#but only if you've seen the whole thing!

[jokramer]

Please read the fanfiction The Eightfold Fence by The Android.

#fx shogun #shogun 2024 #shōgun #shogun 1980 #1980 Shogun #fanfic #fanfic recommendation #a strong recommendation #prepare for angst #and fluff #pls help #haven't been the same since I read it #pls read it #but only if you've seen the whole thing! #and are familiar with the 1980 one

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[deconstructthesoup]

On a scale of the Magnus Archives fandom to the Hazbin Hotel fandom how good are you at acknowledging and respecting a character's asexual identity

#posting this before i chicken out #i've been watching a lot of video essays on ace rep in media and i realized that there's a reason why i'm only a casual hazbin fan #and on the other side of things there's a whole fandom out there full of aces #and they'll write some of the most thought-provoking pieces on sexuality and humanity that you've ever seen #hazbin hotel #alastor the radio demon #the magnus archives #jon sims #asexuality #asexual

[mokutone]

late entry for day 6 of @tendaysoftenzo ! the prompt was:

Day 6, November 6th: Global Arts and Culture | What If 

i've been on something of a mild horror/angst kick lately! a "What If" that always plagues me has always been "What if Tenzō didn't make it out of Root before he entered the narrative?"

it's not an AU i ever seriously plan to play with because it warps and breaks the canon narrative so bad, and it's just straight up unfun, but. every once and a while I get curious who "Captain Yamato" would have been, in that case, especially working alongside Sai still!

#tendaysoftenzo #naruto #my art #yamato #tenzō #yamato tenzo #kakashi #tsunade senju #jiraiya #for such a small and short comic. hoo. this was tricky #the whole thing is that for it to hit at all it relies entirely on two load-bearing expressions. one is kakashi's look #the other is tenzō's close up #kakashis was the least important of the two because he doesn't need to convey a specific feeling he just needs to look wigged out #ambiguously completely unnerved—not scared. not mad. but Upset. like hes seen a ghost #yamato on the other hand needs to have a very specific expression and that expression is ''the hollowest man you've ever seen'' #a man you could expectantly crack over a frying pan only to have a single mote of dust drift down from the split shell #a man you could slap on the shoulder and he'd ring like a gong #a man who could be used as a life preserver in case of a man-overboard drill #and getting the balance of ''he's trying to be friendly'' and #''anything he had inside of him has been hidden like his personality was subject to a suburban mother cleaning for thanksgiving company'' #was a little tricky #also i think...this was my first time drawing jiraiya? i have to say...he's really fun to draw. #hes also so fucking huge he makes tsunade look tiny #even from across kakashi's hospital bed gkjsdhgksdhgksdghksdghsdgh

[kenzan-kiwami]

to be completely frank i think most of the people i've seen with major complaints regarding RGG 8's story are forgetting that 99% of what they're saying can be applied across the whole series

#this is not aimed at anyone in particular i've seen these sentiments all over #but things like 'well the story was mid' ok well come back to me after you've replayed yakuza kiwami. no optional majima everywhere allowed #and things like the ending falling flat - sure. but so did 7's #the pacing in the end chapter + chekhov's failboy were like. huh??? #i'm never gonna call RGGS perfect but they're NOT regressing at all. #if anything gaiden and 8 have got me extremely hopeful for whatever comes next #like it's their 20th anniversary this year they've left so many loose ends in 8 they can carry on from they've got forever to keep going #MY only complaint is that they couldn't have retrofitted more of gaiden into IW but i can't exactly fault them for that #idk for all of the dooming i'm seeing i want to say something more positive about the game as a whole #even if this post is still pretty doom & gloom #people just let their expectations get way too high for this one game and i'm not even sure how that happened in most cases #it met all of mine - hell it EXCEEDED them. but i recognise i may be privileged on that front lol <- kashiwagi likers are eating so well rn #text #8 #again i don't mean to attack anyone in particular it's just a general frustration i've been having #and i only hope that if there comes a time when people play over again that they're able to dig further into the meat of the story #and recognise that this game isn't uniquely 'shit' or 'mid'

[radioactivepeasant]

Fic Prompts: Snippet Wednesday

This is technically part of the overarching Sons of Spargus universe, set between Jak 3 and Jak X. It's just an outline right now of a short horror fic with the working title Lightless Deep, featuring Jak being placed in command of a fairly doomed expedition into a sunken Precursor city similar to the one in TPL.

The inscription on the wall was deep, but crude. Not engraved, like most Precursor artifacts, but scratched or hammered into the metal of the torn bulkhead. Done quickly, and by the look of it, desperately. One of the monks traced his fingers over it and nodded solemnly.

"It is a warning against those who dwell in darkness," he said.

Jak curled his lip. "It's grafitti," he scoffed, "And that's not what it says."

The monk started to retort before remembering who he was speaking to. "With...respect, young prince," Resh said through gritted teeth, with anything but respect, "The Precursor language has been my area of expertise for decades."

Jak was nonplussed. "Yeah, and you people write your subjects before your predicates." He shrugged. "Old school Precurian text is the other way around."

He decided not to mention that this was why he could barely do more than write his name in the modern parlance. Instead he lifted his light a little higher and decided to show off. Just a little.

"It says "Come not near me, o you Pale One, from your depths where you lie dreaming."

Something nudged at the back of his mind like a half forgotten warning. Jak shook the creeping sensation off.

"Go down and be buried in the lightless deep, and be confounded by shadows for eternity.""

Daxter shuddered and drew his vest a little closer around him. "You know you two probably activated some ancient curse, right?"

#fic prompts #writing prompts #jak and daxter #sons of Spargus #snippet Wednesday #eventually I'll write the whole thing #but basically if you've ever seen or played Amnesia The Bunker then you've got an idea of how their trip will go #jak spends the first half questioning if he's blacking out and doing this as dark jak #he's not. there is no safety in the light down in the sunken city. only darkness will save them.

[domsaysstuff]

(ronance, robin(/a lil bit stobin too)-centric, side steddie fic idea)

So I'll probably at this point will never write this idea but I still wanted to share it with the fandom so I'll just dump my ramblings abt it here

I've been toying with the idea of actually nancy falling for Robin first and also Robin's queer adolescence and how Robin's trauma goes into her relationships

Specifically her relationship with Vicky

I just want her to care? To feel like the world is breaking because it's her first relationship??? like i want her to try and try to make this relationship work and still it doesn't because vicky wanted a clumsy cute normal girl and robin is all of that but also, also she wakes up in the middle of the night screaming, there are days where she needs to keep holding steve's hand to be okay, to remind themselves that they are real and here and alive and she has a group of people that she's very codependent with, a group of people that vicky will never fully be absorbed with and like all of this is fine if it's something vicky could take but she doesn't want and she doesn't have to!! but like it still hurts robin deeply because vicky is kind and she likes her back and she's her first love and to lose that slowly, to see vicky get overwhelmed with all of this is killing robin, it's making her feel even more broken and it hurts but also, it's just how things go

sometimes you fall in love and you get loved back and it still doesn't work out

it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt tho

so i just want her to care i want her to be hurt deeply in a way only first relationships hurt

Like I want Vicky and Robin to be cute and together and I want Robin to like her so fucking much and I want it to fail anyway because that's how it sometimes is no matter how smitten Robin is, how much they want it to work and it hurts, it hurts because it's unfair and it hurts because it's just how it goes and there is also just nothing special about it

And like Robin understands, but it hurts and it feels like there is just one more wrong thing with her, before she couldn't connect with people because of her being a lesbian and now when she found a girl that likes her she can't connect with her because of her trauma and it feels unfair, so fucking unfair

And at the beginning from Robin's side Ronance is platonic because she's preoccupied with Vicky and also because Nancy is Robin's first female friend

The thing is that Robin has grown up weird, it's like everybody could smell the queer on her before she could even understand it herself and so at first ronance from robin's pov is just a lot of being grateful for having a girl friend, for experiencing girl nights and sleepovers and Nancy doesn't make her feel like a freak and it feels safe and girly in a way Robin has never allowed herself to feel, always just too uncomfortable around girls even before she knew why, so she's kind of reliving her girlhood and honestly i think she deserves it

Meanwhile Nancy in the background is just working through her compulsory heterosexuality and figuring out she's a lesbian and she has been halfway in love with Robin since the Creel thing

Also I feel like Vicky would try to be supportive but she wouldn't get it but Nancy does

i have this scene

in my mind

like robin's nightmares are fine for vicky, it's when she's waking up all panicky and she needs steve in a way Vicky just doesn't get why, it's not that she doesn't try to be supportive but she doesn't get it

but one night when robin sleeps over at nancy's and she wakes up with steve's name on her lips, she gets nancy's hand on her back drawing small circles, little movement reminding her she's not alone and nancy calling steve on the walkie, not because robin asked but because nancy knew it was what robin needed, robin fell asleep again with nancy's arms around her and steve's voice on the walkie that night

and then in the morning nancy is like "don't mention it, sometimes i need to call jon, just to hear his voice, i understand the need" bc i'm a firm believer that jonathan is to nancy what steve is to robin and i will take no criticism (but i will accept that it might also be eddie and not jonathan but like also they are both her bestfriends you honor)

but robin is like feeling this queer dissonance bc she still doesn't know nancy isn't straight and it's like, yeah, but it's different. It's always different for me. you call jonathan because he's your boyfriend, that's what couples do, i call steve because he's an extension of me i didn't knew was walking outside of my body before i found him and suddenly i was whole again, i don't want to ever kiss him but i want to spent my life with him but she doesn't say that, because nancy might be kind and understanding, but she still was nancy the priss wheeler and robin doesn't want to lose girls' nights and sleepovers in one bed and this easy friendship because she's different again, so she just smiles and later when steve arrives to pick her up she cries in his shoulder

Like this scene is mostly a foreshadowing of how much Nancy fits and gets it

Also Steve and Robin platonic soulmates supremacy so a lot if this is also platonic soulmates stobin because Robin realizes she's going to leave for college soon and she doesn't want to leave without Steve, even if he won't be alone in hawkings bc he has the kids and Eddie (bc Eddie lives, ofc, i'm not killing my baby, lmao, also there is a steddie sideplot, imma talk abt it in a second)

But Steve is hers and she is Steve's first and she doesn't want to leave him, can't imagine, feels like leaving half of her body and it's not fair, but also can't take it upon herself to ask him to leave with her because she doesn't think she can handle it if he says no

And so like the fic would starts in late April/early may and Robin is trying so hard with holding the ones she has so close because she's going to leave and she's trying to grasp on the last crumbles of her teenage years and onto her relationship with Vicky and throughout all of this Nancy is this constant that just is there, steady, safe and becoming actually one of her best friends

And it surprises her, because it was easy to be friends with Eddie once they bonded over being gay and also caring for Steve, it was somewhat comfortable to have a budding relationship with Jonathan and Argyle, caring for the kids came with caring for Steve because they are somewhat also a part of him and he is part of her so they are also hers but Nancy always was so unreachable, so far away so untouchable, except she wasn't

Except she was there inviting Robin to sleepovers and over milkshakes and stupid diners and going over college application with her and talking about Steve and Jonathan and Eddie with fondness because these are their boys and somehow Nancy has become an integral part of Robin's life

And so a lot of the first part of the fic is Robin trying to hold onto all those things before she moves to college

And then Vicky breaks up with Robin in the middle of july, and it's a nice weather, Robin wishes it was raining and the thing is that even when breaking up with her Vicky is just so sweetly nice, so perfect and Robin wishes she could hate her, that she could be mad, but she only feels sad, so incredibly fucking sad, it feels like something that she saw coming, because she did, she knew it was going to end like this, but even when breaking up with her Vicky wasn't mean, was nice enough to tell Robin, to lie, she just doesn't want to do long distance

it's when Steve is comforting her abt the break up that Robin ask him to come with her, she already had her heart ripped out once today, it's a little bit self-destructing, it's maybe her punishing herself for her codependency that in her eyes cost her her relationship, but he says yes, is ecstatic, because wherever she goes he won't hesitate to follow, they are a package deal after all, somehow they also rope Eddie into it and it makes sense, it makes sense to leave with both Steve and Eddie that have become such vital parts of her, steve is an extension of her outside of her body, but Eddie is someone who understands and fits between the spaces that she and Steve leave behind seamlessly, it would make sense to leave and take them with her

quiet interlude to explain the steddie side plot because it's now kind of necessary

so i have this in mind that like steve knows he's bi before the whole vecna, he figured it out with robin after starcourt

and robin already feels like having one other queer person in hawkings is extraordinary but then vecna happens and eddie joins the crew, eddie with his bandana, eddie with his big boy and chains and jokes and attitude and robin and steve argue back and forth if he is queer or not, while also steadily forming a friendship with him and it's just robin wants him to be so bad, because a part of her feels like eddie understands the queer parts of her that steve bless him never could, bc steve somehow could hide behind the heteronormality but robin and eddie never had a choice, they were always too weird, too different for that, but robin is afraid, it's steve, brave steve that ends up coming out to eddie first in a comment that he plays of as nonchalant but robin sees right through him, he's afraid and yet, and yet he barrels through, holds himself under eddie's gaze and is brave because that what steve is, brave

and so they're my three queer best friends and i love them

Also this is once again me pushing Steve is a brave, beautiful boi agenda

and robin sees how eddie looks at steve and steve at eddie and she thinks that maybe steve just is oblivious (i mean after they all came out to each other, thanks to steve) but then she talks to steve about it

and the thing is that steve knows that eddie wants him, that he's attracted to him, but steve actually fucking likes eddie, might actually fucking love him

and after the whole being bullshit and all the girls that went out with him because they wanted king steve and not steve he doesn't know, doesn't trust himself to know if eddie likes him the same way

He doesn't trust himself to not be bullshit again

and eddie is a bit of coward, like let's face it, that boy is ready to pine his whole life for steve harrington if it gets him to just exist in his space

and so steve just doesn't let himself have this

because he would rather to have him as a friend than an ex-hookup and he couldn't have handled it if that's all what eddie wanted to be, so they're like tragically pinning, they're my idiots you honor

So then the summer is ending and so they organize a party to celebrate the last days they have together, the whole party and when there is only a spicy six left Robin, my baby comes out as a lesbian!! And she's so afraid of Nancy's reaction, but Nancy, beautiful, kind, stubborn Nancy just takes her hand and says with a smile that she's glad that she told them and her smile is beautiful, happy and Robin feels like a weight is lifted off of her because now, now she doesn't feel like she might lose her friendship with Nancy too, because she was so afraid that once Nancy will know, it will be the end of them, it's why she waiting until both of them are going away, until the pain of missing her won't be as visible because Nancy isn't supposed to be there with her anyway

So after that

Nancy ofc goes to NY

Robin, Steve and Eddie somehow land in Chicago and my boy Eddie is a mechanic for sure bc i love the idea, Robin ofc will be studying and I haven't decided what Steve will be doing

And Jonathan and Argyle will stay in Hawkins, taking their gap year

Robin thinks it's partly why Steve wasn't as afraid to come with her, knowing Jon will be there keeping an eye on Hawkins, on the kids, because it's not that Steve doesn't trust Joyce and Hopper but he doesn't trust them to call them when things go bad, and kids are always too preoccupied to call when things go wrong and he trust, trusts Jon to call when things go code red in Hawkins, also i think Jon deserves a gap year, let that boy relax please

And so Nancy calls, all of them do actually, the kids and Jonathan with Argyle, I kind of like to think that like sometimes all three Robin and Steve and Eddie are gathered around the phone talking with whoever calls, like Steve is painting Robin's nails while listening to Eddie and Jon arguing about some music thing on the phone while Robin keeps adding her opinion only to stir shit up even more and sometimes it's Eddie and Steve parenting Dustin while Robin just lays next to them doing her school assignments

But Nancy calls when she also knows Robin is just there alone, Nancy calls and asks her about Chicago and college and it's good, it's good talking with her

Also I have this scene in my head where Nancy and Robin talk about Barb, it's late and Robin is alone in the apartment, Eddie and Steve gone somewhere together and Nancy is talking about how sometimes she finds it hard, knowing that Barb probably wouldn't have recognized her now, that she changed, grew up and she isn't the same person that Barb was friends with anymore (my personal headcanon is that Nancy didn't even want to be a journalist before Barb's death, but after seeing how they covered it up, how the press twisted and manipulated the truth she wanted to be the one good one, for Barb, a sense of justice paid to her through others, it's why she wanted the facts for Eddie so hard)

And Robin asks her how she deals with it and Nancy says that she just has to, it won't go anywhere, she won't stop aging, "besides" she says "eddie recently told me something and, don't tell him that, but it was actually pretty smart"

"Impressive for him" Nancy giggles and it's good to know her giggles make her feel the same feeling of accomplishment even through the phone

"Anyway, he told me that we survived so we could change. That we are the lucky ones that get to change, dead people don't change. So it's good, to sometimes, become something new"

And it sticks with Robin and she somehow that leads her to asking Steve to cut her hair even shorter because hair holds memory and she wants to have space for new ones, the good ones, she wants to see them grow (one of this days I will think of a sapphic idea that doesn't involve hair, i swear, but today is not the day) also both Robin and Steve dye a strand of their hair pink, for platonic soulmate unity reasons

so anyway chicago is good, good for her and Steve and Eddie and they're thriving and they're finding queer bars and are growing up, becoming adults together and like Robin manages to hook up with a girl and meet more queer people, grow into herself and there a set backs and bad days, like once a girl started roleplaying a cop as a part of foreplay and asked "where do you work" in a voice that reminded Robin too much of the russians and the torture, she cried for an hour and a half on the girl's floor, before she managed to exhaust herself and only then she managed to give out their number so the girl could call Steve to pick her up, she cried in Stevie's arms the whole night after that because she just felt broken like yes she could move, she could grow up, she could experience new things but the trauma will always be a part of her

and so then! we have like two important seeing nancy moments

one where everybody comes back to hawkings for smh idk if will be holidays or smh or smh different, but even if nancy and robin called on a regular it's the first time she's seeing her since they went away for college and during that time robin finally catches up to nancy and realizes she's in love with her

But she thinks it's hopeless because Nancy hasn't yet came out to Robin (in my mind Eddie helped her in figuring it out during summer, she came out to Jon in the meantime after moving but before this coming home and during the stay in Hawkins she will come out to Steve but it will be unnecessary bc honestly Steve suspected that Nancy liked Robin since fucking the first words of the fic) and so Robin pulls away

Also during this visit is when she asks Wayne how he dealt with dating people after going to war, did he ever manage to separate his trauma and his dating life and he tells her that there are people who will understand and love her with her trauma not despite of her (with like a heavy look towards Nancy bc Uncle Wayne knows what the fuck is up)

Oh also per Chicago being good for the boys, it's where Steve finally allows himself to be loved, it's where they come home to each other, it's where they stay with each other, it's where they slow dance together in the kitchen, it's where Steve realizes that Eddie is here to stay, when Steve tells Robin he kissed Eddie over dinner, they both cry, simply because they are happy, Robin is so glad that Steve finally, finally is happy and healthy and is letting himself be loved how he deserves

and then we have a second time where the whole spicy six gather in New york to celebrate with nancy i'm thinking maybe new year??

and then nancy comes out as a lesbian and like than robin realizes what nancy was doing all this time, she realizes that they are steve and eddie (because eddie has waited, all this time until steve was ready, was right beside him when steve blossomed into someone who could trust that eddie wants him back, eddie waited and nancy... nancy waited too) and it's like the both of them go to bed together ofc and robin has this like feeling of, they had time, they finally have time, and they could take it in whatever pace they want, this like finality of feeling that they are finally on the same page and the rest is like fluff

Also something something Nancy belonging to NY and being even more beautiful somewhere where she is healthy and happy and thriving, something something about rosy cheeks and long coats and frosty kisses

So i guess i just want Robin to like grow into herself and who she is in relationships and have experience and grow comfortable in herself before she let herself love Nancy, i want them to be friends first and also i want the slow burn of it all

#i'm putting this here bc i kind of want attention but also i have so many unwritten fic ideas that i never shared here only with my friends #that its just #and like i said ill probably never write this one bc recently i have been distracted with a nancy-centric ronance fic idea in my head but #i still love this one a lot also i have still so many ideas abt it that i havent written out like the whole steddie side plot lives rent #free in my mind #btw if you follow me for a while you've probably seen me talking abt screaming fic ideas into my friends dms and if you ever wondered how #it looks like this is literally plugged from one of my dms with my friend sbsjsn so now you know #dom's au idea of the day #ronance #platonic stobin #steddie #fruity four #stranger things #robin buckley #nancy wheeler #steve harrington #eddie munson #fic idea

[icewindandboringhorror]

I still very loathe the Media Trope of ‘’cold genius man doesn’t feel emotions and never has relationships... UNTIL.. one random relatively bland Preddy Woman comes along and warps his entire personality and ability to think, his heart has grown and his seeming asexuality has evaporated, he is now Normal :)” or whatever like... AS a walking generic hermit archetype myself.. we would NOT act like that .... just let people be detached weirdos in peace, you cowards .. OR, don’t bother to write one in the first place if you find us too boring to exist realistically in our natural state lol.. pathetic 

#the only exception to this is its okay if he develops some pesudo-romantic psychologial fixation on one of his long suffering male sidekicks #or assistants or whatever (since this character acrhetype ALWAYS has some sort of like Straight Man Every Man helper to follow #him around and be an audience stand in. sometimes multiple like a whole team of assistants. sometimes just one etc.) #like a strange not-entirely-romance-but-mutualy-unhealthy-comedic-codependence w someone you worked w 25+ yrs COULD be in character. sure. #ASIDE from that one exception though..... just keep them aromantic and asexual.. why would someone who has been that way for their #entire fucking life suddenly be like ''well I've known this woman three weeks but she's really hot! whoops!'' #''guess I'm going to act completely out of character! sometimes booba so booby it fundametally alters the dna of me personality. you know ho #w it is'' .. like shut up.. explode #It's not that I project personally onto these characters (writers are bad at writing them and they're generally annoying as shit) BUT just #like... coming FROM the perspective OF a cold detached ''robot'' seeming hermit freak.. like textbook scholar wizard man locked #away in a tower somewhere type personality... You just watch shows sometimes and you can SEE that the writers are trying to write #the Character Archetype that is your actual realworld personality and you're just like 'we do NOT fucking act like that!!!' lol #you know ? like .. i don't actually care about the characters themselves but more just.. the principle of the thing. staying true to what #has been set up. You can't be like ''oh yeah this is your typical cold detached hermit weirdo with zero interest in human relationships for #the most part blah blah blah'' and then 5 minutes later be like ''WAIT GUYS!! LOOK! they're still NORMAL! look they love booba #too!!! haha hashtag Relatable!!'' .. what have you done to him.. you've massacred the archtype.. cowardly fool #Also I'm referencing them as male because this character archtetype is usually male but the same thing can apply for other gendered versions #of the archetype. it's ALWAYS annoying. no matter what it is lol. GOD AND IT'S even worse when they're supposed to be like hundreds or thous #ands of years old like.. some sort of supernatural being who's ''above it all'' because they've seen the world's cycles for so long #and blah blah and then it's like ''omg.. suddenly into romance.. for some reason all 900 years of my life nobody has ever been good #enough but YOU.. random ass person who I met 30 minutes ago and are completely average in every way or maybe you have like one #special power or are smart or something but apparently somehow I've lived 900 years without ever meeting a single other smart person #or whatever but WOW.. you... instant soulamtes.. I am no longer aromantic and asexual. I am also no longer smart.'' #at least if it's a human with a normal lifespan you can be like 'well they were only 30. maybe they genuinely did just have their first #sexul awakening' or something but.. you're telling me like.. 900 years??? 1000 years?? and NOW they're like 'whooa!!' lol #Which obviously all aroace people are different.. all people with autism or schizoid pd or any other mental illnesses that can sometimes #lend people towards that type of 'weird hermit' archetype are all different. plenty of these people WILL have relationships and sex and desi #re those things. but it's like.. if you are OBVIOUSLY setting out to write that one VERY specific archetype within the broader archetype #then GO ALL THE WAY!! you cant have someone be like HALF-detached partial-hemrit sometimes-maybe-genuis or whatever #or I guess you can but like. it should be that way from the beginning. it's the random sudden shift in personality thats jarring

[doppelnatur]

I think some White people use representation, inclusion and diversity as like reasons and justifications to make kind of insensitive and appropriative works

#like idk how to say this but like #if you've never spoken with an indigenous person is your video game about indigenous people representation? #if you don't have a close black friend is your black character representation? #like idk ofc step out of your little box etc #idk. how much write what you know is good and how much like. does it limit the representation #ok no wait i think I figured it out actually. having a game about idk school with indigenous characters when you're informed and maybe #idk talked to an indigenous sensitivity reader. that's good and fine. #making a game about indigenous american life as a white German who has never even texted an indigenous person; #? #that's a lil. odd? #idk idk idk #just. talk to people man #I'm vagueing two ppl from my uni #one I'm maybe being unfair to #i just kind of dislike her #but that one character feels like. idk. i get why you need him? but it feels very... why is he Like That #i feel like the game is more normal and Ok than that comic. but also I've only seen pictures not the whole thing #but yeah #i should not go on Instagram

[this-is-a-url]

Homestuck ships can so easily be "experts warn that polycule could expand to cover all of seattle" style, but then that sucks so much bc nobody else ships it but you

Nepeta: :33 < This is my moirail Equius, and his matesprit Karkat, and Karkat's boyfriend Dave, and their girlfriend Jane

#LIKE HOW PERFECT WOULD THAT SHIP BE #Movie nights would be absolute hell. None of these bitches can shut up for a movie except Equius and #he would be busy holding Nepeta back so he can't take out Karkat's eye over shipping disagreements #like Jane/Dave/Karkat (all dating) is the amazing and (qpr) Nepeta/Equius mixed with (romantic) Equius/Karkat is THE best dynamic #so just throw those together and you get perfection + Equius and Dave's interaction in cannon is great already #I wanna see them all thrown in a hive/house and just see how it works #I wanna see Nepeta‚ Jane‚ Equius‚ and Dave all painting their nails together on the floor (Karkat's off reading a book somewhere nearby) #Nepeta and Jane are the only ones who actually know what they're doing so they end up painting Equius' and Dave's too (respectively) #Equius DOES try to paint his own at first but his fine moter control still isn't that great rn (though he's getting better) #so he keeps getting it all over his actual hand. #When he starts to get anygry and frustrated after so many mistakes is the point where Nepeta offers to help him #He ends up getting nails that /SO/ do not fit his color scheme (bc he didn't actually request any color and she just did what she wanted) #but he doesn't complain. He just looks at her handiwork fondly bc how could he ever be upset over something she so lovingly did for him? #Also Karkat helps Nepeta rearrange her shipping wall. He thinks all of her choices are incorect and complains the whole time‚ but it's one #of those things he'll do while grumbling when it's a ''Hey this is weird‚ though it makes my weirdo happy so fiiiiiiiiiiiine'' #Dave annoys Equius to death but they're still friends. #Just with a bit more insults and degrading comments that Equius will apologize for later when things settle down. #I mean it's not like they don't have super fun times between themselves tho. You've seen their conversation when Dave got the broken sword #Also Equius was canonically attracted to Dave during that conversation so like..... #And unrelated to that: If Karkat and/or Dave are ever having a fight with John they bake shit to annoy him #Everyone prefers when Karkat's the one to do it though because Dave ''Doritoes is a food group'' Strider makes the house smell like smoke #while Karkat's baking is only ever sugary goodness #It's an easy way for the God of Wind to lower the house's temperature by like 40° but who the fuck cares when there's cookies and/or cake. #*Jane (<- It think. I'm p sure I put ''John'' on accident but tumblr wont let me see my tags in full anymore so I can't tell) #On second thought‚ I believe Jane only dislikes cake and Betty Crocker stuff specifically #but fuck it we're already in au land so why not add more hcs to the mix #url rambles

[z0zimus]

good lord. I need me a man that's a bit of a dick. a gf with "I will say every thought that comes to my head without considering if it's rude" autism. i'm so tired of "nice" people I'm so tired of masking I'm so tired of ppl being surprised when "I had to research how to not be an arsehole for years to start making friends" me is, amazingly, a bit of a dick sometimes

#p #my whole family are assholes some of the time #so far every single person who insists they're never a bit of a dick has insane meltdowns bc they bottle everything up #it's so healthy to be an asshole sometimes #like the healthiest possible thing is for someone to say something dickish; someone says *hey that doesn't feel good* nd then they apologis #I have autism. I literally have Is Rude Without Realising It disorder. I talk frequently abt how shit it is to meet new ppl #bc I have to be so so so fake to avoid offending them bc if I let my guard down even a little I end up *insulting* ppl #all my strongest friendships were built on me unknowingly breaking their hearts and then apologising profusely when they tell me #I've seen enough of *nice* ppl to know that they're all just ppl pleasers that will snap when you've crossed a line they never told you abt #the only exceptions are ex-assholes. ppl that are older and so tired and zen now they just don't speak a lot #even then though. they still end up being kind of an asshole sometimes

[paganinpurple]

AO3 Etiquette -UPDATED

Based on both decent and not so decent replies, I have made some changes to my original post below.

It would seem a whole new kind of AO3 reader/writer is emerging and it is becoming clear not everyone quite understands how the website community works. Here is some basic guidance on how most people expect you to go about using AO3 to keep this a fun community archive that funtions correctly:

As well as likes, kudos is for when the story was interesting enough to make you finish reading. If it sucked or was badly written, you probably left. If you finished it, you liked it - so kudos.

If you really liked it, you should try to comment. It can be long and detailed or a literal keysmash. Writers don't care, we just love comments.

No critisism unless the author has specifically asked or agreed to hear it (so use your notes to say if you want some constructive feedback). Even constructive critisism is a no-no unless an author note tells you it's okay. No, posting it online is not an open invitation for that. Many people write as a fun hobby or a way to cope with, among other things, insecurity and just want to share. Don't ruin that for them. I've seen so many authors just stop writing coz they can't handle the negative emotions the critism brings, and it's only meant to be a fun thing shared for free (pointing out tagging errors is not included in this).

Do not comment to ask the author to write/update something else. It's tacky and off-putting and will probably have the opposite effect than the one you want.

There is no algorithm, it's an archive. Use the search and filter function to add/remove the pairings/characters/tropes etc. you want to read about and it will find you the fics that fit the bill.

For this to work, writers must tag and rate stories. This avoids readers finding the wrong things and missing the stuff they want. I don't care how cringy that trope is in your eyes - it gets tagged.

The tag exception is if you don't want to tag a million things or spoil your story, you can rate it as "chose not to use warnings," and maybe tag the bare minimum.

Don't censor tags. How can someone exclude a tag if the word isn't typed out correctly? There are no content bans for terms so don't censor them.

If the tags are mostly content/trigger warnings, especially if they are things considered very fucked up or graphic, you might want to use "dead dove - do not eat" to ensure people know that you're not messing around with tags and what they get is exactly what you've warned them about.

Character A/Character B means a ROMANTIC or SEXUAL relationship of some kind. Character A&Character B is PLATONIC, like friendship or family.

Nothing is banned. This is an rule because banning one thing is a slipperly slope to banning another and another, until nothing is allowed anymore. Do not expect anyone to censor for you. Because of the tags system, you are responsible for your own reading experience.

People can create new chapters and sequels/fic series any time after they "complete" a story. So it's considered perfectly normal to subscribe, even to a finished story. You can even subscribe to the author instead just to cover your bases.

Do not repost stories or change the publishing date without an extremely good reason (like a complete top to bottom rewrite or an exchange youve written for going public). It's an archive, not social media. No one cares what's the most recent, only what fits their tag needs.

Instead of deleting a story you wrote if you hate it - consider making it anonymous or orphaning it so others can still enjoy it, without it being connected to your name anymore. If you still want to delete it, fair enough.

It's come to my attention that metaworks ARE allowed on AO3, which is something I wasn't aware of. So if you do post an essay or theory, please tag it as such so others can choose to search for it or exclude it. Art is also allowed.

The only reason this archive works is because NON ONE PROFITS. Do not link to your ko-fi or patreon or mention monetary gain in any way or you violate the terms and risk having your account removed. If anyone does link, it leaves the archive open to people claiming it's for profit and having the whole thing removed.

I KNOW there's plenty more I missed but I'm trying to cover most of the basics that people seem to be struggling with.

I invite anyone to add to this, but please explain, don't berate.

#ao3 #using ao3 #archive of our own #fanfiction #fanworks

[neo-shitty]

spring day never latches on to a permanent face. it takes the form of the people i miss whom i have no way of reconnecting with. ever since i read that message in my inbox, it has taken the form of you, kesya.

#i read that the night before a big midterm examination and tbh i haven't had the headspace to deal with the weight of the emotions until now #tumblr deactivations always bore more weight bc it's permanent and ig thats why it hurt a lot more i'm heartbroken #i didn't realize until now how much your deactivation has wiped—every ask sent; every reblogged interacted with; your tags; your writing #i've looked up to you for a while haha long before i've bombarded your inbox with lengthy asks abt bsd; i loved your writing first #then your thoughts second and how well articulated you were and eventually your whole being; how you consumed content as a whole #whenever you loved something you loved it in full; every piece of media you enjoyed was passed on with such appreciation #it showed in the way you passionately talked abt things; bsd-86-eren-aot to name a few. i always loved talking to you. #you always reciprocated my energy #i'm sorry for never getting around to answering your last ask i've been so busy with life. and i'm also sorry for finding out too late. #i can't quite sum up all my feelings into these tags. i just miss you a lot and i don't know where these emotions should go #but i hope they find you somehow. i'm not really going anywhere so i hope you'll find me here when the time comes. #who am i going to talk to when bsd s6 (whenever that may be) comes out? 🙁🙁 #your presence is dearly missed kesya #i've received asks on your deactivation and have seen posts from your mutuals #for the past year since i've stopped writing here you've been the only thing i came for #i was always so curious to hear what you thought of the recent episodes or chapters. rest assured i'll love media the way you did. #just to carry on the bits and pieces i've absorbed from you somehow haha #i hope this finds you someday and you don't owe us an explanation or anything. pop into my asks if you do or just pm me directly. #i miss you. i'm sorry. i hope you're doing well wherever you are. #lots of love from a tumblr penpal-ish ahaha #love you!! #by-moonflower #kesya #kesya please find this T_T

[monsterblogging]

"I know JK Rowing is a terrible person but her books are so good-"

You sure about that?

I mean, just for a start, have you taken a good look at her fantasy creatures lately? A whole bunch of them are straight-up based on malicious and dehumanizing stereotypes about actual people.

Remember the werewolves? And being a werewolf was made into a kind of metaphor for having AIDS?

And you know how AIDS was first associated with gay men? And how conservatives back in the day were claiming gay men were preying on children in order to convert them to gayness?

Remember how Fenrir Greyback preyed on children in particular? Yeah, she put that subtext in there. She was an adult in the 90's. She knew damn well what she was doing.

Remember the house elves? Remember how most of them loved to serve and needed to have a home and a master or else they just wouldn't know what to do with themselves?

Did you know that's literally what slavers in the American South said about the Black people they kept enslaved? Go look up the happy slave myth.

Do I even need to get into the goblins and the antisemitic tropes they're based on? No, folkloric goblins were not gold-hoarding bankers waiting for their chance to stab humanity in the back.

"But the characters are so good!"

Are you kidding me?

Most of her characters are pretty one-dimensional, including Harry. Her idea of making a morally complicated character is giving a tragic past to a bully. Numerous characters are little more than stereotypes. (Looking at Fleur right now.) Literally anybody, including you, can easily make dozens of characters just as good, if not better. (It doesn't exactly take a lot of character designing skill to go, "hey, actually, having a sad backstory doesn't make it okay to bully children" or "hey, maybe I should not base a character on the first stereotype that pops into my head.")

"But the rest of the worldbuilding!"

Sorry, but her worldbuilding is just as basic as her characters. Magical castles and secret passages are stock tropes. Magical people who keep their true nature secret from humanity is the premise of pretty much every White Wolf TTRPG. Most of her fantasy creatures are just common European fairy tale and folklore creatures with shitty stereotypes projected onto them.

I'm not saying "basic worldbuilding bad." I'm saying, you could do just as good, if not better, with minimal effort.

Also there's her magical bioessentialism, where only Harry's abusive blood relatives could provide him with supernatural protection from Voldemort. Rowling thus effectively declared that non-biological family isn't quite real family, and that abusive biofamily can give you some essential thing that a loving, supportive family that isn't related to you just can't.

The Hogwarts houses are one of the most insidious elements of her worldbuilding. The idea of being sorted gives you a little dopamine hit because wow now you have a li'l niche where you belong!

But the actual function of the houses and sorting system and the House Cup is teaching children to see each other as rivals, and ensure that the most toxic views of the upper class get passed on to every new batch of kids sorted into Slytherin.

Hogwarts effectively prepares children for a dystopia where magic serves to distract its citizens from how nightmarishly awful it is. Economic inequality is so bad that people like Arthur and Molly Weasley can barely afford to put their kids through school, casual sadism is just an accepted norm in everyday society, and non-humans are second class citizens. Rowling sorta acts like she thinks this is a bad thing with certain lines she gave to Dumbledore, but in the end, her special boy protagonist becomes an auror; IE, a defender of the status quo. So.

If you've never seen it, Lily Simpson's video goes into even more detail on how the worldbuilding of Harry Potter is actually incredibly fucked up, and how it betrays small-minded attitudes on Rowling's part. There's no separating the art from this artist, because Rowling's rotten values pour out of nearly every page.

Yes, there are many things in Harry Potter that evoke feelings and inspire people, but there's absolutely nothing in it that this series has a monopoly on. You can find those same experiences in much, much better media.

#harry potter #jk rowling #Youtube

[lowkeyremi]

Arranged Marriage hcs with Toji (fem reader)

AU where Toji has cursed energy and was picked by the zenin clan. (he still hates them lol) also he doesn't meet mamagumi so megu is your biological son in this au :3

note: just some quick hcs cuz i couldn't get this thought out of my head. I've seen a bunch of arranged marriage satoru related things but I thought I'd switch it up. mentions of pregnancy

Arrangedhusband!Toji hates his family and refuses to get married just to fuck them over. (they want an heir)

Arrangedhusband!Toji who goes on a complete rampage when the news about his soon to be marriage finally reaches him through hushed whispers of some maids.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who immediately goes to see Naobito, former head of the Zenin Clan to ask what the fuck is going on.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who is enraged when he hears "you were given the opportunity to settle down yourself, but you didn't so we took matters into our own hands."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who requests to not have a wedding, he'll just sign the damn papers and get it over with.

Arrangedhusband!Toji doesn't visit you for at least a week upon your arrival. He's still pissed.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who finally decides to go visit you, he knocks on your door. You were given your own room to adjust to everything even though Naobito wanted you to be with Toji.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who's shocked when Mai opens the door and he sees you getting your hair done by Maki. The twins decorated your hair with a bunch of different flowers. (they're like maybe 10 in this)

Arrangedhusband!Toji who just stares at you. He doesn't say a word because he doesn't really know what to say. He didn't even know what you looked like until right now.

Arrangedhusband!Toji snaps out of his trance when you break the silence. "Good morning, Toji. It's nice to finally meet you." He catches on to your attitude at the end of your sentence and he doesn't even realize his lip quirking upward. Here he was thinking you'd be some damsel in distress, but it turns out you're pretty confident.

Arrangedhusband!Toji responds with "Uh, hey.." Is that the best he could come up with? You've left him at a loss for words.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who tries to get his shit together and deepens his voice to try and intimidate you a little. "Mornin', [name]. I'll send some maids over this way later. You are to accompany me for dinner tonight."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who hides a growing smile when you say, "Taking me on a first date after getting married? I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be the other way around."

Arrangedhusband!Toji sits at the table waiting for your arrival. After seeing you he wanted to spend some alone time getting to know you, but his mother insisted on throwing a proper welcome dinner with the whole family.

Arrangedhusband!Toji requested that you sit right next to him. When you arrive someone ushers you to your seat. He whispers quietly enough for only you to hear, "being late to a family dinner isn't a good look for ya, pretty."

"well, excuse me for getting lost like three times." you say with a roll of your eyes. Naobito clears his throat, and Toji sighs.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who mumbles "thank you for the food." so everyone could start eating. He gets a little defensive when Naobito bombards you with questions, "I hope you are settling in well, but I'll get straight to business. When do you think you'll be ready to bear a child?"

Arrangedhusband!Toji who gets ready to speak up for you but you quickly cut him off, "Not anytime soon, sir. No offense. I just met your nephew today. I did not come here to be bred like some dog. I came here to settle the dispute between our families." Everyone is shocked by your words. You just told off the former head of the clan..

Arrangedhusband!Toji is proud of you. "I agree with her." Naobito gives him a sour look before responding, "Toji, you need to get a better hold on your woman. She should have some manners."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who gets up from the table and hauls you over his shoulder. It's embarrassing to say the least but neither of you speak a word until you're far enough away.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who sets you down, a smirk prominent on his face, "That was so bad ass. No one's ever spoke to him that way."

"Really? Not even you? That's surprising, you seem like the rebellious type."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who really starts to grow on you. He follows you everywhere and he learns something new about you every day, as do you too. He never restricts your freedom and supports many of your actions.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who will even spar with you sometimes when you're looking to improve.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who feels his heart swell a little bit when you kiss him. He's never felt anything like this before, and he doesn't want to admit that he'll get used to it.

Arrangedhusband!Toji invites you to finally move into his own bedroom, since "we've been married for a few months now."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who likes seeing your stuff alongside his in his room.

Arrangedhusband!Toji feels happier than he has in years. All his family wanted to do was train him to perfection and treat 'worthless' women like shit. He didn't want any of that though. So he sees you as a blessing in disguise.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who itches to give you a baby after seeing how you are around his twin cousins. You're gentle, but you never forget to scold them when they get into trouble.

Arrangedhusband!Toji after your second year anniversary brings up the idea to you, "Not for the selfish reasons my uncle wants. Just for us. We could even live somewhere else." You two are sitting in your shared bedroom. His eyes tell no lies, "What do you mean by live somewhere else? I don't think it matters how far we go, baby. If Naobito catches wind of a potential Zenin heir he'll track us down."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who assures you he could take care of this situation, if you wanted to have a baby. He doesn't want his future child/children to have to go through the same abuse he went through.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who doesn't know that you're already a month or two pregnant.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who has one of his "friends" come get you to take you to your new home. "Toji, you should come with me. I don't think this is a good idea."

"I'll see you in a day or two. I love you, baby. Gojo, no funny business or I'll fuck you up." He threatens.

"Are you doubting me, my dear friend? I wouldn't let anything happen to your precious wife." Toji flip him off. You watch as his figure gets smaller and smaller until you can't see him anymore. (they're frenemies in this au)

Arrangedhusband!Toji who immobilizes his uncle, which takes great effort. He doesn't come out fully unscathed. He's okay, though. He's doing it for his and your future.

Arrangedhusband!Toji who utters something to Naobito before leaving the Zenin clan, "I don't ever want to see your face again, you old geezer. Don't ever come looking for me or my wife, because the next time we meet, I'll kill you."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who knocks on the door of your new apartment and is relieved to see that you're just how he left you.

You gasp at his beat up stature and you sit him down to clean him up.

"They'll never bother us again." He mutters and he sees you smile a little bit.

"I'll miss the twins," you say with a little sigh. He moves his big hand to cup your face as you are trying to wipe the blood off of his, "You've taught them plenty. I'm sure they'll follow our path and make it out of the clan sooner or later."

Arrangedhusband!Toji who is thrilled when you tell him you're pregnant.

Arrangedhusband!Toji goes to extreme lengths to protect you and you have to remind him you can still accomplish things on your own.

Arrangedhusband!Toji Husband!Toji who has both your last names changed to Fushiguro to help hide his identity. You actually debated with him about this.

"Toji, you literally just chose the first name you saw on a site of Japanese last names. We need to put thought into it."

"Oh come on baby, you gotta admit Toji Fushiguro sounds better than Toji Zenin." He never fails to find a lazy way out of things.

Husband!Toji who lets a single tear fall from his eye when he sees you cradling your little boy.

"He looks just like you." You grumble playfully and his lips quirk up into a smirk, "Eh what can I say? He got the good genes."

You fight the urge to hit him with a pillow.

Husband!Toji tells the nurse the name you two agreed on for your son, "Megumi Fushiguro."

Husband!Toji who always gets scolded by you for using bad words around your son.

"Fuck!" Megumi yells when he colors outside of the line. Your head whips around so fast and Toji looks away.

"Gumi! Don't say that. That is a very bad word." You tell him. He tilts his head to the side, "Well Dad says them."

"Does he now? I'm pretty sure Dad knows he shouldn't say those words." After a minute Toji thinks he's in the clear so he turns his head back to see you glaring at him.

"I won't do it again." He hears you mumble 'liar.'

Husband!Toji who's mad that despite his looks, his son is a complete mama's boy. "Hey kid, wanna head to the park for a little 'while?"

"Can mama come?" Your husband grunts.

"Nah, it'll just be me and you. Father and son." He says with a grin hoping to bait him.

Megumi goes back to his video he's watching. With an uninterested tone he responds, "Oh, then I don't wanna go."

He rolls his eyes and walks away, "Well whatever."

Husband!Toji who decided he wants a do over, and gives you the proper wedding you deserve.

Husband!Toji who loves you and his son very much. He couldn't have asked for anything better than this. You are his blessing.

tagging @blkkizzat bc this is her man LMAO

#toji fushiguro #toji zenin #toji x reader #toji fushiguro x reader #fushiguro toji x reader #fushiguro toji #toji zenin x reader #toji fluff #jjk #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #zenin clan #megumi fushiguro

[inkskinned]

the problem is that being single is seen as the consolidation prize, and not the natural neutral state of being-a-person. at the end of the movie or the book or the poetry, there is a person waiting for you at the altar, and they love you. if the play is a comedy, everyone gets married. the metaphor is about how you are not-whole. the metaphor is about how everyone is going to be happily-ever-after. the metaphor is that romantic love is the most important resource on the planet, not just all-love. all-love is not a thing, that is a disappointment. the treasure is not the friends we made along the way. the treasure is the girl you landed.

the metaphor is that you cannot be alone, that means you are broken. are you getting over someone? that is acceptable, you can be getting over someone, but not for long. you must be single because you would rather not be single. you must be single and looking to not-be-single. you must want to date, eventually.

friendship and community are never seen as being equal-to or even-better than romantic connection. that person is your one! you need to find them. you need to hunt through the sand particles until you can shift out some kind of gem. this is regardless to your own experience of the beach and the sun. you need to be somewhere with someone.

if you are taking this time alone to heal, that is so sad. everyone gives you this little pitying look. the understanding is that you are not actually happier than you were before you were single. it is seen as a sort of pity - oh, you are choosing yourself, making yourself the priority? - that isn't quite right. you must mean that you are making yourself ready for the right person. you are just laying the bed better this time. open up your heart. you'll find them, we promise!

what do you mean you're really-truly genuinely-very happy? you are probably misremembering what it was like to be in a relationship. and besides, once you meet your person, that time will look grey and bland and wasted. your person is the only way for you to see in color. so what if you have taken this time - for the first time in your entire life - to actually-for-real do the fucking work. you can be proud of yourself, sure. but the way we need to know that you got better is that you get a partner. you're healed enough for the next bad part!

people don't choose to be single, they just say they're choosing to be single - they actually mean "nobody wants to date me." it doesn't matter how many people you have gently rejected or how many times you've talked it over carefully in therapy. what matters is that you are single, and by all accounts - that means you are something worth our pity. your successes and life all seem pale in the sunlight. sure, you have done amazing things and finally found your way in life. what matters is that there wasn't a person in the room with you while you did it.

you want to tell them - that's the whole thing. i didn't know how to be alone in the room. i didn't know how to handle the silence. every moment was so sharp, and i kept choosing the wrong way to close the door. i have spent my entire life in the empty well, living in the ricochet of someone else's cruelty. for once i have built myself a ladder. for once everything i taste is all mine, every bite of sunshine and laughter. i have learned how to sleep out in the open with my memories. recently, they have started to purr.

your father rolls his eyes. listen. this isn't about you. i just want a grandchild in my future.

#writeblr #i actually didn't want a girlfriend before nat #and my dad recently said to me - raquel. i don't approve of the promiscuity #1. i am 30. #2. i had casually dated about 4 people over 18 months. #3. i do believe he was just mad that i get more girls than he ever did #i had to look this 60 yr old deacon in the eye and say. okay so i have a girlfriend first of all im just not tellin yall about her #and secondly. #OKAY???? OLD MAN I DONT EVEN LIVE HERE WHAT ARE U GONNA DO ABOUT IT #briefly considered asking nat if i could pretend we were a one night stand kind of a thing