#inside schizophrenia

[221bluescarf]

I don't usually talk a lot about history and stigma around mental illness but after listening to the latest episode of one of the mental health podcasts I like, I just found it so interesting that I want to mention it.

You're getting my breif version but you can find the episode yourself if you're interested and I recommend listening to the podcast (Inside Schizophrenia) if you're interested in learning about schizophrenia ⁠—the illness, treatment, and history. Be warned though, this 1 episode in particular has a tw for violence and very disturbing crimes.

Most people are familiar with the stereotype of schizophrenic serial killer or otherwise violent and demented portrails of people with schizophrenia and other mental illness. I've met a lot of people who believe in this stereotype about schizophrenia, and bipolar too. I've been asked if my medication keeps me from killing people. Even someone in the psych ward with me said "damn girl, you hurt people??" when they found out I take antipsychotics.

As the podcast pointed out, in the 1920s, there are sources that talk about people with schizophrenia being mostly harmless, to put it simply. But in the 60s, during all the civil rights stuff, the government started labeling people with schizophrenia and associating it with violence which was never the case previously. The government "diagnosed" a lot of people (a lot of black people) with schizophrenia. Along came a trend of both the government and the news outlets labeling people as an extremely dangerous schizophrenic or violent psychotic person. There was no correlation and no actual symptoms of schizophrenia (hallucinations, delusions, etc) It was simply something that sounded good (or rather, sounded bad. Bad and scary).

The idea is usually that in order to do something so violent and, well, "crazy", you'd have to be mentally ill ⁠—when that's really not the case. Criminologists in the past (70s I think) were looking for just that: the crazy people committing murder and assault. But they didn't find it. What they found was that the majority of these crimes were committed either by "regular people" or committed by people with other issues not considered mental illness.

Not every mentally ill person is completely harmless and non-violent, but that goes for the entire population. To use an example from the podcast, most serial killers have been white men, a much bigger percentage than of people with diagnosed mental illness, yet that doesn't make (most) people afraid of white men in general.

Interesting too, is that you have to take into account the fact that the violent murderer could be *lying* to try and get away with their crime. There are offenders including serial killers who gave stories of delusional thought and/or hearing commanding voices who later admitted that they'd actually made it all up. I can't remember the name but if I recall correctly one of them claimed a dog had commanded them to kill but later said that was a lie.

It's just so much easier to believe that the only danger comes from mentally ill people. Because believing *anyone* could be the culprit is much scarier and you can't protect yourself from them as easily as you can protect yourself from the image of a raving, crazy escaped mental patient.

But that belief doesn't actually protect you, and what's worse it comes at the expense of all of the innocent mentally ill people just trying to live.

I wish there was a short and simple way to say this to people.

#mental illness #stigma #schizophrenia #psychosis #inside schizophrenia #schizophrenia awareness #schizoaffective #221bluescarf.txt

[schizopositivity]

#my favorite episodes are when the guest is actually schizophrenic i love to hear it #inside schizophrenia #coping skills #coping techniques #schizophrenia #mental illness #nd #schizophrenic #neurodivergent #psychosis #actuallyschizophrenic #mental health awareness #pseriouslypsychotic

[blinkpen]

If I may be completely lost, what is TgF and who are the characters you draw? Are they all OCs for a universe/story you made or a fandom I am simply clueless about? Sorry if this is random.

oh TgF is an acronym for my main story's and it's world's old name, the current name is MantleDwellers! It's a paracosm of mine I've have since I was very young and evolves and grows with me as I get older, some things remain unchanged and simply continue to grow, some things get revised and then I spend time accounting re-calibrating certain the universe to get everything aligned again, but I am slowly but surely sculpting it into a coherent story to be released in some form or another at some point if I can, but it's also obviously something so deeply personal to me I get joy from it even entirely self contained, I just like sharing it others seem to enjoy it when i do!

i summation, these tags on a previous post addressing this question the last time someone asked it:

so yeah it's original characters all the way down

#ask x #some of these are REALLY old and character designs have shifted slightly since they were drawn but #still i like them as Examples #science needs to invent a way to spelunk into my brain and retrieve whatever is inside #(i have schizophrenia) #blood cw #if you're thinking of comparing my work/characters to Those Two Cartoons: please don't

[we-are-the-memers-mr]

The everything that's "fine":

#dank memes #memes #funny #humor #lol #haha #funny memes #meme #funny shit #crackhead energy #mental health memes #adhd memes #schizophrenia memes #cheems #feeling bad #screaming inside #house cleaning #motivation #cleaning motivation

[everyurlithinkofistoolong]

Everyday I think about how Misty isn't the antler queen and how she was the first girl to be disproven right off the bat to not be her. You would think it would be her at first right? She's unhinged, she's unable to see the fault in some of the things she does, she murders and murders, and essentially everything that happened in the wilderness is indirectly her fault because she destroyed the box. But she was the first girl to be shown unmasked because Misty doesn't attempt to hide, or maybe she just can't. She's unmasked because we see her nature right of the bat, there's no pretense of normalcy or repression of who she is.

The antler queen is hidden, behind the scenes. She isn't the one who dragged pit girl's body out, prepared it, and served it. It was served to her. If the wilderness is the representation of trauma, then the antler queen is the source of it and the instigator. The center.

If Misty is a hammer used to beat someone to death, then the antler queen is a quiet poison that you don't even know is in your system until it kills you. Anyways here is why I believe with my whole heart that Shauna is the antler queen.

#who was the one who fucked jackies bf? the one who stews in anger for so long that it comes out in ways that are harmful #whos the one who left jackie out there to freeze to death? whos the one who took the first bite out of her body? #whos the one who released her anger by beating lottie half to death and setting of that whole series of events #whos the one who instead of going to jeff about her suspicions about adultry instead had her own affair and killed adam #who set off the series of events in the present that brought everyone together again which lottie interpreted as the wilderness doing it? #who maintains this veneer of housewife normalcy despite her hands shaking wanting to kill the man her jacked her car so bad #its all shauna its all been shauna its just we dont see it bc other characters have more obvious and disturbing issues #like misty and her neediness and nat and her father and lottie and her schizophrenia #but shauna the plain girl. the one who takes out her angry upon seeing jackie with jeff on taissa accusing her of injuring their teammate #on purpose #shauna whos normal. shauna whos the straight A student. but shes the one whos dark inside. her actions have such a rippling effect #that its hard to see that it all traces back to her #lottie saying that callie is so powerful. callie being repeatedly compared to her 'psychopath' of a mother (quote) #shauna being the executioner except she covers her eyes bc she is ashamed. she doesnt want them to see how badly she wants to do this #how badly she wants to pull the trigger but natalie says to look her in the eyes when she does it. bc natalie sees thru it she always seen #thru it #yellowjackets #i love shauna shipman actually i love her so much

[blbrry666]

„The bravest thing I ever did was continuing my life when I wanted to die“

#su1c1d4l #tw depressing thoughts #schizophrenia #e4ting dis0rder #drown in my mind #voices in my head #s3lfh4rm #cvtt1ng #tw s3lf harm #mentally ill #mentally fucked #dead inside #xxxtentacion #fuck love #i hate myself #idontwannabeyouanymore #alone with my thoughts #always alone #anxi4ty #bpd thoughts #borderline personality disorder

[varnapovs-14]

If only I could live FOREVER just in my head, like I do now...

( depression diaries)

Varna -

#depression #schizophrenia #poetry #my poems #poets on tumblr #original poets on tumblr #female poets #new poets society #pain inside #lonelier version of you #loneliest #moon #varna

[artsmuklermd]

Free for 5 days! The Man with a Microphone in his Ear, by Art Smukler, MD, author & psychiatrist

Till January 3, 2024, my novella, THE MAN WITH A MICROPHONE IN HIS EAR is free on Amazon. Just click and download the e-version to your Kindle or iPad or reader. Happy Holiday and a healthy, productive 2024. Happy reading.  Art #writers, #mysterynovels, #paranoia, #psychotherapy, #psychiatrists, #novella, #freebook,

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#a mystery #free book #How far can you run from your own mind? #Inside the mind of a psychiatrist #Paranoia #psychiatry #schizophrenia #TALES FROM SMUKLER&039;S COUCH

[spectacle-street]

Pretend

by Art M. Cox

It smells like pretend,

which kind of smells like a cookie,

"cookie?"

the laundry soap my dad used that summer,

or whatever cleaning solution my sister used,

and also there's that fucking

"cookie?"

voice.

"cookie?"

What is pretend?

Pretend is Marigold-ie at the bottom of the sea in her bathroom,

Pretending to be a monster of love and dreams.

It's gross, it's unreal, it's dark, it's death.

There is something enticing about pretend.

Pretend is a God

whispering in my ear all day,

and turning my heart into a pendulum.

"Yes, No, Maybe,"

On it swung,

back and forth, every day.

Leading me to and fro,

by the nose.

So dangerous.

Pretend is a pack of demons in my head,

(I am bedeviled)

(and I am the devil)

There is a Demon of Me

and a Demon of You

and Demon called Her, and Him,

there is Us, We, and Them.

My own little Greek choir,

(I almost miss them)

Pretend is playground rules and malarky. It's a world that turns on fear and anxiety. Pretend is escape, but from what and to where? Surely worse than where I came from. Surely worse.

There are a thousand people in this body trying to be it.

Pretend is Peter and Time and a dark heart, beat-beat-beat beating away in the walls.

This is pretend to me.

---------

Just some backstory for this poem. I have Schizophrenia! This is one of my poems about my experience as a schizophrenic person. Pretend is how I refer to my side of reality when things get a little crazy in my head. I often feel stuck in this world and in my head, especially on the bad days.

#poetry #poems on tumblr #personal poem #schizophrenia #mental illness #art #schizophrenia poetry #just a look inside my brain

[lixzwithapen]

(Dust to dust)

My being

In pieces

I'm seeing

Dust

Of who I once

Was

As it comes

Over me

This can't be

My soul

Not whole

Split

As I sit

And examine

Myself

It's been

And is

Hell

As such this

Pile of dust

It is just

What I've become

I came undone

He really won

My being

Broken

I'm not seeing

An end

I will never again

Be my friend

I will continue

To pretend

But it's not true

That I could mend

#art #poem #poetry #schizophrenia #schizophrenic #schizo #psychosis #psychotic #schizospec #dead #inside #im #broken #he #won #he actually did it #nothing #split #dust to dust #ashes to ashes #im already dead #i swear #im not me anymore #this isnt My life anymore #his #its his life #im his #i #broke

[schizopositivity]

TW: r-slur said in the context of a quote, sanism, breif schizophrenic suicide rate mention

#inside schizophrenia #inside schizophrenia podcast #mental illness #nd #schizophrenia #schizophrenic #neurodivergent #psychosis #actuallyschizophrenic #mental health awareness #pseriouslypsychotic #Spotify

[m00ngbin]

I want to say that I just had an episode but was it really an episode or did I just convince myself it was

#tw? #tw #( #i dont suggest you read this #) #i say as im struggling not to lose my mind over omori #when i say lose my mind i dont mean getting super excited #i mean lose my mind as in im going to be convinced that theres little people inside my mind like sunny has #and im going to potentially try to stab my eye out #if my family left me alone for long enough i probably would have already #i was convinced that my eyesight was terrible in one eye because that was the one that i needed to stab out #and it didnt help that its the same eye as sunny's #im also going to be convinced that im schizophrenic and that everything i do is a pattern and it all leads to schizophrenia #and by i am going to be i mean that i was already today and im trying to keep myself grounded in reality #its like half of my brain believes all this stuff and the other half is trying to convince myself that this is crazy and obviously not true #and not a good idea #i have like an emotion or something that takes over my mind whenever i start getting like this and its weirdly dismissive and airy #its still me sort of but i feel weird and calm and distant. its almost a different person but im still myself yk #i have all of my memories and everything im just very different #i feel that right now but im still typing this like its me talking about someone else

[starvingneopet]

few feelings replicate the panicked searching from one’s first unseasoned attempt at the stardew valley egg hunt as well as scouring the house for a stagnant water cup that contains the ideal volume (0%) of cigarette ash while an antipsychotic is disintegrating in your mouth

#why do they taste so fucking bad #yes i smoke inside yes i have schizophrenia YES the dick is out of this world

[butchdykekondraki]

unbelievably close to closing the inbox until you guys can fucking behave yourselves.

#[jay] #major tw 4 rape and paranoia in the next few tags/srs #> #>> #>>> #>>>> #>>>>> #>>>>>> #>>>>>>> #>>>>>>>> #>>>>>>>>>> #>>>>>>>>>>>>> #>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> #>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> #do not fucking tell us youre inside our walls and going to rape us. that is not a funny fucking joke. #we have mentioned our past here with us being sexually abused and tormented for our schizophrenia. #that is not fucking funny. #telling us to kill ourselves is not fucking funny.

[iamanoccasionaldoodler]

This is a very minor detail but at the end of Harrow the Ninth one of Gideon's main beefs (beeves?) with Ianthe is that she lied to Harrow about Cytherea's body being under her bed. Now I'm not saying gaslighting Harrow into thinking she's crazy isn't Ianthe's vibe, but how would Gideon know?

Her narration includes the body, so we know she can see Harrows hallucinations (which makes sense, she's not following Harrow around, she's literally INSIDE her brain) so like. If Cytherea's body wasn't there,,,, how would she know? She says Ianthe lied to Harrow about a body that was "obviously there" but like. Obviously from inside the brain of someone with schizophrenia.

But my point isn't actually about whether or not it was there! It actually doesn't matter. What matters is Gideon has literally no way of knowing if it was really there or not but she trusts Harrow and Harrow's mind. Harrow is so paranoid about the schizophrenia she doesn't tell Gideon for all of Gideon the Ninth, even though she must have been losing her mind in Canaan House. But Gideon has seen it first hand and she doesn't write her off as crazy. She believes in Harrow's experience that Cytherea was there. She says "no, we saw it, it was there."

And like Harrow doesn't even know that one of the first thing Gideon ever does when she gets control of her body is go to bat for Harrow's credibility as a witness. She trusts Harrow when Harrow doesn't trust herself. And Harrow has no idea! Harrow never told Gideon! Harrow doesn't know Gideon was watching! She hid it from Gideon for SEVENTEEN YEARS. She tells Ortus on day 1 of their cavaliership but she never tells Gideon! But Gideon knows and Gideon doesn't doubt her and Gideon saw what she saw and it was real and it was there and Gideon wants to fight Ianthe for lying!

In conclusion. Griddlehark.

#tlt spoilers #the locked tomb #griddlehark #gideon nav #harrow the ninth #htn

[angellsplt]

pacing. pacing. pacing some more. thinking abt reintroducing us to our scratching habit for fun

#doing a close and then open shift back to back and i'm done but i can't go anywhere cause other ppl aren't #body hurts brain hurts i need to do activities #the schizophrenia is eating me alive i'm twitching inside and statue still outside