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perotovar · 3 months

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baby, i'm-a want you — (ch 1) "session one"

gif by me

pairing: joel miller/dieter bravo (just this time. main pairing is still javi/joel) rating: E (18+) mdni word count: 3.5k content: swearing, joel and tommy's southern accents being cute af, dieter being a menace, joel being awkward af (but it's cute), cringey porn dialogue, male masturbation (briefly), one (1) handjob, one (1) blowjob (it's messy), lmk if i missed anything! dividers: @saradika-graphics beta: @qveerthe0ry (ily ♥)

summary: javier peña has been doing this a long time. he's really good at his job. joel miller? not so much. he started doing this to get some extra cash to support his daughters. what happens when they're supposed to do a scene together? aka, the au where most of the ppcu boys are gay porn stars~

(read this first ->) prologue | series masterlist

Joel never would have guessed he’d do something like this ten years ago. Hell, not even five years ago. He’s not even totally sure how he got here, if he’s honest with himself.

He just remembers an, admittedly shady, business-looking man coming up to him and shoving a business card in his face. He asked if Joel had ever slept with men before. Joel was taken aback and thought he was coming onto him in a really bizarre way. He had, but that was none of this man’s business as far as he was concerned.

“There’s no pressure, I promise. Here, my website is on the card. If you see what you like, you gimme a call, okay?” The man had winked, grabbed his coffee, and left.

Joel was left sitting in the middle of that coffee shop stunned into silence.

Later that night, sitting in front of the laptop Sarah nearly forced on him, he clumsily typed (using only his index fingers) the name of the website from the business card into the search bar.

Love Bites

The name and the man, Max Phillips according to the card, and his invasive question should’ve told him everything he needed to know, but Joel wasn’t prepared for the absolute onslaught of nudity he was met with.

“Jesus–” Joel mumbled to himself, slamming the laptop closed. Not that that would take it away, but he could hope. He sighed and looked up at the ceiling, shaking his head to himself. “The fuck you get yourself into, Miller?” He grumbled.

Slowly, and with one eye closed, he opened his laptop again. Once he got both eyes on it again, the website wasn’t… too bad. Well, it was still a porn site, but it wasn’t anything he hadn't seen before. He started looking around some more and didn’t bother turning it down. He lived alone now, both girls having moved out within the last year or so. He missed the hell out of them, and frankly, found himself bored more often than not. He and Tommy still owned Miller Contracting, but Joel stuck to the delegating and organizing part now. He had too many knee and back problems to keep up on the actual building part.

His finger rolled over to the “profiles” section of the website. He raised a brow and clicked on the trackpad hesitantly. There were several headshots of the men that made content for the website. He felt his cock twitch in his jeans and cleared his throat awkwardly, exhaling heavily. Well, it… had been a while. What could it hurt, right?

He did have a lot of options…

Dark eyes trailing over the men on the site, he smiled softly. They all had little biographies that explained what their sexualities and preferences were. He snorted a little at seeing two different cowboys; one gay and a little older than himself, the other bisexual and perhaps around the same age. The younger cowboy had a prominent mustache and had a preference for “tying people up”. Bit on the nose in Joel’s opinion, but there was something for everyone. The older cowboy tended toward more amateur-style, “romantic” videos. Joel’s heart softened a little, but decided he wasn’t really in the mood for that sort of thing.

In his search, he found just about everything; a messy haired, self proclaimed “adventurous” sort, a masked man that liked to roleplay, a clean cut looking man that considered himself a “romantic”. You name it, they probably had it. But his eyes landed on a particular man…

He had deep, intense eyes and a thick mustache. His hair was styled like he walked out of the 80s and he was wearing a thin gold chain. He had a bit of a Burt Reynolds thing going on, and normally that wouldn’t be something Joel was into, but this time, well…

Joel clicked on his – Javier’s – page and started browsing the videos he had available. His bio said he was “fluid and polyamorous”, but Joel didn’t know what that meant. Wow, he was… popular. That didn’t surprise Joel at all, but his eyes landed on one of Javier’s “solo” videos. It looked like it was filmed in his apartment, but it probably wasn’t from how well lit it was. The video started off like Joel guessed all of them did; a fancy graphic with the words “Love Bites” in the center of the screen before the sound effect of someone taking a bite out of something, and a faint moan. The tips of Joel’s ears warmed, but he pressed on, watching Javier walk onto screen and sit in the middle of the couch that was in frame.

Javier’s jeans were very tight, but maybe even moreso because of how fucking hard he looked to be. Joel swallowed a lump in his throat, his cock twitching again. Javier had an easy smirk on his handsome face, but he seemed like he didn’t have the cockiness that Joel expected a pornstar to have. The video seemed like it was personally sent to Joel and that thought made Joel’s cock stand to attention almost comically quickly. Unzipping his own jeans, he groaned at the constriction leaving, allowing him to breathe easier. He squeezed his cock and looked back at the video, Javier already getting started without him. He was stroking his own cock slowly, almost teasingly, biting a plump bottom lip. Joel moaned and shut his eyes for a quick second as he took himself in hand–

Ring, ring.

Joel groaned, squeezing his cock harder, and dug his phone out of his pocket. Tommy. He sighed and paused the video on Javier’s blissed out face and big hand wrapped around his–

Ring, ring.

“Christ, Tommy, what is it?” He grumbled, pressing the too-new-for-his-liking phone to his ear.

“Jesus, who pissed in your oatmeal this mornin’?” Tommy’s easy voice filtered in, a chuckle wrapped around his words. “And why are ya outta breath? Ya okay?”

“What–? Yeah, ‘m fine, Tommy. Why y’callin’?”

“Wonderin’ if ya could stop by tonight. Maria’s makin’ meatloaf and I know ya like it.”

Joel did really like Maria’s meatloaf. He sighed to himself and shut his laptop, his cock having softened considerably since hearing his brother’s voice. “Yeah,” he cleared his throat, trying to subtly zip up his jeans while he held the phone against his shoulder. “I’ll come over in a little bit, just gotta… gonna make a phone call.”

“Ooh, ya finally have a date, old man?”

“Can it,” Joel grunted. “‘M forty-three. Ain’t that old. And no, I was gonna call Sarah. See how her classes are goin’.”

“Send her our love, will ya? ‘N tell her she’ll have a cousin soon. Maria’s ‘bout to pop any day. ‘M scared to death,” Tommy sighed. The happiness was clear in his voice, though. Joel was happy for him, and smiled to himself. “How’s Ellie doin’, by the way?”

“Good. Think she said somethin’ ‘bout joinin’ a… roller derby team? Don’t rightly know, but,” he shrugged to himself. “Sounded like somethin’ she’d like, way she was describin’ it.”

Talking on the phone with Tommy always went the same way. He’d find a way to chew up a couple hours of your time, but Joel never minded. Once they said their goodbyes and their I-love-yous, Joel picked up Max Phillips’ business card and sighed, rubbing his thumb over the phone number.

What could it hurt, right?

That was two years ago. He’s been working for Love Bites for two years and had been avoiding Javier Peña as much as he could.

Joel’s never been good at… initiating conversations. Ellie would always give him shit for it. She usually went up to whoever had caught Joel’s eye and slyly made it her goal to get them to come over to him.

But Ellie wasn’t here and she never would be. His girls knew what he did and even if they were a little concerned for him at first, they saw how much happier he’d been since joining. He was healthier, gaining a bit of “chub” as Sarah called it, and a healthier glow to his skin. He was on camera more often now, so he had to eat well and work out a little more. He didn’t do anything too crazy, and the audience that watched his videos had a lot of positive opinions and comments about his physique. It made him blush to think about it for too long, so he tried not to.

What was he saying?

Oh, right. Avoiding Javier Peña.

He’d had a huge crush on him ever since that first video he watched, and frankly, didn’t want to make a fool of himself if he talked to him. He’s filmed one video with him and it was the best Joel had felt in years. He almost came too quickly, and the video was supposed to be twenty minutes long. They had to pause so Joel could calm himself down, but Javier was patient and lovely with him. Javier had been doing this a lot longer than Joel had, so he wasn’t worried, which made Joel feel better. Just a little embarrassed. Afterwards, he had to leave, making up a story about seeing his girls for dinner that night.

“Javi!”

Joel’s eyes snapped up from his phone. He was in the middle of texting Sarah, saying that he’d call her when he got home from work. He had a scene with Dieter today.

And there he was. God. Joel’s cheeks flushed at the sight of Javier standing in the hall in his robe. He must’ve just finished his scene with Shane, the new kid. He couldn’t hear what he was saying, but the sound of Javier’s deep, commanding voice was enough to send a chill down Joel’s spine. Before he knew it, Javier was talking animatedly with Steve, another actor, as they walked off down the hall and disappearing around a corner.

He knew, realistically, relationships between porn actors could happen. Silva and Jake had been together for years. Joel’s problem with that was, well… Joel. His last real relationship was with Sarah’s mom years ago, and when the girls were in high school he had a relationship with this guy, Ezra for a while.

Smack!

“Jesus–!” Joel jumped, holding onto one of his ass cheeks protectively. Only one person would have done that.

“Hey, handsome,” Dieter grinned, sticking a hand down the back pocket of Joel’s jeans and squeezing. “Getting lost in Javi’s eyes again?” He winked.

“N-no! I am not,” Joel grumbled, finishing off his text and shoving his phone in his pocket.

Dieter snorted and rolled his eyes, then removed his hand to hold it out for Joel to take. “C’mon, big guy. You get to cum on my face today,” he smirked.

Filming with Dieter always felt good. He was a bit wild for Joel’s personal tastes, but he always made sure Joel was comfortable, and today was no different.

Joel was playing a “plumber” that needed to work on Dieter’s “pipes”. This of course led to Dieter offering to “pay” in his own way.

“Oh, come on, big guy like you doesn’t need money, right?” Dieter recited his lines expertly, running a hand down Joel’s t-shirt covered chest. “Bet it gets lonely doing this sort of work, huh?”

Joel had gotten a lot better at the acting part of things over the past couple of years. He was super stiff (and not in the right way) in the beginning, but now, he easily plastered on a smirk, eyes glued to Dieter’s lips. “Sometimes,” he shrugged, a big hand hovering over Dieter’s shoulder. Dieter saw the hand out of the corner of his eye and grinned, curling his fingers around Joel’s thick wrist and moving it down to his ass.

Joel smirked, squeezing the plump flesh appreciatively. “Bit forward o’ you,” he rumbled.

Dieter visibly shivered and bit his lip. “Sexy guy like you, of course I am,” he breathed. He leaned forward and kissed Joel messily, the hand on Joel’s torso moving down to unzip his jeans. Joel was already painfully hard and grunted into Dieter’s mouth when his pants were opened and lowered enough to pull his cock free. Dieter moaned and curled his fingers around Joel’s shaft, pumping rhythmically.

They stayed like that for a while; open mouth kisses, heavy breathing from Joel, and Dieter’s moans being picked up by the mics.

Dieter pulled away to look down at the thick cock in his hand and bit his lip at the sight. “Fuck,” he groaned, his own cock twitching in his sweats. “Can I suck your cock?” He looked up at Joel demurely, eyes big and nearly black with desire.

Joel forgot he was supposed to be acting for a minute and grunted, hips bucking into Dieter’s grasp. “F-fuck, yeah,” he nodded, eyes glazed over. Dieter smiled and guided Joel over to the couch on the set. Technically, Dieter was supposed to get on his knees in the “kitchen”, but he knew Joel wouldn’t be able to stand for that long with his back problems. Sometimes Dieter’s improv classes came in handy. Max couldn’t complain too much, as long as Dieter sucked Joel off, then the video was still following the script.

Joel grunted as he sat, hard cock swaying slightly. Dieter giggled a little and happily got down on his knees, hands traveling up and down Joel’s thighs appreciatively. “Such a pretty cock,” he hummed, licking his lips as he watched it twitch in front of him, a drop of pre-cum gathering at the tip.

“Why dontcha put that mouth to use, then?” Joel smirked, gripping the base and tapping the head against Dieter’s cheek. “Want your discount, right?”

Dieter smiled and opened his mouth wide, eyes shut in pure bliss. Joel gripped Dieter’s messy curls and held him still as he hit the head of his cock against Dieter’s tongue. Dieter moaned and opened his eyes, watching Joel’s face for any cues to stop. They never came, but it was something they all had to keep an eye on. When everything seemed to be going well, he happily wrapped his mouth around the head of Joel’s cock and started bobbing his head up and down.

He moaned, the vibrations traveling down Joel’s cock and up his spine, making Joel groan in return. “Mmm, knew you’d be good with your mouth,” he grinned, holding the back of Dieter’s head to set a pace Joel liked better.

Dieter heard a cameraman move to his right to get a better angle of his mouth, so he amped it up a little. He got messier, saliva dripping down along the sides of Joel’s shaft. Joel moaned weakly, resting his head on the back of the couch, but keeping one of his hands tangled in Dieter’s messy curls. Dieter started bobbing his head slower, eyes locked on Joel’s face as he moved further down his shaft, taking as much as he could down his throat. He choked slightly and pulled off, pre-cum and saliva covering his mouth and Joel’s cock. He smiled up at Joel and panted heavily, curling his fingers around the base to pump the thick cock.

Joel’s eyes rolled back and he grunted, hips bucking off the couch. “C’mere,” he breathed, heavy work boots landing heavily on the set floor as he stood. “Gonna fuck your face.”

Dieter shivered at the low timbre of Joel’s voice and nodded happily up at him. He pulled his sweats down and gripped his own cock in hand and started stroking himself rhythmically. Dieter opened his mouth for Joel obediently and nearly choked again when Joel shoved his cock down Dieter’s throat. He moaned weakly when Joel’s hips started moving, his heavy balls slapping against Dieter’s chin.

Dieter just had to take it, the lewd sounds of Joel fucking his face filling the otherwise quiet room. He fucking loved it because Joel was subtly massaging Dieter’s scalp and it sent shivers down his spine. His fist was almost a blur over his own cock and tears leaked out of his eyes, a blush high on his cheeks.

“Mmm, bein’ such a good boy f’me,” Joel grunted, biting his lip to rein it in a little. Dieter moaned at the praise, eyebrows downturned in pleasure. “Yeah? Like bein’ my good boy?”

Dieter whined and nodded as best he could, eyes completely glazed over. Joel slowed down his hips a little and let Dieter breathe for a minute. Dieter panted hard, a near-dopey smile on his face. “Come on my face,” he breathed heavily, extending his tongue for Joel. “Please.”

It was Joel’s turn to shiver as he slapped the head of his cock against Dieter’s face again. “Gonna have to earn it,” Joel smirked, reciting his lines as well as he could.

Dieter whined and pouted up at him, his own hand slowing down a little. He didn’t say anything, letting Joel continue.

“Make me come, and I’ll paint this pretty face o’ yours.”

Dieter’s face lit up and he curled his fingers around Joel’s shaft. He watched Joel’s face while he wrapped his lips around the head and bobbed his head. His free hand held Joel’s hip and subtly moved to his ass and squeezed. He moaned around Joel’s cock and shut his eyes briefly before obediently looking up at him, big eyes wet and innocent.

“Atta boy,” Joel grunted, cupping Dieter’s face lovingly. Dieter removed his mouth to kiss down his length as he stroked him, attaching his lips to one of Joel’s balls. “Mmm, fuck,” Joel breathed, tipping his head back.

The hand on Joel’s ass moved slightly until one of Dieter’s fingertips prodded at Joel’s asshole. Joel grunted in surprise and smiled down at Dieter. “Really want me all over ya, huh?”

“Yes,” Dieter nodded, sucking one of Joel’s balls into his mouth. “Please.”

“Keep talkin’ like that and– ooh, fuck – Jus’ might get your wish,” Joel panted, shutting his eyes. He felt the build up in his lower stomach, his cock twitching violently in Dieter’s hand. “C’mere, baby boy,” he grinned, taking his cock back to stroke himself over Dieter’s face.

Dieter was buzzing, lifting Joel’s t-shirt to lovingly caress his hairy tummy, mouth open wide and obedient.

Joel felt his balls draw up and his hips buck until– “Fuck–! Shit,” He moaned, thick ropes of come spurting out from the tip of his cock and landing on Dieter’s face and mouth. He caressed Dieter’s hair, thick fingers massaging his scalp while the other hand stroked himself until his balls were completely empty.

Dieter happily licked his mouth clean, and hid his face in Joel’s stomach, whimpering into the sweaty skin. He moaned weakly, his entire body trembling as he came, completely untouched. Dieter was the only one in the cast that could do that, and he loved showing it off as much as he could.

“Shit,” Joel smiled, petting Dieter’s sweaty curls back and out of his face. “Ain’t you a sight.”

“Cut!”

Dieter deflated, a huge grin on his face. He started giggling into Joel’s stomach and smiled up at him. “Fucking love your cock, Joel,” he hummed happily.

“That’s what you always say,” Joel snorted, helping him up onto his feet. Dieter was a little wobbly still and cuddled into Joel’s side. He always got a little clingy after a scene, but Joel didn’t mind. As different as they were, Joel would probably consider Dieter one of his closest friends. It always worked in their favor, their natural chemistry and closeness coming through the cameras.

They were handed a couple towels and some water, the both of them taking them gratefully. Max came up to them, his usual shit-eating grin on his face. Joel always thought Max reminded him of a vampire, with that mischievous glint in his eye that always seemed to be there.

“Great show, boys,” Max started. “Dieter, d’you mind if I steal Joel away for a second?”

Dieter whined and clinged onto Joel tighter. Joel grinned and hugged him back. “Sorry, boss, looks like he ain’t leavin’ anytime soon.”

Max rolled his eyes, but continued anyway. “Fine. Meant to tell you earlier, but things got rolling, you know how it is–”

“What is it, Max?”

“You’ve got a scene with Javier tomorrow.”

If there were a record player anywhere, Joel would probably hear it scratching right about now. Dieter paused too, and looked up at Joel with worried eyes. He knew all about Joel’s crush, and was always telling Joel to just go for it. Joel froze briefly, but tried to school his emotions as best he could.

“O-okay, um. What time?” He asked shakily, gripping Dieter’s fluffy robe tighter.

“I’m thinking around noon? That way Javier can prepare, y’know?”

Preparing was always done before a particularly intense scene. Joel tried really hard not to think about Javier wearing a plug for a while before coming to set.

“Right,” Joel nodded, cheeks going a little pink. “I’ll be there.”

“You’re the best, Joel!” Max snapped his fingers and walked off, talking to a couple of assistants.

Dieter tapped on his chest and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “You really gotta say something, Joel,” he said softly.

Joel sighed and nodded. He knew that.

He just didn’t know what.

#joel miller #dieter bravo #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #joel miller smut #joel miller series #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo fic #dieter bravo smut #dieter bravo series #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal cinematic universe #ppcu fanfiction #oaksfics

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inklore · 1 year

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impetuous

premise: the little games you and joel like to play become risky when you almost get caught.

pairing: joel miller x smuggler!reader

word count: 1.4k

warnings: eighteen+ content, unprotected piv, established enemies with benefits, dirty talk, a certain clothing item being used as a gag, small mention of masturbation and bjs, hints of angst.

note: episode eight changed me as a person, the integration scene rewired my brain chemistry and i just needed to get this out before i collapsed from being in heat. the gif was made by me so don't steal pretty please.

part of this world but you don't have to read it to enjoy this!

“Shh, shh,” Joel silences you, just as a hard thrust of his cock has your mouth falling open, a moan filling the air of the damp shed. The crunch of sticks and gravel outside makes your already thumping heart beat faster against your rib cage.

Brows drawn together, the hands gripping onto Joel’s flannel digging into his sides. The thumb that was just pressed to the column of your throat—dirty palm squeezing your airway just enough to lower your moans, enough to make you wetter and less coherent—now moves down to where you’re bare and his cock is fucking into you. The rough pad of his thumb moving along your clit, “focus right here.”

Ignore the noises outside.

Ignore the possibility of getting caught by someone out after dark and up to no good.

Ignore the possibility of getting thrown in a cell by FEDRA because you two were out after dark and up to no good.

“Fuc-Joel,” you whine. Clench your eyes shut until all you can see is little white dots behind them. Try to focus on those, on the burn you feel from the tears that are now prickling at your lash line from how hard you’re trying to focus.

From how hard you’re trying to keep your mouth shut, to not getting caught—at least not before you’ve come.

Joel’s words “focus right here” mocking and blaring in your head like a song you can’t stop humming, a song stuck in your head, a song you want to bodily remove from your brain stem; your focus on the footsteps outside no longer the issue; your attentions shifting to the head of his cock, hitting every spot inside of you that makes your legs tighten around his hips more, on the burning pleasure he’s delivering to your clit right now.

You couldn’t focus on anything but him if you tried, and you’re trying really hard to focus that attention on staying quiet.

Which the two of you know is not your forte, in and out of this situation.

The countless times when Joel’s not fucking you come to the forefront of your mind of him complaining about your need to argue, to talk talk talk, instead of the two of you doing a trade, or making the other come.

“Anyone ever told you you talk too much?”

"Well, one of us has to do the talking, Mr. Resting Grump Face. Besides, you’d be bored if I didn’t make you work for what you came for.”

“That what you call it? Workin’ for it? You mean until I give you what you want because you can’t seem to ask for it unless you’re deliverin’ me bad news,” he had smirked. Wiped the grin from your face and covered it with his mouth seconds later as he backed you into the wall, groin grinding against your front. “I got better uses for that mouth.”

The scrape of the metal table your ass is on moves each time Joel thrusts, each time his cock drags against your sensitive walls over and over. If it weren’t for his jeans still covering half of him, the sounds of your skin moving against each other—and your wetness that was more than likely staining the front of his jeans, the small window in the back doing little to help light anything but his face and neck—would cover up the mewls and cries making your throat hoarse and raw each time they slip out when you fight to swallow them down.

“The only way you know how to be quiet is with my cock in your mouth.” There’s humor in his tone; his heavy breaths add more heat to your face. You feel his free hand run along your leg, moving it from his hip for half a second as he pulls your underwear from your calf and over your ankle until it’s in his palm and he’s pushing the material into your mouth.

You can taste the remnants of your arousal on the cotton, from even before the two of you started your little game. When it was still just a simple trade of stolen items and things your boss was too cowardly to hand off to the big bad grump. When he had just been scowling at you, listening to your bullshit story, and bidding the time until one of you cracked. Before both of you threw the items to the side and Joel’s hands were bending you over the nearest surface or pushing you to your knees.

You swallow around the material, your whimpers caught by the fabric and barely audible. His lips press against the material, barely touching your lips; the sweat on his forehead mingles with your own as he presses it against yours. “Focus on comin’ for me, take what you came for. C’mon. Come with me,” he grunts. Moves his hips in a way that has your eyes rolling back and your teeth biting the salvia-soaked cotton.

The hand not rubbing fast circles on your clit, cups the back of your skull. His dirty fingers wrapped in your hair, keeping you in place. Keeping you bent at the perfect angle so your hips can meet his. So his thumb has access to that nerve that’s making your toes curl—to push his cock further and further into you so the tip hits something pleasurably painful.

When you’re coming, when his name is muffled against your underwear and your nails are clinging and digging into his skin from the searing heat that has your body convulsing against him—"That's it, that's it, take it” murmured against your forehead—you feel him finish seconds later. Your walls clenching and spasming around his cock. A deep grunt breathed against your skin.

Your insides feel warm, like jell-o left out in the sun. Like if Joel never moved from between your legs and the two of you stayed connected forever, you wouldn’t mind.

And after he’s pulled out and his warmth is gone from your body, you quickly shoot down the disappointment rising up inside of you that he didn’t stay between your legs longer. That this part of the night is over, and now you’re back to the game.

To the reason you snuck out after dark to begin with.

Completely denying yourself any opposing thought that could put that reason into question. The two of you have been doing this for too long for your mind to think it’s something it isn’t.

Even when he doesn’t just take what he came for and leave or shoot you a scowl when he helps you find your pants, the way you expect him to.

Or how he doesn’t let you go first no matter how much arguing you do against it—how he makes sure the coast is clear before signaling it’s safe. Him hanging behind to—cover his ass, you’re sure—make sure when you slip down the dark alleyway, no one is there to catch you sneaking away into the night.

And later, when you’re laying in bed, you’ll chalk up the pounding need you feel again as you remember Joel’s rough fingers against you—your jaw, your neck, digging into your sides, your shoulder to keep you from moving anywhere but against him, anywhere but where he wouldn’t be inside of you—and his words still playing in your head “focus right here, come with me”, your heart will pick up, and you’ll have no choice but to sedate the ache you feel by making yourself come. Joel’s name on your tongue and bit into your bottom lip; you’ll blame it on his stupid mouth and your lack of options for sexual partners in this hell hole.

It won’t be because of an attachment or attraction of any kind.

Fuck that.

And tomorrow, when you tell Robert to do his own fucking deliveries, it won’t be because of your feelings but instead because you almost got caught last night. This little game becoming more of a risk than entertainment for you, and you’ll be damned if you get in the mix with FEDRA over Joel and the underlying need the both of you have to pick each other apart and pull the hatred you harbor inside out with teeth, tongues, and fingers that make you see stars.

But Robert is spineless, and you’re not convincing enough to make yourself believe you want to end anything with Joel.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller one shot #joel miller smut #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x female reader #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fics #joel miller fics #joel miller x smuggler!reader #the last of us fic #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller imagine

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weirdly-specific-but-ok · 4 months

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pt VI good omens s1e2, a totally all-inclusive summary i remember everything

i don't, that's a lie. i lie like aziraphale, rarely and badly but with great gaslight energy.

alright well let's not dawdle for 6000 years, i'll forget what i DO remember.

An angel named Gabriel who is not Jimbriel yet, so a foetus Jimbriel, gets into Aziraphale's bookstore and yells about pornography to keep humans from following him into Aziraphale's secret back chamber.

What they do there, I do not know. It is up to speculation. They talk and Aziraphale is flustered about Crowley, I think, but that's the whole show so far.

The intro sequence remains strange. Cartoon Aziraphale is an impregnated chicken, cartoon Crowley is the baby daddy.

There are witch hunters and they want to burn Agnes Nutter alive. I don't know who Anges Nutter is yet.

We cut to Agnes Nutter and I know I will never forget her. She is beautiful and a BAMF. A MILF. An absolute bombshell.

The bombshell part is literal. They set her on fire and she explodes, killing all those in a 100 metre radius. I want to be her.

I assume it is a witch thing, but then find out she put bombs under her skirts. I want to be her, but more ardently.

There is a book. She writes prophecies in it.

There are horsemen of the apocalypse, which I forgot was still happening. We are in present day.

War kills everyone. She is pretty. She is not Warlock, the kid whom Aziraphale and Crowley raised.

Famine is a sexy beast, and runs Michelin star restaurants. He likes tiny food. He is developing foodless food.

If there are others, I do not notice. There could be. There really could be. There probably are.

There is a girl who scribbles on the book from earlier. She grows up. I think she is War. I am wrong. This is probably a good time to mention to Tumblr that I have mild issues with facial recognition, which is totally not going to affect my understanding of what is happening at all.

She is named Anathema. That could be someone else. What is real? Not Neil Gaiman.

She finds the Antichrist and the Them, and they are all playing at a witch hunt. The Antichrist does not have an aura. Yellow is fear. Yellow is joy. I lose track of what is happening for several scenes.

Newt is works in an office. There is a power cut. Newt no longer works at an office.

Newt joins a witch hunt.

There is a delivery man. I think he is Newt. I am wrong. His name is something resembling Judy. It is an easy mistake, everyone's reaction to not-Newt-maybe-Judy is the same as that to Newt, deep protective love.

Crowley and Aziraphale steal a Bentley. Find a Bentley? I am unsure. I am too busy looking at Crowley.

Crowley speeds. Crowley likes speeding. They hit a motorbike that has maybe-Anathema. They pick her up and take her to a house somewhere. The Bentley plays Queen music. Everyone is very excited about this. Beepop.

Maybe-Anathema enters the house. This could have been before she finds the Antichrist. But if the show isn't linear I don't have to be either, I decide.

Crowley and Aziraphale panic a lot, but find time to eye each other hungrily and lovingly. They have priorities, and I respect that.

Crowley yells at his plants to grow better. He pretends to kill one of them. I cannot believe I was entirely right about my interpretation of that GIF. I am filled with confused anger. Later I find out that he is projecting how heaven told him he was a disappointment and threw him out. I am no longer angry. I am sad. This is an ongoing thing when it comes to Crowley.

A major plot point is Dog, the best friend of the Antichrist, having a face off with a fat tabby cat. Dog loses. It was doomed from the start.

Aziraphale gaslights gatekeeps and girlbosses. He assures heaven that everything is under control. It is not. That is okay. I think.

Heaven asks about Crowley. Aziraphale gets flustered. This is as per usual and he assures them that he is battling Crowley, who keeps him on his toes. I not-so-privately think that Crowley keeps him on his knees, really.

Things happen. I'm too busy thinking about Aziraphale's puppy eyes. He is a bitchy sweetheart. I love him.

More things happen. I'm too busy thinking about Crowley's sexy hips and shoulders and, well, everything.

The episode ends. I am still thinking about Crowley. I am always thinking about Crowley. Everyone is always thinking about Crowley.

This... this is all I remember. Have it, Tumblr.

#good omens #good omens summary #good omens mascot #good omens fandom #crowley #aziraphale #azirowley #aziracrow #aziraley #good ineffable omens #lgbtqia #queer #ineffable husbands #ineffable spouses #david tennant #michael sheen #crowley's hips and hair

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silenzahra · 24 days

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It's today! 🤩✨

Today's April 5th, which means...

Our favorite movie turns one year old! 🤩👏🥳🎂💃✨

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AAAAHHHHH 🤩👏🏻🥳🎂💃🏻💚❤️✨

This movie was soooo important to me! 🥰 I was in a really bad place when it came out, so I'm not exaggerating when I say it saved my life! I literally owe my life to the Super Mario Brothers 🥹❤️💚

To celebrate, I decided to create five posts with gifs from this amazing movie! This will be the first, focusing on some characters and some of my favorite scenes from the film, and my three favorite characters will have their own posts that will be shared later today! You can check them all here 🥰

Mario

Luigi

Brotherly love

Princess Peach

I really hope you like these posts! Let's-a go! 😁🍄✨

Fave scenes (in no particular order) ✨

Mareach ❤️🩷

The two scenes that give me goosebumps (and make me cry) ❤️💚

Characters 🍄🍌🐧🌟

Unfortunately I can't add any more gifs, but I think this sums up very well my favorite scenes from the movie and also some of the characters aside from Mario, Luigi and Peach! I LOVE all of these characters and I wanted them to have at least one gif dedicated to them 🥹

And the scenes are my absolute favorites! 🤩 The commercial, the fight against DK, the Mario Kart part, the moment Mario and DK get to the Mushroom Kingdom, Mario training, the babies (did not expect at all to see the bros as babies!), the whole Superstar scene, the ending... And the Fire Flower field, where we get some of the cutest Mareach moments in the whole movie 🥹 And I decided to highlight them together with a couple more simply because I love these two cuties so so much ❤️🩷

I also had to highlight my two favorite scenes. My God, the moment Mario and Luigi reunite and hug, Mario on the verge of tears, Luigi unable to stop laughing... My heart warms every single time I see it and I also tear up, these two brothers are just so adorable and love each other so so much!!! They'd literally do ANYTHING for each other and I just LOVE their beautiful and deep bond 🥹❤️💚

Btw, if you love this beautiful scene just as much as I do, you may wanna check this post I shared a while back if you haven't yet! 🥰

And last but not least, I truly get goosebumps every single time I see Luigi standing in front of Mario to protect him from Bowser's fire with the manhole. It was finally the time for my beloved Luigi to shine!!! 🥹🥹🥹 It was the evidence that he's just as brave as his big brother and is just as willing to protect him at all costs as Mario is willing to do the same for him. They're a team, they'll always be there for each other and nothing can hurt them as long as they're together 🥹❤️💚

I'm just so happy this movie exists! As I said, I owe it my life, so it'll always live in my heart and soul rent-free 🥹💚❤️

#super mario bros #super mario movie #mario movie #first anniversary #the super mario bros movie #the super mario brothers movie #mario movie anniversary #mario movie first anniversary #fave scenes #mareach #mario and luigi #brotherly love #mario #luigi #princess peach #toad #dk #king penguin #lumalee

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hearts4hughes · 1 year

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the fight | jack hughes

jack hughes x fem! reader

a/n: something quick as i finish up some part 2s for other jack fics

warnings: talk of a fight (not sure if that’s a warning or not?)

gif is not mine

one second you were chatting with jim, and the next you’re out of your seat, trying to get a better view as jack takes down aho.

“oh my god.” you mumble, watching him pound on the player below him. you frantically look over to jim who seems unfazed as ever. “jack’s in a fight!” you exclaim with wide eyes.

he chuckles at your obvious observation, taking another bite of popcorn. “he’ll be fine.” your eyes dart back and fourth between jim and the fight on the ice. he lets out another hardy laugh as your mouth hangs agape. “don’t worry. i mean he’s winning, so that’s good!” he jokes.

you smile unsurely, laughing to yourself at the fact jack’s own father isn’t even slightly fazed at his first nhl fight. “sure…”

as the refs break up the scene, jack looks up towards your seat in the arena. worry drowns your features until he breaks out into a toothy smile, showing off his newly missing tooth. he gives you a quick wink, sending butterflies off in your stomach, and returning his focus back to the game.

he finds this amusing.

“looks like someone tried to impress you.” jim observes the flirty looks his son sends to you. your cheeks flush a deep red.

“he looks too happy for someone who just got in a fight.” you point out, taking your seat next to jim once again.

the rest of the game goes by smoothly. the devils won 8-4 with a huge lead. along with that, aho steered away from jack and refrained from taking cheap shots at other players.

jim decided to head home after the game. he’d call later to congratulate his sons and talk about their game play. which left you here now, mindlessly walking through the tunnels of the prudential center. as you round the corner near the locker rooms, you wait and strike up conversation with other hockey wags.

“hey, baby.” jack’s voice causes you to redirect your attention from the conversation to him. he wears a proud, but smug smile, practically waiting to be scolded by you.

you look at him unamused. “you started a fight!” you whisper yell, grabbing his hand and leading him into a more private corner.

he laughs, bringing you into a deep hug. “good observation, honey.”

“it’s not funny!” you bite back a huge grin, trying so hard to keep your composure. “you could’ve gotten hurt.” you pout, nuzzling your face into his neck.

“well it’s a good thing i didn’t.” he pulls you away from his neck, staring into your eyes with a wide smile. “aho had it coming for him. he was cross checking and slashing all game. i wasn’t going to take it anymore.”

he presses a soft kiss to your lips, bringing you back against his chest. you breath in his freshly showered scent, savoring the moment, even if you were trying to act disappointed.

“you’re lucky you’re hot.” you sigh against him.

“even with my missing tooth?” he teases playfully. you giggle at his slight lisp. it was barely noticeable, but it made you smile like an idiot when he struggled to fully pronounce letters like t or s.

“yes, jack.” you reassure, pressing another kiss to his lips. “even with your missing tooth.”

#hearts4hughes #new jersey devils #jack hughes #nhl imagine #hockey blurb #hockey imagines #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagine #nora's writings 💐

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lowkeychenle · 9 months

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Opposites Attract [ZCL/NJM] (M)

Description: Your relationship with Jaemin started out simple--friends with benefits with zero complications...until there was one. That complication's name is Zhong Chenle, and after Jaemin agrees to expand your exclusivity deal to involve him, there's only one logical thing left to do...

Genre: Smut. That's it. It's literally 4.4k worth of smut.

This was a request! Thank you for requesting what turned into what is most likely the longest sex scene I have ever written LOL (and to the other anon in my inbox, my wonderfully Jaemle-fied brain is coming for you next)

Content Warnings: Explicit, rough, unprotected sex (don't do the unprotected part), Chenle says pretty girl again (not sorry) and also slut because duality (again?), Jaemin says princess and whore once i think? Overstimulation !!! and crying because of that...oh and also threesome? didn't know if that was clear lol

Word Count: 4,392

Pairing: Zhong Chenle x Reader x Na Jaemin (the lack of Jaemle gifs is a literal crime so HERE is a picture I found off the internet)

Juliet's Masterlist | Requests

Your arrangement is out of the ordinary, sure, but none of you are complaining. It started off fairly simple, with just you and Jaemin having your way with each other whenever you felt like it. You’d been friends with the boys practically forever at this point—you never kept secrets from them, and they never kept them from you, either.

That is…until you and Jaemin agreed to be friends with benefits. You both were much too busy to have anything real, and there honestly wasn’t anyone else you’d trust enough to not blab about it to all the other boys.

Chenle snuck his way in, figuratively and literally. You and Jaemin were normally very, very careful with this. None of the boys even had suspicions.

In group settings, he treats you like he treats the rest of them.

In private? You’re his princess, and he worships the ground you walk on.

That day, Jaemin texted you asking you to come over. It was the middle of the afternoon, and your activities were usually saved for nighttime. Either way, you didn’t hesitate. After almost six months of this arrangement, your body automatically responded to him. He never let you down.

He must’ve been frustrated about something because the two of you didn’t make it past the couch to his bedroom. Both of you were shirtless and he was pressed between your legs when his front door opened. Jaemin immediately pressed his chest to yours to cover you the best he could.

“Six months of everyone being ignorant to this has not been long enough,” Jaemin groaned, looking up at Chenle standing in the doorway.

He blinked rapidly at the two of you, in shock more than anything else. Nobody had even come close to suspecting the two of you.

“Dude,” Jaemin said. “Do you mind turning around so I can make sure she’s decent?”

“Yeah, duh. Shit.” Chenle whipped around to stare at the door, tugging his fingers through his hair.

Jaemin quickly grabbed your shirt and whispered an apology and a promise to make it up to you later. You took a deep breath and sat up on the couch, patting your cheeks to snap yourself out of your Jaemin haze.

“I didn’t know you two were a thing.” Chenle turned back to you, arms crossed over his chest.

You and Jaemin glanced at each other before Jaemin replied, “We’re not.”

“Oh, right. I forget that people who aren’t involved have sex all the time. Which is like…the definition of involved.” Chenle quirked an eyebrow.

“We’re not dating, is what he means.” You tried to explain it without spelling it out for him.

“So, he wouldn’t be mad if I asked you for a turn?” Chenle looked at Jaemin, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. “You’d be perfectly okay with that?”

Jaemin’s jaw tightens. “It’s…Don’t be an idiot. There’s no feelings or dating, but it’s still exclusive.”

“Jaem.” You paused and studied Chenle closely. The way your mind strayed could simply be because you were interrupted right when an indescribable amount of heat flooded your body, but at this point, it didn’t even matter.

“What?”

“Why don’t we let him watch?” You tugged Jaemin closer to you and made brief eye contact with him before you dipped down to leave open-mouthed kisses along his neck.

Jaemin let out a shaky breath. “Is that what you want?”

“Ask him.”

Chenle stood there, watching you with laser focus as your hand moved down to palm Jaemin’s bulge through his jeans. His lips parted, tongue running over the edges of his teeth.

“Well?” Jaemin sighed. “Sit down and watch or get the fuck out.”

Without wasting another second, Chenle sat in the recliner and rested his elbows on his knees while he leaned forward.

You did this for two reasons—one, you’d always been attracted to Chenle. You’d always wondered what it’d be like to screw around with him, too, but that was mostly before things started with Jaemin. Two, having someone watch the two of you meant Jaemin would be going all out. He’d want to turn you into a moaning mess, to show that he was the one who made you feel good.

Jaemin is a tender lover, the type that memorizes every inch of your body and uses it accordingly. He’d be rough with you if you asked him too, but his favorite thing is watching you fall apart over and over again as he takes his time and pays attention to details. He knows when you’re close, the specific way to rub your clit to send you over the edge when his hips rutt against yours.

That day, Chenle did watch you. He didn’t get to do much more than that, but he got to witness the way Jaemin worshiped you. The way every single touch of his was deliberate in bringing you to the utmost peak of your pleasure—you went higher and higher every time you were with Jaemin.

He didn’t just watch, though. Not when Jaemin’s head was buried between your thighs, tongue-fucking you to oblivion. Chenle had taken himself out of his shorts and jerked himself off to the sound of your pleasure. When Jaemin finally slid his thick cock into you, he buried his head in your neck and kissed, licked, nipped, everything you liked. He fucked you with such precision, all while you were spread out wide on his couch, fully naked and on display for Chenle.

Jaemin paid him no attention. Only you. Only ever you.

“You fuck her raw?” Chenle’s voice was strained as his hand matched the pace Jaemin thrusted into you.

“Feels good.” Jaemin nodded, breath hitching when you clench around him. “Such a tight little pussy.”

A moan slipped past Chenle’s lips. The sound had you digging your nails into Jaemin’s shoulders. At that moment, you made eye contact with Chenle, and his hand jerked his cock faster. He started cursing quietly, eyebrows furrowing as he neared his end. Jaemin reached between the two of you and rubbed his perfect circles on your clit, and as your orgasm hit you hard, your back arched and you couldn’t contain your scream of pleasure.

When your vision unblurred, you saw Chenle with ropes of white on his T-shirt and his head dropped against the back of the chair. He gulped, trying his best to calm down. Jaemin groaned in your ear and spilled deep inside you, rocking his hips to help you come down from one of the best orgasms you’d had in a long time.

A week or so later when Jaemin gave you permission to initiate a similar relationship with Chenle, you didn’t hesitate. Luckily for you, Jaemin wasn’t possessive, and as long as you were still equally as interested in him, he didn’t care if you fucked Chenle, too.

The first time you did, you were floored and amazed by the differences between the two. Jaemin was tender, caring, gentle. You were royalty in his eyes, something to be worshiped. Chenle, on the other hand, was rough by default. He called you names that had your toes curling that Jaemin would probably punch him in the face for saying.

From that day forward, you fucked one of the two depending on your mood. They respected it and never questioned you, and the arrangement worked so well. Although the two of them stayed separate—they’d never fucked you at the same time, nor did either of them suggest it.

A shame, really.

And now, here you are—surrounded by your five oblivious friends and your two fuck buddies. What could go wrong?

Jaemin was good at being subtle, but when Chenle wanted to fuck you, you knew. A dark look would form in his eyes and they’d sharpen. Jaemin showed his want in more subtle ways, like when his touch would linger a tad too long on your shoulder, or when he’d move past you and touch your waist.

After the rest of the boys leave, Chenle and Jaemin stay behind. This isn’t unnatural, and honestly, they’ve been closer lately than they’ve been in a long time. You settle between them on the couch, closing your eyes and leaning your head on Chenle’s shoulder.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Yeah.” You nod.

Chenle puts his hand on your thigh, moving it higher and higher until it sits at the edge of your denim shorts. You immediately clench your legs together. Since that first time Chenle watched you and Jaemin, nothing like that had happened again. To have him touching you like this with Jaemin right next to you spurs thoughts in you that you’re unsure if either of them would be down with.

Chenle’s fingers slide beneath your shorts, teasingly rubbing along your skin. You glance over at Jaemin, sucking in a sharp breath when you see his eyes locked where you’re being touched.

“Look at you, Princess.” He clicks his tongue, brushing your hair behind your ear. “He’s barely touching you.”

Wetness pools at your core.

Chenle drags his nails across the hem of your panties. “Always so wet and ready. Bet you’d beg for cock, wouldn’t you?”

“Wouldn’t she look so good stuffed with two?” Jaemin reaches beneath your shirt and tugs your bra down to free your breasts. You gasp when he rolls your nipple.

“Fuck, she’d go crazy with you fucking her pussy and me fucking that pretty mouth.” His moves further, barely brushing against your clothed core. “What do you say, pretty girl? You want us both?”

Between Chenle’s teasing and Jaemin playing with your breasts, you can’t do anything but whine. You’ve dreamed of taking them both since Chenle watched you and Jaemin.

“Of course, she does,” Jaemin coos. “Look at her squirming already. We’ve barely even touched her.”

“Please.” You gasp, lifting your hips to try and get Chenle to apply more pressure.

“Who do you want to stretch you out?” Jaemin asks, pulling your shirt over your head before quickly unclasping your bra. “Don’t be shy, baby. Tell us who you want.”

“Both,” you moan. “Don’t stop touching me, please.”

Jaemin leans down to kiss over your chest while Chenle’s lips connect with your neck. You whimper, toes already curling at the feeling of their tongues leaving wet trails on you.

Chenle pops the button on your shorts, the undeniably simple motion making heat swarm every inch of your body. He tugs them off of you. You’re left in a pair of lace panties, but both of the boys are fully clothed. You pull Jaemin away from your breasts to kiss him hard, fumbling with the buttons on his shirt while Chenle fingers dance down your body to your core.

“God, Jaem, she’s soaked.” Chenle lets out a relaxed sigh. “Perfect little cockslut.”

When a shudder runs through you, Jaemin hums against your lips. “Did you like that, Princess? You like when he touches your pretty pussy while he thinks about fucking you like a whore?”

As the words leave Jaemin’s mouth, Chenle’s thumb presses against your clit through your panties and you slam your thighs together. Holy shit, that really just came out of his mouth. Your legs shake as you squirm.

“Don’t be like that,” Jaemin says, gripping one of your thighs while the other man grabs the other. The two of them wrench them apart so Chenle can continue his work.

“You want me to make you cum?” he asks, lips brushing the tip of your ear. “Gonna make you finish so much today, and you’re gonna take it like the good little slut you are.”

You nod, dropping your head back on the cushions. “Please. Please.”

He moves your soaked panties to the side, sliding two fingers in with ease. His palm presses into your clit with every thrust of his hand, and his tongue licks along your pulse. The two men are much too strong, and any attempts to close your legs is futile.

Jaemin latches on to the other side of your neck, nipping the base of it. You try your best to rock your hips, but the magic happening inside you doesn’t require your help. It never does when it comes to them.

Chenle adds a third, breath shuddering at how easy you take it, how much the wetness gushes around his fingers.

“Look at you,” Jaemin whispers. “So good at taking what we give you.”

You can’t even come up with coherent words. You end up mumbling gibberish at him as the bubble starts to form. It takes one last brush of Chenle’s palm on your sensitive bud to send you flying over the edge, your back arching as a scream leaves your lips.

The three of you sit in silence for a moment, even as Chenle gently thrusts his hand to help you come down from your high. The only sound is your rough breathing.

Jaemin reaches up to caress your face. “Why don’t you go wait in the bedroom? We’ll be in in a second.”

Although the last thing you want to do is separate yourself from them, you stand on shaky legs anyway. Chenle quickly grabs a handful of your ass, squeezing it before giving it a rough smack.

You’re only alone for a couple minutes at most before they follow you in. Having them both in front of you and towering over you is intimidating this way, but you don’t shy away from them.

Chenle grabs a pillow from the bed, tossing it on the floor in front of Jaemin while the latter pulls his shirt over his head and starts undoing his pants.

“Didn’t want you to hurt your knees while you suck my cock,” Jaemin says, gesturing to the pillow. “Take your panties off and show me why you deserve to get fucked.”

You quickly do what he says, knees sinking into the soft fabric as your mouth waters at the sight of him pulling his pants down. You’re so concentrated on Jaemin, you almost don’t notice Chenle below you. His head rests down on the pillow, his hands already moving to explore the expanse of your legs.

“What are you doing?” Your face burns at the thousands of thoughts racing through you brain.

“None of that.” Jaemin grips your chin and lifts so you have to look at him. “Don’t pay him any attention when I need you like this.”

His shirt is absent from his chest, hard planes of muscle on display for you. You crave to lick him all over. He pushes his jeans and his boxers down his legs, eyes closing when you waste no time. You wrap your hand around his rock hard cock, jerking him slowly while you prepare yourself to take him in your mouth.

You take his tip in your mouth, swirling your tongue around. When you feel Chenle’s hands exploring the back of your thighs, you gasp. Jaemin uses the opportunity of your widened mouth to push himself further inside. He gently grips your hair, guiding you since you’re so distracted by what the other man is doing between your legs. You try to breathe through your nose, hollow your cheeks, do anything to aid in Jaemin’s pleasure, but your entire body shudders when Chenle squeezes your ass. You moan, reaching forward to grip Jaemin’s legs. That’s the only way you’ll keep yourself afloat between the both of them.

Your eyes water when Jaemin hits the back of your throat, causing it to constrict around him. He lets out a groan, his grasp tightening slightly. You feel Chenle shift below you, but you’re much too preoccupied to ask or see what he’s doing.

Hands still massaging your ass, Chenle presses a kiss to your throbbing clit. Your whine is barely heard while muffled by the cock thrusting into your mouth. Your knees wobble as Chenle flattens his tongue and licks up your slit, nails digging into your skin.

“That’s it, Princess,” Jaemin coos. “Your mouth is so perfect.”

You take initiative then, bobbing your head and taking him in as deep as you can while you grind down on Chenle’s tongue. Your moans increase in frequency as his lips wrap around your bud and his fingers circle your entrance.

Between the heavy cock on your tongue and the stimulation of your clit, your orgasm builds much faster than you anticipate. You never want this to be over. All you want is to be between them forever, feeling unimaginable pleasure at their hands.

“You’re doing so good,” Jaemin mutters.

You’re building and building and building, and then Chenle curls his fingers, and you scream around Jaemin. His hips buck involuntarily into your face, slamming his tip into the back of your throat. He pulls out of your mouth, chest heaving as he watches you crumble onto the man below you.

Chenle yanks you down until you’re sitting on his face, and he brings you down from your high gently.

“Fuck, that was close,” Jaemin groans, tugging his fingers through his hair. “Let her go now.”

One last lick to your entrance, and Chenle’s sliding out from under you, offering you help in standing up. His face glistens with your arousal, and unbelievably, it sends another wave of heat through your body. You kiss him, sighing at the taste of yourself on his lips.

Jaemin’s hands find your waist, squeezing you gently. “Get on the bed, baby. All fours.”

Your body is tingling from your recent orgasm when you pull away from Chenle to do as Jaemin says. Barely able to hold yourself up, you clench around nothing in excitement when the bed dips behind you.

They’re both out of sight, but you can always tell who’s touching you. Jaemin’s touches were soft and deliberate, and Chenle’s were rough and messy. Two completely different styles, but either way, they had you craving them both somehow.

“You ready for me?” Jaemin whispers, teasing your cunt with his cock. “You’re so fucking soaked.”

You only have to wonder about Chenle briefly, wondering where he’s at, because he climbs on the bed in front of you, the rest of his clothes shed and precum dripping from his tip. Your mouth waters all over again.

“Go easy on me, pretty girl.” Chenle bunches your hair in a ponytail. “I still want to fuck you when he’s done.”

Your eyes widen. Knowing Jaemin, there’s no way he’ll fuck you without making you cum. You’re already weak from the first two orgasms Chenle’s given to you, and the idea of four sounds so far-fetched. No way you’ll make it that many—your body would probably fall apart limb from limb.

Chenle taps the head of his cock against your lips, and you instinctively open your mouth for him. As he pushes in, Jaemin follows suit, both of them moving slowly, deliberately taking their sweet time in stretching you open to the max. Everything about this is perfect. Your wetness drips down your thighs and your toes curl and you feel so hazy and full.

You use your tongue to tease Chenle, stroking the underside of his cock and tracing along the prominent vein. Jaemin feels heavenly, his thick member plunging into you at a steady pace. Your legs and arms shake trying to keep yourself up. The last thing you should’ve done is tease Chenle, because he pushes himself so far into your mouth, he’s down your throat and your nose is against his pelvis.

“You’re too easy on her,” Chenle says to Jaemin, breath shuddering when you gag around him. “She’s just a little slut, begging to get fucked by both of us at the same time.”

Jaemin grips your hips, his working against you in fluid, steady motions. You feel them both everywhere. Even now, getting everything you wanted, you need more. The pleasure makes you delirious, your vision blurry and faded as Jaemin’s cock rubs against your walls in the most satisfying of ways. You lose track of how many sounds are muffled by Chenle.

“Fuck,” Jaemin murmurs. “She fucking like that. She just got so tight.”

“Told you.” Chenle lets out a short, breathy laugh as he quickens his pace.

Jaemin reaches around you, reaching down to find your clit. He never fails to touch you in a way so perfect, you’re ready to crumble within seconds. Your jaw and arms ache, but it only aids your experience.

Chenle pulls out of your mouth slowly, watching as a trail of spit stretches from your lips. Then he yanks your head back to make you look at him. The motion is so rough, tears spring into your eyes. You’re finally able to breathe properly, the whines, moans, and screams finally out in the air. He traces over your surely swollen lips with his thumb, gaze dark. Jaemin’s thrusts are met with lewd sounds of your wetness and skin slapping against skin.

“Be a good girl and cum for Jaem, slut.” Chenle tsks, pulling at your lip.

And you shatter, the loudest sound you’ve ever made escaping from you as Jaemin fucks you steady through your third orgasm. You can barely breathe, gasping as you quake. It doesn’t take long for Jaemin to follow suit, two more thrusts before he holds you against him, spilling deep inside you.

“As fun as the show has been,” Chenle begins, letting go of your hair. “I’m gonna need a turn before my balls fucking burst.”

Your arms can no longer keep you up, so your face falls into the mattress. Overstimulation has tears running down your cheeks, but nothing matters to you except finishing what you started.

Jaemin gives himself a second before he pulls out of you. He continues to hold your hips up until Chenle’s able to take his spot. Massaging your ass, he gives you a little bit to calm down.

“Be careful,” Jaemin mutters to Chenle.

You imagine the glare the latter gives in return.

“She’ll tell me if it’s too much.” He traces a finger up your spine. “Wouldn’t you?”

Unable to speak, you nod fervently, pushing back to encourage him. You’ve never been so overwhelmed in your life, but you craved more. A whimper falls from your lips as Chenle prods at your entrance.

“I know, baby,” he murmurs, gently scratching up and down your back. “You’re so fucking sexy, you know that? Wanting my cock when another man’s cum is still leaking out of you.”

You push back further, yearning for the stretch. They’re similar sizes, but Chenle’s thicker just enough for you to notice. No coherent thoughts swirl in your mind as you turn your head to look at Jaemin across the room.

His boxers are back on, and a tiny glimpse of worry spreads across his face. Your eyes roll all the way back as Chenle slides inside, every nerve-ending in your body on fire. He’s surprisingly gentle with you, barely rocking his hips to help you adjust to him and the sensitivity.

Jaemin makes his way over to you. Kneeling by the edge of the bed so he’s right in front of you. Your walls flutter incessantly around Chenle’s cock.

“You take us so well.” He brushes your hair stuck to your forehead from the sweat. “We’ll take care of you, Princess. You just gotta cum one more time, then we’ll take such good care of you.”

You whine at the thought of a fourth orgasm, but you nod. Jaemin’s thumb brushes your cheek, swiping away the tears. His lips meet yours, easily prying yours open so he can slide his tongue in your mouth. A low sound emanates from Chenle as his grip on you tightens. He thrusts faster, desperate for your attention, slamming himself inside you regardless of sensitivity.

You tremble, fisting the sheets as you cry out into Jaemin’s mouth. He stays put, but Chenle picks up his pace, his throbbing cock fucking you open.

“Good girl,” Chenle groans, his voice borderline whiny. Through his steady pace, his balls slap your clit with every thrust. You jolt each time, the sensitivity wreaking havoc on your body the closer you get.

When you explode around him, it’s sudden and quick. You hold onto the back of Jaemin’s neck, whimpering and gasping for air as if you can’t breathe. Chenle stutters, the clamp of your walls making him dig his fingers into your ass.

An elongated moan leaves his mouth as he bursts inside you. He stays inside you for a moment to allow himself to calm down. When he finally pulls out, he guides your practically limp body down to the mattress. Your chest heaves while you try to catch your breath, but the only thing you feel anymore is the overwhelming urge to fall asleep.

“You okay, baby?” Jaemin asks, tilting his head. “You know you look so pretty like this, right? With your lips swollen, eyes red and drooping…To think we made you this way…” he trails off, humming to himself.

When Chenle comes back, he’s got his boxers on and a towel in his hand. He turns you over, moving the cloth between your legs. You whine when it rubs against your sensitive bud, and Chenle whispers an apology to you.

“You should really take a bath or you’ll be sticky all night,” Chenle says as he wipes down your legs.

You shake your head.

Jaemin chuckles, a tiny smile gracing his face as he regards you. “Look how tired she is.”

Chenle does his best to clean you up, and then he moves over you to give you a gentle kiss. You sigh in content, relishing in one of the rare moments of Chenle’s affection.

When it comes to after any given activity, Chenle always stays with you. He curls up in bed with you and kisses your face until both of you are ready to fall asleep.

Jaemin, on the other hand, is the opposite. At the beginning, it was your mutual understanding that one of you would leave.

Today, Jaemin watches as Chenle settles next to you, intrigued even more so when you curl into his chest and let out a deep breath. He decides he isn’t going to be the odd man out, so he joins.

The three of you sleep with limbs so tangled, you barely know who they belong to anymore.

#nct imagines #nct dream #nct #nct scenarios #nct dream smut #chenle #na jaemin #jaemin #zhong chenle #jaemle smut #chenle smut #chenle x reader #chenle imagines #jaemin imagines #jaemin smut

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lover-of-mine · 1 month

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Me? Wanting to talk about the locker room scene in comparison to the cemetery scene to make a point no one asked about? Raise your hand if you saw this is coming 🙋‍♀️

Anyway, this is madness written by a gifmaker/video editor who hates coloring the cemetery scene with a burning passion and who spent the better part of the past 2 days trying to make a coloring work for the locker room scene, who also did some asking around with other editors who also seem to be having issues with the scene, and who spends way too much time thinking about Buck and death (someone drown that man, please).

I'm gonna start this off by saying that I don't really believe the cemetery scene will be directly addressed on the show no matter how much I wish it would. But something about the cemetery scene besides the actual content of the scene that keeps me up at night and had me writing multiple fics dealing with it, is the fact that the sky is only blue behind Eddie.

Why is that relevant in any way, shape, or form? The colors when the focus is on Buck or both of them have this almost yellowish tone that the focus on Eddie doesn't have. The sky and colors strongly imply that they added a filter to it in post-production to ensure the colors looked like that, along with the fact that it is a scene that's really weird to color something that happens when they go too hard on the filters *cough* crossover *cough* pilot *cough*. What does that have to do with the locker room? The locker room also has this almost yellowish tone that makes it hell to color. But based on my 2 days of testing different colorings and techniques, it seems to be a hell of a lot worse when the shot has that wall over there where the sun is hitting as a background.

That suggests that they wanted the scenes to have a specific lighting that they achieved later. Considering the way that the tendency of the cemetery is that the colors get muted or weirdly blended together and that the locker room goes YELLOW, I am assuming that they messed with the colors on the cemetery to make the colors look faded, giving it that gloomy feeling, which in turn made the sky almost white, and that they needed that sunlight reflecting on the wall to look that bright, which made the scene look a lot more yellow than it should. Seriously, trying to work this out I legit make it look like Buck is a Simpsons character.

Okay, but Anna, why did you make this particular connection? Well, the word is muted when Buck is talking about starting to date Natalia and then the sun gets brighter when he talks about them breaking up? COME ON. He's calling the relationship boring and the word literally gets brighter as he says it, madness.

Buck talking about dating Natalia -> Buck talking about breaking up with Natalia (please don't judge the gifs I don't want the stress of coloring them combined right now lol)

But that's the same reaction. Dude is smiling going in, he's smiling going out.

And considering Buck's relationship with his own death and the way I strongly believe that what drew him to Natalia was the fact that she didn't think his death was a tragedy and he wasn't ready to deal with the reality of had happened to him yet, to get him to the point where death is boring is progress. Makes me fear for my Buck breakdown wishes, but it is progress for that particular aspect of Buck, considering he has a very intricate relationship with death down to the fact he was born as a hail mary to prevent it. We have multiple near-death experiences, we have him saving the lives of people loves multiple times, the first time we see him he's saving a kid who drowned, his first big conflict is the fact that he's not handling not being able to save someone's life all that well, I can keep going, but you see my point, right?

The arc with Natalia, even though we didn't see the originally planned conclusion since the actress couldn't come back, had this point of Buck looking at what happened to him through the eyes of someone who didn't know him before and was actually excited about that happening, so he could distance himself from what happened and look at it from a "safe" distance. That distance also allowed him to ignore the very important "I need to do this for myself" thing from the coma dream because Buck is terrified of being alone, and that definitely includes the fear of finding out who he is by himself. Buck is bad at being alone, from meaningless sex, to hanging on to Abby too long, to hanging on to Taylor too long, to jumping in with Natalia, the first pretty girl who looked his way, it all makes this part of him very clear (parenthesis because I just had a thought, yes, Buck latches on to Taylor out of fear of being alone triggered by Eddie almost dying, but he thought he could have died himself considering the crane and everything about it and also the way he could very much have been shot at the same time as Eddie, he latched on to Natalia because he did die, he also almost died on his first date with Abby and Abby actually reached out to him when he was feeling all sorts of bad over someone dying, and he is held at gunpoint and watched a death that deeply affected him before he started dating Ali, so we have death as a connection here too, if that makes sense, I might have to come back to this thought later).

But the thing is, when you look at 6a for Buck considering the fact that Buck is passively suicidal, in a very I'm not trying to get killed but I don't think I don't care if I do die way, and how he probably thought he was going to die in a blaze of glory saving someone, and how he actually died in a pretty run-of-the-mill call, by something no one has any control over it, Buck's relationship with what he thought death was and would be for him changed. For one, Buck was not ready for how much it affected everyone around him, he never considered what the grief of losing him would do to the people he loves, but also, Buck's main excuse for his near-death experiences/impulsive behavior that puts him in mortal danger was "but I didn't actually die" like with the blood clots or "I didn't get the worst of it" like with the shooting, I think even the tsunami a little bit with how he felt about losing Chris. But he did actually die, and considering the fact that he went up that ladder when Chimney was ready to go up and Eddie also got hit by the lightning, he also got the worst of it. So he lost his own coping mechanism.

So he arrived at a point where death is boring and he is smiling like an idiot at Eddie welcoming him "back to the world of the living" and that could have fun implications going forward. Because, one, he still hasn't dealt with a big emotion in a healthy way, and two, Bobby is in mortal danger. Considering his reaction to Bobby being dead in his coma world and the fact that he has no coping mechanism left when it comes to death anymore along with his own relationship with water and danger we could have some fun reactions to these types of triggers for him there.

And thinking about the way Oliver keeps talking about Buck learning more about himself and also about Buck leaning on Eddie, someone who had his own journey dealing with multiple layers of his relationship with death, they have a fun space to play with there, with Buck's relationship with death, Eddie's relationship with Buck's death, and everything else that could happen with Eddie fully dealing with Shannon's death, and Buck dealing with anything really, Daniel, his own death, his fear of being alone, all as someone who actually wants to live, who's not just moving because he's alive and has no other alternative.

That's it for today, as always, if you reached this I love you 💜

#im going to bed now #911 meta #911 spoilers #911 speculation #buck

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lattaeyongs · 2 years

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summer of love (ljn)

original gif

↳ pairing: lee jeno x reader

↳ word count: 15.2k

↳ genre: ‘90’s!au, brother’s best friend!au, summer!au, neighbor!au, slice of life(ish)!au, fluff, slowburn

↳ summary: The summer of 1997 was a weird time. As a person living in the modern era, you’d completely forgotten what it was like to live in the ‘90’s. In May 1997, you listened to the Backstreet Boys, flipped through TV Guide, and had an answering machine which seems so archaic now. But that isn’t the only reason why the summer of 1997 was weird. That summer was the time you fell for your brother’s best friend.

↳ warnings: minor cursing, making out

SUMMER 1997

Your second year of college is over. You’ve taken your last exam, and it’s finally time to ditch your dorm and lousy roommate to go back to your childhood home for the summer. It’s a three-hour drive with no rest stops from college to your home, but it took longer due to the gas station stops to get junky, sugary snacks and coffee. But eventually, you made it back home in one piece.

Your childhood home looks almost exactly the same as you left it: The old, green, flowery wallpaper that your parents keep forgetting the change still hangs in the kitchen, the brown carpet in the entry hallway with the weird stain is still there, and the pantry still has an endless supply of potato chips. The only thing missing are your parents.

“Y/N!” Renjun exclaims, coming to hug you. As your older brother's arms lock around you, you notice how different he feels despite last seeing him only two months ago; prickly stubble pokes at your skin, and he definitely has been working out.

He parts from you, moving to the answering machine sitting on the kitchen counter. “Where are mom and dad?” You ask.

“Out,” he says abruptly, playing the messages in the machine before clearing them out. “They’re shopping to make dinner. They thought you would come back later. And by the way,” he continues, “Jeno’s coming over.”

“Okay,” you respond back simply. At this point, you’re used to Lee Jeno; he’s practically your family, in that the Lees live only a few houses from yours. It is honestly a wonder how Renjun and Jeno have remained friends since they were five-year-olds running around the neighborhood grafitti-ing the sidewalks with colorful chalk designs without growing apart or finding people more apt to suit their developing selves as time passes. It seems that instead of growing apart because of the new scenes and sounds in their adult lives, they were growing together like two parallel vines despite the distance they had to combat in college. When you hear the doorbell a few moments later, you know it’s Lee Jeno.

He certainly looks different than what you remember with dark hair this time and a slight tan. You haven’t seen Lee Jeno since winter break when he was staying with his parents across the street. Just like you and Renjun, he’s back home from college after the school year, and you’ve seen him around a couple of times a year with all the school breaks.

“Y/N!” Jeno smiles in that very Jeno way that makes everyone’s heart melt. He leans down a bit to meet your eyes, taking his thumb and forefinger of his hand and squishing your cheek. You playfully bat his hand away.

“Quit doing that!” You giggle with a pout on your face. “I’m not a baby anymore! I go to college!” You say incredulously, a little bit of a whine in your tone.

“You’re always a baby to me,” he teases. You roll your eyes at this, moving over to let him in.

“Jeno!” Renjun yells, ditching the answering machine. He rushes over to hug the other boy. “It’s good to see you.”

“You too Jun,” Jeno replies. You smile at the sight.

“Let’s play pool,” Renjun says. Jeno agrees, nodding. Both boys go to the basement where your family’s famous pool table resides (your father having gotten it for free from some bar closing in the ‘70’s), and Jeno shuts the door loudly on his way out. You’re about to rain on Renjun’s parade and tell him to come back and clear the answering machine he left behind, but you think against it. You didn’t feel like interrupting a friendship that is so beautiful. So you sit on the chair that Renjun recently left, pressing the ‘listen’ button on the answering machine.

As you listen to the promotional spam calls from companies trying to sell you things that you didn’t need or couldn’t afford, you purse your lips. Seeing Renjun and Jeno together almost made you jealous; none of your high school friends were back from college, and through the few calls you all would have during the school year, they’re off doing bigger and better things than this sleepy town that you call home.

That night you were going to sleep in your bedroom filled with cassette tapes, posters and pink and yellow wallpaper that you picked out when you were seven. After satisfactorily wrapping yourself in your comfortable blankets that smelled of lavender detergent (your favorite scent), you stare at the ceiling. You couldn’t imagine not visiting this place.

So you have a secret. No, not of the deep dark kind, but something that would definitely earn you a lot of teasing if your friends and family found out about it. One of your biggest guilty pleasures is the movie series The Zygon Kingdom, a science fiction franchise about alien invasions. Stereotypically, people think this series is for losers, gamers, and nerds who live in their mom’s basement. When you’re in public, you try your best to refrain from comment or make fun of the series alongside others, but in private, you secretly anticipate the new movies, going to see it immediately when it comes to theaters.

And that’s what you’re planning on doing today. Today is the release of the fifth movie of the franchise, The Zygon Kingdom: A New World. Finally, you actually had plans; you were starting to look pathetic with how much TV you were watching; your parents were even joking that the most recent book that you’ve read is the TV Guide that was mailed a few days ago. On top of not having friends to hang out with this summer, Renjun, a fresh graduate from a pre-law program, has been running around town trying to find positions to start paying off his degree debts and to gain experience while also trying to study for the LEET exam to qualify for law school. All your friends and family being busy would be depressing to you on any normal day, this comes to your advantage today, for you don’t want to be seen.

“I’m going to see a friend. Love you.” You say quickly to your parents. With how immersed they are in Full House, their marked TV Guide beside them, you could have said that you wanted to get a tattoo, and your parents would probably not bat an eye.

“Okay, be safe honey,” your mother says dismissively.

Leaving through the basement, you go to your car outside, unlocking the door. Obviously, you’re carrying your big tote bag so you could sneak in snacks; you even went shopping at the convenience store to prepare. Once you’re finished with the ten minute drive from your home to the movie theater, you look in both directions before entering the line in the lobby of the theater to get a ticket. You’re going to pay in cash, not credit to make sure that this can’t be traced back to you, and you pull out a large flopping hat that you have saved in your car, placing it on your head the second you step out of the car. Yes, you were being completely paranoid, but the last thing you want is someone recognizing you as you go into the movie theater or your parents looking at your credit card statement to see that you went to the movie theaters to view The Zygon Kingdom.

The time you spent waiting in line is filled with you looking around in all directions, making sure to avoid gazes of anyone that went to high school with or parents whose kids you babysat. Gossip travels fast, and you didn’t feel like finding out how fast. This is a whole covert operation – you get in and you get out, hopefully with your reputation still intact.

“One ticket to the new Zygon movie,” you say quietly. The woman sitting at the counter almost doesn’t hear you because of how quiet you are or how loud the chatters are of high schoolers and adults coming to the movie theaters after a long week, but either way, she gives you your ticket.

“It’s in room B,” You’ve gone to this movie theater enough to know where everything is without needing a map or extra time to find your way around. Since you took into account Friday night traffic and the length of the line, you have about five minutes before the movie starts.

“Thank you,” you say, smiling quickly. Keeping your head low, you move your neck around as if your head is a moving surveillance camera, still trying to make sure that no one you know is seeing you walk into room B, which has a huge blue and yellow poster of The Zygon Kingdom: A New World right next to the door. Once the coast is clear, you head into the dark movie room, finding row sixteen, in the middle.

“Excuse me, excuse me,” you whisper to people who you had to cross to get to your seat. The room is at half capacity; a few advertisements are playing on the screen, for now you have three minutes before the movie starts (but it will probably be longer since ads play for at least ten minutes after the movie is supposed to start to give people extra time). You find a spot in the middle row, which is where the majority of those few people are because you can get a good view of the screen and the audio would be loud but not too loud.

Pushing down the foldable seat, you sit down. Bringing your purse to your lap, you pull out a bag of chips from your bag, opening it before the movie so that no one gets annoyed at you for opening it so loud. You adjust your sitting position, letting your left leg cross over your right one, and in the dark room, you accidentally kick the seat in front of you. It’s a loud sound, and you slightly grimace at the pain in your foot now. The person in front of you turns around, and you feel like you lost the air in your lungs.

“Jeno?”

“Y/N?”

After the movie incident, you and Jeno realize that you actually have more in common than you thought. Apparently, Jeno is in the same position as you when it comes to high school or local friends. Just graduated from college, his friends have found well-paying starting positions and internships, and except for a few people, he’s also been bored at home. Instead of finding a job immediately or stretching himself thin like Renjun, Jeno decided that it was best for him to take a break mentally after college, and then he would be on the job hunt. So now you two have been much more inclined to meet up.

This would have never happened a year ago. Sure, you would hang out with Jeno when Renjun invited you to hang out with them, and you would even have a good time, but by yourselves, you were a bit more than strangers. Now that doesn’t seem so.

“I still can’t believe that you like the Zygon Kingdom. Liking the Zygon Kingdom is so not you.” You say, grinning at Jeno. “I would never have pegged you as a fan,” You and Jeno are at an ice cream parlor, enjoying the shelter of this building better than the merciless afternoon sun outside. Lee Jeno, a college soccer star who gets all the girls liking a cheesy science fiction movie? That’s not something you learn every day. Picking at his chocolate ice cream, Jeno smiles at you too.

“I could say the same for you.” Taking a bite of your ice cream, you cross your legs under the table, a slightly pensive look on your face. Leaning forward, you put your elbows on the white table. “So what else do I not know about you?” You ask.

“Well,” Jeno tilts his head. “I like to dip my pizza in honey.”

“I know that,” you say. “Back when you and Renjun used to order pizza at the house, you would always ask me where the honey is.”

“You remember that?” Jeno asks, surprised. You shake your head, a disapproving frown on your face. “I only remember because you’re the only person in the history of humankind to dip your pizza in honey. Honestly, how do you even stomach that?”

“The same way you can eat that mint chocolate chip ice cream you have here,” he says, pointing to your cup. You gasp in mock offense, and he only continues. “That stuff tastes like toothpaste.”

“To make up for what you just said, you have to tell me something that I actually don’t know about you.” Jeno grunts and this, and you wait, tapping your foot against the tiles annoyingly.

“When I was a sophomore in high school, I went to one of Ten’s house parties,” he stops for a few seconds, and you look at him, your gaze willing for him to continue. “He brought in eight kegs of beer from God knows where, and I had a few drinks.”

“Shut up!” You say, pushing Jeno’s shoulder from across the table. You’re absolutely astonished. “You, Lee Jeno, student council representative for your entire high school career, got drunk while going to Ten’s parties?” You only know Ten through his reputation, specifically his outrageous house parties that he throws whenever his parents are out of town that almost always end with the cops coming to shut it down. They’re always the highlight of your high school class’s weekend in your sleepy little town, where the mall or the park are the most interesting places to go. You’ve never been to one of Ten’s parties yourself since in high school, you were never much of a partier (and you didn’t have the ‘contacts’ to get invited anyway), but you’ve heard that he’s the definition of a privileged rich kid with money to burn.

“Yes, that was me.” he laughs. “And, it gets better.” You lean farther forward, your cheek propped up by your fist. “I was so drunk that I couldn’t drive home, so I called Renjun at like midnight to pick me up. When I came into his car, it smelled like perfume, and he had lipstick all over his face. Yeri Kim was in the back of his car.”

Your eyes widened. “No way! Renjun told me he was studying for a history test!” You remember this day in-depth because it was the night of the freshman dance that you went to with your friends.

Jeno smiles at your astonished look before clearing his throat. “I told you something you didn’t know about me and something you didn’t know about Renjun, so you better tell me something good that I didn’t know about you.”

You sigh, tilting your head upwards. Pushing your tongue against your cheek, you’re deep in thought before you spring up in your chair again.

“Remember when you, me, and Mark would all volunteer at Taeyong’s animal shelter?” You ask. During your high school years, you were in desperate need of Honors Society hours to make you look better on your college applications, so you ended up signing up to take care of unadopted pets, either rescue or lost. Jeno, Renjun, and a few of his other friends had the same idea since it would be easy to carpool.

“Yeah?” Jeno responds. Bringing your palm against your mouth, you shelter some giggles before Jeno has a curious look on his face.

“Y/N? What is it?” You lick your lips before inhaling sharply.

“While getting in the parking lot with Renjun to get something from your car, do you remember getting hit by a bunch of water balloons?” Jeno squints for a few seconds as if trying to connect some invisible dots, and after a few moments, his eyes widen, his mouth in an “o” shape.

“That was you?” He says, astonished. “I blamed Chenle for that for an entire year!”

“Yup, it was me,” you say, giggling in between words.

“Why did you do it?” He asks.

“It was supposed to be for Renjun, but then you got in the way, and by that time, I already dropped the water balloons.” Jeno purses his lips, as if trying to picture you in the situation you described. This only leads you into another laughing fit.

“You should have seen your face, I will never forget how hilarious you looked and how you were like ‘Chenle if you’re working the dog walking on the ceiling, then I’m gonna kill you!’” You snicker, imitating Jeno’s voice by making it abnormally deep.

“I do not sound like that.”

“I do not sound like that,” you imitate again. Jeno crosses his arms, a brow quirked.

“Okay, I’ll actually stop this time,” you say, giggling.

After a few moments, Jeno laughs with you. The prospect of no friends in town seemed unfounded today, for there is a friend for you that has been sitting under your nose this whole time.

You’re sitting cross-legged on your bedroom floor as you organize your colorful array of CDs, different albums you’ve collected through various birthday monies and Christmas gifts. Not only are there CDs, but your shelf is loaded with cassettes. By this point, no one used cassettes anymore, but it was the easiest way to record songs from the tape radio and have to listen. You would simply put the cassette in your tape radio and press the ‘record’ button when radio stations would have their two hours ad free music. A mini cassette of free music was perfect to put in Renjun’s old walkman as you took a jog around the neighborhood. You learned this method two years ago from your father, who used this way to get free music in the ‘80’s, but now, you have a huge collection of songs that have become a pain to oragnize. You’re not exactly good at putting things back in their place, tending to grab your CDs and cassettes, use them, and then discard them on top of the little shelf you have.

Point is, this is an arduous task. This is why when you hear the phone ring in the living room, you run out to get it. Plus, if you didn’t answer it now, it would be your task to clear out the answering machine at the end of the day. So, now you had one less message to listen and clear out.

When you hold the house phone to your ear, you only hear a monotonous dial tone, signalling that the person hung up. You feel a little suspicious, but think nothing of it; sometimes, neighborhood kids find it funny to dial random numbers and not answering when the person picks up – like virtual ding-dong-ditching.

But your suspicion proves right when you feel wetness on your head. On the floor of your living room is a deflated balloon, and in your hair, you’re pretty sure it’s water. There’s only one person you think could be behind this, and he slowly comes out from the space he’s hiding in your kitchen. He smirks as he shows you a small corded phone connected to the wall, shaped like a lip (probably Jeno’s sister’s that he stole from her room). Before you can grab him in your kitchen, Jeno is running out onto the street.

“Lee Jeno what the hell?” You screech to the boy running down the street. You don’t bother to take your shoes, only closing the front door to prevent any animals coming into your house to take shelter from this hot weather. The heated pavement sings the soles of your feet as you run, but the feeling doesn’t bother you: you’re on a hot (literally hot) pursuit of Lee Jeno, and in the distance, you can see him.

“Damn these short legs,” you mutter. You run and you run through the neighborhood. Lee Jeno has you taking sudden turns, trying to get you to break your tail on him, but it’s unsuccessful. Finally when you’re close enough, you spring forward onto Jeno’s back. He sways at the sudden weight, falling to the ground. Thankfully, you’re on grass, which is cooler to the pads of your feet and breaks Jeno’s fall.

“What was the meaning of this?” You ask, pointing to your dripping head.

“It’s a little something called payback.” He smirks.

“Hey, there’s a difference,” you start off, “Mine was on accident. It was supposed to hit Renjun. Your’s was on purpose.” You cross your arms, pouting.

“Well, then this was supposed to teach you not to be mean to your brother.”

“Siblings in the same age group act like this all the time,” you say. You then put your index to your chin. “At least if you’re like me and Renjun.” If Jeno pulled something like this on his older sister Jihyeon, who is six years older than him, he wouldn’t survive to tell the tale.

The boy in front of you sucks in a big breath. “Let’s settle this once and for all then,” Jeno says. He comes closer, his body only a few inches from yours. “A game.” He smiles. “I have some water balloons at home. If you win–”

“You have to give me 20,000 won.” You finish. Jeno raises his eyebrow. “There’s a new Backstreet Boys album I want,” you say.

“Alright, fine,” Jeno says. “But if you lose,” Jeno stops midway, trying to bite his lower lip in a way to shelter the huge smirk on his face. “You have to clean my car.”

“Too easy, all I’ll need is a hose,” you wave your hand.

“Not the outside.” Your eyes widen at this new development.

“You mean…”

“Yup. The inside.” You’ve never been in Jeno’s car yourself since mostly when you would hang out with Jeno, it would be with Renjun, which means that you’re using Renjun’s car. But Renjun has told you, pretty infamously, that his car is messy and smells like a giant foot.

“That’s cruel and unusual punishment!” You say. Let’s just say if Renjun thinks it’s smelly, it’s probably smelly. Renjun has been a teenage boy before, and many teenage boys are a species that usually cannot detect the lack of hygiene.

“Those are the parameters of the game,” Jeno says. “If you resign now, that’s considered a loss, which means you have to clean my car anyway.”

You flatten your lips. Damn, you’re in a deadlock now.

“Fine. Game on.”

Lee Jeno destroyed you. But honestly, what else did you expect? Lee Jeno, who has played soccer his whole life and has had plenty of experience with strategy and planning, completely and utterly destroyed you. It wasn’t the smartest idea to go guns-blazing with water balloons at Jeno, but you didn’t have many other choices. Your long-distance aim and contact skills weren’t that good, for you never played “sports,” sports as in competitive sports since you only danced for a couple of years. You did use your surroundings well, hiding behind trees and bushes so you can stalk your way to Jeno, but that only did so much.

So now you are wearing an old T-Shirt and some jeans shorts, opening the front door and performing the ‘walk of shame’ as you walk to Jeno’s house, where boxes of unopened trash bags, air freshener, sponges, and soapy water sit.

Jeno is only a few feet away from the cleaning materials he left out, sitting on a beach chair.

“Y/N,” Jeno says, waving to you in a friendly way. “Thank God you’re here. I was worried you might happen to forget about the deal. I really need you right now,” Jeno chuckles, “because my mom wanted me to clean my car last week. She said that if I don’t clean my car by tonight, then she’s really gonna give it to me.”

“Good,” you say, laughing a bit to yourself. “Somebody’s gotta tell you. Back in high school, I was afraid to get in this car, or else I would never be the same again.”

Scrunching your nose, you peek your head inside Jeno’s car. It’s an old 1984 Nissan 300zx, most likely used because if his parents are anything like your parents (which not so surprisingly, growing up around each other, they are), they would never give their teenage sons brand new cars. The people in your neighborhood certainly aren’t tearing at the seams with money.

Gulping harshly, you decide to throw whatever junk you find in the car away. You pulled out wrappers, chip bags, old water bottles, and random coins that you pocketed (Jeno let you since even he knows how bad cleaning his car is – which is why he held off on it for so long). Jeno kept you good company, and you found yourself chitchatting with him as you organized every piece of junk in his car in a trash bag.

“Are you liking college so far?” Jeno asks broadly when chatter between you both slowly dies. No response.

“What’s wrong?” Jeno asks. He knows he’s right to think that when it takes you a few minutes to respond, a few moments for your gaze to focus on him.

“College hasn’t been that fun,” you confess to Jeno, the words falling out of your mouth faster than it should. “I haven’t made a lot of friends despite finishing my sophomore year, and my roommate is a pain. Her entire side of the room is so messy and acts like I’m unreasonable. It’s a small space anyway, she should keep it clean!” You huff, scrubbing the cloth seats in Jeno’s car harder. It felt as though a huge weight has been lifted off of your shoulders.

You were surprised that you confessed this to Jeno of all people. When you told Renjun this freshman year, he advised that it would get better after the first semester, and your parents said the same thing, but nothing really changed. You’re going to university on a significant scholarship, and you didn’t want to give that up if you decided to transfer somewhere closer to home, closer to your support network of familiar places and people. Ever since then, you didn’t tell anyone how miserable you were in college.

“Can I make a confession?” Jeno asks suddenly. You were worried that you were being way too personal after Jeno didn’t say anything for a while; after all, Jeno is your brother’s friend and not yours.

“Shoot,” you say.

“I didn’t have many friends in college either. Why do you think I always hang out with Renjun every summer?” You’re piling all the trashbags together near the edge of the Lee property for the trash truck to come later today, but hearing this is enough for you to turn around and look at the raven-haired boy quizically.

“I don’t believe that,” you scoff. “You have teammates and a hundred girls who would tattoo your name on their chests immediately.”

“They’re just teammates and girls. I got along with my teammates, but I don’t talk to them on a regular basis after graduating college.” Jeno sighs. “And the girls who liked me in college liked me because I was ripped. None of them really wanted to know me personally.”

The silence between you both is deafening. You purse your lips, sympathy in your voice. “I had no idea.”

“Most people don’t,” Jeno says. “I try not to tell everyone this,” he says, a slight humorous lilt in his voice.

“Those girls missed out,” you say, a soft smile on your face. “You’re hilarious and great to be around.”

“It seems like I have that effect on the members of the Huang family,” Jeno smiles, any sign of melancholy gone from his face.

“Say,” you start off, bending down to reach the mat on the car floor. “if I find something I think is of value in this car, then can I keep it?”

Jeno nods. “Sure, I guess. I can’t imagine what could be of value.”

“Now I’m 20,000 won richer,”

Jeno’s back instantly becomes more rigid as he sees you wave a few crumpled bills in the air, almost unrecognizable due to the amount of dust and grime accumulated on it. A couple of coins here and there were tolerable for him to let you keep, but 20,000 won is a lot for loose change in the car. “I tend to find 20,000 won very valuable,” you smile.

Jeno curses under his breath. “Touche.”

“I guess we both won.” You shrug your shoulders, “You’re gonna have a clean car for your mom, and I have enough money to buy that Backstreet Boys album.”

Just the other day, you ran into Taeyong, the owner of the pet shelter you used to volunteer at. You were at the supermarket, picking up some groceries for your parents when you saw the man carefully weighing a bag of Roma tomatoes. Although he is almost five years older than you, it certainly doesn’t seem that way with how youthful his face looked, and when he noticed you putting bananas in your shopping cart, he was glad to see you. You both engaged in pleasant conversation about your lives since you volunteered at his pet shelter, and he mentioned to you that he was short of hands. Recently, a full-time employee quit, and he needed people more than ever. He offered you a job on the spot, and you gladly took it – you needed something to do this summer anyway, and your parents were starting to get a little restless with how much you were at home, revolving your life around TV Guide.

You had been working for a few days at the store and got to know the two other employees, one of which is Doyoung, who you already knew from your time volunteering at this shelter, and Sungchan, a boy around Jeno’s age who had been working for a year. Compared to the last time you saw this shelter as a senior in high school, not much has changed. The only thing that was different was that the walls were recently wallpapered.

Taeyong greeted you when you walked in, and you already started following a routine you set up for yourself; the good thing about hiring you was that he didn’t have to teach you much since as a volunteer, you would feed and wash animals a couple of hours a week, which as an employee, that was the same thing on a fuller time basis. In the mornings, you liked to start off walking dogs in the dog walking area on the roof before the sun would shine mercilessly in the afternoon. Carrying a light brown golden retriever puppy named Dasom, you head down the roof stairs back to the lobby, where Jeno is sitting on a hard, metal chair.

“Jeno?” You ask. “What are you doing here?” You don’t ever remember telling him that you would be here.

Jeno smiles at you. “Your mom told me I could find you here. And some other guy said you were walking a dog, so he told me to wait here.”

You nod. He must not have meant Doyoung since he would already know him from his time at the pet shelter in high school. “So you must have met Sungchan.”

Jeno shrugs his shoulders. “Yeah, I guess. He said he was going to wash some of the new arrivals.” While speaking, Jeno’s lips curled into a small smile. “Remember when we used to do that?”

“God,” you say, shaking your head. “That was one of the worst jobs.” You said. If there was anything that dogs and cats hated was being in water. New arrivals, especially strays, haven’t been introduced to clean water in a long time and can get especially rowdy since they are also untrained.

“There was one dog that me, Renjun, and Chenle had to wash, and let’s just say that it looked like we took a bath too!” At this, you both laugh.

You lick your lips, looking at Jeno, good humor in your eyes. “I almost feel bad leaving Sungchan all by himself.” Crossing your arms and leaning your back against the wall, you look at Jeno, your head cocked.

“So what are you really doing here?”

Jeno looks fondly in the distance. “I think Bongshik needs a new playmate,” you smile at Jeno. For as long as you can remember, Jeno has always been a cat person, and after much convincing, his parents agreed to get him a cat seven years ago. They initially were only getting Jeno the cat to help teach him responsibility, because as a teenage boy, he had none, but slowly, Bongshik grew on them too. Ever since, the Lee family’s soft spot has been Bongshik.

“Do your parents know?” You ask.

Jeno smiles. “They were the ones who suggested the idea.” As Bongshik grew older, his energy hasn’t quelled, and for the lack of neighborhood cats, he follows the Lee family around everywhere in the house.

“What breed?” you ask.

“Maybe a Bengal. I’ve heard that they are energetic.”

“I think there are some Bengals. Let’s check the back.” You both go into the room adjoining the lobby, where the rescue and stray animals were stored. After a long night with Doyoung yesterday, the cages were cleaned, and all the animals looked happy that it was clean. You both are greeted with excited barks from the dog section of the room, and finally, you approach the cats in another room. Cats of various breeds occupied the segregated space, from Shorthairs to Bobtailed cats. Black, white, gray, and tabbies are all present, and they look at you and Jeno quizically.

Jeno also observes the felines intently. “Actually, Bongshik is full of energy, so maybe a bit of a quieter playmate to contrast,” Jeno taps his chin, thinking to himself. Some cats wave their tails at Jeno as if wanting his attention while some other cat mothers wrap their tails around their young, protecting them. There are two cats that seem to take his attention, two cats that are sitting together. They don’t appear to have any sort of genetic or familial relationship, for one cat is white with a few specks of black around the ears while the other is a gray tabby with a white chest; they both appear to be Shorthair crossbreeds, though.

“Can I hold that one?” Jeno says, pointing to the white one with the few black specks. You open the cage with the master key that you have in your pocket, and carefully, you take the cat out of the cage. Jeno has his arms open, so when you place the cat in his arms, he cradles the animal, the most adoring look on his face. The other cat seems to be annoyed and meows a lot, its gaze on the white cat, and the white cat starts meowing back.

You and Jeno both melt on sight.

“So cute,” Jeno murmurs, putting the tip of his nose on the crown of the white cat’s head. This cat does not seem to be bothered that it’s being held by Jeno (when most cats take some time getting used to a new human). It is as if they were both destined to meet. This cat does turn to face his companion still in the cage once in a while, still meowing.

“I think this one’s more concerned that its friend is not being held,” you jest. You stand on your tiptoes to grab the other, carefully cradling the tabby in your arms. It starts meowing for its companion, and you face Jeno.

“This one’s also so cute,” Jeno says longingly. He comes closer to you, bending a little, his face close to the tabby that you’re holding. His smile is wide, his eyes shaped like crescents. Carefully, he holds the white cat with one cradled arm, and with the other, he uses his index and middle finger to pet the other cat. The tabby meows happily.

As Jeno tries to stand upright again, his head almost bumps your face, but he stops before that, carefully meeting your gaze. For what feels like an eternity, you both stare. Jeno’s eyes are like brown pools, and you notice every detail on his face; how dark and pronounced his eyebrows are compared to his suntanned skin, how pretty his nose looks against his face, the fringe on his forehead that is so close to giving a lovetap to his eyes, how shapely his chin is, a small, stray mustache hair kissing his upper lip…

His lips. Pursed slightly as he drinks in the sight of the little details of your face as well. They look a little chapped –

“There you are Y/N! Is that you Jeno?” A familiar voice rings across the large room, and you notice it to be Doyoung. His gaze is focused on you both. You and Jeno immediately stop gazing at each other, as if Doyoung flipped a switch, and you both focus your attention on the raven-haired employee, his hair wet from a fresh shower. He usually comes to work at eleven or noon since he is not a morning person.

“Yeah, it’s me,” Jeno says, waving before repositioning his other hand to hold the white cat in his arms.

“Long time no see,” Doyoung remarks. “How’s college?” He asks.

“Graduated in the spring,” Jeno says. “I’m back with my parents now.” He says.

“Oh,” Doyoung says, nodding awkwardly. “Well, if you want a job, the door is always open here. Trust me, we need the help,” Doyoung says.

“Thanks,” Jeno says, smiling courteously at Doyoung. “I’m actually here to look for another cat. Maybe two,” Jeno looks at you, an eyebrow raised in anticipation. Suddenly, he sneezes.

“Jeno,” you chastise. “What about your cat allergy?” You suddenly remember. Jeno learned affirmatively after adopting Bongshik that he had a cat allergy, and his sister and parents tried to convince him to give Bongshik back to the shelter, but Jeno vehemently refused. After almost a month of bonding with the feline, he didn’t have the heart to give Bongshik back. Instead, he went to the drug store and got some anti-histamines to suppress his allergies and eventually got more personalized medicine from his doctor. At first, his doctor said the best (and cheapest) course of action would be to return Bongshik, but Jeno just took the prescription and has since then been refilling his prescription on a regular basis.

“What cat allergy?” Jeno asks, but he sneezes a few times. Cocking your head at the raven-haired boy, you snort.

“That cat allergy?” You say, leaning all your weight on one leg.

“It’s nothing,” Jeno says dismissively. “I’ll ask my doctor. I’ll probably just have to up my dose.”

It was Doyoung’s turn to snort. “Can you really be around three cats every day?” He asks. “The only reason your allergy didn’t get out of control while you were volunteering here was because I kept you with the reptiles.” You nod in agreement. The reptiles were kept in another room on the far side of this shelter, far away from all the cat hair floating around in this room. Jeno, though, still used to sneak a few minutes with the cats.

“I can be around three cats!” Jeno says defensively. By this time, the white cat is rubbing itself against Jeno’s T-shirt.

Feeling this, Jeno’s gaze softens, and he smiles at the kitten, whose brown eyes Jeno looks in to. “I am going to name you Seoli,” Jeno says in a soft tone and gazes at the cat in your arms. “And I’m going to name you Nali.”

“Did your parents agree to two new cats?”

“Well,” Jeno trails off, shrugging his shoulders.

“Lee Jeno!” You say.

“My parents grew to like Bongshik. They’ll grow to like Seoli and Nali.” Jeno reasons.

You roll your eyes. Lee Jeno is the only person in the whole world you know who has a cat allergy and still wants three cats. “Lee Jeno, you’re crazy, you know that?”

Seoli and Nali instantly got along with Bongshik. The three of them would sleep together, eat together, and roam the house together, only being apart momentarily. Like Jeno predicted, his parents grew to like the addition of Seoli and Nali to the family.

Hearing about the new cats from you, Renjun would visit Jeno, and you would come along with them and play with all three cats. Renjun started joking that you two started being best friends without him and that you were leaving him in the dust.

Renjun started a new job as a paralegal and became busier than ever; he was working to save enough money to live in an apartment closer to the law firm he worked at, which is forty-five minutes away from your house. The commute itself was tiring and he was working extra hard to get along with his coworkers, going to events, and establishing contacts.

Like many weekends, this weekend Renjun was hanging out with a few coworkers at a party at one of their houses, and normally, you didn’t mind this, only joking to him that he only came home to eat and sleep.

In mid-July, without fail, you and Renjun would always go to the beach, ever since he was old enough to drive; it was valuable “sibling time” that your parents supported and even suggested; as teenagers, you didn’t always get along, and your parents wanted you both to establish a close relationship because sibling relationships were the only life-long relationships.

This weekend, Renjun was busy, and for the next few weekends, he would be catching up with old friends and would even go on a few dates, for his dating life was pretty sparse with how busy college was. You were hoping that Renjun could blow someone off and come with you and not break the tradition, but your hopes did nothing to change reality after Renjun told you about his plans and apologized that he wouldn’t be able to come to the beach with you.

So you decided, if you can’t bring your brother to the beach, bring your brother’s best friend.

At 7 AM on a Saturday, you knock on Jeno’s door, a few doors from your house, dressed in a casual T-Shirt and jeans shorts. You’re ready to go, without a doubt in your mind that Jeno won’t come.

Jeno answers the door, rubbing his eyes. From the looks of the dark house, Jeno’s parents aren’t awake. As a means to hold himself up, Jeno leans against the door. He’s dressed in long pajama bottoms and a black T-shirt (that is littered with Seoli’s white cat hair). The white, spotted cat follows Jeno to the door, sitting a few feet away from the living room couch.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” He asks, his voice heavy with drowsiness.

“We’re going to the beach, obviously,” you say matter-of-fact, in a voice that Jeno didn’t look like he wanted to argue with. He knew that you were hurting because Renjun couldn’t come with you to the beach any time soon, so he was ready to be called to go to the beach.

“Right now?”

“Yes right now. Don’t you remember that Renjun and I would leave early in the morning to get a head start to the beach?” The closest beach to your house is two hours away, and being landlocked during the college semester makes you restless for the yearly summer beach trip as well.

“Yeah I know but–”

“No ‘buts,’” you interrupt. “If we leave now, then we get the whole day at the beach. Be ready in thirty minutes.”

Jeno acknowledges with a sleepy grunt before closing the door, and you head back to your house to eat breakfast. If you left hungry, then you would be tempted to stop along the way for snacks, making the drive longer. So you ate a hearty bowl of oatmeal, a banana, and drank a glass of water before seeing Jeno standing at your door twenty-five minutes later with one of his sister’s peach-colored tote bags hanging on his shoulder, in casual shorts and a T-shirt, and a navy colored cap covering his black hair. You already had your things ready in a bag next to the dining room table, and you carry your bag and exit out the front door, saying a quick goodbye to your parents.

Out on the porch, you jog across the driveway to Jeno, and your parents wave to him. “Have fun guys,” they chorus, smiling. You roll your eyes.

“It’s like they’re leaving us on a playdate,” you say, and Jeno smiles, the tiredness in his eyes long gone.

“Want to ride in my car? After all, it’s clean now,” Jeno says. You sigh, but it’s not exasperated or tired.

“I should know,” you say.

Jeno’s Nissan sits in its usual place on the driveway, and Jeno takes his keys from his pocket, unlocking the car. As you both load your bags onto the back seat, you breathe in the air. “Minty fresh,” you smile, looking at the tree-shaped car freshener hanging on the rearview mirror. “You better keep this car clean because I am not cleaning it again,” you threaten, pointing your finger accusingly.

“I pinky promise,” Jeno says, he extends his hand, his pinky out, and you grasp it with your pinky, pinkies locking as well as your gazes.

Jeno’s hands are way softer than you expected.

The pinky promise lasts way longer than you expected, with you quickly pulling away and getting into the front passenger seat of the car. Jeno hops in the driver’s seat, and the car starts.

Jeno’s driving is smooth, and through the window, you admire the scenery. You pull out of your neighborhood, driving on local roads for a good few minutes, and you admire the beautiful scenery of houses, shrubs, and picket fences before getting on the highway. Now, cars are zooming past you both, of all sorts of shapes and colors, minivans to sport cars, black, white, gray, and silver.

“Turn on some music,” Jeno prompts. It’s easy to get distracted on the road, not by external forces such as a random bird flying by, but from the lull of the car when driving on the highway – when driving on the highway, the roads look the same, a cause for boredom and tiredness. The steady humming of Jeno’s car is particularly relaxing on this early morning.

“I thought you would never ask,” you say, in a voice that sounds mischievous. You twist your body to reach the back of the car, and you reach into your bag, fishing for something. When you pull it out, Jeno rolls his eyes.

“Seriously?” Jeno groans.

“What? You said you wanted music,” you say defensively.

“I didn’t mean the Backstreet Boys.”

You don’t listen to him and instead press the ‘CD media’ button on the front dashboard and insert your CD. The music is catchy, and you hum along to the songs that you’ve loved, namely ‘I’ll never break your heart’ and ‘Everybody.’

“I’ll never understand girls. I mean, what’s the appeal of boybands anyway?” Jeno says after some time.

“It’s the group dynamic, the interactions, the teamwork, and the songs are catchy as –” you stop yourself, cocking your head at Jeno. “Are you nodding along?”

“N-No,” Jeno stutters, purposely keeping his gaze fixed on the road so he doesn’t have to face you.

“Admit it,” you say, a smug look on your face. “You like it.”

“No, I don’t” Jeno argues.

“Yes, you do,” you argue back.

“No I don’t,” Jeno repeats.

You snort at this. “Look at us, we sound like two five-year-olds.”

“I think,” Jeno says with a joking lilt, “that we sound like an old married couple.”

“That too.” You look at the boy, an eyebrow arched.

After a few moments of silence, Jeno changes the topic. “I’m hungry,” he says. “Let’s get some instant ramen.”

“Where’s the microwave, genius?”

Jeno pouts. “Fast food?”

“We’re gonna be there in like fifteen minutes. I have some snacks in my bag.” Once again, you reach for the back of the car, fishing inside the tote bag for a bag of Cheetos.

“Here,” you say, holding the bag towards him.

“I’m driving, genius,” he says, emphasizing the last part in a mocking tone. You roll your eyes.

“I guess you’re gonna have to feed me,” Jeno says.

“Seriously?” You groan.

“Yes. If I could open the bag with my eyes and feed the Cheetos with some mad telekinesis, then I would.”

“Well, you would have to keep your eyes on the road, so you still couldn’t do that either.” Jeno grunts at your response, and you silently feel a small victory winning this conversation.

You open the bag and take a Cheeto in your left hand. Jeno opens his mouth, and you place the piece in his mouth. He crunches on it, and when you see his Adam’s apple move as he swallows the snack, you reach in and grab another piece. On and on this pattern goes until there are no Cheetos left in the bag, and at the final time you drop a piece of the snack in his mouth, he playfully clamps down on your fingers.

“Jeno!” You exclaim.

Jeno has a youthful, playful look on his face. “That’s what you get for forcing me to listen to this crap.”

“You like it too!”

Jeno rolls his eyes. “Here we go again.”

The rest of the car ride is filled with laughs, as though you were supposed to bring Jeno along to the beach this year instead of Renjun. The beach is filled with people wanting to soak up some sun, children playing games, and surfers swimming in the water. Luckily, there’s enough beach for everyone; the sands on this beach are well-maintained, and they go on for miles.

Suddenly, you grab the boy’s wrist, and Jeno looks surprised, a cute doe-like expression on his face (Jeno has the most beautiful, expressive eyes).

“Come on,” you say, a wide smile on your face. “I’ll show you a nice spot.”

Together, the two of you are lugging your tote bags across the beach, careful not to step on anyone being buried in sand or children playing games or other people sunbathing. It’s like the sand wants to absorb your feet, which is why your steps are labored, along with the load you are carrying.

The spot you take Jeno is more secluded, with sparse surfers coming about here and there. It’s next to a jagged, gray peak, perfect for divers. The small pieces of eroding rocks falling to the water make it less kid-friendly, but it’s still a good spot if you want to relax and get away from the noise. Right here is where you decide to set up, a few yards from the shore where the cold seawater can’t touch you.

Carefully, you unpack your tote bag, set up your beach towel, and place a book on the sand. The beach was always a way for you and Renjun to relax together, talk about updates in your lives, and strengthen your relationship. But sometimes you both liked to sit in silence, enjoying each other’s company while enjoying the words of an author, the introverts you both are.

Before sitting down, you also take off your T-shirt and shorts, revealing a navy, strappy bikini underneath. Picking up your book, you open it to the first page and sit down. Next to you, Jeno takes off his shirt, revealing toned abs. (What did you expect? He plays soccer). You don’t want to admit that your attention on your book is long gone.

When Jeno catches you staring, an immediate flare of heat hits your face, and you quickly try to bring your attention back to your book, starting at the first sentence. You’re unable to keep focus anymore, just re-reading the same sentence at least five times because your brain is too distracted to understand the sentence.

“You don’t have to look away,” Jeno teases. “Every girl wants a look at Jenabs.”

“That’s what you’re calling it? Jenabs?”

“Yes. Is there a problem?” Jeno asks.

“Obviously. It sounds so self-centered,” you huff.

“You’re just lashing out because I caught you red-handed.”

“Maybe you’ll get a red hand to your pretty face,” you challenge, a humorous look in your eyes.

“Ah,” Jeno says thoughtfully. “You think I’m pretty?”

Another hot flare hits your cheeks, with the heat of a thousand suns. “No,” you say.

“Yes,” Jeno counters.

“No,” you repeat, this time more confident. By this time, you both are gazing at each other intently in silence, until suddenly, you start laughing. Jeno does too. It was one of those times when the moment seemed so serious, but the argument was just so silly.

“Just admit that you think I’m attractive,” Jeno says simply.

“Every girl with a pulse thinks you’re hotter than a sidewalk in August.” You deadpan.

“I don’t care what they think,” Jeno says suddenly. You quirk an eyebrow at this statement. Quickly, Jeno recovers himself. “I care about what you think.” He smiles. “You’re the only person I’ve known that hasn’t ever brought up my looks.”

“Why should I?” You shrug your shoulders. “You know you’re hot.” At this you and Jeno laugh again together, but after a few moments, Jeno stops laughing.

“So you admit it?” Jeno asks curiously.

“Yes, I do.” You say sighing, hating that you’re giving him this victory. “Lee Jeno, you’re one of the most attractive men I’ve seen in my whole life,” you vow. “Now, can I get back to my book?” You ask.

“Fine.” Jeno obliges. He sits down on his towel laid out beside yours, lying down on his back as you read your book. His gaze changes from the ocean’s waves licking the sandy shores to the side of your face. You’re maybe a chapter in when Jeno interrupts your train of thought.

“Are you really gonna be reading the whole time?” Jeno whines. “I didn’t bring anything to do because I thought we were gonna go in the water.”

“Th-The water?” You ask. You look at Jeno as if he grew a second head.

“Yes, water. We’re at the beach per your request. Remember?” Jeno says slowly.

“Yeah, but I didn’t think–”

“You didn’t think about swimming at the beach?” Jeno asks incredulously.

“No,” you respond, your voice small.

“You’re literally wearing a swimsuit,” Jeno points out.

“Yeah, but that’s just to get a good tan,” you say. Now that you say it out loud, it does sound kind of ridiculous that you didn’t even make plans about getting in the water today. “And plus,” you say a bit awkwardly. “I don’t really know how to swim.”

It seems as though Jeno’s eyes are about to bulge out of his face. “You’ve been coming to this beach for years, and you don’t know how to swim?”

“I never really learned how. I mean, I did, but I wasn’t very good, and I’m super out of practice. I usually just come here to read or admire the scenery – Jeno!” You exclaim. Jeno snatches the book out of your hand and places it on the towel. He’s strong enough to hoist you up, and you’re left with no choice but to jog along with him to the edge of the shore, kicking up mounds of sand; you have a stinking suspicion about what he’s going to do.

“Today’s the day I’m gonna teach you how to swim.” He says.

“B-But,” you stutter, struggling for words. Jeno doesn’t look like he’ll take no for an answer.

“I promise I won’t let go of you, and we won’t go far from the shore.” He says, his gaze sincere. “Let’s start off with floating. Spread your arms out and kick your feet up. Act as though you want to lie down on the water like it’s sand. Like this.” Jeno demonstrates, going slightly away from the shore and deeper in the water, leaving you knee-deep, standing on the wet sand underfoot. Once Jeno has floated for a few seconds, he positions himself upright, everything except his neck and face submerged in water as he swims towards you, walking the last few steps to you.

“Now you try.” You look a little nervous but follow what Jeno says. You kick your feet up and try to treat the water like it’s the sand you rest your towel against; Jeno’s hand is on the small of your back as he holds you up. You’re not used to the feeling of water in your ears, and you’re struggling to stay afloat as you accidentally breathe in water. Hearing you cough, Jeno sets you upright, and you cough up the salty water.

“I don’t like,” you say between coughs. “The water in my ears. It keeps going in.”

“Trust me when I say that when you don’t want water to go in your ears and nose, it doesn’t. When you are thinking about water going into your ears and nose, it does. Now, let’s try again.”

“No,” you whine. “I don’t like swimming.”

“Please?” Jeno asks. “For me? After all, you did drag me out here so early.”

“Fine.” You relent.

“Like I said,” Jeno chides, “Kick up your feet and lie on the water like it’s sand. Don’t struggle too much right now. Unless you don’t think about the water around your ears and nose, it won’t go in.”

You repeat what you did earlier, kicking up your feet and lying on the water like it’s sand. This time you don’t move a muscle. You let the gentle low-tide waves of the water kiss your skin and wash over you again before it’s exposed to the refreshingly cool ocean breeze again. Jeno’s hand is against the small of your back as he leads you to deeper waters.

“What are you doing?” You ask.

“Floating is all the same. If you can float in knee-deep water, you can float in deeper water.” Jeno looks into your eyes. “Don’t worry, I still won’t let go.”

You don’t struggle against the water, and when you’re in the deeper water, Jeno helps bring you upright on the water. This time, your feet are unable to touch the ocean floor, and before the panic can settle in your eyes, Jeno is holding your waist.

“Upright floating works the same way. Don’t struggle. Hold your head up high.” You follow as Jeno says and observes how he does it. Jeno slowly takes his hands away from your waist and holds your arm instead. Slowly, he lets go, and here you are in front of him, swimming; you’re pretty amazed too.

“Oh my God, I’m doing it!” You say excitedly. Jeno shares your excitement.

“I know. To think you wanted to give up,” Jeno shakes his head.

Your bodies are close, so close that you can feel Jeno’s breath on your nose. Jeno looks almost angelic with the way the salty water glistens against his face as if his skin is made of diamonds. His jet-black hair is stuck to his forehead, and your hair is in thick, salty strands, but the moment still feels perfect; the shouting of children in the distance doesn’t bother either of you.

You almost want to ki–

Suddenly, you’re taken out of your thoughts when a splash of cold water hits your face. Jeno has already swum a few feet away, the culprit of the cold splash on your face.

“Tag! You’re it!” He says in between giggles.

“Jeno!” You exclaim, trying your best to swim and splash him.

He’s the most handsome, adorable dork you’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing.

Every summer, city council organized a summer concert series held at the local park. They mostly featured student bands, cover bands, and lots of vendors. But most importantly: they were free.

The one happening tonight was the last one of this year’s series, and there would be fireworks. You hadn’t been able to attend the last few summer concerts because of your growing responsibilities at the pet shelter; you were becoming pet manager, a position where you would inventory what animals were available to adopt, and the numbers were changing every day. Also, Doyoung had gone on vacation along with many of the volunteers, so you, Taeyong, and Sungchan were left to cover for them.

Tonight though, you were given the day off, so you decided to see if Jeno was free to go to the concert with you.

You tell your mother your intentions, and when you’re done talking, she gives you a sly look.

“You’ve been hanging out with Jeno a lot recently. Is there something I should know about?” She asked. She doesn’t ask this in a condescending, strict-parent tone, but of one as a friend. For the most part, your mother was always the woman you came clean to and got advice from; there were truely only minal secrets you kept from her.

“Yeah Y/N, is there something we should know about?” Renjun asks.

Renjun. For a while, you had completely forgotten about him. He had started getting suspicious recently that you were harboring feelings for his long-time best friend. After the beach trip, he started getting suspicious, but he had been too busy to do anything about it, only sulking in the corner thinking about it.

You had to admit that you had a little crush on Jeno, in that every time you thought about him, your heart started racing in an exhilarating way. Maybe when Renjun was around, you weren’t as slick as you thought you were. “No,” you say, a little quieter than you meant for it to be. You clear your throat, making your voice louder. “Nothing’s going on. Jeno’s always available to hang out, which is why I’m hanging out with him.”

Your mother doesn’t say anything, knowing Renjun is in the room. Most likely, Renjun was worried that if you and Jeno got into a relationship, it would mess up the long-time friendship they had, and if you broke up, it would be even worse. You understood his sentiment, but it’s not like Jeno likes you back…

Right?

The way he looked at you, the way that when you talked, he was fully attentive, his soft, expressive eyes reacting, listening to every word you say.

That’s just because you guys have become good friends, right?

(A part of you wishes that it isn’t).

You’re wearing your standard summer uniform of daisy dukes and a T-shirt when you walk up to Jeno’s house and the door opens before you knock. Jeno is standing at the entrance of his house, already dressed in shorts and a sleeveless shirt, showing off his strong arms.

“Jeno,” you say. “Do you want to go to the summer concert together?” You ask.

“Actually,” Jeno says shyly. “I was gonna ask you the same thing.”

“Great.” Jeno invites you in and asks if you want anything. You said you would just have some water. He pours you a glass before heading to his room to grab a towel and some bug spray. Stepping outside, you both spray yourselves, and when he goes back inside to put the bug spray away, he tells his parents that he’s going to be out and will be back before ten.

The park is a short drive from your neighborhood, and it is just as scenic as you remembered it to be. It’s about sixty-something acres filled with walking trails that loop around your city, which city council has tried hard to have more “green” city planning, rather than letting this place become a concrete jungle.

In this park, there is lots of green space for people to lay their towels across the grass and enjoy the music. Most of the people here are young parents with budding families, in which a family-friendly free concert with a packed picnic and fireworks is the perfect summer activity. There are also older people like you and Jeno, showing up to the concert today because they were bored. The beginning of August signaled to high schoolers the start of school, and to college people that they would be moving back to their dorms soon. Either way, the park is packed. Tonight isn’t as hot and stuffy as most nights, which also accounts for why there are so many people here tonight.

“What’s the theme for this concert?” You ask Jeno when you hop out of his car.

“‘70’s American rock,” he says.

“Fun,” you say. You weren’t an avid rocker, but you turn on the oldies radio station, you didn’t mind listening to a few rock songs. “It’s better than working at the pet shelter every single night.” Jeno laughs. You loved your job more than anything, but you wanted a semblance of work-life balance.

“Now I’m glad I didn’t take up Doyoung’s offer immediately,” Jeno says.

“It isn’t usually this bad,” you say. “It’s just that Taeyong and many volunteers are on vacation, and I’m being given more responsibilities.”

“Maybe I could come in and volunteer just to help you out,” Jeno says wistfully. “I’ll have to find time in my schedule,” he jokes.

You raise a brow at the boy. “In your schedule of doing nothing?” You snort.

“It’s not nothing,” Jeno counters. “I’m just relaxing before finding a job. Jobs are going to be there after I take a little break from college,” he says. Renjun wouldn’t ever be caught saying something like this. For him, it’s always one thing onto the next. Renjun is a restless man, and taking a break without a job would drive him crazy.

While Renjun is ridiculously Type A, Jeno is the opposite. He’s used to opportunities coming to him, believing that everything has a way of working out in the end. It’s crazy how the two have managed to be friends with such vastly different outlooks on life.

You drop the topic, opting to lay out the towel that Jeno brought. There’s enough space for both of you to fit… but tightly. Even though you’re wearing bug spray, the sharp, freshly cut grass makes your skin feel itchy.

“I guess we’re gonna have to sit like this,” you say a little awkwardly. Jeno turns to face you, his face only inches from yours; your arms brush Jeno’s biceps, and you feel your throat become dry.

“Yeah,” he says softly. No witty reply.

The silence between you is broken by the cheers of the audience. The performers are here.

“What’s up Neo City?” The head performer asks the audience. He’s a man in his mid to late twenties, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans. Cheers are the response, filling the air.

“We’re Neo Culture Tech, and today we’re going to be performing some covers to end Neo City’s 1997 Summer Concert Series! We hope you enjoy the performance!” The man stops talking, and the park erupts with cheers.

The first note is played on the piano, followed by the addition of drums and electric guitar. The songs go on one by one, and Neo Culture Tech plays popular songs by the Eagles, ACDC, Fleetwood Mac, and Def Leopard. Parents are dancing with smaller children, singing along to the songs they listened to in grade school, while younger people sit on their towel and jam out to the songs less physically.

You and Jeno are bobbing your heads together to the music, stealing glances at one another. Jeno was able to sing along a little to ‘Shoot to Thrill’ and ‘Gold Dust Woman,’ while you were able to sing along to ‘Witchy Woman’ and ‘Hotel California’ after memorizing the lyrics so long ago. As the guy who was playing the guitar played the guitar solos for ‘Hotel California,’ people cheered.

“Before we start the fireworks show, I’d like to end off with a banger. Everyone stand up and find a partner to dance with!” the lead singer said. With that, the band started the chords for ‘Pour Some Sugar On Me’ by Def Leopard.

Jeno looks at you, a wry smile on his face. “Would you care to dance with me, partner?” He asks, holding out his elbow. You loop your arm in his.

“Of course.”

By this time, more of the younger people were standing up, dancing with their friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, or wives. You and Jeno were dancing, not caring how you looked, your hands clasping and unclasping as Jeno twirled you around to the rock song. You both sing along to the song, knowing the famous song.

When the song ends, you’re out of breath, your chest against Jeno’s, but Jeno doesn’t look very tired; there’s only a small drop of sweat pooling at his forehead, and he’s able to control his breathing. While the crowd screams, cheering for the band that just performed, you and Jeno are in your own world.

You feel like you know what Jeno’s thinking.

Slowly, you start leaning in, and Jeno follows your example. Before long, your lips land on his. You only want it to be a peck, but your body refuses to listen to your brain, so here you were, for what feels like centuries kissing Jeno. You weren’t going to struggle against your feelings anymore, you were going to float like you were at the beach.

Kissing your brother’s best friend.

Kissing the guy that all the girls in high school drooled over, the guy that got so many sports scholarship offers, the guy that many thought was infallible.

But he’s just Jeno, the adorable dork who’s stuck with your brother for almost their whole lives through thick and thin.

The adorable dork that you’ve helplessly fallen in love with.

Reluctantly, you both pull away, your breaths hitting each others’ noses. You’re almost to scared to look Jeno in the eye.

You just changed everything.

While you’re too busy not looking at Jeno, he takes your chin with his thumb and forefinger and tilts your gaze upward, to look at him.

When you look into his beautiful brown eyes, you realize that you didn’t change everything with one kiss. The feelings were always there. While you were slowly falling for Jeno, Jeno started slowly falling for you.

“I-I think I’m in love with you,” Jeno says, his voice unsure, lacking that cocky athlete tone that’s synonymous with Lee Jeno. While one hand remained holding your chin up to face him, the other hand was on your waist.

You didn’t think you ever wanted him to stop touching you.

“No,” he corrects himself, clearing his thoat. Seconds felt like hours, and your heart is racing like crazy.

“I know I’m in love with you.”

You think the loud beating sound is just your heart, but when you look up, the black sky is filled with color, expressive fireworks shining before dissipating. Red, orange, blue, and purple fill the sky before gray smoke settles and floats away. The park is oddly quiet while at least two hundred people enjoy the fireworks and are held by their boyfriends or girlfriends. You look up with Jeno in the same position you were, his arm still on your faces close. Your jaw is close to touching his collar bone, your nose almost touching his neck.

“I love you too.”

It’s probably one in the morning right now.

Ever since you and Jeno confessed your feelings, all you were doing was hiding your feelings around your family. You didn’t want Renjun finding out about your relationship just yet, and Jeno had the same idea. You and Jeno wouldn’t advertise to your families that you were hanging out, and most of the time, you met up at the pet shelter, where Doyoung was the only one who knew about the true nature of your relationship (after the unfortunate man walked in on you two making out in the janitor’s closet). You and Jeno forced him to promise that he wouldn’t tell anyone or even give any hints if he ran into your families; in small towns like yours, word travels fast.

Other than seeing Jeno at the animal shelter, you would sneak Jeno into your bedroom at night. A little part of you thrived from the danger you felt, doing something secret and slightly forebidden (nothing this exhilarating ever happened to you in high school or in college). You live in a one-story bungalow (like all the houses in your neighborhood), and your parents’ room is on the other side of your room, with the kitchen separating your rooms.

However, only a wall was separating you from Renjun’s room. You think you’re safe right now since through the paper-thin walls, you can hear Renjun soundly snoring to himself. The iceing on the cake was that Renjun is a light sleeper.

You hear a knock on your window, and you look to see that it’s Jeno. You’re in your pajamas, just a shirt with some pajama shorts, and you get off your bed, systematically opening the latch to your window. Pushing the window, it opens now, and Jeno opens it a little wider, enough for you to let him in.

He’s dressed in a T-shirt, sweatpants, and red, drugstore flipflops. He rubs his arm a little bit, a small scowl on his face.

“You should really trim that rose bush,” Jeno says softly, his gaze following to the rosebush that is near your window. Outside your window, you had a good view of the garden, and your mother took great pain to maintain that garden; your father often joked that it was her third child. For Jeno to get access to your window, he would have to wade through all the plants and flowers, careful not to step on anything because your mom would notice the next day. “I think it roughed me up pretty good.”

“Let me see,” you whisper, pulling his arm. In the minimal light that came from the almost full moon outside, you’re able to see clearly. It’s just a little scratch, that was slowly turning into a red line. No blood.

“You’ll live,” you say rolling you eyes. Sometimes Lee Jeno was the most dramatic guy that you’ve ever met.

Jeno pouts. “I think I would feel better if you kissed it,” he suggests.

You heave a sigh. “I swear to God,” you mutter. You lean foreward, pressing your lips against his arm. “That better?” You ask, crossing your arms and leaning your weight to one leg.

“How about one here?” He asks, pointing to his lips.

You laugh a little to yourself. “Greedy little–”

Jeno interrupts you. “Don’t act like you don’t want to.”

Standing on your toes, you lean in, your nose touching Jeno’s for a brief moment before your lips collide. Jeno’s hands gravitate towards your waist as he tries to push you against the nearest wall. He pushes you to the wall with the window he climbed into your room with. There’s only a narrow gap of space between the edge of the window and the bookshelf that houses all of your albums. He pushes you there, his knee finding its place between you legs. He grunts a little as his lips trail from your mouth to your chin to your neck. He slides you against the wall, your elbow hitting the edge of your bookshelf, and something goes flying off of the top of your bookshelf.

Immediately, you and Jeno jump apart at the noise when the object hits the floor. You’re thankful that the carpet muffles the sound, but it’s still audible since it hit the edge of the wooden door. You bend down to examine the fallen object, realizing that it’s just a snowglobe. You pick it up, putting it on your desk instead. No one stirs. Renjun is still in his room snoring.

“We’re supposed to be quiet!” You whisper loudly, putting your index finger to your lips.

“I’m sorry!” Jeno apologises.

“God, you lumber around my room like you haven’t been here before,” you joke. “How about let’s go into the bed where there’s less chance of making a noise.”

Jeno quickly agrees, and you both go into your bed, under the covers. Jeno’s arms find their place around you once more, and you put your head on Jeno’s chest, feeling his heartbeat. Jeno kisses the top of your head. After a few moments of lying like this in silence, your lips find Jeno’s again. You’re on top of him, him straddling your hips, but quickly, it turns into him on top of you. You both kiss each other with a new kind of fervor, but Jeno pulls away. “How long are we going to be doing this?” He asks. “I don’t know about you, but this whole sneaking around thing is getting kind of old. I just want to call you my girlfriend in front of people.”

You kiss him. “Just until I get the chance to tell Renjun.” You say. “I have a speech prepared.” You clear you throat, shifting your position in bed so you can face your boyfriend. In the dim light in which you can barely see Jeno, you can imagine his beautiful features, barely believing that you are his girlfriend. “I love Jeno, Jeno loves me, we want to be together, and you can’t do anything about it.” Jeno waits for more.

“That’s it?” He asks.

You shrug your shoulders. “What else am I supposed to say?”

Jeno smiles. He finds directness to be one of your most endearing qualities. You aren’t scared to say what’s on your mind, even if it’s controversial. He puts a hand on your cheek and brings you closer to him, kissing you again. His lips smack against your’s and you’re pretty sure you can hear audible popping sounds every time you both mutually pull away for air, only meaning to come back.

When he pulls away, Jeno says. “Y/N, you should at least be a bit more considerate to his feelings. This is going to be a big change for him.” Jeno reasons.

You seemed to like the exact opposite of what Jeno sees in you. You liked the way he considered everyone, and although it sometimes makes it seems like he is a people-pleaser, people who are the most considerate to others’ feelings when it doesn’t align with their own are the people who are the peacemakers, the role models, the people who rule the world.

While you were the fire, Jeno was the water, who made you see reason. And your directness teaches Jeno to stand up for himself.

“I know, but if Renjun can’t accept it, then he needs to grow up.”

“I don’t think Renjun wants to grow up.”

After you hear the new voice, the lights turn on, and you and Jeno immediately jump apart to opposite sides of your twin bed (but it’s not possible without your bodies still touching). This only gives the onlooker a better view of the two parties involved. When you and Jeno finally decide to face the onlooker, you realize that it’s Renjun in his pajamas. He wasn’t wearing his contacts, but he doesn’t need them to recognize the two most important people in his life. His arms are crossed as he examines both you and Jeno, and together, you both struggle for an explanation.

“Surprise?” You and Jeno chorus together.

PRESENT DAY

Eventually, Renjun got over it. Or else, he wouldn’t have been able to give such a wonderful best man speech.

That’s right. After years of dating which helped you realize that no one was more perfect for you than Jeno, you and Jeno decided to get married in 2003 after you both were settled in your careers. Jeno, after a few months of relaxation, got a job at a marketing firm, and he worked his way up to become a lead account manager. You, after earning your degree in accounting, worked at a firm for a few years before quitting and becoming the book keeper at Taeyong’s pet shelter, which now you owned. Taeyong moved to his mother’s paid-off house in Seoul to take care of his aging mother, so he stepped down and gave you ownership of his beloved pet shelter. He now worked at his mother’s supermarket and visited you often.

Sometimes, it amazed you how far society has gone since your childhood. You would never have dreamed of touch-screen cell phones with the power of a full-sized computer or your fridge making grocery lists for you. It was convenient and fascinating, but at other times, this new world scared you; only recently has it been confirmed that your phone is listening to you and people are selling your online data.

“Kids, dinner!” You shouted up the stairs. Just after you were married, you became pregnant with your daughter, and five years later, your son came along.

“Coming,” your daughter Yoona said.

“Yeah!” Your son Hyuckjae yelled from his room. That wasn’t really an answer, leaving you signing by the kitchen.

Jeno is already sitting at the table, eating the meal that you prepared. It wasn’t that complicated, just some fried rice with some vegetables and meat, as well as potato soup since you were tired after your long day at work. You sat at the table next to your husband, and you know you don’t have to call for your children again when you hear thundering down the stairs. Yoona’s phone is glued to her hands, while Hyunjae finds his position next to Jeno. The food is on the table, but only three of you are eating; Yoona’s food remains untouched as she sits down and keeps her attention only on her phone, not acknowledging the presence of her family.

“Yoona!” You say, snapping in front of her face. Only when you put your hand between her phone did she actually look at you.

“What do you want mom?” She says, exasperated.

“Aren’t you going to eat your food?”

“Yeah,” she replies, “In a little bit,” Almost immediately, she only looks back at your phone.

“Yoona, put the phone away.”

“That’s right honey,” a new voice interjects, and it’s Jeno. “Put your phone away. We want to have a conversation.” Jeno adds.

“About what?” Yoona asks. She finally puts her phone down and looks at you both. “Are you guys having a midlife crisis?”

“Midlife –” Jeno stops.

“We’re not even that old yet!” You exclaim.

“Yeah Yoona,” Hyuckjae adds.

“Shut up Hyuckjae,” Yoona says, her voice snarky. “Buttering up to Mom and Dad isn’t going to get you a phone.”

“Says who?” Hyuckjae argues back. “Mom and Dad didn’t say anything.”

“Hyuckjae, you’re not getting a phone,” you say stubbornly.

“Oh come on, Mom!” Hyunjae whines. “I’m the only eighth grader without a phone!” Hyuckjae counters.

“Me and your father didn’t have a phone at your age. You’ll live.”

“That’s because you guys lived in the stone ages.”

Jeno scoffs. “The ‘90’s weren’t even that long ago.”

Yoona cocks her head. “The ‘90’s are in history books now.”

You and Jeno both look at each other, but Yoona continues. “The ‘90’s were like thirty years ago.”

You knew that time had passed, but it never really occurred to you the quantifiable number of years; someone born in 1990 is in their thirties now. You vividly remember 1990, being a thirteen year old. Jeno was fifteen. You wonder how he’s feeling.

“That doesn’t change why you should have a phone, Hyuckjae,” you say.

“What about schoolwork? I’ll be in high school in the fall.”

“You can use the family computer.” Hyuckjae groans; the desktop in the computer room right off the entrance of your’s and Jeno’s suburban home (originally the formal dining room) is a Windows 8.1, and somewhat slow.

“Hyuckjae, we’ll get you a phone your first month of freshman year, just like your mom and I agreed on.” Jeno says cooly. “That’s when Yoona got her first phone.”

Hyunjae grunts. “But that’s so long from now.”

Noticing how the conversation mainly was between you, Jeno, and Hyunjae, Yoona gestures to pick up her phone when you point at her.

“Don’t even think about picking up that phone right now, young lady,” you say pointedly, and Yoona’s hands immediately back away.

“Right that conversation we’re going to have,” Jeno says, redirecting the topic. “How was everyone’s day?”

“That’s the conversation you want to have?” Yoona says.

“Yeah, what’s wrong with it?” You ask, defending Jeno.

“Nothing…” Yoona trails away.

“I’ll start,” you say. “I had an overall good day. Taeyong gave me an extra 15% off groceries instead of 10%.” It was incredibly convenient that Taeyong’s mother’s supermarket was only eight miles from the pet shelter.

“Nice,” Jeno says, smiling in that same boyish eyesmile that you fell in love with all those years ago. “I had an average day. It would have been good, but the coffee machine in the cafeteria broke,” Jeno sighs.

You and Jeno both turn to look at Yoona. “I had a good day, I guess. I got a 100 on my calculus test.”

“Great job!” Jeno says. You reach over to rub Yoona’s shoulders.

“You see? I told you it would benefit to go to calculus tutoring,” you say.

“Hyuckjae? How was your day?” Jeno asks.

“Not good. You guys aren’t getting me a phone.”

“We just said we would!” You exclaim. “When you’re a freshman.”

Hyuckjae grunts at this and stands up, heading towards the sink to clear the remnants on his plate. You didn’t realize that Yoona and Hyukcjae had been eating particularly fast tonight, evident by their nearly empty dishes.

“I’m going to the computer room,” he says, not waiting for a response when he leaves. Shortly after, Yoona is done with her food. After rinsing her plate, she leaves it in the sink and snatches her phone off of the dining room table (as if you were going to take it and look at the texts on the notification bar).

“I’m going to my room,” she says. She waits for you to say a resigned ‘okay,’ and she heads up the stairs, sparing no time to look at her phone.

“What could be so important that she can barely stay a free moment without her phone?” You voice to your husband. You and Jeno are taking your time eating your meal at the table, now by yourselves.

“What isn’t so important at that age?” Jeno says before slurping the soup collected in his spoon. “When you’re a teenager, you see things with a different perspective than you would see if you were a mom, for example.”

You sigh at these words, the fresh perspective that your husband is giving you that you failed to see initially. Jeno is good at seeing all sides of the situation; that’s why Renjun always goes to him for advice.

“I guess,” you say, crossing your arms. “I can’t imagine being a kid right now.”

“I bet Yoona and Hyuckjae can’t imagine being a kid in the ‘90’s.”

You sigh. “Things really have changed, haven’t they?” When you and Jeno were younger, you weren’t trying to get the best gadgets to impress your friends, you didn’t have advanced TV’s and vacuum cleaners that were listening to you, you weren’t always on Instagram and Twitter, and the concept of a ‘social media influencer’ didn’t exist at all.

When you and Jeno were younger, you thought the future would resemble Back to the Future. Although there weren’t any hoverboards that actually hovered the ground in 2016, the actual future paralleled the movie in surprising ways with the fact that people were always so distracted with the screens in their hands.

“Don’t you ever just feel…” you start off. Jeno’s attention is on you while he eats.

“Don’t you ever feel that people are always in their own worlds?” You ask. “Always on their phones looking at the latest posts, listening to music, downloading photos? No one ever runs around the neighborhood and draws chalk or play with the neighborhood kids,” you sigh. It was like people preferred to type than to talk.

“Yeah. It wasn’t like that when we were kids,” Jeno says. You eat a couple of spoons of friend rice, the silence between you both evident.

“In a way,” Jeno says, “Things are still the same.”

“How?” You ask.

“Well, people still have the need to be social, whether it’s on social media or in person. And we are still trying to keep up with our friends,” he says. Without words, you know he’s talking about your son and how obsessed he was about getting a phone since his friends started to flash their iPhones and Samsungs.

“I still think life was simpler back in the ‘90’s,” you say stubbornly. “Even though we had to use TV Guide to find out what was on TV, it was still easier. I’m always looking over my shoulder these days,” you confess. “Every single second, so much data is being collected and sold, it makes me worried. On top of all that, social media isn’t good for young kids,” you say, redirecting the conversation back to Hyuckjae. You feel a little guilty seeing Hyuckjae so upset that he doesn’t have a phone, but it was the principle that mattered. You didn’t think phones were good for young kids, to be hooked up to the internet 24/7. Being fifteen and having a phone isn’t much better than being fourteen and having a phone, but you drew the line at high school. You couldn’t protect your son forever, no matter how much you desperately wanted to.

“There’s still something that remains simple, though,” Jeno says. When he gently squeezes your thigh, you think you have an idea.

“This,” he says. He leans over and kisses your lips, cupping your cheek. His lips are soft as they rub rhythmically against your lips. He pulls away, his voice soft. “I love you. We can be in 2092, teleporting to see our great-grandchildren, and I’ll be in love with you,” Jeno says.

You giggle. Nineteen years of marriage, and he still makes you feel like a young bride.

“We can be in 3092 with our brains connected to robots, and I’ll still be in love with you,” you counter, turning this into a competition.

“How about let’s think about right now,” Jeno says. He cups your cheeks in his hands and admires your eyes before he kisses you deeply, as if he isn’t going to kiss you ever again.

The world can change as much as it wants, as long as you have Lee Jeno by your side.

a/n: if you've made it this far, thank you so much for reading :) since this is my first slowburn, let me know what you thought in the comments or by sending me an ask! thanks again!

#nct #jeno #lee jeno #nct fluff #nct scenarios #nct dream #jeno fluff #jeno scenarios #jeno imagines #nct imagines #nct reactions #nct dream fluff #nct dream scenarios #nct dream imagines #jeno smut

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hoosbandewan · 3 months

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THE Billy Taylor Post

I have a love/hate relationship with The Halcyon as a show overall. I don't feel like all of it is written well, but the area in which it definitely excels is Billy Taylor's story. You know, the cutie pie bellboy that Ewan plays and who is always bugging out in all of the gifs we make of him. He's young, he's sweet, and he's insanely adorable.

And his story is also the best in the entire show. In my opinion!!

I also cry whenever I think about Billy for too long but we'll get into that later, hehe.

Spoilers for The Halcyon, btw!

If you haven't seen it, The Halcyon is set at a fancy hotel in London just as WWII has come to Britain. Also, fair warning that this post is a little bit all over the place because I have SO MANY BILLY TAYLOR FEELS

At the start of the show, Billy is seventeen and working at The Halcyon as a bellboy. He's portrayed by Ewan as someone who's maybe a little bit... no thoughts, head empty. I jokingly refer to Billy as having big NPC energy when he's in the background of scenes because it looks like he has radio static going through his head whenever he's not being interacted with. And like to think that it's not because it was Ewan's first gig as an actor. I think Billy genuinely is a little bit daft. He's the baby himbo. He's the golden retriever puppy who isn't the smartest in the room but he makes up for it with hard work and dedication and pure sweetness.

I mean, he's only seventeen and he appears to be one of the higher ranking bellboys at the hotel. He's given important tasks like welcoming ~secret guests to the hotel, showing new hires where to go, and personally taking care of high ranking guests' belongings. He's clearly trusted by the management and is, more importantly, very good at his job.

But, bless his heart... Billy can be kind of a mess. He's forgetful and sometimes just plain thick. He loses the family dog of the lord and lady who own the hotel while taking it out for a walk. (Literally how does that happen. Billy.) He bungles the staff poker game by revealing his hand without realizing. He's also a silly little dumbass when he and a couple of the other hotel staff are at the movie theater and see the lady who owns the hotel (who's there on a !secret date) and he straight up points at her from several aisles back with his eyes all bugging out. Be more obvious, Billy!

Billy is young and naive and maybe not the smartest guy around, but you know what? He's good at what he does (most of the time, lol) and he's a damn hard worker.

He's also someone who knows that people are reluctant to believe in him and he clearly doesn't like that. Billy signs up to join the army the moment he turns eighteen and, although we don't see it, his mum Peggy (who works at the hotel as the telephonist aka switchboard operator) mentions to the hotel general manager that there was a bit of an argument between them over it.

“Do you know why he was so upset that I didn’t want him signing up? He thought I was saying he wasn’t good enough.”

He also gets angry with his mum when his call-up papers do arrive. I know I called him daft before, so I'm giving him credit where credit is due - he actually very cleverly notices that the letter should have gone to his family's house, but it showed up at the hotel instead. And, upon learning that he's been assigned to the Royal Artillery instead of what he wanted - the engineers - he knows it was his mum (with the help of the hotel general manager, but he doesn't know that part) who moved things around so that Billy could stay close to home.

He angrily tells her, "I ain't a child no more," and storms out of the room. Billy wants to prove himself. He wants to be a grown up with responsibilities and he wants to be believed in.

You feel for him, but you also feel for his mum, who is watching her only son grow up and enlist in the war effort. At one point, Peggy mentions that she was only 19 or 20 by the time she'd had Billy, so she was a young mother (and still is!). Her worrying and fretting over him clearly annoys him because he's a teenager, but, god you feel for her. We also learn that Billy's dad, Jim, was drafted to fight in the war so she must be out of her mind with worry. I'll get more into my Billy feels as related to his mum in a bit. But I mean... just look at this line of Peggy's after Billy's joined the army:

“I pray. I fuss. I hold him a little tighter each time I see him."

Before I move on, GOSH, Billy is such a teenager when it comes to his interactions with his mum, lol. He doesn't want her fussing over him or being affectionate. He shrugs her off when she tries to fix his collar. He's reluctant to let her kiss his cheek... but he lets her do it anyway, of course.

Speaking of his family, Billy's relationship with his little sister, Dora, is also so cute and I love them. She tells another character that she doesn't miss him once he's moved out to join the army because she thinks he's "annoying" but she really does love him, lbr. And he's clearly very close with her, too.

At one point, their family home is destroyed in the Blitz so Peggy and Dora move into The Halcyon for a while. Billy watches his sister on mornings that he can get away from his army duties. He carries her around piggyback style. He lets her wear his army hat. He calls her "squirt." They're freaking adorable.

There's also a cute little moment during one of the Blitz raids where Billy's mum and sister are in the hotel shelter and Dora is frightened. Her mum tells her to listen for the sounds of the artillery and says, “That’s our Billy. He’s protecting us.”

And he is. Billy is a protector. He's always looking out for the people he cares about. When Kate, the maid he has a crush on, is SA'd by the Count, Billy angrily confronts him and even points the Count's own fucking gun at him. AND HE PULLS THE TRIGGER. He was about to fucking murder this man for doing what he did to Kate!

Billy is a fucking real one. God, he's the best character.

I don't have anywhere specific to put this, but I wanted to mention how much I love the little detail the writers added in about Billy's handiness and interest in machinery:

He is seen chatting with one of the waiters about the guns they use in the war and is later able to correctly identify the type of German plane flying over the hotel.

Later on in the season, The Halcyon's general manager and head concierge are trying to fix the hotel generator and lamenting that Billy was the one who always maintained it before he left to join the army. (I will come back to this later because omg)

Billy himself mentions to his mum at one point that he's planning on helping a neighbor with some things she needs done in her shelter and that he expects it to be a quick job.

When he joins the army, he's put in charge of operating one of the anti-aircraft guns - directing his fellow soldiers and being the one to manually operate the machine itself.

Now that I think I've covered every other Billy feel, I have to talk about... the worst one. The saddest one. His death. /:

I don't know how to say this without sounding like a complete [Michael Gavey voice] loooser, but I can't really think about Billy and his story in this show for too long without... crying? Oof.

I think that's a testament to just how well written his storyline was in this show. They make you care so fucking much about this sweet, innocent, pure-hearted, good to a fault, daft, brave young man so much that, when he dies in the Blitz, it really fucking hurts.

I swear, thinking about Billy Taylor deals psychic damage to me every time.

And I think that, part of the reason that Billy's death hurts so much is because of how it's shown to us. We all know the famous orange scene between Billy and Kate so I'm sorry for ruining it by making it sad, lol. But that scene ends with Kate telling Billy that she'll meet him the next morning to share the orange with him. So when morning comes and the hotel staff are arriving and see Kate waiting impatiently for "someone" who hasn't arrived, your heart fucking sinks immediately.

They don't even tell us about Billy's death by showing Peggy learning of the news. We're told through Kate's POV. He doesn't show up to their meeting in the morning and, when she arrives for her shift, the staff has been gathered around by the general manager. Only then do we learn that Billy was killed by a parachute mine the night before. And we follow Kate to the same closet where Billy gave her the orange, where she's sobbing and cradling the fruit in her hands.

But what's even sadder is that Billy remains a presence throughout the rest of the show. You, as the viewer, grieve him alongside not only his family, but also the people who knew him and worked with him.

When the hotel loses power during a bombing one night and the general manager and head concierge are trying to fix the generator, they're lost for what to do and even lost for words because Billy was the one who always handled the generator. They end up fixing the thing by taking a wrench and banging the side of it because "That's what Billy used to do." And it works. The generator turns back on thanks to Billy. Thanks to the memory of him. And the concierge look up and says, "Clever lad," as though Billy can hear him.

Of course, Peggy spends the rest of the season grappling with the loss of Billy, too. The other characters mention more than once that she's "talking about Billy as though he's still here" and that it's worrying them. Eventually, the general manager sits down with her and she says that she does know he's gone but that it's so hard to believe because she wants to think that he could just walk through the door at any moment.

But, oh my god, the saddest moment of the show for me... is the moment when Peggy is walking through the hallway in the staff area of the hotel and she sees one of the bellboys walking towards her. He has his head down so his face is in shadow but he's about the same height as Billy... and you can see in Peggy's face that she's allowing herself - just for that one moment - to imagine that it's Billy. To let herself think that he's still alive. You're watching her process the scene before her and seeing her think, "Could it be him?" for those few seconds... until she sees the bellboy's face. And, oh my god, it absolutely wrecks me every single time.

Billy's death is the reason that Peggy gives up the one thing she has left - Dora - and sends her away to the countryside along with the other children who are being evacuated from London. Because she can't bear the thought of losing her last living child.

Billy is the character who shows the audience how cruel and unforgiving the war is. That it can take anyone, no matter how sweet and kind and young and good the person is.

And it illustrates the enormity of the chasm they leave behind.

Billy's loss is felt in everyone, from his family to the people he worked with to the girl he had a crush on. AND IT'S FELT IN ME, TOO, GODDAMN

This was so long and I may not have even touched upon all of my feels but thanks for coming to my Billy Taylor TED Talk. I fucking love him. The writers did an amazing job writing him. 10/10, no notes whatsoever. I cry every single time.

He's such an underrated Ewan character and, I know I haven't mentioned it much, but Ewan's portrayal of him is flawless. He's perfect at capturing all the silliness, daftness, and earnestness that makes up our sweet little Billy!

Tl;dr - Everyone should love Billy Taylor!

Aaaand here's another gif of our sweet boy to end this massive post:

#welcome to my billy taylor ted talk #this is a mixture of billy taylor observations #and billy taylor feels #this character deserves so so so much love #billy taylor #ewan mitchell #the halcyon

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loveyourownsmiilee · 1 year

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Talking Buddie Language: Ep 6.10

Oh it feels so good to have our fire fam back!! Tonight’s episode was so amazing and heartbreaking all at once. I’m still not fully recovered from it but I think we got some amazing moments between both Buck and Eddie that show their relationship is on the cusp of changing forever. Now the process may be a slow one but I believe we are definitely on the ride to Buddie becoming canon soon! With that being said, let’s get into their body language and behaviors from this episode!

Sand Turns Into Glass?

The first scene we get is of the beach call and I literally learn so much from watching this show. For instance, that when lightning hits sand, it can become glass. I loved watching Buck and Eddie working together again because I feel like it really has been such a long time since we have seen them be partners.

B: No rain, where the hell did it come from? E: I don't know. Really hope it doesn't strike twice though.

(Gif by @whattarush)

I love how Eddie not only looks at Buck but is the one foreshadowing what is to eventually come later on in the episode. Some may even argue that he jinxed Buck with this sentence. With this little moment, we see our Buck and Eddie partnership shine through a little in the sense where they are back to talking to each other on calls as if they're the only ones there.

Then Buck, being Buck, leaves to go keep the kids busy so that they won't see their father in that state. My favorite little moment is Eddie looking over to Buck with the kiddos, while he is still working on their dad. The show always makes it a point to have Eddie's eyes be on Buck at all times. Now whether the reason is he just wants to make sure his partner is in his eye level at all times, or because he simply can't take his eyes off the tall blonde. Either way, the way that scene was shot, it was done so that the viewer can see Eddie looking over towards Buck, while he is continuing his task at hand.

As Buck tries to keep the children occupied, he explains how the glass was made and tries to reassure them while giving them some very important life advice.

B: Hey, hey I get it. You want to fix everything. Trust me I know that feeling. But in life, things that we don't expect, they can just come out of nowhere.

(Gif by @stevenrogered)

Now this I believe is also foreshadowing a couple of things for Buck. We all know he's the guy who likes to “fix things”, courtesy of Eddie. Right now however, there may be things that will come out of nowhere for Buck that will have him questioning everything, such as if he is able to fix those things. We can expect a few things to come from the ending of this episode and how they will affect him in different ways. He is just putting it out in the universe and now the universe will pay him back with those things that come from nowhere.

Father/Son Bonding In the Heart Of The Station

Literally my heart is so freakin full from that Buck and Bobby scene. Nobody can convince me that they are not father and son. Buck really does care for every single member of that team and it is just so wholesome. It will make it even more emotional for when everyone is beside themselves, waiting for him to come back from his coma. But this scene really was put in to showcase how strong Buck and Bobby's bond is so when Buck is in the hospital, Bobby's reaction to it will be even more heart wrenching.

The part that had my heart the most was when Buck took the spoon to Bobby to have him try his chili. Not only was that so freakin adorable, but oh so meaningful as well.

BN: Pretty good.

B: No don't give me pretty good. C'mon it's uh, it's not right. It's missing something.

BN: Well.

B: Is there a secret ingredient? There is c'mon it's me, spill.

BN: Cocoa powder. Unsweetened. Cabinet above the sink. One tablespoon.

This is a direct callback to that Buckley-Diaz family scene in 6.01 where Buck explains to his boys that he has perfected his lasagna, it only took 3 tries. We see him trying to make the chili as best as Bobby's is. Once again, the making of food is a metaphor used for something else in Buck's life. Here it's also kind of like when he asked Bobby for what makes him feel at ease/happy in 6.01. Bobby didn't really give him an answer then but he did give Buck the secret ingredient in this scene. Which in my honest opinion, foreshadows Bobby helping him uncover the secret to what he is looking for, further on down the line. I believe Bobby will play a significant role in having Buck open his eyes to certain things and certain people in his life. These writers love their metaphors and I really believe this is used for Bobby helping Buck uncover the secret to being happy eventually.

Chimney Venting to His Team

I love when we get to see the different dynamics of the team members. We so often have Chim venting to his number one confidant Hen, that I think it was lovely for him and Buck to really talk about Chim's father. Meanwhile, Hen and Eddie were also providing their two cents but not with exactly next to either of their partner.

It's such an unusual circumstance that even Chimeny makes a comment about it after Buck mentions how he was glad that it wasn't the Buckley's who brought the drama.

C: Your parents were on their best behavior. I don't know why but that's something new for me to worry about.

H: Why are you worried about a lack of trauma.

C: Because it's unnatural Hen. Like the two of you down there tossing that ball.

The reason why I find this little bit so interesting is that it's no secret that Eddie and Buck typically are attached at the hip. Meanwhile, Hen and Chim are thick as thieves. So the fact that Buck isn't the one throwing around that ball with Eddie, really seems like such an unnatural situation. This word is used a few times during this episode and each time it is, it’s directed at Eddie and Buck.

The camera then focuses on Eddie's reaction to that, where he looks up at Chim in a sassy and annoyed way, indicating that Chim is onto something. Eddie just doesn't like the fact that he's that predictable and Chim is the one voicing that. We know Buck and Eddie are codependent, so why show Eddie sorta annoyed with Chimeny's assessment? He didn't technically lie in that moment, which is why Eddie's reaction to that really intrigues me.

Buckley's vs Han's: The Epic Showdown

Oh this has been something I have truly been looking forward to for such a long time. I just want to preface this by saying I do not know who those two people were because those were not the Buckley parents I remember. It felt super weird seeing them get along with Buck like it was natural. But I want to talk about the whole sperm donor debacle.

Buck is already a little too involved for simply being just a donor. They're sending him pictures and involving him in this pregnancy and I really don't know where this storyline is headed but I just don't believe him when he tells his parents (and the Han's) that he "is the donor. Connor is the father." He still can't say that confidently and there definitely is a bit of sadness underlying his words. I can't watch that and come to terms that he has officially made peace with his choice. I don't think he fully has.

But a few things I would love to discuss. First his mother's reaction was that of once again viewing her son as nothing but parts.

MB: "I think it's...great. You're a miracle baby yourself Buck. Why not share it?"

A miracle baby? Yes he was born for the sole purpose of saving a child and he "failed" at that. And here he is now, giving life to another child since he couldn't do that for his own brother. His parents’ behavior is rather unusual and I was not expecting their full support with this storyline. It still breaks my heart to see them thinking of him in that way and I was even more surprised to see them at the hospital visiting their son when he's injured. This just goes to further prove that their love for him has always been shown when he's been hurt. I think that with the next episode, we will see the difference in how they react to their son being in the hospital vs how Bobby and Athena do, Buck's chosen family. We already got a glimpse of them sitting in the room with Buck, while the Buckley's were standing outside. So I am interested to see how all that plays out.

Mr. Han really voiced something important in his dislike for Buck being a donor that I think will play a pivotal role in the future.

SH: A man cannot raise a child fathered by another man. It's unnatural.

Here is that use of the word unnatural once again. isn't it ironic that unnatural was used to describe both Eddie and Buck by Chim and his father? Now let's dissect this a little bit.

When one thinks of a traditional family, historical that has been taught to us that it should be a man, a woman and their children. Anything different is considered to be "unnatural" right? Especially for people who live in other countries where it’s not accepted to be anything different from the “traditional norms” that’s been taught to them. So two men raising a child together will definitely be viewed as “unnatural” to those kind of people, in this case Mr. Han.

Well what does one call what Buck is doing with Eddie and Christopher? Oh that's right, he is helping raise another man's child with said man. We all know this, Eddie know's this considering he chose Buck to be his son's legal guardian, and I think Chris also knows this, given the fact that he is in Buck's hospital room visiting him while he is in a coma next week. I think the only person who doesn't know this at this point in time is Buck. Buck needs to realize that yes he helped create a child that will be his biologically that he has no claim to. But he also has a child who is not biologically his that he can and does have some claim to. It was powerful for those words to be said about Buck to him, especially when we know he is in this weird limbo and doesn't know what he is seeking for in life at the moment. It makes the timing of it perfect as well because it's said to him right before he gets massively injured. Now cue the child he is helping raise keeping vigil by his hospital bed, talking to him, begging him to come back to him. Then have Buck wake up and realize how important said child is to him, thus opening the door for further revelations in the future and I think we can have a big win here.

I don’t know what it was about this specific scene but something really tells me that the baby is not going to end up being Buck’s in the end. There’s a lot of talk about choices being made, and how it’s a miracle. Something has got to give. The universe kept screaming at him when he went to donate so there’s gotta be a catch in there somewhere right?

I do also want to discuss the Daniel of it all. It was weird but totally expected of Buck to bring up Daniel again considering this is the first we are seeing the Buckley's all together again since "Buck Begins". Him asking his sister about their dead brother point blank was needed because we all know it foreshadows his appearance in this alternate life he is going to dream up while in a coma.

B: Do you ever think about what it would've been like if Daniel had lived?

M: Yeah, sometimes. You?

B: I think it would've been just like this.

Oh baby, oh baby baby this is not going to end well. This basically foreshadows Daniel being alive in his alternate world, and everything is all happy go lucky upon first glance. But it's absolutely not. He doesn't have his chosen family, he doesn't have Eddie and Chris. So he will definitely have to live a life in which all the people who are so important to him and who all play a pivotal role in his life are just absent. Sure he will have his brother, but at what cost? At the cost of everyone else he loves? Surely this coma dream is going to result in Buck waking up with some clarity and a new perspective on his own life. One in which he can genuinely look at who he is, the people who are always there for him, and truly be at ease with it all.

Buck and Eddie, being Buck&Eddie

The scene with these two idiots in love in the truck is everything!! Buck was explaining the whole Buckleys vs Hans situation but ended it as it being "a nice night." I think the choice of having Buck and Eddie being the one's discussing this in the truck was very telling because once again, Eddie is stepping up and reassuring Buck whenever he is self conscious of something pertaining to his life, especially when it involves his parents. Eddie always has Buck's back and it shows in their cute little interaction.

B: Felt like we were an actual family.

E: You are an actual family.

B: I never felt that way before.

Ok but can we please talk about Eddie making eye contact with him to make sure that he knows Eddie isn't bullshitting him. He loves to check in with him via eye contact and make sure that Buck knows that what Eddie is saying is true. And what is Buck's immediate reaction to Eddie's reassurance? He smiles and looks down like he always does in that cute shy way. They behave like this all the time and it drives me crazy because it just isn't typical platonic friends behavior. There is too much fondness in Eddie's tone of voice and Buck can't keep that fond smile off his face.

Aside from the heart eyes though, it was so pointed to have Eddie be the one saying that they are an actual family when he’s fully welcomed and made Buck such an important member of his own family. Something about Buck never feeling that way before makes me think there’ll be a moment in which Eddie explains to Buck that he already has a family with him and Christopher. And Buck will stop and realize that oh, absolutely no one has ever made him feel that loved and that welcomed before in his life. That the Diaz’s saw him and immediately went, “He’s ours.” I can’t wait for them to circle back to this moment.

I love how it's been months and we still haven't heard Eddie's actual thoughts on the whole sperm donation. He goes so far as to mention the Buckley's reaction while simultaneously avoiding verbalizing his own thoughts on the matter.

E: Sounds like your family had your back on the whole donation thing, that's definitely progress.

B: No they uh, they totally thought that was an idiotic decision. They just weren't gonna let Chimeny's dad have the last word on anything.

Why Eddie thinks it is absolutely alright to look at Buck so openly like he hung the moon is beyond me!! Not only that but him chuckling when Buck mentions how his parents thought his choice was "idiotic" goes to show his agreement with that. I still believe that there is a deliberate reason as to why we have yet to hear Eddie's real feelings on that subject matter. I don't think we will hear it until after Buck's recovery, possibly not until Kameron and Connor reappear before the baby's set to be born. And when we do finally hear his opinions on this subject matter, I think it's going to be life altering for Buck, hence the lead up to it.

Lightning Does Strike Twice and It’s Telling You Both Something

I have yet to recover from the last few minutes of this episode. I love how we got one last flirting moment between Buck and Eddie as Eddie hooked Buck to his line. I love when Eddie does that because it's his own little way of making sure his partner is ok and nothing will happen to him. Eddie is getting a little bit more ballsy with his flirting, I will say that.

E: Alright cowboy, go get em.

B: Alright ahh.

(Gifs by @swiftiebuck)

The fucking smirk on Eddie's face paired with his unabashed fondness for Buck is what makes me believe he has to know on some level about his feelings for Buck. It's not only his smile but also Buck turning back to look at Eddie one last time before making his way up the ladder. These two always have a way of just sharing moments like this one where they check in with their eyes and for a moment, it's like they're the only ones in the world. Sure it came stem from being partners for 5 years. But it also comes from their unconditional love and trust that they've formed throughout those 5 years.

Nobody talk to me about Eddie's reaction to Buck being hit by lightning. Not only was the man thrown off from his place at the bottom of the ladder. But he didnt even hesitate to get back up, put on his helmet to go after his partner. His main concern in that moment was Buck and his safety. You can see the actual moment in which Eddie realizes that Buck is hanging limply from the ladder. His face morphs into absolute devastation and concern as he runs up the ladder. The sheer heartache in his voice is very prevalent as he treks up after his partner. He is scared, he is on a mission to get to him as soon as possible. My favorite moment is that the second he is at the top, he pulls Buck up towards him rather slowly lowering him. It's like Eddie needs to have him in his arms so that he can make sure he's alright. This also is such a stunning parallel to Buck pulling Eddie to safety after he got shot. Not only that but it’s also paralleling Buck digging for Eddie while he was buried, which was also coincidentally caused my lightning. The last Buck that he yells is so shattering because he is trying to keep it together and save his partner, while simultaneously crumbling on the inside. This is his partner both on and off the field. This is the very man who saved Eddie numerous times and now he can't simply pull him up?? I think this is going to somehow come back and be an issue for Eddie. Something about his survivor's guilt and the failure to pull Buck out is going to be something I can see Eddie struggling with while Buck is unconscious.

(Gifs by @matan4il)

(Gif by @whattarush)

When he does finally get Buck down to the rest of the team, they confirm what we already knew: he has no pulse. I think it was great to have Chim be the one who administers compressions not only because Buck is technically his brother in law, but also because it was supposed to be Chim who went up the ladder instead of Buck.

Lastly, the fact that Eddie ran as quickly as he could and pushed Bobby away so that he can get to Buck further proves how important they are to each other. Bobby pulling Eddie back, knowing that Buck doesn't have a pulse, and making him drive is very significant. It parallels Bobby pulling Buck away from digging for Eddie in "Eddie Begins." Bobby is a smart man and I believe he knows just how important these two are to one another. He didn't want Eddie to see his partner lifeless because he knows from prior experience how that turned out when the roles were reversed.

(Gif by @diazly)

Now Eddie was last seen driving the ambulance but I really do believe next week is going to be important for us to see his reaction. From the little promo we got, we already know that Eddie is the one who takes over as soon as they get to the hospital and is the one trying to keep his partner alive. He also looks absolutely devastated as he watches them taking Buck away through the doors. The fact that Eddie and Christopher were suspiciously missing from the promo tells me that their scenes will be significant and really get everyone's tears going. I, for one, am excited to see the aftermath of this and how everyone handles their Buck being in a coma and possibly flatlining again. It's going to be an excited and heart breaking episode next week and I can't wait to see what it has in store for us.

Thank you so much if you made it to the end. I got to say I do feel so vindicated that itty bitty coma!Buck theory from all those months ago finally happened and I can’t wait to see what stems from it! All my love to you darlings 💜

#buddie #buddie language meta #911 spoilers #911 speculation #911 on fox #911 meta #buddie meta #long post #sorry if this isn’t my best I’m hungover

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eviesaurusrex · 2 years

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ꜱᴇᴄʀᴇᴛꜱ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ꜱᴍɪʟᴇꜱ, ᴘᴛ. 1 | ꜱ. ꜱᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇ

GIF not mine!

Stephen Strange x Avenger!Reader

ask: Could you write a Stephen Strange x reader one shot (or longer if you feel it haha) where the reader is an avenger and she’s secretly dating Stephen? Like they’re sneaking around and staying at each other’s places (sanctum and tower/compound) and use portals in the mornings to get back where they’re supposed to be. Maybe a close call where Stephen literally kicks her off the bed and into a portal back to her own bed to avoid getting caught. Then later they’re found out somehow by tony/the team?

word count: 5.2k (and that's only part one, ooooooops)

warnings: fluff and more fluff, cursing, sneaking around the team, lying, one suggestive and kinda steamy (but short) scene

author’s note: I’m so excited about this ask! This will get a part 2 because I couldn’t contain myself, and I had to write this out with all the background stuff. I really hope you like how it went so far @clockblobber!

»pt. 2 is here«

Tiredness was settled deep within her bones, and every single muscle inside her body ached at the sheer thought of moving again. But YN felt the soft rumbling of the Quinjet’s engines increasing while the autopilot initiated the landing sequence to softly touch the ground again. The almost fifteen-hour flight in uncomfortable seats would be stuck to her for another few hours, if not days; she was sure of it. The mission may have been a success – taking down a cartel of experimental drug smugglers, with a side income through even more experimental weapons which were supposed to be destroyed alongside Hydra, had been easier than thought – but her body still was sore and covered in bruises, scratches, and beautifully blooming hematomas.

Guess a rib or two got a hit as well, the Widow thought while softly rubbing her right side.

Gladly, she wasn’t the only one beaten up, but unlike Steve and Bucky, she didn’t own the ability to self-heal within hours. Sometimes, she really envied them down to her very core. But now, she was too tired to even start feeling the jealousy about the super soldier serum running through their veins. Truth be told, she wasn’t entirely without an asset she had gained through otherworldly substances – not drugs – but those were hard to control sometimes, which was why the Widow often fully relied on her brutal training and skills in hand-to-hand combat.

One look in the direction of Nat, and she knew that her sister wasn’t very fond of her approach to the last situation. But hey, a woman gotta do what a woman gotta do. Easy as that.

As soon as the jet finally touched the ground, YN unbuckled the seatbelt and pushed herself up with a groan. The pain shot right through her body again and reminded her of the inevitable reality of upcoming days full of soreness. Assessing the level of pain and discomfort, she estimated two weeks tops. With a hot bath here and there, maybe less.

The thought of one of these alone made her almost moan in pure bliss. But, of course, the compound didn’t own such luxury known as a bathtub. God damn you, Tony.

With clenched teeth and jaw, the woman hobbled out of the Quinjet as soon as the ramp was lowered and granted a breeze of fresh air to invade the warm insides and cool her cheeks. Maybe a cold shower would suffice for now. But the woman didn’t come far before Steve’s voice dragged over the small tarmac in front of the newly built compound in Upstate New York.

“We need to debrief, and I need your report plus a medical evaluation of your status, YN,” the blonde soldier spoke up, always the authoritative fun brake (he wasn’t, but she was grumpy and needed a shower and some comfort in the form of her soft blankets and pillows). Without answering for now because she had her phone in hand to type a quick text, she raised the other hand and showed Steve the finger. Her body became used to the throbbing pain in every single limp again, and the Widow could walk a bit faster to get away from the now overbearing man she called one of her best friends.

“YN, I mean it. You’re not dismissed until you went to the medical wing and got checked out.” She could hear his heavy steps, and even though she still showed him the finger, she spoke. “Whatever, Steve. I need a shower and my soft bed, and I’m good to go, thank you very fucking much. See you tomorrow morning with that damn report in hand, bye.” Usually, she wasn’t this rude to him, and that pushed him to stop in his tracks.

Before scurrying inside the compound, she could hear the other’s talk.

“Did I do something wrong?” Steve.

“Nah, she is just grumpy because I stole her that one guy she loved to punch in the face.” Bucky.

“The one that laughed because she is a woman? Well, you fucked up good, Barnes. She really loves to take those down herself.” Nat.

An apology was necessary, she knew that, but… later. Her mind was too tired to do it now, so she just walked to her room, always close to one of the walls – just in case. With a heavy sigh leaving her lips, she pushed open the door to her cozy room and let the duffel bag fall straight to the floor before pushing herself to walk the last few steps, so she could fall face down first onto the soft mattress.

Which wasn’t the best idea she had had all day, and a strained groan escaped her lips at the same moment as the soft sounds of an opening portal filled her room. She barely realized it. She didn’t even move as steps started to come closer. She didn’t move a single muscle until the mattress dipped at the weight of another body settling upon it. Slowly, YN moved her head from the face-down position to the side to eye the man with the pepper and salt hair. He already looked down at her, forehead wrinkled and the all too familiar deep creases between his dark brows visible.

“Hey,” the woman spoke, barely above a whisper, and she closed her eyes soon again as one of his warm, big hands came close to her face to brush over her cheek and push a lock behind her ear. “Rough day?” She nodded but stopped suddenly at the ugly feeling of raw skin rubbing against the fabric of her comforter. Eyebrows furrowed, and a hiss escaped her. But Stephen was prepared – just as he always was. “Come on, love,” he mumbled in the softest of tones. “We’ll get you a nice hot bath ready, a cup of tea, and some snacks, while I stitch you up.”

With that, the previous portal opened again, illuminated the room in its soft golden light, and Stephen helped the tired woman up from her bed. He held both her hands and pulled her up onto her feet, steadying her with his arm around her slender waist. He could imagine what happened during that mission in Seoul, her state not an uncommon sight for his eyes but hard on him nevertheless. It was easy for him to get scratches and be beaten up – he didn’t mind that – but seeing her in that constitution was something entirely different. And this side was a side no one knew about – and no one would ever get an insight about.

Looking up to Stephen, she allowed him to scoop her into his arms and circled both her arms around his neck while pressing a soft kiss onto his cheek. “You are a godsend,” YN whispered against his skin, the tip of her nose caressing his skin in a feathery touch. The doctor smiled the one smile that was entirely reserved for her eyes and only hers. “Not an idiotic and presumptuous asshole anymore?” He had to tease her with the statement that the Widow had smacked him with the second time they had met. A forceless hit with the flat hand against his shoulder was the first reaction he got. “Thought we already had put that in our past. It was a miscalculation. An assumption made upon false input and intel.”

Stephen chuckled while stepping over the threshold of his portal, right into his bedroom in the Sanctum Sanctorum, the busy New Yorker streets underneath the big windows. He didn’t spare a glance at the golden streets out there, glowing in the light of the setting sun. Instead, he carried the woman in his arms straight into the adjacent bathroom with the bathtub she craved the most. “I just love teasing you, darling,” the sorcerer grinned while gently putting YN down on the bathtub’s edge, and with a flick of his hand, the two faucets opened and unleashed the water.

Soon the bathroom was not only filled with the soothing sound of splashing water but with the wafting steam and the smell of her most favorite bath bomb as well. In the meantime, Stephen had organized the promised tea and snacks – consisting of cheese, crackers, and strawberries – while preparing the first aid kit for the small surgery he would perform on the most severe cuts that needed some stitching. As she attempted to step into the waiting hot water to let her bones and muscles soak in the well-deserved break, the phone in the back pocket of her combat gear pants, that pooled in the center of the bathroom, started to ring. The sorcerer was quick to peel it out and hand it to his girlfriend, not daring to accept the call or send it straight to the voicemail like he would’ve preferred.

With a sigh, YN accepted the call; a fluffy towel wrapped around her naked body, and she could see the hits that had attacked her visibly on her skin through the full-length mirror opposite her. “What?” That was all she asked the unwanted caller – who needs a greeting, right?

Shuffling was heard on the other side of the call, and YN cocked an eyebrow as whispered voices pushed to her ear. She took a look at the caller ID and didn’t get it. “Whoever thought it would be the greatest freaking idea to call me can go and fuck themself. I just want some peace and quiet, for fucks sake. Is that too much to ask?” YN was pissed to an extent she hadn’t felt in a long time. Another round of shuffling until Thor’s voice spoke up. “Lady YN, this is Thor, God of Thunder.” Facepalming herself, the woman sent Stephen a helpless look. “You don’t need to introduce yourself, Thor. I know who you are. This is a call, not a formal application for a new job.” What, in the name of the universe, had she done in her past life to be graced with this group of insufferable people? She loved them dearly, but sometimes they were just too exhausting for her poor soul. “Yes, of course, Lady YN. Mr. Stark had specifically asked me to start this conversation in order to learn about the nature of your whereabouts.”

Groaning, she hit the edge of the full tub with her fist. “Stop being such a child and talk for yourself, Tony,” she demanded. “Can’t. Have to find your location.” Eye rolling, YN knew that he knew that she had never touched one of his phones and had made sure that her location wouldn’t be found by any of them. Not even the genius that was Tony Stark. “Yeah, whatever. Good luck with that. You lot could’ve just, I don’t know, asked if I’m alright wherever I am and put it aside because I’m a fucking grown woman. Gosh.” Stephen chuckled softly at her outburst while preparing the needle for the stitches. “Plus, it was never my idea to call. Ask our ancient ice sculpture who had the idea to check up on you and found your room empty and throwing a tantrum about it,” Tony added, and YN softly smiled as the sorcerer knelt in front of her on the plush bathroom matt to take a closer look on the gush near her left wrist. “For fucks sake, Steve. Remember when I told you that your overbearing nature isn’t cool? It wasn’t a joke; I meant it!” Her face twisted at the sudden burn under her skin, and saw the drenched cotton pad, Stephen softly dapped over the wound to clean the dried blood off. “I’m sorry, YNN. Really, I am. But you took some pretty hard hits, and I just wanted to make sure you’re alright. You are okay, are you?”

Sighing again, YN leaned her head against Stephen’s shoulder. “I am. And now I have to go.” – “Wait, YN, where are yo-…” – “Byyyyye!”

And with that, she hung up and threw the phone back on the dirty pile of combat gear. “They’re getting suspicious?” She shrugged at his question and let him take the fluffy towel away from her, so she could finally sink into the hot water. “I don’t know what’s going on in their brains. And I don’t want to think about it.” With closed eyes, YN leaned back in the tub, softly moaning as she felt how every single muscle relaxed. “I’m almost tempted to believe that you only agreed to date me because of my bathtub,” the man chuckled while sitting on the edge and starting to stitch her arm.

In moments like these, he used that bit of magic he needed to steady his hands, but it was the only exception he made. “You don’t have to do it, y’know? I can easily head to the med bay,” YN mumbled after Stephen had finished his task of taking care of her, and he bent down to press a lingering kiss on her forehead. “Don’t make a fool out of yourself, darling. It’s my pleasure.”

He wanted to leave to pack the first aid kit back at its usual spot, but her fingers intertwining with his made him pause. One look at her pleading eyes, and the man was lost, his mental to-do list burned to ashes at her feet. “Can you get in? I’d love some cuddles.” It was a shyly asked question, as usual, but just as usual, he started to undress even before he nodded. “Whatever you need, darling,” he whispered after settling behind the woman in the still hot water – her body between his long legs, her back pressed against his chest, arms entangled underwater, and her face nestled in the crook of his neck.

Her deep breaths and soft skin against his were all he ever needed after days of her presence gone due to missions or his own duties, and Stephen craved those few stolen moments in a world where nobody knew about them.

;

Morning came too soon, and YN dragged herself out of the comfort of the warm bed to gather her belongings in order to make a move as soon as Stephen was awake enough to conjure the portal into her bedroom. She just left the bathroom, the pile of combat gear now over her arms, as Stephen yawned and felt around on the other side of the bed where she had laid only minutes ago. The sorcerer wasn’t a deep sleeper, but she was a Widow, trained in the arts of stealth, so it was an easy task to sneak out without waking him up. But even after more than a year of dating, he seemed not to be used to it because at the feeling of nothingness next to him, Stephen sat up abruptly and frantically started looking through the room. His mouth opened to call her name, heart racing in his chest, until his gaze settled upon the woman, only clad in one of his shirts that reached her mid-thighs.

She smiled, combat gear already dropped to the floor, to walk over to him. YN stood next to his bedside, both hands cupping his jawline while her thumb soothingly caressed his cheek, while she pressed a kiss against the corner of his mouth, the feeling of his goatee present on her lips. She could practically feel how he relaxed at her touch and leaned into it, reminding her again that Stephen was as touch starved as she was. It wasn’t a real turn-on for folks if she talked about the abusive past she had to endure in order to become her strongest self. But hey, those foolish boys were nothing in comparison to the man in front of her.

“Bad dream?” She softly asked before pecking the tip of his nose with a soft, feathery kiss. The sorcerer shrugged nonchalantly, but he couldn’t fool her – and he knew that. Sighing, Stephen pulled her back into the bed, holding her close, and nuzzled his face in the crook of her neck. “I just don’t want to let you go again. Didn’t see you in four days.” It was a mumble, but YN could hear every single word and felt his lips moving against her collarbone. Slowly, she started to play with his hair – just the way he liked it – and scratched his scalp. “Caution, my love, or I could be tempted to think you’re touch starved and crave my presence.”

Stephen scoffed and pushed himself up with one arm to look into her eyes. “You know how it is, darling.” It was only a mumble because even though they opened up to one another like they never did before, Stephen was still wary if it wouldn’t bite his ass. But so far, the amazing woman underneath him never let him feel any doubts. She smiled softly up at him and pulled him in for a soft kiss. “I’m not sure if they’re ready. You know how they are. You know what Tony will say, something about not fraternizing with colleagues and all that bullshit, and you know that Steve will give you a hard time – shit, he would even give me a hard time about it.” The prospect of trouble in paradise alone made her nauseous. They constantly bickered, true, but it was all fun and smiles. With something like that, on the other hand… Stephen knew how it went.

“At least stay for a few more minutes?” He almost begged, something he would never admit, not even under torture, but YN kissed him gently and shook her head. “Need to write that damn report and get a going to the med bay if I don’t wanna get benched.” With that, the sorcerer released the Widow out of his grasp and opened the portal into her own bedroom. He stood on his side while YN scurried over onto her side but turned around to kiss him goodbye properly. “See you for dinner?” Stephen smiled down at her, nodded, and kissed her forehead. “Chow House?” Moaning, YN pulled him in for another kiss. “I know why I love you,” she grinned, and then she waved with a smile as the portal closed again, and she was back in her cozy room, the duffel bag now lying on top of the cushioned bench in front of her bed – its usual spot. Shaking her head, she made a mental note to thank Steve for it later that day.

;

Sitting at the huge glass table in one of the conference rooms inside the compound, YN listened intently to what Fury said over the video call, scribbling away notes inside that little notebook she always carried around for such occasions. She could feel a lingering stare settled upon her, and barely noticeable, she raised her gaze to catch Stephen staring at her over the cup of coffee he held between his softly shaking hands. A smile tried to tuck at her lips, but instead, she rolled her eyes as if he was as irritating as the uncomfortable seat she had sat on ever since the briefing started.

“Do I bore you, Miss LN?” Fury’s tone sounded bored himself, and YN showed him a pair of raised eyebrows. “No, sir. I’m just writing down what you’re saying. For later purposes.” Sam coughed and mumbled “Boaster” between his acts, and YN threw her eraser against his head. “Hey!” She smiled the sweetest of smiles and flipped him off. “I’m not deaf, Wilson.” Bucky chuckled behind his mug while Steve and Nat rolled their eyes, and Fury sighed exaggeratedly. “Behave, children,” he grumbled before continuing with the briefing about a new mission in Switzerland.

A half an hour later, the briefed team scattered over the compound after they had left the conference room, and YN found her way into the kitchen. Her stomach rumbled ever since she woke up to an empty bed because Stephen had to leave to get ready for said briefing.

On some days, it was exhausting to sneak around everyone, but it had its purpose. So far, they never had a close call, for which YN was more than grateful.

Softly humming, she rummaged in the fridge before moving to the cupboards after she decided that tea was more to her taste than one of the smoothies Pepper hoarded in one of the many fridges.

Suddenly, big familiar hands grabbed her jeans-clad hips and turned her around in one swift motion. Looking up, her eyes met the bluest ones of them all, and a smile etched itself on her face before she took a measured look to the entrance. After she gave herself an all-clear, YN pulled Stephen down to her level while pushing herself on her tiptoes and kissed him – hard and hungrily because the couple couldn’t stop showing their deep lingering affection for one another as often as possible, which was not often enough.

Labored breaths and lips crashing against one another were the only sounds in the kitchen – or the entire compound wing – and Stephen wrapped the woman tighter in his arms, pulling her closer and closer until their bodies were pressed against each other. His hands moved more south to grab the Widow under her thighs, long fingers stretching up to her butt cheeks, and he lifted her with astonishing ease up on the countertop. Settling there, YN wrapped her legs around his waist, crossed her ankles at his deliciously shaped behind, and burrowed her fingers inside his dark hair. The kiss grew more heated with every passing second, and a soft gasp escaped her mouth as Stephen pressed her lower region harder against him.

“I really hope you’re not thinking about canceling our dinner plans for tonight,” YN whisper-moaned at the friction between her legs and bit his lower lip gently. Stephen groaned at the sensation pulsing through his body – he still wondered how this woman was able to pull every trigger there was with nothing more than just a whisper of a touch – and kissed her again. “Why should I? I can’t wait for dessert. Maybe we should do dessert first, like responsible citizens,” he rasped, the raspiness in his voice always a trigger for her own pleasure. Gladly, Stephen didn’t know just yet how hot it made her hear him like that. If this man would ever gain the knowledge about that – it would be her downfall. Grinning, YN pulled away from his searching lips, teasing him. “Sounds like a plan, Doctor Strange.”

But before they could dive right back into the next heated kiss and continue this make-out session, approaching steps alarmed the Widow. With ease, she slid off the counter within seconds and positioned herself at the counter closer to the door before raising her voice.

“Oh, please. Stop prancing around and try to prove that you’re the smartest one. I can’t keep up with the bullshit coming out of that entitled mouth of yours. I have better things to do.”

Tony and Steve entered the kitchen, followed by a tired Clint, who clung to a mug of steaming coffee. The Stark was fast to assess the situation, and an icy expression settled on his face. “Is he annoying you again, YNN? I can do something about that, you just need to use the words.” Steve had his blonde brows furrowed and stared Stephen into the ground, but the sorcerer only shrugged and stole the tea she had finished preparing. “A simple conversation, that’s all. Keep your panties on, Stark, and thanks for the tea, LN.”

With that, the tall man walked past the group, mug in hand, and YN stared after him, mouth agape. “Hey, that was my tea, you tea stealing, obnoxious imbecile!”

Which meant in their secret language, I love you, idiot.

Steve turned towards her and shrugged. “Tell us, and we end him,” he offered, but all she did was roll her eyes and start to prepare another cup of tea while suppressing her heart from beating out of line.

That was a close call.

;

The soft tunes of the Best of Beethoven vinyl she had found in Stephen’s office echoed through the foyer of the Sanctum Sanctorum on a summer evening. The windows on the upper floor were open widely to let in the soft breeze from outside without getting the chills, and YN worked mindlessly in the perfectly stocked kitchen.

It wasn’t like that shortly after she had sat foot in the room supposed to feed hungry human beings. Instead, barely filled shelves and a half-empty fridge had greeted her, which was why many New Yorkers had seen a true Avenger walking their streets in a pretty summer dress – a sight none of them would have expected on this beautiful day or any days at all. But she didn’t mind the round eyes of kids and teenagers. The ogling stares of the male part of the grownup fraction were what put her on edge. But even them she could handle with closed eyes.

After a shopping spree in the grocery store down the block, YN had started to prepare dinner. It wasn’t often that she found the time and muse to cook, but when she did, she went all out because she wasn’t bad at it. Actually, she was quite good at the stove, even though she preferred baking over everything else.

The tune changed to Beethoven’s Violin Concerto in D major, Op. 61 – one of her favorites, even though the Red Room had forced her to start playing the violin – at the same time as the golden glow of a portal crept around the corner of the kitchen’s entrance. She just chopped the vegetables into the thinnest of slices as the soft but heavy feeling of fabric settled over her shoulders, and a red collar nudged her left cheek to get her attention.

“Well, hello to you too, Cloaky,” she greeted the magical relic, which resembled more a dog or cat than an ancient thing, with a smile. Soon after the first greeting, a set of arms wrapped around her, and a chin was planted on her shoulder. “Do I want to know how you got in?” Stephen asked, the grin audible in his voice. YN shrugged while chopping the rest. “Wong didn’t see me if that’s what you tried to find out.” Sometimes, her burglar skills were pretty useful, plus the building liked her – or Stephen had altered the spells that protected the Sanctum, but she liked the idea of a feeling and thinking building more.

“So, you thought instead of enjoying your first time off missions in the last couple of weeks, you break into the Sanctum to cook me dinner?” At her exciting nod, Stephen laughed softly and pressed a kiss to her temple. Cloaky settled onto her shoulders definitively – Stephen knew that it would stay there for quite some time now, but he couldn’t object because it was what he would do too – and instead, tried to help her, but YN hit his fingers. “Nope. You’re gonna take a hot, long shower to destress from whatever threat it was today you had to deal with, and after that, you’ll settle on that bar stool over there, drink a glass of whiskey and just look pretty and handsome while I wrap up dinner.” He would never admit it, but he loved it when she tried to boss him around. It was so different from the life she had lived before joining the Avengers and escaping the grasp of the Red Room, so it was his pleasure to let her boss around to her heart's desire. “Yes, ma’am. Anything else, ma’am?” She grinned up at him. “A kiss would be absolutely lovely.”

Stephen complied and bent down to taste her sweet, perfect lips, but Cloaky suddenly had other plans and pulled her onto the wooden floor. “What the…?” Both started, but Wong’s voice let her suck in the last word and hold her breath. The red cloak pulled her further to the kitchen island to hide her body against the wood and wrapped itself around the woman it was so fond of.

“Something smells divine.” Wong stopped at the frame between the kitchen and one of the many living rooms to eye Stephen. “You are cooking? Since when is this a possibility?” Stephen looked from the stove to Wong, back to the chopped vegetables and the casserole where YN had started to place the thin slices in an intricate pattern. “Yeah…” The sorcerer began and shrugged. “I saw something on my way home and thought it looked quite delicious.” Wong squinted his eyes suspiciously at the other sorcerer. “Aha.” YN on the floor really wanted to facepalm herself. “Well, let me know when the food is ready. I want to try it. I’m in the library upstairs.” And Wong disappeared as suddenly as he arrived.

Sitting up, YN patted the proudly moving cloak and shook her head. “Next time, you won’t drag me down to the floor, understood? That hurt.” Stephen helped her up and took Cloaky from her shoulders, and sent him up into his bedroom. “Another close call,” the man objected, and YN sighed. “I know, but I don’t know why we’re running out of luck all of a sudden. We were so good.” It didn’t sit right with her, and the realization that maybe, sooner rather than later, they need to come clean with everyone.

Stephen softly kissed her head and pushed a lock out of her face, tracing her jawline from her ear back down to her chin. He took it between his fingers, pointer finger underneath it to softly nudge it up, so she would look at him. “Whatever will happen, nothing is worse than being stuck in a fake octopus, smelling like plastic and trash, darling.” Eye rolling, the woman shoved against his chest. “Never remind me of that ever again. I had to soak for hours on end in that bathtub to get the smell off my skin.” Stephen smiled but cocked an eyebrow to see her nodding. And she did. “Okay, yeah. It won’t be the end of days if they knew, but… I don’t know how to tell them. Could we take some more time? Just a little while longer?”

Stephen could never deny her a single request, so he approved with another nod and kissed her softly on the lips. “Of course, love. But now you have to move your sexy bottom because Wong demanded food. I’m gonna take a quick shower and be right back.” With that, Stephen kissed her one last time and stepped through the portal – lazy sock – and YN continued with the veggy pattern inside her prepared casserole until an all too familiar voice startled her.

“I knew it!”

With wide eyes, the former assassin turned around to look straight into the very pleased face of non-other than Wong, and a curse fell off her lips.

One for them, minus one for us, she thought while explaining to the sorcerer how she came up with her altered receipt for Ratatouille.

Thank you so much for reading! As usual, comments, reblogs, and likes are much appreciated! <3

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