#the joys of romance options for asexual people

[acenixx]

Saw an argument on reddit about how people have played witcher 3 5+ times and always choose Yen or Triss and their reasonings and I just realised I've played this game every single year since it came out and my asexual ass has always chosen Ciri lmao. My Geralt is just a good dad 🤗

#the joys of romance options for asexual people #asexual #witcher #the witcher #witcher 3 #geralt is a good dad and grumpy monster killer and thats all im so sorry

[toastchild]

OK, I'm not sure if I can phrase everything I want to say correctly, but I'll try anyway: YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!

Like, really!

Your art is just GORGEOUS, both old and new! And I love love LOVE that you included a bisexual trans male character! (SERIOUSLY, AS A BISEXUAL TRANS GUY MYSELF IT MEANS A LOT TO ME!) I just love Tristan so much, and (what seems to be) his li'l crush on Gabe is just adorable!

Although, to be honest, as much as I love those two (being laid-back and "looking for a dream boy" are two things I can heavily relate to), in terms of personality so far my favorite is perhaps Alizée, and design-wise it would be Noah. Like seriously, when it comes to Noah I can't decide if I just want to look like them or date them??? *fanboy scream* THEY'RE TOO COOL!!! (>////<)

Regardless, I just adore your comic, and everything about it. Everything looks great, everyone is adorable, the diversity is just AWESOME! Bianca and Penny's interactions are just so awkward, funny, cute, and relatable! I just love it! Thank you for bringing a little joy into my life as a non-straight, non-cis person looking for "rainbow" content.

Compliments aside, though, there's something I want to say. I just recently noticed you changed how you identify as, and I have to ask - how did you realize you were aro AND ace? If I remember correctly, you used to identify as aromantic and lesbian (sorry if that's not true, btw). Was it a case of you realizing you only liked girls in the aesthetic sense in spite of being open to intimacy and/or a relationship with them?

Sorry for the weird questions by the way, you don't have to answer them if you don't feel like it. I don't mean to be invasive, I'm just genuinely curious about such things, considering I am neither asexual nor aromantic exactly, and I have never felt any true semblance of being a lesbian (since I'm a trans boy who likes more than one gender, I could not feel any connection to the word "lesbian" when I learned about it even though I'm really into ladies).

If it somehow alleviates whatever discomfort I might have brought to you by bringing up a (possibly) unpleasant subject amidst such praise, I'd like for you to know that I have kind of aromantic/asexual -ish values myself. That is, in spite being a huge fan of romance and, er, "bedroom bonding," I think platonic love should always come first, and I always feel aces, aros, demis, and everyone in the ace/aro spectrum deserve better both in real life AND in fiction.

Anyway, I'm glad your art, comics, and characters exist, they're a treat to the eyes and a warm embrace for the soul, especially for LGBT+ people. I hope you continue to bring smiles to peoples' faces by being your lovely self, and I hope you always find people who do the same for you.

You are a rare jewel, and I wish you good luck on your journey as an artist, as a person, and as a human being.

(P.S. I just realized i made this message WAY too long than I had originally planned. I really went overboard with this one. Oh well... *shyly walks away*)

DUDE!!! I can't thank you enough for such an absolute essay I'm seriously so grateful for the time it must have taken to write this!! All your thoughts about my characters make me so so happy aaa I can't believe it <333

You're right, I used to identify as aromantic and lesbian and I still think women are very lovely! You're spot on, I'm definitely more into girls in an aesthetic sense I think they're funky and cool but god I would never want to date anyone.

I actually realized I am definitely asexual recently - basically w/o getting too explicit someone offered me the option to try "it" and it freaked me out so much it kind of set off an "ohhhh okay, I'm definitely not a sexual person" moment. Honestly, I kind of grew up being told I was too young to identify as asexual and to just wait until I'm older, but bro I'm older now and I still feel the same way so 🤠🤸‍♀️ Honestly I think my thoughts are if a label is resounding w you - give it a try, nothing has to be permanent! You're allowed to change your mind, there are no rules.

Anyway!! I just wanted to thank you again for writing to me and making my day, I hope you're absolutely thriving <333333

#long post #toastchild asks #<33333333 #ily!!!!

[theheraldsrest]

“Romanced Companions reacting to asexual Inquisitor”

Ayyy! Asexual bros! Cabot, this one’s for you! *distant sound of Cabot saying No* Nevermind, it’s for me! I hope I don’t butcher this! I gotchu, boo! 

-Lord Lex

Cullen

-It may come as a small shock to him, but gets over it fairly quickly. He already knows he loves you and that you love him, why would that change? Honestly does freak out a bit over certain moves he makes like putting his hand on your waist. Ask constantly if it’s appropriate or if he’s overstepping. Just wants to make sure you’re not uncomfortable and that he’s doing this right. Sometimes respects your space too much that it looks like he’s trying to hold up to the COVID “6ft apart” rule. (Cullen: What’s a koved?)

Josephine

-She’s well versed with the different sexualities people choose so she’s familiar. She was a bard for the courts and had to know who she was talking to for Andraste’s sake. That doesn’t stop her from enjoying her time with you either way. Mostly the same as pursuing her romance, the only difference is she just enjoys cuddling you and being near you. She tries to do so many small things to show her love instead with little gifts, reading with you, or even just walking around, hand in hand.

Solas

-Completely understands this and, in a way, feels the same. Being with the person you love and respecting who they are is more important, only ever seeing the more intimate things as being a continuation of one’s blood line or even just a primal thing. Only things he does differently are the delicate kisses he’ll place on your forehead, cheek, or to your lips. You’ll find no complaints from him as he just enjoys your company and you wanting to be with him. Grows even more attached to a point that he almost gives up on going through with a certain idea.

Cassandra

-A bit confused, but she’s got the spirit. Thought it would lessen the embarrassment but, oh ho ho! She couldn’t be more wrong. This just means the romantic antics are increased tenfold and it takes her a bit to catch up and try to reciprocate. She’s more of a blushing mess, to which Varric definitely doesn’t forget to point out. Didn’t really see the necessity with stating that you were asexual but it does increase her protection of you from some degenarates. Loves that your more private time together is spent being near each other, either reading or just talking.

The Iron Bull

-Fine by him. He understands, some people just don’t have that drive for sexual pleasure or just no interest at all. Hell, he does it for fun or to unwind. Everything is pretty much the same just with less sexual tension. You couldn’t believe it, but he was a little embarrassed after he pinned you to the wall and went through his whole “you want to ride the bull” spiel, only for you to tell him that you didn’t want to “ride” but rather enjoy his company further. Time with him just seems much more...calmer and sweeter.

Dorian

-With most of the relationships he’s been in, this comes off as a surprise for him. Didn’t even know it was an option, especially knowing you were interested in him. But not for sexual pleasure? He’s baffled but overtime kinda enjoys it, even brings some joy to him. You don’t want him for his body or because he’s “also into men,” but because you like him for him. He does try to stop himself from seeming to be inappropriate, such as touching your thigh or running hand down your waist, but you know it’s just him reminding himself you’re real.

Sera

-What in the goddamn-? Kidding. Seriously though, there’s more schtick to sexuality? Argh. At least she tries to wrap her head around it. “So you like me? And like kissing me? But still don’t want sex? You feel nothing towards it? What are you, a saint?” Doesn’t seem like it but she does take it a bit seriously, watching what comments she makes about you or stopping herself from going too far. It’s a bit scary to see until she pulls another prank and you know it’s still your Sera. God help the poor soul who makes an inappropriate comment about you.

Blackwall

-He’s ok with that. Since becoming “Blackwall,” he stopped having a lot of nights with women in his bed, repressing any urges he might have. He’s not that informed about asexuality (most sexualities for that matter, no one is. And if you say you are educated in all sexualities, then you’re lying to yourself) but he respects that. There’s so many other ways he can show he cares, beginning with spending more time with you and placing fuzzy kisses to your cheek. He tries to not overstep any boundaries you might have. Chivalry isn’t dead, you know?

(God I regret everything she says. Please forgive them, I can’t even explain them. -Cabot)

#dai #dragon age inquisition #inquisitor #cullen rutherford #commander cullen #josephine montilyet #Josephine #solas #fenharel #cassandra pentaghast #cassandra #the iron bull #iron bull #dorian pavus #dorian #sera #dai sera #blackwall #thom rainier

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

I've only recently considered myself asexual/aromantic and I can't tell if I'm upset that I’ll never have what has been shoved down my throat all my life or if I'm upset because I don't want to be this? I've been questioning myself for a while now and I'm wondering if other people feel this way? Like is it normal to identify as this and still be a little upset that I'll be missing out on what is expected of me?

Yeah you're feelings are very normal, Anon. And it's not uncommon for people who've recently figured out they're ace/aro to have feelings like this.

Honestly it's a lot to work through, and it takes time to process. There are some things that can help, a big one can be seeing what other aces/aros are saying and doing. So following them on social media, maybe joining a discord or following a forum like Arocalypse. There may also be some relevant Carnival of Aces/Carnival of Aros subjects (a monthly blogging event where aces or aros write a blog post according to a theme).

Seeking out ace/aro media is great. There's more all the time, especially books and podcasts and you can look up lists pretty easily. If you want recs I've really liked the Jughead 2015 run from Archie comics and Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger, which is a YA book. Both characters are asexual with a strong disinterest in romance.

Another bit of advice I like to give is that at the beginning it may feel like you're having a door closed, but I like to seeing of ace and aro labels as an invitation to figure out your own path and what would truly work best for you. Society is very rigid and preaches one way to live your life to find fulfillment, but there's really very many different paths to take. And maybe some aces and aros may still want some of those things, like maybe children or a life partner or something like that, but it's optional. And you get to choose what makes sense for you and what are you actually going to enjoy and find fulfillment in vs what would feel more like an obligation to you. And are there possibly unrelated things you may find joy or fulfillment in. It may take some time, but you will figure out what makes sense for you.

And it takes time, there's not some switch you can flip and suddenly be accepting of your identity. But slowly you can work your way there. Be patient with yourself though, and understand you're going to feel how you're going to feel and there's nothing wrong with that.

All the best, Anon! And good luck.

[sophieakatz]

Thursday Thoughts: Ace Week 2020

Where were you ten years ago in your journey to accept your ace identity? If you could send a message to yourself from ten years ago, what would you tell yourself?

­-

Dear Sophie of 2010,

You are fifteen years old, and you don’t know it yet, but you’re ace.

“Ace” isn’t a word you’d use to describe yourself. When you hear that word, you think of playing cards or fighter pilots, and you are neither of those things. You’re a high school sophomore, so you’ve probably heard the term “asexual” while learning about plants in a science class. At this point, you don’t know that it’s a word that can describe people. You don’t know that not feeling sexual attraction is even an option.

You do know that you don’t want sex. You don’t even really get the appeal of romance. You think that everyone would have much fewer problems if they didn’t care about dating and if they weren’t so dramatic about their crushes. You made up a crush to get the girls in your class to stop asking you who you liked. You think that you hate YA novels because they’re always about people pining over and/or cheating on each other. You’d much rather read and write fantasy. You’d much rather imagine the princess saving herself from the tower and becoming best friends with the dragon.

Around now, you’re about to start wondering whether something is wrong with you.

You already know that other people experience the world in fundamentally different ways than you do. You don’t have a sense of smell, and you’re always the first Jew that the kids in your class ever met. In junior high, you thought that the girls around you were exaggerating how much they liked celebrities and other strangers. But now, you’re in high school, and your buddies keep pointing out how “innocent” you are, because you’ve never dated anyone and you don’t know what an orgasm is, and you’re starting to take their opinions seriously.

I wish I could cut off your train of thought right there. I wish I could tell you that you’re not broken. You’re not even unique. You are not alone in your experience. That’s what you need to know, when you are fifteen and you keep losing friends because they want to spend more time with their crushes than you; when you are fifteen and your best friend wants to date you, but you don’t want to date him, and you don’t know why; when you are fifteen and you think you might have a crush on a girl, and when you tell your mom, she hugs you and says she’ll love you no matter what, but that doesn’t change the fact that once again there’s something that makes you different; when you are fifteen and you are safe, and warm, and loved, but you are not happy.

You will realize this in hindsight and feel guilty about it, because there has always been so much happiness in your life, so much comfort and encouragement and joy. But speaking now, after having experienced much happier years, I look back on my fifteen-year-old self and I see that you are not happy. You are not happy because you think that you are alone in your experience, because you have no friends like you, because there are no books or movies about people like you, because there is no word for people like you, because people like you don’t exist.

There are YA novels I wish I could reach back through time and give to you. There are YouTube links and podcasts and tweets I want to send your way. I long to take that Tumblr post with the word “demisexual” in it and paste it in front of your eyes, three years before you will find it. I want to tell you that you will find yourself reflected on a wiki page. I want to tell you, you who love words, that there is a word for you, that there are seven and a half million people like you, and that you will meet them in real life.

For now, you are fifteen years old, and your father will hold you while you cry, and you will tell him that you feel like a background character in someone else’s story. I assure you, as he did, that this is your story, and that your story is worth telling. That’s what I wish I could tell you, fifteen-year-old Sophie: you are full of stories worth telling, and your stories – your ace stories – will resonate with so many people.

I love you.

Yours,

Sophie of 2020

@asexualawarenessweek

#asexual #asexuality #demisexual #demisexuality #aceweek #ace week #asexual awareness week #ace #demi #aspec #acespec #aphobia #internalized aphobia #coming out #ace week 2020 #thursday thoughts

[mothschan]

@thesuspiciousorange I accidentally delete your ask! _(:3 」∠)_

豚! I remember what was!

N Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice)

1. I wanting more 炎炎ノ消防隊 and ドロヘドロ content. They both amazing and I am wishing people appreciated more.

2. Want more asexual Shouta and Hizashi. I am asexual and I would like to be seeing character I am liking in way I can be relating to them. I like nsfw thing but tbh I want platonic romance explore more. I am married transgender man and we are in asexual marriage so, it possible. We are loving each other very much. I want to be seeing people explore meaning of love outside sexual attract.

3. I wanting people stop harass each other. This it is just every fandom. I am seeing a lot discourse and I am no understanding how you can be trying to make other people feel bad for enjoy thing that is no harming people. Would like to be seeing people in fandom thinking and using more empathy. Understanding that people on computer is real and no just robot. And that character on screen is no a real person, and harming real one over them is harmful way of thinking. Things we are all saying have consequences.

O Choose a song at random, which ship or character does it remind you of

No laugh but. It remind me of Guts From Berserk before Griffith.... well. He was so in love Griffith pride and strength. Griffith who is first person ever see him as beautiful and strong and worth something. First person ever to have trust in him. He see him and want to be worthy of him faith in him and trust. He leave to try to find him own way and way to be strong and prideful in way that Griffith is. To come back and be worthy of it. So he leave to be finding him own dreams even if he was no knowing where this was or how to be starting. He just know the first step is to be leaving. And when he come back, he find it a nightmare.

Y What are your secondhand fandoms (fandoms you aren’t in personally but are tangentially familiar with because your friends/people on your dash are in them)

Oooo, ok so... I am very much easy influence. So my friends they are having a fandom and almost always I get into. Because my friends I want to be experiencing with them and feeling joy they are feeling through thing they love.

I getting into Stephen Universe, Kipo, Hilda, Genshin Impact, AtLA, Good Omens, and adventure time this way. It is same with ship.

Maybe I do no like as much but I have participated in for my friends. Like @theandromedarecord BakuIida brain rot. Who also make amazing art and people should be checking out. <3

Z Just ramble about something fan-related, go go go (prompts optional but encouraged)

In my erasercloudmic timeline Yamada he is silent supporter. He is loud, sing English music when he cooking and shaving. He is last one to be accepting parenthood but he is best of them all. He always is teaching them things slow and with patience. Aizawa he may be emotional parent love them strong and passion hold them when they are crying, but yamada he is one who teaching them (Tenko, Hitoshi, Eri) how to be tie shoes and pay attention for walk signal when going to school. He braid eri hair, and then tenko when he is asking. He help eri first time she is having girl experience and tenko he take him to it him first dress. He is parent who tell Hitoshi that people make fun of him are wrong and that he is destiny for great things. He break a teacher face for forcing Tenko to wear pants and confinscate him girl uniform.

He is one there when Aizawa have bad dream from him job as Social worker and he is one keeping oboro from making bad impulse choice. He manage house finance. He take eri to work with him at radio station a lot. She is him best guest star. More than anything he love be a father and he is best of three at it, but he is last one to trust Tenko. He is last one accept that he is parent. But when he is, it hit him like brick in face.

#aizawa shouta #bnha fanart #yamada hizashi #erasermic #shigaraki tomura #ren asks #ren’s friends #bnha headcanons #erasercloudmic #erasercloud #cloudmic #shirakumo oboro #eri bnha #shinsou hitoshi #shimura tenko

[project-ohagi]

Dabi x Reader

Buy me a coffee!! <3

Greyromantic: Can experience romantic attraction, but weakly or infrequently; feeling alienated from romance; only feeling attraction in specific circumstances.

Asexual: Having little/no sexual attraction or interest in sexual activities.

Questioning: Process of exploration regarding gender, sexual orientation, sexual identity.

----

The phenomenon of love is a complex, chemical concoction that has long been weaved into the fabric of our society. It is presented as a requirement, with those who find the concept either too challenging to thoroughly comprehend, or lacking in appeal, branded as anomalies. In its pursuit of normality, it quickly alienated those whose hearts just couldn't conform. In a different society, one not quite so dominated by this 'normality' of romantic and sexual interests...you might be forgiven for your limited knowledge. But this one...it seems to blanch at the very idea that happiness can be attained in the absence of romantic attraction.

As such, those identifying along the Aromantic or Asexual spectrums are often overlooked - even shunned. But, the greatest truth of it all is a lot simpler than you may expect: an emotion as profound as joy cannot be induced solely by succumbing to carnal desires, or tasting the lips of another. No...it is through self-acceptance, and the acceptance from those for whom your heart beats - parents, siblings, friends...and perhaps in this manner, the meaning is amplified.

But...what happens when you are forced into complacency, into setting aside your own interests, to 'further evolution', or to 'finally be normal'?

You were still trying to figure this out.

Who were you...really? Why couldn't you summon an emotion as free and universal as love?...Romantic love? Why did it seem so incomprehensible, so...intangible? These were the thoughts you battled with, every waking moment. They burrowed deep into your mind, so that you could never pull them out. They were elusive, yet...constant, nagging.

Why am I so different? Everyone else has crushes...even Toga likes that one UA boy! Ah, yeah...she asked me if I have someone I love. I just said "No". Saying: "I don't even know what 'love' is" seems a bit...she'd definitely call me weird. Then the others would probably laugh at me...

You felt...incomplete, like a jigsaw puzzle with only half the pieces. You felt the isolation, suffocating you. It hadn't been a conscious decision. You didn't awaken one morning and think 'You know what? This whole 'love' thing? It just isn't for me! ' You craved a connection, a bond of some kind - holding hands...a hug at most. Anything more was frightening to imagine. What if someone...pressured you? Or stole a kiss, as an offhanded action? You couldn't bear it...not even the mere thought. It was likely the main contributor to your chronic anxiety and paranoia. Your treatment at the hands of society, the ridicule and the fear of phrases such as "It's just a phase!" or, "You need to find the right person!"...they fuelled the flickering spark of villainy in your eyes.

After all, outcasts and monsters are interchangeable to most common folk.

But you didn't want those labels. You were a lost lamb, wandering aimlessly - what you really needed was guidance...someone who would listen and advise, someone who would accept you and every burden you carried, without question or quandary. But you said nothing...so you got nothing in return. Dabi was the closest to a...a source of strength? Motivation?...Potential love interest? But...how would you ever truly know? How could you discern the romantic from the platonic? It seemed impossible - simply a waste of time. Still, you never fully resigned to this fate of...loneliness.

You wanted to cherish, and to be cherished.

You wanted to love, and to be loved.

Perhaps it was the unyielding voice of fear, of desperation and pain, but...you just didn't know! You didn't know...and, it was difficult. You studied Dabi's face, and while nothing immediately heated your cheeks, he wasn't...unattractive. Aha! Maybe that was love? Alas, you discovered it to be more aesthetic attraction. It was a little disappointing, but perseverance should've been the key, right...?

Why? Why do I feel so little? Dabi is there for me, right? So surely if anyone, I should love him!...Do I love him? How can I tell? Is there some sort of test? How would a test even be administered? What kind of questions would I have to answer? I don't think I could answer them, even with study. If I'm struggling so much now...

And anyway...Dabi was a dominant male, whose sexuality was unclear. Even if you managed to settle on a definition of 'love', and figure out what role it played in your life...there was no guarantee that Dabi would want you. The jury was still out, on your gender - 'questioning' was your placeholder for the moment. But, you usually dressed masculine...would he be okay with someone so indecisive? Someone who might be neither male nor female? And, what if...what if he wasn't the one?

Say I can find love, and I start to understand it...who's to say that the person I love will be Dabi? It could be anyone! Maybe they were right, and I just haven't met the right person...but, I kind of want it to be Dabi? Is that...bad? Oh god, it sounds so selfish! He'll just be tied down, and if we find out that I don't actually love him...what would he do? At the very least, he'd be angry...

Dabi...the more you recalled his honey-laced voice, all the flirting you failed to notice until it was pointed out (clearly, he was doing that in jest), and those blue eyes (steely from years on the run, that probably depleted the pools of guilt and regret often accompanying mass killings, thievery and other criminal acts), the more confusion festered. You just didn't understand! Was it love? Or was it conversion? Were you trying to become 'normal'? Well, as normal as a villain could be...? Or did Dabi really mean something...something greater than you believed? Something...beyond what you currently knew?

This journey of self-discovery had approached a torturous junction.

Why were relationships so sought after, so expected? Even you desired one. How else could you ever hope to form a deep bond, or receive that fabled 'feeling of ecstasy' from holding hands or hugging? If there was no romance, mainstream media would lead you to the conclusion that there isn't a 'proper' or 'deep enough' connection - there can't be. You wanted to experience these things with Dabi. No-one else. You couldn't explain why. He was...an unusual character, mysterious and with perhaps a similar level of complexity as the daunting questions you were asking yourself. But mentioning your plight to him simply wasn't an option. Villains were responsible for themselves; the League was nothing more than a safety net.

Besides, Dabi was heartless.

...Or so he liked to be portrayed.

Urghhh...why is this so complicated? How am I supposed to know if I love him? The signs are...increased heart rate and blood to the face, right...? That seems unhealthy...is that actually supposed to be a good thing??

"Hey, you stopped spacing out yet, (V/n)?"

Shit! No, no, no! I haven't finished spacing out!

Sheepishly, you turned in the direction of the voice. Why did Dabi always seem to materialise out of thin air, whenever you thought about him? Did you magic him here, by accident? Subconsciously? However you managed that...you hated it. Your existential crisis really didn't need a spectator. Break out the popcorn, why don't you?

Can't I have a break down in peace? Wait...am I even in my room?...Did I seriously question my entire existence right here in the bar? It's a good thing there's no-one else here...I don't need more people telling me that I'm crazy...

You sighed. "...Yeah."

His brows furrowed - this was unfamiliar territory. Helping people had never been his speciality, especially given his own trauma . But for you...it was certainly worth a shot. "What's up? You on your man-period or something?"

Off to a spectacularly dreadful start. "I - I don't know if I'm a man, though...how could I-"

"Relax, it was a joke. Your pronouns are they/them, right? I'm not gonna call you a man just for the sake of argument. Nah...Hey, scoot over." A for effort.

"You could sit literally anywhere else."

He smirked. "You gonna stop me, sweet-cheeks?"

Sweet...?

"Thought not. Anyway, what's going on? You've been all doom-and-gloom for the past...two hours." He motioned over to the clock.

Had you honestly spent so long in contemplation? Gods, you could've unlocked the secrets of the universe, but no. "I've...kinda been asking myself that."

"Oh?" It was obviously a prompt, but talk of your romantic inclination (or lack thereof) would likely be regarded in the realm of 'stupid' and 'childish', so...could really you trust him?

I've always been too nervous to take risks...Guess now's as good a time as any to change that.

You swallowed down the uncertainties, the anxiety and everything in-between. They didn't help - they only hindered. And...you did need to release this burden, that weighed you down so heavily.

"Um...it's - it's...confusing. Really...confusing. I guess, I simple terms: I don't know what 'love' is. I know it probably sounds really dumb to you, and I feel stupid for even saying it, but...I've never...never had a crush, never been in love. I don't...I don't feel anything romantic towards, well...anyone!"

"Not even a bit?" He asked, blank-faced.

"I - I don't know. I really want to, though. I'm just...I'm scared. There's always this underlying fear of...what if - what if someone forces me? Y'know? What if...I date someone, and they can't accept that I'm different...that I might never feel anything for them? I don't want to be lonely forever, Dabi! I want someone, I really do! I say I've never been in love, but...the truth is, I just don't know! I know that I don't need to kiss someone. That's what I...what I don't want, but...I - I still want to hold hands with someone! I'd still like a hug, every once in a while...I don't know what I'm doing, or really...who I am."

For a few moments, he was silent beside you, just drinking in the flood of information. He refrained from reaching out, or gazing too intently. It took time to settle on an appropriate response. "You're looking at it as an issue, though - something you've gotta resolve, before you can move on. I'm not the best with advice, trust me...but I can tell you that it's a journey. It'll continue and evolve, as long as it needs to. You'll...probably know when you're ready, or...something. All that sappy crap. You don't have to force yourself to understand it all now."

I'll know...?

"When I'm...ready?" You repeated, eyes tracing the lines on your palm.

"Yeah...probably."

Just before you lost all coherency, a single thought fluttered to the forefront of your mind: My heart...just...skipped a beat?!

[Word Count: 1775]

#bnha dabi #my hero academia x reader #mha dabi #dabi is a todoroki #dabi x reader #pride #greyromantic #asexual #questioning #honestly same #bnha x reader

[heademptynothoughts]

Just something I need to get off my chest:

I am a raging aromantic asexual. But I still love love. I fangirl over way too many fictional couples and smile like a crazy person when a cute moment happens between them. I swoon over romantic moments and that confuses a lot of people (my dad especially which is actually the reason I’m writing all of this even tho he’ll never see it).

I don’t experience romantic attraction (or sexual attraction but let’s focus on my aro side for the time being). I don’t want or need to be in a romantic relationship, the love I share with my friends and family is enough for me. However, that doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate romance or find it extremely adorable. I love seeing other people in love. It’s just not something that is an option for me.

I hate the notion that because I’m aroace, I’m some kind of robot, that I’m unfeeling – I’m not. Romantic feelings not being in the cards for me doesn’t mean that I can’t find joy in seeing it in action. I still have feelings, I just don’t have one specific type of feeling.

#aromantic #asexual #aroace #rant kinda #lgbt #idk if anyone will read this #but i needed to say it #putting this out into the universe

[sazandorable]

Ace Archivist headcanons questions!

So I've been chatting a lot with many different people about TMA and about our respective and differing experiences and (dis)likes in regards to asexuality, and I figured it could be fun to talk about our personal headcanons about the Archivist's asexuality!

(*Feel free to mention your own experiences too if you wish, especially if you get happiness from projecting things onto Jon, but no pressure to share, and you do not need to identify as aspec to participate in this.)

/!\ I'm deliberately putting the NSFW ones at the very end so people can easily skip those, please remain SFW in the first part or warn for NSFW answers! /!\

Where on the ace spectrum do you see Jon?

Is he also on the aromantic spectrum?

A large proportion of aspec people also aren't cisgender (x), what about your Jon?

Has he figured out his asexuality? If yes, when/how?

Is he out? To whom? How did that go?

What does he think and feel about his asexuality? Does it bring him joy? grief? annoyance?

What does he think of labels? Does he use them, and if yes, which?

How does he relate to the queer/LGBTQIA+ community?

What's his stance on dating? How does he navigate relationships?

What's his stance on sex? Repulsed, favourable, neutral? (stay sfw here, you may detail in the next part)

What's his stance on touching and marks of affection, like cuddling or kissing?

What's his stance on fictional material about romance/sexuality/relationships (ie romcoms, love songs, ...)?

Are there things he Does Not Get?

Are there things he has given up on? Are there things he yearns for? Are there things he finds ridiculous and is relieved to not have to deal with?

What Ace Culture things does he ping? Space ace, cake ace, really excited about dragons?

Anything from canon that made you go "OH, ACE MOOD!" or that makes you really happy and you want to point out?

NSFW PART (OPTIONAL):

What's his stance on sex, part 2: any details? Are there situations or acts he's okay or not okay with?

Does he engage in sex indirectly, i.e. solo, toys, watching a partner, watching or reading erotica or p*rn, etc.?

What's his libido like?

Does he have kinks? Sexual or not?

#jonathan sims #the magnus archives #asexuality #asexual character #ace archivist headcanons #i gotta go but i'll fill out my own answers later today #if you reply in a separate post please tag me i'd love to see it!!! #*i've edited the first question a bit bc my wording led to some confusion

[bardic-inspo]

N, S & T please!

Thanks!

N - Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice)

More MacCready content in general. I don’t feel like our merc gets enough love!

On that note, more DeaCready as well, hehe.

This is getting redundant now, but I sometimes wonder what the FO4 fandom looked like in its heydey. More activity in general would be cool to see, but it’s a years-old game. On the flip side of that, it’s neat to be in a smaller fandom niche and get to know people more personally that way!

S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon (prompts optional but encouraged)

Ahh I’ve been thinking about Deacon x Mac x Nat lately. I have a million headcanons for them and I’m just gonna stream-of-consciousness some of them:

Natasha is feast or famine with sleep: either out like a rock or not at all.

Deacon and Mac are both light sleepers from a lifetime of rude awakenings and having to be alert for potential threats. They marvel at, make fun of, and are a bit envious of Nat’s ability to zonk, which I see as a hold-over of her pre-war life.

Nat is most often in the middle when they sleep as a throuple. Mostly because she gets cold easily and also, Deacon has an ingrained preference to be close to the door and Mac prefers to be on Nat’s left when he can (or to have Deacon there when he can’t). 

The others still get the middle spot from time to time. Nat gets a lot of secret joy out of being a big spoon even though it’s usually more like a “jet pack” with her curled up and putting her cold toes on her spoon-ee’s back. 

Deacon has freckles and I am 100% am on the “he’s a ginger” bandwagon. 

Deacon starts to grow his hair back after some time in the throuple and Mac and Nat swoon loudly about it.

Language knowledge is lost if you don’t use it. There’s a point where Nat panics that she might be starting to forget how to speak/read Russian, so the guys have her read in it out loud to them from time to time as they’re doing other things. They might not understand what she’s saying, but it helps, and also, they think it’s hot.

As a family, they all really enjoy reading as a pastime. “Robbing” the library is a pretty common Saturday outing. 

Mac gets super worked up and anxious if/when either Nat or Deacon get sick. He very much wants to march out and shoot whatever caused it and sometimes needs to be persuaded that, maybe they should just try soup and rest first. This is a holdover from his experiences with Duncan.

T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending, about anything at all (gender identity, sexual or romantic orientation, extended family, sexual preferences like top/bottom/switch, relationship with poetry, seriously anything)

I’m really live and let live with headcanons. To each their own. If I had to pick a hill to die on, it’s that the game establishes that each of the romanceable companions can be romanced by a male or female SoSu, so they are all canonically attracted to multiple genders at least romantically speaking. Anything that says otherwise (i.e. Mac is straight because he’s with a female SoSu and Lucy was female) is just erasure honestly. I think there’s room within that to play with the idea of evolving identities or headcanons that, maybe one of them is just uncovering some aspect or change in their sexual orientation. I’m certainly not meaning to exclude any ideas about fluidity that way. And I’m definitely not looking to exclude asexuality or that spectrum of identities. I mostly just resent the idea of “playersexual” characters that do not have their own independent sexual/romantic orientations outside of what any player might “want” them to be, because I think that lends itself to the idea that an individual’s orientation is based on their partner’s gender and not on their own capacity for attraction. People often misinterpret bisexuality that way, so it’s something I’m particularly sensitive to.

I hope I didn’t totally put my foot in my mouth there! Hopefully my meaning is clear.

[Fandom Ask Meme]

#ask memes #theartofblossoming #deacon x maccready x natasha #spicy ot3

[ayy-spec]

Anything to Add?

The final question in this survey was a write-in section for people to leave any additional comments. 113 people responded.

Important/Particularly Interesting Comments

• I hope this goes well for you because you seem nice and if you have any advice for new to the community 15 year olds like me, don't be afraid to share because I'm trying to embrace my sexuality as much as possible but it can be hard when I don't know where to go or turn to to find what I'm supposed to do and where to ask questions and just fully embrass this part of me and it can be hard when I don't even know many if any aspecs so representation is great and it is helpful to hear your experiences and how you handle certain parts, so just keep doing what your doing because it is making a difference [note: 🥺🥺😭]

• i often consider myself more as just aroace rather than aro and ace seperately so i prefer seeing the blue and orange aroace flag over the individual aro and ace flags

• I don't really shorten my identity often with aroace, only when im feeling very romance repulsed and its been a while since I felt romantic attraction. I am a pan-demiromantic asexual. My pan label makes me feel more connected to the lgbt+ community bc it feels like my nonbinary and intersex status doesn't count either. I know I belong in the queer community, but the lgbt+ community is so sexual orientation focused.

• Thank you for having a wide variety of labels to choose from in the options!! I don't see the term aegoromantic very often on things, it feels nice to be known I guess haha

• Thank you for this, i recently started thinking about being in arospec and it was so relieving, all this time i thought something was wrong or maybe i was broken. I'm still trying to learn more about it, and I'm grateful for people willing to teach and help

• didn't realize I hadn't experienced sexual attraction until I finally did and was like "OH, no wonder all my other relationships felt like I was playing pretend"

• I dont often tell people I'm gray aroace. Not because of shame or it not being "as important" (I'm a gay trans dude) but I think because I just feel its a very intimate part of myself, as well as my romanticism and sexuality (in terms of like asexuality) feeling as though it doesn't always need a label. I'm fine just being myself most of the time, a lot of labels can be tricky for myself I think. I'm happy the label exists nonetheless though because Its nice to know I'm not the only one who feels like this.

• I'm queer! But if I'm getting down to the bones of it, I'm pan/ace. Still relearning how to be proud of that, after The Grand Clusterfuck years back.

• even though I would be considered to have an alloromantic orientation, alloace isn't really a term I feel any strong connection or attachment to

• i'd like to add that i do consider myself alloaro and use that label openly but i'd also not consider myself 100% allosexual. i'm questioning my sexuality but even if i do end up feeling more solidly ace-spec i'd still use the alloaro label

• Idk who else does this or if this is interesting enough to write down, but I thought I would! I use Aroace as a label. Other, smaller labels inside that would probably fit me better! Aroace feels too big, like it doesn't *really* define exactly who I am. But at the same time, I prefer using it because more people know what Aroace means (at least compared to myrromantic and myrsexual). I use Aroace so the public can define me. I don't typically use it around my close friends 'cause they already know my idiosyncrasies and where I really am. They already made their own definitions for me, so I don't have to make one for them!

• I'm still figuring myself out, so I leave myself at the blanket terms and hopefully everything'll work out in the end

The rest of the responses are below:

Comments Alerting Me About Typos (that I was then able to resolve)

• There's a typo in your "sexual orientation labels" question, because you have Aroflux listed and not Aceflux, but I didn't want to confuse things so I put Aceflux (which I do use) under Other. I also am polysexual (I flux between polysexual and asexual but I am always aegosexual) but didn't know if I should but it under Other anywhere since it's not an acespec label. I consider my polysexuality tied to me being aego/aceflux though, which is why I mention it here.

• the sexual orientations options are the same of the romantic ones ( for example, there's arovague and arospike in the sexual cathegory)

People Clarifying/Expounding Upon Their Own Identity/Experiences

·  to clarify: i'm unsure whether or not i am demi or aceflux; so i use graysexual since both labels technically fall under that as an umbrella term.

• I’m still a confused gorl and I really only know that I don’t like sex it sexual acts but I do like romantic and sensual acts

• Sex/romance repulsed and I have aesthetic attraction

• I'm also animesexual and fictosexual (and romantic I guess but I don't like using the SAM for myself).

• I have never seen most of these labels, haha, I expect one of them is the one I always forget that's for being aro due to past trauma but people always assume it's romantic/sexual trauma so I don't use it and thus have forgotten it...but that's the essay I'm not usually up for writing: was biromantic but then had several awful life events on top of each other and had a complete breakdown and have been aro since. Unclear if it's permanent but it's been 14 years now. [note: I believe this person is thinking of caedromantic]

• I tend to use the word ace more than asexual because it's shorter, but I don't feel more favorably about one than the other.

• i can't tell the difference between platonic vs romantic attraction, and am unsure if people i have "liked" in the past was romantic, platonic, or a fake stemming from peer pressure.

• Also Gender-Neutral/Agender

• I’m gray-aro but identify more with being biromantic even though I know I’m aro-spec. As for sexual orientation, I’m just completely ace xD

• The fact I'm still trying to figure out my gender makes it harder to pinpoint exactly what my orientations are :( but I usually say I'm queer, and if it's safe: Bi Ace, and if I can get more specific: biromantic grey-asexual

• I also use a platonic label (biplatonic). I use it not in a friendship way, but more like in a QPR way.

• Thank you for doing this! My identity on the aro/ace spectrums has shifted a lot over the years and while I’ve just settled on aroace and queer for the most part, this community is so diverse and under appreciated. People who find joy in/identify with micro-identities are valid and deserve representation!

• I'm still figuring out my romantic orientation but it's looking less allo by the day lmao

• My romantic label is very fluid, but in terms of sexual labels, very sex repulsed Asexual

• Content with just Aspec cause it's difficult to pinpoint anything but cool with both asexual/ace and aromantic/aro

• I think of my romantic orientation as halfway between aromantic and homoromantic

• I'm a polyamorous ace, if there'd be a way to include that sometimes that'd be neat :)

• I am still questioning my identity

• I used to identify as 100% ace but now I have no idea other than that I seem to be pan-ace in some way shape or form so my identity is ???people???

• Sex/romance repulsed and I have aesthetic attraction

• to clarify: i'm unsure whether or not i am demi or aceflux; so i use graysexual since both labels technically fall under that as an umbrella term.

Queer Rights

• Trans rights, baybee 🤠🦂

• I just hope a-spec and aro-spec people will experience less negativity and hate this year <3

• Aspec rights!!

• aspec rights, baby

People Being Nice to Me  (I appreciated this thank you everyone!!)

·  :)

• Have a good day

• Uhhh, cool survey, nice to see a lot of labels.... good job! Nothing I have to add, it was great

• Have fun chief, thank you for your work

• Thank you for creating!

• thanks for the survey! I don't know too many aspec in person so I love participating in things like this about the ace/aro community!

• Thank you for what you’re doing

• just hi :)

• thanks!!

• I really love your blog! Reading your posts always makes me happy :) [note: thank you!]

• Good luck, have a nice day !

• I hope you're having a good day :)

• you're lived and valid af!! have a great day!!!

• Thank you for all your hard work i really appreciate it ☺️

• Drink some water Right Now OP

• Nope, :> hope the best for you.

• Cool survey, 10/10 would survey again.

• 💛

• Have a nice day uwu

• Nope! Have a nice day!

• Thank you for making pride flag edits! They're really nice! [note: thank you!!]

• nope, but this is really cool!!

• ❤️

• Have a good day.

• I think this survey idea is super cool! Definitely a great way to see what sort of aspec people are on tumblr :)

• You are doing the lords work

• Thank you for asking us.

• good luck!

• This is really cute idea :)

• I hope you're having a nice day!

• Good luck in your endevours!

• Thank you for making our community visible!

• Have a good day :3

• Have a good day!!

• Keep doing great stuff!

• Thank you for all the positivity I get from your blog! It's super helpful, keep it up :) [note: thank you!!]

• thanks for doing this. recognition is always nice

• Have fun <3

• Lots of love 💛

• This is a cool project, thanks for doing it and good luck! :)

People Saying They Love Me (and I love you, random a-specs)

·  i love you OP!!!!!

• love you, hope you have a great day

An A-Spec Person Being Rude to Other A-Specs

• If you enjoy sex with your romantic partner then you are not asexual

A Person Who Is Not A-Spec Being Rude To A-Specs

• sweetie im sorry that you're so insecure that you feel like you have to make up new identities to feel better about yourself. if you are a lesbian or bisexual please know that you are welcome in the community, but other than that making thousands of microlabels like this makes a huge joke out of what was once an important and respected group. nobody takes us seriously anymore because of this shit. does labelling your identity like this really help you with anything? demisexual and fraysexual and all this are just fancy words for normal human feelings that everyone has. there is no need to microlabel it.

Other

· [variations of “no” (12)]

• not sure that helps lmao but still hope it does. all the best

• Axolotls (or as I like to call them, asexulotls) are amazing and I love them [Note: the man in question]

• Sorry, I can't remember the names of any blogs that do edits

• Ok random but the colors of the aro/ace flag? The blue and orange one? They’re gorgeous.

• I'm not so sure if I should use the aroace flag, I feel comfortable using both aro and ace flags, but I don't like the colors for the aroace flag :c [note: these are in chronological order, it’s a total coincidence that these comments are together]

• Curious to see where the survey goes

• It would be cool if you could also do some aplatonic-spectrum edits!

• there were fully half of the terms on that list that i had never even seen before. like, everything below litho down to no label was entirely new to me. at some point i will look into those! (but not right now, my brain is full enough at the moment)

• actually had to look up the majority of these orientations. Thank you for the opportunity to learn!

• Gonna reblog and follow and hopefully learn a bit more, about others and myself

Note: The only comment that is not listed in order is the first comment, which I put at the top because I found it the most important. It’s so important that kids and teens have space to explore their identity and learn about themselves. The reason I made this blog in the first place was because I was 19 and working on figuring out my gender and sexuality. Now that I’m a bit older and understand things better, I’m so glad that I’m able to help people in this way. 

I make it a point to be very openly queer in my life and at work because I need LGBTQ+ people, especially youths, to know that we’re here. I’m lucky that I live somewhere that I can be visibly queer and speak about it openly. We are everywhere, and there’s more of us than you think!

Something that I really like about the comments at the top is that they show how diverse we are, and how people use words differently. Some people feel like they’re more aroace than aromantic and asexual separately, and others consider their romantic and sexual orientations to be completely different things.

I definitely relate to the person who identifies are myrromantic and myrsexual with their friends but just says aroace when speaking with people they don’t know as well. I believe a lot of people use different words depending on who they’re speaking with.

#survey results #aphobia cw

[nocturnalchangeling]

internalized aphobia

Something we don’t really talk about is how for asexuals and aromantics, internalized aphobia comes from feeling sort of selfish advocating for oneself again and again.

It feels selfish because sometimes you are the only representation you got in some spaces, so talking about your experiences can sometimes feel like talking too much at once.

It feels selfish because liberal circles may wrongly use the word “asexual” to mean celibate, chaste, conservative, sex-hating (not that any of the previous actually means sex-hating), and in the meantime conservative circles may wrongly react to the word as if it means being single out of spite, out of hating the opposite sex.

It feels selfish because “aromantic” so immediately translates to “giving up” or “narcissistic” in people’s minds.

It feels selfish because even within the church, there is such an emphasis on romance and making families that it feels like skimping on God’s plan to see one’s future differently. It feels selfish because it feels like denying others a chance, or straying from the path to feel no attraction. Even among celebrated celibacy, it feels like it’s supposed to be a sacrifice or calling and it’s just existing without the attraction. (Although I’ll bet there are indeed celibate asexuals who are thriving).

It feels selfish because a lot of the queer community is fighting for the right to love, to give their whole being to another the same way straight people get to, and aces and aros are just fighting for the right to be. It feels selfish because the battle isn’t as urgent as fighting for anti-discrimination laws, anti-hate policies, equal rights—it’s mostly an internal battle, just fighting to be known and respected and normalized. It feels selfish because it’s not existing for someone else and at times it can feel like being unloving.

It feels selfish when you’re an immigrant’s child whose family came this far and expected to continue through you. It feels like if your parents gave everything for you, there is sheer audacity in not giving them grandkids.

But chances are it’s not selfish, it’s just lonely.

Chances are it’s secretly writing permission slips for others who never knew they had options outside of amatonormativity.

Chances are there are many aces and aros who wouldn’t have known without your bravery to live your truth first.

Chances are the platonic love an ace or aro has to give frees up so many other people into realizing there truly is more to life than the model they were always give.

Chances are there are more of us than we think.

Chances are if the gays, trans, enbies in the queer community show everyone else—even the straights—that there is joy in breaking gender norms, then perhaps aces and aros show everyone else—even the allos—that there is joy in other things besides sex and romance.

Chances are that’s what being queer is all about, being someone whose very existence breaks down barriers, however quietly and triumphantly.

[dreamybandee]

NAME / ALIAS:  Joy ARE YOU OVER 18?  Yes  /  No IS YOUR MUSE(S) OVER 18?  Yes /  No? WHEN WAS YOUR BLOG ESTABLISHED? October 14th, 2019

– W R I T I N G  –

ARE YOU SELECTIVE ABOUT WHO YOU WRITE WITH? No (anyone)  /  Semi (most people) / Yes (some people) / highly (few people) / Private (mutuals only)

ARE YOU SELECTIVE ABOUT WHO YOU FOLLOW? No (anyone)  /  Semi (most people) /  yes (some people) /  Highly (few people)

IF YOUR MUSE IS CANON, HOW MUCH DO YOU ADHERE TO CANON? Not at all  / A little  / Some  / Mostly /  Strictly /  Not Applicable

WHAT POST LENGTHS DO YOU WRITE? one-liners  / Single-para /  Multi-para  /  Novella

DO YOU USE ICONS AND/OR GIFS? No / Gifs / Icons / Yes / Sometimes

DO YOU WRITE ON OTHER PLATFORMS? No  / Yes / I’m not really sure so I’m adding an idk option here

WHAT LEVEL OF PLOTS DO YOU WRITE? Unplotted /  open-ended plots  / semi-plotted /  Fully Plotted Epics

HOW QUICKLY DO YOU USUALLY RESPOND TO THREADS? very slow (more than a month) / slow (3-4 weeks)  / average (1-2 weeks) / fast (less than one week)  /  very fast (less than three days)

WHAT TYPES OF THEMES DO YOU LIKE? Adventure / Romance  / Fluff /  angst / Smut / Violence / Tragedy / Domestic /  Family

WHAT GENRES DO YOU LIKE? ( FEEL FREE TO ADD! ) High Fantasy / Supernatural / Science Fiction / Historical /  Horror / Comedy / Romantic / Drama / Action / Adventure /  Espionage

ARE THERE ANY THEMES YOU’RE UNCOMFORTABLE WRITING ON YOUR BLOG? (NOT TRIGGERS) No  /  Yes  /  Sometimes

DO YOU HAVE ANY TRIGGERS? HOW DO YOU REQUEST IT TAGGED? Yes. I have one for dr.owning/su.ffocation. It would be greatly appreciated and a ton of help if you tagged that. 

– S H I P P I N G –

WHAT TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS ARE YOU OPEN TO? Romantic  /  Platonic  /  Familial

WHAT TYPES OF PRE-ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIPS ARE YOU OPEN TO? Romantic  / Platonic /  Familial / All of the Aforementioned

DO YOU HAVE OTPS? No /  Chemistry Only  / Yes

DO YOU HAVE NOTPS? No / Yes (Romantic ship of Bandee and Dedede is yikes. ;;)

WHAT IS YOUR MUSE’S SEXUAL ORIENTATION? Heterosexual /  Heteroflexible  / Bisexual / Pansexual  /  Homoflexible  /  Homosexual / demisexual  /  Sapiosexual /  Asexual  /

WHAT IS YOUR MUSE’S ROMANTIC ORIENTATION? Heteroromantic  /  Heteroflexible  / Biromantic /  Homoflexible  /  Homoromantic  /  Panromantic/  Demiromantic /  Sapioromantic  / Aromantic /

ARE YOU COMFORTABLE WRITING SMUT? No  /  Selectively /  Yes /  Privately

HOW EARLY IN A RELATIONSHIP DO YOU SHIP ROMANTICALLY? Autoship / During Plotting /  After a couple IC interactions / Several IC interactions / Slow burn / Plot dependent /  Never

ARE YOU OPEN TO TOXIC SHIPS? No / Selectively / Yes / I am not sure

ARE YOU OPEN TO PROBLEMATIC SHIPS? No / Selectively /  Yes / I am not sure

ARE YOU OPEN TO POLYSHIPPING? No / Selectively / Yes / I am not sure

ARE YOU AN EXCLUSIVE SHIPPER? Never / Sometimes / Yes

DOES CRACK SHIPPING EVER HAPPEN? Nope   /  Yes

TAGGED BY: Stole it from dash!  TAGGING: Go ahead and steal it!

REPOST. DON’T REBLOG.

#{ Minigame | Repost Meme } #{ off duty | ooc } #//long post

[aspec-stories-blog]

Good News!

romance (mention), romantic attraction (mention), genderfluid character, fanfic, Loki Agent of Asgard, Young Avengers, Loki, Verity Willis, Kate Bishop, Billy Kaplan, Teddy Altman, Tommy Kaplan

Some days it was harder than others to pinpoint what what he was going to be like. If he was going to be a woman or a man. If he was going to like a man or a woman or someone like him. If he was actually going to feel what the Midgardians called sexual attraction or not. Most days it didn’t matter since most days concerned whether his current mission (either given to him by the All Mother or himself) would get him killed (or in deeper trouble) or not.

  But some days it mattered. Like today.

  As he nervously paced himself in the living room, half mumbling about the state of himself and his home, Verity sitting on his couch watching him do this. Didn’t try to speak a half truth to him as she didn’t know how Loki’s guests would take to the new version of himself. All she was speaking when he stopped pacing for a moment. “Either sit down or risk having your neighbors complain about the racket you’re making and probably try to throw you out since you didn’t get this place legally.”

  “They won’t hear a thing.” He said, looking over at her. “I made sure to soundproof the place since some spells can get noisy. And catching up on Migard pop culture means shouting at the tv for some entirely stupid writing.”

  “Usually there’s another reason a good looking guy would say why they soundproofed their place,” She said, “But since it’s you, I have to hope that you don’t have something in mind for them that ends with the world somehow ending.”

  “Not planning, but the night is still young.” He said before resuming his pacing. The steps echoed in the apartment, somehow louder than before.

  Verity sighed. She honestly didn’t know what to do with Loki when he was nervous like this. He usually would be sprouting some half lie that Verity knew entirely was believed due to how much he believed it and all would be right. But since it was people that he has told her in confidence about some of the things he did to them, she knew he had a right to be nervous.

  Still, she stood up and walked over to him. Gently, she got a hold of his hand and held it into hers. “Why don’t we watch something that’ll distract you for now?”

  For a few moments, he blinked his eyes, pulled out of his haze of worries. Looking towards the tv, he knew what they should watch until he got the dreaded knock. Loki didn’t say a word as he dragged Verity to the couch and pulled up a show that he’d come to adore since diving into the pop culture of the realm on the tv.

  Verity leaned back into the soft cushions of the couch and watched as the opening of Futurama played, seeing Loki be a little less tense than before. She let the dialogue of the characters wash over her as she closed her eyes to catch up on some sleep.

  A few episodes passed by the two of them before a knock was heard. Loki stiffened up for a few moments, not moving to get up or pause the show. Verity gave him a light shove, her eyes still closed and suddenly he was up and moving towards the door. There was another knock, this time in more rapid pace and more impatient than the one before.

  He quickly opened the door to have Tommy nearly hit him with his fist. The speedster barely looked at him before zooming into the apartment. There was a sigh from Billy (Tommy’s twin, Loki found out just recently when deciding to invite some of the Young Avengers) and a look of apology from Teddy. 

  “Come in.” Was all he said before turning around. There were a few whispers from the couple behind him, but he also picked up the light steps from Kate who was standing behind them.

  As he entered back into the living room, he saw the way Verity looked like she had been in a wind turbine. Her red hair was messed up and blown everywhere and her clothes looking more ruffled and wrinkled than when Loki last left her.

  She was also sending a glare his way.

  “Couldn’t have warned me that one of your friends was a speedster?” She says in an annoyed tone. At the same time she started to straighten out her clothing.

  “I would, but the result would have been the same.”

  “A warning, Loki, I just needed a warning. Do you know what it’s like to suddenly have a strong burst of wind rush over you?”

  “I’m sensing your facetious tone here.”

  There was a groan and she headed towards his bathroom to fix her hair. Then from behind him was a light snicker. Turning towards the group, he was faced with the mixed looks of surprise and amusement. 

  “Oh, please don’t stop for us. It’s hilarious to see you bickering with your girlfriend,” Kate said, smirking growing wider when she caught his gaze.

  As he narrowed his eyes at what she was implying between him and Verity, Teddy spoke up, “It’s nice to see you again, Loki.”

  “Yeah, it’s a joy.” Loki said rushingly. “Why do you think she’s my girlfriend?”

  The three of them shared a look. Then a silent conversation that he knew he wasn’t being let in on. Just before it could break up and they started to explain themselves, Tommy rushed back into the room and seated himself on the couch.

  “They think that because you bicker like an old couple. Plus, she scolds like one too.”

  “Tommy,” All of them say, exasperated.

  “Well, it’s better than dancing around the subject,” Verity said, returning with her look close to as it was before Tommy rushed by her. Her eyes sweep over the room and the situation, finally settling on Loki. “Though none of you are right about us. We’re friends.”

  “Denial or something else that you’ve gathered us here for?” Tommy asked. Then rushed towards the kitchen to stand on the other side of the breakfast nook. And once more Billy sighed, his face meeting his palm.

  “Something else.” Loki replied. He motioned Verity to follow him and moved towards the couch. As he sat down, he also motioned the others in the room to take a seat.

  Billy and Teddy took two of the three seats of the breakfast nook while Kate took a seat in the other piece of furniture that Loki had bothered to put in besides the couch, tv and coffee table. Once settled, they all looked towards Loki, curiosity filtering through on their expressions.

  He shifted in his seat, unsure of where he should start. Their stares reminded of what he had done to each of them when he was younger (of what he had done to his other self) and it made him wonder where he truly stood with them. There had been no contact between them over the last few years (not since the night they finally defeated Mother) and the only reason it had started back up was due to Verity giving him the opinion that maybe he should apologize. That he should give them the option to either accept or reject his new attempt at being their friends.

  He’d made contact with Kate, the most likely to not go out and try to end him for doing such a thing. Soon it spread to Tommy, Teddy and Billy as he was given a push by both Verity and Kate to do so. There were tense conversations between all of them for what he had done with Mother and what he had done to each of them because of that.

  And yet here they were, still looking at him like they were friends that he’d seen from many tv shows who’d cared.

   A soft touch from Verity wrapped around his shoulder, knowing her contact would be a calming effect. “I wanted to speak about parts of my identity if we’re to move forward with our friendship. Verity suggested that it would be best to talk to you in person rather over in text to gauge the tone from each of you.”

  “And in usual fashion, he’d rather get it all over with.” She says, lightly patting him on the back. There was a light chuckle from the others.

  “Well, let’s hear Lokster.” Tommy said loudly, zooming back into the living room.

  “The easiest part to start with is that I am both man and woman.”

  “Genderfluid?” Kate said questioningly. Like she was pulling the word from deep in her mind.

  “Yes that’s the Midgard term for it.”

  “Sweet! What do you look like as a woman?”

  “Probably not a lot different, Tommy,” Billy sighed out. 

  As Tommy went to retort something at his twin, Loki quickly shifted from a man to a woman. It felt slightly odd when he wasn’t feeling the way he usually would when shifting to this body, but it was well worth it to see the rest of the Young Avengers looking shocked like they were.

  “Oh, are you free to date?” Tommy asked, rushing to Loki’s side that didn’t have Verity.

  “That was the other part. Well two parts.” He admitted. Loki watched as Tommy sat back, looking over him carefully as he shifted back into a man. “I’m gray asexual as well as biromantic.”

  “You’re Ace?” Teddy asked with wonderment. A different reaction from what Loki expected.

  “Huh, that might explain a few things over the years since that night.” Billy says with a similar look like his boyfriend sitting next to him.

  “Yes, I’m Ace.”

  “Congrats.” Kate says. A smile spread over her face, happy with what she was hearing.

  “So you are still free to date?” Tommy asked, a cheeky grin spreading.

  “Yes, Tommy, I am. Though I doubt you have the patience to do so.” Loki replied.

  “Hey, hey, don’t judge me based on my speed.”

  “Besides, don’t you have David as a boyfriend?” His brother said. A smile that only came when a sibling was messing with other came over his face when Tommy speed over at him.

  Loki could only watch in amusement as their fighting involved the others in the room, including Verity surprisingly. At some point, he started his episode of Futurama once more to hear Bender loudly proclaim ‘Bite my shiny metal ass!’ amiss the chaos.

- - -

by @too-music

#author: too-music #weekly prompt 2 (August 2019) #// content warnings: #romance (mention) #romantic attraction (mention) #violence (mention) #death (mention) #// author-added tags: #genderfluid character #fanfic #Loki Agent of Asgard #Young Avengers #Loki #Verity #Willis #Kate Bishop #Billy Kaplan #Teddy Altman #Tommy Kaplan #posting mod: Linz #wow you really delivered!!! thank you ^.^ #aspec Loki is such a wholesome hc #submission

[reconditarmonia]

Dear Chocolate Box Author

Hi! Thank you for writing for me! I’m reconditarmonia here and on AO3. I have anon messaging off, but mods should be able to contact me if you have any questions.

Dishonored | Fullmetal Alchemist | Machineries of Empire | The Penumbra Podcast | Simoun

General likes:

– Relationships that aren’t built on romance or attraction. They can be romantic or sexual as well, but my favorite ships are all ones where it would still be interesting or compelling if the romantic component never materialized.

– Loyalty kink! Trust, affectionate or loving use of titles, gestures of loyalty, replacing one’s situational or ethical judgment with someone else’s, risking oneself (physically or otherwise) for someone else, not doing so on their orders. Can be commander-subordinate or comrades-in-arms.

– Heists, or other stories where there’s a lot of planning and then we see how the plan goes.

– Femslash, complicated or intense relationships between women, and female-centric gen. Women doing “male” stuff (possibly while crossdressing).

– Stories whose emotional climax or resolution isn’t the sex scene, if there is one.

– Uniforms/costumes/clothing.

– Stories, history, and performance. What gets told and how, what doesn’t get told or written down, behavior in a society where everyone’s consuming media and aware of its tropes, how people create their personas and script their own lines.

Smut Likes: clothing, uniforms, sexual tension, breasts, manual sex, cunnilingus, grinding, informal d/s elements, intensity; stories whose resolution isn’t the sex scene.

A note: if we matched on an / ship, I generally don't require you to include a kiss, sex, or overt romantic language if you feel that you'd have to shoehorn it in. I'll trust that you wrote it with shippy intent.

General DNW: rape/dubcon, torture, other creative gore; unrequested AUs, including “same setting, different rules” AUs such as soulmates/soulbonds; PWP; food sex; embarrassment; focus on pregnancy; Christmas/Christian themes; focus on unrequested canon or non-canon ships.

—

Fandom: Dishonored

Ship(s): Delilah Copperspoon/Billie Lurk; Breanna Ashworth & Kirin Jindosh; Emily Kaldwin & Delilah Copperspoon

I find Delilah such a fantastic and fascinating villain, and I'd love to read more about her relationships with Billie or Emily. I’d love to know more about Billie’s time in Delilah’s gang - what does she see in Delilah, or Delilah in her, beyond using each other to get ahead, what do they want from each other? I imagine it might fascinate and please Delilah to have Billie’s submission and maybe even some level of trust - to do what? It'd be neat to read an AU of the end of KoD where Billie stays in Dunwall, whether she's won or lost against Daud - or even of the end of Brigmore Witches, if you want to AU Delilah's plot into something that doesn't put her into a child's body. Something addressing clothing (given the iconic costumes of both the Witches and the Whalers) and/or nudity? Something in the timeskip or DH2 timeframe? With regard to Emily, I'm specifically interested in adult Emily here - what happens if Emily doesn't escape at the beginning of DH2? (Or is captured at some point, I guess.) Delilah seems happy enough to keep her alive - does she make her a witch, want her in court as her niece? How does Emily feel about any of this as she learns about Delilah's past? Or, does Emily maintain a relationship with her aunt after the end of DH2, whether because there's a way to visit or communicate with her or in an AU where she's defeated differently and sticks around? How might Delilah's art fit into any of these scenarios? The differences in how they fight?

I would also love fic about Breanna and Jindosh's terrible friendship/working relationship. Is their distaste for everyone else enough to overcome their distaste for each other? Put them at a fancy party (Luca's or otherwise) kvetching about other people. Tell me more about the lead-up to the seance, or mutual projects where Breanna contributed more of the magic and Jindosh more of the science - or vice versa! Breanna's got a very scientific mind and career herself and Jindosh isn't above dabbling in Void shit. Get them drunk together one night. If you can futz with the numbers enough for it to make sense, write me an AU where they're in an arranged marriage and end up as a (secretly? idk) platonic power couple. (If you go with this version I'd prefer that you write Jindosh as gay or asexual.)

Fandom-Specific DNW/Exception: Please do not touch on Jindosh's nonlethal option in any way whatsoever. With regard to Delilah/Billie, I have dubcon in my general DNWs but with Delilah’s...everything it seems potentially unreasonable to categorically DNW it here. Billie going along with things because she feels like she should or must is fine (although I’d also be very game for fic about her desiring and wanting Delilah/this), but I still don’t want to read anything involving altered or removed ability to consent such as mind-altering magic, sex pollen, drugs, etc. Additionally, Delilah/Breanna is an exception to my unrequested ships DNW - feel free to include it in any of these requests.

—

Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist

Ship(s): Scar & Original Ishvalan Character(s); Scar & Miles; Olivier Mira Armstrong & Miles & Briggs Soldiers

One of the things that really hit close to home about canon was the Ishval plot; I like that it’s important and not just backstory or setup for other stuff, and that there are multiple characters who are Ishvalan or of Ishvalan descent, rather than a genocide plot being a convenient reason to have one or no Ishvalan perspectives in the story. I’d really be interested in reading anything about, well, what do you do during or in the wake of a genocide: Miles’s seemingly increasing identification with his Ishvalan background; one or both of them in the post-canon rebuilding; what is is to be Amestrian *and* Ishvalan; what Scar (or OCs) are able to keep from their culture and community and what was lost (and what evolves), whether that’s in “Amestrian” cities and towns during or after canon, or in post-canon Ishval; saving the testimonies or the culture. Doesn’t need to be angsty if that’s not what you’re into; indeed, surviving/building a new life/finding joy/celebrating one’s culture and heritage after that kind of thing are meaningful too.

Or, Briggs and its mixture of heartwarming and id-satisfying loyalty kink. (The watch! Buccaneer handing Olivier a clean pair of gloves after she kills Raven! Constant and deeply sincere saluting! And Olivier's lack of patience for anyone's shit.) Either ordinary or extraordinary circumstances - daily life in the fort, a battle with Drachma where they work together seamlessly, surviving a storm or the typical winter cold - would make me happy, but I especially love those shows of loyalty. Entire Briggs Is Gay would also non-ironically be neat, as would other ways of exploring the idea of Briggs being a united wall made up of people with a lot of secrets and/or racial and gender differences.

Fandom-Specific DNW: Please don’t give Scar a name; I personally am fine eliding any narration issues with “how would he refer to himself in his own POV?” in my brain. I would also prefer that Ishvalan culture be worldbuilt rather than borrowed wholesale from a real-life culture.

—

Fandom: Machineries of Empire

Ship(s): Ajewen Cheris & Garach Jedao Shkan; Ajewen Cheris & Original Mwennin Characters; Ajewen Cheris/Neshte Khiruev; Moroish Nija/Shuos Feiyed; Vauhan Mikodez & Zehun

I've just recently gotten into this fandom, and I love the loyalty kink and the worldbuilding so much - I just want more! I'm partway through Revenant Gun now, so my prompts are somewhat unspecific, but I expect to be done with Glass Cannon by the time of reveals, so don't worry about spoilers.

Anyway, as I said, I love loyalty kink, including platonic loyalty kink - trust, gestures of loyalty, the times that trust or willingness to follow/lead is put under severe situational strain and holds, or the places where these things get thorny instead of straightforward because one character has to betray or hurt the other for the larger goal that they both believe in and work towards, or to keep the other safe. Some of the things I like in canon along these lines are Mikodez's showing Zehun the contingency plans in Raven Stratagem, and everything with "I'm your gun" (which I'm vaguely aware that I'm going to love even more by the time I'm caught up). Any story for Cheris & Jedao, Cheris/Khiruev, or Mikodez & Zehun that involved these tropes would be wonderful.

I'm also interested in the Mwennin subplot. I would love to know more about Cheris, Mwennin culture, and other Mwennin at any point before, during, or after canon. I also like the idea of Nija and Feiyed staying in touch after Feiyed rescues/recruits Nija, and Feiyed gradually learning about Mwennin culture as they start/continue a relationship - we know it can be adoptive, so does she even at any point start to consider herself part of it? (Or have them work together on a covert mission, no reason we shouldn't get loyalty kink in here too.)

Fandom-Specific DNW: I have dubcon in my general DNWs and would like to reiterate that I don't want to read formation instinct playing a part in a Cheris/Khiruev relationship.

—

Fandom: The Penumbra Podcast

Ship(s): Miasma/The Proctor

What can I say? Criminal older female academics would be a GREAT ship. I'd love to see their first meeting at some conference or academic event (or criminal thing), or their first date, or the two of them working together on some scheme - does Miasma "consult" the Proctor, or does the Proctor want to create an exam based on Miasma's field of expertise, or are they both going for the same goal? What do they like about each other, or find frustrating about each other? (If you need to fudge the timelines to make it work, that's fine, but I'm definitely interested in the characters as middle-aged or older. Also fine by me if you want to somehow AU their fates to get them together in the "present" timeline.)

—

Fandom: Simoun

Ship(s): Any (Aaeru & Neviril & Paraietta & Rodoreamon & Floef & Vyuraf; Aaeru/Neviril; Mamiina & Neviril; Mamiina/Neviril; Neviril/Aaeru & Neviril/Paraietta; Paraietta & Neviril; Paraietta/Rodoreamon)

This is a perennial request for me and anything (other than, I guess, the slice-of-lifeiest slice-of-life) would make me very happy, but I'm particularly interested in the military side of the canon - how the war changes all the characters and their relationships with one another, how Everything is Beautiful and Then Shit Gets Real but amidst the war-is-hell there’s still the creation of bonds of trust and loyalty and chances to do what’s right (the bits with the Plumbish priestesses, for instance). Every character gets a chance to develop and make choices that are all brave in different ways. I'd love loyalty kink here, but I'm also up for Magic, for an exploration of the characters' adult lives on the other end of the series's coming-of-age, or nearly anything.

Some ideas - what happens post-canon if Neviril and Aeru make it back to the main world when war is brewing again, but Neviril has no one from the old cohort to lead because they can’t fly anymore? What does she do, or see her role as being - a leader for peace, for war? How do she and Aaeru interact with Paraietta, Rodoreamon, Floef, and Vyuraf?

What happens if due to magic or time weirdness, Mamiina is brought back? What happens between her and Neviril late in canon or post-canon? How do they see or value each other as fighters and leaders?

What's Paraietta and Rodoreamon's post-canon relationship like? They're building a life together and finding purpose in helping the war orphans, but they're also both veterans and neither of them is the other's lost love. Or I'd also love to see a during- or post-canon look at a situation where Neviril has relationships with both Paraietta and Aaeru, how she maybe needs different things from them, and how they also work together differently on the battlefield - or just a story about the relationship of Neviril and her long-loyal second-in-command Paraietta.

#dear author letters #dishonored #fma #machineries of empire #juno steel #simoun

[splenderai]

What does it feel like being aro? Because I identify as demiromantic and lately I've been wondering if I'm just full aro. Like I've had crushes before and can imagine being in love but like actually being with someone??? Wouldn't know what to do or anything. Or am I just being paranoid because never in my 20+ years have I had a relationship?

Hello, anon ! This got very long (I apologize in advance !), so I'll be putting this under a read more.

It's... different.

You often feel alienated from everyone else. Everyone outside of the aro spectrum (alloromantics), whether they're straight, gay, bi, pan, or any other identity, experiences romantic attraction and can, on some level, relate to other alloromantics (the shared desire to fall in love, go on dates, maybe get married, etc.) That's not exactly the case for us aros. While some of us are okay with and can appreciate romance in theory, that's not true for all aros. Some have varying levels of repulsion towards romance. For me, I don't usually mind the idea of romantic relationships, but I'm repulsed by even the mere thought of being in one myself. I feel physically ill and uncomfortable at the thought of someone being interested in me in that way, and my mind completely blocks out the idea of me being in a romantic relationship with all the fixings. It's a complicated relationship with romance. While I can enthusiastically talk about, say, a couple in a series I'm watching and share that excitement with another fan, or I can feel real joy about a friend getting into a relationship and listen with interest about what that relationship is like, I can also be really repulsed with certain discussions of romance and struggle to understand certain kinds of relationships that are just not logical to me (like people who date who aren't friends or people who say they fall in love after a week of knowing someone). Society also puts a huge emphasis on romance and makes it seem like such an enormous and important part of your life. People around you are always talking about it starting from a young age. Television shows, movies, and other types of media are oversaturated with romantic plotlines. (As a result, representation for us in mainstream media is practically non-existent.) Romantic relationships are even placed on a pedestal and viewed by some as being more valuable and just overall better than platonic ones. None of it makes sense, and you feel a real disconnect from all these ideas and feelings that are just natural and commonplace to just about everyone around you.

It's tiring. Amatonormativity also leads to a lot of negativity and ridicule directed at single individuals. You're seen as immature if you've never dated before, and even in middle and high school kids will make fun of you if you've never had a significant other. If you're not married by the age of 35, people will assume you're undesirable, have a terrible personality, or something else of the sort. It's always assumed that there is a problem with you. A person who wants to live on your own with a pet makes you the Crazy Cat Lady who is someone you should avoid or never become yourself. When you try to tell others that you don't experience romantic attraction, they might say you sound ridiculous, that you just haven't found the right person yet (or worse, they might even see it as a challenge and try to pursue a relationship with you), that (especially if you're cis aroace or cis aro and heterosexual) you're just making it up so that you can feel special and weasel your way into the lgbtq+ community where you don't belong.

It's scary sometimes. Society tries to hammer into you (starting from a very young age) the idea that you're meant to find the love of your life with whom you'll spend the rest of your days. You'll have your 2.4 kids and spouse by your side, so you won't die alone. It's almost like there's this guidebook for the future, and yet you find yourself flipping through the pages trying to find the chapter or even just a footnote about people like us and what we can expect. Society tells us we'll be forever alone. Yeah, you have your friends, but they're likely alloromantics and at some point they'll be too tied up with their nuclear families or romantic partner(s) to fill that lonely void you'll have. Society doesn't have a positive outlook for people like us, so we have to forge our own paths.

There's usually a lot of inner struggle involved. Because of society's emphasis on romance and amatonormativity, there can be some internalized arophobia that some of us struggle with. Plus, a lot of us don't learn about aspec identities until later on in life, so we've spent many hours, days, even years distraught because we were under the impression that there must have been something wrong with us. I only found out about aromanticism and asexuality when I was in university, so I had my fair share of years where I just couldn't understand why I was so different from my friends, the people on TV, and all the others around me. I know some aros who would have panic attacks because they thought that they'd inevitably have to get into a relationship, have kids, and so on because they were led to believe that there was no alternative or that it'd be even scarier to live alone for the rest of their lives. A few of my aro friends and I (and I would think a lot of other aros) have talked about how we're all almost always going through these bouts where we doubt whether or not we're actually aro. It's really hard to know if you're outright lacking romantic attraction or if those people are right and you're just a late bloomer or haven't found the right person yet. Like I could be demiromantic ? I can't really be sure, so there are times where I think I'm feeling something, and I have a crisis because it could be romantic attraction ? Or maybe it's just indigestion ?  I've also gone 20+ years without being in a relationship, so I can understand your concern there. Unfortunately, there is no easy answer.

It's a lot.

But it's also really liberating and something that a lot of us are very proud of.

When you're able to climb past the internalized arophobia and learn that you can absolutely live a very fulfilling and happy life without being in a romantic relationship, you really start to see life through a new lens and have a much more positive outlook on the future. There is nothing wrong with wanting to live alone, with a pet, with a close friend or friends (this is especially important !!! it's often looked down upon and people will insist that there must be something going on between two friends living together but that doesn't have to be the case !!!). All of these are options available to you. You're never truly alone, either. A lot of us have really great relationships with our friends and family (blood or found), in part because we don't put romantic relationships on a pedestal and tend to spend more time with them since we're just not involved in romance. There are interest groups out there (both locally and long distance like on the internet) that you can join to meet new people and do or talk about something you really enjoy (ex. a dnd group that meets weekly). Maybe even get to know your coworkers ! In most cases, you see them eight hours a week, five days a week, and it can be nice learning about these familiar faces (some of my closest friends have been current or former coworkers). There are communal housing initiatives out there where you can have your own space, but you are also surrounded by neighbors (similar to dorm life in university). You want kids but don't want to have a romantic partner or spouse ? You can adopt and coparent with a close friend ! There are so many possibilities out there, and I hope that one day they will become more accepted and even commonplace in society.

It's a lot to consider, and these are only my own experiences and those of my friends and others that I've read about over the years. The best way to figure out whether or not you're aro is to talk to other aros, read the accounts of other aros to see what their own concerns, experiences, and thoughts are on their own identity, and read through some helpful resources on aromanticism ! This blog is a really nice place to start, and this is also a really great resource (that I found on the aforementioned blog). If you're still unsure, that's totally valid and understandable ! If you feel more comfortable using the aromantic label in the meantime, that's absolutely okay, too ! Just like with sexuality, romantic attraction can be fluid, too. If the you today feels closer to aromantic than demiromantic, then you can identify as such. If you realize that you are demiromantic or even something else later on down the road, that's also okay ! You're just as valid either way. Remember that, anon. It's okay to be aro, it's okay to be arospec, and it's okay if that changes down the road. At the end of the day, you're you !

#i hope this helps out in some way anon ! #i ended up rambling a lot... #thank you for the ask and please feel free to reach out if you have more questions or want to talk more about this ! #asks with min