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#dw i thought that too btw
harbingersecho · 4 months
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Marrassurma, God of Death (and Dreams) from The Abyssal
bonus Sol bc the hand kiss scene is cute
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eric-the-bmo · 8 months
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I may be a villain enthusiast but I will cheer when this man gets punched- who's ready to hear about Jeremiah? {Spoiler-Free}
Much like the events of Sept 16, it's a bit tricky to talk about J without delving into Spoilers- but! I've kept my mouth shut, and will only talk about what the other players know about.
[Note: please take all of this- especially his described personality- with a grain of salt; while I did create him as a character, he's also an NPC that is being further developed by the ST, and I don't mean to step on the ST's toes or hype up J's character too much with this post; I just like talking about him.] @mountainashfae
So.
Jeremiah is Leo's sire, and a very mysterious one at that.
Most of what we knows about his motives and past are speculation, though I have a bit more information than the rest of the players due to a vision Leo received in Episode Four. (Out-of-game, I let the other players know that the ep4 Vision sort of confirmed one of our theories: the one stating that Harrison, the coterie's current boss, is Leo's grand-sire. Since it's partially right, this means it's very likely that he and Jeremiah know each other.)
Jeremiah is charismatic, arrogant, and fond of being the center of attention as a form of control; Though he'd probably seem nice, actually, or at least until he realizes his tricks aren't working. He never quite apologizes over large mistakes and/or actions, often just leaving until it all blows over and acting like nothing happened; Maybe a gift to try and make things better, but never an apology.
It's been mentioned out-of-canon he fidgets a lot- not in a nervous way, just excess energy [like finger-tapping, for instance]. He also has a speaking quirk, adding "yeah?" to the end of his sentences, maybe to emphasize them or to make sure you're listening- who knows. ["Let's try that again, yeah?"]
Additional facts provided by the ST (albeit in a half-joking manner) is that he likes baseball and knows how to speak Spanish, but refused to let Leo know what any of it meant. There is also currently a running joke in the chronicle that Pauline, one of Leo's coterie members, is going to run him over with her car- or least attempt to hurt him, at the very least. It's been stated that the two of them probably wouldn't like each other, due to how similar they are.
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[I draw this guy a lot- I love his design, oops- but I don't have many images of him I'm fond of. This is the best one ^]
Of course, more about Jeremiah, like his spoiler-free backstory and current whereabouts, are underneath the Readmore:
Jeremiah seems to be an Anarch, having been heard calling other vampires licks, and doesn't seem fond of the Camarilla- Leo claims to have overheard him complaining about them before.
Jeremiah spent a lot of time in San Jose- though it's unconfirmed if he's originally from there- and the ST stated that he used to feed from people sleeping in alleyways until, and I quote, "he realized he was too good for that."
Being a Sandman predator like Leo, his current and preferred method of feeding is getting his targets intoxicated- probably almost to the point of passing out- before promising to take them home, only to feed off of them instead (Does he even send them home??).
This is absolutely made worse by the fact he's a bartender. This man does this to his own patrons. [The fact he even does this also implies that Jeremiah himself is a bit of an alcoholic, since vampires get the effects of the drugs their victims take, and I have many thoughts about this. What's up, man, why are you like this.]
Throughout the relationship(???) with Leo, he would occasionally leave for a few days or more- (whether it was for vampire-related reasons or not for all of the times he left are unknown, given his habit of just Leaving instead of apologizing)- and, of course, he manipulated Leo's memories. J has a handful of nicknames to refer to his childe by, with the most common one being doll. [However I am just now considering the implications of this in tandem with the Dominate discipline]
In Episode Three, Leo informs his sister that he broke up with J. It's unconfirmed if this is true.
Leo stated to the coterie that Jeremiah sent him away to San Jose, and didn't elaborate any further- one of the players speculates that J's decision here was a way to try and protect Leo, as Chicago is a Camarilla-run city; an unauthorized Embrace, especially one by an Anarch, surely wouldn't be welcome. Leo has attempted to defend his sire's actions.
While his childe is determined to stay silent about what happened on Sept 16 and the Time Gap that followed, it's possible Jeremiah might have some words about it.
Currently, he resides in Chicago; He seems to be kept busy dealing with the aftermath of Sept 16, as well as whatever else he's planning, and so far has not called Leo or anything of the sorts to check up on him. It's been implied out-of-game that he's connected to the Cobweb and might be keeping an eye on Leo through it, however this statement is unconfirmed in-canon.
It's established that Jeremiah will eventually make an appearance in Blood and Silicon, but none of us know when he's going to show up...
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widevibratobitch · 6 months
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my god. skinny people really just have like. No Idea huh just absolutely not a single clue lmao it's almost funny to watch fr but then id lie if i said i wouldn't fucking kill to be able to be that ignorant
#girl i am SO sorry people react with surprise when you say you're studying to be an opera singer because you're#*checks notes* skinny and attractive. so so sorry that must be literal hell for you huh how will you ever recover :((((#no no please keep talking about how equally bad that is to the brutal fucking fatshaming and ED glorifying#in the industry that me and the only other fat girl in the room were talking about before you interrupted us <3#anyway. we were talking about this one review of a quite famous professional music critic whose only comment about a fat mezzo in the cast#was 'miss xyz.... lose some weight'. not a single word about her singing/acting/whatever. but yeah no you're too sexy for an opera singer#and THAT is the real problem here girl i totally understand yeah <3 thoughts and prayers dearest.#earlier that same day this same girl was standing next to me in her bodycon dress and went#*pointing at her stomach that's so flat its almost concave* 'ughhhh what do i have to do to not look pregnant in this dress 😩😫'#and i said 'girl' and just looked at her and like the sudden horrified realisation on her face was lowkey hysterical#like omg you really did forget you're not talking to your other skinny friends with whom you can pat each other on the backs#and reassure each other that 'dw girl ur not fat at all ur so so sexy!' huh sjshsjshsjs#but yeah i dont like making people uncomfortable irl so i did reassure her she looks hot and pretty and skinny as all shit#let at least one of us have a nice evening and not feel Absolutely Fucking Disgusting ig <3#and the day before that after i saw our (last ever btw never photographing myself with them ever again <3) picture and had a mini break down#the other even skinnier and smaller and petite-er crouched down next to me with the most guilty fucking expression and quietly asked me#if im alright and do i want her to delete those pictures (that she posted on two separate social media pages) and like#the look of immense fucking pity on her was even worse than seeing those pictures#like i know she meant well and was trying to be nice but my god. this really is how you all see me huh#like looking like me would be fate worse than death for yall#not even gonna mention the thing i just learned this friday that the retired ballerina who leads our ballet classes said about me#trying to cheer up the other fat girl who happened to have a bit of an emotional breakdown in the middle of the class :)))))))#like i am sooooooo so glad and honoured to be an inspiration to you. really. always happy to help. the exemplary Fat Girl Who Fucking Sucks#But Doesnt Let It Bother Her <333333#like on one hand. yeah it really does make me wanna jump off a cliff. but on the other. its just hilarious sjdgsjsgsj#you sure are right miss ma'am. i sure don't let this bother me at all. i am famous for my uncanny ability to Not Be Bothered by all this <33#but shes new. its ok. how could she know about the last two years when i was getting panic attacks and sobbing myself to sleep every tuesday#but yeah no. [lauren cooper voice] am i bovvered? am i bovvered tho? i aint even bovvered!
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hacked-by-jake · 1 year
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Hbjj, how are you today? About your Eric theory that Alan mentions, which could be the same one we met in the new game, so we would be in a love triangle between a police officer and Jake, a hacker? (Assuming Eric can work for the police in other areas) I have to say, as long as we have Jake with us, it's always going to be him. But I found this possibility interesting between the legal side and the criminal side 👀👀
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Ohhh, that's a interesting thought! Well, if Eric works for the police, it doesn’t have to be, but it’s kind of probable, at least he has something to do with cops. At least with Alan. Tbh, my wish-thought is that Jake will also be part of the main story again because I would love to work with the police on the one hand and at the same time secretly get help from a hot - uh - wanted hacker. The differences are really interesting, and I hope Eric (or someone else) isn’t as interesting as Jake, I don’t want to betray Jake. 😩 But still, the special bond between Jake and MC.. I don't think it could become as special with someone else.
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stellacadente · 1 month
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hi Nico! I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this, I hope you’ll be okay and can take some time to yourself :( <3
thank youuu silver i really appreciate this!! i'll be okay, shit just isn't Fantastic rn been struggling w this and other stuff so like. it's not easy but i'll be fine i'm trying my best to take care of myself and find peace within myself which is the hardest place to find it but honestly i think the only one?? but yeah ly and i hope you're doing well 🩵
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sphylor · 8 months
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regressed ghouls are so so cute
they are indeed!! i feel like i gotta say tho that while i do focus on the cuteness and softer side of regression its definitely not all sunshine and rainbows and there are definitely some not cute moments that happen too. but they are still cute in the moments when they're happy and looked after and their needs are met!! the cutest little sweetie pies ever i love them so much
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astrxealis · 2 years
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i lost my moral compass ever since i started liking zenos
#/joke pls LMAO although i genuinely do like zenos's character#you see . idk but i love his character ... ig i can understand how it's like too ( not to the same extent ofc though dw )#i like tsuyu and fordola too :] i. i don't hate asahi bcs i LOVE his voice but also he's ... yeah .........#he's a funny guy . i can't hate him . but it'd be wrong to say i love him . and then fandaniel is one of my favs lmao <3#emet-selch is SUCH a good character ... you cannot fight me when i say he is literally the best antagonist#hmmmhmhmhmhm characters like belial beelzebub and lucilius greatly fascinate me :O i like them all too heh#my favorite characters i realize are a Bit morally ambiguous though ... dimitri akechi sandalphon g'raha#sandy and dima are more 'shit happened but in the end i'm getting better' i can't explain properly but that is . the gist#akechi ... if you know you know. and for g'raha >_< all of them i think are good people at heart#tho dimitri went thru that stuff! sandy w his purpose and all! sandy similar to raha but raha is moreso just. doing his duty for the best#possible outcome ( 'best' btw ) and will do what it takes to keep us alive and save the world from peril ( i love him sm )#akechi ... yeah just if you know. then you know. it's just pretty tragic#idk where i went with this i suddenly got Thoughts#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#i would say i definitely still have quite the strong moral compass ... it's complicated. not black and white#i think about that stuff a lot but at the very least the one truth is that i just generally want the world to be a better place eowjofnsod#+ justice !! yes :] okay i stop rambling now for this#tag later#what is my saved tag again
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cryptidapprentice · 4 months
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maaaannnnn
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I hate myself
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maplesyrupsainz · 5 months
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙i want what's in front of me | LH44˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: lewis hamilton x (vegan) chef y/n reader (she/her)
genre: social media au
warnings: slight sexual innuendo & just fluff plus mentions of veganism yey we love our vegan legends y/n & lewis
summary: in which the new mercedes team chef cooks her way into ne driver's heart
a/n: i said i wouldn't write for lewis coz he's too intimidating but my friend mentioned this plot idea & i was sold Sorry it's kind of short but yh just a cute lil idea i threw together :)
my masterlist
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by yourbff, lewishamilton, and 17,273 others
yourusername new job same mee #veganlyf
view all 1,023 comments
yourbff we get it y/n ur vegan
yourusername if u got it u would be too! 🐷
user1 omg the pasta!! recipe?
yourusername it will be in the cookbook dw!
user2 what's her job why is everyone on twitter talking about her
user3 she's the new team chef for mercedes f1 team ig
yourusername posted a story
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liked by lewishamilton, yourbff, and 12,924 others
lewishamilton recipe?
yourusername lol i will cook it for the team tomorrow 🍲
lewishamilton but im hungry right now
yourusername oh?
whatsapp ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by yourbff, friend1, and 8,293 others
yourbff something is happening here
yourusername yea, cooking
yourbff yup 😊
lewishamilton posted a story
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liked by yourusername, georgerussell63, and 683,183 others
georgerussell63 is that our team chef
lewishamilton maybe
georgerussell63 nice
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by lewishamilton, georgerussell63, and 27,238 others
yourusername summer ☀️
view all 2,182 comments
user8 she is so insanely gorgeous
yourbff come home now
yourusername busy
lewishamilton she's busy
yourbff ok sory sir 🙏
lewishamilton wow
user9 he's just like us fr
user10 i have a lot of questions
georgerussell63 posted a story
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liked by yourbff, yourusername, and 372,029 others
yourusername omg george
georgerussell63 sorry it was meant for my close friends
georgerussell63 too late now i suppose
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername posted a story
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liked by lewishamilton, yourbff, and 18,284 others
yourbff we've come so far
yourusername and you thought i was being delusional ! 🥰
lewishamilton
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liked by yourusername, mercedesamgf1, and 942,023 others
lewishamilton been a minute
tagged: yourusername
view all 9,923 comments
user14 ladies & gentlemen....her
liked by lewishamilton
yourusername taking pics of me for what
georgerussell63 his wank bank
lewishamilton delete that you cant say that
yourusername hahahahahaha
user15 omg
user16 george ships them harder than us lol
yourbff thts MY best friend btw
lewishamilton yes i know you keep reminding me
yourbff just making sure u know where u stand
yourusername posted a story
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liked by carmenmmundt, georgerussell63 and 11,283 others
georgerussell63 stealing my girl?
yourusername absolutely i am yes
yourusername she said im a better cook
twitter ->
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instagram ->
yourusername
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liked by yourbff, lewishamilton, and 32,293 others
yourusername my cookbook will be urs to purchase this winter ❄️!!! 100% vegan, cheap n easy meals to make from ur home, tried & tested by urs truly (and all of the mercedes f1 team!) i hope u enjoy it as much as i enjoyed putting it together🥹🫶
view all 4,843 comments
yourbff SO proud of u!!!
yourusername 🥹🥹🥹
mercedesamgf1 we will be purchasing! 😋
liked by yourusername
user20 not even vegan but i want to be able to cook like y/n & pull a sexy man like lewis 😝
lewishamilton so proud cant wait to see what you've created, you're a unique talent ❤️
yourusername thank u so much & for being my guinea pig 🫶
user21 perhaps i love them omg
lewishamilton
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liked by carmenmmundt, yourusername, and 984,293 others
lewishamilton the woman i love
tagged: yourusername
view all 8,293 comments
yourusername 🥹iloveyou
lewishamilton i won the lottery meeting you when i did
user22 my heart
yourbff if only i could go back in time nd tell y/n who she would be dating rn ..
liked by lewishamilton, yourusername, and georgerussell63
user23 idk if i should be more jealous of her or him
mercedesamgf1 we feel so honoured to have brought you both together!
THE END ❤️
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ellequarius · 3 months
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2 day routine 4 the void state 🌊
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Hey guys!
I thought i'd drop my exact void routine for anyone who was interested. This routine has never let me down and i have always entered the void state using it no matter how many doubts i had.
DISCLAIMER: you don't have to follow this routine this is just what I do. If you want to follow along no problem!
DAY ONE:
Affirm as soon as you wake up. 3x each:
"I always wake up in the void state."
"Entering the void state is so easy for me"
"Why do i always wake up in the void state"
"I am always aware when i am in the void state"
Now because I have school I can't really listen to subliminals in class so I just affirm throughout the day. For example If i have history, math, and computer science in the morning i would recite these affirmations each time i go to a different class.
AFTER SCHOOL:
Listen to these subliminals for like 20-30 minutes each: https://youtu.be/nLTtNKCz6rs?si=47tZgHN9opt0XHCL https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qrSZwAaUBWg https://youtu.be/oKU8YIicYQg?si=WnR8YpJABBg1osPh
Remember to affirm every few hours or each hour whichever one you prefer!!
BEFORE BED: (i don't do this one as often but i used this when i wanted to have a lucid dream and it still worked very well. This part also isn't necessary unless you have a lot of limiting beliefs)
Do psych-k for as long as you want, sometimes i did it for 10 minutes other times I did it for 2, it really doesn't matter.
DAY TWO:
Just a repeat of day one.
DAY 3: (the day you enter the void)
Just affirm every couple hours.
In my experience i always entered the void when i least expected it. The last time I entered the void state (last week Thursday) I actually thought I wasn't going to enter the void because It was already 5pm and I thought I would've already entered. Just know that you will enter the void on the third day. It's literally guaranteed. Try not to think "oh i'm never gonna be able to enter the void" too often. (Stay positive!) I know everyones journey is different and there are tons of diff methods out there that you can use, but this is just what I do.
BTW: i have so many asks to answer and if it seems like i'm taking awhile to answer dw i'll usually answer them in around a day or two if i haven't already answered them.
Hope this helps!
-elle 💋
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koolades-world · 2 months
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Hello!, Can I request the demon brothers + undatables reaction to an MC who's always patient snap to a classmate they wouldn't cooperate even though MC was asking? (BTW I love your works ^^)
hi!! of course!
enjoy <3
Mc who snaps at a classmate
Lucifer
he did not expect when you began to yell
however one he learnt the situation he decided it was deserved
after you yell at that demon, he does too after class
treats you to dinner that night as a way to help you relieve some stress
Mammon
will say it right to your face: that was hot
he never thought hearing the sweetest, most patient person he knows yelling at someone would do something for him
he secretly wants you to do it again
to his dismay and your relief, that demon cooperates every time after that
Levi
will not say it to your face but thinks: that was hot
he would never admit that, not even to his figurines
his heart almost stopped when he heard you yell and he wasn't even sure why at first
would listen to you yell again 100%
Satan
honestly he totally understood where you were coming from
he probably would've done it if you didn't
helps you calm down afterwards
dw that person will never give you trouble again
Asmo
honestly he was getting annoyed with them too
he congratulates you once you're done with them
because he's glad for you and proud of you
but next time just let him know they're bothering you and he'll do it for you <3
Beel
at first he has no clue why you're yelling or upset
you never yell and this might be the first time he has heard you do so
he tries to stop you initally but after he learns the situation he's on your side
there's nothing more annoying than someone who won't cooperate
Belphie
like lucifer, he decided it was well deserved
that demon's behavior was much more annoying than his tendency to sleep in class! haha
is on the sidelines cheering "fight" even if it's not escalating there
if it is he's recording it
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melonn-soda · 1 year
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Hi i saw ur reqs are open and i adore your writting so much!
i wanted to ask if you could write jealous diluc x sub male reader headcanons? a one shot is good too tho! again i love ur writting!!
❝JEALOUS DILUC w/ M!READER HCs...❞
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Order up~!
word count: n/a
warning(s) - he gets possessive
prompt - title is self explanatory
note - giggling and kicking my feet rn ur so sweet🤭 btw u didn’t specify whether or not you wanted it to be nsfw or sfw so i just wrote both for u
fem aligned dni
SFW Headcanons...
i’m gonna use kaeya for this bc i feel like he would do this just to pester his brother
so you’re at the angel’s share, right? diluc’s working the bar and everyone’s chatting each other up
kaeya would be talking to you dropping not so subtle suggestive remarks that you simply just brush off your shoulder
diluc would be glaring so hard at him bc he knows his brother is being an ass
if it was anybody else though…
you are in for a ride
you may take that wording sexually and metaphorically
he would stop everything he’s doing to try and pry the stranger off of you no matter how far he has to go
but since it was kaeya he didn’t really care that much💀
some things he would do would be interrupting your conversation, go up to you and kiss your cheek, arm around your waist, arm around your shoulder, any thing to show he has possession over you
he can’t let his cute boyfriend go and find someone else other than him
“diluc.. why are you acting like this?” you pouted while whispering, looking over your shoulder to gaze at his fiery red eyes, his arm around your waist as his hands squished at the soft flesh.
he didn’t bother to answer, brows furrowed angrily as he watched kaeya walk off with a smirk on his face, feeling proud that he managed to piss off his brother once again.
“diluc.” you called out again, tugging on his jet black coat with fancy gold embroidery. no answer once again, “diluc..!”
his eyes snapped to yours, almost flinching at his death stare. it was definitely directed at you because of the way he dug his nails into you, a yelp sprouting out from your mouth in surprise.
“keep trying this again and i’ll have to take matters into my own hands.” he growled, your face flushing at how deep his voice had gotten.
“yessir..”
NSFW Headcanons [cw: spanking, he gets pretty rough in this]
will drag you to the bedroom by the arm
however diluc ALWAYS asks for consent idc idc
he will edge you for what feels like hours as a punishment, using more toys on you than you have fingers on your hands
either that or he will bend you over his knees and spank you like the little brat you are
when you’ve finally learned your lesson, he’ll make you ride him being all sore and shit
he’s kinda a sadist but that’s just my thoughts ig🤷🏽
and when you can’t do any of that anymore then he’ll just fuck you dumb
multiple rounds
i’m not exaggerating when i say multiple 😭
like about 3-5 depending on how much he wants to claim you for his own
but dw he’s really good at aftercare and stuff like that
expect lots of snuggles and he’ll clean you bc he’s just respectful yk
however at the end of that he’ll say something like, “you belong to me no matter how many times i have to remind you.”
you moaned shamelessly as your insides where being absolutely destroyed by the man on top of you, his hips smacking against yours deliciously. diluc was angry. angry and very jealous.
how dare you go and just act like that man wasn’t just flirting with you? you were his, all his. nobody else’s. even if he had to carve it into your brain you both knew that you could never find someone better than the tavern owner himself.
“ngh! ah- diluc, can’t-!” you sputtered out, clawing at his back with blunt nails. he was going to fuck the thoughts out of you at this pace.
“shut up… you don’t get to make excuses after pulling something like that. you are mine.” his cock pressed repeatedly on your prostate, making you nearly scream as you cried into his shoulder, “i’m the one that can- ahn- you feel this good”
you groaned, feeling yourself getting closer to your release, “mmmngh! yes, i’m yours! don’t want anyone else but you!” you slurred out, tears blurring your vision of him.
im not the biggest diluc liker so i’m sorry if this seems like garbage (also i was just blasting viva happy while writing this)
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shuahaes · 8 months
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baking w/ the hip-hop unit!
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svt hhu x reader; established relationship; all fluff, sfw
HHU | VCU | PFU
warning: only food mentions, otherwise its all just fluff + unhinged wonwoo in his part !! not proofread btw !!
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CHOI SEUNGCHEOL (S.COUPS)
hes so excited to bake a cake w his baby 🥺
but this man gets so pouty so easily
he'd prob drop an egg and get pouty or accidentally spill flour on the counter
but he'd try his best to be helpful yk
trying to follow the recipe as best he can
and if u even SIGH out of slight annoyance while trying to mix the batter
he WILL be taking the beater from u and doing it for u
would also do his best to give u a massage afterwards
he says he'll take them out of the oven for u bc he doesnt want u to feel the heat from it so he does it (while wearing mitts ofc)
and then he gets pouty bc its too hot
even tho he wanted to do it 💀
definitely pouty if the cake was deformed
would def help u clean up the mess
CUDDLES AFTER 🥺
JEON WONWOO
i am a firm believer of unhinged wonwoo with his s/o
like yes he'd follow the recipe
but what if he's in a silly goofy mood
would probably say he's an expert baker because he played cooking mama every day for two weeks 💀
prob says "f**k the recipe, i'll bake like cooking mama"
but still follows the recipe bc of you
maybe heart shaped cookies (like that one picture)*
gives u a kiss after bc the cookies were so good
KIM MINGYU
this man is a klutz but also an amazing chef??
most definitely the best baker in hhu
but not without almost breaking your stand mixer
or getting batter all over the counter and some splattering on the walls 😔
cracked an egg but when he went to put the yolk in another bowl for the recipe, it exploded
dw though, your desserts turned out fine
he was pouty abt the stand mixer almost breaking (BUT ITS FINE)
but thats nothing cuddles cant solve, isn't it?
CHWE HANSOL (VERNON)
its vernon.
there is a very low chance that the dessert will end up edible
why?
because he will most definitely forget to read the recipe measurements and it might end up so sweet that it'll give you a cavity within the first bite
or it could end up as him putting too much salt instead of sugar
reason being, the poor boy couldnt tell the difference bc he missed the jars labels 😭
it may not end up edible
but its the thought that counts, right?
at least he helped his beautiful s/o 🤩
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A/N - FINALY DID THE HHU VER!! omg posting this in the daytime instead of the dead of night? im so proud of myself 🤭 a huge thank u to @kwantaro mahi <3 for helping me come with a few of the hcs, so ty mahi !!
*this photo of wonwoo that i was talking about
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chososdiscordkitten · 3 months
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Obsessive!Choso♡ pt 10
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pt 9 here
Content: direct cont of last chapter, just more unshamed flirting, uncanon hcs on how he grew up, MENTIONED of Choso seeing reader as untouched (?), small time skip for my own sanity. Choso is an ex smoker- ill circle back to that, talk of exes, not so much stalking- again, next chap will have that dw, some excerpts from Winnie the Pooh- another hc of mine, its happening guys. Word Count: 6.8k
(a.n) wow, a whole month and im barely posting, (sorry) new writing style too👍🏽 the lil .𖥔 ݁ ˖ .  ₊˚⊹⋆ ⁺   . guys mean a different scene btw.
Taglist: @eristi @sunaumi @ex-ria @just-pure-trash @kha-0s @iluvreinah @iamboredowo @integers @waytootiredforthisss @1arminsimp @hannas16 @chosowhore @tojicvmslut @ofalcaodacolinablue @thesharkcollector @mochipip @hotvillianapologist @ziklope @saeline @morinuu @b3llair3 @24hrnanami
⋆ ˚。 ⋆୨♡୧ ⋆ ˚。 ⋆
Looking at you, Choso felt the sudden urge to tell you just how much he loved you. Sitting in his shabby apartment- not caring for the mess or how dingey it was. Still- you cared enough to go see him. He knew it was you- and it will always be you. Be it the dissolving cold medicine in his tummy- or if he really felt this way. In that moment, Choso was so sure he loved you, issues and all. “This is what happens when you spend more time outside than inside.” you hummed, being able to hear his ragged breathing from the chair.
“I hardly get sick.” he coughed, making you perch your eyebrows, all but saying ‘be real.’ He gulped, feeling his sore throat make it difficult to swallow.
“It's true.” he huffed, looking at you seriously. “You strike me as someone with a…” you hesitated, trying to find the correct word. Making him look at you with curious eyes, “-with a wavering immune system.” You grinned, making him nod his head in agreement. “You don't get sick?” he asked, tone sincere. “I never get sick.” you hummed, flaunting your health in his face. “It's been 3 years since I had a cold so-” you laughed, “I can truly say- I don't get sick.” he looked at you with believing eyes. 
“You're right though- I do have a sucky immune system,” he sighed, twiddling with his thumbs in his lap, you hummed with a smile. “Too much of what growing up?” you asked, sensing it was caused by something from his upbringing. Choso grimaced, not wanting to admit it. Mind flashing back to the instagram story you posted at the beginning of the semester. Something about ‘why smoke when so many things are trying to kill you-’
You twitched your head, waiting for him to answer. He inhaled, looking away from you as though you were already scolding him. “I used to be a heavy-” he started, lowering his tone. “...smoker.” he mumbled, squeezing his eyes shut- waiting for you to start speaking. You sighed, making him turn his head over to look at you again, eyes squinted and arms crossed. Nodding your head ‘no’ disapprovingly. “Not anymore though-” he defended, not wanting to upset you. Face churned with worry that this was something you'd never forgive.
You gave him a half laugh, “Choso- I don't care if you used to smoke-” you furrowed your eyebrows, not knowing why he thought he had to defend himself to you. “I mean-” you started, seeing his face fall. “I obviously care if you do- but this was before you knew me.” You smiled, making him exhale the breath he held in his chest. “And besides, who am I to scold you on a bad habit?” you hummed, making him open his mouth to speak. “It doesn't bother you?” he leaned onto his hand planted on the bed, intrigued to hear your answer.
“It would bother me in a- ‘want you to be healthy’ way.” you droned, looking away from his face- being able to see small glimmers form in his eyes at your words. “But if it's your choice, and you want to do it. Don't let my opinions base your choices.” you assured, making him rest back onto his bed in ease. Pressing the back of his head onto the wall in thought. Even if you told him not to- he'd still use your words to make his life choices. ‘Because it is only you who I am trying to impress.’
Inhaling sharply at the feeling of heavy tension in the air, looking to his nightstand and scanning a small stack of books. Noticing he had some of the same ones you had on your nightstand. “Winnie The Pooh?” you asked, looking at his blushed cheeks and pinched eyebrows at your observation. “I uh- I used to read it to my brothers.” He mumbled, seeing your delicate hands pick up the green cover, flipping through the well cared for pages with a smile.
“I brought it with me knowing if I left it, they'd find a way to destroy it.” he laughed. You looked back to him as you gently flipped through the pages, smiling when you saw the small rips and folds from how long he had it. Noticing his slow blinks and how he was manually breathing now-
“All the years I spent repeating those pages and I don't remember a single thing from them.” he muttered, looking down at his hands- almost sad. You blinked back to look at him, “Why’s that?” you hummed with a small smile, secretly elated that he was finally opening up a little, instead of asking about you. “I never focused on the words.” he muttered, looking at the tearing corners of the green cloth cover.
“I think it's because I always tried to make sure they were entertained- that they enjoyed what I read.” he mumbled, seeing you carefully flip the pages. Knowing it held sentimental value, Choso looked at your gentle grasp on the books as though you were holding his heart in your hands. Using all the care in the world as you examined it. “How old were you?” you asked, closing the cover and placing it on your lap. Scanning his soft expression at your question. 
“When you first read it to them?” You clarified making him bat his eyes down to his hands, unable to withstand the burning gaze you held to his skin. “Eight- maybe nine.” he mumbled, unpleasant memories flooding into his mind again. “Before your mom-?” you pressed, seeing his eyebrows furrow. With a small nod, he exhaled, “I picked it up one day. Not knowing I'd reread it for the next 13 years.” Choso scoffed Remembering the last time he read it to Yuuji, a bittersweet smile on his lips. “Sad huh?” he looked back at you, seeing your eyebrows curled up with sad eyes below them.
You inhaled, placing your hand flat against the book on your lap, “No, Choso. It's not sad.” You grinned, “It's actually really sweet.”, letting out a half laugh from your nose. Holding up your thumb and pointer finger, pinching the air “A tiny bit sad-” you whispered, making him let out a half laugh from his chest. “But sweet.” you assured.
Choso gave you a few slow blinks, feeling his throat dry. Closing his eyes in an attempt to blink, but keeping them closed. “M’tired.” he mumbled, making your shoulders tense- coming to the realization that you infiltrated his space uninvited. You widened your eyes, “Shit- sorry-” you whispered, placing the book on his night stand before going to stand up. Choso’s eyes flashed open, reaching for your wrist. Being able to fully wrap his fingers around it. Looking up at you with panicked eyes, a stare you hadn’t seen before.
“Stay.” he whispered, looking down at him with wide eyes, his grip on your wrist wasn't firm- showing you just how tired he was. “Please.” Soft tone making you blink down at him. It's not as though you needed any convincing. 
You smiled, pressing your other hand onto his knuckles. Soothing his nerves, “Okay.” you whispered, sitting back down. “I'll stay.” you murmured, his shoulders easing as his cheeks blushed at the embarrassment. “Lay down.” you instructed, reaching for the book again. Furrowing your eyebrows when you saw him slowly easing into his own bed. Almost uncomfortably. 
Choso looked over to you, resting his head lightly on the pillows to avoid the embarrassment of his bed frame collapsing. He huffed a pained laugh from his chest seeing your expression, “If I move too quickly- it'll break.” he explained, making you nod your head with a smile. “Now I know what to get you for your birthday.” you murmured to yourself, making him let out a weak ‘haha’, as his eyes threatened to close. His grip on your hand tightening, to be sure you wouldn't leave if he went to sleep.
Scooching the rolling chair closer to the bed, side of your thigh pressed against his mattress and you faced him. “I think it's your turn to be read to.” you mumbled, pulling your hand from his briefly and placing the book back on your lap, cracking it open, placing the spine between your closed thighs and holding onto his hand again. 
Thumb brushing gently against his knuckles, as your fingers flipped the pages. Tender gaze staring at you as though this was the first time he was ever taken care of. As though this was a marvel.
Making sure to keep your tone soft- inhaling softly before you started, “Here is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now-” the words fell from your lips in whispers, gracing his ears as he looked at the afternoon sun peaking through. His eyes scanning your features- the way the sun peeked through your eyelashes, how you smiled reading the childish words. When you looked back to him to see if he was still with you, and how gentle you were. Holding his calloused hand as though he was made of lace.
Eternally grateful for the universe putting you here. “Isn’t it funny how a bear likes honey?” you spoke gently, fingers grazing the edge of the old page.
Being able to see every unique characteristic that graced your skin thanks to the warm sun. “It's a very funny thought that if bears were Bees, They'd build their nests at the bottom of trees.” you smiled at the silly rhyme, cheekbones glowing when you grinned. Unaware of how badly he yearned for you. How he missed you even if you were sitting inches away from him.
“How sweet to be a cloud, floating in the blue. Every little cloud always sings aloud.” hazy eyes looking at you through his eyelashes, parting his lips that threatened to speak before his mind caught up. ‘It’s you.’ he thought, feeling his lips move, the words at the tip of his tongue as you flipped the page.
Looking up at him from the book, making him close his lips, “It makes him very proud to be a little cloud.” you smiled at him. “Are you proud to be a little cloud Choso?” you hummed with a sappy smile, making him close his eyes and nod, “Only if you're a cloud with me.” he croaked quietly, making you tighten your grip on his hand before continuing to read.
Choso looked at you with a content smile on his lips, heart beating strongly in his chest. Blinks become longer and longer as you flip the page. Your words become mumbles in his mind as his blinking halted. His hand slowly went limp in yours as you continued reading softly. 
Hearing soft inhales and exhales from him as you closed the book. Soft eyes scanning his expression, finding it adorable how quick he fell asleep. But the adoration churned to sadness- not knowing precisely why he was never read to as a child. But knowing he grew up always taking care of everyone but himself, you saw it in the way he spoke to you. In the way he tried sparing your feelings anytime he'd say something out of turn, and most of all you tasted it in the way he cooked for you.
Thinking how crazy it was that even if you had been friends with him only for a few weeks- you still felt sad for him. You felt. For him. Which was more than you could say for anyone else you had met in that place. 
You huffed with a smile, looking away from him as you derailed your own train of thought. Now taking the chance to look around his apartment- at the walls, at the broken blinds, at the small kitchen. You looked back down to the hand that softly held yours, taking the time to admire them now that he wasn't awake to catch you. 
Calloused- but they were warm. Tender. Brutish knuckles that you knew held power behind them, softly scanning the scars he told you stories about. Slowly pulling your hand from his grasp, grazing the tips of your fingers on his painted nails. Admiring how well you painted them. 
Snapping yourself out of the daze you put yourself in, suddenly feeling very creepy for staring at your friend who was innocently sleeping. You nodded your head at your wandering thoughts, god. Here he was practically dying of the plague and you were being skeevy. With a sigh you pressed your hand to your forehead, trying to think on what to do now. You didn't want to leave- but it seemed even weirder to stay. You inhaled, pushing the chairs' wheels back with your feet, standing up and looking down to him.
All but saying it since it was smeared on your expression, thankful he was sleeping or else he'd see it. Here he was- man who you put so much effort into flirting with. You see, with most men- they were easy. One little bat of the eye and a sweet smile and they'd do anything to take you home. But with him- he'd offer to take you home, without any ulterior motives.. Walk you up to your doorstep to be sure you are safe. Which only made the kindness you had easier to give. 
So there you were, disguising your snooping as being kind. Taking quiet steps around his apartment. Not daring to actually open anything- but it was tempting. Hands behind your back as you looked at the small crack of his closet door. Squinting at it before looking to his kitchen, making sure to step quietly on the creaky wood floors. Looking back at him anytime a creak was a little too noisy. 
Curious as to what was in his fridge- as good as he cooked he must have more than enough ingredients in his fridge, right? 
Staring into Choso’s fridge, furrowed eyebrows staring at one old lime and a single bottle of ketchup. It looked sadder than the one at your own house did. You closed the white door and opened the freezer- nothing. You expected at least liquor- any college student with a fridge has at least a bottle to fall back on. 
You looked back at Choso, almost scolding him in your mind. And with the sight of his sleeping face- the marvelous idea popped into your mind. Taking a few steps to stand above his desk, taking the pink post-it stack and a black pen before writing a small note. Smiling as you wrote the stupid words. 
Placing the pink post- it on his night stand, smiling before looking down to his peaceful expression. Inhaling quickly before walking back to the entryway, coat in hand as you look back once more before opening the door- making sure not to lock it for when you'd be back.
Even in his sleep Choso heard the door close, but that's not what woke him. What woke him was his neighbor slamming their front door shut. Making him jolt awake in his own bed. Panicked eyes scanning the four walls of his apartment expecting to see you, only for you not to greet him when he woke. Choso felt a little disappointed. Mainly with himself for thinking you'd be here when he woke. That you'd wait for him. 
He sighed, sitting up slowly and trying to blink away his exhaustion. Looking to his nightstand and seeing a misplaced post-it, small smile forming on his ill lips as he read your writing. ‘Had to go get a few things. be good and take ur medicine! I'll be back soon :) - the best nurse you will ever have,’ he smiled reading your initials at the bottom of the note.
 And as you instructed, Choso took the medicine you placed on his side table, noticing his throat wasn't as achy as it was before you got there.
There was a hint of panic in his breaths, anxiety and trailing thoughts scared that you snooped. That you found something that you shouldn't have. Even if he hid everything- there was still the fear that he forgot something. Choso sighed and looked over to where he tossed his phone, faced down and silent. He picked it up and saw way too many notifications from his brother, with a sigh he returned his call. 
Closing his eyes as the dial rang through his ear. Hearing the receiver click- ‘hello?’ He heard his brother's voice in his ear. “You called?” he huffed, knowing his voice sounded a bit groggy. 
‘I was trying to cockblock you.’ Yuuji laughed, making Choso scoff and roll his eyes. Leaning an arm on the bed, knowing not to take his jokes too seriously. “You'd do that to your big brother?” taking a sarcastic tone, as he felt his brain pound against his skull.
Choso heard a quiet snicker come from the phone, ‘How are you feeling?’ Yuuji asked, Choso gave an exasperated sigh. “Better. I feel better. I think the worst is over.” Choso grumbled, hearing his brother let out agreeing hums.
‘Is your ‘friend’ still there?’ Yuuji asked in an accusatory tone, “No. No, they left.” Choso exhaled, flashing his eyes to that vent he hid his shame in. ‘Good thing or a bad thing?’ he asked knowing his big brother had a tendency to overcomplicate his own feelings. “I have-” he exhaled, staring at the door of his apartment, “No idea Yuuji.” he closed his eyes, feeling the confusion and those complicated feelings eat away at the illness.
He gave a strained laugh from his chest in disbelief, “I have no clue what I'm doing.” closing his eyes and remembering all the times you've tried to make a step forward. Only for Choso to take 3 back. “I’m fucking this up Yuuji.” he huffed, his baby brother was silent on the other line, hearing the worries spill from his mouth. 
‘How?’ Yuuji asked, only wanting to gauge how to go about this. “I came here for you guys. To be better. For you all to be comfortable and happy.” he started, hearing Yuuji sigh through the phone, ‘I've told you a million times- you don't have to worry about us.’ His brother had assured him of this plenty of times. Choso felt small whenever he tried to talk about it but the day came when he felt a wisp of resentment in his heart. And he knew he had to talk about it or else he'd grow angry towards the reason he was put on this planet.
And it was true, Choso eased off a little. After a lengthy conversation with Eso about how it feels to be plagued with being the oldest- his brother assured him he was put on this planet with no purpose. He didn't have to live just for them.
Then came the tattoos and the piercings, trying to find himself in the body mutilation. Somewhere in his heart he knew he came to college to find himself too. Just like you did.
‘You like this person?’ Yuuji spoke up, throwing Choso out of his thoughts. It was a thought he didn't want to think, in his mind he loved you. It felt like true love when he was with you. But actually saying it- telling his brother that you, a person he didn't know a few months ago, had invaded his goal of being better for his family. It was a hard thing to say, and to think.
That he wasn't there just for his family and himself anymore, he was here for you now too. 
“I do Yuuji.” he scoffed, hearing the smile form on his brother's face through the phone. ‘In a ‘this persons pretty cool’ or like how I feel about that actress from the hunger games?’ Yuuji joked, making Choso lean his elbows on his knees and smile, “Neither-” Choso scoffed, “In a way I feel consumed by them.” he mumbled, hearing pensative noises coming from the phone, ‘Maybe m’not the best person to speak to this about-’ he laughed, ‘I've never felt ‘consumed’ by how much I liked someone before.’ he admitted, making Choso nod his head disapprovingly.
Hearing footsteps darken his doorway- along with the brass doorknob turning, frightened that it was someone other than you. Only it was you- stepping into his apartment as though it was your own. Your shocked eyes looking at Choso’s face, not expecting to see him awake. “Sorry-” you grinned with a whisper, stepping in fully and softly closing the door behind you. Seeing he was on the phone.
‘Did they come back?!’ Yuuji blurted, “I'll call you later.” he mumbled into the phone, seeing you place handfuls of groceries onto the kitchen counter. Making his cheeks blush at how domestic this whole thing was starting to feel. His brother started yapping a million questions before Choso pulled the phone from his ear, “Later. Yuuji.” taking a stern tone as he clicked the red button on the screen.
In Choso’s heart he felt guilt- guilty for even thinking about questioning his devotion towards you. All he needed to see was that sweet smile grace your lips to remember how he felt. 
“I didn't know what to bring- so I brought it all.” you huffed with a smile, unpacking the groceries from the plastic bags. Choso looked at you baffled at the unnecessary act of kindness. Looking at him with sweet eyes, “You look better.” You smiled with closed lips, Choso’s cheeks tingled at the tone you took. “Do I?” he muttered, pushing a few stray strands of hair behind his ear. 
“Your color came back- Before I left you looked like a ghost.” You joked, turning around and placing a few bags of vegetables in his fridge, making Choso cringe knowing you had seen the sad contents of his fridge. “My uh-” he shifted on his bed, watching as you put away the various items you bought for him. “-brothers tell me I look like a ghost most of the time.” he smiled, hearing your shoes thump on the vinyl flooring. 
You scoffed, looking at his face once more, tilting your head as you examined his features. Choso couldnt help but squirm feeling your eyes on him. You let out a small giggle, looking away from him before opening a bag of bread. “You do.” he sighed in defeat, watching your nodding head as you pulled out two slices from the thin bag. 
“Shit-” you mouthed, looking up at him as you held the bread in your hands, “Can I… borrow your stove?” you grimaced, scanning his confused expression. “I'm starving.” you reiterated, noticing he made that face he made when his mind would run a million miles a minute as he thought.
What confused him wasn't the question- more like ‘You've already made yourself at home- why ask to use my stove? What's mine is yours.’ but what stuttered from his lips was, “Yeah- go for it.” as you reached into a cupboard, pulling out a charred skillet as though you were the one who put it there, your delicate hands turning the metal knobs on the stove. 
Choso watched you from a distance- as though if he got too close you'd fade away. Watching as you buttered both sides of each slice before placing them on the skillet, “You want one?” you hummed, unwrapping the yellow squares of cheese and placing them onto the toasting bread.
Choso smiled, “I thought you didn't cook?” he spouted sarcastically, watching as you plucked a plastic spatula from the utensil holder, “Two pieces of bread and a slice of cheese is not cooking.” you retorted with a smile, flipping the toasted slices of bread. “Your opportunity for a grilled cheese made with love is waning, Choso.” you teased, seeing his face fall at the sudden words. 
Nodding his head quickly once he processed your choice of words, “Plates?” you asked, even from a distance you were able to see his pupils dilate. He smiled, seeing your lips form a smile along with him. “How mad would you be if I told you I don't have any…?” he grinned, making you suck your teeth harshly, a snide comment forming on your tongue but holding it back. 
Plucking two white kitchen napkins from the stray roll he had on the counter, placing the well toasted grilled cheese onto it before scooping it in your hands. Taking a few paces towards him, looking down at your feet as you stopped right before him. “You need plates.” you practically scolded, making him look up at you with a bashful grin. “I know.” he whispered, taking the napkin plate from your hands- his fingertips grazing against the back of your palm. 
The feeling of shock from touching you diminishes with every purposeful graze from his hands. You irked your head, shaking off the goosebumps that formed on your arms as you walked back to the stove, flashing a few stares to him as you buttered the sides of your own grilled cheese. 
Placing the toasted bread onto your own napkin plate, tying a small knot onto the bread bag, cleaning up after yourself as Choso held the sandwich in his hands. Waiting for you to finish so he could eat. 
You looked up from the counter, huffing with a small chuckle, “Choso you can eat.” You flashed him a toothy smile as you turned off the stove, “M’waiting for you.” he spoke with all the honesty he could muster.
'I will always wait for you.’ he thought, a glimmer shining in his eyes as he bounced his knee slowly. 
“Don't wait for me Choso.” you muttered, as though you read his mind, picking up your makeshift plate and walking over to him, sitting back onto his rolling chair as he watched you with a grin. 
Nodding your head- practically having to give him permission to eat, raising the sandwich to his mouth and taking a bite. Following what he did as you both chewed in silence. 
“Why'd you bring me groceries?” he spat, almost as though his mouth spoke before he could think about it. You thought about it- not having any real reason other than it felt like it was the right thing to do. “No man should have to live with an empty fridge.” you settled on that being a decent response, Choso nodded his head, agreeing with what you said. 
“I'll pay you back-” he declared, seeing your face glow with a cheerful smile, “You don't have to.” you scoffed, holding the crumbly bread in your hands. “S’what…friends do for each other.” there- you did it again. You hesitated before calling him your friend. Choso noticed this since you tried to present him to your roommates friends.
“Why're you so nice to me?” he breathed, avoiding your eyes as he looked down to the sandwich. “Were back on this again?” you kidded seeing his smile fall- actually thinking on why you were being kind, “If we're being honest- you brought this up first.” He defended coyly, “Choso.” you called his name seriously, making his eyes bat up to look at you with a hung head, “I’m nice to you because I like you.” You furrowed your eyebrows as you looked at him. 
“You're nice to everyone though-” he retorted quietly, trying his best to not let the blatant jealousy show through his tone. “I pretend to be nice to everyone, yeah-” you smiled, “But I have never been- this. Nice to anyone before.” You assured, your cheeks warming from his borderline possessive words. 
Choso looked at you with furrowed eyebrows, all but asking ‘Really?’ nodding your head in response. “I promise.” Those words meant more to Choso than you'd ever know, it was as though you swore on the thing closest to your heart to him. Placing the sandwich onto the napkin atop your thighs, holding out a childish pinkie and looking at him with soft eyes, ‘Promise.’ you mouthed, Choso raised a hesitant hand, holding out his pinkie as he looked into your eyes.
Interlocking your pinkies as he felt the difference in size, “And I don't like anyone enough to be this nice.” You pulled your pinkie from his, seeing his expression show he wasn't fully convinced on the idea. 
“Can I tell you a secret?” you hushed, seeing his eyes peek up and look at you through thick eyelashes. 
Nodding his head earnestly, leaning in a little bit more, “I hate everyone in the world except you right now.” 
The words you meant in a joking way- only saying them to make him lighten up. It wasn't as though they didn't have some truth- right now everyone sucked and he was the only one who cared enough to make things better.
But to him, those words were all but a confession- a confession that all this time he wasn't a crazed stalker who embedded himself in your life. Those words made his doubts of what he was doing disappear almost entirely. 
“You mean that?” he spoke with avoidant eyes and blushing pink cheeks. You exhaled, earning Choso to look back to your eyes, “I do.” 
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ .  ₊˚⊹⋆ ⁺   .
After that illuminating morning spent with you, he made sure to be more cautious with what he'd say- how he'd act towards you. But his attempts at caution only made his slip ups more apparent. 
The last week of January passed by in seconds to Choso, having you sitting next to him in the classes you had together made life easier. Classes spent drawing on his pale skin to pass the time, and he'd let you- Choso would try his very best to control the warmth that he was sure made his ears turn a shade of pink. But it's not like he had to hide his shamed blushes from you anymore. 
Little by little your touch became a constant in his life- your soft hands pulling the rings from his calloused ones, fiddling with them in class as the professor spoke. Turning them while they were still on his fingers as his knee bounced nervously. Being able to smell your perfume- even able to feel your nails graze against his skin as you toyed with his jewelry. 
The habit of him walking you home slowly diminished in the first week of February, now walking to his apartment to spend more time together more often than not. Playing kids board games on his apartment floor after he told you that- “I never really played them.” when you asked if he's ever gone through an entire game of monopoly, “I only ever over saw as my brothers played-” he smiled, seeing you look at him bewildered. “Y'know. To make sure no one cheated.” 
To which you responded with ‘borrowing’ the board games from your house, bringing them to his apartment. Seeing it as an opportunity to get to know him better through the childrens games. What he liked most about the time spent playing the games was that you'd leave your phone on his kitchen counter, on do not disturb and faced down. He liked that there wasn't anything to distract you from him.
The topic of exes was brought up hesitantly by you- unsure if you wanted to know about his past in that aspect. 
Sitting on the floor of his apartment, knees crossed as you faced each other, “Any past lovers I should expect on my doorstep?” You hummed casually, placing a green uno card onto the small stack, “Not that I know of. No.” he smiled to himself, “That you know of?” you asked sarcastically, seeing him place a card into the pile with a scoff. 
“No. Don't expect any ‘ex lovers’ at your door-” he called your name almost in a scolding tone. You nodded mockingly, “Any at all?” you examined your cards as you plucked one from your stack. Choso looked at you- unsure of what you were getting at. “No?” 
“No girlfriends- or boyfriends- or partne-” you were interrupted by Choso’s shoulders slumping with furrowed eyebrows. Silencing your question as he placed a card onto the pile, “...Can I ask why?” You chirped, seeing his low eyes look up from the colorful cards and think about it. 
“There was just never time.” he sighed, feeling embarrassed by your curiosity. Making you nod your head in agreement. Choso didn't even want to think about your exes, how many there were or if you loved any of them. He liked picturing you as an untouched, pristine, glass statue- only to be held by him. And thinking that you will only ever love him. 
“Even when you came here?” you pressed, his lips forcing a smile- “Nope.” his response was curt- waiting for you to place a card onto the pile. “Why?” your tone was accusatory- almost as though you were trying to dance around the real reason you were asking these questions. “S’your turn.” he mumbled, looking up from his cards and looking at you, “..What?” you asked confused as to what he was saying.
“It's your turn-” he spoke your name- flashing his eyes down to your cards as you inhaled, understanding what he meant. Picking a random card and placing it onto the stack, Choso looked at your parting lips- daring to keep pressing the question.
Even if he was starting to feel a sliver of irritation- he found it adorable that you were curious about that part of his life. “Choso.” you spoke, earning his eyebrow to arch before he responded with your name in the same tone you used. You sighed in defeat, making him tilt his head to the side. Thinking very hard as he skimmed through the distant memories of anyone he had a crush on growing up. 
“Uh- there was my neighbor in the second grade- then in the fourth grade there was this girl who I used to chase around the playground- and then in middle school I started exploring the world of people I could like- then in my freshman year I got my first-” he babbled, oversharing the meaningless information that you asked for with a sarcastic tone, trying to prove a point. “Okay-okay. I get it.” you interrupted with a laugh “I don't see the point in talking about the past when it does nothing for us.” he spoke as he arranged the cards in his hands. 
‘Us- I’m already calling me nd you,‘us’ he thought as you spoke “It helps me get to know you.” You defended, “You ever have a question- ask me it directly, please.” he smiled, “Don't dance around it-” 
“Have you ever loved anyone?” you interrupted, Choso looked at you with tender eyes. “Like- love, love?” you clarified, only your question didn't need any clarification, Choso knew what you were talking about. 
He nodded his head no, “No I haven't.” he admitted, looking down to his cards before picking one and placing it in the growing pile. “Have you ever loved anyone?” he repeated your question, for once, you were left scrambling for words. “N-no.” You admitted almost in defense, “There were times I thought I was in love.” you started, mentally Choso was cursing whatever person you loved before him. 
“But I was just a kid. So no, I've never loved anyone.” you finished, placing a card on the useless pile, and gathering the cards since neither of you were really playing the game anymore.
The salty conversation ended right there, Choso didn't want to hear of your past relationships- and you didn't want to embarrass him further by asking again. But the tension in the air was gone the next time you saw him, bringing up how you were thinking of moving out of your house. 
Choso’s hands picking upa stack of playing cards and shuffling them with his hands, “Why?” he asked, scanning your irritated expression as you thought about the roommates waiting for you. “People just- suck.” you smiled, seeing his hands carefully put away the  cards in the torn up box. Standing up and walking towards the kitchen counter, eyeing your phone as his back faced you.
Knowing you wouldn't be able to see if he took a peek- just one peek. 
Pretending to keep idle hands as he feigned looking at the game boards, “Your roommates again?” he asked as his hand inched towards your phone. Hearing you let out an exaggerated sigh, “Yes, they've been extra annoying recently.” you closed your eyes, waiting for him to come back with a new game. 
Choso gulped, his fingers flipping the side of your phone quietly, “Why's that?” he mindlessly replied as your phone screen light up. Seeing you kept the family picture of him and his brothers as your background, “They've been nagging and nagging about how I don't do my ‘chores’-” you complained, “I'm not even there as much anymore.” you continued.
Choso’s eyes scanned the growing list of notifications- squinting his eyes as he saw a text from a contact named ‘asshole’. You sighed, defeated by the growing list of issues awaiting you at that house. “And I'm broke.” You closed your eyes, leaning on your palms as you leaned your head back. “Broke huh?” he muttered, scrolling as he smiled at your claim. 
“Yup. No more sugar daddy money left- which is unfortunate.” You whispered to yourself. Choso heard it- but to protect his peace and not pick a fight over your choice of words. He ignored that little comment.
“Scrabble?” he mindlessly asked, “Nah s’too much thinking for me right now.” 
‘See you later today’ the message read with a heart, Choso couldn't help but think that you were being lured into something from that message, “How about-” he trailed on, placing your phone back onto the counter quietly as you sighed, “Connect 4?” he picked up the battered box and heard an agreeing ‘okay’ from your lips.
Walking back to the dedicated ‘board game’ spot at the center of his apartment, sitting down and placing the box between you. “Y'know- I looked at these apartments before I chose to live in that house.” you smiled as he slid the lid off the box, Choso’s face fell- thinking of how cruel the world was for taking away the opportunity of having you as a neighbor.
“You didn't like it here?” he joked, making you let out a small chortle as he set up the blue plastic. “I just didn’t wanna be alone.” you admitted, seeing Choso hold up his hands- a red chip in one and a yellow chip in the other, taking the red chip from his hand before he pushed your chips to your side of the grid.
“And you're thinking of moving into a unit?” he scoffed almost sarcastically, waiting for you to decide where to put your first chip. “I mean- even if they're constantly freezing. I just might.” you admitted honestly, seeing Choso’s fingers hover above the slot. Staring at you as he pictured you being his neighbor. 
You looked at him with raised eyebrows, “You don't like that idea?” you scoffed, seeing him nod his head ‘no’ before dropping a yellow chip into one of the slots, “You're probably thinking, ‘gee why not just move into my apartment while you're at it.” You giggled, dropping a red chip into the grid without thinking too hard, Choso titled his head- almost as though that's exactly what he was thinking.
“M’kidding. Choso.” You clarified, making him exhale at how flustered he was starting to feel. “It wouldn't be any different than it is now though-” you smiled, seeing his shaky hand drop a chip into the game- almost purposefully avoiding the ones you previously dropped, “I'm already here everyday.” you scoffed, unknowing your words were only making Choso’s ears burn below his hair.
“S-speaking of-” he found an opening of asking you the question that had been heavy in his mind ever since you brought it up, “I was thinking about- uh-” he struggled to find the words, “The uh….date?” he stuttered, blinking his eyes down to his chips and back at you. 
“You remember that?” you smiled, if he was being honest- the words hit him like a ton of bricks aimed directly to his heart. “...You don't?” he asked- pained and saddened. “Of course I do- I just,” you grimaced, “Didn't expect you to remember.” you admitted, “Y’know, since you were dying of bubonic plague.” you joked as you dropped a red chip into the game. 
“It was a small cold-” he defended, “And I do remember.” he continued, scanning your lax expression as he tried stepping through the seemingly difficult conversation.
“I wasn't gonna hold it against you-” you smiled, “You were feverish and on the brink of death-” you bantered, “I was not.” he defended himself, “You wanna take me out on a date Choso?” you asked teasingly- already knowing the answer but wanting to hear it from him again. 
“Will you let me?” he blushed, you looked at him surprised by his quick quip. With a smug smile, you were thinking things that should not be thought of at that moment.
-
pt 11 here
IM SOOOO SORRY FOR TAKING SOO LONG, PT 11 WILL BE POSTED ON VALENTINES DAY..... HEHEHEHE... (when can I start writing about the intimate things ;-;)
⋆ ˚。 ⋆୨♡୧ ⋆ ˚。 ⋆
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astrxealis · 2 years
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dude what the fuck it feels weird but so not weird being a year older now
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