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hxzbinwrites · 4 months

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Idk if you do headcanons or one shots but either or will be fine:

Can I pretty please get a Vox x Emotionless! Reader?

Plot can be whatever you want but just to (hopefully) give some ideas… maybe Vox had no interest in Reader but then uh oh she smiled! Now Vox has a crush (°▽°)

But yeah lol thank you!! Have a good day!

Vox x Emotionless! Reader | Lovestruck Fool |

Warnings ⚠️: Cussing, Vox is a horrible boss

10:00am

(Y/n) walked into Vox’s office, holding an folder with today’s date and Vox’s name on it.

“Mr. Vox.” She said, her dead eyes watching her boss turn around in his excessively large chair.

“Hm, what is it (Y/n)?” He said, giving her a single glance before turning back to his monitors

“You have three meetings today sir. 1:00pm with Velvette in her portion of the tower. 2:30pm with Valentino in the main conference room, and someone scheduled a 4:00 with you, a Mr. Alastor? Called in today for an urgent meeting.”

Vox slammed his hands down on the desk, his face glitching in seething anger. “THAT PRICK!! CALL BACK AND TELL HIM I WILL NOT BE ATTENDING ANY SORT OF MEETING WITH HIM!!”

“He called from a public telephone sir, I can’t trace the caller ID.” (Y/n) said, clearly unfazed by his temper tantrum.

“DAMN IT!” He said, punching a smaller monitor on his right,”DONT YOU EVER LET HIM SCHEDULE ANOTHER MEETING WITH ME OR VOXTECH EVER AGAIN!!!”

Vox turned around, pointing one of his clawed fingers in your deadpanned face.

“Okay sir, is that all?”

“UGH!!” He said, clenching his fists to his side,”WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?? IM AN OVERLORD, I AM THE VOX, YOU SHOULD BE QUIVERING IN FEAR!! IM YELLING MY HEAD OFF AT YOU AND YOU CANT EVEN FORM AN EXPRESSION?? ARE YOU BRAINDEAD??”

(Y/n) slowly blinks, before looking down and rummaging through the folder she still held. “Ah, I almost forgot. Mr. Alastor requested his meeting also in the main conference room. If you need another reminder about your meetings today just call me-“

She was cut off once more by Vox, screaming and yelling, throwing things hazardously across the room. “JUST LEAVE.”

“Alright sir.” (Y/n) said, immediately turning away and walking towards the door.

————

4:45pm

(Y/n) was at her desk, taking calls and rearranging Vox’s schedule for tomorrow when her work phone buzzed.

“Hello? This is (Y/n) with Voxtech. How may I-“

“(Y/n). My office. Now.”

“Sir? This isn’t your work phone number? How can I be sure that this is-“

“MY OFFICE. NOW.”

(Y/n) could hear his voice glitching over the phone before she hung up, and briskly made her way to the door of his office.

She walked in to his Vox in his obnoxiously large chair, his hands covering his screen as he sighed in exhaustion.

“Ah, sir. You called me?”

“Yes (Y/n). I have installed safety features into your desk. Don’t except meetings from Alastor. If he comes in here, press the button under your monitor. He is NEVER allowed in this building.”

“Okay sir.” She said, making a note of that on her smartwatch,”Will that be all?”

“Can you get me a coffee…?”

“Right away sir.”

————

5:00pm

“Here’s your coffee sir.” (Y/n) said, setting it in his outreached hand.

“Thank you (Y/n)” He said, taking a single sip before doing a spit take. On one of the monitors around the city, it showed Velvette and Alastor chatting to one another.

“WHAT?!?” Vox yelled, being as “careful” as he usually is, his coffee flies into the air before landing on his shirt. He hissed in pain at the hit liquid, scrambling around before tripping on the various wires around his monitor setup (that was replaced after his previous temper tantrum) and landing on his ass.

Vox looked up in shock to see (Y/n) covering half of her mouth, revealing a smile. Tears brimmed her eyes as she tried to respectfully hold in her laughter.

Vox’s face felt red hot. Out of embarrassment and admiration. Why didn’t she smile more? Oh that smile, if she could remove her hand it would reveal its full glory. Let him soak it in. Her eyes filled with life and laughter. Has she always been this….beautiful? Yes, I think she has. She has indeed.

She let out a little snort before regaining her composure, before crouching down in front of him, taking the napkins provided with the coffee, and starting to wipe off as much of the liquid as possible. He felt her delicate hands rub across his chest. He hope she didn’t feel his erratic heartbeat.

He wanted this. He’s yearned for this and he didn’t even know it. Vox’s breathing became as erratic as his heartbeat, almost in sync. He felt sweat starting to drip, wether it be from the hot coffee adorning his now ruined shirt or from the stunning woman and her hands on his chest.

Trying to get as much as she could, (Y/n) scooted even closer, not realizing her hips were hovering right over his. Vox’s mind was running wild, his screen glitching and flicking between different error signals. His hands floating near the handles of her hips. Taking a gulp, he almost put his hands on her skin. Almost. He ended up just leaving his hands there, leaving a ghostly stabilization to the assistant who was cleaning him up like a toddler who spilt his apple juice.

(Y/n) looked up at Vox’s eyes, their eyes locking onto one another. A small smile could be faintly seen across her lips before it went back to its neutral state.

She helped him to his feet, her soft hands gently pulling on his clawed ones, slowly helping him to his feet. Handing him the remaining napkins. “I’ll schedule a trip to the dry cleaners. Does 3:45 tomorrow work well for you?”

Vox sat back down, his eyes wide in shock from what just happened. “Yeah, sure, whatever. I don’t care.”

“Alright sir, I’ll get that done, and then I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Okay…”

(Y/n) walked out, the door closing behind her. Leaving the room back in it’s inky black darkness, with the exception of the glowing monitors.

Vox looked at his reflection in the main monitor. He could see his goofy smile. His blush adorning his cheeks. His eyes lighting up like a child who knows no sin. He looked like what he was, a lovestruck fool. A lovestruck fool for his assistant.

————

Word Count: 1006

(sorry it’s so short, i’m trying to get as many requests done as i can 😭)

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luxthestrange · 6 days

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BNHA Incorrect quotes#25 Feral-

What No one could have predicted was...You be kidnapped by the LoV...seeing as you denied working with Overhaul they thought...you be with them...they...they...They were so wrong-

Villain!Y/n*In one of Mr. Compress's marvels...yet still able...somehow to speak to the villains*-SPINELESS LITTLE PARASITES WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE IM GONNA WRITE MY FUDGING MERMOIRS IN YOUR MOTHERS BLOOD!?

Mr.Compress*Looking shock at the marbel that is actively shacking in his palm* K-kurogiri -KUROGIRI!WHAT DO WE DO? I CAN ALREADY FEEL THE MARBLE BREAK INSIDE-

Kurogiri*Slowly backing away and making a portal* Alright alright-Everything is gonna be fine I have a plan...

Mr.Compress: O-o-okay it on me...

Kurogiri:...Im gonna go-

Mr.Compress: I HATE THIS PLAN!?!?-

Kurogiri: No no it's fine, Let me just go get the boss-He'll know what to do with...all of...this

Villain!Y/n*Feral growling intensifies*RAWRARA-I WAS SUPPOSE TO MEET MY BOYFRIENDS KIDS TODAY-RAWWWWW!?!

Mr.Compress: NO KUROGIRI NO-DONT YOU DARE LEAVE ME WITH THEM!?

Kurogiri*Already out and made it through his portal* YOU GOT THIS!

Mr.Compress*Watches in horror as the portal disappears and when he looks back...the marble is no more*...

Villain!Y/n*Behind him, puts hand on his shoulder*Heeey Atsuuuro~

Mr.Compress*Tears up and whines,shaking in fear*...

Part 5 of:

The kids...Kirishima and Tamaki-

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dreamsy990 · 7 months

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(video essayist voice) kingdom hearts is-

so, kh1. its been. a little while since i played. so forgive me if the game isnt exactly fresh in my mind. theres maybe gonna be errors so please bear with me im trying my best.

this is probably the kh game i have the least thoughts on, which feels weird considering its the first game in the series, but i just dont have a lot of strong opinions on it. its a pretty solid game!

starting where i normally do, the gameplay is probably the worst aspect of the game. they really thought platforming would be a fun thing in this game, but its just. not. the physics are so bad oh my god. if i ever have to jump in kh1 again itll be too soon. the difficulty is also a little bit all over the place. i played on standard (like i do with pretty much every game) and i would randomly jump from breezing through the game to trying a hundred times to fight one boss. most of the time its not the fun kind of difficult, just frustrating. the only time i can remember the difficulty being fun is the last riku fight in hollow bastion. i wish more of the game was the fun kind of hard. strangely enough, i know a lot of people struggled with the riku race and fight in the tutorial, but honestly those were easy for me? i got the fight first try, and the race second. idk, get on my level nerds i guess?

the worlds here are hit or miss. some of them (mostly the original ones, hollow bastion and traverse town specifically) are just amazing and i love them. others are. uh. lets say getting rid of the tarzan world was the best thing to come out of copyright law. also, this game is the only one where i skipped an entire world (sorry atlantica, you fucking suck). so theres that. the disney worlds are probably my least favorite aspect of the game

the story is alright! i dont have much to say about it other than i think that its mostly pretty good when i know whats going on, although both me AND one of my friends were so confused at the ending that we had to go call someone else to ask what the fuck happened and honestly i still dont really know? what the fuck is a kingdom hearts you ask? the world may never know.

this game and 2 are the only ones where maleficent is good. i miss when she was like a fun villain. she was just super into the housing market and i love that. what the fuck is she even doing in ddd? getting into bitcoin????

rikus great, i dont think i need to say that. hes such a freak and i love him. soras pretty good, shoutout to haley joel osman for doing a great job for being uh. 12??? at the time???????? hes great. i know a lot of people really like ansem sod but i just dont get the appeal? he never did anything for me. like hes fine i just didnt care about him whatsoever and anyone who says hes a better villain than like. xemnas. is wrong.

0/10 where is axel. ok but seriously uhhhhhh i give it a 7.7/10. its a solid, enjoyable game! not my favorite, but thats not to say i dislike it at all.

#doodles #sora #kh1 #kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts 1 #kh review #spent too long on the drawing for this lmao

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tokuxsenshi · 9 months

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Sentai Body Swap Episodes rank

Okay so I finally done I watched all the body swap episodes. My favorite trope in all media so im an expert so this is the true ranking of them anyone else opinon is WRONG. (Also sorry so bad at words)

King-Ohger Episode 28. Shuffle kings

this THIS RIGHT HERE is a MASTER PIECE OF BODY SWAP EPISODES full team no voice swaps and FULL of chaos. I love everything about it. I love that Gira Jeremy Hymeno and Kaguragi learned a lesson and Yanma and Rita just want to kill eachother. 100/10 episode ART in its purist form.

2. GOGO V Episode 37. The Beauty is a Saima Beast!?

I'm honestly very surprised that I loved this episode as much as I do like I don't even remember it from watching Gogo I remember the season being very serious but honestly forgot how funny it could be. I love that this monster didnt even plan to do body swap and him going on the marriage interveiw and acting all weird but the fact he did that in Tsugumi body and the parents didnt react make me think shes just like that normally. Tsugumi is such a girl boss as well true QUEEN. 10/10 episode

3. Magiranger Episode 39. Inverse Brother and Sister and Episode 40. The Gorgon's Garden

Honestly though this was gonna be my number 1 when I started this episode was one my favorites when I watched Magiranger (despite forgoring its a 2 parter) though RIP to Houka 15 man harem. And Kai sick burning his sister. this some great mid 2000s sentai. though it being a 2 parter kinda un imporant it could been done in one so the episode be counted as 1 and together their a 10/10

4. Gokaiger Episode 27. An Unusual Gokai Change.

This another one I forgor but its a great episode and choosing Doc an Luca for it was perfect. some great sentai body swap shannies in it with doc running around from guys who think want to attack luka and being scared to hurt her body pure boi. 10/10 love Gokai so much

5. Go-Onger Episode 12. Sosuke Banki!?

I just love Go on its one my favorite seasons and this episode some the best of how wacky this season is. even with a voice swap I actually genially love this episode. and the fact the monster couldnt even spend 10 mintunes with the team because their just to insane that they couldnt even tell that Sosuke was switched. only one bad thing its set before miu so for no miu I have to give it - 100 points so its a -90/10

6. Abaranger Episode 27. AbaRed is AbareBlue

Another favorite season and this episode is not a low point honestly love that most of it just Yukito trying to be a dad and failing like dont let this man take care of kids again. like I think the only thing that bring this episode down is the voice swap again. 10/10 episode

7. Lupat Episode 16.Because You're A Friend

Another BANGER. Choosing Touma to be the body swap for this as AMAZING dont think the comedy could been better with anyone else. and the fact the Patoranger saw the monster in Touma body and basically though he some kind of play boy peek comedy. and the way they trick the monster to switch back really good. 10/10

8.Zenkaiger Episode 32. kai! Sakasama Gets Angry! Is That a Monkey?

I want to start with that the sub I watched the name the epiosde was freaky friday or is it monkey monday and like THAT WHAT IT SHOULD BE! this episode pretty alright I like Kaito running around Tojitendo Palace and completely failing at pretending to be stacy loud boy in quite boy body peek comedy. also love we get t see Flint do the Twokaizer dance even if its a body swap. 10/10 Episode

9. Dekaranger Episode 19. Fake Blue

Alright this where my real opinion shine. I LOVE Dekarangr its one my top 10 seasons BUT this episode where it was good... WAS SO BORING compared to what I was watching like I like the epiosde but for what I was making thi slist for its just not that good. 6/10

10. Toqger Episode. 21. The Runaway Bride

Another season I love but this episode so MEH. like honestly this did not have to have the boys body swap it just seemed really unessary and didnt really effect anything. The Gritta stuff was really sweet though I always felt bad for her in the show she deserved better. 5/10

11. Kyoryuger Episode 37. Revenge! The Ghost Deboth Army

Honestly this episode so boring I could barely pay attention like this one 100% did NOT need to be a body swap epiosode like did that even effect anything. 4/10

12. Fiveman Episode 36. Super Twin Strategy

I wont really reveiw this one like I did watch it and its alright but I've never seen Fiveman so I feel like maybe when I do eventually watch it i'll have an actual opinon ?/10

13. Kiramager Episode 19. Partner

I'll start with saying the Juru and Fire stuff this episode ADORABLE I love that... but I CAN NEVER purely enjoy this episode because MACH IN IT IS FUCKING DIGUSTING. like the fact whoever wrote this thogh that was comedy A SHAME makes sense the same guy who wrote episode 11 of Lupat the worse epiosde of ANY sentai I hate this episode it makes me so uncomfortable even thinkig about it. fuck mach. -1000000000000000000000000000/10

an now here at the end I'll talk about my FAVORITE swap episode and episode in general that I just couldnt rank with this since I dont 100% think it counts but I love it so we talking about it.

Shinkenger Episode 27, Switched Lives

I LOVE this episode its so funny and crazy. like taking the switch body trope but with furniture is so good. and the fact Genta turned into sushi and was almost eaten actually turned into an epiosde where he couldnt morph because he was to scared is so funny. and also Ryuunosuke the show punching bag of course gotta turn into little piss baby statue since thats what he is. this episode just great like honestly this one I feel like you can watch without even seeing the rest of shinkenger (Though why would you its the BEST SEASON) and the fact its a Chaiki and Kotaha episode just makes it even better. 10000000000000/10

#super sentai #kingohger #gogo v #magiranger #gokaiger #go onger #abaranger #lupinranger vs patranger #lupat #zenkaiger #dekaranger #toqger #kyoryuger #fiveman #kiramager #shinkenger

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hyperfixatedoncrimminalminds · 1 year

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Aaron Hotchner and Emily Prentiss x Daughter reader

Another request thank you fir commenting!

Summary: Would you do one where Hotch and Prentiss get a call from the police station because their 16 year old daughter or son (Reader) and got into a car accident because of drunk driving (Reader didn't get hurt)

Third person pov...

It was 9.30 pm, the team had finally caught the serial killer they had been chasing after for 5 days, he had killed 10 men and woman and 3 children, the case was draining for all the team.

As soon as they got on the plane they had fallen asleep apart from two people Aaron Hotchner and Emily Prentiss.

They were up talking about the case and their 16 year old daughter who was home alone, they hoped she wouldnt get into any trouble.

Of course they were wrong 5 minutes later Hotches phone goes off and he answers the call. "Hotchner" he says it was a police officer calling.

"hello am i speaking to Mr Aaron Hotchner?" he asks, Hotch looks at Emily and puts the phone on speaker so she could hear as well.

"yes that is me" speaks Hotch. A empty pit forms in his stomache did something happen to his daughter.

"i am officer Bing calling from Virginia Police station, i have your Daughter Y/N Hotchner here for underaged drinking and drunk driving, when will you be able to collect her and sign the necessary papers?" he asks, this made Emily snd Aarons eyes widened as they hear what happend.

Emily then chooses to speak, " Is our daughter okay?" she yelled into the phone, Hotch grabs her hand calming her down.

"yes she is okay, only a concussion and a couple of bruises the other driver was perfectly okay and is not planning to charge her" says the officer.

"okay thank you for telling us, we will be there to collect her in a couple of hours, we are currently come back from a case" explains Hotch before the call ends, Then two Parents sit in silcence.

"That's our daughter alright" Says Emily jokingly, but sees Hotches face and wipes her smile on her face, she could tell he wasn't happy.

"I can't believe her, we leave her for 5 days and this ends up happening" Hotches mutters angry as Emily quickly messages her daugter.

Emily: Your Dad is very pissed

Off with you Princess.

I kind if guessed that from his :Y/N

Voice on the phone, i dont need to

Be a profiler to know that Mum.

Emily: Dont get sassy with me

Not trying to sorry Mum :Y/N

Just hurry please, i dont want to

spend anymore time here in this cell.

Emily: We will be there in a couple

Of hours Honey.

Emily then put her phone away and laid down her head in Hotches lap and legs on the seat next to her, Hotch smiled at her he knew she had messaged Y/N.

Hotch watched as the plane flew in the sky, they still had an hour left until he could see his daughter and make sure she was okay.

Time skip...

When the plane landed the two quickly got everyone into the different SUVs ans began driving to the police station. "Where are we going Hotch?" Asks Reid from the back seat as his Boss speeds through town.

"Y/N is at the police station" he says simply, eyes on the road, knowone said anything for the rest of thw drive, when they both got tocthe station they ran in and up to the desk.

"Emily Prentiss and Aaron Hotchner for Y/N Hotchner our daughter" Yells Emily scaring the guy at the desk, he then lets them through and the parents run to Officer Nings desk where Y/N was sat.

Their 16 year old daughter had a bandage wrapped around her head, a couple of bruises on her face and arms bit other than that she was okay.

Emily breathes a sigh of relief as she pulls Her daughter in for a long hug the girl quickly hugs her mum back just as tightly.

Office Bing then takes Hotch aside and begins signing the papers for his daughter to be released, when he was done Emily had finally let go of Y/N.

It was now his turn to hug their daughter, the man does he brings her close to his chest and hugs her tightly. "You worried us so much when we heard you were in a car accident Princess" he said pulling away from her.

Y/N looked down, she could bear to see the disappointed look hisnher dad's eyes. "I'm Sorry Dad" she mumbled, the Agent then lifted her chin.

"I know you are, we were just worried, don't you ever do that again" he told her, this made tears fall down her face.

For the first time that night after the accident she cried in her Dads arms, only now realising how she could of died and how dangerous what she did.

Y/N cried and cried for hours in her Dads arms, Her Mum soon joining them in their hug fest. The family off three soon let go and the two bought their daughter outside to where the Team were waiting still confused.

It's wasn't until they saw Y/N that they realised she did something, JJ and Morgan were soon running over. "What happened arw you okay Honey?" Asked JJ

"Did you do something awesome kid?" Aksed Derek at the same time.

Both looked at each other before glaring. "Derek, she could of died" Exclaimed JJ

"Like you can talk JJ, you wanted to know as well but of course you have to be the mama bear" Exclaimed Derek the two continued to argue making Y/N laugh.

The 16 year old was happy to have her family surrounding her making her laugh like always. Their argument soon git everyone laughing even Grumpy Aaron Hotchner.

The end!

Hope you liked this oneshot, I had lots of fun writing it. As usual sorry for the grammar and Spelling mistakes.

Request are open!

Word count: 1023

#criminal minds #father daughter fluff #mother Daughter fluff #aaron hotchner x daughter!reader #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #emily prentiss x daughter reader #aaron hotchner x emily prentiss #Aaron Hotchner and Emily Prentiss daughter #fanfic #light angst

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ssahotchnerr · 2 years

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Katie Hi hi hi!! I hope this isn’t weird, but I saw that on some of your asks when talking about songs, a few Lana Del Rey songs were mentioned, and I was like 😏😏.

And now I can’t get the song Burning Desire out of my head 😫😫and thinking about having a crush on Aaron and it gets so bad that he’s the first and last thing in your mind each day. He’s in your dreams haunting you, and it has gotten to the point where only the fantasy of his hands holding your hips down as he rails you into the mattress, with his lips near your ear you can hear his breathy grunts with each thrust, can send you careening over the edge, each time with his name leaving your lips in the darkness of your room.

But it’s not enough because if dream him is this good, real Aaron dick down must be a transcendent experience so you start to wear work clothes that may be a tad too tight hoping to catch his attention. You also go out of your way to do little nice things for him like bring him coffee, or snacks and take the time to chat about not work things with him, because first, it brings that smile that lights up his face because YOU did something for him, and secondly yeah you’re thirsty asf for him but also he deserves some softness and kindness 🥺🥺❤

BUT ANYWAYS BACK TO THIRST THO(ugh)TS. when the team goes out for drinks or whatever, you start to wear things that are a little scandalous and the girls are like “ma’am who are you trying to seduce” and you’re like “no one” as you just stare at Aaron real hard like embarrassingly hard and you can hear giggles from the girls as they are like “sure”. And, and, and, you know it’s not appropriate and he probably doesn’t feel the same way because he’s the stern boss and would probably frown upon boss/subordinate relationships!!!

BUT SURPRISE YOU'RE WRONG BECAUSE HE HAS NOTICED HOW YOUR STARES LINGER ON HIM, THE SUBTLE FLIRTING, THE BRINGING HIM THINGS AND DONT FORGET THE TIGHTER CLOTHES. At first, he is like 🤔🤔? And making sure he isn’t reading into things because he definitely doesn’t want that HR nightmare for either one of you (he drinks that respect women juice). But after a while, as your little subtle gestures become less subtle and he can clearly tell what you’re up to he is like well as long as you're okay with it 😏😏??

So after one of the team outings, as everyone is leaving, Aaron lingers behind with you and just compliments how pretty and fitting your outfit looked tonight (and on the other nights) And you’re like :) :) :)? Because did you hear him wrong? And he can see the confusion on your face and he is like I mean it :) the outfit is very flattering and he places a hand on your forearm giving it a little squeeze along with giving you the look™. And in your head you’re like I’m about to bust because those hands that you have dreamed of are on you and your brain is filled with unholy thoughts, but outside your like 👉👈 thank you I’ve been trying some new things out and I’m glad it’s working it seems?

And he just smiles at you with that fucking dimpled smile and is like ‘it is working, and I would like to see more of it.’ And then he just squeezes your arm again softly, gives you a little wink, and leaves you with your mouth hanging open. Because number one, your dreams about this man are about to be top tier tonight but number two, you might get that desire that’s been burning you up quenched sooner than later :)

Alright, I’m done I’m sorry for my long ’i want Hotch to dick me down’ ted talk🥴🥴🥴. Time to go lay down and think thirsty thoughts.

minors dni

PLEASE AH okay so you've always been attracted and drawn to him, ever since the day you met him, but you never really surrendered to it. like, it made sense, he's a man of authority and incredibly handsome - having a little puppy love crush on him seems only natural. so again, you really didn't think too much of it nor act upon it.

but then it's game over once you start dreaming about him 😵‍💫

you literally just can't look at him the same way anymore. like after your first sexy dream about him hehe >:) you avoid eye contact with him the whole following day because you're so flustered and you know if you look at him, the only thing you'll be able to picture is him pounding into you <3 hehe you're in a briefing, looking at anything and everything that isn't him, he notices and asks you if you're okay. you have no other choice but to look at him, your mind immediately flashes with memories from your dreams and you're blushing profusely. you just nod, keeping your mouth shut because you have no idea what'll accidentally escape you if you do open it.

but the more dreams you have, that changes the game completely hehe >:) he's your last thought before you fall asleep, your dreams are consumed by him, and he's on your mind the second you wake up in the morning. he's actually all consuming. so you start wearing those tighter clothes, going out of your way to do lil things for him like bring him coffee or make conversation, just anything to be near him because every part of you just needs him; so much longing it's actually painful. like there's a pit of emptiness in you constantly when you're not around him.

and while you think you're kindaaa being subtle throughout, aaron notices the way you look at him. he notices your eyes checking him out and all the lingering stares- especially the ones on his hands or lips <333333 he's always been attracted to you as well, so at first he's convinced he's looking too much into it based on his own personal feelings. but then one day you can't help but compliment the way he looks in his suit, and as you do so, you also can't help but bite your lip ever so slightly <333 and then he's like oh ;). maybe now he can actually pursue this further because he's not alone in this ;)

omg and when you're out to drinks with the team - imagine other guys trying to hit on you (!!!!!!) and aaron is sitting there silently fuming. his own reaction surprises himself, like seeing you with someone who's not him? sure he was never fond of the idea, but actually witnessing it?? that's the last straw right there and it needs to stop. he should be the one making you touching you, making you smile and laugh, and it's driving him crazy that he's not the one getting your attention. like at work, it's clear where your attention is hehe and he's gotten so used to it, so that's the way it should always be. heheh you play along and flirt back with the others, solely to get a reaction out of him and it works. as if his eyes haven't been on you all night, he can't pull his stare away from you and he's not trying very hard to be subtle about it either. so as you're leaving the bar for the night, you can basically feel his front against your back. he's crowding so close to you and it gives every part of you butterflies, especially when he leans in and tell you how flattering your clothes look on you, he can't pull his eyes off of you or maybe he just flat out says you've been driving him crazy all night >:)

at first you're like ??? questioning if this real life or one of your dreams?? but THEN he gives you that dimpled smile, followed by that look, and repeats himself and places his hand on the small of your lower back and you're like YUP this is definitely not a dream it's too way real 😵‍💫😵‍💫 heheh and it doesn't take very long for allllll those dreams to come true <3 and you thought right!!!! the real thing puts all your dreams to shame; it's so much better than anything you could've possibly imagined

also- i literally just associate EVERY lana song with him it's impossible not to 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 and ughghg everything you said was just PERFECT ugh longing and sexual tension with aaron <333 YES PLEASE WHERE DO I SIGN UP

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner smut #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner fanfiction #aaron hotchner fluff #aaron hotchner imagines #criminal minds drabble #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds smut #criminal minds #hotch x reader

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jordie-gvf · 1 year

Text

home sweet home, josh

dad!josh fic!

shoutout to my wife @mywaykiszka for knowing what joshes favorite movie was cause i didn’t 🫣

warnings : fluff, josh being a cutie, mentions of depression, reader has a target obsession! let me know if ive missed any!

word count - 2.8k+

this can be read as a second part to boom babies, but can also be read on its own!

enjoy!

It was no secret that Sage was his fathers son. He loved music and he loved his toy piano. Gardenia was her mothers daughter. She loved makeup and all things girly. Josh had gone on tour and was very upset he couldn’t bring his whole family.

The 3 of you facetimed him every night. He always looked so sad whenever we had to hang up, either Sage and Gardenia were tired, or he had to go on stage. He often called to show you his rhinestones and his outfit. Every night before he went on stage, he called and told you three that he loved you and that he'd be home soon.

You were getting the kids to bed when your phone rang. Gardenia said, “I'll get it Mommy!” and ran to your phone. She answered it and Jake’s face appeared. You heard him gasp and say, “Hiii Sunshine! Can you hand the phone to your mom?” You heard the pitter patter of 3 year old feet and in came Gardenia. She handed the phone to you and you saw Jake. “Hey Y/N. We seriously need to talk about Josh.”

He noticed the color drain from your face and assured you, nothing was bad. You told him, “I'm putting your niece and nephew to sleep right now, give me one second!” He told you to do what you need to do.

After you read them a book and got them to sleep, you picked up the phone and called Jake back.

“Is he okay, what's wrong?” you asked.

He frowned and said, “He's really depressed. He misses you guys so much. I have to share a room with him, he thinks I don't hear him cry in the shower but I can. Is there a way you can come see him?”

You nodded and said, “I can try to take time off work. I'll have to let the daycare know. I'll let you know when we are coming.”

He smiled and said, “We all miss you, we miss our niece and nephew.”

You told him, “When's the next show?”

He said, “two days.”

“We’ll be there.”

You said bye to Jake and called your boss. You explained everything to him and he said to take as long as you needed to.

You went upstairs and showered, did skincare and went to bed. You had already talked to Josh and they would have been on stage already. You picked out Josh's favorite movie, 2001: A Space Odyssey.

You had fallen asleep halfway through and you were woken up by your alarm. You turned your lamp on and checked your phone, no messages.

You put your slippers on and made your way to their room. You walked in and saw them, both awake, playing with toys. Sage was playing with his piano, and Gardenia was on their shared iPad. Very much like his father, Sage disliked technology.

You told them it was time to go downstairs and eat breakfast. You grabbed the iPad and put it on the charger while they went downstairs. You asked them what they wanted and they said pancakes.

You gathered all the ingredients to make them some pancakes. You had an incoming phone call from Josh. You handed your phone to Sage and he answered.

You finished making their pancakes and plated them with some cut up bananas and strawberries.

You put their plates in front of them and handed them two glasses of milk. Josh noticed your hands come into frame and said. “Hey mama,” you smiled and grabbed the phone. “Hi hun, how'd you sleep?”

“Terribly, I'm not next to you.”

You sighed and said, “Yeah, it's not easy taking care of two of Josh Kiszka’s children by yourself”

He laughed and said, “I miss you guys so much. Do you know if you're coming to a show or not?”

You shook your head and said, “I dont know”

He sighed and let you get back to your morning. “Alright, well I love you guys. Miss you! Kisses” and hung up.

You had gotten them dressed first and then got yourself dressed. You had packed their lunches the night before, so all you had to do was get their water bottles ready. Contrary to Josh, you were never late, so you grabbed their backpacks and lunches and put them in the car while they put their shoes on.

They came out to the garage after saying goodbye to Lumpy, their fish, and got into the car. You buckled them in and got in the front seat.

You drove them to daycare and got out to take them in. When you checked them in, you explained everything to the receptionist and she got them put in as absent for the next few days.

You went home and cleaned the house, packed bags, and made arrangements with your sister to come over and feed the fish. You decided to get your nails done and run to Target. Little did you know, Josh had you pulled up on Life360. He called you while you were pulling into the parking lot.

“Why are you at Target?”

“Are you stalking me?”

“Yes. We don't need anything else from Target. Why aren't you at work?”

You felt your cheeks heat up and you had to come up with a lie, fast.

“Got the day off last minute, didn't feel good last night”

“What? What's wrong? What's happening? Are you pregnant?”

“Nothings wrong. Nothing's happening. No, I'm not pregnant.”

“Okay, what are you getting at Target? Can you get me a body wash?”

“What is this, 21 questions? Yes, I can get you body wash. I'm about to go in, so I'm gonna need to hang up Count Stalkula.”

He laughed and said, “Thank you for the body wash, Elisabeta.”

You smiled at his answer and told him you loved him. He said it back and left you to do your unnecessary Target shopping.

You stopped at the kids section first, getting Sage some shorts and Gardenia a few shirts. You saw a fluffy bear jacket and HAD to get them, you got two off the rack. You made your way to the stationary section, and got coloring books, colored pencils, markers, and crayons.

You saw the dangerous section, home goods. You traveled down the mug aisle and grabbed 4 cute mugs that you think the boys would like. You got Jake a guitar mug, Sammy a piano mug, Danny a golf mug, and Josh a Dad mug. You looked at the home decor they had and got a few new pillows. You found some cute throw blankets and put two in the cart for the kids beds.

You went to hygiene and got Josh his favorite patchouli body wash. You got yourself the new Native Gummy Bear body wash. You also got some kids curl shampoo and conditioner. You went over to the toy section and found some wooden toys. Sage had always thrown plastic ones and they didn't hold up as well as wood. You checked the time and saw it was nearly time for your nails.

You went to check out and paid for everything. You returned the cart and made your way out to the car.

You approached the nail salon and just went with simple pink. You finished up and paid and went to the daycare.

You picked up your little buggers and took them home. You planned on telling them tonight that they were going to visit their dad and uncles. By the time you got home, it was around 3:00pm. You unpacked their lunches and checked their folders for any homework.

You asked them if they wanted to watch a movie and they ran to the couch and put on Moana. You made them some popcorn and got them juice boxes.

When the movie finished, it was dinner time. You made chicken alfredo with roasted squash. You cut up their vegetables and got them some baby forks. Gardenia looked at you and said, “Mama, this is really good.” You smiled and thanked her.

After dinner had finished, you told them to put their listening ears on. “Listen, tomorrow you guys aren't going to school, because we are going to see Daddy!” Sage shot up in his chair and said ‘Really Mama?! Were going to see him? And Uncle Jake and Uncle Sam, and Uncle Danny?” You nodded as they both came over to you and hugged you. You told them you had already packed their bags and that they would be leaving in the morning. You weren't very far from the show, so you were going to drive.

You cleaned up from dinner while they did their homework at the kitchen table, telling them if they needed help, that they could ask you.

Sage came over and asked, “Mama, can you help me with this?” You shut off the sink and nodded. You went over to the kitchen table and sat down next to him. He looked at you and said, “I can't figure this problem out.” You held up ten fingers and told him, “Put down three fingers for me.” He pressed them down and you told him to count how many were left. He wrote down a seven on his paper. You asked them if they needed any more help and Gardenia asked you to check her paper. You checked it and told her they were all correct.

Sage sighed and tapped you, “Mama, is this right?” You shook your head no and he put his head down. “How come I'm not as smart as Gardenia?” You gasped slightly and said, “It's alright, you're still learning.” He looked at you and said, “No, we are learning the same thing and she's better at it than I am.” You grabbed his hands and said, “Listen Sage, no one is perfect at everything. You will get there Sage, okay?” He nodded and you sat there and helped him.

Once he had finished, you checked it and told him they were all right. He smiled and hugged you. You got them two bowls of ice cream with cherries on top.

You told them after ice cream that it was bathtime. When they finished, you put the bowls into the dishwasher and told them to go pick out their clothes.

When you got upstairs, you heard them talking about how excited they were to see their dad. You went into their bathroom and got the water ready and pulled out the bath toys.

When they had finished up, you got them in their pajamas and brushed out their hair and read them a book. Once they had fallen asleep, you walked into your room and packed your own bag.

After you packed, you went to your vanity and took off your makeup. You changed into pajamas and went to bed.

Sadly, you had to wake up at 6:00am this morning to make sure you had everything you needed. You grabbed all the bags and packed the car.

You went back inside and made a pot of coffee. You heard footsteps and down came Sage. “Hi mama,” he said and walked over to give you a morning hug. “Hi baby” You smiled and hugged him tight. He might be his fathers son, but he really is a mama's boy.

Once Gardenia had gotten downstairs, you had started breakfast. You made eggs, toast, and bacon.

You had finished cleaning up from breakfast as they both came down dressed and ready for the car ride. You packed the two blankets you got for them in the backseat of the car. You had already gotten dressed in the comfiest clothes. You packed snacks and water for the car ride. You told them it was time to get in the car.

.You already packed their car bag. It had extra clothes, the iPad, and handheld toys.

You got them strapped in and put their blankets on them. You got in the car and put your belt on. You told Jake you were on the way. You put the directions into the GPS and pulled out. You made your way to the highway and took I-40 E all the way to Charlotte.

You made a few stops on the way, letting Jake know where you were and that you were closer.

You checked into a different hotel for 1 night, considering you were going to be seeing him tomorrow during the day.

When you got to your hotel, you told Jake your room number and told him he could come to the room.

You heard a knock and you opened the door. You welcomed him with open arms. He ran over to Sage and Gardenia and scooped each of them in his arms. “Uncle Jakey!” They said, simultaneously at the same time. He rubbed both their backs and gave hugs. He put them down and hugged you.

“Thank you for coming. He misses you guys so much.” You smiled and said, “We miss him too. We cant wait to see him”

Jake had left to get ready for the show.

You got ready for the show, dressing in white and gold, the same colors of the jumpsuit he was wearing tonight. You got them dressed in 70s groove, equipped with some sunglasses.

When you got to the venue, you were in Jake's dressing room, waiting to surprise Josh on stage. Jake had told Josh that he wanted to hand out the roses tonight. Josh said yes, not knowing that it would be his children bringing them to him.

Danny and Sam had come in to see you three. Danny hugged you first as Sam gravitated to the twins.

Once everything was in order, it was time for them to go on stage. They hugged you and went off to stage.

“When do we get to see Daddy?” Gardenia had asked you.

You looked at her and told her, just a few more minutes.

Jake had a TV in his dressing room, so you put on Spongebob for them. You sat at his vanity as you asked Jenn for some rhinestones. She put rhinestones on your face, identical to his. Jenn got a call on her walkie, saying it was time.

You picked up the roses and handed them to Gardenia and Sage. You put headphones on them to protect their ears from the sound.

The three of you made your way to the stage. As you approached the entrance, Jake came over and grabbed their hands. He walked up on stage as you followed. You could see Josh, and you saw him fall to his knees. They ran to him, forgetting about the roses. He scooped them into his arms and embraced them tightly. You saw him wipe his face off and he made his way over to you. He grabbed your waist and put his hand on your back. “Mama,” he said, quiet enough for you to hear.

The audience went wild when you came out, feeling all the love in the world.

Josh picked up the roses and put Sage in his left arm and Gardenia in his right. He had them help him hand them out.

The show had ended and Josh grabbed your hand and led your mini family to his dressing room. Considering the show was late, by the time you guys got back to Josh's hotel room, your two beautiful babies were asleep on one of the beds. Jake offered to sleep in Sam and Danny’s room tonight, not wanting to disturb the Kiszka Family.

Josh had asked you to take off his rhinestones.

He sat on the bed with his back against the headboard. You sat on his lap with makeup wipes and tweezers. You plucked off each little rhinestone and put them into a cup. You grabbed the makeup wipes and wiped his face off from the glue.

He put his head on your chest and looked at his children. “God I missed you guys so much.” You smiled and kissed his head. You got off of him and put clothes in the bathroom for him. You made him tea while he showered. He got out and came into the room. You had taken off your rhinestones and got changed into your pajamas.

He sat on the bed and did grabby hands towards you. You stood between his legs and threaded your fingers through his hair. He moaned into your stomach and wrapped his arms around your waist and grabbed your butt. Gardenia moved around and Josh immediately took his head away to make sure she was alright.

He put his head back onto you and mumbled, “I missed you Mama.” You kissed his head and told him you missed him too.

He rested his chin on your stomach and looked up at you. You kissed his lips, grabbed his hands, and held them.

He looked at his babies then back at you and said, “home sweet home.”

#josh kiszka fluff #josh kiszka fic #josh kiszka x reader #josh gvf #greta van fluff #greta van fic

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rzyraffek · 2 years

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Fallout4 characters with trans s/o

Swf headcanons, he/him pronouns

(Also its more about their s/o coming out to them and proces of transision)

Preston: this boi will support the hell out of you, will give you cuddles and cute complements ^^ He would borrow you one of his coats if you dont have any nice masculine outfits, but if u still like wearning feminine stuff he still sees you as pretty as ever. If somone is mean to you he wont get physical but He will let them know that they are not welcame

Nick Valentine: he understands you the most, he met some asholes that probably misgendered him and acted rude Just becasue he looks a little diffrent. But he will ban you from using drugs and smoking due to him worring about ur mental and physical health

Hancock: this guy has queer radar, he knew before he met you. Will still call you sunshine and hun but those are genderneutral so its alright. If somone is mean to you they are banned from goodneighbor, and btw they are already probably dead. Also you need a good timing to came out to him because he may be too drugged to understand (not that its compliaced, more because he doesnt even know what language you are using atm)

Catsworth- he is speedruning pronoun change, like you come out and next second he uses he/him like good robo frend he is💖 he wont ask any quesions bcs he aready knowwws😎

MacCready: imagine this scenario. You-Robert im Transgender Robert:A transformer🥺🥺🥺 You need to explain what it is, i mean he knows the idea he just never met any transgender person. I headcanon him as bisexual so theres no diffrence for him, he still loves you as much as before😊(bonus points if you have more platonic relationship with him and he will act like dad trying to teach his son some typical men-like activities for exampl how to chop Wood, how to fix a radio ect(even if you already know this stuff))

Paladyn Danse: this boi will be soo supportive^^ And super defensive if somone is mean, he wont do anything but He will intimidate them😎idk and idc what B.O.S thinks about le transgender people. Bcs Danse is in his rebel phase he doenst care either😈

Piper:our supportvite queen will go to library and try to find some books about trans people Just to impress you. If she cant find and good stuff she will Just go ask u stuff :) will bully anyone mean to u

Gage:He does not care, dont get me wrong, as long as you do your job he will respect you and think ur the coolest baddas ever. Of course He respect ur pronouns and If anyone misgender you, he will commit crimes (or snich to their boss if they are fellow raider) (if u are on testosteron he will do a tutorial how to shave)

#fallout 4 companions #fallout 4 #paladin danse #fallout 4 hancock #fallout 4 piper #fallout 4 x reader #nick valentine #fallout 4 nick valentine #preston garvey #maccready #fallout 4 gage

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binkszamsstuff · 2 years

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Lion and the lamb

Warnings include: cussing, mention of sex, cheating, strip clubs, drinking,kissing mafia bucky being an butthole. Happy ending.

Mean!mafia bucky x sweet innocent fem reader

You walked through the dark club, women and men dancing on poles their bodies swaying with the sultry music as the purple light off the bulbs made them look mysterious. But that's not what you were here for. You were here to let him know he had fate in his hands.

You didnt belong here, no not in bit. Your light pink flowy dress that ended mid thigh and kitten heels was your version of going out clothes. At the back in the lounge there he sat with women and men flocking him left to right. His smirk was unnerving to you, he once made you feel light and while now he scared you. His choice scared you, he could laugh in your face but here you were.

You stood more to the side of him while he sat in the couch two ladies with long hair down to their bottoms sat next to him rubbing and kissing all over him. "U-um james?"

At that moment bucky barnes the notorious mafia boss almost flattered. You. It was you, once a upon a time you were his sweet girl, his love. But that was 2 years ago things had changed. The two of you happened fast, one night in a club like this he met you. Your friend had taken you out and when he saw your doe eyes look around the club of drunk and slutty people like it was a lions den he loved you.

James Buchanan barnes never thought of love. Never in his life he wanted marriage, kids a wife. But once he had you it all changed, he was head over heels for his little lamb. The two of you were together for three years and engaged, until one day james came home telling you to 'pack your shit and get the fuck out' you tried to ask him what was wrong and if you messed up somewhere. Tears streamed down your face, and you begged him to tell you.

"I dont want you anymore, your all dried up. I don't need you." Was all he said as he slammed the door in your face.

The girls on his side gave you a dirty look, "I'm sure you dont want me here but can we please talk?" You asked softly.

Bucky didnt think of you often. He never let himself dwell on what he had. The reason to why he shut you out was unknown to everyone except him. The men he worked with laughed and judged him for only having one woman, you.

His father even laughed and called him a pussy for trying to marry and be in love. He ignored it for a while until one night at Steve's birthday party at a strip club he made the worst mistake of his life. He cheated. The voices in his head made him to act. And the funny part is he didnt even plan on staying long only an hour or two and then come home to you. Kiss have some loving and soft sex that he treasured and go to bed all snuggled up with you. but of crouse once steve heard that the comments came rolling in.

So when he was driving home the anger pulsed through him. He couldn't believe he had cheated on the most perfect girl in the whole world. His lamb, his everything, his love so he blamed it on you. If you just hadn't gotten in his way he would never be here, if you hadn't made him love you he wouldn't look weak.

"You're right I dont want you here" he sneered at you.

"Please? Can we talk and after this I'll leave and we can put this away forever"

His eyes hung with saddness for a second until he was once stoic again. "Fine but hurry up I've got bitches to fuck" the girls beside him giggled. He is so cold now. You thought.

"C-can we go somewhere private maybe?" You asked nicely and again he scoffed.

"Listen I dont have time for your baby bullshit spit it out!" You flinched and nodded awkwardly ringing your fingers.

"Alright then, um so I'm engaged to this new guy and he's really sweet and all-"

"Why the fuck should i care!" He cut you off. In reality he did care and he felt the tugg on his heart that you wouldn't be his. Someone elses lamb.

"I'm telling you because even though you dont want me anymore I still really love you and I know if I dont tell you now before i marry him I'll regret it I love him too but it's just different. I know it's stupid but I thought maybe it was worth a try, I'm sorry for wasting your time."

You walked away from him crying, the girls beside him laughed the whole time you talked and he hated them now. It had been two years since the break up and you still loved him more then anything, you would do and give him anything he wanted. And if that meant not being with him you would do so but you also needed to move on in some way.

He watched you walk away wiping your tears. What did you do bucky, FUCK!? He thought to himself the one woman he ever loved just confused her love for him in front of rude ass people getting humiliated by him and them even after he broke your heart you still wanted him.

He got up "hey were are you going!?" The girls said "fuck off" he said before running after you.

When he got outside he he started to search frantically for you. "Y/n! Y/n baby come here!" He ran through the parking lot looking inbetween cars. Then he found you crying in your car, head resting on the wheel he now only noticed the big rock on your left ring finger.

Banging on the glass and accidentally scaring you. "Open the door!" He shouted so you could hear him through the glass you unlocked the door and not a second later he swung it open and bent pulling you into his arms.

"I'm so sorry y/n, I love you too I was such fucking fool to let you go. Lamb I'm so sorry please I'll do anything to get you back don't marry him." Bucky was now the one begging and one single tear fell from his eye. You caught it with your small finger whispering "dont cry" god your were so soft and sweet. He was rude and mean to you and yet here you are telling him not to cry while seconds ago you were sobbing because of him.

"I'm so sorry, y/n baby I love you"

"I love you too Jamie" he pulled you into a kiss that held every last drop of love in it.

And so the lion fell for the lamb....again.

#bucky barnes #bucky x female reader #marvel #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes oneshots #steve rogers #dark bucky x you #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky barnes au #mafia bucky #bucky angst #the winter soldier x reader #bucky barnes x female reader

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princesshillaryellaworld25 · 8 months

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How Gabriella met Pauline (Naughty GF x Purity GF love story/My AU)

Landlord: AND STAY OUT!!!I DONT WANT TO SEE YOU HERE AGAIN!!!!

Gabriella: OH COME ON Mr. Blake, I KNOW IM LATE ON RENT BUT PLEASE YOU HAVE TO GIVE ME MORE TIME!

Landlord: I have you so many chances to pay your rent and I gave the deadline and you still haven’t paid for it!

Gabriella: Look, I just need a little more time, I have my job to deal with and I’ll ask my boss to increase my-

Landlord: I don’t care, you haven’t paid me for the this weeks rent and the last other month’s rent

Gabriella: But it’s cold outside, please at least let me go inside and sleep and I’ll just leave first thing tomorrow morning

Landlord: No! That is the last straw, I want you to take your stuff and leave this place now or else I’m gonna call the police!

Gabriella: Alright Alright fine, I hated living here anyway. *gives the landlord the middle finger and leaves*

Gabriella left the place, she went to the park and try to find another place to live. It was dark out and plus it was cold.

Gabriella:(mind) Grrrr stupid landlord, who does he think he is, I told him I was gonna pay the rent soon, he didn’t have to throw me out of the apartment, now I have to find another place to stay.

Gabriella was pissed off that she had to get thrown out of the apartment by her landlord. She went to the apartment to search for a bench to sleep on when all of a sudden she saw a female angel with white horns and tail on the bench crying

Gabriella: (mind) Huh? Is that an Angel? She has white demon horns and her wings are gray and she’s crying?! I best go talk to her.

Gabriella approached to the bench where the crying angel was sitting.

Gabriella: Hey, are you okay?

???: H-Huh?

Gabriella: It looks like you’re crying, here *pulls out a handkerchief and gives it to the angel*

???: Oh *sniff* thank you….

Gabriella: Uh mind if I sit next to you?

???: I don’t mind at all

Gabriella sat on the bench next to the angel with a worried and concerned face.

Gabriella: Hey, are you okay Ms…uh…

???: Pauline.

Gabriella: Huh?

Pauline: My name is Pauline but some people call me Purity Girlfriend

Gabriella: Oh that’s a nice name, I’m Gabriella Hidden it’s nice to meet you!

Pauline gave Gabriella a warm smile. Gabriella blushed a little.

Gabriella: (mind) Woah, she’s really pretty, wait what am I saying, I just met her.

Pauline: Is there something wrong?

Gabriella: Huh? No no no it’s nothing, hey can I ask you a question?

Pauline: Sure go ahead.

Gabriella: What’s an Angel you doing in Parodies town, weren’t angels supposed to be in heaven?

Pauline: *looks on the ground with tears in her eyes* *sigh* Well the reason why I’m here is because My current boyfriend cheated on me with a succubus and have been verbally abusing me, and today he kicked me out of heaven for 1 hour so I had to come here.

Gabriella: Oh my god, I’m sorry that happened to you! That boyfriend of yours is completely jerk to you! But why would he hurt you like that?

Pauline: You see the white horns on my head and the tail? I’m cursed! I have been cursed by my father who did it by accident. I have been ridiculed by some demons and fallen angels because of this, I’m a monster!

Gabriella: I don’t think you’re a monster.

Pauline: Huh?

Gabriella: I don’t think you’re a monster. From what I see is a beautiful Angel was just misunderstood by some people in heaven

Pauline: B-But Purity Senpai said-

Gabriella: Fuck what he said, you’re are not a ugly monster, he is the ugly monster

Pauline: Wow! That’s the nicest thing you have said to me, thank you!

Gabriella: No problem, I always here to help and you know what else I think about you?

Pauline: No what is it?

Gabriella grabs Pauline’s hand and whispers in her ear:

Gabriella: I think I want to have intercourse with a beautiful Angel like you~

Pauline: 0_O

Gabriella chuckled

Pauline: AHHHH, WHY GABBY, YOU KNOW IM AN ANGEL AND WHAT YOU SAID TO ME WAS EXTREMELY INNPROPIRATE!!!!

Gabriella: Hehehehe Sorry Pauly, I was just teasing you!😊

Pauline: Hmph! Well it’s not funny plus having intercourse with a demon is a sin and I can get in a lot of trouble.

Gabriella: Oh come on, nobody has to know about it~

Pauline: What do you mean by that?

Gabriella stroached Pauline’s chin and gave Pauline a flirty grin.

#friday night funkin #fnf mod #fnf spongebob parodies #comics #fnf headcanons #fnf au #Naughty gf x Purity gf

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insomniacdreammerbb · 11 months

Text

Synopsis: a slow burn love story of my favorite chaotic mess of a man Dieter Brave and F!reader. 18+ eventually, minors dni

Trigger warnings: mentions of drugs, death, death by overdose, domestic abuse. Eventually smut.

Authors Note: I haven't written in years, but I have fallen down the rabbit hole of so many talented writers here on tumblr with Pedro Pascal character fanfics. I’m a sucker for a good slow burn, smutty, fluffy love story. Goal is to keep it around or under ten chapters. Any feedback would be appreciated! Also I’m new to tumblr and don’t really know how to use the platform so any advice on that would be nice too.

Chapter One

You cringe when your phone rang for the fourth time today. This is what it was like when Dieter had nothing to do. He’d constantly be blowing up your phone asking you where you put the sex toys that he’d ordered, what's next on his schedule for press or shoots or sometimes it’d be even something more ridiculous like if you believed that Octopuses were really aliens that landed on earth from a meteor. He’d be like this whenever he didn’t have someone to keep him company or in between projects.

“Yes boss?” You answered as you placed your iphone on speaker as you continued typing away at your MacBook finishing up Deiter’s reservation at a resort up in Canada for a project next year.

“What am I doing this weekend?” Dieter asks not bothering to greet you first, this was normal.

You clocked on the calendar on your MacBook, “You have a podcast with Stephen from Vanity Fair Saturday morning at eleven. Other than that your day is free.”

“Hey set me up a reservation for the Marriott in the Marina,” Dieter began barking, “and book two seats for the sunset cruise and dinner on the bay.”

You opened up google typing in the resort, you were used to Dieter giving you demands like this.

“Two seats?” You questioned him and you clicked book now, “who are you going with?”

“A friend,” Dieter replied sheepishly.

“A friend?” You repeated with a raised eyebrow, “Who is it? I’m gonna have to put her name on the second seat for the cruise so you’re gonna have to tell me anyways.”

Dieter was quiet for a moment, “Lola.”

“You gotta be kidding me,” You said, rolling your eyes, “her again?”

“What she’s hot,” Dieter responded, you could practically see her pouty puppy dog eyes he had as he spoke, “and her and her ex just broke up.”

“Again?”

“Yes, again,” Dieter said dramatically, “she’s on the rebound and slumming it and I’m loving it.”

You rolled your eyes again, “you know you don’t have to pick women who are slumming it just to get laid you know. There’s plenty of beautiful women all over L.A. who would happily spend an evening on a sunset cruise. Why do you need to pick the wicked witch of the L.A.?”

“See that’s where you’re wrong,” Dieter began to say, “Those women only wanna hang out with me because I’m a big time movie star. They dont really give a fuck about me.”

“And you think Lola does?” You pointed out.

“No not really,” Dieter said with a hint of sadness in his voice, “but honestly fuck it. I just wanna go out on the ocean, eat some good food and then eat some good pussy. Lola’s good for that.”

“Alright,” you said, conceding knowing that this was a time old argument the two of you have had many times. You knew that it wouldn’t go anywhere and you still had too much to do today to spend the time arguing.

“Do you want the all inclusive romantic suite with, jacuzzi bathtub with an ocean view or would you rather have the scintillating views of downtown LA with the wood burning fireplace?” You asked reading through the options of the luxury suites that were offered.

“Hm they both sound nice,” Dieter said mulling it over in his head, “where would you rather get eaten out? In front of the fireplace or on the edge of the jacuzzi tub?”

Neither, you thought to yourself. Your boyfriend that you’ve been dating for the last few months didn’t really like eating you out and wasn’t all that good at it.

“It’s the middle of June,” you pointed out, “it’s too hot for a fire. But then again knowing you and Lola you’ll be all over that room before the nights over.”

“I know,” Dieter said with a small growl of anticipation in his voice as he palmed himself through his sweats thinking about it, “Fuck it, give me the jacuzzi ocean room.”

“You got it boss,” you said, selecting the room.

The two of you sat in silence for a moment, the only sounds were the clicking of the keyboard on your MacBook and Dieter’s low breathing. Once you finished all the bookings you said, “I’m forwarding your reservation and the tickets to your email.”

“Thanks,” Dieter muses and then mechanically says, “what are you doing this weekend?”

“Matt’s taking me to that new Italian place 7th St,” you responded.

“Oh so Matty Cakes finally decided to step up his game and take you someplace nicer than Wok n’ Roll?” Dieter teased.

“Hey I love Wok n’ Roll,” you pushed back, “And not everyone can afford a sunset dinner cruise for dinner. Some of us are just regular people instead of big superstar actors.”

“Urgh thank God I’m not one of those,” Dieter responded.

You and Dieter had been friends for nearly ten years now. You met for the first time at your drug dealer's house, the two of you happened to be buying cocaine at the same time. Honestly you don’t even really remember the details the first time you met. You had come to LA to try to be a dancer while also attending UCLA. You had spent most of your early twenties shamelessly partying, doing drugs to keep your energy up to dance, working as a bartender, and going to school. You hadn’t declared a major in anything, you had a long list of ideas of what you wanted to do but couldn't decide on any one thing.

You and Dieter would spend a year running into each other before you two really became friends. You ran into each other at your dealer's house, at the bar where you worked and even a few parties. At the time Dieter had been a smaller actor, getting a few small parts as a supporting cast in a few movies and a handful of appearances on Law and Order. You two would make small talk, giving life updates in between weeks or months of not seeing each other.

One thing was perfectly clear from the moment you met Dieter. He was absolutely handsome and he knew it and was a total slut. But despite that he never did hit on you. Albeit you had a different circle of friends and there was a never ending line of hot women that threw themselves at Dieter. He was also twelve years your senior which may have played a part in why he never hit on you.

Your life had come crashing down one night in October. When you had moved out to LA to attend school you already had a brother living out here. He had left your home town a few years back. He was the one that had convinced you to move out here and to apply for UCLA. Your brother was your best friend, you had been so mad when he announced that he was moving out to LA when you were still a teenager stuck at home.

Then everything went to shit. You had gotten a call from Cedar Sinai letting you know that Brandon had overdosed. You were beyond devastated and catatonic for months after that. You had stopped eating, gotten fired from the bar you worked at because you kept calling out and dropped out of classes because you couldn't keep up with the work anymore. You spent endless months in your tiny shitty apartment, only ever leaving for groceries. It was then and there that you had decided to quit. You flushed everything you had and never did any drugs since then.

Then about six months after Brandon’s death you were sitting at an Ihop at 3am. You needed to get out of your apartment after months of being a recluse and you only picked his Ihop because there was no one else in it. Then Dieter walked in alone and went to sit at the counter and ordered a coffee. You sat in the booth, minding your own business until Dieter saw you.

He exclaimed excitedly about how he hasn’t seen you in awhile. How he even went to the bar you worked at asking for you. Your drug dealer had told Dieter that it’d been months since he had seen you. You were surprised to hear this from the eccentric actor. However a few breaths in Dieter had picked up that something was wrong. He sat in the booth across from you, inquiring what happened.

The rest of the night was a bit of a blur. You had told him everything that had happened. He stared at you with those damn puppy dog eyes and listened diligently. He was deeply sympathetic and kind to you that night. You had told him about how you were about to get kicked out of your apartment because you were behind on the rent and out of money. How you had considered moving back home.

Dieter had talked you out of it. He ended up getting you a job as his personal assistant and let you live in his guest house that was off the main house up on the hill in Sherman Oaks. He paid you well, even set you up with his therapist that apparently made house calls. His therapist would come visit Dieter at the main house and then send him to the guest house for you. You always gushed to Dieter about how you couldn't afford to live in Sherman Oaks and a therapist who made house calls. But Dieter insisted, that was the thing about Dieter. If you could get into his inner circle he was loyal to the death. You weren’t exactly sure how you got there but you did.

As the years had dawned on you two had developed a deep friendship. He never once attempted to hit on you which you kind of appreciated. You appreciated Dieter as a friend far more than a lover. That was the curious irony of Dieter, he was loyal to a fault but also went through lovers and girlfriends like you went through your socks. Dieter was far too chaotic for your tastes. It was entertaining to sit on the side lines and watch him make a total ass of himself. He also landed a few dream roles over the years and became a superstar and you were thankful that you got to play a part of that. He really was a brilliant actor and a good friend when he wasn’t being a pain in the ass.

Hours later you were standing in front of the mirror near the front door, putting on the finishing touches to your make up. Matt had texted you saying he was a few minutes away. You grabbed your light blue denim coat and threw it over your black dress and made your way out the guest house. The main house was attached to a long paved driveway that was about thirty feet away from the guest house. A black SUV was parked near the door, a man in a suit was opening the back passenger door.

Lola stepped out wearing a short white skirt with a red tank top with a deep V neck, her bleach blond hair was styled in big curls and an ostentatious diamond necklace laid gently between her tits. She had her face hidden behind big sunglasses and didn’t even give you a second glance. Dieter quickly appeared at the front door making his way down the front steps.

“Damn baby,” He said eyeing her up and down quickly, “You looking fuckin’ amazing.”

“Thank’s hun,” she said, throwing her arms around him as he came down to her.

Dieter immediately placed his hand on her ass as he kissed her deeply. Afterward he looked up at you.

“Damn little black dress tonight?” Dieter said, looking you over while he kept his hand on her Lola’s ass, “Matty Cakes finally getting lucky tonight?”

“You better not call him that when he gets here,” you shot him a warning look, “You know he hates it.”

“I know that's why I keep calling him that,” Dieter smirked playfully, “it’s funny to see him get all pissed.”

You couldn’t tell but you were pretty sure that Lola was rolling her eyes behind her Armani sunglasses.

“So did Dieter tell you that he’s taking me on a sunset cruise tonight?” She chimed in, running her hands up and down Dieters chest while keeping her eyes on you.

“Nope sounds romantic,” you smirked while Deiter looked down at his pleather shoes sheepishly.

“He really is,” Lola said, glancing between him and you, “and then we’re staying at the Marriott near the marina. He really is the sweetest.”

This was something Lola had done from the beginning. You could tell she was the jealous type, she always made a bit of a scene of staking her claim in Dieter in front of you. Despite the fact that you and Dieter had repeatedly told her you two were just friends, Lola still liked to dangle Dieter in front of your face like a shiny toy. Dieter always seemed to tune out whenever she did, he didn’t care for the drama that Lola always seemed to start.

“So where’s Matt taking you tonight? That tacky Chinese place down by the beach?” Lola questioned while still hanging off Dieter.

“Um no we’re going to that new Italian place that just opened up,” You replied trying to be civil.

“Oh I’ve been there so many times already,” Lola purred as if she were bored with the conversation, “word of advice if you wanna fit into that dress of your come summer order a salad. Their pasta dishes are huge.”

“Thanks Lola,” you nodded sarcastically, you were used to her many backhanded compliments.

“Alright well I’m bored,” Dieter said turning back in, “let’s go baby, I wanna go get on the boat already.”

He turned her around and slapped her ass as the two of them climbed into the SUV. As they were pulling out of the driveway Matt’s car drove up and pulled to a stop near you. You went to go get in until he turned the car off and got out.

”Hey, you ready to go?” You asked curiously as he got out.

“Actually we need to talk,” he said as he placed his arms on the hood of the car.

You felt your stomach flip at his words but also wasn’t surprised. In fact you were surprised by the fact that you weren’t surprised by what he was saying, “Okay.”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair, “I don’t think this is working out for me.”

“Okay,” you said glumly, “why?”

“I just can’t stop thinking about what you had said last time you were over at my apartment when we were watching that movie,” he went on to explain.

“What I said when?” You said trying to rack your brain that night.

“What you said after I finally got you to go down on me,” Matt stated, “about how you used to have a reputation for giving the best blowjobs at UCLA.”

“It was a joke Matt,” you replied with feeling your anger build, “I told you the actual story behind it. It was a stupid rumor that went around my dorm building but everyone knew the truth, they were saying that about me ironically.”

The truth was that you had been blowing this guy you were seeing but you were so drunk that you had ended up puking mid job. It was definitely not funny at the time and embarrassing as hell but over the years you’ve learned to not take life too seriously and it was a little funny now looking back on it. You were young and dumb and luckily made it through those days relatively in one piece.

“Really? Because Travis has been asking me a lot of questions about you lately,” Matt continued on, “he asked me if your reputation still holds up and if I’d be willing to share you with him.”

“What?” You asked shocked, “what the fuck, why would he ask you that?”

“Have you been flirting with him?” Matt questioned.

“No,” you shot back, “he DM’d that one night at like 3 am and sent me a dick pic which I told you about by the way and I blocked him after that.”

“Well now I’ve been hearing from all my friends that they all wanna bone you and I don’t like it,” Matt ranted on, “and now they all know about your UCLA dorm reputation of being a slut and now they wont stop asking me about it.”

“How did they hear that story?” You asked, crossing your arms.

“Huh?”

“How’d they hear that story?” You repeat yourself, “I only told you that story because you’re the one who brought up embarrassing stories after telling me yours. Did you tell them?”

“Look it doesn’t matter how they know,” Matt redirected, “the point is that I don’t want a hoe for a girlfriend and no one’s that good at giving head unless there’s some truth to it.”

“Oh so that’s what this is about?” You asked amused, “so you liked the head I gave you?”

“Well not anymore because now I’m just wondering how many other guys' dicks you’ve had in your mouth and now I’m just grossed out,” Matt said, throwing his hands up, “and I don’t need to hear it from my friends or whatever other dudes you’ve had.”

You stood there in a stunned silence as he got back into his car and drove out the driveway to the gate. Did you just get dumped for being too good at giving head? There’s no way. You didn’t believe that was the real reason, sure you may be alright at it but you didn’t think that you were extraordinarily talented at it or anything. But you could tell from the beginning that Matt’s friends were all douchebags and Matt kind of was too. You wanted to give him a fair chance but you weren’t very attached to him, you didn't even really care that you had just gotten dumped you were just surprised that you were.

Well fuck it, you thought to your self. You had been looking forward to going to that Italian restaurant. Even if it meant going alone and eating a whole damn bowl of pasta by yourself, you’d find a way to have a good evening.

*******************************************************************************

You sipped the red wine from your glass slowly, scrolling on instagram mindlessly. You had blocked Matt and all his douchebag friends. An empty bowl of Alfredo mushroom pasta laid next to you. It had been delicious and well worth the trip. The restaurant was definitely one of sophistication and romance. You had tried to ignore all the couples or families that were out together. You ended up not being able to get a table without having to wait forty five minutes so you opted for the bar. It did you better anyways because then you could have your back to everyone around you and try to ignore the sting of being out alone on a Friday night.

Then out of nowhere a familiar voice came from behind you, “this seat taken?”

Before you even had a chance to respond Dieter slid into the chair next to you. He had his sunglasses on and avoided your gaze, he was rubbing his temple in discomfort.

“What are you doing here?” You question him, “I thought you and Lola were gonna have a cunilingis party in your jacuzzi tub.”

“Yep we didn’t make it that far,” Dieter confessed and got the bartender's attention, “crown whiskey please, neat.”

The bartender nodded and turned to get a tumbler glass.

“Where’s Matty cakes?” Dieter asks, still avoiding your gaze.

It’s only now with Dieter sitting besides you being aloof that you thought to really look at him. The side of his face was a little pinker than normal and there was a small cut on his cheek. You went to grab for his sunglasses, taking them off delicately. His eyes snapped at you with anger while you sighed frustratedly.

“Did she hit you again?” You say hushed toned.

“Well it’s not like I didn’t deserve it,” Dieter replied taking the sunglasses back from you and sliding them up his face, “she was being a bitch, I was being a dick. You know the same old story.”

“You still shouldn’t be allowing her to hit you,” You say sternly, “it’s not right.”

“Eh fuck it,” Dieter said shrugging, “it was more of a bitch slap anyways. I’ve had worse, besides the girls a total psycho. She’s out there throwing a temper tantrum because her rich lawyer boyfriend won’t shell out the $135,000 she needs to go to New York for fashion week.”

“And let me guess, instead she asked you for the money?” You asked unsurprised, taking a sip of wine.

“I would have done it if she didn’t have such a stick up her ass,” Dieter went on to explain, “we were on the dinner cruise and a group of women came up to me and asked for a selfie. She sat at the table and pouted the rest of dinner and before we even got the Marriott she blew up on me because she thought I was eye fucking those women that wanted the picture.”

You weren’t surprised, Lola was incredibly jealous of every other woman that was in Dieter’s vicinity. She had even tried to convince Dieter to kick you out of the guest house even though you and Dieter had always had set a boundary early on of not entering each other’s spaces without notice.

“I don't understand why you put up with her,” you grumbled, “yea she’s hot but there’s plenty of hot women that would line up for you. She’s a selfish manipulative gold digger who’s going to throw a toddler-like tantrum every time she doesn’t get her way. You could do much better.”

“But she’s the one that keeps coming back,” Dieter explained, “and besides when she is in the middle of her temper tantrums the sex is crazy good. We were in the lobby of the Marriott, I tried to off to take her upstairs to make her legs shake all the way to New York, she asked me if I’d give her the money and I made a joke about how she’s like my own personal Vivian Ward and she slapped me and left.”

You rolled your eyes, it sounded like a typical fight between the two of them.

“So where’s Matty Cakes?” Dieter asked now just noticing, “Why you sitting at a bar alone?”

“We’re done,” you said bluntly.

“Good for you!” Dieter said, placing his hand on your shoulder affectionately, “I was hoping you’d wise up and leave his sorry ass.”

“Oh you mean just like how I tell you all the time to forget about Lola?” You pointed out.

“Yeah but you’re a lot smarter than me,” Dieter retorted, “besides you definitely could do better than that ass hat.”

“I’m not sure how true that is,” you responded, swirling the wine in your glass around, “he broke up with me.”

“Why?” Dieter asked, looking over towards you behind the shades.

“Well first off I don’t believe what he said,” you began to explain, “I think he’s full of shit but I don’t know why he’d lie about it. Probably just has a stick up his ass too like Lola.”

“We ought to hook the two of them up,” Dieter responded.

“Please Matt can't afford her,” you retorted simply.

“So what did he say?” Dieter questioned further.

“He said that he’s pissed because a couple of his friends are into me a guess and he told them the story about how I used to have that reputation for giving the best at giving head at UCLA,” you started to explain.

“From that time you ralphed all over that guy when you were drunk?” Dieter questioned, recalling one of the many late night talks you two had over the years, “What did you puke all over him when you were going down on him tonight?”

“No,” you said flatly.

“Hm too bad,” Dieter replied, “he deserves it. So he's pissed that his boys are into you? That’s stupid, if that were me I’d just make it clear to my friends that you're mine and show you off like you deserve instead of being a little bitch about it.”

“You’d think so,” you agreed, “but he said that he agrees with my reputation and doesn’t want a girlfriend that’s too good at giving head because obviously that means that I’m a hoe.”

“Wait so he actually broke up with you for being too good at giving head?” Dieter asked with a furrowed brow. A few people around the restaurant started giving you two funny looks, but you were used to getting stares from Dieter’s blunt openness even in public, “That’s the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever heard! If you’re that good at it he should be on his knees begging for your mouth every night.”

You shrugged, unsure how to respond. You didn’t really think you were that good at and also agreed that it was a stupid thing to get dumped over. But there wasn’t enough attachment to Matt. You were getting sleepy off the wine, you were ready to put this day to rest.

“Was he good at going down on you?” Dieter continued to question.

“Not really,” you confessed, “he didn’t really like to do it. Even when we were dating I tried to tell him if he wouldn’t do it to me that I wouldn’t do it to him but he bitched, moaned and complained if i wouldn’t.”

“Jesus,” Dieter said, running his hands through his hair, “Alright let’s go back to the Marriott.”

“Go back to your hotel with you?” You asked surprised.

“C’mon,” Dieter said, standing from the bar and tossing a fifty dollar bill on the counter, “let’s drown our sorrows in Mary Jane and we can play scrabble all night.”

#dieter bravo #pedro pascal #fanfiction #the bubble #pedro is daddy #pedro x reader

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poggersbathwater · 1 month

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Unpopular opinion but I hate the writing of Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss (more hazbin Hotel than anything but Helluva is also roped in because same universe).

(Random disclaimerrrr: Hey. These are my opinions. Also I am not a fan, i just watched the show out of curiosity)

1. The lore sucks. Like, in terms of world building, it sucks. Why do the exterminators exist??? And why would Adam be leading them? Wouldn't he be an archangel or just a regular angel? Maybe even a principality? The exterminators aren't actually a type of angel, bibically. You could've made the Powers do the extermination work, because those are actually a type of angel who also, happen to be warriors! That would've opened the possibility of the other choirs of angels. It also would have been really fun to worldbuild. Also, about the whole god thing, where is he?? Like, I know HH is in its first season, and God could totally just be an unseen force, but shouldn't God have been mentioned in this case? I get it, this is technically Viv's own world and its not going to be accurate, but if you're going to have Saint Peter, Adam, Lucifer, and the Seraphim, then why would God not be in it too? And, if you think about it, it would've been a good message if God was in the show and he had perhaps sided with Charlie, somewhat. Maybe not about redemption, but perhaps about adding rules and making it easier for people to enter Heaven. Because if Viv wanted to cover the idea of hypocritical and selfish christian ideologies (dont even get me started on how many themes are in this show my god), at least show people what Christianity actually is as comparison. It'd make the writing stronger. It feels like the removal of God is a precaution so Christians don't cause controversy. Like, it's trying to do what MONTERO did but it ultimately fails.

2. Charlie is worried about the wrong thing! She shouldn't be worried about the sinners not being redeemed, because technically, heaven is right. If angels can do whatever they want and be in heaven, then it's ALSO fair that sinners can do whatever they want but still be in hell. What she SHOULD be worried about is the fact that there's no rules that say what gets you where. And yes, that is heavens fault, because Hell gets more powerful the more people are in there, and establishing actual rules that tell you what gets you in there would BENEFIT THEM, but it's also just bad writing. (Speaking of which, in Helluva Boss, there is a mention of the rule to not say gods name in vain (episode 4) which I find very contradictory to the fact that there are "no rules".). Anyway, Isn't one of the biggest staples of religion to have some rules to follow for salvation? And I know that technically would work for the case that heaven is hypocritical, but it would've been stronger if heaven had actual rules that just weren't easy to follow (or perhaps had TOO MANY RULES) in order to show how self-righteous they are. She's focused on the wrong problem entirely.

3. Alright, let's get to the writing of female characters. Look, I know I've made a bad take on female characters before (my mutuals remember, and in my defense, my brain does not bake ideas all the way), but even the best chefs burn their food once in a while. Let this be my redemption arc. Viv does NOT know how to write female characters and she makes excuses for it. I can completely understand it in Helluva Boss's case, as it is more led by male characters, but when Fizzarolli, who is a side character, gets more screen time than MILLIE, who is supposed to be a main character, I think there's a problem. (That is not me saying Fizz doesn't deserve screen time- but millie doesn't even have a full episode dedicated just to her, and Fizz has at least one or two). It just- I dunno it bugs me. However, HB did announce some new things coming up and did make a short about Sally Mae and Millie, plus season two of HH is being worked on, so there is a chance for this opinion to age like milk. This is the one time I'd love to be proven wrong.

Anyway, this is in no way me trying to be hateful to Vivziepop (though she is such a shit person). I want to give her some benefit of the doubt because not only were there 10 writers working on the show (that is INCREDIBLY TOO MANY- the most you should need is four imo) but also creators practically lose all creative rights when their show gets handed to a company.

Anyway rant over

#hazbin hotel #helluva boss #rant post #yall behave or im turning off reblogs and comments #unpopular opinion #cw hazbin hotel #vivziepop criticism #vivzipop critical

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flesh-panopticon · 1 year

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Ultrakill WAIT OF THE WORLD update review

this review(?) WILL contain heavy spoilers for the new content, especially P-2.

alright, lets get all the other stuff outta the way on some rapid fire points.

S.R.S Cannon Rocket Launcher variant: sorry but i havent really used it so dont ask me.

Radiant Enemies and sandbox updates: i like the radiant enemy system, being able to modify speed, health, and damage without the hassle of mods is much appreciated. Although the boss health bar modifier is a bit broken on enemies with a name with multiple words it doesnt display the spacing. and sometimes the name is just wrong. like the FLESH PANOPTICON just displays as "fleshprison" (this doesnt happen with the boss version)

Dev museum: its a nice and relaxing place to just chill, learn about the beautiful people who worked on this game, its history (such as scrapped weapons and early enemy models) and just watch the nice scenery. also there are some fun secrets and a neat minigame

5-S: gone fishin'

And now, the main attraction...

P-2:

ok. so the pre boss fights are amazing. a massive gauntlet of some of the most powerful enemies in the game. Swordsmachines, Ferrymen, Mindflayers, and an invincible stalker sanding every enemy within a 500KM radius and there is nothing you can do to stop it!

Now the bosses.

FLESH PANOPTICON: it is very similar to flesh prison and has a good fight ost but it dies way, WAY too fast. (yes i know its kind of the point but still a disappointment.)

and now...

SISYPHUS PRIME

easily the most brutal boss in the game, he has a range of lightning fast and high damage attacks that are able to be parried but the sheer speed and already relatively small window makes it difficult even for more experienced players. his design (especially in the 2nd phase) is great, i like that his face is only defined with blood red markings. i love how he is built like a powerful weightlifter or sumo wrestler and his 6 meter (roughly 20 foot) height makes him very imposing and strong looking. his voice is amazing and almost EXACTLY what i thought we would sound like. Even his entrance is epic as hell, ripping open the Panopticon FROM THE INSIDE after V1 barely weakened it and then saying "this prison... to hold ME?" is almost scary and it made my heart rush like nothing else. the music... oh THE MUSIC IS SO FUCKING GOOD! Just like the fight itself, the theme is similar to ORDER exept faster, more powerful with loud and imposing drums and the melodies just personify how powerful and sadistic he is.

overall its the best fight in the ENTIRE game IMO and the update as a whole is one of the best ever. the update has been out for just over a day and the community is going insane. And some extremely talented people have already P-ranked it.

now what do you all think

#ultrakill #update #spoilers #boss fight #games #gaming #poll #review #wait of the world #sisyphus #panopticon #hakita #keygen church #music

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slashingdisneypasta · 1 year

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PLATONIC FAMILIAL!Toon Patrol x Smartass'Daughter!Reader || Oneshot [Part 4]

Title: Her First Friend

Notes:

The next chapter is my favourite!! It'll be in Wheezy's POV ^^

So my headcanon for 'Ritchie Rabbit', Roger and Jessica's kid in this, is that they adopted him ^^ Also, his colour is gonna be yellow but Roger and Jessica wont have colour 😅 Just the Toon Patrol and the kiddies. Sorry!

This chapter was really hard for me, so sorry for the long wait!! Stupid POV is soooo hard.

Plot: A baby girl is left on the Toon Patrol's front door step and now they take her for picnic days at the playground ^^

Warnings: The usual Toon Patrol shenanigans XD ...

Stupid Weasels POV

"Duh, yay! The playground! Hurry now Y/N, we gotta get to the swings before someone else beats us!" I exclaim when we pull into the parking lot, turning and holding out my hands to take her from her favourite spot in the world- Wheezy's lap.

... No seriously. Its definitely her favourite. SHE NEVER LEAVES.

I wake up in the morning, Y/N's having her breakfast in Wheezy's lap. I get up in the middle of the night cuz she's crying, Y/N's in Wheezy's lap and she's not crying anymore. We have a meal together, she's in Wheezy's lap. The sky starts to fall- she will be sitting in Wheezy's lap!!!

And- nooo. No, no. I'm not jealous. That's what Greasy says, but he's wrong!

"Alright, alright, fall out boys. We're here." The boss pulls the truck to a sudden stop, jolting us all, and hops out to swing the back doors open for us. Y/N giggles and clutches my head as I set her up on my shoulders and jump out- rushing for the swings and making her squeal up there. "OY!" The boss yells after us, a liiiiittle bit of terror in his voice. "REMEMBER DUMBO- YOU DROP HER YOU DIE!!"

Yeah, yeah- I know Boss! Duh!

Still, I slow down a bit though- and Psycho immediately zooms past us like the Tasmanian devil, and steals the very last swing. I halt in my tracks, then, and think maybe I could yank him off it??... "Psychooo!"

He gives an evil little laugh, and holds out his arms for Y/N. "You snooze you lose!~ Now c'mon Y/N!!~ Come to Psychoo~ "

... No. I dont wanna give her up. We were gonna go super high and- Oh, Y/N, you want to go to Psycho? Okay then!~ I happily hand her over to Psycho when he pats his lap and she wiggles around in my hold- reaching and grabbing for him. Then I bound around behind them and push them.

I got gentle, at first, as Psycho perks up and looks around like a meerkat for the boss. We spot him, past the slide at a picnic table setting up the food with Greasy - Wheezy's not allowed to help with food. He has to go sit at least 20 feet away, because the Boss thinks he packed 'cancer pie' or something, - and not paying attention to us at all. "... Now!" Psycho exclaims, which is the signal that I can push them harder.

"Okie Dokie!~ " I sing. "Hold on tightly to Y/N, Psycho~ " As he wraps his arms around Y/N and hunkers down over her so his chin rests on her head, I take the swing seat in both my hands and I lift them good and high.

Then I drop them, and when they come back to me I start pushing as hard as I can.

This what we have to do whenever we come to the playground, because if the Boss catches us putting Y/N in danger then he'll shoot us- or put our heads in a toilet- or kick us some place not nice. He would probably hate it if he found out we do this, but Psycho says what Smartass doesn't know wont hurt him~, so I guess its okay!

"- Oh hi, guys!! Can I have a go next??" I hear a familiar voice behind me, and turn my head as Psycho and Y/N slow down on the swing because I'm not pushing anymore- surprised at what I see. A... rabbit? A cute little rabbit, a little older then Y/N, and for some reason he's... kind of... familiar?? He doesn't look like anyone I know, I don't think, but the clothes... There is something about those clothes... little suspenders, and tow tie... hmm... huhh...

Could it be... "Roger?~" Psycho lets out a giggle, spying the rabbit himself behind a tree a next to the playground.

Before Psycho can hop off the swing and go over to Roger, the little rabbit speaks to us again. "My daddy says he knows you guys!" Yes, he does! "Except her," He points to Y/N, and she raises her little paw to waive- a cheerful little smile on her face. "Hi! I'm Ritchie! Who are you?" 'Ritchie' walks over (When- I don't understand- shouldn't he hop??) and gets on his tip toes to peak over Psychos lap, to her. Psycho doesn't seem to notice at all as I 'supervise', his freaky swirly eyes glued to Roger's form trembling behind the tree.

"Duh, her names Lottie." I tell the little, non-hopping rabbit after Y/N makes a strange noise that almost sounds a bit like her name but not quite. She tries again, though.

"Hhh... hi... R-Ri... chi." She grins, proud of herself as she leans over a little to give Ritchie a waive. "H- Hi, Ritchie!" Giving a giggle, she repeats it again- and again- while I look around in a panic for the boss. Where did he go?? He was at the table!- "Hi Ritchie!! Ritchie, hi!"

My eyes are bugging right out of my head and so are Psycho's, tearing his gaze away from Roger to look down at Y/N with a gasp. She spoke!! Where's the Boss!? Boss- BOSS!-

Psycho jumps out of his seat with her, going to dash for the boss if we can find him- when-

We turn around, and he's already there. Standing a few feet away from the swings standing really really still, his own eyes round like dinner plates as well! He looks shocked, the hat on his head causing a shade over his face from the sun and for a few moments neither Psycho or I know what to do at all... did he hear her??... or???

Then, he smiles. The Boss SMILES (Which he's been doing a lot more often since we got Y/N, but is still freaky to look at), and comes over to ruffle his daughters hair, making her laugh. "Good girl, doll."

... her first words were 'Hi Ritchie'. While Smartass and Y/N have their father-daughter moment, Psycho and I look at eachother and groan. Aww, I was hoping it would be 'Stupid', ha! Cuz its my name! Psycho wanted it to be- oh... why's the boss smiling like that? That's kind of creepy... the evil look is in his eyes now too... what-

He whips around and points at Greasy across the playground. "HEY YOU! ASSHOLE! YOU OWE ME FIFTY BUCKS!"

"... SHE SPOKE??" All of a sudden both Greasy, and Wheezy are with us too.

"WITHOUT ME?" Wheezy exclaims, picking her up out of Psycho's arms and holding her up by the armpits in front of him; A disappointed, tired look on his face. "... babygirl, we had a deal."

"And it wasn't SPANISH??" Greasy cuts in, crossing his arms next to Wheezy and looking super betrayed at Y/N... who crosses her arms back, and sticks out her tongue at them both. Psycho giggles at her and we all ignore the little rabbit boy still among us, grinning wide and all excited like he's apart of the family. "Una linda!! After all that work we put in!!- "

"Oy. Stop harassing my kid." The Boss plucks Y/N out of Wheezy's grasp and sets her on her bum, on the ground. Then flashes Greasy another smirk. "And don't be a sore loser- it doesn't suit you, green bean. Cough up the dough."

"Losing doesn't suit me, you cranky old bastardo- but," Greasy sighs, defeated as he reaches into his pocket. "Fine."

"That's right pal," While Smartass continues to rub it in as he counts his new money, Roger finally slips out from behind his tree, sneaks over to us, grabs little Roger by the arm and 'stage sneaks' away. Or tries to. The Boss catches him red-handed. "Ohhh... and look what we got here, boys... a bunny rabbit trynna sneak away undetected... "

Some of us chuckle- even though its not funny. Wheezy told me, though, that when the boss says something kinda spooky like that in that low voice- we gotta chuckle menacingly after. He says it intimidates people.

I don't know about that, but whatever~ Wheezy's smart, so I guess he must be right.

And it sure stops Roger in his tracks!

"Ohhhhhh h-h-heyyy, guys... long time no see... " He ducks his head low, not looking at any of us as he itches the back of his foot with the other one. We surround him, so he cant hop away.

Smartass talks first, he always does most of the talking. He's good at it! ^^ He does some more intimidation, by acting nice- Wheezy told me about this, too. He said it unnerves people. Is it because the Boss is so mean usually? I tried to ask him that, but he just called me nimrod... "Heh heh heh, well Roger... how's it been?"

"How's the wife, eh- Oof." Greasy tries to talk, but Smartass squeezes his snout causing a sound like deflated balloon to come out of Greasy's nose and it makes me laugh. Ha ha- do that again, boss!

"Oh, uh, f- f- fine... Wonderful, actually! Jessica is just best wife in the whole world- she's so nice, and bakes me carrot cake every single week! And now we have Ritchie!" Roger gives the little rabbit a pat on the head, giving a warm smile after closing his eyes so he cant see us anymore- he tenses up pretty quick though when he opens his eyes, again. What a wierdo. "H- H- howww about you guys?? How's y- y- your babysitting sssss- serivice going??"

Chuckling, the boss tilts his head to the side; All confused. "Baby sitting service?... "

"W-well, the kid, of course! Haha." Roger gestures to Y/N. Smartass looks slowly from his kid, to Roger. "If you're not babysitting her then why would you have he- " All of sudden Roger takes all the air at the playground, sucking it all in when he gasps. "Did you kidnap her?? OH- NO- YOU'RE KIDNA- "

Wheezy gets behind Roger and slaps his hand over the rabbits mouth- holding him down as he wiggles and tries to get away~

A few parents from around the playground look up at the scene, curiosity and concern on their faces, but Psycho just gives them a little waive and Greasy gives a wink- all good here! No need to worry. "Keep that screeching down!! What are- " Smartass whisper-yells. "What are you? You trynna get us all arrested!? We are at a kids park you numbscull! Jesus christ. We didnt kidnap her! She's my kid."

"Mhm, mhm- we did a blood test if you wanna see it!" I pipe up, nodding with a smile at Roger.

... For a moment nobody moves. Roger doesn't move, the Boss doesn't movie, and none of the rest of us do either. Its awkward, and I have an itch now, but I stay as still as a statue watching Roger.

Then suddenly he screams again, louder time even though the sound is still muffled by Wheezy's paw that probably smells gross. Smartass sighs, his eyes rolling up towards the big open sky while Greasy facepalms and Psycho giggles.

I itch my butt.

Nobody notices but me, but Y/N gets up onto her fat little legs, takes Ritchie's hand and toddles - yes, toddles. She learned to walk on her second birthday last week!! it was super exciting, - over to the sandpit with him...

#PLATONIC FAMILIAL!Toon Patrol x Smartass'Daughter!Reader #PLATONIC FAMILIAL!Toon Patrol x Smartass'Daughter!Reader Oneshot #Oneshot #Smartass Weasel #Greasy Weasel #Wheezy Weasel #Stupid Weasel #Psycho Weasel #Toon Patrol #Toon Patrol x Reader

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