanax. I was in shock and told him I was so sorry and that I wanted to come see her. I asked for her number and expressed my convern for him and my little sister. He said she was fine and that they told her that mom just needed help feeling happy and that she would be home soon. My heart was heavy and I cried for hours. I ended up talking to my best friend and we got high on the phone and cried together. Neither of us had talked to mom because we didnt want to upset her with our emotions.

Sunday morning, I was still in pain but not as much as the day before. When I got to work, I realized that I wasnt ready for it. I couldnt walk very fast or I would get winded because of all my shallow breathing. Talking was very short and limited or very strained and exhausting. My coworkers kept asking me if I was ok and wondering why I was so quiet. I felt like shit and the more I worked the worse the pain would get until I had to stop every two minutes to catch my breath. I started talking to coworkers and asking if anyone wanted to pick up my shift. No one could because they were all doubles so I went to my boss and told her I couldnt breath. She immediately told me that I had to go home and stopped me from trying to find people to cover my shift. She told me I was fine.

The guy that picked me up drove like a fucking maniac and added to the horrish pain I would eventually feel when I got home. It felt like he was tossing me around in the back seat with a thousand knives around me and I was too winded to speak up. Then when I got home, I dropped everything on the floor and tried to sit on the couch but couldnt even sit. It was too painful to move. I literally had to keep my torso perfectly straight and spread my legs to lower myself onto the couch. I could not use my abs AT ALL or I would trigger a sharp pain and scream. I eventually took a shower and stayed on the couch for the remainder of the evening. Going to bed was a thirty minute process. Just finding the right angle to lower myself and figuring out what movements I had to make for the least painful experience was exhausting. My sleep was rough and uncomfortable.

I had monday off (thankfully) and still had a considerable amount of pain but felt much better. Spent the day relaxing and catering to myself and body.

Tuesday (yesterday) I felt GREAT. Hardly any pain and no laborous talking. I went in to work and people were happy to see me and happy that I was back…I realized that I was happy too. Not because of my job but because holy shit I finally felt close to normal again. Everything was going great, we had a slight pop and I was in my groove. Then the mid-manager comes in (the one that was upset about me not coming in over the weekend) and askes me how I was feeling and without letting me answer comments, disappointedly, on how I called out again on Sunday. I looked at him and said that I had to, I couldnt breathe and he scoffed at me. I then told him that I did come Sunday and tried but left early and he just walked away and didnt say anything. I continued to take care of my tables but his comments were in the front of my mind, They were really bothering me! So as soon as I found a monet to talk, I pulled him aside to speak in private. I told him that I didnt appreciate his comment earlier, that it was insensitive. I tried my best and still came in despite my condition. I missed out on at least 300 dollars over the weekend and noe had a 200 dollar hospital bill to pay without insurance. He somewhat sympathized and agreed that he was maybe a little insensitive. I said it was alright and he proceeded to tell me about one of my coworkers and how they have been working for two weeks with rib pain. Then I told him that he had nothing to do withme and that it my pain was different. It was my lung and I explained what the doctor told me about Pleurisy. He listened and acknowleged that he might have been insensitive but then told me about how he was at work for a whole week once with kidney stones. Again, I told him that his stones have nothing to do with my long and that he was downplaying my situation. He then someowhat agreed with me and we ened the conversation. i thought we were good and it was over but he follwed me to the bar and told me that earlier he was just asking me a question and he wasnt being rude. I reiterated what he said and how and told him that he was expressing disappointment. He then denied it and reitarated a version of his “question” with the same words and nicer tone. I told him that yes he did say that but not in the form of a question and not nicely. He continued to go back and forth with me and I stopped him saying that I wasnt trying to argue with him. He wouldnt let it go so I told him he was being defensive and he told me he wasnt and started trying to fight with me about being defensive. I told him that this was dumb and that I wasnt going to argue. He cut me off and said it was dumb and it was dumb for me to bring it up in the first place. Then (yelling) told me that I had the resturant in a disarray for no reason. He said this while walking away from me and by guests, making sure he was heard. I yelled back “I’m so sorry Jason that you had a hole in your floor for three days because I was in the hospital, you asshole!”. He then went to our boss and started talking shit and then immediately after went up to the hostesses telling them that he didnt care that I felt like he was being insensitive. I couldnt believe that this MANAGER was acting like a stupid like fucking child and causing a scene.

The worst part of this all is that my boss was on his side and basically told me that I was being emotional and that Jason didnt mean anything by it. Hes just a very black and white person and thats what got him the job in the first place. UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!!!!!! I didnt even argue back because I’m so done witht his place. I’m offically fucking numb. I’m just going to work on getting my car and then line up a better job so that I cant quit. I’m not even going to tell them, I’ll just not call and block them. Fuck these bitches.

#oldiary

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