#form us with love

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Happy Thistle Debut Day!

#dungeon meshi #Thistle #Old dungeon meshi fans remember the days when it was ambiguous what gender Thistle was. #Now we know Thistle uses he/him pronouns but in my heart Thistle is still non-binary. Clowngender elf with poor coping skills. #I hope the anime-only watchers know that this is a character to keep an eye on. #Love (in it's many forms) and desire (in it's many forms) is the main course of Dungeon Meshi and THIS silly jester? #My goodness. What a perfect encapsulation of how one can hurt other's so deeply in the name of love. #The actions we take to 'protect' other's is often the route to doing the most harm. #Love is letting go. Sometimes that means control and sometimes that means saying farewell forever to someone.

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[braisedhoney]

okay but can you imagine—

#danny phantom #danny phantom fanart #dp #dp fanart #danny fenton #dan phantom #dark danny #tucker foley #sam manson #a glitch in time #a glitch in time spoilers #agit #agit spoilers #danny phantom spoilers #i know i KNOW we saw dan just as phantom with red eyes #but it makes me laugh to think abt a world where he can change back into his future form at will #maybe he can do both and he just uses it to mess with danny lmao #if he changes the logo that's one secret identity people just. would not guess #tried to make this one more chill and agit helped a lot :P simpler expressions #also loving how we all just slapped a ponytail on the danny clone #i gave him a dress shirt to emphasize the half-vlad thing #but tbh i do like the trend of giving him edgy t-shirts and hoodies lmao #ney's comics #ney's art #also *collapses from exhaustion* #why do i KEEP MAKING COMICS #WHY DO I KEEP DOING THAT

[greelin]

equipping these not for strategic reasons. but gay ones

#bg3 #sorry for my issues and problems. #not using this in whatever the hell was going on between the two who had these previously. donot care for those vibes. this is for love now #shut th fuck up about ‘not reading the journal’. i read it. i reject that nonsense and am forming new association. my world now #rb’s off bc none of you can shut the hell up or read<3

[novelconcepts]

The defintion of hell is knowing a show is incredibly well-received in its first season, but if people don’t become machines churning out tweets, content, and rewatching 24/7, there’s no likelihood it’ll get a chance to tell its whole story. This shit is madness. Shows in different genres shouldn’t have to pit-battle for dominance. First seasons are MEANT to be baselines establishing worlds and characters, not complete storylines. The idea that this golden age of television has turned into “get it done in one or get out” is revolting.

#the sandman #paper girls #some of the hot takes on Twitter are breaking me #‘why don’t we know the whole story? it’s bad writing if you don’t have a complete story in the first season’ girl WHAT since WHEN #how many excellent shows were weak as fuck in S1?? and here we’re getting shows with incredible first seasons fighting for their lives #like fuckin Christ dude the idea of long form storytelling is allowing your story time and space to spread out #otherwise we would only make movies #i am so sick of this edge of my seat fear that any new show I fall in love with will get axed because the higher powers don’t care about art #this has to be a bubble right? this has to pop at some point and go back to shows valued on what they are #and don’t even get me started on creators having to beg for good reviews to balance out review-bombing from shitheads #if every one star review is clearly bigoted from the comments? why is anyone taking them into account?? #why is there no way to manage this shit aside from creators being like ‘please help us”’

[bluerosefox]

Tim, buddy, what do you mean you might had accidentally made a Love Child?!

Danny finds out that

1. He's a clonish 'love child' of two heroes

2. He was accidentally created during one of his donors mental break downs after losing his father and best friends (one of which was his other donor)

3. CW interfered before his creator realized what he made and pulled him out of that dimension because "it would had lead that world to true ruin if he found out at his state of mind. He's better now but it would had been the final straw for him should anything had happened to you in his care and given who he had to partner up with later... I did what I had to."

4. Due to Danny having a bad fall out with his parents after he told them about being Phantom (they didn't attack him... but they did disown him.) Danny is left adrift of what to do. He doesn't wanna bug Jazz, she's in college and dorming. Tuckers place has no room. Sam's parents would never let him stay. Vlad was a definitely a no go. And Dani (Ellie) last check in was near the Amazon rainforest.

5. Danny finds out some of his powers might not be as ghostly as he thought... it does explain the huge power boost some of his powers have compared to other ghosts.

6. He went to Clockwork... who proceeded to tell him the truth, smile his cryptic smile while saying "and now. Have fun this time around. I'll see you again in due time Daniel." Before yeeting him into a portal.

7. Danny woke up in his home dimension.... deaged to being five years old (the age he would be if he stayed and grew by now) (DC timeline is slower than DP in this)

8. He woke up apparently his creator's home city... during a Gala (Danny woke up in a garden, dazed and confused. His memories are fuzzy)... and wandered into the party... and apparently he looked like a perfect mix of his.. dads? Which catches A LOT of peoples attention.

9. Especially with Tim Drake-Wayne and Conner Kent-Luthor just announcing they're dating that very night.

10. Rumors and gossip of a random kid, who looks just like the recent happily announced couple, go flying quickly among the elite... and reaches certain ears before it gets to batfam and supers (I have a feeling they learned how to block out rumors and gossips during these events)

11. Those ears happen to be Lex Luthor and Ra's al Ghul (both who are there at the Gala just to annoy and unnerve the Bats and Supers)

12. By the time the rumors get to Tim and Conner, they find Danny almost getting taken away by one of those two.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #dp x dc #blue rambles #crossover #writing ideas #random idea #danny phantom dc #dpxdc #dcxdp #Danny is Tim and Conner's love child clone baby #Tim accidentally made him during his bad year #but due to CW getting Danny out Tim never noticed #Tim would had become a villain should ANYTHING happen to Danny if he knew #and given the fact he teamed up with Ra's later... yeah #Tim doesn't like remembering that year #he later reviews the tapes in the lab he used and found a small glitch in them where Danny was forming only to disappear a second later #when Tim sees Danny he is hit hard with how much he looks like him and Conner and gets flashbacks to his childhood and being at Galas #after DNA is confirmed and tapes are looked at Tim has to confront this old can of worms he tried to forget during his bad year #Conner is a bit conflicted over it #flattered as heck his crush and best friend back then tried cloning him to get him back but... again... he tried cloning him #and accidentally created a love child #who may or may not be now targeted by Ra's and Lex #now Tim and Conner have to parent up to a young Danny whose memories are a little fuzzy #conner kent #tim drake

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

thinkin' about Bardaby and his illusion smoke...

#went on yet another bardaby bender. these are only part of it lmao #i am often seized by the fatal need to Draw Barnaby In Some Shape Or Form #but yes. thinking very hard about the illusion smoke #i feel like sometimes he uses it recreationally... mixed with other stuff to dilute it ofc #but it keeps the color! #im imagining that it can act sort of like a Mood Ring! #the core color that he exhales yk yk! #but using it full strength for proper illusions and such #he's gotta be careful about it! it'll fuck him up! #he's built up Quite The Resistance to illusions and illusion magic over his life #but everyone has their limits... #scribble salad #wh fantasy au #IM NOT USED TO DRAWING SMOKE. IT LOOKS BAD LMAO #i'll have to work on that! look up tutorials! Practice! #anyhow i think the other scribbles need their own post #its mainly bardaby and our little warlock... #there are three ways i love drawing barnaby #i love scribbling him angry. i love scribbling him with howdy. and i love scribbling him being soft w/ wally #side note i realized earlier that part of the reason why i love characters who are just so much bigger than everyone else #ex: poppy & barnaby #is bc then its like. they're the smaller guys' personal jungle gym lmao #free bed! free climbing wall! free bean bag! free Getting Tossed Around!!!! #all wrapped up with the wonderful bow of Friend!!!! #...my touch starvedness is showing isnt it. away with ye demons!!!

[jekyllnahyena]

Give it some time Fox, he's trying his best

more dumb doodles in the Fox is the fav and thus has somehow ended up with an allpowerful evil grandpa

#commander fox #sheev palpatine #yan dooku #in his lil form here #'what do you mean you love your family and care for their well being? fascinating concept. I've only ever used it for manipulation' #im sorry to all the people coming up with deep thoughts for this au #but seriously #it all boils down to palps being saved by the power of friendship #well. more like #'i didnt know why people cared so much for their commander and then I got one of my own' #'if anything happened to Fox then I'd destroy the galaxy and then myself' #thats it #thats the au #i see what everybody is doing with thinking about implications. but this is just. dumb and silly. sorry :/ #ajekyllsart

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

it is. so weird to me that I'm having to say this again after a real-life cartoon supervillian already once ran for president on a platform of hatred & fascism and won, but.

it's November, please fucking vote

#not a shitpost #serious post #this election cycle will DETERMINE what legislation gets passed #it will DETERMINE THE FUTURE OF ABORTION RIGHTS AND GAY MARRIAGE AND OTHER LGBTQ+ PROTECTIONS #the supreme court plans to destroy as much progress as possible and that means we have to rely on congress to protect those rights #which they can only do if the Dems control the senate and the house #we are in FULL BLOWN DAMAGE CONTROL MODE here #especially because it is still somehow perfectly possible and actually probable #that the festering pile of garbage in human form who recently tried to overthrow the government will end up back on the ballot in 2024 #we still haven't recovered from 4 years of trump and if we don't show up at the polls it is perfectly possible we will get another 4 years #vote this november to protect basic human rights #and vote in november 2024 so we don't have to survive another 4 years under trump #because many of us--the most vulnerable of us--won't survive. and many many more will suffer #vote to protect yourself and your neighbors. vote to protect those who most need protection. #vote because it is the right thing to do #vote out of kindness #and vote out of spite--because billionaires are spending insane amounts of money to prevent you from voting #so tell them to get fucked and vote anyway #do it out of spite and do it out of heart and do it out of rage and do it out of love #show up #us politics

[diurnalvl]

seven years ago, they used to be friends. almost.

1 / 2 / ?

#diurna draws #vox #alastor #staticradio #radiostatic #radiosilence #onewaybroadcast #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanart #gosh i love doing more complex shading to make fake screencaps it's so satisfying. #sorry for using my personal vox design this is purely self indulgent. hey maybe vox only starts wearing bowties after this #anyways part two is going to be uploaded in a bit my doves <3 #vox made his way through the trapdoor that's why he's initially on his knees #...not any other reason... #he's so danger unaware to alastor going haywire #thing is i feel that during their friendship vox was long used to alastor hurting other people in front of him that it just... #doesn't occur to him that alastor would've ever hurt him in that way. #shame #because it never occured to alastor that vox would cross that line and ruin their friendship. #alastor is somehow desperately angry and desperately sad #and angrier still that vox gets to make him feel that way. #suddenly #alastor feels a pearl of absolute hatred form inside of him #he's never felt so strongly about something in his entire afterlife #if only my shitty little aces could communicate and stop being insane for one second. sigh.

[a2zillustration]

Buddy we literally JUST read a scroll about hubris AND you were just inspired about something called "Don't let history repeat itself," that 10 wis stat is really coming through.

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[[ All Croissant Adventures (chronological, desktop) ]]

[[ All Croissant Adventures (app) ]]

#ahhhh that insecurity is showing again croissant :) #I do enjoy reading people talk about the patience tav has to have with Gale as he keeps backsliding #meanwhile over here it's more like 'yeah of course the ambitious guy with the prestigious background was eventually going to abandon you' #I am once again making a long form comic for the other big romance scene and I am rubbing my little goblin hands together about it #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 spoilers #act III spoilers #croissant adventures #tav #gale #gale x tav #comics #WAIT I ALSO WANTED TO SAY #/LOVE/ HOW GALE CONSISTENTLY THROWS IN “FOR BOTH OF US” AS AN AFTERTHOUGHT #GOOD WRITING #breadweave #gale dekarios

[blvck-minou]

It's not a lake, it's an ocean

#black cat art #illustration #artists on tumblr #alan wake 2 #alan wake #saga anderson #aw2 #woao more Alan Wake content #in the form of a poster! #what a world #loved working on this assignment though #was very fun to use my obsession with this game #im thinking of making some of the objects stickers #i just liked some of these so much

[ryllen]

#twisted wonderland #twst #sebek zigvolt #twst yuu #twst grim #twst mc #fanart #genderbend #female sebek commonly always has ponytail #it's tempting to put female sebek in short skirt because she has long legs #but sebek is more like a long skirt kind of gal i think #i love seeing female nrc students tbh #some of the japanese twitter artists always spoil us so much with beautiful fresh girlies #they are still very highly attractive even in female forms #so unbeatable

[puppyeared]

meow

#i feel like i should have made his ears a little bigger in th first pic. maybe ill go back and edit it later #GET WRINKLED IDIOT #i first thought of drawing him as a sphinx cat bc i looked at his third eye like hm... if he had wrinkles he could hide his eye #its also very fun imagining him wearing head coverings and hoods cause hes so fucking nakey #kinda makes me wanna draw him more... sphinxes are fun to draw. i kinda wanna make a sphinx design now <- loves designing characters #a thought i had while drawing this is that if only few had seen narinder before (like the lamb and previous vessels) then not many would #know what he looks like. since hes supposed to be death and the only time you see him is when you die and pass on i guess?? #so i think it would be an interesting situation if the lamb just introduced narinder as some guy without telling anyone he is or used to be #the one who waits.. smth like a false idolatry situation so everyones like. oh wow our leader has been channeling the messages #of the one who waits for so long its almost like they have become death itself!! ^_^ and narinder is just. standing there #maybe if he gets enough power he can grow more eyes between his wrinkles like in his eldritch form. that would b cool #cult of the lamb #cotl #cotl narinder #cotl fanart #my art #myart #doodles #the one who waits

[thattheater-kid]

Figuring out that I was aplatonic made so much sense.

I’ve never made a friend on my own. All the friends I’ve made approached me and made me their friend, or I met through friends. I’ve never felt a desire to have friends. Even as a child I never felt I needed them, which made adults think there was something wrong with me and peers think I was stuck up, thinking I was “too good” to be friends with them. I was seen as a mean person. Adults pulled me aside to ask me why I was by myself, and I told them I didn’t like people. I told them I didn’t want to be around people. I said there were more important things to worry about. This got me sent to school counselors, who would ask me why I pushed people away and didn’t want friends and I didn’t have a reason. I enjoy my friends’ company, but I don’t miss them when I’m away. I never understood why it mattered so much, even as a kid. I always preferred to be alone, honestly. I thought for the longest time it was related to being autistic and ADHD, and maybe it is to an extent, but I simply never liked people and never had a desire to be friends with them.

I’d already known I was aroace. I never felt a desire to have sexual or romantic relationships. I never saw a point. I felt no attraction towards anyone and had no desire to. My life was enjoyable without it. Once I learned about aromanticism and asexuality, I understood that that was what I am.

However, aroace spaces put so much emphasis on platonic love that I never felt like I really belonged in the aroace community. I felt like I was still weird and gross. I felt like a freak who was destined to be alone, someone who could never be fulfilled and would always be missing something. I felt like a freak in my own community because I felt no love. I didn’t feel platonic love or attraction and frankly didn’t want to.

I found the word “aplatonic”. Someone who feels no platonic love or attraction. Now I understand that’s who I am, and that’s not a bad thing. My life is no worse without love. I’m not missing something. I still live a fulfilling life. I’m still human.

#by extent I also feel no desire to form queer platonic relationships with anyone #this is no hate to aroace people who do feel platonic love and do value it #I just don’t #and feel that we shouldn’t put so much emphasis on it #and use it as some way to justify being aroace #as if feeling no love is bad #aroace #aromantic #asexual #aplatonic #triple a battery #aroaceapl #aspec

[omg-snakes]

A sincere thanks to those of you who are sharing your snake data. Here's a little taste of what @talesfromtreatment and I have been cooking up, and this isn't even the really interesting stuff! This is only one week's worth of data capture!! Imagine what we could do with even more!

If you haven't submitted your corn snake's age, weight, and a top-down photo of them with a ruler yet, it's not too late! It's probably never going to be too late! Take the anonymous survey via Google Forms, linked below:

https://forms.gle/QtAwmiFa6fpBewFs8

Please join our body of community scientists and help us be petty in the most productive way imaginable. Your data will be used to make a gift for all corn snake keepers and breeders, present and future.

A project of this size has never before been attempted, or at least never published, and this is a super awesome opportunity for all of us to learn together!

Edit: swapped out the graph because the title said, "Width" when it should've said "Weight." Sorry!

#Okay like I love you all but some of y'all got some fat-assed snakes #It's okay tho because the current available resources are woefully lacking #That's literally why we're doing this #for real #science #commit science #community science #snake #snakes #reptile #reptiles #reptiblr #corn snake #corn snakes #give us your data #signal boost #google forms #snake husbandry #snake keeping #snake feeding #snake growth #corn snake husbandry #we're doing something nobody has done before and it's wild