#political onions

[ered]

in case you've missed it, and I'm assuming most of you have, we're having a presidential election here in Finland. First round is currently going on, so I thought I'd give you a quick run down of our candidates!

(in alphabetical order, party in parentheses)

Mika Aaltola (independent): Has mainly worked in academia and apparently has experience in international politics, which is good for the job. I honestly know next to nothing about this dude, but he seems to positively radiate Just Some Guy energy. What would be interesting about him winning: I have no idea. Chances of winning: Ehhh - but it wouldn't be the first time we get a president from outside the daily politics.

Li Andersson (Left Alliance): current leader of the Left Alliance, former Minister of Education. What most people seem to say about her: "she's clearly the best choice, but has no chance of winning so I won't be voting for her." What would be interesting about her winning: first Left Alliance president Chances of winning: Unfortunately slim. Left Alliance is a small party and half of the country still seems to think they're Evil Communists.

Sari Essayah (Christian Democrats): she's also the leader of her party. Most known for being a former racewalker and religious. What would be interesting about her winning: How the hell did it happen??? Chances of winning: zero.

Pekka Haavisto (Green League): Former Minister of the Environment, International Development, and Foreign Affairs (three different terms, not all at once). He was born in 1958 and hasn't done much beyond politics. He's been in the presidential race twice already too, both times losing to our current president, Sauli Niinistö. What would be interesting about him winning: first gay president. Chances of winning: he made it to the final round twice already, so maybe third time's a charm? He has been polling first this time around.

Jussi Halla-aho (Finns Party): a prominent rightwing blogger, a Slavic linguist by education, and the current Speaker of the Parliament. He's "immigration critical" in the same vein "gender criticals" tend to be. He's is considered something of an intellectual in the rightwing circles despite having the vibes of an anthropomorphic raisin, and has amassed a cult following - who literally call him Mestari (master, but in Finnish the vibes are more a master of a trade and not some dude who spanks you in the bedroom. What would be interesting about him winning: finding out if I can immigrate to Denmark. Chances of winning: none if I can help it, but like I said, he does have a very solid fanbase.

Hjallis Harkimo (Movement Now): best known for being the owner of an ice-hockey team or something. His real name is Harry and for some reason he has been elected into the parliament twice. I assume it's the famous allure of a "successful businessman" or because he's something of a celebrity? Who knows. What would be interesting about him winning: How did it happen? Chances of winning: slim.

Olli Rehn (Centre Party): Served as the Minister of Economic Affairs for like a year under our most fuck-witted prime minister in recent history. Not much else to say about it. Somehow seems older than Pekka Haavisto tho he's actually younger. What would be interesting about him winning: absolutely nothing. He's so dull it's almost offensive. Chances of winning: who knows? Maybe he'll be a dark horse if all other candidates fall flat.

Alexander Stubb (National Coalition Party): Former Prime Minister, and former Minister of Finance. He's ehhhhhh not the worst possible option, honestly, and is on the more liberal side of the Rich Getting Richer party. What would be interesting about him winning: how will he be different from our current (National Coalition Party) president, I guess Chances of winning: last I checked, he was polling second, so I guess it's a possibility?

Jutta Urpilainen (Social Democratic Party): Former Minister of Finance. Social Democrats are one of the biggest parties we have, but they took a while deciding on who to pick. She's alright. Social Democrats are usually fine, and she'a long term Social Democrat. What would be interesting about her winning: uhh... possibly the first president to have released a Christmas album? Chances of winning: I just don't think she's that popular, to be honest. But she might make it into top three at least, like I said, it's one of the biggest parties behind her.

#finnish presidential elections #long post #political opinions #political onions #i wrote this and did not take my evening meds on time so if i don't sleep tonight this is why

[killlerfang1]

The Onion is out for BLOOD

#GET THEIR ASSES #Palestine #Gaza #us politics #free palestine #My post #Israel #Satire #unreality #the onion

[mysharona1987]

The Onion really ain’t fucking around.

#atlanta #news #blm #black lives matter #georgia #gop #politics #defund the cops #the onion #humor

[politijohn]

Source

Screaming. The Onion did it again…

#Kissinger #war criminal #politics #us politics #government #war crimes #end all wars #news #current events #satire #the onion

[animentality]

#twitter #palestine #israel #us politics #the onion

[kimbureh]

listen, if you believe Glass Onion's message of bashing super rich people is a form of "self"-critique, then you clearly don't understand who the 1% are.

When Rian Johnson calls out fake Elon Musk in his fun detective movie, this is not an attempt at "self-deprecating humor". Rian Johnson is "I own nice houses"-rich, he is not "I control nations, wars, economies, and the livelihoods of millions"-rich like Elon Musk is.

Rian Johnson is closer in his wealth to you than he is to Elon Musk, by far.

I am all for holding rich people accountable, I support calling out the Hollywood industry. But we *need* to learn to tell billionaires and millionaires apart, or our criticism of the political system will be fraught.

#glass onion #the glass onion #knives out #politics

[eggsaladstain]

i’ve never been sadder that the onion isn’t real

#the onion #ron desantis #disney #florida #us politics #satire #goofy #disney vs desantis

[prole-log]

#the onion #anarchism #politics #freeblr #nature

[wherestoriescomefrom]

rian johnson took all that time, put in all that effort to make glass onion a fantastic period piece to the first four months of pandemic, a prescient narrative that anticipates the stupidity of rich billionaires, and then pulled the rug from under us because the world of benoit blanc just straight up doesn't have the mona lisa anymore

#Some geniuses in the notes are talking about how it wasn't the real mona lisa #And I'm editing my tags because tumblr is a website with minimal reading comprehension #But the POINT is that he went through all that effort to make the world canon complaint with ours #Only to DESTROY a cultural artefact real or not #Having massive political implications for the world #And that's what I was pointing out. Here and in another reblog that presumably no one will care to fish out #It's in the replies for those looking #Anyway I hope rian johnson makes ten of these without the mona lisa #Also as a side note. So many movies have ignored covid #Not this man. He's like no we'll include it. But if we divert from canon reality #We're going to destroy the mona lisa #Love that for him. Icon #hello void this is ridiculosity #knives out #glass onion

[lunarharp]

more whatober & things. what i think their fav ghiblis are

#witch hat tag #orufrey #prompts: 'apprentice' 'stylish' and 'reach' #oru likes 'the political ones' let's just pretend he doesn't like howl for the qifrey narrative. agott likes The Burnout Narrative one. etc #i went to an illustration class the other day (first time i've done smth like that) and drew a green onion for like an hour. On the mind #i've drawn oru in that black dress like 5 times now. staple of his wardrobe. to me. #the 'reach' one is qifrey being saved in a dream. did you watch ofmd

[ivygorgon]

WHO KNOCKED OVER MY Capitol insurrection arrests per million people by state *Grabs Montana* YOU

💘 Q'u lach' shughu deshni da. 🏹 "What I say is true" in Dena'ina Qenaga

#wyoming #just south of 'em; it's the complete #opposite #Spouse says it is the #lesbian #state #(Why are women from this country so hot?) #says all the men who “ruined them” moved to #montana #ivy speaks #uhaul capital #western #us politics #who knocked over my onions #YOU #meme #political meme #political memes #us capitol #insurrection #arrested #data #datablr #data is beautiful #politics #jan 6 #trumplicans #intersectional social justice #intersectional feminism #trans rights

[corporationsarepeople]

This fucking guy.

Because they ARE, you bought & paid for talking chunk of wood. If we allow intolerance to be tolerated, then intolerance will come to dominate. And I think Alito knows this.

(Tolerance, btw, is the absolute minimum. It is grudging acceptance. If you can’t even do that, then go back to your cave. This asshole’s religion tells him to love, not just tolerate. It’s not hard to do.)

#us politics #samuel alito #not the onion #popper’s paradox

[mysharona1987]

#The onion #free palestine #News #gaza #democrats #republicans #politics #idf #israel #war #usa

[politijohn]

Source

Source

New York Times headline today vs.

The Onion’s headline from Nov.

#satire #politics #us politics #government #the left #the onion #mass news media #Gaza #Palestine #free Palestine #Israel #war #end all wars #current events #news

[animentality]

#twitter #the onion #healthcare #america #us politics

[bravecrab]

SPOILERS FOR GLASS ONION

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I want to talk about how Glass Onion is such an excellent critique of the rich, specifically the kind who live by the mantra, Move Fast and Break Things.

In Glass Onion they call themselves Disruptors, a specific belief that they are an intelligencia who can see beyond rules and morals, and are willing to break those rules and morals to provide advancements the world needs but can't be provided by anyone without their smarts and bravery.

Except for they don't disrupt The System, they perpetuate it by being rich, selfish individuals who get rich off of exploitation. The Elon Musk equivalent, Miles, is a spoiled idiot who forces his staff to pursue his ridiculous ideas and dismisses their many concerns regarding safety or feasibility.

Duke, who represents the grifters of the manosphere, particularly Joe Rogan and Alex Jones, hawks misogyny and dietary supplements to gamers.

Birdie Jay, the influencer type (perhaps a cross between a Kardashian and Goopy Paltrow) is selling lifestyle products made with sweatshop labour (although her character's reason for using it is that she's a massive idiot).

I don't think Claire (the politician) or Lionel (the scientist) are reflections of anyone specific in the political or scientific fields, but are general examples of those who would enable the likes of Elon or Bezos, to be in proximity to their wealth and power for their own gain. Same with Whiskey and Peg, although they suck up to Duke and Birdie to benefit from their wealth and power.

Lastly we have Andi, and she is the one I am least sure of. She's an ideas person, she's got the smarts to stand up against Miles when he pursues an incredibly dangerous and unethical project. She's definitely an aspiring capitalist, but I feel like she's someone who would like to be The Ethical Billionaire but when the reality of the exploitation that being a billionaire requires becomes apparent, the dream falls apart.

These Disruptors perpetuate harmful exploitative systems by sticking together and enabling each other. We all hope that Musk will be destroyed by being a mask-off idiot by mishandling Twitter, but it isn't getting the Mona Lisa destroyed that ends Miles. It's the abandonment by his sycophants.

We will have to suffer fools like Musk and Trump as they break laws and exploit their wealth because of systems of sycophancy, like an ineffectual justice systems and bottom-feeding politicians. The dismantling of those systems is pivotal in being free from the corruption of the 1%.

What a good movie.

#spoilers #glass onion #knives out #billionaires #eat the rich #corruption #politics #power #exploitation #elon musk #joe rogan #mine