#if you're like 1 out of the like... 2 ppl that interacts with me i hope your day was nice <3

[thot4ellie]

oh sweetheart

pairing: boxer! ellie williams x f reader au

word count: 1.9k

rating: 18+

warnings: boxer!ellie, drinking, smoking, cursing, creepy guy but ellie comes to ur defense!! ellie has lots of tattoos, fighting, threats, idk if im missing anything (no character description or anything specific)

summary: you didn't expect to meet her on this night out.

authors notes: hi friends! this is my first time writing and posting on here hopefully you enjoy, please reblog, like or follow! lets be mutuals :) anyways feedback and constructive criticism is always welcome and appreciated! ellie williams has me on my hands and knees!!! i hope you enjoy! i like the idea of making this a series if it works out and ppl like it, so pls let m know!! thank you :)

PART 1 | part 2

series masterlist <3

from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸

READ: this account stands with palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. silence is complicity, do not scroll past this.

DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist. PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS.

loud. everything is loud. the smell of sweat and blood stains the air around you. the sounds of people cheering and shouting towards the center of the large room. the lights are buzzing above you as you are walking into the entrance of the shitty run down gym your brother, jesse, and his girlfriend, dina, ended up dragging you to tonight.

you didn't mind coming along with him but this wasn't what you expected to be doing tonight. after a long shitty week of unpacking your new apartment, you kinda just wanted to end up a hole in the wall bar and drink your stress away but he had other plans. which including watching grown men beat the shit of each other for their cut at the end of the night.

it was intimidating, walking through the crowds of people you didn't know until you finally make it to where his friends were waiting for you guys. they were sitting at a table with a clear shot of the fight which was surprising since the whole place seemed to have more people in it then it could fit. you make your way awkwardly to the empty seats saying a gentle "hello guys" to your brothers friends who you didn't knowl. you sat next to dina as jesse made his way to the bar with your drink orders.

after you graduated highschool, you moved to new york and spend 4 years there working in a small cafe you lived above but now at the start of the summer, still not sure what you should be doing with your life. now you're 22 and you've moved to the city of jackson to be closer to your older brother and his girlfriend. you were excited to start fresh in a place where no one knew you yet, you were ready to leave your old life and those toxic things in the past. but you wondered if it was even possible.

you spend the next hour talking with dina and catching up on the things that have happened since you moved, "have you started looking for jobs yet?" she asked as you both sipped on the second drink of the night that jesse went and brought back a bit ago. you've only met a couple times in person since they started dating about 2 years ago but you loved her, she was making this night a lot better. "not much luck yet, i don't know what to do, luckily i have some time to figure something out." you responded. she went to say something but then the loud speakers around the room started blaring music and the countdown to the match that was about to start.

jesse tapped dinas shoulder to go watch with the rest of them. dinas eyes met yours and asked, "are you coming up?" you started getting nervous as the people started getting louder and crowding towards the center ring and told her that you'll stay here and watch. they both nodded and said they'd be back when it was over.

you took this opportunity to finally go get some fresh air since the crowd isn't all over anymore and it was a straight shot to the door you came in, you walked over to the side of the building, definitely feeling the drinks you had, you let your back rest against the concrete wall, finally cooling you down on this hot summer night. there's people standing outside talking but they payed no attention to you. you stayed against the wall as you pull out the cigarette pack from the pocket of your thin dark green jacket and the lighter out of your back pocket in your jean shorts. you cursed yourself for not buying more but its a bad habit and you know it. you pulled one out and put it in your lips as you brought the lighter up and took a drag, finally letting the anxiety go as you stared off into the sky.

"excuse me miss, you shouldn't be out here alone, a beautiful girl like you," a man with a rough voice said but you didn't move to look, suddenly wishing you never left your apartment to begin with, "hello i'm talking to you, its not nice to ignore people, ya know," he slurred his words as he spoke. you turned your head as you went to tell him to leave you alone but instead, he was standing in front of you before you knew it you dropped your smoke and now he's practically cornered you.

he was so close you could smell the alcohol on his breathe as he spoke again, "now are you gonna talk to-" you leaned away from him as he was interrupted by the sound of a door opening a few feet away, he looked towards it but then turned back to you just as quick, almost touching you as he went to speak again but he was beat to it.

"get off her." you didn't even realize the door had opened until you heard her.

the man looked back towards the door to the figure in the light, he squinted and when he got a good look, he suddenly backed off and put his hands up. "hey hey i wasn't doing nothin- it was nothing!" he shouted back to whoever was next to the still open door, light shining into the alley.

the door slams and the light fades as the figure walks closer towards you and your eyes meet the deep green eyes of the person who just saved you as she turned to the man who was just cornering you against the wall.

"it doesn't look like nothing, i mean, really? you're fucking joking right?" she questioned him as she looked him right in the eyes.

"i said it was nothing- she was flirting with me and-" he was cut off as she laughed loudly. "yeah you're full of shit, get the fuck out of here and don't let me see you again or you'll regret it." she said as she stepped closer towards him, almost at the same height, he looked scared of her. "okay, okay- fuck 'm leaving!" he slurred one last time as he turned around and headed the opposite way of the run down gym.

you stood there as the interaction happened, not sure what to do or say yet, you were silent as he walked off, and those green eyes met yours again and you saw her lips moving as she was speaking but you caught nothing she said. "hey, you okay there?" she asked you as she went to stand in front of you, looking you up and down, checking if you're psychically okay while she gave you a second to process before she asked you again.

"hey sweetheart, you okay?" she asked and grabbed your arm, not in a way that the man would have but like she was actually making sure you were okay, and this time you finally heard her.

"h- yes im okay, just- fuck- yes thank you." you said finally getting a good look at her now that she's up close and touching you. her eyes were greener than you thought, her short auburn hair with some pulled back into a bun, the big moth tattoo wrapped around her right forearm that was still holding onto yours, other tattoos littered her arms and some poking out under her t-shirt she was wearing. she was so close to you and it sent butterflies through your body. now is not the time, you thought to yourself.

"are you sure- 'm sorry that happened, fuck him." she said roughly, not towards you but him.

"its okay, thank- thank you for helping me" you said gently to the girl who was still looking into your eyes. you had been so focused on hers that you didn't even see the tiny scars, small healing cuts and the bruises that were fading until you looked over her face again.

"yeah of course, are you here alone?" she asked you curiously still holding on to you, you weren't even phased by it. you told her you were here with your brother and she nodded her head towards the door, "lets get you back to him before anything else happens sweetheart" she said as she guided you to the door, hand on your back, as you swallowed and went first.

suddenly all the sounds that you had not realized you had been blocking begin again, smells of the sweaty bodies surround you again and you felt too hot, either because of her or the summer heat trapped in here. once you made it inside, she moved her hand off the small of your back and told her to go find your brother and to get home safe. when she walked away, you realized you didn't even know her name.

you saw dina, sitting along with a few of jesses friends and made your way over to her. the match must've ended while you were outside. you walked through the gym to sit back down, moving carefully to avoid touching anyone. once you made it to the table, dina wondered where you had ran off too. "oh just went out to get some fresh air," you said back to her smiling, not wanting her to worry. she told you jesse went to get more drinks and after the encounter outside, you needed it.

jesse came back a few moments later, holding a round of shots for you three. "here you ladies go," he spoke with a happy look on his face. you smiled slightly back and took the glass as dina laughed at him. you took the shot, trying to forget what happened outside with the man but not what happened with her. you wondered if you would see her again. is she here to watch? could she work at the bar? is she here with friends too? your thoughts were interrupted by an announcement over the speaks that the final match was gonna start soon.

dina and jesse were telling you, "its the last one tonight and the last ones are always the best so lets go!" you would rather sit and order another drink, but what if something else happened cause you were alone? so reluctantly you got up with them and got closer to the middle ring, you heard the loud speakers announcing the boxers as they entered the ring. you weren't even paying attention, nothing could stop your mind racing with thoughts about the girl outside.

you shake yourself out of the trance when dina reaches over to you to touch your hands that were shaking but you didn't even realize, you look to her and give her smile that she returns, then she looks back to the ring and you turn your head to follow her eyes to the center. and your breathe caught.

thats her.

thats the girl who saved you outside.

the girl with her hands wrapped in tape and the mouthguard in.

the girl who wondered if she'd ever see you again either, not that you knew that, but she hoped it wasn't the last time.

you wondered what she thought as you both stared back at each other. you heard the coach start the countdown. you just watched her.

...5

...4

...3

...2

as the buzzer started, she smiled directly at you then turned to throw the first punch.

#ellie williams smut #ellie williams fanfiction #ellie williams x reader #pedro pascal #ellie williams #the last of us #tlou2 #tlog #ellie tlou #ellie the last of us #ellie x reader #ellie x fem reader #joel and ellie #ellie williams fic #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams series #joel tlou #thot4elleific

[hellfirebride]

girl ur L headcanons r so good i love them sm !!!💕 i was wondering could u do some headcanons on L's first kiss with the reader? i have a feeling he hasn't kissed very many ppl sooo 💀

thank u bestie !!! thanks for requesting

L's kiss experience (excluding the time Misa kissed him on the cheek) is probably limited to him getting smooched on the forehead by his mom when he was like. under eight years old. He knows how kissing works from both a scientific and literal perspective, he's seen it billions of times between any kind of media and his case-related surveillance. It's like this aspect of nature he can't avoid seeing, but he's also never longed for it before.

Assuming you're someone he's in a relationship with, he figures it's probably something that's just inevitable. Personally, I think it could go down in one of two ways: 1. he outright asks you if he can kiss you or 2. you kiss him first.

He's not playing around here, okay. It's really just gonna be a "Can I kiss you?" or a "Would you like to kiss me?"

He's been reading your body language for a while by now and he can tell what you're planning on. Not only have you been facing towards him and leaning into your interactions, but your eyes have been flickering between making eye contact and glancing at his lips.

Either way, I think the first way I could describe it is. Awkward. It's either too long or too short, I mean, how is he supposed to know the time duration of a kiss? Would he average it out from comparing footage? I also feel like he would keep his eyes open the entire time. It's his first kiss, of course he's going to observe it and commit it to memory. Imagine kissing L and the first thing you see after you pull away a little is him and his huge ass owl eyes right in your face. smh.

I'd love to say he would improve a lot from that point, but like. Nahhhh. I think kissing would follow the 1 or 2 formula I mentioned earlier for quite a while. Another scenario I can see in the future is just him staring at you until you notice him and just saying "I would like a kiss." He is kinda spoiled.

L would taste so sweet that it's almost bitter.

#dn #death note #ask mothy #l my love #l lawliet #l lawliet x reader #death note headcanon #reply #l death note

[mewmeomei]

streamer!twst : heartslabyul (platonic ver.) edition !!

romantic ver here!

heartslabyul , savanaclaw , octavinelle , scarabia , pomefiore , ignihyde , diasomnia + bonus

a/n : hellor mei here and i hope u enjoy this.. i (probably) had fun writing this soo!! please have fun reading it too (⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠) also i got a bit lazy after caters part sorrg ☹️

desc: what if they stream?? and what if you're their friend??

characters: riddle rosehearts, trey clover, cater diamond, ace trappola, deuce spade

(gn! reader)

. ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : ⋅ ˚̣- : ✧ : – ⭒ ⊹ ⭒ – : ✧ : -˚̣⋅ .

riddle rosehearts !

he's definitely an educational streamer

and he got a set up that looks like a classroom

a big ass whiteboard, a desk and a lot of tools

he teaches math & history from middle school to highschool

people calls his streams "cute tutor bf roleplay" 💀

(^hes unaware btw)

he has all the stuff prepared before streaming, like the whole stream schedule is so organized it's kinda scary 😭

at the end of each stream, he asks the viewers is there any questions, his face gets super close to the camera to see the chat better

like this v

stands there in silence as well 💀

the first time he did this he went viral on the internet for like a week

the people who watches his streams are either 1. actual people who wants to learn/study their maths and history 2. they just think hes cute (90% of them are in this category) or 3. his friends

he occasionally has special guests on, usually trey or chenya

he actually never planned to have special guests on his streams like ever but they crash his streams quite.. often

like

"alright, now at page 78-" "hey riddle (at the window)" "AHHHHHHHHHGGHHHHHHHH"

it makes the stream more entertaining

trey and chenya acts like his students and interrupts his lesson every 10 minutes asking questions

the viewers can see riddle getting redder each question

once he got so red he got compared to bob the tomato from veggie tales

has never fully lashed out on live cuz.. embarrassing

off stream tho

chenya and trey goes temporary deaf right after

he also sometimes show off some harmless spells on live and everyone loves it (this totally happens)

with (name) !

(name) is his stream mod

he doesn't have too many viewers so it's easier to manage

and plus (name) is probably his sanest friend with a lot of free time

so he asked them to be his mod

tgt at day 1 ‼️‼️‼️

they watched his channel grow, from 1 to 100k followers in a year

yeah it was impressive

they felt like a proud parent fr

(name) jst interacts with the chat and helps him fix up a few things most streams

some questionable donations and messages pop up from his viewers from time to time and (name), who was scared of riddle going 🍅🍅🍅🍅💥💥💥💥💥💥, IMMEDIATELY blocks them

like you see it for like a second, blinks, then that message is gone

it felt like it was just an illusion

once (name) fell asleep during a stream and a very, VERY questionable donation came and riddle saw it

"xxx donated 10$!: haha how big are you"

riddle started scolding the viewer and it got heated

riddle gets louder each sentence he says, the viewer responds quicker each time

eventually (name) woke up from a half-yelling riddle and realizes what was going on

they had to block the viewer, call riddle during the livestream and attempt to calm him down

ppl forgot what happened immediately and the chat is full of "omg mod voice reveal!!??1!2!???!!!!"

riddle calmed down after a minute, he then apologized to his viewers

off stream, (name) called him again and apologized for falling asleep and not blocking them immediately, they of course got an earful from riddle but he forgave them anyways

"it's alright, just dont let it happen next time. how about we go to trey's to get some pastries? take it as an apology from me."

trey clover !

i think we can all agree he does cooking/baking streams LMAO

he def bakes/cooks while chatting with the viewers

he has a hand cam + face cam

he explains what he's doing at the moment, because he knows some people bake/cook with him

^he also provides the recipe a day before the stream starts

his followers are probably mostly older women and thirsty teens

sometimes he invites cater, chenya or riddle on his channel as guests

he rarely interacts with the chat if they ever collab since, he fears that the three will burn his kitchen down 💀

ESPECIALLY riddle

they probably had a bag of flour explode on them before

trey asked riddle to open the flour (big ass mistake i say.. 😥)

the bag was weirdly tight, riddle couldn't open it with his weak arms

he got frustrated, then he pulled it with all his might-

POOF!

the bag exploded 💀

trey and riddle are now covered in flour

they just stared at eachother as riddle very awkwardly sets the bag on the kitchen island

the chat kept laughing at them as they stare at the flour

so they decided to just pour the remaining flour in the batter

at the end of the stream, while trey is showing off the pastry they made, all the viewers could focus on is the very..

floury background (wow im such an english genius)

they had a blast cleaning the kitchen after 😍🫶

he also sometimes plays games with cater

its usually when a new horror game comes out and its trending

he usually doesn't jump at the jumpscares but one time he got scared so bad he screamed bloody murder

it got clipped and it just became a meme

cater kept bringing it up whenever they talk to torture trey

(hes super embarrassed lmfaoooo)

with (name)!

(name) is another frequent guest on his streams

they're friends with trey before he started streaming

trey could still interact with chat often if the special guest that day is (name) since they at least wont destroy his kitchen 💀

chat LOVES them

chat thinks they're sweet

sometimes a little QnA happens and (name) just leans on the island as they answer each and every question

cue trey doing all the work in the back LMAO

during a stream where trey's baking a cake for his own birthday, (name) and the other three (cater, chenya and riddle) snuck in his house with a plate of cream in their hands

just as trey was waiting for the cake to bake, they all barged in and threw it on him

BUT because (name) charged towards him first, and the other three decided to throw it, they also got slapped with the cream

it also got on trey's cameras 😭

chat actually got jumpscared when they barged in wwwww

they all end up laughing anyways

"geez, it also got on my camera! haha, why don't you clean my kitchen for me later, (name)?"

cater diamond !

he probably does almost every kinds of streams

makeup, gaming, just chats, karaoke etc.

he usually does just chats

he responds to almost like, everything chat says to him 💀

he probably tried doing an asmr stream before

fails the first few seconds and then just decided its gonna be a mukbang stream instead 😒

his stream titles probably all starts with "cay-cays blablabla"

he often has guests on his channel

like everytime it's a new person

they always look like they're being held hostage

sry just felt the need to draw that 🥺🙈

he gets sponsors often

probably has like 1m followers

he streams often and is actually entertaining

on his gaming streams he plays at least 2 games

so it's like 4 hours long if he decides to do a gaming stream that day 💀

he probably plays roblox horror games often 💀

and those shit itch.io/steam indie horror games

after getting jumpscared by those games he SCREAMS with an echo and then bursts out laughing

why do i feel like he will accidentally say something problematic and offensive on stream then immediately end the stream

and runs on magicam and types out a long ass apology the second he ends the stream

he's suddenly sonic the hedgehog 😰

on halloween he probably does a makeup stream before starting a gaming stream

just so he can play horror games in his halloween costume at like 3am

speaking of 3am

i think he may or may not did THOSE types of 3am videos 💀

not stream related but 😭

cay-cay tries the AMONG US potion at 3AM and turns into THE IMPOSTER‼️‼️😱 (REAL)

with (name)!

a friend of his that appears on his stream pretty often

either in person or online

if they are his special guest that day they'll either play roblox/multiplayer games or do some indoor activities

in horror games cater always forces them to walk in front of him

but somehow he always gets jumpscared/killed first 💀

they will go in a laughing session for 3 minutes 💀

in person streams with (name) is even more chaotic

once cater was doing a pranky pranky on (name) 🤪

he finally got permission from them to do their make up

he lied to them saying that he's gonna do vkei make up on them

oh yeah and chat doesn't know he's pranking them AND (name)

everything seemed to be going fine until he pulled out the green makeup palette

"..uh cater i dont think the vkei make up you're doing for me needs green?" "oh yeah that picture is just for reference~ im adding some stuff ! 🥰🥰"

then he painted their entire face green

the chat saw what (name) looks like and is going WILD

cater gave them the mirror trying so hard to not laugh that he's basically vibrating

"cater i dont look like mana sama" "y-you do look like mana sama.." "i look like shrek cater"

he started to cry laughing as he tries to take a photo

(name) just looks at him in disbelief while getting closer to the camera

they started whispering things that will get his account banned

and he did get banned for a month🥰

and it got harder to try and get (name) to do in person streams w him

"im sorryyy (name)!!! i promise i won't pull a shrek prank on you again~ please come back on my channel? chat misses you!!"

ace trappola !

gaming streamer.

he streams fortnite and valorant.

he also plays often with deuce

he totally has a smp server w deuce

i know almost nothing about valorant and fortnite so i cant say anything about who he mains 😞

he probably curses the fuck out of his teammates and gets banned like every month cuz of his super offensive words 💀

he's that type of streamer who's extremely problematic but you still want to watch him bc he's also super entertaining 😒

his smp streams are the most popular

he argues with deuce often because he kept taking deuces diamonds

"I FINALLY FOUND ONE WHY DID YOU TAKE IT" "geez i just need it for my sword and i only took some" "ITS THE FIFTH TIME THIS MONTH ACE GIVNEITBEBEJFIFRI"

he surprisingly has a lot of followers

ugh

half of the reason why he's popular because of clips of him raging bc he lost to children on roblox "longest answers wins"

everytime he loses he opens voice chat and starts yelling at the children

some kids talk back to him so it's just..

stupid 🧍

its either he got so mad and left the game or he curses the kid out of the game

he once rage quitted so HARD he slammed his keyboard that it broke and even slightly cracked his monitor 💀

i feel like he'd get so mad if he loses to a girl in a game of valorant

no...NO...NO!!!!!!!! i-i lost to a FEMALE 🤢🤢!!! DISGUSTING!!!! -ace trappola

probably got edited into a sad edit audio before

he reacted to almost every video under the audio, made fun of them, then got sick of his own voice 🧍

everytime he plays a horror game he goes "oh i wont scream only pussies screams im a man"

first minor jumpscare he hit a high note

he kept trying to convince chat he did not get scared and became ariana grande for a split second

he just gives up trying to convince everyone he didnt scream after the tenth jumpscare

with (name)!

they met through deuce

became pretty good friends after playing a few games together

ended up joining his and deuces smp server

and started to show up on his stream sometimes

everytime the three of them plays together they had to babysit adeuce

because of that chat just started calling ace "baby ace"

he doesn't appreciate that

so he stopped arguing with deuce too often and (name) is finally relieved

once he decided to do a crafting stream cuz (name)s visiting in person

they were making 5 minutes crafts products.

everything was tested on ace

chat has took multiple screenshots of him wearing those stupid stuff

(name) has changed their every social media profile into a screenshot of ace wearing a stupid 5 minutes crafts product

he's starting to find it kinda funny now

"hey, (name). change your profile picture... it's getting so ridiculous im starting to find myself funny."

deuce spade !

he does bike streams!

he puts a monitor on his helmet everytime he goes out on a ride on his blastcycle and streams them

occasionally has someone behind him and it's either ace or epel

with epel the stream is very nice since their conversation is really wholesome

and if it's with ace..

well uh

ace would scream, deuce would scream back

and it becomes a bass booted stream of two guys screaming at each other

also when deuce turns back while arguing with ace all the chat can see is

new ace_trappola meme

as stated in ace's part he also does gaming streams

the smp streams with ace and sometimes aiming games

he goes on cater's stream sometimes

probably got dressed up as a magical girl once in cater's stream

just that alone got him LOTS of followers

his chat are so nice too

they love him, he loves them

he really appreciates his chat

actually gets a lot of fan mails 🤧

he has like 26 streams of him unboxing fan mails

probably got emotional once while unboxing and cried

got the whole chat panicking 😭

overall a wholesome biker guy that streams 🥰

with (name)!

appears in most of his chat/game streams

in the smp streams they usually exchange super valuable stuff in private

their houses in minecraft are connected while ace's is isolated

chat finds their friendship absolutely adorable

in one of their streams, where (name) went to his house, they decided to watch those brain riddle videos (specifically the ones from bright side)

it's just a dumb & dumber combo trying to solve the riddles

when they actually got one right (which is the last one) they got so happy and (name) just straight up tackled deuce to the ground

deuce hit his head very hard on the ground and his earphones snapped 💀

he uh

fainted for a bit 💀

(name) thought they committed a murder and BEGGED the chat to not report this to the police..

he woke up after like 10 seconds 💥

they just sat there for a minute staring at the camera with the broken earphones on the table 💀

then they ended the stream, after a day that clip of (name) tackling deuce and deuce fainting went viral 💀

well they basically flew so

"ahh.. every viral clip of me is so embarrassing!.. well, at least it was fun, hehe."

#twisted wonderland #twst #disney twst #deuce spade #twst deuce #disney twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #ace trappola #twisted wonderland ace #twst ace #trey clover #twst trey #twisted wonderland trey #riddle rosehearts #twst riddle #twisted wonderland riddle #cater diamond #twst cater #twisted wonderland cater #twst x you #twst x y/n #meiwoo writes ! ♡

[autogyne-redacted]

tbh, your recent post about transandrophobia synthesizes my thoughts about it very well, and im surprised you're getting backlash. the only additions i would make is that the gender/sex binary in the west was originally very explicitly a white supremacist creation, even down to the categories of male/female, and lionizing any aspect of that tends to get really racist really fast no matter how feminist or well intentioned. i guess you'd call me a trandandrobro bc i hang out in the tag and sometimes use the word for specific things (like when the lab threw out my cervical cancer test cells bc the cup was labelled M) but, i genuinely don't disagree with a single one of your points. i've been getting uncomfortable with the increasingly reactionary nature of the conversation on transandrophobia and i appreciate your take a lot.

Rambling about transandrophobia

Tbh It's been really surprising to see transandrophobia types interacting with that post all around.

And mostly it boils down to me having had windows into transandrophobia discourse that makes it seem bad*. And other ppl treating these aspects as exceptions to a discourse they see as basically good.

And I recognize that in part this is just how polarized internet discourses work. Like, if my windows into transandrophobia are largely when something egregious gets said and passed around in my circles, that's gonna give a way different impression then if ppl are part of the discourse and curating a slice they agree with.

And the consistent overall harassment of any attempt to talk about transmisogyny and constant bad faith engagements (eg attacks on agab and cagab language, cafab attempts to ID as trans women and as direct targets of transmisogyny) mean few of us are still in a position to assume good faith with internet strangers we run into who identify with a discourse that very much seems to have a massive transmisogyny problem.

.

My slightly more extended position on transandrophobia, since I've been thinking about it the past few days is:

1) I'm broadly supportive of ppl talking about their experiences and trying to find common ground even around shared ~privilege~, so long as it's done with a commitment to broader, collective liberation. (Eg cis men getting together from a feminist perspective to talk about patriarchy = good, cis men doing so with no specific opposition to normative masculinity = fashy).

2) the general attitude I've seen from transandrophobia world is to say: this has nothing to do with anyone other than trans mascs ppl other than trans mascs aren't welcome as part of this discourse: it's by us for us. Intentionally creating an insulated discourse especially around a point of (partial) privilege has a terrible track record. But regardless of relative positionality insulated discourses are just going to be more limited. They can create theory that's empowering for the creator group but it's probably not gonna get much mileage beyond and it's easy for it to be actively harmful.

3) I've thought for ages that trans masc experience seems ~under theorized~ and that transphobia is rly under theorized too. And it'd be really cool to see this addressed in a way that isn't rife with transmisogyny. It does seem like transandrophobia discourse is addressing a real hole, it's just doing in a way that rly sketches me out.

4) really I think gender discourse overall is just not in a great place rn. It was 1990 when Judith Butler questioned whether it makes sense for women to be the sole/primary subject of feminism, and we had major interventions that I'd say reached a peak in the early to mid 2010's (criticisms of white feminism, of cis feminism, intersectionality becoming a dominant framework).

There's a strong tendency to say that we're basically in a post gender world, or that race is just a more fundamental framework (which I strongly disagree with)** and I do think we really need a rebuilt gender theory that has teeth to it. Trying to build theory around transmisogyny I've found it necessary to do a lot of general theory building around gender. How normative masculinity and femininity work, how gender is policed. I don't think we're gonna be able to make a clean break from identity politics until we can have a strong theory framework that lets us talk about this shit from outside identity politics.

5) this is v rambly but I'm inclined to engage with transandrophobia discourse a little more than lots of my circles in part because I really want there to be more good theory building going on around gender, from different positions and across positions. One day, maybe.

*full of transmisogyny/denials of transmisogyny, trans masc exceptionalism and a failure to recognize and be in solidarity around shared issues with trans fems and cis men.

**getting back to the part of your ask about the history of gender and white supremacy, there's a huge entanglement between gender and race, gender and civilization. Normative gender differentiation has been a classic way the civilized set themselves apart from those they deem savage.

Broad claims like the one you make in your ask anon get messy tho. Like, a largely binary model of gender is older than history but you can also talk about the modern binary having really only come about over the past couple centuries (and obviously it's heavily contested and changing rn). Similarly you could say the modern concept of whiteness came about through the trans Atlantic slave trade (and then has been constantly shifting and getting redefined ever since) but there's obviously much older histories it's building off of.

I'm realizing now that maybe you meant the binary divide between sex vs gender as opposed to the male vs female binary but I can't tell which. Either way, my position here is mostly that it's really really messy to make big historical claims. It's such a high level view you can tell a lot of different stories with the available historical evidence. Ideas about gender and race have a heavily entangled history tho and it's certainly gonna go poorly if you treat either as natural.

#transandrophobia #discourse #gender #transmisogyny

[johannestevans]

do you know of any accounts around that center more uhhhh diverse understandings of gender? or just being trans? it some times feels like when i cast a wider net or just look out of accounts I'm familiar with, i suddenly don't exist? and not to be dramatic but that over some time it's beginning to isolate me from my trans identity.

LIKE I'll leave accounts i feel comfortable and seen in and just a little taste of what ill see is;

hurtful generalization that can only be true if your white/perisex/abled/nt.

Critic of a demographic of trans people YOU fit into that would only apply if you were white/perisex/abled/nt.

Angry post that make it clear that op only manages to talk to white/perisex/nt people.

trans meme; hope your white/perisex/abled/nt.

"Everyone had THAT phase :)"(White supremacist/Terf)

"Oh well Black trans wome-!!!!") ["Boy i sure hope this isn't tokenization!!!!"] [*clicks Through to profile*] [*op proceeds never mentions a black trans person again*][*cat looking at camera from green text meme**tokenizing*]

and i bring up intersex and disabled ppl but I only have to deal with being a Black trans person, and not to give the game away(of what this ask really is) i guess but like thats SOOOO worrying, it implies either that 1) there are not enough POC/intersex/disabled/neurodivergent trans ppl to meaningfully incorporate into the theory/jokes/positivity or 2) The greater online trans community does not think their perspective is meaningful in the first place.

(and then to actually give the game away) This IS lowkey a Whine post, but also i enjoy your blog 1) anything you wanna add? and 2) the posts on trans ppl you interact with make me feel seen not only in marginalizations that affect me but also those that affect people i have made community with.

p.s. this is long srry, i woke up downed the last of some radioactively blue drink than sat down to write this ask

I feel you! It sucks so fucking hard I think when like... you're intellectually aware that a lot of these perspectives - perspectives that just are the norm and the reality for so many people - just aren't taken into account by a lot of "mainstream" accounts, and that that's largely to do with whiteness as a culture (as in: a desire to sublimate and dominate any outsider culture or minority, either rendering it a commodity or rendering it invisible) and white supremacy, and all of the other bigotries that fold into that white-centric and anglo-centric view.

I don't know that I have a huge number of recs in terms of individual accounts - obviously I love @thewarmvoid, Salem always brings so much nuance and consideration to everything Salem does, whilst at the same time fucking battling off constant lynch mobs and bullshit; I don't know if fae're on Tumblr, but Anonsee Maytrix has a lot of class analyses and posts on Twitter and BlueSky; @spacelazarwolf posts a lot of different Jewish trans perspectives, and obviously I'm speaking from my own perspective of Jewish transmasculinity, but I find that a lot of different Jewish understandings of transness and gender stand out to me as critiquing a lot of the status quo around gender and sex; Idris at @bijoumikhawal is a long-time mutual of mine and they always not just have the best fucking analysis and takes of faer own but also curate such interesting and in-depth analysis from different perspectives and bloggers, from a huge variety of cultures and perspectives, especially from Egypt and other North African countries and regions; @xoxoviva posts a lot of great stuff, especially like, good meta on different shows and comics; @mamapluto posts and brings in a lot of Native American and different indigenous perspectives that I always love and appreciate seeing on my dash.

I unfortunately have a terrible memory for usernames and names, so whenever people ask me for recs like this I have a few people off the top of my head, and then I'm basically just left linking the people who are most recently in my notifs where I go, "oh, yeah, this person rocks", but I think that's because over time I've followed such a huge variety of people and I really enjoy connecting with different people and seeing such wildly different perspectives on one thing or other, whether that's in the analysis they post themselves, or just the people and communities they follow and are connected with, and what they then share on their own blogs.

I hope there are a few recs in here that suit what you're looking for and bring a bit more joy onto your timeline and a sense of being seen and reflected, Anon!

#musings #anonymous

[iraprince]

hi idk if this is a weird question but like. how do u Make Art with adhd? you mentioned in your comic that you struggled w various other creative hobbies, but like drawing feels to me always like the Big Bad Thing I Cannot Ever do. even tho i want to make it my career LOL

how'd you get past that?

not a weird question at all! this is actually a question i ask myself pretty much every day, bc generally my answer to "how do i make art with adhd" has always been: With Great Difficulty, lmfao.

it's hard! i am not always good at it! i made art my job bc i realistically couldn't imagine being truly happy with anything else; if that wasn't the case, i'm not sure i would be doing this. like, that ends up being a big divide between the hobbies mentioned in that comic vs art, which is something that it seems (according to viewing my online activity) i do "Consistently;" it is my career, so there's a level of like, urgency and necessity there that my hobbies don't have. which, like, obviously my advice is not "make it your job so that you HAVE to OR ELSE :)" because it doesn't work like that. i am spending an amount of time OR-ELSE-ing that i think might surprise ppl, and i am frankly very lucky that my wife is the primary provider for our family, because it gives me a safety net for when my brain makes a loud grinding noise and then belches a big cloud of smoke and i have to spend a week hitting it with a wrench.

ANYWAY. this is going to get long bc i have a lot of thoughts abt it. there's really no one answer to getting past it, and i am not "past it," i don't know if i think anyone ever can be! we can just try really hard to keep going in ways that won't burn us out. if i had to pull out the absolute #1 most important thing i've learned over the past few years, it is -- and i know this sounds like dumb corny bullshit but you really have to stay with me here -- being kind and patient with yourself.

i'm being so dead serious. if beating yourself up and freaking out and constantly agonizing over how much more you Could be drawing worked, you would be drawing right now. if beating ourselves up over our output worked, EVERYONE would be drawing ALL the time. it doesn't fucking work! it does not! do literally anything other than yelling at yourself. it's bullshit. it's fuckery. it does not work.

on the other hand, cultivating as much kindness and patience and compassion as i can muster -- saying, "well, it looks like i just don't have it today. that's okay, let's try again tomorrow," even if i'm saying it through clenched teeth and i don't really believe it -- THAT works, because it chips away at the idea of drawing being life or death. it's probably a very similar feeling to you describing art as The Big Bad Thing. of course if you hang all your self worth on it and let it become immense and dominating, it's going to be hard to interact with it! it's scary! it becomes easier to avoid it than to try to tackle it and then feel disappointed in yourself in a more active way (vs. just disappointed in yet another day where u didn't try). but every time i sigh and say "okay" when my brain is screaming and crying bc art just is not working, and i decide to rest and try again tomorrow, 1. it is easier to do a little bit of work the next day when i'm rested than it is to do ANY work when i chain myself to my desk for 9 hours and demand results, and 2. i learn that it is not the end of the world. it just isn't. and so art gets smaller, and less frightening, and it can just be my job (something i have to wrangle my adhd around just like anything else, like grocery shopping and keeping the house clean and keeping up with my friends) instead of some huge destructive boss battle with my identity hanging in the balance.

sometimes you have to talk to yourself like a little kid. if a little kid came to you upset and was like "i wanna draw but i just can't. i don't know why." you would (hopefully) not be like, "whatever, i guess you're just not cut out for it then!" or whatever other mean shit we say to ourselves when we can't draw. you would be like, "well, okay. do you want me to sit with you? how do we start? where's some stuff we can draw with? hm, i can't really think of what to draw either. did you see anything pretty or cool today? let's just draw some shapes." etc etc. and if the kid got frustrated and it still wasn't working you'd be like, you know what, that was a good try. let's have some lunch and try again later. and you deserve that same level of patience, and that level of CURIOUS problem-solving ("what can we try? what might be easier?") instead of, like, adversarial/blame-assigning problem solving ("what the fuck is the matter with you? why can't you just do it?")

also, shaking things up!! one of the most frustrating things abt adhd for me is i'll find a new strategy that Works, but it only works for like, two weeks or whatever, and then it stops working and i have to do something else. i have had a way better time just accepting that that's how things work vs thinking of these cycles as "failures."

if i start dreading working at my desk, i throw a block of printer paper onto a clip board and work on the couch for a few weeks. when that stops working, i get back on drawpile and do all my warmup sketches on an interactive canvas, with strangers around me (virtual coffeeshop lol?). when i get tired of that, then maybe i'm ready to be alone with clip studio again. nope, still not working? okay, let's stream while i'm working for a while then. let's start drawing differently. let's change the background color i draw on. just, like, i keep shaking things up to see if maybe i can trick my brain into feeling like we're doing something totally new for a while, and a lot of the times it works, and when it does not work i am not an asshole to myself, which is, as i keep reiterating, super vital.

when i make the most art is when i get super excited about something and i let myself go apeshit. (there's a reason my guild wars 2 stuff is corralled on a sideblog lmao.) when commissions start grinding to a halt for me, a lot of times it's bc i've let them become Tasks on a to-do list instead of remembering that each piece is a DRAWING; it can help for me to sit down and go through each piece in my queue and really look at it, and remind myself that these are DRAWINGS and i LOVE drawing, and to point out to myself stuff in the wip that i like, and stuff i'm excited to draw the next time i work on it. it's very easy to flatten stuff into just An Obligation if you stress too much about it, but it's very helpful to slow down and step back and remind yourself WHY you care that much. it's not just bc you have to.

i don't really want this to get much longer than it already is, especially when i don't really have concrete tips so much as rambling opinions and examples of stuff that Kind Of works for me Sometimes. i think the tldr is: relax, be nice, keep it fresh. i hope at least some of this is helpful!

#ira answers

[the-s1lly-corner]

spot that meets a autistic reader, that is talkative to themselves, but has poor social skills because (lack of good parenting + bullys, but is very smart and loves art and engineering, and dreams to be a scientist one day.. it could began as the reader first feared him over an awkward moment? to opening up about themselves and the reader's obsessive fascination over him. two very talented ppl that only wants to be appreciated, respected and loved...💔

idk is it to much?? bruh I'm trying to be creative😭 I'd be happy with whatever happens!. aNd TaKe yO tiME!! On irl things and beloved spotty <3

Spot w/ an autistic reader!

Rubs my autistic little hands

Feeling a lil drowsy but I wanna chuck this out before I fall asleep for (possibly) the next 7 hours :3

Not proof read we die like Peter Parker <\\3 we are sleepy and tumblr wont let me save drafts for asks <\3

Obligatory "I like this character so I'm hcing him to be ND like me" touch

He gets it

Anyways

I think to help make the whole thing less jarring, or whatever, is that you may have known each other vaguely before the collider incident

You weren't a scientist at alchemax, more like.

Well shoot I just forgot the term but like, you work there, but you dont do hands on experiments, not experienced enough yet

Intern?

Maybe, idk

Obviously you don't work there anymore after the collider blowing up, so... you're looking for a new job

You knew about Jonathan, but you weren't friends

You had also heard rumors about what happened to him but you kinda dismissed it as cruel rumors surrounding his death.. I mean no one could've survived that explosion.. right?

So imagine your surprise when you end up almost getting robbed by spot

Can you blame him? He hasnt found another job since the accident and hes probably living off of pity handouts; likely homeless

Now hand over the wallet!!/j

No but on the semi likely chance that you manage to defuse the situation, given Spot sucks as a criminal, you just bluntly ask if the whole

Rumor thing is true

I mean obviously it is but confirmation is important

After a few more chance encounters, you guys both finally decide to properly sit down and talk

Its tense and awkward at first since 1. How does one even act around someone like spot? He's vulnerable but also trying to do the whole. Revenge thing... And 2. Hes desperate for human interaction and it SHOWS, it's almost uncomfortable actually

But you both trudge past it and make it work

One meet up turns into two then three; then you discover how much hes struggling and

Now you're roomates

Oh my god they were roommates/ref

Anyways, that's the set up!! It kinda felt wrong to just. Jump into it without some explanation on how yall end up in the same area consistently

Doesnt mind that you mumble to yourself, he probably does the same thing. From muttering things to keep his train of thought to having a personal monologue, I wholeheartedly believe he does the same thing

Hs understands how it feels to be. Not treated very good, he likely wasnt the most respected in alchemax so it's not uncommon for the two of you to have vent sessions where you both let it all out

You ask him about his journey to becoming a scientist and not so subtly ask for advice on how to get into the field; and touching onto the whole human interaction thing, hes more than willing to talk your ear off about his entire career history

On the chance you dont want to do physics stuff, and you wanna do another branch of science he's all ears on listening to you ramble, may even lend a hand in getting you to where you need to be career wise

Yall do at home experiments as bonding stuff

Look if spot can make a mini collider in some building then I can only imagine the type of shit yall get up to at home

Oh? You're still curious about.. him? Of all things, him?

He never thought anyone would look at him with interest; usually its disgust or fear, or both

Hes hesitant at first because what if you discover something that'll totally change your view of him?

Takes (some, a little) coaxing

Bro caves fast, he misses physical touch

"So like, these holes-" you proceed to just. Dip your entire fist into a hole and watch said fist pop out from another hole

The demons are telling me to make reader like

Make it a game to try to throw stuff through his holes but I feel like that would be really mean, no one likes stuff getting thrown at them

Please dont throw stuff through his holes :(

Random but like

Idk if this happens with yall but

If someone stims do yall. Like stim back

Like I have vocal stims and mess with my hands; and sometimes my friend will be prompted to stim if I stim??

Idk but yall do that

OHOH before I post this if you're both comfy with physical touch please please please hold him, it's been so so long since someone has hugged him and he really really needs it :(

#atsv spot #atsv #spiderverse #the spot x reader #the spot #spot x reader #jonathan ohnn #jonathan ohnn x reader

[pls-hold-me-im-justa-weeb]

Training With Zoro P.5 (Eventual Smut) Y/N x Zoro

🍶 wc: 3.2K

NO SMUT YET I'M SORRY BUT I SWEAR IT'LL HAPPEN

P.1 P.2 P.3 P.4

I cut out the part about reader cooking a comfort meal and everyone liking it, which you can read on my AO3 if you're interested :) But briefly, reader needed comfort after thinking it's hopeless with Zoro, so they cooked a comfort meal. Eventually everyone (except Zoro) tried it and liked it, so you told Sanji he should cook it some time. He said no, because it's your recipe and he doesn't want to take that away from you. Just mugiwara family fluff :3 I also want it known I am white af, so in no way shape or form am I BIPOC. Please let me know if I should correct anything. This is simply a reflection of intolerance that is present against different nations in One Piece, no matter the race.

Warnings: reader feeling kinda like they don't belong, perversion (by other ppl) of a cultural dance, reader insecure about body, platonic(ish) bathing with Zoro, mild heatstroke, super sore muscles, taking pain medicine, so exhausted reader is acting drunk.

-----

I’m used to mental pain, so it shouldn’t add that much, right?

The rest of the afternoon and early evening was spent lounging around on the deck, hanging out with Brook. He had both his guitar and violin out, alternating between them as he experimented with melodies. You let the music wash over you, tapping your finger to the beat of the faster songs, and swaying to the slower ones. You closed your eyes, picturing how you would dance to them all, sketching brief choreographies in mind’s eye, basing your movements off the traditional dancing you did growing up. It was only when the skeleton stopped to drink tea that you remembered something he had said yesterday when the storm first hit.

“Brook?”

“Hm?” he hummed as he handed you a teacup balanced on a saucer. You smiled and took it gratefully.

“Yesterday… with the storm… you said something.”

“I did?”

“You said… that you didn’t know where you were supposed to be or what you were supposed to be doing.”

“Ah. That’s right. What about it?”

“I… what… have you… did you struggle to find how you contributed to this crew? Like you’re a strong fighter and a great singer, so obviously there was a place for you. But…” you trailed off quietly, unsure of how to phrase what you wanted to say.

“Hmmm. I did. I didn’t think I contributed enough to this crew. I kept trying to prove myself, prove that they had a reason to keep me. I got underfoot for days, trying to help but I actually made things worse” he said, chuckling at the memories. You shifted, waiting for him to continue as he sipped his tea.

“I eventually ended up confronting Luffy, and he put my mind at ease. Everyone has a role on this ship because we’re all different human beings. We all contribute something to this journey we call life, building on people’s experiences when they interact with us. You have nothing to worry about. You are valuable to this crew simply because you’re here.”

You looked down at your lap where your teacup was held, fighting back the urge to cry.

“But I…” you started quietly. Brook interrupted you.

“You care for all of us, and that is enough. You keep our ship tidy, which is a feat in itself, but you do so much more. You talk with us, sharing your experiences, opinions, and empathy. You’re even sitting with me, enjoying my music. What is music if it’s not heard? You talk with everyone about what they’re interested in, letting them ramble and you ask questions, showing that you’re genuinely interested.”

He placed a skeletal hand on your shoulder. It felt odd- pokey and too light- but comforting none the less. You looked at his eye sockets, a shy, wobbly smile breaking through. You were sure he would be smiling gently at you if he had the lips to do so.

“You have enough heart for both of us. Because I have no heart! YOHOHOHOHO!”

You rolled your eyes at the dumb skeleton joke, chuckling despite yourself.

“Can I tell you something?” you asked. Zoro told you the crew wouldn’t mind… and if you wanted to dance again, you needed his help. He cocked his head expectantly, looking at you.

“Back home… I used to be a dancer. I used to perform the traditional cultural dances, and I was damn good at it. Unfortunately, I got an injury and couldn't dance to the performing level anymore… but I’m still not half bad”

“Oh really? Please… tell me about the music that played. I’ll humbly do my very best to replicate it so you may dance again, should you wish to do so” he said, picking up his violin. You grinned excitedly before it faded a little.

“Ah. But. The one I miss the most… it get’s a bad rep” you started, nervous. You’ve seen how the skeleton can get lost in his perverted thoughts.

“A dance that gets a bad reputation? How?”

“I… It’s about… spring. Welcoming the new life back into the world. About welcoming the fertility of the season, and it eventually changed to something that was seen as provocative. Of course, perverted pirates came and spread the news about how dancers were moving incredibly seductively. But… I think it’s beautiful. It’s graceful but difficult, fluid movements with hips and arms and your back” you explained. Your remembered of the satisfaction of how your movements flowed gracefully like the streams that trickled back to life after the snow, hands drawing shapes and patterns in the air as your legs lowered you up and down smoothly, your feet carrying you in twirls as you balanced on the balls of your feet. You didn’t notice the faint smile on your lips.

“I think it sounds beautiful. If you ask me to see it as a work of art that inspires the beauty of spring, I shall abide by that request to the best of my ability” Brook said. You looked at him, pulled out of your memories.

“That means a lot. Thank you” you said quietly, smiling at him. He took a sip  of his tea.

“So… tell me about the music” he said, gesturing to his instruments. You grinned, and opened your mouth in preparation to speak before the musician interrupted you.

“Ah. Excuse me” he said politely. You looked at him curiously. Your silent question was answered promptly as he farted loudly, then belched. You couldn’t help it. You burst out laughing, yelling at him in between breaths that he was disgusting and that he stinks. He joined in your laughter easily.

“Don’t encourage him!” Nami nagged, lounging near the helm. That only made you laugh harder.

That night, dinner was boisterous, but your muscles were quickly becoming more and more sore by the minute. Each knock against your thigh or arm by the rowdy bunch almost made you flinch. You felt a steady gaze on you through the meal, and you looked up multiple times to make eye contact with Zoro. You couldn’t decipher the look, and it didn’t help that his cheeks were nearly constantly puffed out with his large bites of food or deep swigs of his drink. How can he be so sexy and hot but also adorable?

Eventually, you excused yourself, having fully planned on going to your room to sleep away the pain. Apparently, someone had other plans. Not five minutes after you limped to your room and flopped face down on your bed, a loud knock rapped on the door. You groaned, and managed to roll to your back before calling out to come in. You had an idea of who it was, even through the haze of being half asleep.

“It’s me. You gonna use the bath salts tonight?” Zoro asked, leaning in the open doorway. You spared him a glance and sighed.

“Mmm. Maybe. I’m pretty tired though. Might just use them tomorrow” you muttered. He was quiet for a moment, shifting in place. You heard the clink of his swords.

“You should at least wash the muscle cream off.”

You groaned.

“I thought you said it would soak into the skin or something.”

“I never said that.”

You craned your neck, looking at him. You probably looked ridiculous in this position, but you didn’t care at the moment.

“If it won’t stain my clothing because it’s soaked in enough, why does it need to be washed off?”

“Hah? Do I look like Chopper to you? He only told me that it needs to be washed off at the end of the day, something about muscles cooling when you go to sleep”

You groaned again, relaxing your head back onto the mattress. Smart, Chopper. Getting him to take a bath every time he uses it. You chuckled tiredly as another thought popped up.

“You sure you’re just not trying to get me in the bath with you? Jealous that I took a one with Robin?”

You almost felt his posture stiffen.

“Why would I care you took a bath with Robin? Besides, it’s time I took a bath, and I pushed my body in training today. May as well draw one bath with the bath salts for the two of us at once.”

You grunted. He did have a point. It was rare enough that the man took a bath, and besides, he didn’t see you like that. You weren’t much to look at.

“Fine. But I’m not walking without more pain medicine” you conceded with a yawn. You glanced at him. He looked surprised at how easy you agreed. You scoffed, reaching for the pouches you had deposited on your bedside table earlier in the day. You tossed the one containing the salts to him before digging around to retrieve another dose of medicine from the other.

“Relax, hot shot. I won’t look if you’re shy” you teased. Your fingers uncorked the small bottle and you downed the medicine.

“I’m not shy! I wouldn’t ask you if I was shy, idiot!”

You snorted at his adamant reply.

“Shut up and follow me” he griped. You sighed, moaning as you hauled yourself out of bed. Your muscles twinged briefly before settling into a dull ache. You followed him to the bath house, passing a smirking Robin in the library. You rolled your eyes at her, dragging your tired body up the ladder. By the time you got to the undressing area, Zoro was only in his pants, his swords resting against the wall. As he undid the button and unzipped, you couldn’t help it. You wolf whistled, smirking. He snapped his head towards you, flushed. You giggled.

“Sorry. Couldn’t resist teasing you. You’re so fun to rile up” you said, turning away to undress. He grumbled under his breath, looking away. You looked away as soon as you caught a glimpse of his bare ass as he pulled the waistband down over his hips. He really was telling the truth earlier. He wasn’t wearing anything under his pants. Blushing slightly, you stripped from your outfit, underwear following closely as soon as you heard the door to the bathroom close. You took a deep breath, readying yourself for the absolutely sinful sight you knew you was about to bless your eyes. You heard the shower head running, the bath water splashing in the background. You wrapped a towel around yourself to preserve at least some modicum of modesty. Wait.

Wait. One showerhead. One. He’s using it. In there. Standing naked. Your thoughts stuttered to a halt as a blush overtook your face. You almost turned around and left right then.

“What the hell are you doing? Get in here! The bath is almost ready!” the swordsman yelled from the bathroom. You took a deep breath, clearing your mind and sending your body on autopilot. You opened the door, closing it quickly to avoid the loss of steam. That would be your saving grace in this sinful heaven you had managed to get yourself in.

“Calm your swords, Zoro. I’m here. Maybe I just wanted to give you a moment of privacy to wash your ass” you muttered. Good, good. Play it cool. Like this is completely normal. You heard him grunt, and you looked up. Your heart dropped into your stomach, and your fingers felt almost tingly. You weren’t breathing, but you didn’t care. You could die right now and be happy, feeling blessed.

He was standing with his side facing you, arms raised, showing off his biceps and forearms as he ran his hands through his water-soaked hair. Water dripped over his body, falling into crevices, and tracing the planes of his muscles. You followed a rivulet with your eye, tracing its path as it dripped from his thick fingers, down the back of his neck, over his shoulder blade, down the crevice of his spine, and curving as it met the dimples of his lower back. Your eyes trailed lower, seeing the outline of his toned ass that bled into thick, well-muscled thighs that were often hidden under his baggy pants. You ripped your eyes back to his face, one eye looking at you from the side. Water dripped from his sharp nose and ran down the side of his mouth. It dripped off his chiseled jaw to fall onto his plush pecs, following the hills of his abs, trailing down to the V that led directly to his cock. You swallowed. You couldn’t see it. It was strategically hidden behind his thick thigh and a veil of steam, but it was right there.

“Stop staring and get in the water.”

His demand snapped you out of your reverie. You focused back on his face.

“Huh?” you eloquently replied. He rolled his eyes at you.

“Get over here, idiot.”

“Right.”

You stepped forward, inhaling the steam.

“You need to take your towel off.”

“…yep.”

He snorted at your obviously flustered state. You hung your towel on the hooks on the back of the door, and turned around, placing your arms so you were still at least somewhat covered. He wasn’t looking at you, turned away and facing the wall.

“I won’t look until you say so. I remember what you said earlier... about being… ya know… about your body” he murmured quietly as you padded forward. You ripped your gaze from his ass, feeling like a perv once he said that.

“…thanks.”

He was silent, sighing into the hot water streaming from the showerhead. The two of you washed quietly, trading places as needed. Out of respect for him, you didn’t gawk at him like you did when you first came in. Though you really wanted to see what he was packing, you kept your gaze solely on his upper body. True to his word, he didn’t look at you. You guided him around the shower with pokes and prods on his biceps, leading to lighthearted bickering. Eventually, the two of you settled into the bath, fragrant from the salt Zoro had sprinkled in the water before you came in. You sighed as you felt your muscles ease and relax with the healing properties.

“Fuuuuck me this feels amazing” you moaned. You heard Zoro make a small noise, and you glanced at him. He was still looking away.

“You can look now” you said quietly. He glanced at you before looking at the water.

“I… I didn’t look at you either, you know” you muttered, looking out the window. The crescent moon was low in the sky, shining brightly through strands of thin clouds. You glanced at the man across from you, who met your gaze with a teasing raised brow.

“Yeah? Even in the beginning?”

You scowled, face flaming.

“Doesn’t count. You looked at me then too.”

He scoffed.

“Just your face”

You splashed him lightly with the water, still scowling.

“Good. Though there’s not much to look at though so… whatever I guess.”

“There’s lots to look at” he muttered, seemingly unwittingly. You cocked your head in confusion.

“Did you just call me fat?”

“What?! No! I-I-I… it’s just… you…”

Your quiet giggles quickly turned into full laughter at his frantic scrabbling. He finally stopped and glared at you, jutting his bottom lip out. Was he…?

“Awww are you pouting?”

“No!”

“You sure?”

“Yes! Now shut up so I can soak in peace!”

You giggled.

“Yes sir” you said mockingly. He tensed briefly at your reply and shifted his legs under the water. You narrowed your eyes, but dismissed it, exhaustion crashing over you again.

You must’ve fallen asleep, because the next thing you knew, there was a gentle hand stroking hair from your head. You were warm, too warm. Your head was leaning against something firm but with some give. You hummed, opening your eyes. You were in the bath still. Zoro was next to you, letting your head rest on his shoulder. Unthinkingly, you snuggled into him, grabbing his arm and cuddling it to your chest. You felt him stiffen.

“You awake now?”

Your head shot up, and a wave of dizziness made you slump back down. You groaned.

“How long?”

“Not very. About twenty minutes”

You hummed, blinking a few times.

“Dizzy” you slurred sleepily.

“Let’s get you out of here then. Can I carry you? I won’t look.”

You grunted an affirmative, but still whined when your comfy headrest rose out of your reach as he shifted. You tried to tilt your head up to look at him, but that made your dizziness even worse.

“I’m going to pick you up now” he warned. You tried to raise one arm, but felt it swaying. A hand grasped it, and wrapped it around the back of a wide neck. You felt one corded arm under your shoulder blades, and the other under your knees, and he lifted you carefully out of the bath. You groaned with the movement, letting your head loll into his chest.

“Let’s get you dressed and some water.” You could feel the vibration of his voice in his chest.

“Zoro?”

“Hm?”

“You’re good.”

“I’m good?”

“Mmhmm. A good person”

“Whatever you say.”

He placed you on the small bench in the changing area, ducking back into the bathroom to grab the towels. The room spun, and you swayed in your seat. A solid hand fell onto your shoulder.

“Maybe we should see Chopper”

“Poor Chopper. Me again? Poor guy” you muttered. The filter between your brain and mouth was completely gone, erased though exhaustion and dizziness.

“Can you dry off?” A towel was shoved into your hands, and you clumsily swiped at your torso and thighs, unable to dip down to dry your calves. You tried to dry your back, but you dropped the towel.

“Good enough. I’ll help you stand so put your underwear on.”

You were raised to standing, and you were only kept on your feet by the swordsman’s grip on your shoulders. You somehow managed to put on your underwear through muscle memory, though it was clumsily done. You moaned, utterly exhausted.

“’m sorry” you mumbled.

“Why are you apologizing?”

“You’re helping me so much. I’m not giving anything in return.”

“You don’t need to give anything in return. We’re crewmates”

“I love you guys.”

Zoro snorted.

“What are you, drunk? Raise your arms.” He instructed. You ended up lightly smacking his chin clumsily with a floppy hand, but still managed the task. He wrangled your slack body into your shirt and slid your pants back on.

“Fuckin hell it’s like dealing with a child.” He muttered.

“I think you’re good with kids. It’s adorable. You should let your childish side out more, other than arguing with Sanji” you swayed as you talked, more from exhaustion than dizziness as your body cooled.

“Thanks for the advice” Zoro replied, voice dripping with sarcasm.

“You’re welcome” you said cheerfully.

“Okay I’m going to carry you to the kitchen now.”

You nodded, moaning with a new wave of dizziness overcoming your senses with the movement.

“Strong man” you muttered as he slung you over his shoulder like a sack. He was obviously ignoring you at this point, which you were okay with. You were just so… tired.

You briefly remember someone coaxing you to drink some cold water, with some voices floating in the background, then strong arms tucking you into bed. The last thing you remember was a light kiss on the forehead, with a man whispering, “sleep well”.

#one piece fanfiction #one piece x reader #zoro x y/n #op zoro #with: zoro #roronoa zoro #zoro x reader #g/n reader #eventual relationship #eventual smut #mutual pining #reader is part of mugiwara kaizoku #reader is a simp #me too fr #op brook #mugiwara no ichimi #mugiwara family fluff #zoro x you #one piece fluff #mugiwara kaizoku #one piece #f!reader #m!reader #gn!reader

[nevercomingoutofthecloset]

this isn’t to dig on ur anti zutara post but rather start a discussion.

in my experience, the reason we zutarians don’t like zukka is because of the animosity we get from the fandom. we analyze the subtle details we are given because practically every zuko and Katara interaction in the show is because all of them save the first have some degree of zutara in it. their chemistry- be it platonic or romantic- is undeniable.

and yet, we are told by zukkas and kataangers that we are wrong for shipping the ship. a lot of zukkas sideline the women in atla- sokka is given a lot of Katara’s qualities that are stated in the show (ie: people claiming that sokka is the team dad when he literally confessed that he saw Katara more as his mother than his actual mother), mailee is just there (majority of the mailee fics on ao3 are just them being a side couple in zukka fics), and not to mention comradekatara’s posts from back when they were lesbians4sokka about Katara being homophobic. even if it was a joke, it was something that people took seriously. a lot of the same zukkas are the ones making fun of katara for talking about her mother’s death when that literally happened three times outside of the southern raiders episode.

dont get me wrong, I know that the zutara fandom was absolutely rabid in the early 2000s and that’s where we get our bad reputation, but the only time that we’ve had issues with other people in the atla fandom was when they interacted with our content and it blew up.

Honestly you make some points I agree and disagree with so I'll go one paragraph at a time

1.

I do agree that some zutirans get hate that isn't deserved. I definitely think that a lot of the fandom doesn't like zutartians, I'm part of that group as well (for the most part). I also do think they have chemistry, but more in a way that's more like family rather than lovers.

I think the over-analyzing is a bit too much, I'm overwhelmed every time I see a zutara post. Obviously, some analyzing is okay, I sometimes analyze ships, but I feel like zutartians do it sm that it feels kind of annoying?? Maybe that's just me, but I feel like you don't have to analyze things just to justify your ship. Just ship what you like

2.

I agree with the fact that zukka shippers tend to sideline women in fics. I've def read fics where katara is sort of villanized, and I definitely don't agree with that. A lot of the time, ppl prefer MLM ships to than WLW ship, (which if you ask me, is because ppl prefer male characters to female ones (*cough* misogyny *cough*)(though i dont think most of the misogyny is purposely done)) m 6

Idk if it's bc we're in different parts of the fandom, but I've never really seen ppl say that shipping zutara is wrong?? I've seen ppl say they don't like it, and why, but they always state that they don't care if people ship zutara and that they're only stating reasons they personally don't like it.

Perhaps it's because I tend to stay away from the more toxic part of the community because if I see smth I don't like I more often than not just scroll past. But I def believe that their are zukkas who are toxic, but I think some of that is just because ppl are toxic, no matter what fandom you're in.

I can't really speak on kataangers because while I do like the ship, I'm not really in that part of the fandom, so I'm not sure if ppl are unnecessarily mean to zutarians.

(Edit: nvm kataangers can be real assholes, I def believe that they're unnecessarily mean to ppl who dont ship kataang 😒😒)

3.

As for the zutara Fandom in the early 2000s I can't really speak on that bc I didnt watch atla until I wanna say 2017 or 2018. So I don't really know what the fandom was like.

So yeah, that's kinda my take?? Idk I spent like a good while trying to figure out what to say 🤧🤧

#atla #zukka #kataang #anti zutara #im not gonna tag zutara cuz i dont wanna put stuff in zutartians tags if the post is about how i dont like zutara

[qfitpac]

Tips for sharing your ao3 fanfic with the world

Part 1: ao3 mechanics

So you wrote a fanfic. Or made some fanart. And you want to post it on Ao3 and you want people to see it and read it, and maybe kudos/comment, and maybe even read your other stuff too. What do you do?

(This is kinda qsmp specific but can be applied to any fandom if you want. This is specifically to explain what Ive found to be the best ways to share your fic with people, so no info on archive warnings, ao3 rules/guidelines, etc)

Let's assume you're starting from 0. No subscriptions, you don't have fandom friends to boost ur numbers, nil. There are 3 main ways that someone will see your fic: in tags, on your user page, and linked on another website.

Tags

Tags are essential but it is possible to both under and over utilize them and both can affect your reach. People tend to avoid fics with 100 tags that take up their entire screen, or fics that have like 2 tags where they don't know what's going to happen in there.

Popular tags get more traffic but people tend to be more picky: when you're looking in a tag with 15 fics, you may as well read them all even if it doesn't sound like exactly your thing. In a tag with 1500, you're a lot less likely to give every new fic a chance. If you only tag with fandom, character, and pairings, people may skip over since they don't know what they're getting into. That's why more specific tags are important.

If you have too many tags, such that they take up an entire phone screen or more, that may be a turnoff to some people. If you don't know where to start, choose your tags like this:

Fandom

Main characters (I go by "do they have more than one speaking role)

Main pairings (if a ship is mentioned in the background like once, I tend to not tag it)

Tone/genre (angst, fluff, smut, crack, etc)

Situation (café au, canon compliant, fix it fic, prison, pwp, etc)

Maybe a funny custom tag (eg "don't ask me how they got in prison ok just go with it")

Now when people are searching through bigger tags they can find yours more easily: in the qsmp tag, an angsty prison fic, with fitpac as the main pairing. That narrows it down a lot more than just using general tags.

Although ao3 does include people's real names in their character tags, it doesn't have to be this way. When entering a character or relationship tag, write it out the way you prefer and hit enter. It will still (eventually (ty tag wranglers)) be included in that main character tag, but it will not be displayed with their full name. I usually do something like FitMC (QSMP). Note that capitalization depends on the very first person to use that exact tag. If typing FitMC changes to fitmc every time you post, that's why. This same principle works for relationship tags as well.

User page:

The second way ppl might find your fics is via your user page.

A quick authors note at the end of your fic like "don't forget to check out my other works!" (and maybe even a link to one) can help you share your Fics with more people.

"But lev!" I hear you cry. "This is my first fic! Why would anyone visit my user page at all?"

Well, although ao3 is not specifically a social media, there is one place where users interact: comment sections.

"Uh, lev, I'm not going to go self promote in other people's fics?" I hear you say. Well first of all, thank GOD, and second of all, you don't have to.

When you're reading, esp in the fandom you write for, leave comments! Compliment people, give second kudos, point out lines you love and moments that move you. Fandom is a community and by participating positively in that community, the more likely people will engage positively with you in return. I've found some great authors just by looking in the comments on my own fics.

Linked on other websites:

The third main way ppl might find your fic is via links on other websites. As much as it is disrespectful to self promote in other people's spaces, don't let those feelings follow you to your own space. Your own account or blog is the PERFECT place to self promote. Post a link to your fic! Post MANY links to your fic! (over time, perhaps) Tag for qsmp fic, fic recs, pairing, and characters. You can also use a personal tag (mine is #levlies fic)

People might just scroll by a link, so make sure to add something to let people know that oh, this might be something they'd like to read. A short excerpt, a tag list, or a summary can all be good options although if it's getting to be long, consider paring down or adding a readmore.

If you're part of fandom discords that have a channel for fanfic or for self promo, don't hesitate to send a link there as well.

If you keep promoting your fics, people who like your fics will be more likely to stick around to see when new updates are posted. You can even make some friends!

*****

Part 2 will be about summaries and authors notes. Part 3 will be about comments. I'll edit this later to link them (or follow me 😶)

#Qsmp fic #Ao3 #Ao3 advice

[beevean]

Honestly that callout is the inevitable end of what we already mentioned abt nfcv criticisms:

-Loud annoying fucks make obvious racism fueled criticism of n!Annette

-Fandom considers this to be the sum of nfcv critics

-You n other fellas make criticism of n!Annette based on how her character was adapted, her story arc, interactions, etc

-"You're so racist n misogynistic!!!" Dogpiling

And you did acknowledge the unfair backlash against her in good faith and if ppl had disagreements it could be like "nah i dont agree bc x and i think you're being insensitive abt y bc z". Hell, if i got told i said something insensitive i'd rectify and apologize but nope. You're a bigot now congratulations :/

And (and im gonna get a bit political here sorry for that) forever gonna hate how nocturne made me have to speak abt all the nuances of the french revolution bc it is true that France was and is an imperialistic country w racism issues, but said history and issues can't be reduced into "white men bad, rich bad, 21th century 'murica politics" (specially considering how this is an Usamerican show, aka imperialistic country w racism issues that casually has France's politics on a leash lol)

It's all so annoying I just want a good adaptation of the funny beat up Dracula games

Pd: one of the things i like abt nocturne is her redesign lol. It doesn't has anything to do w the og but it's very good looking👍

Yeah, I knew I would be brushed off as one of those genuinely racist people whose criticism of Annette begins and ends with "MUH POLITICS, MUH WOKE" without knowing shit about history or even being a fan of the games. It's still annoying :V I always, always pointed out that those people exist and they have poisoned the conversation too much. But no, scream to me about how black women deserve to be in fandoms I guess. Yeah, I know. Good thing I didn't target you, isn't it.

And as other people have pointed out in the nothes, NFCV is genuinely all sorts of -ist and -phobic, there was a huge post that blew up about the blatant antisemitic implications of a "vampire cabal" owning all the slaves, so if you really want to play white savior, the show you're defending has plenty of material already :^)

And yes. I know this is going to sound like those MUH WOKE people, but I swear I don't mean it in the same way: Castlevania is not the franchise that should deal with real life politics. Not the games, nor the show. It's about humans vs. vampires. It has always been about human vs. vampires, or any sort of monster. Yes, N!Isaac had a past of slavery, but 1) it was highly historically inaccurate, since NFCV takes place before the Transatlantic Slave Trade and slaves in that area tended to be European, 2) it was still lowkey racist, as if black people can only be slaves, as if Isaac doesn't have already an in-built backstory of being persecuted for his powers, and 3) it was, at the end of the day, an insignificant factor of NFCV's lore. It justified one antagonist's misanthropy. It wasn't the literal core of the show. Nothing about the original show, let alone the damn games, would lead me to think "mmh, I sure would love to see important, complex historical events played out in this setting!".

(N!Annette is very cute, I concur lol. A much better design than N!Isaac. I appreciate that she's dressed in yellow like the original Annette :>)

#anti netflixvania

[cupcraft]

I think why it's important to support victims too is the reality of being a victim is that not everyone is going to have collected the evidence that ppl always ask for (and even then people always say the evidence is fake/not good enough).

Like I wont get too personal on details bc im not comfortable with that, but I want to use myself as example for my point because I don't want to speak for other people's experiences.

I was a victim of emotional abuse from a friend group for years that i only very recently went no contact with 1 year ago just about (2 ppl in the group specifically the most). And I didn't collect screenshots. I didn't collect video/recording (and even if i planned to thats illegal in my state without their consent). And for a lot of that relationship though I suffered and was in a bad place I never really quite realized it was abuse until I got out and had someone some else give me a wakeup call. And I currently still have no plans to report it or go through legal trouble with it personally (for reasons not important to this post's point.

And why I say this is because when I share my story with people I'm close to all I have is my word. My word of the things they did to me. My word on how the abuse was subtle, how I knew from a tone of voice if I'd get in trouble with them. How they'd belittle me under the guise of jokes and "game lobby culture". Etc.

And so when you think all victims need to come with you with a mountain of evidence you're really saying you won't believe people at their word which is my reality and many other people's realities for any type of abuse and harm. At the end of the day you're going to trust me or not if you're someone I'm comfortable enough telling my story to. At the end of the day you're going to see the post and decide if I'm making shit up or not.

Of course I wish I had scs of things for many reasons, but even then a lot of my experiences were verbally related with no recording (some of which is subtle anyway ill get into that in a second) The angry comments on Instagram I got were quickly changed while I was too panicked to sc them at the time. A lot of my texts were over kik of which never saved the history.

Sometimes people's words are going to have to be enough for people because that's all you're going to have. Because when you say evidence is important you're really saying that I expect every person in a situation to: know they're a victim, and once knowing theyre a victim collect evidence (even if that evidence collection could harm the victim/or isnt possible) and to somehow make sure that evidence is enough for people, plus be able to have evidence for abuse that is publicly subtle.

And on another point this expectation doesn't really cover how abuse can sometimes be so fucking subtle. You know? How can you explain to people how a tone of voice is a part of the abuse? How can you explain something that could be a joke between friends wasnt a joke in that situation and a part of the torment? How canyou explain to someone when they say something normal its the smile that tells you its belittling/anger? Like even if I had a believable recording of the interaction for the smile example, like it may not be noticeable to you because thats the pt in why its so fucking subtle! you're just gonna have to trust ppl when they know something is sinister or not idk how to explain this. How do we collect evidence for the things that are so subtle and innocuous and meant to fly under the radar in public?

So when people tell you to check your victim blaming rhetoric this is part of the reason why.

You may reblog this btw and you free to rb with additions of your own too this is an important and open conversation. And before it's said this is not specifically about any one situation it's something I've wanted to write about for a while based on both fandom experiences, irl experiences, and just witnessing how abuse victims are treated in various situations. So it's not a vague.

#my musings #vent #can rb #tw abuse #scheduled #im scheduling this while i can step back and go to my friend's wedding #feel free to send asks/reply/rb with anything youd like ill see it later!

[regexkind]

i was going to put 'when does cum start decomposing' after that question! anyway how much active cum[< 1d old] do you reckon's in the sea? do fishes cum. there'd be a lot of semen in that case. let's assume only human cum, that would be more ..intentional?

According to the Population Reference Bureau something like 3 billion people live within 200km of the coast. I would guess without evidence that most people who are cumming in the ocean are

- closer in than 200km

- not visiting (they're residents)

So the question is how many people live within say 25km of the coast, which I would personally consider to be a more reasonable travel distance, with some caveats:

- I've ever traveled over 1000 miles for sex but that's the exception for me and not the rule

- if I was a Real Analyst or whatever I'd do some sort of integral where the integration region was "the populated world" and the term of integration was a product of "distance by land to the coast, multiplied by a term reflecting how economic means impact your capability for traveling." I could be a Real Analyst or whatever but by god my head is pulsing like a food processor right now. You're getting an abridged analysis.

According to Bill Moyers (ok, really PBS, but it's way funnier to cite him in a sex thing), some 1.1 billion people live within 25km of the coastline. I think it's actually pretty reasonable to assume most of these people live near "warm" water that won't kill you by swimming in it.

So now the question really becomes, what portion of people are the kinds of deviants who would engage in such behavior, and how often is sex in the ocean on the menu for the day? We can assume then that (# of people who had sex today in the ocean) * (jizz volume) * (percentage that stays in the (p|b|thr)ussy) is a reasonable estimate.

One of the biggest issues is that according to Quora (god I'm sorry for this C-grade source lmao) sex in the ocean is fun in theory and miserable in practice. Seems likely that of those who have sex in the ocean, those who do are not likely to repeat the experience. So we can estimate and say that of the coastal kinkster population, (1/lifespan) is the probability that they had sex today. AGAIN it would be so beneficial to do this weighted in a way that reflects how geography and lifespan interact. But I ain't doing that this morning.

So that leaves deciding what proportion of people are open to having sex in the ocean. Now this is just a ballpark estimate and I'm going to pretend that it's reasonable to say somewhere between 1% and 10% of people are so inclined. I have no data and no idea how to acquire it.

According to the Lancet, the life expectancy globally is like. 70 years. So our jizzers of the day can be estimated as

1.1 B * (range of kinky ppl) * (1/(365*70))

Which is between 430 and 4300 jizzers.

The volume of semen according to Medline is somewhere between 1.5 to 5.0 mL. Let us say that half the jizz ends up in the ocean, so 0.75 to 2.5mL.

Then we have 322mL as a floor and 11L as a ceiling.

A Fermi estimate is supposed to have the range of an order of magnitude and this is closer to 2 orders of magnitude. Sorry Mr. Feynman for letting you down.

This analysis also clearly fails to e.g. account for semen that is flushed down the toilet and directly into the ocean. But I'm gonna call it good and pass out for a hot second.

[hello-nichya-here]

If Iroh doesn't acknowledge Azula as a victim of abuse, that means he can't relate to her, therefore Iroh either wasn't abused by his family or he was abused in a different way from Azula. Or maybe the truth is he just doesn't want to understand her. I really don't get why he's more sympathetic toward his brother who mutilated his beloved nephew's life. Like, what is he thinking, exactly? Perhaps his reasoning isn't supposed to go side by side with logic, but rather with feelings or sth. Here are my only guesses why Iroh doesn't care about Azula

1) She reminds him of his younger self that he wants to forget (which I don't even think has a point in saying how much is unfair to Azula)

2) She's a "hindrance" to Zuko

Sexism??? Idk. Actually no I don't think Iroh is a sexist based on his interactions with other women we saw so I'm not counting it, but you're welcome to correct me.

Iroh is not dumb enough to not comprehend what kind of situation Azula is in, but he's selfish enough to do zero shit about it. And for the ppl yelling "he was protecting Zuko from her" bitch pls. Azula didn't harass Zuko from the day she was born yet even when she and Zuko were children and their relationship wasn't so fucked up (which Iroh totally could have interfered with after he came back from war and even prior to that) he didn't give a shit. This man never cared about his neice, even before they became enemies. (No, the doll was not him showing her love lmao) Tell me then, if Iroh genuinely wants to guide Zuko on the right path and shield him from misfortune, why has Iroh never tried to pit Zuko against his real abuser, Ozai? Or do you want to tell me that Azula has somehow abused Zuko more than him? Why, throughout Zuko's whole journey, has Iroh never told his nephew that the way he was treated by his father, was wrong? Honestly I wouldn’t bash Iroh sm if he set Zuko against both of them yet here we are. Like really, Iroh? You think if Zuko puts her in her place and murders her, he's not going to lose it and be relieved or vice versa? You think making kids nemeses is going to lead to any good? Wisest character", my ass.

Warning, this is gonna be LOOOOONG and I'm gonna answer to your questions along with this ask I got from @profoundkryptoniteblaze after I pointed out another flaw of Iroh's because there are some points you both brought up that can be combined.

***

"If there was ever any moment in which Iroh could be seen as endangering Zuko, it was that one - hell, Iroh realizing he almost got his "son" killed was probably why he was following him during "The Chase" and tried to reason with him in "Lake Laogai."

Y'know it really gets me thinking if Iroh never learned anything from indoctrinating and sending his own son to death and only realizing the wrong of his actions after having lost him. Iroh let his other son chase after false hope and waste his life, exhausting himself physically and mentally for three years and was never shown trying to pry him away from Ozai or the FN's toxic mentality. Later he helped Zuko chase and almost capture the avatar at the north pole, the latter would've been frozen to death as a result had it not been for Aang's sympathy (honestly not just Iroh and Zuko but the whole world is lucky that he's so patient and compassionate) And then Iroh calls Zuko out for his recklessness in "Lake Laogai". Like what, weren't you the one who-- ah nevermind. I've only scratched the surface about how Iroh failed to guide Zuko and yet neither he, nor Zuko, nor the fandom seem to realize it.

***

To really understand the issues with Iroh, we need to look at the context behind his actions BOTH in universe and in the sense of "He is a fictional character and can be whatever the fuck the writers say he is."

Iroh as a result of issues with the writting

When Bryan and Michael were still toying with ideas to figure out what story they wanted to tell, Iroh was NOT the character we saw in the show. He was originally meant to be a twist villain who was intentionally giving Zuko terrible advice, to make sure he would never capture the Avatar and be able to come home.

That idea was scrapped and replaced with Iroh being a grey character. He was likeable, nice, and even kind, but he was on the wrong side of this conflict. He could be wise, but he could also give Zuko bad advice, the difference being that he didn't mean any harm and genuinely wanted the best for his nephew. He is far from perfect, but there is more than enough evidence that he can redeem himself.

Then, the writers thought of ANOTHER Iroh. One that had already gone through his redemption and is as perfect as a human being can be. This was the Iroh they decided they wanted.

The problem is that they only realized that was what they wanted in book 2, once they had decided that Azula would be both Aang and Zuko's antagonist, meaning the audience had already seen the morally grey Iroh, and thus they couldn't just go back and rewrite the story with that new version of Iroh in mind.

So, they had three options:

1 - Throw their new idea in the garbage can and stick with the one they had already spent over a season developing.

2 - Give Iroh a deep, complicated, time consuming character arc to lead him from point A to point B. This woudly likely force them to have more than jus the three seasons they were planning, and was a bit of a high risk, high reward situation, since it'd be hard to make a grey character naturally become basically perfect, but it could pay off if they did it right.

3 - Retcon the past season, acting like Iroh was ALREADY perfect and thus didn't need that major character development, pretending he had always been working behind the scenes with the White Lotus to end the war and never acknowledging that he spent all of book 1 trying to help Zuko capture Aang.

Bryke chose option three, and when we combine that with the fact, to this day, they don't seem to realize that Azula is an abuse victim and child soldier, makes Iroh's flaws and antagonism towards her a bug instead of a feature, since he is now meant to be perfect instead of a deliberately flawed character, whose opinions should NOT be taken as absolute truth.

Iroh in universe

When it comes to the Fire Nation royals, we need to remember that, on top dealing with the cicle of abuse, they're also fighting two wars - one against the nations they're invading, and other amongst themselves, to see who will be Fire Lord - that made their already fucked up family even worse.

Ozai tried to steal his brother's throne, and to assure her son wouldn't die, Ursa had to help him commit treason by killing the Fire Lord and usurping the throne of the rightful heir (Iroh). And Zuko, even though he loved Iroh, didn't recognize the fact that his father had no right to throne until the series finale. He went so far as once referring to himself as rightful heir to the throne due to being OZAI and Ursa's son - and that was while he was banished and being hunted down by Azula, who is either the Fire Lord's heir or the usurper's heir depending on whose side you're on.

But why would anyone side with Ozai? Simple: the Fire Nation has a noticeable pattern of thinking ANYTHING is fair in the fight for power, which makes sense considering they're imperialists that think the whole world belongs to them just because they said so.

THAT is how Iroh was raised to see things. Sozin, his gradnfather and Fire Lord, decided that he could murder his best friend, kill 1/4 of the world's population, and take over territory that belong to the other nations just because that was what he wanted to do. Azulon followed in his footsteps, and had no problem sending his own son into the battlefield - something Iroh also did, and then paid the price.

Lu Ten's death shook him to his very core - but it did NOT make him change sides. Neither did Ozai stealing his throne, nor him disfiguring and banishing Zuko. He was so passive by that point that Ozai just allowed him to stay in the Fire Nation, and even be a part of war meetings.

In said meetings, no woman was ever present, because the only three female warriors we see are Azula, Mai and Ty Lee (a princess/prodigy and two noble girls who are best friends with said princess). The only other women in see in anything close to a position as part "Fire Nation army" was the female guard that Iroh befriend AND the guard at the boiling rock. We also know that Azula would have been the first female Fire Lord ever, which all but states that, even if Ozai had been the heir and Azula had been his eldest child, the throne would have still been Zuko's, because women don't get to be rulers in the Fire Nation. It is very likely that being married to a ruler and having his heirs is the highest position a woman could have in their society. Royal and important, sure, but always in a supporting role.

This, obviously, affected Iroh too. While he doesn't really seem to think anything of women being warriors (which makes sense considering he spent life attacking other nations, and thus probably fought women sometimes - we saw women fighting in the Southern Water tribe and let's not forget the Kyoshi Warriors), we cannnot forget he did things like take advantage of the fact that June was paralized to show that he CAN be a bit of a dirty old man, and that his idea of a perfect gift for AZULA of all people was a doll.

However, that doll also reveals something important: Iroh DID once view Azula as a child, and as someone he had some sort of obligation to - hence him being "fair" and getting her a gift too since he had gotten one for her brother.

But the main problem when it comes to Iroh and Azula's relationship (or lack there of) is also clearly already there: Iroh has no idea who his niece is as a person, and assumes he can figure that out by just using some concept of what she "should" be like, based on her position in their society.

At that point, she is just a little girl. Little girls like things like pretty clothes, playing with dolls, and talking with their friends. Not something he can relate to, but not something that gives him a reason to hate her. She is also a princess, and thus important, worthy of praise and respect, and to be protected by all - just not as much as she would be is she were a prince.

But as we know, Ozai sees things differently - but that doesn't exactly means he sees Azula for who she is either. She is the second child, like himself, meaning she is not meant to inherit anything, only support her older brother. She is also a prodigy and incredibly smart, which could make one wonder if maybe she wouldn't be a better Fire Lord than the actual heir. Ozai was projecting onto her from the moment she was born, hence him naming her after the Fire Lord - after his abusive father that never gave a damn about him.

And that leads to another thing that makes Iroh not as perfect as the fandom sees him: Ozai's dynamic with his own children mirrors how Azulon raised him and his brother. One was the good for nothing child, the scapegoat, the disgrace of the family. The other was the golden child, the one who was absolutely perfect - because they HAD to be. Let's not forget that Azulon's idea of defending the rights of his favorite son involved making him grief both for his son AND his nephew. He also didn't give a shit about the fact that Ursa, Azula and especially Zuko, the one whose death he was ordering, had nothing to do with this shit. Azulon believed EVERYONE had to pay because ONE person fucked up.

This suggest that, even being the favorite, Iroh likely got screwed over by his father many times, and his continued support of him until his death AND the fact that he NEVER said a single negative word about him suggests Iroh is looking at Ozai's treatment of Zuko and Azula, seeing their own dynamic with Azulon in it, and thinking there's nothing wrong with it. I've said it many times, but he is the classic case of "That's not abuse! My parents did that to me and I turned out fine!" when they're not, in fact, fine.

Either way, due to still being too broken after losing his son, he isn't interested in this proxy-rivalry with his brother. But he did develop a genuine bond with Zuko - the first-born. the "heir", the son his brother looks down on. Which means he is sort of having a "passive" role in this weird dynamic, while Ozai is holding all the cards, and likely believes that Iroh is only "choosing Zuko's side" because he is also a "useless" son who just happened to have the luck of being born first.

For many years, Iroh isn't acting, he is reacting. Ozai wants the throne? Fine, let him have it, it's not like Iroh is in any condition to actually deal with that kind of stress anyways.

Ozai is playing favorites? Not great, but hey, isn't that what ALL fathers/Fire Lords do anyway? Either way is not like he has the authority to tell his brother how to raise his kids. It's too late for him to fight for the throne now.

Zuko needs someone to help him on his doomed mission to capture the Avatar? Fine, Iroh will go with him. He likes the kid.

The Avatar IS alive after all and Zuko is actively hunting him down? Well, those were the Fire Lord's orders, guess they must capture him.

Zuko wants to go capture the Avatar alone, in enemy territory, at the risk of freezing to death if he doesn't find some decent shelter? Well, it is his mission, he calls the shots.

Zuko is upset that his father doesn't love him? Why not tell him that Ozai DOES love him, and that's why he banished him? There's no way this could backfi- WHY WON'T ZUKO LISTEN TO HIM? WHY IS HE BELIEVING AZULA'S OBVIOUS LIE THAT OZAI WANTS HIM HOME?

But then we have the chain of events that make Iroh snap out of it: Zhao tries to kill Zuko, then kills the moon, and, finally, Ozai sends Azula to capture them.

Nearly losing someone he loved again, having his nation do something ungodly dangerous and stupid just to win more power, and then being actively hunted down forces Iroh to wake up and be the Dragon Of The West again.

But he did not heal. He did not change his mentality. He never understood just how horrible of a situation he was put in by his father - and that he is essentially giving into Ozai's game, in which they use Zuko and Azula as a way to hurt each other.

And we have the final piece of this puzzle: Azula is now, officially, his and Zuko's enemy. She is Ozai's heir, is trying to capture them, and her goals are to help the Fire Nation win the war - something Iroh can no longer accept.

He changed sides, but in his mind it is still "Us VS Them", and Azula now happens to be on the side of "Them." She is a soldier of the enemy, and can rival Iroh's chosen heir.

She is in the way, and in a war, people like Iroh are expected to either capture or kill "obstacles" like her. So, he does that, and expects Zuko to do the same, for his own good, because this is war, and if they don't win, they'll be at Ozai's mercy - and we know he doesn't have much of it to offer.

She is also someone who is going against what is "right." She is rebelling against her uncle and true Fire Lord, as well as her older brother and future ruler. They are above her in the Fire Nation's laws and social hierarchy in every way (status, age, gender, etc), and yet she is supporting a traitor who stole the Fire Lord's throne. She needs to be reminded of her place, and she can either accept that or deal with the consequences.

It never occurs to Iroh that it doesn't have to be this way, because this is all he has ever known.

#asks #iroh meta #iroh critical #long post #azula deserved better #zuko deserved better #iroh deserved better #bryke critical

[blogofreverence]

realizing that segregation due to neurodivergency is almost certainly the most evil thing ive ever had the experience of being subjected to.

liek. ND kids being sent to schools and classes explicitly for ND kids so as to liek...not hold back the neurotypical kids?!?!?! "We have to send the retards to retard school. We cannot have their retardation infecting our beautiful, intelligent children."

ok if im being kind i could say that it's to protect the ND kids from bullying. but what kind of fucking bullshit is that where if a kid is NT, they dont get to interact with kids that cant hide their NDs? it's clearly holding back NT kids from learning how to exist in a world with ND ppl and holding ND kids back from learning how to exist in a world with NT ppl but the ND kids in ND schools get the added detriment of being occasionally tackled by large men who's job is to prevent tantrums. after being held down they escorted us to a room with a punching bag and the big guy until we've calmed down.

then going back to public school and having a guy who goes everywhere with you except the bathroom because you're ND so you have to be watched very carefully in the event that you might have a tantrum or whatever.

and that's just my experience in schools liek i've been hospitalized involuntarily (read: imprisoned) more times than i can fucking remember. a minimum of once a year from 2017 to 2021, ranging from several months to a couple weeks. this one mental health unit had 1 shower to 2 people and the showers were only unlocked 2 hours out of the day, and one of the nurses complained to another nurse that her unit smells like a barn while walking me and another patient to the hour or 2 of visiting we got a week.

idk man. idrfk.

#mental health

[deadaccount1211]

TDI 2023 Rant 2

Spoilers below

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I want to try break this review down into several sections.

Ripaxel: I've been trying to articulate my thoughts on this and I think I finally got it down. I don't hate the idea of it but the execution was terrible. If this was the writer's plan all along. Why did Ripper start the season off hating Axel and then the very next episode saying he likes her? No buildup. And don't hit me with a "he was mean to her because he likes her". Such a bullshit excuse.

And one of the reasons I liked Ripper was because he was a versatile character. In season 1 he interacted with mostly everyone on his team (Chase, Millie, Damien, Zee.) This season he only seems dedicated to Axel. And I don't like when TD has characters talk to only one other character. Same thing could be said for Priya and Millie, but we'll get to them later.

Also throughout this whole ordeal. We never see Axel's POV? You're telling me it took one poem for Axel to want a piece of Ripper? After a two season long rivalry now they want each other? I just find the writing to be very sloppy and I can't get behind this ship personally. Ppl who hate this ship because of Nichaxel are dumb tho. That was never gonna happen. Lol. I think Axel will leave before Ripper does.

Chemma: I never thought I'd say this. But I actually wanted more from Chemma. Especially considering the alternative we got for the straight couple this season. Seeing Chase individually was fun. I like how they leaned into his youtuber angle. Though I do have to ask, what was the point of having Emma outlast Chase again and then she does nothing? No interactions, no plotlines. Just a big pile of nothing and then she gets kicked out for being dumb. If you ask me, the season becomes ten trillion times better if Chase and Emma swap placements.

The whole Bowie cheating plotline makes me think he'll be going in the late pre-merge- early merge category. Raj is gonna find out, be pissed and vote Bowie off. Maybe?

Objectively speaking Mkulia is just as sloppy as Ripaxel. But at least Mkulia is charismatic so I give them a pass. I still think MK is gonna get her lick back and betray Julia down the road.

Nichelle is cool but she needs to start interacting with ppl.

Are they really gonna let Zee float to the merge again? He's funny but I just hope he doesn't overstay his welcome.

I really liked Damien in episode 3 but with Millie gone, he has nothing to do. I need a Damien-Priya-Caleb love triangle so Damien can beat the filler character allegations.

Overall, I'm still confident in my Ripper vs Nichelle finale prediction. Seems the most likely.

#td spoilers #total drama 2023 #total drama