many fluffy thoughts about ran haitani for your comfort and mine
girl help, i-i- *vomits ran fluff onto your dash*
What’s it like having Ran as your partner? Gender-neutral HCs
Ran doesn’t fall so easily but when he does, you’ll have yourself a doting, caring partner who loves to pamper you.
➼ Ran would want you to look your best, and not only so you’d look good standing next to him! (lol) Because he loves you, he’d want you to feel confident in the way you look. He might take you to his regular salon, offer style advice, or even introduce you to a skincare or haircare routine if you don’t already have one. Before you go out into the streets together, he’d tell you how good you look and remind you to keep your chin up. After all, someone like you, who managed to steal his heart, should stand proud.
➼ I think he’ll be the type to wipe the corner of your mouth if you missed a stain on it, fix your hair if a strand is out of place, smooth down your clothes, fix your collar or tie if it’s askew, etc. (He definitely used to do this to Rindou)
➼ He thinks about you a lot so that when he finds an outfit from a magazine that would look great on you, or smells a perfume that screams “you” to him, he’d want to show you! All he needs is the slightest sign of approval–-maybe your face brightening up? Perhaps a small smile? Maybe you looked at it for more than ten seconds? Before you know it, he’s already bought it for you.
➼ Shopping with Ran, huh? This gives you the privilege of seeing him try on clothes! He’ll ask you what you think, or to pick out stuff you’d like to see him wearing. Of course, he’d want to buy clothes for you too. If you ever had the experience of your mom making you come back to the fitting room again and again because she found some great clothes for you, here it is again! Except it’s not your mom anymore but your partner.
➼ If you’re not well-off, Ran would spoil you to death. He’d want you to experience all the luxuries that he and his brother do. You get to have your dates at fancy fine-dining restaurants. You receive only the most expensive chocolates. Your wardrobe is slowly filling up with designer clothing. He would give you the world as long as you stay with him.
➼ Relaxing with Ran is always a treat. Imagine being pampered by Ran in his room: he is softly humming as he covers your face in an expensive mask. Him brushing or massaging oils into your hair. His touches are so gentle, and it makes you sleepy. All while doing these, a perfectly serene smile is on his face. (He rarely ever gets to do this on Rindou, so he is happy to have you.)
➼ There are days when you both just want to chill on their balcony wearing bathrobes, sipping wine (or any drink of your choice) out of fancy glasses. Your usual topics of conversation are celebrities, fashion, art, and maybe even philosophy! Ran is interested in hearing your opinions on different topics as well as sharing his own. If anyone tries to disturb your time together, they will face Ran’s wrath. His time with you is precious!
➼ Ran would be the #1 reason you’re late to anything because his bed is just so comfy, he’s so comfy, and honestly, how could you leave that pretty sleeping princess behind? If he wakes up to you leaving the bed, he will try to pull you back in. He’ll say “5 more minutes” while wrapping himself tighter around you.
➼ As his partner, you must laugh at his dad jokes. He loves puns, so come up with some of your own, won't you? Aside from dad jokes, his humor can be outdated. He’s the type of person who’d use a 2016 meme in 2020. Sometimes, you or Rindou need to explain certain memes or trends to him. It’s cute. He’s cute.
➼ To Rindou, you are a godsend. With you around, his brother is less of a killjoy (his words). He can party just a bit longer and be as loud with his friends as he wants. If he’s lucky, you manage to get his brother out of the house for maybe a night or two. It’s also fun for him to see his brother go so soft with you.
➼ Ran is anxious whenever you hang out with people he doesn't know. He would want to meet your friends, and if any of them feel off to him, he would tell you. (His intuition is pretty good, after all). He won't ask you to stop hanging out with them but will remind you to be cautious. It's not out of possessiveness but worry about your safety. Your boyfriend, after all, rules Roppongi. People are always out to exploit his weaknesses.
➼ If you somehow piss him off, you have to wait for him to come to you. If for example, you’re spending the night at their residence, you have to stay on the couch before he allows you back in his room. In the middle of the night, you might feel yourself being gently shaken awake by Ran (it’s a bit scary because his hair-covered face is the first thing you see) who wants to invite you back into his room. You’re forgiven.
➼ If he’s pissed you off, he’d also stay away for a while. Sooner or later, he’ll take out a cake or tub of ice cream with two spoons and sit with you so you can share it. If he sees you busy working on something, he’ll approach with a mug of a hot drink he prepared for you and a snack before sitting beside you. The apology comes after a long moment of silence, and things are okay again. Humbling himself and saying sorry was hard for him at first, but it got easier because he loves you.
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Scriddler fic recommendations!!!
Stay (2017) by iammemyself
Rating: General
49,873 words, 11/11 chapters (discontinued)
Arkhamverse
After Arkham Knight, Jonathan and Edward move to Canada together, where the full weight of Edward's grief crashes down on the both of them.
This fic is fucking miserable in the best way possible. It feels so grey and depressing like almost the entire time even with its ups and downs. Things get better, but it's fucking hard. Legit among my favorite fics. Also Jon's so obscenely old here I love it lmfao. (There's also a Stay (2016) I haven't actually looked at, might be a prequel or smthn idk)
I'm With You by nonbinaryspock
Rating: Mature
50,684 words, 35/35 chapters
Jonathan and Edward rekindle their somewhat messy relationship from their college years. Things are still a bit messy but they've at least got some hindsight.
Hella angsty, they're both so horribly dysfunctional <3 (specifically Jonathan will just say/think the absolute wildest shit and then just go on like that's normal). I really just love how visceral their emotions can be.
Runs In The Family by ChaoticMimzy
Rating: Mature
8,703 words, 5/5 chapters
Edward's father dies and he goes to his funeral (solely to be there for his sister, mind you) where he grapples with past trauma and catholic guilt.
Very very rogues podcast coded (highest compliment). It's mostly Edward-centric and doesn't focus on the scriddler too much but it's still worth a read. Edward's rage towards his childhood circumstances is so potent and agonizing I love it so much. He should get to kill god a little bit imo
(More below)
Let me play you a song on my violin by batmanforeverlol
Rating: Teen
7,206 words, 1/1 chapters
Ghost AU. Edward is a retired criminal turned private investigator who finds himself running through a cemetery, where he meets a man playing a violin.
Ngl I cried super hard reading this but it's also one of my absolute favorites. Why would you write this? Why would you hurt me in this way? (It's really sweet but also really fucking sad, you should read it. Share my pain)
Terminal by iammemyself, promethea (Aerosol)
Rating: General
7,073 words, 1/1 chapters
Edward gets brain cancer again, this time the Lazarus pits aren't gonna help him.
As you could imagine, this fic is just sad from start to finish. I cried so fucking much reading it its not even funny.
He Just Likes The Rush by Human_Resourccs
Rating: General
16,072 words, 9/9 chapters
Jonathan's thrill-seeking brings him some interesting company. (Or, as I know it: the fic where a fucking spider lives in Jonathan's hair for months and Edward still lets him touch him. If that's not love I don't know what is)
Sapiophile by XavIniesta685
Rating: Mature
17,529 words, 3/3 chapters
The Moon Is Not Made Of Cheese by Stry_Shttu
Jonathan has given up in every sense and is about to leave Gotham until a series of events change his mind. A lot of "falling in love within a day" fics can feel kinda forced but this one flows really naturally.
Rating: Teen
7,820 words, 1/1 chapters
Arkhamverse
Edward is lonely, Jonathan goes to see him while also being Jason Todd's really lame dad. A good mix of sweet and silly.
The Boy With The Thorn In His Side by 30PacketsofKetchup
Rating: Teen
21,542 words, 8/? chapters (this fic hasn't been updated in like 5 years so be ready for that specific brand of agony)
Teenager AU. Jonathan meets the mildly annoying new boy in town and they bond.
I looove this fic so much I'm absolutely heartbroken that it wasn't ever finished. Idk the vibes are nice and I love how flustered young Jon gets when he's got a crush.
South of Hell by nonbinaryspock
Rating: Teen
14,194 words, 35/35 chapters
Teenager AU. No one in their awful little town likes Edward or Jonathan, but they've at least got eachother. Very southern gothic.
Exit Wounds by nonbinaryspock
Rating: Teen
18,066 words, 38/38 chapters
Demon/supernatural AU. Edward is a private investor and his demon ex-boyfriend suddenly shows up after 5 years in need of a place to stay. Edward is thoroughly unimpressed.
I'm in love with this AU big time, it's got some pretty neat world building. I also love how distinctive the characterizations here are. BAH I'm not great at describing but it's very angsty and good.
Frighteningly Unprofessional by bookynerdgoblin
Rating: Mature
28,412 words, 11/11 chapters
One of Jonathan's students knows about his unethical experiments, however instead of reporting him, he offers to help in exchange for his partnership. Things spiral from there. Edward is purposefully being super obvious and Jonathan talks to his cat like a person.
Words by scarecrowv
Rating: General
4,651 words, 1/1 chapters
Edward's daughter keeps calling Jon "mama" and he has no idea how to handle it, aka psychology professor Dr Jonathan Crane talks to a 2 year old like an adult.
A Case Study in Step-Parenting by Ifthinkerwrites
Rating: General
16,053 words, 5/5 chapters
Another lil scriddler family fic, Jonathan navigates step-parenthood :)
Sitzfleisch by SproxGrail
Rating: Mature
1,205 words, 1/? chapters
Jonathan is living in Edward's walls and talks about him like a little freak. I need this fic to update again please please please it's so creepy I'm in love with it
Some series to look at as well!
Memoryverse by Enigmatic_Robin
Rating: General
15,393 words, 11 works
A bit more of a psychological horror/thriller than a romance. Jonathan is manipulating Edward into complete dependency. It seems easy while Edward is in love with him, but he'd better watch out for when that veil slips.
Scriddler Family AU by Enigmatic_Robin
Rating: General
17,722 words, 9 works
Scarecrow and Riddler end up raising Stephanie Brown and Tim Drake. And all the shenanigans that come with that.
Love Me Dead by lymongrab
Rating: Explicit
25,624 words, 6 works
Kinda just a nice progression in Jonathan and Edward's relationship with some added spice here and there. Mostly pretty sweet.
Arkhamverse by iammemyself
Rating: General
354,608 words, 28 works
In which Edward and Jonathan's relationship is a bit complicated, but Edward is also a robot dad!!
(Everything from here is nsfw centric)
This section would be longer but i actually found out the person who wrote some nsfw fics i really liked was actually a proshipper weirdo so I'm not including those. Why can't people be normal
Kiss The Go-Goat by korereapers
Rating: Explicit
5,203 words, 1/1 chapters
Demon AU. Edward summons a demon and gets a little carried away
Shout out to this fic for getting me into Ghost, the only band I ever listen to now lmfao. Anyway I'm a big sucker for anything involving monster/demon/creature!Jon
Connected by korereapers
Rating: Explicit
6,458 words, 1/1 chapters
A hookup gets wayyy more emotional than expected. But, y'know, they're not in love or anything. Right?
Comfort by curiouscorvid (prometheanTactician)
Rating: Explicit
4,866 words, 1/1 chapters
Mad Max AU. Edward is traversing the wasteland, where he finds and helps a desperate escapee.
I've found that Mad Max AUs are always so sad no matter what even though the movie itself is kinda silly lmfao.
worldly pleasures by leetheshark
Rating: Explicit
3,227 words, 1/1 chapters
Arkhamverse
Jonathan doesn't really know how to handle any sensation that isn't painful.
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PRELUDE: ON CONTAINING MULTITUDES. // c!quackity poetry.
(click for full images and better quality)
text below :) feel free to reblog !!
PRELUDE: ON CONTAINING MULTITUDES.
the moon burns our souls
and the wind makes us sound distressed
MARBLE STATUE, WINE BOTTLE,
both some sort of fine-something
we begin to dig a HOLE in the GROUND
our time capsule more of a memory burial
basking in idiotic fantasies,
sometimes verging on PRAYER
we lift our hands and pray over your body
IT MAKES US FEEL ROTTEN!
the devil is lonely
we kicked out the devil and it misses us
it keeps begging to be let back,
for us to let it in
it’s waiting in the DARK
it’s waiting for your veins to feel a flash of life
god loves you
but not enough to save you
I WAS MY FIRST VICTIM
— AND NOW I AM MY LAST HOPE
places where reality feels ALTERED,
liminal earth, holy innocence, gentle sin,
eerie, uncanny, watch me BLEED
you can feel yourself getting SICKER
an in-between state of mind
uncomfortable and disorienting
TRAPPED IN YOUR HALLWAY,
can you hear the BUZZING?
maybe it sounds like SWALLOWING GLASS!
or HUGGING GOD!
or SPILLING ACID!
or STARTING A WAR!
or PAINTING OUTSIDE THE LINES!
. . .
well it doesn’t matter in the end
because it’s all suffocating
and your throat burns and your head hurts
( you have felt what it feels like
to be a desperate animal, is what i say,
with different words
DESPERATION has seeped into your veins
through countless sharp WOUNDS,
and it has made your CANINES LONGER
the insides of your THIGHS ROUGHER
your hair all the while whiter
all of your body has adapted
to survive a catastrophic flood
but it never came
and now all you have is an ark )
like a dog with a bird at your door
i will bury you in the garden,
laying you where you are LOVED
like a dog taught to bite
i tripped on the urge to feel ALIVE
to bloom is to kill and to be slain
let it out and hear it BELLOW,
let it SHRED through the cartilage of your ribs
let it feel like SWITCHING OFF a light
— the way night shreds moonlight
RELISH EVERY ACHE
i’ll eat you whole
i’ll give you a NAME i see on a GRAVE
JANE DOE TURNED MARY SUE
wound and dagger!
blow and cheek!
members and wheel!
victim and executioner!
the moral of the story is that
i am going to be your burning star
and you are going to be my flickering lightbulb
and i will GUT you if i NEED to
i will carve my way OUT
with only my TEETH
. . .
YOU CAN ALSO HAVE MY HEART
IF YOU HAVE THE STOMACH TO TAKE IT
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