#i have wrung out all my love for you in this fic and the ao3 notes and stuff

[justporo]

Dumb Ideas

"Staeve's arm was around the vampire’s shoulder who - like every night - acted like he was disgusted by all the affection but leaned into it as soon as one of you tangled their limbs with him. You had one arm slung around the pale elf’s mid with your head on Astarion's shoulder. Which also had the advantage of Staeve being able to caress your cheek and play with your reddish-brown hair - or pinch your ear. Meanwhile you were in the perfect position to nudge the half-drow's side whenever he got too feisty."

Staeve and you decide it's a good idea to pierce each other - while Astarion can't stop commenting on how idiotic that is...

MASTERLIST | AO3

Author's Note: So uhm, @velnna has allowed barbies being smashed with his Staeve and... my brain started to think of a sweet polycule with Staeve, Astarion and my own girl, Tav (the hero to almost all my fics)... how could I resist? And you might be saying "Poro, isn't this very self-indulgent?" to which I would agree, but have you considered that I am down bad for this half-drow? So, @velnna, big thankies again for letting me borrow Staeve again, he's wonderful as are you! <3

Pairing: Astarion/Staeve/Fem!Tav (You) Warnings: well, they pierce each other, so don't do this at home, kids? Wordcount: 4,5k

In today's spoils from taking out the occasional bad guys on your way to bigger fish you had to fry in Baldur's Gate, there was something a bit peculiar.

Quite obviously just before you had gotten to these bandits they must've relieved someone else of a lot of jewellery: beautiful golden necklaces, amulets adorned with shimmering stones of all colours under the sun, delicate silver bracelets - and a surprising amount of piercings.

Back in camp now after a full day of adventuring, the party had started sorting through the valuables.

Staeve was just inspecting the pieces when you came over to him and the vampire. He was turning them around in his fingers while Astarion was captivated by a collier with rubies that matched the colours of his eyes very nicely.

When the half-drow saw you coming out of the corner of his black and teal eyes he looked up and threw you a grin: “Looks like I got myself an upgrade for my ears.”

He winked and immediately pocketed a few golden earrings - just to be sure to have them. You raised an eyebrow at the rogue: “Who says it's only you getting some new ones, eh?”

Stepping closer you grabbed Staeve's hand which still had some more gold rings and bars in it. And then while getting so up close and personal with him that the tips of his forest green hair almost tickled your face you wrung the remaining pieces out of his hand. He let you. And grinned benevolently at your audacity - thieves among each other.

“Sharing is caring, love,” you whispered and mimicked his wink from before exaggeratedly and stood on your tiptoes to press a quick peck onto the half-drow's lips. You felt the corner’s of his mouth curl up more as you kissed him. 

“Oh, don't worry, there is plenty to go around!” Staeve declared cheerfully and opened up his other hand with much more loot.

You narrowed your eyes at him while he rewarded you with a shit-eating grin. “There should be enough for all of us, even for Karlach. Although I'm not quite sure how many she might have,” Staeve mused and looked around to find the barbarian enthralled by Gale explaining to her in excruciating detail how to recognise a real diamond over a fake one.

“Or maybe we could do new ones. Especially since I don't know what these are for,” he held up some half-moon shaped pieces with a bar connecting the curve.

You just shrugged.

Unbeknownst to the two of you, Astarion had snuck up behind you in the meantime. Having - just like Staeve - secured his more than fair share of the spoils already.

“If you're intending to pierce your nipples, darling, I'd be more than interested to see that. Because that's what those are for,” he explained and pointed one of his long fingers at the thing Staeve was still turning around in his hands.

“Or maybe our sweetheart Tav would like to try that out?” Astarion teased as he stepped up even closer  behind you and you felt his hands suddenly cupping your breasts for a short moment and squeezing them upwards - making you yelp. “I'm sure it would suit you terribly well and would make for some extra fun for Staeve and me,” he haughtily whispered close to one of your pointy ears while he tried to make eye contact with Staeve. But the half-drow was too mesmerised by the sight of long elegant fingers presenting a quite alluring view of you exactly in front of his face.

And before you could swat the vampire’s naughty hands away he had already disappeared again with roguish quickness, just laughing. But you wouldn't let yourself be treated like that - not in public anyway. So you went after him, trying to get some revenge.

Meanwhile Staeve held the supposed jewellery for a nipple in front of his chest and looked at it curiously, his lips pursed. Then he simply shrugged and went after his two lovers who were hissing and swearing at each other somewhere at the back of today's campsite.

***

The rest of the party had split up the loot with everyone humming contentedly about the sudden wealth you had fallen into. Astarion had put on the ruby collier to everyone’s entertainment and Karlach had been happy about the still huge amount of new piercings she could take her pick from. Quite some more jokes about how other companions could adorn different parts of their body were made over a generous dinner. The wizard had thrown in a little extra effort and ingredients to celebrate the unexpected financial triumph for it to everyone’s delight.

And once everyone had had their fill of food, laughter, amiable companionship and the sun had set, everyone had retired to their tents - or each other’s for some.

Astarion was languidly laying on the pillows in front of his tent reading, one leg casually angled, the other splayed. He hadn't stayed solitary for long.

Staeve and you had bundled up with him like it had become second nature for all of you: Astarion in the middle, all smothered by you, the other rogue and your joint, multiplied love for him.

Staeve's arm was around the vampire’s shoulder who - like every night - acted like he was disgusted by all the affection but leaned into it as soon as one of you tangled their limbs with him. You had one arm slung around the pale elf’s mid with your head on Astarion's shoulder. Which also had the advantage of Staeve also being able to caress your cheek and play with your reddish-brown hair - or pinch your ear. Meanwhile you were in the perfect position to nudge the half-drow's side whenever he got too feisty.

On top of that you had hooked one leg around the vampire's while Staeve had one of his threaded through the angled one. Effectively you had all immobilised each other as you lay there all knotted.

You were talking about and presenting each other the pieces of jewellery you had saved for yourself, talking about which fit whom better. Or, Staeve and you did. Passing the delicate golden earrings between you, just over where the vampire held his book.

Astarion just occasionally threw in some teasing commentary and eyed the glinting ornate pieces - more than once trying to swat them out of your hands when he got too annoyed with the two of you disturbing his peaceful reading.

Having two lovers so eager and physically affectionate was surely a blessing for the tortured soul and body of the vampire - but it still took him some getting used to. So his usual coping mechanism was to be sassy about everything. Staeve and you knew that by now and usually took it as a hint to give your third a bit more space - however that may look like in the moment.

Right now you had each picked out several pieces and were getting bored anyway. The conversation drifted off. Peaceful silence spread between the three of you.You were toying around with the laces on Astarion’s shirt while Staeve had stuck his nose in the vampire's curls and pressed soft kisses to his scalp.

With your other hand you fidgeted with one of the piercings, letting it wander around your fingers. And while it made another turn around them, a thought slowly formed in your mind. But before you could voice it, someone else broke the quiet moment.

“You two are terribly silent - it's disturbing,” Astarion burst out after a while of neither you or the half-drow saying anything. Sassy, just like you were used to.

“First you're annoyed by us talking and now of the opposite. Make up your mind, darling,” Staeve muttered flatly and softly bit into one of the vampire's pointy ears.

Astarion hissed and snapped his face around to his insolent lover. Pushing him away with his long fingers splayed over the half-drow’s face, his pale skin contrasting with Staeve’s darker skin.

“I was annoyed at you for passing things right in front of my face while I am trying to read,” Astarion snapped back. “Also usually when the two of you are silent like this one of you is about to come up with a really dumb idea that will come back to bite us all,” he snarled in response to the other rogue’s complaint and Staeve grabbed his hand off his face - but not without a small kiss to it.

“You're one to talk Mr ‘I-am-not-a-details-person’,” Staeve gave back, unwilling to be called out by someone with so little talent for coming up with plans himself.

“Rich coming from someone who repeatedly almost got himself killed with his stupid need to throw himself at every blade pointed at Tav or me, my love,” Astarion snapped back again.

The two of them kept bickering and teasing each other playfully until Astarion rolled his crimson eyes and decided to end the argument by grabbing Staeve's face and kissing him. Up until both men were merely softly humming and moaning, content with being wrapped up in each other.

This so far had always ended any dissonance between the three of you for good. No opportunity for arguing when mouths were occupied otherwise.

You observed the scene as those two turned more to each other, laying on their sides. You moved so you were basically spooning the vampire, your head still on his shoulder but now from behind. You let your hand wander from Astarion’s waist to Staeve’s hand that was cupping the vampire’s cheek along with the kiss. Letting your fingers softly trace down his freckled arm and eliciting a light shiver from him. His eyes flew open, gaze softening at you and your soft caress. The three of you stayed like that for a long time, making you almost forget your idea.

“But what if we actually got some new piercings?” you posed as a question when the two rogues finally broke their kiss and stared tenderly at each other after.

Staeve's gaze immediately snapped to you and he began grinning, face lighting up with some radiant energy. You could always count on him for a quick and probably somewhat stupid idea.

“Absolutely not,” Astarion exclaimed though and huddled around so he lay as before, picking his book up again and forcing both you and Staeve to readjust positions again. Well, his standpoint on the whole thing was clear.

But Staeve and you were still grinning at each other in agreement.

“You do whatever you imbeciles want but no one is touching me with a needle!” the vampire reiterated and shimmied himself around deeper into his pillows. A steep wrinkle formed between his furrowed brows as he made a show of focusing on his book again, basically making the pages snap as he opened it up at his bookmark. But Staeve was already up and about to grab supplies for your endeavour.

“Your loss then,” you whispered to Astarion and leaned over for a quick kiss to take the frown of his face. It worked quite nicely.

“Don't let Staeve poke your eye out, darling,” Astarion purred when you pulled away again, raising one of his eyebrows.

You stuck your tongue out at him and made to get up. But the remaining rogue quickly grabbed for your wrist and pulled you back onto him for a longer, deeper kiss - arm around your waist so you couldn’t so easily escape.

“Don't poke out his either, sweetheart,” Astarion mumbled when you withdrew “I like my lovers each with both their pretty eyes.”

You gave him a peck onto the tip of his nose.

“Well, who says I'm not doing the nipple piercings after all?” you retorted and jumped up to go after the half-drow while Astarion offered you a fiendish grin at the proposition.

Shortly after, you and Staeve had returned with supplies: needles out of your packs, strong liquor from the camp supplies and of course some suiting gold rings.

Despite the expressed interest for something else, you had decided to let Staeve pierce your bottom lip so you could put a ring through it. And now after he had poured some alcohol over the needle you were sitting in front of each other with crossed legs - while Astarion watched from the back with a perpetually raised eyebrow.

“Have you done this before?” you asked the half-drow as he bit his lip and obviously didn't know how to get going.

“Of course! I've done all my piercings myself. Also pierced others before,” he answered and kept inspecting your lips as if there was something new to see. As if he wasn’t staring enough at them every single day already.

You eyed Staeve's ears and the rings dangling from them. Some of the spots had healed a little roughly it seemed. “And all your victims so far still live?” you asked sceptically and grabbed the bottle of liquor that Staeve still had beside him to take a good swig from it. Staeve pressed his lips into a thin line as he watched you drink, clearly not even thinking the question worth an answer.

“Having second thoughts, darling?” Astarion threw in sarcastically, staring at you from under his brows when he had seen your questioning glance at Staeve's answer.

“I'm surprised you'd let him put a needle into you. Some days I'm surprised he remembers to use the pointy end of his dagger,” the vampire continued while letting his eyes drop to his book again and pointedly turned over to the next page.

Staeve puckered his lips and stared down Astarion who must've felt it and lifted his gaze again to stare right back. “Just leave me something to kiss,” the pale elf concluded and went back to reading.

The half-drow sighed and grabbed the bottle of liquor from you and also downed a fair amount - not exactly adding to your trust in him. But with some liquid courage within him he cracked his neck and made to get to work.

He softly grabbed your bottom lip between his index and thumb, softly tugging. His teal eyes flitted over it while he hesitantly brought up the needle to it. Meanwhile your silver eyes remained firmly on your partner, watching as his lips slightly parted and a light frown formed on his face. Silence spread for a few long heartbeats.

“Your hands are trembling, love,” you muttered, with as much clarity as your caught bottom lip allowed for.

Staeve's eyes jumped to yours, a hint of desperation lit up in his eyes.

“How am I supposed to do this with you staring at me like that, sweetie, hm?”

One of your eyebrows jumped up, lips curling into a smirk.

“So what you're saying is I am distracting you with my piercing eyes?” you teased.

Staeve rolled his eyes at you but smiled. And both of you heard how Astarion clicked his tongue at you.

“I don't want to hurt you,” the half-drow whispered once he had shaken off your stupid joke.

“Surprisingly this doesn't seem to be a common problem with you,” you gave back slightly breathy and watched a soft shade of pink colour Staeve's cheeks.

Then he tugged harder on your lip, making you whimper slightly in the process. “Well, if you say so, Tav,” your lover teased in a low tone, leaning ever closer to you with a mischievous glint in his eyes, biting his own lip now.

“Please, don't have too much fun without me,” Astarion commented from the back in a mockingly dry and bored tone.

Your eyes jumped to the vampire who wasn't even looking at you.

And suddenly you felt a sharp sting that caught you off guard. A single yelp left you, then you looked back at Staeve and - blinking a few times to manage the pain - realised that he had pushed the needle cleanly through. He grinned triumphantly at you.

Without letting go of the needle he grabbed the golden ring you had picked out and carefully threaded it around your bottom lip once he had pulled the needle out. Then he softly dabbed off some blood with some clean cloth.

You didn't even further react to all of it until he finished his job with a very delicate kiss on your lips (that still sent another sting of pain through the wound but you barely minded).

“There you go,” Staeve grinned at you. “Looks hot!”

You grinned back and flinched only a little when you felt some pain from the movement.

“Turn your head for me, darling?” Astarion demanded back from his vantage point. You obeyed and underlined your new accessory by adding a playful wink. The vampire rewarded you with his signature smirk and hummed approvingly: “I have to agree with you, Staeve darling, it does suit her.”

The half-drow puffed out his chest in pride, extremely satisfied with himself and his work. He kept looking at you, eyes wandering over your new piece of jewellery again and again.

Then, while pain began to slowly throb through your lip you got up from your cross-legged position.

“Now your turn,” you said as you got up and grabbed a fresh needle. Staeve's mouth moved silently as you quickly poured some of the alcohol over the needle and were already reaching for one of his ears. He had opted for another earring for a longer row down his pointy ears.

What he had not opted for was how fast and eager you were to get to it now that you were already dealt with. He lifted his hands defensively and leaned away from you.

“Don't you just want to take a break first, see how you are with the pa-” “Don't chicken out on me, darling,” you immediately interrupted him and grabbed for his ear with a wicked grin and glint in your eyes.

Staeve yelped and still tried to lean away from you despite you already having a grip on him. This went on until he lost balance and toppled over. You had no problem with this and quickly followed him, climbing onto him until you were straddling him - his ear still in your grasp and in your other hand the needle.

“Love, I'd really appreciate some of the restraint I showed towards you,” the half-drow pleaded, one hand still held up to guard himself and with the other holding himself slightly upward to not fully lose control of the situation.

“Looks like someone delights a lot more in pain than you do, Staeve love,” the vampire once more threw in. This time he had actually lowered his book. This was all way too entertaining now.

You answered your vampire with another fiendish grin, then looked at the rogue beneath you once more.

“Have mercy, darling!” Staeve pleaded once more but you saw now how he could barely contain a grin himself. The twitching corners of his mouth gave him away.

“This is going to be it, Staeve? This is how you'd beg when she basically has you by the balls? Pathetic,” Astarion teased ruthlessly and then clicked his tongue again. Staeve and you shared a glance. Both of you knew the vampire would make much more of a fuss would he be in the half-drow’s position now.

The rogue beneath you made a slightly despaired noise, then took another breath and looked you straight in the eyes: “Alright, you know what. Tav, ge- wait a second!” He interrupted himself and grabbed the bottle of liquor again, downing the rest of it with impressive speed.

“Get it over with,” he finished and then turned his head slightly to give you better access to the side of his head. He was still eyeing you cautiously.

And as you moved in until the needle was almost touching his ear, his free hand snapped up and grabbed your hand: “Count to three? Please?”

His eyes were genuine this time when he asked that of you. Your gaze softened, your hand with the needle dropped slightly. And with your other you softly let your thumb wander over your lover's much darker skin.

“You don't have to do this, Staeve,” you whispered and let go of his ear to softly cup his cheek and turn his face around to you. You softly pressed a kiss to his lips, biting through the pain immediately shooting through your lip doing this. Staeve let go of your hand to mirror you, the pad of his thumb softly stroking over your cheek as you kissed.

But when you lifted your head up again you saw the determined glint in his eyes, being sure he wouldn't pull out of this, no matter what.

“Hells no, I want to do this. Just - count to three,” he asked of you. You simply smirked and grabbed his chin to turn his head back to the former position.

“Ready?” you asked and felt how some nervousness welled up inside you too as you carefully aligned the needle with your partner's ear.

Staeve slightly nodded as he looked at you. He trusted you after all. Even Astarion was still watching right now.

You took a deep breath - as did he. Your eyes were firmly on him.

“One,” you said - and pushed the needle through the half-drow’s ear.

Naturally, you took him fully by surprise. His mouth opened, ready to let out a yowl of pain but then realised it wasn’t nearly as bad as he thought. “Oww?” he made, more question than exclamation of pain, while you already pulled the needle through and fiddled with his new earring.

“Well, I could do that again anytime,” Staeve boasted afterwards and leaned forward - until he had to wrap his arms around you to stop you from falling off his lap. You grabbed a cloth and cleaned up his ear while he kept grinning at you insufferably and you pouted at him for how easily he swatted away his hesitancy from before.

“You like it, darling?” he shouted towards Astarion fishing for a compliment like you had gotten and meanwhile fully ignored your attitude.

The vampire rolled his eyes then nodded in exaggeration at Staeve, putting on some massive histrionics. Then he rolled his eyes again and went back to reading.

“Are you guys done now? Can I finally read in peace again?” Astarion spat towards you as Staeve let his hand wander up your back and rubbed the tip of his nose against yours.

“Still no nipple piercings for you?” the half-drow suggested cheekily and threw his other lover a glance. But the addressed vampire just stared at him in annoyance for his insolent proposition and shook his head - moving up his book to block both of you out of his view while he muttered something under his breath. Something about what he must have done to end up in this situation.

And while he kept softly muttering to himself, Staeve looked back at you, softly motioning towards Astarion with his head and a slight grin on his lips. You immediately fully understood his intention.

Without further need for communication the two of you dashed back towards your third and smothered him in between you: showering him with kisses while wrapping all of your limbs around him. Basically giving him not a single chance to escape your joint affection. The book was quickly wrestled out of his hand and discarded to the side.

Of course the vampire took it with hissing and many very verbal complaints but he simply couldn’t resist his partners showering him with the love he deserved. In the end he let himself be happily swept up between the two of you. All of the affection making him almost forget that it hadn’t always been like that.

It took a while before the tangle of limbs calmed down again. By the end you were almost in the same position again as you had started the whole night with, neatly wrapped up in each other.

Astarion looked at the two of you softly since you had seemingly used up all of your chaotic energy for the day.

When he took in your face, one of his eyebrows jumped up as he looked down to your freshly pierced lip. By now you could certainly feel it swell up and how it began to throb in pain.

Before you could question his intention, Astarion leaned towards you and softly licked up a fresh trickle of blood from the wound. All while retaining eye contact with you and sending shivers down your spine. Afterwards his lips stayed for a kiss - cautious of course, to not cause you more pain. You would have loved to deepen the kiss more and see where it could possibly lead. But you knew the pain would make you regret it and so it remained quite chaste.

When the kiss ended, Staeve immediately inserted himself back into the situation: “And are you taking care of my ear too, or…”

“I’m definitely not going to lick your godsdamned ear, Staeve!” Astarion answered with a snarl.

The other rogue pouted.

And that surprisingly was all that had been needed for Astarion to give in despite himself. With a loud sigh, he turned over and softly pressed some light kisses to his lover’s new earring. Staeve grinned at him contentedly and drew him back in for another open-mouthed kiss that went on until all of you slowly felt the exhaustion of the day finally catch up with you.

Slowly the three of you settled into serene silence: only the campfire still crackling, soft breaths drifting off into the aether and the sound of two hearts beating for three filled the night now.

It would have been perfect to just drift into your dreams now - if only it hadn’t been for the pain that now really kept bothering you.

You caught Staeve’s gaze and saw the same agony mirrored on his face - especially since he was laying on the side of his freshly pierced ear. You made a face towards your half-drow partner. He answered you in like.

But neither of you would have bothered to get up and do something about it. Especially not if it meant letting go of your vampire for only a second.

But Astarion noticed anyway.

“Regretting the consequences of your actions, darlings?” he teased with a bit of bite in his tone. But when both you and Staeve made big eyes at him, he simply sighed. Then he tried to detangle himself with quite some effort and got up.

“Where are you going, Astarion? You can’t just leave us here, not if we’re hurting!” you exclaimed and immediately shimmied over into Staeve’s open arms since the spot between you was empty now.

“I’m going to get the druid to fix you up. I can’t have you die of an infection because of this. Not before either the tadpole or I get to you,” Astarion responded with some annoyance masking his actual care for the two of you as he was already stomping away.

“Or do you rather want me to get Shadowheart?” the vampire teased you.

Staeve and you looked at each other. Both of you could imagine the amount of judgement you’d receive from the cleric.

“Halsin,” you exclaimed in unison and heard Astarion laugh slightly in response. And then you waited until your temporary missing piece returned to make the three of you whole again.

Taglist (DM if you want to be added please): @spacebarbarianweird @sunfire-ancunin @tragedybunny @dependsonthedream @tallymonster @magazzne @micropoe10 @aoirohi @my-bunny-prince @lumienyx @fayeriess @darlingxdragon @hereliesblackdragon @ayselluna @ajokeformur-ray @i-cant-get-into-my-other-account @rikuyrk06 @marina-and-the-memes

#astarion #astarion x tav #baldurs gate #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate iii #astarion x reader #astarion x mc #baldurs gate astarion #astarion x oc #astarion x you #fanfic #fanfiction #astarion ancunin #bg3 spoilers #bg3 #bg3 companions #staeve #astarion x staeve #astarion x staeve x tav

[randomwelcomehomestuff]

Unfinished Business: a Welcome Home Corpse Puppet AU fanfiction

A/N: Just here to let you know that I'm not creative. Like, at all. This is a fanfic of a fanfic inspired by a fan-made AU of a completely unrelated work, but I couldn't get it out of my head so maybe now my brain will be at peace so I can work on my original story (or it will come up with fifty other fanfic ideas because that's more fun than editing).

Anyway, Welcome Home belongs to Clown/partycoffin, the Corpse Puppet AU belongs to @sketchquill, and the fanfic this is based on is a Corpse Bride/Nightmare Before Christmas crossover fic called The Undead Groom by moviefan_92 on Ao3.

Spoiler Alert for all of that media, plus a little for the novel The Pumpkin Queen just because there's a reference here and there, but not too much.

Also C/W: There's a lot of major character death in here.

I may add more to it later if inspiration strikes. Let me know in the comments if you are interested in that.

Okay, I'll shut up, now. Here's the fic.

The carriage jostled down the muddy dirt road. You wrung the handkerchief in your hands as you gazed out the window at the grey sky, occasionally distracted by the raindrops trailing down the glass. Try as you might, you just couldn't cry. You wanted to, but no tears would come.

At least the dreary weather was appropriate for a funeral.

Howdy was watching you. He wasn't one to judge his spouse's appearance, but he did decide that funeral black did not suit you particularly well. Not when he'd seen you in so many other bright, cheerful colors, when you had been happy. When you were like this—mourning—the sparkle in your eyes was gone. He thought you were beautiful when you were happy, somehow still hauntingly so when you were sad, but he would be lying if he said he didn't prefer seeing you smile or laugh.

“Are you alright?” he asked. “I know you and Eddie were close.”

You sighed. “I'll be fine. This isn't my first time dealing with grief.”

Yes, Howdy knew that all too well. The first several days of your marriage had been more awkward than they probably should have been for... obvious reasons. Any time he caught you staring despondently out the window, he knew deep down that you were thinking of Wally.

That didn't have a negative impact on your marriage, though. You were strong and optimistic, and Howdy shared many happy memories with you. You taught him how to play piano, and he in turn taught you how to garden. You even started a small orchard together. Howdy couldn't think of many more signs of a happy home than the smell of apple blossoms in the garden and hallways filled with the sounds of music and laughter. You were comfortable, and your fortunes were secure, (that was the most important thing to both of your parents, and neither of you could ask for much more than your parents' satisfaction).

Most of all, you and Howdy loved each other. Howdy had accepted long ago that yours was a love built off of friendship and mutual respect rather than romance, but it was enough for him, (considering what he grew up witnessing from his parents, he counted that as the greatest success of them all). You recently celebrated your copper anniversary, which baffled Howdy. How could seven years fly by so quickly? Thinking back on everything, he knew that he was completely satisfied with where his life was, as long as you were by his side and happy.

Which is why he hated to see you so sad. He wouldn't rush you through your grief, but he could at least help lighten the load. “Would you like to talk about it?” he asked.

You looked down at the handkerchief in your hands, wadded up beyond recognition, but still as dry as it was when Howdy handed it to you. You smoothed it out over your lap and stared at Howdy's initials embroidered in green in the corner.

Howdy watched you, patient. A deep rumble of thunder rolled through the sky outside.

“I just... hate how somber it was,” you said.

“Funerals typically are.”

“I know, but Eddie wouldn't have wanted that. He was so much more cheerful and... and colorful than that. He'd want people telling funny stories about him and celebrating his life, not... just standing in silence while the dirt is thrown over his casket.” Your shoulders stiffened. “I should have said something.” Now you could feel the tears building up, but they simply would not come. I should be crying. Why am I not crying?

Howdy leaned forward and took your hand, and you finally looked into his eyes. He was smiling. “He's in a better place, now.”

You smiled at that. Seven years ago, those words would have felt like a hollow attempt at consolation, but now they were a real comfort. Howdy was there when the dead came up to the Land of the Living. He witnessed Eddie and Frank briefly reunite. Now they would never be separated again, and he knew it as well as you did.

Perhaps that was why you couldn't cry: you knew that good things were waiting for Eddie on the other side.

The tears finally spilled over and rolled down your cheeks, but they were not tears of sorrow. You were happy.

Howdy used two of his free hands to cup your face. His smile was soft and understanding as he thumbed away your tears. You stood and shifted over to the seat across from you so you could sit beside him, and his four arms wrapped you up into a tight hug. He pressed a kiss into the top of your head, like he had so many times before. “Everything will be alright,” he whispered.

“I know,” you mumbled into his shoulder.

Lightning flashed outside, followed by a loud clap of thunder. You gripped at Howdy's coat as he leaned forward to look out the window. “That storm is getting much worse.”

“Should we stop somewhere?” you asked.

He nodded. “Most likely.” He reached up to knock on the ceiling of the coach. “Johnson? How are the roads looking?” he called.

Johnson, the driver, shouted something back to Howdy, but his voice was drowned out by a deafening crash. A blinding white light flooded the carriage and the horses whinnied outside in terror. You tried to lean forward to look out the window, but the horses bolted and the momentum sent you crashing to the floor of the coach. You could hear Johnson yelling. Howdy grabbed your arm and tried to haul you back into the seat, but when you looked out the window, what you saw made you freeze.

Lightning had struck a nearby tree. It was on fire. Johnson seemed to have lost the reins, because you could see them flapping in the wind by the window. Howdy was calling your name. Johnson was screaming at the horses to stop.

The carriage was passing the flaming tree right as it started to crackle and groan.

You jumped back into the seat and grabbed Howdy. One of his hands grasped the back of your head and his body tensed around you as if he was bracing himself.

It only took a few seconds—three at most—but it felt like an eternity.

Wood splintered around you as the carriage shattered. A heavy weight came down on you and Howdy, and for a brief, macabre moment, you were amazed by how fragile your bodies really were.

Then everything went black.

There was nothing but darkness for a long time. You tried to move, tried to call out for Howdy, but nothing happened. You were just... nothing.

That thought scared you. There was so much more than that. Light. Color. Noises and smells. Life. You couldn't be nothing, that just wasn't possible. You had memories and goals. You had a spouse and a family. You had an estate to attend to you. You couldn't just... not be.

Panic twisted your stomach into knots, clawed its way up your throat, and came out of your mouth as a scream: “Help! Help me!”

“Alright, alright! Calm down!”

You stopped. That voice sounded familiar, but you couldn't quite put your finger on who it was.

Then you heard another, timid voice. “Is it always like this?”

That one you did recognize, because you had just heard it a few days ago. It was Eddie. Your instinct was to gasp, but you couldn't. I can't breathe. Oh, God, I can't breathe.

The first voice spoke again: “Often, yes. It all depends on the person and how at peace they are.”

There was a shuffling nearby. It was odd, despite the panic coursing through you, your body was strangely... calm. You expected your heart to be thumping fast and heavy in your ears and for your palms to be sweaty, but there was nothing.

The space above you shifted with a low creak and light stabbed your eyes. You flinched, blinked, then stared at the two faces above you blurring into focus.

Eddie and Frank were leaned over, looking down at you. They both offered you sad, soft smiles.

Your neck was stiff as you looked around. Your were laying in some sort of bed. It wasn't comfortable; even though it was all silk, there was no cushion, and the pillow at your head was much too small. Your mind was sluggish like you had just woken from a long nap. You had to blink several times and crane your neck to the left before you realized that Frank was holding open a lid.

You were in a casket.

Your tongue felt like cement in your mouth as you stammered, “Am... am I d-dead?”

Eddie gave you a pitying look. “Oh, Y/N.”

“Come on,” Frank said, “the sooner you get on your feet, the better you'll feel.” He and Eddie grabbed you under your arms and hoisted you out of the casket, which was sitting on a table. They helped you find your footing and Frank instructed you through some stretches to shake off the rigor mortis. You took a moment to look around.

You were in a sort of cavern, full of other caskets sitting on tables. Some looked new, others old and decayed.

“Where are we?” you asked.

“The Land of the Dead. Specifically, an offshoot of our village, just below the graveyard where you were buried,” Frank said.

You felt dizzy. “So... the crash... I didn't make it.”

Eddie put his hand on your shoulder. “No one made it except the driver. When the tree fell, he got thrown off, but he survived. Poor man blames himself for what happened. Thinks he should have kept better hold of the reins or suggested you leave sooner to avoid the storm.” He squeezed your shoulder. “They say you and Howdy died in each other's arms.”

“Howdy...” Your stomach was churning and you wondered if you could still get sick even if you were dead.

Eddie nodded. “Frank had to break a couple of rules, but we went to the Land of the Living to see your funeral—”

“From a safe distance, of course,” Frank interrupted.

“Of course. Your parents spared no expense. They got you a big, beautiful gravestone and there were flowers everywhere. You and Howdy were buried next to each other in the outfits you got married in.”

You glanced down at yourself for the first time and realized he was right, you were wearing the outfit your mother had picked out for your wedding, complete with your wedding band on your left hand.

Not only that, but you were also wearing the other wedding band on your right hand. Wally's wedding band. It was the same ring Wally had worn all those years ago, after you had practiced your vows in the woods. You ended up keeping it for myself since Howdy's mother insisted that you purchase new rings for your next attempt at getting married, (”I'll have no cursed rings at this ceremony,” she said). You could never bring yourself to get rid of it, though, and eventually fell into the habit of wearing it on your right hand while you wore your actual wedding ring on your left.

You were surprised that you had been buried with it, considering everything. Perhaps your family decided that since you wore it all the time, it held sentimental value to you and you'd want to keep it. Or, you shuddered to consider this, your hands were too swollen to get it off.

You shook those thoughts away and looked back to Eddie. “Where is Howdy?” you asked. “If he was buried next to me, shouldn't he be here?”

Frank and Eddie exchanged a glance. “We aren't sure where he is,” Eddie said.

“We've been keeping an eye out for him, but we think he's gone to the upstairs,” Frank added.

“The upstairs?”

“Heaven, Paradise, Nirvana, whatever you call it. You can go to whatever version of the afterlife you choose once you pass on. Unless you're someone like Julie.” They frowned. “Someone like that who has caused suffering for others doesn't get a choice. She's downstairs.”

“So, if there's an upstairs and a downstairs, where are we? The ground floor?”

Frank's mouth twitched into a smile. “Something like that. The people who end up here usually either can't make up their mind where they want to go or have unfinished business. You could join Howdy upstairs, if you wanted.”

You considered this, but the idea made your head spin. Where exactly did Howdy go, and how would you go about joining him?

Frank nodded to a nearby hallway. “We can talk more about this, later. Come on, the others are waiting to see you.”

The others. You perked up a bit remembering them. Sally, Poppy, Barnaby, even your old dog, Scraps. You followed Frank out of the cavern, and Eddie fell into step beside you, whistling a cheery tune as you walked.

The bells were already ringing by the time you reached the village, and as you got closer to the old tavern you could hear a chorus of voices all calling out, “New arrival! New arrival!”

Eddie chuckled beside you. “Poppy is up to her ears in cooking. They just had a Welcome Feast for me the other day.”

You tried to swallow, but your mouth was too dry. God, Eddie's, funeral was just the other day, and now here you were. You weren't sure if you could take part in any kind of feast; your mind was still reeling from everything that had happened.

You entered the tavern and were immediately greeted by Sally, the tragic Shakespearean actor, who gripped your hand and was roughly shaking it as soon as you stepped through the door. “Well, it's about time you showed up!” she said.

“Easy, Sally. Y/N is still adjusting,” Frank said as they came in beside you.

“Yeah, yeah,” Sally said as she tugged you across the room and sat you down at a bar. “So how'd it happen?”

You cleared your throat. “Um. A carriage accident.”

She whistled. “Wow, that's a rough way to go. Do you remember any of it?”

“Not really. I got knocked out pretty quickly.”

There was a loud thud beside you as a familiar, tall blue dog plopped down in the seat on your other side. “Welp, that's good at least,” Barnaby said as he handed you a frothing mug of beer.

“Sure is. Not remembering violent deaths makes the transition a little easier.”

Barnaby leaned over, his eyeball rolling into his right socket, and peered at you. “And judging by all the schmutz on your face, I'm guessing it wasn't a pretty sight.”

“Schmutz?” You gently touched your face and realized that you had a very thick layer of makeup on.

“Oh yeah! We need to get that off you right away. It looks awful.” Sally stood up and cupped her hands around her mouth. “Poppyyyyyy! I need a mirrooooooooor!”

“One moment, please!” a high-pitched, crow-like voice squawked from the kitchen. “Goodness me, I'm going to start molting again from all these feasts.” Poppy walked into the space behind the bar, wiping her wings on her apron, and she looked up at you. “Oh, my dear Y/N. I heard the rumors, but I didn't know if they were true. I'm so sorry.”

You couldn't help but smile at Poppy, remembering the way she comforted you when you first came here and were scared out of your wits. “I'm fine. It's good to see you again.”

She smiled back at you before digging through her apron pocket. “Let's see, I think I have a mirror in here, somewhere. Ah!” She withdrew a tiny hand mirror and handed it to you. “Please don't be insulted, but whoever did your funeral makeup certainly did you a disservice.”

You looked into the mirror and blanched when you realized that they were right. The makeup didn't match your skin tone and made you look horribly discolored, and they seemed to try and make up for that by applying huge splotches of rouge to your cheeks and lips. You grimaced at your reflection.

“Uh huh. Here,” Sally said while handing you a rag.

You went to work cleaning up your face and neck, scrubbing the makeup away. You froze when you glanced at your reflection again and noticed just how much you had changed. Your skin had taken on a bluish tint, and you had massive stitches across your neck and down your right temple. You gently prodded at your temple and flinched when a fraction of your skull shifted under your touch. No, the accident wasn't pretty at all.

Sally noticed this and took the rag and mirror from you. “Here, I'll finish,” she said.

“You'll get used to it,” Barnaby said as Sally got to work. “Imagine how Poppy was when she first got here and saw that half of her face was missing.”

Sally finished and nodded with satisfaction. “There. Now you look like one of us!”

“The stitches are a nice touch, too. Makes you look like a pirate,” Barnaby said.

Sally gasped. “Oooo. We could do a production of The Pirates of Penzance! Are you a good singer?”

“Me? Well, uh—”

Barnaby laughed then stood up. “Care if I go ahead and audition?” He started singing “I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General” before anyone could protest, going out of his way to use a silly voice and make larger-than-life funny gestures.

Eddie took Barnaby's seat beside you and helped himself to the drink that Poppy put down in front of him. “So, what do you think you're going to do now?”

You pondered this for a moment. “I'm not sure. What can I do?”

“Whatever you want, really. You could move on to another afterlife upstairs, or you could stay here. Take care of whatever unfinished business you have.��

You shrugged. “I guess that's why I'm here, huh? I just can't make up my mind?”

Poppy leaned against the bar and giggled. “Oh, no. I think you do have unfinished business.”

You tilted your head. “What?”

Sally's attention was brought back to you and she propped her elbows on the bar, giving you a sly smile. “Oh, yeah. And I bet we all know what it is.”

“I'm confused,” you said.

“Oh, come on. Do we really need to spell it out for you?” she said with a groan. “How about the guy you almost drank poison for?”

Your eyes widened. “Wally?”

Sally and Poppy both nodded. Barnaby gave up on his performance when he realized no one was watching him juggle three empty beer mugs and approached you again. “Sounds about right,” he said.

“But that's not possible. Wally, he... he's gone. I saw him disappear.”

Frank approached you from behind and placed their hand on your shoulder. “He's not gone. Souls don't just disappear like that.”

“Yeah, and he visited us a couple of weeks ago,” Barnaby added.

You felt something deep within you—your heart, maybe? even though it wasn't beating anymore?—jump up at the revelation. “Where is he? Upstairs?”

“Nah, I think Poppy would have let us know if he was living in the attic.” Barnaby laughed when Frank gave him a sharp glare.

“Not precisely. Last I heard, he's residing in another in-between kind of place. It's a little bit harder to get there since it's separate from our world, but he's figured it out well enough that he still visits us from time to time,” Frank said.

Your throat clenched like a fist and your eyes were stinging. You pressed your hands against your mouth and sniffled.

Poppy grinned. “I knew it.”

“Please. We all knew it,” Sally said.

“How do I find him?” you said.

Frank put a hand to his chin. “Well, he told me that there are a couple of ways to get there, but for most of them you have to know what you're looking for. I haven't been able to go there, myself, so I won't be very much help, there.” They tapped his jaw and hummed a bit in thought. “I suppose I could give you the spell I gave Wally before. It's a bit of a gamble, but I'm sure it won't be much of a problem for you. It's a spell to help you find your heart's desire. I gave it to him when he first got here in case he ever changed his mind about that unfinished business of his, and he kept it with him for years. Didn't use it until that day in the Land of the Living.”

You remembered that moment vividly, when you watched as Wally's body dissolved into hundreds of blue and grey butterflies. “That was a spell? I thought he was gone.”

Frank shook his head. “I think once he decided that he was satisfied, he needed something to help him move on. He's happy where he is now, if not a little lonely.”

You hugged yourself. You had never considered the possibility of seeing Wally again, and now that you were told that it was possible, your heart seemed to sing at the idea. But something was holding you back.

“What about Howdy?”

Frank sighed. “I can't help you with that. I'm afraid that's a decision you'll have to make on your own.”

“If it makes you feel any better,” Eddie said, “you're not limited to one place. You can visit each afterlife whenever you want. I visited my parents in the upstairs the other day, but I'm staying here to be with Frank.” As he said this, he took Frank's hand and gave them a sweet smile. “So, uh, if you want to see Howdy again, you can. But you don't have to stay anywhere. You're free to do what you want.”

That seemed to loosen some of the tension in your chest. You took a deep breath and let your heart take over. “Okay. How do I use that spell?”

Frank smiled. “We'll need to get some things out of my office.”

You stood and followed Frank out the door. Sally whooped behind you, “Woo hoo! Lover boy's getting his partner back!”

“We'll have that Welcome Feast another time, alright?” Poppy called.

Barnaby just hummed to himself, considering adding another verse to “Remains of the Day” so that the story would have a happy ending, after all. Then again, he'd probably have to sacrifice the catchy instrumental part in the middle so the song wasn't too long, and he wasn't willing to do that.

You and Eddie stood in silence as you watched Frank dig through his various supplies. He scrutinized their spell book as he carefully measured and combined the ingredients. When they were finished, he handed you a small capsule the size of a marble.

“This is it?” you asked.

He nodded. “It looks unassuming, but it is a very powerful spell. All you have to do is crush it in your hand and you'll be sent to wherever your heart's desire is. Though, you may need to try and focus on one thing, or else you may get sent to the wrong place.”

“But don't worry. If you get lost, just find a graveyard and enter a crypt to go underground, and you'll find a village associated with that grave yard. You should be able to find your way back from there,” Eddie said.

You nodded, staring at the capsule in the palm of your hand.

Without warning, Eddie pulled you into a hug. “Take care of yourself, okay, bud? And you'd better visit us all the time, or I'll come find you, myself.”

You smiled and leaned into his hug. “I will. I promise.”

Frank sniffed and cleared their throat, trying to hide the fact that you reminded him of themselves when he was young and fell in love with Eddie for the first time. “Alright, go on before Eddie decides to make you stay here.”

You turned to Frank and gave him a hug, too. “Thank you,” you whispered.

They awkwardly patted your back. “Of course.” He led you out to his balcony that overlooked the village. “I will warn you, it may be a bit of a bumpy ride.”

You walked to the edge of the balcony, looked back over your shoulder at them as Eddie put his arm around Frank. You took a deep breath—just out of habit at this point, and it was an odd sensation to feel your lungs stretch for the first time in a while—then turned your face up. You closed your eyes and pictured Wally, wherever he was, then you squeezed your right hand until the capsule burst and a fine powder spilled out between your fingers.

Nothing happened, at first. You opened your eyes again and looked down, wondering if you'd done something wrong.

But then you felt another strange sensation: an unraveling, like your body was falling away from you. A gust of wind swirled around you, your feet and the tips of your fingers tingled, and your body transformed into hundreds of butterflies.

Just like Wally.

Normally, you would have been frightened. You weren't. Your heart jumped up in your throat with excitement. You almost laughed, but your face and mouth had been transformed by then.

You were jumbling, fluttering, riding on the wind current, spread out in a great cloud of delicate wings. You tumbled through the air, trying and failing to grasp what was happening and where you were going. The world flew past you in a blur. You felt free.

You jolted when your feet suddenly met solid ground. You blinked, held your hands out in front of you and found them whole again.

You were in a circular clearing in the middle of a grove of trees. You spun around in a circle, taking in your surroundings. The trees were all tall and dark, and each tree on the edge of this clearing had a door carved into it. A four-leaf clover, a big red heart, a Christmas tree? An Easter egg? These were all symbols associated with holidays.

“Oh!” a quiet voice sounded behind you. You turned to face them and stared, slack-jawed, at the person who met you. She was a tall, slender woman standing at the edge of the grove. Her skin was made of a blue fabric and she had long, red hair and wore a colorful, patchwork dress. A small basked was hanging from the crook of her arm, stuffed with sprigs of lavender. Her round, glassy, babydoll eyes blinked at you. She smiled and dipped her head down. “I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting to find anyone else here.”

You struggled to find your words as you were still wrapping your head around the concept that a giant rag doll was talking to you. This was all a lot for you to take in one day. You coughed and said, “No, I'm sorry. I'm just... looking for someone.”

The woman tilted her head. “Is that so? Who are you looking for?”

“A man named Wally Darling. He's a...” You hesitated, unsure how foreign this would be to her.

But she finished the sentence for you. “A corpse? Like you?”

You smiled bashfully. “Yes.”

The woman grinned even bigger. “Then it's a good thing I found you. He's from the same town as me.”

That jolt of excitement shot through you again. It seemed like the spell that Frank made for you worked like a charm. “Really? Can you take me there?”

“Of course.” She walked up to you, her stride small and with a noticeable limp, thought she didn't seem to be in pain. She held out her hand. “My name is Sally, by the way,” she said.

Another Sally, you thought. You shook her hand and introduced yourself. She nodded, then motioned to the side toward a tree with a door shaped like a jack-o-lantern in it. “We'll be heading to Halloween Town. This is the fastest way there,” she continued. She limped to the tree, turned the knob that was disguised as the jack-o-lantern's nose, and the door swung outward. You cautiously approached it and looked down into the hollow tree. There was nothing but darkness, and the door opened to a steep drop-off that you couldn't see the bottom of.

“I find it easiest to just close my eyes and jump,” she said. “I know it can be a bit intimidating sometimes, but I promise, it's perfectly safe. My husband and I come through here all the time.”

You swallowed, grabbed hold of the doorway, and shut your eyes. A gentle breeze blew through, carrying the comforting scent of fallen leaves and caramel apples. A smile crept onto your face, and you pulled yourself through the doorway and jumped.

There was only a second of free fall before you landed smartly on your rear end in a giant pile of leaves. You grunted and clambered to your feet.

Sally appeared beside you. “Are you alright? That happens a lot for first-timers.”

You straightened up and said, “Yeah, I'm fine. Not like I can get much worse.”

She giggled at that and motioned for you to follow her. You walked together down a dirt path that cut through the woods and she asked you about where you came from and how you got here. She was a good listener as you told her everything.

“How do you know Wally?” she asked.

“We, um...” Your face heated up and you found yourself fiddling with the band on your right hand. “It's a long story. Let's just say we're... old friends.”

“I see,” she said with a knowing look that made you blush more. But then she looked forward and said, “Here we are.”

You both crested a hill and looked down on an archway with “Halloween Town” spelled out in black, iron letters. A large town bustled with activity down below. The architecture was conflictingly made of a combination of twisting, curving lines and jagged, sharp angles, and the citizens seemed to enjoy and monochrome color palette with occasional splashes of bright color. You followed Sally down the path and entered the town.

You had to keep yourself from gawking when you saw the first couple of citizens gathered in the town square: a wolf man dressed in tattered flannel chatting with a bulking man dressed in overalls with an axe stuck in his head. They both gawked at you, though, when you came into a view.

“Look! Queen Sally has brought in someone new!” the wolf man exclaimed with a gravelly voice.

You glanced at her. “Queen Sally?”

She blushed. “Ah, yes, I didn't mention that. I'm the Pumpkin Queen.”

“Oh!” You fumbled and started to bow, but Sally stopped you.

“Please, don't. That's exactly why I don't go around announcing that to everyone. Just treat me like you would anyone else.”

You nodded. “Sorry.”

“And don't apologize, either.” She hooked her arm around yours and said, “Now, let's go find Wally.”

She led you away, but not before you noticed that a trio of women, (witches, you guessed, based on their clothes and pointed hats) had gathered around the wolf man and were whispering conspiratorially.

You hadn't gone far before you stumbled upon two more citizens: a man wearing a long trench coat and tall, thin top hat, and an even taller, thin, and gangly skeleton dressed in a pin-stripped suit with tails on his coat and a bat bowtie. They were both leaned over something on a table.

Sally perked up a bit beside you. “Oh, that's my husband over there. He may know where Wally is.” She waved her free hand and called, “Jack! Jack!”

The skeleton looked up and his face split into a wide, toothy grin. “Sally! Perfect timing! Mr. Hyde and I were just testing out his newest creation. Would you care to see?”

She nodded and walked to the table, where Jack presented her with a large, orange bowl of candy with a small sign taped to the front that read “Just Take One.”

“A seemingly normal bowl, yes? Perfectly welcoming to trick-or-treaters.”

“Of course,” she agreed.

“Go and take a piece. Just one.”

Sally did as he said a delicately picked up a wrapped piece of butterscotch. She waited a moment, then raised a brow at him. “Is that all?”

“Precisely, because you were good and only took one. Now, pretend you are a greedy trick-or-treater and try to grab a handful.”

Sally nodded and drove her hand into the bowl, grabbing a large handful of candy, when a ghostly hand jumped from within the depths of the bowl and grabbed her wrist. She gasped, startled, then laughed. “What fun!”

Jack clapped Mr. Hyde on the back. “You see? A brilliant idea! I knew you were an excellent choice for the knew town scientist. Well done!”

Mr Hyde chuckled, pleased with himself. “You flatter me, Jack.”

Sally gently tugged at Jack's arm and whispered to him. He looked at you and his eyes lit up. “Oh, my apologies! I was so caught up in my work, I hadn't noticed you there.” He swept into a low bow. “Jack Skellington, Pumpkin King and Co-Representative of Halloween.” He stood upright and draped an arm over Sally's shoulder. “And you've already met my wife and partner, Sally.” He looked you up and down, then beamed. “We don't get very many new faces, but you seem like you'll fit right in, here.”

You cleared your throat and said, “Actually, Mr. uh, Skellington—”

“Please, Jack is fine.”

“Jack,” you corrected, “I'm actually looking for someone. Wally Darling?”

He raised a brow and glanced at Sally, who only smiled up at him. “Your name wouldn't happen to be Y/N, would it?”

Your eyes widened. “Yes. Why?”

“He talks about you all the time. Oh, he'll be over the moon when he sees you!”

You could have sworn that your heart thudded hearing that, but that couldn't have been possible, could it?

Jack tilted his head and hummed. “I just saw him a moment ago. I may know where he is. Follow me!” He let go of Sally and strode away. You glanced at Sally and she nodded to you, urging you forward, then you jogged to follow the skeleton.

Jack led the way down a twisting cobblestone path that led out of the town and into farmland that mostly consisted of pumpkins. He led you through a graveyard and up a steep hill, and his long strides took him up the hill faster than you could keep up with. You couldn't run out of breath, anymore, but that didn't stop your muscles from aching as you hiked after him. As you reached the top of the hill, you could see another hill in the distance that made the shape of a spiral. As you took in the view, your gaze wandered from the massive spiral and down to the bottom where another there was another pumpkin patch.

You froze when you saw him. There was no mistaking him with his blue, patchwork skin and signature hair style. He wasn't wearing the wedding tuxedo anymore; now he donned a simple white shirt and blue striped pants. He was seated at a stool in the middle of the pumpkin patch with an easel in front of him, hard at work on a painting. You would have gasped if you still had breath, and your body moved before you completely comprehended what you were seeing.

Wally.

As you came closer, you could see that he was recreating the view of the spiral hill on his painting. His back was to you, and he hummed quietly as he worked, so deep in thought that he didn't notice you and Jack approaching until Jack called his name.

“Wally! I thought we'd find you here.” Jack leaned over Wally's shoulder and looked at the painting. “Ah, is this my commission? It's coming along swimmingly.”

All you saw was Wally's side profile as he smiled up at Jack. “Thank you. I'm just touching up a few details, right now. It should be finished in a day or so, when it dries.”

“It will be a wonderful anniversary gift. Sally will love it!”

Wally turned back to his painting, and Jack glanced at you like he'd just remembered you were there. “Actually, Wally, I needed to speak to you.”

“Hm?”

“It seems,” Jack said, putting his hand on Wally's shoulder, “that someone is here to see you.”

Wally gave Jack a confused look, then turned.

His eyes widened, and the paintbrush fell from his limp fingers.

Neither of you moved. His eyes trailed up and down your body. He stood, took a few hesitant steps forward, and said, “Y/N?”

You smiled. “Hello, Wally,” you said.

Jack was beaming.

Wally blinked, then shook his head. “I'm dreaming.”

You almost laughed. Your hands were shaking. “No, you're not.”

“I am. You... you can't be here. It's not possible.”

“Wally...”

“I'm going to open my eyes, and you'll be gone.”

You approached him, took his hand, and pressed it against your face. His eyes dilated and his mouth fell open.

“I'm here,” you whispered.

He studied your face, and his fingers trailed down your jaw and to your neck, where they found the stitches. He glanced at them, and his mouth opened wider. “Oh...” His other hand found your neck and he gently traced the stitches. He gently turned your head from side to side as he looked you over like he was just noticing the bluish tint your skin had taken, and his gaze fell on the stitches on your temple. “What happened?”

“A carriage accident.”

He covered his mouth. “Oh, no...”

You took his hand again. “It's alright. I don't remember anything.”

You noticed tears forming at the corners of his eyes. “I'm so sorry.”

You cupped his cheek. “Don't be. I'm alright.”

Jack coughed. “I believe you two will be wanting some time alone?” He leaned down and whispered to Wally, “I recommend the top of Spiral Hill. Very romantic spot.” He winked, and Wally started to blush.

“Thank you,” he mumbled before he gripped your hand tightly and led you toward Spiral Hill. You trudged to the top together, hand in hand, and you looked out over the view of the graveyard and pumpkin patch, grey and black with dots of orange.

Wally turned to you and took a tight hold of both your hands. “Tell me everything.”

You didn't speak, because with him holding your hands I noticed something for the first time. When you had met before, when you were still alive, whenever he touched you his skin was always freezing cold. Now it wasn't. You realized it was because we were the same temperature. It made you want to hold him closer.

“I already told you, I was in a carriage accident.”

“No, no. I mean... tell me about your life. What happened after I left?”

“You want me to tell you all of that? Right now?”

He nodded. “We have all the time in the world, now.”

You grinned, and then you did just that. You told him about your marriage to Howdy, the relationship you had formed, the good and bad times, and you told him that during those seven years, you never forgot him. You were afraid that he would be upset or sad when you told him about your marriage, but he seemed to be the contrary.

“I'm glad,” he said. “I was hoping I was making the right decision. It's good to know that you lived a good life after I was gone, even if... even if it was a short one.”

He had looked away, and you gently cupped his cheek so that he would look at you. “The others in the Land of the Dead said that the reason I stayed behind was likely because I had unfinished business. At first, I didn't know what they were talking about, but I think I do, now.” Despite building up to that, you suddenly became bashful and couldn't quite find the words.

Wally touched your hand on his face and leaned into it. “You were looking for me?”

You nodded. “The thing is... I missed y—”

He interrupted you by pressing his lips to yours.

He had only ever kissed you once before, that night on the bridge. You weren't sure if that even counted since you fainted when he did. You remembered being terrified back then, your stomach swirling and your heart thumping so hard and fast you thought you were about to have a heart attack. You remembered how cold his lips were, and how dizzy you were from the fear.

This was different. Obviously, you weren't afraid, now, but it was more than that. It was rushed and passionate, not the formal seal of the vows that Wally had done before. And it was warm. You still felt dizzy, though.

When he pulled away, you stared into each other's eyes for a moment, then you took his shoulders and pulled him back to you for another kiss. Your hand went to the back of his head and your fingers tangled into his soft hair. His hands trailed up and down your back. You gripped each other as if the second one of you let go, you'd be lost forever. You finally pulled away again when you heard the sound of an applause in the distance.

At the top of one of the nearby hills, a small crowd of monsters and ghouls had formed, and they were whooping and cheering. Jack and Sally stood at the center of the crowd, smiling up at you as Sally leaned into Jack's shoulder.

“So much for alone time,” you muttered. You turned back to Wally to see him beaming up at you. His eyes sparkled.

He wrapped his arms around your waist and lifted you up into a twirl. You yelped in surprise and gripped his shoulders. He laughed heartily as he set you back down, then he leaned his forehead into yours, and for a moment you simply relished in each other's company.

“Thank you,” he said. “I've missed you, too. I know that I was selfish before, but I really am glad that you came to find me.”

You were surprised to feel your heart melting a bit when he said that—it seemed that even if your heart didn't beat anymore, it was still capable of swelling and melting with emotion.

The ring on your right hand glinted in the moonlight. A knot formed in your throat. “I think... I think I know what my unfinished business is, now.”

Wally tilted his head, curious.

You took the ring off your finger and held it up to him. “I want to try again. Properly, this time. Nothing in our way, and no interruptions. I want to give you the wedding you deserve.”

Wally's eyes widened a bit, then he chuckled and shook his head. “It was never just about the wedding, you know. I wanted true love. A happy ending.”

“Exactly,” you said. “I want to give you that. A big, beautiful ceremony to celebrate true love, and a real happily ever after.” You cleared your throat, suddenly nervous. “If you'd like that, I mean.”

He broke into a wide smile. “Are you asking me to marry you?”

You nodded. “Yes. Will you marry me? Again?”

He laughed again and pulled you into a hug. “Yes. If you will have me.”

You closed your eyes and leaned into the hug. “Of course I will.”

You finally pulled apart once again to slip the band on Wally's finger, right where it belonged.

A/N: Yes, I already know I'm cringe. Don't look at me.

#welcome home fanfic #corpse puppet au #wally darling x y/n #wally darling x reader #nightmare before christmas crossover #jack x sally

[scorpionrising]

there's an ache in you, put there by the ache in me (pt. 1: the road not taken looks real good now)

pairing: aemond targaryen x velaryon!oc word count: 8971 content warnings: explicit sexual content, major character death, cheating/infidelity (not really, but also kind of – it'll make sense when you read it), will add to this list as needed read part 2 here

notes: this is also cross-posted to ao3, as that is my primary place for posting, if you would prefer to read there. this author is fully team black, so proceed with caution. background relationships include cregan/jace/baela and luke/rhaena. feel free to read heavily into daena and rhaenyra's interactions too if you so choose

before reading, please be aware that this is an AU of a completed fanfiction i have written called fireplace ashes. you really don't need to have read it though to read this, as it's pretty self contained. all you need to know at the start:

daena velaryon is the youngest daughter of rhaenys targaryen and corlys velaryon; the same age as aegon. she claimed vermithor when she was eight and laenor was her favorite person in the world growing up, so she loves her nephews very much. she is betrothed to jace and neither of them are happy about it. when rhaenyra sent luke to storm's end, daena went with him. when he chased after luke, she stopped him, and this is where we leave off...

edit, 12/18/2023: because i forgot to mention this before posting — re: any references made to sarya. sarya is an oc from the fic i wrote that this is based on. she is daena’s handmaiden with whom daena has had a clandestine relationship that is so doomed by the narrative that they are both entirely aware of it

Daena and Aemond spoke more and more with each passing day. Mariyah was still sick, confined to her bed and face growing paler as the storms raged outside. Aemond had grown surprisingly competent in dealing with the barn animals, so she spent a majority of her days attending to Mariyah.

“Perhaps it was a miracle,” Mariyah said in a croaking voice as Daena wrung out a cloth to lay atop her forehead.

“What was?” Daena asked. 

“Stumbling upon you,” Mariyah said, closing her eyes as Daena laid the cloth down. “The gods knew.”

“What did they know?” 

“That I would die, and they ensured I would not die alone.” 

There was a faint smile on her deeply lined face, as though she were at peace. 

“Oh, don’t say that,” Daena said, taking care to smooth down Mariyah’s gray hair. 

“Ever since my Royce passed three years ago, I’ve been waiting for the gods to take me. We never had children, you know.” Mariyah’s muddy green eyes sprung open and she reached out a wrinkled hand to touch Daena’s face. Tears began brimming as she spoke once more. “I’ve been alone for so long. It’s been wonderful, having you and your husband here.” 

Daena partly hated herself for lying to Mariyah, but if it gave the old woman comfort in her last days to think she was providing aid to a happy couple in love, she would continue the charade until the moment the storms broke. 

“I’d like you and Jack to keep the house,” Mariyah whispered. “Let it be your shelter. Go to Essos if you wish, but let the house remain standing, I beg. Let it still be filled with love even once I’m gone.” 

Feeling tears in her own eyes begin to well, Daena nodded. If this was a way to settle her debt with Mariyah, she would declare this house as royal property. It would be a hunting getaway for her ancestors for years to come. It would never crumble as a way to pay thanks to the woman who saved her. 

“Of course,” Daena said finally. “We’ll take care of your home.”

“Make it your home,” Mariyah begged. “Make it yours.” 

“We will,” Daena promised. “We will.” 

Mariyah nodded, contended by Daena’s words, and her eyes fluttered close once more. Her chest stuttered, but then began to rise and fall in time. Pursing her lips, Daena pulled the covers up the Mariyah’s chin and removed the damp cloth from her forehead. She let the water pitcher rest on the bedside table and filled a glass with water in case Mariyah woke up thirsty. 

When she went down the stairs, Aemond was sitting by the fire in the main room of the house reading. The candles were dim, burnt down to the wicks around him. They would have to replace them on the morrow with the new ones. 

“What are you reading?” she asked him.

He glanced up from his book and pressed his lips together. “A book of Lysene poetry. The old woman is more learned than I thought.” 

“Her name is Mariyah,” Daena said, scowling and taking a seat in the chair across from him. She pointed her feet out and let the flames warm her bare ankles. “You ought to have some respect, you know.” 

He scoffed at her but did not look back down at his book. Instead, he met her eyes brazenly. Despite herself, she delighted in the way the flames licked at the sapphire embedded in his eye socket. The question was on the tip of her tongue, begging to be asked, but she could not find the words in actuality. 

“Our families think us dead,” Daena whispered instead, staring into the flames. 

“And whose fault is that?” he retorted. 

She flexed her fingers and clenched her jaw, wondering what it might be like to fling her fist into his jaw. 

“What if we stay dead?” she asked him.

“If you’d like me to kill you, just give the word,” he said through his teeth. 

“Not like that,” she snapped. “I just— Mariyah told me when she dies she wants us— or Alyse and Jack, rather— to keep the house… and I can’t help but wonder what it would be like to stay here and live a simple life.” 

“You wouldn’t like that,” Aemond said. He closed his book and set it aside on the floor by his feet. “It would bore you senseless.”

“You said the same thing about my marriage to Jace,” Daena pointed out. She flexed her feet and tilted her head back to stare at the dark ceiling. “It would seem I am destined for a life of dreadful boredom.” 

She sighed loudly and pushed her braids off her shoulder to fall over the back of the chair. Aemond’s eye was trained directly on her face, seeming to see through her to her very soul. 

“Would it not be better to be bored on my own terms, living my own life rather than forced into a loveless marriage?” 

“That would mean abandoning your family,” he pointed out, “which you would never do.”

She huffed and dropped her hands onto her lap. “You’re right. But it’s nice to pretend, I suppose.”

“What’s the point in pretending?” he asked her. “We are not children.” 

“You’re infuriating,” she snapped. “We’ve been stuck here for days on end with nothing to do, knowing our families are preparing for war! What’s the point of any of it? Why shouldn’t I imagine an easier life?” 

“Because it makes you a coward,” he told her as though it were the simplest thing in the world, voice too placid for her liking. “You cannot run from your destiny, Daena, no matter how hard you might try.”

“I’ve never run from my destiny,” she said defensively, remembering the way Helaena looked at her and whispered ‘Dragonslayer’ all those years ago.  

He hummed and turned to the flames, barring the sapphire in his eye from view. All she could see was the unmarred half of his face, and she could see the strange little boy in his bones. She had quite liked that boy, but she thought he might be long dead by now. 

“I hope they betrothed Jace to Baela in my absence,” she confessed in a small voice. “She could love him in a manner I could never bear to, I think.” 

He slid his feet forward. The house shoes Mariyah had provided for him were neatly placed at one of the chair legs, but he wore thick woolen socks all the same. The heal of one of the socks was fraying and the other was drooping so low that she could see his bony ankle poking out from beneath the pants that were too short for him. It made him look disgustingly human. 

“Which Baratheon girl were you going to marry?” 

“I do not know,” he said. “Whichever one I found the most tolerable, I suppose.”

“How romantic.” She smirked a bit to herself and adjusted her weight in the seat for a more comfortable position. “I envy the smallfolk in this. They are allowed to fall in love before they marry. We must make an attempt at love only after the wedding, if at all.”

“I’d take a castle and not having to cook my own meals and slaughter my own animals over love any day,” Aemond said. 

She frowned, pitying him not for the first time and likely not for the last. 

“That’s terribly sad, Aemond.”

When he did not respond, she sighed and stood up. 

“I will be going to bed now, I think…” She made her way across the room and faltered, turning back to look at him. He was staring into the empty seat. “Goodnight, Aemond.” 

He turned. “Goodnight, Daena.”

With a strange, heavy feeling in her chest, she settled into the bed she made for herself on the floor and laid her head down. Tonight, sleep would not come, no matter how strongly she yearned for it. She tossed and turned, trying to find an acceptable position. Sometime later, Aemond entered and blew out the candles. She listened to him shuffle around and settle down. Once he laid down, he was still. She heard his breaths turn deep as sleep took him over. Irritated by that, she groaned into her pillow and flipped to attempt to sleep on her back. 

“Just come up here.”

Her eyes sprung open despite the total darkness. She had thought him fast asleep by now. 

“What?” she asked. “Don’t be absurd, Aemond. That would be—”

“I do believe we are far past what is and is not proper at this point,” he told her. “The bed is plenty large enough for two.”

She thought of what her mother and father might say, of what Sarya would believe, of what Jace and Luke might think of her. To share a bed with the enemy was bordering on treason, but was Aemond truly an enemy? Not to her, she thought a bit shamefully. 

“You are just saying that to lure me in with false pretenses so that you might sully my name and reputation later on,” she accused, though she knew it was rather halfhearted. 

“Gods be good,” he grunted. “Daena, just come up here and sleep.”

“Fine,” she muttered, hating herself for being so weak. 

It was merely because her back was beginning to ache all through the day from sleeping on the floor for the last two weeks. That was all. Nothing more. 

Pillows in hand, she climbed up and made herself comfortable on the bed. She was deeply conscious of Aemond laying stock still beside her, pale skin exposed. Heat from his body radiated towards her and she was mindful not to curl into it, instead turning her back to him and squeezing her eyes shut. She prayed for the storms to end early and for Vermithor to finish healing soon to take her away from this place.

Forgetting she had not gone to sleep on the floor, she was confused when she woke up to warmth and soft cushions and a weight thrown across her middle. She opened her eyes to find Aemond’s head tucked into her shoulder, hand splayed over her stomach. Instantly, she stiffened. This was an intimacy she had only known with Sarya. A traitorous part of herself was glad for it, having missed the feeling of falling asleep wrapped up in another. She quickly murdered that thought and turned onto her side to attempt to slip out of Aemond’s grip. Thankfully, he was a deep sleeper and did not awaken from her efforts. If it were up to her, he would never learn of this.  

Mariyah passed four days later in her sleep, and Daena found that her heart was broken. Mariyah, who had been so deeply kind and had taken in two strangers without a thought, was dead and the world was worse off for it. 

“We have to bury her,” she insisted. 

“Look outside,” Aemond said, gesturing to the raging rain and wind. “You want to dig a grave?” 

“It’s either that or we let her rot in here,” Daena argued. “Don’t be so cold hearted, Aemond.”

“Fine,” Aemond hissed. “You can dig the grave yourself. I want no part in it.” 

And so she did. Wrapped in the cloak Mariyah wore the night she took them in, Daena marched outside with a shovel and began digging. The grave was shallow, but it would have to do. With all the rain, wind, and mud splattering up onto her face, it was nearly impossible to see what she was doing. Lightning cracked through the sky and a branch snapped off the tree just to her left. 

When she turned to go back to the house, Aemond was already walking out with Mariyah’s body wrapped neatly in one of the blankets from her bed. Clearly, he had changed his mind. She was sure she was crying, but she was thankful to the rain for obscuring it from Aemond. Her throat closed as he gently laid Mariyah into the grave she dug. She had never seen him capable of such gentleness before.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

If he heard her, he offered no response. Instead, he took the shovel from her hands and began to cover Mariyah’s body. He moved quickly and methodically and did not even spare her a glance. With every day they spent together, she realized that she understood very little about the prince. He kept his motivations so close to his chest that she was constantly, utterly befuddled by him. Once he was done covering the grave, he stood at Daena’s side—as though waiting for her to move. 

“I wrote to you,” she heard herself say, voice hushed in confession. “After that day on the rocky island, I wrote to you.”

“Yes,” he said.

Something within her shattered. She had hoped ceaselessly that the raven had been lost, or that someone else had gotten the letter and kept it from him. That day on the rocky island with him had been one of the best she ever had since Laena’s death, and now they would never ride dragons together again. Her eyes burned. 

“Why did you never write back?”

“It seemed pointless,” he said, very pointedly not looking at her. 

“I must confess,” she said, “I do not understand your reasoning.” 

He flexed his hand, splaying his fingers out. He rounded on her, shoulders set back. The cloak’s hood was low on his forehead, but she could see the deep indigo of his eye clear as day. There was confliction written in his iris, and then determination as a muscle in his jaw ticked. 

“Three years ago,” he said, voice hard and cold as sharp steel, “I had intended to ask for your hand.” 

It should not have surprised her, with everyone around her back then telling her that he was attempting to court her, and yet it did. The dragon brooch he had gifted her was proof enough of that, but she still had been so blind to it. She had thought it a friendship, and him no more than a boy with a crush. She had no idea that his feelings had ran so deep. 

“After that day on the island, I went to my mother and told her my plans. She forbade it and told me I was not to see you again, on account of your allegiances.” 

“Oh,” she whispered. “Aemond, I—”

“It matters not,” he said. 

“Of course it matters,” she said.

A great gust of wind hit her directly in the face and blew the hood of her cloak off, but she made no move to fix it or run for shelter. This seemed too important. 

“No,” he snapped, “it does not. Why bother fixating on the past and things that will never be?” 

“Tell me something, then,” she said, pushing her shoulders back. “That stone in your eye. Is it not the sapphire I gave you?” 

“It serves as a reminder.” 

“What could it possibly remind you of?”

He stepped closer to her. “The things I will never have.” 

“Why would you want constant reminders of that?” she asked him. 

“Because so long as I am reminded of what I cannot have, I will not be so foolish as to think of what could have been.” 

Again, she found him terribly sad. Hesitantly, she reached out and touched his arm. 

“You must allow yourself to want things,” she insisted. “Constant restraint is no way to live. Take what you want, Aemond, and let yourself feel.”

Unable to bear it any longer, she backed away from him and reentered the house. She ripped the cloak off and left it to rot on the floor. She was covered in mud and soaked to the bone. It was terrible, disgusting, infuriating. She was not entirely sure what it was, but it was just as likely to be the muddy clothes as it was Aemond’s attitude. She could not fathom how he could possibly be so cold about matters that deserved only warmth. He was sharp, cutting and slicing with his words, as he spoke about wanting to marry her. In this moment, she would have liked nothing more than to skewer him. 

Pulling at the strings on her dress, she began the process of disrobing for a bath. She wanted to be rid of him. She wanted to be clean. 

She relaxed in the tub until her fingers shriveled and the water turned cold. She dunked her head one last time and stood to leave, but then realized the flaw in her plan. In her haste to take a bath, she had neglected to collect a towel to dry off with or fresh clothes. 

“Shit,” she muttered, knowing she would have no choice but to call for Aemond’s aid. 

Surely, he would never let her forget this. Especially not after what he just admitted to her. Would he think she was trying to seduce him? Grimacing to herself, she drew her knees to her chest and called his name until she heard his footsteps approach the door. 

“What is it?” he asked, sounding just as irritated as she had expected. 

“I—” It was already humiliating. “Could you please bring me a towel and chemise? I forgot.” 

He made a noise that could have been mistaken for a snort behind the door. Without voicing his assent or denial, he walked away. Gnawing on the inside of her cheek and absentmindedly scratching at her clavicle, Daena debated her options. She glanced a bit disparagingly at her discarded gown from before. She could put that back on, but the thought of it was entirely unappealing. 

Then, without warning, the door flew open. Jolting in surprise, Daena quickly drew her knees even closer to her chest to attempt to save her from even more indignity. 

“Here.” He held out a bundle of fabrics. “Where do you want them?” 

“Um, just… The floor is fine. Thank you.”

He nodded and she watched as his eye flickered from her face to the harsh scar on her shoulder, visible no doubt from the manner in which she was hunched over to prevent him from seeing her more intimate areas. Having let him see the scar, now, she perhaps would have rathered him see the other parts of her. Somehow, the scar felt leagues more intimate than her breasts. 

“It happened in the Stepstones,” she said, unsure why she kept him in here. 

She really ought to have sent him away, and perhaps in every other life she did. But, in this one, she did not. 

Aemond’s cheeks darkened in a flush. 

“How?” he asked. 

His eye was trained so singularly on her face that she knew he was making a concerted effort not to look elsewhere. 

“I was fighting on the ground,” Daena explained. “Turned my back on an opponent I thought was dead.” 

Could he hear the undercutting questions in her words? Can I turn my back to you, Aemond? Can I trust you? Once, she might have said yes easily.  

“I hope you gave the craven the death he deserved,” Aemond said, nodding sharply. “There is no honor in that.”

She looked at him, and he her. Slowly, she felt the barest of smiles tug at her lips. Each and every day, he surprised her. Whether it was good or bad, she did not know, and she suspected she would not know until it was far too late. 

Without another word, he left the room. Left alone, she dressed herself slowly. 

Three years ago, I intended to ask for your hand. If he had done it, she would not have wanted it—and yet, she could not help but think about how different things would be if he had. Would things be better? Perhaps so; she could have bridged the gap between Luke and Aemond. That alone would have certainly changed a great many things.  

Perhaps the time on the island had driven her mad, but she felt her bare feet pad along the floor until she found Aemond in the bedroom. Again, he looked achingly human. His bony ankles were visible beneath of cuff of his breeches, and his soft tunic was bunched up at the elbows. She stood in the doorway, merely watching. If he was aware of her presence, he gave no indication, and even if he was; he was surely unaware of how entranced she was by the way his hair fell in silken sheets around his shoulders. He was as severe as he was beautiful.

“Answer me this,” she said, breaking the silence.

His shoulders drew taut as he slowly turned to face her. 

“What makes you believe you could never have me?” 

He scoffed. “Our families are at war. Even before, it would have never been possible.” 

She would have agreed to it, had the matter been raised. Seeing him in such mundanity, tending to animals and reading under the low light of the candles, made it impossible to hate him. He was no enemy. He was merely a man led astray, but his heart was good and his soul nowhere near as black as he would like her to believe. 

“Do not think of our families,” Daena said. “Think only of yourself and how you feel. That is how you take care of yourself. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to go to bed.” 

Fingers curling into the material of the chemise at her thighs, Daena pushed past him and began to pull at the bed covers. Whatever she had been thinking before, it was a spark of delusion and madness. Clearly he could not see past his inflated sense of self, and he never would. And she was merely entertaining it because she was bored. Grimacing, she fluffed violently at her pillow. 

His long and slender fingers wrapped around the crook of her elbow, and he pulled her towards him without any sense of warning. She was not proud of the gasp she let out in response; sharp and high-pitched. The sapphire embedded in his eye socket—the sapphire she had given him—glinted in the candlelight. He was so close. 

“Could I have had you?” he asked, voice low and rushed. 

“I would not have minded if you asked,” she answered. 

Aemond’s grip on her tightened, and if he clenched any harder she was sure bruises would begin to take form. She considered, briefly, smacking him away, but she did not mind the weight of his grip in all truth. She and Sarya often gripped one another in far greater passions. Besides, she liked seeing Aemond unfurled. 

“I have always known what you are, Aemond,” Daena whispered. 

“And what am I, my lady?” 

“A strange boy with a crush,” she said, tilting her head back. “But I have always been more than fond of strange things.” 

She really ought to have expected it after goading him, but his kiss shocked her all the same. His lips landed on the corner of her mouth, sideways down her chin, as though he were unused to the act. Adjusting, she tilted her head to the side to turn the kiss into a proper one. His hands, clutching her hips in a vice, burned at her skin through her chemise. Enthralled by the feeling, she curled her fingers around the sides of his neck, bringing one hand up into the roots of his hair. 

However inexperienced he was, he made up for it in enthusiasm. Aemond grasped at her, trailing all across her body as though he were attempting to create a map of her bones. She pushed up onto her toes, tightening her grip on his hair, and gnashed her teeth into his mouth. She took his bottom lip between her teeth and bit down just beyond gently. When his mouth fell open, she slipped her tongue against the roof of his mouth. His hips jolted against hers as a sharp gasp tumbled from his lips. 

“Are you going to take me or not?” she mumbled against his neck.

“Please,” he gasped out as she scraped her teeth against his skin. 

“Do you want me, Aemond?”

“Yes.”

“Tell me,” she whispered, tugging on his hair. “How do you want me?” 

He groaned, low and guttural; rigid against her. His grip only tightened. 

“I want—” His head fell forward, atop hers. “I want to taste you.”

Daena pulled away from Aemond, a wicked grin spreading across her full and swollen lips. Holding eye contact, she stepped backwards until she was sat upon the edge of the bed. Then, with Aemond’s attention captured entirely, she spread her legs and pulled the hem of her chemise up slowly, tantalizingly. 

“Get on your knees, then,” she said.

Aemond fell without a blink. His fingertips traced along her ankles and then slowly crept up her leg, flexing his entire palm against her skin once he reached her thighs. She could feel his breath against her, his mouth open but still so terribly far from latching onto her as she wanted him to. 

“My prince,” she groaned, reaching for the top of his head. “Please.” 

He complied, pressing his tongue flat to her. There was no hesitation in his actions; he licked with confidence and precision, shocking her because she struggled to imagine him experienced. He groaned against her, hooking his arms beneath her thighs and pulling her as close to his face as possible. She was unable to keep the shrill moan from escaping her throat. 

“Aemond,” she gasped. It was a breathy sort of thing, pulled in a wisp from her lungs. “Use… fingers!” 

Ever the apt listener, he dipped a single finger into her. The moan she let out then was a pitched and trilling squeal. His single finger was the size of two of Sarya’s and reached to far deeper places than Sarya’s petite hands had been able to reach. He pumped the finger in and out, slowly and surely, and grinned against her. Two more fingers then, shoved inside her at once. She collapsed backwards onto the bed with a loud moan. He was relentless in his ministrations, going at a rapid pace until she was writhing and squirming and gasping for air. Swiping her arm over her forehead, she pushed herself up to look down at him. 

His face was covered in her, glistening in the flickering, dying light. She swiped her tongue across her bottom lip. She grabbed a fistful of his tunic and yanked at it to get it off him. Catching on, he moved to help her. There was a heavy silence between them, but he moved onto the bed—hovering over her—without her even needing to tell him what she wanted. 

She stared up at him, lips parted ever so slightly. His hair hung down in a silky curtain, framing his face. Palms shaking, she reached up and pressed her hand to his face. She arched her neck up and brushed her lips softly, gently, tenderly over his scarred forehead. The sapphire buried within his eye socket seemed to glow, keeping her attention rapt. Her thumb trailed along the underside of his eye, brushing against his long lower lashes. He was silent in her arms, stoic above her. 

Afraid to speak, lest she say something too intimate, too weak, too revealing, she pulled his face down and licked herself from his lips. His teeth gnashed against her lip as though he wanted to swallow her whole. Briefly, as she fumbled with the buttons on his breeches, she thought she might let him. They did not speak, not even as she pushed him up against the headboard and sat herself on his lap. He was hard against her inner thigh, but she ignored it for the time being. Instead, she tugged his mouth down to her neck. He licked, bit, and sucked at the flesh, drawing heavy gasps for air from her lungs. 

Chemise sticking to her with sweat, Daena pushed him back to begin ripping at the strings to get it off her. Aemond picked up on it and yanked the shift roughly over her head. His eye flickered down to her heaving breasts and a spike of confidence shot through her when she noticed how his cheeks flushed a darker shade at the sight. 

“Daena,” he gasped out, voice heady and broken. “I… want—” 

“I’ll give you whatever you want,” she promised, moving her hands to cradle his face. 

Pulling him in for another angry kiss, she shifted her hips so that she could sink herself down onto him. It was a sensation she had never felt before, reaching places she had never known existed. Tears she did not quite understand burned in her eyes, but she continued to sink down until there was nowhere else for her to go. A groan that sounded more animal than human burst from her as she collapsed against his chest. His hands were hot as coals against her thighs, fingers sure to leave burnt impressions. 

Delirious, she dropped her forehead against his and began to move her hips in slow, rocking circles. He swore quietly, tightening his grip on her legs. 

“Seven… hells,” he grunted.  

She continued until she found a pace that cut her breath off at the base of her throat, where the tip of him hit a place deep within her that caused her vision to go black and her jaw to go slack. 

“Aemond.” She exhaled his name, unable to think of anything else but the man beneath her. She wanted to burrow herself within him and find a home within his bones, tucked into his ribs. Every bit of him had invaded her, and she was loath to let it end. This bubble they had created; she wanted it to exist for as long as she could sustain it. Here, they were leagues away from the people they had been and the circumstances that brought them to this island. Here, they were just Alyse and Jack. Here, they were free. 

She let him spill within her after she reached her peak, and then collapsed once more against him. It was easy to fall asleep, exhausted and spent, within his arms. 

Daena awoke with the first light of morning, as she always did. Naked and sticky with the dried sweat of the night before, she and Aemond were still tangled together; his face pressed into the crook of her neck. She was flooded with a wretched sort of feeling, unable to bear being within his grasp. As gently as she could, she removed herself from his arms and reached down to the floor for her chemise. She dressed quickly and sprinted away from the room. 

Unsure if it was more shame or guilt that was flooding through her, she tucked herself into one of the armchairs by the unlit fire and stared into the blackened hearth. If she ever got away from here—if they ever got away from here—how could she possibly hope to look her family in the eye? How could she face Luke, knowing she had sworn to give the uncle who tormented him anything he wanted whilst in the thralls of passion. 

A mistake, she decided. That is all it was. A mistake driven from flaring tempers and boredom. That was all it could be; nothing more. 

Even so, she could not help but wish in the deepest and darkest depths of her soul for the opportunity to make the mistake again. 

A noise from the bedroom informed her that Aemond had woken up. When he came into the main room of the house, their eyes met. After perhaps a moment too long, he tore his gaze away from hers and grabbed an apple from the bowl on the table and stalked back into the bedroom with that infuriating slow strut of his. 

They did not speak that day, nor the next. Daena resigned herself to sleeping curled up in the armchair, drawing idly on loose slips of parchment she found around the house until she fell asleep. She mourned the tenuous friendship they had begun to restore in the days past as she did her best to ignore the growing knot in her neck from sleeping in the chair. It truly felt as though they were destined to be on opposing sides, never to truly know each other. She wished he never told her he wanted to marry her. Now, her mind was consumed by thoughts of what could have been and what could still be. It was also how she knew him a liar; if he did not dwell on the past, then he would have forgotten the matter entirely. But he had not, and so she knew he did care. 

She would have agreed, she thought to herself as she drew Vermithor’s scales. If he had asked her, she would have married him. It was a terrifying, fleeting thought— and perhaps it was a betrayal of Luke, of Sarya, and, now, of Jace. Still, she could not deny that she liked Aemond well enough. She had been fond of him even when they were children and he smashed her head with a rock. She enjoyed his presence, despite his generally unpleasant demeanor. He was a friend, and she would have liked to marry a friend. She could have been happy in a marriage of friendship. If he had been allowed, she would have accepted. 

But perhaps he was correct, and there was no use on dwelling on these things. What did it lead to but unhappiness?

She was curled up in a chair by the fire while Aemond tended to the barn animals, proving once more that he cared far more deeply for things than he liked to pretend. She flipped the page of the parchment back to the portrait she had drawn of Aemond while he slept. In the sketched plains of his face, she could see the strange and innocent boy beneath the cruel man. Pursing her lips, she tore the page and crumpled it. Just as he said, no use in dwelling on things she could not change. 

He entered in with a wet gust of wind behind him. He made a grumbling noise as he kicked off his boots and undid the cloak, which really only served to make her laugh. He glared in her direction and stalked off, likely to wash up from being in the barn. Heaving a great sigh, Daena got out of the chair to scrounge together a meal for them. They ate like the smallfolk in Flea Bottom, and Daena was miserable for it. Their lack of communication made the bland food all the worse. 

She brought the pot of stew to the hearth and let it come to a boil. Mariyah, in all her elderly wisdom, had planned on a long hurricane season and had gathered enough produce to last them the entirety of it. Aemond emerged from the washroom just as she was removing the pot from the fire. She offered him a tight smile and averted her eyes to began spooning stew into bowls for them to eat. 

They sat silently on opposite sides of the table, pointedly not looking at each other. It made her want to scream and cry and rip her hair from its roots and throw the bowl at him. It was suffocating, and she just wanted to be done with it.

It was he, who broke their days-long silence, pushing his bowl away from him and leaning back against the chair. “I apologize,” he said stiffly, “for taking advantage the other night. It was… unworthy of me.”

Daena stared at him blankly, astounded. Then, a laugh that could be classified as nothing other than a cackle burst from her lips. His lips pursed at the sound, clearly displeased by her reaction. 

“That is what you apologize for?” she asked, gasping for breath between words. “Oh, Aemond… I am hardly a blushing maiden.”

At that, a flush crept up his cheeks. 

“The other night might have been a moment of weakness that can and will never happen again, but you did not take advantage.” 

“Well, I apologize nonetheless.” His cheeks were flushed with blood. “And, yes. Never again.” 

She bit the inside of her cheeks as her mind cycled through all the motions of their mistake. As far as mistakes go, it had been her most enjoyable one. 

“You ought to sleep in the bed again,” Aemond said after another long silence as they cleaned up the kitchen. “I can tell your neck is bothering you.” 

Her hand flew to the crook of her neck on instinct. She ripped it away just as quickly. 

“I’m quite fine.”

“Then allow me to take the chair or floor.”

“No, that is not necessary,” she insisted, turning away from him to stare out the window. The rain beat mercilessly on the glass. Like it was trying to bring not just the home, but the entire island down. “You sustained more injuries than I did in the fall, and the fault for that lies in my hands.” 

She chose to leave out the fact that it was his actions that forced her hand, because at this point that was neither here nor there. 

“Then perhaps I sleep in the other room—”

“Mariyah just died on that bed!” Daena exclaimed, half scandalized. She was tired of this conversation. “We will continue as we have.” 

“Daena, you cannot—”

“And yet, I will!” she shrieked. Instantly embarrassed, she sucked in a long, slow breath and turned back around to face him. “It is different for me.” 

He said nothing, merely staring at her. Gods, how he infuriated her, how he wiggled beneath her skin and stuck there, how he could see right through her. 

“If anyone were to discover we were here alone, you would be perfectly fine. I would be…” She thought back to what he hissed at her when he woke. “Ruined.” 

He opened his mouth to speak, but she pushed on. 

“Our mistake, for you, is a story to tell someday. For me, it is nothing less than betrayal.” 

“Betrayal.” He scoffed, a sudden glint of venom in his iris. “And what do you call my part, then? Do I not betray my family every moment you remain breathing?” 

“Kill me, then, and be done with it!” Daena threw her hands up. “Please, I beg you. Do it, because I will never be able to kill you as I know I ought to.” 

He blinked at her, stunned into silence by her manic plea. Frustrated tears brimming in her eyes, Daena stomped away from him and into the washroom. She sank to her knees and remained there until she heard no sounds of movement. Praying that it meant Aemond was asleep, Daena crept out and back into the main room. 

She was stopped in her tracks, however, by the sight of Aemond fast asleep on the very armchair she had made her bed the last few nights. One leg was propped up on the cushioned footrest while the other was sprawled onto the floor. Even in her hatred of him— if she could call it that— she was touched by the display. There was hope for him yet, goodness that bubbled beneath the surface. In an effort to repay the kindness, she grabbed a quilt from the chest by the fireplace and laid it over his lap. 

They had perhaps left things worse than they ever were before between them, but Daena would deal with those consequences once morning came. Now, she was bone weary and just wanted to sleep. She slept like the dead once her head hit the pillows, though in her dreams Aemond’s face taunted her. In the morning, she woke with a deep, aching need between her legs. Disgusted with herself, Daena kept herself confined within the walls of the bedchamber until she thought she might collapse from hunger. When she pulled the door open, however, she found herself face-to-face with Aemond—a plate of food and mug of mead in hand. His mouth fell open just a bit as she tripped herself to avoid walking right into him. 

“You have not eaten,” he said in a hoarse voice. “It is getting late… I thought you might like some food.”

“Thank you,” she said, unable to do much anything else than focus on his lavender iris boring into her. “How very thoughtful, my prince.” 

“Aemond,” he said suddenly. “Just— Call me Aemond.”

Oh. 

“Very well,” she said. “Aemond.” 

“I wanted to thank you… for the blanket last night.” He shuffled closer infinitesimally. The mug was shaking ever so slightly in his clenched fist. “And, I was thinking… here, we can just be…” 

She pulled the plate and mug from his hands and dropped them onto the small table in the room, discarded to be forgotten. Sighing, she pushed her braids over her shoulder and turned back to him. Did she haunt his dreams as he did hers? 

“We can just be… what, Aemond?” 

“I—” He opened his mouth and closed it thrice. “You said to take what I want.” 

A whirling thrill spiked in her blood, the ache inside of her leading her straight to him.  

“A mistake it might be, but what does it matter?” he asked. “We are alone.”

“I suppose it doesn’t,” she admitted. 

Taking him to her bed once, twice, or however many times mattered not so long as it ceased once they returned to where they belonged. She just liked to see him finally breaking free of that hardened shell he encased himself in. He kissed her, then, and she forgot all about her hunger for food. All she hungered for was him. His fingers yanked at the curls at the base of her skull, forcing her head back so that he could kiss down her jaw and neck. 

There were no words shared between them. Perhaps that would be too personal, too indicative of their wrongdoing. Neither took the time to undress, merely hiking up her chemise and shoving down his breeches.  They fell backwards onto the bed just as he pushed himself inside her. She gasped into his mouth, digging her nails into his cheekbones and looping her legs around his waist to pull him close. 

They continued at that pace until they were fully spent; collapsed upon one another. Daena yawned loudly, reaching her hand out to grab hold of the apple Aemond put on the plate for her. The generosity of it did not escape her; those apples seemed to be the only thing that made him even a shade of content. She took several bites of it before offering it out to Aemond. As though it were a natural sort of thing to do. And he took a bite from her hand, half convincing her this were a dream. When the apple was nothing but a discarded core and the bread nothing but crumbs, it was Daena who pounced on Aemond. Now that she had been given a taste, she was insatiable. And it seemed, so was he. 

But, it was more languid this time. He did not hurry himself as he mouthed at her neck and began to pull at the strings on her chemise. She wanted to touch him, but quickly lost all means to do so when he pulled her chemise off and began to kiss down her torso. Her breath hitched at the base of her throat and delirium flooded her veins as she became enthralled in the pleasure she wrought from him. 

“Seven Hells,” she groaned out, tossing her head back against the pillows. 

She could feel Aemond’s lips curl upwards into a smile as he traced his tongue along her hip bone in response. 

Much later, when they had tired themselves out entirely, he laid himself down beside her, resting his head on her bare chest. It was strange, how easy it was to simply be with him— and it terrified her as much as it befuddled her. But, then, it had always been easy with Aemond. They fell asleep like that, tangled together, pressed closer than close. Daena had never slept better in her life. 

“I would never ruin you,” he spoke quietly against her collarbone one night some weeks later. She had long since stopped keeping track of the days as they passed, dreary and thunderous as they were. 

Daena stilled beneath him. “What?” 

“Your reputation,” he said, “I would never allow it to fall to ruin.” 

For some reason, she believed him and kissed him hard on the mouth for the first time outside the thralls of passion. He returned the kiss with vigor and they fell asleep in the middle of it, which she had also never done before. 

When morning came, she awoke to a thunderous roar outside her window. Gasping, she shot up and looked around, scrambling to pull her chemise over her head. She knew that roar. Barefoot and without any protection from the weather, she sprinted outside, past Aemond who was slowly blinking his eyes and sitting up from the commotion she caused. Toes digging into the mud, Daena ran from the house to Vermithor. 

His bronze scales were like the rays of the sun amidst all the rain. Grinning, she flung herself forward. 

“My brave boy,” she wept, pressing her forehead to his snout. 

He snuffed and knocked his snout against her head. Laughing, she kissed one of his horns and stepped back to examine him. 

“How is your wing, hm?” she asked, walking around to take in his form.

He flared his wings out as though to prove he was in perfect condition. She reached her hand out to stroke the wing that had been injured when they took down Vhagar. She could see the scar tissue, but the tendons were healed and strong. She could go home. As though sensing her realization, he tilted his head back, opened his jaws wide, and screeched so loud that the trees shook. His hind legs stomped the ground, as though he were preparing for takeoff. It was everything she wanted to hear. 

“What are you doing?” Aemond shouted, standing in the threshold of the doorway.

Vermithor’s neck snaked around and he positioned himself firmly between Daena and Aemond. He remembered Aemond from the attack, and he did not trust the prince. Laughing at her dragon’s protection, she stepped forward and placed her hand on the underside of Vermithor’s jaw. He grumbled quietly and settled. 

“Umbagon,” she ordered before walking back to the house.

Aemond was staring at her like he found her mad. At least that had not changed. She pushed her wet braids from her face. 

“Vermithor is healed,” she said. 

“I can see that,” he said. He held out a large blanket for her. “Come inside.” 

Feeling the chill suddenly, she stepped in and allowed him to pull the blanket over her shoulders. His hands stayed on her shoulders, rubbing over her upper arms to help warm her. She furrowed her eyebrows and stared up at him. His face was pulled taut and there was concern evident, his lips pursed as he took care to help her dry off.  

“What?” he asked, seeing that she was staring.

She cleared her throat and averted her gaze. “It’s nothing.” She smiled to herself and tilted her head to the side. “Well, it is nice to see you care.” 

He frowned. “When have I ever given you the impression I do not care for you?” 

That response took her by surprise. It was shockingly earnest, coming from him— but that had been a running theme with him in the last few days. 

“Aemond,” she whispered, lifting a hand to his scarred cheek. 

It was absurd and utterly mad of her, but a sudden shot struck her like lightning. It would be so very easy to love him. Her love for Sarya had not lessened in her time on the island, but there was merely more space in her heart than she once thought. She would never be able to pursue it, of course. She was betrothed and he… Aemond was a traitor and an attempted kinslayer. And all that to say, she still wanted him. Something sinister had overtaken her in the last three moons, sunken its claws into her skin and dripped its poison onto her tongue. 

She was fond of him, desired him, enjoyed him, but she had a duty now that Vermithor was in flying condition. Aemond was a traitor and an attempted kinslayer, and she needed to bring him to justice. 

“I will come quietly,” he said softly, reaching out and gingerly curling the loose end of one of her braids around his finger. She had a keen memory of her own fingers wrapped in his hair. “I will surrender and bend the knee if that is what you wish.” 

“What I wish?” she echoed. “And what of your wishes?” 

It was as though the island emboldened him, pulled apart his strong defenses and left him bare but more confident than she had ever seen him. 

“I wish for whatever will keep me in your life, my lady.” 

“You can’t mean that,” she whispered, hardly daring to believe it.

She was not immune to the effects of dashing confessions made, easily swept up in the romance of it all. It was her most foolish trait, but being aware of it did not subdue it. It only made her aware of the breadth of stupidity she was capable of. 

“You took my eye. You took my dragon. Take my heart as well; it is yours.” 

Her cheeks burned under the weight of his gaze and words. Mouth dry, she crafted the most intelligent response she could muster. 

“I did not take your eye.”

He shrugged, as though his reasoning were the only sort that made sense. Perhaps he would have preferred it to have been her. Their injuries were settled like scores, canceling the other out— even if he had gotten off far worse than she had. In his mind, it should have been her, and so it was it seemed. Or that he held her in just as much blame as he did Luke. 

“And as for Vhagar—” Her own voice betrayed her, choking off in an unbecoming squeal. “I wish I could have stopped you without killing her.” 

Aemond looked away from her then, finally pulling his face from her palm. She tucked her hand back under the blanket he provided her as quickly as she could so as though it were never there in the first place. Then, he surprised her yet again. 

“I know.” It was a simple thing. “I forgave you a long time ago.” 

She furrowed her brow, a million and one questions racing about her mind, but she kept them to herself. 

“You will come without fight or argument?” she asked slowly.

“I will,” he confirmed. 

Bewildered and pleased alike, Daena observed him for a moment before ultimately deciding he seemed honest.

“Then we must dress. It is at least a half day’s flight from here to Dragonstone.” 

They did not speak again as they readied themselves for departure. What was there to say, really? They had, for better or worse, betrayed their families and themselves by falling into bed with one another, and now fate had come knocking. They both knew that on Dragonstone he would likely face imprisonment at best. There was always the threat of execution, but Daena was not sure Rhaenyra, even at her most bloodthirsty and vicious, had it in her to be a kinslayer. No, Rhaenyra would not take her brother’s head, but she might strip him of all titles and inheritance and send him to the Wall where he could never be a threat to her again. And rather stupidly, Daena did not wish for that. Perhaps this was what Aemond wanted all along; for her to trust him, to vouch for him, to be more than fond of him. 

That decided it for her. Upon arriving to Dragonstone, what happened here on the island would fade into the past. She would dedicate herself to whatever war effort there was and accept her fate as Queen after Rhaenyra. “Whatever claim to the throne I have left, you are it’s heir now. Both of you.” Daena would never be able to forget the sheen of sweat covering the older woman’s body, the way her face was scrunched up in pain and her voice quivered as she laid out commands for her oldest son and Daena. 

There was a truth about Daena Velaryon that Sarya had always seen: For her family, Daena would sacrifice anyone and anything, including herself, and let the entire world burn to ashes. And as Aemond perched himself behind her on Vermithor’s saddle without complaint, she wondered if he saw it too. An unstoppable force meets and immovable object, and whatever happens in the aftermath is only nature. And yet, Daena did not think she would go so quietly if the roles were reversed. 

“Sōves, Vermithor!” Daena yelled as loud as she could over the violent winds and rain, already soaked through to the bone. 

Without complaint or hesitance, Vermithor roared and took to the skies. 

Aemond and her did not speak for entire flight, and Daena was glad for the silence as the black sand beaches of Dragonstone grew ever nearer. It had been a year’s quarter since she left Dragonstone for Storm’s End, and war had been brewing when she did. There was no telling what they would find when they landed.

#aemond targaryen fic #aemond targaryen x ofc #aemond targaryen x reader #team black #hotd au #house of the dragon #hotd fanfic #aemond targaryen #rhaenyra targaryen #jacaerys velaryon #cregan stark #jace x cregan #jacegan #jacaela #fic: fireplace ashes

[acourtofladydeath]

Poly+ ACOTAR Week Day 1: Beginnings

All his life Nyx has been raised by his parents, Rhysand and Feyre, and their mate Tamlin. One day he decides to ask him mom how their bonds snapped and she is more than happy to oblige.

Inspired by the storytelling in "The Princess Bride" and "How I Met Your Mother" this is angsty, fluffy fun.

So excited to kick off the first day of @polyacotarweek with one of my favorite trios, Feytamsand. Start reading below, or read the entire fic on AO3 here!

“Mom!” I shouted through the hall of the River House. It was her day off, which probably meant she was painting. The River House had a state of the art studio for her to work in, but she typically painted wherever inspiration struck. Which means she could be anywhere. 

The house was entirely too large. Something I loved growing up when I wanted to hide, but hated when I needed to find them. Sure, we could mind speak, but once I walked in on my parents having daemati sex, something I literally didn't know existed before then. After that, I refused to communicate that way unless there was an emergency. 

“In here Nyxie!” She called back from the library at the end of the hall. It had a huge window overlooking the Sidra and sunset. Throughout the day light cast through the window, ricocheting through the room. As it traveled it glanced across the wide array of books, some gilded and some plain, painting the floor in its own way. With the kaleidoscope of colors and dancing light, it was one of mom’s favorite spots to paint. Aunt Nes spent most of her time here when she visited, but today it was just mom. 

“What’s up, baby?” Mom said as I walked in. Covered head to toe in paint, she turned to look at me and wiped even more on her apron and one of her mate’s old shirts. Now which one, I wasn’t quite sure. But judging by those giant, billowy sleeves and the gauzy white linen fabric I had a pretty good guess. 

“I’m not a baby anymore,” I scoffed from the doorway. There was no way I’d get any closer to her like this. Last time she hugged me while painting it took three baths to get it all off and my clothes had to be burned. 

“Nyx you are thirteen, you are definitely still my baby. Even a hundred years from now you’ll still be my baby. I’m your mother, that’s how it goes.” She smiled softly at me then, one of those smiles that told me she was thinking about the past and the future all at once. They were my favorites. 

“What did you need? Or did you just want to watch me paint?” My mom asked, slight worry in her eyes. I’d never been great at schooling my expressions like dad was, mom and I had that in common. We both wore our emotions on our sleeves for all to see. 

I sighed, settling in to ask the question that had been gnawing at me for some time now. “One of the kids at school said something today that bothered me,” I rubbed at the muscles in the back of my neck with one hand, my gaze cast down on the floor as I tried to find the right words. 

It took me several long breaths, but mom waited patiently even as I felt her own anxiety build. “They said…” I let out a long sigh, there really was no good way to say this. “They said it’s not fair that I have two High Lords for parents, or for you to have two mates. And it’s not the first time, either.” 

Mom wrung her apron uneasily between her paint streaked hands, her art now completely forgotten as she focused on me. “I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this love. We knew people might say things like this, Nyx. I wish I had better answers for you, but the Mother gave your fathers and I each two mates.” She looked up at me with apology in her eyes, something I never intended and didn’t need to hear from her again. “I never wanted it to affect you negatively though.” 

“I know mom, and I know we’ve talked it to death.” I ran a frustrated hand through my hair. “It’s just still a lot, you know?” A thought struck me then. I knew my parents were all mates, I knew they’d met around the time of Amarantha’s reign under the mountain. We’d had a lot of conversations that time so I wasn’t caught off guard if other kids or parents mentioned it, but still…

“How’d you all find out anyway?” 

Mom cocked her head slightly to the side, her brow furrowed just a bit. “What do you mean?”

“How’d you find out you’re all mates? I mean, we’ve talked about the mountain and how you met them, but I’ve never really heard the full story of how your bonds snapped.” 

A secretive smile slid across her face then, and my mom straightened her head toward me. “Would you like to hear the full story? I think you’re old enough now.”

“Only if you promise to spare the gross bits…” I said, internally cringing as the unbidden image of mentally walking in on them flashed through my mind again. Fighting back a shudder at the memory I continued,  "But I am pretty curious.” I smiled slightly, and her own brightened wide enough to light the whole room. 

“Are you too old to sit on mom’s lap for story time? I can change out of my paint clothes first, I know you’ve taken after your dad with how much you care for your clothes.” she asks, humor alight in her words. 

I feel the heat of a blush on my cheeks as I answer. “Definitely too old for sitting on your lap…but maybe not for the couch…” She knew what I meant. When I had bad dreams or hard days at school, sometimes I’d lay on the couch, head in her lap. It felt too juvenile to use the word ‘cuddles’ but I guess that’s what it was. A kid’s allowed to cuddle his mom right? 

A few minutes later, mom was back wearing leggings and one of her favorite sweaters. She sat on the couch next to the big window in the library and patted the seat next to her, warmth filling the space between us. I pushed off the wall from where I stood and went to join her. As I settled in, she began her story. “Alright Nyx, let’s start from the beginning. Here’s the story of how I met your fathers.” 

Continue reading at the first cut on AO3.

Please let me know if you would like off or on my taglist!: @pippsmcgee @born-to-riot @chunkypossum @bubybubsters @queercontrarian @yanny-77 @fieldofdaisiies @iftheshoef1tz @secret-third-thing

#acotar #acomaf #feysand #tamsand #feylin #feytamsand #poly!acotar #poly+acotarweek2024 #poly+acotarweek2024 d1 #spot the sneaky azris #nyx is a teenage menace but still love him #feyre throws a lot of shoes #Rhysand keeps secrets but what else is new #Tamlin is broody and lovesick #mother-son bonding #tamlin #feyre archeron #rhysand #nyxie pyxie #nyx archeron #nyx #acowar #under the mountain #spring court #night court #acotar angst #angst #pining #a court of thorns and roses #acotar fanfic

[chickenfics]

the way I love the ocean

Relationship: Robin Buckley x Female!Reader

Summary: It was the summer of ‘87. Nothing in your life had prepared you for Robin, but somehow everything had begun falling into place. It all started with a movie and a pair of ocean-blue eyes, and suddenly you were dancing to a Jukebox in a long-closed diner, or racing down the length of a pier, swimming in the moon-dipped lake and walking her home down yellow-lit streets, talking about the way The Smiths sound like indigo and the best time of the summer is when the fireflies start to come out.

It was the summer of ‘87, and you were falling in love.

Word Count: 7k

Content warning: brief discussions of homophobia, shitty parenting

A/N: She/her pronouns used for reader, and she is described as being able to ride a bike but no other descriptions are given. Y/N used sparingly.

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged for future chapters!

Fic Playlist!  Also on Ao3

Next Chapter  Masterlist

Chapter 1: Tango in the Night

"Hi, I'm looking for… uhm…" you took a shallow breath, eyes wandering across rosy skin dusted with freckles and the bluest eyes you’d ever seen.

You'd been searching for a movie for the past ten minutes, aware of every sound you made, every little shuffle of clothes or breath you took -- the need to cough for no reason at all suddenly squeezing at your throat. You had planned on asking the nearest employee if the store even had it to save yourself the struggle of scouring the shelves, but when you walked into Family Video a mere fifteen minutes before their closing time, you were greeted with… a girl. 

Not that you hadn’t expected a girl to work at a video store, it was just… she was a really pretty girl. Really pretty, and she'd smiled this gorgeous big smile as soon as you'd walked inside, and just like that your head had gone empty. Why couldn’t you just be normal? Why couldn’t you act like a regular person? It shouldn’t have been that hard. 

But, after ten minutes of searching -- and with the store now closing in five -- you found yourself standing in front of said pretty girl and trying to form words. 

“I’m looking for ‘Innerspace.’ It, uh, just came out on tape a few weeks ago so you might not have it yet, I just figured I’d check.”

Your mouth fell closed like a tomb and you blinked at the girl across the counter. ‘Robin,’ your eyes flickered down to her nametag -- just her name tag, you tried to remind yourself. She was wearing a plaid button-up, the colors of leaves and moss and dirt, and she had a brown tie tucked beneath her collar. Oh god--

“Oh, right. Yeah,” she nodded, eyes wide as she stared back at you. Her voice was raspy and low and had you digging your nails into your palms. “Yeah, um, new releases usually go straight to the back for filing, but, uhm, we might have gotten it. I can’t remember off the top of my head, so let me just… you said it’s called ‘Innerspace’?”

“Yeah,” you felt your face heating and wrung your slightly clammy fingers together beneath the counter, mercifully hidden from view. 

“Ok, let me just--”

“I can go look,” a voice cut through the store, and both of you turned towards a man in a matching green vest who was leaning against the far counter with his arms crossed. You hadn’t even realized he was there. 

“You keep, uh, entertaining our customer, yeah, Robs?” he added, pushing off to head for a doorway at the back of the room. 

“Uh, y-yeah. Sure,” the girl -- Robin -- replied, staring after him for a second before turning back around. It was hard to think under all her shades of rosy pink and blue and brown. Her hair reminded you of a mouse. You tried not to wonder if it was as soft as it looked. 

God, it looked soft. 

Just like her cheeks, or the skin of her nose as she wrinkled it in a small wince before smiling at you. 

“Uhmm, we sell tapes,” she gestured to a small display of cassettes. “Some of these are new, too. I mean, I know you’re looking for a movie, but,” she made another desperate little flourish that had you grinning like a fool. 

“No, no, it’s good,” you quickly assured. Then, somehow, “Uh… do you have any recommendations?”

She opened her mouth, eyes searching yours for a moment before jumping into motion. Leaning over the counter, she dragged the display sideways so she could rifle through the tapes. You found yourself leaning closer. 

“Y-Yeah, I mean… okay, this one just came out a few months ago. Have you heard of Fleetwood Mac? I mean -- I mean, of course you have,” her brow furrowed, a line indenting the skin between her eyebrows. “They’re Fleetwood Mac, obviously, but… h-have you?” 

With the question, the wrinkle smoothed out again as she raised her brow to look at you. You nodded, and you knew there was a smile on your face by the one that spread across hers. She was encouraged enough to keep going. 

“I, uh, don’t really know if you like their stuff, but they just released this new album, Tango in the Night,” Robin groaned softly, her smile growing. “It's so good. And I mean, Stevie Nicks is, like, so…” she faltered a little, hesitantly glancing up at you before her smile grew a bit smaller, a bit softer. 

“Sorry, I’m rambling aren't I? I do that sometimes. It’s probably, like, a condition or something--”

You laughed brightly, clapping a hand over your mouth when you realized you’d interrupted her, but she was watching you through her eyelashes and grinning. 

“No, it’s… it’s good. I like it,” you added, not sure if you were referencing the tape or her rambling. “I like Fleetwood Mac. And Stevie Nicks is--” super hot “--Great. She’s great.”

“Oh,” Robin said, released in a little breath, almost a sigh. “Okay, well--”

“Hey,” the other worker popped his head out of the back room, offering Robin, and then you, a vaguely apologetic look coupled with a shrug. “Yeah, we don’t have it yet. Sorry.”

“Oh, it’s okay. Really,” you waved. “Thanks for checking.”

“Hey, sure thing. That's what I’m here for,” he smiled, grabbing the front of his vest. “But it’s, uh, no problem, about the movie. We can just take your number and call you when it comes in. Right, Robin?”

“R… Right!” she jumped up a little, head whipping around to look at him before turning back to you. “I mean, if you want to, that is. You totally don’t, if it’s something you’re, like, not comfortable with, or… I mean, we’re, like, an official establishment, so we won’t sell your information to the government, or anything, haha…” she finished with a laugh that conveyed how quickly she was losing confidence. 

“Sure,” you offered, trying to give her as encouraging of a smile as you could without rocking your own confidence. In the end, you had to glance at your feet under the beaming grin she gave in reply. 

“Great! Cool-e-o. Um, let me just,” ducking down, she rifled beneath the counter before reappearing with a flourish. Your smile felt like it was at risk of tearing your face as you took in the way her tie had gone crooked and her hair all feathery. 

Slapping a notepad onto the countertop, she gave you an eager grin before pulling a pen out of the breast pocket of her vest. You paused, momentarily forgetting your phone number in the most panic-filled two seconds of your life before giving it to her, hoping your voice didn’t sound as shaky as it felt. You watched Robin jot down your number with nimble fingers and endearingly bubbly penmanship. 

“I like your rings,” you shyly stated, nodding to the silver jewelry that decorated her pale fingers. A simple silver band on her pointer, a wider piece on her middle, and a band with a pale blue gemstone on her ring. 

“Th… Thanks,” she whispered, glancing up at you, her mouth slightly ajar as she seemed to hold her breath. Then she jotted down the last two digits of your phone number and sat the pen down.

“Oh, and, uh… I’ll take this, too, if that’s okay,” you slid the cassette across the counter. Robin’s eyes widened.

It would take you nearly five minutes outside the now-closed Family Video to catch your breath. With your back pressed against the hard brick of the building, you felt a laugh bubble up your throat, rippling out into the evening air. With a small bag containing ‘Tango in the Night,’ you stepped onto your bike and thought about how sometimes not being normal paid off. 

________________________________________________________________

 “Holy shit, holy shit -- holy shit, Steve.”

“Quit freaking out on me, Buckley,” Steve warned, worried that the girl was actually going to pass out with how fast she was pacing through the rom-com aisle, her hands held out on either side of her, gesturing with every “holy shit” she uttered. 

“Okay, okay,” Robin shook her head, pressing her voice into something that vaguely resembled composure. “That wasn’t, like, anything, right? It was just a totally normal customer-employee exchange.”

“Robin,” Steve deadpanned. “That girl was full-on flirting with you.”

“Shut up,” Robin rasped, voice squeaking at a frequency that probably would have had the neighborhood dogs howling. “She was not, she was… Oh my god, she was. She definitely was…”

“Uh, yup,” Steve confirmed, brow lowered even though he was trying not to freak out himself. Robin didn’t have the best luck with dating, and Steve had just witnessed the biggest win she’d had in… ever. She’d even gotten the girl’s number. 

“Okay, but,” she continued, and Steve bit back a groan. “What if she was actually into you and was just flirting with me to get to you?”

“What-- that is literally not a thing people do, you dumbass. She was flirting with you.”

“Ahh! I don’t--” Robin groaned, hands reaching up to grab at her hair. 

“I mean, seriously, Rob. She bought the tape you were gushing about. She gave you her goodman number, for Christ’s sake--” 

“Yeah, because she wants fucking ‘Innerspace’ when it comes in. That’s all.”

“Look, I love you, but you’re being an actual idiot right now. She was totally checking you out. I saw it with my own two eyes,” he made a peace sign and waved it at his face. “And trust me, I know what it looks like when a girl is checking someone out.”

“Gross,” Robin winced, face screwing up miserably as she tried not to have a full-on crisis. “But still, even if she was, there’s no way I stand a chance. Like, there’s actually no way…”

“Well,” Steve began, the corner of his mouth bunching into a knowing smirk. “I guess we’ll find out once you call her to let her know that we’ve got, uh…” he turned away, looking out into the store as he reached around his back and pulled ‘Innerspace’ from the waistband of his jeans. 

“Oh my god. Oh my god,” Robin shoved him. “What the hell is wrong with you, dingus?”

“Hey, don’t yell at me, I’m just being a good wingman! A pretty damn good one, too, considering you wouldn't have even gotten her number without me jumpstarting your brain." 

Robin pushed her tongue into her cheek before running it over her teeth. She rolled her eyes, then smiled begrudgingly. 

“Do you actually think she was flirting with me?”

“Yes!” he said it before she’d even gotten the full question out. 

Robin took a breath, and then she brought the front of her vest up to cover her face and squealed softly into the fabric -- half excited, half panicked -- before throwing the material back down. Her hair was a frizzy curtain in front of her face and she was definitely a bit red. 

“Feel better?”

“No.”

“Well that’s too bad,” Steve tossed a rag at her. “Because we’ve got a store to close and I still have to drive your flustered ass home.”

He turned around, and Robin stared after him with her brow furrowed in contemplative annoyance. 

“I’m not flustered--”

“Are you shitting me?”

________________________________________________________________

You listened to the album as soon as you got home. Leaning your bike against the baby blue siding of your parent’s house, you raced into the kitchen to make a quick dinner before taking it to your room, the little plastic Family Video bag looped around your wrist. 

Your tape player was old. It had belonged to your mom before she passed it down to you, all worn and well-loved, decorated with a few band stickers that had long since faded to a pale, washed-up color. Even so, when you popped the deck and carefully put the cassette inside, that old, faded player turned colorful with life as the first few beats of ‘Big Love’ started playing. 

The echoey vocals of Linsday Buckingham hummed through the speakers as he sang “looking out for love," and your lips curled into a smile, sitting cross-legged on your bed as your mind filled with images of blue eyes and tawny freckles. How could you not think of her when she was the one who had recommended the tape? You tried to convince yourself that was the only reason. You knew it was the biggest lie you’d ever told. 

Leaning back against the headboard, you ate your dinner through a smile. When the next song whirred on, you reached over to your nightstand to grab the case, flipping it around to scan down the list of songs. You set your dish aside and laid back as Stevie Nicks’s voice filled your room with ‘Seven Wonders’.

“So it’s hard to find 

Someone with that kind of intensity

You touched my hand, I played it cool…”

Bringing your hands up to your forehead, you let them rest there, the coolness of your fingers not doing much to quell the heat that had started swimming in your head. You tried to consider the possibility that maybe the girl -- Robin, you tried her name out in your thoughts -- had been as nervous as you had for the same reason. You remembered the way she’d blushed when your hands had touched, or the way she'd laughed nervously as her eyes, so fucking blue, had scanned your face. Had she looked at your lips? Did it mean anything if she had?

“So long ago

It’s a certain time, it’s a certain place

You touched my hand and you smiled

All the way back you held out your hand

But I hope, and if I pray

Ooh, it might work out someday…”

Groaning softly, you dragged a pillow over your face, deciding that if your cold hands wouldn’t put you out, you’d just have to smother yourself. 

There was no way… was there? Like, no actual way that Robin liked… well -- would ever like you. Right? Most girls were overly friendly with one another; you’d figured that out a long time ago, after mixing up so many signals that you’d realized the way you liked girls was different from the way they liked you. That the way you felt about girls was… abnormal. At least, it had seemed that way, when you looked around. 

But… you couldn’t be the only one. You knew you weren’t the only one. You’d grown up, since then, and you'd heard about people like you on the news and in school. You’d seen what happened to the boys that acted differently than the rest of their classmates -- you'd heard what they were called. You’d seen other girls being called “dykes,” had seen girls ostracized from their friend groups out of the fear she’d spread herself around like some kind of disease. 

And sure, you’d seen how bad it could be, but that also meant that there were others out there who understood. That had to mean that there were happy endings for people like you -- it was just… happy endings felt so far away from the things that actually happened. It felt like something out of a storybook rather than something that could happen right here in Hawkins. Right here, where a pretty girl had watched you through her eyelashes and blushed when you complimented her…

 Was there a chance that Robin hadn’t just seen you as a friendly customer?

“No. No way,” you said it aloud, your words breaking through Stevie Nicks’ vocals. 

She was probably dating her co-worker. He was hot, right? He seemed charming, he’d called her “Robs” so they were obviously close. The sudden thought of Robin being with the man in the store made your chest tighten. You groaned again, rolling onto your stomach and burying your face into your sheets, trying to cover yourself up, trying to be swallowed whole because it had to be easier than thinking about Robin’s lips against his when you wanted them against yours. 

The tape whirred and clicked, and the next song started like it'd been sent to mock you. 

“Come on, baby

We better make a start

You better make it soon before you break my heart”

Well, at least she had a good taste in music. Yet another thing about her that was already driving you crazy, and you’d barely spoken to her for five minutes. You didn’t even know her last name -- and you only even knew her first because she’d been wearing a fucking name tag. 

Suddenly you sat up, pillow flying off of your head as you realized that--

“Holy shit. She’s going to call me…”

She had your number. She was going to call you when the movie came in. You’d have an excuse to talk to her again. Hell, she’d have an excuse to talk to you again, if she wanted it. If not, she could always get her co-worker slash potential boyfriend to do it instead. Either way, she had your number, and that meant there was a chance. A slim one, but a chance.

“Holy fucking shit,” you said it again, breathless as you grinned so hard your face ached, and fell back into your pillows. 

Maybe a happy ending wasn't such a reach after all.

________________________________________________________________

Over the next week, you listened to ‘Tango in the Night’ at least five more times. It was a good album, and you would have enjoyed it even without the added connection to the pretty girl who worked in the video store that you definitely weren't crushing on, no way. And every day, you waited for a call from her. Whenever you weren’t home, you found yourself worrying that you’d miss it -- hoping and praying that she’d call when you weren’t on one of your shifts. 

You worked at a diner that sat just along the edge of downtown Hawkins called Tiffany’s Kitchen. The owner, Tiffany -- who was also your boss -- was a sweet, tiny lady, thrice divorced, who had only recently opened the diner after Benny’s Burgers shut down in ‘83. She was new to the business, but everyone loved her -- employees included, of which there weren’t many. You, two of her children, both in their thirties, and another kid your age, both of you fresh out of high school with no college plans in sight. 

After graduating last year, your parents had encouraged you to apply to colleges around the state, but you hadn’t gotten into any of them. You didn’t really mind. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to leave Hawkins -- every kid your age wanted to leave Hawkins -- you just… weren’t sure what you wanted to do with your life. You didn’t know who you were yet, and college was something that you had no clue where to even start with.

Anyway, you were more than content working at Tiffany’s, making enough money that your parents weren’t completely horrified by your decision to stay in Hawkins -- and at home. You could contribute to the bills, and for right now that was the most important thing to them. For now. But rather than try and figure out what to do with your future as your parents so frequently encouraged, instead you were thinking about the girl from Family Video who you’d talked to a whole one time and who probably didn’t even remember that you existed. It was easier than thinking about college or a career, and it was infinitely more pleasant than thinking about the future. So you passed your days with daydreams of blue eyes and a pretty smile, and a Fleetwood Mac song behind every moment of bussing tables and taking orders. 

It wasn’t until the following Friday that anything happened. 

You were sitting in your room after your shift, trying to pass the post-dinner time without falling asleep too early, when you heard your father's voice calling over the sound of your tape player. 

“Hey, Doc! Someone’s on the phone for you!”

You just managed to crank the volume down before flying off of your bed, smiling at both his nickname for you -- which had come about thanks to the many Saturday mornings you'd spent watching Bugs Bunny with him when you were little, laying out on the carpet in your pajamas -- as well as the jolt of excitement that had just shot through you like lightning. And panic. Excitement and panic. 

“Yeah,” you yelled, coming to a sliding stop by the phone as your socks struggled to grip the hardwood floor. You grabbed onto the wall for support, then looked over at your dad. 

“Someone from some video place? Said you left your number…”

“Yep! Thanks, dad,” you grinned through his confusion, hoping he wouldn’t ask any questions. He didn’t, wordlessly passing you the receiver, and suddenly you wondered if you might pass out. 

“Hi,” your voice was breathless, both hands coming up to hold the yellow phone as you watched your dad round the corner to the living room, out of sight. 

“Uh, h-hi. This is Robin -- from Family Video,” she quickly added. Her voice sounded even raspier through the crackle of the receiver. You were definitely about to fall over. “Uhm, y-you asked us to call when we got ‘Innerspace’-- or, I mean, we said we’d call you when we got it. Kind of the same thing, but, you know… anyway, it just came in.”

“Awesome,” you smiled even though you knew she couldn’t see it. “Thank you again. I really appreciate it.”

“Oh, pshhh, of course. Yeah, of course. No big deal. I mean, that's what we're here for, right? Haha… uhm…”

You wanted to say something, anything to get her to not hang up, but the silence that followed her voice was heavy with an almost anticipative breath, like Robin was working something out. 

“Um,” she started again, her voice growing soft. “I, uh, didn’t get your name…”

“Oh my god, you didn’t -- sorry about that. I'm Y/N.”

She repeated your name slowly, as if making sure that it would stick in her memory. You felt a shiver run down your back, your stomach fluttering. 

“Nice to meet you,” she softly replied. 

“Nice to meet you, too.” You turned sideways, leaning up against the wall and hugging an arm to your chest, cheek pressing against the receiver as you smiled.

“Um, okay -- look, I know this is probably, like, completely weird and strange, and, I don’t know, maybe even kind of creepy -- and you totally don’t have to say yes, or say anything, for that matter, but… Steve and I are going to see a movie tomorrow. The drive-in just opened back up again and it’s been forever since we’ve, like, actually watched a movie. Which is crazy because we work in a place that sells them, haha….”

You could practically hear her wince of pain, but you didn’t want to interrupt considering she hadn’t even asked you a question yet. 

“Anyway, I was wondering if you wanted to come? Like I said, no pressure! But, uh… we’d love -- I’d… it’d be cool, you know, if you wanted to.”

At that very moment, you were doomed. Your brain had disappeared somewhere through the ceiling and out into the evening Hawkins sky. 

“I’d love to,” you were saying before you even had the chance to think about what that meant. 

You’d met her once -- what if this was some sort of ploy to murder you and dump your body in Lover's Lake or something? What if once she actually hung out with you she thought you were weird? What if she was expecting this to be some sort of double date? 

None of it mattered, though; not a single concern your brain could come up with. Literally nothing in the world would have convinced you to say no. 

“Great,” Robin breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay, cool. Uhm… so, we could, like, pick you up at your house -- or you could meet us at FV and we could take you from there. We’ll be working all day so we’re gonna head out from here, anyway.”

“I can meet you there, no problem,” you replied. You heard her exhale a breath that was unsteady enough to be a laugh but hadn't quite managed to go all the way. “Uhm… who’s Steve? -- if you don’t mind me asking.”

“Oh, no, not at all. Steve’s just my co-worker--” you heard a distant shout. “Okay, okay, he’s also my very best friend in the world -- happy?” she ducked away to call the last part. You gathered that Steve must have been listening. 

“Sorry,” you could hear her smile. “He’s the dingus that checked for your tape the other week. Stupid hair, even stupider smile. Dresses like a middle-aged dad who wants to divorce his wife but doesn’t have the balls to actually go through with it…”

You burst out laughing, quickly ducking your head down and throwing a hand over your mouth to muffle your giggles. You could hear Robin laughing, too, even as she yelled at someone on her side of the line. 

“I can’t drive, so he’s my chauffeur.”

“Cool,” you smiled. “Sounds like fun. Is… is there a time I should meet you, or…”

“Oh! Yes, uh… Steve?!”

 You heard a distant “Seven-thirty” before Robin turned back to the phone and said, “Does seven-thirty work?”

“Yeah, that’s perfect,” your chest felt tight all of the sudden. “I guess I’ll see you then?”

“Yes. Yep. Uh… see you then,” Robin’s slightly spastic voice replied, chipper and adorable, and that feeling in your chest grew to an almost painful degree. 

“O-Okay. Bye.”

“Bye,” she replied, her voice timid, followed by the click of the receiver. A busy single blared in your ears as you stared across the kitchen. 

“Hey honey,” your mom began, peering her head around the wall that separated you from the living room. “Who was that?”

“Just a, um… friend,” you replied. “Friends, actually. They invited me to go see a movie with them tomorrow.”

“Oh,” she smiled, big and a bit forced. “Kids from school?”

“Yeah,” you lied. Well, half a lie. Steve and Robin had to have gone to the same school as you, considering Hawkins only had one, but that wasn’t exactly how you knew them. Your mom didn’t need to know that, though. 

“Uh…” you set the phone back on the hook and slowly started backing towards the stairs. “I’m gonna go take a shower. Yell if you need anything.”

“O… kay,” your mom called as you bounded up the stairs, taking two steps at a time and nearly wiping out as you whipped around the railing and down the hall. 

By the time you reached your room, you were out of breath, but it only took you about three seconds before you burst into giggles, making the softest noises of excitement you could manage as you threw your hands over your face and shook your head. 

“Holy shit. Holy shit!” you whispered, grinning wide enough to make your cheeks hurt. 

You felt like your body was exploding in the best way possible -- like all your cells were vibrating at a frequency that made your head spin. You felt like you could have run for miles and still kept going

It was practically impossible to get to sleep that night. You lay awake, staring at your ceiling as your brain ran through every scenario that could possibly happen, both good and bad. 

Little did you know, across town Robin was staring up at her ceiling, too. 

________________________________________________________________

“So I’ve been thinking--”

“Jesus Christ, Robin, it’s literally eight-thirty in the morning.”

“Yeah, and? That means I only have eleven hours to make sure I don’t make a complete fool of myself.”

“Off to a great start,” Steve sarcastically replied. “Look, can your relationship crisis at least wait until we get to work,” he gestured to the car they were sitting in. 

“But that’s the whole point, Steve. We’re not even in a relationship yet, so I need to make sure everything goes perfectly otherwise she’ll think I’m a total loser or something and she’ll never speak to me again, and then I’ll have blown my latest and most promising chance at a happy relationship since that time I accidentally got gum in Sadie Elenburger’s hair in fifth grade.”

“Alright, slow down,” Steve interrupted, raising his eyebrows. “First of all, that’s kind of sad. Second, just… you know, be yourself--” Robin groaned “--And as long as you don’t chew gum, you’ll be golden.”

“Steve. This is not a joke.”

“No, I know,” he seriously replied, wondering how she was already so tense this early in the morning. “This shit’s gotta be bad for your blood pressure.”

“It is,” she affirmed, pulling down the sun visor and flicking open the mirror. She’d put a little extra makeup on today -- which for Robin just meant eyeliner and some faint glitter in the corners -- and rubbed anxiously at the skin beneath her eyes. “Ugh! I look like a fucking raccoon.”

“You look fine,” he tried to reassure her. “Nice! You look nice.”

She groaned again, sliding her hands down her face before slamming the visor back up. 

“Oh! And another thing I thought of--” Steve sighed “--You’re taking us, right, and then there’s her and me, so… how are we all going to sit inside your car without making it super awkward?”

“What?” he squeezed his eyes shut as long as he could safely manage before looking back at the road, wishing they would suddenly get abducted by aliens or encounter Bigfoot so this conversation could be over. Probably would have been less stressful for Robin, actually. 

Robin, who turned sideways in her seat to shoot him a frantically annoyed look because apparently he should have been reading her mind. 

“You’re driving, so if we both sit in the back it’ll be, like, mega weird -- like we’re being fucking chaperoned, or something--”

“Isn’t that what’s happening?”

“But if I sit in the front, that’s, like, rude, right? Because then she’s back there all by herself. But if I let her sit in the front, she’ll probably feel uncomfortable because it’ll just be you and her up there, and then I won’t be able to talk to her anyway, and then she’ll fall in love with you instead of me.”

“Woah woah, hey,” Steve hunched his shoulders defensively. “Why would she feel uncomfortable with me? What’s wrong with me?”

“Nothing, Steve,” she impatiently replied. “It’s just, you know, most girls don’t like being thrown into a tiny little death box with some random dude they've literally only spoken to once.”

“And now you’re insulting my car.”

“Focus, Steve! This isn’t about you, this is about me and the very real possibility that I am going to absolutely blow this date and die alone.”

Steve froze, turning slowly to stare at her. 

“D…Date. You just called it a date…”

Robin stared back at him blankly before smacking herself on the forehead. Which didn’t stop Steve from grinning. 

“Look, just relax, okay,” he offered, voice softening. “We’ll just… I don’t know, we’ll think of someone to invite last minute. That way they can sit up with me and you can sit back with your girlfriend.”

“Seriously, don’t even joke about that,” Robin said, but there was a reluctant, albeit pained, smile working its way onto her face. “I think I’d actually explode if that ever really happened.”

“Well,” Steve smiled at her. “Let’s just get you through this date, yeah? And you can’t fucking do that if you give yourself a stroke by ten in the morning and I have to rush you to the hospital to be revived.”

Robin snorted, one side of her mouth curling into that smirk that she used whenever she was still trying to act annoyed with him. 

“At least wait until the movie so she can be the one giving you mouth-to-mouth instead of me.”

“Ew, gross,” her face screwed up, but they were both laughing now. However, by the time they arrived at Family Video, Robin was back on her panicked mission to invite another one of their friends along. 

Throughout the duration of the morning, Steve insisted that Dustin was absolutely not coming. They considered inviting Max before Steve remembered that she and her mom were visiting family this weekend. Lucas was a brief option before Steve shut that one down, too making a new rule that they had to think of someone over seventeen to come along. 

That left… 

“Eddie,” they both said, much to the confusion of the woman they had been in the process of checking out. 

“No. No way,” Steve insisted while Robin rang the lady up and gave her a smile and a clipped “have a nice day” before turning back around. 

“Please, Steve,” she begged. “You wanted someone over seventeen… he’s definitely over sevent--”

“I know, I know, I just… he’s Eddie.”

“Yeah? And?”

“And?... are you sure you want to risk him scaring your new girlfriend away.”

Robin groaned at the title, raking her hands over her forehead and back through her hair. 

“Well, it’s better than you awkwardly third-wheeling. Please,” she drew the word out, and Steve couldn’t stand more than a few seconds of her puppy eyes. 

“Oh fuck me -- fine,” he surrendered, throwing a hand up. “But you owe me one.”

“Right, yes. I owe you one. Hell, I owe you a million. Thank you thank you thank you!” she was practically bursting with a wired mix of nerves and excitement. 

Little did she know, across town, you were having the same problem…

________________________________________________________________

You’d woken early and spent the better half of the morning cleaning your room. If you didn’t do something, you’d just sit there; and if you just sat there, you’d come up with a million different reasons why this was a bad idea. So you blasted Fleetwood Mac and busied yourself with rearranging. You changed your sheets and tried not to dwell on your personal flaws that Robin could potentially find annoying. You vacuumed your floor and wondered if she’d ask you about the tape. 

You had just considered going through and rearranging your closet when you realized that you’d have to figure out what you were wearing tonight, and then you’d promptly flopped yourself onto your freshly made bed and tried not to scream. You’d be lucky if you made it to seven-thirty. Then, if you managed that, you’d be lucky if you made it to see the sun rise on a new day. 

It hadn’t crossed your mind that maybe you were being dramatic. 

When you emerged from your room for the first time that day, it was already lunchtime. 

“Well, look who finally decided to get up,” your dad said from his spot at the kitchen table, eyes never leaving his paper. A half-empty cup of coffee left a stain on the wood. 

“Been up for a while, actually,” you murmured. “Just cleaning my room.”

“Cleaning?” he asked, disbelieving. “D’you hear that, mom? She’s cleaning.”

“Mmm,” your mom hummed, turning around from the stove to glance at you. 

“Should get her to do the spare room, next. You’ve got all that extra junk in there.”

“Yeah, sure,” you dryly replied, your tone pinched but even enough to not get yourself into trouble. “Yeah, I’ll get to it at some point.”

You pulled some leftovers out of the fridge, heating them as quickly as possible before turning to head back up to your room. 

“See you later, I guess,” your dad called after your retreat, and you stilled for long enough to convince yourself that the whole situation wasn’t worth the guilt he had you feeling before booking it up the stairs. 

It would be easier to be around them if they didn’t criticize you all the time. Or complain about you to your face. It would be easier to spend time with them if they actually made you want to. You found your thoughts drifting back to Robin and her soft eyes, her eager smile -- that genuine way she had about her. Even though she seemed nervous, she wasn’t afraid to be herself. You liked that. 

And suddenly you didn’t feel so nervous anymore. Excitement at getting out, getting away from your life with someone like Robin, replaced your previous apprehensions about whether or not she would like you or the possibility that you’d make a fool of yourself. Because really, your parents were living lives that they would have said they were happy or content with, but they were really just as miserable as everyone. You didn’t want your life to pass you by so quickly that you woke up one day with a husband and a kid you didn’t even know you were pushing away, and a cookie-cutter life. You wanted to feel things. 

Robin had already made you feel things and you barely knew her. 

So whatever happened tonight, you were ready for it. The notion of it was exciting. 

You hastily ate your food and then stood in front of your closet like it was an amphitheater. Raking through rows of shirts and sweaters and pants and skirts, you tried to put the jigsaw pieces into something that resembled a respectable outfit. It took you nearly an hour of trying things on and immediately ripping them off before you circled back to something that resembled what you’d been wearing that day you’d gone into Family Video; they were clothes you wore often enough to be comfortable in, but also nice enough to give you a necessary boost of confidence. 

Now that you were dressed, you checked your wristwatch. A disappointing ‘two-thirty’ greeted you, meaning that you still had a little over four hours before you could even think about leaving. You flopped down onto your bed and began flipping through a book, trying to ignore the way your eyelids felt heavy and your head seemed to sink right into the pillow. 

A few hours later, you realized you’d fallen asleep when you were jolted awake at the sound of your mother calling you for dinner. Flying up out of bed, you quickly looked at your watch. It was only five-fifteen -- you had plenty of time. Descending the stairs, you greeted your parents with a tired smile that probably looked more like a grimace. 

“Well,” your dad insisted. “Where are you going, all dressed up?”

Immediately feeling self-conscious -- and fighting that emotion with everything in you -- you glanced down and then back up at him with a dismissive shrug. You liked the way you looked; an off-hand comment from your dad wouldn’t change that. Or, so you tried to tell yourself. 

“She’s going to the movies with some friends, remember,” your mom told him, offering you a plate and a smile. “You look nice.”

“Thanks,” you managed, taking your plate to sit down at the table. 

“You could borrow some of my makeup if you wanted,” she sat down next to you. 

“I’m alright, but thank you.” 

“You’re not meeting a boy, are you?” your dad asked, raising an eyebrow as he took a sip from his cup. 

“No,” you replied, shoving a spoonful of food into your mouth, wishing that this conversation wasn’t happening. 

“Good. No boys, remember.”

He thought he was being funny. Jesus. You hid your grimace behind your cup and nodded. 

“Yeah, ‘course, dad. No boys.”

If your father knew what you were really doing, he’d likely beg for you to spend more time with boys. Because, as often as your parents -- and other adults in general -- made jokes about how you should stay away from boys as long as you could, no one actually expected you to. It was all some grand inside joke that adults seemed to have; just because they were so unhappy with their own relationships, they thought it gave them the right to comment on what they believed your future one would be like. 

Because, in their eyes, you would marry a man by the time you were twenty-five and settle down, have a few kids, complain about your husband to all of your girl friends, and then retire. End of story. So, when they told you to “stay away from boys” as if it were the funniest joke in the world, they really didn’t mean a word of it. Why they said it, you couldn’t figure out. All you knew was that it made your stomach hurt. 

Because tonight, you hadn’t gotten all dressed up to see a boy. 

“I should finish getting ready,” you said after you helped your mother clear the dishes away. “I’ll need to leave in an hour or so.”

Bounding back up the stairs, you took a few deep breaths and tried not to completely freak out. You felt like you’d been slightly panicking for the past several hours, but now that seven-thirty was getting closer and closer, you could feel your anxiety cranking up to a ten. In the bathroom, you brushed your teeth, then used some mouthwash for good measure. 

You grabbed at your face, smoothing over your eyebrows and adjusting your shirt across your shoulders, momentarily wondering if it revealed too much skin around your collar before reminding yourself that it wasn’t like you were in nothing but your underwear, and Robin wouldn’t freak out because you were wearing a slightly low-cut shirt. It wasn’t even low-cut. 

“Jesus fucking Christ,” you said to the mirror, dragging your hands down your face, trying not to nit-pick the imperfections you were finding there. 

“Shut up,” you said to your brain. “Adds character. Yeah, sure.”

With a shake of your head, you spent another minute or so of nervous grooming before you locked eyes with your own reflection and tried to give yourself a final, desperate boost of confidence. 

“Don’t fuck this up,” is what you settled on, and then you were waving goodbye to your parents with the promise of being home by midnight. 

________________________________________________________________

Taglist:  @alonezz (you’re a saint for waiting so long, I hope you enjoy it <3)

#robin buckley x reader #robin buckley x you #robin buckley x female reader #robin x reader #robin buckley x y/n #robin buckley fanfic #robin buckley #st #stranger things #ST fanfic #steve harrington #steve and robin #ao3 link #ao3 fanfic #fanfiction

[sophie-hatter-jenkins]

HP Rec Fest Day 12 - A WIP You're Following

I have two picks for Day 12 of the @hprecfest. Actually, I'm following a bunch of WIPs (the Hinny corner of the fandom is truly spoiled right now!), but I've picked out these two as a vote of confidence for two authors that I know have faced some challenges this year.

Firstly:

The Path From You by @takearisk-ao3

Hot Auror Harry? Check! Feisty, independent, Ginny? Check! Huge amounts of pining, miscommunication, top notch mystery, stubborn idiots, romance, action, all written with warmth and humour that leaps out of the screen at you - literally the works? Check! Honestly, this has everything - I love it so, so much. I'm probably due a re-read:-)

Rating - M

Relationships - Harry/Ginny

Summary:

At 22, Ginny had lived through several lifetimes worth of misery. She’d been deceived, betrayed, and possessed; her very soul almost wrung out into nothing. She’d been subordinated, humiliated, and tortured; lived almost an entire year surrounded by enemies. Fought Death Eaters and dementors and giant spiders. Been heartbroken, anguished, and grief stricken. Lost friends and mentors and a brother.

And through it all, she’d survived… because of luck, or sheer force of will.

Maybe a little of both.

If she could suffer and endure and prevail through all of that, she could live through some anonymous wanker plaguing her with badly written poetry.

Secondly:

Quidditch Is For Losers by @fizzyginfizz

The original novels from Ginny's POV. We're up to the start of the POA arc, and I lapped up every word. I've read a few fics that include COS from Ginny's POV and this is by far my favourite - the portrait of how she slips from into the darkness, and the way her brothers rally to pull her back again is just gorgeous. I'm so excited for what's to come next!

Rating - M

Relationships - Harry/Ginny, ALL of the Weasleys being awesome

Summary:

Ginny Weasley’s Ultimate Awesome Life Plan™: - Go To Hogwarts and Be Better Than Ron at Everything. - Become Youngest House Player In A Century. - Earn Universal Admiration for Quaffle Juggling and Brilliant Brilliance. - Be Best Friends with Harry Potter.

*order of accomplishment may vary because: Pfft. Details.

Sometimes, life decides to bollocks up Ginny's plans.

#hprecfest2023 #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter #ginny weasley #harry x ginny #hinny

[frownyalfred]

Gonna pile on here as another fic author: I don't think most people realize that authors can and do read public bookmarks, but oh god I wish they would, it's somehow worse then getting outright hate in the inbox

I write popular stuff like you, which I think makes it worse? (which is also why this is on anon lol) People assume I'll never see them say my fic is overhyped or too long, I guess

I have a lot of grace for the accidental public bookmarks. I know it happens sometimes. I've seen this argument wrung six different ways on the ao3 subreddit, and the conclusion I always come to is this: even if it's not done with malicious intent, it does affect authors. And you can't just expect authors to ignore a bookmark that 1) they cannot remove and 2) is slapped right onto their fic for everyone else to see.

It's like walking up to a busker playing piano on the subway and leaving a permanent sticky note on their keyboard that says "6/10 meh could've been better" that they can't ever take off. And they just have to look at it, and make their peace with it, which are important things for creators to be able to do, of course, but puts the onus of being the "better person" solely on the author?

"Well don't look at the bookmarks" "it's not a bad rating" "bookmarks are for readers, not authors" I GET these points. I am also a reader. I read and use bookmarks as recs. But giving out unsolicited criticism, regardless of venue, has always been seen as distasteful. Especially when the things being criticized are done 1) for free 2) in the author's spare time and 3) are so easy to suppress/crush with one poorly-placed comment or bookmark.

I don't say this to rant about how my own writing has been impacted by bookmarks, because while I'll bitch about it here, I'm not really thinking about myself. I'm thinking about the baby author or the new fandom arrival whose success and presence in this fandom is so tenuous, that one bookmark can knock them out of the game entirely. I'm talking about when we forget that there are real people, with real lives, on the other side of that ao3 username. The people who have quit writing because of stuff like this.

I'm not saying you have to like every fic. I'm not saying you can't rec fics to others with valid criticisms attached -- we all do it! Hey, I loved this fic but it's a little rough at the start! I've said that so many times. Would I ever put that in my public bookmark of that work? Absolutely not.

If you've erred with public bookmarks, it's not the end of the world. Make them private or maybe add some thoughts to the bookmark other than a rating. I've seen too many rating "codes" to believe it's all innocuous mistakes. And trust me, slapping a 2/5 on a poor little oneshot is one of the worst things you can do to a new or aspiring author.

/endrant

#sorry for the rant #i got a little carried away #asks #anon #fic #fanfic #fanfiction #writing #ao3 #archive of our own #writing things #author things #reader things

[damedechance]

a tribute to What Lies Inside

an Azris fic by @ofduskanddreams

Azris in gold for @ofduskanddreams

READ ON AO3 and tell her how much you love it

If you haven't read this yet, first of all what the hell are you doing? Second of all, the final chapter was just posted so now is the PERFECT time! I just finished it and obviously it was so overwhelmingly perfect that I have to gush about it here so I have somewhere to put all my feelings

I have book hangover in only the best of ways. Reading this entire fic has been like such an absolute dream. From start to finish, I felt like I was right there along with Azriel and Eris. The magic of this ship is that the two of them each have so much potential for personal growth. They each shove their feelings far down beneath the surface, and I so greatly enjoyed seeing them come into themselves throughout the course of their narrative. I cannot describe to anyone just how FULL to bursting my heart felt when I read that final line. I won't spoil it for anyone (seriously, if you haven't read this wtf are you doing?) But it was like we were down there at the bottom of this dark, murky pool Azriel and Eris had created by refusing to acknowledge the deepest parts of themselves, and upon finishing this fic, we came up for air right along with them.

If you couldn't tell, I'm sobbing.

Not to mention, the way @ofduskanddreams (love of my life) masterfully wields words, weaving this impeccable, luxuriant prose had my jaw dropping CONSTANTLY. From lines that were so poignant in their simplicity that it wrung out my heart, to the most absurdly hilarious one-liners, to the HOTTEST and most mouth-watering details... (Eris in rings, thank you very much) I was so constantly left speechless. Absolutely gobsmacked. I am so awed that there is so much pure talent in these words, and that the entire world hasn't had the honor of getting to read them, yet. They should.

@ofduskanddreams I hope you are rewarding yourself by relaxing, and I hope you understand just how deeply this fic has impacted everyone who's read it. You truly accomplished something great within these pages. You deserve all of the praise that people give you, and I want you to remember that. This is a masterpiece. I DO remember our first conversation about this idea, and I was just as mesmerized by it then as I am now, if not more so. Take a bow. You deserve it.

#azris #azris fanfiction #acotar #azriel #eris vanserra #high lord eris #what lies inside #holy grail #acotar fanfiction #fanfiction

[subzeroparade]

Doing the Writing Review 2023 open tag left by @tinygigas, because taking stock of the things you’ve accomplished is supposedly good for your mental health, or so I’ve heard.

(this tag is open so tag yourself and talk about your writing •ᴗ• unless this post has made you go "I should be writing" in which case, go write).

Words and fics  ➻ 151,905 words of exclusively Bloodborne work because I decided to give myself wholly and unconditionally to an almost decade-old fandom (as opposed to last year, exclusively Elden Ring) posted on AO3  ➻ 10 fics posted on AO3  ➻2 WIPs, one of which should be done by the end of the year. 

Ships ➻ Mostly Ludwig/Laurence, though I think in regards to the “Moon Divorce people come get your juice” tag, I too now count as Moon Divorce people. Also Caryll/Rom, rarepair of my heart. 

Top Fic by Kudos ➻ Litanies (73)

Top Fic by Hits ➻ The Feast We Were Promised (1,189)

Fandom Events  I organised/ran a little writing workshop for some friends & acquaintances that I think (and hope) went rather well. Everyone’s work was delightful and they took feedback with more grace and enthusiasm than many undergrads I’ve been paid to give these workshops to. 

Upcoming Projects ➻ The so-called Moon Deal fic - because I call it that - or at least Part 1 of it by the end of the year. ➻ Some short/experimental pieces if I can get around to it. Something to push me out of my comfort zone, in which I otherwise sit and refuse to budge. 

Writing Reflections  ➻ I am overjoyed to have had conversations here and elsewhere that have wrung entire fics out of me based on statements not even meant to be prompts - including, Laurence sits on Ludwig’s lap to shave him and Why does Gehrman dress like discount Dracula? ➻ The chance to do real, systematic studies of some of my favourite authors, and find new ones to add to my repertory. All writing is fundamentally derivative - so you might as well get intimate with the voices you love the most.  ➻ Under any and all flashy technical mastery and thoughtful research remains the primacy of storytelling. That’s the music. 

Thanks for reading, and especially to those who've taken the time to engage. It's WIP Wednesday, so a little snippet of upcoming work below the cut.

#bloodborne #writing #wip #wip wednesday #bloodborne fanfic

[moviegeek03]

SEE YOU SOON (5/6 TK - MOM FIC)

3k | AO3

Summary: TK has always had a close relationship with Gwyn. She was there for him, more times than he could count, in more ways than he could ever know. But, when he moved to Austin, he gained some more amazing women in his life, ones who always found a way to look out for him when Gwyn wasn’t able to. (Aka: Five times TK was ‘mommed’ by one of the amazing women in his life; plus one time he put their lessons to use for another.)

I know it’s been a bit since I posted a chapter of the “mom fic” but here is Andrea’s chapter, set post ice storm. I’m slowly but surely working my way through WIP’s and wanted to wrap up this one. I’ve loved working on it, and hope to have the final chapter up sooner rather than later. Thanks as always to @marjansmarwani and @lire-casander for the help and support on this chapter. 

He shivered as he woke. His body ached, shaking under the too thin hospital blankets. No – ICU blankets – that covered him. He groaned a bit as he opened his eyes, taking in the sterile surroundings. He’d been there awhile, from what everyone kept telling him. But he only knew of the last day and a half. The rest, he wouldn’t know. And, from what Carlos and Nancy kept saying, maybe he didn’t want to.

Considering how awful he still felt, he didn’t want to really think about how he had been worse. He couldn’t imagine it being worse than this. As it was, he felt like shit. His whole body ached, in that heavy almost leaden way. He felt like the bed could swallow him up, and, he wasn’t sure he would mind that too much right now.

He felt horrible.

He had since he woke up really. He was exhausted, hurting, and so fucking cold.  

He’d been able to mask it when he was with others, especially Carlos. He’d seen the anxiety on the other man’s face, felt the tension as they clung to each other, and practically heard every stuttered breath as he watched over the bed. It made it easier to pretend he was fine. That he wasn’t feeling as wrung out. That he was fine. When he really wasn’t.

“Mr. Strand?”

He startled at the overly loud voice in the room. He glanced up to see a nurse fluttering around the room. Her movements made him dizzy, forcing him to close his eyes and breath deeply through his nose. He coughed some, jarring his busted ribs and sore chest. “Mr. Strand? Are you listening?”

“TK,” he mumbled, trying to breathe through the nausea that started to creep up on him. “Please. It’s just TK.” He trembled as she worked, wincing a little at the pain creeping up on him all the more.

Continued on AO3

#tarlos #tarlos fanfic #tk strand #carlos reyes #gwyn morgan #andrea reyes #911 lone star #911 lone star fanfiction #911 lone star fanfic #tk whump #moviegeek03 fanfiction

[quackquackcey]

Ch. 19: Hedgehogs, Honey, & Hazelnut-Covered Strawberries

Written for @hdcandyheartsfest day 19 prompt: surprise. 671 words. Many thanks to my beta @wqtson​! 💛

Start from beginning on AO3 here, or click the #fic: HHHS tag.

Summary:

A chance meeting—or is it a setup?—leads to the start of a relationship filled with buttery baked goods, sweet smelling flowers, and hedgehogs.~ 🌹🦔

“What’s with all this secrecy?” asked Harry with a laugh as he let Draco lead him around with a blindfold over his eyes. “Even I didn’t make you wear a blindfold when I gave you those tickets for your birthday.”

‘Those tickets.’

Harry said it so nonchalantly, as if it was nothing, but it meant everything to Draco, and he’d quite literally cried when Harry gave them to him over a lovely dinner at a French restaurant, much to Harry’s surprise.

Tickets to the Seoul Dessert Fair in Korea, and not just any Dessert Fair—a huge, international one whose theme this year ‘just happened’ to be strawberries, Draco’s favourite fruit, featuring a plethora of strawberry-centric desserts from both professionals and baking students.

‘Just happened,’ his arse.

Draco held no doubt in mind that Harry had somehow pulled some strings.

Thus, he’d wanted to give Harry something just as amazing for his birthday, and after wracking his brain for days on end, he’d finally come up with a very risky but hopefully very successful idea for a gift.

Which led to now.

Harry sniffed the air. “Wait, where are we? It smells like my flower shop.”

“Shh, it’s supposed to be a surprise,” whispered Draco—he felt that if he spoke any louder, his voice might crack from how nervous he was. “Okay, we’re here.”

Harry took off his blindfold and looked around in confusion. “We are in my flower shop! And….” He stared blankly at the door they stood in front of. “The broom cupboard?”

“I, um, hid your gift inside,” murmured Draco as Harry opened the door to reveal, not the cupboard, but a huge room filled with sets of adjustable green chairs and beds along with tattoo equipment and cream walls tastefully decorated with frames of Harry’s tattoo designs as well as dainty floral vines that shimmered like coloured glass, (Neville’s specialty plant.) “I hope you like it. We can change the arrangement and everything as you like, of course, and I bought the basics but thought you might have a preference on tattoo machines and ink, so I was thinking you could pick out which ones you like and I can—”

Harry hugged him so tight Draco thought his ribs might crack.

And then he trembled, face buried in the crook of Draco’s neck, and Draco realised he was crying.

“Are you crying from happiness?” murmured Draco. “Or are you crying from how atrocious my gift is?”

Harry held him close a moment longer before finally drawing back a bit with a sniffle and bright, wet forest eyes.

His next words were not what Draco expected.

“…Why’d you choose to make it here?” asked Harry. “Wouldn’t the old storeroom for my floral supplies be better?”

Draco blinked, and wondered if Harry hated it after all. “Oh, I just— You’ve mentioned how you used to live in a cupboard, and I thought maybe having your dream tattoo shop inside an Extended cupboard would help make new happy memories for you regarding, well, cupboards, but”—he wrung his hands and bit his lip—“I mean, it’s a horrid idea, isn’t it? I’m so sorry, I’ll move it to the old storeroom inst—”

“Draco.” Harry breathed out his name like he was a god. “It’s beyond anything I’ve ever even….” His voice cracked as he cupped Draco’s face and touched their foreheads together. “You’re so…. You don’t understand how much this means to me, Draco. I can’t— I can’t even express—” His voice cracked again, and tears dripped down his cheeks as his eyes swam like pools of everything green and beautiful and thriving in this world.

“Draco, I love you,” he murmured so reverently that Draco’s eyes filled with tears and his heart ached with affection. “So much.”

Draco smiled and laughed—the last time Harry had cupped his face and touched their foreheads together like this was when he’d been slipped Amortentia, and yet, this time was so very different.

This time, it was so real it hurt.

“Happy birthday, Harry.”

#hdcandyheartsfest2023 #drarry #drarry fic #omf writes #fic: HHHS #harry x draco #drarry fanfic #hpdm #harry/draco #draco malfoy #harry potter

[miscelunaaa]

Hey author,

Give yourself a try is one of my favourite Yoon fics ever. There's very little representation of us non skinny girls in fan fic. Thank you for this. I may have re read this fic front to back at least 25 times. And I keep coming back to it.

Coming to my ask, idk if you've answered this already, if you have, please ignore me. My question was, is there a possibility that you will revisit this couple and their story? What they're upto now? Etc?

Lots of love,

🎈

Ah! Hello!

My apologies for likely getting to this super super late. I haven't been around much for a variety of reasons, and it's mostly because my last month, and specifically this last week, have been extremely difficult personally. I'm dealing, I'm here, but that's really all I can say for myself most days.

I have actually thought about revisiting them, which I'll admit is a little unusual for me. Normally when I'm done with a fic, I'm truly done with it. I tend to approach stories in a sort of completionist way, in that they need to have all the loose ends tied up, and I do my best to make that happen. For example, I feel no need to continue Sacrificial, nor will I ever revisit the characters in things like Sodium Vapor or No Shade in the Shadow. Those stories are done, and while I think about them from time to time, there's nothing more their stories have to give.

But the god damn GYAT couple ............ There are some loose ends there, and I do have some things kind of sitting in the back of the fridge getting kind of weird with time.

Tbh I almost don't want to say that they're back there. I don't want to give you any false hope about something coming at all. I'm feeling a bit creatively wrung out, recently, and this week hasn't helped that front at all. I'm too mired in my shit to really even pour myself into something; I'm just trying to let myself feel what I need to feel so I can move on.

But that said, I also can't ever say "never"! I've had the idea for ages now and it is something I feel inclined to put out there whenever it comes to fruition! I just don't know when that will be.

I means the world to me that GYAT is one of your favorites. Soft bodies are good bodies and they deserve more representation in stories that see to the emotions of the people who want to read to them. On that front, I do have more stories here and there, and there are some in my recs here and in my bookmarks on AO3. It bears mentioning that everything I write was written to be as inclusive of different body sizes as possible, even if it's not specifically written with a fat reader-insert in mind!

I'm glad to have given you a story that brings you comfort and joy!! Thank you for writing in :) it means the world to me.

#asksss #theuselessdaydreamingidiot #fic:gyat #thank you for loving my nonsense it truly makes my day better to hear you do! #connecting through stories is my kink

[ailendolin]

error 404: [character] refuses to admit they’re sick.

For my beloved Ho-Tan, pls 💕

It took a month but here is your ficlet, dear! 💙 Since we talked about Choop not getting enough love in fics a while ago, I thought I'd make him the second main character here. I hope you like what I came with!

Next up:

First Kiss - Robin/Julian

oh no: [character] gets sick at the worst possible moment. - Bill Shakespeare

The Captain comforting Kitty

The Paynes & Archibald going to Ennythingos

so dramatic: [character] complains about their cold. - Humphrey

Ask Games are here & here. Filled prompts are here & here on AO3.

________

Packing

Error 404: [Ho-Tan] refuses to admit they’re sick.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Ho-Tan looked up but did not stop folding the shirt she was holding. “Packing.”

Choop raised one of his bushy eyebrows at her, clearly unhappy with that answer. “You should be in bed. Resting.”

“I’m feeling much better already,” Ho-Tan said, sniffled and turned away from him. “And you know how Vex is: if I don’t do the packing we’ll leave tomorrow with nothing but the clothes on our backs.”

She reached for another shirt. Without warning, the world went dark around the edges of her vision and she had to steady herself on the bedpost and wait for the dizziness to pass. When she opened her eyes again, she was surprised to find Choop standing at her side. He gently took the shirt out of her hand. “Sit, Ho-Tan.”

With a sigh, she did as he asked and watched in silence as Choop folded the shirt – a little more messily than she would have done it but still with obvious care – and put it in the suitcase. Then he sat down next to her and put a blissfully cool hand against her forehead. “You’re still running a fever.”

“I feel fine,” Ho-Tan insisted. The words sounded weak and hollow even to her own ears.

“So you keep saying,” Choop said softly. “No one will be angry with you for falling ill, Ho-Tan. You know that, don’t you?”

Ho-Tan glanced down at her sock-clad feet.

“We’ve been planning this trip for over a month,” she said at last. “Everyone’s been looking forward to visiting the Youngers. I – I don’t want to ruin that.”

Choop’s face softened. “You’re not ruining anything–“

“Of course I am,” Ho-Tan said, letting her head hang. More softly, she added, “I always do.”

Choop was quiet for a very long moment.

“Did your parents tell you that?” he asked her at last.

Ho-Tan blinked against the sudden stinging in her eyes. “Does it matter? We’ll go visit the Youngers tomorrow just as planned and everyone will be happy. End of story.”

She wrung her hands in her lap, desperate for something to focus on just so she wouldn’t have to look at Choop and see the disappointment in his eyes or, even worse, the pity.

“It matters,” Choop said patiently and took her restless hands in his, “because you matter, Ho-Tan. You matter so much, and we want you to be happy too.”

“I am,” Ho-Tan managed to choke out.

“Are you?” Choop asked quietly. “Because from where I stand, you look mostly exhausted.”

Ho-Tan let her shoulders fall. “The Youngers –“

“Will come to us tomorrow,” Choop told her gently. One of the corners of his mouth twitched into a smile. “We’ve already arranged everything.”

“You have?” Ho-Tan breathed. She’d never wanted anyone to make such a fuss about her cold but the amount of relief she felt for not having to travel across Yonderland was so overwhelming that the tears she’d fought so hard to keep at bay this whole time finally welled over.

“Oh, my dear,” Choop murmured and pulled her into his arms. “It’s quite all right. Just let it out.”

She cried into his shoulder until she had no more tears left. When the others came into her room and settled down around her, Ho-Tan closed her eyes and allowed herself to be held and comforted by them too.

“It’s all right,” Choop whispered again. He pressed a kiss against her temple that tickled her skin. “We’re here.”

“Thank you,” Ho-Tan whispered, heartfelt.

The others simply tightened their hold.

#scribe elder ho tan #chief elder choop #the elders #yonderland #my fic #ask #ask game #ask game prompt ficlet

[clumsyclifford]

hello bella’s ask box it’s been a min damn.

so the vibes are fucking everywhere w the music in the lab today so i’ve mostly been ignoring it but then unforgettable by thomas rhett started playing and my brain was immediately like This Is a Fic Song

more importantly it is a Bella Fic Song

last time you not so subtly wanted me to prompt u w w thomas rhett song you told me to do that here so i am back again w another song from ur boy

okay i def snuck out just to send this so i gotta go now but this felt important laksdjdld

ok ily bye 💛

hi sam :)

so.................... i was stuck on what to write you for your birthday fic. you sent me this ask prompting me with a thomas rhett song that i had literally been meaning to write a fic based on for almost a full year. the puzzle pieces just aligned REALLY nicely on this one.

happy birthday, my love. there's gonna be a LOT more sappy shit in the ao3 notes, but please know that my life is irreversibly changed for the better because i met you. i am dangerous close to sounding like glinda from wicked and i really want you to get to READ this fic so please see ao3 for more schmaltz. i love you so much.

tw for alcohol

read here on ao3

-

Every life has a moment that imprints on memory like ink on a fresh page. The kind of moment that permanently alters the trajectory of that life, that marks the ending of one chapter and the beginning of another. Some people are lucky enough to have more than one. Some people’s minds are laden with crystallized memories. But there’s always at least one. One completely unforgettable moment.

For Jack, this moment happens twenty-four minutes after he enters the club.

Twenty-three minutes after he enters the club, Zack returns with his and Jack's second beers and says, "There's some guy at the bar who's totally your type."

"Yeah?" Jack cranes his neck, but he can't quite see the bar from where he is. "My type how? Not just 'lonely and drunk,' right? My standards have gotten higher, you know."

Zack hands Jack his beer. "He's cute and he's wearing a One Direction shirt, and I'm pretty sure he's drinking a margarita.”

"Oh shit," Jack says. "That checks all my boxes."

"I know it does," says Zack, winner of the Wingman Of The Decade award. He claps Jack on the shoulder. Jack sidesteps people until he gets eyes on the bar and scans for a cute guy in a One Direction shirt drinking a margarita.

Twenty-four minutes after Jack enters the bar, he sees Alex.

And everything changes forever.

*

"Woah," Jack says. His gut is feeling weird and it’s probably unrelated to the beer and a half under his belt.

"What?"

"The guy at the bar," Jack says, grabbing Zack's arm. "Zack. You grossly undersold my future husband to me."

"Your future husband?" Zack sounds amused, but Jack isn't kidding.

"Remember this moment," he says seriously, giving Zack a sloppy pat on the bicep before moving away from him, towards the bar, towards the cute guy with the One Direction shirt who's making Jack understand clairvoyance. "Remember this so you can tell the story at our wedding!"

"Your wedding," Zack repeats.

"Our fucking wedding!" Jack insists, more loudly as space and drunk people fill the growing gap between him and Zack. Zack just gives him a good-luck-and-godspeed wave.

Seconds later, Jack is at the bar.

"Can I buy you a drink?"

The cute guy in question looks up, surprised. Jack practically reels. It's a miracle people aren't flocking to this guy; he's not just cute, he's gorgeous. Bleach-blond hair — clearly from a bottle, which somehow Jack finds more attractive — flops over his forehead in a stubborn commitment to the emo fringe that died out a decade ago, and long lashes frame brown eyes that rival the glossy chestnut color of the bar. Add the five o'clock shadow and the sharply angled jaw and Jack's speechless.

Fortunately it's not his turn to speak. "I have a drink," says the guy, who is rapidly progressing from Cute Guy At Bar to Possible Soulmate At Bar. He quirks a smile. Jack's done for. "I'll buy you a drink, though."

Jack sets his partially-drunk beer on the bar top and slides it as far as he can reach. "Okay," he says.

Possible Soulmate laughs. He slides his margarita away from him, too, pushing it into the space of another person sitting down the bar. "Touché. Okay, you can buy me a drink."

"Well, hey, I don't want you to waste yours," Jack says reasonably. He retrieves his beer and then Possible Soulmate's drink. "I'll get the next one."

Possible Soulmate smiles. Jack is going to need his name eventually. "I appreciate your commitment to environmentally-friendly consumption of alcohol."

Jack blinks. "Yeah," he says. "That was a lot of big words, but sure. No problem. I'm Jack, by the way."

"Alex." Alex. Jack can see the wedding invites now.

"Nice to meet you," Jack says. "I like your shirt."

Alex glances down out of instinct as the wide collar of the shirt slips over his shoulder. "Thanks," he says with a chuckle, and looks up at Jack. "I like yours."

With great effort, Jack tears his gaze from Alex's shoulder and the hint of collarbone peeking out, but he would like it on the record that it is tremendously difficult. Fortunately he already knows what shirt he's wearing because he'd agonized over it for several minutes longer than Zack's patience ran, shortly before going out.

"Yeah, Kurt Cobain," he says, nodding with probably too much enthusiasm. "I'm a lead singer guy."

"Really?" Alex tilts his head and raises an eyebrow. "Meaning what?"

"I go for the lead singer types," Jack explains. "Kurt Cobain, Billie Joe Armstrong, you know." He nods at Alex's shirt. "Harry Styles."

"Harry Styles wasn't—" Alex breaks off and snorts. "Eh, whatever. Who cares."

"Wait," Jack says. "Hold the phone. Did you fucking cross out Zayn's face?"

Alex looks down at his shirt again like maybe he'll have forgotten what it looks like. "Oh, my friend did that. But now the shirt is factually accurate."

"If you wanted an accurate shirt you'd have to cross them all out since none of them are in the band anymore," Jack observes.

Alex slowly smiles. "I guess."

"I always liked Zayn," Jack says wistfully. "His solo shit is so good, though."

"It's good," Alex says, kind of in the tone of voice of someone who doesn't really agree but doesn't want to get into it, so Jack leaves it be. They can poll their wedding guests. "I'm really digging Niall's solo shit."

"That's an extremely acceptable answer," Jack says, nodding vigorously. In the moment it slips his mind that he's holding a beer and the liquid begins to slosh out of its container. "Oh shit, fuck, sorry."

"Didn't get me," Alex says, passing Jack a napkin. "Couple too many, I get it."

"What?" Jack is very focused on drying his hands so they don't get sticky and gross. "I'm not drunk."

Alex laughs. "Yeah, right."

"I'm not!"

"Okay," Alex says lightly, but it's clear he doesn't believe Jack. On the bright side, he doesn't seem bothered by it.

"I am acceptably drunk for a guy in his mid-twenties at a club,” Jack amends. "And you owe me a drink anyway."

"Hey, I intend to buy you that drink," Alex says earnestly. "Another beer?"

Jack shakes his head. "Vodka soda," he says. "It's a special occasion."

"Really! You celebrating something?"

"I am now," Jack says. "Celebrating meeting my future husband."

"Your future husband?"

"You," Jack says, in case it wasn't clear. "It's not every day you meet the man you're gonna marry. I think it calls for a celebratory vodka soda."

Alex stares, obviously expecting Jack to say sike! When Jack does no such thing, he gives a small, incredulous laugh.

"Fair enough," he says. He sounds like he's humoring Jack. That's okay. Jack is serious, but Alex will figure that out on his own time. "I guess you're not wrong. That doesn't happen every day."

A large shadow materializes on Alex's other side, blocking light like some very cliché movie villain. It's not Doc Ock, but it is some tall, burly guy, a leer affixed to his face that's probably been there since Alex's haircut went out of style.

"Hey, baby," he says in an unnervingly deep voice. The part of Jack that isn't super skeezed out is a little jealous. But Burly Guy isn't talking to Jack; Jack may as well be invisible. To Alex, Burly Guy says, "Saw you across the bar and I just had to come over."

Didn't have to, Jack thinks grumpily to himself. You could have stayed across the bar. If you walk away now we’ll pretend we never saw you.

"Can I get you a drink?" Burly Guy asks, and honestly, Jack has no idea what Alex is going to say.

Big Burly Guy with a deep voice a la Morgan Freeman vs. resident beanstalk Jack whose voice sounds like a rejected cartoon character design. What a tough choice.

Jack is just preparing to cut his losses when Alex grabs Jack's wrist, turns to him, and says, "Honey? What do you think?"

Jack's tipsy, but Alex is definitely communicating something with his eyes, and between that and the pet name Jack is pretty sure he's on the same page.

"You want to buy my boyfriend a drink?" Jack asks Big Burly Guy, cranking up the Bitchy energy because he doesn't get to do it a lot and it's kinda fun. His voice has definitely gone vaguely southern-auntie, but he's rolling with it. "Sorry, sugar, this seat's taken. Must be this guy" — he points at himself — "to ride."

"This guy?" Burly Guy echoes, furrowing his eyebrows at Jack and then looking at Alex with profound confusion, like he just doesn't get it. "You're with this guy?"

"Happily," Alex says, glancing back at Jack, who offers him what is definitely a convincingly enamored smile because Jack is legitimately enamored. Alex laces their fingers together and Jack's not delusional, can't be, not when they fit this well together. No way. "So I'm gonna pass on that drink. Sorry, man. No hard feelings."

Burly Guy seems to have some hard feelings. Maybe he didn't get the memo. "Whatever," he says gruffly. "Your loss."

Jack can't resist countering, "Actually it's your loss, sweetums," as Burly Guy retreats. If he dies tonight, he knows who’s responsible.

As soon as he's gone, Alex breaks down laughing, and Jack quickly follows suit. Alex's hand slips from Jack's and begins to tug at the ends of his own hair instead.

"Sugar?"

"I don't know what happened," Jack says/wheezes. "I became possessed by Blanche from Golden Girls.”

"You have to be" — Alex prods Jack's chest — "this guy to ride." He dissolves into giggles and Jack is laughing too but mostly because Alex's laugh is incredibly contagious.

"Look, I don't blame him," Jack says, feeling exhilarated. "You are the best-looking guy in this establishment. He just happened to have creepo vibes."

"I am not the best-looking guy in this establishment," Alex says, grinning at Jack. "Nice of you to say, though."

"Hey, I'm serious!"

"I thought you were Jack."

Jack stares at Alex and Alex doesn't even last a second before he's breaking down laughing yet again.

I'm going to marry you, Jack thinks, and it almost scares him how serious he is about that. He opens his mouth and says, "That wasn't even— that's not even one of the good dad jokes! That's the most boring one!"

"There is no such thing as a boring dad joke."

"You should go into stand-up," Jack says dryly. "You'd tear down the house with this set. I can see it now." He waves a grandiose hand in the air as if painting the marquee into existence, but when he goes to introduce the act he realizes he's missing most of the crucial information. "Alex…something…something. Austin, Texas, one night only."

"Gaskarth," Alex says. "That's my last name."

"Alex Something Gaskarth," Jack loyally amends, and gives Alex a look like, well?

Except Alex is giving Jack that same look. "I only know your first name and you expect me to tell you my full one?"

"Jack Bassam Barakat," Jack says, gesturing impatiently. "Come on, I'm trying to introduce your act here."

"Guess," Alex says.

"Guess?"

"It's a pretty basic middle name," Alex says. "I'll buy you your vodka soda when you guess it."

"Alex," Jack says. "I am not going to guess your middle name. I am so bad at these games and I'm fucking drunk."

"Quitter," Alex says. "Do you want your drink?"

Jack scowls, trying to channel Blanche again, but Alex is apparently immune.

"Give me a hint," he finally concedes.

"It's a British name," Alex says. “Pretty standard British.”

"Are you British?”

Alex nods. "Born and raised. Moved here when I was about…eight? But I'm not an American citizen. I have a green card."

Yet another reason they should be married. Jack could extend his citizenship to Alex. Plus he'd gain British citizenship, which would probably be useful for, like, travel or One Direction stalking or whatever.

"That's sick," Jack says. "I was born in Lebanon. We moved when I was a baby."

"That's so cool," Alex says, sounding genuinely interested. He props his chin on his hand and gives Jack a cheeky smile. "Now guess."

Jack sighs. "Uh, Charles."

"No."

"Darcy."

"Darcy?"

"Margaret."

"Jack."

"You said it's a British name!"

"A British man's name," Alex says, rolling his eyes in fond exasperation.

Jack takes a long pull from his beer, swallows, and says, "Harry."

"No."

They're going to be here awhile. Jack pulls out the seat next to Alex and settles in while he racks his brain for British names.

*

“Alfred.”

“Nope.”

“John.”

“No.”

“Paul.”

“No.”

“George.” Alex shakes his head. “Ringo.”

“Yup, you finally got it,” Alex says. Jack is over the moon for a split second before it sinks in that Alex is fucking with him. “Alex Ringo Gaskarth. Well done.”

“Fuck off, I’m doing my best here,” Jack says.

“You’re missing one incredibly obvious name,” Alex says. “It’s not that hard.”

“For you,” Jack says. “Because you already know it.” Alex is grinning. Jack likes that he’s enjoying himself. It makes this guessing game fun. Under any other circumstances, this guessing game would not be fun, but Alex makes it fun.

Alex has also finished his mango margarita by now, and Jack’s beer is long since empty. He’s itching for another drink, mainly for something to do with his hands.

As if reading his mind, Alex flags down the bartender, who sidles up with a small smile and says, “What can I get you boys?”

Jack blinks at her. Mostly at her accent, which is not American.

“Vodka soda,” Alex says. To Jack, “I think you’ve earned it.” Jack smiles.

“And a mango margarita,” he puts in to the bartender, “and are you British?”

The bartender looks amused. “I am British,” she says.

“Please help me,” Jack says. “Alex says his middle name is a British name and I cannot for the life of me figure out what it fucking is.”

“Jack, the nice bartender lady has other things to do,” Alex says with a laugh. The nice bartender lady probably does have other things to do, but she shifts her weight and gives Alex an appraising look instead.

“Harry?”

“Tried that,” Jack says, realizing at once that this is a pointless endeavor. The nice bartender lady is going to guess everything Jack’s already guessed and he’ll just have wasted her time. “I’ve tried every member of One Direction, every member of the Beatles, every member of Oasis, every Harry Potter character, every member of the Royal Family—”

At this, Alex coughs conspicuously.

Jack rounds on him. “I have.”

“Edward,” the bartender offers. Alex’s lips are pressed together in a smile and he shakes his head. “Meghan. Kate. Richard. Dick. Philip.”

A lightbulb goes off as the bartender is listing Royal Family names. Jack wants to kick himself. “Oh my— William?”

“Yeahhhh, there you go! See, it was easy,” Alex says, grinning widely.

“William,” the bartender repeats with a charming little laugh. Her lipstick is bright with clean lines, an impressive feat considering Jack has seen her bustling around this bar for almost an hour now. “I had an ex called William.”

“Oh no,” Alex says. “I hope he didn’t ruin the name for you.”

“Please,” the bartender says, waving him off. “The only thing he ruined for me was a few meters of drywall.” Jack and Alex must have twin looks of concern, because she explains, “Anger issues. No worries, boys, I sent him packing, and a vodka soda for you, and a mango marg for you.”

She slides their drinks into waiting hands and starts to turn away. “Wait a sec,” Jack says.

The bartender turns back to him with wide Bambi eyes. “Did I fuck up the drink? I’ve made it a million—”

“No no no,” Jack assures her. “I just wanted to know your name. You rescued me from an eternal guessing game, you’re my hero.”

The bartender smiles and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. “Maisie,” she says. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, Maisie,” Alex says. “Thank you for the alcohol.”

Maisie laughs again as she moves to the other side of the bar.

“William,” Jack says, swirling his drink with the miniature straw. “God damn. I can’t believe I missed William.”

“You got close,” Alex says. “You guessed Liam twice. And thanks for the drink.”

“Same to you,” Jack says. “It’s a good drink. Yours, I mean. You know what offends me, though? Why aren’t mango margaritas orange?”

Alex furrows his brow. “Why the fuck would they be orange?”

“Mangos are orange! Fruity drinks should be the same color as their fruit.”

“Mangos are not fucking orange,” Alex says with an incredulous laugh. “They’re straight-up yellow.”

“They’re orange with yellow tendencies,” Jack says, “but mostly orange.”

“They are entirely yellow,” Alex says. “Coldplay even wrote a song about them. They were all yellow.”

“They’re orange,” Jack insists, but now Alex has moved on completely and is loudly singing Coldplay.

“I came along! I wrote a song foooor youuuuu! And all the things you do!”

“You’re ignoring the truth!”

“And it was called ‘Yellow’!” Alex shouts.

“Okay, I surrender! Sheesh. You win.”

“Thank you,” Alex says placidly, like he hasn’t just been yelling obnoxiously over the (worse, but much louder) club music. “I’m going to enjoy my yellow mango marg very much.”

“And I will enjoy my victory drink,” Jack says, lifting his glass. Alex lifts his. It smells like mango and tequila. They clink the rims together. “To William.”

“To William,” Alex agrees, laughing.

*

The DJ plays a song Jack loves to hate from hearing it on the radio so many times and Alex is out of his seat before Jack’s managed to put down his drink.

“What are—”

“I love this song, I want to dance,” Alex insists. The implication is clearly that he wants Jack to dance with him, which is like. What is Jack gonna do, say no?

Alex must anticipate some kind of argument, though, because with a glint in his eye he adds lightly, “These are the kinds of things you’ll have to do if we’re married.”

On the one hand, he’s clearly making fun. But on the other hand, the fact that Alex was a stranger an hour ago and is still comfortable teasing Jack about suggesting they’re going to get married speaks volumes. Alex is smiling. They’ve known each other for less than an hour — a drink and a half each — and Alex is smiling at his own joke about marrying Jack. Like he likes that Jack said it first. Like he likes Jack.

“Just wait ‘til you learn all the weird shit you’ll have to do when we’re married,” Jack says, sliding out of his stool.

Any sane person would have run away by now. Even Jack knows when he’s coming on too strong.

But Alex does the opposite; Alex grabs his wrist and pulls him towards the dance floor.

“Fair warning,” Alex says. “I don’t actually know how to dance.”

“I’ll be the judge of that,” Jack says, and then eats his words not two seconds later when Alex demonstrates how very much he doesn’t know how to dance. All of his limbs seem to move as their own entities, zero synchronization. A couple surrounding people take various minor assaults before taking the hint and giving Alex some space, but this does not stop him. “Okay,” Jack says loudly over the music. “You were right. But luckily neither do I.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” Alex says.

Jack does the sprinkler. Alex snorts. He does the wave, very poorly, and Alex continues it, also very poorly.

“Mr. Moves,” Alex says. “I’m impressed.”

“Yeah? Check this one out.” Jack does the running man with extreme focus. Alex laughs, leaning towards Jack as he does. Jack stops dancing so he doesn’t accidentally hit Alex, who is suddenly much closer and who somehow smells like pine and flannel and fall and winter in one and is the best-looking person in blue jeans and checkered Vans on this dance floor. Far from the only person, but without question the prettiest.

Fuck.

“I don’t think I can do that one,” says Alex, grinning. Jack nods at him like, try it, so Alex does, proving himself right. He almost takes Jack’s eye out.

“Yeesh, okay, you’re— alright, take it easy,” Jack says, swatting Alex’s wayward hand away and laughing. “Well, we all have our strengths.”

Surrendering the running man, Alex starts up with some bizarre hand-wavey foot-kicky thing, singing along to the music.

“Do you seriously like this song?” Jack asks, attempting to imitate Alex’s dance. “Dance,” heavy quote marks implied.

Alex shoots Jack a look. “Hell yeah. What, you don’t?”

“It’s just…always on,” Jack says. “Everywhere. How are you not sick of it?”

“Because it fuckin’ slaps!” Alex looks incensed.

“I don’t know why I’m surprised you’re a pop music person when you’re literally in a One Direction shirt.”

“I’m a lots of music person,” Alex counters. “Including pop music, yeah. You don’t like pop music?”

“I sometimes do,” Jack says. “I like Taylor Swift. Britney Spears.”

“Okay, well, you’d have to be insane not to like them.”

“Yeah, and I’m obviously sane.”

Alex barks a laugh. “Drunk but sane.”

“I am not drunk!” That’s probably a lie by now.

“You’re not convincing me otherwise,” Alex says. “I’m confident you’ve been drunk this whole time.”

“You haven’t exactly been an innocent bystander,” Jack says. “You bought me a drink, and you’re gonna buy us shots in a minute.”

“I did— I what?”

“Yeah,” Jack says, and this time he drags Alex off the dance floor, back to the bar. “I can see the future, I forgot to tell you.”

“You—” Alex laughs again and leans on the bar, trapping both his elbows between his stomach and the bartop. “You’re buying the next round.”

“Oh, happily,” Jack says. “I’m actively trying to get you drunk.”

“Why’s that?”

“Studies show I am 75% more attractive to people when they’re drunk,” says Jack.

Alex turns to him. Without missing a beat, he says smoothly, “I don’t think it’s possible for you to get any more attractive.”

Fuck. Actually, fuck. Seriously. Fuck.

“You must be drunk already, then,” Jack says.

Alex smiles serenely. “I feel pretty sober.”

“Exactly what a drunk person would say,” Jack says. “J’accuse, William.”

Alex laughs. “In that case, your studies are right.”

Jack’s probably blushing. He does that in extreme cases only, but this is nothing if not an extreme case. Alex is fucking relentless.

Maisie the bartender is back, and Alex orders them shots of tequila. Somewhere in the recesses of Jack’s mind, this unlocks a memory, and he snaps his fingers. “I should hunt down my friend, he loves tequila.”

“Friend?” Alex looks around while Maisie pours their shots. “You ditched your friend?”

“He told me to,” Jack says. “He’s probably gonna pick up some girl. Actually, he probably already has.”

“Really,” Alex says, sounding amused.

“Zack’s a strong silent type,” Jack explains. “Emphasis on strong. We’re single guys in our mid-twenties, Alex. We’re not going to clubs for the atmosphere.”

“Admit it,” Alex says. “You a little bit are.”

Jack bites his lip. “Fine, I like the atmosphere,” he admits, more affected than he should be that Alex seems to have picked up on this about him. “And the alcohol. And the chances I’ll meet my future husband, which clearly paid off. Zack will never admit it, but I’m pretty sure he likes trying to set me up with random people in clubs.”

Alex laughs. “He set you up with me?”

“Oh yeah,” Jack says. “He wingmanned me hard. You can thank him in your vows.”

This only serves to make Alex laugh harder. “I’ll thank him now,” he says with a grin. Taking his cue, Jack grabs his shot glass. Alex does the same. “To Zack.”

“To Zack!” Jack cheers, and they both down their shots.

“Me?”

Jack whirls around and trips straight into Zack. “Zack!” he says brightly. “We toasted you.”

“I heard,” Zack says. “Why, exactly?”

“I’m Alex,” says Alex, holding out a hand. Zack shakes it. “Apparently you set us up?”

“Oh,” Zack says. “I wouldn’t really say that. I just kind of pointed Jack in this direction. If you can put up with him, that’s all you.”

“I was gonna come find you anyway,” Jack says. “We’re doing tequila shots. Next round on me.”

“Oh, hell yeah,” Zack says. “Count me in.”

They can’t come up with a toast for their second round so they just knock it back with an ambiguous cheer; then Zack offers to buy another, and Jack’s not about to refuse. It’s starting to hit just right, so he’s buzzed but not incoherent. All his most brilliant ideas come in this state.

Case in point: as Maisie is pouring them their third round, Jack suddenly says, “Maisie! Do a shot with us!”

Maisie looks up and laughs. “I’m not supposed to drink on the job,” she says.

“It’s not drinking, it’s bonding,” Jack insists.

“Yeah, we’re forming lasting friendships,” Alex jumps in.

Zack looks entertained. “You guys know each other?”

“As of half an hour ago, yes,” Maisie says.

“Maisie here helped me guess Alex’s middle name,” Jack explains. “Which is William. Like the prince.”

“I feel like I missed so much,” Zack says, half to himself. He shrugs and nods at Maisie. “One shot. On me. For Jack. We won’t tell.”

Maybe it’s because Zack is buff and has cool tattoos or just has good vibes or whatever, but Maisie hesitates only a second before inclining her head. “Just one, and no blabbing,” she says, meeting all of their eyes in turn. Everyone nods solemnly, and Maisie discreetly pours herself a fourth shot.

“Hell yes!” Jack whoops as they all take a shot glass. “To Maisie!”

“To Maisie!” Everyone echoes, including Maisie with a wry grin.

The third shot goes down smoother than the first two. Jack swallows his easily, as does Alex. Maisie puckers her face a bit. Zack has zero reaction, because Zack’s just kinda like that.

“While I’m here, I was hoping to get another beer,” Zack says.

“On it,” Maisie says immediately, giggling. “Thanks for the shot, boys. You’ve kept me far more entertained tonight than my usual shift provides.”

“You can give a toast at our wedding,” Jack says to her. Zack’s eyes widen a little, Alex snorts, and Maisie laughs.

“I’d be honored,” she says. “Back to work now. You need anything, let me know.”

“Seriously, Jack?”

“What?” Jack gives Zack an innocent smile. He pats Zack on the cheek. “Don’t worry, sugar, you can give a toast too.”

Alex laughs. Zack stares at him and shakes his head. “You’re insane,” he says, but he says that roughly twice a day so he’s still below his quota. “I’ll leave you two alone. Come find me when you wanna go. If…” He eyes Alex. “...Just…yeah.”

And with these eloquent words, he disappears with his beer into the crowd.

“I like him,” Alex announces.

“Me too,” Jack says. He turns back to Alex. “Back to the dance floor?”

“Get out of my brain,” Alex says. “I’d like to see your drunken running man.”

“It is gonna blow your fucking mind,” Jack promises, and Alex laughs again.

*

They’re not even being gross like everyone else. Alex has pulled Jack into an exaggerated tango performed mostly with missteps when it happens: someone shoves them aside as they walk past, and Alex loses his balance and falls into Jack, who just barely manages to catch them both. He doesn’t manage to stop his arm from winding around Alex’s waist. To be fair, he doesn’t try very hard.

Jack’s first thought is homophobe, but then he spots the offender, lumbering off with heavy footfalls, and it’s Burly Guy from earlier. The guy who tried and failed to pick Alex up.

All of this registers as Alex slowly regains his footing. “Damn, who pissed in that dude’s Cheerios?”

“It’s the guy from before who tried to buy you a drink,” Jack says, pointing at his back.

Alex whips his head around. “Seriously? Asshole.”

Jack chooses not to observe that from his vantage point, being shoved close together is hardly a dick move. In intent, sure, but not in actuality; Jack’s enjoying the proximity a great deal. Like, a lot.

Like, his hand is still on Alex’s hip, subtly keeping Alex close, and Alex has his arm around Jack’s shoulders from their dance and he’s not moving, either.

“Yeah,” Jack says. They’d already been on the outskirts and now they’re off to the side of everyone, wallflowers.

Alex breathes a laugh and looks back at Jack. He doesn’t step back or even lean away, even though their faces are too close to be friendly now. Jack hadn’t really been expecting friendly, but they’ve been tightrope-walking between sides, and if neither of them breaks this up then they’ll be irreversibly left on one end.

Jack has no intention of moving away. He likes this end of the tightrope. For all he cares, they could cut the tightrope and free-fall together.

“You’re pretty good at bad tango-ing,” Alex says, reaching up to brush away the sweaty fringe that’s clinging to his forehead.

Jack grins. “Well, you know what they say. It takes two.”

Alex kisses him so suddenly that Jack almost loses his balance.

*

He tastes like tequila. That’s all Jack gets before they’re not kissing anymore. The room feels quiet and then unforgivably loud the next second, and Alex is flushed and smiling nervously, and Jack is smiling too, not nervous at all.

“Did I tell you I’m in a band?” Alex asks in a rush.

Jack’s brain struggles to keep up. He can’t remember Alex mentioning a band, but he’s also distracted by wanting to kiss Alex again. There’s no understating the power of wanting to kiss someone over failing to clock anything they say. “What?”

“I’m in a band,” Alex says. “Not as a job, just like, for fun.”

“Oh,” says Jack.

“I’m the lead singer,” Alex says, with a flickering look down at Jack’s shirt.

“Oh,” says Jack, because, like, oh. “Can I kiss you again?”

“What, here?” Alex meets his eyes. “With all these people around?”

“You kissed me first,” Jack says. “Let me kiss you and then we can call it even.”

“Okay,” Alex says, and Jack’s kissing him before the word’s really out of his mouth.

And he tastes like tequila and mango and sugar and the color yellow and the sweat of the dance floor and God, it’s good. It’s like kissing a memory, except this memory is still here, not frozen in time, not trapped in an ornate frame. He’s creating a memory that he knows he’ll relive for the rest of his life.

Somehow, though he doesn’t know the end of this chapter, he knows the end of the book.

Alex’s warm palm cradling Jack’s cheek to hold him steady, fingers splayed out like a star; Alex’s other hand grazing skin over the collar of Jack’s shirt. Alex singing Coldplay in Jack’s ear. Alex’s blue jeans and his checkered Vans and his ridiculous One Direction tank top. Alex holding Jack’s hand and calling him honey to get Burly Guy to leave him alone. Grinning as he shoots down guess after guess for the elusive middle name. Laughing at Jack’s stupid dance moves. Knocking back a shot like it’s nothing. Smiling when Jack says they’re going to get married, never moving away, only ever closer.

Alex sitting undisturbed at the bar, ankles crossed, and Jack seeing him from across the room like something out of a goddamn Hallmark movie and just knowing.

He tugs Alex closer but Alex is already pulling away with a smile. “You wanna get out of here?”

“Yeah,” Jack says. He smoothes a hand over a crease in Alex’s shirt and nods. “Taxi’s on me if we go back to your place.”

“Sucker, I was gonna suggest that anyway,” Alex says with a quiet laugh. “You should tell Zack. Don’t wanna just leave him.”

“Don’t worry,” Jack says. “He knows.”

“He knows?”

“Zack and I are brothers in clairvoyance,” Jack says. “How many times do I have to tell you this?”

“I knew you could see the future,” Alex says. “You never told me Zack could, too.”

“Zack can see everyone’s future,” says Jack. “I can only see mine.”

“Yeah? What’s your future look like now?”

Jack filters out several inappropriate comments. It’s hard when Alex is smirking, clearly baiting him. “I told you,” he says. “You, me, vows, rings, the works.”

“Not that future,” Alex says. “I’m talking about the immediate one.”

It takes everything in Jack not to get down on one knee and say so was I. There’s a tilt in Alex’s head, like a dog listening carefully for a familiar sound.

“Honestly?” Jack says, and Alex nods. “I think it’s more fun if we find out together.”

#jack barakat #alex gaskarth #jalex #jalex fic #all time low #atl fic #fic #my fic #sam. i love you #i have wrung out all my love for you in this fic and the ao3 notes and stuff #but i hope you like it #i hope you love it #but ill be happy if you just like it at least #i should relaly go to sleep so i can wake up early again like a smart reasonable person to at least ATTEMPT to get SOME of my work done #sighhhhh #the sacrifices we make #i can't believe yom kippur is so soon and im worrying about homework #hate it here #my one regret is that this song says fourteenth of october not fourteenth of september #missed opportunity on mr rhett's part #bruh i would kill to see him live #anyway #happy birthday my love

[olderthannetfic]

Crit bookmark anon had it mixed up on one point, the rule of thumb is that expecting authors to specify what form of feedback they prefer is rude, burdensome, ableist and so that hurts their feelings too, or that's how it's been explained to me.

Personally, I swear when I got into fanfiction around 1998 concrit was the holy grail of feedback that authors asked for with the desperation of a starving populace, but the vehemence to which people say it’s always been this way, that c+c is c+c+cruel, that authors have never needed to state their preferences, to the point of insulting me is actually beginning to trigger my psychosis and make me doubt my own memories.

It makes me nervous to even read fic anymore because I love expressing my love. People tell me they love my reviews because they're "juicy and detailed" since I do my best to put effort into picking out the parts I really loved around and the parts that confused me (if there were any). They’ll thank me for my feedback, and then they’ll say concrit is cruel actually and discourages authors, is ablist because of the possibility for rejection dysphoria, that what I did wasn’t even actually c+c but all I did was analyze their work and review using the crit sandwich. By the very definition it seems to me to be critique but I have no idea anymore! 

Hell, it even makes me feel insecure as an author. Glaring mistakes get complimented, it’s like someone saying my smile is beautiful while I have a huge hunk of food in my teeth. Like I’m glad you said you liked it but are you lying to me? What are your genuine feelings? If you’re an author, why don’t you want to just post your house rules? Is it because I’m just being intrusive? They say I should ask what the house rules are to be considerate about their feelings, but treat me like as a reader I have none to be considered.

It’s got me wrung up, clearly.

I've tried to encourage people to feel safe with c+c in my comment section and other authors still get mad at me for doing it that way too because it's damaging to them as a writer because I’m doing fanfiction wrong.

Has it always been like this? Am I actually delusional? Please tell me I’m not just going crazy and you’ve been noticing this as a cultural shift too, if I’m alone in this I think I genuinely might be sicker than I thought I was.

--

I don't think it's a clear cultural shift in one direction, but yes, I've noticed things.

I think AO3 culture owes a lot to LJ culture and LJ culture was often less into crit because the fic was so visibly in the author's personal space. A lot of LJ authors also had circles of beta readers and good friends who were quite visible, so concrit from others was superfluous and not so helpful. At the same time, LJ being a blogging platform meant that people could rec in their own journals and include concrit in that context easily. AO3 doesn't have much of a space for meaty reviews, though you can try with bookmarks.

Meanwhile, mailing list culture was often pro-concrit, and so is FFN. Forums are often pro-concrit. Some of these are older spaces, but they're also just different spaces from AO3.

A lot of "changes" are simply a change from being used to some other space to AO3 getting so popular everyone's crowding in there. The old culture persists somewhere else.

--

My own view on concrit of my work is that it doesn't hurt my feelings, but I don't find it useful, so I don't think people should waste their time on it. Good concrit is hard and it takes a while to write up.

Once I post a work, it's as done as it's going to get. Many people who've critiqued me in the past have also just had bad quality advice. I've sat in (non fandom) writing groups filtering the often also very bad advice there, and it's not just ego: I have a pretty good handle on which critiquers know their stuff, and most do not. I have a couple of friends whom I let read my pro writing because they know what I'm going for, and I understand and trust their taste.

Now, if someone wants to critique my finished fic in a review, that's fine by me because even though the work is done and not getting edited again, the pros and cons are worth noting for a future reader.

[drarrily-we-row-along]

Veritaserum Prompt Fic (Part 9)

(It has been a minute since I've posted anything on this fic. Sorry friends-thanks for your patience! If you'd like you can start at the beginning, Part 1 on Tumblr and click through or head over to AO3 to read the whole thing.) ============

One week.

It took one week for Draco to make all of the arrangements; to brew the potion and to get in touch with Granger to make a plan without Harry knowing.

None of it was easy, of course. Harry spent so much time with him that it was hard to have secrets, but Draco couldn't ever find it in himself to complain. If he was a better man maybe it would have gone faster but in the grand scheme of things what was one week against the balance of the rest of his life?

But, as he stirred the potion seven times counter-clockwise and it changed to a dark purple, he knew that his time was up. This was the last piece. He already had the portkey from Granger that would deliver him to her house, she'd drawn up the contract that he would sign when he got there granting Harry immunity, and now the sleeping draught was complete. A few drops in the tea that he was going to make for Harry right before bed and he'd be able to leave.

His heart clenched traitorously and his brain continuously searched for ways to weasel its way out of spending his life in prison. But this was the only way. The only that Harry would have a chance at the life that he deserved after all he'd been through. It wasn't fair for him not to get to enjoy the world he'd saved.

It was time for Draco to do the right thing. For once. He had to, Harry was his now and he had to protect him, he had to do what was best for him. The only way to give Harry his freedom was to give up his own.

"Hey," Harry said, voice warmer than the sunshine on the beach as he wrapped his arms around Draco's waist and buried his face in the side of Draco's neck, interrupting Draco from his thoughts. And Draco's entire soul ached.

(Read more below the cut)

"Hi yourself," he managed, keeping his voice light and cheerful.

He felt Harry grin against his neck, "How are you?" he asked as through they hadn't seen each other a mere hour ago.

"Good," he whispered, pressing back into Harry's arms, because how could he be anything else when Harry was holding him. "Did you finish that table you were building?"

"Mmhmm," he hummed, kissing the spot just behind Draco's ear that made him feel a bit weak in the knees. "I thought maybe we could eat dinner outside."

He nodded, "Let me just tidy up out here first."

"Kay," Harry replied, pressing one more smacking kiss to his neck and making Draco laugh. "I'm going to start grilling the salmon we picked up yesterday, okay?"

He nodded. "I'll be out in a minute."

Harry gave him a wave and then disappeared out of the work room, traipsing through the green house.

Draco took a steadying breath and pulled out a small phial that he filled with the sleeping draught.

Only a few more hours.

---------------

And the hours passed far too quickly, eating dinner, then sitting close to the ocean where the waves could wash over their feet as they drank beer and laughed up at the stars.

"Harry?" he said.

"Mmh?" the other man asked, pressing his shoulder against Draco's.

He gave him a little smile, "This is the happiest I've ever been."

Harry turned his head to look at him and smiled back, "Yeah?"

Draco nodded.

"Me too," he replied, leaning in to kiss him softly.

His heart twisted uncomfortably in his chest, squeezing and wrenching like a wet towel being wrung out. "Love you," he whispered.

He felt Harry's smile as he kissed him, mouth stretched too wide, "I love you, too," he replied.

They sat staring out over the ocean for long moments and Draco knew he had to do it now. If he let the other man take him to bed, if he let Harry tell him how happy he was and how much he loved him, he wouldn't be able to do it.

"Do you want another?" he asked, pointing to Harry's beer. "I'm going to use the loo, I can grab you one while I'm up," he offered.

Harry tilted his head back to look up at him, curls spilling across his face and catching in the breeze. "Maybe a glass of water?"

"Alright," he replied, trying to figure out what he was going to hide the sleeping potion in as he brushed a few curly strands of hair out of Harry's eyes. "Be right back, then."

Harry caught his hand and tipped his head up so he could press a kiss to the inside of Draco's wrist and he felt his eyes well up. It shouldn't be possible to feel this much, shouldn't be possible for a heart to soar and clench at the same time.

He gave Harry's hand a squeeze before releasing him and heading toward the house, taking gasping breaths as he tried to calm down, tried to force the tears and the panic away. Once inside he looked around in the kitchen, water wouldn't mask the taste of the sleeping draught, he needed to find something else.

After a moment, he pulled down the biscuits that they'd baked together the day before, setting a few out on a plate, then pouring a glass of milk that he slipped several drops of the sleeping draught into.

It took him several minutes to work up the nerve, Merlin knew that he'd never been good at being brave; it's what had landed him in the situation in the first place. Squaring his shoulders, he levitated the plate and the glasses of milk, being sure to keep track of which one he'd put the potion into, outside to the beach.

Harry laughed when he saw him, reaching out to pluck the glass of milk closest to him from the air, "You're going to make me fat," Harry said. "And then you won't love me anymore."

Draco shook his head as he sat down next to Harry, leaning over to him to kiss him, "Impossible," he murmured. He cupped Harry's cheek, brushing his thumb over his cheekbone, "There is no possible version of us where I do not fall in love with you."

A pleased grin stretched Harry's mouth wide, "I wouldn't have pegged you as a romantic," he said.

"No?" Draco asked as he picked up one of the cookies.

Harry shook his head, "I would have imagined you having sharp edges still, with practical ways to show your love, not all-" he broke off and gestured to Draco, "soft."

He shrugged one shoulder, "We've had enough sharp, haven't we?" he asked.

"Definitely," Harry agreed, taking a cookie off the plate and dunking it into the milk.

Draco swallowed against the guilt and the desire to just make it all stop.

"These turned out really well," Harry said through a mouthful of cookie. "I can't believe you'd never baked cookies before yesterday."

He smiled, "Lots of firsts here."

The corner of Harry's mouth tipped up and he leaned over to kiss Draco again, soft and sweet. "What should our next first be?" he asked when he pulled back.

"I don't know," Draco replied, watching him dunk his cookie again, the milk soaking it and making a chunk break off and sink to the bottom.

"Drat," Harry said before taking a bite out of the remainder of it. "I've always wanted to take a trip to the states," he said. "And we all know that the Ministry doesn't work well with the one in the states. We probably wouldn't even have to hide."

He hummed, watching as Harry stifled a yawn.

"I want to go to that muggle amusement park," he added.

"Alright," Draco agreed. "We'll go, then."

Harry gave him one of those guileless grins of his before starting to lift the glass of milk to his lips.

"Kiss me," Draco blurted, needing just one more kiss before the end.

The other man obliged him, "Twist my arm," he said with a wink, leaning over and drawing Draco closer, so he could kiss him.

"Sorry," Draco said when they broke apart, "Finish your milk and biscuit."

"Don't be sorry," Harry said, "I will kiss you any time, love. Literally anytime." He drained his glass of milk, making a pleased little hum when he caught the piece of the biscuit he'd lost earlier.

The effects of the potion were immediate, as they always were, Draco watched as Harry's eyes started to droop.

"Merlin," he said through a yawn, "Draco I'm exhausted all of the sudden."

He nodded, "Let's go to bed," he offered, standing up and reaching for Harry's hands.

Harry allowed himself to be tugged to his feet and he stumbled into Draco, his body sinking into him like they'd been made to fit together.

"I've got you," Draco whispered, wrapping his arm around him and holding him for a minute, memorizing the curves of his body and the way they felt pressed together. "Come on," he said after a minute.

"Don't wanna," Harry mumbled against his collarbone. "M'comfortable."

"Bed will be more comfortable," Draco assured him, nudging him toward the house.

"You'll be there, too?"

"Yeah," he whispered, knowing that his heart would live here with the other man, tucked between his ribs next to his own for safe keeping.

He managed to navigate Harry inside and they crawled into bed, Harry curled around him, drawing Harry's back against his chest and holding him.

"Love you," Harry mumbled sleepily.

"I love you too," he managed, throat tight and raw as he clutched Harry tighter and held him impossibly closer. He stayed there for longer than was strictly necessary, Harry's body was lax in his arms, he let out a soft huff snore ever few exhalations, and there wasn't a doubt in Draco's mind that the other man was in a deep sleep.

"Okay," he whispered to himself. "Okay, you've got to get up." He pressed a kiss to the soft skin on the back of Harry's neck and slid out from under him, drawing away. "Don't think about it," he muttered as he made his way out of his room, quietly closing the door.

He went to the island in the kitchen and left a note, the closest thing to a love letter he'd ever written, and laid his wand on top of it.

"Don't think about it," he repeated, opening the cupboard under the sink and digging out the old scrub brush that Granger had sent him. He took a breath and closed his eyes, not giving himself even one more moment to think and talk himself out of it, and activated the portkey.

He was sucked through time and space, and the next thing he knew his feet hit the floor in an unfamiliar living room. The door opened and Granger and Weasley came in a moment later.

"Sorry," Granger said, "We weren't sure when you were coming."

"It's fine," he said, breathing through his nose and trying to fight the tears prickling the back of his eyes.

Granger held out a parchment, "You're sure you know what you're doing?"

He nodded and reached out for the quill set out on the desk.

"Malfoy," she said, pulling the contract back, "Draco," she added, voice soft in a way that made Draco want to cry and scream. "If you sign this you can never appeal the decision the court reached. You will be in prison for the rest of your life."

"I know."

Weasley cleared his throat, "Does Harry know you're here?"

"No," he said, looking up at them. "No, I gave him a sleeping draught. He can't know until it's finalized," he added. "You saw what happened at the trial. He's so-" he shook his head, he couldn't say it, couldn't make himself voice the words. Not to them, not to anyone; they were his, all he had left, and he buried them in his chest where his heart used to be. "He can't know."

"Are you certain?" Granger asked again.

"Give it to me," he snapped. "Just give me the damn contract. I can only be tested so many fucking times and if you think leaving Harry wasn't hard enough, if you think-" He broke off, realizing that he was gasping in ragged breaths and that tears had spilled down his face. He wiped his eyes furiously. "We all know that I am not the pinnacle of valor. Doing what is right when it is difficult has never been my strong suit. So please," he said, "please stop asking me."

"You love him, too," Weasley breathed as though it was some sort of revelation.

He snatched the contract from Granger's hand and signed it before either of them could say anything else. "You said you'd have someone from the ministry ready to take me?" he said, thrusting his chin up in the air and refusing to give in to the urge to break down.

"I'm taking you," she said softly.

He nodded, "let's go, then."

"Is there anything-" Weasley started.

He shook his head and ignored the way a tear slipped down his cheek, "There is only one thing I want and we all know I can't have him."

"Come on, then," Granger said, holding out her elbow.

Just as they apparated Weasley called out, "You're a good person, Draco Malfoy."

"He's right, you know," she said when their feet hit the ground.

Draco shook his head, "I'm not, obviously," he said gesturing to the prison doors they were about to walk through. "Will you do something for me?" he asked.

She nodded, "What do you need?"

"Don't let him do anything stupid," he said.

She laughed, "I've spent my whole life failing at that."

"Tell him it's okay," he pleaded, "It's fine to move on, to live a happy life. Tell him I want that for him." He swallowed around the tears. "Tell him he deserves to be happy more than anyone, that he deserves the best life," he said, an ugly sob escaping.

Before he knew what was happening, Granger wrapped him in her arms and pulled him into an uncomfortably tight hug. "We'll figure this out," she said fiercely.

He pulled back, shaking his head and wiping his face. "Don't. And please don't say that to him."

She searched his face for a long moment and Draco tried to pull himself together. "Right," she said, nodding once and squaring her shoulders, "This way."

He closed his eyes and let the memory of the sound of the waves crashing to shore, of Harry's hand in his, and the warm sun on his face, fill him up one more time before the darkness ahead.

--------------

Part 8 | Part 10

#veritaserum prompt fic #part 9 #angst #angsty angst #happy ending to come #self sacrificing idiots #drarry #drarry fics #sorry this part is soooo long overdue. #I'll get it posted to AO3 asap. #<3