#excuse me as i drown in my own sorrow

[thatdammchickennugget]

hii! i was wondering if you could do theodore nott x griffindor reader where theyre in a relationship but he decides to break up with her, because he got the mark, to protect her by making her hate him, but after the war he explains everything and they get back together, like its very angty then fluffy

i know this is so weird im sorry 😭😭

(btw i love your writing!!!)

-🪩

Second Chances

pairing -theodore nott x fem!reader

warnings - angst with a happy ending, established relationship, fighting, mention of y/n

a/n - not weird at all, thank you for requesting!! I'm finding out angst really isn't my strong suit but I hope this is okay 💕

wordcount - 1.4k

You never thought you'd see the day your boyfriend would become distant and cold.Of course, you had seen him act this way with other students before, but never with you. His once warm gaze now held a hint of sadness, and his touch, once comforting, now felt like a fleeting memory.

Theo had changed since the war began, his demeanor growing more guarded with each passing day. You couldn't understand why he was pulling away from you, why he seemed so determined to push you out of his life. Now was exactly the time you should be there for each other more than ever before.

It was a chilly evening when Theo finally decided to confront you. He asked you to meet him on the astronomy tower, his expression unreadable as he watched you approach. The hopes that he would finally tell you what was wrong and everything would go back to the way it used to be vanished instantly.

"Y/n," he began, his voice tinged with a hint of sorrow. "We need to talk."

Your heart sank at the seriousness of his tone, a sense of dread settling in the pit of your stomach. You nodded silently, urging him to continue.

"I... I think it's best if we end things," he said, his words heavy with regret. "It's not safe for us to be together, not with everything that's happening."

Confusion clouded your thoughts as you struggled to comprehend his words. "But... why?" you tried to keep the words steady, your voice barely above a whisper.

Theo's gaze flickered with pain as he reached out to touch your cheek, his touch gentle yet filled with a sense of finality. "I've joined the Dark Lord," he confessed, his voice barely a whisper. "And I can't risk putting you in danger."

As his admission hung in the air, the weight of his words crashing down on you like a ton of bricks, a mix of disbelief and rage flooded your senses. You recoiled from his touch, shaking your head in disbelief.

"You've... you've done what?" Your voice trembled with a mixture of hurt and fury, your fists clenched at your sides. "You've joined him? After everything we've talked about? After all the times we swore we'd fight together?"

Theo's gaze faltered under your intense scrutiny, his expression pained as he struggled to find the right words to explain himself. But the excuses fell flat in your ears, drowned out by the sound of your own heartbeat pounding in your ears.

"You chose him over me," you accused, your voice laced with venom as you took a step back, putting distance between yourself and the man who had once held your heart.

Tears of anger and betrayal welled up in your eyes, threatening to spill over as you struggled to make sense of the shattered pieces of your reality. How could he have betrayed everything you believed in? How could he have turned his back on you so callously?

"I trusted you," you whispered, your voice barely a whisper as you turned away, unable to bear the sight of the man who had broken your heart. "But you've proven that trust means nothing to you."

And with those final words, you walked away, leaving Theo standing alone on the astronomy tower, rubbing at the black ink covering his forearm, his heart heavy with regret and the knowledge that he had lost the one person who had ever truly mattered to him.

ੈ♡˳

Two years had passed since that fateful night on the astronomy tower. The war was over, but the scars it left behind still lingered, etched into the hearts of those who had survived. You had tried to move on, burying the pain of betrayal beneath a facade of strength and resilience. But deep down, the ache of losing Theo still haunted you, a constant reminder of the love you had lost.

As you made your way through Diagon Alley, lost in thought, you caught sight of his familiar figure in the crowd. Your heart skipped a beat as you recognized him instantly, despite the passing of time. Theodore Nott stood just a few feet away, his gaze searching the crowd as if looking for someone.

Panic seized you at the sight of him, memories of the pain and betrayal flooding back with a vengeance. You turned on your heel, intending to slip away unnoticed, but fate had other plans.

"Y/n, wait!"

His voice cut through the bustling noise of the street, and while cursing yourself, you froze in your tracks. You resisted the urge to look back, steeling yourself against the rush of emotions threatening to overwhelm you.

But Theo was persistent, his footsteps quickening as he closed the distance between you. Before you could react, he was standing before you, his eyes filled with a mixture of regret and longing.

"We need to talk," he said, his voice soft yet filled with urgency.

You bristled at his words, the bitterness of betrayal still fresh in your mind. "I have nothing to say to you," you spat, your voice dripping with disdain.

He flinched at your words, his expression pained as he reached out to touch your arm, his touch tentative yet filled with hope. "Please, just hear me out," he pleaded, his eyes searching yours for any sign of forgiveness.

But you remained steadfast, refusing to let him see the cracks in your armor. "I don't want to hear your excuses," you snapped, jerking away from his touch. "You made your choice, Theodore. And it wasn't me."

For a moment, silence hung between you like a heavy curtain, the weight of unspoken words filling the space between you. But then, Theo's gaze softened, his voice filled with a quiet determination.

"I know I messed up," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. "But everything I did, I did to protect you. I thought pushing you away would keep you safe, but all it did was break both our hearts."

You felt the walls around your heart begin to crumble, the pain of the past giving way to a flicker of hope. Despite everything, a part of you still longed for the connection you had once shared with Theodore, a love that had never truly died.

"I miss you," he confessed, his voice raw with emotion. "Every day, I wake up wishing I could go back and change things. Wishing I could hold you in my arms again."

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes as you looked up into his eyes, seeing the sincerity and regret reflected back at you. In that moment, you realized that despite everything, you still loved him.

"I never stopped loving you," you whispered, your voice barely audible above the din of the street. "I never could."

Theo’s eyes widened in disbelief, his breath catching in his throat at your admission. For a moment, he seemed at a loss for words, his gaze searching yours for any sign of doubt.

But you held his gaze steady, your heart pounding in your chest as you fought to keep your emotions in check. Despite everything he had put you through, a part of you still longed for the connection you had once shared, a love that had never truly died.

"I'm sorry," Theo whispered, his voice filled with remorse. "I know I don't deserve another chance, but please... please give me the opportunity to make things right."

You hesitated. But unable to look away from his eyes, you saw the depth of his regret, the sincerity of his plea. And in that moment, you knew that you couldn't deny the love you still felt for him. Even if he broke your heart over and over again.

"Okay," you whispered. "I'll give you another chance."

A flicker of hope flashed across his face, his lips twitching into a small smile as he reached out to take your hand in his. In that simple gesture, you felt a sense of warmth and reassurance, a promise of a future filled with second chances and new beginnings.

As you walked together through Diagon Alley, hand in hand, you knew that the road ahead wouldn't be easy. There would be challenges and obstacles to overcome, wounds that still needed healing. But with Theo back by your side, you felt a sense of strength and determination that you hadn't felt in years.

Theo Taglist - @slytherinboysappreciation @dramaticals @urmomsgirlfriend1 @remussbitch @starsval @gillyweeds @hzstry8 @sir-elian @harryslittlebitch @Thatblackthorn @gayforyelena @whoreforfictionalmen18 @Littleraindrops @darkacademicvibes @marauderswhxre @ravenclawprincess33 @sbrn0905 @atadoddinnit @helpimhopelesslyinlove @carav4l @randomgurl2326 @Yhiiil @tristanswildcat @niktwazny303 @themarauderswife7 @moonlightreader649 @sherbysherbsworld @Topguncultleader @chgrch @nat1221 @thestarlithideout @iamaslytherin0 @bath1lda @pinkposttragedy @allshitsangiggles @hoeforvinniehackerrr @mildly-delulu @h3artz4soph @marsbars0

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#theodore nott x y/n #theodore nott x you #theodore nott imagine #theo nott #theodore nott x reader #theo nott imagine #theo nott x reader #theodore nott #teddy #teddy nott #theo #theodore #slytherin x reader #slytherin #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #imagine #writing #mari writes #harry potter fanfiction

[rinzsu]

✩ ‧ ₊˚ IN MEMORIES I HOLD YOU DEAR — GOJO SATORU

four letters you addressed to him slight angst, wc 800+, reader and satoru have feelings for each other but aren’t in a committed relationship, takes place right after the shibuja arc

november 9th, 2018

satoru.

hair white like the first snow, the color of whipped cream, the pots of the plants on my window sills, and the foam atop the oceans waves.

you’ll forever feel like summer to me, like the first of july, when i drowned in your blue eyes and never came back up.

i wish i could kiss you now like i never had before, catch you when you’re falling, and hold you close instead of pushing you away in hopes of forgetting how my heart beats for you and you alone.

it’s ironic, really, how you come back now after all those days and sleepless nights of trying to convince myself that things are better this way, even though you’re so far gone.

i try so hard to forget about you, about us, only for you to barge right back in and for everything to begin anew.

you once said that you hate it when things come to an end, and i still recall how you always used to leave a single chug of sake in your cup instead of finishing it all together.

and how you used to add an “i still have to finish my cup” as an excuse to stay out longer when nanami wanted to leave the bar.

november 16th, 2018

i miss you. it’s been roughly three weeks since you’ve been sealed away, but to me, it feels like three eternities.

winter is creeping up on us, the air is much colder and the sky always grey.

i’m still taking those hot showers in the evening. you used to say that the water feels like warm hugs after an exhausting day, but nowadays i crave your comforting embrace above all.

the academy's halls feel so much emptier with you gone. i used to mock your silly laugh but now i miss it more with every second i spend in this god forsaken place.

it's quiet, and for the first time in what feels like forever, i wish it was more noisy, because that would mean that you are here.

yuji tries keeping his voice low when he talks about you, but it doesn't matter if it's the students, shoko or my treacherous mind that's uttering your name like a useless mantra.

there's so much i couldn't, wouldn't, shouldn't utter out loud, so i'm writing this.

isn't it funny? how i tried to rid you out of my life and now there's a piece of you in every word that i fill these pages with, a fragment of you hidden in each of these lines.

november 24th, 2018

i've been watching our series for the third time now and somehow i feel guilty watching it without you, even though i used to do it all the time when you were still here.

knowing what's about to come soothes my mind even for a little bit. so does going to the drive through and eating chicken nuggets in the parking lot while singing along to all of our songs. i swear by now i can hit higher notes than you ever will.

everyone has their own way of escaping this reality. it helps, makes it hurt less, but just like salve to an open wound, the tranquilizing of this pain will only be temporary until all our sorrows will bleed together again.

is this love?

i see you when it's dark, the illusion of you under one of those flickering street lights. once i turn to look for you, i'm left with your blurring face and the burden of your absence weighing down upon me.

i don't know where life is leading me right now, but there's something that's always pulling me back to you.

december 5th, 2018

you're no longer here.

i've met someone, but he doesn't laugh like you do, doesn't talk to me like you do. it's been less than two weeks but i can already tell that his skin isn't as soft as yours either.

he holds my hand but he doesn't hold it as tight as you do, doesn't intertwine our fingers the way you always did.

when he leaves, he won't make it as difficult for me to say goodbye as you did. and for the first time, i've noticed how different people's presences feel.

how different people breathe, when he rests next to me in shokos office after a mission and i can't feel his rhythm the way i did yours.

was this between us special?

i once heard that after a split up, people tend to romanticize everything bad and to forget why they detached in the first place.

even so, we never dated in the first place and neither did we break up, you just left.

and even though i know that, it's hard for me to believe that i'll ever find someone like you again.

©️ rinsque— do not plagiarise nor repost any of my works on any other platform.

note. hope you enjoyed this <3 i had repost this for the nth time because it didn’t show in the tags i used

#gojo x reader #jjk x reader #gojo satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #gojo x you #gojo satoru x you #gojo imagine #jjk imagine #jujutsu kaisen imagine #satoru gojo x reader #satoru gojo x you #jjk fluff #gojo fluff #gojo satoru fluff #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x you #gojo imagines #satoru x reader #jujutsu kaisen angst #jjk angst #gojo satoru angst #with love..

[moonydustx]

Love me

masterlist | requests here

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Summary: a sudden breakup leaves you questioning what could have happened to Bucky, until you discover he just wanted to keep you safe.

Warnings: a little angst, drama, smut ( p in v, f receiving oral, dirty talk) A lot of tears, but with a happy ending. If I left something out, just let me know.

WC: ~ 3k

A/N: Just an excuse to write about make-up sex with Bucky. No beta, sorry for possible errors as English is not my first language. Also, I'm not used to writing smut, but I hope you like it.

Requests here!

"You need to leave." Bucky asked, without even looking you in the eye.

"What does that mean Buck, did something happen?" you tried to touch him, but Bucky dodged your hands. "What is happening?"

"This mission made me think of many things..." he sat in the kitchen chair, Alpine didn't take long to pass between his legs, waiting for a caress. "I wasn't made for this life, for this." he pointed to the small space between you two.

"Wait, what do you mean?" your voice was already trembling when trying to at least understand what was happening. "Are you breaking up with me? Buck, two days ago everything was perfect, what happened? Please, I need you to explain."

"I already told you, I just..." for a second he looked at your face. The thick tears that ran down your cheeks made him feel his own throat close. He would have a few more reasons to hate himself after that. "I can not do this anymore."

"Is this your best explanation?" you charged and he just shrugged.

The noise of your engagement ring hitting the kitchen table bothered him, but not as much as seeing you walk out the living room door without even looking back. For the first time in a while, it was his turn to allow tears to flood his face.

One month, thirteen days and a few hours.

Maybe it wasn't the healthiest thing in the world to count the dates of the last time you saw your ex, the fateful day he kicked your ass.

You wish you were one of those people that you get over easily, or at least pretend to be by posting happy pictures on social media, but that wouldn't be you.

Your type was more to isolate yourself and drown in your own sorrows, which was also not possible due to work. You had to put on your best social mask and move on, even if you still didn't believe a word Bucky had said.

"Chef, there's a visitor for you." Tyler, one of your employees, caught your eye.

Before he even speaks, you can feel him watching you. Everyone there knew something was wrong.

"How urgent?" you ask with zero atention.

"It's an avenger, so I assume this is the most urgent we've ever had at this restaurant."

The knife in your hand fell onto the board, a chill running through your body. If it was Bucky, Tyler would have told you, after all, your ex-boyfriend had already spent a lot of nights accompanying you to the restaurant. Could be news about him, maybe not good stuff.

"Annya, can you take over for me?" you asked, hearing a "Yes, chef!" by far.

Your mind ran through different scenarios, the vast majority without a happy ending, while you took off your tame and cap.

The weight on your shoulders disappeared when you saw Sam smiling, waiting for you at one of the tables. As soon as he got to his feet, you hugged him.

"I thought I wouldn't have the privilege of seeing the head chef."

"Consider yourself privileged then, because tonight promises." you settled into the chair across from him. Despite the smiles and the mild climate, something told you that there was something more. "So, you came to try the new meat."

"No, not today, but I'm still trying. I'm here to talk about Bucky."

"Did something happen?" your heart immediately sped up, all those fears coming back like a flood.

"It's all right with him." Sam reassured you, noticing your posture change at the time. "I have some information and to be honest I can't stand to see him suffer over it any longer."

"Suffer for what?"

"You, what else would it be?"

"Sam, he chose to leave me. It still hurts, but there's nothing you can do about it." you explained, seeing him nod. "But if there's anything I can help you."

"I'd rather tell you and then you choose what to do. On the last mission, some personal information was leaked. About the team, about Sarah, the boys, you."

"Exactly what about me?"

"About you and Bucky, they used that to try and coerce him, that's what made him choose to walk away from you." he handed you a cell phone.

On the screen, a photo of you and Bucky leaving the restaurant at night, another of the two of you running together, another of you in a coffee shop.

"Who got this? I-I... Are we in danger?" you looked around for suspects, for cameras trained on the two of you, but found only people engrossed in their own conversations. "Who made this?"

"It does not matter now."

"How does it not matter?"

"Bucky sorted it out and whoever it is, they won't be bothering you anymore." Shit. Sam doesn't need to say more for you to understand what resolve means. "I'm only telling you this because I know you still like him."

"It takes two to make a relationship, at the very least." you responded right away.

"Just think, wouldn't someone who did all this thinking about protecting you love you?" Sam asked and laughed when he saw your confused face. "Oh man, you two deserve each other."

"Should I talk to him?"

"Well, he's in town, no plans for the next mission. Maybe you should." Sam shrugged and got to his feet. "Now that I've taken this weight off of me, I'll let you work, but I'll be back and you better cook the best steak I've ever had."

"Order noted." you said goodbye to him with a quick hug. "Thanks Sam."

"Don't thank me, I'm just doing my part as the future best man." he winked, eliciting a laugh from you and then left.

The evening at the restaurant, despite being full, seemed to take forever to pass. Amidst the food, your head wandered over the images you'd seen, what Sam had said.

It was past midnight when you got home. You took a hot shower, somehow trying to calm your mind, but that wasn't enough. Before putting on your pajamas, you thought a little more. You couldn't miss that opportunity, even if it was to close that chapter of your life. You got dressed and headed towards Bucky's apartment.

Your legs made you walk from side to side, restless in front of the door, your mind bubbled with possible excuses for a visit during the night. You knocked a few times and got no response, but you couldn't just walk away.

The keys you still had danced between your trembling fingers before they even reached the lock. Upon opening the door, you can see Alpine look up curiously, immediately jumping off the couch and going to tangle at your feet.

"Hello for you too!" you bent down, feeling the soft white hairs by your hand.

The door behind you closed by itself, giving you only the trouble to lock it again. The small apartment seemed untouched since the last time you were there, you took off your three shoes, leaving them next to Bucky's boots, an old habit.

The same brown cushions as the Alpine ration in the same corner. Your photo still next to the TV. If you closed your eyes, you could remember the day that picture was taken, your nervous laughter being on a Ferris wheel and Bucky's arms around your waist.

You've heard Bucky before you've even seen him in full. The murmurs came from the side of the sofa, and as you feared to find him, he was lying on the floor, only a pillow and a sheet protecting his body from the cold floor. He was muttering something incomprehensible, even from a distance you could see the sweat gather on his face.

Trying to get closer without scaring him, you knelt beside where he was lying, Alpine climbed on the arm of the sofa, carefully following your every move.

"Buck?" you called him in a whisper, not having much effect. This time, you chose to touch his shoulder, shaking it slightly, the nickname involuntarily falling from your lips. "Babe?"

As if out of breath, Bucky sat up, catching all the apparently lost breath. It took a few seconds for his blue irises to meet yours, trying to assimilate what was happening.

"Am I still dreaming?" he muttered to himself, it was only when he felt your hand take his that he seemed to realize reality. "You are here?"

"Yes." you replied, settling into a sitting position.

For a few seconds, you chose to just watch him. The disheveled hair and beard had been undone for some time, a little longer than usual. Next to his military dog ​​tag, hung the ring you wore. Regret took over your body for leaving behind.

"Are you well?" his husky voice interrupted you from daydreaming about the two of you's recent past. Trying to push those thoughts away, you just shook your head and tried to do your best on your own, but you already knew him to know that wouldn't convince him.

"I should be asking that. Was I having a nightmare?"

"Yes... I couldn't sleep and in the little time I could, some demons decided to take the time to disturb me." just as you had, he smiled and just like him, you knew that all was not well. "What are you doing here?"

"Needed to see you." your hand that clung to him let go, busy pinching your own hand nervously. "I've been talking to Sam."

"I don't know what he told you, but I can guarantee..."

"Please let me speak." you cut him off, afraid he would ask you to go again. "I know about the threats, I know about everything and I wonder what your head must be like. But what I want you to understand is that I'm okay with it."

"You do not understand."

"You can help me with this. It may sound silly, but, I don't know, I can learn to defend myself, I can spend more time around you. I just don't accept that our story ends like this, for fear of something that still it didn't even happen. I want to try, I want to stay!" you had to pull yourself together after dumping everything on him.

It could just be your impression, or maybe just the street light streaming in through the window, but you could have sworn his eyes were teary.

His hands pulled yours to lock around the back of his neck. In a rush of courage, you crossed your legs over his, settling in his lap. His hands slid down your back, locking onto your waist.

"Say you don't want me, that you don't love me anymore and I'm gone." you whispered and he immediately denied it.

"They said your name, they talked about you, about us and I didn't know how to react." he closed his eyes for a moment, sighing as he felt your fingers tangle in his hair. "I don't think I've ever felt that… that fear. I thought it would be easier to walk away than stick around and let them hurt you. But shit, it hurt. It still hurts not to have you around."

"If you want, I can stay away, just ask, I understand. I just need you to be honest." His hands, previously tied around your waist, went up to your face, wiping away a few tears. "Now if I stay, we'll get through this together. Please..." your voice came out a lot lower than you expected. "Ask me to stay, tell me you still love me."

Your current self was waiting for an answer, yearning to hear those damn three words. Your now self didn't have a shred of regret. If at any time you dared to rethink what had been said, that was left behind when you felt his lips on yours.

His right hand tangled in your hair, deepening his lips on you, while the other kept you attached to him, squeezing your waist. His tongue drew the roof of your mouth, such a good and familiar feeling. God, how you missed that.

"I love you." Bucky's voice murmured, moving just a few millimeters from your lips. "I love you." he stole another kiss, this time even more intense. "I love you, every bit, every part." the kisses began to go down the back of your neck, reaching that part that shivered your entire body.

"Bucky, please."

"Let me love every piece of you, please doll." he asked, letting his tongue run up to the edge of your ear. "Fuck, let me show you that I haven't stopped loving you for a second."

"You have no idea how much I've missed you babe." you whispered, pressing your still covered intimacy against him.

Heat was starting to build up in your core, making it impossible to think. His lips pulled away from yours, only for in a single thrust, he'd jump to his feet and keep you locked in his arms. It didn't take long for you to feel your body against the soft fabric of the bed. Bucky took a little time to admire you, there again. The red eyes, the shy smile that was still there, even after so long.

"I missed you so much, here, in my bed, being all mine" his eyes asked permission to continue and a slight nod was enough for your pants and your blouse to find the bedroom floor.

His metallic hand ran over your shoulder, gently removing your bra, with each new piece of skin uncovered, you felt his lips deposit quick kisses, the urgency to be able to feel each piece of yours.

"Do not tease me." you asked when his lips touched your nipple. The tongue circling the protruding point, eliciting a timid groan from you.

"You are so sensitive, so good." the wet kisses descended towards your intimacy, touching with the lips the thin and humid fabric that prevented it from going exactly where you wanted.

You even tried to fight back, but even strangled, Bucky could hear you.

"Don't hold back, babe." he pulled the fabric off, tossing it along with the pile of clothes on the floor. Distracted lips, sliding down your thigh. "Let me hear you."

"It's dawn Buck, I don't want them to think... Fuck!" his tongue went straight to your clitoris, eliciting a muffled scream.

"What you saying." he pulled back a little, just to admire her intimacy. "All this for me?"

"It's how I missed you." Bucky dove into your intimacy, sucking your spot.

You could already feel your body about to boil. His tongue slowly circling your clit, while one of his fingers slowly entered your pussy, soon becoming two.

Sweet nothings came out of your lips, begging for something you didn't even recognize and it didn't take long for your vision to become blurred when you felt his tongue being replaced by the vibranium hand, the fingers cold as snow in contact with your clit were more than enough to reach your peak.

"Don't stop, please, please Bucky!"

"Give it to me honey, I know you want to come for me."

For a few seconds, amid an almost hoarse scream, your previously blurred vision disappeared for good. Your legs were shaking as you felt him settle between them. The lips still wet from your juice slid down your cheek, making you blink slowly.

"Still with me doll?"

"Yeah babe." you took his lips, tasting your own and giving him the freedom he needed to enter you.

He thrust slowly, Bucky's face hid in your neck as he moaned low, murmuring sweet nothings to you. So tight love. How I missed this pussy, made for me. You are mine, all mine.

The speed gradually increased, the headboard of the bed knocked insistently against the wall and you just hoped that the neighbors had a heavy sleep.

"Love, I can't hold it anymore." his hand went down to your clit, circling the most sensitive spot on your body. "I can sense that you can't either."

"Just like that Bucky, keep fucking like that." you begged, feeling the heat take over your body again.

"Come with me my angel. I can feel you tighten around me, give me one more, just one more."

The moans of both of you came out in unison and leaving you on the verge of an orgasm, it was only necessary to feel his hot liquid invade you to reach your own peak.

Bucky stayed in there for a few seconds, until he got out of you and turned you on top of him, hugging you tight and sticking his nose through your hair. Your scent was intoxicating, your body against his made him feel again that that cold apartment was home.

"You forgive me?" the hesitant tone of his voice caught your attention.

"Nothing to forgive" you settled on his chest. "Just promise never to leave me for that again?"

He gently pulled your face, making you look into his blue eyes. "I'll never, never leave you again, that's the easiest promise I've ever made in my life."

"I love you Buck."

"I love you more my angel." you snuggled into his chest and little by little your eyes grew heavy, his hands sliding on your back, in a comfortable silence.

The last thing she heard before falling asleep was an indignant tone in his voice.

"Wait, do you really want to learn how to fight?"

#fiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #reader insert #bucky x you #no use of y/n #sebastian stan #sam wilson

[tojifile]

Dazai Osamu: Sake

“This sake or your love?” -Itchyworms

Genre: Angst // drunk!Dazai x gn!reader

⚠️: Toxic relationship

A/N: Sorry for not posting for a while, I haven't had any new ideas and I can't think of how to start with your reqs but nevertheless if you have any scenarios my reqs are open, just wait for me to have that sudden inspiration.

LINK: Masterlist

It was a cold and rough night. Dazai was drinking bottle after bottle, drowning his sorrows in the fruity taste of sake.

After a long day you found him laying on the couch with empty bottles of sake scattered around him, as if it were an elaborate trap. You stood by the entrance of your shared apartment, closing the door behind you as spoke with a worried tone "Osamu.. drinking? Again?"

Dazai waved his hand at you as if it weren't a big deal. "It's only a few bottles, don't make it a problem in your book." He spoke without a care in the world. "It's a problem in everyone's book but unfortunately, not in yours." You shot back. At this point you were used to his drinking but you still made it a point to take care of him and help him get better rather than enable his self-destructive habits.

"Well like you said, it's not a problem in my book so why do you act like it's a problem for you?!" He retorted, his tone seemed much more annoyed now. He sat up from the couch and narrowed his eyes at you.

You walked towards him, carefully walking past the bottles of sake laying round and about. You bent down in front of him to meet his gaze. "Osamu.. don't turn this into an argument, please just stop drinking, it isn't healthy." You held his hand gently as you spoke.

He looked at you with an annoyed expression and took his hand back from your gentle grasp "I'm turning it into an argument?! You're the one making it seem like it's a problem for you!!" He yelled, you suddenly stood back up and looked down at him angrily. "It is my problem too!! Who the hell do you think cleans your mess up?! Who do you think bathes you when you throw up?! Who do you think help you climb into bed when you're too drunk to do it yourself?!" You snapped, finally letting out the pent up frustration inside you.

"No one fucking told you to do all that!! You did that by yourself!! You brought it all upon yourself!! Why even put up with me if you don't like it?! You're the one to blame for your own problems!!" He retorted angrily. "Because that's what you do when you care about someone. I 'put up' with your bullshit because hurt people, hurt people. But you—you're dancing on the line I've set between us." You quickly spat.

"Then just fucking leave me if being with me is so hard!!" He exclaimed angrily as he shot you a glare. "Fine!! Take your time to choose between me and your precious sake!!" You yelled back, you walked back to the doorway and slammed the door shut and walked away without another word.

"Fuck.. fuck.." Dazai muttered to himself. He couldn't believe what just happened. You had never done that, usually you'd hold him tight and apologize—but this was different. "What the hell did I just do.."

You walked through the streets of Yokohama with an arrow through your heart. You didn't know whether to stay and help him the next day or leave and never return. You knew he only said those words because he's drunk but you also knew that you shouldn't excuse such words and actions.

After an hour you came back to the apartment, the lights were off and Dazai was on the couch, hugging a pillow tightly. You sighed, knowing that you'll come back to him in each and every argument.

You went up to him, got on your knees and sat on the floor near his face. You looked at him fondly with a soft and caring smile on your face while you gently swept stray hairs that covered his face. "I'm sorry.." he mumbled. You didn't answer him, you only caressed his cheek gently.

It seemed like he chose you—at least that's what you thought. In his mind he was still thinking about which he loved more, you or sake?

Spontaneous post: 07/02/23 12:35PM GMT+8 Philippine Standard Time

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs headcanons #dazai osamu #bungo stray dogs #osamu dazai #angst #dazai x reader #dazai #osamu #dazai x gn!reader

[karolamurdock]

SpiderWoman 2099 Pt.4

Miguel O'Hara x Spider!Reader

Sinopsis: The year is 2106. By day, you work as the head of the Genetic Engineering and Biotechnology division at Alchemax. By night, you are the one and only Spider-Woman, fighting tirelessly to protect New York from the tyrannical clutches of crime and delinquency. Your days are spent in an ordinary, organized routine: it's just you, the only barrier between your city and oblivion, dealing with the violence and pain that comes with being a superhero.

Everything is just normal. Then your dead husband appears in front of you, talking about alternate universes, spider societies and canonical disasters, and you discover that all your sorrows, losses and failures were possibly always meant to happen.

What the fuck.

Notes: No excuses. Let this chapter, full of Miguel, make up for the long time I was gone. I will keep the reader's background rather ambiguous, but it is implied that they also speaks Spanish.

If you want to be added to the taglist, let me know.

Warnings: Intrusive thoughts, mild violence, subtle references to depression. As always, english is not my first lenguague.

Word count: 2.6K

Pt 1 - Pt 2 - Pt 3 - Pt 4

Impassive white eyes stared back at you with disdain. You looked with abject curiosity at the spidery pattern on his red suit, the white glasses and the sharp claws, and you couldn't help but wonder...

Who makes a spider suit for a cat? 

Undaunted, the animal yawned loudly and stretched lazily over the railing before leaping onto the pristine marble floor, completely silent and oblivious to your anomalous presence. He waved his orange tail and stretched the red patterns that hugged his hind legs.

You did not have the opportunity to entertain yourself with her pretty pink pads. A gloved hand brushed your shoulder, and you turned your masked face to observe your guide's own grim expression.    

"Come with me." Miguel said. "I'll show you around before introducing you to the rest of Society."

Silently, you nodded. The man walked two steps ahead of you. His broad, imposing figure was like a bronze spur, parting the sea of arachnid entities that watched you with open curiosity. 

As he made his way through the crowd, you quietly followed in his footsteps. Grateful for the foresight to keep your mask in place, you analyzed the discordant structure of the building that surrounded you. You noticed the long corridors and open configuration: designed to facilitate mobility for your kind. 

Miguel moved forward, and you watched his impassive figure with stern eyes. You wondered if he too had become Orpheus in his willingness to claim you back, and now feared to look back and lose his Eurydice. Perhaps the anguish in his gaze would be enough to draw you into the shadows and lose you forever. Would he then be blessed to work and move the gods with craftsmanship born of his terrible grief?

Was it so for you? You could not claim that your deeds after his death were unselfish and sincere: you did not seek to soften the wind with your tender weeping, nor to drown the rushing waters with the song of your heroic prowess. The resolution of your vengeance was your reward: an analgesic balm to numb the turmoil of your burning soul. 

Together, you entered the lift... You watched the changing landscape. On the glass, you saw Miguel's ponderous silhouette, stern and rigid. The pattern of his suit resembled your own. But your own profile was outlined with sharper lines, and your web shooters were not exposed, but hidden in the webbing patterns on your wrists.

The door opened, and you followed him through large, well-lit rooms, through huge recreation rooms, and through small, immaculate, familiar laboratories. You carefully analyzed the information he gave you along the way: where to find the scientists in charge of certain labs, the optimum hours for accessing the training rooms, the menu in the main cafeteria (a burger with Miguel's mask on it? Santo Dios...). Finally, he took you to his own office. On one of the top floors, of course. Just like your universe. 

When the lift stopped in his office, your mask retracted. Miguel did a quick double take, pursed his lips and looked up; you followed his gaze to see a red light flashing rapidly on one of the screens above the platform. 

You heard Miguel's grunt as Lyla appeared over his shoulder, giving you a quick wink before turning to face the man:

"An anomaly is causing trouble on Earth-1048. Homeworld Spider-Man is already on the scene, but he's limited to minimizing the destruction around him."

"Copy that." Miguel said. He ran a hand over his face, holding the bridge of his nose as he squeezed his eyes shut, and the gesture seemed so familiar that you almost let out the breath you were holding between your lips. "I have to deal with this. I'll talk to Jessica, she can show you the room you can use as your own."

"I can go with you." You finally spoke.

Miguel looked at you in surprise. But he quickly frowned and replied:

"No, it's too soon. I'll be able to show you how we deal with the anomalies once you're settled in and we know more about your universe."

Your universe. Like a wave crashing against rock, you felt heat coursing through your veins and burning in the pit of your stomach. You felt that in your rage, the marks on your suit might be burned into your skin forever. 

You blinked. Ignoring the fire in your chest, you responded:

"I could settle in better if I knew what I was dealing with." 

Miguel studied you. His red eyes scanned your face: your steel eyes, your unbending brows, your closed lips, and he said no more. Sharing a last look with Lyla, he nodded with finality, and she took it upon herself to open the portal for the two of you. 

"Let 's go, then."

🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷

It was a cold morning in Harlem. The white sky barely hinted at the day's pale rays, and the streets were shrouded in a thick, damp gray haze. As you and Miguel landed on a lamppost overlooking the East River and the small buildings lining the street, an ominous silence settled over the scene at your feet. 

You sat back on your heels, scanning the nondescript landscape, and Miguel followed, his back stiff and his hands clenched into fists as he exhaled:

"The signal seems to be coming from this warehouse." He gestured with his chin, and you peered intently at the gray silhouette of a building surrounded by tall grills and long containers. A cloud of gray smoke rose through the haze, and with a mighty leap you launched yourself in its direction, hearing Miguel's nets snap past you.

Soon you were perched on the railing of a neighboring building, with a clear view of the ruined courtyard. Sparks rained down from the ruined batteries; small fires burned and cracks in the concrete marred the once peaceful scene.

Rubble crunched beneath your feet as you landed in the courtyard. In the distance, you heard a muffled, heavy thud. You glanced cautiously at a large metal curtain to your right as a deafening screech pierced the jealous silence. Beside you, Miguel brought his knees to his chest and the two of you jumped away just as the door shot in your direction. 

A red figure flew through the air. With a start, you threw your nets around the man's torso, jumping just in time to catch him before his body slammed into a large metal container. 

"Nice catch." Gasped the Spider-Man in your arms. "Rhino's got an arm."

"Does he throw you often?" 

"Well, yeah." The young man cleared his throat, pulling himself to his feet with a little help. "But I don't usually get caught by..." He tilted his head to the side, curious.

"Spider-Woman." You conceded. 

Her white glasses widened comically as he whistled under his breath: 

"Awesome!"

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Miguel's orange nets wrapped around Rhino's massive arm, and you spun on your heels as the beast slammed into the tower Miguel was standing on.

"He's really mad!" Spider-Man exhaled as he rushed to your side. "I don't understand, according to my intel, Aleksei's transfer still hasn't been coordinated. He is still in the custody of the police."

"He's not Aleksei Sytsevich!" Miguel shouted. He had dodged a large stone and landed next to you. "His name is Alexander O'Hirn. He is the Rhino of dimension 26496." 

"Oh!" Spider-Man exclaimed. "I knew you weren't my Rhino! We've always had this connection, you know?" 

The man lunged at you, furious. You caught a glimpse of a crane with a container suspended in the air, and you pulled the arm of the crane just as the man was passing underneath the box. The container landed on top of his armour with a clatter that made your ears ring. 

"Watch out!" 

A strong arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you out of the way of a huge chunk of concrete.

"Not one, but three Spider-Creeps!" he growled.

"Hey, that's not very nice of you." Spider-Man landed a kick to the chest, but Rhino didn't move. He grabbed the hero's legs and slammed him into the wreckage of the crane. Taking advantage of the distraction, Miguel jumped up and punched him in the face, the only exposed part of his body.

Rhino let go of Spider-Man and took a step back. With a leap, you stood on a low beam and surveyed your surroundings. As the man jerked and rammed into Miguel, you activated your drones; small winged spiders that flew over the villain's head, firing electric shocks that immobilised him with a scream.

"His face!" you exclaimed, and Miguel leapt to your side to dodge the rocks Rhino dropped as he stomped on the concrete. 

Spider-Man, snapping out of his daze, noticed the same thing you did: the small visible part of his face was hyperemic and sweaty. "His suit must be restricting his ventilation!"

So this would be a battle of endurance. Good, you thought to yourself. You've been doing this for years. 

With a nod, Miguel and Spider-Man squared up firmly and jumped into the fray.

🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷 🕷

As the portal to your dimension closed behind you, silence fell. Michael's gaze was on the horizon, and yours was on him. It was not his red eyes that you caressed with your thoughts, but you could taste the sweetness of his cheek beneath your lips. His hair was shorter, but his curly eyelashes were thicker than yours: a feature that made you playfully envious in the past.

In the warm, brief light of the streetlamps, his face was just as beautiful. His bronze skin was a ghostly contrast to the impassivity of the bustling nightlife, a backdrop to his stern profile. 

He looked at you too. And his pupils wandered over the arch of your lips, your eyebrows and cheekbones, the slope of your neck and your bare ears. And you thought he was reflecting the same doubt that plagued you: because he is Miguel, but not your Miguel. And you were never his wife, but your smile is the same, and he only replaced your name with silence, and the space he occupied with you was filled with melancholy.

"You did a good job." Miguel said after a prolonged silence. 

"Thank you." You replied with a small smile. "You weren't so bad yourself."

"Hm." He snorted. With a hand on his hip, he arched an eyebrow and looked you up and down, half mocking, half stern. "Now you know what we're up against. You can run away now. We won't blame you. I certainly wouldn't."

You moistened your lips and took a slow breath. So close, your arm inches from his shoulder, you felt his warmth, the energy of his holographic suit, his solid build and musky scent. 

"You wouldn't reach me." You finally replied, and your heart skipped a beat as a grin revealed his sharp fangs. 

"I already did."

"I was distracted."

"Sure." 

He straightened up, and you took advantage of the brief appraisal that he was giving to the red horizon to revel in his presence... just one more time. 

In your solitude, his face is your guest. With his presence, an outdated image shatters beneath your feet. This new precision is yours. And even if he were to leave you that night, his voice muffled by the wind, Miguel would not leave you. His eyes would remain in the burning sunset and his posture in the steadiness of the stars. 

When he looked back at you, your expression was already composed. Silently, you tilted your chin in the direction of the busy streets, and when he raised a questioning eyebrow, you spread your arms wide and threw yourself into the void. 

Your mask returned to your face and your wings spread from your arms. Behind you you heard a faint scream and a short curse in Spanish. You felt, before you saw, his broad, imposing figure leaping from the edge of the building, and you used the air currents to move across the city with ease.

The buildings blurred at the edge of your vision. Though your mask filtered out the piercing whistle of the air, you still felt the pressure in your ears; and you didn't look at him, but felt his presence, imagining him dodging antennas, aerial surveillance and flocks of birds skimming skilfully across the crowded sky. 

You locked arms and landed in a somersault, legs cramped and right hand braced against one of the buildings, halfway across a complex of tall glass towers.

"Look." 

Below you, the city lit up like fireflies in the night. Thirteen hundred feet away, the cars and streetlights looked like tiny fiery wisps traversing the busy, colorful streets. And in the distance, the black silhouette of Alchemax stood out against the red horizon.

"I recognise this place." Miguel said, leaning over to stare in awe at a small purple-roofed shop on the side of the road. "It used to be a very popular artisan bakery in my universe." 

"It's quite popular here too."

"I still have fond memories of their vanilla cake. I would get it for all... my events." He finished lowly.

"I used to buy the orange bread," you hummed understandingly, shaking your head disappointedly. "And now I can't eat citrus."

He looked at you in silence... and then laughed, shaking his head in astonishment, "Neither can I."

In the privacy of your mask, you smiled back. And with the first dark brushstroke on the horizon came your resolution. 

"I can help you." You began, looking away from the night to stare at his cloaked profile. "But I will not be part of the Society."

He bowed his head, listening.

"I have work to do here." Your work at Alchemax; the company you were leading was just beginning to take a course that you could be proud of. Being Spider-Woman; a full-time job you couldn't give up: you were already the symbol of your city. An embodiment of hope, perseverance and goodness. "But... I understand that your work with the multiverse is an even more arduous and complex task, and I offer you my services as an advisor. If you ever need help... you know where to find me."

A hero must be impartial. And to you... his mere presence would be a constant challenge, an exercise in moral skill tested in the crucible of your everyday life. How could you not choose him? The strange man with your husband's voice. The friend whom you love the most, the one who lives in the moments of your delirium. 

Because, after him, living seems distant. You have no anger left... only pain. And although your better judgment led you not to get involved with the Society, you could not find the strength within yourself to ignore him. Even though this Miguel is not yours, letting him go is almost like losing him again.

His mask pulled back and you watched him run a hand through his hair, tousling his auburn locks as he nodded slowly. 

"I understand." 

He stood to his feet. He held out a hand to you, and you followed as he took one last, searching look over your city.

He opened his mouth, then closed it. He seemed to hesitate for a moment. He gave you a long look, and in the end he just said:

"Then I'm counting on you." 

You remained standing, staring at his silhouette, even as the portal swallowed his dark figure.

"What have I just gotten myself into?" you whispered into the empty air.

@alicefallsintotherabbithole @digipaw2-0 @sunshowernaps @qiaipia @luciiferian @saltyllamakidwombat @amnmich @autismsupermusicalassassin @miggyyyyohara @oscarissac2099 @songbirdlully

#marvel #miguel o'hara #atvs #miguel o'hara x oc #miguel o'hara x reader #spider man: across the spider verse #across the spiderverse #into the spider verse #oscar isaac #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara x y/n #spiderman atsv #spiderman 2099 #spiderman #itsv #spiderman itsv

[tragedyofdevotion]

The fair lady

The fair lady has passed away. That information reached in the ears of even someone like you who was tucked away in this mansion for many years. You felt heartbroken when you first overheard the news from the maids. Rosalyne was a mesmerizing lady just as her code name implies. And surprisingly, she has was very kind and gentle with you in the rare times that you have met her. Even though you have never leave a foot out of this mansion after your marriage, you have known the stories from all around Teyvat due to the letters she sent without your husband knowing. You never saw her side where people fear and shake in terror. The Rose you knew was one without thorns, sweet and kind and loving. And your husband once said that she probably turns back to the Rosalyne-Kruzchka Lohefalter before she faced the tragedy. However, you have no idea why this change occurred. You were planning to ask her if there is a chance but now… you will never know the answer. When you are drowning in sorrow for your friend’s sudden departure, you heard someone knocked the door. So, you quickly wiped away your tears and calmed yourself down. You cannot let anyone, especially the maids, know you shed tears for La Signora because they will no doubt report it back to your husband. “The lord is coming back. I was told to inform you.”

“Huh? Why so soon? Normally he is always so busy at the bank until it was midnight. It is only noon, isn’t it?”

“Haven’t you heard the announcement, my lady?”

“What announcement?”

The maid looked exasperated for a second before changing her face into neutral look again.

“Every work in Snezhnaya is to be stopped for half a day in honor of the harbinger, La Signora.

Well then. If you will excuse me.”

She left as abruptly as she came.

It is clear to see that the maids and the butlers in this mansion does not favor you. In their eyes, you were someone who married the lord only because of money and still had the audacity to be ungrateful to him. Well, it is true that your parents did not think twice about selling you out to the richest man in Snezhnaya when their company went bankrupt. However, in the back of your mind, you know that even that bankruptcy was orchestrated by your now husband.

In your defense, you tried your best for things to not turn out this way.

You warned your parents not to trust the smiling man too much. You advised them not to invest too much in that project. You ventilated them to live contentedly by opening a bakery or something even after you lost all of your wealth. However, your words held no power over them as your family is as prideful as they are shortsighted.

On the other hand, it can be said that your husband value your opinion and view on various issues. Except for your wish for freedom that is. Otherwise, there is no way he would confide you about the deepest secrets Teyvat has in hold. Maybe that is why he was interested in you in the first place. You are kind but not naïve. Being born in the higher society, you know how wicked a human being can be and you can hold your ground against their scheme, sometimes going as far as to revenge them. But you still had your inner child and your pure eyes that glitter with delight at everyday things. It was irony in a sense that you held power in decision that can change the country and even the whole Teyvat yet cannot say a word in the decision of your own life.

“What have you been thinking so deeply that you did not notice your husband coming back, darling? I thought I made sure you were informed.” He said, smiling the same charming and creepy smile that he always adorned.

“I am not sure. Maybe I am thinking about running away from you.” You answered pointedly.

“Well then, I guess you are doing well. I thought you would be more devastated considering your girlfriend died recently.”

“What do you mean my girlfriend? Wait? You knew about the letters?!”

“Of course, I did. I can’t manage the northern bank if I am an ignorant man who doesn’t even know what is going on in his own house. I just pretended not to know because the content of your letters were innocent enough. Also, unlike your ex-boyfriend’s case, I wasn’t able to move carelessly considering she is a fellow harbinger. So, I am really grateful that the Raiden did the job for me.”

“You heartless ***!!! She was your comrade!”

“Weren’t you taught that a respectable lady shouldn’t say such vile words? And who is the heartless one? Are you sure you don’t notice what she had done in Inazuma?”

“Whatever she did, she did it for our country. She did it in the name of Tsaritsa. Moreover, whatever she did, she did not imprison a girl and treat her as her prized doll. Maybe you shouldn’t do vile things if you don’t want vile words to come out of my mouth.”

“Are you sure you should be saying things like that?” He slammed you against the wall and put his hands around your frame, effectively caging you between his body and the wall. “Your red knight, the only one who had a chance of saving you from the big bad monster is off dead, you know? Do I also need to remind you that it was your own parents who sold you to this devil. No matter how heartless they are, I am sure you wouldn’t want them to die of hunger in the cold nights of Snezhnaya mountains.”

Yes. He is right. All the luxury your parents are living in now is his. You hate to admit it but he actually bought you off so you are rightfully his, just like his various treasures. You were so shaken by your one true friend’s death that you let it slip off your mind.

“No. I am sorry, Pantalone-sama. Please forgive me.” It took every ounce of your muscles to vocalize those words.

“I understand, my dear. You were just so shocked by Signora’s death, right? I will forgive you THIS TIME. In exchange you have to promise me – no more pen pals, ok? I can’t be sure I will be as patient the next time.” He threatened, using the tone a teacher soothing an elementary kid and you hated it. But what you hated more was his smile, that damn smile that is never leaving his face. You wished you could ripe it off.

But you said what is the polar opposite of your mind.

“Thank you for your benevolence, Pantalone-sama.”

A drop of tear escaped your eye and you only noticed it when it wet your cheeks.

You didn’t have time to figure out whether it is for your friend or for yourself as the Regrator in front of you quickly wiped it away.

#yandere genshin impact #yandere genshin x reader #yandere regrator #yandere patalone #yandere pantalone x reader #yandere regrator x reader #signora x reader #yandere patalone x y/n #yandere pantalone x you #yandere harbinger #pantalone x reader #pantalone x you #regrator x reader #regrator x you #I wrote

[thewritetofreespeech]

Could I request Kazuki, Rei, and Kyutarou with a super sweet s/o losing it when she hears someone badmouthing or hurting them?

Buddy Daddy Boys + Protective S/O

Kazuki

He was too good natured for his own good sometimes.

Sure he’s a contract killer, but he wants to see the good in people too. Give them the benefit of the doubt. When someone is being rude or mean to him, he just tries to brush it off and keep going.

Which is a little hard to do when someone has his collar in their fist.

“Come on man. Relax. It’s just a game.”

“You owe me money!” The hulk of a man yelled in his face, as he demanded the money back from the bet he just lost. And for some reason blamed Kazuki for.

“I can’t really give you any money if you’re holding me here. Plus, I just lost all my cash too. Why don’t we use my last buck to grab a beer and drown our sorrows.”

“I don’t want a beer!” The blonde’s natural charms not working on him. “I want my money! Either you give it to me or I’m gonna take it out on your face.”

‘Aw geez….’ He really didn’t want to resort to violence in his favorite casino. He’d like to come back some day.

“Hey!” The two men look over the hulk’s shoulder at s/o standing there. “Put him down now.”

The man growled. “Or what?!”

“Or you’re about to feel what 800 volts feels like on your asshole.” An ominous chatter from their pocket taser, poised just at the brute’s backside, sounded. Letting him know that he might get one hit, but he wasn’t going to get another.

The man grit his teeth, realizing he’d rather not get intimate with their taser, and roughly let Kazuki down before stalking off. “You really didn’t have to do that.”

“Yes I did.” S/O argued. “You refuse to stand up for yourself. So I have to do it for you.”

“By threatening a man with a taser?”

“When the situation allows.” Kazuki smirked at their reply as they put the taser away. “Let’s go. I think your luck has run dry.”

“Yeah sure.” He agreed. And for once, left before he was completely penniless this time.

Rei

Unlike Kazuki, Rei never sees the good in people.

He always assumes that people are selfish, horrible, mean bastards who are only out for themselves. His childhood taught him that.

Because of this he’s never surprised when people act bad or cruelly to him. He just takes it and keeps it in before letting it go. His childhood taught him that too.

“Excuse me.” Rei glanced to his left when he realized [Y/N] was standing there. Her face scrunch in a fussy brow as they confronted the laughing group of teens that just cut in front of him. “The line is back that way.”

“Oh come on.” One of the teens replied, shrugging them off. “It’s not a big deal. We’ll all get to the front of the line eventually. No reason to make a scene.”

“But….controller…..” Rei muttered under his breath. There were two things that would willingly get him out of the house for the day: work and the release of the new Morio Kart: Race Across the Universe game. To promote it, the store was also giving away a commemorative controller with each new game purchaser for the first 100 buyers. Rei had gotten up early and been standing in line all day for the sale to start. Only to have these kids jump the line and mess up his precise count.

“There won’t be a scene if you just go to the back of the line.” [Y/N] told them.

“Ugh. God. Chill out ok. I’m just getting this stupid new game for my brother. We were just late because we were studying for finals. Our education is important.” The one and only girl in the pack whined.

“And yet you haven’t learned anything.”

The girl, with way too much makeup on in Rei’s opinion, frowned; making the creases in her makeup worse. “Listen, lady. I need to get this game for my kid brother or my parents will be pissed. Besides, aren’t you a little old to be interested in games like this?”

“Are you a little old to not know how lines work? Or color matching for that matter?”

The girl looked ready to boil, but then stormed off in a huff instead. The boys, who apparently were as dumb as they looked, didn’t know what to do so they just took off after her. Getting out of the line and letting Rei resume his properly counted place. “Thank you.”

“For what? I just can’t stand rude people.” Still, Rei smiled just a little at her and the line continued.

They each bought a copy of the game. Rei promised to pay her back, but he really wanted two controllers for him and Miri. Of course, [Y/N] couldn’t say no. “Next time someone cuts in front of you in line, why don’t you hip check them into the bushes.”

“My hips aren’t big enough for that.”

Kyutarou

Owning a bar was a lot of work. People often stayed away, since it was more off the beaten path, but every now and then he’d get a crowd looking for that and be packed. Kyutaro tried his best to maintain, as the only bartender, and was very grateful he had a supportive significant other willing to pitch in and play waitress when need be.

“Hey! Barkeep! More beer!”

Kyutaro sighed as he settled up the tab of one of the customers, before going over to the drunk patron at the end of the bar. “I think you’ve had enough sir. Why don’t I get you a complimentary coffee while I settle your bill.”

“Coffee?? Who the hell wants coffee? I drink enough of that crap at work.” The drunk pounded down what was left in his glass and slammed it down on the bar. “If off the clock. I want beer!”

“I’m not giving you anymore.”

The bar fly glared at him (or as much as they could with how drunk they were). “Listen four-eyes!” Kyutaro was taken aback. Not only was it rude, but no one had called him ‘four eyes’ since grade 3. “I said I want more beer and you’re gonna give it to me! I got money. You got beer. What’s the problem?!”

“Besides you’re completely sauced?”

The men look up at [Y/N]. Tray of empty glassware in one hand and the other on her hip. “Come on man. Time to call it a night before this gets any uglier. You’re not gonna talk to the owner like that.”

“Oh yeah?!” The man tried to get up off his bar stool. He did, but with legs about as shaky as a new born deer. “I’ll…talk to whoever I want however I want. You’re not gonna stop me!”

[Y/N] huffed and sat their tray down. “Look,” she told him, “either you can leave on your feet or leave on your ass. Pay your bill like a man and go. Otherwise, I’m gonna throw you out of here like a cartoon character. Ever literally been thrown out of a bar? There’s no coming back from that.”

Despite his brain being pickled, the man seemed to realize that this wasn’t a good idea and surrendered. Although loudly as he continued to grumble as he pulled out some cash, threw it on the bar, and wobbled his way out. “Think he’ll be ok?”

“Who cares?” [Y/N] replied as they counted out the bills. “After that four-eyes crack he can getbuddy his by a cab for all I know.”

“That’s rather cruel.” Despite this, Kyutaro still chuckled at the remark.

“So,” [Y/N] said as they looked up at him through their lashes. “I like your glasses. He shouldn’t have made fun of them.”

Kyutaro smirked and started cleaning the glasses she’d just brought over. “Well, thank you. And thank you for your help.”

#;ask and ye shall receive (request answers) #rei suwa #rei suwa x reader #kazuki kurusu x reader #kurusu kazuki #kyutaro kugi #buddy daddies kyutaro #kyutaro kugi x reader #buddy daddies scenarios #buddy daddies imagine #scenarios #imagine #buddy daddies

[lilyoffandoms]

Hey there! No pressure to do this, but if you want to indulge me... it could be a scene, quick dialogue, or a full fic if you wish (or you can toss this! lol)

AU where Gabirel and Trystan meet for the first time at a bar after both of their blind dates stood them up.

Crimes Drabble AU - Trystan x Gabriel

Warning & A/N: None other than drinking. Decided to write in the style I’ve come to for this book/pairing. Thanks much for this. It was fun!

Quote edit by the lovely @aallotarenunelma

I look out across the crowded pub.

Stuffed to the brim.

Across the room, sweaty bodies grind against their dance partner and everyone else on the packed floor as music pumps from the speakers of some wanna be deejay that the bartender’s brother’s cousin’s neighbor probably convinced the manager to hire on for the night.

The tables in the back of the place that constitutes the restaurant portion this bar slash wanna be pub, are full of couples feeding french fries to each other and groups of raucous friends laughing over some stupid joke told every time they go out together.

Each seat at the rail is occupied by a mix of drunks drowning their sorrows. Or drunks hoping beyond hope that the answer to all their troubles is at the bottom of their next glass. Or drunks hitting on the poor soul next to them, spewing some cheap pick up line that never works but maybe it will this time, they think, if only the person they use it on is drunk enough to find it endearing through the filter of all the alcohol.

I knew I shouldn’t have bothered tonight. It felt wrong the minute I said sure, why not.

Why fucking not indeed, I had thought in the moment. Ruby wouldn’t set me up with anyone she didn’t think I’d hit it off with. She convinced me and I convinced myself that it would be good for me.

I toss the last contents of my glass back and look for one of bartenders. One mixing drinks, another restocking, and yet another flirting for tips.

Well, this, this right here was why fucking not. A text promising to make it up to me and reschedule soon.

I’ve met enough people, hell I’ve interrogated enough people to recognize a lie when I see one.

I attempt to flag the bartender down again. Any of them. I just want another drink.

I look down into my empty glass. Maybe it can tell me why I was this stupid. Stupid enough to accept his blind date set up and even more stupid to actually show up.

The promise of love was really just one disappointment after another.

I try to wave anyone down at this point. I need another damn drink because this empty one is providing me no answers.

What a fucking joke!

I stand on the rail and glance over the bar that at one time was polished. I see the bottle I’m looking for and stretch out to reach it while trying desperately to avoid touching the sticky bar.

“Here,” an accented voice smiles as a hand reaches beyond my own grasp to snag the bottle and pours me another glass in one incredibly fluid motion.

The woman next to me, that the stranger has reached around, doesn’t seem the least bit annoyed by this person pouring drinks across her own space at the bar. In fact, she seems quite please with the entire situation as she smiles stupidly at my bartending savior.

She lifts her glass to him and he obliges in pouring her another drink with a dashing smile and some flirty words judging by the blush that creeps down her neck to engulf not only her cheeks but her entire chest on full display.

I shake my head and grin at the exchange. I should have known this blind date was a horrific idea the minute my date suggested this place.

This is so not my scene.

“Thanks,” I mumble absentmindedly, sure that he’s moved on to entertain the woman beside me.

I take a sip and close my eyes wishing I was back home as the man shoves his way past her, making his excuses, and stands beside my bar stool.

“You are most welcome,” he grins as he picks up the conversation I was foolish enough to initiate. “I’m just pleased I could buy you a drink.”

“Technically you didn’t. You stole one,” I say with little emotion as I stare straight ahead into the mirror and watch him.

He hasn’t taken his eyes off me, not even acknowledging the woman still trying to regain his attention beside him.

“What?” I ask sharply and turn to him as he continues to grin at me.

“Hello.”

He smiles at me, that same brilliant smile he’s tossed at just about everyone that has paid him any attention since he walked into the place tonight.

“Hi,” I respond.

Smooth, I chastise myself.

I wish I hadn’t noticed him. I wish he hadn’t walked over here. I wish-

I wish he would tell me his name.

“Trystan.”

I narrow my eyes at him, it’s like he’s read my mind. I don’t like it. I don’t trust it.

I look at his hand extended in the little space between us and finally take it.

“Gabriel.”

“Pleasure to meet you, Gabriel.”

His voice is honey and I’m stupid enough to want nothing more than to hear my name on his lips again. I simply nod in response and turn back to the mirror across the bar.

Anything to distract myself and avoid him.

“What brings you out here tonight?” he asks.

I can’t help but chuckle. “That line ever work for you?”

His laugh is bright and genuine as he answers, “It’s not a line. I am simply trying to start up a conversation with the gorgeous, albeit brooding, man at the bar, who is drinking alone.”

“That line ever work for you?” I grin

“You tell me.”

I turn back to him and take my time looking him over, deciding whether he’s worth the time or effort.

Sharply dressed, even for a bar, even for a New York bar. Expensive, tailored suit. Manicured nails. Hands that have probably never seen a days hard labor. A ring with a snake on it. Gold, large, expensive. Sculpted brows and neatly trimmed facial hair. Product in his hair and cologne that undoubtedly costs more than my month’s rent.

Maybe worth it for some fun but definitely not for the heartache that will inevitably come from messing with the likes of him.

Nope. No way. This would be a disaster before it even started.

“Tempting, but I don’t mess with,” I pause and look him over again, “with…,” I trail off unsure how to put ‘rich snobs’ nicely.

“With what?”

“With whatever you are,” I gesture at him.

“And what am I? Beyond the given.”

“And what’s the given?” I’m stupid enough to ask.

“A mysterious and handsome stranger that came to your rescue,” he winks.

I chuckle and shake my head. “You’re not my type. I don’t go for rich flirts.”

“Rich flirt?” his laugh rings out across even the din of the pub. “What makes you think I’m that?”

“Your suit and overall appearance tell me you are wealthy. Money has never been an issue for you. More than likely, you have more than you know what to do with. Your smiles, winks, and overall demeanor with everyone in here tells me you are a serial flirt. Too smooth and confident in how good looking you are. Those looks have seen you through life, and I’d wager, into plenty of beds.”

I watch as his smile grows with each of my words. Not what I was expecting, but I stand by my evaluation and my resolve to not let him flirt his way into anything with me.

“Should I continue?” I ask to distract myself from getting lost in the brilliance of that smile.

“Please do,” he laughs. “But only over dinner.”

He stands and holds his hand out to me.

“I don’t think so,” I say as I swallow the last of my stolen drink. “But thanks.”

“You are really going to let me dine alone? I have a table over there and a date that didn’t show up. Join me and tell me about all my other faults while I convince you I could be exactly your type.”

“Or my next mistake,” I say.

“Maybe,” he shrugs with a grin. “But, either way, I’m bound to be way more thrilling than sitting alone.”

“Fine,” I sigh as I stupidly let myself be talked out of all reason and into whatever brand of madness he is.

——————————

All Choices Tag: @storyofmychoices @peonierose @aallotarenunelma @inlocusmads

Other Tags: @choicesbookclub

#choices cop #trystan thorne #trystan x gabriel #my drabble #i like to live dangerously and do not edit so please forgive any mistakes

[valentinehorrors]

Casey's Fears Part 2

(TW: transphobia, bullying, death)

Cave mouth.

Not something new he's heard, and to those who ask what happened, he gives a simple explanation, a hockey accident.

Not a lie, but not the full truth. And when one talks with an expert in in lying, that doesn't fly.

He almost says he doesn't want to talk about it, but something about those sharp, ice blue eyes that stare through any farce he could ever muster up compels him to open up once again.

His second true fear, being found out.

No one in the area knows of his original birth gender, he's learned his lesson.

While he doesn't remember much of the events after he was locked in his room, he remembers all too well the days following.

Casey's mom was, justifiably, very upset. His dad tried to blame the alcohol, how he was raised, that he just doesn't understand. Every excuse under the sun, he threw all of them out, attempting to stay afloat. But there really was no excuse to keep a whole garbage bag full of rat corpses and then spread said corpses on his son's bed.

"If she wants to be a man so bad then she has to learn to man up!"

That one earned him a firm slap. It was the worst argument Casey had ever witnessed. He slept in his sister's room that night, even she didn't fully know what had happened.

The next day, Casey's mom had told both him and his sister to pack up, that they were leaving. Going somewhere far away from that horrible old man that she herself had been to young and too in love to see how horrible he truly was. He had just woken up and was only taking about every other word but he got the memo.

"When you fall in love one day... Please... be sure you know who they are, who they truly are..."

Something like that at least.

Next thing he knew, he and his sister had turned packing into a game, distracted as what was once arguing turned to begging, Casey's father begging to stay afloat in the boat that he had started sinking in the first place. Casey's mom was going out because she had... something to do before moving them out, he struggled to remember, he was young and his sister even younger.

She said she was going to be back for them at ten.

8:00 AM

He made breakfast for his sister, she didn't really want to eat it, but he managed.

8:30 AM

Their father started... sobbing? That was new... and caused Case's stomach to churn, he didn't feel like throwing up again. He convinced his sister to listen to music, drown it out, that would work...

9:00 AM

He started banging at their door, begging forgiveness. A grown adult, a bumbling, crying mess. Casey might've considered it if he wasn't using the same breath to throw more excuses at him.

"I saw some shit back in my day! Every man needs to see some shit to toughen up! That's just how it goes!"

And yet...

"I can't have my girls taken away from me please!"

Yeah...

9:55 AM

Casey was hugging his sister close, seemed like the old man had gone bac to drowning his sorrows, he could vaguely hear him trying to call his mom again...

Just a bit longer...

10:00 AM

Any second now...

10:10 AM

His sister was worried, he swore she was coming back any second now...

10:30 AM

Any...

10:40 AM

Second...

11:00 AM

Now...

12:27 PM

...

There were lights outside...

After his mother's death, things changed drastically. His father went back to being quiet, but he was... overwhelmingly supportive. Legal name change, hormones, all paid for. He figures it's in the form of some kind of apology.

So they moved, brand new clean slate. Casey Jones, a punk kid, always getting into fights, blood running a bit too hot for his own good. Your average rebellious teen boy.

He had promised his mom that he would live as himself and be damn happy doing it.

"..."

Casey sighed as he finished his story, leaning back until he was now laying down on the cold concrete rooftop, staring at the dazzling night sky, stars glimmering as though they could see him and wanted him to know.

Mikey didn't respond for a bit, allowing the silence to rest over them. But his eyes never left the human, his cold gaze never left his human.

Eventually, those cold eyes appeared in Casey's vision as Mikey looked down at him, "And your teeth?"

Casey paused before nodding "oh, yeah, that was the whole point of that." He chuckled dryly, "So, few years later, I'm fully me... 'scept some assholes caught me changing after hockey practice... saw my binder..." He huffed as he moved his hands under his head, his own eyes moving from the vibrant stars to those frozen lakes the turtle had for eyes. He got quieter, voice a hushed whisper as he spilled secrets he had never breathed to anyone else before. "They called me a freak... They beat me... Doctor said I was lucky, didn't swallow any of the teeth..."

It was a subtle change, it's not like Mikey's eyes shifted dramatically or changed color, but the way he held them always changed when he let his mask drop. They got sharper, more observant, and cold, so very cold. Mikey's gaze could freeze the ocean, he almost would feel as though his blood was freezing, crystallizing, every time he felt those icy eyes on him, sending shivers through him.

"Humans truly do amaze me at times..." His voice was different too, his true voice lacked any actual emotion or indication of tone, it was also slightly deeper, as the turtle lightly raised his voice when he had his mask up.

No one else got to see this Mikey, no one else got to see those true cold eyes. Not even his brothers, all living with a lie.

The real Michelangelo was many things, numb, cold, observant, apathetic, curious...

And dark.

He wasn't an idiot, there's a reason that whenever he saw Mikey's true smile, it made Casey's hair stand on end, his gut saying one thing:

D A N G E R

Casey had two main fears, rats, and being outed.

Casey has three fears.

#tmnt 2012 #tmnt #tmnt au #mikey x casey #teenage mutant ninja turtles #yandere mikey #obsession #sadistic mikey #tmnt fanfiction #tmnt casey jones #tmnt mikey #trans casey jones #unmasked Mikey

[concealeddarkness13]

Fun fact: I am a dumbass who wants to drown my sorrows of Chess getting obliterated in the final poll of the oc tournament by making a tournament for my own oc's, lol. I got this idea from @calicohyde's tournament! Please check that out!

So, I chose some of my main characters to go up against each other, and I can't wait to see how it goes! I'm making this initial post so it isn't as confusing when I post 12 different polls once I'm done setting them up. The polls will be a week long each, and there are 24 characters, so it'll be a fun little tournament. And it gives me an excuse to talk about my oc's and stories!

Tagging: @ratracechronicler, @maple-writes, @pen-of-roses, @drabbleitout, and @grailfish

#writeblr #my oc tournament

[usernamerenn]

CONVINCE ME

pairing. mitsuya takashi x f!reader

summary. when a kiss from you is all that is needed in order to convince mitsuya

note. spoilers, intoxication. a request from @portgaes. likes and reblogs are always appreciated

When Mitsuya had moved out of his family home to follow his dreams of becoming a fashion designer, he honestly thought that he would only ever have to worry about himself. Luna and Mana were older now and able to look after themselves, and his mother was starting to become more considerate of her own health, taking fewer shifts at work because of this. He was finally free to focus on himself, his career, and his future, so imagine Mitsuya’s surprise and annoyance when he had received a text message from your friend, telling him to come and collect his irresponsibly intoxicated girlfriend.

He couldn’t help but sigh in exasperation as he took sight of your dazed form and overly happy grin as your friend handed you over with a slight smile and said, “Sorry, I couldn’t stop her.”

“What happened?” Mitsuya asked as you immediately held onto him and affectionately leaned into his chest, quietly mumbling about how nice and cool his sweater felt against your heated cheeks. Admittedly, he found it very difficult to stay angry at you and your poor life decisions when you were being this cute.

“Exam results came back today,” your friend explained sadly. “Didn’t get the grades that she was expecting, so she decided to drown herself in alcohol.”

Raising an eyebrow at this, Mitsuya conceded to the fact that he could understand your sentiment of wanting a distraction from your poor grades, yet this didn’t give you an excuse to not take care of yourself and inconvenience your friend. So with another tired sigh, Mitsuya thanked the young woman before offering his goodbyes, now turning his attention to you as you pouted in indignation at his suggestion of sleep.

“I don’t want to go to sleep, Takashi!” you loudly complained as he attempted to guide you away from the elevators and toward the direction of your shared apartment.

“I know, but it’s late, and we wouldn’t want to wake anyone up, would we?” he tried to reason, but you simply refused to listen to him or even move from where you were standing. “Come on, babe, you still have classes tomorrow.”

“No, I don’t! I’m quitting school!” you responded dramatically, about to fall over if Mitsuya hadn’t grabbed onto your shoulders. “What’s the point of studying and going to classes if I can’t get the grades that I want? I-I’m a failure, Takashi! Just leave me alone and let me drink my sorrows away!”

“Okay, I’m going to have to stop you right there,” your boyfriend playfully warned as his hands came to lovingly rest on your waist. “Listen, getting a certain grade on a test doesn’t denote your intelligence or worth as a person. You’re a lot more than just a number on a piece of paper. Babe, you’re funny, kind, beautiful, and incredibly smart in your own way, and I know that I didn’t fall in love with a so-called failure, so stop thinking of yourself as one, okay?”

And for a quick moment, Mitsuya was scared that he had said too much, as he was worryingly met with the sight of subtle tears in your eyes, your head lowering for a second before you broke out into an uncontrollably bright smile, one that had him almost forgetting how to breathe because of its absolute brilliance and beauty.

“You’re in love with me, huh?” you remarked teasingly as your arms locked around Mitsuya’s neck.

“Not right now, no,” he said with an amused and challenging smirk. “Right now, you’re just some crazy, drunk girl that I need to get into our apartment before she wakes someone up. Generally speaking, though, yes. Sincerely and hopelessly so.”

Listening to your delighted giggles, Mitsuya couldn’t help but smile in response as you pulled him closer into your embrace, his head now gently resting on top of yours as you both enjoyed this quiet moment together. It wasn’t the most romantic or ideal scene, considering how the two of you were standing in some poorly lit hallway with him plainly dressed in a hoodie and sweats, but Mitsuya thought that this moment together was more than perfect. You were here with him, after all.

“Takashi? Carry me?” you requested a while later, making him raise an eyebrow in disbelief.

“Babe, I love you, but you need to learn that there are consequences to your actions,” Mitsuya stated as he did his best to avoid your round, pleading eyes. One look was all that it would take for him to agree to your demand, and he knew that he couldn’t allow that to happen.

“Please?” you asked so sweetly with that cute, sleepy pout of yours. “I’m tired.”

“And I’m not?” he replied while almost laughing. “I’m not going to carry you, so let’s just-”

Mitsuya, however, was unable to say another word as you quickly silenced him with a gentle, fleeting kiss, one that had him wanting nothing more than to chase after and reciprocate. Yet your boyfriend knew that he was a weak man when it came to you, so he told himself to ignore the pleasure and delightfully sweet and bitter taste of alcohol that still remained on your sinful, tempting lips.

It took all of his self-control to not give in to the intoxicating scent of your perfume or the closeness of your body as you soon began to paint his neck with various shades of red and purple. He soon found himself getting drunk on the thought of you and your touches, and it was only after hearing your desperately dulcet request once more did Mitsuya’s resolve finally break, yet he still managed to stop himself from grabbing your neck and kissing you senseless, wishing to absolutely ruin you until all that you could remember was his name.

“Please, Takashi?”

So with a defeated sigh, Mitsuya proceeded to lift you like a groom would with his beloved bride, faintly smiling once he saw the immediate happiness and excitement on your face as he began to carry you toward the apartment. “Only until we reach the door, all right? Then you’re on your own.”

“You’re the best, Takashi! I love you!”

“I love you, too.”

tokyo revengers taglist. @crown5 @blacksun-judar @chloee0x0​ @zuuki​ @chiaki3nanami​

#mitsuya takashi #mitsuya takashi x you #mitsuya takashi x reader #mitsuya takashi imagines #mitsuya takashi scenarios #mitsuya takashi reader insert #tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers reader insert #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers x you #tokyo revengers imagines #tokyo revengers scenarios #tokrev #tokrev reader insert #tokrev x reader #tokrev x you #tokrev imagines #tokrev scenarios

[ferris-the-wheel]

Posted 4/17/24

So yall know how I'm a pretty avid writer (you probably didn't know that but I am; I aspire to be an author one day), so I have come here today to share with you some examples of my writing style and some random things I came up with by using a one word or sentence prompt generator.

All of these were created by me using my own brain so even if you look them up as quotes or whatever (in the scenario where you don't believe I actually wrote them), you will not find them :)

Warning: this post is really fricking long TvT

1. (Prompt word: Rain)

It was cold. Wet. Absolutely miserable. How did it end up like this? What had happened to end up here? It circled under the strong wooden beams above it as rain assaulted the already water-covered ground to its left. But the rain didn't care, relentlessly slashing the ground with its force. It watched the rain for a moment with a curious light in its eyes. Finally, it sat down, not caring to stand anymore. Not willing to live in such a cruel fated world that had cast it aside like dirt.

It felt its heart beat slowly, so slowly, then it quickened, as though a frightful thought had made it wish to run, escape from its own body. And such a thought had indeed entered its mind. Will its demise surely be here? With nothing but the muddied ground and withered leaves beneath a rotting bridge, would they be its sole companions until death came to receive its lone soul from its own lifeless body?

2. (Prompt: Write about someone eavesdropping on a private conversation)

He shouldn't be doing this. Only bad things come to those who don't do as they should. But he was curious, like a moth to a flame that would inevitably become burnt by its warmth as the creature strayed too close. His heart raced, panicked at the moment when he would become discovered, for he knew there would be no solution, no excuse, that could explain why he sat there, lurking, listening silently to a conversation from a wine cabinet, crouched like a cat behind the crisscrossed wine shelves.

3. (Prompt: Write about someone in a dream)

The girl heard a voice in her ear. She turned but... there was no one there. Just a vast plain of emptiness, of a clearness that refused to be understood. Her mind seemed to think that it'd be unwise to attempt to comprehend it, an offense to one unseen but always watching. But yet, she found herself thinking. What could this place be? As though her own brain had betrayed her impertinence, she found herself falling, feeling as though she was a ball being bounced about by a small child. Yet despite this, she fell straight and downward into another, further unknown that promised fear to the heart of the one who dared question its existence.

She found herself falling forward, but as she blinked, she realized that someone stood beside her. Her mind, numb from sleep, began to slowly awaken. A voice reached her ears, not as hollow and soothing as the one from the unspoken place. This voice seemed so harsh and jagged compared to the ethereal one that had spoken silently into her ears, no words being said but her mind knowing what it meant.

The sharper voice spoke again, but she could not understand its words. Her tired mind managed to fixate on the wall in front of her, wincing at the bursts of color, so different from the place of nothing, yet the wall was made of plain wood. A hand shook her shoulder, so she turned to look at its owner, hoping to see the nothing again, but her hopes were cruelly torn away upon seeing a woman instead, a look of what seemed to be concern on her face.

4. (Prompt: In an attic)

He found himself amused by everything nowadays. Trapped in a small, dingy attic, slowly dying of a disease that no one had even heard of. The old fool below leisured about, drowning away his sorrows of losing his only son in a bottle of some odd mixture of alcohol. But yet, his son had not died of the disease, because the disease was only in the drunkard's own head. But oh, his son was dying, not of illness, but of starvation. Starvation does funny things one's head, the son realized. It messed with your mind.

He supposed that he never felt very amused before, so everything became something of amusement now that he could feel his own mind bending and snapping, each day becoming more unbearable. Yet he beared it, for reasons unknown to himself or to his father, who came up once every morning to see if his child had perished yet, only to disappear down the steps upon seeing he had not.

5. (Prompt: A sad song)

She was singing that sad old tune again. The girl watched her mother sit, staring off into the darkened forest, a haunting melody falling from her lips. There were never words to this song, but perhaps that would have made it more bearable. It used to be a comforting lullaby. Now it greeted her every night in her nightmares.

6. (Prompt: Mom's always telling me to come straight home)

Mom's always telling me to come straight home. It's a well-known rule amongst those in town: don't be caught outside after dark. Bad things happen at night... I should have followed that rule. Most children questioned that rule, but followed it nonetheless. I was different. I wish I hadn't been as inquisitive, as curious, as daring... The lone thing that holds no form, that wanders the streets at night, waiting, watching, for something to move. Even animals know to remain motionless, because it knows when you move.

I didn't see it coming until it was too late. It made no noise as it approached, nor when its teeth closed around my throat. Now I wander as it does, unable to speak, unable to feel, unable to warn those who did as I did, and sneak out at night to prove the rule wrong. That nothing bad happens at night. Because bad things do happen at night. I am one of them.

Ooooo, maybe you guys should start giving me writing prompts and I'll write a short (or long) kinda story thing like these :O I'm also going to continue to post these little short things as well when I come up with them. Not on long posts like this one, I was a bit excited lol

#ೃ⁀➷ ferris' ramblings

[i-love-an-alcoholic]

Via dolorosa

Easter holidays are almost over. We visited some relatives and had a dinner at my father's on Friday. Ever since he moved close to us we've spent most of the holidays over there, and on top of that my sister and her boyfriend came to visit from the other side of the country (which is about 4-5 hours drive in Finland).

The last time S drank was on Monday March 18th. He had a couple of days off in the middle of the week and wanted to have his drinking day then instead of his usual Friday and I was fine with it. I asked him if he really wanted to do it, as he'd have to be sober for two weekends in a row since we had already agreed to no alcohol during Easter. He assured me that he understood and was ready for it.

Eleven days is a long time for an alcoholic.

S began pleading on Saturday two days ago, and proposed we'd go drinking with my sister and her bf. I was pretty sure they didn't want to waste their holidays by being hung over, so I said no. S wasn't happy, but he persevered.

Yesterday he pleaded again and this time tried to use his own brother as an excuse. (He's going through a tough time and S wanted to invite him over to drown his sorrows. What a wonderful idea.) I thought that was shitty, and called him out. He got mad and spent the rest of the day sulking.

This morning S was not in a good mood, but his mind was clear. He had had a hard couple of days, but was able to put his thoughts into words and reflect on his feelings. He wanted to go for a walk which we did, and felt so much better afterwards.

I think the last couple of days have been a fine example how powerful alcohol addiction truly is. Even though S is no longer drinking daily, the psychological addiction is strong enough to make thirteen days of sobriety such a difficult task. I'm going to be the bad guy and make him wait until next Friday (which he'll have to do anyway because of his other responsibilities), and by that time he'll have a whopping 16 days of sobriety under his belt. It may not be the best he can do, but it's progress.

#i love an alcoholic #recovery #addiction recovery #alcoholism

[charli-buckley]

My hands shook as I took a steadying breath, sitting down at the kitchen table across from momma.

Alice Cortez folded her hands on the wooden surface and waited, but I couldn’t bring myself to meet her eyes just yet. I knew what they would reflect: disappointment. The gentle woman wasn’t the type to get angry, even when a situation deserved it. Even now. 

“Charli…” Alice’s voice was quiet yet rousing, forcing me to finally lift my gaze to hers. I swallowed hard as I faced the despondency staring back at me. Hazel eyes — full of sorrow for her family and for me — begged silently for understanding. “Charli… why, baby? Just… why?”

The pet name filled my throat with emotion, choking me momentarily before I somehow found my voice. “I… I wish I had a good excuse for myself. I hurt the person I love the most because I felt lonely, sad, and just… mixed up. I get restless and self destructive. You know that August has his own struggles and I stupidly avoided talking about mine so that I wouldn’t burden him. I was like a pressure cooker and when I exploded, god, I took out everyone around me.” Shamefully, I bowed my head and fidgeted with the hem of my shirt. “It’s the most selfish thing I’ve ever done.”

“Where do you think that comes from?” Alice asked gently. “That need to self-destruct?”

I swallowed heavily at this. I wasn’t expecting a deep-dive into my psyche but Alice deserved answers. “I just think I have low self esteem.” I confessed. “I think it’s a form of self harm. After my mom died, I ran as far as I could from every person who loved me and drowned my sorrows in drugs. I didn’t care if I lived or died.” My eyes filled with tears at the memories. “When I… did what I did… I had convinced myself that August was tired of me. That he wanted someone else. Yet, I never once asked him or communicated my feelings. I just silently spiraled.”

Alice clicked her tongue in sympathy, likely for both myself and her son. “Honey, it sounds like you have abandonment issues. Your mother dying was a form of abandonment and a huge blow to your life. Beyond your massive and painful mistakes, you’re not a bad person. You’re worthy of love and you don’t need to hate yourself.” 

My initial reaction was to argue. I do need to hate myself. I’m not worthy of love. And I definitely don’t deserve August. But then I remembered who this was coming from. Someone who should hate me, yell at me, tell me that my mistakes have ruined so much… and yet, she’s soothing me and understanding me.

“How do I accept love?” I asked quietly, my wet eyes lifting to meet Alice again. “How do I convince myself that I’m actually deserving of what life has given me? August, specifically.” I sniffled. “I have never felt deserving of him.”

“I don’t know what August will do, but everyone is worthy of love. There is no such thing as a perfect person. We all want to love and to feel loved and we all have flaws. Therefore, love involves two flawed individuals. Each of them is worthy of love and being in a relationship. How would you feel if August said he didn’t deserve love because of his mistakes?”

The thought made me inhale sharply. “I would say that’s ridiculous because he’s still the best person in the world.” 

Alice smiled knowingly. “And there’s people out there who feel the same about you, Charli. You are worthy.” 

We ended our conversation with an embrace, allowing me to unload days and days of emotions with a hard cry into Alice’s shoulder. August joined us moments later and grabbed a few bottles of Coca Cola from the fridge. He walked to me and threw an arm around my shoulder while we all enjoyed our drinks, and for a moment — even if temporary — everything felt okay. My weary heart welcomed the feeling with new hope. 

#charli narrative