#i can't event die wtf | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rikan-oo · 3 months

Text

So I was thinking about creating a loose list of recs for ORV fans or, in other words, "If you liked ORV, you also may like this." I decided to add things less obvious because I think people already read works like Trash of Count's Family, etc.

Princess Tutu

“The beginning of a story is a sudden event; the start, a happy accident, the end, the fate for which it's meant. A story that never ends is a sad fate.”

Let's start with Princess Tutu (PT), anime, not manga because they're different. I watched it about a week before ORV and after finishing both, I can't help but notice their similarities. However, meanwhile, ORV is about the relationship between the reader, the author, and the protagonist, and PT is more about the relationship between the author and their creation: the story and its characters. Don't let the name fool you, don't be like me. It's much darker than I expected from this style and genre. Be ready for angst.

Plot: Ahiru is a small duck in a pond. One day she notices a dancing boy with a very sad gaze. Boy every day goes to dance near the pond and the little duck is completely mesmerized by him. She can't help but notice sadness and loneliness in his dance. She wants to make this boy smile and at that moment a writer Droselmeir appears. He tells her that she could do this by collecting shards of his broken heart but under some conditions. He gives her a magic pendant that can transform her, first into an ordinary human girl, then into the graceful ballerina Princess Tutu, a fictional character from the tale that was doomed for tragedy in the original story.

Later we find out that this city is kinda enchanted by Droselmeir's tale (reverse isekai before it became mainstream) and some characters broke out of the tale like the boy by the lake - Mytho or Raven - the villain of this tale. Tale elements blend interestingly in the city and its residents.

Also, I have no idea wtf is happening with the main characters' dynamic in this complicated rectangle, but there is no straight explanation for this.

I can't help but see some parallels between Mytho - KDJ, Fakir - both YJH & HSY, Ru - HSY, and Droselmeir - Dokkaebi. I love how the story describes characters doomed by narrative and the struggles of being a writer. Also, all of these subtle references to fairytales at the beginning of the episode? Love it. I bet there are more references for the ballet part, but I probably didn't get it. I gently encourage you to check it out. (Definitely not gently, I'm as desperate as Kim Dokja trying to advertise TWSA to other people)

“May those who accept their fate be granted Happiness, may those who defy their fate be granted Glory.”

Miss not Sidekick

It's a much simpler read, just to chill and have fun while laughing at Mc shenanigans. Plot: Typical isekai story, where Mc is a fan of the internet novel of the reverse harem genre. When isekaied decided to invent popcorn and enjoy full time 4d immersion in the story.

There are not so many similarities in themes like with Princess Tutu, but more the role of MC – Latte as reader. I liked how she continued to behave like a spectator of a story inside Isekai world, treating it like she's inside a special 4D theater, not existing in this world as a part of it, until she couldn't.

Until her 4th wall is shattered (*badabums* it's a bad pun, she doesn't have it like kdj) and she realizes she could actually die, (quite shocking I know). Also, MC invents BL for this world and converts other people into it. Overall, the art style is different from other isekai romfant and it's something you need time to get used to, but after a while, you understand it suits perfectly for the narrative and silly tone of the comic.

Inso's Law or My Life as an Internet Novel

I feel like it's more reverse isekai similar to orv, where the story becomes part of your life. But if in KDJ's case, this transition is obvious and life-crashing, then in MC's situation is really creepy. It blends seamlessly into her regular life making her feel insane because everything remains the same except having a whole new friend who behaves like your bestie and a different school, where everything starts to feel like a romantic novel full of clichés. MC like KDJ is also unreliable in her perception of others here and thinks her knowledge of clichés like a reader-outsider makes her more omnipotent than she really is. Too bad they used 3 person POV, so it's really obvious, but funny nevertheless. (One of the cases where she thinks one of her classmates is a girl pretending to be a boy cause of some kind of cliché family drama, when in fact it's just a boy and I find it funny how this classmate looks like Jang Hayoung twin and have similar fate, poor souls) guess she also has similarities in her character to pre-scenario or regular life KDJ. They both seem to have this introverted avoidance type of personality. I'm curious about supernatural events happening in manhwa and I hope we'll get some explanation for it.

Pandora Hearts

Nice little thing with funny and cute tea parties that everyone would enjoy. 😍

SHHH, nothing about the plot. Let it be a small surprise for you.

It's all vibes and similar tropes now, folks.

Like dynamic between the main trio: Gilbert - Oz - Alice YJH - KDJ - HSY. Also this time loop thing? Daddy issues? Self-sacrifice as a form of love? Ugh. (Also, I need this scene with Oz and Brake "Where in the world are you?" But with KDJ. Maybe I even draw it).

It's all for now, maybe I'll write more. Please share the recs if you have them!

#whoever readed till the end #thank you #omniscient reader's viewpoint #orv #omniscient reader webtoon #kim dokja #miss not so sidekick #princess tutu #orv spoilers #inso's law #my life as an internet novel #pandora hearts #it was in my drafts since October

64 notes · View notes

nocreativityfornames · 5 months

Text

More detailed:

Zombie Apocalypse AU: self explanatory, it's the end of the world, the brothers are humans and not actually related ( apart from the twins and Lucifer and Satan maybe ) and they just come together with MC as a group to survive together. Bonus points if some of them die throughout the event. Yeah, that's right, I want that ANGST. ( Solmare will never give it to us though... )

MC gets sick and the brothers have to take care of them: already talked about this in this post :3

Lucifer is out for the weekend, chaos ensues in the house: classic movie trope, the dad leaves and everyone's excited to do whatever the fuck they want and throw a massive party in the house, only for the parent to send a text saying they're coming back earlier than expected. CHAOS.

The bros become humans for a few days/a week: they're hit with some spell, idk, but become a human for a limited amount of time and have to learn what it's like to live as a human. ( I CRAVE for this to have a scene where Satan gets a paper cut and is just blown away because wtf, HUMANS ARE THAT FRAGILE?!?! ) They're all grow a massive respect for MC at the end, because how the fuck do you live like this??

MC becomes an actual sheep: could be another animal too, but I chose sheep because you know, MC is represented by a sheep. It'd just be a cute scenario, and funny too. Give it to me!

Satan & MC bring a cat home and attempt to hide it from the others: idk, could be satan or mc that finds a hurt street kitten, so they bring it home with them and immediately text the other like: "HELP, EMERGENCY SITUATION, CAT INVOLVED!!"

They keep the kitten in one of their rooms and hide it from the others, but slowly, one by one the brothers start finding out about it, and OH BOY DO THEY GET ATTACHED.

The last one who finds out is Lucifer, obviously, but at that point everyone has already grown heart eyes for the tiny thing, and he can't say no to keeping it because all his 6 little brothers + MC are pleading him to let the cat stay and his heart can't take it. WE ADOPT A CAT, FINALLY!

( this one is just what I have as canon for my mc, honestly XD )

#om writers from tumblr feel free to take any of these and turn into a fic because I'd READ THE SHIT out of any of them #especially the satan & mc adopt a cat one because it's far too precious to me #also the apocalypse one because tlou is one of my favorites games ever and a zombie apocalypse au with the bros would break my heart #BUT IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE #obey me shall we date #obey me nightbringer #omnb #omswd #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me satan #obey me #obey me polls #☙ no creativity for names ✾

74 notes · View notes

cairavende · 6 months

Text

Worm Arc 11 Interludes thoughts:

AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Ok. Just in order I think. Sorry for the chaos.

Started off with puppies. I was happy.

Then the puppies started getting a little more violent than needed. I was less happy.

Then Victoria got clowned on a little and I was little bit more happy.

Then the unkillable naked zebra lady showed up everything kinda went downhill. For everyone.

Bitch do not join the supervillain serial killer group, please and thank you.

Seriously though, The Siberian is a bit scary. Just, completely invincible as far as anyone can tell. And super strong.

Theo is having a bad day. And unless someone takes care of Jack Slash for him he's gonna have a bad few years.

Jack Slash is such a poser oh my god. Dude. Come one. You aren't all that.

Also. Jack. Do not toss a loaded baby! That baby had a full diaper. You toss that baby and you are liable to have a containment breach. Speaking from experience, you do not want a containment breach. (Also just don't throw babies of course.)

I hope Theo gets cool powers and is able to become a super amazing hero like he dreams of. On the plus side, probably gonna be lots of opportunities for trigger events coming up. On the minus side, he didn't trigger when Jack Slash was planning on killing him so I don't know if he's gonna be able to.

They were obviously going to go for Labyrinth. She has such amazing powers for mass terror. Though I guess Burnscar never tried to actually recruit her. I assume that was the plan though.

Also Burnscar needs to stop excusing her actions. Just be evil or don't be evil. You don't get to be evil and say it's not your fault (that sure will come up again in these interludes).

I fucking LOVED the description of how Labyrinths powers work. Just the details of everything. So good!

Fucking Colin. Of course they had to go for you. Why can't you just go away and leave my robot daughter alone?

Mannequin is fucking WILD. Like, god damn. Those are sure choices you made. Helps you be creepy as shit though. And get through air vents.

Mannequin writing out "U ME" to Pocketknife Man by laying keyboard keys down on the table one at a time has cursed meet-cute energy.

In the end, Colin survives cause my robot daughter saves him. And I guess she's gonna tell him the truth about being an AI. Fiiiiiiine. I will be polite to Colin if he comes over to dinner. He still needs to apologize to my other daughter though.

Also I'm sure glad the Slaughterhouse Nine won't have any use for the magic pocketknife that can cut through anything that Mannequin took. No worries at all I'm sure. It won't do jack shit for them. Might as well just slash the idea and toss the knife out.

Cool. Some Nazis died. That's great!

Not enough though. Disappointed in Shatterbird.

But if one good thing can come of this whole Slaughterhouse Nine thing, maybe Hookwolf can die. I'm not holding my breath though.

Shatterbird has a very interesting power set. Being specifically glass focused like that. Definitely can see how she would terrorize a city.

Dinah PoV. DINAH POV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok well first off, I obviously hated Coil for Dinah already. Enough that I don't really know if the Dinah PoV can technically make me hate him more. But that said, I hate him more. WTF.

The description of her power was so NEAT though! Had a minor moment of "oh hey this paragraph of this precog talking about her power works inside her head is an almost perfect description of how my brain works" which was wild. I don't actually get to see the future though, which is a major difference.

She can actually just full blow see a possible future holy shit! Wow. Like it hurts and she hates it but it's still crazy.

Also I guessed that Crawler was going to come for Traveler in a Vault (that is Noelle's cape name until I am told different) after the Bitch interlude. I was very happy I got that right since I really knew almost nothing about either.

So Crawler just basically can't die and gets stronger every time he gets hurt. I wonder how long it will take him to reach Endbringer level power?

And Traveler in a Vault is just a large monster that is always hungry and can be driven to the point of eating people. That sucks a lot for her.

Also Leviathan came after her too huh? Well that's probably fine and won't matter in the future.

Regent's sister is worse than he is. That's impressive! Like, not good impressive. But impressive.

Getting real close to the "can't exist" physic power set. I guess it's not quite it though.

She should keep a better eye on her phone battery.

AMY DALLON! I knew it would be you.

I knew you were destined to be a tragedy from the moment I met you. You were always going to become a villain. So once I knew the Nine were recruiting it was a guarantee that you'd be recruited.

Specifically, that you'd be recruited by Bonesaw. She is an artist and obviously she is obsessed over the art you could make together.

Holy shit though that chapter.

Lets see. FUCK CAROL. Victoria gets some excuses, she's a kid, she's following her mom's example, etc. But FUCK CAROL. You are partially responsible for what Amy is about to become.

Despite being terrified, Amy seemed to have a dark fascination with everything Bonesaw was doing and saying. Really listened as Bonesaw explained things.

The more detailed view of what Amy's power does is crazy. She really can do just about anything to someone.

“Why not fix your dad?” is where Bonesaw won. It's about 3/5 of the way through the chapter. And she won at that point. That was the killing blow. The rest of the chapter, the remaining 3.5k or so words, is watching Amy bleed out to drive the point home. It is Panacea's death monologue. It is beautiful and tragic and amazing.

All that said, since she is losing anyway, is it bad for me to want more of Bonesaw's notes? SHE HAS LORE! GIVE IT TO ME!

Dad at least seems pretty good. He made the perfect response after getting healed. Unfortunately she was already gone.

AND THERE IT IS. THERE IS THE THAT FINAL STEP. Fucking rewire your adopted sisters mind to have romantic feelings for you. No you don't get to say it was an accident! You chose to do it. Holy shit Amy. You are going to be an amazing (terrifying) villain.

Callback to Burnscar and blaming her power for her actions.

If Worm was a Disney movie Amy would end up with the best song, 100%. Hellfire or similar levels.

#Worm #Worm Web Serial #Parahumans #Cairavende reads Worm #The Slaughterhouse Nine #Panacea #Amy Dallon #Holy shit there was so much in those interludes!#Bonesaw #Jack Slash #Crawler #Shatterbird #Burnscar #Mannequin #The Siberian #Cherish #The Amy chapter was just so good. The fact that I basically knew it was coming and knew what was going to happen just made it even better.#New Wave was already considering disbanding. I assume after this they crack like an egg.#I'm a little worried about some of my babies though. Bitch. Labyrinth. Hmm I guess mostly just them.#Seriously though the Amy chapter is possibly my favorite chapter in Worm so far. Definitely favorite to live read.#Ever live read Worm so fucking well that a cute girl admits to having a crush on you?#Though despite what the Nine said I don't expect everyone who doesn't join to die. Some probably will die though.#And all that information to process. Stuff from Dinah and stuff from Bonesaw and stuff from Labyrinth!#Oh and I'm sure it's nothing to worry about that Dinah said 2 years is when Jack Slash might trigger the end of the world #and 2 years is the timeline Jack gave Theo to get ready to fight him #I'm sure that won't mean anything.#Oh god and Traveler in a Vault (TiaV)! She is more than just a monster. She is important and I want to know more!!!!!!!!!

88 notes · View notes

darthstitch · 2 years

Text

Okay, so I really REALLY need to get this off my chest

I mean, we all make jokes about Dream being an ABSOLUTE fucking disaster when it comes to his lovelife and yes, how can you not, when bullshit like this is CANON:

I remember reading this for the first time and my reaction was ABSOLUTELY WTF.

Because, the last time I checked, Dream of the Endless was just busy doing his usual Dreamlord things, getting closure with Alianora in A Game of You, and generally just being his usual mysterious broody self. Like, normal for Dream, okay?

I even went back and double checked to see if I somehow missed an issue, a storyline, something because WHO THE HELL was this person who broke Dream's heart?

And of course, we know what happens next, right? Dream runs off on a road trip with baby sister Delirium, to find their lost brother Destruction, on an adventure that is simultaneously hilarious and horrifying. On the one hand - Dream and Delirium bonding! Dream learning not to be such an arse at the art of being a big brother! On the other hand - ABSOLUTE FUCKING DESTRUCTION. PEOPLE DYING. I kid you not - the horror and the humor are like side by side in this.

But in the end, Dream ends up having to spill family blood in order to find Destruction. And that sets off the events of the Kindly Ones and Dream's death and Daniel Hall rising in his place as the new Dream of the Endless.

Years later, I realized this was basically an elaborate suicide process. It wasn't that Dream had this great love that shattered his heart and made him want to die - we didn't even know who this goddamn mystery lover was unless you picked up on the hints. It was just one trauma (Burgess and the glass fishbowl) after another (Rose the Vortex and Desire's bullshit) and losing Orpheus in such a horrific way. It was just absolutely the last straw for him. Dream must have figured he was like, "Nope, I'm done. I'm noping outta here. I can't do this anymore."

I absolutely did not see this coming.

THESSALY?!!!

THIS GODDAMN IMMORTAL WITCH TERF THESSAY WAS THE ONE WHO BROKE DREAM'S HEART?

THE FUCK?!!!

There was only ONE GODDAMN HINT that I got that she was even REMOTELY attracted to Dream, okay? And it was here:

I'm sorry, Thessaly, unlike you, I wholly EMBRACE the fact that Dream of the Endless is kilig-inducing. Fuck you very much, okay?

So it kind of makes me think how the Sandman TV team is going to handle this once the next seasons are greenlit. Are we going to have Thessaly/Dream, the most toxic goddamn disaster relationship ever? How's that going to play out? Are viewers going to be left scratching their heads like we comic readers were?

I'm just hoping we don't end up with Dreamling replacing the Thessaly/Dream shit as the tragedy romance. That one's gonna break me. Nope, I can't. I wrote my own take on that in my previous post and I'M ALREADY READY TO FLING MYSELF INTO THE SUN.

What makes this even worse is that the TV version of Dream is even more lovable than the comic one. The more I rewatch it, the more I'm like: "Shit, he's changing fast, more like Daniel/Dream than the bastard Morpheus could be." So yes, Sandman Netflix team, congratulations we are latching on to this version of Morpheus and keeping him!

In the meantime, the quest for fix-it fan fiction continues!

#the sandman #dream of the endless #thessaly #hob gadling #dreamling #meta

436 notes · View notes

duckapus · 4 months

Note

Random Streamer Ash thoughts.

The entire Charmander situation was streamed. Hell, even the down time in the Pokémon Center because might as well do a chill stream. Or, at least that was the intention before everyone learned that not did Charmander's trainer abandon him, but doesn't even care that if Charmander is still following his orders, he could DIE due to the rain. Anyways the rescue happens and the only reason Ash didn't end his stream during it and the time waiting in the reception room is because he knew his chat would kill him if they didn't learn if Charmander was fine as soon as he did.

By the time Sinnoh is over and done with chat just wants Ash to take a vacation because seriously WTF WAS EVEN HAPPENING IN SINNOH THEY SAW IT THROUGH A STREAM AND THEIR STILL CONFUSED-

Also there's a new appreciation for the Darkrai species after the events of The Rise of Darkrai. Same with Giratina. Dialga, Palkia, Shaymin and Arceus are on thin ice though. Albeit Arceus is a lesser extent because of the near death trauma.

Oh yeah Damien ends up in some Real Deep Shit, specifically Real Deep Legal Shit because there is no way that wouldn't count as criminal negligence at best and his confession and the resulting consequences for Charmander were all broadcast live. Not stopping the stream was half Ash being too focused on Charmander to even notice it was still running, half the rest of the group making damn sure they had the Receipts on Damien.

Thankfully for everyone's sanity there does seem to be some kind of gap between Sinnoh and Unova in canon as far as I can tell, and even with Immediate Zekrom it's at least more chill by comparison.

...And Then Suddenly Kalos (:

Yeah, a lot of the typical Pariah Pokemon (particularly the more "evil" legendaries but also 'mons like Absol or Venipede) get seen in a new light thanks to Ash. And the legendaries that actively cause problems or are just assholes definitely end up on a few shitlists. Though some of the Sinnoh ones are a bit complicated in regards to actually showing up in the streams at all because he can't exactly get an internet connection in the distant past or a collapsing space-time distortion bubble, plus the fact that nobody in the repaired timeline where Arceus didn't Start Shit remembers the Arceus Starts Shit timeline. The wifi does somehow work in the Distortion World though.

Also in defense of Shaymin as a whole it's just that one Shaymin that's a prick. Every other Shaymin both in the series and in that specific movie are perfectly pleasant and actually fit their title as The Gratitude Pokemon from what I remember.

#streamer ash au #pokemon damien #charmander #ash ketchum #darkrai #giratina #dialga #palkia #shaymin #arceus #absol #venipede #also if he's warned ahead of time he makes sure that the various secret groves and sacred locations and such don't get doxxed #if it happens by accident because he randomly stumbled into some seemingly innocuous cave he can't exactly take that back #these are LIVEstreams after all #fortunately most of the time when he accidentally ends up somewhere secret he's also so lost that his viewers wouldn't know where it->#->is anyway

24 notes · View notes

driaswrld · 6 months

Text

iv. catharsis.

part of : the letters sealed and unsent event.

— from : geto suguru

the world feels so quiet.

do you know, what it's like to hear everything and nothing at the same time?

thirteen months, fifteen days, twelve hours and thirty seven seconds. the ugliness of this world was nothing to me. i made a choice to save others, to be the defining line between whatever good is left in this world and the sickness that threatens it.

i loved you through it. so take the thought from your brain. i know you've heard it from the others by now, haven't you? they'll tell you what i did and i know you won't believe it, you'll slam your door, you'll dial my number, just — it's all true.

i woke up slumped against a bathroom sink, mirror foggy and hands still bloody.

i didn't feel anything.

two minutes, forty-nine seconds. i listened to them scream, i watched them cry, plead and make promises to whatever god they could.

i wanted to scream like that too. don't i have more reasons to scream? don't i have more reasons to be on my face, mouth full of dirt, caked in blood and begging? don't i deserve to live?

two seconds out of forty-nine i thought of you, of what you would say, of what you would do when you heard what i'd done.

and then i felt everything.

the adrenaline was so high — the blood pumping through my veins coursed through me like a drug. it was a catharsis. i wanted them to feel my pain. i wanted them to hurt. i wanted the whole world to stop turning.

in those two seconds i knew still, some people shouldn't be allowed to live. i'm no deity, no oracle, no poet —

but this world is a disease. there are people who treat it and others who spread it. i'm making a choice, to cull them like i should've from the beginning. how could i have sat with you longer, knowing our fates were written already?

don't make that face. i can feel you, even now i can... just don't. you doubted me just now — don't do that.

i know it won't work. i know how it sounds.

but i have to try.

what has all of this been for if not to end it all? why are we running in circles? why am i waiting to die? why am i waiting to be taken from you?

i'm not asking you to come with me. i wouldn't want you to.

i didn't do this because of you. this is for me. love can't save us, that much is true — but that doesn't mean i never loved you. that doesn't mean i don't still love you.

i don't regret what i did. i never will.

if i regret anything, i regret not holding you tighter. i regret not kissing you longer.

and even in some twisted way, i regret not grabbing more of your stuff. the polaroids in my pants pocket are past crumpled, that sweater you like so much is shoved somewhere with everything else.

i'm sorry i took some of your hair clips. i didn't know what to do, i just took whatever i could.

if i knew then what i know now, i'd burn you into my flesh. and it's funny, because it's not like you aren't already.

don't mourn me, please. it's all i ask of you. scream, be rageful, be hurt. cry if you need to. just don't mourn me.

i'm never apart from you. so don't grieve me like some stranger. i'm here. i'm yours.

don't mourn me while my heart still beats for you.

and please,

don't forget me.

i was a kid when i first loved you, and when i die, i'll die knowing i loved you.

tell the world you loved me too.

— for knives 💌 (@todorokies)

there's no way you aren't a masochist knives pls wtf i broke my own heart (made this less poetic so i could rlly get into his personal emotions and damn)

#lsu ✉️#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #geto suguru x reader

44 notes · View notes

desertfangs · 4 months

Note

Can I ask 1. (Canon I outright reject), 3. (Obscure headcanon) and 8. (Unpopular opinion about them) for Armand and Daniel?😊

I hope you have a nice end of the year!🥰

Send me character asks. Specify a character or I will default to Daniel.

Thank you! I hope you also have a lovely end of the year and a wonderful start to the new one! (I can't believe it's almost 2024 wtf.)

1. Canon I outright reject

Night Island is still around & it's still owned wholly by Armand and Daniel (though it's definitely been moved under the name of a corporate umbrella by now). Armand is far, far too sentimental to sell something that was so vitally important to him. I think he lies about it in his book for two reasons: 1. He was still wounded and lashing out at Daniel, and he knew saying he'd sold most of the island would hurt him, and 2. After QotD was published, a flood of tourists "looking" for Lestat came to the island (same as we VC fans go to New Orleans and "look" for them... we know they're not real, but...) and Armand did not like that one bit.

I also think the name was changed and it's probably open 24 hours now with a brand spanking new resort hotel circa 1999 or whatever, but it's still theirs and they still call it Night Island. And they still use the Villa regularly, and try to get Lestat and Marius to agree to host some Coven events there, too.

3. Obscure headcanon

I believe Daniel and Armand were together until 1993 or 1994, and were traveling around trying to reconnect and rekindle their relationship when they finally had the fight that split them up "for good" pre-MtD. Granted, I think for Armand it was Daniel leaving him "for good." I think for Daniel it was more "I need to take a break and clear my head, I'm going to take a time out." But they are terrible at communicating, especially when they're fighting, so... we all know how that went.

For a more fun--"fun"-- obscure headcanon, here is the worst thing I think Armand ever did in the name of weird science according to Daniel (tw: animal cruelty): he read about Edison electrocuting that poor elephant and got really interested in how that electrocution worked. So he got a fish bowl and experimented with fish. Then one night, Daniel finds the bathtub full of dead rats with a toaster in it, plugged into the wall. They definitely fought about it, and they definitely moved out of that apartment that night. It might one of the only times Armand truly skeeved him out, worse even than the rats in the microwave. He also didn't take baths for a good six months after.

Okay, sorry sorry, but that has been in my head for a while.

8. Unpopular opinion about them

I'm so bad at these because tbh I never know what "the popular" opinions are.

I guess I will say, I don't think Armand ever regretted turning Daniel and was, in fact, happy with how he turned out. We only get little glimpses into his thoughts on the matter in QotD, but he seems pretty enamored with Daniel as a vampire. For all his fears that Daniel might come to resent him for it, or no longer want/need him, he does seem pleased with the result. (Is this unpopular? I honestly do not know.)

I also don't think Daniel was a mess of a vampire or a bad fledgling. I think he experienced being a newbie vampire with an extreme intensity that made him quicker to laugh or more prone to staring at the patterns in the wallpaper, but I don't think that's particularly abnormal for a new vampire, either. I also think Daniel was especially elated to finally get the Blood - it meant not only would he not die a mortal death, but it was proof positive that Armand truly loved him as he always believed and wanted to spend eternity with him. He was riding a hell of a high, but I don't think he was mad, or out of his head, or a problem fledgling in any way.

I also firmly believe they had some solidly good years together in that time, and even though there were fights and arguments (and Armand's fears that he tried to manifest as self-fulfilling prophecy), they did actually have plenty of fun together until they split.

Again, I have no idea how "unpopular" any of that is.

Thank you again for the ask and happy new year!

#armand #daniel molloy #armand/daniel #devil's minion #vc headcanons #vc #answers in the desert #aberandlime #character ask meme #vampire chronicles

21 notes · View notes

chenyann · 2 years

Text

Cake Bake!!

All boys!!

Today there is a cake bake!, if you don't know what that means let me explain, all students will have to bake a cake in 2 and a half hours.The best cake wins a date with the lovely prefect of ramshackle!

cw: gn!reader, crack & fluff, not much of my normal but I digress, unedited,based off someone who never play the cooking event💀.

Riddle

It looks good

But it's not🥲

It has 3 cups of salt in it

Trey told him it make the sugar sweeter

Plain cake

Plain icing

Plain in general

Yako score:

2/10

Was 0/10

+2 points because the flower

Trey

Looks cute(ˊᗜˋ )

strawberries 😍😍😍😍

tastes just right ✅

He probably added real strawberries inside (´-﹏-`)

Could it be better?

Yes

yako score:

8/10

-2 points because of too much icing

Carter

Looks like red velvet

It's not

It actually paprika

Butter cream icing

It looks like fish food at the top🤢

It's not? I hope

He tried(„• ֊ •„)੭

Yako score:

2/10

-8 because of me thinking it was red velvet.

Ace

Let me be like Gordon Ramsay real quick

ITS FUCKING RAW!

Done(•v•)

not only is it ugly

But it's raw

Done eat it babe 😔😔

it's chocolate

Too much chocolate

He probably put salt in it on purpose

Yako score:

0/10

He is gonna kill us both prefect 😪

Deuce

Ummm(·•᷄‎ࡇ•᷅ )

He tried

It tastes ok....

I think

Was ment to be a marble cake

Failed

Too much egg in the icing

it's a plain cake

But with a little chocolate

So In taste wise

It's good

Yako score:

5/10

-5 cause it's ugly

Leona

ruggie made it

Told ruggie to write that

Plain

Atleast there is a heart

He gonna drag you to nap after the cake bake

Yako score:

1/10

-9 points because it's rude

Kept one because ruggie made it

Ruggie

Yum

It's plain

But it's from grandma bucchis cook book

😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋😋

I WOULD EAT IT LIKES ITS A **** I just said tart chill yall

4 layers!!!!!

Butter cream icing 😋

It's a bit original but there is bits of orange in it

That's what makes it a granny bucchi special!

Yako score:

10/10

It's a original, it has a twist,the buttercream makes it sweet but the orange makes it pop!

Jack

Oh?

This was unexpected 🤨

I like it

the sweetness of the berries makes the chocolate more flavourful

I would be better if icing was all around it but it's okay ig

he did his best(˶ᵔᴗᵔ˶)

the icing in the middle is lacking tbh

Yako score:

8/10

The aesthetic wasn't there

Azul

Guys

HEAR ME OUT

He can't bake

Poor boy wants that date tho

So who better to bake than the sea witch

He did Ursula dirty💀💀💀

It would taste good tho

It would taste like berries

Don't ask

But other than the...."lovely" art.

It's okay

Yako score:

6/10

-4 cause of the art

jade

Okay

It delightful

Very cute

may or maynot be real mushrooms...😅

Be careful

You dodon'want to be poisoned now do we(˶ᵔᴗᵔ˶)

butter cream flavored ^^

Yako Score:

9/10

I don't want him to poison me okay

floyd

...

Honestly I don't even know wtf this is

Don't eat

Someone put a caution sign on it

I'm so scared

DOES IT HAVE GRAVEY ON IT*@[++[[]*+

Oh no

God no

I think we are gonna die

I quit

It looks like my cats food

This makes me fr sick

Yako score:......

.......no

Kalim

Jamil done it

BUT!!!!

But. Kalim wrote a long and surprisingly good description of what he wanted made

Don't get me wrong tho, he wanted to make it

It's good

I don't like the nut tho..IM SORRY!😭😭

yako score:

7/10

-3 because of the nuts

Jamil

I didn't really try 🤓

He is lying

Wants to 1 up Kamil so bad

Probably sabotaged kalim💀💀💀

if you praise him istg prefect I will wack you

lives off fondant

Vanilla cake:0

It's really plain tbh

Yako score:

8/10

-2 because it's plain

And boring

Vil

Custom made(๑•̀ㅁ•́๑)

But very pretty 😍

Can I eat the butterflies?????

If not this is a scam

Half of it is organic icing

1/3 is cake

2/3 is icing and air

Don't ask

The design is kinda everywhere

But it somehow works

I think its the pink

Strawberry.

That it

MAYBE CHERRY??????

Yako score: 10/10 if I can eat the butterflies

If not then it's 7/10

Rook

Simple

Uhm

It's simple

It's cute

The colors look divine

positive message

I love it

Maybe a plain cake?

I would eat this

He would put a bit of salt too keep you on ur toes😌

Yako score:100/10

I love the vibes he is making

Epel

...

Don't get me wrong it would taste delightful

I just think he wouldn't know how to decorate it

So he did minions

Ummmmm

Rook offered to give tips but epel said no🙂🙂

Should have let him tbh

but i digress

Yalo score:

4/10

-6 for the minions

Idia

Let's be honest now

It's gonna be one of these

Yucky

No.

Yako score:

-100000000000000000000000/10

I'm being honest

Ortho

Sweet lil bby♡♡

he is a robot

There is no flaws

Unless he wants one

It is kinda plain

He would have done more

But it's still good

A lil bland

Because he won't eyeball the sugar🙄

But still good

Yako score:

7/10

-3 could be better

Malleus

Why yes that is a wedding cake

*hint hint wink wink*

He cheated and used magic

But you don't need to know

HE WILL DO ANYTHING TO WIN THST DATE WITH YOU PREFCET

he would say yall should cut it together

Smh

Down bad 😔

Plain

If it was me I would say no

Because it's plain

Sorry

Yako score:

3/10

-7 plain and cheated

Lilia

Run

And don't even think about eating it

You will get food poisoning

And it won't be pretty

If you wanna sit on the toilet for the next week then be my guest and eat it

Mayo acts as icing

.....the hotdog looks like a penis

Idk what that yellow stuff is😰😰

Yako score:

- ♾/10

We all know why

Silver

Made 3

His animal friend helped

Probably one of the best hand decorator and baker here

He did nice

It's cute

It's fun

Aesthetic was on point

The flavors would clash

the flowers add taste

Yako score:

10/10

This one is going places

Sebek

Nobody said that

It's okay

Everyone loves you

Sebek is just mad

he will get over it

Plain

I like the rainbow tho

Yako score:

2/10

I Liked the rainbow(〃⌒⤙⌒)ゞ

That all folks!!

Who do you think should win?

298 notes · View notes

nokingsonlyfooles · 1 month

Text

Wanna Hear a Joke?

A Maoist tries to explain Food Not Bombs to an anarchist.

That's it. That's the joke. If you were an anarchist, you'd get it.

I don't think they intended to explain it to me and the spouse, but they put up a flyer with a scannable code and we almost went to their event this weekend. Red and Well Read sounds like a group we could vibe with! But, uh, no. Not just no but HELL no. In fact, halfway through the article, I decided if I did go, I'd go with a protest sign. A very simple one with large print:

HUNGRY PEOPLE AIN'T LISTEN.

But that may be a bit reductive, and doesn't address the authoritarian need for cannon fodder that's all over this hot take. I don't want to roll up and try to get some authoritarians to listen to me, especially when they make it this clear they see me as a problem that needs solving. But I can typing! And the internet void beckons me to leave no thought unexpressed!

Food Not Bombs will tell you, in broad strokes, what they are about:

To combat poverty and homelessness

To facilitate community gatherings of hungry people

To allow anyone to volunteer to help cook, and then eat.

It's broad strokes because anarchists. If it's not working for us, we don't say "do it anyway," we hash out something that works for us. And, oh, boy, do tankies HATE that. They want to strongarm their way to a Revolution - somehow, they believe that will go well - and anything that gets in the way is a problem. You can't just feed people! That decreases their motivation and makes them dependent! (And conservatives agree with that! Which should be ringing alarm bells, but it never does.)

The point is that you CAN just feed people. You totally can. It's good for them, it's good for all of us, and if you're willing to push back against the status quo (and maybe go to jail or end up on the receiving end of some police brutality) you can do it.

If there is anything in that for "the Revolution" it's the simple fact that hungry people do not make good decisions, and anarchists (ancaps are not anarchists, please, I don't want to have that discussion!) want to help people make good decisions, because everyone has a right to self-determination - but if you're in a really bad place, you will not exercise that right responsibly.

And we don't know how to deal with that! (To be fair, we don't know how to deal with anything; we have ideas but we need YOUR input.) We'd rather just help get you to a better place and keep our fingers crossed for less toxicity. If you're not able to participate in the process of bettering the world, we need to make some adjustments so you can. A very simple thing to do is ask, "Are you hungry?" and go, "OK, let's eat!" And if, after they've eaten, they might not want to do your Revolution, WTF even is your Revolution? You need to starve people into cooperation? If you're willing to do that before you upend society, won't you be willing to do it afterwards? History says: YES!

History also says starving people are willing to throw in their lot with an authoritarian shitstain who promises to feed them eventually. Willing to kill for them, to die for them, to help them win elections. And this person will not necessarily have to deliver on the food if they don't want to. Deep down, that's what anyone arguing for this kind of "Revolution" wants. As if the only thing wrong with the status quo is who's in charge. All we need is one of those GOOD dictators. That definitely ain't it.

I really feel like I shouldn't have to explain this, but: the main goal of feeding people is to feed people. Are they eating? OK, then that's a win. If they get a little more radical by association, that's fine, they can come back and help cook, or come up with something else to do. But the food is not contingent upon the radicalization! We're not trying to train them like dogs! They are people! They need a little help and they'll probably get back on their feet if society stops kicking them in the groin. A human being needs no Master, and if they want one (outside of kinky playspaces!) something has gone wrong. They have a need that's not being met and they're trying to meet it in a bad way. So maybe we can help them meet it in a better way!

For all the above blog post insists that we must get out there and talk to people, it doesn't provide much space for listening. Y'all wanna get out there and talk AT the chronically unseen and unheard some more? "Hi! Would you let me dictate your needs today?" Maybe they will. Hungry people don't make good decisions. But they won't listen either. And you may find that most of them aren't willing to die for you like you want. Sometimes they are, but often they are not.

Can't we just help each other? One-to-one without anyone having to be the Boss of Help? A take-a-penny/leave-a-penny situation? If we can - safely, without the people in power trying to kill us for it - that's all the Revolution I need. And it's hard enough trying to get that.

Because authoritarians of any political stripe are scared to death of it, and they will try to stop us.

But we're not going away. And it's hard to sell us this bullshit - maybe a couple of us will buy, but not all of us. We don't march in lockstep. Anarchists will resist. And if that's not effective... Why does it bother you so damn much?

#long post #anarchy #anarchism #anarchist #socialism #authoritarianism #anti authoritarian #authoritarians in lil mao hats are still authoritarians!#just slightly cuter #not cute enough for me to hang out with them but enough to fool me briefly with their lil posters #and this is why we can't have nice friends!

8 notes · View notes

hozukitofu · 2 years

Text

no better comedy than the immoral villainous seemingly irredeemable cousin going from 'no one will love me i am a monster inside' to domestically raising kids with his sort-of-enemy maybe former-tortured-prisoner and the whole time he's STRICKEN with wtf is even happening are we in love? are we married? is this a ride to die?? can't even call this a speedrun bc the speed at which events had happened is so jarring it tore the fabric holding fragile realities together.

did they date? unsure, uncertain, no one is going to ASK they like their heads where those are thanks. does anyone know what's happening? not even these guys know and they're coparenting while yearning at pathetic ASTRONOMICAL levels. something something repressed guilt pride severe doubt and insecurity inferiority complexes. also one day you're torturing this guy and the next week he's taking your brother to school and folding your collective household laundry, there is not a set of vocabulary that can express how fast everything had been going and you're thinking 'this is why people stay in marriages bc the fall out is terrible, the paperwork the bureaucracy the courts the law the custody battles. not saying this will be me bc i chose to be shackled as love's slave but objectively this is some truly scary shit' and you're saying this as someone who ripped out tongues the other night

meanwhile the other guy is just too smug about it all. it is also possible that he may have orchestrated events so it seems all coincidental. sometimes a man gets tired of being gunned down at the ripe old age of 20-something and says fuck it i'll raise a teenager and a disgraced former heir of a criminal empire it'll be like my old job less blood more laundry. nobody checks in with him this much when he was doing a good job bodyguarding so now he thrives in bickering with his former captor in an ikea-renovated kitchen in the suburbs about how much spice is tolerable in a dish (mediocre cooking) while said captor is fretting over him in barely-repressed yearning and pathetic adoration. pete is too asian and polite to bring it up but sometimes he's like yeah this dude truly was swinging above his weight when he landed me. 'im the sucker that was baited by his pretty face. now i trap him in marriage and love. it's fair enough'

unstoppable force (one man's cringe and deep asian shame) vs immovable object (another man's equally asian grudge and paying even)

eventually vegas confronts pete about baby trapping him (the baby is macau) and pete saying no YOU DID that is YOUR baby YOU trapped ME so they keep this up for a while until macau interrupts like I TRAPPED BOTH OF YOU CAN YOU PLEASE GO MAKE OUT AND BE NORMAL.

IKEA renovated kitchen was inspired by this entire FIC please love and shower the author with flowers and rice. it finishes today i got the email notif and ducked out from work to read it in a corner i have normal feelings about god's creation

#kinnporsche cringe #vegaspete #vegas theerapanyakul #pete saengtham #kinnporsche #kinnporsche comedy #post series thoughts #macau pays the heavy price of living in this cringecom everyday #but it pays off when he gets to complain about it to tankhun #the real plot of season 2 is macau running away from vp to khun #P'KHUN GUESS WHAT HAPPENED #we love repressed mafia men who can't discuss their feelings #yes there were multiple confessions but will those be enough??? never #cringe and shame and doubt (vegas) vs appearing clueless and MARRIAGE TRAPPING (pete)#kinn himself couldn't think of a more deserving fate to vegas #porsche be like 'pete told me vegas is going to temple all the time'#kinn: he needs to pray for forgiveness for all those games he played bc rn games are playing him #the crux of this comedy is pete weaponising the asian shame against vegas ruthlessly #and vegas maybe letting him get away with it #then they fall in love bc they're both manipulative assholes who deserve each other #manipulative pete my beloved #pathetic vegas my blorbo #suffering macau bc hes a rich teenage boy he needs some character building

190 notes · View notes

nonbinarylocalcryptid · 3 months

Text

MAG10 - Vampire Killer

*turns around in the most ugliest coolest yellowest office chair like a Bond villain, petting a baguette-shaped cushion* so, you came here from MAG9 without expecting the whiplash. Don't worry, you are not alone lmao

Trevor Herbert is like a homeless Chuck Norris, a shaggy Terminator, a Van Helsing lite (the Hugh Jackman one, not the original). He looks in your head like the dog in The Lady and The Tramp but in human version.

And the very first thing this mf says when he writes his statement is "I've been procrastinating this shit for 50 years, but hey, I finally came to the Magnus Institute". So better late than never and all that jazz.

Quoooooooting timeeeee:

"I hear someone even made me a page on the Internet and it got a few thousand likes. I don’t know exactly what that means but it sounds nice." - Trevor Herbert, July 10th 2010

Aww, doesn't he sound nice? :D

"Obviously that’s not why I’m here, though, is it? No, I’m here because I have also dedicated my life to finding and killing vampires." - Also f*cking Trevor

Sorry u wHAT

" (...) but I do not have proof to give you except for the vampire teeth that I will leave with this statement." - Trevor "I brought you a souvenir" Herbert

" I killed my first vampire in 1959." - Trevor Herbert, THE LEGEND THE MAN THE MYTH

You wish you sound as badass xD

"I was hit by a stale, coppery smell that I did not recognise as old blood at the time, since I was barely 16 and did not have then the experience I have now." - Trevor, barely 16 but already a poet

I find upsetting how many statement givers were so young they didn't know they were smelling blood.

"The furniture and wallpaper had clearly not been changed in many decades, and a thick layer of dust covered everything." - Trevor, 16, also an offended interior designer

LOL the landlord when he tells you " I just painted everything, it's all new"

"I remember wondering whether Sylvia McDonald walked exactly the same route through the house always, as I saw other clear lines of passage in the rooms we passed through." - Trevor "WTF" Herbert

" It was 1968, I remember because that was the year United won the European Cup, (...)" - Trevor "Yes, I'm British, why u asking?" Herbert

"I do not know if you’ve ever felt your blood being sucked out of you, but I would not recommend it." - By Trevor, 0/5, no stars

"Regardless, there is substantial evidence to support the version of events told by Mr. Herbert in all aspects except the vampirism." - Jon Sims, April 13th 2016

He really said "I believe everything except the vampire bullshit" XD

"(...) It may be that they take Mr. Herbert’s statement far more seriously than I do." - Also Jon

He sees that a lot of government and law people takes this statement seriously and goes "hm how weird, why tho, it's all bullshit"

Small review:

The vampires in the tma universe are so freaking weird, disturbing of course, personally I can't really tell if they are scary tho, but I'm certain they are a mystery.

Gotta say, RIP Nigel, he seemed nice :(

I must admit Trevor is quite an interesting figure, he's intelligent and resourceful, can do much with almost nothing and put together every piece of information he has in a way he can reach a satisfactory conclusion. And then he just sticks with it. There are these monsters, which I know how to kill, and so I do it. Simple. Efficient. Practical as hell.

This is also the second time going clubbing has ended horribly for someone in tma, and honestly? Wtf

This guy just die in the break room, like, lmao. He really said "no time like the present, may as well reach supersaiyan state in that couch over ther", and he fucking did it

And then Jon ends everything by showing a lot of evidences while acting the sceptic part and it's so goddamn funny. He should be a comedian.

General overview:

Vibe: this one is so fucking wild, nice homeless grandpa ends up being the modern Van Helsing and "dies" in a couch at paranormal research institute. Iconic

Horror: there are cryptids in it, that's horror genre coded

Audio: pretty ASMR in general

Humour: hilarious Terminator Grandpa, feat.Jon being Jon

Score: 10/10

#tma shitpost #tma #jon sims #jon sims being jon sims #trevor herbert #tma review #mag 10

9 notes · View notes

tangsakura · 1 year

Note

For when you got time: do you have any theories or something you would really like to see happening in the next chapters?

Contains content from arc after Hunter x Hunter - up to the latest chapters. Please DNI if you don't want to be spoiled.

Machi's backstory with Hisoka. Really need to know wtf is going on between them that it all lead to what it did in ch 357. They have this relationship that I can't just pinpoint no matter what........

Speaking of which, Machi needs to go up the tier. My girl is still in Tier 5 ;--;

Tserriednich has something to do with Sarasa's death indirectly. Some people also speculated it when Chrollo mentioned about the film set where Sarasa died and 'showing off their artwork' or something along those lines. When I first read it, I thought about the Heily family. Heily was sponsored by Tserriednich until Morena happened lmao. Plus one of the guys who were abductors look like the tattoo artists at Tserriednich's suite.

Hisoka will be the reason why Kurapika will find out that the Troupe is in the Black Whale. This self-explanatory.

I want to see Hisoka see all the Princes and their beasts. You know what I'm interested about? His reaction when he sees Tserriednich, Camille, Halkenburg and Benjamin

I have a feeling Hisoka will sneak into the royal banquet lmao. I can feel it in my bones ahahahhaha

The hidden Nen user in Kurapika's Nen crash course class. Is he a mole from Morena in Tier 1 but couldn't get any closer to Tserriednich that's why Morena wants to lure one or more of his private guards? I wanna know who the person is in the next batch of HxH chapters.

As for the silent majority person, I thought it's the bob-haired girl that Hinrigh first chased in Tier 3 in 390 - perhaps she has powers that don't need her to be actually in Tier 1. Also with revelations in ch 399, Morena is most likely also aware of Kurapika as he is involved in the underworld for awhile now and he is a Prince's guard - probably realized why he is there in the boat in the first place. Idk maybe Morena is testing his patience or something and is considering her as one of her chess pieces. (One of crackhead theories as you can see)

Tserriednich meeting Melody. This gonna traumatized Melody as she'll hear his heartbeat and realized how evil he is. And Tserriednich obsession of art from promising ladies or some sht is making me super scared for Melody. I hope she survives and lives.

Hisoka and Chrollo rematch when they touch down at the fake continent. Fake continent probably has hot weather by then and thus it will fulfill the end of Hisoka's real prophecy from Yorknew

Illumi and Hisoka are working together where Illumi and Kalluto will escape or attempts to, then Hisoka double crosses them or almost does it (crackhead theory)

Shizuku's death. Easiest to target by Hisoka. But if Hisoka won't or can't kill her then it'll be either due to Tserriednich or Morena directly or indirectly

Tserriednich, Halkenburg, Camille and Benjamin's next move. I'm craving for Tier 1 events lmao xD

Hinrigh having second thoughts about double crossing or playing further with the Troupe

More Hinrigh content lmao he grew on me during this comeback omfg now I don't want him to die ;---;

And that's it for now lmao my brain is fried so ima yeet out rn

57 notes · View notes

asrieltheflower · 11 months

Text

Murder drones rant with spoilers:

Wtf is up Cyn?

Like, it's not fully clear to me. They depict her to be your classic "heartless robot who mimics being normal to disguise evil plans"

But like, is she real? I've seen people suggest that absolute solver (a name the monster gave itself I might add) is the base ai of all worker drones, and the wd_program is what filters that ai into being these workers. This makes sense since the VHS tape says that one of the errors that cause zombie drones is that their wd_program or core is not connected when the drone reboots. But if that's the case then how is it that the several workers who have had plenty of casualties and don't know how to dispose of the bodies, never saw a single zombie? More so, we never saw J actually turn into one, despite dying. Instead we saw a specific organ that clearly was made by Cyn pop out and start rebuilding itself using nearby technology with the intent of fixing J. Later we see a fully rebuilt J, so clearly the personality was still intact, so why would Solver be active?

I think absolute solver isn't an AI, I think it's all Cyn. "Solver" presents itself as some sort of cosmic horror, an existence beyond comprehension that controls the drones at the core. But also it's too stupid to realize that V needs glasses to see... It's so scary with its huge form appearing from all sides without a real face... And it gets hacked by Uzi? It feels pain when N stabs it? It gets frustrated that it can't hold a knife and needs help? This is weirdly humane behaviour... Hold on a second, what if it's just a trick?

Cyn gave us the name absolute solver because she's got a god complex or something? She WANTS to be all powerful, and if you were locked in a basement for being useless, in a situation where you are powerless to do anything about it, that would make sense.

I remember hearing that in the matrix, the robots look the way they do because they hated humans and transformed themselves to look otherworldly, which I'm pretty sure is itself a reference to the biblical stories of a certain angel mutilating it's form to spite the creations of god... A certain... anti-christ? In this world of super-natural and mythical creatures crossed with SciFi I think Cyn is our Lucifer. Someone hateful to her "gods" (the humans that created her and gave her purpose). So she seeks to overthrow them. That explains why Tessa was spared, Cyn might actually care about Tessa, which explains why Cyn is also using the Drones, instead of just wiping their ai. She's a self appointed god here to help achieve the singularity (some sort of technical advancement, probably something that makes Cyn's weird god powers function without the heavy cost of needing constant oil).

It would also explain doll and Uzi. They are tapping into the same power Cyn has. But they aren't going crazy with a desire to control the world or achieve the singularity. They are still worried about their own lives, and fitting in or getting revenge or whatnot. They are still themselves. What is worth talking about is that we don't see how doll survives Vee when her parents die, and we definitely saw Uzi get stabbed through the chest when her dad left. And yet, we only see them engage in the absolute solver after the fact of both of these events. Clearly they are both zombie drones, I think the Wd_programs only purpose is to keep them satisfied with working. That's why everyone was just happy waiting behind the doors with no aspiration to leave, or even have a defense force, they have a program to keep them in line.

Who knows, maybe it's a coincidence and I'm seeing something that isn't really here, maybe the weird bracelet things are what allow solver to be used without the robots being taken over?

Regardless, I'm a bit curious of Thad, since he's one of the only people who was up for fighting back against the murder drones back in episode 1, even if it was brief he was definitely an odd one out there, being the only person who believed the WDF could help fight back. Maybe he has some plot relevance beyond ship baiting, cause god knows this show loves playing with its tropes. And the guy walked out of a fight with Solver... Like they just watched him leave? Could be just one big joke but it'd be cool

#murder drones #spoilers #rant #what does wd_program actually do?#is it rules to follow?#is it their personality?

22 notes · View notes

maegalkarven · 6 months

Text

An interlude. What now?

Happens between Empty Prayers and Dreams of Red.

Nemo tries to be serious and Think of the Future. It backfires.

Characters: Dark Urge (Nemo), Enver Gortash, Astarion, Karlach, Wyll, Shadowheart, Gale, Lae'zel.

TW: mentions of cannibalism, questionable way to raise children (Nemo wtf), canon-typical Durge behavior.

Info about Nemo's assassins:

https://www.tumblr.com/maegalkarven/732101148639707136/so-i-actually-created-most-of-the-notable?source=share

"You do realize we all are doomed, right?" The question comes out of nowhere amidst of one of the calmest nights they have. It breaks the feeble illusion of peace right away.

"Now, you don't have to put it like that," Gale tries. "We still have some choices-"

"Blowing yourself up is not a choice," Wyll cuts out, uncharacteristically sour.

"But-"

"No, Gale," Shadowheart agrees. "No more stupid self-sacrifices for the gods who do not deserve that. Besides, you remember what Gortash said? What if you have done as Mystra wanted you to and detonated the orb in the illithid colony, it would turn every parasite-infested person into mindflayer?"

"I'm not sure how much we can trust a word of the former Chosen of Bane."

"Fair," the former Chosen of Shar agrees. "I wouldn't trust him either. But something tells me this time he was telling the truth."

"He also sits just across you, if your memory is that fragile," Gortash comments. "And thank you, not like I was thinking of impending doom and our deaths for every hour of every day now."

"Not like you kickstarted this whole event," Karlach comments.

"And what would you have me to do, let Orin kill Nemo?"

"Well, you could have not tried to conquer the world using the extremely dangerous magical artifact and, you know, the Elder Brain."

"You keep saying that, but I have yet to hear a single idea how to fix it and for us, you know, not die drastically and like fools."

"Everyone always dies like a fool," Astarion comments. "Death is dumb like that."

"If you'd only let me finish," Nemo raises his voice. "And stopped this 'woe are us, we are doomed' crying-"

"We are listening," Wyll tries. "Oh, well, at least I am trying to."

Nemo sends him a grateful look.

"Alright, let's start it anew, you literal bickering children-"

"Hey-"

"Gortash started it-"

"Oh, fuck off-"

"Quiet," and surprisingly, they all quiet down. This is who Nemo is forced to work with these days. Unbelievable.

"We are screwed. This is not me being overly dramatic, this is not me being pessimistic, this is the actual truth we're dealing with. The Elder brain has one stone and if it wasn't breaking out of the hold before - which he was, very much - it's clearly out of it now. Now, the questions why it hasn't turned everyone into mindflayers and why it's playing laying low for now is a mystery, but-“

"It's luring us back to it," Astarion comments. "What? Can't we offer our thoughts too? I didn't know it's One Man show you're having here."

"You have no idea how many people have been stabbed over interrupting him mid speech," Gortash comments. "Me included."

"Oh yeah, well, maybe try to not talk over me, asho-"

"I wasn't talking over you-"

"Just like you aren't doing it now?" Nemo glares at him. "You're lucky I need you alive."

"Thank you oh so kindly, the gracious one-"

"Tsk'va," Lae'zel interrupts the quarrel. "You two desire to tear into each other’s flesh so much it makes you stupid. Go get the urges out of the system and come back when you're capable of being rational."

This comment, made with intention of calming things down, has rather the opposite effect.

"You're the one to talk," Nemo hisses as his face reddens.

"I do not ‘desire to tear into his flesh’," Gortash argues.

Astarion laughs.

"Yes, and I am not a vampire spawn."

"Can we not fight?" Wyll, an unfortunate voice of reason amidst this chaos.

"Oh, I don't know," Gale smirks. "I rather find it amusing to watch."

"You know what?" Nemo snaps. "Go on, detonate this orb. I'm done with it."

"Now I'm not going to, purposely because you asked me so nicely."

"I fucking hate this family."

"Karlach, you already said that."

"It doesn't mean I hate it any less."

"I miss my children," Nemo suddenly chimes in. "They listened to me."

"Your who?"

"Oh, please," Gortash snorts. "I once saw one of your children stab her brother over something minor."

"It was their brother and it was nothing minor. He took their target, that's just rude."

"I'm sorry," Gale tries. "Can we backtrack now? What children are you talking about now?"

Nemo blinks at them.

"Oh," he exclaims. "My assassins, of course, the ones I personally brought into the fold."

"And the reason you address them as children is because..?"

"They were orphans Nemo picked up from the streets," Gortash mentions. "At least that's what I was told."

"Excuse me, what?" Karlach, indignation flaring with her fire. "You stole children?"

"First of all, it's kidnapped and not stole. Second of all, they came willingly," Nemo scoffs. "And really, do you think they had any other choice? Do you think any good life was waiting for them? I saved their lives."

"You've abducted children into the cult and made them killers," Wyll speaks. "Nemo, this is-"

"Wrong?" He interrupts. "How wrong can it truly be? They would die without me, or better yet, get killed. Do you think there's mercy for a girl who took a life of her stepfather? Whose mother blamed her for the murder even if said stepfather was in dire need of killing?" He pierces Wyll with a sharp stare.

"Do you think Flaming Fists would save a little tiefling boy with too much magic in his blood? Do you think they'd get to the mad crowd in time and protect the boy from it? Do you think they'd even care? A tiefling child, an evil child, a hellspawn. No one would miss him, no one would cry for him. And," he smiles and this smile looks poisonous.

"Do you think your honorable father would spare a child whose survival was linked to the deal with the fiend? Do you think he, who exiled his own son, would look at destruction of the House Et'rris, at the only surviving its member, linked to a devil, and help them? Save them?" His voice drops to a low tone.

"How dare you judge me? You were not there to save these children, I was. What did I do but gave them a second chance? What did I do but gave them home? Where else would they go? Who else would feed starving orphans on the streets, Duke Ravengard?" He laughs an ugly, bitter laugh.

"The Council of Four? Don't be ridiculous, they never even looked down to see the low folk struggling. Those children, all those children would die if not for me. From the so-called justice, from an angry mob, from prison, from starvation. I found them, fed them, cared for them. I made them best of the best, the perfect murderers, the perfect shadows of the night. And who can hurt them now, when they're the worst things haunting Baldur's Gate? Who would dare to strike at them but their own? I made them strong."

The stunned, eerie silence falls over the camp.

Then Karlach raises her voice.

"What did you feed them with?"

"This is irrelevant."

"No, it's not."

"It was a good meat: not rotten, not touched by any diseases, I even cooked it-"

"I fed children the human flesh?!" Gale asks in horror.

"Of course you'd assume it was human," Nemo scoffs. "It was elven too, you know. Some dwarf meat, even halfling or tiefling there and there-"

"You did what?!"

"It was that or starving on the streets! And anyway, I was fed humanoid flesh my entire life and I turned out alright-"

Astarion scoots a little closer to Gortash.

"He did not turn out alright," the pale elf whispers, watching the argument rising to new, dangerous heights. "And you knew that, didn't you?"

"What Nemo eats flesh?" Gortash hums. "It wasn't a big secret."

"And what he feeds his...children the same?"

"It's a Cult of Murder," the man shrugs. "One expects some level of atrocities from it."

"That's not the answer."

"That's the one you'll get," Astarion watches Gortash watching Nemo, a small satisfies smile dancing on his lips. "I don't particularly care what he feeds his assassins, only what all of them seem to care very little for table manners."

"So I'm guessing you've met them?"

"Yes."

"...What are they like?"

"Why don't you ask their benefactor that and not the man who saw them once or twice?"

"Because their benefactor is currently in a screaming match with our companions," Astarion's shrugs. "Though he seems to be holding his ground just alright."

Gortash snorts.

"He used to lead fifty or so bloodthirsty murderers and made it look easy," another long, heavy look at Nemo. "He is good at handling people. Bhaal convinced Nemo the best thing a bhaalshapwn can be is a perfect blade, which is a shame, really. Nemo would do wonders in high court; he has enough charisma and intelligence to wrap the nobles around his fingers without them so much as noticing it.”

"It sounds like you admire him," Astarion comments, trying very hard not to feel slighted at that. Of course tyrant admires his nearest in dearest, it was to be expected. And anyway, doesn’t Nemo deserve to be admired?

But why does it sit so ill against his skin?

"Of course I admire him," the tyrant replies, not even looking away from the assassin. "He is brilliant. His part in our plans is not to be overlooked; everything came falling apart the moment Orin replaced him. Bhaal might have been content with a mad woman who could not control her urges, but our plan could not. She made a mess of things, ruined several of carefully constructed plans and hadn't even noticed. The amount of people I had to tadpole simply because Orin was acting unwise is-" he sighs. "Where Nemo would just waltz into the room, smile and bullshit his way through everything, Orin made things worse."

Astarion hums.

"I once saw Nemo convince an orthon to kill his minions, then his pet, then himself," he mentions. "So I can easily see him doing that."

"An orthon?" Gortash looks surprised. "Where in the Nine Hells did you find an orthon?"

"In a Gauntlet of Shar," Astarion shrugs. "He made an ill-fitted deal with Raphael and tried to get out of it. Nemo tricked him into false getaway."

Three's a long silence after that.

"Raphael," Gortash speaks slowly, as if tasting the words. "It's been a while since I've heard that name. How did you stumble into him?"

"More like he stumbled into us. He appeared from the thin air, laid heavy on those sweet talks of his and tried to talk Nemo into a deal. Probably still trying, all things considered. I am not sure what exactly he wants from Nemo, but he is insistent."

Gortash grows silent once more.

"I would advise against strikingly any deals with that particular devil," he comments after a pause. "Deals with him are even fouler than the deal with the devil would be expected to be. Raphael is clever; he is patient and knows how to play the game. Worst of all, he is at advantage of knowing Nemo while Nemo does not know him, and in the position where he is holding a grudge against the dear assassin of mine."

Astarion bites down the bitter taste of the way Gortash claims Nemo as his.

This can wait. His questions would not.

"Why would he hold a grudge against Nemo?"

Gortash actually laughs, a short lived and curt sound, but laugh none less.

"Because Nemo has done something Raphael failed to do. Raphael has been lusting after the Crown of Karsus for millennia, but was never able to relieve it from Mephistopheles' vault. Together Nemo and I successfully orchestrated and executed the plan what brought the crown into our hands."

So this is what Raphael wants.

"He is after the crown," Astarion comment. "And he thinks Nemo will be able to get it for him."

Gortash nods.

"And I can't express enough how this is absolutely a thing what cannot happen. Raphael is bad enough without a otherworldly power what is the Crown of Karsus in his claws."

"So," Astarion studies the man closely. "Better the crown in your hands then?"

Gortash smiles.

"Providing what we can get it off Elder Brain first and live," he comments. "But yes."

#empty prayers au #dark urge: nemo #bg3 #dark urge x gortash #gortash x durge #lae'zel really said: you want to fuck each other so bad it makes you look stupid #it is like 1 line she has bc I have hard time writing her but isn't she valid for it #nemo is petty bitch but also OKAY-ish stepparent of turned out OKAY-ish 8 children. don't judge him he did his best #what's a lil cannibalism in the family #nemo saying: 'i was fed flesh and turned out alright' the same way ppl say 'i was beat up and turned out alright' like sweetheart. baby #you didn't turn alright #you're so not alright it's tragic #girl who killed stepdad is clotilda #the tiefling boy is vivias #he's also the brother some assassin stabs #i wrote 'brother' and then realized vivias is the only boy nemo adopted so #sorry bby #the assassin stabbing him over a kill is writt #they're a bitch and I love them so much #gortash not mentioning a thing about maybe knowing raphael...dude I see what you're doing #also everyone desires the crown of Karsus...EVERYONE #Gortash's new goal is to get crown of Karsus for himself now ESP after he found out Raphael is trying to talk Nemo into giving it away #shadowheart who probably ate humanoid flesh several times in the course of her life bc it's shar's thing too: *is suspiciously quiet*#astarion: nemo talked an othon into killing all his allies and then himself #gortash: nice!

12 notes · View notes