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hairmetal666 · 8 months

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Eddie Munson gets famous at fifteen, after a YouTube video goes viral.

He's the kind of famous where he can't leave his house without being mobbed; where his name is plastered across grocery store tabloids and every fifth Pop Crave post; who has to make special arrangements with stores, whose body guards have body guards, who's forgotten what it's like to be normal. He's the kind of famous with well-chronicled stints in and out of rehab

And he thinks, at thirty, why not do a reality show? Why not let everyone in the world into his life because they're there anyway?

There's this guy on the crew, beautiful as a fucking sunrise. He's all golden-tanned and chestnut-haired, with these big hazel eyes that makes Eddie stomach swoop deliciously whenever they happen to meet his.

His name is Steve.

And Eddie, well. He's learned his lesson about jumping into relationships. So, Steve is nice to look at, and that's all there is to it.

---

They're at the studio, and Eddie, he only smokes when he's recording but he's "not allowed" to do that inside. So, he steps out into the alley behind the building, eyes falling shut as he hands search his pockets for his pack of Camels and his Zippo.

"I didn't realize you smoked," a deep voice says from the darkness.

Eddie startles, eyes flying open. Steve is leaning against the brick of the building, cigarette perched between his pursed lips.

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. I'm Steve. With the crew."

"Eddie," he answers by instinct.

"I know," Steve chuckles. His hazel eyes are golden in the yellow streetlight.

"Oh, right." He lights his cigarette and inhales deep.

"I really like what you're doing in there." Steve nods his head towards the studio.

"You a fan?"

"Never listened to you much before. Not really a metal kinda guy, but I like it."

People aren't usually honest with Eddie. It's refreshing.

"Glad you're getting into it! How's your--uh, job going?"

Steve laughs. "First assistant camera, that's my job." Eddie's expression must read a total blank, but Steve only smiles. "I make sure everything's in focus while we film"

"Is that--hard?"

"Sometimes," Steve agrees. "How do you like being the star of a reality show?"

Eddie huffs out a breath. "It's more fun than I expected. Like, sure it's weird to have you guys follow me around, but at least I invited you, you know?"

Steve's dark eyes are fathomless in his perfect face. "You'll let me know? If anything happens that you don't like?"

Eddie nods, taken aback by the serious line of Steve's pretty mouth. Before he can respond more, the back door creaks open, Gareth's backlit shape leaning into the alley. "Eddie? They're ready for you."

"Duty calls." He smiles at Steve as he stomps out his cigarette. "See you around."

---

Eddie goes to a house party in the hills. It's just a handful of people, all of them he's known for years, no cameras in sight.

Someone asks how things are going with the band. Eddie doesn't think anything of it. Why should he, among friends? Why should he when they already know the resentment that Gareth, Jeff, and Freak have for him? Eddie got signed and not his band. The guys--they never really forgave him, think he could have tried harder.

So, he says--he says--"I wish they didn't resent me so goddamn much still. To this day! They're millionaires and they're pissed at me? Fuck that. I got them here. I got us all here."

They're filming the next day at Eddie's house. He's working on a new song, engrossed in his acoustic and his notebook.

He's so in the zone, it takes him a second to register when Gareth bursts into the house.

"Fuck you, Munson," Gareth screams. "What the fuck is this shit?" Eddie's own voice pours from Gareth's phone, and Eddie's stunned speechless for dozens of seconds as he tries to comprehend what's happening.

"I didn't--" he tires. He raises his hands placatingly, but his minds a whirlwind, thoughts a tangle, heart a mess of betrayal and hurt and fear.

"We should be fucking grateful?" Gareth yells. "You spoiled piece of shit, fuck you!" He lunges towards Eddie, but Steve darts from behind the camera, moving to block Gareth's path.

"Stop filming," Eddie shouts. He lifts his arms to block the shit. "Get out," he snaps at the crew. " Now!"

He and Gareth scuffle towards a set of double-doors, heated words low and unintelligible.

"Don't come in." He tells the crew. "Steve, I mean it. Tell them to stop."

Eddie shoves Gareth into the other room, slamming the door behind him. Still, the mics pick up the screaming fight between the two men.

Hours later, Eddie finally makes his way back to the main part of the house, finds Steve standing at the kitchen island.

"Why are you still here?" He's too exhausted from the fight to put any inflection into it.

"I was wo--I wanted to make sure everything was okay," Steve says. He relaxes against the island. "Are yo--is everything okay?"

Eddie's laugh is humorless. "Something like that."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

The tears he kept at bay with Gareth prick at his eyelids until they burn. "Not really, no."

Steve nods. "We could--you wanna watch a movie?"

This startles a laugh out of Eddie, one that has tears flooding his eyes and he has to blink fast, look down, anything so Steve doesn't notice.

"You know what I want?" he says. It's soft enough that maybe Steve, across the kitchen, wouldn't hear.

"What?"

"To have friends who won't sell me out for a couple thousand bucks." The tears start falling, his throat choked with emotion.

He wants to stop, embarrassed to be crying in front of Steve, but now that he's started, sobs shake his shoulders and he can't keep quiet.

Steve reaches for him. "Is this okay?" he whispers, hands rubbing circles against his back.

Eddie nods, cries for a while as Steve makes soothing motions against his back.

"I just wish I was normal," he mumbles when he has words again.

Steve's hold on him tightens. "I'm sorry, Eddie."

Shame hits him then, too hard to ignore, and he steps away. "I'm gonna--I'm gonna go. I--Thanks again."

He ignores the sound of Steve calling him back.

---

Eddie's playing a show. He's playing a show in a small club, something he hasn't been able to do for years, but he's doing it right now. It's electric, vibrating through his body, the crowd screaming along with every word.

So much of this is because of Steve, and Eddie can't think about it, because men like Steve aren't for guys like Eddie.

As he plays, his eyes scan the small crowd, find Steve easily. He's gazing at Eddie, lips slicked pink and parted, eyes shining. Eddie knows this look; the naked desire obvious. A heat he never lets himself feel for Steve blooms low in his abdomen, but--

He wails into his mic, forcing his thoughts away from that path. He has a show to play, one that's pumping his veins full of satisfied adrenaline. Nothing can ruin it.

When the show ends, Eddie is high, endorphins and adrenaline pounding through his bloodstream.

Eddie, the band, and the film crew make their way out the club's backdoor. There's a car idling close by, but they only get a few steps in before there's shouting; the ear-shattering click of dozens of camera shutters; overwhelming burst of flashes.

Eddie is disoriented, dizzy; the rapid shift from the best night he's had in years, to this, mobbed by paparazzi, people screaming his name, crowding their small group. He stumbles, black spots still obstructing his vision.

Arms catch around him, holding him steady. "You okay?" Steve asks.

Before he can answer, one of the paps yells, "Munson's wasted! Can't even walk!"

"C'mon, Ed, I've got you," Steve says.

"Just get into the booze, Munson, or someone had Molly too? Maybe a little coke? That used to be your thing, right? Snort a little blow and do a show?"

Eddie tenses, almost stops, but Steve keeps him going.

The crowd surges around them, more voices yelling, more flashbulbs popping, the guy saying, "He can't even stand without help! You got a real problem you know?"and he just--can't anymore. He whirls out of Steve's grasp, lunges for the guy.

"What's your fucking problem, man?" Eddie hisses. "What did I do to you, huh?"

"Real tough, Munson, huh?" The man sneers. He shoves Eddie hard, knocking him back a few steps.

Eddie's vision fuzzes out, brain buzzing. He snarls, knows he does, knows he's losing it, can't make it stop.

Strong arms wrap around his waist, pull him off his feet. He fights it until he's pressed into a wall, until cold hands cup his face.

"Baby, baby, you have to calm down," Steve murmurs. "You have to breathe, can you do that for me?"

"I want--he can't--I--"

Steve presses harder against him, bodies joined. "You're having a panic attack, yeah? Can you breathe with me, baby? Match me?"

Eddie nods, tries, wants to be good for Steve.

He calms, as much from the breathing exercise as being held by the most beautiful man he's ever seen. Pressing his face against Steve's neck he says, "why are you always around for my worst moments? I'm such a fucking mess."

"I don't think you're a mess," he says. "I think you've gotten hurt, you've gotten cornered. And your reactions are normal."

"Why do you even care?" Eddie asks.

Steve doesn't even pause. "Cause I like you, Eddie." His hold tightens for a second. "I like you a lot."

Eddie scoffs. "Yeah, you like Eddie Munson, the hot rockstar. Not the loser who cries in your arms"

Cold air hits Eddie as Steve steps away to meet Eddie's eyes. You want to know something? I didn't expect to like you at all. I admit, I bought into all the stories on the internet. But you were never anything like that, Ed. Not even once."

Steve takes a deep breath, turning away as his cheeks grow pink. "And you--you're always going out of your way for people. The day I knew I was gone for you? Three weeks into filming. There was this kid interning. You didn't know a thing about him, just some twenty-year-old, and you sat down and talked to him. Were genuinely interested in everything he said."

"Steve," Eddie's voice breaks. He has to cover his mouth, lips a wobbling mess.

"I want to give you normal, Eddie, as much as I can. If you'll let me."

The moisture tumbles free from his eyes, streaking down his cheeks. Eddie laughs. "God, Steve, you're--I like you, too."

Steve brushes the tears away. "So, you'd go on a date with me?"

"I think I would really like to go on a date with you, yeah."

Steve leans in, slow and gentle, placing a soft kiss at the corner of Eddie's mouth. It lights him up like a fresh struck match, nerve endings on fire. He thinks it's so much more than like already.

"Take me home, sweetheart," he says.

"Getting fresh with me, Munson," Steve smirks. "I won't have you using your rockstar wiles to seduce me."

Eddie's laugh echoes off the brick of the surrounding buildings. "Oh, sweetheart, my rockstar ways will destroy you."

"That a promise?"

---

Six months later, the first and only season of Welcome to Hell premieres. Instead, of chronicling a rockstar's debauched and wild lifestyle, it's a soft and charming love story. It shows Steve and Eddie growing closer, Steve working late into the night, to give Eddie the hint of normalcy he's so desperate for, to make him happy. It shows Eddie's eyes track Steve across a room, something like sadness crossing his face. It shows a concert that Steve arranged, the fight with the pap outside the venue, brief glimpses of Steve and Eddie in the aftermath, the gentle kiss.

In the last interview of the season, the producer asks Eddie if there will be a season two of Welcome to Hell.

Eddie smiles, glances off camera, which pans to find Steve in worn jeans and a Metallica hoodie, hair messy and wearing glasses. He gazes at Eddie, smiles this soft, aching thing.

"Nah, I don't think I need it anymore," Eddie answers. Throwing the camera a smile that matches Steve's.

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lees-chaotic-brain · 7 months

Note

For your recent event can I request

Blue Ocean and #2

Thank you

Three Little Words (Gojo x Reader)

CW: rejection, blood, slight spoilers for the jjk movie, implied past satosugu i guess, mutual pining, reader is female, implied death, brief mentions of blood, mentions of injury

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"Sorry, not interested."

Three little words. Three little words was all it took to shatter your heart.

You had spent the last three years of your life trying to track down the person attached to the other end of your soulmate thread.

All that time spent hoping. All that time spent daydreaming about what he would be like, only for this.

For you to meet him because he was your new coworker, and fellow teacher at Jujutsu Tech. For him to reject you upon first sight.

You hadn't even spoken a word yet. All it took was him glancing at the red ribbon connecting the two of you for him to shut you down.

Your mind went blank. There was no way you heard him correctly, right...?

"What?"

"I'm not interested."

He stated casually, as if he was just commenting on the weather.

"You-You don't even know my name yet!"

With all logic having flown out the window, this was the best you could come up with.

"Oh, you're right. What's your name?"

Stupefied, you told him.

"That's pretty. Anyways, it's not you, it's me."

Taking your blank gaze as understanding, he perked up.

"My name's Gojo Satoru. I hope we can be friends!"

With an enthusiastic handshake, he was off, leaving you standing in shock, unsure of what just happened.

Reaching up and touching your cheek, you were surprised to find that it was wet.

Huh, that was strange. When did you start crying?

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

Days turned to weeks turned to months.

At first, things were a little awkward between you and your soulmate.

You were hurt, angry and confused. But the more time you spent with him, the more those feelings ebbed away, his presence a balm that soothed all your hurts and insecurities.

Why. Why did he have to reject you? Why did he have to be so insufferable? Why did he have to be so goddamn attractive? Why did he have to be aware that he was so goddamn attractive?

Why couldn't he send you any clear signals?

One day he was playfully calling you his 'best bud' while the two of you played pranks on Nanami or got into mischief.

And the next he was tenderly cupping your cheek and running his thumb over the dark bags under your eyes; concern evident on his face as he quietly asked if you were doing okay, and telling you to take a break.

And if he really wasn't interested, why didn't he officially break the soulmate bond? Why did he change the subject every time you tried to bring it up?

It was driving you insane. You were falling for him. And hard. But the echo of his words replayed in your head every time you considered broaching the subject.

You didn't know what to do.

So you did the only thing you could; you kept it professional. After all, the two of you were coworkers, nothing more, nothing less.

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

Gojo was tired of just being your coworker.

He wanted more. Had wanted more from the moment he laid eyes on your breathtaking face.

Sure, it had broken a visceral part of him to reject you, but if it was to keep you safe, he would do it a million times over.

However, no matter how much he told himself he couldn't be with you, that he had to officially sever the soulmate bond, he couldn't bring himself to officially break the tie that made the two of you soulmates.

The more time he spent with you, the more time he got to spend with you, the harder he fell.

He had never felt like this towards anyone. The only person that had ever come close before this had been Suguru, but his relationship with him had been soured by the fact that they both knew Gojo's soulmate was out there.

But when you were in his life, his entire world lit up. Everything was brighter and more vibrant. He felt like you saw him for Satoru, the man he was, instead of the burdens fate and Jujutsu society had placed upon his shoulders.

So selfishly he had kept the soulmate bond intact.

And now, staring at your mangled form laying before him, the precious blood that belonged in your veins leaking out onto the floor as you struggled to breathe, he remembered.

He remembered why he wasn't allowed to love. Why he had pushed you away.

God, he was so stupid to think that Suguru wouldn't go after you. He was so stupid for believing that his friend wasn't irredeemable.

And his stupidity and selfishness could very well cost you your life.

"You never change, do you."

Only then did Gojo realize that he had been speaking aloud, voicing his inner turmoil as the two people he cared for most lay dying before him.

Suguru coughed, wincing as the motion aggravated his injuries.

"You say that she's injured because you selfishly clung to your soulmate bond, right?"

"What are you implying Suguru?"

Gojo asked, weariness and heartbreak in his voice as he applied pressure to your injuries. He couldn't take you to get help until he took care of Suguru, but he wanted to give his former best friend a chance to say his last words.

"What I'm saying is that she got hurt because you were selfish, yes, but not in the way you think you were. You aren't selfish because you refuse to break the bond. You were selfish because you kept your distance. You could've come to her rescue much earlier, but you didn't because doing so would admit that she meant something to you. And you were more comfortable keeping her at a distance, because you didn't want to have to fear losing her."

Suguru sighed, shifting to a more comfortable position.

"You know, I never hated the people at Jujutsu Tech. If she survives, tell her how you really feel. She deserves at least that. And after that, tell her I'm sorry, okay."

Gojo barked a laugh, tears burning the backs of his eyes as a looming sense of grief and apprehension filled him. He knew what he had to do next.

"Okay, I will."

He smiled.

"Wingmanning me till the end. My best friend."

His face softened as he reminisced on better times.

"My one and only."

Suguru returned the smile, and Gojo finished him, gently closing his eyes afterwards.

Standing and wiping the tears from his eyes, he turned and picked you up, before stepping into a new chapter of his life.

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

When you woke up, you were greeted by the bright white of the hospital ceiling.

Groaning, you attempted to sit up, only to be stopped by the massive man-child sprawled across your lap.

With a snort, he shot up, disoriented as he rejoined the land of the waking.

Noticing you were awake, he froze, before reaching out and grabbing your hands.

"Can I say something?"

"Right now?"

You asked, a little confused as to what could be so important that he was waiting at your bedside for you to wake up.

"Yes."

His unusually somber tome threw you off.

"Of course. What's the matter?"

"I'm so sorry."

"Um, I'm confused. For what?"

"For rejecting you. This is by no means any excuse, but the last person I was close to abandoned me. I was afraid to let anyone get close to me, but instead of facing my fear, I excused it by telling myself that if I let myself care for you then curses would target you to get to me. So I told myself that it was to protect you instead of acknowledging that I'm selfish coward who was just trying to protect myself-"

"Hold up."

You cut off his rambling, needing a moment to process.

"Are you trying to tell me that you rejected me because you were afraid that in the end I was going to betray you, but you were too emotionally constipated to acknowledge that, so instead you convinced yourself that you were pushing me away for my own protection?"

Downcast he nodded.

"And you're apologizing for that."

"Yes. If I had just protected you by staying by your side, you never would have gotten hurt! The only reason you're in here is because I was too scared to admit that I love you!"

You froze.

"Say it again."

"What."

"What you just said."

Realization dawned on Gojo's face, and his cheeks turned a pretty shade of pink.

"I love you."

He murmured shyly, looking at the comforter.

You leaned forwards and hugged him, burying your head in his chest.

"Again."

You whispered, lips brushing against the fabric of his uniform.

"I love you."

A content smile spread across your face.

"I'm still sorta pissed at you, but you have no idea how happy you just made me."

You said, nuzzling into his shirt.

"I love you too."

He froze in disbelief. There was no way you returned his feelings. He didn't deserve that.

"Do you really forgive me?"

"Mmmm, say it one more time for me."

"I love you."

"Okay I forgive you."

Finally at peace, you basked in the warmth from being in the arms of your soulmate.

Who knew that those three little words were all it took.

Three little words to heal your heart.

Cuddling with soulmate, you knew that you would be okay, as long as he continued to tell you those three little words.

You deep personal reflection was interrupted by Gojo's voice.

"Oh, by the way, Suguru says sorry."

─── ⋅ ∙ ∘ ☽ ༓ ☾ ∘ ⋅ ⋅ ───

#lee's brain asks #jjk x reader #gojo x reader #soulmate au #angst to fluff #mutual pining #lee's 1 year anniversary event #crack ending #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x female reader

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dolene · 20 days

Text

COMPETITIVE GAMES ; yuki tsunoda x reader

summary: how does a casual game night could turn into something more than just a night and it's only because of his competitive nature.

note: yukierre reference because even their gf couldn't top their bromance, AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY YUKI!!

taglist: @seasonswinter @haikyuen @callsignwidow

...★...

pierregasly

liked by yourusername and 110,936 others

pierregasly What a real game starter because I win 😄🥇

view all 322 comments

username Why is it so hard to believe on something like this if it's Pierre who post it?

yukitsunoda0511 Because I'm the one who's actually winning but I let him win

pierregasly Stop spreading lies, you kicked me twice during the race

username how tf is he even be there w him? yesterday he's literally still vlogging in miami

username Yuki is so cute! ^^

username You can even see his impatience on the second slide because he's never been a patient man

yukitsunoda0511 I've been practicing my patience ever since I dated yourusername

yourusername same tbh

yourusername

liked by franciscac.gomes and 61,534 others

yourusername i warn him about this before, and look he's breaking down on the dancefloor 😜

view all 197 comments

username Guys he's break-dancing

franciscac.gomes THERES MURDER ON THE DANCEFLOOOORRRRR 😌🎶

username oh man he really is getting murdered because of those brazilian phonk dances

username Idk but that is so Yuki

username I bet he got an F

username WHY IS HE IN BRAZIL

username Yuki Tsunoda reportedly has fallen during the dance, defeated by his girlfriend

yourusername 😌

yukitsunoda0511 This is just your lucky day, my legs are getting tired

yourusername dances are not your forte, so why are you still picking it tho 🖐️😭

yourusername Proving my real dance skills until my legs are betraying me

pierregasly The best thing he could ever done is to beat me at karaoke

yukitsunoda0511 No I'm not, I beat you in everything in games

username damn i forgot his ego's big as a goddamn boulder

yukitsunoda0511

liked by pierregasly and 102,533 others

yukitsunoda0511 I let her win.

view all 361 comments

yourusername 😄

danielricciardo I thought that you guys was just being there for a day or two...?

username nothing can beat his competitiveness

starwars I see you yoda biggest fan

yukitsunoda0511 I wasn't sure if it's real BUT YES IT'S ME

username Because that's him in the second slide (real)

username what a real thing that he would absolutely do to receive more scores

username short king is finally winning (his second place)

username WHYS HE CLIMBING THE MACHINE LIKE THAT😭😭😭😭

Y/N'S INSTASTORY, A DAY AFTER DEFEATING YUKI

yourusername · 3h

caption: at the end of the day, he's finally defeating me

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0w0tsuki · 7 months

Text

Hey can we stop pretending like the only feasible reason that a trans woman would not like the term femboy is because she's some puritan anti-kinkster or somehow against men being able to dress femininely?

Like perhaps maybe the group of people who had to go through a phase of having to figure out and explore their femininity while being perceived by society as a man DON'T WANT to police the way men are able to present and express their genders? Like maybe WE DON'T want to make things even harder for transfem eggs. Like maybe we might have an interest in protecting transfem eggs and are speaking from the harm that we experienced as eggs ourselves?

Like maybe it might have to do with the fact that outside of Tumblr your average femboy is a trap fetishist? Like did we all forget the memes of "trying to figure out if the Astofolo icon is a trans woman or a fascist?"

Like some of us were discovering our transness during puberty in the early 2000s. You remember the early 2000s right? Where South Park and Family were at the height of their cultural influence, the R slur was a substitute for stupid, and bigotry was so common that "traps are gay" jokes could be made in polite company without having to worry about backlash. So imagine what kink spaces were like. Especially when you're a teenage trans girl just discovering herself.

I personally was so damaged by that experience that I began to believe that my gender-no my EXISTENCE was a fetish to be embarrassed and humiliated by and to be reviled for. I genuinely did not engage in relationships because I believed I was going to have to give in and tell them that they fell in love with a sex object. I did not believe that I was worthy of love. And it took YEARS of working through that for me to be comfortable with transitioning.

And after I worked through that I still have to deal with them. They haven't left kink communities they had their roots in. To this day there's a kink website I frequent that has community suggestions for tags IE: Unless the OP of the work goes back to delete this feature, anyone can "recommend" deletions or additions to the tags of the work. This is in place to make the proper labeling/searching/blacklisting of kinks easier to help curate content. In practice though it allows transmisoginists to basically graffiti any transfem artwork they come across. And let me tell you Femboy tags are getting added on right after they replace F/F with M/M on a transbians t4t work. And it happens so frequently that I have to check in about once a month to these trans tags to inform the most recent victim about what's happened to their works.

And outside of kink spaces I go into fandom spaces where I have had to deal with trap fetishists positioning themselves as fucking lore scholars when they harass trans positive folks about the Correct and Moral gender of the transmisoginistic character that they've got a fap folder dedicated. I got to see someone rise to twitch fame off the back of trap content turn into a “femboy icon” because he gave some of the trap money to trans charities and has a trans girlfriend. Who is still making trap content by the way.I've gotten to see reddit lose their absolute goddamn minds when the term Trap was banned from r/anime, shitting themselves so hard about it that they made their own separate website with transmisogynistic wojaks on the home page and everything. And then I got to see the fucking Bridget Debacle.

The reason I always talk about Bridgets trans confirmation is that it's the most widely recognized recent event where the exact shit I'm talking about was on full display. The reason why her being confirmed as a trans woman was such a big deal for trans girls was not just because she was one of the anime caricatures with her own folder in the trap enthusiasts masterbation portfolio. It was because she was GROUND ZERO for original coining of the word trap. And the EXACT same guys who deemed her a trap were now coming out in DROVES fuck EN MASS. But this time as self appointed femboys. We had so many examples of fucking Astofolo icon twitter facists trying to drudge up any type of left sounding argument using the femboy identity after having their initial arguments revolving around mistranslation were debunked. Crying that transfems were “stealing femboy representation” and trying to say that it was an “antitransmasculization force feminization trope” ironically. You know the cry of “Let men be feminine!!!!” y'all always bring out in defense of femboys. THAT'S who you're parroting! THAT'S who you got it from! We have had direct evidence of former trap fetishists dawning the term femboy when it became less cool to be openly transmisogynistic and then started appropriating leftist language to give their transmisogynistic arguments an air of legitimacy.

Like y'all need to understand that this magical space we got here is a FUCKING BUBBLE. Femboy communities in literally every other online space are former trap/sissy communities and are fucking cess pits of transmisoginy. I have seen posts by people who's only experience being around femboys was on Tumblr go out and check a place like r/mildfemboys to be horrified by the obsessiveness of the transmisogyny the femboys they interact with. And the femboys here aren't much better by treating being forced to acknowledge that these people exist and that is a still very active part of their community even if they don't personally interact with it as a personal attack on them and their gender presentation.

Y'all just want to pretend it doesn't exist and treat the idea that a Transfem might not WANT to interact with YOU(OH GOSH!!) because of it like it's some sort of personal judgement instead of something you're just going to have to accept happens when there's a large portion of people who share that title who are responsible for traumatizing them. But y'all got to go one step further. Y'all who go on about how femboys are our closest allies and about how “femboys and transfems are actually closer than transfems want to admit”. Y'all treat femboys like they're out little fucking brother in the queer community and it's our personal fucking responsibility to leave behind any personal baggage at the door in order to make them feel welcome.

Y'all can't handle the fucking idea that a trans woman might not be comfortable with sharing community with someone who's average member would call her a trap while jacking off to her selfies if he thought he could get away with it. That's she's not interested in playing the Astofolo icon game with them. Y'all gotta create a backwards narratives where she is against her own interests, where she is for making it harder for eggs in the future instead of you know. Asking for better from the communities those eggs are drawn too.

I have been forced to fucking put up with femboys in nearly every online space I've ever been in. And I

Am sick and fucking tired

Of putting up with femboys

#transmisoginy #trans bridget #bridget #trans #femboys #femboy #f1nn5ter #transmisogyny tw #tw trap #trap tw #trap cw #cw trap #tw sissy #sissy tw #cw sissy #sissy cw

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brucewaynehater101 · 16 days

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Hi! I have a writing idea, but I neither have the skill nor the motivation to turn it into a full story, so I thought of sharing it with you because *grips you by the shoulders with tired eyes* you have soooooo many writing ideas, and most of them inspired this brainrot in the first place

It all starts with Tim Drake living the good life. He's married, he has an aquarium full of fish, he's Aquaman's No. 1 Rival in being loved by fishes, and he's a mentor of most Young Heroes of that generation.

He's literally a grandpa (grand-uncle? grunkle?) with a good relationship with his brothers and Bruce, and a loving and spicy relationship with his partners (I can't choose between Kon and Bernard so they're poly)

He dies of old age with no regrets, content with his life and full of hope for the future.

And then he wakes the fuck up.

What. Was. Was none of that real? Did everything good that happened just a dream? A figment of his imagination?

Because not only did he not wake up, he woke up in a pool of his own blood within Titan's Tower. Jason was still there, painting on the wall with the blood that Tim spilled, still wearing that laughingly atrocious costume.

This.

This is bullshit.

Was his life too good that the universe decided "Ha. Fuck you. You need to suffer more, Bitch," and chucked him all the way to the past?

Jason notices him awake, picks up Tim's bō, and prepares to whack Tim.

But Tim barely cares. He's hurting in so many places. He misses his husbands. He just wanted his forever vacation.

He closes his eyes and just waits for the unconsciousness to happen.

It happens, and the next time he wakes up, Nightwing is hovering over him, and Batman is walking away to hunt Red Hood down.

Tim takes in a deep breath. Exhales slowly.

And then, he screams, "GET THE FUCK BACK HERE, YOU GODDAMN FURRY."

Bruce pauses in his walk, Dick is gaping, and Alfred simply blinks at the side.

"YOU GONNA GO SEE JASON? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? SLIT HIS THROAT? YA BETTER STOP WHERE YOU FUCKING ARE BEFORE YOU DECIDE TO CONFRONT HIM, BECAUSE BY DIANA, YOU'RE MESSED UP IN THE FUCKING HEAD, YOU KNOW THAT?"

Dick tries to placate him. "Tim, calm down--"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, DICK! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS FUCKER DID ON MY BIRTHDAY?! ASK ALFRED BECAUSE HE WAS IN ON IT, TOO!"

Tim was panting now. But he didn't care. He remembered heart to hearts with Jason. He remembered how he and Jason had matching neck scars, and how much pain Jason's face was in when he shared what happened between him and Bruce.

"We need to restrain, Bruce. He's going to kill Jason. He's going to put Jason back in the grave if we let him go out."

Everyone pauses, Dick and Alfred's eyes widened in horrified shock. Bruce's face paled.

Tim may have exaggerated a bit, but they don't know that. Because Jason still died. His heart restarts later, but it really doesn't erase what happened.

"I don't kill."

Tim scoffed.

"Just because a man doesn't die at that moment, doesn't mean he won't die later if he's left for dead.

"Jason is going to make you choose between him and the Joker. You're going to save the Joker. And Jason? Because he's no longer how you remember him? He's going to be left with so many injuries caused by you. And you'd want no one helping him, because you don't believe that the Jason that came back is even him anymore. Ergo, an indirect killing, Batman."

Tim glares at Alfred. "I don't fucking care if you're on Bruce's side." Then, he snarls at Dick, "And I don't fucking care if you know Bruce more than I do!"

"I don't give a damn that Jason hunted me down for some twisted revenge or some shit.

"But here's what I do care about: I worked too hard in making sure that the idea of Batman doesn't get tarnished. I'm Robin now. I'm here because I believe you need a Robin. And I'm going to do my fucking job of being your leash if it's the last thing I do!"

Bruce is just fucking standing there.

Tim wants to rip that cowl off.

He already went through sooooo many heartbreaking conversations with Bruce in his old life. Why does he have to go through this again?! Did Jason and Bruce not talk about this with each other in the other timeline?! Does Tim have to bridge their relationship and mediate like he does when Dick comes to visit?

Fuck this life.

Ahhhh, Tim misses his husbands so much, why couldn't they regress back in time with him?

After a few moments, Bruce.

Fucking.

He fucking leaves!

Tim gapes, he glances to Dick with his disbelief clear on his face, and then he grabs a pillow and screams into it.

Fuck. Fuck-fuckity-fuck-fuck.

Tim is soooooo not doing this anymore. He's 16 again, c'mon! He doesn't even feel any of his joint pains (which may be because of the anesthesia, but whatever.)

Tim turns to Dick with a grim expression.

"Call Superman," he says. "And Wonder Woman, and Martian Manhunter. Heck, even call Green Lantern and Flash."

"Why?" he asks.

This motherfucker even had the gall to be confused.

"Because you're the Justice League's eldest child that they raised together as a village," Tim says slowly, as if he's talking to a preschooler. "Let's not give a fuck about the 'no metas in Gotham' rule, and start giving a fuck about all we could accomplish by letting so many adultier adults help us."

Thank Billy Batson Dick nods.

"We're gonna save Jason?"

Tim shrugs, lies down, and tugs his blanket over his whole body. "I don't give a fuck about Jason, Dick."

"Wha--"

"I just care about making sure that Batman doesn't turn into a villain to his own children. He's already fucked up so bad with you, Dick. We gotta make sure he doesn't fuck up any more, especially when Bruce wants to bring Jason home some time later when he stops being an ass."

Tim makes a mental note to make sure that Bruce doesn't get any mind control technology on his hands either.

He hears Dick sigh, slide his chair back, and probably stand up.

"I'll be back," he says softly.

Tim grunts like the true bat-child he is.

Finally, Dick leaves.

Unfortunately, Alfred was still here.

In the previous timeline... Tim never got a heart to heart with Alfred about all the things the man did and didn't do. And he thought he moved on but...

This is the man who gave him the Robin suit first. This is the man who he helped take dishes away from the table every time Dick and Bruce gets onto their violent screaming matches. This is the man who everyone put on the pedestal, but is Tim's equal in everything regarding Bruce's wellbeing.

And it hurt. It hurt so much when only Tim is witness to all of this man's flaws.

°°°°°°°°°°

Aaaaand then I got nothing else to add. I have no idea where I was going with this but here is the culmination of my hatred for Batman, my disenchantment with Alfred, and my need for Tim to scream his heart out because, no. Tim did not die contentedly. He did not actually die a natural death of old age. And the only hope for the future he has is of him meeting up with Kon and Bernard in heaven while everything else on earth can crash and burn for all he cares.

Hello!!!! I'm so glad you shared this and for the compliments. It makes me really happy to see people sharing their AUs. It kind of feels like a community project? People will reblog or do asks for different AUs, so lots of people end up contributing. I love that this is the direction this blog has taken.

As far as what you've shared? Positively beautiful. Fuck Bruce, Tim deserves the chance to scream, and I agree about Alfred. I love that man.... but only some versions of him. What he did to Tim was foul, and his tendency to just stand aside (to not stop Bruce) is horrid. Fuck that bystander shit.

For your time travel AU, I love that he died peacefully and old before being thrown into the hell that was his childhood again. Even worse, it's during Titan's Tower, so he can't change anything that leads up to that. He's thrown smack into the thick of all the drama and bullshit.

Also, rip Tim's relationships in the AU. Unless his husbands got transported back in time with him, he wouldn't be able to fall in love with them. He'd look at their younger selves and see them as the children they are (and the kid he no longer feels like).

To add onto that, he might feel older than Bruce too. If Bruce is 35 ish in this and Tim was like 70, he probably sees Bruce as a grown adult who's also a baby. That man needs to get his shit together, but gods is he so fucking young and stupid.

Special parts I loved:

Fish loving Tim more than Aquaman

Tim going from hard-earned decent relationships with his family to the sewage of his Robin years

The acknowledgement that Tim was Alfred's equal on taking care of Bruce (and how much that betrayal hurt)

Jason actually dying when his throat was cut (that's my hc too)

Tim immediately getting the JL involved

I would so be down with exploring this AU more. Your writing is also fantastic!

#dc comics #tim drake #dc universe #dc au #bruce wayne #thank you for the ask!!!!#jason todd #dick grayson #alfred pennyworth

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silvershiningtarot · 1 year

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❤️❤️Pac18+ Channeled Letter From FS ❤️💋

* take a minute to get into the mood of this reading. These are Five Piles. All channeled Messages from your Spouses. Some of them were irritated but sweet but a lot of them were funny as hell. They made me laugh. But anyway Take what resonates and what doesn't leave the rest alone. Enjoy them. Inhale and Exhale.. 🥲🥲💋

Dear My Love,

Damn, I've been missing you all day today. I'm sorry I haven't got back to you lately. I've just been busy as always. Did you get my message? I hope that you've been working on yourself and not nobody else bullshit. I wanna make up for all those times I've missed with you. Again thank you for being my rock. I know it is your energy. I can feel it. Make sure you're working out, and staying out of trouble. I'm tired of you doubting our connection. We are meant to be. Don't you feel it? I'm coming home soon. I know don't see it yet but at least try to act like I'm there. I know right who tf am I say that that right. I want someone to complain to right now. There's a lot of pain I've been holding onto that I wanna let go. I can't. I can't even cry right now because I have to make sure my family and others are well. Of course, I wanna meet you. You're my wife. I don't know what the future holds for us. But let's not tend to look over there right now. I know I get caught up in the future as well. You are my favorite person in the world to me. I can't say too much it seems like I am supposed to keep quiet about this. But I just wanna say thank you for holding your ground baby. All the negative people don't pay them any mind because, in the end, they won't even matter anymore to us. I know I sound like I'm shitting on myself but I feel like you are so damn perfect I'm just me. Will you be my bride-to-be? Haha 😂🤣 I know I'm rushing. I just wanna get to know you already. Your energy fulfilled me. You and I are made for each other. What can I say? That I love you, my starlight. You shine so much on your own and you don't even know it. I'm giving you so much credit! You should give it to yourself more often. I can see the potential in you. Always look up at the stars and count them I'm right there looking at them too. Rose is red, violets are blue, I wanted to say, baby, forgive you. I know I suck at rhyme but that's all I can think of. 🤣. Anyways thank you for letting me air out my feelings for you and a little bit about my life. Thank you, my dear. Yours truly Best Friend.

SIGH, My cupcake 🧁

My sweet darling cupcake, Where have you been all my life? Just sitting around. May I be completely honest with you? What the fuck happened to you? I mean I've missed you in my dreams. I don't see you anymore. Are you mad at me or something? Tell me what I did wrong so we can fix the issue. Like Tuh, TODAY! I hope you do not purposely ignore me. That shit is unfair. I’m sorry, I didn't mean to come off as a dickhead but you're being a dickhead to me. So what are you talking to someone else? Is there someone else on your mind? That's right I can say I'm irritated by you. But you're so damn lucky I can't stay mad at you it's so hard for me to stay mad at you. I mean look at you. You're my fucking cupcake. You are the most precious person in the world to me. I get overly possessive over you. I'll hunt someone down if they hurt you! Just say the magic word, my love. I'll fucking do it. You look so goddamn beautiful. You are a fucking goddess to me. My everything, my soulmate, my soul family. Yes! I've been dying to say that but I gotta little choke up for a second. But How are you doing? Are you okay? Whenever you're not feeling okay think of us. Think about our house together, marriage, babies, etc. Whatever you can think of us. Do it! I don't like it when you are feeling down it makes me feel down. Thank you for walking beside me, and now it's my turn to walk beside you. It's okay give me your burden. I'll carry them for you. I know I come off as aggressive, and dominant but that's just me being overly protective and worrying about you. You know damn well you would do the same for me too. Anyways I have to go. But I'll talk to you soon. Keep your head up. Don't let anyone disrespect you at all. Keep it pushing, if the people in your life were meant to fall off then fucking let them don't pick them up after they fucking fall. I'm sorry 💔. Let me catch my breath. I love you my sweet cupcake. (excited) I get so excited saying look at me all giggly now hahaha!!! Always keep your head up. My cupcake, you are forever mine never forget that. Please. Make sure to take it easy on yourself why don't you? I like it when you dress up all pretty. I love your body, face, and everything about you. I just wanna kiss your body. All up and down.

Dear My teddy bear 🧸🧸

Ahhh, I wanna fucking scream 🙀right now but I'm cooling down right now. Okay, I'm calm now. I'm just so excited to talk to you. I don't know maybe it's me or it's just your fucking energy getting me all work up. I love when you are excited and work up like I am💋. Always teddy bear. How are you? I've missed you today. It seems like I haven't talked to you all day today. But what's been going on with your life? I hope you having a good day today. Make sure you are smiling too. I love it when you smile, shoo you probably smile right now as I'm talking to you. Can you hear me? Reach out to me. Oh, there's so much I have to say to you. I do. The first thing is. Did you eat today? I hope you did. Get your strength up. Did anyone fuck with you today? Like trouble you. I get it you have your difficulties to face, but I'm still here. I wanna be your knight and shine Amor. I know I sound like a fairytale dream guy or whatever but here's my thing though! Even if I'm so type of fantasy to you. You can pull me out, right? Whatever that stupid saying you die in the dream you die for real obviously not! Haha, but what I'm trying to say is if you are dreaming about me❤️‍🔥 that means I'm real to you. I'm manifesting you come into my life. I may know your face but I felt you before and your energy. It's is always the same I can tell that it's you. If that makes sense. I know I'm a fucking goofy ball! I think it's your energy I told you it's YOU!! HA! I love it though. But my sweet teddy bear! I wanna cuddle next to you. That's right I am a cuddle! Since I'm tall I like to get a cuddle. That's why I call you my teddy bear. You're so soft and warm 🔅. Whenever you're laying in your bed, you are not alone. Like Michael Jackson's song “You are not alone, I'm Here with You. Though far away I'm here to stay🍒. Because you are not alone.” some shit like that. Well, that's the song that came into my head I wanna send that to you. Holy snap! I think that I just put our wedding song Oops yikes my bad. Or you don't mind. ❤️❤️🧸❤️❤️. My gorgeous darling. How can I ever repay you? Not money but I wish I can snap my finger. You can fall into my arms just like that. Haha! Only like a fairytale movie. To be real! I like the villains more than the heroes. Do you ever realize that? Huh? Funny isn't it? They always make the villains describe our reality. Man! That's hilarious, isn't it? But anyways I wanna send you all the kisses! In the world, I hope you can feel them. Love you! I am coming to you in your dream so gear up. Love ya!

My Hero

Oh, my hero girl! I've been missing your touch lately. This red string is meant for you. I can't attach it to someone else. It's not there, to begin with anyway. I know that I've to overthink a lot about things. I got bad supporters, people, and businesses that have just been fucking me over. I'm trying to wrap my head around this what I'm doing wrong. Do I deserve what I think I deserve? I know deserve you but then I don't sometimes. See! Overthinking again. Maybe if you were here then I won't be feeling this way doubting myself and our connection. I feel that we have something together. I mean look at you and look at me. Would date someone like me? Would you be with someone like me? After everything from my past that you heard all over the blogs, social media, and news. Would you? I know I wouldn't. I'm competing with myself. All the time. The more I think about the bad, the more I trap myself. I wanna wake up from this nightmare I've been working on. My hero, I haven't been okay lately. I had fallen sick not like that if you know what I mean just depressed lately. I've been wanting to talk to you but I figure I wasn't strong enough to do it. Well, I'm here now so that counts. I have a mindset of wanting new beginnings for myself. Because I deserve better than this. You understand me, right? Am I talking too much? I don't want to annoy you. Just want someone to talk to and understand me just for once. I isolated myself away from people. Going through a lot of ups and downs with some business stuff. Don't worry my little hero I got this. I thank you for your concern for me. That's one thing that I love about you. Everything about you is so special. We are match-made from heaven. We were to incarnate down here to be together. Maybe it's time for us to finally meet. What do you think? I mean if I'm toxic for you then stay fuck away from me. If I'm in a dark place why the hell would I want my hero involved with that? I would be hurt because these are my demon to face. But anyway. Can I tell you about my dream about us? I saw us on a beach just laying down on the sand holding you while hearing the beautiful breeze of the ocean. I think back at those dreams all the time. Sorry, I can't tell you to rest because I don't want to give the rest out right now. But my little hero is always here to save my day. I can't wait to see what the future holds for us. I think that sometimes I've burned myself out all the time. But I'm working on myself even more. I'm slowly freeing myself. I feel like someone is betraying me I don't even know who it is. Ugh, you're right. I won't pay them any mind at all. I'll try not to. Again thanks for letting me share my side. Now it seems like I've seen you before. Where did I see you? Hmmm did you go to the same school as I did? Or work at the same place before. Your face I can't get out of my head. I can never get rid of your beautiful face of yours. Yes! See!! Haha, I'm smiling 😂🙃😛you brighten up my day. I hope I did the same thing for you my hero. I love you and take care of yourself, please. Muah 💋💋💋💋💋💋💋

My Moonlight

When our fingers touch, my body goes into shock. Can you feel it? I sure can. There's no doubt in my mind that you are the one for me. I think that I've dreamt about you before. I dedicated songs to you before. Yours and mines are the same our soul. Once the two of us get together we are each other’s perfect match. You are the pieces to my puzzles and I am yours. The way you say things got me all twisted. Whenever I see your face I tried to find you again. But then I go back to sleep you're gone. My moonlight where did you go? Why did you disappear on me? I know isn't your fault. But I think that's crazy to say but you and I are Twin Flame or my other half. I love hearing your voice in my head. I daydream about you all the time. You come to like nobody's business! Don't worry I'm not ashamed of you. I tell my friends and people about you, but they all make fun of me like you aren't real. But to me you are real. I had vivid dreams about you. All the time. The way you say my name is so beautiful. Do you sing opera? It is so magnificent. I love it. When our soul combines. They are singing that we are each other’s forever. I never doubt that for a second. I know I got some bad friends, etc. But I don't pay those bitches no mind. Because they ain't my concern. I am! So you are my favorite person. I don't care if people think I'm crazy, or I need help because I talked to myself. Who doesn't talk to themselves? I'm sorry, I went down to an angry place let me breathe this out. Okay, anyways I look at the stars, I wish all the time for you to come into my life. I won't lie my life sometimes fucking boring. Ha 😂 I know you feel the same way too. But I know that I've been working to hard get my financials shit up. So I won't be able to talk to you. But whenever you're looking at the moon, you'll find me staring back at it. Because when the moon shines on your eyes that's my eyes glimpsing back at you. I know you can't feel me physically but feel me emotionally, and spiritually. We have a spiritual connection between you and me. I know you can feel and so can I. It may not be what you want all the time but it is worth the risk. I don't think you know how much you mean to me. You mean everything to me. I'm so proud of the work you've been doing for yourself. Let me give you around applause 👏🏾👏🏾 that's how much I'm proud of you. Thank you for being that much amazing to yourself. Don't feed into that anger. Whenever you are feeling angry or a negative thought came to mind burst that fucking ego. Shout it out if you have to. Shit call me and we’ll do it together. We are a partner no matter what. I know I come off as this softy but I don't care. I don't want anybody else touching you, or talking to you. I know sound possessive. I don't care I care about you so much. I can be a real fucking dickhead if I want to be but I choose not to be. Make sure you meditate and always remember what I said SELF-Control is important! Man, I gotta start making up homework for your ass! 🤣🤣😂 Anyways my other half I know you mean well. But I just wanna tell you!! You are my favorite person in the world. The Universe already blessed me enough with your light and energy. I'm just ready to enjoy it in person. How amazing you are. Thank you for choosing me. I'm glad you're my other half. Doesn't matter if we are soulmates, twin flames, or whatever. You still are my MOONLIGHT!! Forever & always. Promise me that you'll take good care of yourself. No matter what. Don't be surrounded yourself by toxic people, or energies if they try to block them. Like I said call me I’ll help you push them out of the way. I love you my darling, you already know. 🧸💋💋❤️🧸

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just-a-sewer-goblin · 3 months

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Simon Flinches

Simon x gn!reader

Finally did it! And I looked at it so much that I hate it now, even went back in and changed some small words and stuff, but here you go. Take the flinching trope and make it Simon instead of reader flinching.

Warnings: panic attack, hurt/comfort, barely proofread because I'm too tired, reader being called "Sir" as a honorific not referring to the gender

Wordcount ~3k

You'd say you've gotten good at navigating the minefield that is Simon. You've been together a while by now and you've learned how to handle him so he feels safe and can be himself. It's been a long process that's far from over but you wouldn't have it any other way. Simon is worth all the time, all the effort. And if it means losing a limb in the process, crossing that minefield to get closer to him is worth it.

Simon would say he's gotten good at defusing the ticking bomb that he is. He's been with you for a bit now and he's learned how to trust you more, how to be vulnerable with you. His walls are lower than they’ve ever been and it has actually lead to good things.

But sometimes things don’t go as you want. No matter how hard you try, how carefully you try to navigate Simon. Sometimes just a tiny thing, a gesture, a word, makes everything explode, traps you in that minefield without knowing where to put your foot next, how to reach out to him without stepping onto another scar, tearing it open in a violent explosion.

Like now. It’s so goddamn stupid you could kick yourself. You've been arguing about whose turn it was to choose the movie. Something so insignificant, so trivial. But it's been a long day for both of you and what started as a joking argument has turned into an actual one and now you don't know how to stop it. Your voices are raised, you’re both shouting the frustrations of the day at each other. You hate arguing with Simon, just as he hates arguing with you.

You know it’s a normal part of any relationship, but with Simon it scares you. With Simon you never know when it could turn into him leaving. Into him pulling away. Yet you find yourself unable to stop your frustration from dripping from your tongue like venom. Simon’s not doing any better.

"Your movie choices are questionable anyway!", Simon throws into your face. "I suffer through them just for you. But they're horrible really! They all suck. I want to watch something that actually entertains me!"

Okay, that stung. Just a few days ago you'd shared one of you favorite movies with him. A movie that changed something in you when you first watched it, a movie that slightly tilted your world view. You didn't expect him to like it but that stung. And in your mind his sentence turns into you not being entertaining enough.

So you step forward, trying to hold back tears. "Yeah, as if your", you jab your finger at his chest, Simon flinches back "movie choices -"

You freeze. He'd taken a step back, raising his hands to shield himself and your heart drops, shattering at your feet. His big eyes are watching your next move in apprehension.

It should be ridiculous, really, someone as capable as Simon, a trained soldier, flinching over you putting your finger on his chest. As if you could actually inflict harm on him. As if you wouldn't rather die than hurt him.

But it's not ridiculous. It's a fucking fist to the face.

The sudden quiet makes your ears ring and Simon doesn't seem to be any better. His chest is heaving. His arms are still up, shoulders hunched, his entire stance small and scared. He’s ready to block your blows, ready to deal with you finally putting your hands on him.

His breathing is loud and quick and you want to guide him to calmness but you don’t know how when you caused his distress in the first place. This is new territory. A new step you took that landed you directly over a mine and it’s exploding right now. Exploding in slow motion, letting you see the details of everything you’ve built with Simon shattering and crumbling into dust.

Then his entire demeanor changes and you almost get whiplash. In a flash he’s squared his feet, narrowed his eyes and dropped his shoulders. His hands have gone down but they’re fists at his sides and there’s nothing relaxed about his new stance. You just watched every wall he’s let down for you come back up in the matter of a second.

His cold gaze almost hurts, his eyes distant and calculating, trying to guess your next move. Like a shield of ice that slipped into place before his soul, keeping it hidden from you.

"Simon -" It's whispered. A plea.

He takes a deep breath, rolling his shoulders and then starts walking towards you with purpose. For an irrational second you think he’s going to hit you for scaring him. You think he’s going to get revenge on you for everything that’s ever been done to him.

The next second you’re ashamed for even thinking that. He’s not going for you. No, it’s worse. He’s going for the door of the living room behind you.

You’re helplessly watching, your tongue stuck to the roof of your mouth, throat dry, almost painful. Your heart is hammering so hard it feels like it’s trying break your ribs from the inside. Trying to break free so it can follow Simon.

You’re frozen as you watch him leave the room. Every single muscle in his body is coiled tight, ready to whip around and stop any threat. Stop you should you so much as breathe too hard.

Holding your breath, tears gather in your eyes, dripping wetly down your cheeks. This is it, you’re waiting for the telltale sound of the door to the apartment opening and closing, Simon walking out of your life because this is irreparable.

The relieve you feel when you hear the bedroom door instead almost brings you to your knees. Then you hear the lock to the room turn and your heart breaks all over again. He’s locked you out of his safe space.

Fuck.

You sink down onto the floor and start crying in earnest. You never wanted to scare him. Never wanted to provoke that reaction. You had only pointed your finger!

You’re not even sure if you’re crying over what you’d just done or if your tears are for Simon, how he must be feeling right now. The one person he’s let in raising their hand at him, making him feel unsafe.

He’d thought you’d hit him. He’d thought you’d put your hands on him in a harmful way.

The pain coursing through you makes you breathless as you cry for Simon and everything he’s endured, as you cry over what you’d just ruined.

Hopefully he can’t hear you from the bedroom. You don’t want to cry over this, it’s not your place to cry when Simon is the one hurting. But you’re so scared of losing him of losing your best friend of losing your forever that you can’t help it.

In a weird twisted, crooked way his reaction is prove of how much he trusts you. Trusted you. He’d trusted you enough to let his guard down so far that a gesture of yours caught him off guard. You’ve never seen him so surprised by something someone did, his eyes always all over everyone. He’s always so aware of everyone and everything.

The fact that he felt safe enough to even be caught off guard shows just how close he’d let you. It was a privilege, a gift. A fragile little thing with broken wings in your palms and now you’ve crushed it.

You try to calm your breathing more. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Deep, slow. The way you instruct Simon to breathe when he’s battling his demons.

Demons he might be battling right now. And suddenly your tears run dry and you jump to your feet. This really isn’t the time to feel sorry for yourself. So you get a slippery grip on your emotions and push them back for a later time.

Rushing to the bedroom, you raise your hand and pause. You can hear Simon’s steps in the room; he’s walking in circles like a caged animal. You’ll be damned if you don’t at least try to help, doesn’t matter if this is your fault in the first place.

You knock.

His steps halt.

And then they approach the door, soft thuds drawing closer, you can see the door handle turn but it doesn’t open. And then he’s frantically shaking it, apparently not remembering locking it.

“It’s locked!” His voice sounds so confused and scared that your chest feels like it’s caving in.

“You locked it, baby. You can unlock it. The key is on your side.”, you try to say in a calm soothing tone but you’re pretty sure your voice is shaking.

The turning of the key is frantic and the door gets ripped open and then you’re face to face with Simon and his eyes are wide, flitting all over the room, disoriented. His chest is still heaving, even worse than before, and when you see him shaking, you know there’s no stopping it.

Simon’s eyes lock on you and he doubles over, his hands clawing at his chest and neck, he's breathing too hard, always in until his chest must feel like it’s exploding.

“Can’t… breathe…”, he chokes out, eyes utterly terrified, tears starting to drip as he’s frantically trying to breathe and not drown in his feelings.

You don’t know if this is a ‘touch helps’ kind of panic attack or a ‘don’t you dare touch me’ panic attack and you’re scanning over him trying to guess, when his hand grips your shoulder in an iron grip and his wide eyes look straight through you.

He’s still hyperventilating and your heart seems hell bent on matching his hectic panting. Grabbing his arms, you try to steady him as he goes down, his knees buckling. He’s heavy in your hold and your muscles scream but you put your all into preventing him from falling and hurting himself in the process. At least you manage to slow his fall and then he’s on the floor on his hands and knees. One of his hands tries to dig his fingers into the floor as the other fists his shirt, damn near ripping it.

You have to do something even if you don’t know if it’ll help or make things worse. There's no forgiving yourself if you don’t at least try, even if it’s fishing in the dark. If it doesn’t work, you can change the approach. But doing nothing won’t help anyway. So you wrap your arms around him. “I’m going to lay you down, baby. I’m going to hold you.”

You don’t think he hears you but maneuvering him without telling him feels wrong anyway. And then you do exactly as you said, you tug Simon with all your strength towards you and he topples over onto his side, landing on top of you instead of the floor and you’re glad you’re there to soften his fall. Even if you’re pretty sure you’ll have bruises from it.

Immediately you wriggle partially out from under him, keeping him on your thighs, in your lap and you wrap your arms around him.

“I’ve got you, Simon. I’m here. You’re in our apartment. Everything is okay. You’re safe, baby.”

Tears silently start dripping fdown your face again, when he curls in on himself clawing at the floor and you know he will black out if he doesn’t get his breaths more even.

In a desperate attempt you put your hand over his chest and push. “Simon, breathe out, baby, come on. Out.”

You exhale in an exaggerated way next to his ear and you think you hear him exhaling the tiniest bit, before he’s sucking air in in in. But that’s something. He can hear you, he reacts, which means he’s allowing you to guide him.

You press again. “Good, again. Ouuuuuut.”, you exhale and this time he manages to get a bit more air out. The way your top is sticking to you with sweat makes you shiver but you don’t give any attention to your own body being stressed. It will calm down when Simon does.

You continue. You don’t know how long you talk to him like that, reassurances between commands to breathe. It’s probably only been a few minutes, but you’re exhausted like you’ve been going for hours, fighting for every exhale until finally his breathing is back to a rhythm that’s as close to normal as it can get in this moment.

The exhaustion rolls over you as if you’ve had the attack yourself and your body curls over him, resting your head on him as he shakes in your lap and breathes.

The thumping of his heart under your cheek is still way too quick and he’s shaking like a fucking leaf, so you drag your tired body out from under him and turn him onto his back. Goddamnit he’s heavy.

Looking at his face resupplies your tears. His cheeks are wet, he’s pale as a sheet and his arms are clutched tightly to him as he continues shaking. You know he’s somewhat aware of his surroundings again but he’s still victim to his mind and body.

Remembering what he’s asked for before in moments when he’s needed grounding, you crawl over him and lay down with your full weight. Your head rests on his chest, near his shoulders and his arms, curled over his chest, dig into your own uncomfortably but that doesn’t matter right now.

Your own body shakes with his as you raise your hands, gently lifting his head - after a silent “please” because he resisted for a moment until his eyes focused on you - and pull a rug closer so he can rest his head on that instead of the hard floor.

Your entire body sags with relief when he pulls his arms out from under you and wraps them around you instead. His hold is tight as if he’s trying to make your bodies merge into one. As if he’s trying to push you into his ribcage to keep your right next to his heart.

His heartbeat slowly returns to normal under you and yours follows his lead. When he lifts his head and presses a kiss to your forehead, you curl your fist tighter into his shirt and finally try to push yourself off of him. The slight tightening of his hold on you makes you settle again.

The broad palms of his hands are warm and soothing as they pass back and forth over your back. You press your lips to his chest through his shirt and his next exhale is long and shaky.

He moves, jostling you slightly, and you try to get up again, but he doesn’t let you. His voice is low and tired as he says: “Hold on, lovie.”

You do and he sits up, maneuvering you in his arms until he’s got one arm around your back and one under your knees. Then he stands up and even though his movements are slow and exhausted the little to no effort with which he handles your weight still steals your breath.

His heavy steps take you both back into your bedroom and he puts you down on your shared bed, crawling in with you immediately.

You turn onto your side, as does he and then you’re looking at each other, the exhaustion on his face making you feel your own all the more.

Simon moves his hand, covers one of yours and squeezes twice. Immediately you return the gesture. A small sleepy smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. The reassurance behind that gesture making both of you melt into the mattress.

Still there’s so much talking to do and you end up whispering “We need to talk about this, Si.” into the small space between you, where your joined hands lie.

He brings your hand up to his lips and presses a kiss to each of your fingers, before letting it fall back onto the covers, still in his hold. His eyes are exhausted but you know you can’t sleep without having discussed what happened.

“I need you to know, Si”, you swallow against the tightness in your throat “I would never, ever hurt you. I’d rather chop off my own hand than touch you in a way that could cause you harm. I’m so sorry, Simon, I-“

“I know.”

You shut up, big eyes on his and he smiles, kissing the back of your hand this time.

“I know.”, he repeats and practically watches the gears in your head turn. So he takes a deep gulp of air and continues. “It’s not you, ‘luv. It’s the fucking past. Not your fault that a damn finger is all it took today to set me off. It’s my brain being a fucker.”

You’re so relieved you could cry again. He didn’t think you’d hurt him. His brain just didn’t make the distinction between the finger belonging to you or someone else at that moment. In that moment it was only a hand raised against him.

Still, maybe there’s a way to prevent that in the future? So you tentatively ask: “What can I do so you feel comfortable trusting me more? So you don’t feel like you’re endangered by a gesture from me?”

“I trust you.”, he states calmly and you shake your head.

“There has to be something I can do better. So it’s easier for you to trust-“ The way Simon takes your joined hands and brings them up to his throat, abruptly shuts you up. He's pressing your palm against it so it would be easy to squeeze and hurt and – you try to pull it back and he forces your hand harder against his throat with his own. You freeze completely.

“I trust you.”

Your eyes widen and fly to his from where they’d been locked onto his throat and the way your hand is curled against it in a chokehold.

His eyebrows are drawn together and his eyes fixated on you, willing you to understand. The soft caress of his thumb on the back of your hand - a hand that could cut off his oxygen if you wanted - makes your heart squeeze painfully in your chest.

“Okay.”, you whisper and he finally drops his hand, allows you to slowly draw your hand back from his throat. Your eyes are still widened and lock onto his neck again. Leaning forward you press a kiss to the delicate skin over his Adam’s apple and feel him swallow heavily under your lips.

When you look at hom again his eyebrows are still furrowed and warm palm finds your cheek. “I’m sorry, I reacted like that to something so small.”

You shake your head and nuzzle into his hold, giving a little kiss to his thumb. There's desperation in his eyes and you whish you could kiss it away.

“I’m sorry, ‘m all kinds of fucked up, ‘luv. Wouldn’t fault you if it’s too much. If you want to –“ Your hand covers his mouth and his eyes betray the surprise at that gesture.

“Don’t you dare, Si. Don’t you dare even say that. As if I’d want that. You shouldn’t even think that. The only reason why I mind the panic attacks is because I know how heavily they weigh on you. You can flinch, you can scream, you can break, I don’t mind. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t enjoy seeing you hurt, if I could I’d make it stop, but I’ll take that as long as I have you in my arms at the end of the day.”

His hand gently draws your hand away from his mouth and he whispers: “But I’m a handful, lovie. How can you not mind the hassle?”

You smile at him, a little mischievously. “Good thing that I’ve got two hands then, baby.”

He snorts, while his entire face softens, and draws you in closer, you're pressed into his chest, his arms around you and he showers your head with kiss after kiss.

“I thought you were going to leave me.”, comes your muffled voice abruptly halting all of Simon's movement. Gently he pushes you away a bit so you can see his sincerity when he answers.

“Never. As long as you’ll have me.”

Your eyes water and he tilts your head up, with the tip of his finger under your chin, and presses the softest of kisses to your lips. “Don’t care about the flinches and panic attacks and hard moments as long as I get to be in your arms at the end of the day.”

You laugh, when he uses your words against you, a cracked, teary laugh and kiss him again.

“Fuck I need a nap.”, he groans once you’ve managed to stop spelling your love against the lips of each other. You giggle.

“We both do, but drink something first. You’ll wake up with a headache if you don’t.”, you say and he groans with the effort of rolling over and drinking out of the bottle on his nightstand.

He doesn’t know what he did to deserve you, what he did to find someone so caring. Who looks at his hard exterior and handles it with soft touches and patience. He doesn’t know what he did right in his life, because he for sure can’t remember ever doing anything right, to find someone like you. He’s not going to let you go and if he has to beg at some point, then he’ll strangle his pride with his own two hands and do so.

When he faces you again he grins. “Mission accomplished, Sir.”

You groan and hide your face in your hands, missing Simon’s soft expression at your flustered state. God you’re so cute. Especially when you’re voice comes out all embarrassed when you say: “You can’t say that! You know what it does to me when you call me that!”

He wraps his arms around you again, pulling you close, your bodies fit to each other, immediately finding comfort in each other. And he can feel a wave of calmness crash over him, making him sleepy and slow. “Ya can do something ‘bout that when we wake up. Don’t think my soldier’s up to doing any long marches right now.”

He’s expecting it when your hand wriggles free and slaps his shoulder. “Simon!” You can feel his upper body shake with silent laughter.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Si.”

Your eyes are heavy, your muscles finally relaxing after all that tension of earlier. Your bodies melt into each other. You can feel Simon’s breathing getting slower, a telltale sign of him falling asleep.

“I love you.”, you mumble again before sleep takes you.

Simon’s too far gone to reply but you feel the two squeezes of his hand on you, pressing his love directly into your skin.

#the sewer writes #simon ghost riley x reader #simon x reader #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #hurt and comfort #simon x gn!reader #simon riley x gn! reader #gn! reader #hurt/comfort #panic attack #mentions of being hurt in the past #cod simon #cod ghost x reader #cod simon riley x reader

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justmeinadaze · 10 months

Text

I Have Nothing (If I Don't Have You) Part 5 (Steddie X You)

A/N: I bare you a gift :)

Warning: Security Guards/ Soft Dom Steddie X Singer Sub (slightly bratty) Fem Reader, SMUT, spanking, slightly rough, pretty much just the norm :), FLUFF and ANGST! Reader is trying to do better with her vices but gets so overwhelmed she disappears abruptly and the boys need to find her, the three of them do go into details with their trauma especially the reader. My own personal trauma (like with most of my fics) leaked through a bit i.e. feeling like I'm not enough. I think that's about it.

Word count: 6862

“How are you feeling today, Y/N?”

“Annoyed.”

“Because…”

“Because I want a fucking drink. I should at least be able to have that! Do you know how hard it is for me to not have BOTH the things that made me feel better when I was fucking depressed.”

You had been on the tour now for two weeks and you were exhausted. You love singing for your fans, you really did, but after your breakup and cutting out your vices…you felt like you were drowning. Talking to Daniel helped a bit but he was getting to that part of therapy where you needed (his words, not yours) to talk about the personal things in your past that led you to drink and drugs.

You just couldn’t get there. It was like you kept running into a wall, the wall that you built to protect yourself. Even when you tried to open your mouth to talk about your family or relationships, nothing came out. Your brain froze like mental stage fright and it just made you angry.

“No, I understand, Y/N. Trust me. I’ve been where you are before. I know it’s hard.” You scoff at his response as you fold your arms across your chest. “What you don’t seem to realize is those things, drugs and alcohol… didn’t actually make you feel better. You need to find something that does and focus your energy there.”

***

“Y/N! Jesus Christ, stop! Everyone stop! What the fuck is going on!?”, Mark shouts at you as he comes out on to the stage.

“I’m fucking tired! Can we take a goddamn break?”

“Not until we get this right! Your show is in two days!”

“Get off my back, Mark! I’m doing my best!”

It took all of Eddie’s energy to not get up and defend you. To an outsider looking in, they would think you were being a brat but this asshole was pushing you and they both knew that. Unfortunately, there was nothing they could do. They were your security and their job was to protect you. Mark wasn’t physically hurting you…all they could do was grit their teeth and watch as you slowly fell apart.

“Fuck this! I’m taking a 10. If you have a problem with it, call Jack.” The boys quickly got up to follow you as you headed outside and sat on the emergency stairs just near the back door. “Fuck off.”, you growled when you heard Steve sigh.

“You’re right, you know. You need a break.”

Their eyes scanned you over as your leg jumped anxiously. “Y/N, everything is going to be ok.” Eddie was trying to comfort you and you understood that but it wasn’t enough. You were spiraling. “Sweetheart, look at me.” He commanded as he descended to his knees in front of you. “I promise you. You’re safe, okay?”

“Eddie…I’m so tired.”

“I know, baby.”, he whispers.

Steve comes to sit beside you, pulling you closer to his side as you fold into yourself and begin to cry.

***

The following morning when you aren’t in bed, they assumed Mark pulled you away again without notifying them but as they hurry down to the auditorium, they notice the man pacing back and forth.

“Where is she?!”, he shouts when he notices them.

“She’s not here?”, Steve asks and Eddie immediately turns way to check his phone for your tracker.

“No! No, she’s not here! I’m fucking sick and tired of her diva attitude. Fuck her!”

“HEY! She’s the reason you have this job. Now show some fucking respect!” Steve shouts before turning to his friend. “Did you find her?”

“I think this might be broken, Harrington. It says she’s in the Atlantic.”

“Fuck me. She got on a plane. Come on.” The man tugs his arm as they run to the hotel room to hastily grab their things. As they pack, he dials your publicist’s phone number. “Sarah! Y/Ns on a plane right now. We think she’s headed to Europe. Do you know where she might go over there?”

“Fucking hell! I thought she was doing better.”

“She was…is…she’s burned out. She… she wasn’t ready for this tour.”

“That doesn’t surprise me. Jack and them are always pushing her. Um…she used to talk a lot about this hotel in France. Her and her family stayed over there once when she was little.”

“My family went on vacation there when I was a kid. It was the happiest I remember us ever being. I go there sometimes when I want to be left alone. I feel safe there.”

“I know where she’s going. Thanks Sarah. I’ll keep you posted.”

###########

“I swear, sir. There is no one by that name here.”, the concierge at the front desk sighs as Steve glances towards the metalhead again.

Eddie flashes him his phone. “It says she’s here. I’m surprised she hasn’t ditched it like she did in Vegas.”

The other man’s eyes widen as a sudden thought hits him. “That’s because she wants us to find her. Um, excuse me. Is there anyone by the name of Munson or Harrington listed?”

“Actually, yes. First name Munson, last name Harrington checked into her room yesterday evening. “

***

They quietly opened the door with the key front desk gave them as Steve scanned the room. Nothing seemed out of place except for the bottles of wine and vodka spaced out on the coffee table in the tiny hotel room. This wasn’t like the usual places you stayed in.

It was much smaller with only one bedroom and living room that doubled as a kitchen. The back balcony doors were open wide and Eddie noticed a figure sitting on one of the chairs outside. They cautiously headed that way, finding you with your knees under your chin as you smoked a cigarette. Your eyes were bloodshot from tears and lack of sleep. Your hair that was usually styled in some way was haphazardly slung into a messy style bun as loose strands fell against your bare shoulders.

It was relatively warm but there was a cool breeze that allowed you to be outside with your spaghetti strap shirt and pajama pants without feeling uncomfortable.

You made no movement to acknowledge them as they placed themselves in front of you, leaning against the concrete wall of the patio. Eddie casually lit his own cigarette, offering Steve one who declined.

“My parents were so excited…when we were able to afford a vacation out of the country.”, you stated in a gravelly, rough voice that tugged at their hearts as you continued to stare down at their feet. “My mom always wanted to go to Paris. ‘It’s the city of love!’.”, you smile as you mimic her enthusiasm.

“My dad got us the tickets and I remember seeing the city as we flew over…I thought it was magic.”, you giggle but a tear fell down your cheek. “We went everywhere. I mean we literally saw every touristy thing you could think of. But…what I remember most is…that first night, we stayed in this hotel. My dad ordered us food and we all curled up in the bed to watch some black and white French romance film. A song started to play and I recognized it so I started to sing along but in English.”

“My father smiled and yanked my mother off the bed so they could dance as I sang. I knew then…that’s what I wanted to do with my life. I wanted to sing and make people happy like that. I think that was the one and only time they approved of my wanted profession.” Your eyes shifted towards theirs as you tried to smile. “I’m sorry. I-I-I…”

Steve shook his head and bent down to take you into his arms which you eagerly accepted, wrapping your own around his neck and legs around his waist as he carried you back inside with Eddie close behind. He sat on the couch, petting your head as they allowed you to cry.

The metalhead inspected the unopened bottles of liquor before quietly looking around the little hotel room for any more of your vices, signaling to Steve that he found nothing. After awhile the tears stopped but you didn’t want to let him go. He felt your fingers run through his hair behind his head absently as you nuzzled your nose into his neck.

“It’s ok, baby girl. You’re safe. It’s alright.”, he cooed. “Do you think you can move to Eddie’s lap so I can make some phone calls. Let people know you’re safe.” Your head hung as you pulled back and climbed over to the other boy as you pouted. “Hey…you trust me, right?”

“They’re going to be so angry with me.”, you whispered in a small voice.

Steve placed his fingers under your chin and lifted your eyes to face him. “Do you trust me?”

“With my life.”

They both smile at your answer as he rises from the sofa. Leaning your forehead into the nook of Eddie’s neck and shoulder, you gently run your palm along his chest. It wasn’t sexual and he understood that. Any other person may think you were trying to flirt or making a move but he knew. This was your way of grounding yourself; making sure they were still there in the moment with you.

You had fallen into a little girl mind set but it wasn’t for pleasure. It was self-preservation. They knew how to identify which was which and were happy to take care of you in either instance.

“Eddie?”

“Hm?”

“Are you mad at me?”

“No, sweetheart. I’m not mad at you. I’m worried about you; we both are.”

Your gaze shifts to Steve who was now pacing in the bedroom with the phone to his ear.

“Yeah, we found her…No, Jack, she’s not alright. You guys are pushing her too hard. She’s exhausted… First off, don’t cuss at me. We just spent all night trying to get to her and I’m not in the mood. This wouldn’t have happened if you and Mark would listen to her. She’s a person, not a cash machine… Fine. Fire us, but we’re still not going to drag her back. Not until some changes are made and she takes a break.”

“I’m not going to let him fire you.”, you murmur.

“Hey, don’t worry about that right now, okay? Is it alright if I ask you some questions?” You nod as he holds you tighter to his body. “Why did you place all these bottles on the table?”

“I…I wanted some. I really did but I couldn’t. I took them out t-t-to see them. I needed to see all of them.”

“Why, sweetheart?”

“Because…I used to drink all this…in one night. I-I-I thought maybe if I saw it front of me, it would help…stop me. Daniel said I should focus my energy on something else so…when I look at the bottles, I think of something else.”

“What do you think about?”

“You two.”

His soft brown eyes met yours and he knew instantly you were telling the truth.

“Hello, front desk? Yes, for the Munson Harrington room, can you make sure no one disturbs us besides faculty. We don’t want any phone calls or unexpected visitors…Yes, sir. If anyone other than myself or my friend Mr. Munson asks don’t tell anyone we are here…thank you.”

“He’s assuming if he won’t tell them where you are then they will start hunting for us and since our names are on the room, they could ask which one. This way now if they do, the front desk won’t give them anything.”, Eddie explains. “Baby, I see the bottles but I have to ask, have you hidden any drugs for later or anything like that?”

“No, sir. I promise. Do…do you need to look at my eyes?”

The fact that you were being so open with him was slightly jarring but, again, he understood. They made you feel safe and you wanted to continue making them feel like they could trust you as much as you trusted them.

“No, sweetheart. I trust you. Would it be alright with you if I got up to move these bottles so you don’t have to keep looking at them?” You nod but as he adjusts you so he can stand you continue to cling to his shirt. “Alright, hey, it’s ok. Follow me.”

He takes your hand and pulls you towards the bedroom, playfully twirling you into Steve’s side who silently grins as he dips you before tugging you back up with one arm. Eddie fades away into the background as you hold the other boy to you.

“Ok, I think that’s everyone and Sarah said she would release a statement for you regarding the shows this week. She said if you need more time just let her know.”

“I like Sarah.”

“Me to.”, Steve grins down at you sweetly. “Have you eaten anything today?”

When you shake your head, he nods before lifting you into his arms, carrying you to the kitchen, and setting you down on the countertop.

“You know, I’m looking through this cabinet like I can read any of the French here.”

His tone makes you giggle as you point to a piece of paper beside him.

“That’s the menu for the hotel. They have some really delicious French toast.”

“Yeah? Let’s try it.”

After you three ate, everyone crashed. When you arrived at the hotel, you had been so anxious you couldn’t lie still long enough to get any kind of sleep. The guys had immediately hopped a plane when they had an idea of where you were and were so concerned about your wellbeing, they hadn’t slept either.

When you finally woke up, you felt so much better and less heavy with your worries. It was dark outside but the lights illuminated the city as people walked around the Paris streets. Both men were still knocked out beside you so you snuck into the living area with an idea as you began situating the space.

##########

“Eddie. Steve.”, you whispered as you gently shook their arms.

“Huh? Wha? What’s wrong, honey?”

“Nothing’s wrong. I just wanted to show you something. I also ordered some lunch/dinner for us since it is a little after nine.”

Your breathy chuckle and calmer tone cause them to open their eyes fully as they drink you. Physically you did look a lot better. You had changed into a new set of pajamas and your hair was now down around your shoulders. Your energy as a whole seemed much less erratic than when they had first walked in and that made them both extremely happy.

They rolled out of bed, reaching for some sweats to be more comfortable before following you out of the room. Their mouths fell open at the sight in front of them as you opened your arms in a grand gesture. You had taken some of the couch cushions and pillows, creating a makeshift fort with extra sheets thrown over to finish the design. The little tv the hotel room came with was pushed in front of it with food and drinks on the nearby table.

“Y/N, what--”

“I thought it might be fun. The guide on the tv says their also about to play a movie I really like.” You shift your weight from one foot to the other as you look towards the floor. “I wanted to do something for you…to say thank you for coming all this way. It’s not enough, I know, for all the trouble I caused but…it’s all I could think of in the moment…especially since this means a lot to me…like you two and what you just did for me.”

Steve’s hand reached out and brought your lips to his, letting you go so Eddie could do the same.

“What’s the movie called?”

“Amélie. I love it. It’s about a woman who tries to help people find their happiness while also finding love.” You grin like giddy schoolgirl making them smile with you.

You three devour the food concierge brought up as the movie played. They were completely entranced by it and occasionally mimicked the young actresses French as they tried remembering words for later. For a couple of hours, you forgot you were a famous singer and they were your security. You forgot that just a few hours ago you were falling apart and one bad decision away from opening the wine in the hotel.

For a couple of hours, you were a tourist in a hotel room with two men you really cared about and seemed to genuinely care about you.

“That was amazing. How have I never heard of this movie before?”

“Because you have never heard of most movies, Steven.”, Eddie laughs. His eyes shift over your frame essentially checking in and reading your body language. “May I ask you something, sweetheart? What was the song you sang when your parents danced?”

You softly smile as you get to your feet and run in the bedroom to get your phone. Ella Fitzgerald’s beautiful, soulful voice flows through your speakers as you place it on the couch and reach for Eddie’s hand.

“Let's fall in love Why shouldn't we fall in love? Our hearts are made of it Let's take a chance Why be afraid of it?”

Placing your palms on his bare shoulders, you both danced to the music.

“My mother loved music like this. She actually wasn’t a big fan of TV so anytime my father was out she would turn it off and play her records.”, you giggled. “God, and Ella always had the most gorgeous voice.”

“She really does. I feel like I should be wearing a shirt.” He smiles when you laugh harder, pulling him closer to you as you rest your chin near his head.

“I remember once she played her album while she was cooking, waiting for my dad to come home while I sat on the counter and watched her move. She was swaying while she was singing and I thought she looked so beautiful… then she turned around with this big smile and said ‘Now see, that woman is a singer. You’ll never be as good as her I’m afraid, baby.’”

You heard Steve rise from the floor and you detached from Eddie to dance with him.

“Let's close our eyes And make our own paradise Little we know of it Still we can try to make a go of it.”

“It wasn’t just with music…that was just my biggest disappointment to them. When I was growing up, I was too fat or too thin, not dressed right, or I didn’t speak properly. They always acted like I embarrassed them. The first time I was arrested was actually when I was 16. I got caught at a party drinking with bunch of other kids. My dad hit me and said I was stupid. That I may as well become a whore because there was no way I was getting into college now. I didn’t have the heart to tell him I never wanted to go anyway.”, you chuckled but Steve just held you closer to his chest.

“We might have been meant for each other To be or not to be, let our hearts discover.”

“I can’t do this. It’s too hard.”, you whisper as you push away from him and try to head for the bedroom.

“Hey, hey, hey.” Eddie quickly grips your wrist. “Don’t run from it, Y/N. You’re doing really good. Just…let go.”

“Let me go, Ed.”

“Fuck them.” Your head turned to look at Steve. “Y/N, fuck them. If they can’t see how amazing and talented you are then fuck them.”

“You…you don’t understand.”

“Oh? Not being good enough for your parents. Your right I would have no idea what that’s like. My dad still calls me 24/7 commanding I come home to give up this ‘childish job’ and run is obnoxiously boring and bland as fuck company. When I was in high school, he always wanted me to be MVP and a straight A student but freshman year when I figured out that didn’t matter I just coasted by. Little did I know that would just make him worse. After I graduated, I said fuck them. I’ll do what makes me happy. My dad still thinks he can change my mind but…”, Steve shrugs.

“I wasn’t good enough for my father either. So much so he left me with my uncle and ended up in jail. Supposedly, he complains about me in there. I’m a ‘pansy fucking pig’ now or some bullshit. I’ve explained a thousand times I’m not a cop but it doesn’t matter.”

“You still talk to him?”

“Sometimes…”, Eddie sighs. “Not as much as I used to.”

“Where’s your mom?”

The metalhead crosses his arms over his chest as he shifts his gaze to the floor. “She, uh, she died a long time ago.”

“What about you?”, you ask as you focus your line of questioning on Steve again.

“My mom follows my dad around like a puppy. Honestly, I think she’s afraid of not having the money and lifestyle he provides her.”

You exhale heavily as you sit on the couch, fidgeting with your fingers. “The, um, the first time I drank excessively was after I was signed to my first label. I called my family and I told them thinking maybe this would prove to them I am good enough to make it. One of the many times I would think that while moving up in my career.” You roll your eyes before continuing. “My dad said ‘Wow. Amazing. Hey, did you hear that they renewed that show your mom and I like for a new season? Pretty cool.’”

Eddie and Steve came to sit on either side of you as they listened to you speak. When you froze, they tried to urge you to continue.

“What about the drugs? When did that start?”

“Simon.”, you chuckle under your breath. “Three years ago…my mom and I got into a fight because I invited her to come visit me for the billionth time and they both came up with some excuse. I was drinking but it wasn’t enough so…” Your eyes met Steve’s before turning to find Eddie’s. “You both are actually the first people to walk into my life and not use me or be toxic.”

“Give us time. I’m sure we can be toxic if we tried.”

“Munson, oh my god. Shut up.” Steve reached over to playfully swat at his friend making you laugh.

“Why aren’t you guys taken? Do you get into bad relationships to?”

“Yes and no. Stevie here has gotten the bulk of bad relationships.”

His eyes met yours as he softly smiled down at you, throwing his hands up in slight surprise when you crawl into his lap.

“I’m sorry, Steve.”

The man heavily sighs as his palm reaches up to pet your head. “It’s alright. I mean, it is what it is.”

“I haven’t…been with anyone…since what happened with Simon. I wouldn’t hurt you both like that. I…I really like you. I like the way…I feel with you.”

“And how is that?”, Eddie asked with a gentle tone.

“Safe. Protected. Cared for.”

“We do care about you. Very much.”, Steve cooed as he kissed your forehead.

“Can you show me? Show me how much you care about me.”

“Are you sure you’re up for that? You’ve been through a lot these past few days.”

You nod vigorously as your lips land on his neck, tenderly kissing along the skin of his throat.

“Hey, hey…” Lightly tugging on your hair, he pulls you back to look at him as his voice changes to a more authoritative one. “What’s the rule? When we ask you something…”

“I verbally answer. I’m sorry, Steve. Yes, yes, I’m up for anything as long as I’m with you two.”

He flashes you a comforting smile before shifting your body till your legs were straddling either side of his and your back was to his chest.

“Good girl, baby. Lean back and get comfortable.”

You do as he suggests, placing a kiss on his cheek before resting your forehead against it. His palms roam you along your arms to your knees and back up between your thighs.

“You’re so beautiful, honey. Isn’t she beautiful, Ed?”

“Gorgeous.” The hand closest to him reaches out to caress his face as he turns into your touch and kisses your hand.

Steve’s fingers grip the bottom of your shirt as he lifts it over your head and tosses it aside. The feeling of him rubbing his strong, palms along your tummy and just under your breasts sets you ablaze. You could sit like this forever and be happy. Eddie scoots closer and you lightly moan when you feel his lips kiss your shoulder, down to your tits.

Your legs start to close to relieve the pressure building in your core but they are both faster, each hand keeping you open as the metalhead wraps his mouth around your nipple. Throwing your head back, Steve’s lips meet your own as his tongue dances with yours. Feeling him shift slightly, you gasp out a groan when his hand massages your other breast, his fingers gliding over the erect bud as Eddie’s tongue plays with the one on his side.

“Fuck…”

“Does that feel good?”

Your nose grazes his as you nod. “Yes. Fe-feels really good.”

“Is that why your grinding your hips?”, he chuckles.

“Can I take off my shorts, please?”

Eddie’s mouth released its grip on you with a satisfying pop as he trailed up your body to the side of your neck.

“Oh, Steve. She said please. How can we say no when she’s being so polite?” Hooking his digits into the waistband of your pants and panties, you lift your hips, allowing him more mobility to pull them down your legs.

His head tilted to look at you as he reached between your thighs to spread open your pussy lips.

“Jesus. Pretty girl is so wet already.”

As soon as the pads of his fingers graze your clit, you know you aren’t going to last long.

“Please…”

“Please what, princess?”

“Touch me.”

“I am touching you.” Your eyebrows furrow in frustration at his answer and Eddie promptly grabs your cheeks, turning you to face him. “No attitude. No whining. If you can’t tell me…why don’t you show me what you want.”

As if to help you, Steve grabs your wrist and places your hand where his friend’s had just been. Sliding your fingers through your slick, you push two into your sex, leaning back again as you moan. It’s not enough, not even close. You need their long, thick fingers to reach the places you can’t. Your eyes meet the metalhead’s as you silently plead for him to get the message.

“Need something?”

“You. I need your fingers inside of me. Please.”

Placing his lips gently on your own, he takes over what you are doing and effortlessly glides his digits into you. Eddie thrusts into you at a quick, brutal pace as your arm wraps around Steve’s neck to cling to his hair.

“You have to be open with us, Y/N. Always. We can’t automatically know what you want.”

“I-I figured—fuck—I thought you would…know what I need. Wh-what’s best for me?”

Your surprised when you hear them both chuckle.

“That’s a whole different level of trust, sweetheart. I don’t know if we’re there yet.”

“I’m sorry.” His rhythm slowed then as he scanned you over. “That…that I haven’t given you enough of a reason to trust me yet. I’ll do better. I promise.”

“Baby…” Your heart broken little girl voice was tearing them apart. Steve kissed your temple as Eddie used his free hand to brush some of your hair back. “I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant. We do trust you. You’ve gotten so much better at proving that to us since we met you.”

“What he means is, he doesn’t think you’re ready to let go and trust us like that.”

“But—”

“Sweetheart, it’s not a bad thing or anything you should be ashamed of. We just…after everything you’ve been through with people commanding you around and hurting you…”

“I wouldn’t have asked you here, if I didn’t feel comfortable letting go and trusting you.”

“To be fair, you didn’t ask. You led and we followed.”

Gripping Eddie’s wrist, you moved his hand from between your legs and climbed onto his lap, cupping his cheeks forcefully in your hands.

“Tonight, I’m letting go. I told you to show me how much you care about me. No reservations, no holding back.” When they glanced at each other, you roughly moved his face to focus back on you. “I said…show me.” His chocolate eyes glare into your confident ones before you’re abruptly lifted from behind and carried to the bedroom.

You were so entranced by the other boy that you didn’t even notice Steve stand until he took hold of you. After throwing you on to the mattress, you watch as they quickly get undressed, and kick their clothes aside. Without saying a word, Steve dropped to his knees, grabbed your thighs, and yanked you to the end of the bed.

Closing your eyes, a moan left your throat as he practically shoved his face into your cunt and his tongue began devouring you. You felt a dip beside you and turned to find Eddie holding his cock as he brought the end to your lips.

“Open.”, he commanded. As soon as your mouth parted just enough, he pushed himself between them, lacing his fingers into your hair as he began to thrust his hips slowly. “That’s it, princess. Flat tongue, open throat. Fuck… we can do the rest.”

The metalhead grunted as you whimpered around him as his friend built you up. As your thighs tried to close, his firm hands pressed them flat as his mouth wrapped around your clit. Your eyes squeezed tighter together as you mewled and hollowed out your cheeks. Drool and spit were leaking from both corners of your mouth as both men held you still.

Eddie suddenly pulled back, leaning down till his forehead was against yours as his grip on your hair tightened.

“Cum, baby. Cum all over Steve’s face. It’s ok if it’s messy. We like it that way.” Your hand clung to his wrist as you panted against his lips, moaning as the coil snapped, and your legs shook in the other man’s grasp. “Good girl, sweetheart. Good girl.”

Steve rose to his feet lifting you again, bringing you further up the mattress, and man handling you onto your stomach. Spreading your legs a bit wider and lifting your lower half, you groaned when you felt him spit directly into your pussy before guiding his cock into your entrance. Falling flat against you, he rolls his hips, allowing you to adjust to the feeling of him as your eyes roll.

“F-fuck yes. Yes, Steve. P-please.”, you beg as he tenderly traces kisses along your shoulder.

“Why are you begging, honey? I thought—fuck—I thought you wanted us to take control? For us to show you we know what’s best for you?”

“I-I-I do. I just… you feel so good. Please.”

“Shhhh. Shhhh. It’s ok, pretty girl. I got you, baby.” His palm slides around to grasp your throat as he grounded his hips harder into you. Your eyes widen, jaw going slack as he grunts loudly behind you and thrusts into a bit faster. “You feel so fucking good, Y/N. Your little pussy takes me so well. I’m gonna take care of you, ok? You…you remember what to say if I’m hurting you?”

You could barely form a coherent thought let alone answer his question. Ringed fingers moved some of your hair out of your face as Eddie’s breath warmed your ear.

“Come on, princess. You can do it. What do you say if you feel uncomfortable or if we’re hurting you?”

“P-P-Paris.”

“Good girl.” You felt like you wanted to cry with happiness when they both praised you.

Steve leaned back on his knees and lifted his leg, placing his foot near your side. One of his hands held the meat of your ass as the other grabbed the back of your neck, pressing you into the mattress. At this angle, when he slammed his hips into yours, you swore you felt him reach your inside your stomach. Eddie’s hand reached for yours and you held on to it tightly as Steve punched his cock into you.

Releasing his hold on you, the man placed his hand beside your head allowing you to crane your neck so you could look at him.

“So…deep, Steve. Fuck.”

“Does my dick feel good, baby?”

“Y-Yes, Steve.”

“Cum, Y/N. Cum hard on my cock.” Pumping into you faster, you screamed into the sheets as you felt your walls clench around him and your vision was blinded by white. “Goddamn it! Come here. Come here, pretty girl.”

Pulling out, he grabbed your arm as he fell back against the bed, fisting himself with your slick as he guided your lips to his tip. “Open up, honey.” Without hesitation, you took over, bobbing your head as fast and deep as you could. Whimpering, his fingers aggressively threaded through your hair to hold you still as he thrust his warm spend down your throat. “Fuck…go-good girl. Take it all and swallow.”

As you softly trailed kisses up stomach to his chest, Eddie laid himself beside you two, shoulder to shoulder with his friend. You glanced his way and he offered you big, sexy grin in return.

“No rush, sweetheart. Take your time.”

When your eyes met Steve’s again his head tilted in amusement when he realized what headspace you were in and what you were looking for. Cupping your cheeks in his hands, he brings your lips gently to his own.

“You want to fuck Eddie, baby girl?” When you nod, his thumb caresses your bottom lip. “Ok. Why don’t you ask him if that’s ok.”

“Eddie…can I fuck you, please?”

Your needy, little voice had the metalhead licking his lips as he motioned for you with his fingers. “Yeah, beautiful. Come here.” Placing you on his lap, you straddle his waist as your hands reach out to hold his shoulders while he grips the base of his cock. Lifting your hips, you gradually descend on to him, both of you moaning at the feel of him stretching your walls. Your sweaty forehead falls against his as you begin to grind.

“That’s it, sweetheart. God, you’re so gorgeous especially—mmm—especially riding my dick. Really ride it, babe. Take all of me.” His palms take hold of your sides as you lean back and do what he says. They both watch with glassy eyes as your tits bounce along with you. “Come on, Y/N. Harder!” You whimper with pleasure as he smacks your ass, trying to move as hard as you can.

“E-Eddie. Please…help.”

“You need some help?” Taking your face in his hands, he brings you down to your chest is flush with his as presses your face into the pillow behind him. “Of course you do, little one. You know why? Only we know how to please you.”

His hips thrust up into yours hard and you immediately saw stars. Grunts and groans filled your ears as he set an aggressive pace.

“Y-you’re doing so good, Y/N. Fuck…your cunt is so fucking tight. It’s too good. Let go again, sweetheart. Let me make you cum.”

Eddie released you and you sat back as your own palms leaned against his chest while his hands forced you down to meet each pump of his hips. Steve reached over you both and rapidly rubbed against your clit as you moaned loudly.

They watch as you come undone, trembling as you pant and fall forward with your mouth just above his. The metalhead’s lips passionately dance with yours as he continues thrusting into you until you feel him release inside of you.

Everything is silent except for both of you trying to catch your breath. Eddie’s hands glide up your back as he holds on to you, carefully turning you two on to your side and slowly pulling himself out of your now aching hole.

His breathy chuckle fills the room as he pets your head that is still pressed into his chest.

“You didn’t die on me, did you?”

Feeling movement behind you, you quickly turned to grab Steve’s arm. “No! Don’t go.”, you plead.

“Hey. You said you trust me right?” You nod. “Good. Plus, this hotel room isn’t like the fucking mansions you usually stay in so…” He continues talking to you in a light tone as he heads for the kitchen to grab a bottle of water. “…you can see me walk from each room without a telescope.”

You smile as he jumps back into bed, opens the cap, and hands it to you. After glugging back half of it, you hand him back the bottle who in turn hands it to his friend.

“You always put him first.” Steve’s head shot up to look at you. “I’m not saying it like it’s a flaw. It’s just something I noticed. You make sure everyone else’s needs are met first.”

He gazes out the window for a moment before softly smiling in your direction and taking you in his arms to carry you into the bathroom. Placing you on the sink, he spoke as he started making a bath.

“Probably because I know what it feels like not to be taken care of. That’s probably also why we’re so good at this job. Remember, I told you my dad had this idea of who he wanted me to be? Well, he never even stuck around to make sure it happened. I spent most of my childhood alone or with friends.”

“I’m sorry, Steve.” Eddie comes up to your side and lifts you again, placing you in the warm water before they both follow after. “I like that you’re both loyal to each other. It’s one of the first things I noticed. Honestly, except for Sarah, I think everyone else is looking out for themselves.”

“Maybe…when you go home…you should change that.”, the metalhead sighs as he cleans you. “It’s been really hard for us watching Mark talk down to you the way he has.”

“And Jack.”, Steve adds. “It sucks because we can’t protect you like that.”

“Like what?”

“Y/N, if you worked for us we would have fired all these people already. As soon as Mark raised his voice to demean you, we would have told him to fuck off. But we work for you. Technically, even he is above us.”

“I’m learning. It’s part of the reason I’ve been such a bitch. I panic when I feel out of control so I just ugh!”, you playfully growl to emphasis your point.

“It’s called fight or flight, sweetheart.”, Eddie smirks. “You lean more towards the fight side like we do but sometimes…”

“What about you, Ed? Were you cared for as a kid?”

“By my mom, yeah. Then a few years later with my uncle after my dad went in.”

“May I ask what he did to get sent to jail?”

“No, you may not.” His tone was stern but not rough in any way. It was meant to be a warning.

“Are you ready to get out, honey?”, Steve whispers. After you nod, he rises from the tub and helps you step onto the tile, wrapping you in a towel as he dries you off.

“Have you two ever been out of the country?”

“My parents have so many times but not me.”

You glance at the metalhead who shakes his head as he shuffles the towel through his hair. The other boy leads you back into the bedroom and helps get you into some fresh pajamas.

“Maybe, if we’re up for it, tomorrow I can show you guys around. Paris is a beautiful city.”

“That sounds like a good idea, baby. For right now though, are you hungry or anything?”

“No. Thank you for asking but I’m exhausted.”

Steve smiles as he watches you crawl under covers, letting you get comfortable before doing the same and pulling your back to his chest. Eddie lays in front of you and you pleasantly sigh as he touches your cheek.

“I’m sorry for being short with you. I have some trouble talking about that period in my life.”

“I understand. Trust me. I get it better than anyone. Whenever you’re ready, sweetheart. I’ll be here.”

He chuckles as he watches your eyelids become heavier. “I don’t think you’ve called me anything like that before. Usually it’s just ‘Eddie’ or ‘Asshole’.”

You smirk as he leans down to kiss your forehead.

“We’re here to, Y/N, and we aren’t going anywhere any time soon.”

###############

@rckstrbee @melodymishahiddlestan @strangerfreak

@siriuslysmoking @micheledawn1975 @cositaslua

@munsonmoonshine86 @unfocused81 @paleidiot

@dad-steddie @aol19 @strngrlytn @mrsjellymunson

@needylilgal022

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pedge-stuff · 9 months

Note

God I just thought about an idea for pedro and reader, reading your last post...

They are in a relationship and live together. The reader is also an actress. She asks pedro to practice her lines with her. In the play, she is having a really long line, breaking up with the person ans leaving them... pedro can't continue... at night in bed they are cuddling and pedro talks about how he hated the feeling or the thought of the reader ever leaving

(changed this slightly, hope that is OK...)

bad acting (pedro pascal x gn/m!reader)

a/n: same vague universe as “marked,“ per usual.

thanks, as always, for everything.

(also I did that thing where I didn't save this on drafts fast enough and the whole fucking thing deleted so you could say im LIVID sorry if this rewrite felt rushed.)

summary: things get a little... too real.

—————————————————————————

"You can't laugh."

"I'm not gonna laugh!"

Pedro hands you his iPad, script loaded on the screen. "I'm serious," you warn him, "you had to stop last time, the acting was so bad."

"Just read the sides, baby."

You know he isn't nervous about the audition— if he was, he sure as shit wouldn't be practicing with you. Those rehearsals are reserved for his coach, or someone who can actually talk him through the scene. This was just a formality, a quick read-through for some anthological TV show about people in failing marriages. Season 2 of Oscar's old Amazon thing. With the audition being on Zoom tomorrow, the whole process feels fairly relaxed.

"Should I read it in a lady voice? Will that set the scene?"

"Please don't."

"Scottish accent?"

"Babe."

"Hmm." You clear your throat loudly, for dramatic effect. Across the room, feet propped on the desk, Pedro rolls his eyes. He's got his cheaters on, but no script— the audition's supposed to be off-book. "From the first page?"

"You're stalling."

"Ugh. Ok. Here we go." Leaning forward, you scroll to the highlighted text on the iPad. "Stop, David. You don't know what you're talking about."

Pedro's posture straightens; ever the professional, it's like watching a switch flip. The humored lines beside his eyes, little crows feet that crinkle when he looks at you, disappear completely. His brow furrows, gaze darkens.

"Of course I do, dammit. I'm done with this, all of this. It's like living in a mausoleum, Emma. I'd rather. Do you remember what love even feels like? Because I look at you, and I just... don't, anymore."

"You don't mean that."

"I do! I'm so tired of this. Life with you is joyless. Every day, I come home from work and just sit in the goddamn driveway because I don't want to come in the house. It's hard to be in the same room as you. I can't bring her back, Emma, and I miss her and I'm sorry she's dead. But it isn't my fucking fault and I wish you'd stop pretending it was."

His voice cracks, just a little. You frown as he grabs the glass of water beside him, pausing to wait, but he motions for you to continue.

"That's cruel," you read, "and you know it. That's not fair."

"None of this is fair!" Pedro exclaims. "That's the whole point. It's not fair that our daughter is dead while the girl who was driving got to walk away clean. Life isn't fucking fair. But it's life. And you've sucked all the light out of mine. I can't stand you, anymore, I'm sorry. I just can't. It's not that we can't make it work, it's that I don't want to make it work. If I never see you again, it'll be too soon. Jesus christ, I hate every part of this."

"Are you done? Have you gotten it all off your chest?"

"Don't placate me! This isn't one of your stupid therapy sessions, Emma, you can't fix this with a breathing worksheet and a roleplaying exercise. Be fucking serious. Every day I wake up and I wish I'd never met you. At least then, she wouldn't be dead, because she'd never have existed. And maybe I'd known some goddamn peace."

The page ends there, and you glance up. Pedro has his head in his hands, eyes closed.

"That was good," you offer tentatively, searching for some kind of sign as to what his next move is. He's gracious about work stuff, but you're always a little afraid of mucking up his process.

When he looks up, his eyes are glossy. "Yeah," Pedro says, croakily, clearing his throat quietly before rising from the chair. He takes the iPad back, wordlessly, shuttering the case over the screen.

"Wanna do it again? You were spot-on, Pedge, but we can go over it again if you want to."

"No," he says quickly. "No, I'm good. I'm fine. It's on Zoom, it'll be easy. I'm fine."

Weird. Just a little. Before you can dwell on his sudden cageyness, he's up, headed for the door.

"I'm gonna walk the dogs. We can catch up on Bake-Off, when I get back?"

Pedro leaves before you can answer.

— — —

No sooner have the leashes been hung back by the door, than Pedro is beside you on the couch, all hands and light touches. It's as if he can't bear to lost contact. You allow him to reposition you, reaching a hand around your waist as you reach for the remote.

"Good walk?"

He hums, tugging you against him. Settles, finally, once you're half-reclined, back against his chest, arm around your middle. You fiddle with the edge of his sleeve as the bakers fumble their way through the signature challenge.

It's not that the clinginess bothers you— he's like this sometimes, when he's just returned home, or you've arrived in LA, or met somewhere in the middle. Every separation leaves him want for touch. It's the one thing you can't give him, while you're apart.

But he's been home a couple weeks now, in between reshoots for a new project. Been home all day, in fact, in an orbit around you while you attempted to work from home. (A little too close, frankly, but you can't really complain.)

"You okay?" You whisper, as the timer runs down on the technical bake.

No answer. Just a tightened grip on your waist, and a firm kiss to the top of your head.

— — —

It isn't until later, in bed and half-asleep, that you pinpoint the source of the tension.

You'd have thought he was already asleep, save for the soft carding of his fingers through the baby hairs at the nape of your neck. Deep, even breaths tickle your forehead; he's curled around you, arm draped over your back. Had positioned himself this way silently, looking a little silly brooding in his Muppet-patterned pj pants.

"We're never reading lines again," Pedro whispers into the darkness.

"Was the acting that bad?"

Your attempt for levity falls flat. He is quiet, long enough for you roll backwards slightly, to get a better look at his face. A deep-set frown has taken root.

"No, it..." He tugs you closer again, tucking your head beneath his chin. If he weren't so sad, you'd call uncle for claustrophobia; your nose is squished into his jugular. But you lay still, waiting for him to continue.

"It felt too real," Pedro concedes. He inhales sharply, and you can feel it against your own chest.

The kiss you press to the hollow of his throat, doesn't feel good enough. You wiggle, tilting your head to press one against his toothpaste-tasting lips. Whiskers tickle the corner of your mouth.

"Baby, I know you were... pretending." A thin line between placating him and treading on his professionalism. "If our pretend daughter died in a car crash, I know you wouldn't divorce me for being too sad."

"It's not funny." With a groan, he kisses you again, resting his forehead against yours. "I hated saying that stuff to you. Felt too real."

The bone-crushing spooning is making a little more sense, now.

"I love you, but you're a sap."

"Hmph."

You smile into the next kiss. "A very sweet sap, though."

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal imagine #pedro pascal one shot #pedro pascal rpf #pedro pascal x male reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal fluff #pedro pascal fanfiction #the last of us #din djarin #joel miller #joel miller x reader #din djarin x reader #din djarin x male reader #joel miller x male reader #the mandolorian

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littlexscarletxwitch · 10 months

Text

── ༊*·˚⋆ 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝘇𝗼𝗻𝗲

paring: florence pugh x fem!reader

tag(s): fluff, a drop of angst, some comfort, sad imagine, established relationship, long-distance relationship, flo being an amazing gf

warning(s): language, heartbreak (?), grammatical errors, unedited

word count: 1.8k

note: I cannot write a sad ending for the life of me lol, but one day I will. And you won't see it coming (jk). I thought I would never post this fic, when the song came out I had like the main idea but never proceed to write it down. But I'm glad I finally wrote it, it was long time overdue lol. I'm not a native english speaker, so please let me know about any sort of mistake. Love, M <3

note 2: So I made the mistake (wait was it really a mistake? I dunno) to listen to 'Needed me' by Rihanna while finishing up this fic. What do we think about smut for part 2 ??????

requests are open! + check my rules + masterlist <3

You were laying on your bed, eyes closed, pretending everything was fine, when in reality it was quite the opposite.

“I hate this,” you mumbled to your phone for Florence to hear.

“I know, baby… Me too. I just wish I could be there with you,” she said as she hugged herself, pretending that it was you who was holding her.

The yawn you were trying so hard to hold back finally slipped out. “Yeah, you keep saying that…”

The words rushed out of your mouth without giving them a second thought, you didn’t mean to sound mean or angry, but you had and it had already reached her ears.

“Yeah, well, I’m working. You know that,” she immediately replied, she sounded both hurt and angry, and you cursed yourself for that.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. I’m sorry, I’m just really tired. Today was a really long day, I’m sorry, baby,” the last thing you needed was to pick another fight for such a small thing over the goddamn phone.

You breathed out, trying to calm your own thoughts. It felt like the only thing Florence and you would do was fight over the phone. The two of you could only share a couple of hours together through the little device, and the two of you would waste it over some stupid fights. The whole situation was stressful, not just the fights or your job, but being so far away from each other that it physically hurt. And it hurt even more that you two would be constantly fighting.

You heard her taking a deep breath, she felt the same as you, you knew it. She was tired and stressed and had a lot going on at work. But she wanted to be with you more than anything, hold you, kiss you, touch you and whisper sweet nothings to your ear.

But you couldn’t tell that by her deep huff. You figured she was tired about this, about you, about this whole situation which did no good to either of you.

“Maybe… maybe we should take a break…” you muttered, not wanting to be heard but she already had.

As soon as the words left your lips you regretted even having thought of them. You didn’t mean it, that was the last thing you could ever possibly ask for in this world. But maybe it was what she wanted and needed. Maybe she was just too scared to pronounce the words so you had to do it instead.

A break? Florence thought, not wanting to believe the words that came out of your mouth. Things were pretty bad if you wanted to take a break. Shit, she really screwed up. Was that really what you wanted? A break? A break away from her and her shit. It would make sense, right? You were tired, she was tired, but were you really tired of her? You wouldn’t have said anything if you didn't mean to, right?

“Yeah, maybe we should. If that’s what you want, love…” she let her head fall against the wall, trying to find some kind of support, praying to the universe that you would take back your request.

Well, there it was, she wanted to take a break. And who were you to deny her such a thing? You were willing to give her everything, this wasn’t the exception, even if it broke your heart.

You cleared your throat, afraid your voice would betray you. “Yeah, okay,” you said, fighting back the tears.

“Okay…”

As soon as you heard her, you hung up, not wanting her to hear you as you sobbed. You felt your heart shrinking, a burning feeling creeped throughout your entire body, and the more you cried the more you felt like your head was about to explode. And you laid there, hand clutch to your stomach, feeling cold and alone.

You felt Billie cuddling your feet, trying to give you some comfort since she could sense your sadness. And even though all the poor thing wanted was to show some support to one of her favourite humans, she unintentionally made everything worse, since she was a reminder of her owner. The two of you lay there, you crying your heart out, until the both of you dozed off to sleep.

[…]

The moment you hang up, she realised what had happened, that it wasn’t a dream, more like a nightmare if that were the case. But it was real, it had happened and she didn’t stop you. Why didn’t she stop you?

“Fuck!” she cursed, throwing her phone on the bed.

She took her hands to her head in disbelief, the last moments of her life going through her mind on repeat over and over again.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” she screamed at the top of her lungs.

She was angry. Angry at herself for not having done something about it, she should have told you that it was a mistake, that it wasn’t what she wanted, not even close. At her work, she loved working, she really did, but was it really worth it when it ruined the best thing that has ever happened to her? —you. At the distance between the two of you, at the stupid body of water keeping you seven thousand miles away from her. She was even angry at the stupid different timezone for constantly keeping the two of you apart.

She couldn’t help to imagine you laying in your shared bed, probably wearing an old oversized t-shirt of hers, or maybe not given that you two had broken each other's heart, now sleeping right where she was supposed to be.

She couldn’t stop hearing your voice in her head, a fucking break? What were you thinking? What was she thinking? She should have told you that it was crazy, that it was a mistake, that it was completely bullshit.

Her head was starting to hurt from all thinking, her heart began to shatter as the realisation sinked in and as her anger slowly faded away sadness began to wash over her. She felt her stomach churn at how wrong this whole thing felt.

She was supposed to be running lines, but she couldn't concentrate anymore as the only thing that popped on her mind was you. She had to do something about it, she couldn't leave things between you two like this, she couldn’t go to sleep that night knowing that she let you go that easily.

“Screw it,” she said to herself, not giving her actions a second thought or else she feared she might back down.

She grabbed her phone, grateful that it hadn’t landed on the floor, and made all the calls she needed to. She was going to fix this, she had to.

[…]

You felt the sunlight creeping through the curtains even though your eyes were still closed. Slowly and carefully you opened them up, as you began to gain consciousness you felt like your head was about to explode. The events of last night came rushing to your mind like a slap to your cheek. The call, the words that were spoken, the tears that were shed and Billie cuddling at your feet offering you some comfort.

You got up, brushed your teeth, took a painkiller and went back to laying. You began to think things through. What were you supposed to do now? Did Florence expect you to leave her house? Who was going to take care of Billie while she was gone? Should you just gather your things and leave? Toby can take care of Billie, he used to do it before you came along, that would be no problem. Shit, what were you going to tell him once you got there with Billie?

You shook your head, letting the thoughts fade away as it was all becoming too much too fast and too real. You could already feel the tears burning your eyes just by the thought of leaving the place Florence and you had been sharing over the past two years.

You decided that you were done thinking for the moment. You found some ice cream in the fridge and made your way to the living room. You dropped down on the couch, a blanket over your shoulders, and snatched the remote control from the coffee table.

You were just about to watch your comfort show when you heard the jingle of keys. Your heart dropped, who could possibly be?

“Y/n?” you heard as the door flew open. “Y/n, where are you?”

You didn’t answer, the words wouldn't come out of your mouth.

“Ah, there you are,” Florence said, she seemed out of breath, as if she had been running or something.

“What are you–?” but she cut you off right away.

“No, let me go first, okay?” she didn’t wait for an answer. “I have this whole speech planned and it’s already fading away so…” she took a deep breath. “This is bullshit, Y/n. I’m not having this. A break?! Are you serious?” she said, stepping closer to you.

“Florence—.”

“I’m not done yet, love,” she was now sitting right next to you, her warm hands reaching out for your cold ones. “I get it, we had a rough couple of months, always bickering at each other. But that doesn’t mean we should take a break, I’m not going to let you go, Y/n.”

“But you agreed—”

“I only agreed because I thought that was what you wanted, but it’s not even close to what I want. That’s why I’m here,” you felt the tears in the corner of your eyes, your bottom lip slightly trembling. “I’m here to tell you: no, I don’t want a fucking break. I don’t give a shit about my work, about the contracts that I signed. The only thing I care about is you, and I’m going to make it work, make us work. Because I love you, Y/n. So fuck your ‘break’, you hear me? Fuck it.”

You looked at her soft green eyes, even though your vision was half blurry you could still make out her watery eyes.

“That was a great speech,” you joked, your heart getting warmer as a smile formed on her lips.

“Yeah, well a 10 hour flight gives you a lot of time to think about—”

Your lips stopped her from talking as you threw yourself on her, connecting your lips in a much needed kiss. A kiss that you had been dreaming of the last couple of months.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” you whispered over and over again on her lips as you kissed her.

You were straddling her, both of your hands cupping her cheeks caressing her soft skin. You felt her hands sneaking around your waist, gently squeezing your skin. And then moving them further down to rest on your ass, pushing you more into her chest.

Much to your dismay, you pulled away from her lips, feeling the need to actually pronounce these words: “I missed you, so so much, Florence.”

“Me too, baby. Me too,” she said, leaving kisses all over your neck. “In fact, let me show you how much I missed you,” her hot breath gave you goosebumps, as you threw your head back, giving her more access to your sensitive skin.

Likes, comments and reblogs are appreciated! <3

-M

#florence pugh #florence pugh x reader #florence pugh x fem reader #florence pugh x you #florence pugh x y/n #florence pugh imagine #littlexscarletxwitch's fic #Spotify #[🎧⊹♡] based on songs i love

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midnightdevotion · 2 years

Text

Seeing Red

Request: Rooster/ the rest of the gang protect the reader

Pairing: Rooster x reader (AFAB)

Warnings: SA themes are in this, talk about being drugged etc, PLEASE DON'T READ IF THIS TRIGGERS YOU

a/n: I hope you like it!

Rooster has been in love with you since the night he first met you. You were stunning, and stole the breath from his lungs, and yeah the way you left hangman without a comeback was insanely fascinating, he has never seen anyone leave that man speechless. Being Penny's niece and wanting to take over the bar when she was ready to retire you were around often enough to become friends with the aviators.

Now Rooster is a lot of things, but he is not subtle about his emotions, in anyway. The entire crew picked up on his feelings for you within a matter of a week, and phoenix a matter of hours.

You however, were clueless. Rooster though, thought that you definitely knew, because everyone else did and you just weren't interested. So he tried so goddamn hard to not make things weird. Tried so hard to not get speechless when you'd walk up to him, or blushy when you complimented him.

He definitely felt bad anytime his head conjured up a dirty thought about you. It was especially hard on days like today. All having the Saturday off, you wanted to spend it at the beach and everyone agreed with your plan. Cursing himself now because he didn't think it through. Didn't think about the bikini you'd be wearing and how hard it would be not to think about you in every inappropriate way. Now Rooster would never try to make you uncomfortable and he could swear you sent him a wink earlier.

It was half way through the day when he realized you might be flirting with him, and it might or might not have taken a nudge from Phoenix to get him to realize, but he knew it had to be true when the next words came out of your mouth.

"Rooster, can you help me put sunscreen on?" You had bought the goddamn lotion sunscreen for this purpose exactly. Tired of hearing the whole group groan about your massive crush on the curly haired aviator. Rooster on the other hand, felt like he was going to have a heart attack. He was dying to touch your skin, god you looked so soft and perfect, but he knew the second he did, any chance of banishing his cave man thoughts about slamming you into the wall and kissing your breath away would be impossible.

With a quick nod however he stood, and moved to help you put the sunscreen on. You laid back down on the blanket you brought, and rooster tried everything in his power to not look anywhere but your back.

"mmm you give good back rubs" and if he was drinking he would have choked.

"I-uhm... thank you" and he stood faster than his damn jet flys. To anyone with eyes it was clear Rooster was flustered, but to you, it just felt like he couldn't get away fast enough.

"So-" Phoenix goes to start after plopping onto the blanket next to you.

"Oh god please don't start, Phe I tried, he's clearly not interested in me. He ran so fast it's like he's rather be stuck in a room with Hangman then touch me again" your tone was embarrassed and you left your eyes closed.

"Oh please he had to get out of here because if he didn't he was gonna get a boner" Phoenix snorted.

"Please stop giving me false hope, if he wanted me he would have made a move by now, it's been six months." You sound miserable, and you feel even worse.

"I'm just gonna get drunk tonight but I'll be fine promise Phe" You hear the brunette sigh, but she lets you wallow in self pity. Of course he didn't like you, you glance over to where he is, laughing at something bob says and your heart aches.

After a few more hours at the beach, where you carefully avoided eye contact with Rooster and even close proximity you guys headed into the hard deck. You went directly to the bar.

"Hey aunt Penny... something strong please" Penny knew exactly what your feelings for rooster were, and knew that your albeit horrible sun tan lotion plan hadn't panned out just by looking at your face. She grinned just a little bit, when she saw a confused Bradley standing at the doorway of the bar, wondering why you started acting distant to him.

"You sure about that? There's a lost puppy waiting by the door for you" You scoffed at her words.

"Please penny it's been six months, I can't keep pining after a man who isn't interested it's embarrassing"

Rooster finally made his way into the bar, standing by bob not even hiding the glances he sent your way every 3 seconds. He can't stop his overthinking, did he say something that made you mad? Worse did he do something that made you mad? He tried to be nothing but respectful of you so he can't think of anything. His jaw clenches when he sees some drunk asshole come up to you, you look uncomfortable, sending a fake smile his way.

"My god Bradshaw stop moping and get over here so I can kick your ass at darts" He hears Hangman's annoying voice enter his ears. Rolling his eyes, he stands figuring beating hangman at something might be better than watching you like a creep.

When Rooster wins the first round, hangman insists it has to be best 2 out of 3. Rooster doesn't fight him on this, instead just going to grab the darts for the second game. That's when he sees it.

You are trying to shove this guys hands off of you, it looks like he is trying to make you walk out of the bar with him and that's all it takes for Rooster to take off towards you.

It takes him all of ten seconds to cross the crowded bar, the look of murderous rage enough for most people to clear a pathway for him. The dagger team left behind confused until they see his target. They all start following, all of them knowing you weren't huge into going home with strangers.

"staahp--- I don't--I don't want to go.." He hears your slurred speech and he sees red. Rooster isn't naive, there's no way you got this drunk in one game of darts.

"Let go of her right now" His voice cuts like a knife, hard and steely. To question him would be nothing but stupid. The sleezy drunk guy doesn't give a shit though.

"No, go find your own lay" were his slurred words, Bradley isn't the type of person to ask twice. So he punches the drunk bastard right in the face. Hearing a sickening crack as the asshole falls to the floor. Everyone around him is expecting him to beat the shit out of the guy, all surprised when he turns to you, supporting you up.

When your brain catches up to the situation and you realize Rooster now has a hold on you, you grin. It makes the red he is seeing lessen, and the effect you have on him is palpable.

"Hi roos" your eyes are soft when you look at him, drugged state leaving you totally without inhibition and immediately you forget about any one else.

"Hi honey" Roosters answer would have made you combust sober, but drugged you just giggles. Rooster makes eye contact with Jake and he nods, making sure the drunk asshole rooster punched gets what he deserves. Rooster would love more than anything to stay back and beat the shit out of the guy, but you've always been more important than anything else to him. So he clenches his fist and releases an angry breath.

Rooster brings his attention back to you when he feels your finger poke his nose. Raising his eyebrow down at you, he can't help the lightness in his heart when he sees you grinning at him.

"C'mon lets go get you in bed so you can sleep this off" he keeps his arm firmly wrapped around your waist, helping to guide you out the door.

He manages to get you into his bronco, not without some struggling as you are wiggling around. He gets the buckle on you and you are mumbling to yourself. He sighs as he walks around the car to get in, he should've intervened when he saw you looking uncomfortable. He should've stopped this.

When he gets in, he sees you dramatically turn your head to him. He sees your face looking sad and it breaks his heart a little.

"Rooster why don't you like me" His heart freezes, how could you think he doesn't like you, he's literally in love with everything about you, and he's seen you hangry.

"Darling of course I like you" He doesn't expect to see you huff and cross your arms over your body at this.

"No B-Bradley I mean in a romantic way... all I want is you to notice me" He swallows hard, you are drugged on god knows what, you have no idea what your saying, you probably don't even mean it. He can't stop his heart from beating faster and the hope that fills him that maybe this isn't just a drugged rant though.

"Honey you aren't yourself right now.. lets talk about this tomorrow okay?" he watches as you pout from the passenger seat for a good thirty seconds before your mind turns to focus on something else.

"ROOS! roll down my window please!" you all but shout his name and it makes him flinch, but he does as requested, watching as you stick your fingers out into the wind. He thanks whatever luck is on his side that this keeps you occupied for the drive back to his place.

"he-hey this isn't where I live"

"Ah ever the observant one little lady, it's my house" and even in your fogged mind it makes your heart beat faster, never having been to Rooster's place.

As he comes to open your door and unbuckle you, he's close enough he can smell the suntan lotion he put on you and the salt water from the ocean on your skin. He can hear phoenix calling him love drunk when he wants nothing more than to hold you close and breathe you in.

"I want a piggy back ride Bradshaw" the serious look on your face when he pulls away to get you out of the car has him grinning.

"whatever you want honey, climb on" he guides you onto his back, ready to catch you if you slip. Once you are all settled, he starts walking you in. You sigh contentedly as he carries you into the house, going back to the kitchen. Setting you on the counter he makes quick work of getting you water.

"Drink this"

"you are hot when you're bossy" you move right on to drink the water, like you hadn't just made rooster freeze, and almost choke on air. He knows you have no idea what your saying, and probably won't even remember it tomorrow, but none the less it still has him blushing.

When you finish your water, he makes sure you don't need anything else, before picking you back up and continuing your piggy back up the stairs. He stops at his bed, letting you go from higher up so you fall back, laughing at the squeal that leaves your lips.

Moving to his closet, he grabs out a shirt of his for you, knowing you wouldn't want to sleep in your jean shorts and tank top. His intentions are just to hand you the shirt and let you have his bed for the night. However, when he hands you his shirt, and turns around you get stuck.

"Roos... I need help" comes your muffled voice, and when he looks back at you, he sees your head stuck in your tank top and arm twisted funny. He also sees your black lacy bra which has him gulping and quickly averting eyes.

"Um..yeah yeah I'll just.." and he knows it's not a intelligible sentence that leaves his mouth, but his room is so hot suddenly and he's looking everywhere but you. He steps closer, hands grabbing the twisted top and trying to get it untwisted. His fingers gingerly brush against your skin a few times trying to get it off of you, how did you get it so messed up so quickly??

He's blushing so hard his whole body has to be a tomato, he's sure of it. He quickly makes work of pushing your arms and head through his oversized t-shirt, biting his lip at how adorable you look in it.

"I need help with my-- my pants" and shit if rooster thinks he was ready to combust helping you with the shirt he thinks he might die now. He keeps his eyes on the wall behind you as he reaches down and helps unbutton your shorts. He pushes them down your legs, unintentionally feeling something lacy as he does. He feels almost disgusted with himself, because he should not be thinking about you like this when you are in this state.

"Okay darling.. that's done.. You get some rest now and I'll be on the couch if you need me"

"Noooooo Rooster come snuggle me" and he knows you have no idea what you are saying, or doing, so he hesitates.

"Please Bradley..." you give him puppy eyes and he just can't say no.

"I-Okay but just for a little bit okay sweetheart?" you nod happily as he moves to get in bed, fully clothes and on top of the covers. Resting your head on his chest it takes you all of five minutes to pass out. He kisses the top of your head, brushing stray hairs out of your face as he gently moves you to his pillow. Making his way down to the couch for his own slumber.

____

The next morning you wake with a groan, head pounding in a way it never has before. It all comes rushing back like a tsunami tide. Embarrassment heating you up like the hot California sun. You wish you could just stay in bed and die, not wanting to get up and face Rooster. Unfortunately your thirst wins out and you slowly climb your way out of bed.

You carefully make your way down the stairs, trying to be quiet in case he is still sleeping. Seeing the couch empty, you turn and see Bradley in the kitchen. Shirtless. Making your mouth drier than it already was you make your way to him.

"morning" your voice comes out in what only could be described as a croak. Rooster turns his head, the grin on his face blinding.

"morning sweetheart, theres a cup of water for you and some coffee if you feel like." he turns back to cooking the bacon that smells heavenly.

"you are a godsend Bradshaw" you quickly grab the water, chugging it all down like you have never seen a drop of this glorious liquid. You hear him chuckle as you place the glass down. Thirst quenched you now feel the embarrassment rise back up.

"I-I'm sorry for last night" He sends a raised eyebrow your way.

"darling you were drugged and you're apologizing to me??" and when he puts it that way it does sound a bit foolish but you know you weren't by any means the easiest to put up with last night either.

"I-well just thanks for taking care of me, I know it was a pain"

"It wasn't a pain, I'd take care of you any day" and his eyes lock with yours and suddenly it's like you are stuck, falling into him in every way imaginable.

"do you-do you remember last night" he breaks eye contact, using the bacon as an excuse to do so, but you see his ears tinge pink.

"I-yeah god I was so embarrassing... you don't need to worry though its okay that you don't have feelings for me, I'm sorry if I made things weird but I want to still be friends" He whips around so fast you think you might get whiplash from it.

"what- you think I don't have feelings for you" the world is spinning.

"well I- yeah, I mean you avoid me a lot of the time and then yesterday after I asked you to put lotion on me you basically couldn't get away fast enough"

"honey that's because if I stuck around any longer well the beach wouldn't have been so kid friendly" you gasp at his words, blush running up your cheeks. He makes his way to you, rounding the counter in quick steps. His hand lands on the side of your neck, thumb brushing your cheek.

"Honey I've only wanted you since I met you, but I never considered you'd wanted me back" you swallow thickly at his words and with no words left to give you simply crash your lips into his.

He's shocked at first, but quickly responds. Lips moving deliciously against yours, his free hand wrapping around your waist and pulling you against him. It sends tingles down to your toes, this man knows how to kiss a woman. He pulls away and leaves you reeling, grinning at you as he goes to flip the bacon.

"Bradley Bradshaw you better get back here right now." and he's laughing as he turns the stove off, breakfast long forgotten as you too make up for the time you've both been wasting for the last 6 months.

Taglist: @captainmarvelnerd

@alanadetigy

@luckyladycreator2

@multiplefandomsmess

@tkmarvel-divergentbish

@ohh-to-be-a-frog

@roosterschanelslut

#rooster x reader #bradley bradshaw imagine #rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #top gun maverick #top gun #rooster imagine #rooster x y/n

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raccoon-eyed-rebel · 1 year

Text

A little short

A/N: Just a short little something inspired by this lovely little interaction... This was written in, what... an hour? (It was 2, I checked. I shouldn't lie, I'm sorry.) And hardly beta'd... Still pretty pleased with it, though. Anyway enjoy the porn.

Pairing: August Walker x reader (you)

Summary: You try to prove August Walker isn't the boss of you. Turns out he is, and you're screwed.

Word count: 1.8k

Warnings: NSFW, SMUT, 18+, MINORS DNI, Angry August (that's a warning in and of itself), (semi-?)public sex, teasing, exhibitionism, voyeurism(?), unsafe sex (wrap it before you tap it, folks), use of pet names, creampie... Tell me if I forgot any.

“It’s a little short, isn’t it?” Here we go again, you thought. You looked at August, who sure seemed to appreciate the skirt he’d called too short not five seconds ago. And he always did this. With everything. And you always listened, what the fuck was up with that? No, this time, you were so goddamn tired of his bullshit that you weren’t going to change because of him.

“It’s not,” you said simply, and you walked away to put on your shoes. You were already late for drinks with August’s friends, you really didn’t have the time to rethink your entire outfit. Besides, you reminded yourself, you wanted to wear this skirt. It made your ass look good.

The boys were meeting up in a bar a town over, about an hour away, so you walked to the car with August behind you. You should have found that strange -he was usually more the type of guy to walk in front of you - but you didn’t.

“Not that one,” August said with a devilish grin on his face when you made your way to the car he usually drove. He walked past you to the other car in the garage - a gray Porsche 911. The choice surprised you; as much as he loved that car, there was no good reason for him to pick it over the Audi. It was fast and pretty, but uncomfortable, and very hard to get in and out of… Bastard, you thought to yourself. Was he really picking this because of the low instep? You looked at your heels - seven inches, what were you thinking - and skirt. Fuck it, you thought, August Walker wants a show? Let’s give him a fucking show, then. When getting into the car - August just insisted on closing the door for you - you made sure to spread your legs as wide as they would go, causing your skirt to ride up. If flashing him your panties while getting in didn’t get him worked up, the fact that he’d be sitting next to you for an hour while almost being able to see up your skirt certainly would. A voice in the back of your head asked repeatedly if you were really sure about antagonizing August, but you shoved it down. You were done with his shit, you were going to show him, you were going to make August Walker your bitch.

The drive was fun. You could shift around in your seat enough to give him little glimpses of the black lace between your legs, and from his sighs and low growls you could tell that he was getting perfectly worked up. After a while, you got bored of that, and you had an idea. Again, that voice in the back of your head spoke up, this time to tell you just how terrible that idea was, but the devil on your left shoulder cheered you on, and you went ahead with it anyway. Slowly, you dropped one hand to your lap, in between your legs. It was casual enough at first, not attracting any attention from the man next to you, but after a while you saw his eyes drift to your almost entirely bare legs often. A finger lazily trailed the fabric of your underwear. You shivered at the touch; just thinking of doing this was incredibly exciting, and your pussy was swollen and aching already. A soft hum escaped from your throat as you slowly pulled the fabric to the side and sank back into the chair, letting your legs fall to the sides a little further. You knew he could see you: The moan that he tried to hide in a conspicuous cough, the growing bulge in his pants, his hands gripping the steering wheel so hard you thought it wouldn’t withstand the force… Again, you made sure to turn in your seat in such a way that you switched between granting and denying him a glimpse of your fingers as you played with yourself. The low growling and groaning next to you egged you on, the feeling of control overwhelmed you. You didn’t look at him as you started dragging your fingers around your clit, your moans becoming louder - sometimes exaggerated, but he didn’t need to know that - as you worked yourself to your climax. When you came down from that, August’s hand was on your knees, slowly sliding up your leg, its destination more than obvious. You pushed it away determinedly.

“Please,” he said, his voice hoarse, “I just want to feel how wet you are, baby.” When you refused him again, he whimpered. The sound was that of a man who had suffered a grave injustice - August had a habit of being a baby that way. You figured you’d toy with him a little more, and with one remarkably fluent movement, you yanked the black lace garment down your legs and dropped it in his lap theatrically.

“There, feel all you want,” you said triumphantly, “you’re not touching me.” God, you felt powerful and in control, and the feeling was making you even wetter. The thought of August enduring this whole night, knowing you had no panties on turned you on immensely. In the corner of your eye, you saw him drag his thumb over the soaked material before tucking your underwear into his pocket. The last part of the drive went by quietly.

Getting out of that car was a menace - it always had been, but in your seven-inchers, it was nearly impossible.

“Baby,” you cooed, eyes wide with clearly feigned innocence - not that the tooth-rotting sweetness in your voice was fooling anybody, “I need your help getting out.” He growled, clearly annoyed by your games, which made you feel very proud, yet he walked around the car to help you nonetheless. When you looked him in the eye as you put your naked pussy on full display for him, he looked down on you with a furious look and clenched jaw. Apparently, he thought you were dragging this moment out too long, because he practically yanked you out of the car and slammed the door shut. You were trapped between the Porsche and his body, and he pressed his hips into you. He was rock hard, which made you laugh a little louder than you wanted. August didn’t find it funny at all.

“Pleased with yourself, princess?” He growled in your ear. His eyes moved through the parking garage and when they finally moved back to you, you saw it. The sadistic grin, his hungry eyes… He pulled you behind a pillar in the garage, next to the car and pressed your chest against it. Fuck, you thought, as the voice inside your head threw you annoying and repeated ‘told you so’-s. Your hips were pulled back and your skirt shoved up further to expose you completely. The air in the garage was cold, your legs were covered in goosebumps, your cheek was pressed against the hard, cold concrete of the pillar and someone could walk in and see you like this at any goddamn moment. It was all incredibly uncomfortable - at least, that’s what you figured your thoughts about this situation should be. Instead, you were absolutely dripping.

“Now, you’re going to need to keep quiet, can you do that, baby?” August whispered as he dragged two fingers along your slit. You nodded and pushed back into his hand. Without warning, he pushed both fingers into your core. They were met with little resistance, yet the abrupt intrusion made you shriek. August clicked his tongue disapprovingly.

“I guess not. Open up.” You knew that if you didn’t do as he told you, there’d be hell to pay - if not now, then when you got home, so you obeyed his command. August had found an excellent way to keep you quiet through whatever he was about to do to you, and now you found yourself with the panties you had handed him so confidently - back when you believed yourself to be in control of this situation - stuffed in your mouth. You whimpered when you heard the zipper of his trousers. The feeling of his cock pressing against your entrance turned it into a moan. You were so wet that he had no trouble at all sliding the full, throbbing length of his cock into you - so wet he couldn’t stifle an ecstatic grunt as he did. August chuckled at the shriek that came from your throat.

“This soaking little cunt is begging me to tear it apart, babygirl,” he moaned as he pulled back slowly, “it would be rude to ignore that.” A few slow, shallow thrusts followed; he stretched you out lazily, relishing the feeling of the warm wetness of your body, while at the same time teasing you. You mirrored his movements, throwing your hips back to get him to go deeper. There was nothing in this world you wanted more right now than to just have more of August inside of you.

“No no, baby, not so fast,” he chuckled and the playful slap on your bare ass echoed through the parking garage, “you teased me for an hour. You got yours, now I want mine.” You wanted so badly to tell him to just fuck you hard, but you couldn’t. Luckily, August had run out of patience during the drive, and it wasn’t long before he sank into you completely again and set a relentless pace, slamming his hips into yours with every thrust, working his cock so deep inside you that it hurt just right. You knew he wouldn’t last long going like this, not after the past hour, not after having been away from you for a week, but when he didn’t stop you got worried.

“No,” you tried to say through your improvised gag, “not inside.”

“What?” August asked in a low voice with a diabolical undertone to it. “You want me to come inside this wet little cunt?” He laughed at your largely inaudible protest. A few hard thrusts later, he finished inside of you. He pulled his cock out first, and then he freed your mouth of your underwear.

“You dick,” you hissed at him. The fact you couldn’t yell made you even angrier than you already were. “Give me those!” You reached for your panties, but August caught your wrist. He held up the flimsy garment with a wicked smile on his face.

“These? They’re soaked. So even if I were to give them back to you, you couldn’t wear them.”

“August, seriously?” You shrieked before lowering your voice again. “You want me to meet your friends with your cum dripping down my leg?”

“That hardly sounds like my problem,” he said before pressing a soft kiss to your lips. “Come on, princess, it’s a five minute walk to the bar.”

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