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bywons · 1 month

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𖧷 HEARTSHAKER — LHS

⌕ lee heeseung doesn't know what he wants from his rival, better marks or a kiss

pairing. student!lee heeseung x student!fem! reader wc. 1.4k tw/cw. jealousy, kissing genre. academic rivals to lovers, fluff, highschool au sru's note. requested for my nini love ♡ shitty title ik but i hope ya'll like cuz i dont T0T ( CATALOGUE?! )

¤ feedbacks and reblogs are always appreciated! PLS REBLOG ♡

96 out of 100.

thanks to the almighty above that lee heeseung is tired, the basketball jersey stuck to his back, sweat covering his face and colouring the red fabric darker as he pants for his breath, or else the test paper in his hands would have been crumpled and ripped to shreds.

not because of his number obviously.

“99, i knew i rocked this paper!”, a dulcet, familiar voice floats up to heeseung's ear from behind him, followed by a mean eye roll from him and his stance still. heeseung doesn't bother to turn around, not when he recognizes the infuriating feminine voice and already visualises the usual dark brown braids hanging by the either sides of her face, school tie too tight and almost reaching the last button of the shirt.

“why the long face?”, jake's interruption breaks heeseung out of his trance, as he takes the much unwanted seat beside him, “96 not enough for ‘ya?”

“oh shut up”, heeseung returns jake’s scoff slamming down his physics answer sheet against the wooden table. both heeseung and jake know it's not enough, whether it's a 96 or a 99 ’cause,

“it's never enough unless i cross y/n’s marks”, heeseung sighs, the answer sheet dampening under the pressure of his sweaty hands, as his forehead became the victim of the other.

everyone in the class is aware of the cutthroat competition and abhorrence between the two brunettes, already expecting the usual bickering episode between the two whenever it was time for exam results, and even if by chance someone got the same results as any one of them, they'd do their best and not bother the two.

but today is different, today heeseung doesn't find his usual energy to bicker with the braided girl sitting at the back of the class, not when she managed to beat him thrice in a row at his own game!

“last time it was a marks’ difference and now three? how is this even possible?”, heeseung groans while flipping the sheets over and over as if something magical would happen and increase his numbers.

“i heard park sunghoon's been studying chemistry with her,” jake sighs, pushing his fingers through his dark hair as he turns his head to the side, but his eyes steal a glance at heeseung, and he smirks, “‘ya know, the chemistry toppe—”

“yeah yeah i got you jake, i know who he is”, heeseung presses the bridge of his nose a bit too hard, the familiar face of the boy floating up to his vision, though he can't remember where his loved moles are on him. oh how all the girls are head over heels for park sunghoon.

is y/n one of them too? he could swear they're hanging out too much.

stupid thought, stupid stupid thought. heeseung winces at his sudden curiosity, why is giving this matter so much thought? he doesn't like y/n anyway, he doesn't like her bickering, he doesn't like her annoying attitude, he doesn't like her hair, he doesn't like her scent and he definitely doesn't like her smile. so lee heeseung shouldn't really get his head messed up in this.

the school bell rings, bringing out new tedious groans and sighs from the students as they dawdle to their next classes.

“i think she's coming here—”

“don't you have a physics class to be at, jake?”

“yeah yeah shoo me away all you want to”, jake scoffs, a smirk playing at his lips when he slings a bag on his shoulder before leaving the class, “bet you can't shoo away her.”

and before heeseung even knew it the class was empty, except him and as empty, dispersed out in the crowded hallways to their next classes. that is unless the previous dulcet but annoying voice came closer to heeseung.

“heeseung!”, you chirp, approaching him from behind, “how was your paper?”

“ugh what do you—”, heeseung's anger dies down when he turns around to face you, your hair's not done into braids today, instead it's let open with your tie loose this time, a few drops of sweat sticking to your forehead, dance practice maybe? “—w-want?”

“your marks of course,” you giggle at his stutter, taking a seat beside him, “wanna make sure if i beat you or nah.”

“yeah you did, but not on your own huh?”, heeseung scoffs, looking down at you. he realises his heart skips a beat when you tilt your head to the side, holding eye contact.

not good.

“huh? what do you mean heeseung?”, you pout, acting ever so confused by his accusation, “not on my own?”

“oh come on, the whole class knows it now”, heeseung rolls his eyes, “park sunghoon, rings any bell?”

“oh hoon?”, you grin, covering your mouth and suppressing a small giggle, “he did help me a lot with chemistry, he's so sweet!”

heeseung doesn't realise his face is getting hotter and redder by the minute, both by your presence and the pronunciation of somebody else's name. he has a nickname already? hoon? no way, you have only ever interacted with him, whether it was bickering or asking for notes or silently sitting beside each other. so how did this other guy pop up?

“hoon,” heeseung mumbles his nickname, his eyes searching for something in yours and he doesn't even notice he's sounding jealous, “how are you guys so close already…”

“well he's been tutoring me chemistry for a month now—”

“a month?!”, heeseung's brows lift up and his jaw hangs open.

heeseung doesn't know if he likes your new look, the way the curls of your hair rests on your shoulders, the way your tie is loose from your neck and the way your head tilts to look at his, heeseung's heart skips a beat and it knows something is wrong.

“why? is something—” your lips fall apart, a soft blush takes place on your cheeks and you giggle again, in a teasing tone you nudge heeseung's arm, “aww are you jealous?”

“what? don't be ridiculous now.”

“heeseung is jealous, you are jealous, you are jealous j-e-a-l-o-u-s”, you continue this song, nudging heeseung and teasing him more and more, causing his cheeks to heat up, eyes turning back to the open window and then back to yours.

“shut up y/n, you're not funny”, he scowls, the soft breeze enters the empty classrooms and hits the both of you like a refreshing wave.

and in that moment, through your teasing manner, the empty classroom, the echoes of your laughter and the soft breeze caressing your hair, your long dark hair that matched his and the way his heart skipped a beat, the way his heart always skipped a beat while you were around, he realises it's something good.

“if you shut up now i swear y/n”, heeseung tried and kept his best ‘angry at you’ acting.

“oh really? then why don't you make me?”, a soft chuckle leaves your lips and you squint your eyes.

it happens all so fast, heeseungs soft lips on yours, falling right into place. it tickles you a bit like feathers and pulls you in, until you realise that's his hand snaking around your waist. the kiss was delicate, caring and brought so much warmth from a person you only argued with.

you gasp for air, first one to pull back.

you meet his eyes, scurrying through yours and cheeks all red, probably embarrassed of what he did. the kiss quickly coloured your cheeks, a shy smile playing around your lips and a small glint in your eyes.

“i-i don't know what i did—”

“its okay heeseung”, you shush a nervous heeseung, the proximity increasing the pace of your hearts, “do you like me?”

“i love you”, heeseung answers almost instantly, “i love everything about you.”

“me too”, heeseung is the most relieved as he hears this, that hoon guy got nothing on him now. he's the winner.

“so, are we gonna date then?”, he chuckles.

you nod, “let's surprise the class together!”

lee heeseung doesn't know what he wanted when he got his answer sheets. better marks than y/n, a bickering episode with her, or maybe her to fall in love with her? he doesn't know.

a smirk falls upon his lips and he pulls you closer by your waist. he looked ever so magical and beautiful up close, that you wish the bickering had died down earlier.

“whatever you say, pretty girl”, he leans in for a second kiss, indulging himself more into you, he swears his heart will beat out of the chest as soon as his free hand makes contact with your dark strands of hair.

outside the class stands a grinning jake with a bored sunghoon, and a quite high five is shared between the two, carefully peeking inside.

(📌) :: TAGLIST IS OPEN! @euncsace @ii-nu @leaderwon @dimplewonie @yrhome @heartswonn @jwonistic @aaa-sia @ashtxrie @kgneptun @lilacnini @haechansbbg @river-demon-slayer @in-somnias-world @teddywonss @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @mylstserenade @branchrkive @aishigrey @nctislifue @greyminyoon1 @ro-diaries @rikibun @sleepyxxhead @belowbun nets! @/k-labels

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callsign-relic · 9 months

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I love the first contact au a ton, so I was wondering if I could request something for it for Rung and a GN human reader! I'm not sure if this would count as requesting more than one character, so no worries if you dont want to write it!

Rung is tasked with looking after the human, but he's not sure it'll be a good idea to have them in his office during therapy sessions. Turns out that his patients are ok with it and respond great to having the tiny human chill out nearby during appointments, and now they're the unofficial Therapy Human.

Ooo, this was a fun concept to work with! As well as my first Rung request, thank you for that! Wanted to write something nice and fluffy rather than the cautious/hesitant vibe I usually go for when I write for First Contact, so I hope this is a pleasant surprise :) hope you enjoy!

Warnings: SFW, GN!Human!Reader, First Contact AU

Humans were unpredictable creatures, Rung quickly came to learn.

When the task of watching over you was suddenly assigned to him, all Rung could really do was hesitantly agree. The captain handed off the little creature you were into the therapist’s servo, and through his thick lenses, he could see an expression he could only describe as innocence spread all over your tiny face. Eyes opened wide, previously taking in all of the ship, now locked with Rung’s own optics. You sat quietly in the orange mech’s hold, much to his relief.

Apprehensively, with his free servo, Rung reaches out and offers a single digit. You tear your gaze away from his face and to the offered finger, tilting your head as you stare at it curiously.

“Er, it’s alright, little guy,” Rung assured you despite the fact that he knew full well you couldn’t understand. “I’ll be careful with you.”

And, as if in reply, you suddenly reached out and placed your own hand on the tip of his digit. Looking back towards Rung, you still wore that curious expression, but this time with a small smile. At the same time, the mech’s own faceplate began to break out in a little smile of his own, without his knowledge.

And so, days passed, and you stayed within Rung’s care. You took it upon yourself to make what the therapist believed to be a nest of sorts on the corner of his main work desk, but Rung found he didn’t mind. You contained whatever mess you made and quickly cleaned up after yourself, and if he had to be honest, Rung found your frequent recharge sessions as endearing. Seeing your peaceful little face relax in power down in comparison to the constant liveliness you seemed to carry about you when you were online made his spark swell with a feeling he thought he only had reserved for his personal spaceship replica model collection.

And speaking of, there was also, of course, your seemingly boundless energy during the day. You would entertain yourself easily as Rung dealt with his daily tasks, either finding something to do, or joining along with him despite not really having a clue what was going on. Eventually, the mech found that your favorite spot was high atop his shoulder, either huddled up against his neck cabling or standing tall, taking in the sights.

You liked this spot so much that you often even stayed there during therapy sessions. At first, Rung wasn’t sure how good of an idea it was to leave you there, but he soon found that you were a great addition to his sessions.

“Is that the human?” Whatever mech the ship’s therapist had been seeing for a session that day would always seem to ask.

“It is,” Rung would reply, “Rodimus has me watching over them for the time being. They’re quite evenly tempered.”

There’s typically a caution to the other mech’s face as they ponder if they should even ask the question weighing so heavily on their mind, but the kind look Rung would offer them always seemed to encourage them otherwise.

“Can I… hold them?”

And so, after Rung carefully scoops you up from your perch on his shoulder, he slowly introduces you into the other mech’s hands. You step out of the orange mech’s familiar hands, and the new set of servos you find yourself in at that time are anyone’s guess. Some days, it’s a massive pair of hands, dwarfing you entirely, yet still handling you with the utmost care as they absentmindedly rubbed at your back or stroked a digit through your hair in well intentioned curiosity. Other times, you’re in the hands of a minibot constantly cooing at you in wonder, with you barely fitting in their palm as you stand tall.

No matter how well or poorly a session seems to go, there is always one thing all of Rung’s patients seem to agree upon: having something to do with their hands as they think is a great stimulant for their processors. Thankfully, neither you or Rung seem to mind the pampering treatment you receive throughout the day, so it appears to be quite the mutually beneficial relationship.

As the final mech leaves for Rung’s last session of the day, the orange bot takes you carefully into his servos, ready to deposit you back into your spot at his desk. However, when he motions his hand down for you to hop off, you don’t budge from your spot. Rung cocks his head in confusion as you seem to scoot away from his outstretched fingers and instead… wrap your little arms around his thumb, resting your suddenly limp form against it.

Rung nearly gasps, gently pushing your body with a single digit to face him a little better— only to find you with your eyes shut, chest rising and falling in a gentle, drowsy rhythm. A relieved breath heaves itself from Rung’s intake, and with massive amounts of care, he plucks you up from your spot on his hand and carries you over to that sweet spot up against his neck between his gingery plating and his dark neck cabling. You’re quick to adjust to your new resting spot, doing your best to wrap your arms against the mech’s comparatively thick neck and folding yourself into the most comfortable position you could.

And as Rung walked about his office, cleaning up and packing work materials away for the day, his spark couldn’t help whirl with delight as he felt your little frame nuzzle up against him in security.

#relic writes #Transformers #Transformers x reader #reader insert #rung #rung Transformers #transformers rung #rung x reader #more than meets the eye #MTMTE #Transformers mtmte #MTMTE x reader #lost light #lost light x reader #maccadams #maccadam

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whole-circus · 10 months

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Creepypastas and small things they would do for you when you depressed!

➥ Jeff the Killer, Homicidal Liu, Eyeless Jack, Masky, Ben Drowned, "Ticci" Toby Hi, please dont be scared to get help if you feel like you need it - obvious thing but your feelings valid and you matter so much! And my DMs are always open! >:)

.•┈••✦ 🖤 ✦••┈•.

☆ Jeff the Killer

Okay, Jeff isn't the best when it comes to comforting people, even if he really cares about them. He feels lost and has no idea what to do, but seeing you all miserable makes his heart break. Thats why I think he would do small acts of service. Don't expect a lot from him - he loves you, but he really is so awkward.. Thats why he brings you meals (he can't cook for shit), open the window in your room and let some air to it, he even clean around! Jeff also loves to spoil you! He know that he isn't the most affectionate, so he gives you a lot of small gifts! Maybe nice looking rocks, flowers, jewlery stolen from his victims....all romantic! Also things that reminds you of him! The one based on your personality, likes and stuf!! And dont even try to say that you dont deserve all that.. because deep down you mean everything to Jeff! Come on, there is a reason why he keept you alive, huh?

☆ Homicidal Liu

Absolute sweetheart when it comes to comforting you! You had a rough, long day? Even worse than normally? He is right here with you, doing his best. You just wanna seat in silence? Too tired to talk? Liu will be here. No sign of judgement on his face, just his typical soft and full of compasion smile. If you feel okay with him touching you, he would hold your hand or offer you a hug. No worries, you can stay in his soft embrace as long as you need it - its just you both agaist the world. He just want to make sure that you know he is here for you. Liu would talk about all things you are worried, trying to find solution if its possible, but he is also not too pushy when it comes to that. And no matter how you feel now, or if you will yell and cry, pushing him away - he is always here to got your back.

☆ Eyeless Jack

Jack is just another person with this comforting aura. At the end of hard day, you can't help but want cuddle to him and sob into his arms..And Jack is a great listener, always wanting to make you feel that your suffer is visible and heard! Thats why he is the best person to come vent to, or maybe just stay in his presence if you are too tired to talk! He doesn't talk too much, but he can if you want. Always ready to say something to cheer you up, and he doesn't make this stupid comments like "you dont look depressed" or "yeah same lol"! You are his everything and if you need a bit of help? Thats what relationship is all about, he doesnt mind at all! Just cuddle to him, tell him every thought of yours while he caress your head and gently rock back and forth!

☆ Masky

If Masky really does care about you (no worries, he does) he will be great when it comes to taking care about your body. Depression suck and we all know that well. Sometimes it takes away all of your energy and motivation, and its harder to take care of yourself. Thats why you have him! Masky would look after you a lot! He would check if you had eaten - you haven't? He will make you anything to eat, even for you to take small bite becasue you dont have appetite! Have problem with keeping yourself clean? Would help you shower or just clan with wet tissues, brush your teeth and wash your hair. And if your room gets too messy? Has no problem with helping you or just cleaning it by himself. He also keeps an eye on your sleep schedule! Masky doesn't judge - he knows how hard you already have it, and he just want to help. And needing help doesn't make you weak!

☆ Ben Drowned

Listen, Ben is such a dummy and cutie..he would try to make you laugh so bad..! He isnt doing it in this insistent, annoying way - he just do everything he can to make you smile! Cracking more jokes than usually, doing silly faces or you two could watch some silly video with cats/dogs...doesnt matter, he just try so much! He is also good person to stay in home with. He totally gets if you dont feel like socializing and going out, he already made you both a place so you could either play with him or just watch him play. Doesnt matter if you wanna talk, or if small-talk makes you annoyed and you just prefer to seat in silence. Big cuddle bug, so if that makes you feel better then he couldnt ask for more! Ben literally wants to make you feel even slightly better, but he also understand what you are going through and will always be by your side!

☆ "Ticci" Toby

As I said many many times, Toby is curious one - always ready to explore and do some fun stuff. And that makes him the perfect guy to make your days a bit brighter! Toby wants to be here for you, trying his best to get you out of bed and try new hobbies with you. When you are depressed its so easy to get into a routine, and just suffer from sadness and bad thoughts, laying in bed all day and starring at ceiling! And Toby doesn't want that silly! So no matter what is it- baking, cocking, some sport or artsy stuff - he loves that! But no worries, if you dont have that much energy, he will gladly stay with you in home, cuddling and watching movies. Its hard to be bored around him, he has some calming aura around. He understands that he won't make your deprresion dissapear, but Toby wants to make your days even a bit better.

.•┈••✦ 🖤 ✦••┈•.

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yeondollie · 3 months

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ʙᴀᴍ ʏᴀɴɢ ɢᴀɴɢ ౨ৎ ♡ .ᐟ

'i closed the chapter on the days we spent together.'

. . warnings ; ANGST .ᐟ, breaking up, argument, fem reader, taehyun is kinda mean, crying, heartbreak, reader is needy, taehyun gets annoyed of reader, just over all sad ecfhuehfusih !!

a/n ; i have been listening in bam yang gang on repeat its so so so good but so sad :(. the beat is so adorable and so is bibi i love her sm sm but the song is so sad and as soon as i heard it i thought about making a story with it . this is just a drabble so i dont have a word count sorry :< anyways, enjoy !! ₊˚⊹ ᰔ

"why do you want so much out of me? can i have some peace and quiet to myself? god.." here we were again. arguing with taehyun was getting more and more common, though you hated it. taehyun knew you were a sensitive person and didn't like conflict but you were just pissing him off lately.

you didn't know what to say really. though you were only trying to check up on him after work, he wasn't having it. "it's like you're attached to my hip, truly." you suck in the tears in your eyes as he says this. you didn't wanna fight, you just wanted to please him in any way you could.

"yes i-i.. i'll give you time. i’m sorry." you say, tearing still welling in your eyes. this, for some reason, set taehyun off completely. why couldn’t you stand up for yourself? it was pathetic in his eyes. “see! thats why im upset. you’re like a doormat- you get walked all over, it’s pathetic.” he scoffs, letting out a small laugh even.

holding the tears back, about to flow, you mutter out some words. “you’re r-right, i’m s-sorry.” you sniffle a bit, looking up at the ceiling to avoid the tears falling out of your eyes. you’ve never felt more pathetic in your life, it was such a horrible feeling. taehyun didn’t seem phased at all, walking up and getting in your face.

“so thats it? sorry? you think thats gonna fix everything?” he says, his face only inches from yours. it was weird, usually when he was this close he would be kissing you or looking at you longingly but no. not this time, not anymore. the only time he looked at you was with lust or anger behind his eyes.

it felt like the two of you would only have sex or only argue, it was tiring- so tiring. he used to hold your cold hand in his own warm hand. he used to kiss your forehead and play with your hair, what happened? the tears flickered down your cheek as you answered him. “t-tyun i.. i don’t know what else to d-do.” now quickly wiping your own tears.

when he realizes you’re crying, he doesn’t bat an eye. its like all his love for you was drained from his heart- you hated it so much. “you know what _____? we’re done. i cant fucking do this with you anymore. you’re just so.. so needy and dumb!” he raises his voice, now watching you flinch in front of him.

you didn’t even have the energy to stop him, watching him with blurry eyes. watching how much he changed over the span of you two dating was shocking and saddening to you. oh how you longed for the sweet taehyun you once had.

before he could exit your house, forever saying bye to him you did one last thing. “taehyun..?” you whisper, not even having the energy to talk loudly. “what?” he whips back at you. you grab his school name tag he gave you, when he first confessed his feelings for you when the two of you were still in high school.

grabbing his name tag, along with your own- you walked up to him gently. you placed your name tag in his hand, looking into his angry eyes. “so you can remember me, you promised me you’d never forget me right?”

his eyes flickered with sympathy one final last time.

#txt fanfic #txt x reader #txt scenarios #txt #yeondolliesworks #tomorrow x together #tubatu #txt angst #beomgyu #kang taehyun #txt taehyun #taehyun x reader #taehyun angst #soobin #huening kai #yeonjun

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werewolf-girlfriend · 10 months

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ive been enabled so let me share some of my thoughts on how to get ur art noticed online

if u want Engagement on ur posts then i believe that its critical to make people care about ur art. the easiest way to do this is to appeal to something they already care about, like fandom, aesthetics/subculture, current events, having fun (people love humor!). a harder but perhaps more fulfilling route is to talk about ur own ocs and projects enough until people start caring about them too

theres an infinite amount of topics people care about out there so id suggest picking something u already care about urself and channel ur art energy there. trying to make art for the most popular things out there regardless own interests is an exercise in misery, id advise against it..! if im allowed to get superstitious for a moment, i do believe that even untrained eyes can tell whether a piece of art was fun to work on or a chore. and besides! if ur having fun then its easier to create more, and the more u create the more chances ull have at getting lucky and having a post seen :)

on a very related note, art is a way to communicate ideas so the quality of the idea being presented in a piece of art is paramount to how popular a post will be. what i mean by this is that technical skill isnt the primary determinant of a posts popularity. if all your posts are portraits of original characters then people will have a hard time connecting with your posts and theyll keep scrolling, even if those portraits are masterpieces! the major exception to this is probably other artists, who ive found usually have a greater appreciation for the technical side of art (we can only speculate as to why..!)

lemme finish by saying that making popular posts and being good at art are two entirely different skillsets, ive seen many incredibly skilled artists with jack shit for notes because they dont give people a reason to care about their stuff NOT TO MENTION its a huge game of luck whether a post will get seen. so dont go insane in pursuit of recognition!

(i dont want to make this post too long so ive included examples from my own art and their note counts with my analysis after the break)

hello and welcome to the extracurricular segment to this post :) i bring yall two pieces from my art blog @werewolf-artfriend:

here we have a portrait of my fursona that im still proud of and a sketch suggesting "what if sniffers (from minecraft) were the size of mountains?" (let it be noted that the sniffer sketch was posted right during the minecraft mob vote = peak interest in the subject of sniffers).

the portrait at the time of writing has a crisp 30 notes, whilst the sniffer sketch has over 2000 notes. from the same artist, on the same blog, posted only a few months apart. i believe this is a good example both of the power of a piece of art having an interesting idea at its core AND of a piece appealing to the interests of the masses

this is of course just two convenient example posts, but i have experienced fan art of popular topics getting thousands of notes a couple of times now, amidst my other furry shit that these days get around 200-300 notes in comparison

this may sound like a really long winded way of saying "fan art make the world go round" but i just want to point out the nuances that

1) it matters what u make fan art of: if a fandom is small or dormant (waiting on new canon content for example) then clearly less people will be excited about the fan art you make. dont expect 10k notes on ur post if the average recent post in the fandom gets around 200 etc etc

2) it doesnt have to be fan art! ive also had some of my bird art get thousands of notes because people simply like birds :) and this applies to ANY topic people care about! the world rly is your oyster on this one

anyway i think ive started rambling dhgdjhgd thanks if u read this far! i hope i got my point across! and if ur feeling down about ur art not being seen then just keep at it okay! keep creating and keep having fun! keep sharing ur ideas and perspectives with the world and ur audience will eventually find u! i love you!

#i dont know if this stuff is obvious but i was like :o when i started viewing things this way! i think it makes sense!#i honestly still have more thoughts on this subject + some more practical advice from my experience #but ive never written a long talk-y post before so uh maybe another day <3 #isa speaks

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vinecradle · 1 year

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05 OMG - girls night out! sort of.. (✿)

scaramouche x fem!reader

masterlist | previous | next

and after a few minutes, you heard a loud crash that came from afar. suspecting it was kaveh, you stood up only to hear nilou somewhat lecturing kaveh.

with her hands on her hips, she spoke. "kaveh, we've gotten noise complaints the past 2 weeks.. i think it's best for you to come in by not barging through the door.."

kaveh just chuckled and ruffled nilou's hair, heading to the couch as he sat down. "alright alright, i'll stop barging in nowadays. anyways, where's layla?" he asked.

nilou huffed playfully at his action and just tidied up her hair again, then looking for the ingredienrs needed for the apple pie they'll be baking.

running your fingers through your hair and yawning, "she woke up from all our notifications earlier, and i think she's trying to sleep again. but she did say she wanted to join in with making the pie so i'm gonna wake her up."

knocking on the door to layla's room, you waited for her or her fungi to open it. "nilou, do we have any vanilla ice cream?" you asked. the said girl soon looked through the freezer and nodded. "yeah! is it for the topping?"

you nodded, and you were about to talk until the door opened. as you walked in, you saw layla hunched over the chair. "you know.. i actually got enough sleep and now i have enough energy.. i'll take a really quick shower first then i'll join in with making the apple pie. you guys can start first.." layla smiled, you returned the action and nodded. "alright."

after getting out of layla's galaxy themed room, you walked over to nilou and helped her find the ingredients needed for the apple pie. "do you know how long this'll take? i've never made an apple pie before.." nilou sweatdropped.

"well.. the first time i made it took like 6 ish hours because i didn't know what i was doing, but now it usually takes 3 hours for me to make them. and thats only the process, not including the dough being in the fridge.." you sighed at the memories of making an apple pie back in elementary, let's just say it did not go well.

you shook your head at the thought, "anyways, kaveh can you please find a bowl? something around medium sized, oh and also cling wrap!" the said male nodded and went on searching for the items needed.

kaveh then brought the bowl and you all started working, you opened up the freezer to get the ice water needed for the pie. "get ready, guys. this'll take a looong time." you said as you winked at them.

nilou chuckles and read the instructions you've written on a hanged whiteboard in the dorm, "do i just add the flour all at once? all 2 ½ cups of it?" she asked.

"mhm! the first few steps are easy so i can let you two work on it first while i prepare everything else we need." you then added the cubed butter, and asked for kaveh to break up into flour with a fork.

kaveh scrunched his face in confusion, "wait, why isn't it breaking up like you said?" and you laughed at his struggle.

"do it a little harder, kaveh. and dont make them too soft just make them break up until lumps the size of um.. peas! yes, peas" you said, and he nodded.

a few minutes whilst kaveh did his thing, layla came out of her room. "can i do the next step?" she asked as everyone nodded in unison. nilou smiled, and held layla's hand. "come on, then!" nilou said.

and after a few moments, kaveh had finished. "now, someone hold the bowl and someone mix." you said, as nilou volunteered to mix the dough. the two got to work, and they also had fun doing it.

smiling, nilou spoke. "andd we're done! yn, would you like to work the dough out?" you tied your hair up and nodded, "hell yea! working out the dough is my favorite part."

┊ ➶ ｡˚ 　　°

"finally-" you stretched, "after 4 ½ hours, we're finally done." kaveh and layla yawned in sync, "i'm gonna take a nap.. we're gonna go at night right? i still have time to nap right?" layla questioned as the three nodded. and with that, layla went to sleep in her room and kaveh laid down happily on the couch.

"okay everyone now let's just rest up. we have a long night ahead of us." you winked and left to your room.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ 　　°

and you all arrived at pardis dhyai, "FUCK!! KAVEH STOP CHASING ME!!!" you screamed and ran as he continued to chase after you, "OH HELL NO STOPPING YOU WOKE ME UP SO SUDDENLY I COULDN'T EAT THE PIE!!"

both girls smiled at the sight, as nilou laughs. "i think we should probably follow them, and take photos of them too."

the night is still young.

• anddd finally finished this chapter with 10% of battery left..

• if i made a playlist for this smau would you guys save it? bc im torn with what songs to add 😵‍💫

summary :: wanting to go back to your dorm from the library, and accidentally leaving a friend's book there not knowing she has the intention of making you give it to someone she's trying to set you up with, a note inside with your number. without anyone realising, the book is in the hands of someone else, and you then wake up to a message from an unknown number.

author's note :: the longest chapter for omg yet, i had sm fun writinf this but i accidentally posted the earlier part and had to redo 😭

taglist (1/2) :: @aeongiies @hrtswinter @zyilas @cofijelli @stuckinadreamland06 @elyionaa @thenightsflower @ohmyfinggod @mikctp @cherrybeomgyu @raideneiari @sakiimeo @xiaosonlybeloved @simp4bakuh03 @kunikuzushiit bolded cannot be tagged!

#genshin fluff #genshin imagines #genshin impact #genshin impact au #genshin au #genshin impact smau #scaramouche smau #scaramouche x female reader #scaramouche x y/n #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche x you #high school smau #modern au #kunikuzushi #wanderer #wanderer x reader #omg vinecradle smau #genshin modern au #vinecradle

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ganondoodle · 3 months

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the way i think about my stories can be so annoying bc there will be a point when i reach a certain story beat after which i dont know how to continue, and the way i do find are usually ... not good .. or i imagine it is not so i think man i cant do that thats so dumb and annoying i gotta think of something better, but then i cant come up with anything better bc once i got a solution to soemthign i cant think of anything smarter- and then i get bored of it as a whole bc man, this really was stupid from the start wasnt it

(this is all some stupid rambling and does NOT represent anythign that will happen in destiny, i swear the actual story with a proper end makes much more sense)

listen to me rambling but this morning i thought about the essentialyl non-canon good "ending" of destiny, a kind of self indulgent dumb lil alternative where everyone lives blah blah, but then of course it cant just end there, bc the end goal of the both of them is to find out the gods plan and secrets and also kill the gods, as you do, then i got a certain point that i found cool (which initially came from the whole thoguht of what if zelda game but you could play demise and it took place after the alternative ending in which the goal is to get rid of the gods) where the fight one of the gods but are kinda losing and as the god is trying to devour demise, as gods do, he abandons his body and his spirit/core, who cant exist without his body so hes still connected through the spirits tail , and climbs through the gods interdimensional weird 'mouth' while its trying to rip him apart to reach the core of the god in a last attempt to take them down with him, while hylia is fighting to keep the god from severing the thin connection he still has to his body but fails just as he reaches the core so the god is killed but his core is immediatelly starting to dissolve and hylia manages to grab his core and put it back into his body and flee from whatever is happeing to that dead god back into hyrule

he survives but is incredibly weak as his spirit has lost half of itself (blade spirits are also forged throguh sacrificing part of their spirit/core permantently but this is besides the point, none of this makes sense anyway), something he obviously hates but cant do anything about really, once a part of their core is gone its gone (not like lost energy but gone gone) but the core is also slowly dissolving further which is a death sentence with no way to act against- then theres a whole quest to .. well, stop that, while hes falling back into self hatred and fear bc hes now so weak that hylia can break his bones without any effort if she were to treat him in any way similar to before and to a deity that all their life was never so fragile, one whos most defining feature IS his power and strength to keep going no matter what, thats gotta be pretty existentially dreadful (and also its a set back to know that they cant just go fight the gods together like that, theres still two more and he cant fight like that)

then i wondered ok what if then, even if the time doesnt quite line up but at this point the entire prophecy cant be done anymore either so everythings out of order, the cloud barrier weakens and zelda is abducted (not by ghirahim) and link goes and tries to find her, but since everythigns not as it should have been he meets hylia and demise (disguised tho) and they immediately know who he is and then go along and try to help link find his friend (hylia does it bc she got the idea to make him find the triforce and wish demises spirit to be restored, since only a mortal can do that and links the most likely candidate to be able to go through the trials of it since he was supposed to already, even if the circumstances are different- demise goes along with it bc hes still trying to deal with essentially slowly dying and not knowing what to do with himself since hes afraid to get into fights or similar, much to his disdain, so hes acting like a companion of sorts, a mentor figure in a way, not knowing what hylias plan is)

i found the idea kinda interesting to have them be like a lil group that goes on links adventured with him, but with strangely intricate knowledge of how the dungeons work, link still doing the heavy lifting but them being there like parents cheering on their kid in a competetion, all the while putting the whole puzzle and dungeon aspect in a way different light bc half of them were never completed (they wanted to escape the prophecy after all) so they all work completely differently, some bosses being maybe some of the gods creatures instead (like the skysw guardians)- the mid journey point being that they find zelda, and who kidnapped her, it being one of the shiekah having most closely worked with hylia before the whole -break the prophecy- thing started (idk if it would be impa .. idea is neat) and is hellbent on making the gods plan work out like it was supposed to, kinda like the inverse of the games plot, so they got ahold of zelda as part of making her into the new hylia (despite hylia being .. right there, but they dont believe it is her truly since the true tm hylia would never betray the gods- ALSO a paralel to how the downfall of demises world worked bc his mortals turned on him after he started destroying their version of the triforce in the belief destroying it would be the only way to save mortals from going to war agaisnt each other for it over and over, mortals believing that their true deity was gone and replaced by a demon despite demise being ..right there)

after link wins the fight and frees zelda from them they in a kind of last effort to do anything against their group they stab demise, normally that wouldnt do shit against him but in his already fading away situation it basically puts him from very slowly dying to actually dying, as a reaction to it hylia kills the mortal (maybe impa idk), which is the first time she does anything like that to a mortal but i like the idea of her being actually super ruthless when it comes to things she cares about

now with a much more dire time limit hylia sends demise back to essentialyl go hide in her temple and try to not die and to trust her having a plan to make this all still work out- he does and once he is away she reveals pretyt much the entire story around why and what is happenign to link and zelda, hylia herself cant go above the clouds as the barrier is still partially up and she cant do anything to reach the triforce either - so she sends link and zelda to go do that, and it works out in the end bc even knowing the truth know, demise was with them on half of their journey so they know and care, he WILL be mad about them wasting their wish on him (even if he is still happy to be alive- i imagined scene where hes watching himself fall apart and die, alone in hylias temple, having to come to terms with the fact that after everything they had went through hed still die alone- it made me cry while thinking about it, yes, yes you are allowed to laugh)

i didnt get that much further but his spirit was essentially reset to when he was in his prime back in the day through the triforces power- something he both likes and despises, it being the gods power of all things that lets him live again, but also lol to use it agaisnt them by giving another chance to the gods greatest enemy- the next plan is of course to kill the next one of the gods but much better prepared, as they cant just go and do the same thign again (neither wants that), one idea was that hylia goes on a secret quest to try and bring back courage (the third deity that demise killed when his world was still thriving) but it involves diving back into the realm of the gods so she doesnt tell him at first, i do think theyd go together in the end, not to fight but to release courage; the whole thing is also an elaborate revenge plot of hylia, how dare the gods do that to him!!

anyway thats most of what i got from that thinking session but its so frustrating bc none of this is even in the actual comic (since it ends in a way that leads into canon skysw, this is some brain fart nooo i want blorbo to live and succeed!!) and its also convoluted and kinda dumb, the idea to inverse the games plot in a way (instead of it being ghirahim trying to bring demise back its someones plan to make the gods prophecy happen no matter what) is neat but i cant have demise almost dying be the thing THREE TIMES, it kinda undercuts his character and is way too much centered around him, all three times also more or less involving it needing help from others to get him back, when his whole thing should be being unkillable bc he jsut keeps refusing to die, also hylia is, as of now in this spaghetti derailment of random thoughts, way too much of a side character, which i dont like, and it all would make people not like demise when im trying to do the exact opposite of that in the main actual comic

i know being super self indulgent and jsut doing what you want is good for the most part but theres a point where it becomes stale cringy fantasies about my blorbo tm and i wanna write at least decent stories- in the end none of this matters anyway as the actual REAL story of destiny is already pretty long and i got no plan to write that alternative 'good ending' anyway and i mostly just thought about it bc "i dont want blorbo to die :(" and "wouldnt it be fun if the entire plot of the game would get messed up and now demise link hylia and zelda etc can all just drink tea together and make plans to get rid of the gods that wanted them all to suffer needlessly"

i probably shouldnt post this as it was really only a vent to get out dumb thoughts from my brain before they poison me into losing interest of the biggest comic project i have worked on so far but i am unable to keep these things to myself so

if you read all of this, im sorry (´。＿。｀)

#ganondoodles talks #zelda #dare i tag it as that #long post #dont read unless you want to cringe #and yes i know even bad art and stories have value #and i know im not as bad as i always think #but this really is the kind of stuff that makes me embarrassed to even be able to think #its all shortened and badly written #but some scenes i got so clearly in my head its like a movie #and those scenes make my brain go wooooooooooooooooo even if they make no sense and i cant fit them together properly #uh oh self doubt #sorry im neither a professional artist nor writer #im autistic with a blorbo and one skill that i only have bc i didnt know what to do with my brains rapid train of thoughts other than draw #big time for “oh no i made people think i am better than i actually am- i am a liar and a cheater oh god” kind of thoughts #the want to just do whatever you want VS wanting to make soemthing of value VS not wanting to embarrass yourself

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multiplicity-positivity · 2 months

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hi uh i could use some advice :<

im a host of a recent system of 20-ish and guh i am t i r e d

im mainly looking for advice on how to switch or just retreat into the headspace/leave front or even just kinda stop being fully aware while still being in front for awhile bc id rlly like to take a break and the realization that im most likely front attracted/frontstuck is kinda making me more tired of being in front

also if it helps at all my(&) system is parogenic + traumagenic in origin (specifically parotraumagenic) and theres kinda iffy communication between members (some of them i have clear communication with and they randomly pop up to say stuff, some i have no idea where they are and some of them i can usually only hear when im directly interacting with them).

afaik (as far as i know) only three?? ppl have rlly "fronted" per se, and the rest have been co-con

i apologize for the long and mildly depressing ask but any help is appreciated also dont forget to hydrate

Hello! We have some posts that might help you that we’d like to share if that’s okay. The first is a post we wrote a while back with some tips on switching from our own experience:

We’d also like to share this post by @rin-and-jade on being frontstuck or frontlocked, and how to go about unsticking yourself!

Our own system host (Parker) is almost always fronting to some extent. It can certainly be exhausting and disheartening fronting nonstop, especially when other members of your system can seemingly come and go as they please. He’s going to put some info under a cut for how he copes with fronting constantly, in case you want some advice on coping with being genuinely unable to switch out!

We hope something here will be helpful for you! We’re wishing you the best of luck with switching out or at least learning how best to cope with fronting in your future!

(Host here - I’ll just write this bit if thats okay. Anyway here’s some stuff I do to deal with The Horrors of perpetual existence)

Meditation

Taking a few moments to sit in comfortable silence can be useful for me when I’m feeling stressed or overwhelmed or straight up exhausted. Here’s how I meditate (I’m no expert and I’m sure there’s better ways to do this… this is just what I do)

- get in a comfortable position in a quiet place where I’m not likely to be disturbed

- set a timer on my phone for 5 minutes

- close my eyes, focus on my breathing

- don’t dwell on any thoughts but also don’t push them away; acknowledge them and let them go

- try to stay still and calm until my timer goes off

And that’s it. Sometimes I get interrupted by an alter or something outside, but for the most part, this is how I’ve been able to meditate effectively.

Rest

I take naps whenever I can. I sit down whenever I can. I’ll literally just close my eyes for a few minutes whenever I can. Our body has issues with chronic fatigue, and fronting constantly can sometimes exacerbate our exhaustion. So yeah I am a huge fan of naps and will often set a timer for like 15-20 minutes and snooze whenever the opportunity arises. Even just lying down with closed eyes can help replenish some energy.

Distractions

Reading, watching something on TV, or playing video games can help give me somewhat of a break even if I’m still fronting. I do tend to try and keep us distracted as much as possible… sometimes to our own detriment. But if you find that you really aren’t ever able to switch out, or if your system is specutien and that’s just the way your system functions, finding things you enjoy that can serve as distractions may help you as well.

Saying No

This one’s tough, but I’m trying to learn to say no when I’m overwhelmed or have too much on my plate. This means sometimes I’ll cancel plans, hand off a responsibility, make a compromise, or turn down an opportunity if I don’t have the energy for it.

Honestly idk how much my addition can help you, but if you find that you’re not ever able to switch out at all please know there’s other folks out there in similar positions. Hoping you can make the most of your situation, anon /genuine

#switching #fronting #frontstuck #leaving the front #specutien

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goldenempyrean · 2 years

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reader and sick!scarlett go ice skating. reader is worried because scarlett just recovered from a nasty cold and doesn’t want her girlfriend to overdo it. scarlett insists she is fine though, it’ll be fun and she feels a lot better. however the cold atmosphere triggers a high fever on scarlett. and as you can imagine, dizzyness and ice skating don’t go very well together

Burning On Ice

Hi!! Hopefully everyones having a great day, I got another fic done :) Dont ask about the title, I wrote it last night and I cant think of another one to change it too 🥲

Summary: You’d taken your wife out to iceskate, unknowingly bringing on a rather high fever in her.

Wordcount: 1316

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░

“Come on, take my hand.” You couldn’t contain your giggle of excitement as you stepped out onto the slippery ice, the cold air nipping at your nose and ears.

“Don’t fall on me.” Scarlett laughed cheekily as she carefully stepped out onto the rink, letting go of her grip on the side of the arena, though she sounded cheerful, you were still able to pick up on the raspy edge her voice had too it.

She’d gotten sick a little over 10 days ago and it had really swept her off her feet, so much so that she’d spent almost 3 whole days in bed, unable to walk without her knees giving out and the rooming spinning around her. Luckily she’d been finally getting back to her usual happy self in the last few days, so you’d both taken the opportunity to head down to seasonal ice-rink your city put up every winter.

Despite the fact the rink was only temporary, it was still pretty big. Big air conditions blew chilly air throughout the arena, causing your extremities to take on a red tinge. Though Scarlett had assured you that she was feeling better, you couldn’t help but insist she wear a thick pair of gloves and a wooly-bobbled hat. The bobble on the end of the hat wasn’t at all necessary but it made her look even more adorable so you couldn’t resist.

You were surprised as how well you are Scarlett were able to skate while holding hands, reaching a reasonable speed as you glided around in a clockwise circle , carefully navigating between other couples and civilians, occasionally dodging the stray child who’d zip wildly infront you of without a second thought of hesitation.

Your pace slowed down roughly 20 minutes later as your burst of excitement slowly wore down, you still had plenty of energy but had taken everything down to a more gentle pace. Now that you were able to focus less on the ice, you looked over to Scarlett, her face bearing her same bright smile. Only across her cheeks sat a very obvious red flush, one which you’d overlooked and had put down to the cold air in the arena. Oh how wrong you were.

There wasn’t an exact time when it started but Scarlett had bumped into you numerous times as she lost her balance, each time you’d ask if she was okay or if she needed to take a break to grab some water but every time she’d flash you a brief wide smile, telling you not to worry

“Oh no, I’m fine!” She’d say reassuringly, “Just lost my balance for a second there.”

If only you’d been more insistent. Time passed as yourself and Scarlett chatted, still skating round the rink. Somehow as you continued skating, one of Scarlett’s gloves came loose and you both stopped at the side of the rink as she tried to pull it on. She was struggling to pull it onto her hand with the other glove still being worn so you offered to help, taking the glove and reaching out to hold her hand. It was as you took her hand, your stomach dropped with worry. It was hot, her skin was hot. It didn’t carry the warmness that would be expected from being kept under a soft glove, no, this was much too warm.

You felt your mind fill with worry, looking up to meet her eyes, another realisation hit you. The flush of cheeks, you moved fast and raised your spare hand to cup her cheek, the heat radiated from it like a furnace. Shit.

Scarlett made a noise of confusion, looking up at her eyes, the glassiness behind them was clear from this distance and you berated yourself for not noticing sooner.

“Jesus Scarlett, you’re really burning up. Why didn’t you say anything?” You asked, your concern seeping into your words.

She mumbled a reply. Another clear sign that she had a pretty high fever raging through her body, “Its not that bad, I feel more cold if anything.” She repeated, and if to also emphasise her words, you felt her hand give a light shake as a shiver ran through her body.

“We’re getting you off the ice.” You said, your voice taking on a ‘no-nonsense’ tone and Scarlett knew better then to argue with you on this.

You took her warm hand in your own, stuffing her glove into your pocket as you came away from the safety of the side, guiding her towards the door of the rink, it was only afew yards ahead of you now.

You barely had time to react when a guy rapidly sped by on your right, the side where Scarlett had been. It had taken her by surprise and she’d lost her balance, the skates hitting the ice with firm clinks as she tried desperately to stay upright. In your attempt you steady her, you’d lost your own footing, landing firmly on the hard surface, your elbow taking the force of the fall. You gave a sharp inhale as the pain ran through your nerves, that was definitely going to leave a sizeable bruise.

You’d heard Scarlett call your name in surprise as you’d hit the ice, “Im so sorry! Are you okay?” She asked worriedly as she held out her slightly shaking hand to you.

Not wanting to do anything to cause her to loose her balance again you nodded and managed to push yourself up off the ice without her help, not that you didn’t appreciate the offer of course, “Its not your fault sweetie. Im fine, just a little bump that’s all.” You took her by the waist as you slowly skated the last few feet before reaching the door, letting Scarlett step off first.

Leaving the ice, you noticed the tension which had settled in her shoulders, “Hey,” You took her hand, taking the other glove off of her hand, “Everything’s okay. Im fine, you’re gonna be okay, we’ll get you some medicine for this temperature when we get home, yeah?”

She sighed and buried her head into her neck, “Its not okay, you got hurt because I lost my balance,” She stifled a sob as her voice cracked, “And today was going perfectly, and- and-“ She broke off as she collected herself, “And everything is just spinning.” She finally stammered.

You kissed her head and ran your hands down her back comfortingly, “Its only a bump sweetie and it was that assholes fault for coming so close to us at that speed. It could’ve been either of us that fell and Im really not hurt,” You whispered as she took deep breaths, “I know you must be pretty dizzy right now, we’re gonna get you home as soon as possible okay? I don’t think your body was ready for just how cold it is in here.”

Scarlett sighed and nodded as she composed herself, “Can we just return these skates and go back home? Skating’s been fun and all but I wanna go home, lay down and cuddle.” She whined cutely, showing a peak of the side which only showed when she was running a fever.

“We can do that baby. We’ll get you home, maybe take a cool shower,” You saw her face frown slightly at the mention of more cold temperatures, you brought your hand back to her cheek as your gently rubbed her temple the way you knew she liked, “It’ll make you feel better baby, then we can cuddle till your heart’s content.”

She smiled at you and you returned the gesture as she sat down on one of the numerous rows of benches and you came to sit down beside her, pressing a soft kiss to her fever flushed cheek, “Lets get these skates off and get you home, yeah?”

Scarlett nodded as she kissed you back, “Yeah.”

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lnkedmyheart · 6 months

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Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Thanks....

In no specific order. Did i take this opportunity to post pics of these characters? Yes.

Revy (Black Lagoon)

A dual wielding gunslinger from Roanapur. She is badass and deeply unhinged. A seriously traumatized woman with solid character flaws and a weirdly pseudo romantic relationship with the guy she kidnapped for a ransom and is now desperately trying to protect without realizing that she can't save his innocence, because he was never innocent and pure.

Fredrica Sawyer (Black Lagoon)

A cleaner from Roanapur, uses a chainsaw as her primary weapon, cannot talk due to a severe injury to her larynx and uses a voice synthesizer. An adorable and creepy goth girl who may or may not have in universe ties to the Texas Chainsaw massacre. Which yes, implies that black lagoon is set in the same universe as the TCM movies.

Dazai Osamu (BSD)

Love the depiction of depression and mental health problems with the guy. Love how he is constantly present everywhere and is seen through everyone else's perspective and yet we know so little about him. He is a dork and a brat and so annoying. He is usually aloof and distant but deep down has the capacity to be tender and kind that is only seen in the rare moments of vulnerability. But he is so hopeful and yet completely convinced he deserves nothing.

Chuuya Nakahara (BSD)

He's such a tragic character like his life is one compromise after another as he gets pushed further and further into a bad situation but he will not let that stop him from making the best out of his situation. His compassion and empathy for even those who hurt him is so powerful but his brutality and intelligence is another aspect that makes him stand out against the other characters of his kind. And then you have his incredible loyalty where he will cross all boundaries to protect those he considers his people. Gorgeous characterization honestly.

Yato (Noragami)

Another extremely tragic character and one who is trying so hard to change his fate despite everything. My guy does NOT catch a single break through the centuries he has been alive and he is still so hopeful. Not to mention letting Bishamon despise him for so long just to protect Kazuma, a guy he barely knew at the time. UGH. And his whole thing for Hiyori and his affection for Yukine. Kill me!

Yukine (Noragami)

This was the first time I cried honestly. His backstory had me curled up in my bed unable to eat for an entire day. And his growth from an annoying unlikeable brat to one of the most lovable characters is crazy. Also no, I will never not cry over Yukine calling Yato 'dad'.

Jeremy Pascal (Tales from the Gas Station)

I didnt realize how much I liked him till I thought he died. In that regard I'm like Jack I guess, neither of us realised how much we cared for this adorkable himbo ex cultist. The fact that he is genuinely heartbroken that his suicide cult abandoned him and committed without him is so...oddly endearing and just the energy he adds is charming. He's also such a great friend to Jack, man better start appreciating him more.

Sorey (Tales of Zestiria)

This is my son. And my sun. He is the most precious, sweetest boy to me. Aside from being ridiculously gay about Mikleo, the guy is what you'd think is a typical hero figure in such a setting. Pure, celibate, sweet and even tempered etc. But he is snarky as hell, constantly teases others, is NOT oblivious contrary to popular opinion. He is also irritable. I also love that he is an archaeology nerd.

Irma Lair (W.I.T.C.H)

I dont remember too much about her but I always really liked her. Enough that she is still amongst my absolute favorites. It probably helps that she was made wlw in the tv series and has some shippy moments with Cornelia in particular.

Balalaika (Black lagoon)

Listen, she is an ex military woman, who went MIA with her entire squad of loyal soldiers and now runs the fucking mafia in Roanapur. Woman is gorgeous and has acid burn scars all down her face and body. And she is terrifying. She will break necks with a smile and values loyalty and efficiency above all else. But she is such a deeply damaged woman who deserved better. But see, the people in Roanapur are there cause this is their last stand before they end up dead.

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bl00dw1tch · 1 year

Text

I really need a name for this au. Anyway i nailed down their color schemes (flats and some character design-y thoughts notes below)

Aw man im really about to go in on this here, ok--ill stick to just design stuff and a bit of Their Deal^tm for now! ill explain the au in full some other day, with a more polished drawing.

Alright so. I am still doing research, its ongoing, but i think ive decided that, in this au, their relationship is something more akin to... in a past life they were the same, but for spiritual development reasons, the qi that made That person split, and went on to reincarnate as Them--narratively this is going to make them function like. Just normal Foils lmao--just with an added umph of it being somewhat literal for them, in the scope of their world, if that makes sense! I dont want to put myself in the box of calling them brothers, bc it just irritates me, but they are Not going to be romantically involved in this au either--SWK has enough trouble in his weirdly uneventful but still tumultuous love life as it is (👀 at Erlang and ZBJ), im not going to torment him by adding his evil clone to that list LMAO. Also LEMH aromantic as hell bc i said so.

Also their both trans thats very super important. Trans monkeys forever obviously

Anyway, So theyre still sort of "the same person", yet not, as they had still Never properly met (until Liu'er chapter)--their both incredibly similar and incredibly different, due to the imbalance of the energies within them and the actions they took for the majority of their lives. SWK is the yang, extroverted and bold and destructive and take-no-shit, while LEMH is the yin, (at least in this story) by being reclusive and a bit of a pushover for the longest time--the, erm.... Outburst, being the result of built up resentment and imbalance within himself spurning him to overcompensate for what he was lacking. It's kind of complicated and intricate and i like it that way if describing it is kind of rough Pfft--but anyway!

Point is, i wanted ALLLL that to be reflected in their designs by giving them plenty of Contrasting but Complimentary, and even sometimes juxtaposed details! The incorrect yin yang belt buckles/brooches are the most obvious one i think, next to the general warm vs. cold color palettes--then there's Liu'er being shirtless and with shorter hair, just to bring a sense of masculinity into his appearance, counterbalancing the fact that he's otherwise very feminine and in line with his Yin nature. Id say i made SWK's hair longer for the same kind of reason, but given that long hair isnt seen as inherently feminine, mileage can vary on that--if one reads it that way then yay, fun detail, and if not, then you still get to be looking as a SWK with long hair, and thats always a win in and of itself.

The red parts of their face are also matching--SWK's making up the over eye and LEMH's the under eye, to visually indicate the "this is the same person split in two" dealio. I also tried to make SWK appear a bit more Rounded and Soft, curving his cheek tuffs and little beard In a bit more (belying a gentler nature and other. Yknow, Round thoughts underneath his theatricality (contrasting with his yang-ish behavior), while LEMH's is sharp and feathered out (bringing to mind hostility and action and other Sharp thoughts, equally in contrast with his usually yin-ish nature).

They were initially going to both have the fillets on their heads, for reasons Like the ones above, but without a shirt Liu'er torso was feeling empty and i felt like he needed something to break up the grey of his fur--so, necklace. Hes bouta get choked tf out dont worry about it ❤

Uhhh thats all i can think of writing down right now, feel free to let me know if any of it is kind of Eh, constructive criticism and all that--if you saw any typos no you didnt, thank you for coming to my ted talk and have a groovy day

#jttw au #sun wukong #xiyouji #liu er mihou #six eared macaque #jackart #horse.txt #god what am i going to call this au. fuck

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notabled-noodle · 2 years

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So ive done some thinking about ADHD

And ik this isn't a diagnostic trait

But I've heard lots of psychologists and psychiatrists and even diagnosed people, mention how adhd people keep on making the same mistakes over and over again cuz they "forget" the outcome that they've witnessed every single time

At first when i started wondering whether i had ADHD or not, that didnt sound like me. Im an anxious person, I triple check whatever I'm gonna do before I do it . Odering food online?? I reread the ingredients and the order 4 times before pressing order. Going to use the bus? I check the time schedule over and over even tho ik i cant have seen the wrong timethe 5 times i checked and rechecked it. So basically I usually leave no room for myself to make mistakes and If i make one I take it hard and never ever make it...

Or so i thought.

The respective mistakes that I make dont affect others. Thats the difference. No one else can spot them other than me. Cuz they don't change anyone's day, mood etc

I think that some subtle mistakes that people with adhd could be repeating are:

Sleeping. Every single day, I promise myself to sleep early to atleast get 8 hours of sleep. And every single night I forget my promise and I just end up finding myself thrown in a crazy rabbit hole in the midst of the night and going to sleep real late and getting barely 5 hours of sleep. Do i understand that its a mistake? Yeah. But do I at the moment forget the outcome? Also yeah.

Doing chores such as laundry, the dishes etc. These tasks are the hell of a neurodivergent person whether its due to a sensory issue, procrastination, the task being too boring? Who knows depends on the person. Often times i find my laundry and dishes piling up and i find myself scared of begining. I make excuses, I give myself a hard time cuz if I have time for washing the dishes then I have time to work/study etc. And yet every single time when i get the motivation and energy to do the dishes...i finish quite fast?? And i always regret not washing them?? Like no matter how many times i do the dishes i always end up convincing myself its some huge hard mission that needs total focua and total lack of responsibiliies

Now Idk if all what i said makes sense. Ive barely known about adhd for a year now. I read up on it to understand a friend whom said they believed to have it..and oh god did i hesitate about it in the beginning. But I did a lot of research and ive related to lots of stuff before deciding on self diagnosing. The main problem was that my symptoms presented subtly and it was hard for me to distinguish them.

I'm sending you this long ask cuz I know how knowledgeable you are on this topic and also because I read all of your posts and find myself agreeing with them

Do you think that these traits could be associated with adhd? Also what other times do you believe people with ADHD end up forgetting about an experience they would have learned about quiet fast were they neurotypical?

yeah, this often comes down to impulsivity, short-term memory problems, and not necessarily being able to think about things in a “cause and effect” way.

the anxiety and the desire to check, double-check, and triple-check everything can come as a direct result of years of being punished for impulsivity. over time, people with ADHD can learn what actions have a negative effect on others, and alter their behaviour to suit. it can be a lot harder to do this when you’re the only one suffering the consequences — you need a lot more self-control as opposed to externally enforced rules and boundaries.

in my experience, people with ADHD seem to be fairly good at breaking things down into past self, present self, and future self. the problem is that we see the future self as a completely different person to the present self. i.e. thinking “I’ll be able to do this tomorrow”, despite having no evidence that you’ll magically be able to learn those skills in 24 hours time.

the examples you included were pretty good! other instances of this could be:

procrastinating hygiene related things, even if you have the energy to do them right now — giving your future self those responsibilities because you’d rather be doing something else right now

quitting a bad habit or starting up a new one — you may want to reduce your screen time, but right now you also really want to see that new YouTube video and oh well, might as well start being good about it tomorrow

generally building tasks up in your head to be harder than they actually are, which then causes the tasks to build up, which makes them even harder than they would’ve been if you’d just done it straight away (a vicious cycle)

in behavioural economics, you’d say that someone with ADHD has intense “future discounting”. that is, we predict that the suffering of tomorrow will be less than the suffering of today. and we also predict that the joy of today will be reduced if we saved that joy until tomorrow. it can be challenging for someone with ADHD to process the concept of “delayed gratification”, because we can’t accurately imagine the reality of our future selves.

I hope this answered your question, and that it helped!

#asks #adhd

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starkid256 · 8 months

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so uhh for cringetober day 2 i dont have the energy to draw so ima show all of my ocs that are just self inserts

________________

1 - rubber ball

my first oc! created on the exact day of october 16, 2020 (oct 16 is actually his birthday! since in canon he was 14 when i created him he'll be turning 17 in 2 weeks) he was also my first self insert. from turning into a very shy and timid but happy go lucky 14 year old with an abusive father and a dead mother living with his girlfriend and her lesbian adoptive mothers to a recovering demiboy 16 year old abuse victim living with his aunt with a trans girlfriend (with lesbian adoptive mothers) and a nonbinary partner who love and support him every day. his backstory (which is that his mother dying when he was 7 trying to break up a bar fight and dealing with another 7 years of verbal and physical abuse from his alcoholic father) has stayed SOMEWHAT the same, but altered in some ways.

________________

2 - robin

created somewhere in 2021-2022 and currently 15, robin was/is an oc who really helped me funnel my anger issues into and let that form who they were. originally their whole personality was getting mad at anyone and everyone, but they were also a dr self insert bc i was really into kris at that time and used robin to act out my little kissy kissy fantasies with kris. oh well. NOW they are a fully 3(?) dimensional character whos usually very defensive and pissy about their emotions due to their abusive father and dead friend. still use them to this day, a lot :3

_________________

3 - ben

(i actually have 2 characters named ben lol)

created (recently) off of my roblox avatar, its sorta a stretch to call them a self insert but oh well. as described, subject v 83n was originally a lab experiment used to attempt to make a human from nothing but chemicals and science. some stuff got complicated so their skin tone is multicolored (cyan = head, white = torso, yellow = left arm, green = right arm, magenta = left leg, red = right leg) and their hair is red making them not suitable. they had to be put down humanely so they were tricked and led into a tube and locked inside. they realized what was happening and broke out of the tube and the building as a whole. now, theyre autism incarnate due to being an underdeveloped prototype attempt to clone a human

(they wear a tv for a head as an aesthetic and their facial expressions are linked to the tv bc of fictional universe magic idgaf lol)

________________

4 - starrs connor

wow the homesyuck hyperfixation is really showing with this one. put my whole sburbussy into this.

created recently when i was in the middle of reading homestuck and didnt know that there are drones that hunt you down if youre a mutant

theyre vriskas partner because i have a partner that kins vriska! also is solluxs besite bc idk i thought itd be cool

oh yeah ALSO their "friend", kitten, made them have ptsd because she physically attacked them whenever their emotions were even slightly out of check

anyways i hope u like it :3333

#cringetober2023 #cringetober 2023 #cringetober 2023 day 2

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keefwho · 8 months

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September 21 - 2023 Thursday

7:52am

I know I want to follow through with some kind of ACT therapy based plan. Coming up with the plan is the hard part. It's gotta be something I can refer back to when I'm slipping up or losing my way. So far I haven't been able to figure out something that works but it's also because I usually don't have the bravery to face the truth that I am slipping up. Instead I tell myself I'm fine, I don't need to brush up on anything. I act like I've been cured just because things are going well. But obviously it's a slow downhill from there until I have a breakdown and realize I've been neglecting important practice.

In fact this sounds extremely similar to something I experienced with my art where I'd neglect to practice or try anything new until my art became static and dull. I'd slowly forget things I learned until I couldn't pull off making anything interesting to me. I'd catch myself and realize all I needed to do was get some fresh intake of visual information. In other words I'd enter a state of artistic reverb with myself, unable to breath. Maybe the exact same thing is happening with my mental health. I'm relatively okay when I'm exploring new perspectives and actively trying to understand my behavior. The problem comes when I act like I've learned it all and slowly degrade to a breaking point.

The art solution was solved with the awareness of the problem and by scheduling a mere 30 minute warmup time every morning where I specifically get out of my comfort zone. If I'm not struggling, I'm not doing it right. My mental state could benefit from a similar solution. I already have the groundwork made by trying to identify and jot down my objective thoughts and feelings every morning. This could be expanded upon to be time I take to do more focused exercises on different ACT topics. Or just some more reading. As much as I want to do it in the morning, I might save it for the afternoon since I have more time I usually don't know what to do with then. Mornings already seem kinda limited.

1:24pm

I've done some reading today so I have my intake of information. For a few days now I've been exercising a philosophy I like, I haven't had to remind myself to keep doing it. I just do it. It's to work myself until I'm tired. Because inherently I enjoy burning energy. It means I'm doing something, moving things around in this world. It means I'm expressing myself no matter what, even if it's just doing the dishes. I enjoy doing things that serve to benefit the greater good. I DONT value being able to enjoy relaxing and playing all day, only in smaller doses (at least right now). I want to create things and push things. I like momentum.

The things I read about in my act book support this grand sort of method of operation. I mean, ACT is the name of the practice for a reason. It's all about acting in accordance with my values. The hard part is overcoming the things that stop me from doing that, all my internal struggles that are holding me back.

Right now I feel like I'm in a sort of 'up' and I know it would be wise to utilize that. I used to resist the wave of up and down and limit myself for the sake of consistency. I've learned trying to keep anything constant is a bad thing, everything needs an up and down kind of cycle to exist. In the past when I'd naturally feel good and have the motivation to do a bunch of things, I'd stop myself because I knew I wouldn't be able to keep it up when the down came back. But in doing so I missed out on a lot of productivity/joy. These days I'm better about recognizing that it's best to use the energy I'm given when I have it.

As usual a huge problem I've caught again is losing touch with who I am. I forget that I am a conscious being in an ever evolving world. I think because of my relative isolation as a child along with unhindered consumption of digital media, I have an inclination to view the world as a sort of video game and people like NPCs. Inherently I get the feeling that there is nothing beyond what I can see and that a lot of people are no more than very simple, meaningless characters. I do not like this about myself, it's not a good worldview and I feel really good when I break out of it every now and then. I want to see the humanity in people better. It doesn't help though that many people are afraid to express themselves and adopt an oversimplified personality to hide behind. And more or less being locked in this room doesn't help me grasp the grandeur of this world. I think that would change if I learned how to drive, I think I'd better understand the true freedom we all have to translate ourselves across the surface of our world.

11:01pm

This morning was leftover pizza and a granola bar for breakfast. Stream was good, sketching was fruitful and I made good progress on the last commission this month. Also finished another YCH and started sketching potential new ones.

I sorted a few boxes while cleaning today and threw some stuff out. Two places I'd consider untamed lands in my cabin are the top of the closet and the compartment next to the toilet. Both of these places could use a little cleaning out. To me they are like the 2 cabinets above most fridges.

Lunch was stir fry noodles. I was surprisingly starving while cooking it and after eating I felt kinda bloated. Something is up with my tummy today and I think it could be the apple oatmeal I made yesterday since apples naturally contain the kind of sugar I think upsets my stomach. I hung out in David's server for the first time in awhile and got cozy while I did my work. Eventually the call turned annoying because 3 guys were basically all making independent noise so I left. I almost finished my Princess Bubblegum picture so it should be done tomorrow.

After a bit of rest, I played Just Dance with Daisy. Usually I try too hard to match the hand movement perfectly but today I let go and vaguely copied the moves in my own way, whatever felt natural.

I kinda goofed around while she worked on her fursuit in call. I was a little self conscious today because in general I don't like how I look, especially my face and hair. I felt sort of ugly today but I knew that was an exaggeration and that it doesn't even matter if I am. I know I shouldn't have to perform for her either. We watched some Adventure Time and youtube videos. I tried playing Starfield but wasn't feeling it. Also tried to finish that Bubblegum pic but wasn't feeling that either. I took a short video to try and scan my vacuum cleaner which seemed to work fine so I might try a room scan tomorrow.

This evening I just felt like existing and I hope I didn't come off as boring or something. I really just wanted to chill in the same space until something naturally came up instead of always searching for something to do or a way to become stimulated. Maybe sometimes I want to do nothing and try to enjoy some simply emotional security.

I've been selfish lately. In a selfish phase if you will. It's much to complicated to fully explain this dynamic I stumble into sometimes but in a way I haven't been myself. I've been operating based on my feelings and have been focused on taking things for myself as a sort of survival mechanism. When I snap out of it I remember how real affection means giving without expecting something back. I remember to enjoy what I have and to be less afraid of losing it. I start to see the importance of my own interests and it's easier to pursue them.

#thoughts #act therapy #journal #diary

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