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rora-s · 3 years

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The Derivative Chapter 2: Shots

Chapter 1<-

I stared across the darkened classroom at my blinders. They were perched in captivity on my history teachers desk. Stolen away from me and promised release upon the end of class today. The teacher himself was blathering on about something that I didn’t find important about how history continues on today. It seemed rather a redundant point to make. Of course we were living history I mean at one point every person we learn about in history had been in their present time.

There was movement in the corner of my vision and I turned to see Mr. Hopkins had turned on the tv in the room. “...let’s see what’s on the news nowadays as an example.” after flipping past a couple static filled channels Hopkins finally found the news station he was looking for.

I was about to turn back to my thoughts when I caught what the reporter was saying “This is a live breaking report from the channel 8 news. Flying over Central Los Angeles Savings Bank. I can see multiple people lying on the ground. One appears to be a federal agent several bystanders also seemed to have been injured in the crossfire, where the shoot out between federal agents and suspected bank robbers is in progress...”

I felt like ice water had just been pumped through my veins. I froze completely in shock. I remembered back to just the other night when Don had asked Charlie for help tracking bank robbers. Could it be the same robbers? Could Don be in the shootout? Was he injured? The class continued to watch through a car explosion and more gun fire and more cops arriving. Even into the aftermath.

“I’m receiving confirmation that three people were killed in his tragic incident one of which being an FBI agent. ” The bell rang and Hopkins turned off the tv. Seeming only to have been half listening. Most of the students in the class only seemed to be half listening.

I however was shaking. I was terrified. What if it was Don? What if he was dead? Shot down in front of a bank. I swallowed the lump in my throat rising from my desk with the rest of my classmates. I sweeped by the teacher’s desk and rescued my blinders before heading into the hallway.

My next class didn’t seem at all important as I ducked into the bathroom and locked myself in a stall. I pulled out my phone and speed dialed my father’s number. He didn’t pick up. I tried again. More of the same. I tried Alan; he didn’t answer either nor did Charlie. I repeated Don, Alan, Charlie. No one would pick up their phone. After hearing my father’s voice mail for the fifth time. I pocketed my cell and grabbed my backpack.

The hallway was clear as the final class of the day had already started. I headed straight for the exit. I was going to catch a bus to Alan’s house and get some answers. I was stopped by a hand on my shoulder.

“Abby Calvin” the voice spoke. I turned to see none other than the school principal smiling down on me with a fake grin. “Skipping class are we?”

“Sir I was-”

He held up a hand “this is the third time in the last two weeks you’ve skipped a class. It’s not happening again, come on” he led me to the office.

The rest of my time at school was taken up by me being talked at by the principal. I tried to explain what was happening multiple times. He wouldn’t hear it and I was given a note for Don to read when I got home. My stomach churned as I imagined him shot to death in front of a bank. I quickly banned the image and beat my imagination into submission.

I tried each of the men I called family again twice on the bus before I was let off at the apartment building. I hurried up to my and Don’s apartment and let myself in. I threw my backpack on the couch and turned on the news grasping for any information that it might tell me.

As I sat watching the various unrelated news streams and casters talking about things I could care less about. I felt a sharp pain hit my head like a rock and with a blink I suddenly wasn’t sitting on the couch in Don’s living room.

I was crouched by a fire. I could hear the rain. People were talking all around me, there was music, laughing. Then there were shots. They echoed loudly in-

I stood and shook my head like it was wet. Pushing away the intrusive memory. I grabbed my binders out of my pocket putting them on and taking multiple deep breaths to try and calm down. I didn’t want to think about that. I didn’t want to think about her.

_________________ 3rd POV.

Don sighed sitting down on his desk and pinching the bridge of his nose. Tonight was not going well for him. His arm hurt and his head hurt. Worse he had just gotten back from talking to Agent McKnight's parents at their hotel. Nothing hurt worse than the look on McKnight’s mother's face when he told her what happened.

“I should be looking at mugshots, right?” Don voiced to Terry who was at her own desk nearby.

“Did you get a good look?” she inquired.

“Yeah, definitely” the man muttered in reply. Just then his phone rang. He pulled it out and glanced at the caller ID. It was Abby he was about to answer it.

“Agent Eppes.” Don turned to see the forensic scientist had appeared nearby. “That piece of evidence you found at the scene. We know what it is”

“Excellent” he told her and glanced back at his phone declining the call from his daughter and making a note to call her back once he got a chance. Then him and Terry followed the scientist down to her lab. ________________________ Don reached the door to his apartment and began digging for his keys with a sigh. This case had taken a major turn and it was really late. He wasn’t here to rest though he was here to pick up Abby and take her to his father’s house. Alan could watch over her while Don worked late at the office on this case. As he turned the knob of the door he grimaced at the shot of pain his arm gave him. Then he entered his apartment and heard the immediate stomping of feet running to the door.

“What the hell were you thinking!?”

It took the FBI agent a moment to register the unexpected outburst to be coming from his daughter. “What?” he asked, confused.

“You were getting shot at!” Abby yelled walking up to him. “It was all over the news! An agent was shot and another was dead and I didn’t know who was who because you wouldn’t pick up your goddamn cell phone!” she yelled.

Don thought back to all the times he had dismissed her calls that day. He hadn’t thought anything about it at the time. However now he realized how stupid it had been not to let her know he was alright. “I’m sorry Abby I-”

“You could have been dead for all I knew!” she cut him off “and where would that have left me? Huh?” Her voice broke.

“Abby I risk my life everyday” Don explained trying to keep his voice level and calming.

“I know but you can’t just act like I’m supposed to be okay with it or just leave me in the dark to suffer you unbelievable jerk” she shoved him harshly in her anger.

“Abby. Abby. Abby!” Don tried to get her attention to make her calm down as she whacked at his chest and struggled against him in anger.

“I already lost my mom, I can’t lose you to Dad!”

Both parties froze at her last outburst. The anger in Abby’s face faded as she realized what she had said. “You just called me Dad” Don muttered.

“No no I said Don” Abby objected.

“No you said Dad” Don countered a small smile threatening his face. Despite the circumstance it was the first time she had ever called him that.

“No I said Don” the girl muttered.

“You called me Dad” Don let off a light chuckle.

“Oh shut up you stupid sperm donor” Abby grumbled as he pulled her into a hug.

“Are you done yelling now?” he inquired. Abby nodded into his chest. “Then listen cause the truth is I’m sorry I should have told you I was alright rather than just leaving you in the dark. I just- I’m still figuring out this father thing alright. We both are and I’m sorry but risking my life and possibly getting shot at is my job” Abby squeezed him tighter “but I will make this promise to you though. For every moment I am alive I will be fighting to make it back here to you. Alright?”

“Alright” Abby nodded as they stepped apart. “Donald”

Don sighed “Dad things not staying huh?”

“I wouldn’t bet on it” Abby replied with a smirk that mirrored her fathers.

“And here I was actually liking the idea of being called Dad” Don murmured. They both chuckled lightly. _______________________ Abby POV.

Me and Don pulled up outside Gramp's house and loaded out of the truck. Alan came out to meet us near immediately with a look of concern clear on his face. “Donnie, you all right?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay. It’s fine- ow! Ow!” he exclaimed as his father touched his injured arm. “Look it’s just, my arm’s a little sore.” he addressed the blatant concern on Alan’s face. “I got a- a scrape during an incident.”

I rolled my eyes at the lame excuse coming over to their side of the driveway. “A scrape? From what?”

“Well, a bullet, if you have to know” Don muttered with a sarcasm very much like my own.

“A bullet oh my g-” Alan exclaimed immediately.

Don quickly spoke over him “but it’s not… dad, please listen to me, okay?Just relax. We had an arrest go bad, and we lost an agent, okay? And three people died”

“It was all over the news” I added “check your voicemail I left messages”

“My word” gramps breathed out in shock.

“Now I’m dropping this one off and looking for Charlie. Where is he?” Don questioned.

“He’s out in the garage with Larry.” the other man informed. “He’s upset. I can see why now.”

“What’s he doing in the garage?” Don asked, confused. I had to admit I was confused as well last I heard they only used the garage for storage and laundry.

“He’s just working on that problem. You know.” Alan spoke directly to Don. “the problem he can never solve.”

“The P vs. P thing?” Don inquired.

“Yeah, yeah, that’s the one.” gramps nodded.

“Aw man” Don groaned in aggravation. I got the sense there was more going on here than I was privy to.

“Wait do you mean P vs. NP?” I looked between the two men. “The millennium prize problem?”

Neither seemed to be listening to me as Don started trucking toward the house. “Where are you going?” Alan called after him.

“I got to talk to him.” the son replied “I need a new equation”

Alan seemed as though he wanted to say more but Don had already disappeared into the house. “What’s the problem with Charlie working on P vs. NP?” I asked.

Alan sighed and looked to the ground “It’s not Charlie working on the problem that’s well the problem Abby. It’s why” I thought on it for a moment but was still not sure what he was saying. “Come on” he finally spoke up. “I’m assuming you haven’t had any kind of dinner yet” I nodded and followed my grandfather inside. ________________ 3rd POV.

Don came storming into the kitchen from talking to Charlie. It was aggravating after everything that happened with McKnight and the shootings. Charlie should be motivated to stop these guys but instead he just such down. Don was a kind of frustrated that only his little brother could make him whether it was rational or not and he knew it.

“Are you okay?” Don turned to see Abby perched sitting cross legged on the kitchen island. She was eyeing him quizzically.

“Yeah” he answered immediately “no.” he answered honestly “been better” he finally decided to go with. Abby nodded and bit her lip in a way that for half second made Don feel like he was looking in a mirror before he brushed the thought away “what are you doing in here?”

“Thinking” the girl replied honestly holding up her blinders which the man could infer she had just removed. “Gramps and your partner Terry are in the living room. She’s nice. I thanked her for the books she got me for my birthday.”

Don nodded and let out a breath feeling his irritation slowly ebbing away “yeah I’ve known Terry for a long time”

“Really?” the girl inquired.

“Yeah about ten years. We met in the academy” he explained.

“FBI academy?” she quizzed further.

“Yeah” Don nodded and a small grin came to his face “what you think I learned all this on the streets. Trial by fire style?”

Abby laughed slightly. “Well I don’t know I’ve only known a real FBI agent for the upside of a month”

Don scoffed and looked to his shoes. “Yeah”

“Is Charlie helping with this bank robbing case still?” Abby inquired, glancing toward the backdoor through which Don supposed she must have been able to hear the shouting.

“Apparently not” Don grumbled. “All he wants to do is work on the stupid P vs. P thing he’s completely shut down.”

“I can’t really blame him for being worried” she stated “and neither can you Don. You could have died and Charlie’s the one who sent you to the bank where the shooting happened.”

Don sighed and looked at his daughter quizzically “yeah I know but like I told you it’s my job to get shot at and I can’t change that. The more he helps though the less likely it is for that to happen and he just doesn’t want to help”

Abby looked like she was about to respond when the door to the kitchen opened and Terry stepped in “hey Don sorry to interrupt but we have to get back to the office.”

“Yeah coming” the man replied to his partner. Then turned to his daughter “I’ll see you later kid”

“Bye Don” the girl replied.

Don nodded and followed Terry out of the kitchen. Thinking in the back of his mind that he really wished she would have said Dad. __________________ Abby POV.

I walked slowly down the stairs of the house heading for the living room. Two books in hand that I wanted to read. I was mildly preoccupied with my own thoughts to the point that I didn’t realize Charlie had returned from the garage until I was about to turn the corner. I paused out of sight of the two men in the living room as the younger spoke.

“Dad. I’ve been working on a problem.” he explained “P vs. NP, it can’t be solved.”

“I think you knew that when you started” Alan replied wisely flipping through his paper.

“I could work on it forever, constantly pushing forward, still never reaching an end.” Charlie admitted. I bit my lip realizing I shouldn’t be listening in on this conversation however my feet wouldn’t move from the place they had planted themselves.

“You know, sometimes you want to think that things don’t end.” gramps mused “but they do.”

“When mom was sick I couldn’t stop working on it.” Charlie’s voice was breaking and I felt something clench in my chest. I had gathered enough knowledge about Margaret Eppes, my grandmother, to know she had died of cancer about a year ago. None of them really talked about it in excess. It was still fresh in their minds. Like my mom’s death and the state of mourning it procured were still fresh in mine.

“Yeah. I know.” Alan spoke to Charlie gently. “I didn’t get it. Uh, not then. And your brother sure doesn’t understand why you spent the last three months of your mother’s life working on a math problem.” I shifted on my feet listening despite my growing urge to leave “But Charlie, you mother she understood why. Because she knew how your mind worked.”

I finally pried myself off the wall and left the house. I wandered through the yard to the garage. My mom knew how my mind worked to. Even though she couldn’t think like I did she always understood why I behaved like I did. She knew what was in my head. _~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_ 3rd POV.

Abby sat another book on her already read pile. Grabbing a new one from her, going to read pile. She had just opened the cover when there was a clearing of the throat from the entrance to the small nook she had claimed in the back of the library.

She looked up to see her mother standing there, arms crossed. “Busted huh?” The girl asked.

“Uh huh” the mom responded. Removing her purse from her shoulder she sat down across from her 14 year old on the floor. “I got another call from the school. You know most moms when their kid ditches don’t check the library first.”

“But you know better” Abby commented with a smirk.

“Yeah I do kid but you still have to stop skipping school even if it is to go read books” Janice stated.

“But the classes are pointless and boring” Abby objected. “They want to either put me in the need help classes because of my spotty elementary school education or in equally boring regular courses and then are shocked when I ace it all” Abby explained adamantly. “It’s patronizing”

Janice sighed “I know I asked again about the advanced courses but they are still sticking to their plan”

“If they’d just give me the chance I could show them” Abby muttered.

“You’re a brilliant girl Abbs one day people will see that” Janice reassured. “But you still have to go to school” Abby groaned “Hey, hey it’s not just about the school work maybe you could make some friends. You know you can’t hide in the library forever. Eventually you will run out of books. Especially at the rate you read”

Abby nodded “yeah I know. But people are well… people”

Janice smiled slightly “yeah they tend to be like that. What are you reading there?”

Abby glanced down at her book. “I don’t know haven’t started it yet”

Janice smiled “alright then you read I’m going to grab a computer and do some of my school work for my new online classes”

“Mrs. Wiat wasn’t kidding about homework never ending was she?” Abby commented as Janice got to her feet the woman chuckled lightly with her daughter. _~_~_~_~_~_~_~_ Abby POV.

I was sitting in the garage with my blinders on just absently thinking when I heard someone else walk in. I raised up the blinders to see it was Charlie. He plopped down in the chair nearby and grabbed his laptop.

After a moment he glanced up at me “Abby’s why are you sitting on the floor?”

I shrugged “it’s comfortable”

The man wasn't interested in discussing the topic. “So your millenium problem.” I gestured to all the boards around us. “Are you going to keep working on it?”

Charlie froze in the typing he had been doing. “I don’t know but, it can wait”

“And Don can’t” I finished his thought. Charlie nodded slightly and continued on his computer. I half wanted to talk to him about my mother for some reason. As I felt he might understand. I wanted to tell him that my mom got it too. However, I didn’t want to reveal that I had overheard him earlier, nor did I want to upset him. “The numbers are easy aren’t they?” I finally voiced after a moment “easier than people anyway. Answers to questions and a solid foundation. Easy to hide in.”

“Yeah” Charlie breathed in response and looked up at me “but we can’t hide in the numbers forever can we?”

“Nope” I muttered, popping the p. We were silent for a moment with the exception of Charlie’s mouse clicking.

Then Larry, Charlie’s friend and fellow CalSci professor, entered the garage. “Well,” he voiced upon his arrival, “I was heartened to hear that you’ve shifted your focus off P vs. NP.” he meandered further into the garage “So tell me what is it that I can help you with?”

“I failed” Charlie admitted and I snapped my attention back to him. “I failed to notice something significant. These robberies display certain highly eccentric characteristics.”

“Okay” Larry murmured, taking a seat on my other side a top some stuff “well how so?”

“Many were conducted in under two minutes, but in many cases,” Charlie explained “the perpetrators remained on the premises far longer despite having the money. Why would they wait around?”

“Don’t know.” the cosmologist replied “leaving quickly would seem to be the essential strategy when fleeing a felony.”

“Or any kind of crime” I added. “It’s risky cops could show up”

“You see this game, Larry? Abby?” Charlie pivoted his computer screen to show he had been playing Minesweeper. “You have to clear mines without blowing any up. Each time you’ve cleared a square, a numerical value is revealed. That number tells you exactly how many squares containing mines are directly adjacent to the square. This allows you to predict where the next mine will be located. And then the more boxes revealed, the more accurately one can predict the location of the mines.” he finished explaining the game and then continued with its relevance “the pattern used in these bank robberies is similar to this same type of problem-solving pattern. These robbers have used the banks they’ve been robbing to tell them which ones to rob next.”

“To what end would criminals be playing Minesweeper with banks?” Larry posed the same question rattling in my brain.

“I don’t know,” Charlie admitted.

“Are they using it to find high cash sums.” I suggested.

“No the takes varied, some as low as one hundred dollars.” Charlie objected thinking.

“Well then you’ll have to gather more information on your robbers” I pointed out “see what they’re after.”

“Information” Charlie murmured then quickly stood up closing his laptop with a snap. “I have to go.” with that he had dashed from the barn.

“It seems you’ve inspired him young Abigail,�� Larry sighed.

“Don’t call me Abigail please” I asked the professor “and I don’t know what I did to inspire him”

Larry made a humming noise as I got up from my seat on the floor. “Well does it matter how in the grand scheme of things really?” he asked philosophically. “Whether you meant to inspire him or not it is still the outcome” I nodded lightly in agreement. “So if not Abigail what would you prefer to be called?”

“Abby” I stated thinking it was rather obvious considering everyone else just called me Abby.

Larry let out another humming noise. “You know you are quite a unique being”

“Thanks” I murmured not sure where he was going with this.

“You have a mind such as your uncles but your traits portray your father in quite a respect for you only having known both for a month. A true statement of nature versus nurture” Larry observed “you are an enigma”

“Okay” I sighed “then call me the enigma”

Larry nodded and stood up “very well then” and with that he left the garage. I hoped he realized I wasn’t being serious. _______________ “Here you go, Pop.” Charlie called walking out of the kitchen with a bowl in his hands. “I got it.” he sat it down “now you got it.”

“Thank you,” Alan replied.

“Spoon” Charlie stated holding up the utensil.

I scoffed “I think he knows what a spoon is Uncle C”

My uncle gave me a look and messed up my hair with a small shove like gesture as he went to sit down next to me. He didn’t sit however as just then the main door opened. “Hello” my father called.

“Donnie!” Alan greeted getting to his feet. “Wow, it’s good to see you.”

“Oh, you guys ate. I’m starving” Don voiced coming into the dining room.

“Ah there’s plenty come on” Alan objected quickly.

“Yeah?” the agent clarified “did Terry call, tell you guys what happened?”

“Yeah, she said you arrested every suspect.” Charlie informed shuffling back toward the kitchen. “Only one shot fired, huh?”

“That’s impressive.” I mused “snipers are cool.” Don gave me a look as he made his way to the seat at the head of the table “sniper math is cool” I emphasized pointedly.

“One? How’d you pull that off?” Alan inquired.

“We knew roughly where’d they’d try to hit the next shipment,” Don explained as Charlie disappeared to get him some food. While I turned back to consuming mine. “And I knew they’d have an escape plan.”

“That’s very clever.” Gramps declared digging into his dinner.

“Out thinking the bad guys” I voiced “that’s got to be fun”

“Keep talking like that and someone might think you want to join the FBI” Don muttered giving me a look.

I shrugged and held up my hands in a defensive gesture “hey I don’t even know what I’m doing once I escape high school” I explained “don’t go pegging me to early”

“And I don’t think I can take two members of the family dodging bullets for a career” Alan voiced.

“Yeah well, I guess I was inspired by Mr. Heisenberg” Don continued as he went to grab a beer in the kitchen. “Just like Charlie here suggested”

“Heisenberg?” Alan gave Charlie a perplexed look. “You mean, the physicist?”

“Yeah” Don called in reply.

I chuckled lightly as Charlie took the seat next to me “Don goes to confront a bunch of crazy and armed bank robbers and your pep talk is about the movement of subatomic particles?”

“Yep” Charlie replied simply. Me and Alan exchanged an amused look. “It worked, didn’t it?”

“Yes” Alan replied. “I guess it did.” There was a moment as Don joined us at the table and we all turned to our food but Alan “I’m telling you,” he began “if your mother could see you two guys now, she would be… so happy” he voiced and turned to me “and Abby. She would have loved to have known you”

I smiled lightly as the brothers exchanged a look themselves. “How are you doing on your P vs. P thing?” Don inquired after a moment.

“NP?” Charlie corrected with an amused breath.

“Sorry” Don murmured.

“I’m not pursuing it anymore.” the mathematician declared.

“No?” the agent questioned.

“I got plenty of problems to work on,” Charlie explained “ones that I think I can actually solve.”

Don nodded “Glad to hear it.” The two clinked their glasses and Alan raised his. I grabbed my glass of water as well and we all knocked glasses in the center taking a sip. As normal table conversation resumed. I found myself smiling. I was among family.

Chapter 3 ->

#Don Eppes #Charlie Eppes #Alan Eppes #David Sinclair #Terry Lake #numb3rs #amita ramanujan #don's a dad #episode per chapter #This will be a series #also on ao3 #also on quotev #Abby Calvin

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rocksandrobots · 4 years

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Of Rocks and Robots Ch. 8 - The First Day of School

Today was the first day of school and Hiro had volunteered to show Varian around. Their other friends all had earlier classes and would join up with them later, but for now it was just the two boys.

While he had received a quick tour with Professor Granville last week, there were still more things that Hiro had to walk Varian through. Like, picking up his schedule, getting him his student ID, showing him where his individual classes were, and walking him through the ends and outs of campus life that only students knew or understood; such as the best places to study or which grumpy teacher to avoid.

"And this is the Quad." Hiro explained as they walked across a large open field towards a short bridge with a stream running underneath, "Students like to come out here and study or test their inventions. It's usually more crowded than it is. I guess ‘cause it's the summer semester. That’s the robotics building over there and this….this is the new exhibition hall."

Hiro’s voice became more hesitant as they stopped in front of a building with tall windows surrounded by a small pond that the stream ran into. As Varian surveyed the site, Hiro continued on, trying to ignore the bad memories that wanted to float to the top of his mind.

“Here you’ll present your final projects and such.”

Varian walked forward to get a better look, but stopped to peer at a marble block that stood in front of the building. There was an inscription carved into the stone and Hiro’s heart dropped as he knew what was coming next.

“The San Fransokyo Institute of Technology: Exhibition Hall. This building is dedicated to the memory of Tadashi Hamada, a true hero.” Varian read out-loud in a disquieted voice. He turned to look questioningly at Hiro.

Hiro heaved a heavy sigh and walked over to join his new friend, never taking his own eyes off of the memorial. He hadn’t had to recount how his brother had died before now. It was just common knowledge to anyone remotely familiar with the school. The event had made all of the local news channels at the time and Tadashi had become a legend among the faculty and student body. Hiro still heard hushed whispers from time to time from other classmates when he was around. They were the usual mix of pity and platitudes. He tried to ignore them as best as he could.

“There was a fire.” He said slowly, trying to find the words without crying. “Tadashi ran back in to try and save someone...he.. didn’t make it back out.” His voice shook at that last confession, but he somehow managed to keep his composure. He then waited for Varian to go through the usual motions most everyone did; the apologies, the prying questions, the trite aphorisms, the unhelpful but well meaning advice, and sometimes a ‘what can I do?” as if anything could be done.

But Varian didn’t do any of this. He simply stared at the block of stone as if deep in thought. Then after a while, still without looking at Hiro, he asked, “Did he save them?”

Hiro looked back at him surprised. He hadn’t expected that response. When he didn’t answer immediately, Varian finally met his eyes and then rephrased the question. “Did he save the person he went back in for?”

Hiro only stared back at the other boy, stunned. He tried to work his mouth but no sound would come out. How could he explain?

“No.” He eventually said “ Turns out they didn’t even need saving.” Hiro could have laughed at the irony of that statement if not for the stabbing pain in his chest.

“The guy he went back in to save, was the one who started the fire in the first place.” The bitterness in his voice hung in the air like a dead weight. Once again he waited for Varian to respond to this revelation, but the boy only turned back to looking at the marble inscription; his lower jaw jutted out in thought as his eyes scanned the words again.

The silence between the two of them was oppressive and Hiro found himself wanting to talk more just to make the awkwardness end. Yet now that he had started he also found that he didn’t want to stop either.

“The school holds a showcase every year for prospective students. I had entered with an invention of my own. I called them microbots. They were really, really small robots. Super tiny and you could control thousands of them at a time with a neurotransmitter.” Hiro explained as he personally recalled making them, with his brother’s help. The fondness of that memory gave way to resigned anger as he pressed on with his story.

“Professor Callaghan, the head of the robotic apartment here at SFIT, wanted them for himself. He staged the fire in order to steal them and faked his own death. When we first found out that they were stolen, the police wouldn’t believe us, so that’s when we created our super suits in order to stop him. Aaand we’ve just kept on superheroing since.” Hiro finished and silence fell between them once more.

“Why did he want the microbots?” Varian eventually asked, still not looking at him.

“He... wanted to use them to get revenge on Krei. He’s the guy who funded the Silent Sparrow project. Callaghan’s daughter was the original test pilot. She went through the portal, but never came back out. And he blamed Keri for sending her through.”

“Abigail.” Varian said and Hiro looked at him, once again in surprise.

“I read the project files you gave me.” He clarified.

“Oh, Yeah.” Hiro remembered. ”Well the good news is Baymax and I rescued her. So she’s back home now, safe.”

It was Varian’s turn to look at Hiro in surprise. “You mean after everything he did, you still helped him?” He asked in disbelief.

Now Hiro really hadn’t expected that question. He looked back at the other boy and he noticed a storm behind his piercing blue eyes. But what that meant, Hiro could only guess.

“Well, yeah, Abigail didn’t do anything wrong and she was the one in trouble,” Hiro paused and mulled over the question again. Then he took a deep breath and admitted a hard truth, more for himself than anything, “Also I didn’t want to wind-up like he did. I didn’t want anger and hate to make me forget who I really was and what’s really important.”

This time Hiro met Varian’s gaze with resolve, there was something consoling in just saying those words out loud. But Varian eyes darted back and forth as if trying to read Hiro’s face, at war with himself over what to say or do next. Finally he jerked his head back towards the memorial to stare at it once more, or rather to stare past it.

Hiro followed his gaze and also looked out at the newly rebuilt building. This time he allowed himself to remember things, not the tragic event itself, but small things, like setting up for his presentation, the cheers of congratulations from his friends when he told them he was accepted into the school, his final conversation with Tadashi on the bridge nearby, and the speech he had given a few weeks ago to commemorate it’s reopening and to honor his brother. That was when Varian interrupted his thoughts.

“What happened to Callaghan?” He questioned.

“He went to jail. There’s an official court date, sometime next year, but he’s already pleaded guilty so it’ll just be about giving him an actual sentence.” Hiro said with a sigh. He was not looking forward to standing before a judge and jury and having all of this dredged back up again. “I could never get through it, through any of this, if it wasn’t for Baymax, Aunt Cass, and my friends.”

“Yeah, I guess having friends would make things easier.” Varian agreed quietly and then went back to vaguely staring out into the middle distance, contemplating Hiro’s story. As for Hiro himself, he could only look at his shoes, unsure of what to say. Several awkward minutes passed with neither boy looking at each other or saying anything.

After some time, Hiro broke the silence first. “It’s almost lunchtime. How...how about I show you where the cafeteria is next?”

Varian finally looked at him and agreed. “Alright.” He said and made to follow him.

--------------------------

Varian mulled over everything Hiro had said as he followed the other boy back across the yard. He couldn’t imagine anyone being so noble. Hiro’s commitment to doing what he believed was right was humbling. Varian would have killed the man, had he been in Hiro’s shoes.

“I didn’t want to wind-up like he did.”

Varian’s stomach churned while recalling those words. Isn’t that actually what he had done though. Had he not hurt other people while seeking revenge against a rich and powerful foe? But what else was he to do? It wasn’t like he could bring the king to trial and have him sent to jail instead.

Varian wrestled with these questions and not for the first time. He had spent a whole year battling his rage, sadness, and guilt; his darker emotions always bubbling under the surface, threatening to spillover at any moment.

Sometimes Varian felt as if his cheery demeanor was just like a dam next to an ocean, made to hold back his more violent feelings, which constantly beat against the crumbling structure. Any leak or rupture could bring the whole thing tumbling down and he’d be swept away in a sea of his own hate. Along with anyone else caught in his path.

In truth this frightened him. But he knew nothing else other than to keep up the facade. So he slapped on a cheerful smile as he entered the cafeteria.

--------------------------

The cafeteria was far more busy than the courtyard had been. Students milled about everywhere, eating and talking. The two boys got in line to order food.

Hiro was just deciding on what he should get, and annoying a very grouchy looking lunch-lady while at it, when he heard someone yell his name out.

"Hiro!" A taller girl, wearing a turtleneck and with long brown hair tied up in a ponytail, was waving frantically at him as she made her way over to them.

"Karmi?" Hiro's disbelief quickly turned to joy when realization struck him. "Karmi!" He yelled and ran to scoop the woman into a hug. The forcefulness of which sent them both spinning and laughing in exuberance.

When they finally untangled themselves Hiro asked, "What, what are you doing here? I thought your parents sent you away."

"Well, we spent the past two months arguing about it. I didn't want to go. So they agreed that I could come back for the next semester." she smiled and then explained, "I just have to call, like everyday, and go home every other weekend. Also no more internships." She said this last bit sadly. Last term she had been kidnapped and experimented on by the lady she was interning for. Hiro had managed to rescue her, but her parents had unrolled her and took her back upstate to where they lived.

"Well, I'm glad you're back," Hiro gave her a warm smile and she returned it. "Oh, I almost forgot. This is Varian." He said while turning to his new friend, "He's just moved here from Europe."

Varian walked over to meet them and Hiro continued with the introductions. "Varian, this is my friend Karmi. She's one of the younger students here at SFIT, like us."

“Hi” He said and held out his hand for Karmi to shake.

“Oh! So you got into college early too?”Karmi excitedly exclaimed while vigorously shaking his hand. “Are you Hiro’s age?”

“I’m sixteen.” He answered.

“So am I! Well, actually, I’ll be seventeen in a few months but, still it’s nice to finally meet someone here who is my age. What are you majoring in?”

Varian looked back down at the schedule he was holding,”Uhh... Applied Physics and Engineering.” He read out-loud. Apparently alchemy wasn’t a major he could study here, and Professor Granville had told him that this was the best one for what he was trying to achieve.

“So you’re a physicist. I’m going for a Biotech degree. I want to become a microbiologist and right now I’m studying viruses to try and create a new vaccine.” She eagerly explained her ongoing research.

Varian took a moment to absorb this information, some of the words she used were new to him, but he did understand that vaccines were a type of medicine. “So you’re studying to become a physician?” He asked, putting what she had said into a context that he knew.

Karmi nodded yes and embolden, Varian tried to use some of the new vernacular he had been learning. “That’s, what’s the word, cold? My mother was a medic.” He added trying to find a point of connection in order to keep the conversation going. But Karmi only looked at him in confusion.

“Cold?” She said.

“I think you mean ‘cool’.” Hiro chimed in.

“Oh, right.” Varian realized his mistake, “Sorry I’m still getting used to the slang here.” He chuckled nervously and rubbed the back of his head.

“Oh, that’s right. Hiro said you were from Europe. What language do you usually speak?” She asked.

“Oh lots.” He replied, happy to brag about something he did know. “English, German, Russian, Latin, Italian…”

He was listing off all the ones he knew, or at least could read, if not speak, when Karmi interrupted him excitedly.

“Do you speak French?” She blurted out.

“Oui.” He returned in French and they both started to giggle.

Hiro looked back and forth between the two of them, unable to figure out what was so funny. He had been watching their ongoing conversation with a growing unease. He was beginning to feel left out and a twinge of jealousy started to cloud his thoughts. Though if you had asked him, he couldn’t have told you why. He should have been happy that his friends were getting along, shouldn’t he?

“Oh, do you two wanna sit with me at lunch?” She asked, never looking away from Varian.

Hiro found himself sliding between the two of them trying to get into Karmi's line of sight, if only to get her to stop looking at the other boy for just a moment.

“No. Sorry, but we gotta go?” He said, his voice going high like it always did when he lied or made an excuse.

“But I thought we came over here just to eat?” Varian asked in confusion and Hiro’s mind began to race. What was he doing? Why had he said that? How could he get out of this situation and keep Karmi from talking to Varian anymore? And why did he even care?

“Uh.. we did...but I just remembered thaaaat...I hadn’t shown you the lab you will be working in. We wanna get there and get you set up before the other students come in and , uh… hog all the … tools.” Hiro cringed. It was the lamest excuse he’d ever given. Oh, why did he have to be so bad at lying?

Varian and Karmi only exchanged questioning looks at one another and shrugged.

“Okay, just let me grab an apple to go.” Varian agreed and turned back to the line.

“You, go do that.” Hiro said in a strained but relieved voice. He then turned to Karmi who was giving him a worried look.

“Is everything ok?” She asked.

“It’s fine.” His voice squeaked. He then let out a heavy sigh and added, “Look, I’m really glad you’re back. I’ll see you around?”

“Yeah,” She agreed and gave him a soft smile. Varian walked over to join them again, having procured his apple, when Karmi waved goodbye to them both.

--------------------------

Hiro stormed ahead down the hall, his hands in his pockets and his eyes lowered to the ground. He was still embarrassed and angry at himself over the incident in the cafeteria and didn’t really feel like talking. Varian tagged along blithely, munching on his apple. If the other boy had noticed Hiro’s mood he made no show of it. This only made Hiro’s resentment grow, which in turn only made him even more confused about his feelings.

“You know what?” Varian asked cheerfully as he took another bite of his apple.

“No, what?” Hiro responded deadpan, not looking at him as he read the numbers on the doors as they passed by them.

“I read online that there are over three hundred varieties of apples sold in America.” He said and Hiro stopped to look at him confused. What did apples have to do with anything?

“I wanna see if I can buy one of each and take them back home with me.” Varian said with a sly smile. “It would explode Dad’s mind. He’d be so happy!”

“Explode? You mean, ‘blow his mind.” Hiro corrected.

“Yeah, that’s what I said.” Varian took another bite, seeming to ignore his blunder, and then flashed Hiro a winning smile.

Hiro could only laugh at the ridiculousness of it all, which apparently was the reaction Varian had been hoping for, and they both broke down snickering.

“Can you imagine? Just a pile of apples taller than my dad, and he’s a pretty tall guy.” Varian said, holding his hand high above his head indicating his father’s height.

“Yeah, he’ll cry with joy.” Hiro agreed through his laughter, and just like that all of his previous anger just melted away and he couldn’t even remember why he had been upset at the guy.

“Oh, this is it,” Hiro stopped and pointed to a door up ahead. As they walked towards it he continued, “This is the communal lab you’ll be working in. Granville made sure to give you one to share with Wasabi and the others. That way there’ll be people that you know around who you can ask for help if you need it.”

He opened the door and Varian walked past him to explore the large room. He spun around once and then turned back to Hiro.

“Will you be working here too?” He asked.

“Uh, sometimes, but I have my own lab in the robotics building.” Hiro explained. “They give out private labs to students who prove themselves, as like, a reward or something. I didn’t really do anything to earn one, myself, I just got Tadashi’s old lab. I guess Granville didn’t have the heart to clean it out and give it to someone else.”

He recalled finding Tadashi’s old baseball cap in the office, and sadly looked out into the middle distance for a moment. When he came back to the present, he found Varian frowning at him in worry so he sprung back with a smile and joke.

“If you thought living with Wasabi was a chore, just wait till you have to work with him.”

This sent both boys laughing again, knowing how fastidious their friend could be.

--------------------------

Behind the two boys loomed a shadow, the owner of which was hidden away in even more shadow. As they laughed, ignorant of the danger they were in, their stalker paused and looked on. It would be so easy, the villain thought, so easy to attack now and rid the world of these two meddlesome pests while they were both alone, unarmed, and unaware of who was after them. But that could upset the balance. There was a needed timing to these things, one couldn’t rush the future, and if there was anything that the occupant in the shadows knew, it was patience.

#of rocks and robots #varian #Hiro Hamada #karmi #tangled #tangled the series #tts #rapunzel's tangled adventure #rta #BH6 the series #bh6 #big hero 6 #big hero six

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quokkalatte · 4 years

Text

I havent posted on here for awhile but I wanted to talk ab something that's been on my mind recently and I've been dwelling on it a lot lately. And it comes to supporting a friend, when they tell you they have a crush on someone.

When your friend approaches you, whether it be through text, face time, or face to face, and they tell you that they have a crush on someone, you want to be supportive right? You want to tell them "ooo ask them out then!" Or something along those lines. And if they get nervous about it, and are scared that their crush will reject them, do not say "what's the worst that could happen? Theyll reject you?"

Becuase yes. Rejection IS a worst case scenario. It might not seem big. Your crush not liking you back, so you pick yourself up and move on. Or at least that's how some people would view it. But the thing is, if you dont know a person's history when it comes to romantic interest, saying something like that can be damaging.

As I've grown up, and developed crushes on people, and when I would confide in friends, that's normally how the conversation would go. They get giddy and excited, and tell me I should ask them out. And that was okay, but over time, it wasnt. Because every. Single. Time. I would get rejected. My first crush on a boy was in elementary school. And ever since two months ago, every time I told a boy I liked them, they would reject me, often in a cruel manner.

When a freind of mine would say "the worst they can do is reject you" I would get this feeling in my stomach, and I would always think "exactly. That's the exact WORST thing that could happen. Becuase rejection hurts, and it affects others differently.

There are those who can just pick themselves up and move on. No harm no foul. But for people like me, those experiences stick to you and morph you.

Hitting Middle school, the rejection got worse. I had three small crushes in the span of three years. And every single one had found out. When I told them, they looked at me funny, and would leave to their group of freinds. And they would tease me. And laugh at me becuase I was different. I wasnt the skinny pretty little girls like the others in my class. And it was around that time I'd realised that. After the first two, there was a third. This experience is probably where alot of my issues resolved. And it was only 6th grade.

I didnt even tell him that I'd liked him, a classmate found out and told him during recess. We were waiting in line to go back inside for class, and the school I went to we had uniforms. Mine always fir tightly becuase I was bigger than most of the girls in my class. I remember I was wearing my favorite blue jacket and the khaki pants we were required to wear. When the classmate ran over to the boy I'd liked, he'd pointed at me and told him. The boy turned and looked at me, and got the most disgusted look on his face, and shouted "EW!" Before walking away. I proceeded to get upset. The classmate approached me, and in a pitting manner told me he didnt think that my crush would react that way. The girls I were freinds with said horrid things about the boy I'd liked, but the only thing that I could think of was the look of disgust on his face at the simple thought that I'd had a crush on him.

And it stuck with me. It still does. Containing through high school I became more reserved when it came to the guys I liked. I never told my friends who my crushes were, and when they outed me about it, that's all they wanted for me to do was to tell him. Tell him becuase what's the worst that could happen? He could reject me?? Yes. Becuase in my mind, I was ugly. I was undeserved of every having a boyfriend. And I was convinced I would never have one. I would look in the mirror and loath what I saw. I hated how I looked becuase all I could see were what they saw. I wore hoodies all the time even in hot weather so that I could cover my arms. I didnt want any of me showing. I wouldnt wear shorts becuase I hated how big my legs were. I held so much self loathing for myself, I wouldnt look in a mirror for longer than I had to.

That had gone on for years. I've hated myself for years becuase of judgment. Because I feared what people thought of me. It didnt just extend to what I thought the boys thought, but everyone thought. I hated attention being attracted to me, and my social anxiety got worse. Anything that brought attention to me would make my heart pound and my palms sweaty and my head buzzing with a hundred thoughts that made it so difficult to function.

It was only recently in the past couple years I've been able to accept myself. And I'm still very far off. And it might sound dumb or cliche, but the only reason that sparked this, was kpop. My friend introduced me to BTS, and I got invested in them. I loved them. I loved these 7 boys, who radiated such happiness and positivity. Their concept of loving yourself for who you are, and that the closest to you would do the same, those words meant alot to me. They helped me when I was anxious. Their music was, and still is, so soothing to me.

In my Senior year of high school I was taking my health elective, and we were learning about the BMI and to test what ours was. I refuse to share what my results were, but they werent healthy. As the teacher droned on about the topic, I sat in the back of the class quietly crying and trying to get myself to stop but I couldnt, and I felt a panic attack coming on, and I was scared that I would bring attention to myself, so I needed to distract myself from it, and I plugged my earbuds in and pulled up a BTS video. It was just a 2 minute video of Jimin laughing, and that was enough. I calmed down enough to collect myself, and I stopped crying.

Two years later I'm still not perfect. I still have a very toxic mentality of myself, and I can accept that I might need help, more than what KPOP groups can give me. They did give me the tiniest of nudges to help me, and I am very grateful.

I've told you what you shouldnt say to someone when they tell you that they have a crush on someone, so here's what you COULD say.

Your friend is worried, that their crush might reject them. You can offer your support.

"I'm here for you. I hope it works out, and I'm sure it will. And if not, I'll be here to help you"

"I understand you're scared, I see why you are. You dont have to tell them unless you're ready. I'm in your corner if you need me"

Motivate your friend in a good way. Dont pressure them into it, becuase it can make them anxious and stressed because they feel like they HAVE to tell their crush, and it makes it worse on them. Encourage your freind to get to know their crush. Tiny things, speaking to them. And if their scared about that, reassurance will help them. Offering advice and tips on what they could say and do will help them.

This is my last personal story to pair with this. I developed a crush on a guy. We met through a mutual freind, one who happens to be a very good friend of mine. I got his snapchat, and since then we've talked every day since. I didnt realise that I'd had feeling for him until a month into just chatting, and I started to wonder if he felt the same. The select few people i told all told me that it was possible, and they believed that all the signs he gave me were pointing towards yes, he did like me. I was still unsure, so very unsure.

My best friend is who helped me the most. I told him about a week after I found out my crush on this boy, and he was immediately supportive. He never once said to me "worst case scenario he rejects you". He told me o should talk to him more, get to know this boy and see what happened. My feelings became stronger every passing day. This boy made me so happy, and he was unlike any of my past crushes. I was so used to the guys I liked wanted nothing to do with me, or if they actually DID, it wasnt becuase of me, but because they wanted nudes. The few experiences I'd had with guys before this boy were awful. I had been talking to a guy but all he cared about was sex and nothing else and ignored me for a month, and then proceeded to ask for nudes becuase he was horny. It was very damaging for my mental state, and I was in a rough place. Id cried to my best freind, begging for him to tell me what was wrong with me. Why boys didnt reciprocate my feelings, and when they showed even the slightest of interest it was because they were horny. I felt like I would never find anyone ever.

I was scared, after developing feeling on this boy. I told my freind the same stories I've shared here. How I was terrified of being rejected. Becuase I'd gotten to know this boy and felt more for him than what freinds normally would. My best friend was so supportive, he stood by me when I would get anxious and when I would tell him my fears and doubts.

It took me 3 weeks to gett the courage to tell this boy that I liked him. The day I told him my nerves were shot, my palms were slick, but I did it. I confessed to this boy that I liked him. Funny enough, it was through a meme. It said that "I might have a big fat crush on you but I'm scared to say anything" my nerves were on fire my body was numb. It might sound like an exaggeration but this was how I was feeling. I was texting all three of my supportive freinds at once. My best freind was the first to know, he was with me through the entire time I talked to my crush. My crush had asked why I was scared to tell him, and I'd told him that I didn't want to make him uncomfortable becusse we'd grown close in the time we were talking. He reassured me that I couldnt make him uncomfortable. I'd asked how he felt about me. At this point my heart was in my throat. I watched the icon that showed he was typing and I was ready, I was ready for him to reject me, like all the boys had done before.

But he told me he felt the same. He didnt reject me. He was worried becuase we live so far apart from each other, and we werent sure how long distance would do for us, and how Covid19 would take into play. But I'd said I was up to try if he was, and he was too.

That was two months ago as of writing this. But if it wasnt for my best friend being so supportive of me, I dont think I could ever have told my boyfriend that I liked him. Even now, the concept is foreign to me. My trauma is still apparent becuase I cannot fathom how someone as amazing as him likes me back, after years of getting rejected and my mental health being damaged by the countless teasing. The first time he called me beautiful, I broke down and cried, because it felt too good to be true.

I'm sharing this, I'm sharing my experiences becuase i wanted to help people know how they could help a friend who might share similar experiences with me, get through the fear of rejection. Telling someone their worst case scenario doesnt help ease their worries. But offering your support, and reassuring them that it would be okay and that you will be there for them will.

Rejection is a part of life, and its something you cannot really control. But if the right words can help you get over your fear of it, then it does help ease the pain.

I'm not saying that all my past friends who told me rejection was my worst case scenario were trying to be malicious, they just wanted me to be happy and were excited for me. I understand that.

And if you ever were that friend who said that, it doesnt make you a bad friend. You were trying to help in your own way. But this may help for future interactions, or at least I hope it will.

You dont always know the experiences that your freinds go through, but being there and supporting them through their fears will help them, and give then confidence.

My best freind has supported me through so much, and it was him who helped me overcome one of my biggest fears.

I hope you found this extremely long PSA to be helpful and I hope I explained myself the best I could. If something is unclear to you please tell me I want to help everyone I can, because I beleive you all deserve to be happy.

And no of course you dont need a partner to be happy. You can be strong and independent in your own way and find your happiness there.

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szopenhauer · 4 years

Text

Would you ever chew gum after someone else already has? noooo, yuk

Earrings or a necklace? necklace

Have you ever wished on 11:11? I do smth else/have different tradition

Have you ever listened to the Goo Goo Dolls? Iris, even recently

Have you ever watched Lost? nah

Do you have pictures of your exes? I think I deleted them

Do you have Ozzy Osbourne on your mp3 player? I don’t listen to him but I liked to watch Osbourne’s family tho

Do you read romance novels? the only one I could count as a romance was Five feet apart

Did you draw pictures for your crushes in preschool? no :o

Have you ever not asked someone out cause you were scared of rejection? yep

Have you ever liked someone just because of their appearance? had some crushes like this, especially celebs lol

Pink or green? green but pink with green looks interesting

A bracelet or a ring? depends

Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter? LOTR

By airplane or bus? bus

What’s the last thing you binge watched? She-ra

Do you watch youtube videos or tv shows more? yt videos

What are you tired of right now? everything

Have you ever gotten rid of something and then regretted it? If so, what? several things, personal

How does your stomach feel right now? silence before the storm?...

Do you live in an apartment that has inspections? I don’t live in an apartment

Do you hate taking naps during the day? yes and no

Who in your immediate family has the best natural hair? my grandma has, she never got grey hair nor dandruff etc.

Do you know anyone who thinks they’re more talented than they are? obvi

What is the origin of your last name? polish?

Have you ever been inside a Victorian mansion? I wish

What was the most boring field trip you ever went on? hmm...

What are your favorite types of videos to watch on youtube? music videos, thrift hauls, interiors, fashion, funny stuff...

What’s a DIY craft project you want to try? I’m not into DIY

Are you a hoarder? yep

Do you ever call yourself stupid in your head? often

If you were to start a collection, what would it be? not counting those I already have? for example - znicze

Would you ever give your daughter the middle name Marie? I could, especially if it was a boy :P as it’s legal to call him Maria if it’s the middle name lmfao

Do you have a relationship with God? some sort of it

Have you ever “fired” a doctor? could say so

Who is the prettiest Asian youtuber that you can think of? I don’t watch any Asian youtubers

What was the temperature where you live today? less than 30 Celsius but it felt colder

Is your sleep schedule all messed up? umm...

Did you wear green last St. Patrick’s Day? I don’t celebrate this

Food: Are you adventurous or do you stick to what you know? stick

Do you know both of your biological parents? I do

When was the last time you wrote so much your finger ached? last night

Do you store a lot of pictures you’ve taken that no one else has seen? ppl close to me saw them

When did you first start using the internet? regularly or very first time?

Do you prefer tents or staying in hotels? prefer hotels

Do you have any family traditions for certain holidays? Which? personal

Do you enjoy clowns / street performers or are they creepy to you? some I like

Have you ever had a teacher who would just babble about nothing? for example - we had a priest who was always talking about war times or his night dreams :D

Do you ever look at a word and think that it looks odd? hahaha it happens

Did you ever dream about being an animal? plenty

Which vowel occurs most in your whole name? A

What’s your favourite colour on a dog? dunno

Do you prefer Skirts or Dresses? dresses, I can use them as tunics

Have you ever been told you are fake? once :(

Can you do cartwheels? not well

Do you like the name Sara? no longer...

What’s your first name without an r, e, s or l? doesn’t change

What’s your age plus two divided by 4? 7.5

Do you know someone named after a month (April, May, June)? used to know May

Stop typing. What do you hear? someone is mowing grass as every other day ugh...

What was the last book you read that also is a film? Five feet apart

How often do you get a new purse or a new wallet? whenever I feel like it but I thrift them so it’s not like I spend lots of money

What is the most money that you have ever spent on getting your nails done? few PLN for a nail polish and done them myself lol

Does it matter to you if your girlfriend drinks? I wouldn’t date an alcoholic, someone who is drunk a lot and then do stupid stuff, pukes, have hangovers often, spend all their money on alcohol, smells like it, gross!

Has a little kid ever fallen asleep on your lap before? nah, just cat

If you heard your best friend’s significant other was cheating on them, would you tell them? Even if you couldn’t prove it? I’d mention that to them

Do you plan on having both your parents at your wedding? if they want to attend...

Have you ever stayed on a ride at a theme park to ride it again? nope

Where did your mother and father meet for the first time? in front of the church

Would you rather read books or magazines? depends

Have you ever had your cheek pinched? I hate that >.>

Do you own any plaid pants? I have a pair of plaid leggings and pajamas

Do you talk in your sleep? nah

Have you ever fallen off a horse? never been on a horse to fall

Can you pick things up with your toes? I do this often

If you are a girl, do you get bad PMS, or is it not so bad? my PMS were usually worse than my period

Would you rather have your shirt be too long or too short? too long

Are you the type of person who can shake insults off easily, or do they tend to stick around in your brain & bother you? stay forever

Do you like clothes with ruffles on them? usually not

Were you happy when you woke up today? I wasn’t

Have you used the opposite sex’s bathroom in a public place before? had to

Do you rent movies frequently? I don’t have money for that

Do you quote movies or songs to answer survey questions? very rarely as it’s annoying

What is your name spelled backwards? Annazuz :3

How do you think the world will end? people will destroy it?

An alien ship lands at your house, and they want you. Do you go with them?

If you were in a horror flick, would you be one of the first ones to die? I think I would survive or die saving someone

What movie has been taken WAY too far, as far as sequels go? most of them but it’s more shows’ thingy

Do you get a fake Christmas tree each year, or a real one? fake, I’m against using real ones

How long would you have to know someone before tying the knot? it’s not about length of time that much

Would you embarass yourself if you met your favorite celebrity? probably :x

If a person had a glass eye, would that scare you? no idea, hope not as I don’t wanna make them feel bad, sorry in advance

Are you a twin? am not

Do you get paranoid that someone’s looking at your through your window? my neighbor sometimes does so...

Mountains, oceans, or forests? forests

When was the last time you “de-haired” your hairbrush? recently?

Are any of your great grandparents still alive? they’re all dead

Where’s your significant other? visiting her dad

How much blankets do you sleep under? 1-2

Is a hair dryer a necessity for you? it is

If you were atop a tall building, would you throw stuff at people below? don’t do that!

Do you believe we really landed on the moon? I don’t give a shit

Name a movie everyone else thought was funny, but you couldn’t stand: majority of comedies tbh

What topping do you HATE on pizzas? same, I’m more into simple food

Got any interesting wigs? bunch

Can you resist temptation? most often

Would a credit card get you into trouble? if I lost it, I would be paranoid about it 24/7, omg I just got scared I’ve lost my ID and bus card

Truth or dare? truth?

Which is more annoying: sequels or prequels? *shrug*

Do you use rechargeable batteries? when I did they were blowing up, didn’t charge back or smth like this so I prefer normal ones thank you very much

Describe the chair you’re sitting in. Is it comfy? it's so old there’s barely anything left to sit on but I have no cash for a new one nor can get that kind of chair anywhere so... 2 pillows under my butt have to be enough

What would you do if you thought someone was following you? try to lose them

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timetoresurface · 5 years

Text

Dream Glow / JJK (1)

a steady radiance of light or heat

Word: Listening to Dream Glow by BTS and Charli XCX gave me a new dose of inspiration. This is what I came up with after weeks of radio silence. Pairing: Y/N x Jungkook Genre: Romance, as I’m a hopeless romantic, best friend idol au Warnings: nothing really, maybe a bit angsty covered in fluff Word count: 5K Summary: You’re just trying to make it though the day with Jungkook being your best friend. Distance and personal issues make it hard to maintain this friendship but you are both dedicated. The day Jungkook admits to like someone is the day you start to realize how much you actually like that stupid boy. What should you do?

Everything you are is average. You work an ordinary job filled with normal people trying to make it through the day. The apartment you live in is a regular home for a city person. The daily routine of your life was a simple comfort blanket, something to shield you from all the risks you hadn’t taken. You were happy, or at least you made yourself believe you were. You were satisfied with a simple life because you had chosen to settle for the ordinary.

“Y/N!” Your boss yelled through the office making everyone feel insecure and scared. You however were used by your boss’s rude behavior. What did he need this time? And why did he have to scream for attention when you were almost finished with your project?

“You called for me sir?” You asked while entering his office. The room was painted in a dull grey and was filled with dark furniture. The only splash of color were the plants that were scattered through his office. You took quite an interest in his plants as you were the only one watering them. You were the only one that cared as your boss never liked the smelly green things his wife had given him throughout the years.

“Have you already finished the report about the returning customers?” He asked you with despair in his voice. He probably had a fight with his wife or something because he usually wasn’t the desperate kind of man.

“I was just finishing up. I can send it to you in half an hour if you’d like.” You politely answered his question with fake politeness.

“That would be perfect.” He gestured for you to leave his office and you gladly exited. This was a weekly routine and you weren’t as scared as you had been before. Your boss is just someone who likes perfection and as long as you deliver something close to excellence he would leave you to do your job.

You handed him the report when it was finished. You had lunch with two of your colleagues you could kind of call your friends. Afterwards you cleaned your inbox starting with the more urgent ones before calling it a day. There wasn’t any adventure in your daily routine, it mostly was just you trying to make it through the day without crying.

“See you tomorrow Y/N.” One of your colleagues said while speed walking through the rain, she had forgotten her umbrella and tried to avoid the droplets by zigzagging.

“Bye.” You said while opening your umbrella. The walk back to your place was only a ten minute walk. Something you loved about your job as it was the only time of the day where you could clear your thoughts. Nothing satisfies you more than walking through the busy city streets with a good soundtrack playing in the background. The most adventure you got in your day were these ten minutes where you tried not to get hit by cars and ignored people’s rude remarks when you walked too slow.

Your thoughts were interrupted by your cellphone loudly playing stressed out by Twenty One Pilots. Who dares to interrupt your only ten minutes of freedom?

“Y/N speaking?” You didn’t look at the caller ID thinking it wouldn’t be someone important. The only meaningful person in your life was always traveling the world and barely had time to call you every other week.

“Y/N it is me! Did you delete my number?” The caller’s voice yelled from the other side of the line. All annoyance disappeared as soon as you heard his melodic voice.

“Jungkook!” You exclaimed. “No, I would never delete your number, you know that.” A smile found its way to your face and you couldn’t even remember the last time your muscles were found in this position. The last time you smiled this big was probably the last time Jungkook had called you.

“Lately I’m not so sure Y/N. I’m always the one calling and making sure our friendship keeps on existing.” You could hear the little pout through his voice. Always a baby.

“You’re always busy when I call. I can literally drop everything when you’re calling. I mean you can’t stop singing in the middle of a show just to talk to me.” It was a stupid excuse but it was the one you were going to hide behind.

“I would though.” He whispered but you barely heard him over the buzz in the background.

“Where are you? It is so noisy.” You asked him genuinely interested in his whereabouts.

“Backstage at some award show.” Was his vague answer. Sometimes it was really difficult to keep up a good satisfying conversation with him.

“Oh. Did you win anything?” You tried to poke him again to receive more than just some lazy answer he would give to his mom.

“Yes, we just came back from the acceptance speech. It was great.” He sounded happy but also tired. They probably still have to perform as they’re the biggest act at the moment. And they like to keep the best for last.

“I’m proud of you Jungkook.” And you meant it. You had met Jungkook while he was already in BTS, the early stages, at school. He wasn’t always in class as he had to practice and perform but when he was present he immediately caught your eye. Maybe you had wanted something more than friendship at the time but you settled to just be his friend. You were selfish, you knew that, you just wanted him in your life. Also you were both sixteen at the time, who was ready for something as serious as a relationship. Definitely not you.

“Y/N, tomorrow we’ll be flying home. Wait for me at our dorms?” His question was so innocent. He just wanted someone familiar to hug while arriving back home before the shit storm of practice starts again.

“Send me your schedule and I’ll be there when you arrive.” You accepted his offer even if you had to call in sick at work.

“Okay great. See you in a bit.”

“See you.” With you saying the last words the call had ended. Your friendship with Jungkook had been the most important thing in your life for the past year. He didn’t know that and you kind of wanted to keep it that way. He doesn’t need to know you hated your job and he most definitely doesn’t need to find out about your zero friends. You hadn’t always been such a mood killer but the past two years everything had changed and somehow you ended up as an old single lady complaining about everything. Except when you were with Jungkook or the other members of BTS. You were always at your best behavior when you were with them, reminding yourself of who you used to be before you had turned into the old screaming neighborhood lady with a thousand cats. Even though you had not one cat as your building forbade you to have pets, the bastards.

## flashback ##

You were busy taking all your books out of your backpack when the teacher called for your attention. A new boy was enrolling in your class and he was a trainee, a wannabe idol. There were a few others in your class who were trainee’s and you could immediately tell they were never going to make it. They just didn’t have the special cuteness you needed to become a well respected idol. You were still setting up your desk when the teacher introduced the new boy. You didn’t need to look at him to know he was just another wannabe trying to become something bigger than the stars had planned out for him.

“I’m Jungkook. Hello.” He awkwardly said with a voice as clear as crystal. You head instantly snapped up to look at the new boy and for the first time you saw someone close to resemble a future idol. He could if he wanted to, but his shy behavior might be mistaken for someone who didn’t really want to do anything but hide.

“You can sit next to Y/N.” The teacher said while gesturing toward you. Jungkook didn’t seem too pleased when he followed the teachers finger but you were excited. Never had you seen someone so innocent and intriguing. Maybe it were your teenage hormones finally acting up or maybe it was fate. Who could tell?

The first few weeks he was there every single day but you still hadn’t said a word to him. You secretly admired him from afar and wondered if he had gotten any sleep that night. You weren’t the only one intrigued by the new boy but he didn’t seem to care. He had made one friend, another trainee, and didn’t even try to contact anyone else. The day you had finally found all your courage to go and talk to him, he wasn’t there. And he was gone for a week before he got back to school with his ears pierced and his hair dyed another color. All your courage had disappeared and you were back at admiring him from a distance. Noticing little things like him always trying to hide his laugh even though it was the most beautiful sound you had ever heard.

Months went by and your obsession with the boy had started to die out as your favorite artist had released a new song. Maybe it were the Gods playing tricks on you but the moment you started to lose him in a crowd they pushed him right back into your lap.

“Please take a number and the person who has the same number will be your partner during this project.” Your teacher said while walking through the room so everyone could pick a number. Some tried to cheat and others were trying to change numbers with someone else trying to bribe them with little things. You noticed Jungkook’s number before you checked yours. He had a big nine written on a paper and you had the same nine on yours.

“Y/N can you maybe change numbers? I really want to be paired up with Jungkook.” Some girl in your class whispered into your ear. It was one of those girls who wore make-up even though it was strictly forbidden by school rules. Somehow the teachers didn’t notice her young features highlighted with mascara and lipstick.

“Y/N you also have a nine right?” Jungkook came to your rescue and for the first time your eyes locked. Slowly you nodded your head and you both agreed later on this was the moment your friendship had officially started.

## end flashback ##

Luckily for your boss Jungkook arrived late at night which meant you could spend your Friday at work. Unluckily for you, Jungkook had to arrive past nine PM making you go to your desk and sit through boring mails and phone calls. He had send you a couple of texts throughout the day and your colleagues noticed your different behavior.

“It is strange to see you smile during office hours.” Someone had said.

“Maybe she has a date tonight? She looks extremely good today.” You heard someone whisper to another colleague. You didn’t care for their words as the only thing that mattered was you and Jungkook reuniting after months of separation. You had also checked out his schedule and he was staying for over a month which meant a month of happiness and endless cuddles.

“Y/N can you finish this off for me? I need to go pick up my mom from the hospital.” One of your closest co-workers asked. You didn’t really belief her as her outfit screamed more date night than hospital taxi driver but you simple agreed as you had the time due to Jungkook arriving late.

Hours went by slowly, very slowly. Jungkook hadn’t texted you anymore which meant his must be on a plane but it made you nervous. You hadn’t seen him in a while and he always stayed the same shy annoying boy you got to know and love, but you were always expecting the worst. What if his famous status got to his head and he would become someone like those Hollywood assholes? You shivered at the thought. But luckily your phone started buzzing making you forget these ugly thoughts of your best friend.

“Hi Y/N! We just landed. I’ll be there in an hour or so.” He exclaimed happily with the dying motor of the airplane being heard in the background.

“Ok, see you soon.” You simply stated before hanging up the phone. You quickly gathered your things and ran out of your office building after shutting all the lights as you were the last to leave.

Every time you went to meet Jungkook after haven’t seen him for a long time you were nervous. Just as nervous as the first time he took you to his dorms to start working on your school project. Which was of course a bad idea as everyone else in his band wanted to disturb you. It also didn’t help that you were a girl and they barely saw girls around their dorms which made them even more annoying. Over the years they had changed dorms and some of them had also bought their own apartment, including Jungkook and his extravagant luxurious apartment. He still asked you to hang out at his dorm which made you unsure of his intentions. Were you going to spend a couple of hours together or were you going to spend the night talking about everything and nothing?

Some of the staff had already arrived and welcomed you with open arms. They had not only seen Jungkook grow up to be a fine human being but they also noticed you becoming more of a woman. Hugs were exchanged and short anecdotes were told, not from your side as you barely had anything new to say.

“Jungkook missed you Y/N. I want to see his face when he notices you here.” One of the staff members said and you couldn’t help but blush. At the beginning most of the staff didn’t like you hanging out with Jungkook. Scared that one of you might fall for the other or even worse, someone might see you two hanging out. Luckily nobody was in love with the other and luckily, but rather unlucky for you, Jungkook couldn’t spend all his free time with you as he was too busy traveling the world with his best friends.

“How have you been Y/N?” Someone of the management asked you and you knew the boys must be close as they’re barely seen without their managers.

“I’ve been good. I’ve been working and everything is ok.” You tried to sound happy and up beat but you secretly needed Jungkook to bring that side back out of you.

“Other things outside work?” He asked you with concern in his eyes but you couldn’t answer him as someone hugged you from behind.

“Y/N!” It was Jungkook’s voice screaming in your ear. It were Jungkook’s arms holding you so tight you could barely breathe.

“Kook. Oh, how I’ve missed you.” You turned around and hugged him tightly with your arms around his neck taking in his scent. Slowly all your worries disappeared and slowly the energy creeped back into your body. Jungkook was like your only charger in this world. The only one who could make you feel happy despite everything.

“You look incredible. Have you lost weight?” Typically of an idol to compliment your weight and inquiring if you really did lose weight.

“Maybe by accident. Did you gain weight though?” You cupped his cheeks in your hand and tried to examine him.

“I only gain muscles.” He said while showing off his arms. You quickly squeezed his arm and were surprised with the hardness of his muscles.

“Missed me that much you had to escape to a gym?” You gently teased him.

“You don’t even know half of it Y/N.” Taehyung said while walking passed Jungkook toward you. Out of all the boys Tae might have been your favorite member of BTS. Not only was he good-looking but also the nicest human being you had ever met. He quickly enveloped you in a big hug.

“I feel like Jungkook has a lot of explaining to do.” You said as soon as Taehyung ended the hug.

“I’ll make sure he never lies and tells you all the nasty details without filter.” His words were more directed toward Jungkook than you.

“I would love that Tae. So how was tour?” You asked the two boys while walking inside with your arms around both their shoulders.

“Sooooo…” Jungkook started. “What’s new?” He asked excitedly.

“Soooo…” you mimicked his adorable behavior. “How was tour?” You asked him trying to ignore his question.

“I’ve already told you about that Y/N. I feel like we’re only talking about me lately and I want to know more about your life.” He tried to get you to talk.

“There is nothing to tell and even if there was it isn’t as exciting as your stories.” This was the second time you were trying to ignore his questions about you.

“Your stories are always interesting. I can’t think of anyone who is better with words than you are.”

“That’s a lie and you know it.” You laughed.

“I never lie. Have you been working on your stories?” How long were you going to ignore his inquiries? This was starting to get hard.

“Not as much as I would’ve liked but there is some progress.” You told him, which was a big fat lie. You hadn’t written anything after a well known publisher told you to f*ck off.

“That is good news though. Can I read some?” He asked you so innocently, you almost wanted to admit your failure of a life to him.

“Only when it is fin-“

“finished. I know.” He completed your sentence and a small smile appeared. Sometimes you forgot how fond you were of the boy sitting cross legged across you.

“Please Jungkook, tell me about your life? What is new? Do you have fresh scar? Is there anyone who caught your eye while I wasn’t in the picture to distract you?” He rolled his eyes at your desperate attempt to change the topic from you to him. Which kind of worked as he started to blush.

“What is it? Why are you blushing?”

“Nothing, but there might be someone.” The blush on his face got bigger and redder.

“Who? Tell me everything.” You cried out.

“We started texting a while back and she’s finishing her tour in a couple of days and then her band will take a little break like ours. We promised each other to make time and have a little date.” He blurted out and you could immediately tell he had waited to tell you about this girl, who is not you.

## flashback ##

“So this is the last time Y/N is going to join us here?” Taeyhung asked sadly with a big baby pout. BTS had debuted two years ago and were finally getting a bit bigger. Their looks were starting to get better and they left their bad boy imitations, which were cringe to say the least.

“Don’t blame me Tae, blame Jungkook. He thinks I’m a distraction because you all work less when I’m around.” You pretended to be hurt but in reality you weren’t. You knew they worked less when you were around and you really didn’t want them to lose focus of their goals which were finally getting closer they could almost touch it.

“I never said you weren’t welcome anymore. You’re making this a way bigger issue than it really is.” Jungkook tried to reason with you but only making things worse.

“You literally just said I wasn’t welcome anymore. So I’ll never set foot again in your smelly dorm.” You said with crossed arms trying to look hurt.

“Please Y/N, don’t do this. Please forget what I said, you are always welcome.” Jungkook pleaded with you and you couldn’t help but smile at his pouty face.

“It’s okay, Kook. I won’t leave you.” You said while cupping his cheeks with your hands. He tried to escape but you weren’t letting him go. You both locked eyes and he immediately stopped resisting and just stared at your face as if you were the only one that mattered.

“You guys are so disgustingly cute sometimes.” Taehyung said while walking away from the two of you.

“He is right though, we’re disgusting.” You said while averting your eyes from his intense gaze.

“I think we’re just cute, not disgusting.” The words escaped his mouth in a little pout.

“Maybe he is right and we’re both.” With that being said the both of you burst out laughing. The kind of extreme laughing your belly would start to hurt after a while. The kind of giggling which left you breathless. The kind of happiness only Jungkook could give you.

## end flashback ##

Yes, there might have been a time where you thought you and Jungkook would’ve ended up together. That thought was easily broken when you had your first boyfriend and Jungkook started to keep his distance out of respect for the other guy. Jungkook was always traveling or working and because you missed him so much you fell into the arms of another guy. Someone who started out as a dream guy but slowly turned into the villain of your story.

“I’m glad you’re finally dating. It was about time.” You happily said while clapping your hands in excitement. There was a soft pang of jealousy at the pit of your stomach but you easily ignored the feeling.

“When are you going to date again?” His question came out as a whisper. A very insecure whisper.

“I date.” You defended yourself while trying to avert your eyes from his questioning ones.

“Really? When was your last date?” He asked you.

“I didn’t know you were going to be so up my personal life. I would’ve made you a FAQ if I had known you were in such an intrusive mood.” You tried to joke away the awkward questions.

“It is not intrusive but more of a bit concerned about you mood.” His eyes softened and again you were close to pouring your heart out to the guy.

“You don’t need to be concerned about me. You need to be concerned about you and your date.” With your words being said he turned into the shy Jungkook you knew and loved.

“I’m so nervous Y/N. You need to prepare me.”

“There is nothing for you to prepare. You’re an amazing person Jungkook and if she doesn’t see that than she is not worthy of your time. But you told me you were texting her?” You asked him genuinely interested.

“Yes, I’ve known her for a while now but last month at an award show we talked for the first time. She immediately gave me her number and Taehyung told me to text her the next day if I didn’t want to screw up.” He blurted out in one breath.

“Tae can be wise. That was indeed a good tactic. We’re too old to play games. If you want to date someone there should be no waiting two days before you call.” You said while nodding your head.

“Girls like that?” He asked you unsure.

“Girls like it when a guy makes an effort to talk to them. We girls like to feel special.” You softly explained to him. It wasn’t his fault he knew so little about the other sex. He had lived a shielded life with you as the only exception of a non idol person in his environment.

“I missed you so much Y/N. You’re the only one I can talk to about this fragile subject. The other guys are barely more experienced than I am.” His eyes were filled with emotions you couldn’t quite explain. They used to be filled with love and affection for you but there has been a shift. He has traded these eyes for someone else and you were left with something different you couldn’t pinpoint what exactly.

“I’m always here for you Jungkook.” You told him your eyes filled with regret. You would always be there for him but will he stay by your side through thick and thin? Through a relationship? Trough everything?

## flashback ##

“Who is the guy you are dating?” Jungkook asked you a bit too loud. Everyone stopped the conversations they were having just to listen to your answer.

“Well, we’re not really dating. We’re just hanging out, you know.” You softly told him. You tried to keep your voice down and hoped Jungkook got the memo.

“That’s dating.” He shot back. The other people in the room tried to start their discussions again as they noticed the private atmosphere hanging round you and Jungkook. Why was he acting like such a d*ick?

“Why are you acting like this?” You hissed.

“You could’ve told me sooner.” Jungkook tried to unfist his hands as he was finally calming down. He never wanted you to be angry so every time he noticed you getting worked up, he just stopped being an ass. Or at least he tried.

“I wanted to tell you in person and not through face time as this is a very personal and important matter.” You calmly explained to him.

“How long has it been going on?” He whispered silently.

“A month or so. I don’t know exactly when it all started.” You tried to clarify but it was all new for you too. You had never considered dating anyone and when Eunwoo happened to cross your path you tried to fight it off as long as you could.

“Are you happy?” There was something in his eyes making your insides go soft. But you ignored these feelings.

“I really am, Jungkook. Eunwoo is a great guy and I would love for you to meet him.”

“If he’s that important to you, I’ll make an effort to like him.”

“That’s all I’m asking Jungkook. Now can we continue eating and feasting as we haven’t seen each other for four months or do you want to keep being an ass to your only best friend?” The both of you started laughing as he put his arm over your shoulder. You leaned into him, taking in his smell at the same time Jungkook kissed the top of your head. This was your safe place and you wouldn’t want to trade it for the world.

## end flashback ##

“Remember to smile.” You told Jungkook while you were doing his hair.

“I can do that.” He said more to himself.

“Also remember to listen to her. Not just listen but ask her small questions about whatever she was talking about. Otherwise it would just seem like you were waiting for her to stop talking so you can start talking.” You stopped tugging at his long hair and took a step back to admire your work. Jungkook was in full date outfit and mindset. There was no way this was going to turn sour.

“Do I look good?” He asked you shyly.

“You always look like the most handsome man in the room.” You honestly complimented him while your hand hovered over his cheek. Your hand never touched his face as he was going to date another girl. That girl was going to be the only one allowed to touch his face like that.

“Thank you.” He grabbed your hand and held it in between his hands “for everything.” He finished.

“What are best friends for, right?” You tried to swallow the lump in your throat. There was son way this date was going to fail. So deep in your heart you knew this was your last moment with Jungkook without having to control your hands. His eyes were looking for yours but you tried to ignore this stare. The moment your eyes would lock with his, you would start to cry and to be honest, he doesn’t deserve that kind of negativity before a date.

“It is time for me to leave.” He said while standing up. His hands never let go of yours though so you were forced to also stand up.

“Ok, have a good time and remember to listen to her.” You said while taking your hands out of his. He was on his own now. You couldn’t hold his hand forever, you know.

“Yes, and something about never smiling.” He joked, which got a laugh out of you.

“Honestly, if you smile or even if you don’t, you’re still the best guy to date. You’re a real catch, my friend.”

“It’s a shame we never dated.” He started which got your heart beating double its normal speed. “You deserve a good guy to date.”

“I’ll find him when the time is right but please Jungkook, leave before you’re too late and blame it all on me.” You said trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach and the lump in your throat. He kissed your cheek and left to go to his date. You fell to floor, feeling drained. It was a first, having to pretend to be happy and cheerful around Jungkook as he usually got it out of you without a problem. But today you had to feign your smile and it didn’t feel good.

#bts #bts jungguk #bts jungkook #jeon jungkook #jeon jungguk #bts fan fiction #fan fiction #fluff #angst #bts x you #Jungkook x you #bts x Y/N #Jungkook x Y/N #jungguk x reader #jungguk

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secretsocietyofstuff · 3 years

Text

The

Egsa (old english | scary)

Spell (old english | news)

Ok.

The Biblical Patriarch Abraham (called the father of nations) had one wife and one sister- the same person- and several concubines and mistresses- each of whom begot him many children. Now, when these children grew up- he gifted them each with magical secrets and one by one sent them east as magi to gather initiates for the creation of Mystery Schools.

We know that, with the exception of Issac, the sons and grandsons of Abraham made their way through India, and even further into the Middle East where Abraham is credited as being the progenitor of Islam as is described in the Quran, though the religion did not officially begin until Mohammeds involvement many centuries after Abraham sent his sons away.

So, when during the birth of the Nazari

in Bethlehem he was visited by '3 foreign Magi from the East,' it takes a special significance in my mind that itches and begs to be tussed out.

That is why I am writing this.

It should be noted that there was never any mention in the original texts of exactly how many Magi attended his birth. It is thought that the authors were drunk. No. It is thought that the authors simply assumed that since there were three gifts..there must have been 3 magi to deliver them. Probably wrong. A supposed eye witness account of the magis journey popped up 300 years after the fact claiming that there were 12 or more traveling in the party.

This lends credence to the idea that this was an entire magical order (or at least its senior brethren;) that this order was almost certainly seeded by one of Abrahams sons or grandsons; and that they traveled not only to attend the Nazaris birth but also to examine the god-child and make sure it was of satisfactory health and temperament. The mother would have been looked at by a normal physician.

There are so many thing in just these two stories alone that I want to share with everybody. Things that would make a Southern Baptist stone my ass to death. Things that would make a Methodist very seriously consider leaving the church to worship Satan.

People just don't realize how fragmented the testaments have become. It was intended as a living document that existed in space but outside of time. There was a reason that the original Hebrew texts contained no punctuation and no vowels..at least until the Masoretes got ahold of it. Despite the scores of Southern parishioners taking absolutely everything they read in the Bible at face value- much of what is taken as 'Gospel Truth' has been either misunderstood, mistaken or even simply mistranslated. It isn't conjecture at this point.

Take the following example:

Go to Google translate and type in

"I am a peaceful man."

Now translate from English to Latin to Greek to Hebrew to Greek to Latin and then back to English again. (Almost exactly how we arrived at our most modern Biblical translation minue English at the begining..by the way)

Surprise, surprise. It now reads

"I have an airplane ticket."

The Nazari himself anticipated this ridiculous game of telephone, which is why he communicated his most important messages with parables. Because parables require deeper thought from the listener, deeper thought from the reader and thus deeper thought from the translator as well.

Moving on..

As mentioned in the Infancy Gospel of Thomas:

II. 1 This little child Jesus when he was five years old was playing at the ford of a brook / and he gathered together the waters that flowed there into pools and made them straightway clean [unintelligible] commanded them by his word alone.

2 And having made soft clay, he fashioned thereof twelve sparrows and nd it was the Sabbath when he did these things [or made them,] / and there were also many other little children playing with him.

3 And a certain Jew when he saw what Jesus did, making things upon the Sabbath day, departed straightway and told his father:

"Lo, thy child is at the brook, and he hath taken clay and fashioned twelve little birds. He hath polluted the Sabbath day."

4 And Joseph came to the place and saw: and cried out to him, saying "Wherefore doest thou these things on the Sabbath, which it is not lawful to do?"

So Jesus clapped his hands together and cried out to the sparrows and said to them: Go! and the sparrows took their flight and went away chirping.

5 And when the Jews saw it they were amazed, and departed and told their chief men that which they had seen Jesus do.

And Jesus smirked. [I added that last part in]

!! Astonishingly, at only 5 years of age the Nazari was demonstrating not only a latent understanding of magical systems but also an ability to apply that system to a PHYSICAL ALTERATION OF THE NATURAL WORLD. He was also showing signs of disdain towards the human beings for whom he had been created to protect. And that coupled with observations of the boys power had everyone in town, not least of all "his parents" deeply, deeply terrified and concerned.

Here again from the Infancy Gospel:

1 After that again he went through the village, and a child ran and accidentily dashed against his shoulder. And Jesus was provoked. He said "Thou shalt not finish thy course." And immediatelhetbe boy who provoked him fell dead at the Nazari's feet. and when some of the onlookers saw what he had done they wrenched at their garmets and said

"From whence was this creature born that every word of his is a great work or a miracle or an act of nature."

And then the parents of the boy he had slain marched unto Joseph, and blamed him, saying: "Thou who has such a child cannot dwell with us in this village unless he is taught to heal and not kill and to bless and not curse. For if he remains as is, he he will slayeth all our children / and then what of us?"

1 Immediately Joseph called the young child apart and admonished him, saying:

"Why are you doing these things? Why do you inflict such unforgivable suffering upon these people? So that they hate us and persecute us? Is this what you wish? But Jesus said,

"I know that these words are not your own (!!??) nevertheless for your sake and for the sake of suffering I will hold my peace.

"But them" Jesus pointed to the parents of the young boy he had slain."Them that accused me.. Them shall bear the weight of their punishment, too."

And straightway they that accused him became blind / and they began to moan and to scream in confused horror until little else could be heard in the town.

2 And they that saw it became even more afraid and even more perplexed / and said that every word which he spake whether it were good or bad, was a deed, or a marvel. So they began to very carefully walk away / pretending not to hear the anguish of their neighbors.

And when he saw what the Nazari had done / he arose and took hold upon his ear and wrung it purple. 3 And the young child was wroth and said unto him:

11l

O. "It sufficeth them to seek but not to find, and verily thou hast done unwisely: Don't you know that I am not my own? Vex me not."

I know what you're all thinking. I spent a year of my life going over this document and asking every difficult question that I could think of. So let me save you some time..

1. The document is authentic. The narrative account matches those of others which which say the same thing in their own texts. Even with evidence, perhaps out of fear, I might have dismissed this manuscript if it weren't for similarly described behaviors by another, far older 'Son of God(s); Gilgamesh, King of Uruk- The (weirdly) 3/4 God King of Mesopotamian Sumeria. If you'll recall, Gilgamesh would routinely rape women in the streets in from of their Fathers and Brothers. He once enslaved a quarter of HIS OWN people....HIS OWN PEOPLE...to build ziggurauts in honor of the Gods- a pantheon to which he technically belonged.

Both Gilgamesh and the Nazari began their brief human existences as supremacists. Their distaste for humanity was oozing off of every word they spoke and off of every action they took. And both of them had to be 'corrected;' Gilgamesh by the Gods (through the creation of Enki-Du, a bizarre man-animal hybrid who challenged Gilgamesh to fight after fight until his rage and hatred subsided.) And the Nazari by his human keepers...though not NEARLY as successfully as Gilgamesh. Here is a link to something I wrote about Gilgamesh a few months ago. It may help to clarify whats happening here in case I miss something.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=246927900243739&id=100047795931957

The Gospl continues:

VI. 1 Now a certain teacher, Zacchaeus by name, stood there and he heard in part when Jesus said these things to his father and he marvelled greatly that being a young child he spake such matters. 2 And after a few days he came near unto Joseph and said unto him: Thou hast a wise child, and he hath understanding. Come, deliver him to me that he may learn letters. And I will teach him with the letters all knowledge and that he salute all the elders and honour them as grandfathers and fathers, and love them of his own years.

"And Joseph chuckled." Is what I would have written, because..

3 And he told him all the letters from Alpha even to Omega clearly, with much questioning. But Jesus looked upon Zacchaeus the teacher and saith unto him: Thou that knowest not the Alpha according to its nature, how canst thou teach others the Beta? thou hypocrite, first, if thou knowest it, teach the Alpha, and then will we believe thee concerning the Beta. Then began he to confound the mouth of the teacher concerning the first letter, and he could not prevail to answer him. 4 And in the hearing of many the young child saith to Zacchaeus: Hear, O teacher, the ordinance of the first letter and pay heed to this, how that it hath [what follows is really unintelligible, but it disturbingly picks up..]

VII. 1 Now when Zacchaeus the teacher heard such and then so many allegories of the first letter spoken by the young child, he was perplexed at his answer and his instruction being so great, and said to them that were gathered there:

Woe is me, wretch that I am, I am confounded! I have brought shame to myself by drawing to me this young child.

2 THIS CHILD IS NOT EARTHLY BORN: this is one that can tame even fire: this is one begotten before the making of the world!

WHAT BELLY BORE THIS? what womb nurtured it? Woe is me, He putteth me from my sense, I cannot follow his understanding. I have deceived myself!

Goddamn. GODDAMN. I mean what the fuck, man? I remember reading this for the first time and simultaneously remembering what the older version of this creature said to his people in Mathew 10:34;

'Do not assume that I have come to bring peace to the earth; I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.'

~shudder~

I'll explain how truly terrifying that statement really is in part 2.

-Chad

#SoundCloud

0 notes

tangerinewrites · 3 years

Text

DAY 17: YEOREUM

11/17-18/2020

wc: 2100

note: i ended this solo kind of abruptly bc i wanted to be able to get a headstart on mina’s solo. yes this is late . but i’m also already ahead on my wc SO SHUT UP

In Seoul, every day felt like never-ending pain for her. When she had first joined Black Lotus, she didn’t expect her life to be any more horrible than it already was. She had already left her life behind back where she used to be. She had lost her family and abandoned her identity in order for her to even be alive and still living, despite all the crimes she’s committed. After she got her job, that she believed she felt numb about, she thought she would no longer have to suffer from whatever life had to throw at her.

But Seoul took away Nana and Taehyung away from her. That was when she finally felt herself breaking down again. With every mission she was given, she felt herself becoming more and more reckless. With the intention of trying to get the task over with, she felt herself becoming more at guilt with the results that came after it all. Even if she knew that everyone she’s assigned to kill has done bad things of their own, she couldn’t help but feel at least a little bit of remorse whenever she sees them begging for their life to be spared.

It’s weird. She always thought that she might be able to deal with the fact that she was a hitman. With all these years of serving Black Lotus with that profession, she thought she’d be numb to the fact that she was killing people. But with how recent events have played out, she began to doubt herself and feels more at guilt with every crime she commits.

If her mother and father were watching her- no, if Nana and Taehyung were watching her, would they be proud of the person she is today? So many questions that Jiae was unsure she knew the answer to.

She wishes her next customer at the flower shop a goodbye before she gets a phonecall from someone. When she looks at the caller ID, she sighs as she recognizes it to be someone from her gang. With no one in the shop, she answers the phone and holds it up to her, making sure to close the door to the flower shop so that no one could come in and witness this conversation, whatever it’ll be about.

“Hello?

“Jiae, are you aware of the fact that you have been slacking at your tasks?”

With who this person was, she expected that kind of tone to come from them. Even if she didn’t necessarily like it, she knew that they had an authority over her. After all, they were second-in-command, meaning they were essentially a boss to her. And with that, it meant she had to do her job correctly.

Which she hasn’t.

“Could you be more specific to what you’re referring to?” Jiae asks with a bored tone. “Because I think I’m doing my job quite well. At least I get shit done.”

“You’re not to be as sloppy as you have been the last few times, Jiae,” the person says over the phone, sounding more threatening this time. Though she’s slightly alarmed by it, she doesn’t let the tone affect her too much. “I thought we made it clear to you that we wanted you to be able to get away with it quickly. Do not think we aren’t aware of the fact that we find you being slow with your killings.” He pauses to collect his thoughts. Jiae already knew him well enough to expect him to do that. “Are you feeling sympathy for these people?”

Jiae gives a good scoff, trying her best to cover up her lie. “Why on Earth would you make such an assumption about me?”

“Why else would you be slacking off? Surely you’re not going to be an idiot and fool around in their house much longer than you have to, right?”

“You’re being silly, Boss. I swear to you that I’m not being a wuss to them,” she huffs, sounding agitated with them. “Could you get off my back? I have a business to run.”

Her boss on the other line laughs. “Fine. Continue being that way. But if you continue showing no progress with your job, you’re DEAD.”

And with that, the phone call ends abruptly, giving Jiae shivers as she puts her phone down. After such a terrifying call, it definitely paints a picture to Jiae about how why, even though she wanted to leave, she couldn’t. Throughout her years of being in this gang, she’s witnessed people she’s been friends with try to leave the gang. She’s watched as they cried to the big man about how they couldn’t deal with this lifestyle anymore. But in the end, they never got what they wanted. If they wanted a way out, they either had to die by the boss’s hand or by their own.

Jiae didn’t want to lie. She practically went through hell since she was a child up until this second. If she were to give up now, she’d be disappointing so many of the people she’s lost throughout her years of living.

So, she holds her heads in her hands and weeps softly into them, hopeless with the fact that she’d have to live this miserable life forever.

Suddenly, she wakes up from that horrible nightmare.

It’s not the first time she’s encountered them. She’s practically had them every single night ever since she found a way to leave her third life behind. But thankfully, they aren’t as gory as the past ones were. She’s had worse nightmares, so she’s just glad over the fact that she woke up in a sweat over a threat rather than something more disturbing.

She wakes up on the couch of her shared apartment. It was definitely with someone she didn’t really expect to share a life with in the first place, but it wasn’t like she was totally disappointed with the results. She only settled with it at first because the both of them were trying to run away from their past lives. But the more time they spent together, the more she felt as if she was destined to be rooming with her. Heck, maybe even more than that.

So when she sees her in front of her face while waking up from her nap, she couldn’t help but smile from amusement. “Iseul, why are you in my face?”

The girl in front of her smirks. “I don’t know, ‘Summer’. Maybe because you have to go to your job? You know, because you’re an English teacher at a high school?”

She groans at the reminder. “I don’t want to go to schooooolll!”

“Should’ve thought of that before you got a job at one,” she sighs, standing up straight and holding out her hand so the other can pull on it and get up. “Well? Are you gonna get ready? I don’t want to have to answer the call from the principal about why Summer Yang is missing.”

She sighs as she takes her hand, pulling herself up with the other’s strength pulling her up. As soon as she was on her feet, she looks at the other with a small pout. “When I get back, can you give me a reward?”

“Oh?” she tilts her head to the side. “What kind of reward?”

“You know…” she looks down at the floor sheepishly for a second before she looks up at the other with a smirk and a wink.

As soon as the other gets it, Iseul smiles back at her. “Get to your job on time and then I’ll think about it.”

She immediately whines in response, but she goes to get herself ready for the day, hoping to get what she asked for as a gift tonight.

"There’s the bell! Have a great weekend, everyone!”

“Thank you, Miss Summer!” a room full of high school juniors said as they made their way out of her classroom, bringing their heavy backpacks behind. It’s only been a year since she first had her job as an English teacher in Connecticut, but she was happy that she was doing well with it. At least that’s what he ratemyteachers.com page said.

As everyone leaves her room, she sees one student waiting at her desk for her. The student wasn’t really someone she considered to be much of a problem in the class. If anything, that student probably reminded her most about herself. Just from her shy personality but eagerness to do well in the class as well as her enthusiasm with her English group, it made Summer feel as if she was looking at a younger version of herself. To be more specific, she felt as if she was looking at Song Yeoreum.

The child looked a little unsettled, though. Curious as to what could be wrong, the girl walks up to her. “Katie? Is everything okay?” she asks her.

The girl looks over at her and shakes her head. “No. I’ve been feelign really stressed out and I wanted to talk to you about it. Because you comforted me in the past before, so I feel like I can trust you with some stuff about my life now.

The little confession is a little endearing for her, but she doesn’t make a comment about that. Instead, she nods her head to show that she understood what she was saying, taking a seat to listen to what she had to say. “You can tell me anything, Katie. You know I’m here to listen.”

"Well, there’s this girl…” she starts off, sounding defeated as she begins her story just like that. “She’s been picking on me for a while and I don’t really know what to do about it. She’s always calling me names and making fun of me for being who I am. And I’m so frustrated because it feels like no one is paying attention to me because I can’t stand up for myself! And I don’t know what to do about it.”

Summer’s heart hurts as she hears the girl go on about her experience to her, especially with the fact that she truly understood what the girl was talking about. “Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry,” she says with a small pout. “Are you fine with hugs?” When the girl nods in response, she pulls the other into a tight hug. When she pulls away, she looks at her and prepares to give a long speech that she wish she could’ve heard years ago from another teacher.

“You should never let someone’s words affect you that way, angel,” she starts off. “In no way should there ever be a person who treats you that way. The next time you get picked on, let me know so that I can report the girl as soon as possible. You are so young and precious like everyone else. And even if it doesn’t seem that way now, I will do my best to prove that to you in any way I can. I promise you.”

The girl looks at her with tears in her eyes. “No! You don’t need to do that. Really. I’m fine!” she insists. “I don’t want her to think I’m a snitch.”

“But Katie, you’re getting hurt!” she says with a frown. “And it’s one of the smarter options to take in this situation. Trust me on that. I’ve had experience.”

“Really?”

She nods. “There was this girl who used to bully me a lot when I was your age. And I really let it get to me, but I made a really rash decision and got myself stuck in a life that I didn’t want to be a part of.” As she describes that, she holds back from grimacing the memories that would follow her after she admitted that. Thankfully, she wasn’t giving too much detail, considering the fact that this wasn’t exactly the setting to do it. Not to mention, she didn’t want her own student looking at her any differently. “I’ve been through hell and back because I had no one help out in that situation. I don’t want that to happen to you, Katie.”

The girl listens to her thoughtfully and she begins to tear up once again. “Thank you, Miss Summer,” she whimpers as she reaches for another hug from the other. “I’m so glad to know that there’s someone out there who wants to help me.”

Summer smiles as she hugs the other back, feeling satisfied to know that she was able to provide that role for her. “Of course. I’ll always have your back, sweetie.”

#( * NANO! )#( * MTM:U - YEOREUM )

0 notes

pitubea1910 · 7 years

Text

Fresh Start - Part 3

Pairing: Barry Allen x Reader

Featuring: Joe West and Julian Albert

Words: 2369

Warnings: none

Tags: @onceuponateenpanwolfian @moonlightbae14 @gothesimplethingsinlife @writingsofagirlintomanyfandoms

Request: none

Notes: thank you to everyone who’s reading this story! I’m so happy you like it so far!

PART 1 / PART 2 / PART 4 / PART 5 / PART 6 / PART 7 / PART 8 / PART 9

Of course that incident during your very first hours in Central City had consequences. You told Thea what happened that same night and, of course, she ended up telling Oliver in no time. As a result, your voicemail was full of messages of a really angry, worried and protective older brother who threatened with showing up in Central City and taking you back with him if you didn’t call him back in less than 12 hours.

Talking him out of that threat in the morning wasn’t easy at all but somehow you managed to calm him down after being with him on the phone for more than an hour. You really appreciated his concern but there were times when you just wanted to kick his ass. Especially when his overprotection caused you to be late for your first day at journalism school.

You were lucky your teacher was a nice mid-age woman. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have been allowed to walk in the class. The first subject was actually pretty interesting. They were going to teach how to write a proper article, what register you had to use and which one you couldn’t, which were the right words according to the topic. They were going to teach you how to write. What you didn’t expect was to have work to do by the time the class had finished.

“I want an article about the topic you chose concerning Central City. It can be about projects the Mayor is carrying out, shops opening, metahumans, crime…whatever you chose is ok. Just remember: adjust your register, your language and state your sources. You have a week. Thank you and I see you on Wednesday” she explained while she took her papers.

The rest of the classes were as interesting as the first one and you couldn’t wait to see what this degree had to offer but you were already loving it. Lucky for you, the only work you had to do so far was writing that article and you had a week. Your way back home, all you could think about was topics to write about and you couldn’t come up with any good one.

It took you a time to find a parking spot and when you did, you went straight to Jitters to have lunch since you still didn’t have time to buy groceries and didn’t feel like doing it. When you finally had your lunch and a table to sit, you took out your laptop and started doing some research on the city while you called Thea.

“Hey! How was your first day?” She asked the moment she picked it up.

“Great! I already love it” you smiled with enthusiasm. “But I already have work to do and I honestly don’t know where to start” you said.

“What is it about? Maybe I can help” she suggested. Soon you told her what the class was about and what you had to do, hoping she could really help you out on this one.

“And I don’t know what I can talk about. When the teacher started talking about writing an article, I immediately thought about writing it about Oliver, you know? I can get an interview with the Mayor of Star City” you laughed. “But then she said it had to be about Central City” you sighed scrolling down the screen in search for some inspiration.

“I would do it about metahumans” she said right away. You frowned at the answer.

“I’m not really interested in them” you commented.

“But people is! It’s an article people would read. Normal people with super powers? C’mon!” She exclaimed.

“Well you have a point…” you said as you typed ‘metahumans’ and searched for it. “I would definitely have information” you added as you saw all the results.

“And I’m sure you can even go to the police and ask someone there. They must have an expert or something like that” she told you.

“I guess…” you whispered. “Actually yes, maybe I can do it about metas” you nodded to yourself. “Thanks Thea, you’re a love” you said.

“I know” she said. You rolled your eyes at the response. “I gotta go to work but I’ll text you later, ok?”

“Ok, bye Speedy” you said before hanging up. “Metahumans…” you mumbled looking through the articles that had been written about them. “The world is crazy” you added before closing your laptop.

You had your topic, you had a week and you were hungry. It could definitely wait.

When you finished your lunch you went straight to the supermarket. You couldn’t just waste money eating out so the sooner you had your food, the sooner you would stop wasting money. The rest of the day was spent at home, unpacking and putting everything in place while you made a list of the things you needed for the apartment. By the time you were done, you were completely exhausted so you made yourself some popcorn, connected your computer to the TV and turned on Netflix.

Next day at university, the classes were as interesting as the first one. Except History of Journalism. That was the most boring class you had ever attended to and the teacher didn’t help. All he did was turning off the lights, turn on the computer and play a PowerPoint while he started talking in a monotone tone that would make anyone fall asleep.

So, after 15 minutes trying to paying attention and not getting anywhere with that, you opened your internet browser and started doing some research of metahumans as you took notes of everything you saw that it looked interesting. You knew there had been many metahumans attacks here in Central City but you never thought there would be that much. In less than five minutes you had a whole list of fifteen metahumans with different powers. But one of them stood out: The Flash.

The scarlet speedster that had saved Central City was all around the papers. Obviously he was loved by the whole city and he had even worked with the Green Arrow sometimes. It was interesting but the articles didn’t give you much more information. You needed a source and you knew where to get one: CCPD. You searched through the department web and soon you came up with a name: Julia Albert, metahumans expert. He was your guy.

When you finished your classes you went straight to the police department. There had to be someone who could give you more information about these metas so, once again, you were standing in front of the desk. Fortunately, this time there was another man behind it. A nicer one than the last time.

“I’m a journalism student and I have to write an article for one of my classes” you started explaining after he asked you what you needed. “I’ve decided to write it about metahumans so I was wondering if I could talk to Julian Albert? Your expert” you smiled.

“First I would need to your student ID if that’s not a problem” the man smiled at you.

“Oh sure! Sorry” you chuckled looking for it in your bag. Soon you found it and showed to him before hanging it around your neck.

“Alright, Miss Queen” the officer said with a smile. “Albert’s lab is upstairs. Turn left and you will find it at the end of the corridor” he informed you.

“Thank you” you smiled at him before following his instructions.

You would love to say that you got there with no problems but the truth was that your orientation wasn’t good at all so you had to ask for indications once again. Finally, you found the door with a sign next to it that said “Forensic Lab”. You peeked in and saw a blond guy sat down in front of a table, focused on some papers, and another one next to the window, looking at some kind of tube. Before you could say anything, the blond one got up in a hurry.

“Caitlin texted me. She has the result. I’ll text you later” he said taking his coat. His British accent actually surprised you.

“Alright” the other guy said.

“Hi…” you said shyly as you walked into the laboratory.

Both of them looked at you at the same time, obviously not expecting anyone at the moment. You imagined the blond guy was Julian Albert, the expert, since you recognized the other one as Barry, the nice guy you met on your first day. It looked like he recognized you as well, since he smiled at you the moment he looked at you.

“Hi! What a surprise,” Barry said.

“Do you know her?” Julian asked confused.

“I met her the other day downstairs. What are you doing here? Is everything ok?” He asked walking over you.

“Yes, actually I came to talk to you…Julian?” You said looking at the British.

“That’s too bad because I have to go. Sorry. But I’m sure Barry will be able to help you” he said walking pass you before you had the chance to say anything.

When he was gone you just stood there like an idiot, a bit confused by how he had stormed off all of sudden. Did you smell or something? When you heard a chuckle in the room, you turned to look at Barry to see him laughing silently.

“Something funny?” You asked raising an eyebrow.

“No, sorry” he chuckled. “You just…look funny right now” he shrugged.

“Well, thank you” you said crossing your arms.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you” he apologized and put the tube on the table. “Can I help you?” He asked.

“I…don’t think so” you frowned. “I came here because I’m writing an article about metahumans for a class so I wanted to talk to the expert but he’s gone faster than The Flash” you told Barry.

“Believe me, The Flash is way faster than that” he smiled as he walked over you. “What are you studying?” He asked.

“Journalism. Just started” you smiled proudly.

“Really? A friend of mine is a journalist for the CCPN” he told you. “Central City Picture News” he added when he saw your confusion. “You’re not from here, are you?” He asked.

“I’m from Star City, actually. I’m still trying to get used to the place” you shrugged.

“I see” he nodded. “Well, Julian is busy right now and I think he will be gone for a while. But maybe I can help you” he shrugged.

“Do you know anything about metahumans?” You raised an eyebrow.

“You would be surprised” he chuckled.

The answer was somewhat odd but you decided to let it go. This guy was one of the few people that had been nice to you since your arrival so you didn’t want to bother him with stupid questions.

“Well…ok” you nodded. “So can I ask you some questions?” You said awkwardly since you still wasn’t too sure about how this interviewing thing worked.

“Barry!” A big man came into the room wearing a black coat with a white shirt underneath. “We have to go. Cisco called me. It’s important” he said.

“Eh…Joe, this is (Y/N)” he said stopping this Joe for talking, like he could say anything wrong.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you had company. I’m Joe West, detective” he smiled kindly as he shook your head.

“Nice to meet you” you smiled at him and looked at Barry. “Raincheck?” You asked.

“Absolutely” he said taking a piece of paper and writing something down. “Call me tonight and we can meet up, alright?” he said handing the paper over.

“Sure. Thank you” you smiled at him.

“No problem” he smiled back. “See you”

None of them gave you time to say anything else before they left. Well, it looked everyone in this place was in a hurry except you. With a sigh, you put the paper in your back pocket and you looked around but since you had nothing else to do there you decided to leave the place before someone saw you. You didn’t even know if you were supposed to be there unaccompanied.

You had to do a couple things for college and you were starving so you went straight to the apartment to get it done. The afternoon was over before you even realized but you managed to get everything done in time. Still, you had some laundry to do so you took your basket and went to the laundry room of the building. Before putting the jeans in the machine, you checked the pockets and it was there when you came across the piece of paper Barry gave you.

“Damn!” you exclaimed.

Quickly, you put your laundry in the machine and took out your phone. It was almost 1 a.m. but maybe you were lucky and Barry was still awake. First, you saved his number into your phone and then, hesitantly, you dialed it and waited, biting your lip as you felt some tickling in your stomach.

“Hello?” His voice said on the other side of the phone.

“Hi Barry. It’s me, (Y/N)” you said.

“Oh, hi! I was starting to think that you had found another metahuman expert to talk to” he said making you laugh a little.

“I would never do that to you” you smiled. “Sorry it took me so long, I’ve been busy” you sighed.

“No worries. I’ve been busy too so I guess you called just in time” he said.

“I’m glad then. So…when are you available?” You asked biting your lip. Why did you felt so nervous doing this?

“Are you free tomorrow? Maybe we can have some coffee around 10 in the morning?” He suggested. Luckily for you, you didn’t have your first class until noon the next day so 10 should be fine.

“Sure! That would be great” you agreed.

“Perfect. Do you know where Jitters is?” He asked.

“Of course” you smiled. “So…see you there at 10 then” you said.

“Sure. See you tomorrow. Goodnight” he replied.

“Goodnight Barry” you said and slowly hung up, ignoring all those sensations going up and down your body just by the sound of his voice. Definitely, you needed to calm down.

548 notes · View notes

unabashedly-here · 7 years

Photo

A/N: Kind of Peter appearance at the end. Again not purely concentrated on Peter until the next part

Part 1

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Since the curriculum at Midtown was more challenging than what you were used to, you weren’t able to help Tony with his inventions like you did during the summer. Sometimes he’d whine about you taking a break, which would work for about half an hour. Tony was proud of how you were handling the work from school.

You were given a choice, since you could get to Midtown from your mother’s apartment or Tony’s. You absolutely loved the atmosphere and tinkering with Tony, but you didn’t want to hurt your mother’s feelings. Fortunately, you were not required to make the difficult decision because, as your grandparents got older, your mother felt guilty that they are living by themselves. She is staying in the suburb they live in, making it almost impossible to get to school on time.

During his run in with Captain America, Bruce Banner, Thor, Clint, and Natasha, Tony assumed the worst when he saw your number pop up on the Caller ID. “What’s wrong, kid?” he asked while the other people in the room looked at him incredulously. They were previously talking to him.

“Nothing,” you answered casually, “Just wanted to talk to my dad while he’s on a dangerous mission.”

“Okay, let me rephrase the question,” Tony continued, “What did you break?”

Ignoring his question, you immediately asked, “Is it true Steve Rogers is on a mission with you? Captain America?” You were slightly blushing on the other end, but Tony obviously couldn’t see that.

“Yeah, but he’s not as impressive as I thought he would be,” Tony answered in a straight forward tone.

“After the mission, will I be able to meet him?” you ask, trying not to sound excited, but Tony picked up on it.

He responded, “I don’t like that tone. Stop it.” The thought of his daughter developing a crush on Captain America was beyond weird in his head. Of course, he knew that it was one of those celebrity crushes, since you were a teenager. That doesn’t mean he has to tolerate it.

“I’m merely suggesting that it would be interesting to meet the famous Captain America.”

You didn’t hear any words for a little, only reluctant groaning from Tony. “Fine,” he agreed, “He’ll come over one time. Then, once you see the real him, this will all be over.” You repeatedly thanked him before telling him to stay safe and hanging up.

While Tony continued the mission, he didn’t hear much from you. Only a few texts about the tutor your teacher forced you to get. You were furious over it, since you were convinced that you didn’t need a tutor in Computer Science, but your teacher wanted you to learn something specific only the tutor could teach you.

Some of the Avengers with Tony were getting aggravated, but he simply responded to their protestations with, “You have a kid and then talk to me.” Most typically shut up after that.

After Loki was defeated, Stark Tower was being converted into a building for the Avengers. Since Tony was planning on spending most of his time there, you had your own room there. It was then when you finally met the famous Captain America, or Steve Rogers. He was moving into the building and Tony was showing him around when he saw you in the kitchen doing work. “Alright, here we go,” he muttered to himself, which confused Steve.

Wanting to get this over with quickly, Tony swiftly went through the room, hastily saying, “Steve, Y/N. Y/N, Steve. Nice that you two are acquainted. Now let’s go, Capsicle.”

You didn’t seem to protest, but Steve, still ignorant of the whole situation, insisted to properly introduce himself. The forties manners always followed him. “It’s nice to meet you, Y/N,” he introduced himself while extending his hand, “I’m Steve.”

To Tony’s surprise, your response was very casual as if you didn’t care that Captain America, the same person you were almost obsessed with meeting almost a month ago, was in the kitchen. “Hey, Steve. Nice to meet you.” With that, you quickly glanced at your phone.

Tony excused you and him so he could get to the bottom of this. The two of you were in the hallway when Tony asked, “You did want to see Capsicle, right?”

“Oh, I guess I did.”

At that point, his mind was running like wild. What had managed to cause this sudden change of mind? He saw you look at your phone again and the pieces fit together all at once. “No,” Tony said distantly.

“What?” You were lost at what he was referring to.

“No.”

“I have no idea what is wrong here.”

Tony said with disbelief, “No!”

You slowly waved your hand in front of Tony’s face. “Are you broken? Do I need a new Tony?”

Crossing his arms, Tony finally responded with something else, “Who is he? The new boy?” He looked at you knowingly. How could you even think for a second Tony wouldn’t notice.

“What?” You scoffed, “There’s no one.” As soon as you finished the sentence, your phone rang and you jumped to pick it up. “Hello? Oh, hi, Peter.” Tony was staring at you incredulously. “My house,” you echoed, while looking around at the place you called home before suggesting, “How about the library?”

#peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader #tom holland imagines #tom holland #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #marvel imagine #marvel #tony stark #stark!reader #stark!reader x peter parker #peter parker #peter parker imagines

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hamilton-gaygod · 7 years

Text

Where is the truth?

Lin x Reader, Daveed x Reader

Part One Part Two Part Three

Summary: Lin finds something interesting on Tumblr, and there it begins.

Word Count: 2,197

Warnings: swearing, angst.

A/N: This is my first fanfic in English (it’s not my native language), and I had no one to proofread it, so I hope it’s not that bad. And I’m sorry for mentioning Vanessa, I love and respect her, but I just needed more drama here. This is supposed to be part one.

Lin was sitting on the couch in his girlfriend’s apartment where he spent the most of his time staring into his laptop as usual. He was supposed to write another song for his new project but surprisingly he had no ideas. Y/N was at work and he had nothing else to do. So he was scrolling the dashboard on Tumblr when he saw something interesting. It was a blog dedicated to Hamilton cast and it was Y/N’s picture on the profile. He was surprised because no one knew about their relationship. Actually, Y/N was not a celebrity, she worked as a teacher and it seemed strange to Lin that someone associated her with Hamilton. Unless…

Lin clicked the link and saw a description: “Hey there. I’m Y/N. 22. Lin-Manuel trash. ” And then it became clear to Lin. It was Y/N’s old blog. There were Lin’s and his castmates’ pictures almost in every post, Y/N reblogged even some sort of shitty fanfiction about him. That might seem adorable but actually, that was not. Lin thought that it was creepy in some way. Of course, he knew that Y/N were sort of his fan before they met, a lot of people knew who Lin-Manuel Miranda was, but this way? It seemed like an obsession. Completely unhealthy obsession, Lin thought. Although he didn’t have much time to think it over as he heard the door opened.

“Lin, babe, I’m home!” He heard your voice.

Not having heard the answer you walked into the living room and saw your boyfriend standing in front of the coffee table with the laptop on it.

“Hey, babe, what’s up?” You smiled. “Didn’t you hear I came in?”

“Y/N, could you please explain to me what is it?” Lin asked, turning the laptop so you could see the screen.

“What are you talking about?” You said with a smile on your face and then you saw. “Oh… This.” You completely forgot about that old blog of yours and obviously, Lin wasn’t supposed to see it.

“Yes, Y/N. I found it today and I guess this blog belongs to you and I need explanations.” He closed the laptop and turned to face you with his arms crossed.

“Lin, it’s nothing. It was long ago, I was young and I was fangirling over you and In The Heights. I wanted to delete all of this stuff but…”

“But I’m even glad that you didn’t,” he snapped. “At least I found out who you are after all.”

“What?” You narrowed your eyes. “And who am I now? You are such a fanboy yourself and there is nothing wrong with it.” You tried to take his hand into yours offering a weak smile.

“But I don’t date people I am fanboying over.” He didn’t let you take his hand and took a step back.

“Lin, I still don’t get it. Yes, I did like you and your work before I met you, and then I fall in love with you and we started dating. What’s wrong? Why are you so mad at me?”

“Because I don’t know what to think now!” He exclaimed and went to your bedroom looking for his backpack as you were following him. “I don’t know if you really fell in love with me or you just were so obsessed with me that you decided to meet me and do everything possible to be my girlfriend. What was it for? Money? Fame? Anything else? And I don’t know if I can trust you anymore, Y/N.”

He packed some of his clothes into the backpack while you were just standing in the doorway watching him. Suddenly you began to sob and Lin turned to look at you. You saw that his eyes were also wet but he was trying his best not to cry.

“Just don’t begin to cry, Y/N!” he snapped at you. “Stop being fake at least now.”

“I… I’m not fake, L-lin,” You began to stutter as you always did when you were worried. “I l-love you and I always did.

"Oh I’m well aware of the fact that you did,” He said in a cold tone. “Or should I say you were obsessed with me and made me fall in love with you?” Lin came up to you with the backpack in his hand and looked into your eyes. “If it was not you, I could be with Vanessa for all this time.”

You took a deep breath hearing her name. Vanessa was Lin’s first love and you were always a little worried that he didn’t forget her. Of course, your relationship was perfect and you had never doubted that he loved you, but everyone has a special place in their heart for their first love and Lin wasn’t an exception.

“Vanessa left you before we even met, Lin!” You snapped back. “Don’t act like I was the reason you two broke up.”

“You were the reason I didn’t try to fix things with her and now I lost her forever.” His words made you cry again and Lin reached out his hand to wipe а tear away from your cheek with his thumb even without thinking. You looked into his eyes but he immediately looked away and removed his hand as you stepped back so he could leave the room.

“You know what, Miranda?” You said watching how fast he put on his shoes and coat. “Go the hell out of here! I don’t want to hear her name again in my own fucking house and I don’t want to see your fucking face ever again!”

“Great! You won’t see me again, Y/N!

He slammed the door behind him leaving you alone. You returned to the living room and sat down on the couch still crying. Everything had been so good, you two had been together for almost three years now. Of course, three years is not such a long time but you were sure that Lin was your one and only. Apparently, he didn’t think so. Apparently, he still believed Vanessa was his one and only.

When your sobbing went to a minimum you finally looked around searching for your phone. Then you realized that Lin didn’t even take his laptop with him. Probably he was going to ask some of his friends to come and pick up his stuff, Groff for example. When you finally found your phone, there already were a few messages from Groff asking what had happened and if you were okay and you typed the answer.

To: Groff No, Jonathan, I’m not okay.

To: Y/N Y/N, I don’t know what’s happened but Lin asked me if he could stay at my place and now he has locked himself in my guest room and doesn’t get out.

To: Groff We had a fight and I said I didn’t wanna see him again. So he left.

To: Y/N Oh, girl! I’m so sorry. Need anything?

To: Groff We are just not meant to be together. I need you only to take care of him, please.

To: Y/N I will. Love you, girl. Everything will be fine.

To: Groff Thanks, man. Love you too.

Jonathan was one of Lin’s best friends and since he had introduced you to Groff you two became very close. You went to Broadway shows together when Lin was busy with his show, you even had sleepovers at his place when Lin was not in New York for work and you didn’t want to be alone at your apartment. Lin often joked that you stole his best friend along with his heart, but it wasn’t really true. They were always there for each other, that is why Lin decided to stay at Jonathan’s place after your fight. Or was it break up? You didn’t know for sure, but at least you knew that Lin had a friend he could rely on.

It was a New Year’s eve and the streets were slightly covered with snow. The day before you returned from your parents’ where you spent Christmas days. All of your friends were going to New Year parties today but you decided just to stay at home and dedicate this evening to yourself. You were about to take a bath when your phone rang, the caller ID showed it was Daveed, one of Lin’s Hamilton castmates. You signed and picked up the phone.

"Hey, Y/N! Diggs calling!” He said cheerfully.

“Hi, Daveed.” You answered.

“Y/N, look. I have a party at my place tonight and you are invited.”

“That’s very nice of you, Daveed, but I…”

“I don’t take ‘no’ for an answer”.

“But…”

“Lin won’t be there. I understand your feelings, Y/N, and I promise he won’t be there. The other castmates will be glad to see you, especially Groff and me.”

“I wasn’t planning to go anywhere tonight, Daveed.”

“Do I have to repeat it again? I don’t take ‘no’ for an answer. Groff will pick you up at seven, be ready!”

He didn’t even let you answer and just hung up. The perspective of spending time with Hamilton cast seemed nice, except for they all reminded you of Lin. Lin, who had been with you for almost three years. Lin, who broke up with you because of a stupid blog on the Internet. Lin, who didn’t talk to you since then, for six months now. Lin, who moved to London for work recently with his newlywed wife.

All of your friends tried not to mention him when talking to you, but you wasn’t blind, the news about him was in newspapers, on TV, and on the Internet. It would be easier if you didn’t love him anymore but you did, and seeing his smile on the pictures of him and his wife, Vanessa, was heartbreaking. You really didn’t want to know how exactly they got back together and it was none of your business. You tried to move on, live your life, but it wasn’t that easy.

There was a lot of people at Daveed’s party. The original cast of Hamilton, the guys from the current cast and crew, some of Daveed’s friends. Almost everybody had plus one and you were glad that you were there with Jonathan. He squeezed your hand everytime someone started to talk to you about Lin and the great things he had done. No wonder, Lin was a genius who created something magical and gave the job to all these people. But Groff knew that every time you looked up at him, he had to bring a new glass of champagne for you. It was your third glass when Daveed approached to you.

“Hey, Y/N. Nice to see you here.” He greeted you, kissing your cheek.

“Thank you for the invitation”.

“My pleasure. Having fun here?”

“I am! I mean… Jonathan was supposed to bring me more champagne but now he is flirting with some guy from the ensemble.” You pointed at the bar where Groff was laughing at the guy’s jokes.

“Oh, let me be a gentleman,” Daveed laughed, taking an empty glass from your hand. “You look stunning in this dress, by the way.”

You forced a smile, remembering that you bought that dress for Hamilton Chicago opening night where you were supposed to be Lin’s date, but you had never get the chance. Suddenly you noticed someone in the corner of the room that made you weak in the knees.

“Oh my God, Y/N, are you alright?” Daveed grabbed you around the waist not letting you fall.

“I’m fine. Just… Need some fresh air I guess.”

“Let me walk you out to the balcony,” he said, still with his hand on the small of your back.

As soon as you stepped out into the fresh air you felt much better. That couldn’t be Lin, Diggs promised you before that he wouldn’t be here, you thought.

“Here,” You felt the fabric on your shoulders. “Take my jacket, it’s cold outside.”

“Thanks,” You muttered, looking at Daveed, who was in a shirt now which accentuated his muscles and you gulped at the sight of his arms.

“Are you… Are you sure you want champagne?” He asked. He clearly noticed that you stared, and you lowered your eyes and colored slightly.

“Water would be fine.” You whispered, and Daveed nodded, quickly stepping inside.

The wind blew your hair back from your face, and you closed your eyes, hearing the noise from the apartment. It was almost midnight, but this year you had no one beside you to share a kiss with. You heard the sounds of fireworks and loud voices counting the seconds before the New Year. Suddenly you felt a soft kiss on your lips and your eyes flickered open.

“Lin?”

“Happy New Year, Y/N.”

#lin x reader #lin manuel fanfic #lin manuel x reader #lin manuel imagine #daveed x reader #daveed imagine #daveed diggs imagine #daveed diggs fanfic #hamilcast x reader

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adoredykelano · 7 years

Text

No Comebacks

[No Angel] [No Comebacks] [No More and No Less]

pairing: rafael casal x reader

request: a couple people wanted a part two of No Angel, and eons ago someone requested “In celebration of you getting trashed last night and Rafa liking your drunk tweet.... a Rafa X reader where reader gets drunk and Rafa takes care of her... like... like sexually if you didn't get that. and then when they wake up she's really hungover and he takes care of her but in the fluff way."

summary: rafa has been ignoring reader after their night together, so reader tries to go out to a party and forget him. it doesn’t work.

warnings: swearing, alcohol, smut, vague D/s mentions, lowkey praise kink

word count: 5,786

a/n: this is the SECOND part of the “no angel” series. it will make sense without the first part but it will make more sense with it. also, briefly want to state (because someone felt the need to scold me about it in my ask box) i don’t endorse student-teacher relationships, and because i’m sure someone will have something to say about it, i also don’t want to encourage you to go to big parties alone and get sloppy drunk with strangers. be safe okay. other than that please enjoy love u bunches. and i still want rafael casal to bone me.

“Good morning,” you shuffle into the kitchen, shooting a sleepy smile at Rafael.

“Morning,” he murmurs, looking up from the stove to beam at you.

Your heart gives a little flutter. His smile is blindingly bright, and looking at him right now feels a lot like looking into the sun.

“I made pancakes,” he says, sliding one onto a plate and offering it to you.

You take the plate and set it down at a placemat, hopping up onto the chair at the counter.

“Thanks,” you fix the hem of the shirt Rafa had given you to wear, straightening it out over the tops of your thighs. “You really didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to,” he replies simply, walking up behind you. He leans down and presses a kiss to the top of your head before sitting next to you.

You begin to eat the pancake, letting one of your legs swing back-and-forth gently. The two of you eat in silence for a couple minutes, and you’re grateful. Your mind isn’t exactly the sharpest this soon after waking up.

“I think it’s pretty disrespectful to have sex with someone, talk until you fall asleep holding them, and then not provide them with breakfast in the morning,” Rafael adds, picking up his coffee mug and taking a sip.

“Ah yes. It’s truly a shame not everyone can be as well-mannered as you,” you laugh, setting your fork down on your now empty plate.

“You know,” he peers over at the clock on the microwave. “I don’t have anywhere to be for a couple more hours...”

“Is that so?” You turn toward him, a smirk spreading across your face.

“Do you know what that means?” He smirks back at you, wiggling one eyebrow in your direction.

“Mm,” you hum, rising from the seat. “We can cuddle more?”

“Exactly,” he agrees, nodding.

You giggle, taking one of his hands. “I was kidding, but if you don’t want to have sex again-”

“Oh, I said no such thing,” he reprimands, standing and tugging you toward his bedroom.

That was a week ago. And you hadn’t heard from him since.

The thing is, you had given him your number. You had seen him in class. You had passed him in stairwells. You had even physically bumped into him at the library.

“And every single time, he ends up ignoring me!” You groan and bury your face in your pillow.

“That’s so weird,” Kristen declares, turning a page in her notebook.

“More like rude,” Anna quips from her perch on your desk.

You roll over to gaze at the ceiling. “I just don’t know what to do. I really thought he liked me. He acted like he cared - even before the sex. Like, in class and stuff.”

“Yeah,” Kristen turns around in her chair. “Remember that time he asked you to stay after class because you weren’t acting as ‘animated’ as you usually were?” She throws air quotes around “animated” to remind you that it was the exact word he had used.

“Of course I do,” you lament, rubbing at your forehead with one hand.

“I hate to be the one to have to say this, but,” Anna pauses, glancing up from filing her nails, “maybe you need to… get over him?”

Your eyes slip closed and you sigh softly. You can tell that both Anna and Kristen are watching you, waiting for you to react.

“And how do you suggest I do that?” You finally ask.

“Well - I overheard someone in my econ class talking about a party at Kappa Sigma tonight,” Kristen suggests, turning back to her textbook.

“You hate frat parties and Anna is banned from Kappa after the cow incident-”

“How was I supposed to know that cows can’t walk down stairs!” Anna wails, crossing her arms.

“Anna, for the hundredth time,” you mutter, sitting up in your bed, “I’d like to ask you what the fuck you were doing in the Kappa Sigma house that necessitated leading a cow upstairs.”

She shrugs, pouting.

“Anyway,” Kristen rolls her eyes, “you should still go. It might be good for you, and I’m sure you’ll know someone there.”

“Yeah,” Anna nods, standing and going to your closet.

“Are you looking for something for me to wear to a party that I haven’t even decided to go to yet?”

Anna pulls a few different skirts out of your closet and examines them. “Duh.”

You roll your eyes. “It isn’t even- holy shit, how is it already ten?”

“The earth’s rotation,” Kristen replies, not looking up from her books.

“Grey or red?” Anna asks.

You open your mouth to answer but Kristen cuts you off.

“The light grey skirt with that top she just bought online.”

Anna nods as you look between the two of them.

“I can’t believe you two are really making me go to a party without you,” you whine, taking the clothes from Anna and starting to change.

“It’s for your own good,” Anna promises. “Also, this lip color.” She holds up a liquid lipstick before hopping back onto the surface of your desk.

You change quickly and move in front of the mirror, applying the lipstick with a steady hand.

“Kappa’s the one on Biltmore Avenue, right? The massive old house?” You grab a bag and put your ID card and lipstick in it.

Anna nods.

“Their heating bill must be insane in this weather,” Kristen remarks.

You stare at her back for a moment before shaking your head. You’re never going to understand the way her mind works.

You say goodbye, promising to either be back to the dorm by two a.m. or text Kristen if you decide to go home with someone else. You tug a jacket on and find your way outside.

You’d forgotten that the route you were on to the frat led you right past Rafael’s apartment building. Right under his fourth story window. As you walk past, you pick up the pace a bit, hoping that he doesn’t see you, but also wishing that he would.

You walk around the fountain in the middle of the square and take a left, arriving at the fraternity only moments later. You tug your jacket off and make sure to tuck the hem of your white crop top into the top of your light grey skirt, pushing the door to the frat house open.

Almost immediately, you’re approached by a tall, handsome man who introduces himself as Todd.

“How about a drink, gorgeous?” Todd asks, offering his arm out to you.

You muster up your best sultry smile and loop your arm through his, dropping your jacket over the banister and pressing yourself close to him. “I’d love that, Todd.”

He smiles down at you and weaves through the crowd, leading you into the kitchen. There’s a massive table full of bottles and cans.

“What would you like?” He gestures to the table, picking up two empty cups.

You scan the table, looking at your options. Nothing jumps out at you, but free alcohol is free alcohol and you have a hell of a lot to forget for the night.

“Whatever you’re having is fine for me,” you smile, peering up at him through your lashes.

He nods and grabs a couple different bottles, pouring various amounts into each cup. The liquid sloshes a bit against the red plastic as he hands the cup to you.

You probably should’ve been a little less hasty with your drinks, but soon enough you’re four drinks and two shots into your evening. At some point you had gone from casually chatting with Todd to dancing with him and his friend, pressed between the two of them with your back to Todd’s chest. You think Todd introduced her as Ava, but you can’t quite remember. One of them starts kissing your neck and you tilt your head to the side, grinding your hips back against Todd.

“Hey,” Ava’s warm breath fans across your shoulder as she leans down to whisper in your ear. “Do you want to get out of here?”

You nod and tangle your fingers with hers as she leads you out of the crowd and upstairs. Ava pushes through the door to an empty bedroom and you let go of her hand, taking a few quick strides and positioning yourself on the bed. You sit upright exactly in the middle of the bed, your legs straight in front of you crossed at the ankle. You’re leaning back on one of your palms and she lets out a soft laugh.

“You’ve sure made yourself at home,” she smirks, leaning back against the closed door.

You don’t say anything, instead leaning your head to one side and letting your gaze roam over her sequined black dress. It hugs her curves perfectly, falling to the middle of her thigh.

“Like what you see?” She asks, amusement playing on her features.

“Very much so,” you raise an arm and beckon her with a crook of your finger.

She walks toward you slowly, her full hips swaying slightly as her heels click on the stone tile floor. When she reaches you, she crawls down the bed until she’s hovering above your body. The hem of her dress rides up as she parts her legs to straddle you.

Your hands find her hips as she leans forward, her shoulder-length platinum hair falling around the sides of your faces to create a curtain.

The anticipation is too much for you, so you incline your face toward her and cover her lips with yours. The kiss quickly becomes heated, her hands sliding into your hair and yours sliding around to grab her ass. She swipes her tongue over your bottom lip and you let your mouth fall open as she eases you back against the pillows.

You run your hands down her thick thighs as your tongues meet, beginning the power struggle. With men, you’re almost always submissive - but with women, it usually takes a bit longer for your roles to take shape.

Ava parts your legs with her knee, letting her thigh rest between yours while she kisses her way over your jawline. Her hips roll up against yours, her lips trailing down your neck.

You tilt your head, a gasp leaving your lips as her teeth brush your collarbone and she tugs your top down just far enough to free your breasts. Your hands slip under the hem of her dress to grasp at the flesh of her backside, gently squeezing the soft skin.

“No panties, hm?” You murmur, dipping your fingers down teasingly between her thighs.

She ruts down on your hand, desperate for friction where she needs it most.

“Never,” she asserts defiantly into your chest before letting her lips wrap around your nipple.

You moan softly and arch your back, pressing yourself closer to her.

“You’re positively sinful,” you breathe, one hand travelling between the two of you to circle tauntingly around her clit.

Ava whimpers softly as you tease her, letting out a subdued sigh when your finger finally presses against her bundle of nerves. You’re both completely in the moment as she moves her mouth back to yours, moaning against your lips when you run two fingers over her entrance.

“Awesome!”

“What the fuck,” Ava jumps away from you, tugging her dress down.

You yank your top back over your chest and sit up, staring down the intruder.

“Hey, don’t stop on my account,” he leans against the door casing, a grin plastered across his face. “I’d love to watch you two go at it. Lesbians are hot.”

Ava stares at him, a look of disgust and discomfort plastered across her face. She shifts on the bed and runs a hand through her hair.

“Well?” He motions between you two.

You look over at Ava, who seems to be stunned into silence, before turning back to him.

“Alright, listen, Chad or Tad or Brody or Mike or whatever unfortunate name your parents thought fitting to bestow upon your impolite white ass,” you stand, readjusting your skirt and crossing your arms in front of you. “First of all, in most places it’s customary to knock before you barge into a room with a closed door. And second of all,” you step closer to him, “our sexuality isn’t for your pleasure, douchebag.” You punctuate your sentence with a firm jab at his sternum.

His face instantly contorts, becoming flushed as he squints angrily at you. “You listen, bitch-”

“Hey, bro!” Ava shouts from the bed, directing his attention to her. “Get the fuck out!”

He huffs and clenches his jaw, but turns around and walks out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

You stand in silence, just staring at the door for a moment.

“Anyway,” Ava sighs. “Do you still want to-” she cuts herself off, raising an eyebrow at you.

Your gaze drops to the floor and you turn to face her. With the adrenaline wearing off, you’re left unsure.

“I don’t know,” you admit, rubbing a hand across the back of your neck. “And it’s nothing to do with you, it’s just-”

“It’s just that you were here trying to forget someone, and you realize now that you’ve done everything except that?” Ava guesses, a small dejected smile on her face.

“Yeah,” you respond quietly. “I shouldn’t have even agreed to come up here with you. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to be sorry,” she says with a single laugh. “Honestly, I was doing the same thing.”

“You were?” Your eyes shoot up to her face, widening in shock.

She nods. “I was. The only difference being that I was actually succeeding at it,” she says jokingly. “But if you’re still thinking of them after that, well...you should probably go to them.”

You raise a brow at her.

“Really,” she insists. “Go.”

Without another thought, you rush out of the room. You walk as fast as you can manage without falling down the stairs and dash out the front door.

You march resolutely toward Rafael’s building, the alcohol surging through your veins nearly numbing the sensation of the frigid air against your bare arms. Puffs of white breath hang in front of you while you hasten over the sidewalk. You pull your phone out of your jacket and shoot off a text to Kristen, letting her know your plan. The clicking of your heels on the pavement is the only sound you can hear aside from the wind whistling between the buildings.

When you get to the door, you accidentally press the wrong buzzer and a young woman’s voice responds. “Who is it?”

“Shit,” you mutter, “I’m so sorry, I pressed the wrong button. I’m a drunk idiot.”

“No problem,” she responds with a short laugh. “Be safe.”

You try again, making sure to press the button with “Casal” stamped on label tape in all capitals next to it. A few seconds pass and there’s no response.

“Rafa,” you whine, pressing the buzzer again. “It’s fucking cold out here and I don’t know where my jacket went, let me in.”

There’s silence for a few more seconds before his reluctant voice sounds over the intercom.

“Come in,” Rafael sighs, the door making a buzzing noise and then a click to let you know it’s open.

Your heel catches on the edge of the floormat as you stride through the door and toward the elevator, nearly causing you to lose your balance. Thankfully there’s a wall nearby to catch you when you stick a hand out, turning back to smooth out where the stiletto had lifted the edge of the mat.

The ride to the fourth floor takes much longer than you remember it taking, so you lean against the railing and let out a sigh.

What are you doing here? As you walk out of the elevator, your steps are much slower than they were just moments before. Do you want to talk to him?

No. No, you don’t want to talk. You want to walk through his front door and kick off your shoes, dropping your bag on the entryway table. You want him to look up at you from his seat at the kitchen counter and smile. You want him to storm toward you with arms open, ready to hold you, prepared to absolutely ravage you.

It’s a long shot after the way he’s been acting all week, but it’s worth a try.

And you’ll be damned if you aren’t going to try.

Rafael opens the door and you walk directly into his apartment, dropping your bag.

You take in his black cotton t-shirt and forest green plaid pajama pants. The lenses of his glasses glint in the dim lighting, the green of his eyes behind them very close to the green of his pajamas.

“What are you doing here, [Y/N]?” Rafael asks with an authoritarian edge.

“I came to see you, obviously,” you roll your eyes at him. You take a couple steps closer to him and wrap your arms behind his neck.

“Are you- Jesus Christ,” he shifts away from you slightly. “You smell like a freshly opened bottle of cheap vodka.”

“Yeah,” you murmur, tangling your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck. “That’s what happens when you drink most of a freshly opened bottle of cheap vodka.”

“Right, so you’re drunk off your ass,” Rafael groans, his hands finding your hips.

“So what? Maybe I’m drunk off my ass, but I want you,” you struggle to press your hips closer to him. “I want you to ruin me.”

“[Y/N], we’re not doing this. I’m not doing this.” He disentangles himself, moving away from you. “You shouldn’t have come here.”

You clench your jaw and squint at him for a moment.

“It’s really fucked up,” you say tersely. “You know that, right?”

Rafael looks at you truly puzzled, “You’re saying it’s fucked up that I won’t have sex with you right now?”

“No!” You exclaim in frustration, hands fisting in your own hair. “God, that’s so not the point.”

“What is the point, then, [Y/N]? Please,” he gestures broadly, “enlighten me as to what it is that you find so fucked up.”

“It’s- fuck you,” you spit, glaring at him as he rolls his eyes at you. “Don’t pretend like you’re incapable of fucking up! Everyone fucks up!”

“What the fuck did I do,” he bellows. “Stop stalling and tell me what it is that’s fucked up!”

“That you- that we had sex and after you pretended like you actually cared about me, and then you turn around and ignore me for a week! You did a fucked up thing, just admit it,” you cross your arms over your chest, swaying slightly on your feet. You kick your heels off so your balance will be a little bit better, realizing that showing how drunk you had to be to confront him won’t exactly paint you in the best light.

“You’re right,” he nods. “I did a fucked up thing. I shouldn’t have slept with you at all, much less slept with you and then avoided you afterward.”

It feels like a punch to the gut. You suck in a sharp breath before responding. “Yeah, well, good to hear you admit it was a mistake. Have a fantastic fucking night,” you mutter, scooping your shoes and your bag into your arms and heading back toward the door.

“[Y/N],” he calls after you, holding you back by your upper arm.

“Let go of me!” You manage to shake your arm free from his admittedly light grasp, but you knock yourself off balance doing so. Your shoes and bag tumble to the floor, the contents of your bag spilling out onto the surface. You close your eyes and hold your breath, mentally preparing to hit the hardwood flooring, but the impact never comes.

When you cautiously open your eyes, his face is only inches away. He has one arm wrapped around your waist, and you realize he’s what kept you from hitting the ground. You see something flash in his eyes as you look at him- he either feels sorry for you or he feels sorry for what he did to you. You’re not sure what to think. You can’t think; you can’t even breathe with him this close to you.

“You didn’t let me finish,” he states calmly as he stands, pulling you up onto your feet.

His arm rests loosely around your waist and you take a few steps back, letting his arm drop away and creating some distance between you two.

“What else is there to say?”

“Just- I want you to understand,” Rafa says, eyes soft. “I do care about you. That’s why I’ve been distancing myself. I was worried about what the other professors would say to me, or even worse, worried they’d say something to you. It isn’t as simple as wanting each other, [Y/N].”

You look down at your bare feet, swallowing around the lump forming in your throat. “Why can’t it be? Why does this have to be difficult?”

He sighs and you can hear him take a halting step toward you. You peek back up at him just enough to see his arms outstretched, ready to hold you. Without a moment’s hesitation you shuffle forward into his arms, your cheek pressed against his chest.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” he murmurs, a hand passing in a soothing caress over your back. “I’m so sorry that I did. I thought maybe a bit of time would help me forget the feelings I had for you, so everything could go back to the way it was. But every time I saw you in class, every time we passed each other on the stairs, all I could think about was how wrong I was.”

“I’m glad you were wrong,” you mutter into the thin black cotton of his t-shirt.

“Me too.”

You can hear the smile in his voice, and you lift your head from your chest to look up at him.

“Do you really mean that? I mean, do you want feelings for me? Do you want something that’s not simple?”

“Simple is boring,” Rafa smirks, bringing a hand up to cup your cheek. His thumb traces a feather-light stroke over your cheekbone as his glance flits down to your lips.

Your eyes slide closed as he leans closer to you, and even though you can’t see it, you can sense his mouth just millimeters from your own. You breathe in his scent- clean laundry and mint, the faintest hint of scotch.

His lips finally press against yours and you respond in turn. Electricity surges up and down your spine while his mouth moves in sync with yours. You reach up and lock your arms behind his neck, molding your body to his.

The kiss starts out slow and gentle, tongues brushing against each other tenderly, but turns into something hotter, something more desperate. Rafa’s hands drift down your sides and over your ass as the heat simmering between you two turns to a boil.

His hands move down to your upper thighs and he lifts you up, taking a few steps. Your back collides with the wall and his lips meet your neck. You wrap your legs around his waist and your arms around his shoulders, tilting your head with a soft moan when he nips at your pulse point.

Rafael takes a few steps backwards with you still held in his arms and turns, steering the two of you through the short distance to his bedroom. He sets you down on your feet and spins around to his dresser, grabbing a foil packet out of a small wooden box.

You smirk as you watch him glide back to you and lean in to kiss you. You stop his lips with your pointer finger and nudge him backward toward the bed.

He falls backward, situating himself and raising an eyebrow at you. He takes in a breath to say something, but stops himself when you start to slowly peel off your shirt.

You drop the shirt on the floor and hook your thumbs into the waistband of your skirt. Rafa watches you intently, biting down on his lower lip. Shimmying your hips slightly, you push the skirt down over your hips and it falls in a pool around your feet. He pulls his own shirt over his head carefully, avoiding his glasses.

Taking a few steps toward the bed, you reach behind you to unclasp your bra. The straps slide down your arms and as you place one knee on the edge of the bed, you let it plummet to the floor.

Clad in just your lacy thong, you crawl so you’re straddling him and press your mouth to his hungrily.

He reacts ardently, kissing you back while his hands briefly caress your breasts before wandering to your thighs. You rock your hips down to grind against him and he nips at your bottom lip.

Rafa’s hand slides between your legs and he rubs at your entrance, fingers skimming over your panties. You moan against his lips and pull back slightly, inching your way down his body.

You tug his pajama pants and boxers down his thighs, taking his member in your hand and moving in one long stroke. Wrapping your lips around the head and gliding down, you envelop as much of him in your mouth as you can manage. You bob your head a couple of times, your hand servicing the part of him that your mouth can’t cover.

Receding off of him, you crawl up to kiss him again. His fingers tangle slightly in your hair, holding your face closer to him as your tongues mingle.

Rafael groans lightly into your mouth as you pump his cock a few more times with your hand.

He untangles his fingers from your hair and reaches for the condom, tearing the foil open. You hear the crinkling of the wrapper and look up, taking the condom and rolling it over him slowly.

“You’re sure?” He asks quietly, a finger hooking under your chin and angling your face toward him.

You smile softly, studying the tenderness in his eyes and lean forward to give him a brief peck on the lips. “I’m sure.”

He captures your lips in a longer, more passionate kiss as he rubs you through your panties again. His fingers tug the fabric to the side and you descend onto him, both of you moaning as he bottoms out.

After a moment to adjust, you begin to ride him, circling your hips. He begins to thrust up into you, his fingers digging into your hips.

“[Y/N],” he moans. “Oh fuck, baby girl, you feel so good.”

“Rafa,” you whimper, placing your hands on his chest for leverage. You trace his tattoo momentarily before picking up the speed of your hips.

One of his hands weaves into your hair again, pulling your mouth against his in a fervent kiss. His other hand rests on your waist as he lifts his torso off the bed slightly, head dropping down to leave open-mouthed kisses over your breasts.

“Oh,” you gasp, your head falling back slightly at the sensation. You lift yourself off of him momentarily, the two of you working in tandem to slide your thong off.

Rafael positions his member so that he can slip back inside you, fucking up into you hard and fast when he does. You moan loudly as his hands grasp at the flesh of your ass.

“I want you coming, [Y/N],” he grunts, one hand moving to rub at your clit. “I want you to come for me so many times tonight. Can you handle that, baby girl?”

You nod, your hands reaching up to fondle your own breasts. “Yes, sir, anything for you.”

“Good girl,” he praises, driving himself into you harder.

You roll your nipples between your thumb and forefinger, a whimper escaping you. You’re close and you know he can tell - you’ve only been with him one other time but he already knows how to play your body like it’s a fine instrument, one he’s trained on his entire life.

He presses the pad of his thumb firmly against your clit, grazing back and forth.

You take a couple shaky breaths, your body lighting up like a livewire. With one final thrust, your orgasm burns through your stomach and you mewl his name.

“That’s my good girl,” Rafa murmurs, fucking you through your orgasm.

As you’re coming down, he flips you onto your back and hovers over you. He leans most of his weight onto one arm and uses his other hand to trace gently over your hip.

“Let me know when you’re ready for me to keep going,” he says quietly, pressing gentle, chaste kisses along your collarbone and over your shoulder.

You hum gently, giving him a nod a few moments later.

“Ready.”

Three orgasms later (two more for you and one for him) he pulls the covers up over the two of you. You roll over so your head rests in the crook of his neck, your fingers lazily tracing over his tattoo.

“I never could’ve guessed you had tattoos from the way you dress in class,” you say sleepily.

“Mm,” he hums and turns his head to press a kiss into your hair. “That’s kinda the point. Gotta look professional and shit.”

You huff a small laugh as your eyes drift closed.

“Do you have plans for tomorrow?” He wonders in a hushed voice.

You yawn and shake your head minutely. “Have to watch a movie for a class, but that’s it.”

“What movie? Wait, what class? Am I supposed to be assigning movies as homework now?”

“In Cold Blood, for my drama and film class. And no,” you giggle. “You don’t have to assign movies as homework.”

“Good,” he sweeps his hand through your hair. “I actually have that movie, if you want to stay and watch it with me.” He twirls a lock of your hair around a finger.

“Something tells me I’ll be pretty distracted if I-” you pause to yawn again. “If I stay here to watch it.”

“I promise I’ll behave,” he chuckles breezily. “But go to sleep. We’ll talk more in the morning.”

You let out a contented little hum and drift to sleep.

When you wake up the next morning, you can hear the shower running faintly. You manage to peel your eyes open, and the morning light streaming in through the window immediately provokes the inevitable hangover headache. You groan slightly, rolling over, and take in your surroundings.

A small smile finds its way to your lips when you notice a glass of water and bottle of advil on the bedside table, along with a sticky note.

“Just in case,” the note says, with a tiny smile etched next to it.

You sit up and take the pain relievers, drinking most of the water along with them.

Rafael pads out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his hips.

“Hey,” you look up at him.

“Hi,” he smiles at you before opening his drawer to pull out clothes. “You can shower if you want, I put a towel on the rack for you. I’ll start breakfast while you’re in there.”

You stand and walk up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist and pressing a kiss to his shoulder. “Thank you.”

You shower quickly and head back through Rafa’s room, where he’s set out a folded pair of his sweatpants and a shirt for you to wear. You slip them on and shuffle into the kitchen.

Rafael is sitting at the counter, a full plate of food in front of him and one at the place next to him. He peers down at a book lying on the counter, held open with his left hand while his right is clasped around a piece of bacon.

You sit next to him quietly, not wanting to disturb his reading, and begin to eat.

“I found that movie, if you want to watch it here,” he says a bit later, placing a bookmark to hold his spot. “But I understand if you want to go back to your place and watch it by yourself, too.”

You smile before taking a sip of your coffee. “I’d rather watch it here.”

“I was hoping you’d say that,” he beams and leans over, pressing a kiss to your temple.

The two of you migrate to the living room after breakfast and settle on the couch. You sit upright with your legs propped up on the coffee table, and he spreads out horizontally on the couch, his head resting gently in your lap. You click a few buttons on the remote and watch as the previews begin to roll.

"Your hair is lighter when it isn't full of that product you use," you murmur, fingers brushing through his hair.

"Is it?" he mumbles back. He gently flips over so he's looking up at you from your lap, eyes blinking sleepily.

"Mhm," you hum. You're suddenly overwhelmed by just how endearing this situation is. Rafael's head resting on your lap, hair soft and just barely damp from his shower, his drowsy eyes trained on your face. When he yawns, you're certain your heart lurches forward and crashes through your ribcage, tumbling out onto the floor.

You lightly brush a strand of hair that had fallen onto his forehead away and lean down, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips.

"You can rest," you say softly, fingertips tracing over the side of his neck. "I know you've probably seen this movie hundreds of times. You don't have to stay awake just because I need to watch it for a class."

He shakes his head and turns back around so he's facing the tv, head still at home on your thighs. "I want to watch it with you. I love- wait, what is this again?"

You chuckle and rub your hand in circles over his shoulder blades. "In Cold Blood. Truman Capote. For my drama and film class."

"Professor Hopewell?"

"Lynchburg," you correct. "Hopewell is Russian literature."

He hums and nods, not answering you.

It isn't until Hicock confesses to the crime and turns on Smith, nearly an hour later, that you realize his breathing has evened out. A smile creeps across your face as you peer down at him, fingers feathering over his sleeping profile.

"I think I could fall in love with you, if you let me," you say quietly.

#rafa x reader #rafael casal x reader #rafael casal #hamilcast x reader #yes i know not technically but no one cares

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literary-lioness · 4 years

Text

Nanowrimo Day 9

This morning I was thinking about how behind I have felt in working on this novel and how bothered I had let myself become about not making my daily goals and word counts, and I realized something. Stressing about this was making me dread writing. Normally I have a pretty good time writing, I enjoy it, but I have not felt that way in the past few days, which is a big problem.

My solution? Forget word counts and just enjoy writing again. Don’t get me wrong, I plan to continue working on this project, but if I don't finish all 50,000 words, or the story itself ends up being shorter than 50,000 words? I’m not going to stress about it. Again, I still hope to finish the 50k, but I’m not going to sacrifice my love of writing to do it. Anyways, here is what I wrote today.

Nanowrimo Word Count: 12230

VII

Emery

Emery and Bucky were taking their nightly walk down main street, when Emery’s phone rang. She stopped walking to pull her phone out of her jacket pocket and check the caller id. Bucky pulled on his leash a little bit before stopping with a huff, one leg stuck straight backward in his funny little snow boot walk. He looked at her indignantly as if to say, first you make me wear these ridiculous things on my feet and now you make me stop walking?

“Sorry, bud. It’s Lauren,” Emery said apologetically. She hit the green accept button and put the phone up to her ear, “Hello?”

“I am dying over here, Em. Spiiillll,” Lauren said into the phone.

“So dramatic,” Emery laughed.

She resumed her walk knowing that Lauren had no intention of letting her off easy.

“I am not dramatic! But, you defiantly made me wait too long!”

“She’s dramatic,” She heard Dave say in the background.

“Hush, you. Ok, so tell me about the very gorgeous Quinn Stone.”

Emery felt her cheeks heat, “There is nothing to tell.”

“Bullshit, tell me.”

“She really just came so that I could show her some of her niece’s work, and then she left. She was there for less than five minutes, and that’s about it.”

“Uhuh, and then?”

“What makes you think there is an ‘and then’?”

“’That’s about it’ is Emery code for, ‘there are other pieces of this story that I have not yet told you’.”

“Unfair.”

“Whatever, just tell meeee.”

“When I was leaving, she and Daisy were throwing snowballs around, one hit me, and I might have engaged with them.”

“Oh, spicy, a sexy snowball fight.”

“Jesus, Lo, you heard the part where her niece, my student, was there correct?”

“Admittedly it was out of my mouth before I could stop it.”

“I see that,” Emery said chuckling.

“And that was it?”

“Yeah, that was it.”

“Ok, so, you’re totally into her right.”

Emery heaved a sigh, “I wouldn’t say totally.”

Lauren screeched in delight, “I knew it! I saw the way you looked at her in when you walked in, all wistful.”

“Knock it off, even if I am into her, I’m not going there.”

“What?! Why?”

“Well first of all, her niece is in my class, so that would be weird.”

“Weak! Next reason.”

“What? That’s not weak, it’s a valid concern, what if it causes a conflict of interest! Imagine how weird it would be if I gave Daisy a poor grade and then I had to face Quinn? What if she asked me to give Daisy a better grade?”

“Does Quinn strike you as that type of person?”

“Well no, but I mean, what if?”

“Like I said, weak.”

“Ok, well what about Daisy? She might now want her teacher and aunt to date. She’s my student first and foremost, I want her to feel comfortable in my class.”

“While more valid, still weak. What if Daisy doesn’t care or is happy about it?”

“Ugh, you’re turning it around on me.”

“I’m just asking a different ‘what if’ than you, so if we’re done with that scenario. What is your next reason?” Lauren asked.

“Ok, well I don’t know if she is interested,” Emery said.

“That-is actually fair. I defiantly didn’t get a vibe from her one way or the other.”

“Maybe because you were too busy staring?”

“I was not,” Lauren said indignantly.

“You were.”

“Fine, maybe a little. Anyways, I get where you’re coming from, but I think you should put yourself out there.”

“Lauren, I literally met this woman three days ago, and on two of the three occasions we met, it wasn’t exactly pleasant.”

“And yet, here we are.”

Emery groaned, “I just don’t think it’s the right move.”

“Ok, but just like, be open to it?”

“Maybe,” Emery said. She paused when she saw a familiar figure walking toward her. Jade. Great. “Hey, Lo, can I call you back?”

“Sure, but be warned! I shall not be made to wait too long again!”

“Drama Queen,” Emery said and hung the phone up.

Bucky started growling, his hackles rising as Jade drew closer.

“Bucky, you know me,” Jade said, trying to play nice with the little Frenchie.

“And he doesn’t like you,” Emery said firmly.

Jade’s laugh sounded forced and Emery had to fight the urge to draw away from her, “He never really did, huh?”

Emery shrugged, “I can’t say that I blame him.”

“Ah, don’t be like that. I saw you walking and wanted to say hi to you.”

“Pleasantry received. Look it’s cold, and I need to get Bucky home. I’ll catch you later.”

Jade bit her bottom lip in what she probably felt was a seductive manner, but the only effect it had on Emery was to make her stomach roil, “Maybe I could walk you home.” She ended the statement with a wink. Clearly, Jade thought she had a chance of seeing the inside of Emery’s apartment.

“No,” Emery said in a tone that would have shut down anyone else.

“Ah, Em, don’t be like that,” Jade said reaching out to touch her arm and step closer to her.

Emery pulled her arm back and wrapped her arms tightly around her torso. She stepped away despite her efforts to hold her ground, “Leave me alone Jade.”

Jade leaned closer to her still, “Ah, but we had so much fun last time.”

Emery shivered, shame and regret washed over her. She knew exactly what Jade was referring to, and it wasn’t something she liked to dwell on. Bucky let another threatening growl fill the space between them. He had never bit anyone, but in that moment, she wished he would just take a little bite out of Jade’s leg.

“Ms. Webster!” A yell of joy ripped through the air, and Jade immediately drew back

Emery looked past Jade to her savior, and saw Daisy barreling toward her. She caught the little girl in her arms and help her tightly like the lifeline she was, “Hey Daisy.”

She looked up from Daisy and saw Quinn walking toward them with her hands in the front of a black Nike hoodie. Emery had never been so glad to see other people before.

Quinn looked from Emery to Jade and raised an eyebrow, “Everything ok, here?”

Jade forced a smile onto her face, “Of course, I was just offering to walk Emery home. I don’t think we’ve met; my name is Jade.” She stuck her hand out toward Quinn.

For a moment Emery thought Quinn wouldn’t take Jade’s hand, but she shook it briefly, “Quinn.”

Quinn looked back at Emery and asked more directly, “Are you ok?”

Emery’s throat felt dry, Quinn was offering her a lifeline, she took it, she gave her head a small shake. Quinn raised an eyebrow and turned back to Jade, “You know, I think Daisy and I can handle walking Emery home.”

Jade’s eyes narrowed, “Excuse-.”

Quinn cut her off, “You’re excused. Have a good night.”

Daisy, who Emery was still holding onto said, “Um, Ms. Webster? You have to let me go if we’re gonna walk you home.”

“Oh! Sorry honey,” she released Daisy and turned toward the direction of her apartment, “I’m this way.”

Quinn nodded stoically and walked closely beside her. So closely that she could smell the pleasant scent of cinnamon wafting from her.

“Ms. Webster? May I walk your dog please?”

“Sure, he’s a good boy, just make sure you keep an eye on him, if he sees a cat he might try to chase it,” she said handing Daisy the leash.

“Is that how he ended up in the street the other night?” Quinn asked, casting a sideways glance at her.

“Unfortunately.”

They walked a little further, the silence wasn’t uncomfortable, but Emery could feel the questions hanging in the air between them, “Thank you, by the way, for the save.”

“Thank Daisy, she’s the one who saw you when we came out of Sam’s.”

“Still, you helped.”

“You’re welcome. You looked pretty shaken up, I couldn’t leave you there. Who was that jerk anyways?”

“My ex, she doesn’t seem to realize that all parts of the relationship are over.”

“Ah, the worst,” Quinn said.

“The very worst,” Emery replied.

They continued to walk in silence, Emery’s hand brushed the back of Quinn’s, and she felt her cheeks heat at the simple contact. She had to fight against doing it again, or worse, grabbing Quinn’s hand. Finally they reached her apartment building, “Well, this is me.”

“Woah! You live in a tall building, Ms. Webster,” Daisy said in wide eyed amazement.

“I do! Except, I only live in a small part of this tall building,” she said smiling.

“Oh, neat!”

Quinn laughed, “Alright Daisy, tell Ms. Webster goodnight so we can head back.”

Daisy gave her a third hug, “Bye Ms. Webster!”

“Bye Daisy,” she turned her eyes to Quinn, “Bye, Quinn and thank you again.”

“Bye,” Quinn said simply, before taking Daisy’s hand and walking back toward Sam’s pizza.

Emery picked Bucky up and carried him up the stairs to their studio. When she got inside, she closed the door and leaned against it for support. Maybe totally was the correct word to describe just how into Quinn she was. She sighed and thought about calling Lauren but didn’t. Lauren would call when she wanted to talk anyways, and right now Emery just needed a moment to collect herself.

She thought about Jade and their encounter. She wished that she had never muddied the waters after their break-up, somehow leading Jade to believe her door was open anytime she wanted. She knew she needed to get the situation with Jade under control, she didn’t ever want a repeat of those three minutes before Daisy and Quinn had saved her.

She felt her heart do a flip when she thought of Quinn. She had saved Emery. With a single look she was able to tell that she needed help and hadn’t hesitated to swoop in to save her. That doesn’t mean she’s into you, crazy. Emery told herself, though that didn’t seem to stop her brain from thinking fondly of the red-headed woman. Of her soft hand, or her inviting lips.

Emery’s eyes widened at the thought, and she shook her head. She forced the thought of kissing Quinn out of her mind. She refocused on all the reasons she would never get involved with Quinn Stone. The only probably was that now, as Lauren had said, they sounded weak.

She turned the TV on as a distraction and flipped to Hallmark, they would be showing some sappy Christmas movie with a woman leaving her inattentive suit-wearing boyfriend, for the handsome, small-town carpenter that would defiantly take her mind off Quinn. Except the one that was showing was about a small-town doctor. Emery sighed, settled into her sofa, and accepted that the universe was going to force her to think about a woman she had sworn she wouldn’t get involved with as penance for her misdeeds.

#nanowrimo #nanowrimo 2019 #literarylionesswriting #fiction #lesbian #christmas novel #word count 12230

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jess-oh · 6 years

Text

Reflection

Hey journal!

I’m still keeping up with this and I’m doing pretty well! I’ll probably shower after this since I have a 9am class tomorrow morning that I don’t want to be late for! I gotta get into the habit of just rolling out of bed once my alarm goes off instead of hitting “snooze” one too many times! It’s such a bad habit! T A T I just gotta do it! Yeah, I’ll have some extra time but that’s more time I could be dedicating to reading my discipline book or the Bible! I’ve been using the fact that I don’t have a physical Bible anymore as an excuse but I really do want to get into the habit of doing my QTs again! I had a pretty long first day today but it was rather fulfilling! I started the day off at work with Scott and Thor and did my best to be attentive and do a good job! I arrived about 15min before 8am and set everything up, I got along well with Thor and Scott, I was enthusiastic and focused, and overall, I felt pretty good! I was in a rush after work because I wanted to go downstairs, get my ID, heat up my pizza, and check when lockers would be available for check on the ninth floor...all in the 15min gap between work and class. Except, I got off of work a little late and forgot my phone and the elevators were taking too long so that didn’t exactly work out. Instead, I just stopped by the 9th floor and ate my cold pizza for lunch! I was planning on hanging out with Thor pretty closely but I actually became incredibly toxic with my old friends from past classes. It was so easy to fall into gossip and feeling confident and better than everyone else and I could tell that it really turned off Thor. Guy, our teacher, reminded me of Bruce Banner aka the Hulk today, haha. But he seems like a good teacher! He’s very upfront, which I appreciate, and I am looking forward to his class. I just need to get better at speaking up and not going with the flow of talking shit on others and just doing the best that I can now. I don’t want to be like those cliques that are “too cool” for everyone else and just keep to themselves! I want to be welcoming and reach out to others and make sure no one ever feels left out. But yeah! We were assigned our first project today which is going to be a 32-paged minimum magazine and I’ve been wrestling with what to do it on. As of right now, I am really enjoying the concept of automatic drawings and how fluid they are so I was thinking of somehow incorporating psychology or making this a self help book of sorts with automatic drawing flowing throughout to show how we are all interconnected as people! I think it’s a pretty cool concept. I just need to brush it up a bit and solidify my vision and make a vision board for both that and something else! And then we’ll see what Guy says next Tuesday. After that, I took the elevator down with Guy, Sara, and Anna Kunz. I went out at first before realizing that I had two hours to kill since Guy let us out early and decided to head back in and work on my concept for a bit longer on the ninth floor instead. There, I saw Sara again and kept her company as I continued to brainstorm. We chatted for a bit and she showed me a couple funny videos and then went off to do her own thing while I chose to stay behind. Honestly, I took a 10min nap before heading to the SDI around 4:30pm and thankfully, there were people there! I immediately clicked really well with everyone and felt incredibly confident and charismatic. Tina seemed pretty nervous today but maybe it was just because she was in such a rush! But yeah! Our icebreakers went really well and I lowkey carried my team throughout the competition. Then, we all headed downstairs to go to Chinatown together before realizing that Joyce was missing! We waited for a bit at first before Tina gave me the go to take the lead instead. I unfortunately cut my conversation with Janae short as a result which I was pretty sad about but was able to pick up a new conversation relatively quickly. We ran into a bit of a problem with one of the transfer students and tried buying a ticket at first for her but the line was pretty long. Thankfully, Esa offered to cover her fare and just swiped her in instead! We then went downstairs and barely missed the 95th train and had to wait a bit for the next one but it’s okay bc that gave Joyce time to join us! I also joked around with Mulan and surprisingly got along really well with her! Honestly, I was surprised that she showed up today at all and I was more surprised to see Claire so happy to see her bc I know things were kinda tense between the two of them last year. But even at Joy Yee, I saw Joyce getting along with Mulan and that REALLY surprised me. I guess they’ve put all the drama of last year behind them! I’m glad. When we got to Chinatown, we had to sort through who we were missing and decided to head in while I waited outside for Esa who took a crazy long time. Tbh, Sofia’s comment about how my blue dress is the perfect combination of “classic and sexy” took me by surprise earlier today and I kept thinking about it. I never was one to label myself as “sexy” and it just spoke to all my insecurities about how I’m not at all sexy and how I’ve been raised to go against that “vision.” That I should be more conservative in the eyes of the Lord so that statement really bothered me. But the more I looked at it, the more I could see what she was talking about. And the more uncomfortable I felt with wearing it. How did I go from being so over the top in love with the dress before and now I feel so incredibly afraid and insecure to wear it? It’s not like I’m going to a church wedding or anything. It’s family! Why does it matter? But then I was worried that everytime I bent down to write something while checking people in, they would see my boobs from above and think I was thirsty when really it’s just the dress and really just got in my own head about it all. Mitchell came to keep me company for a bit while I waited for Esa and gave me their number. I immediately texted and called them to only hear no response. Later, Joyce came out since the food had come and invited me in since they were taking so long. So I agreed and went in. I mostly talked with the new transfer student across from me, JO, and this other graphic design major. We made white people jokes, joked about how much onion JO got on his plate in comparison to mine and the other GD guy, and much much more. I was really able to laugh along with them and I was happy! They cheered me on as I attempted to finish my meal and we all laughed in fellowship as one. Esa eventually texted me back and let me know that they actually walked all the way to Roosevelt to get to a PNC ATM to pay for the food and was jogging back to Chinatown shortly after. Thankfully, the food came only a few minutes before Esa finally joined us! Me and the other GD kid waited a while for our good but it was so good and well worth the wait! I was happy! We then all headed to the bakery across the street and I offered to buy something for the GD kid since it was his birthday recently and I felt pretty good about doing it! I wasn’t planning on getting anything for myself but Joyce offered and I accepted, haha. I really should’ve said no but I was still happy to have paid for his food, even if I didn’t get any pastries too. I was fine with the decision that I had made to sacrifice my own money to make him feel welcome and special. Then, I got on the red line from Chinatown to go back home and as I was getting off, this lady that was talking on the phone yelled at me! But I didn’t realize it at first. I thought she was still just talking on the phone because she was already speaking pretty loudly. But once I realized what she had said, I quickly apologized and claimed that I didn’t even know I bumped into her before getting off at my stop. She said something along the lines of, “You don’t just bump into someone and not say excuse me! That’s incredibly rude!” And I was so taken aback at how serious she was because I really didn’t even realize that I had hit her! But her words kept ringing in my ears again and again and again while I waited for the bus and on the way to my apartment. I did feel pretty bad. I could’ve been offended and immediately retaliated. Or, I could’ve sucked up my pride and just accepted it. In the end, I chose to accept it. Once I got home, I immediately went to the restroom because I had to pee SO BAD. Then I joined Emily in her room and she showed me videos of her as a child and I showed her how to put in maintenance requests! I then checked the mailbox, hoping my paycheck and/or package would be there but unfortunately, it was not. So I finally sent the text to Jon asking for when I should be expecting my stuff. Then I took the cakes out, we watched some old childhood shows, put frosting on the cake, I get pieces for us both with marshmallows, headed back to her room, and finally ate the cake. It actually wasn’t that bad! I’d eat it again, 10/10. Jk. More like 7/10 but still, not bad! Then we watched a few episodes of Kipper and Caillou and then I showed her a commentary on Caillou which we both laughed hysterically at! I forgot how funny it was, HAHA. Then we listened to some trap remixes and watched other videos and laid on her rug. I was falling asleep as she read her class syllabus. Then, I decided to get up and go to my room and take care of some things and prepared to review tomorrow’s schedule and set my alarms. I heard Rhyarna and Eliza come in and wanted to say hi but I also really wanted to get some stuff done so when they asked to come in, I just let them. Rhyarna helped me tape my fuijfilms and polaroids onto the wall and gave me a taco! So nice. Then, I chatted with Eliza and Rhyarna for a bit in Eliza’s room before heading back out to do the dishes, brainstorm a bit more for Publication Design, and type my reflection. And now here I am. I have a 9am class aka Negotiation Skills and a 1-4:50pm class aka Graphic Design III. I am looking forward to GD III with Dawn and my other friends and Negotiation Skills sounds like it would be fun, so. I’m looking forward to it! Woo!

#reflection

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therealestatesparkblog · 6 years

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How Adopting 7 Kids at Once Led Me to Launch My Real Estate Investing Career

The truth is that I did not get involved in real estate in a meaningful way until later in my life. I have been a chiropractic physician for 29 years, but Im really an entrepreneur at heart. I have started or purchased six multi-discipline medical clinics in my career and have been involved in a number of other businesses. None, however, have matched the combination of relative safety and potential returns afforded by real estate. Still, for some reason, I could never pull the trigger and launch my real estate investing career. Unfortunately I sat on the sidelines for a number of years. I hoped to get started but never did. Like many of you, I read Robert Kiyosakis Rich Dad Poor Dadand a few other real estate books, but it wasnt enough. Looking back now, I can point to several life events that lit a fire under me and finally got me off the bench and into the game. Over the past few years, I have flipped a couple houses, owned a small apartment complex, developed a large commercial retail strip center, syndicated a 125-door multifamily townhome complex, and am just finishing the co-syndication of a large self-storage deal. I am in my 50s and wish I had started earlier. No matter your age, though, if you are procrastinating like I did, hopefully you can use one or more of the following five steps to get started. 5 Steps to Launch Your Real Estate Career1. Find your passion. Twenty years ago, my wife and I became interested in adoption. We had two biological kids at the time and wanted to adopt a third child. While working with an organization that facilitated the adoption of Eastern European orphans, we heard about a sibling group of seven Russian children that the Russian government was going to split up and send to three different countries. My wife decided she would make it her personal mission to find a family that could keep these siblings from being separated. The idea of someone taking that many kids into their home blew us away, and we made a list of all of our friends and acquaintances that we thought might be able to afford such a monumental task. The Russian government announced they would be separating the children in a few months. As the date approached with no takers in sight, we began to ask ourselves if there was any way we could adopt them ourselves. Its a very long story, but fast forward to August of 1988. We were told at the U.S. Embassy that we had completed the single largest adoption in U.S./Russian history (at a single time). It was a big culture shock to bring seven Russian speaking kids into our home for sure. But the real shock was just around the corner when the financial reality of our decision began to hit home. Nine sets of clothing, nine bikes, nine soccer teams, nine college educations, nine weddingsyou get the picture. The financial pressure began to build. I rapidly set out on a course to produce more income. I started or purchased six different medical clinics. I developed anathletic club, which eventually grew to 1,500 members. I purchased a sports performance enhancement franchise. And we even started a coffee shop/deli. Some produced more cash flow than others, but the one problem all those businesses had in common was that they took immense amounts of my personal time. I was fairly successful at creating additional income, but I was killing myself. My family life was suffering. I quickly realized working 70-80 hours a week would not work. There are few things that I am more passionate about than my family, so I threw myself into a massive search for ways to create passive income. It was this search that eventually led me to real estate. You can do the same thing. Figure out what you are passionate about. Focus on the end results. Getfired up and use that passion to fuel your real estate dreams.

Related: If I Started My Real Estate Business Again Today, THIS is What Id Change 2. Harness fear. As humans, nothing makes us react quite like fear. Fear comes in all shapes and sizes. There are literally hundreds of types of fears and phobiasfear of pain, of disease, of injury, of tight spaces, of rejection, and of failure, to name a few. People will do just about anything to avoid their fears. If they are forced to face fear, they go into fight or flight mode or they are paralyzed by fear and do nothing at all. Fortunately, a random encounter with a couple of patients changed my investing mindset forever. It was March 6, 2009, and the stock market was in the final throes of its great crash. I walked into a treatment room, and there sat a patient with tears streaming down his face. It was odd because this was a big burly guy who had just retired from a local factory and was a pretty tough character. I soon found out he was not crying because of his back or neck pain but because he had just lost almost all of his retirement savings in the stock market. Apparently, this gentleman had taken his retirement payments as a lump sum and had recently dumped it all in the market. As he sat on my exam table, he explained how in a few short days, he had lost more than 70 percent of his retirement savings, and those savings had taken him 40 years to amass! I am not usually at a loss for words, but nothing in my medical training could have prepared me for that moment. A couple of days later, I was seeing another patient. Mrs. Smith (not her real name) was a 50-something retired school teacher and seemed to be in a better mood than normal. I noticed her cheerfulness and asked her why she seemed so happy. She went on to explain how she and her husband had taken all of their retirement funds out of the stock market about a year previously and had used the funds to buy rental property. Their rentals were leased, and frankly, they were really enjoying retirement. Fortunate to have gotten out of the market when they did, this new landlord was not affected by the downturn in the markets at all. I had really never trusted the stock market. I mean, with the almost-daily headlines of one major bank after another caught cheating their clients or gaming the system somehow, this ladys message really hit home with me. Even so, I had always been too afraid of missing out on that once-in-a-lifetime Amazon or Microsoft stock pick to shift my investing away from the stock market. Right then and there, it finally hit home. When it came to real estate, I was afraid to make a mistake that would cost me money. Since I was not sure when or where to start, I just sat doing nothing for years. I had analysis paralysis, but I realized I was much more scared of ending up like my first patient, crying in a doctors office somewhere having lost the majority of my retirement. I finally made a commitment that real estate would be my investment vehicle of choice. 3. Find your motivation. A few years back, an MRI revealed I had a torn rotator cuff, torn labrum, and arthritis in my shoulder. Decades of occupational abuse and years of chasing baseball scholarships had taken their toll. My orthopedic physician announced I could either give up my chiropractic career immediately, or in about four years, I would need a shoulder replacement. Suddenly, I was heading toward for an untimely retirement. I was shocked. I had dedicated the last 29 years of my life to helping people heal. My entire identity was tied up in being a healthcare provider. At the same time, Obamacare was rapidly eroding away my practice of two-plus decades. I had no idea what I would do, but knew I needed a plan and needed one quick. After much angst and a considerable amount of prayer, I decided it was time to jump in with both feet. I still have a medical practice, but am working full-time on a plan to exit healthcare as soon as possible. Even though I didnt recognize it at the time, life circumstances helped me find my motivation. Each individual has their own unique mix of life experiences and desires that fuel their drive for success. For some, its the thought of a penniless retirement. For others, it is the commitment to never let their children grow up in poverty (like they did). Some people say that success is a lake home or traveling the world. Others have an altruistic motivation to give back to those less fortunate. There are 1,001 books on ramping up personal motivation. For me, however, it boils down to a very simple concept: Focusing on my goals 10 times more than I focus on the roadblocks. Every time I run up against what seems like an insurmountable roadblock, I pull out my list of goals and focus on what I want to accomplish. Time spent focusing on what matters most turbocharges my motivation levels. The roadblocks seem to work themselves out. Whats your motivation? Related: How to Jumpstart Your Investing Career as a Multifamily Deal Finder 4. Hire a mentor. Every athlete from t-ball to the big leagues has a coach. They need someone they can learn from who is more experienced. Someone who knows the ins and outs of the game. Its no different in real estate. If you are serious about learning the craft, you need to find someone to teach you the ropes. When I finally got serious, I hired a mentor. I knew if I spent my hard-earned money on a program, I would take it seriously. There are lots of mentors and training programs on BiggerPockets. For me, I knew the more expensive the program, the more commitment I was likely to have. I am not talking about a weekend seminar with a few handouts. I chose a company called 37th Parallel Properties. Their program is a comprehensive year-long mentorship. It includes visits to real assets across the country (much like getting an MBA in multifamily investing). Dont get me wrongnot everyone needs to pay for a mentor, but dont attempt to go it alone. Learn from someone elses mistakes. Its one of the many reasons I am such a big fan of BiggerPockets. You can learn so much just by hanging out in the community and reading the advice of experienced investors. Whether you hope to invest in single family homes, self-storage units, large multifamily communities, or mobile home parks, there is always someone with expertise willing to share.

5.Leverage the experience of others. Maybe you dont need to change careers like me. Maybe you just want to use commercial real estate to turbocharge your portfolio. Maybe you just want to be a passive investor and have very little interest in toilets, tenants, and trash. If you are an accredited or sophisticated investor, syndicated deals may be the best approach for you. Some companies offer syndicated real estate investments. They specialize in sourcing lucrative real estate assets and packaging them up for passive investors. They typically underwrite the project, perform all due diligence, line up debt, and complete the purchase. The companies then operate and oversee these assets so that their investors can realize great profits minus the headaches. Choosing a company that you feel comfortable with is the key to any syndicated investment. While it is a much quicker way to jump into the fray, be careful! Take your time and choose the specific deal and syndicator carefully. Ask lots of questions and always check references. So, what is holding you back? Whats it going to take to get you off the sidelines? Dont procrastinate like I did! Hey, if an old chiropractor can do it

What motivation led to your first investment? What did your journey there look like? Take a moment to share what it took to make your first real estate investment! https://www.biggerpockets.com/renewsblog/seven-child-adoption-launch-real-estate-career

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