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whowantslovergirl · 1 year

Note

hey! can i req a spencer reid dating someone that’s like ,,, taylor swift level of famous? and like maybe the team teases him whenever a romantic song that’s clearly ab him plays?

An: YESYESYES ima use Taylor swift songs and I don’t really listen to her so bare with me guys 😍 all for you my lover 🤍 and please bare with me I’m going to write the teams dynamic as best as possible and I took notes on how to write Spencer the way matthew gray gubler is my husband he just doesn’t know it yet 💋

Style

Dr.Spencer Reid x famous af! reader ( reader is female with she/her pronouns)

warnings: some cursing, fluff af, and i think that’s it hope you enjoy my lovers 💖 criminal minds masterlist

Summary: The team finding out about Spencer’s kinda famous girlfriend

posted: April 6,2023

When Spencer woke up this morning he knew that he was going to have a great day. The team had no cases. He talked to you last night to compliment your new song. And he found out that you’re coming over later tonight.

The day couldn’t be better.

Until he actually went to work.

_____

You got that James Dean daydream look in your eyes

And I got that red lip classic thing that you like

And when we go crashing down, we come back every time

‘Cause we never go out of style, we never go out of style

He heard your song blasting through the BAU. He saw Penelope singing and dancing.

He never been more confused in his life.

“Hey pretty boy!” Derek yelled since he can’t hear himself think.

“Hey Morgan! What’s going on?!”

“Garcia and her fascination with Y/N L/N!” The music paused.

“I just want it to be known that Y/N L/N has blessed your ears with her angelic voice this morning.” She saw Spencer. “Hey Reid!”

“Hey Garcia.” She continued playing the song.

“What’s going on? It’s way to early for this.” Emily said walking in with her coffee.

“Babygirl’s favorite singer released her new single.”

Her eyes lit up.

“Oh! Replay it! I want to hear it!” And she did what she was told.

_____

Long story short everyone heard and loved his girlfriend’s new song.

“Hey guys, is it just me or the lyrics sound like Spencer?” JJ said out of nowhere.

Everyone looked at him and agreed.

“Yeah I can see that.”

“You make a good point JJ.”

“It does make sense.” Derek said while inspecting him.

“What! No it doesn’t!”

It does.

“Oh come on Spencer! You got that long hair slicked back white t shirt. That is so you!”

“Just because I have long hair does not mean she is talking about me Penelope.”

‘Besides half of the song isn’t even true.’ He mumbled hoping they didn’t hear them.

But they did.

“What did you just say pretty boy.”

“Shit. Did I say that out loud?”

Penelope gasped. “You never curse unless your hiding something or you’re frustrated! And I’m pretty sure you are not frustrated right now Spencer.”

He didn’t know what to say.

“How would you know half the song isn’t true? You don’t even listen to modern music.” Emily said with a questioning tone.

“Unless you know the song is about you!” Penelope exclaimed.

“Come on! I would not be able to get with Y/N L/N! We are in different calibers. I am a profiler and she is a pop-star with a huge- no, massive fan base. It just would never work.” Everyone looked at him surprised.

“Are you dating Y/N L/N?” Hotch walked in.

“No!”

“You ramble when you’re nervous a lot.” Emily said.

“And he’s getting sweaty.” Derek said with a questioning tone as well.

“Guys I am not dating N/N!”

Shit.

Penelope gasped once again. “You said her nickname!”

He once again was speechless.

He opened his mouth to speak but no words came out.

You were going to be so mad at him.

_____

“That’s hilarious!” You said laughing over the phone.

“What! No it’s not N/N.” You rolled your eyes. “So how did your team of profilers find out?”

He told her everything. And she laughed even more.

“Y/N stop laughing!” He said while his face was heating up.

_____

It was the next day and Spencer found out that you can’t come until next week. So of course his mood is a little down.

_____

“Why the long face pretty boy.” Derek continues. “Your N/N isn’t coming?” Spencer rolled his eyes. “I wouldn’t know because I’m not dating her.”

“Keep telling yourself that Spence.” JJ said and Emily laughed.

“Eek! Y/N is coming out with a new album!” Penelope exclaimed while walking in. “My whole life is complete. I have no more reason of living after such extraordinary news.” Everyone just laughed at her.

“ We should go out together. I need to express my gratitude for this album.”

Everyone just agreed, even Spencer.

_____

He really missed you but at least he has his friends.

He wasn’t ready for tomorrow.

_____

Everyone came in work at the same time and saw someone at Spencer’s desk.

“Who is that?” Penelope asked.

The person in the chair turned around and Spencer’s face lit up.

“Hey guys.” You say waving not noticing Spencer yet.

“Oh my god! Oh my god! That’s Y/N L/N! She’s here!” Penelope said hitting Morgan excitedly.

“Oh my god it is.” He said surprised.

“Have you guys seen Spencer?”

“Y/N” Spencer said surprised as well.

“Spencer!” You said running up to him and jumping into his arms.

The whole team just looked at you guys with shock in their faces.

You guys are totally oblivious at the looks that are being given.

“I thought you weren’t coming until next week.”

“It was obviously a surprise Spence now shut up and kiss me baby!” You say smiling.

You press his lips onto his and he melts in the kiss. Your hands went up to his hair and his hands rest on your hips. Hotch cleared his throat. You two broke apart.

You turn around and apologized and you saw Penelope shaking with excitement.

“You must be Penelope. I have some gifts for you.” You walked over to Spencer’s desk. “This is my new album on a disk and it even has some songs that didn’t make the cut.” You say winking. She was just staring in awe.

“And it’s also signed. I also have backstage passes to a tour that hasn’t been announced yet.” She squealed and you just laughed.

She looked at your boyfriend. “I’m never letting her go.”

Everyone laughed.

Spencer is not living this one down.

An: AHHHHH I just want to apologize for not giving exactly want the request said this just took a mind of its own fr but I hoped you enjoyed until I post again my lovers 🤍

#spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #bau team #derek morgan #jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #spencer reid #criminal minds x reader #I need to go to sleep #my lovers on top

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whatsmymeme · 10 months

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A Sandy Situation

Pairing: Jake Seresin x Mitchell!Reader

Request: Hey! Can I request an imagine with Jake Seresin x Mitchell!Reader where Pete is teaching the reader to play football at the beach (Because that's my favorite scene hehe) and then Jake comes in and the reader absolutely hates him because of his ego. He challenges her and she humbles him :) Thanks! I adore you and your writing!

Warning(s): Language

Authors Note: The beach scene is my favorite scene too hehe. I hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 875

The beach was somewhere that your father took you numerous times growing up. It was practically a tradition that you would go every weekend during summertime. Well, this time was different. He not only took you to the beach today, but he invited the pilots that he had been teaching.

You adored them all, except the arrogant blonde-haired tease, Jake Seresin. Also known as a Hangman. You were done with him the moment you met him. He was flirtatious, but his attitude immediately changed when he figured out that you were the daughter of Pete Mitchell.

Although you had absolutely no interest in Jake, he actually found that attractive. He was always the guy who wanted what he couldn't have. You were number one on that list.

"You're getting better [Y/N]," Your father complimented, lifting you up from the wet sandy ground. "I think next time you need to focus more on where you're going rather than how fast you're going."

You nodded as you brushed yourself off. You hated wet sand.

"Not the first time I saw you trip [Y/N]," The familiar voice rang through the air. You huffed in irritation. You were not in the mood to talk to Jake. "It looked hilarious from where I was standing."

"Go away Hangman," You growled, shooting daggers into his eyes as he walked up to you. "I'm not in the mood."

"Oh, when are you ever?" Jake scoffed, rolling his honey-brown eyes. "You're always grouchy."

"Only around you Hangman," Your father chimed in, picking up the football from the sand. "She doesn't like you."

"Wait, really?" Jake asked, poorly acting surprised. "At least you don't hate me."

"Hate would be an understatement," You claimed, rolling your eyes. "Now, can you leave? Dad and I were in the middle of something."

"I want to challenge you," Jake stated. "You and me. Whoever gets a touchdown first buys the other lunch."

"I'm not challenging you Hangman," You denied, shaking your head. "Having to see you every day is already a challenge itself."

"Come on sweetheart, show him what I've taught you!" Your father encouraged loudly. "You can take him easily."

Jake scoffed at Pete's comment but continued to look at you, awaiting your answer. You sighed in defeat.

"Fine. I'll accept your challenge."

Jake's mouth grew wider, his pearly whites appearing clearer and clearer. He turned around and pointed out where your touchdown line was and he pointed out where his way. After everything was established, he shouted at your father to kick the ball. Pete let go of the ball and kicked it straight in the air.

The ball came spiraling down and you and Jake were sprinting toward the area that it was going to land at. You took a leap and surprisingly caught the ball in your arms. You could hear the encouragement from your father as you started sprinting toward the touchdown line.

"Better start running faster [Y/N]!" Jake shouted, right at your tail. "It won't be long until I tackle you to the ground!"

Focus more on where you're going rather than how fast you're going.

The words of your father echoed through your mind as you were coming closer to the touchdown line. It was as if time started slowing down as you focused on where you were going. All of a sudden, you noticed a little ditch in the midst of your path. You took one last leap and jumped right over it.

As you continued to sprint, you heard Jake scream a curse word as he didn't notice the ditch and went tumbling down. A small chuckle fell from your lips. You looked ahead and there it was. The touchdown. You inhaled one last breath and gave it your all.

You cheered to yourself as you made the touchdown. You came to a stop and threw the ball to the ground. You threw your hands in the air in celebration. You turned around, only to be unexpectedly tackled right to the ground by Jake.

You both rolled through the wet sand. Once it came to an end, Jake ended up on top of you with sand all over his face. You chuckled at his appearance.

"I beat your ass," You mocked, sticking your tongue out at him. Jake smirked down at you. "You owe me lunch."

"You wouldn't have beat me if it wasn't for that damn ditch," Jake complained. His eyes were fixated on your lips. You could tell what he wanted to do next. "But before I take you out to lunch..."

Your hand started clumping up some sand as his eyes fluttered shut and he started leaning in. You immediately took a handful of wet sand and shoved it in his face. Jake shouted in disgust as it got into his mouth. You laughed as he rolled off you, spitting out the sand. You climbed up to your feet and brushed yourself off.

"There's a time and a place Hangman," You advised. "I look forward to lunch. I'm hungry."

You gave him a small smile before walking away, leaving Jake even more in love with you. He loved games, especially if you were playing with him. He was happy and so were you.

»»-----　♡　-----««

Thanks for reading!

I do not own this GIF. Credit goes to the owner!

My Wattpad

#imagine #top gun #top gun maverick #top gun imagine #top gun fandom #fanfiction #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin #jake seresin x mitchell!reader #pete mitchell #tom cruise #glen powell #top gun fanfiction

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asrielwithans · 1 year

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Slugcat lineup and some headcanons to go alongside them!

Survivor and Monk are the children of Gourmand!

Monk has a folded ear! For no reason!

The reason that Hunter, Spearmaster, Rivulet and Saint have pupils is because they were artificially created by their respective iterators.

Hunter has hair (fur) because No Significant Harassment thought it would be hilarious, no other reason. Spearmaster has fur because Seven Red Suns thought that NSH had a good reason for giving Hunter hair. This is why you shouldn't copy other people's work.

Enot was the first test version of the Saint, created by Sliver of Straw as a 'prototype'. The experiment was largely unsuccessful. What Sliver of Straw didn't know was that Enot could lay concerningly powerful eggs every cycle.

Nightcat got stuck with Enot after their cycles met, and they eventually formed a very wholesome, if not slightly cursed, sibling-ship.

If Gourmand and Saint were to meet, Saint would be about to ascend Gourmand before they see what a beautiful community he's built amongst the slugcats. Saint would find themselves learning to appreciate the deeper nuances of life rather than being on a quest to ascend everything. Gourmand and Saint would have a mentor/apprentice relationship.

(i forgot where i saw this headcanon, but i love it) Rivulet vibrates for no reason. They'll be standing in place shaking for no reason.

Looks to the Moon will find rubbish to throw for Rivulet so they can run after it and catch it. It's the only way to tire them out other than making them go on fetch quests for her.

Artificer has really sharp claws!! Like really really sharp!! Unlike the other slugcats, her claws literally cannot retract, but she uses them to maul scavengers.

Smoke comes out of Artificer's mouth when she's getting ready to attack.

Five Pebbles and Artificer have a very 'found family' type of relationship, two broken people (cough computer and a fucking slug) finding each other. Artificer has essentially adopted Pebbles and she treats him like her own slugpups.

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i-guess-im-into-this-now · 1 month

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The Apothecary Diaries

S1E5 First Watch

Here's where I watch The Apothecary Diaries for the first time and give my thoughts, analysis, predictions, and occasionally I stumble into a joke.

If you want to start at the beginning:

Episode 1

My character cheat sheet

Basen - shirtless eunuch

Yinghua - pink flowers LIW

Okay we open with a dude panicking while looking at his diseased cursed hands. He isn't familiar to me but he is dressed a lot like Gaoshun, so he's probably a fellow eunuch in the rear palace. The office he is sitting in looks a lot like Jinshi's but maybe that's coincidental.

Oh yeah, the "eunuchs" are practicing sparring - shirtless! (What are the chances this ever gets a live action adaptation AND this scene doesn't get censored?)

The eunuch, Basen, is clearly not a match for Jinshi. Both are sweating but Basen is out of breath and using everything he has in this match. Jinshi on the other hand deftly avoids attacks, easily maneuvers around the yard, restrains himself to smaller more efficient motions, and doesn't bother with an attack until he can land a decisive blow. Jinshi is the superior swordsman and honestly I'd be disappointed if he weren't.

Jinshi easily beats this guy and they both know it, but Jinshi compliments him on his strengths and encourages Basen. We're seeing another side of Jinshi here. One where he is a capable, wise, and motivating leader. He's also earnest, not teasing or manipulative as we have seen him with Maomao.

As Jinshi has a servant lady wash his back, his first questions to Gaoshun are all about Maomao. How is she? How is her health? Do you think she misses me? Okay, maybe he kept that last one in his head. He's still captivated over seeing Maomao's righteous fury last episode and Gaoshun is not sure he likes it. The lady cleaning his back loves it. Everyone in the room knows Jinshi is simping for the apothecary, even if Jinshi thinks he's hiding it well.

Maomao's delighted to find some mushrooms but doesn't want to reveal her secret mushroom hunting location so she decides to meet up with her servant friend Xiaolan instead of going to the kitchen to prepare them. The time at Crystal Pavilion was really stressful on Maomao and she's lost weight. Everyone has noticed from Jinshi to the ladies of the Jade Pavilion. The latter of whom continuously ply her with delicious food. She's come a long way to developing relationships with the people around her. They notice details about her health, they care, and offer her support.

Palace gossip! A servant girl seduced a military officer who infamously hates women. In typical Maomao fashion, she doesn't care. But I do! Is Maomao the servant girl?! Is the rumor about her? Is Jinshi the woman-hating military officer? Military experience would explain his sword skills. Did the back washing lady spread the gossip? Probably not! But here's hoping! Oh, the servant girl in the gossip used an aphrodisiac to do it! Maybe it really is about Maomao!

How cute that Maomao has become such close friends with the doctor. And both of them are positively salivating over the mushrooms Maomao found. Another link in her support network.

The cursed hands mystery is solved as soon as the story is out of the man's mouth. Maomao truly is superior. The palace doctor boasts about her just as Jinshi walks in with an additional compliment. Jinshi has the doctor well trained to disappear so he can talk to Maomao.

Their interaction is a little different today. A little, I don't quite know, inauthentic maybe? Careful? Calculated? I blame Jinshi, he's almost certainly up to something. Maomao greets him politely, with only the barest hint of sarcasm, but she really can't maintain that level of civility with Jinshi because Jinshi is all ✨sparkles✨ today which means he wants something.

Jinshi: Isn't it all right if I just want to stop by and not talk business?

Maomao: Honestly? Absolutely not.

A hilarious riposte, but also very, very true! He's the palace master and it's not okay for him to simply drop in on a lower ranked servant for anything personal. It could easily land Maomao in trouble if anyone thought there were something going on between the two of them. And people do think that! With the rumor that is going around it is even more important that these two aren't found meeting up in any way that isn't absolutely proper.

Jinshi is momentarily disappointed but not deterred. He makes Maomao take a walk with him. Ultimately, she doesn't have a choice but to obey the palace master.

The guy with the burnt hands must have gone to Jinshi before visiting the doctor, because this is why Jinshi sought out Maomao. He asks for her insights on caustic chemicals. Maomao explains to Jinshi how they work then asks if he needs anything else. To which Jinshi asks her to teapot steam his? I don't know what this means. Is he asking her to make him one of the caustic chemical sticks? That doesn't seem right. Maybe something was lost in translation? Or maybe just lost on me. He also says, in a singsong voice:

I'm counting on you Apothecary

And she says:

He knew the whole time?!

And... it is now occurring to my slow processing mind that they are talking about those mushrooms.

I imagine that these wooden sticks are a secret way of sending messages in the palace. You get a stick that is seemingly nothing important, then in secret you burn it to see what color it is. It would explain why there was a set of ladies robes with burnt sleeves in the trash. She probably caught her sleeve on fire while trying to reveal her secret message.

Whatever it is, Jinshi sends Gaoshun to find everyone who has a recent arm burn.

And Maomao is on the edge of something dangerous now. If it becomes known that she exposed the methods of an illegal group, she could end up as a target. Jinshi didn't tell her what is going on, but he knows she is smart enough to figure it out, and he must trust her to handle the information confidentially. She knows this business is nothing good and wants to stay out of it. She really does try.

And I'm realizing why their conversation earlier was weird. Jinshi wanted to give the impression to any listening ears that he wanted to talk to Maomao privately about something personal rather than business related because he doesn't want it known that she is involved in this case. Which means it probably is something dangerous. And also that he cares if something happens to Maomao. Whether that is because she is a useful detective/doctor for him or if he has more personal feelings for her, who can say. Actually, we can. We've been watching this show and it's increasingly obvious that he totally cares about Maomao for all the reasons!

Oh sweet! The emperor is throwing a garden party and Maomao has to go! I am so excited for this, maybe not as excited as Yinghua, but close. We get the run down from Yinghua that the four highest ranking concubines and their retinues will be there. Lady Gyokuyou doesn't have as many ladies as the others so everyone is being called to battle attend including Maomao. And since there is food being served, especially Maomao.

Maomao worries that she'll run into Jinshi at the party to which I say - I frickin hope so! These girls are going to give Maomao a glam up and seeing how Jinshi responds to that is now my greatest desire from this show.

Maomao is nervous but goes through a list of the most likely things to irritate her at the party then makes a plan to mitigate what annoyances she can. Cooking up a medicinal remedy is a no-brainer, but she also sews warming pockets into her undergarments proving that her versatility in solving problems extends outside of medicine. The other ladies beg for her to help them too. This group is a team. They support and care for Maomao and she returns favors in a variety of ways.

But oh shit, how exactly did Jinshi find out about her sewing project? Now she's sewing for him? And... everyone wants them, including the emperor's seamstress and head chef?! That's the cost of being an innovator I suppose.

Okay, so what is the deal with Maomao's arm? Why is this the thing she can't heal? I feel like there is a whole lot more going on with this bandaged arm than simple experiments she tested in it. And oh... it occurs to me that maybe she hasn't been experimenting on her arm to injure herself and test poisons, but maybe she has been experimenting on her arm to try and heal it. Hmmm. Something to consider.

But speaking of harming oneself, Maomao has been working herself to exhaustion, and she's not quitting. *Sigh* Sleep is also an important preparation for the party.

The ladies of the Jade Pavilion are preparing on the day of the party. Lady Gyokuyou gifts jewelry to each of them and the ladies conspire to put make-up on Maomao. They wash her face and discover... she's been altering her appearance to appear less appealing? Uh-oh. That's probably not a sign of anything good. I wondered a few episodes back if Maomao had been sexually assaulted or something similar in the past, and this behavior would align with that. I do hope there is another explanation that I'm not thinking of.

Okay, Jinshi's looking pretty good in his party finery. He's also so excited to see Maomao. Gaoshun refers to Maomao as Jinshi's favorite toy. Not a flattering description. He then complains about how troublesome Jinshi is. So, I guess Gaoshun isn't going to help build this ship then. Unfortunately for Gaoshun, Jinshi doesn't need any help building his own ship.

And thank you Jinshi for giving me everything I wanted from this scene. He hops over to Maomao like a damn fool pretending that he going to look at the baby.

Now, to check in on the princess!

But he's staring at Maomao and trying to get her attention instead of actually going to the baby. He's trying to tease her I think.

And yes, stupefied is a new look on Jinshi. A very good one! It takes him a good long time to come to his senses after seeing Maomao in all her glory. He then asks a very inappropriate question:

Are you wearing makeup?

They then have a confusing conversation where Maomao wishes she would have simply lied to him instead of telling the truth while trying to withhold the truth about her freckles. She finally comes out with it, and unfortunately it's pretty close to what I feared. She managed to escape but men had tried to assault her before. The kidnappers that took her did so illegally and now Jinshi knows that (My thoughts and prayers to their families).

Actually Jinshi does pretty good in his reaction to this news. Taking it seriously, offering his sympathy. He regrets what happened:

If only we could have policed them better.

We? Is this issue something a rear palace manager has any jurisdiction in? Or are you talking on behalf of the empire? Where do you get the authority to criticize or offer apologies on behalf of the empire?

He does seem genuinely sorry that Maomao ended up sold to the rear palace. And Maomao... gives him an out?

I don't particularly mind now. A buyer can't tell if you were kidnapped or just sold off legally. They can't tell, and they really don't care.

And now we see something very genuine from Jinshi. He's a buyer, or he's at least in charge of the people who do the buying. He is culpable in what happened to Maomao and others like her, even if her couldn't tell she was kidnapped when she was bought. And he's especially culpable because he didn't care about the evils of human trafficking until this very moment.

He can't even meet her eyes in this moment. The guilt is so great. He asks:

Doesn't that make you angry?

Maomao, misreading Jinshi's emotional crisis, deals a critical blow:

Of course it makes me angry. But it's not your fault, and what can I do at this moment?

And Jinshi is overwhelmed. He takes a pained breath and you can hear the emotion he's trying to tamp down. He manages to get out a shaky "I'm sorry." And Maomao hears it as authentic. She's not understanding the full meaning behind Jinshi's reaction, but she knows it's real.

He pulls the hairpin from his own guan and puts it in Maomao's hair! And fuck me, I wish I knew the symbolism of that. I can guess it isn't a casual gesture between colleagues. After pausing the scene on the reactions of the people in the Jade palace, I can tell than not a single person present thinks that was a casual gesture either.

Jinshi blushes then promptly leaves. To cry. Or maybe order the execution of some slave traders. Maomao thinks it's odd to have received a man's hairpin, but the other ladies take it as a kind of declaration. Which, yeah. Even Lady Gyokuyou says:

It would appear that you are no longer mine alone.

Implying that Jinshi now has some kind of claim on Maomao. This is going to be troublesome for Maomao. And delicious to watch.

Maomao, flabbergasted, asks what it means. Immediately after which a drum is heard and Lady Gyokuyou says:

So it begins!

And boy, if I ain't ready! Ready for this party, but also ready for Maomao and Jinshi to take the next step.

This is absolutely delightful.

Want to start at the beginning?

Episode 1

Next episode

Episode 6

#the apothecary diaries #apothecary diaries #maomao #jinshi #jinmao

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c-nstantine · 2 years

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Best Interest

Description: In which Jason Todd believes he is the best choice for Y/N (also known as side piece Jason)

Word Count: 0.9k

Warnings: Allusions to sex, friends with benefits, infidelity, cursing

Y/N was currently sitting on Jason Todd's lap kissing him as if he was the last man on Earth. Jason had just finished patrol when Y/N texted him asking if he would come over. On the outside, this looked like Y/N being a needy girlfriend. However, Y/N and Jason weren't even dating. Y/N is currently dating an accountant named Brad but she kept Jason's number on speed dial.

''I got a boyfriend," Y/N said, coming up for air. She pushed her curls out of her face, and she stared into Jason's eyes.

"When have either of us ever cared about that," Jason pulled Y/N further onto his lap and smirked. He unzipped his dark leather jacket, leaving him in his white undershirt.

"I'm being serious," Y/N whined as she lightly hit his chest.

"So am I. You don't love him, and that's why you call me almost every night," Jason pointed out. Their relationship started as a one-time convenience between friends but one time turned into two and two into three. Before Y/N knew it, she had built a relationship with Jason while still having a boyfriend.

"Jason," Y/N groaned as she put her head in the crook of his neck. She was more comfortable with Jason than she would ever be with Brad or whatever his name is.

"What, it's true. He doesn't do any of the shit you like. Hell, you don't even let him see you on wash day," Jason began to list out all of the issues that Y/N had in her relationship. In addition to making a great booty call, Jason was an impeccable listener. He took in every grievance that Y/N had and waited until a moment like this.

"It's not like that," Y/N pouted and began fiddling with her shirt. She may not have been the most appreciative of her boyfriend but she didn't like it when Jason outwardly criticized him.

"Then what's it like? 'Cause to me it looks like you love me and love fucking me, but you're still with his lame ass," When Jason falls for someone, he falls hard. He started this little arrangement with Y/N because he thought he could remain friends. Given the current situation, this can be deemed impossible. Jason thought he could remain friends with someone who he had a crush on before, whose smile lit up his world, whose affection brought him comfort.

"It's complicated," She tried to look anywhere but his face. Jason gently grabbed her chin and positioned it so she looked at him. Her mouth slightly parted.

"It doesn't have to be," It was like Jason's blue eyes pierced into her soul. She only felt this vulnerable when Jason looked at her.

"Jason," She whispered his name like sin on her lips.

"For one night, let's pretend we're a couple," Jason whispered in her ear and chills went down her spine. She eagerly nodded along.

Jason stifled a laugh as he watched Y/N attempt to leave her bed. Y/N's face showed the discomfort that she was feeling. Last night, she couldn't get up to walk so this was an improvement.

"It's not funny," She said as she managed to limp to her bathroom. Y/N texted her boss to call out of work. Between the hickies and the limp, going to work would've been humiliating.

"I think it's hilarious," Jason let out a deep chuckle in his morning voice. He left her bed to begin cooking her breakfast. It was the least he could do considering everything he put her through last night.

"Of course, you do. You're not the one who's sore and covered in bruises," Y/N limped into her living room and laid across the couch. She had a good view of her kitchen which she used to watch Jason's back muscles flex. His back was even sexier considering the nail marks that she left on him. At least we're even, she thought.

"I think you look cute with a limp," Jason responded as he finished up her scrambled eggs and toast. He handed her a plate with a glass of orange juice. Just as he was about to fix his plate, there was a knock on Y/N's door.

"Shit, I forgot he's coming over today," Y/N completely forgot that she was supposed to go on a breakfast with Brad. She attempted to get up but Jason placed a hand on her shoulder.

"No worries, I got it," Jason smirked. He raced to the door and ran a hand through his hair to look semi-presentable, not that it mattered.

"Jason, no, " Y/N knew this would have a bad outcome considering that Jason was only in his boxers but at least Jason didn't have his gun on him.

"Hey, you might be confused at the moment but it's fine. Long story short, Y/N's breaking up with you and I'm her new boyfriend," Jason said opening the door. He opened the door in such a way that only he could be seen and not the rest of Y/N's apartment.

"Wait, what-," To say Y/N's now ex-boyfriend was intimidated would be an understatement. The poor man showed up for a date with his girlfriend and opened the door to reveal a 6'3 tank of a man waiting for him.

"Have a nice one," Jason didn't give Brad the time to respond and just slammed the door in his face.

"You're such an asshole," Y/N said stuffing her mouth with the eggs that Jason had made her.

"But now I'm your asshole," Jason reminded her.

#jason todd x reader #jason todd #jason todd x black!reader #jason x black!reader #x black!reader #x black reader #black reader #black!reader #red hood x reader #side piece!jason #side piece!jason todd #c-nstantine

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mister-eames · 1 month

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hey love, fun question, I’m a firm believer that arthur can lift eames so do you have any idea about the first time it happened and eames and everyone being just so surprised about it?

Hello love! You're not wrong, this is a fun question - and I wholeheartedly agree with you! So, I have this rambunctious, hilarious coworker who is around 5'0, and her work 'party trick' is that she can lift anyone up by putting them on her shoulders - no matter who it is, how tall they are, how much they weigh, she can lift them up. And she has lifted almost everyone. Even the CEO of our company.

Anyway. With that in mind, this is pretty much how I imagine that first time went a little something like this:

"Let me try."

"No, I... almost...ahh... almost got it..."

The party continues on the floor above. And here Arthur is, locked in a cellar with Eames of all people.

For four, long consecutive minutes Arthur has watched Eames struggle to reach the top shelf of marks cellar in an effort to reach a vintage sherry for them to share.

Normally Arthur wouldn't indulge like this on a job and especially not with someone like Eames of all people. But they're stuck in here after all. Why not, Arthur reasons. Everything else has gone ass up, what's another thing to throw into the fire.

They came down here, disguised as party guests, looking for a safe and it's contents within. It's Arthur's fault that they're stuck here - he shut the door for privacy, unaware it would lock them from the inside. They tried to jimmy it open. No luck. They tried to call one of their team. No cell service. No way out until someone comes down.

So when Eames tilted his head towards the Great Wall of Alcohol with a clear suggestion Arthur thought fuck it, if he's gotta be stuck down here he might as well do it boozed up. They're at a party, aren't they?

"Atta boy," says Eames.

So they plucked the first bottle they saw and drank. And drank. And drank. And drank some more. It was on their second bottle of Merlot de la fucking-whatever that Eames spotted the sherry and made an attempt to grab it.

At first it was comical. Watching Eames grunt and groan, defeated by his own vertical deficit. Now it's just getting boring.

"Seriously," Arthur sighs. "Get out of the way."

"No."

"I'm taller than you."

"You are not," Eames scoffs, the exhale slightly strangled as he reaches further, swaying slightly on his tip-toes.

"Seriously."

"I... almost have it... just a little..."

He attempts to extend his arm further, only managing to tip sideways before righting himself.

For fucks' sake.

"Stand still," Arthur orders, stepping forward. "I'm giving you a boost. Don't move."

"You what - ?"

Arthur crouches into a deep squat between Eames legs, pressing the back of Eames' thighs to his shoulders. Before Eames can ask him what he's doing Arthur presses heavily into his heels and raises his arms, locking them around Eames' knees and steadying his stance, ensuring his weight is completely balanced.

Then he pushes upwards into a stand, taking Eames with him.

"Holy, fucking -- " Eames curses, tightening his calves against Arthur's torso as he he steadies himself. "You're fucking barmy."

"And you're heavy," Arthur grunts, adjusting his grip. "Hurry up and grab the damn sherry before I sprain something."

He hears the slide of glass against wood before Eames triumphant "Got it."

Slowly, he lowers back into a crouch, releasing his grip on Eames when both his feet are steady on the floor.

Eames whirls around, cheeks flushed with inebriety. "I'm impressed, Arthur. Didn't know you you had it in you."

Rolling his eyes, Arthur snatches the bottle from his grip, aiming to drink away the remnant feeling of Eames thighs on his shoulders. He twists the cork off with a satisfying pop. "Thank you for the condescension, Eames."

Eames watches Arthur drink a mouthful before passing it over to him. "Do you think anyone upstairs will notice we're gone and come and save us?"

The both look skywards as the bass audibly deepens overhead followed by a chorus of loud cheering from the party goers.

Sighing, Arthur lowers himself to the floor, resigning himself to a long, drunken night ahead.

#spoiler alert: eames has a lockpicking kit all along #inception #arthur x eames

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ohnoanalien · 10 months

Text

Garden

Hi hello! So @lunar-wandering's hiccup hijinks trope is hilarious and @princen-monkie had such a great idea to add to it. I mean, growing flowers when he hiccups? Adorable. It wasn't really asked for, more for lunar to write if anything, but I thought you guys might enjoy it! Soooo...leggo!

---

A silent, warm part of Macaque still wanted Wukong's sunlight. To spend cold nights bundled up between his arms, feeling the soft rock of purring against his un-glamored ears. But those memories and feelings were long gone by now-- or at least, they were supposed to be. It followed him like a curse. It followed him when he woke up. It followed him when MK and Mei showed up at his dojo. And it followed him all the way up Flower Fruit Mountain, tugged along by a favor he owed far, far too long ago to even care at this point.

MK knocked on the door until his fist was a blur. "Sleepoveeer!"

"Psst! Mac." Mei nudged her elbow to his, "Pour me the tea! Did you lose a bet? Save the Monkey King from a crazy immortality-killing demon? What gives?"

"...Crushed a peach." Was her old rival’s only reply.

"Crushed a what-now?" Her brow rose, confusion cut off when the door finally opened.

The Monkey King’s energy was a never-ending ball of light. Despite everything, the golden flame inside him never seemed to snuff out. Which made the nervous grin and ruffled fur a strange change of pace. He glanced at the kids beside him. Seems like the flame did shine a little too dimly today, even for the Monkey King's liking.

A large part of him relished at the view. A tiny, insignificant twinge of pain somehow rose above it. "Soooo…what Wukong-brand chaos do we have to deal with today?"

Wukong startled, "Wh-what? Where'd that come from?"

"I dunno," Mei piped up. "You look kinda jumpy.”

"Jumpy? Me? Psshhh!" Wukong waved a dismissive paw, "C'mooon, I'm immortal remember? I'm fi--" He quickly clamped his jaw shut, body jerking silently.

MK narrowed his eyes, crossing his arms tightly to his chest. He circled his mentor for injuries, not missing the way the stone monkey seemed to sweat under the spotlight. "Monkey King."

Sun Wukong winced, chided with all the energy of a disappointed parent. "L-let's just uh. Head inside, alright? I've got snacks."

MK stood silent, holding his ground as his pacing stopped.

"L-look, I'll explain everything. I'm just...I'm still getting used to…" A blush dusted peach-furred cheeks, "Give me a minute. I promise I'll tell--" Another jolt. A paw hovered over his mouth, and glowing pupils darted around the entrance.

Nothing to see here. Yet.

The cub’s concern was lifted with a small smile. "Alright Monkey King. I trust you." The grin immediately widened when a dirty sneaker passed the threshold, bolting inside with a loud whoop. Mei followed suit, energy intertwining in a chorus of cheering. Macaque stepped halfway through the door before slapping the stone monkey's back.

"...Thanks. For inviting me, or whatever." The shadow demon grumbled. Disappearing into the kitchen Wukong stood there, feeling the outline of his old friend's touch burn against his skin. A small hiccup broke the stunned silence and he quickly closed the door behind him, unaware of the patch of daisies that coated the handle.

"Dibs on the Monkey Mech!" Mei cackled, her shadow casting ominously against the light of the old TV. She pressed a button faster than MK could blink.

"Hey, no fair!"

"Excuse me?? You ALWAYS get to play Monkey Mech! You play him in real life!"

"Well! That's! True! But!" MK opened his mouth. Paused. Then heaved a defeated sigh, aiming his sights on Sha Wujing. The Monkey King stayed quiet, but between the jolt of the couch cushions and the claw that nervously tapped his thigh, Macaque felt something familiar brew in his chest.

"Hey." He muttered, "This is kinda against my better judgment but. You feeling alright?"

Wukong flashed nervous fangs, the beat on his thigh tapping ever-faster. "I said I'd tell you guys later and I meant it."

Macaque narrowed his eyes. A sweet, nostalgic scent brushed his nose. It was just on the tip of his tongue, he just needed to--

Oh.

Ohhhhhhh.

A newfound spark lit in Macaque's eyes, and the Monkey King froze on the spot. The idiot was absolutely not going to tell MK. He knew this. He knew Wukong knew this.

So, with all the grace and care of a long-dead advisor, he leaned forward, tails intertwining. "Look. I get it. It's embarrassing."

Aaand three.

Wukong's cheeks flared again, pouting. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Two.

"Oh c'mon, don't be like that." Despite his smirk, an ink black tail gave its ginger counterpart a small squeeze. "You gotta admit at some point that you have friends now– no one’s gonna judge you. Diyu knows they’ll actually like you more if you let down your guard for like, what, five seconds?"

It was easy to spill his own guts like this. After all, your performance can be pretty believable when your script comes from the heart.

An old friend’s face practically blended with his face markings. "Nope, no way! I’m the Monkey King, I don’t have flaws!"

"Don’t have flaws? Or can’t have flaws? Oh my, is the great king worried the kids might not like it when you don't act like a god 24/7?"

One--

Wukong's eye twitched. "Stop trying to psychoanalyze me! I'm fi--hic!"

The Monkey King slapped a paw over his mouth just as MK paused the game, gasping at the flower crown that blossomed around his headband.

"Whoa!"

"Oooh." Mei felt a silky petal between her fingers, "Pretty!"

"Busted." Macaque sang, wheezing at a sharp smack to the ribs.

Worth it.

"Monkey King!" MK flapped his hands excitedly, "You can make flowers?!"

"'Course he can." Macaque cooed teasingly, pinching a still-burning cheek. He relished the heat between his claws. "He's a perfect, all-powerful deity. Isn't that right, Wukong?"

"Oh, be qui-- hic!-- quiet." He squeaked mid-lecture, freezing up as a small daisy popped on Mei's jacket collar.

"Awww!" She gushed, "You make flowers when you hiccup? That's so cute!"

"I do n-- hic! not!" The flush spread to the stone monkey’s ears as a small arrangement peppered his coat.

"Yyyep." Macaque snickered, plucking a flower from Wukong's tail, earning a yelp. "Flustered or embarrassed and you get a whole garden. Especially for the people he cares abou-- mmph!" A tail wraps around his mouth, smugly meeting an angry glare. Bite completely defanged as he hiccuped again, flowers spreading across the carpet.

"Will you shut up-- ow! You bit me!" Wukong hissed, pulling away to rub at the offending bite mark.

"I dunno what you're so freaked out over. It looks like your little fanboy doesn't seem to mind." The raven-furred monkey hummed thoughtfully, gaze flicking to their audience.

MK stuck out his tongue in concentration as he braided a few into Mei's bushy pigtails. In return she started weaving a flower crown on her lap. "Two headbands are better than one, right?"

Wukong spluttered, eyes wide. He quickly stood up. "I-I. I'll be right back!" Footsteps padded into the kitchen. Macaque's ear twitched as a hiccup traveled through the thin walls, and Mei giggled as a bouquet filled her pockets.

Hearing the squeak of a faucet, Macaque rolled his eyes, hauling himself upwards. He strolled lazily into the kitchen, leaning against the frame. “Water won't help, dumbass. The only cure is telling MK and Mei why you've got ‘em."

Wukong simply stared his warped mirror down, chugging the drink like it was the last drop of water in a desert.

"It's your funeral." Macaque shrugged, earning a pained wince in return. "...Still too soon?"

All at once, the golden flame seemed to flicker and shrink again, and Sun Wukong stared tiredly into the half-empty cup.

Liu’er Mihou didn't like it when he was silent. He HATED when he was silent. The room suddenly felt a little colder, and a shiver ran up his spine. He pried the cup from a shaky grip, replacing it with a gentle paw. He wondered if it would break into pieces if he made any sudden moves.

"Peaches." Mihou took a breath. "I used to blame you for my death. Now I'm questioning...a lot. You don't have to forgive yourself right away. Buddha knows I would. But give me some credit. The wound's still healing, but if you're willing to be patient for once, let me sort my own shit out." He moved his free claws to his partner's fur, scratching gently at the scalp. "And while you wait, you can do me a favor too and stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Deal?"

Sun Wukong swallowed. He opened his mouth to reply-- interrupted by a squeaky hiccup. A flower crown wrapped around Macaque's head, looping over his ears. Hanging around four more that were invisibly fanned out, flicking at the warm sensation.

"Sorry! Sorry, I-I. I couldn't control-- hic! couldn't control it and-- hey! Stop-- hic! stop laughing!"

#lmk #lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid fanfic #@lunar-wandering #@princen-monkie

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cheesewelsom · 1 year

Text

An AU where all their children marry each other. ( hanahaki AU too ) [ and instead of the flowers being the ones the crush likes, it's now what the crush represents ]

( At this point, im too tired of not shipping Incest okay? It's the incest show anyways, save me my scraps of pride. )

Everyone's aged up for the appropriate setting.

Aemond and Lucerys are getting married. Everyone supports it, Even Alicent who everyone thought wouldn't agree because of her religion..

But she does.

The marriage was like basking in Golden sunlight and purple rain, it was beautiful, majestic and the married couples faces looks so much like flowers happily dancing in the wind.

Alicent could almost see her and Rhaenyra's faces standing in front of the alter, saying those vows with thrumming hearts and happy smiles.

Maybe in the past... Far into the past it could've been..

But not now.

[ The flowers are now planted ]

The next wedding, Jacaerys and Aegon's.

She was so proud of him after he changed, spite what everyone told he couldn't, he did and apologized.. even if apologies didn't reach for what he had done, he tried everything to be better. And he was.

He is.

Both Alicent and Rhaenyra were tasked with finding the Priest, Decorations everything..

It felt like she was getting ready for her own wedding, but she couldn't go too ahead of herself.

She asked Aegon about idea's, tossed them around and then she'd report back to Rhaenyra.

Rhaenyra did the same.

Again, she imagined the whole wedding to be hers and Rhaenyra.

[ Flowers come out of her mouth, they look majestic. ]

It was selfish, but it uplifted her spirits.

The next comes in the form of Rhaena and Helaena. She almost pukes.

[ The flowers angerly decided to stay down, rustling in her stomach and thorns scratching her throat )

She didn't know if she could do this, she didn't. This wedding was more taxing than the first two. A lot more taxing.

The only relief if that there is no brown haired person in front of the alter.

The flowers didn't think it was enough, sadly, and they started acting out horribly.

She wanted to be distant with this wedding, but after a few minutes of not talking and being awkward in the room, Rhaenyra had enough and pulled her aside.

" I don't know what has gotten into you? Why are you not putting as much effort as i seen with the other two? Heleana's starting to get nervous and your children- " before Rhaenyra could even finish, Alicent's stomach hurt and her lungs felt like hell, the flowers decided to come bursting out.

And burst out they did.

Cascading down her mouth were a flurry of purple flowers from old.

An old Valyrian Flower, from the place where her fathers model copied from..

Rhyserys represents Freedom, Love, Joy, Fairness, Good-natured and to some lengths, Romantic.

They also represent sharpness, Determination and Protection..

They grow anywhere, in any weather. They're blue fading into purple, flowers on vines, They're full of life, green leaves, and two cool colors.

Now vines are coming out of Alicent's mouth, with a dance of what seems like a hundred flowers, and blood, so much of it attached to the thorns and Rhaenyra's panicking because Alicent might die.

Alicent pulls of the vines, she pulls and pulls until they're out.

"Sorry, couldn't speak.." Alicent mumbled as blood dripped down from her mouth.

Rhaenyra is just looking at the heap of Vein flowers on the floor, with tiny specks of blood. Then she stomps..

"What the fuck are you? and how dare you hurt her! " She keeps shouting at the flowers while stomping at them. A string of angry curses, names, and insults follow.

Alicent just looks dumbfounded and laughs, even if her throat feels like a thousand needs poked through her she still did, her voice sounded terrible, so did choking on blood, but it was hilarious..

Rhaenyra didn't think so as she fussed her towards the Maester even if she told Rhaenyra she was okay.

After the whole family got together after hearing about the visit from the Maester, she told everyone she was alright. She's happy that Rhaenyra kept it a secret.

Next wedding is on the battlefield, Alicent got kidnapped the Targaryens are trying to her back, alot of shit goes down and now Alicent is in the middle of the battlefield, Struck down by an arrow to her stomach, Rhaenyra holding her close as they near the tents.

"Alicent, Alicent please don't close your eyes, don't fall asleep, just listen to my voice okay? " Rhaenyra's voice was scrambled and panicked, a broken foot isn't exactly was she needed right now.

Alicent smiles as she touches Rhaenyra's face.

She was ready to face death ever since she knew the flowers. She read a book about them and how the only way to get rid of them is through confession or being cut open to tear them away with her emotions.

She couldn't imagine herself as a person without loving Rhaenyra, so she didn't.

She kept it all inside, ready to die with her love.. now she can die for her.

"You look so pretty. " She weakly beats out of her lungs, the flower's grow against the arrow.

"Thank you, but now is not the time for that Ali. You can stare at my face as long as you'd like, I'd even stay still as a statue for you, you just need to be there for it, okay? "

"Don't you think the weddings looked nice? We worked really hard on them. "Alicent inched on. It was now or never.

"Alicent, just say yes okay? Just breath for me even if i know it's nearly impossible with the flowers and the the whole arrow but i need you to breath, i need you alive, breathing air, looking at my face, at your children okay? "

"The vows of the seven, it's quite funny how Targaryens have so little faith in them but still use them in matrimonial ceremonies.. is it because the old Valyrian has no records of any rituals? "

"Ali, why are you still talking?? I love hearing your voice, a nice thing to know that you're still alive but if you keep using your breath like this you won't make it. Just please, let me make sure i see you tomorrow okay? Let me hear your voice tomorrow as i force you to finally ride Syrax with me because life is too short already and fate is trying to take you away from me again. "

"Rhaenyra, that almost sounds like a love message. " Alicent would laugh is she could feel her lungs.

"Because it is. " The world stops. " I don't know how you can't even see it, even your son with one eye can clearly see us in front of an altar for all to see yet you still hide. And when i found out that you're were love with another- "

"I confessed first. " Alicent cuts her off, "in- in the book it said that if you let the person you are in love with, see the flowers that have bloomed in your lungs because of them, it is said that you have confessed eternally love for them to see... You practically stomped on my heart which comes in the form of flowers from my lungs. "

"... That's a shitty wedding speech. "

"What? "

"You were talking about weddings, then suddenly bring the fact that i stomped on your confession and called the things that caused you pain, a heart. I had every right of being angry at the things keeping my love in agony. "

"No.. wedding speech? "

"That's the thing you settle on hearing? But yes. I am saying that if you'd like that- "

"Father, Smith, Warrior, Mother, Maiden, Clone, Stranger. " Alicent cuts her off again with a smile.

Rhaenyra rolls her eyes.. " again, i couldn't follow. "

They repeat together.

"I am hers. "

"And she is mine. "

" From this day, till the end of my days. "

"You said plural, that means you owe me more days to come, Alicent now live please. "

"Hm, the flowers are moving the arrow...i really don't think- "

"Don't worry love, we're here. " Rhaenyra looks up to see a Maester, they shove Alicent in and everyone just sits in silence.

The war is done, but Alicent ends up alive but unconscious. It was said that something saved her, a blockage of some kind saved her from the arrows full impact, bad side the shield was down to early..

It takes a couple more moons until alicent started to wake. Rhaenyra was on her side reading through hanahaki disease..

" You know.. someone said that id be fine now. "

Rhaenyra turns to Alicent side eyes and hugged the daylights out of her.

"I thought you were going to turn me in to a widow so soon after our marriage. "

" You're settling on that as our marriage? " Alicent cheekily asked.

"No, our engagement. "

"Really? "

"Of course not Alicent! I would die before the my memories of my marriage OR Engagement were about war and my love one dead.." Rhaenyra takes Alicent's hand and kissed it. "You deserve better than that... But if there was a ' who's had the most dramatic wedding, can we please say that? "

"We can.. we practically did the vows anyways. "

"Sweet, now i can really focus on planning our engagement! "

"So soon? "

"Well...after i found out fate seems to want to tear us apart again and again, it seems like soon isn't too close. "

"I sadly agree.. "

Rhaenyra smiles.

#Rhaenicent #Lucemond #Jacaerys x Aegon #aegon targaryen #jacaerys velaryon #lucerys valeryon #rhaenyra targaryen #heleana targaryen #Rhaena #Alicent Hightower

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swirlysmile · 2 years

Note

Hey i see that ur request are open!!! I wanted to request super angsty thing if you’re okay with it. I wanted a rooster x reader, where the reader is bob’s sister and she get badly hurt because she protect rooster in the uranium mission, so the three of them fell to the enemy territory and when mav and roos wanted to stole the f14 she also stole a plane but got shot at a vital part of her body but made it. She got back to the base but didn’t realize she’s hurt and lose a lot of blood to the point of almost dying until rooster was asking her to come down from her plane and rooster was losing his mind when he sees the bloods. Please make it super angsty where they have to resurrect her in front of roos, i wanted that suspense and angst. Thank you sm🤍🤍🤍

a little switched up, but the idea is the same! i’m not super great at writing angst, so let me know what you think of it.

thanks for the request, i hope i did your idea justice. i have some writers block so requests are taking me a bit longer, sorry!

word count: 3.5k

warnings; somewhat graphic mentions of blood and injuries, ends sort of happily

Conversation

“Bradshaw, as I live and breathe.”

You’re off to the side, opting to watch Hangman and Rooster argue while Bob makes a miserable attempt at cleaning up the drink he spilled. They haven’t noticed you yet, and you’re deciding to make a game out of it. You straighten out your service khakis and play a game of rock paper scissors with Bob before they even think to look your way.

Honestly, it’s kind of hilarious.

You’re more outgoing than Bob, you’d have no problem revealing yourself. It’d be pretty funny to see their faces when you tell them you’d been there the whole time tomorrow, though.

“Well, what do we have here? Another Floyd?” Hangman says. He’s poking at your nametag and you smile uncomfortably, opting not to say anything. Bob is practically thrown a cue stick, and you’re trying not to laugh at his slight distress.

“Hands off my sister, Hangman.” Bob says, a little sheepishly, and Hangman drops your nametag that he was fiddling with. The bell rings for the third time tonight, so you’ve sort of caught on.

“Overboard!” The bar chants, and you don’t really have a great view of the man that Hangman and Coyote are throwing out. When the keys begin pounding, you follow your fellow pilots over to the piano.

What a night.

The next morning, you’re glad that Bob stopped you from having that last drink. You quickly do your hair and rush out of the military issued housing to make it on base in time.

You slide into an empty seat in the back, Bob already being next to Phoenix. Rooster strolls up next to you, making it in in the nick of time before they call for attention.

Honestly, you were expecting to see someone more renowned, certainly much less, what’s the word? Notorious. Rooster's friendly grin shifted into more of a hostile scowl, his distaste for Maverick being made known. You glance over at him in confusion, but the dull thud of an instruction manual hitting the wastebasket makes you snap your head back towards the front.

“So does your enemy.” At this point you wish you had been listening because everything coming out of Captain Mitchell’s mouth is concerning.

“Good morning aviators! This is your captain speaking,”

You’re up in the air right now while Maverick explains the rules. If you squinted and tilted your head, maybe you’d have a chance.

Thanks to Payback and Fanboy’s big mouths though, Maverick is going all out when it comes to his already-fancy-flying. You end up back on the tarmac, cursing them for the 200 push-ups you have to do.

“Lucky son of a bitch!” You say, lightly punching Bob’s arm when he and Phoenix get out of the air. They narrowly avoided the punishment because of Roosters pride.

He’s out on the tarmac now, doing his push-ups.

“I’m gonna go try and figure out his problem,” Phoenix says.

You see them talking for a second, or moreso see Rooster sitting while Phoenix awkwardly squats.

“No luck.” She shares when she returns, not giving you the full story, she’s wiping dust onto her pants. You groan.

You’re having a great time getting to know your colleagues over the course of the week, even enjoying some time with Hangman. He’s not so insufferable once you get to know him, and you’re thanking Coyote who begged you to give Jake a second chance.

Then, you move on from dogfighting and onto flying the course and everything falls to pieces again.

“You just don’t get it. Either a man flies like Maverick here, or a man does not come home. No offense.” Hangman grins at Rooster, glancing at you and Phoenix.

“Yet somehow, you always manage.” Bob says, a tight lipped smile gracing his face. You’re about ready to tackle him yourself, and it had all been so good just 5 minutes ago, but Rooster beats you to it the second Hangman mentions his dad. Mavericks old RIO.

Nick ‘Goose’ Bradshaw.

“I’m cool, I’m cool!” Hangman shrugs everyone’s hands off of him, but Rooster still needs to be held back.

Well, that answers a question.

Not by who should have answered it, but it was known now nonetheless. Rooster did not enjoy the looks of sympathy he was receiving, and the second you were dismissed he made a quick escape, avoiding any further conversation. You’re absolutely livid with Hangman, and the rest of the group is pretty upset with him too. You even hear Coyote say “Too far, man.” and murmurs of agreement are thrown out among the group as well.

At first, you think Maverick is crazy. It’s hot, and you feel pretty sweaty, but after a few minutes? You’re having the time of your life. Your hands are shaking while you hold the football. “Where do I run?” You ask, a little too loudly and Bob throws his hand up, pointing to the left. “Thanks, Bob!” Hangman and Rooster come flying towards you, and your legs start to move.

The group erupts in cheers, and Maverick seems even more sane. This team building exercise was doing wonders for you, for Hangman. Hell, even for Rooster and Maverick. Rooster actually helped Maverick up, and the sight makes your heart swell a little.

“Keep it up, Halo!” You call, taking a sip of your water. These are the people you’re starting to see as family. Sure, it’s quick, but being on a team for an incredibly difficult and dangerous mission brings people together. Rooster joins you, twisting off his bottle cap.

“Hey,”

“Hi Rooster.” You say, and with a minute of awkward silence, you set your water bottle down and run back to the game.

A few more minutes and you’re sweating your ass off, and the only thing that would make this a little better is some frolicking in the ocean. One of the many perks of being stationed in California.

You splash Bob, and he makes it his life’s mission to drown you.

“Siblings,” Phoenix sighs. Rooster watches with curiosity. He never had the luxury of a sibling, someone who’d make him feel less alone. He’d always had his mom, and sometimes Maverick, and occasionally Ice and Sarah, and it sounds so weird to say that they didn’t understand him. They tried their hardest to play and entertain him, but it wasn’t the same. He wasn’t exactly the most popular kindergartener, always talking about planes and such, so he missed out on that too. Luckily, it got better as he got older.

“Don’t just stand there, Bradshaw!” He hears from you, a huge splash of water hitting him. He slides his aviators back on and joins the rest of the team in the water, ready to take revenge.

Everything was great for a little while, minus the not so great parts. Like Admiral Kazansky’s funeral, a man who you’d never had the pleasure of personally knowing. The aftermath was crazy, with Maverick stealing a plane. Then, your mission got bumped up, and it was terrible.

Everyone was right back to being at each other’s throats, specifically Hangman and Rooster. Yay team. Since the mission is bumped up, so is training.

“But nobody has successfully completed the course!”

“Nevertheless, we have to move on.”

You had a bad feeling about this settling into your stomach. Like some sort of void that everything your body uses has dropped into, you feel like an empty husk, like you’re spectating yourself. Especially after the climb out. You missed the shot, much to your dismay, but god the force. Maverick wasn’t lying when he said that your lungs would feel compressed. You aren’t even shocked when moments after you get down, Coyote passes out.

Or at least you don’t feel shocked, but you do feign it. Of course you’re concerned, but you almost passed out yourself.

“Shit, I’m going after h-” Maverick says, and the comms cut out. You don’t know what’s going on, your hands are shaking a little bit. So, Rooster grabbed your right hand, on instinct, giving it a little squeeze. He always did that for Carole when he was little, before she started crying, her hands would shake a little bit. Even when he felt like crying himself.

Then, the reality of it all settled. One of his friends was going down, and he didn’t know whether or not he was okay because of a stupid malfunction.

“m’ okay!” Coyote says, comms cutting back in before going out again, and he thinks that it’s an insane stroke of luck.

“Bird strike!” Suddenly the comms are crystal clear, and your head starts to spin. You grip Rooster’s hand tighter than you were before because, Bob. All of Phoenix’s ramblings about emergency protocol are lost in your head because, Bob.

“Phoenix, you can't save it!” Mav says, and that resonated with you. “Eject, eject!”

Your heart is pounding, practically beating your chest, and then Maverick announces that he saw parachutes. There’s still a chance Bob isn’t okay, but you’d take a chance over knowing he most definitely was gone.

Your hand relaxes a little bit, so Rooster lets go. He didn’t know how thankful you were for his gesture, but no way in hell were you going to tell him.

“They’re alright Rooster, just being kept in the hospital overnight for observation.” You hear through the door, and maybe it’s not your place, it’s definitely not your place, but you’re curious.

“Why did you do it?”

“Wha-“

“Why did you stand in my way!”

You can practically feel the wince that Maverick is wearing.

“You weren’t ready.”

“Ready to what? To fly like you?”

“No!” Maverick snaps, and you think that you’ve heard enough. The brisk walk down the hall feels much longer than it actually is due to the shouting.

It’s hard to hear your family fight.

The next day, everything is relatively normal, minus the glares that Rooster shoots Maverick. He hadn’t done that for a whopping week and a half. How do you even bring that up? Hey Rooster, bud, I have to be honest. I was eavesdropping yesterday, you good?

Definitely not.

So, you didn’t. Didn’t ask about it, didn’t think about it, didn’t pay it any attention. “You okay?” Bob asks with worry. Your face is scrunched up in a mixture of confusion and sorrow, and you send him a measly thumbs up in confirmation. Some things you just can’t speak about.

The next day, your head was spinning. Goosebumps adorned your arms, and you weren’t so sure vomit wouldn’t decorate your uniform. Today was the day, would you be picked, would any of your family be left to die? It was terrifying.

“Phoenix and Bob,” Your heart drops a little knowing he’d be out there, “Payback and Fanboy.”

“For my wingmen, Rooster and [callsign]” Bob shoots you a look, and you’re not sure if he's pissed or excited for you. You and Rooster share this glance, one that’s like Holy shit? This is happening? You hadn’t talked to him much since Bob had to eject, nerves getting the better of you.

“Good luck.” Maverick says.

You’re sitting in the common room in the carrier, probably far past the acceptable hours, getting into your own head. Psyching yourself out. Rooster could relate, so he steps out of his room using water as an excuse.

“Hey,”

“Hi Rooster, what are you doing up?”

“I could ask you the same thing.”

“Touché.”

He snorts and grabs a cup, heading towards the tap.

“I’m thinking a bit too much.” You say, twirling the class ring on your finger. “About this mission, I’m actually scared.” He takes his cup of water and comes to plop down next to you on the couch.

“Me too.” It sounds more like a confession than anything, than a comfort.

Then, he does it again. He sees the shake in your hands, puts down his cup, and grabs your hand. The one closest to him.

“We can do this,” He affirms.

“We can do this.” And you go to bed more confident than you’ve been in a while.

You step out of your room, trudging through the narrow halls while you attempt to get to the runway. Everything is basically set up, you’re just being re-briefed and then thrown out there.

“Give ‘em hell,” Hangman says to Rooster. Rooster is surprised that Hangman didn’t come up and harass him for Mavericks' choice, it’s as if they have some unspoken pact now.

“Bob, be safe.”

“You too,”

“Don’t do anything stupid,”

“Tell that to Phoenix.”

“I won’t!” She calls over the wind.

“I love you,” You say to Bob, then it’s like clockwork. You “saddle up” and prepare for possibly the hardest mission of your life.

“Good luck,” Rooster calls out to you just before you climb into the cockpit. You send him a half assed salute, nerves taking over.

You felt like you were on autopilot, doing everything asked of you when it was asked of you. You’re flying behind Payback and Fanboy as a last resort in case Rooster missed. “Speed up!” They say, and when the plane in front of you starts to move, you clutch the yoke a little tighter and follow. It’s underwhelming to hear “We made contact!” and even “Smoke on the air!” On Maverick and Phoenix's end, even if you’re worried for Bob.

“Dammit, this laser isn’t working!”

“That’s it, I’m dropping in blind”

You’re close behind, but not too close, so when the huge explosion happens you’re still climbing. “Success!” You speed up even more, rushing to enter Coffin Corner.

“Smoke in the air!”

Once it’s you being targeted, you become much more aware of your surroundings. You start effectively communicating, the shock of the situation wearing off.

“Shit, I’m out of flares!” Rooster says. Maverick immediately switches course, his plane getting blown up in the process.

“I didn’t see a parachute!” You're still trying to shake some SAMs, but the second that more are on Rooster's tail, you’re rushing to help him. Maybe it’s stupid, it’s definitely stupid, but you cant watch him go down too. “[Callsign] no!” Bob shouts, but it’s too late. You’ve already intercepted, taking the likely fatal blow. “No,”

The last thing you remember is pulling the ejection handles a little too late, winding up too close to the crash and passing out.

The second you wake up, there’s a searing pain in your wrist and ribs -but you conclude that they’re definitely not broken. You’re bleeding through your flight suit, pieces of shrapnel impaling you in various places. God did it hurt, but you’re not a pilot for nothing, so you brush it off as best you can.

“Hello?” You utter, attempting to see if your comms were still working, and when you receive no reply you sigh. It’s likely they won’t send a rescue chopper for another few days, if they even decide to. They lost two pilots already, and Cyclone definitely wouldn’t risk more.

“We can’t circle back,”

“Rooster, they’re gone.” Bob says, holding back some tears. He’s trying to keep a level head, but Rooster won’t say anything. “Rooster!” Payback calls the second Rooster turns his plane around, but his mind is made up.

He’s going back for Mav, he’s going back for you.

Maverick is contemplating his life decisions, two life threatening crashes in the span of two months? Maybe he needs to reevaluate his piloting, but his thoughts are cut short when the whir of an enemy aircraft approaches. He’s dropping all his gear in an attempt to run, his radar, his parachute, everything. Maverick hops over a fallen tree, ducking down to avoid the shots being fired. When the aircraft follows him, he thinks he’s done for. And he didn’t even make up with Bradley.

It’s cold, and it hurts to move. You’re shaking with every step, but if you’re correct and not hallucinating from blood loss, you saw something go down -or up- in flames. It’s dangerous to have hope, but hope may be the only thing saving you now.

“What were you thinking?!” Mav shouts, equal parts annoyance and anger.

“You told me not to think!” Rooster yells back with just as much ferocity. They stand there for a second before he awkwardly clears his throat.

“It’s good to see you.”

“It’s good to see you too,” Rooster chokes out.

There’s a thud in the snow alerting both Maverick and Rooster. They turn their heads to see you fall into the snow, and Rooster is rushing to get to you.

“[Callsign]! Are you okay?”

“Just peachy, Rooster.” You cough a little bit while he pulls you up.

Maverick immediately gets to work, doing his best to temporarily patch the wounds you procured.

“All done, now let’s go.”

You’re still a bit woozy, and definitely need some better patchwork, but that will have to wait until you’re out of this hellhole. You’re sitting on a ledge, staring down at the blown up runway. There are two planes, and Maverick has the bright idea of stealing them.

“Mav, no, this is not a good idea!”

“Best one we got,” He says

“She can’t even fly!”

You sigh and roll up the sleeves of your flight suit. “I’m trained for this Rooster, we’re trained for this. I can do it,” Your voice quivers a little bit, as if you're unsure of yourself. Maverick runs off anyways, leaving Roosters' protests in the dust. You follow at more of a hobble, and that’s when Rooster decides to go.

Before you hop into the plane, you try fiddling with your suit, hoping it will make the comms work again. It doesn’t, so you’re flying with minimal communication.

“See you on the other side,” You nod in appreciation.

It’s harder than you thought it would be, trying to follow Maverick’s lead without the guidance of his voice, but you’re the best of the best. If anyone can do it, it’s you, and the graduates selected for this mission. Even with impaired judgement, you’re following along. Down in the canyon, you’re being shot at. You narrowly avoid any bullets hitting your plane, but Maverick and Rooster aren’t so lucky. When they finally shoot the plane down, the pilot ejects.

Then you race out of there, being met by even more hostile jets. Your consciousness is bordering on loss, but you’re trying your hardest to push through. The sound of shots being fired, at you, is what snaps you out of it. The pain of being shot a few more times doesn’t really register, you’re already aching all over.

Then, Hangman saves the day. You’re assuming he says something cocky, but without working comms, you don’t know. It’s just you, the roar of the engine, and your thoughts.

The second you land your plane, you take notice of the celebration crowding Maverick and Rooster. You hop out, and the second you do the weight of your injuries hits you, and you drop.

“[Callsign]!” Both Bob and Rooster are shouting, Maverick is trying to find a medic, and Phoenix is standing there in shock. Your eyes drift to a close, the world around you fading into nothingness.

Maverick brings a medic back onto the runway, they don’t even try to bring you down to the medical wing. It’s too urgent to wait that much longer, so the man drops down to his knees to make sure you’re still alive.

“She’s not breathing!” He says, and Rooster's head is spinning. He’s pinching himself while they try to save you, like this is all some kind of sick dream that he’s having. One that’s going to mess him up for the real mission, but the pinches aren’t doing anything. It’s real, scarily real.

Blood is literally covering your flight suit, and he wants to say “Great Mav! You did a bang up job!” but he knows it’s not the older pilot's fault. He knows that it’s his fault.

Even Hangman is staring, in a mixture of awe and worry. Phoenix is hugging Bob, having snapped out of her daze while Fanboy is running around trying to help.

“She’s breathing,” The medic says, sounding sorrowful. “but she’s unstable, get a stretcher up here!”

Rooster swears it was the scariest moment in his life, seeing you dragged away on that stretcher before he had the chance to have a real, good, and not awkward conversation with you.

Hours later, and there’s still no news. Rooster wishes it was anything but anxiety swelling within him. Pride? Totally, sign him up. He’s sure Bob is feeling just as bad, if not worse. Poor guy is literally shaking in the corner.

“She’s fine!” Maverick bursts into the room, the loud slam of the door making the group of pilots jump. “She’s out of surgery, and she’s alive. [Callsign] won’t be awake for a few more hours, but she’s alive.” He sounds exasperated and exhausted and excited all at the same time.

You bet that he was in there right as you woke up, second only to Bob.

“Hey,”

“Hi Rooster.”

He’s holding your hand, the same way he did when Bob went down, and the feeling makes your heart race a little bit.

“Can I kiss you?” He says, and the nod he receives is all he needs.

So much for conversation.

#rooster x reader #bradley bradshaw x reader #rooster bradshaw x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #bradley ‘rooster’ bradshaw x reader #rooster #bradley bradshaw #rooster bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley ‘rooster’ bradshaw #top gun #top gun maverick #top gun fic #top gun maverick fic #swirly writes

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eemcintyre · 1 month

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"Seawolf: The Pirate's Curse" (2005) review

Surprisingly, honestly... why did I enjoy this? I guess after a couple of major misses for me in the form of "The Kidnapping" and "Beyond Forgiveness", my expectations were appropriately low, but this one actually had some likable characters and humor, and that always manages to rope me in. I have a soft spot for fun, silly action fare like this bc of childhood shows like "The Greatest American Hero", I think.

So, the title never makes any sense... what was it supposed to mean? what curse?

First and foremost, I must say TIG is looking oh-so-very pretty and rugged here- the necklaces, the bandanas, the curly-q hair, the tank tops, the sweaty, the ARMMMSSSS 😩

Initially had absolutely no clue what was going on in the beginning; a bunch of people with weird ass outfits in the dark and I was just like please no don't let that be him in the damn fucking cape and eyepatch and o n e l e g; I was like he can't possibly have one leg the whole time, right?? 🤨

But yeah I was definitely experiencing the "dear God what did I get myself into, cheers to another awful mess" 🫡🥂

Why does half the audio sound dubbed (particularly everything that comes out of Rachel's mouth)? Also props to Rachel for being the most emotionally unaffected person ever bc her reactions were so disproportionately calm to what would happen if my bf was constantly disappearing overseas and totaled my gorgeous pink car

We're getting some very Max Parrish-type hooting and hollering up in here; a concise summary of Thorpe is that he's basically if Max had a boat and was an alcoholic instead of a drug addict

We get another hallmark of TIG's movies with a slew of incredibly cringe one-liners that elicit a physical reaction of pain from me, but for every few there was actually a genuinely funny one here and there, so I'll allow it this time...

The whole "I'm a pirate, my father was a pirate, etc." speech had me ROLLING and NOT IN THE WAY THE WRITERS INTENDED I THINK BC HUH??

When he met Helene in that random room full of paintings I was sure we were supposed to take it that the mission was smth art theft-related. but no she just has a passion for maximalist design ig.

Why does the camera get randomly shaky for no reason? Very avant-garde of them

Am I the only one who thinks that Carlos looks like a Walmart George Clooney? Someone else pls tell me I'm not insane

Always throws me off-guard but it's such fun to see TIG in an uncharacteristically light scene like the one where he's dancing in the parade and surrounded by the circle of dancers in the bar. At least he seemed like he was having a good time in this movie 🎉

Ramon and his lil book and the bar scene of Thorpe and Helene drunkenly arguing w each other and sitting on the side of the road was what really started to sell me

anD THEN HE FKIN DR A G S HER ASS 😂

Plus I cannot go without mentioning my appreciation for the way he was holding her knee 👀💕

Love how he spends the majority of this movie just dressed like someone's hot dad who works out, in his cargo shorts, tank top and goatee- oH WAIT IT'S BC HE IS A HOT DAD WHO WORKS OUT IN REAL LIFE

Love how Carlos and all the other villains are devoid of personality or motive except for ~money~, like "the Colonel" doesn't even have a name!!!

Was genuinely stressed that my boy was going to clock himself in the head when he was swinging that rope trying to scale that building

When Helene straight-up PUNCHED HER SISTER IN THE FACE like these ladies have some beef and I need to know where it stems from

This film is another great example of TIG's grossly underutilized comedic potential- a là the map reading scene

Hilarious how Carlos just shrugs like "I don't care, whatever I guess" when who he believes to be Marlena says she wants to say a dramatic goodbye to Thorpe

Ok but how did he not die?? Thank goodness but how??

Even more hilarious how the Colonel, who has had nothing but hatred and murderous intent for Thorpe throughout, is just so touched by Thorpe's being a ✨ big softie with morals ✨ that his vengeful compulsions are soothed and he's content with taking the gold like "hey bro, we're square now <3" and just fuckin walks away

Good on them for giving the treasure back to Mexico

Was legit concerned for too long there that they weren't actually going to end up together and I was screeching

DO THEY ACTUALLY USE THE SAME SHOT OF THE BOAT AT SUNSET IN THE MIDDLE OF THE MOVIE AND AT THE END?? lmaooo

Honestly, I think they could have leaned even more into the humorous aspect and the treasure hunt part of the film; made it a bit more of a National Treasure/Indiana Jones sort of thing, and I definitely would have liked some more character development, esp. for the sidekicks and villains, but overall, I award this film an unexpected 6/10. I had a good time 🙃🩷

#thomas ian griffith #the pirate's curse #seawolf #seawolf: the pirate's curse #jeffrey thorpe #film review #movie review

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sea-owl · 1 year

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Oh Colin is gonna go absolutely feral once his queen comes back 8 months pregnant waddling around the palace like a penguin like he's one snap of a hairthread away from bubble wrapping Penelope and locking her away in a tower. Francesca had to give him a potion to calm his ass down because he quadruple checked every crook and cranny of the palace in the last hour making sure its baby proof. This himbo king is gonna fistfight the wind if it made Pen shiver and eradicate every dust particle in the underworld if Pen sneezed ONCE. Like please give me my himbo king who's stupidly in love and goes batshit insane at anything that even mildly inconveniences his queen i love him 😂

Anonymous asked: Please, please tell us more about pregnant Penelope’s return to the underworld. I’m just picturing the scene in my head, and it’s either cute or hilarious.

I'm dying. I made Lord Featherington a wind god in this. So now I'm imagining Colin fistfighting him because HOW DARE HE MAKE COLIN'S WIFE AND THE QUEEN OF THE UNDERWORLD SHIVER! It can be a bonding experience for Colin and Portia.

Here's something on Penelope's return.

"Thank you Phillip," Penelope said as they were finishing their trek into the Underworld. "I know it hasn't been easy with me and Eloise being pregnant at the same time."

Phillip shook his head. "She is my wife and you are my friend Penelope. Plus it is quite literally my job to guide souls down to the Underworld, the queen being no exception."

Penelope giggled as she opened the door to Bloomsbury Palace, and then she blinked. She looked again and yup someone completely redecorated the inside. It looked like someone remade the inside of the palace into a pillow fort. Wall the walls and floors were made out of the squish material. Every piece of furniture looked like it had it's corners rounded off, while the vases that held Penelope's plants were now fastened to shelves on the walls. Actually Penelope didn't mind the shelf design, maybe she get some for her office.

"Penelope," Phillip whispered, his eyes taking in the scene around him. "Do you want me to stay a little longer?"

"No, no," Penelope said. "Eloise is waiting for you. I'll find the others soon enough."

"Are you sure?" Phillip asked.

"Yes. Now go before Eloise decides to another fish in the twins' beds," Penelope said.

Phillip shuddered. It took forever to get the fish smell out of Amanda's bed the last time Eloise did that. Phillip hates fish too so that had not been fun.

Penelope waved her friend and right hand goodbye before turning back to what used to be her home.

"I'll guess I'll look in the throne room first," Penelope muttered to herself.

Penelope began her waddled and immediately began cursing whoever authorized this change. This was not easy for her to walk on, and her balance was already not that great with the baby kicking all over Penelope's stomach. About ten steps in Penelope gave up and used her powers to float around the palace.

The throne room wasn't any better as it was covered it the same pillow material as the rest of the palace. Hell her throne looked to be made out of this material too! What the hell was going on?

"Oh thank Chaos you're home!"

Penelope looked up to see Francesca running forward as fast as she could on the pillow floor. It wasn't that fast to be hones.

"Fran what is going on?" Penelope asked.

"Your husband has lost his damn mind!" Francesca exclaimed. "Colin has turned the entire palace into this! Everything and anything has been baby proofed. The guards don't even wear their normal armor instead he's given them this stuffed padding. I thought Felicity was fistfight him when he suggested damming the rivers near the palace because 'what if the baby fell in?'"

"Why would the baby be even near the rivers?" Penelope asked.

Francesca threw her hands up. "That's what we said!"

Penelope's hand covered her mouth as she looked around once more. Oh shit this was all her husband's doing. "Let me talk to him. Where is he?"

"In your room," Francesca answered. "Michael dumped him there after I gave him a potion to knock him out for a few minutes of peace. It should be wearing off soon if it hasn't already."

Penelope nodded and teleported to the room she shared with her husband. Colin was indeed awake and . . . Penelope wasn't quite sure what he was doing.

"Husband," Penelope called out.

Colin looked up and his face brightened. "Pen!" Teleporting to her said Colin pulled Penelope in for a kiss. "My beautiful wife, how are you?"

"Very confused," Penelope said. "Colin what is going on? Why does our home look like the inside of a pillow fort?"

"I'm helping you!" Colin answered with a grin. "I baby proofed the palace."

Penelope did not return her husband's smile. This in turn caused Colin's to fall. "What's wrong Pen?"

"Colin this is more of a hinderance than anything. I can't even walk properly," Penelope answered truthfully.

Colin's face fell further. "Oh."

An idea came to Penelope's mind, something she's been excited to try for when she finally came home. She had seen Phillip and Eloise do it. Penelope had been jealous of the bliss that had been on Eloise's face. "I do have a way you can help me though if you turn everything back to the way it was before."

Colin looked up "Oh?" He snapped his fingers and the marble walls and flooring came back.

Penelope turned around and pulled her husband to her back. Placing his hands underneath her stomach. "Gently lift and hold it," Penelope instructed.

Colin did just that and Penelope could have sworn she could have moaned at that moment. She would swear the feeling was better than what they did to put the baby in there. The pain in her back had elevated and her head fell back against her husband.

At that exact moment baby decided it didn't like being ignored and kicked where daddy's hand was.

Colin looked down at Penelope. "Was that?"

Penelope nodded. "Yeah, that's baby."

Pure and utter adoration covered her husband's face. Kissing the side of her head as his thumbs massage against her stomach.

Penelope felt at bliss. Though this did prove to her that for all future kids she has to plan them so she gives birth in the Underworld. If Colin was like this the she was gone for most of her pregnancy Chaos only knows what he would do should she give birth up on the surface.

#bridgerton #spring's rebirth #polin #hades and persephone au #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington

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spenceswife · 2 years

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“But thats my girl.” Part 2

Word count 600

Summary: Peter has a crush on his long term best friend and struggles on what to do about it. But what will happen when she’s on the other side of the door listening to his confession to Ned.

Warning: Self doubt/ Insecurities

AN: First Peter Parker story hope you enjoy! TOLD IN PETERS POV

Part 1: https://eddiesmunsonswife.tumblr.com/post/689091186179391488/thats-my-girl

“Y-Yn hey.” I tried to act natural as if she didn’t just hear my dying love for her. Her mouth still dropped Ned waved in her face bringing her back into reality. When she snapped out the trans she immediately looked at me and turned red.

“I- um I brought cookies.” She smiled clearly embarrassed as she walks past me putting the sweets on the dresser. “Ah thanks were gonna need the sugar for putting this bad boy together.” Ned pointed to his lego set as she smiled awkwardly sitting on the bed.

After a while everything was still awkward and we could all feel it as sat in a Circle putting the pieces together. “Soo um I’m gonna see if May needs help with something” Ned chuckled weirdly and left the room. I mentally curse him out for leaving us in this awkward situation.

We sat in silence for at least minutes until she spoke up. “You know I’m kinda offended you thought I would date Flash” she giggled lighting the mood. My lips pressed together finally let go with a small exhale.

“So you heard? All of it…” You looked down playing with one of the lego figures. “Yeah I did.” She sighed looking away. “I’m so sorry Yn I never meant for this to come out I knew it would ruin our friendship.” She quickly looked back at me and shook her head.

“Peter I never said anything bad about it. I’m just surprised that you like me..” It was my turn to look confused and shake my head. “What do you mean?” We scooted closer a bit “I- um I dont know why you would like me. Yes I heard your whole conversation but its me Peter. You deserve someone way better.” She scoffed.

“Yn are you crazy? I dont know why someone wouldn’t like you. You’re literally the coolest girl I’ve ever met its crazy. And your so sweet, you put people before you, your hilarious, we get along great, and your so beautiful too. I dont know why you wouldn’t be loved.” I gently put her hand in mine rubbing the back of her palm.

“Peter I like you too. For a long time now. I just didn’t know how’d you feel probably grossed out.” She sniffed looking away. “Hey hey never. I’m just glad the truth is out” she smiled turning back towards me. Putting her hand on my cheek she rubbed my pinkish skin.

“Peter” she whispered “Yes Yn?” I gulp hopefully she didn’t hear from my nervousness “Can.. Can I kiss you?” Not even a second later my lips were on hers putting my hands on her cheek pulling them in. She pulls back gasping for air but hurries back in. But before we could pull away the door opens.

“O-oh my.” May smiled taking a picture with her phone cheesing “I TOLD YOU MAY THEY WOULD BE MAKING OUT.” Ned yelled from the living room. Yn quickly hid in my chest from embarrassment “Oh god” I yell shooting the door closed with my webs.

1 year later.

Yn and I are standing at our lockers talking about our plans later for our 1 year anniversary When Ned skips through the halls.

“Sup my favorite couple of the year I have a gift for you two.” He giggled sinisterly getting a rolled up poster out his bag. “Ok.. I wanna see!” Yn clapped. I chuckle waiting for our surprise with my arm wrapped around her waist.

“Feast your eyes on this.” He yelled opening up the rolled paper the stretched out arms length. “Ned buddy. I know that isn’t the picture of our first kiss.” I laugh embarrassed at the way our faces looked shock in the picture.

My body covering up Yn’s as we sat crisscrossed on the floor, her arms around my neck and mine on her face as we look back with wide eyes as the flash reflects on our skin.

“Put that away before someone sees” she quickly snatched it away giggling. “I knew you guys would love it” he smirked as we headed to class.

#fluff #female reader #angst #spider man far from home #spider man homecoming #spider web #spiderman #tom holland #friends to lovers #peter parker #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x reader #ned leeds

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bitterlybisexualbard · 2 years

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What Makes an Ass of U and Me

Three times Jaskier was mistaken for someone's spouse and one time he made everything official

Also available on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/40889484

1. Yennefer

Given that their joking nicknames for each other include 'husband', 'wife', 'feckless layabout' and 'wicked witch', among others, it isn't too much of a shock when it happens.

Geralt, who has never understood their newfound friendship and is still working through his own twisted up feelings about Yen, is far more thrown by it than either of them. "They're not married," he snaps at the poor, bewildered barmaid.

"Don't mind him," Jaskier tells her cheerily, "he's just jealous."

Geralt gives him a sharp look, which Jaskier ignores entirely. Geralt can look as threatening as he wants over it, Jaskier is not going to be cowed by the ex boyfriend of the woman he's pretending to be married to just because the man doesn't know how to express his emotions in a healthy and productive manner. Geralt can use his words or he can go fuck himself.

The girl's unsure gaze flickers between them and off behind them towards Yen, but she turns and gets their drinks as requested and Geralt even manages to look a little apologetic as he takes his from her. Well, mostly he just looks constipated, but then that's how most emotions look on Geralt anyway when he actually lets them show on his face.

Yennefer seems torn between amusement and concern at Geralt's shift in mood, but doesn't seem to know how to bring it up. Things are still fragile between them, and as much as he might once have revelled in their fractured relationship and gloated about her lack of surety, Jaskier finds himself hating it now.

"It seems Geralt disapproves of our marriage, my dear," Jaskier says with an overwraught sigh. "Whatever shall we do?"

Yennefer's mouth twitches. "What are you blathering on about now, bard?"

"Our love is doomed. Cursed by the shadow of your former lover's resentment," Jaskier bemoans. He turns to Geralt pleadingly. "You must give us your blessing, Geralt. I know it's hard for you to see us both move on this way, and we'd never want to hurt you, but surely you know the heart can't be reasoned with? It isn't our fault that we were both cursed with such irresistably good looks and otherworldly charisma. It was bound to happen sooner or later."

It's possible Jaskier's already had rather a lot to drink over the course of his set, and on rather too little to eat before he performed. Usually, he holds with the rule of only one drink before and one drink during his performance, but they have such ridiculously tiny flagons here that he'd woefully misjudged how much he was drinking.

Regardless, it works. Yennefer laughs, either at his words or his antics, and the tension around her eyes lifts as she grins at Geralt.

Geralt pouts. Jaskier's definitely calling it a pout.

Ciri finds the whole thing utterly hilarious. Mostly because of Geralt's pout.

2. Ciri

It happens fairly regularly from there on out, and it's the one thing Yen still allowed herself to be a bitch to Geralt over, because he's never said a word about how much it pisses him off. They'll be mistaken for a married couple and both Jaskier and Yennefer will play along with it gleefully, only partly to mess with Geralt, and then they'll wander off to their separate beds and occassionally their separate roads when their travels lead them in different directions.

Yen's travels had taken her to Sodden again, which she insisted was fine and wouldn't hear a word about them accompanying her, just the other day, which is probably why it takes Jaskier a moment.

"Yes, well- Wait," he turns in place with a frown, looking back towards their table where two figures sit, neither of them Yennefer, and then at the innkeeper who'd offered them the only double bed for rent in the place on account of his wife being such a pretty little thing. "My wife?"

The innkeeper nods and looks unerringly at the table Jaskier had come from to negotiate their rooms and board for a couple of nights. "Poor thing can't be used to travelling just yet. Probably do her some good to-"

"Wait," Jaskier says again, a horrifying conclusion coming together in his head far too quickly for his liking. "You mean Ci- the um, the blonde girl over there?"

The innkeeper nods again, frowning this time. "She not the missus?"

"No! Gods, no!" Jaskier sputters. He shudders. "She's barely fourteen!"

That information doesn't seem to horrify the innkeeper the way it should. He shrugs. "My mistake. Did you still want the double room?"

Jaskier tries desperately to blink away the stomach churning idea of sharing a bed with Ciri. He's done so before, platonically he'd like to stress -- he's no nonce for Melitele's sake -- but with the assumptions levelled at him by the possibly quite noncy man in front of him, he doubts whether he'll be able to do so again for quite some time without feeling all manner of uncomfortable and icky.

"On second thoughts, I'm not sure the coin'll stretch. We'll, ah, we'll just have to be on our way," Jaskier says, avoiding the man's eyes.

"You're a bard, right? The one who sings about Witchers?" The man doesn't wait for his faint nod to confirm. "Play us a few tunes and I can give you a discounted rate."

"No, no. I'm afraid I couldn't possibly," Jaskier fumbles out. He waves his hands with a flash of desperate inspiration. "Terrible arthritis with all the rain," it hasn't rained in days, but the words come regardless. "Can't play a note."

He escapes back to the others as quickly as is possible.

Geralt glances up at him questioningly, while Ciri doesn't look away from her hand. Geralt's been teaching her gwent. She's... not picking it up as quickly as she does most things. The girl is not designed for subtley or subterfuge and cannot bluff to save her life, on top of which, she's more brash and impulsive than even Jaskier, making strategy and forward thinking a weak point for her. Which, of course, Geralt had stoically insisted was the real reason for teaching his almost-daughter to gamble; to strengthen those weaknesses. He also claims it was Lambert's idea about half the time.

"We should go," Jaskier says.

Geralt sighs. "Don't tell me this is another inn you've been blacklisted from but forgot?"

Jaskier laughs, but his heart isn't in it. He isn't sure quite why this has affected him so badly. One nonce of an innkeeper assuming something stupid with absolutely no basis for it shouldn't get to him like this. But he regardless, he doesn't like the thought of Ciri sleeping under the same roof as a person who thinks that's a reasonable thing to assume or a normal thing to happen. "You know me too well, my friend. If we want to find somewhere else for the night, we should be off."

Ciri glares at him as Geralt gathers up the gwent cards and he shoots her an apologetic smile and positions himself as far away from her as possible on their way out of the inn, all too aware of the creep's eyes on them as they leave.

"What was that really about?" Ciri asks suspiciously, Geralt's mild look of curiosity evidence that he hadn't bought the lie either.

Jaskier winces. "I'd rather not talk about it."

"Jaskier," Geralt says threateningly.

And Jaskier knows it's at best an empty threat, and at worst he'll just be made to take the uncomfortable bed or the floor should the next place they find not have proper accomodation for them all, but he also knows Ciri is like one of those annoying small dogs women like his mother keep around. She's tiny and delicate looking, but she's scrappy and loud, and once she gets it in her head to clamp her jaws around something, no amount of shaking will get her to let go of it (Jaskier will neither confirm nor deny that he has a scar on his ankle from one such goblin hound. He'd like to say he gave as good as he got, but he never could bring himself to hurt animals. Even deserving ones).

After a moment of consideration, he decides to try to play it off light heartedly. Maybe if he treats it as such, the whole thing will become a darkly funny story he can look back on and laugh at. "Geralt, be honest, does this hairstyle make me look like one of those odious poets who chases around young women because the know people their own age won't be impressed by their terrible poetry?"

Geralt narrows his eyes. "What?"

Ciri raises an eyebrow.

"Only, I thought it looked rather dashing and- and mature. Less 'courtley troubadour clinging onto youth' and more 'rugged, worldly bard whose raw magnetism negates the need for pomade'," Jaskier continues, hoping focusing on his vanity will irritate and bore them enough that they'll let the subject drop.

"Did the innkeeper think you were after his daughter or something?" Geralt asks, mildly amused. He's in a very mild mood this evening. Jaskier would hate to ruin it by informing him of his almost-daughter's recent proximity to a nonce.

"Not his daughter, no," Jaskier hedges, mumbling with revulsion and embarrassment.

Ciri catches on before Geralt does, though Jaskier has no idea how. "Oh. Oh, gross!"

"My thoughts exactly," Jaskier agrees.

"You're like my uncle or something," Ciri continues, face all scrunched up in a way that makes her look even younger.

"And also at least three times your age," Jaskier adds, trying not to let on how being added to Ciri's little adopted clan of parents and uncles has made him feel all soft and gooey inside. He's never been anyone's uncle before. Had honestly assumed that Ciri only put up with him being around because Geralt and Yen like him. "The man's an idiot. A creepy, weird little idiot."

Geralt's face finally dawns with horrified understanding. "He thought..."

"He asked if I would like the room with a double bed for me and my wife. It was awful," Jaskier admits at last, bolstered by Ciri's response. She's just as disgusted as he is, but she's not moved away or avoided his eye or anything that would indicate that she's uncomfortable around him now.

"Ugh," Ciri says, face still scrunched.

"But she's barely fourteen!" Geralt blurts, face adorably mirroring Ciri's.

"That's what I said!"

They continue to bitch and complain about the whole thing for the rest of the evening and on and off over the next day or so, though not a one of them breathes a word of it to Yen when they see her. Much as he may deserve it, they don't need to add the innkeeper's castration and murder to the list of things people are chasing them for.

3. Geralt

Elves don't view marriage as a contract designed to create ties with other families through shared interests and offspring. Who knew? Instead, they view it as recognition of the love between the people getting married, and a symbol of their committment to share their lives with each other and take care of each other. Crazy stuff.

The result is that elven marriages do not revolve around the expectation of begetting children and, therefore, it isn't uncommon for marriages to take place between men and other men, women and other women, three or more people, or even people who have no intention or inclination towards doing the necessary to beget offspring. It's practically a foreign concept to Jaskier given the understanding of marriage his own upbringing had given him.

It's almost enough to distract him from his own reaction to Filavandrel's assumption.

Almost.

"Um, what?" Jaskier asks dumbly.

Filavandrel's mouth thins with impatience, but he's still a thousand times less scary than his missus. Jaskier can't bring himself to blame her for it entirely given what he knows of her life and her dead daughter. It'd be enough to drive anyone to malicious insanity he thinks, but the fevered glint in her eye when they'd found him had been enough to scare him witless even without the knowledge of her campaign of infanticide.

"Sorry," Jaskier says preemptively. He likes Filavandrel. Or, maybe 'like' is a strong word, given the man's own (also somewhat understandable) trip off the deep end into baby killing. But there's nostalgia there, along with further first hand knowledge of how long and how hard Filavandrel has fought for the bare minimum of safety and respect for his people, only to be beaten down again and again, his people slaughtered in front of him no matter what path he chooses or how hard he tries. He can't help but have sympathy for what he's become, even as he's terrified by it.

"We know you still travel with him," Filavandrel says, "and you know we won't hurt him unless we have to. We only want the girl."

"You and every other fucker on the continent," Jaskier mumbles, sympathy evaporating. "Look, you're not the first to ask, and not the first to leave unsatisfied. Geralt won't let you near Ciri."

"We don't mean her any harm. You, however..." Filavandrel puts on an expression of regret and empathy. Jaskier can't tell if it's fake. "I think the White Wolf will see things our way under the circumstances. We'll keep the girl safe, and he can have his husband back unharmed. A far more pleasant alternative to what will happen if he disagrees."

Jaskier decides not to touch the 'husband' thing for now, it's not like it's likely to be all that persuasive as an argument; 'hey Filavandrel, I'm a far less valuable captive than you, for some unfathomable reason, assumed me to be. Geralt won't think twice before abandoning me in favour of his child.' He can't imagine that information would very good for his health. "You're a father, Filavandrel. You know it doesn't work like that."

"Was. Was a father," Filavandrel spits, a glimmer of his wife's madness showing through his more reasonable facade.

"I don't think it's the kind of thing you ever stop being," Jaskier says gently.

Filavandrel looks away.

"Ciri is, to all intents and purposes, Geralt's child. Do you really think he'll hand her over to you?" Jaskier continues. "The girl has lost enough people, Filavandrel. Merely separating them would be harming her. Let alone using her for whatever it is Francesca has planned."

"You are mistaken if you think Francesca makes these decisions alone."

"She's a child," Jaskier presses. "In a matter of months she watched everyone and everything she knows fall around her. Geralt is the only family she has left, the only sense of safety or love. What you intend to do would destroy her."

"What care I for a human child's emotional wellbeing?" Filavandrel scoffs, but he won't meet Jaskier's eye.

Jaskier swallows, thinking of all of those poor infants, struck down before they had a chance to really live. Their parents, left grieving and wounded with nothing but the promise of vengeance to soothe them. He's been told the screams could be heard for miles around, echoing through the night and all through the following morning, unrelenting and haunting. "She's not. A human child, I mean."

Filavandrel pauses. "We know."

"That's why you want her, isn't it? You know what she is," Jaskier says. He'd assumed as much, though he has no idea how they found out.

"She's our salvation."

"She's my godsdamned step-daughter is what she is!" Jaskier snaps. He has no idea where it's come from. Perhaps it's the fear and dread of what's to come making him rash and desperate, memories of dizzying blows and the snap of fingers haloed in fire sending him back to the same kind of performance that got him out of this kind of mess before. Or perhaps he's sick to his back teeth of hearing people talk about that poor young girl like some kind of tool to power when he's seen her grumpy and childish in the morning, seen trying with all her might to be grown up and sensible and strong as she's faced with things no child should have to face, seen her curse as she tries to pull a comb through her tangled hair in the evening and the way she scowls and flushes when Geralt scolds her for it like the hypocrite he is. She is not a tool, nor a weapon, nor a saviour. She's a little girl being forced to grow up far too quickly by people exactly like Filavandrel.

Some light of recognition sparks in Filavandrel's eyes.

"She may not be human and she may not be my own child, but by your perfectly styled hair, if you try to force her into some sort of martyrdom because of who her great-great-great-fucking grandmother was, I will burn down everything I've spent the last year buildling and raze your precious safe haven to the ground. Do you hear me? There will never be a safe place for you ever again! I swear it." It's a weak threat, one he can't possibly follow through on given the present situation, but he means it. He'll find a fucking way. He has enough contacts, and enough knowledge of who exactly is in Cintra, of who can get in and out of the citadel and how, and of who would very much like to know all of the above information, that all he'd have to figure out is how to stay alive long enough to use it all.

Filavandrel nods like he understands. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry. Of all the humans I've met, I truly believe you don't deserve what's coming to you."

Jaskier tries not to panic as the elf leaves and gestures two others to take his place.

"Sandpiper?"

Jaskier looks up into the disbelieving face of a young elf. A young elf he recognises. He blinks and somehow manages to pluck the name from the dim recesses of his mind. "Dara?"

Dara's a good kid. Sweet, if a little sulky and misguided. And, most importantly, he loves Ciri. Jaskier isn't sure in what way, but it doesn't really matter once the truth of it is out. Jaskier can charm the knickers off a nun. Turning a scared boy being asked to betray a beloved friend to his side is as easy as breathing.

"They're not evil," Dara insists anxiously before they part ways. "They forgave me after I..." He swallows and stares miserably down at his own feet. "They just want to-"

"Protect you all. I know," Jaskier says. "But that isn't all they want. You know that."

Dara looks back up stubbornly. "Why shouldn't we want revenge? After everything humans have done to us!"

Jaskier smiles sadly back at him. "I don't know the answer to that, Dara. All I know is that there are people I love who your noble king and queen mean to kill, and a young girl we both love who they want to use to do it."

Dara's mouth twists. "Tell her I..." He shakes his head. "Don't tell her about me."

Jaskier claps a hand on his shoulder and nods.

Dara disappears back through the trees and Jaskier resists the urge to run down the path back to camp. He has to warn Geralt and Yen so they can get Ciri away from here.

He barely makes it five steps from where Dara left him before being assaulted by an uncharacteristically clingy witch.

"You idiot!" Yen scolds him, mouth right by his ear.

Jaskier winces and slowly extricates himself. He likes hugs. He's a big hugger. But he prefers to keep the hugging and the insults separate, Particularly when the insults are snapped right down his earhole. "Why yes, I am alright, and yes, I'm glad I'm back safe, too."

"You shouldn't have gone wandering off!" Yennefer snaps at him.

"You were the one who told me to go gather firewood!" Jaskier replies indignantly, then sighs at the look in her eyes. "I'm fine, Yen. They didn't hurt me."

She turns away and marches down the path. "I know. We were watching."

"You were wa- How?" Jaskier sputters as he follows her.

Yen doesn't even glance back at him. "Two sorceresses and a witcher. You figure it out."

Jaskier can't. As many of Yen and Ciri's lessens as he's privy to, he'll never understand Chaos or its limitations. "So what? You figured you'd just leave me to figure my own way out of there?"

"You did, didn't you?" Yen says dismissively. She does glance back then. "Besides, we were waiting for Filavandrel to leave. You were the one who wouldn't stay still long enough for a rescue."

"You keep saying 'we'. Were you all there spying on us?" Jaskier asks. "How much did you see?"

Yen slows a little. "Enough to know that you're a complete idiot. A very brave one."

"Well, that all goes without saying."

Yennefer gives him a soft smile. The kind she only ever gives him when they're alone. "Ciri heard what you said. We all did."

Jaskier cringes. "Oh gods."

"It's good for her to hear. It can be hard for her. She's been rejected and betrayed by so many people," Yennefer doesn't mention her own betrayal, but it's there in her voice and in her eyes. "It's good for her to hear someone say that about her when they don't know she's listening, so she can believe it a little."

"Oh."

"Besides, I think Geralt was feeling rather left out being the only one of us no one's mistaken for your spouse," Yennefer teases.

It takes a moment before Jaskier realises. "Who told?"

Yen laughs. "Ciri. Though she made me promise not to go back and murder the creep. You all rather overestimate my abilities sometimes, you know? How the hell would I even know which inn to go to?"

Jaskier narrows his eyes at her. "I'm sure you'd figure it out if you really wanted to."

She rolls her eyes.

They keep walking to whatever meeting spot she'd agreed with the others.

"You know, according to old elven laws, the only thing necessary for a marriage to be legitimate is for the couple to announce it to an elder and for them not to dispute it," she continues when they near the others. Jaskier can hear them through the trees and see pale flashes of their hair. "I think Filavandrel may have actually just married you."

Jaskier rolls his eyes. "Ha ha, laugh it up. Why am I the one everyone assumes is married to one of you, anyway?"

"Oh, he's just my step-father," Ciri says offhandedly to the merchant she's buying sweets from, nearly giving Jaskier a heart attack in the process.

He tries his best to give a winning smile in answer to the merchant's questioning look. He knows that despite the reality of his years, he looks a little young to have a child Ciri's age. But she did say step-father, and he looks more than old enough to be a trophy husband.

Ciri chats awhile with the merchant, aimiably discussing her favourite treats and how they're made. Jaskier has no idea where she gets it from, knowing both her family of origin and her current family, but she can be very inquisitive and friendly when she's in a good mood. If Jaskier had had a student at Oxenfurt with nearly as much eagerness to learn literally whatever anyone was willing to teach them, he'd have cried tears of rapture and considered never leaving campus again.

As it is, that inquisitive girl has just called him her step-father as if the words came naturally, and he isn't quite sure what to do with that.

Eventually, the merchant has other customers to see to and Ciri only a little reluctantly takes her leave, dragging Jaskier to the next stall, and then the next, until it's almost supper time and they have to head back to the inn.

Ciri insists on going back to the sweet seller's stall the next day before they leave town, wanting Geralt to try her favourite candied nuts. Geralt, as always, grumbles about having to stay later than planned, but they all know him too well to pay him any mind. He loves sweets, as any child who was utterly deprived of them tends to when they get old enough to buy their own.

Jaskier slings an arm around his shoulder when the grumbling reaches its peak and laughs at the disgruntled glare he gets in return. "Who do you think you're fooling? You'd let that girl spend another full day dragging us all around the market if that's what she wanted. And we all know you've got money for hard toffees already counted out in your pocket."

Geralt shrugs him off and goes to join Ciri at the stall while Jaskier and Yen grin at his retreating back.

"He's such a grumpy old man sometimes," Jaskier says affectionately.

"Well, he is over eighty," Yen replies.

"Hmm. You know, he's never actually told me how old he is?" Jaskier says. "There've been hints here and there, but no definites."

Yen shrugs. "I suppose you start to lose track eventually."

Jaskier gives her a look. "Maybe you eternally young and beautiful types do, but I'm pretty sure I'll still know how old I am when I'm in my eighties."

"I suppose you'd know. You can't be that far off, now."

"Oi!" Jaskier says loudly. "I'll have you know I'm in the prime of my life!"

Yen grins at him and pokes at his face. "It's wonderful that you have such a great outlook on it. You know what they say, it's important to stay youthful in your mind, no matter how ancient your bones get. And you've certainly got that down pat. Sometimes I forget which one is the child, you or Ciri."

Jaskier sputters at her dramatically.

Ciri and Geralt return before he's managed to form a suitably scathing retort, and the smug look on Geralt's face distracts him entirely from the endeavour.

Geralt holds out a small bag to Jaskier. "The merchant insisted I pass this along to my charming husband."

Jaskier doesn't miss the gloating look he aims at Yennefer. "...Right."

"Charming? Clearly she was referring to someone else," Yennefer says loftily.

"She wasn't," Ciri says, barely paying attention as she digs into her sweets. "She met Jaskier yesterday and she saw him hugging Geralt a minute ago."

"Hugging?" Jaskier asks. "The woman has a very loose definition of hugging, but I suppose I can see where she may have got that idea."

"Well, Geralt can't have you. You already have a spouse, remember?" Yennefer says, wrapping herself around his arm and batting her eyelashes at Geralt provokingly.

"I'm afraid Geralt's the one I actually married, according to old elven laws," Jaskier joins in gamely, "but from what I understand of elven marriages, you can always share. There's plenty of me to go around."

"Half the continent can attest to how much you get around, bard, but that's hardly the point," Yennefer says, amping up her clinginess as Geralt scowls at her. "Besides, you're human, not elf. If we have a proper handfasting surely that would take precedence?"

"Why Yennefer, are you proposing to me?" Jaskier asks.

"He already married me. Get over it, Yen," Geralt says with a slight smirk.

"Everyone please! Not in front of Ciri. It's not good for her to see us fight," Jaskier says.

"He could always handfast both of you," Ciri suggests with an overabundance of wide eyed innocence. "He does have two hands."

"Excellent idea, Ciri!" Jaskier exclaims.

Geralt and Yennefer have a glaring stand off that's somewhat ruined by both of their twitching lips. It goes on long enough Jaskier starts to suspect Yennefer of using her mind reading tricks to keep the fake argument going in their heads.

Yennefer sighs and backs down at last. "Fine. But we'd better get it over with before I change my mind."

"Fantastic!" Jaskier says, then catches up with himself as he finds himself being walked further into town rather than out of it. "Wait, where are we going?"

"You're not chickening out already, are you?" Yennefer asks. "It's a little quick for even you to be getting cold feet." She's still teasing but there's a look in her eyes, one that's also in Geralt's when he glances to his other side, like a question. Are we all on the same page here?

It occurs to him then, that maybe he's missed a few things. Somewhere along the line, Yennefer's jokes had evidently become flirting without him thinking to take it seriously, and as some unknown point, Geralt had tossed his own cap in the ring. Jaskier can be an idiot in a lot of ways, and he has no idea how they ended up here, but he's not about to ruin it all by admitting that. Sure, it's a bit of a whirlwind romance from his perspective, but surely they've known each other long enought that it counts for something?

"Not at all, I just wasn't expecting you to want to do this now," Jaskier says easily.

"There's a temple of Melitele on the other side of town," Geralt says. "There won't be another one bigger than a shed for most of our way back to Kaedwen."

Jaskier swallows. "You've been talking about this."

Geralt and Yen exchange glances and Yen shrugs. "We figured after your declaration to Filavandrel, we may as well make it official. If you'd rather wait, though-"

"No!" Jaskier blurts. He's half sure he's delusional or something, and he'd rather see this little fantasy through before the vision dissipates and he loses his chance. "No. We can... We can get married here. Fuck."

"Jaskier?" Geralt asks, a tinge of concern in his voice.

He pats Geralt's arm reassuringly. "So. How is this whole... marriage thing going to work?"

"You marry me and Geralt, we continue on as we are," Yennefer says, then pauses as though losing her nerve. Though Yennefer never loses her nerve, so that can't possibly be what's happening here. She clears her throat and her grip tightens on his arm. "And if you'd like, we can explore other... dimensions of our relationship. If you only want to be Ciri's step-father in a slightly more official capacity, and to be more firmly tied into this family, then..."

Jaskier waits for her to continue, but she seems to run out of words, tilting her chin up challengingly until Geralt takes over.

"Then that is all it will be."

Jaskier stares at Geralt so long that he trips over a pothole as they walk. "And if I'm amenable to a little dimensional exploration?"

"We'd welcome it," Geralt says warmly. Then looks sharply ahead. "With either of us."

"Or both," Yen adds.

Jaskier blinks rapidly and shakes his head. If he had a drink in his hand he'd be eyeing it suspiciously. "And the both of you? Does this mean you're all patched up again?"

Geralt winces.

"Not quite," Yennefer says softly, hurt but in the way of something that's still healing. "This would be each of us with you separately."

Geralt grunts awkwardly. "For now."

She smiles tentatively. "For now."

"Besides," Ciri interjects, "they're kind of already married, aren't they? Like how Geralt's destiny and mine are linked so he's sort of my father even though he never adopted me officially." There's a weight to her final sentence, and she watches the clouds pass overhead a little too intently to be truly nonchalant.

Jaskier narrows his eyes. "Are you hinting at something there, Cirilla?"

"What?" She gives him the wide eyed innocent look again.

Jaskier sighs. "They officiate adoptions at temples of Melitele as well, don't they?"

"Yes, they do," Ciri says a little too quickly.

"And they are sworn to secrecy, so using our real names shouldn't be an issue," Jaskier ponders.

Geralt frowns. "That is why we chose a temple of Melitle for the handfasting."

Yennefer is quicker on the uptake. "How many people can adopt the same child?"

"I'm not sure if there's a limit," Jaskier tells her. It's not something he's ever had cause to know. "We can always ask."

"Ciri, who is it that you want to adopt you?" Geralt asks. It seems he did put the pieces together, but was just unsure of where the final one fit.

Ciri shrugs. "Seems like every grown up I meet tries to. Three seems a conservative number, considering."

Jaskier laughs. "She has a point. I think that merchant back there was only one more dimpled smile away from offering."

Ciri grins at him, flashing said dimple in the process.

And okay, so he's kind of gone on them all, each in their own different ways, and okay, so he hadn't quite realised that about Yen and had been somewhat actively resisting the knowledge of his newfound parental affections for Ciri, but it really isn't so scary. After all, he was always planning on being with them for as long as they'd allow. He'd just assumed it was because he saw them as part and parcel with Geralt, much as he liked them both. Cared for them both. Had apparently fallen head over heels for them both without noticing and somehow all but adopted Ciri in the process.

Well, no harm done. He gets it now.

#fanfic #geraskier #yennskier #implied geraskefer

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