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#food for thought ~ likes;;
yesokayiknow · 6 months
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i hope that sometimes fifteen's psychic paper shorts out and shows what fourteen's thinking back on earth. he tries to sneak in somewhere and the guard's like this just says 'need to pick up cat food'? and fifteen's like 🥺 they got a cat
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deadmomjokes · 2 years
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PSA: tomatoes are not spicy. Tomatoes and tomato products should not be spicy. Pizza sauce isn't inherently spicy. Tomato-based pasta sauce is not spicy. Ketchup is NOT spicy.
If tomatoes are spicy, you have an allergy to tomatoes.
This announcement brought to you by my almost 29-year-old husband learning for the first time in his 2.8 decades of putting food products into his mouth that spaghetti and saucy pizza aren't spicy foods
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mfshipbracket · 1 year
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hailsatanacab · 7 months
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A Persuasive Argument - dpxdc
"Great!" Danny says, clapping his hands together to get everyone's attention. The dinner table falls silent as everyone looks towards him. It's a full house today and, honestly, Danny's a little nervous. "I'm sure you're all wondering why I gathered you here today."
"It's dinnertime. In our house." Duke mutters, while doing a very bad job of concealing his yawn. He holds his fork poised over the braised beef, but, just like everyone else, still looks towards Danny before tucking in. It's intriguing enough to wait.
"Yeah, no one misses Alfie's dinner." Dick says, with a brilliant smile that Danny can't help but return.
"Precisely! What better time to talk to you all than when you're all actually here!"
"Wait, I thought you came round to work on our English essays?" Tim asks, blinking owlishly.
"I'm afraid I've lured you here under false pretences, Tim."
"This is where I live."
"I would still really appreciate help on that essay though, I mean, what the hell is Hamlet even about? I just don't get that old time-y language, like 'Hark! A ghost hath killed me!' - absolute rubbish, what does that even mean?"
"The ghost never kills anyone in Hamlet, he's there to tell Hamlet that he was murdered. Have you actually read it?"
"No, but it sounds like you have. Tim, I want this guy to help me with my essay instead. I know for a fact that you haven't read Hamlet, either."
"So? We don't need Jason, I've read the Sparknotes."
"Hi Jason, I'm Danny, pleasure to meet you, summarise Hamlet in three sentences or less."
"Am I auditioning to help you write your essays? I can't believe you’ve gone through your whole school life without reading it, it’s good!"
"Hamlet, along with a number of other classics, was banned in our house because it portrayed ghosts as intelligent and sympathetic beings rather than evil, animalistic beasts. I didn’t even get to see The Muppet's Christmas Carol until last year with Tim! It was surprisingly good, and I hate Christmas because everyone always argued and it sucked. But we're getting off topic. I—"
"No, no, please go back to that, because what the fu—"
"Boys, please." Bruce interrupts, looking to the world as if he wants to hang his head in his hands. "Danny, you were about to say something?"
"Oh, yeah, Mr. Wayne! Thanks!"
"Please, call me Bruce."
"Well, that very succinctly brings me to my point, because I'd actually really like to call you dad."
Nobody says a word. Nobody even blinks, all as shocked as the other, watching open-mouthed as Danny pulls his laptop out from beside his chair. Bruce can definitely feel a headache coming on.
"Before you say anything, I've prepared a 69 slide PowerPoint presentation on why you, Bruce Wayne, should adopt me, Danny Last-Name-Pending. Please save your questions, comments, and verdict until the end, thank you."
#dpxdc#batpham#i forget - can we tag the parent fandoms? w/e#immediately alfred's like: while i do appreciate your initiative may i suggest it wait until after dinner?#and danny - who has barely eaten proper homecooked food ever - takes one bite and then absolutely wolfs down the whole lot#after he's finished he's like 'bear with - I've got to add that to the 'Reasons I Would Like to Live Here' section'#danny's powerpoint has tailored sections for each batfam member with lists of reasons why they'd get along#my au thoughts on this is that the fentons disowned danny when he told them he was phantom#and that this is after the ultimate enemy - wherein which he allied himself with the JL to fight against dan#(which didnt really work at all - BUT he knows some of their identities now INCLUDING batman's)#so one of the main reasons why he'd be a great fit is that he knows their vigilante status anyway so they don’t need to worry about secrets#dick just turns to tim like 'he’s your friend. he learnt this from you.'#tim: 'i didn't tell him our identities!! i would never!!'#dick: 'no i know that. it's the stalker tendancies. it's baby tim all over again'#tim: scandalised gasp#they all eat dinner in silence just super subdued and in shock and sending glances to bruce and danny#duke like: 'so i know I'm the last one in the family but like... this isn't how it normally happens right? did any of you make powerpoints?#tim gets all shifty because he absolutely did make a powerpoint he just never actually showed it to anyone#everyone stares at tim because they all know. it was in one of bab's blackmail files she has on him#damian's slide has danny offering to throw down at any time. 'tim says you like to prove yourself with your skills?#how about a real challenge? if i beat you then you have to vote yes to adopting me!'#damian is in two minds about accepting because... 1) look at him damian could take danny in his sleep! but#2) on the off chance that he does win... damian does not want any more brothers#(he takes the bet and its a suprisingly fun fight - and while he'll never say this... he would vote yes even without the wager)#on one of danny's slides there's a picture of ellie: you'll also get my clone sister! two children for the price of one!!#uhhh.... thats it now - I've been having fun with this haha#spent all day with the 'ive lured you here under false pretences' 'danny i live here' line in my head haha#anyway enjoy!!!!!! this was fun#i wanna make these slides so bad
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puppyeared · 5 months
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my attempt at making a fursona
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paintedkinzy-88 · 5 months
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Take them. Take them before I regret everything and delete it all— /j
Fbsjfnksnf you have no idea the anxiety I have plowed through to get this out there it has been REALLY HARD FOR SOME REASON. BUT. Here they be. Some kind of intro to a Rise Dragon AU that I’ll definitely need to name one day that is not today.
It won’t be a very big AU. Very Leo Centric if you can’t tell… what can I say I have a favorite and it shows. I just thought it would be something neat I could tamper with in between other things, like Undertale stuff and the Ghost Leo AU. All of which I will come back to. At some point.
ANYWHO yes this is all modern day New York, I liked messing with the plot more than coming up with a whole new fantasy world sue me. I’m thinking Draxum still tried to make an army, but was foiled way before he could really begin. Before that, tho, he was ALSO trying to revive the ancient yokai species of dragons, with two successful specimens so far… but all four were snatched when Splints escaped. One dragon, three eggs.
There’s a lot more to that but that’s the basic bitch summary for now. ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
Oh and don’t trust the height ref there, this one is more accurate:
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bytebun · 7 months
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my piece for @thecodywanzine! thanks to the mods who let me go completely ham and cheese on this bad boy. this one's about living longer than you ever expected and not knowing what to do with it
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thesongminjoon · 2 years
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When there's too much talking
I like to go out walking
I never know how long I'll be
It depends who's asking
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51ft · 9 months
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U don't have to write dialog if their kissing 👉👉
UR SO RIGHT
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shootingthe-stars · 10 days
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having jily thoughts. like wow. everyone lily cared about eventually left her but here comes in james “my last breath will be used to defend you” potter and i’m supposed to think they’re boring apparently
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kobrafangs · 24 days
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something something jaya something forget me nots
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maomango-doodle · 3 months
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Jazz puns, am I right?
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Some random doodles
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ren-144p · 9 months
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something about the first few episodes of the terror having so many numbers. the men, the provisions, the inventory; but also the tension of counting. the scene where goodsir takes a picture of john franklin and his men and he's counting down the seconds. the lashes being counted down during hickey's punishment. and something about how in later episodes, numbers get lost. dates get forgotten. counting just stops. all of it becomes insignificant. like it was a countdown at first but now the time is just running out instead
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nelkcats · 10 months
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Refuge
Danny was not retired, technically he came when people needed him, he helped or protected them as the case may be. It just turned out that over the years they stopped needing him.
And that was fine, it meant humanity could take care of itself, it meant they were safe. That was what had to matter, no matter that deep down, the halfa was hurt by the information.
It was harder to accept change when you weren't part of it. Danny was immortal, eternal, and powerful, things that no longer fit the world. Not with all the heroes and wizards running around, not with Amity Park fading away, becoming nothing more than a part of his memories.
He fit in perfectly in the Realms, sure, but he knew that if he stayed there too long he'd stop feeling human, and that was dangerous.
So, no, Danny wasn't retired. But he lived in a simple house in Metropolis, though sometimes he got tired of Superman being able to hear literally everything and moved to his house in Fawcett. He used to switch between the two houses frequently, not that it was difficult since he had figured out how to make portals.
He had a few friends, like the orphan boy who lived at the train station and Conner, a teenager who sometimes just needed a house to stay in when he couldn't stand his father.
Neither Conner nor Billy minded his age, which was comforting, although they both got curious when he visited the other house. Danny didn't know how to explain that Eternity Rock and Superman made him nervous if he stayed too long (he didn't like feeling watched), so he just shrugged and told them he had two houses.
Neither of the kids understood but they accepted it. They both had a habit of calling him "Uncle", Danny thought it was odd, given that his appearance wasn't exactly...adult, but it seemed they were comfortable with that, and he left them alone.
Apparently his house (occupied or not) had become a haven for them. Danny always greeted them with a sandwich, or cookies, even though he felt like a grandmother doing so. He smiled for the first time in years, feeling happy to fit into someone's life.
That's why it was quite disconcerting to find the Justice League outside his door asking him to join them. Danny chuckled internally, because the current heroes actually believed they could force him into something, but he accompanied them anyway.
Superboy and Captain Marvel scowled at the League as soon as they entered the Watchtower, when they were told they were bringing in a "dangerous individual" they didn't expect to see their unofficial uncle.
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lotus-pear · 8 months
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i think you guys are onto smth..
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i unironically got invested in this HELP
#WHERES THE FIC AT IF SOMEONE WRITES THIS I WILL PAY THEM A HUNDRED DOLLARS😭😭#kunikida serving the country while dazai's serving cunt😔#dazai was born to malewife but forced to manipulate and i think that's the greatest tragedy of bsd#anyway some facts i would like to share abt this au thay i came up w while drawing!!#takes place in 1939 (start of wwii) and there was a mandatory draft that required one male over eighteen from each house to serve#both of them are still twenty two and had been engaged for abt two years before getting married that year#newlyweds! unfortunately kuni had to go fight and they were seperated :(#before the war kunikida was a math teacher at the local high school and dazai obviously managed the household and didn't work#he's hopeless at cooking and meal prep even w recipie books so they either get those prepackaged meals or kuni makes dinner when he gets ba#so like when he's making lunch for kunikida he normally just packs a basic sandwich w raw fruit#kunikida always appreciates the effort even tho hes probably sick of having the same thing everyday but he won't complain abt it#when kunikida joined the army he was relieved that the mess hall had better food than dazai#he was the only one in his platoon that never complained abt the food so his fellow soldiers assumed it was bc he came from a tough bg#when in reality he was just used to being poisoned on a daily basis from his dumbass husbands cooking and was hardly fazed from army ration#they write to each other although its more dazai sending and kuni receiving bc hes off fighting and doesnt have time to write back#dazai talks abt life on the homefront and how he has to grow a victory garden (everything is DYING HE CANT EVEN RAISE TOMATOES)#and kuni writes abt his fellow soldiers and how the war is going and when he thinks he'll be home and how he misses sleeping in a bed#ANYWAY yea thought i'd share sry for infodumping in the tags again#this post is for like the four ppl that care abt this specific flavor of knkdz so hopefully this gets four notes at least#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikida doppo#doppo kunikida#kunikidazai#knkdz#lotus draws#bro sry for posting at two in the morning i couldnt sleep until i got this out of my head they have infested my brain
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black-and-yellow · 2 months
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