#these people have no fucking clue what they’re talking about

[transmascissues]

I love you lifelong vaginal atrophy

i love you topical estrogen that treats atrophy and doesn’t interfere with testosterone at all. i love you modern medicine that makes safe and harmless transitions possible. i love you health professionals who explained the risks of taking testosterone to me calmly and told me exactly how we would respond to each one if they ever became an issue because they’re not scary or unmanageable if you have good, competent people on your side.

i hate you terf rhetoric that completely ignores the actual reality of testosterone hrt in favor of portraying it as poison. i hate you transphobes who try to make me scared of the medication that gave me my life back.

#these people have no fucking clue what they’re talking about #and anyway. you think atrophy would be the worst of my lifelong health conditions? #these people will be like ‘you’ll be a lifelong medical patient!!!’ okay??? im a fucking cripple i already am #anon hate #examples of transandrophobia #transandrophobia #transandromisia #transmisandry #virilphobia #virilmisia #anti transmasculinity #transmascphobia #trans men #transmascs

[designernishiki]

You asked for a fic rec so I’ll toss this one at ya: https://archiveofourown.org/works/46767358?view_full_work=true Stick through the formatting for the characterization, tone, and really the whole vibe of this fic. I haven’t been able to get the bathroom call between Daigo and Majima out of my head for weeks since I read it with how naturally it all flows. My own little Daigo characterization booklet to review when I feel like I need a refresher on him.

so I may have stayed up until 6am reading this (would’ve slept earlier but I couldn’t stop reading it) and hgggahaghhhhaggahshhhhhhhh that was one of the most well-characterized fics I’ve ever read what the fuck. like the differences in how each character speaks (both tone-wise and in differing levels of authenticity) and how they speak to specific others (the daigo and majima dyanmic specifically- how they actually take into account how long they’ve been working really closely- SO good), the mental anguish and chaos vs the overwhelming emptiness of being daigo dojima but no longer The 6th Chairman Daigo Dojima……….I could keep going but I think you get it.

tbh I’d been wanting to write something exploring a similar set of dynamics/situation (post-kiryu’s fake death, interactions with haruka, daigo, and/or majima specifically, reflecting on his shortcomings while acknowledging the heavy Grief left behind) but now I’m like. well I still could but this was so well written in regards to daigo and haruka that, as far as something between those two goes, I don’t feel the need to.

thanks for the recommendation! my brain is broken now (affectionate)

#rambling #fics #fic rec #there’s a little bit of minedai in there via flashback but I don’t know if im gonna put this in my minedai tag cause it’s really #not tecccchnically a minedai fic. it’s just. a daigo-centric fic/study more than anything #my favorite more lighthearted moment in this story is daigo talking to haruka in Okinawa after like 3 years and hearing about her #‘situationship’ with yuta and how it’s just more convenient to tell people they’re a legit couple and daigo’s immediate response on impulse #is just. ‘that must be nice. I mean that you can do that. if it were two guys or two girls or something you wouldn’t be able to do that.’ #or something like that and simultaneously sweating because he has no fucking idea why he’s saying that and can’t find a way to abort #my only critique is that I was hoping he’d come out to her (probably on the scene after that where it’s just them sitting on the deck) #and it wouldn’t even have to be a Big Thing it’s just. it felt like it was leading up to that (whether coming out on purpose or on accident) #but ah well #don’t get me wrong I think she could probably figure it out on her own based on the fact that daigo’s never had a girlfriend to her #knowledge and is in his 40s + that weird little gay tangent he went on earlier out of the blue #if anyone could pick it up though context clues and hints it’d be haruka and akiyama The Investigators. and oh no. looks like that’s #exactly who he’s stuck with #id love to see an update cause of this oh mannnn #(if anyone could pick it up it’d be those two + also majima but I kinda figured at this point majima would almost certainly already know #they seem like they have a mutual (possibly unspoken) recognition of one another on that front. based a little on what daigo says about #‘when kiryu says jump you say how high’ and majima floundering a little before admitting ‘you know I can’t resist those big #brown puppydog eyes…’ like i know that’s not too on the nose but it’s enough of a casual acknowledgement to Me that it feels… idk it just #feels like they Know. it just makes sense. and I hope they do cause it’d feel a little less lonely and terrifying to be gay in that world if #that were the case. yet another thing making it feel like majima’s a way more viable parent figure to him than kiryu fr fr…… #anyway I could keep going forever so I should probably stop #I’ve never considered how daigo would interact with akiyama and now they’ve got me intrigued. I really hope they update this with something #daigo #I really think a chunk of this fanbase (particularly The Queers) understand daigo as a character better than rgg studio does. and cares more

[katierosefun]

the last of us seems like an excellent show but i fear i can’t watch it bc tell me why i watched the first 30 minutes of episode 1 last night and then immediately had the most fucked up zombie dreams

#caroline talks #weird ass mashup of the last of us and the boys #where i was with the boys #but then butcher fucking VANISHED so I have no FUCKING clue what he was doing #ily frenchie and kimiko the only two who rushed back for me #and then weirdly i had this super power where like? if i concentrated hard enough? i could tell the runners to? stop and go away? #but I don’t think I was me I think I was someone else #bc my dream had a weird? flashback sequence? where I was this little kid #and this stern faced lady was watching me control a group of runners #anyways flash forward to the present and I’m #at this facility and I’m training with a bunch of ? kids? teens? #and they’re joking about how ‘ohhh look i’m a clicker haha’ #and then two of the kids go down to the basement and i follow them #of course they freeze and i look and there are a bunch of runners down there #so I do my thing and slowly draw them out of the basement and towards the exit of the facility #when a bunch of other people in the facility #start to think this means omg the runners are normal now! #and start to grab their kids and leave and I was gesturing for the others to keep those idiots AWAY like NOOO they’re not safe! #but ofc no one was listening and for some fucking reason STAN EDGAR IS THERE #and Stan Edgar just pleasantly smiles and lets those idiotic parents leave #and he’s just like ‘there’s nothing you can do for them now’ #anyways. we close the gates and i stare at the windows and butcher (finally back ig?) tells me to not look at the windows #which is very ooc of him on my dream I think but man. #oh and then my dream has another flashback sequence #of a little girl and her brother grocery shopping with their mom #and in the checkout line the mom starts to show signs of being infected #but only the brother knows #and the sister figures it out too and she can’t look at her mom #and they all follow the mom to the car and sit in the backseat #and the girl just quietly cries and JESUSSSSS YEAH SORRY BESTIES the last of us seems great but uhhhh NIGHTMARES

[two-out-of-three]

love seeing posts tagged as ‘succession spoilers’ lol bestie thank you but I could not piece together what the fuck is going on if I tried

#I don’t even go here #I just follow a lot of people who post about succession #and I love that for them #I just have no fucking clue what they’re ever talking about #sounds sad though #succession #my post

[writtenbymoonflower]

Hello, author-san! How are you? Could I please request some angst for the poly!marauders, where R is someone full of tattoos or piercings but is smart, a sweetheart, golden retriever coded, and Lily is their friend. Lily knows about their infatuation with the boys. Being a great friend, Lily wants to set them up, but they're a bit uncertain about R because of their tattoos. Then one night, R overhears them talking in the common room with Lily and voices out their opinions regarding R, causing R to become insecure and try to hide it. You can continue however you like! Angst with a happy ending if it's okay! 🥺

Thank you, author-san!

💀🌻

Thanks for requesting sweetheart! Sorry it took so long, hope this is okay! gn!reader x poly!marauders, pre-relationship

cw: prejudice associated with tattoos and piercings, swearing, angst to happy ending

1.8k words (oopsie)

It was like you could hear their words on repeat as you raced up the stairs. What hurt the most is that you knew that some people would judge, but you hadn’t expected it from them. 

“I just don’t know about 'em, Lils.” James winced. “Like they seem nice, but you know about people who choose to look at that…” He trailed off. 

“I’m sure they’re not all bad.” Sirius cut in, clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. “But Prongs does have a point.”

“It’s just the impulsivity of it all.” Remus reasoned. “Like if you’re making rash choices like that, what else would you do.” 

That was when you left your hiding spot in the stairs and ran back to your dorm. You could hear Lily’s ‘I’m so fucking done with you being stupid’ voice as you trailed away, making you smile at the knowledge that you had such a good friend. 

But you had heard enough. They had clearly made their minds up about you. Besides, you knew your appearance was an… acquired taste, to say the least, and you couldn’t expect them to be with someone they weren’t attracted to. You didn’t think you looked that odd, but maybe your perception was skewed. No matter whose perception was more accurate, they clearly didn’t particularly like you, and it was probably best to keep your distance for now, at least until they really got to know you. 

You knew that your appearance didn’t really match your personality. People often assumed you were rude, a slacker, confrontational, or even hateful. But the opposite was true in fact. You always made good marks, you were friends with loads of people, always trying to be as open as possible. And yeah, some people were intimidated at first, but they usually warmed up very quickly. 

Apparently those three, the three you wanted the approval of the most, had not been as warm about you as you thought. 

You crawled into bed and curled into yourself, trying to get a few hours of sleep before breakfast. 

James yawned loudly, blinking his eyes rapidly to get rid of the sleepy, fuzzy film coating them. Him and his boyfriends had been up all night, getting lectured literally until the sun came up. 

He had to admit, it was for the best. All three boys had gone to bed, feeling thoroughly corrected. Even slipping into shame. 

“What the hell is wrong with you three?” Lily whisper-yelled. “James, you are the LAST person to say anything about appearances. Remember when I had to go around convincing people you hadn’t become mean after your growth spurt in fourth year? Just because you were big and scary and you hadn’t realized how you were coming across?” She scolded, before turning her head to the mouse-haired boy sitting by the fire. “And you,” She seethed. “You have no clue if her choices were ‘rash’ or not. I’ve heard plenty of rumors about your appearance, people saying similar things about you. About your ‘aggression’ just because they don’t know what’s going on with you.” She snapped her head over to Sirius, her fiery hair flipping around from the movement. “And Sirius, you’re just overcompensating because you’re jealous! You’re not fooling anyone, you would look like that in an instant if you could. You’re just too scared to do it.”

Sirius played with his thumbs, not able to dispute the accusations. None of the boys could actually. Lily could tell, she was satisfied with her work. 

“I love you three buggers,” She pressed a friendly kiss to each of their cheeks as she stormed upstairs. “You just need to stop being such idiots.” 

Sirius didn’t think anyone could change personalities that fast, but it seemed all three boys had woken up different people. That morning they had all just nodded to each other, acknowledging that their opinions were very different than they had been 24 hours ago and all walked shamefacedly down to breakfast. Sirius kept pushing his eggs around his plate, too busy staring at you to take a bite. You looked a lot different today. Your hair was ruffled in front of your face, hiding the metal glinting on your nose and eyebrow. You also had long sleeves and pants on, covering the ink detailing your skin. You still hadn’t waved at them, or even acknowledged the boys’ existence. Usually, you would be bouncing over to them, talking about the weather or whatever was on your mind at the moment. Sirius missed it if he was honest with himself. He was disappointed, he had been excited to show you his outfit. He crafted it with you in mind, teasing his hair up extra and being a bit more outlandish with his top, even stealing Marlene’s varnish to paint his nails. 

Remus missed your interest in the latest book he had read. You always had so many interesting questions and you listened so intently. He missed how you played with the hoop in your septum as you nodded along to his plot summaries. You were always so patient and careful, it made his heart crack. 

James was equally distraught. He had always prided himself on being open and friends with everyone, and he had considered you his friend, which just made him feel worse. He knew that stereotyping people never led to anything good, especially when someone's personality was completely ignored and replaced with caricature. Yes, you did look intimidating, but he actually liked it. It accentuated how soft your personality actually was. You were like a big dog that everyone was terrified of, but in reality was scared of butterflies and just wanted to love everyone. He laughed sadly, catching the other two boys' attention as he stared longingly at you. All he wanted to do was go over there, but you were completely ignoring them, so he figured it was best to just not bother you and continue on with his breakfast. 

You were being equally as forlorn, continually sneaking glances over at the boys. They looked quiet and tired, but no less handsome. You felt sick, moving to leave your breakfast and all but run to the library. You needed to study anyway, you had become so infatuated that you were ignoring your classes. You had barely made it down the corridor before you heard three sets of panicked footsteps, quickly catching up to you. You tried to walk faster, but unfortunately Remus had very long legs and he briskly made it in front of you, trapping you in. He was looking flushed, amber eyes focusing on you way too much for comfort. 

“Y/N,” He sounded out of breath. You fixed your face down and back, away from their gaze. You stopping had allowed the other two the opportunity to catch up, and soon you were face-to-face with all three of the people who apparently disliked you, but to your dismay, you were still completely attached to. 

“You guys okay?” You asked, as kindly as ever but far quieter than they were used to. 

“We’re fine, lovely.” James said, confused. “Are you okay?”

“I’m good.” You muttered, shifting your feet. 

“Babe,” Sirius scoffed. Your heart jumped at the honorific, but you quickly scolded yourself. Sirius just called everyone that. You had heard what he, what all three of them had said last night. “You ran from there like bat outta’ hell.” He said like you were being ridiculous.

“And you haven’t spoken to us all day.” Remus cut in before you could respond. 

“It’s only seven.” You mumbled.

“Still odd.” James quipped, moving ever so slightly closer to you. “You’re not okay.” He said, with enough finality that you gave up the act all together. They really weren’t going to make this easy on you. They said all those things last night, but they were still going to put you through the misery of having to listen to them say all those things directly to you. 

You sighed dejectedly, starting to pick your nails. “Look okay,” You tore the words from the back of your throat. “I know that you don’t like me or don’t think I’m nice or whatever. You don’t have to talk to me, it’s okay.” You did your best to give them a reassuring smile, even managing for water to stay out of your eyes, but their expressions didn’t make it easy. Sirius cursed and pinched the bridge of his nose, James looked like a kicked puppy, and Remus was hiding his eyes from you. You started to walk away, but you were blocked in.

“Shit, you heard last night?” Sirius winced. You nodded painfully, looking back down at your shoes. The silent tension was so thick you felt it suffocating you. James was the first to do anything, wordlessly striding over to pull you into a bone-crushing hug. You stumbled from the shock, easing into him accidentally, but you made no moves to tense away. You limply wrapped your arms around his waist. 

“I’m so sorry, angel.” He said, panicked. “I was so stupid, I- I never should’ve said it I don’t know what I was even thinking.” He pulled you tighter to him, enough that you were worried of your feet leaving the ground. 

“I’m sorry too.” Sirius said, much more morosely than usual. “Never should’ve said those things, and you never should've heard it either.” 

“We’re all sorry.” Remus said firmly. “We all know better, we should’ve known not to think that way. It’s awfully closed-minded. You’re our friend, we should’ve acted like it.” 

“It’s okay.” You squeezed out. 

“No.” Sirius said sharply. “It’s not okay. I don’t know if you heard what Lily said back, but she pointed out a lot of things, and I can promise that we don’t think that way anymore.” 

“Please, please forgive us, baby. We were so wrong. You’re so kind and smart and funny and gorgeous an-” James was rambling on and on. 

“Jamie, it’s okay. I know you’re sorry.” You giggled at his panicked tone. “Can you uh- you’re kinda crushing me.” 

“Shit! Sorry.” He released you quickly, but not before slicking your hair out of your face. You just laughed, feeling ten times lighter. 

“We’re okay.” You reassured. “I forgive you all, it hurt, but it seems like you are all beating yourselves up enough.”

“Jus’ feel bad.” Remus grabbed you unexpectedly, tugging you into his arms. He wasn’t squeezing you like James, but rather greedily absorbing your touch. This felt like a big deal, you almost never saw Remus hold anyone. 

“Don’t feel bad.” You pleaded. “Everything’s fine now.” You rubbed his back in a way you hoped was soothing. You felt him relax in your arms. 

“Okay stop hogging them.” Sirius tugged Remus out of the way, making him grunt in dissatisfaction. (You pretended to not notice the sneaky kiss Sirius pressed to the taller boy’s knuckles.) “It’s my turn.” He grabbed you with loving aggression. 

“I wasn’t hogging.” Remus quipped. 

“Yeah, you were.” Sirius sassed. “Besides, I was the biggest idiot. I need to give the biggest cwtch.” His reasoning was flawed, but you settled into him nonetheless. 

#poly!marauders x reader #poly!marauders x you #poly!marauders fluff #poly!marauders angst #marauders #marauders fanfiction #poly!marauders #drabble #marauders fandom #james potter #sirius black #remus lupin #marauders era #the marauders #the maruaders #the marauders era #james potter x reader #sirius black x reader #remus lupin x reader #oneshot #angst #angst with a happy ending #anon ask #anon request

[hoonieshoney]

🔪Synopsis: Four university students have been murdered by a Ghostface killer. With the murders getting more vicious and frequent, you and your best friend Jungwon decide to spend the weekend indoors. He insists you stay over at his apartment with him and his two roommates;you would just be safer there.

🔪Pairing: Ghostface!Heeseung x Female!Reader x Ghostface!Sunghoon

🔪Warnings: DARK CONTENT. Violence, murder, descriptions of the murders, slight knife play, blood, slight blood play, dub con/non con, yandere, degradation, threesome, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), p in v, oral (m+f), face fucking, choking, cum eating, size kink, slapping, spit, creampie, breeding kink, angst, kidnapping, drugging, mentions of alcohol, cursing

🔪Word Count: 11k+

Author Note: Ahh!! It’s here, thank you for being here! This isn’t 100% proofread so there might be a few grammar mistakes. I posted a preview of this fic, but I added a few details to this final version so if you read the preview this final piece has just a few slight additions to it! I hope you enjoy it and please like/reblog/comment, I’d really appreciate it. Love you little ducklings! 

"There’s always two," Jungwon mumbled, watching the reporters swarm the Dean.

There was another murder Friday night. Still no leads, no clues, just a sighting of someone in a Ghostface mask.

You looked up from your textbook and saw his weary face staring in the direction of the press conference. You were supposed to spend the morning with your best friend Jungwon prepping for an English midterm. But his focus is on the media circus that’s invaded the University campus.

"Two what?" You asked highlighting a sentence from your textbook.

"Two killers. The reporters keep saying the murders have similarities to the Scream movies but no one is talking about how there’s always two Ghostface killers in the end." He sighed, picking at the dry skin around his fingernails.

After 10 years of friendship it was always easy to tell when he was nervous, he always fiddled with his fingers and chewed holes into his bottom lip. You put your highlighter down and gently grabbed his hand to distract him from his nervous picking.

"Not necessarily", you shrugged. "The third movie only had one killer." you smiled trying to joke but his worried expression didn’t falter. He just rolled his eyes and swatted your hand away from his.

Damn, he really is nervous. You had only seen Jungwon this rattled with nerves after his parents divorce when you were kids. That was also around the time your friendship really bloomed into a type of dependency on each other. You hadn’t left each other's side for more than two days at a time, switching classes to match schedules in highschool and now you were at the same University together. Platonic soulmates you two always say. 

"Why are you so worried Won? If this is really like those movies we are safe! The killers always targeted one friend group and not to be super insensitive but the people that have been murdered weren't our friends."

He looked at you while he chewed his bottom lip watching you as you spoke. "Wonnie, we don’t go to those parties and we aren't friends with people that do. We’ll be okay."

You grabbed his hand again, rubbing circles on his palm to help ground his nerves. Skinship always calmed him down. The situation was scary, but you weren’t worried. You just assumed this was some copycat psycho trying to be famous. And besides, the first two murders took place at frat parties, the third one was after a football game, and the recent one was at make out point. Places you or Jungwon don’t frequent.

"But isn’t it kind of weird?" he asked, scooting closer to you. He looked around making sure no one was in an ear shot of your conversation. Before bringing his face closer to yours and staring into your eyes.

"Keeho, Mark, Yeji, and Winter were all murdered."

"Yeah and? What’s weird about that? They’re all in the same friend group like I said." You tried to focus your attention back on your textbook ignoring the loud yelling from the reporters signaling the press conference had begun.

"The same friend group that has been tormenting us since day one of university." He said shutting your textbook and turning your body to face him fully. He grabbed your hands and held them in his, he wanted you to take him seriously. 

That was true. Those four were pretty notorious for having a mean streak. But it wasn’t just targeted at you and Won. Lots of people were constantly on the end of their mean words and cruel jokes. They were the typical rich kids who thought their parents' money made them better than everyone else, partying and drinking every weekend, with the mindset that rules didn’t apply to them. 

"They tormented lots of people Won, stop overthinking or you’ll get stress wrinkles." You mused, smoothing his brown hair down and kissing the tip of his nose. He smiled showing off the dimples you loved so much. He bumped his forehead against yours, "I’m just saying,"

He looked back at the reporters as they started to talk about what they knew about the latest murder victim that happened over the weekend, Keeho.

"I hope no one we know is Sydney fucking Prescott in this scenario." 

“Don’t worry Wonnie, no one we know is that exciting.” you joked tapping his knee, “come on cutie, we’ll be late for class.” Standing up from the courtyard table you stuffed your work into your backpack and extended your hand out for Jungwon to take. 

“As if I can focus with all this going on.” He grumbled wrapping his larger hand around yours. 

Walking into the classroom you found your usual seats next to each other and started prepping for the lecture. Out of your peripheral you saw Choi Yeonjun take the empty seat to the right of you. “Hey, bunny” A small smile gracing his pretty face and pouty lips. The cute nickname he had given you the first day you moved into your dorm. You had accidentally knocked into him with a box of your belongings causing your favorite item from home to tumble to the ground. He didn’t tease you, despite Keeho being there and making fun of you for bringing a stuffed animal to college, Yeonjun only smiled and picked up the white plush bunny from the ground and kindly offered to take the box up to your dorm for you. 

“Hey Junnie, how was your weekend?” You smiled, turning your chair to face him.

“Kind of boring actually, did you hear about Keeho?” He asked, adjusting the black rimmed glasses on his face. Such a cute nerd. 

“Of course, everyones talking about it.” They news said they found him hanging from a tree limb in the woods behind the campus at a known make out spot. He was supposedly disemboweled like Drew Barrymore’s character in the first Scream movie. He was a jerk, but no one deserves to die like that. How can someone even stomach doing something like that? 

“Yeah..my little brother Gyu tried to tell him not to go out alone so late at night but he was too egotistical to listen.” He sighed leaning back in chair. Gyu and Keeho were best friends from what you heard, which was odd considering how many times Keeho stole Yeonjun’s glasses and tripped him in the halls.

“He’s always been one to do..whatever he wants.” You say trying not to come off a little bitter at the end. He chuckled softly, knowing what you were trying not to say. “He was an asshole, it's okay to say it.” He mused nudging your arm playfully. You cracked a soft smile, “no comment.”

He smiled and scooted his chair closer to yours. You spent the last few weeks since the ‘bunny’ incident getting closer to Yeonjun. You had a few study sessions together, and texted each other everyday. He was an absolute sweetheart and never made you feel uncomfortable. He was also incredibly shy, the one time his hand accidentally brushed against your thigh he couldn’t even look you in the eye. He was a blushing stuttering mess the rest of the study date. 

“So I was thinking..maybe we could hang out this weekend. We could, you know...go out Friday night?”

Younjun’s cheeks were tinted pink and he was fiddling with his fingers in his lap avoiding looking into your eyes. He was afraid your answer would be no, or even worse you would laugh straight in his face. 

Jungwon scoffed and mumbled something under his breath, his face never leaving his laptop as he overheard the conversation. You mentally reminded yourself to kick him for that later. Jungwon was definitely the protective brother figure in your life, no guy was ever good enough for you according to him. He took care of you after too many loser guys broke your heart, and he didn’t want that happening again. 

“Oh? What would we do?” leaning toward him propping your elbow on the table and resting your chin in the palm of your hand staring at him playfully. “We can keep it classic? Dinner, movie, and see where the night takes us.” He smiled, “but we can do whatever you want. I’d be fine with whatever you decide Bunny.”  

You scooted your chair closer to him and grabbed his fiddling hands the same way you do for Jungwon. You were close enough to smell his cologne and see the cute beauty mark he had under his right eye beneath his glasses, it was making you dizzy. He was so undeniably cute. “Well..”

Professor Jang walked in and started his usual morning greeting. You pulled apart from each other, dropping his hand, you straighten your chair to put you back facing the front of the classroom.

“I get to pick the movie.” you whispered to Junnie keeping your eyes facing to the front of the classroom. You saw the grin spread on his face out of the corner of your eye, “of course bunny.” 

“You shouldn’t be alone with him..” Jungwon whispered as you left class waving bye to Yeonjun. “Why not? Junnie’s a sweetheart, and your bestie is in a dry spell.” You wiggled your eyebrows suggestively. He wrinkled his nose and laughed, “TMI..but seriously. With Ghostface running around killing people, it's not a good idea.” He was shaking his head. “I mean, what if he is the one...”

“Won, don’t finish that sentence. Yeonjun is a sweetheart, he could never do anything like that..” you huff growing slightly annoyed at what he was insinuating. How could he even think that? Yeonjun wouldn’t even step on the flowers outside, much less butcher someone.  He picked up on the shift in your demeanor quickly, he didn’t want to upset you but he doesn’t trust anyone right now, especially with you. 

“I’m sorry babe..I just don’t think it's safe.” He opens the exit door for you letting you walk out first. “I don’t want you mad at me Y/N, it’s just..I couldn’t live without you.” You stop walking at his soft voice and sighed. You wrap your arms around your best friend's waist, “I couldn’t live without you either, Wonnie.”

He rests his chin atop your head and hugs you back. He wasn’t trying to sabotage your potential new relationship, he just didn’t trust your safety in the hands of someone who couldn’t even throw a punch. Jungwon wasn’t a fighter himself but he’s never been afraid to get his knuckles bloody for you. He’s done it four times. 

 “I just want you to be safe.” He whispers in your hairline. You nod understanding his reasoning, you pull away to look up at him, “I’ll take your concerns into consideration Wonnie, but I really like Yeonjun..” He sighed and ruffled your hair, “I know. You have that dopey lovesick grin on your face everytime you see him.”

“I DO NOT!” You very much do. 

Thursday morning was only good for one thing, treating yourself to pastries and lattes before an obnoxiously early history class with Jungwon. Whoever decided to teach history at seven thirty am was a menace. But these early morning meetings with Wonnie at seven am to eat sugary foods and get loaded on caffeine were moments you wouldn’t trade for the world.

When you arrive at the coffee house he’s already sitting at your usual table with his nose buried in his book when you arrive. Your usual latte waiting for you as well as three chocolate chip scones to share. “Good morning sunshine!” He beams as you sit down across from him. “Way too early for all your energy Wonnie..” you grumbled drinking the warm latte. He just smiled knowing this sleepy version of you all too well. 

“HE DID IT AGAIN! GHOSTFACE KILLED AGAIN” a loud yell startles you. Looking out the large window, students are running out of the science lab across the courtyard screaming. Panic started filling the coffee house, not knowing what the man that yelled meant, people started to assume Ghostface must be lingering around.

Jungwon stood up quickly and grabbed you by pulling you to him, backing you against the nearest wall, “people are panicking and you could get hurt.” 

He was right, people were running around and knocking into each other to get out of the shop. The small courtyard outside was a mess of students running and crying. Police cars and ambulances were speeding in and the loud sirens only added to the loud chaos. “Do you think he's here..” you asked, watching the scene of chaos unfold in front of you. “I-I don’t know..fuck..let’s get out of here, before it gets worse.”

He wraps his arm around your waist pulling you with him, you both leave the coffee house, “let’s go back to your dorm it's closer.” He’s pulling you tightly against him maneuvering you both around the mass of running students. 

“Y/N!!” 

You snap your head to the familiar voice of your roommate Jen. “Wonnie wait, it’s Jen.” You stop him from walking and point to your roommate running toward you. She stumbles in front of you both, crying as she throws her arms around you. You catch her and look at Won giving him a look signaling you weren’t sure what to do. Jungwon wrapped his other arm around her and moved you both away from the center of the courtyard. He dragged you two behind the coffee house to let her catch her breath. 

She looked at him and cried into his chest, “I saw-I saw the room..there was so mu-much b-blood..who could do this..” she was sobbing as Wonnie held her tighter, shushing her softly to try and soothe her. 

“What do you mean..What happened Jen..” You latch onto her side to help comfort her. Jen also had an early class on Thursday, Chemistry. The building everyone was running and screaming out of was the same building your roommate was in.

“The professor found him in the science lab..his throat was slit..they said he was ne-nearly decapitated..and st-stabbed..as if it's not horrible enough to almost decapitate him but to stab him over and over..”She sobbed harder against Jungwon. 

“D-did you see the body Jen..”you asked, rubbing her back. 

“I didn’t see the body..but there was so much blood Y/N..so much of it..it covered the whole room..” Her eyes were frantic and she couldn’t focus, it was as if she was searching for the killer around you three. 

“Do you know who it was?” you ask, brushing the hair stuck to her wet cheeks away from her face. She was quiet and gripped Jungwon’s shirt tighter and tried to ground herself. “Jen?..” Her face was apprehensive and she swallowed hard before grabbing your hand. 

“Yeonjun..” she whispered looking at you knowing the pain it was about to cause you.

Jungwon tenses up and you could see the color leave his face as he looked at you. The tears started to pour out of you before your brain could process what Jen just said. There was a loud ringing in your ears, and it felt like everything around you froze for just a split second. 

Choi Yeonjun..was..dead…?

Your breaths became shallow as you started to sink to the floor unable to hold your weight.

“Whoa, baby breathe..you’re okay. I’m here and you’re safe..breathe baby..” Jungwon gently detached from Jen and caught you in his arms before your knees hit the gravel.

He grabbed your hand and placed it on his chest, “match my breathing baby, come on. You’ll make yourself vomit if you keep crying like this.”

You hadn’t realized how hard you were sobbing, hiccuping as you struggled to breathe. You just saw Junnie yesterday..and now..now he's gone? Just like that? No goodbye..no final hug..no more comforting smells of his cedarwood cologne..he was dead. Someone murdered him..he must have been so scared..Junnie…

You clung harder to Jungwon, he let you break down in his arms. Your loud wailing hitting straight to his heart, he knew how much you liked Yeonjun, it‘s killing him to see you this way. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen you cry this hard before, and it terrifies him. Jen slumped against the wall covering her face with her hands, she couldn’t handle your wails only making her sob harder. 

Jungwon let you both cry for a few more minutes before deciding he needed to get you both away from this mess. Being around here would make it worse, not to mention the large van labeled ‘Coroner’ was just arriving on the scene. He couldn’t let you see Yeonjun get taken away in a body bag. “Come on, let's get you guys back to your dorm. You both need some space away from here.” 

He helped you up and grabbed Jen’s hand and led you away keeping your back turned away from the scene. He supported both of your weights as he walked you to your shared dorm, which thankfully was only half a block away. He watched you struggle to keep your composure for a few minutes before deciding to send Jen ahead to open the room. He lifted you carefully into his arms and carried you the rest of the way back to your room. 

He placed you on your small twin size bed, taking your shoes off and wrapping you in one of your soft blankets. Your sobs died down, but your tears never stopped. You were barely blinking and it scared the fuck out of him. You looked broken. He kissed your forehead. “Take a nap baby, I’ll stay with you..you need to sleep. Your body needs to rest, I’ll be here when you wake up.” He stayed repeating soft words to you, running his fingers through your hair. Your little whines and hiccups dying down as you let the mental exhaustion take over. 

This was a nightmare. 

You heard soft movements and whispers breaking your dream state. Opening your swollen eyes you adjust to your surroundings. You slept the entire day away, seeing the sun already starting to set from your window. The reality hitting you again of what happened a few hours prior.

This wasn’t a nightmare and Yeonjun really was gone.

You looked around the room and saw Jungwon was packing your duffle bag and Jen was on her side of the room packing a suitcase. “What’s going on?” Your voice is sore and hoarse. You sit up from your bed confused. 

“I can’t..I can’t stay here. I want to see my mom..I need to get away from here for a few days.” Jen whispered, zipping her suitcase shut. She looked at you sadly, she didn’t want to leave you in your state but she couldn’t stay. She couldn’t even take care of herself right now.

You nod understanding, “yeah, you should go.” Even though it pained you. It was selfish of you to want her to stay, you knew she saw the mess of the crime scene and she needed to get far away from this fucking University. 

“I’m not leaving you here alone..you’re staying with me until Jen comes back.” Jungwon smiled softly while packing your favorite sweater. What? You shook your head and frowned. “Won you have roommates, I don’t think they want some girl crashing at their place..”

“Heeseung and Sunghoon are fine with it, I called them while you were sleeping. And you're not some girl, you're my best friend” He cut you off while grabbing your toiletry bag and shoving it in the duffle and zipping it shut. He grabbed your sneakers and sat on the floor at the foot of your bed grabbing your legs to help put your shoes on. 

“I don't want to intrude, Wonnie..”

“You’re not an intrusion, Y/N.” He sighs, tying your shoes tightly. He rests his forehead on your knee and takes a deep breath. “I’m not taking any risks, not with you..you’re not staying here. I’ll throw you over my shoulder if I have to.” He looks up at you and his eyes are glassed over and his bottom lip is quivering. He is trying so hard to keep it together for you, but he’s terrified. 

“Go with him, Y/N..please. It’s not safe here..” Jen sniffled, grabbing her suitcase from the bed. 

You didn’t want to worry either of them unnecessarily. Maybe a change of scenery would be good. You needed space from the University and you needed to heal away from here. “Are you sure it’s safe?” 

“Y/N,we have an off campus apartment. It's safer than here, baby..” 

“Are you sure they're okay if I stay?”

“Of course, you’re always welcome.” 

“Alright, I’ll go.”

You both walked Jen to her cab, Jungwon insisting on making sure she got into it safely. You hugged her tightly. “Text me when you get there, I love you.” You mumbled into her hair. You were both lucky that housing roomed you two together, you had been inseparable since move-in day. Only having been friends for a few short weeks you had grown to love and care for her. You wanted her safe, and she needed to get out of here.

“I love you too..stay close to Jungwon until I get back.” She whispered and kissed your cheek. She parted from you with a final hand squeeze and got in her cab and shut the door. She rolled down the window, “Keep our girl safe Wonnie.” 

“With my life.” He smiled softly, waving her off. 

You watched her cab drive off and wanted to cry again. A part of you felt like she wouldn’t come back, she packed for way more than a few days. But you couldn’t blame her, you couldn’t imagine what she had seen. You only hoped this wouldn’t be goodbye and you’d be reunited with her eventually. Jungwon grabbed your hand, breaking your thoughts, “come on.”

He tossed your duffle bag into the backseat of his car and opened his passenger door for you, helping you in and even buckling your seatbelt for you. He was treating you like glass, afraid you could break at any moment. You felt like glass, all you needed was one more thing to hit you and you’d break. Maybe you should go home too, but you could never leave Jungwon behind. You were the only family he had, aside from his roommates Heeseung and Sunghoon, and you didn’t know them well.

Jungwon met the two older guys in his computer class the first week of University, all three hitting it off instantly bonding over videogames. They offered their spare room to him after finding out Jungwon was sharing a single dorm room with three guys thanks to a housing mistake.

“It's been a while since you’ve seen Heeseung and Sunghoon. Heeseung is excited, he’s making your favorite for dinner, pasta.” He smiles starting the car. “At least he likes me, Sunghoon hates me..” You murmur leaning your head against the car window. The two times you met him at Jungwon’s apartment he looked like he wanted to be anywhere else but near you. 

Sunghoon was polite, but he didn’t smile at you and he seemed tense the entire time, with his jaw clenched and eyes narrowed. And any time he did look at you he had this unreadable hard expression on his face, it was unsettling. It made you feel like he didn’t want to be around you which is why you made every excuse to not hang out at Won’s place. 

Heeseung on the other hand was a sweetheart, his big bambi like eyes caught your attention first, his infectious smile and dorky humor had you laughing all night. He was warm and inviting to be around. Also, very affectionate like Jungown, hugging you and ruffling your hair, even kissing your cheek goodnight on the way out. 

“He’s just shy, I promise he likes you. He just has to get to know you better is all” Jungwon smiled pulling out of the campus parking lot. You hummed softly and watched the traffic as Wonnie drove. You felt numb, at first you didn’t pay mind to these killings but now it was close to home..Ghostface took Yeonjun from you. It felt personal. 

Thankfully, Jungwon’s apartment was only a twenty minute drive from the dorms. He grabbed your duffle and held your hand as you walked up the steps to the door. It was a cute little complex, Jungwon definitely got lucky to live in a place like this as a first year University student. You walked into their shared apartment and nervously smiled at the two boys lounging on their couch in the living room playing a random video game on their flat screen.

“Hey Y/N! Welcome!” Heeseung stood up, pausing his game to wrap his arms around you tightly, “it’s been a while!” He was much taller than Jungwon, his body engulfed yours with his hug. It was comforting, something about Heeseung and Jungwon’s hugs felt safe. 

“Thanks for having me…” your eyes land on Sungoon who was sitting on the sofa still, manspreading, with his phone in his hand texting. “It’s nice to see you Sunghoon..” you try to break the tension with the quiet boy.  “Hey.” his voice was monotone as he shifted his eyes from his screen to you, only for a second. 

“I'm glad you’re here. The University dorms aren't safe right now.” Heeseung sighed, rubbing the sides of your arms soothingly, “I’m um..I’m really sorry to hear about your friend..” 

You tensed and met his worried gaze, tears stinging your waterline. “I have to go to the bathroom..sorry..” you mumbled, avoiding his gaze and walking to Jungwon’s room before they could see you cry. You could hear Jungwon talk to Heeseung before you shut the door. Sitting on his bed you covered your mouth with your hand and cried trying to muffle the sound of your sobs. Fuck, this hurts so bad.

You stay like that for a few minutes trying to calm yourself, you knew Heeseung meant well, but hearing it makes it real. You weren’t ready to deal with it. 

The cell phone you keep in your pocket starts to vibrate, Jen must have made it home. Pulling it out you see the UNKNOWN NUMBER flash on your screen. Maybe it’s Jen? She’s notorious for letting her phone die and was always quick to use whoever's phone that’s around her. It could be her parents phone she’s calling from. 

“Hello? Jen?”

There’s a light static sound followed by a deep distorted chuckle, “hello, Bunny.”

The nickname had Yeonjun’s face flash in your brain before feeling the uncomfortable churn in your stomach. You were shaking, you clutched the phone harder in your hand turning your knuckles white.  

“I-I think you have the wrong number.”

“Oh, Bunny, bunny, bunny. What am I going to do with you?”

You felt all the air leave your lungs and your chest felt like it was caving in. Shaking your head, you hang up the phone and throw it on Jungwon’s dresser. No fucking way. This was not happening. Was that..Ghostface? That couldn’t be Ghostface. No way. 

Replaying the distorted voice saying ‘bunny’ over and over in your head was sending you spiraling. The once sweet nickname rolling off the tongue of the boy you wanted so badly was now being tainted by a monster. Choked sobs racked your body, how many more times could you break down before it was enough to kill you? How would he know that nickname? Nobody but Yeonjun ever called you that..was someone stalking you? Why is this happening? Oh, god..were you..next? 

Panic. 

“Wonnie?! Won?!” you yell sprinting out of the bedroom. Sunghoon watches you from the same spot on the couch with furrowed eyebrows as you frantically search the apartment for your best friend. Heeseung emerges from the kitchen in an apron and a mixing bowl full of salad in hand, “are you okay, Y/N?” 

“Yeah, you look like you’ve seen a ghost..” Sunghoon says, cocking his head to the side with a small humorless smile. Wait..what? 

Jungwon walks into the apartment holding an empty laundry basket, "what's going on?" he asks as he sees your worried expression. He must have been in the laundry room. You run to him and wrap your arms around him tightly making him drop the basket, “please don’t leave me alone..” you softly beg still crying.

“Never baby, what’s wrong?” He asks gently, patting your hair and rubbing your back. You shake your head and bury your face in his neck. He doesn’t push it, he knows you’re vulnerable right now. He just assumes your tears are for Yeonjun.

“Dinner is almost ready, Y/N. You should try to eat something and you can sleep, you need it.” Heeseung softly says walking back to check on the food he’s cooking. “He’s right baby, you haven’t eaten all day and your body must be exhausted.” Jungwon whispers kissing your temple. How could you eat? After that? After everything? Do you tell Jungwon about the call? 

“I’m not hungry,” you mumble looking up at him. 

“Oh come on, Y/N. You need to eat something,” Sunghoon’s voice startled you. You look at him as he walks toward the kitchen, smirking at you, “you’ll need your strength.” 

A loud vibration disturbs your slumber. You groan and try to ignore it, but it keeps going. You reach over to feel for Jungwon but he’s not in bed. Opening your eyes and squinting at his alarm clock, 2:47 a.m. Looking at his side of the bed, it's empty. Where was he? You fell asleep together..

The loud buzzing catches your attention again, you notice it's your phone on his dresser. It stops only for a few seconds before ringing again. Standing on shaky legs to walk to his dresser and pick it up but it stops ringing again. 7 missed calls. You jump when it starts vibrating again.

UNKNOWN NUMBER

It was obvious whoever this was wasn’t going to let up anytime soon. You weren’t going to be a part of this. You powered the phone off and shoved it in the top drawer. You couldn’t deal with this, you were going back home first thing in the morning. Fuck this school, fuck these shitty detectives that couldn’t find this asshole, just fuck everything. 

A harsh vibration startles you, causing you to jump and yelp. “Fuck!” 

Jungwon’s phone on his nightstand lights up and starts ringing. There’s no fucking way..But panic creeps up your neck. Where is Jungwon? Does Ghostface have Jungwon?...Why else would he call both your phone numbers..

UNKNOWN NUMBER

You take a deep breath, you have to find Jungwon.

“Hello..?”

“Hello, Y/N. I want to play a game.” The voice distorted laughs. Your stomach drops, this is real. 

“I’m hanging up..”

“If you hang up, I’ll slit your precious Jungwon’s throat.”

“W-wonnie?!” Your voice came out shaky. Your worst fears become reality, Ghostface had Jungwon. 

Clutching the cell phone, you try to keep it together. You have to be strong. 

“Wh-where is he?”

You step out of the bedroom into the living room in hopes he's there and this is some cruel prank. But, he's not there. The living room is dark, only the street lights giving a warm orange glow around the quiet home. 

“I want to play a game, dumb baby.”

Your eyes land on Heeseung and Sunghoon’s closed bedroom doors, were they in danger too? Stepping forward to Heeseung’s door you reach out to grab the door knob. “If you touch that door I’ll kill your ‘Wonnie’ right now.” The distorted voice spat, making you freeze in place.

The realization that Ghostface could see you made you panic more. Frantically looking around the dark home for any sign of him. Walking in circles in hopes to see something, anything. “What do you want from me!?” You yell into the phone sobbing.  

“I told you dumb baby, I want to play a game.”

There was no getting out of this, but you had to try. Jungwon wouldn’t abandon you and you couldn’t abandon him. “F-fine. But..but only if Jungown is safe.”

“He’ll be safe, as long as you win the game.”

“What game?” your voice barely whispers as you stand in the center of the living room. A loud creak from Won’s bedroom catches your breath in your throat.“...it's called catch the dumb baby”

Pure fear and adrenaline courses through your body carrying your feet faster than you could think and you run toward the front door. Throwing it open, you scream, there he was, Ghostface stood hovering over you. In his classic black robe and the famous white scream mask covered in dirt and speckles of dried blood. His head was tilted to the side, he had a syringe in hand, he shook his head looking at you.

“Dumb baby, you lose.”

Taking a cautious step back, you bump into a hard figure, turning your head only slightly only to see another Ghostface mask out of your peripheral vision. Standing just as tall as the one blocking the front door. 

Fuck.

It all happened so fast, before you could blink or open your mouth to scream for help, the one behind you grabbed you, covering your mouth and pinning your arms to your side with one of his long arms. He maneuvered your face upward harshly exposing your neck to the Ghostface with the syringe. You felt the pin prick in your neck and your body slumped against the one holding you. Whatever they gave you was fast acting and you lost all movement in legs and arms. You slump against the Ghostface holding you, unable to stand on your feet. 

I failed you Wonnie..I’m so sorry.

Your sobs are muffled behind his gloved hand, feeling yourself slowly slip away from reality.

Cold, that’s the first thing you felt. Your limbs feel heavy, mouth dry and head full of eye burning pressure. Everything is blurry and the only thing your vision can make out is the mattress on the floor you’ve been placed on, laid on your side. Realizing you’re also fully nude you try to move your limbs to cover your body and give it some warmth but they’re too heavy to move under whatever sedation they gave you. 

“Our pretty girl is finally awake.” 

Snapping your head to the bottom of the mattress your vision can make out the two figures standing at the edge. Their voices are no longer distorted but the masks are still on. 

“Dumb baby made it too easy,” 

Wait..that voice..He took his mask off first, shaking his hair out of his face. Bambi eyes fully drinking you in. It was terrifying how quickly the doe eyes you trusted narrowed darkly. No signs of innocence, just wild, black, and hungry. Heeseung..Heeseung was Ghostface, he’s the one that drugged you.

Looking at the other Ghostface figure, you already knew who it had to be..He took his mask off, throwing it to the side, a wide smile showing his fangs to you. The first time you had actually seen him smile with his teeth. The smile was anything but friendly. It was deranged and held no humor or comfort behind it. Sunghoon.

“What the fuck..” Your voice cracked and raw, it hurt to talk “Why..I trusted you..Won-wonnie trusted you.”

“Why? God, I hate that fucking question.” Sunghoon snorted, removing the black Ghostface robe off his body, leaving him shirtless and in black denim jeans. He really did, it pissed him off. They all sounded the same when he killed them, why me? What did I do? Why are you doing this? Blah, blah, blah. 

“Does there really have to be a reason why?” Heeseung smiled, nose wrinkling. How could someone that looked as sweet as Heeseung do something like this?

“Stop teasing her Heeseung. We had a good reason to kill each one of those assholes, pretty girl, do you really want all the gory details?” Sunghoon smirked, cocking an eyebrow. You shook your head, you were already on the verge of puking. You didn’t want to know. 

“Are you sure? Because...there was a special one in particular.. we had a really good reason why he had to die.” Heeseung said in a sing song voice. 

Sunghoon dropped his smile and glared at Heeseung, they agreed not to bring him up. Not that he cared about him, or regretted it, he just didn’t want to make this harder than it had to be. Heeseung could feel Sunghoon’s glare on him, he didn’t care. It broke his heart when you agreed to that date, Heeseung spent the whole day crying and screaming when he found out. Really? Choi fucking Yeonjun.

You hurt him, and he wanted to hurt you back. 

Heeseung dropped his body on the mattress and crawled down next to where you were laying and caressed your face gently, “you definitely should have turned down that date with that loser Yeonjun.” Heeseung said in a whisper. Despite the soft voice he used he was boiling in anger at saying that fuckers name. Heeseung took great pleasure in slitting that motherfucker's throat. He never liked getting messy, letting Sunghoon take most of the credit when it came to the murders, but when he heard you were going on a date with Choi fucking Yeonjun he wanted that kill. He craved it. You signed that poor bastard's death warrant when you said yes. Dumb baby. 

God, the way his eyes looked when his blade went into his neck sent him on the most euphoric high he had ever been on. He didn’t mean to cut his neck so deep, but fuck, how dare that motherfucker even think he had the slightest chance to have you. Even watching him bleed out and choke on his blood wasn’t enough, he had to suffer. Driving his blade into his chest over and over until Sunghoon had to physically pull him off of that stupid fucker. 

“You killed him..you killed Yeonjun..” you cried. You were the reason he was dead, it was your fault. “Oh god..Junnie..” You wanted to die, you didn’t deserve to live. You wanted to trade places with Yeonjun, he didn’t deserve that..How could Heeseung do something so vile?

His nickname has Heeseung seeing red. You dumb baby, are you really crying in front of me over him?! He grabbed his knife. “Heeseung,” Sunghoon warned. He wasn’t listening. He pushed your body flat down on the mattress and straddled your waist in a matter of seconds. He held his blade against your neck, the same one he used on him, he was shaking with anger. You had never seen this side of him, the snarl on his face, his eyes wild and black, his honey skin turning red, he was terrifying.  

“What the fuck did you call him?” He pressed the knife harder against your skin, you cried out feeling the blade break skin. He watched his knife tear a thin layer into your skin, blood seeping out. Not enough to cause any major damage, just barely tearing through the first layer of skin. “Do I have to carve my name into your fucking skin so you know who you fucking belong to?!” He was screaming at you only inches from your face. 

“Enough, Heeseung! Get off of her.” Sunghoon grabbed him by the back of his neck, shoving him aside. Heeseung always got a little too emotional when it came to you. Sunghoon had to keep him level headed or else any person who even accidentally looked in your direction would end up dead. 

“Forgive him, pretty girl.” He kneeled next to you, “he’s just protective of you” Sunghood smiled wiping your falling tears. His fingers grazed the line Heeseung made on your throat, coating the tips of them with your blood. He brought them to his lips and licked them clean. Humming softly at the taste of metallic. He couldn’t resist, his body and soul desired to taste every part of you. The scene makes you want to gag in disgust. 

Heeseung rubbed his temples and sighed, he didn’t mean to scare you. He looked at you apologetically. “Sorry sweetheart..I just don’t like you saying his name. You belong to us…and the thought of anyone touching or looking at what’s mine..makes me insane.” He leaned down to your neck and placed soft kisses on the cut he made. “Seungie will kiss it all better.” He mumbled against your skin. 

You laid there emotionless. Had you missed signs of their obsession? Did you ever say something that gave them the wrong idea? You barely talked to them, why? Why is this happening?

Was this really your fault?

You were trapped here, Yeonjun was dead because of you and Jungwon is missing because of you. It was your fault.  

“You know, pretty girl, I heard from a little bird that you think I hate you,” Sunghoon mused, twirling pieces of your hair around his fingers. He pushed Heeseung’s face off of your neck and climbed on top of you, caging you with his arms on either side of your face. You looked so scared and helpless underneath him and it was only turning him on even more.

“I don’t hate you, pretty girl, in fact I love you. I love you so much it's kind of scary. I crave you. I want every part of you. I want to fucking break you so we’ll be the only ones you’ll ever need.” 

You just stared up at him as he spoke, you had never seen this side of him before. The stone features he always gave you were replaced by lustful eyes and a giddy smile on his face. “Do you know how hard it was to watch you all this time and not act on all of the things I dreamed about doing to you?”

Heeseung was lying next to you on his side, propping his head on his hand while watching Sunghoon stare down at you. Finally, you were here, they had you right where they wanted you. Everything they did was for you, their girl. “It’s true, we’ve talked about this for so long and now you’re finally here. It’s almost like a dream come true.” Heeseung grinned tracing your delicate facial features with his fingers. 

“Wh-what are you going to do to me..” your broken voice going straight to their cocks. 

“Now that..pretty girl..is a good fucking question.” Sunghoon smiled leaning down rubbing the tip of his nose against yours. Their “affectionate” touches felt anything but sweet. “What are we going to do with her Seung?” his voice condescending. 

Heeseung chuckled softly and placed wet open mouth kisses on your shoulder down your arms, “I don’t even know where to start..but I’m growing impatient here..” Heeseungs’s hips grinded against your bare thigh and you could feel his hardening cock in his sweats. Fuck, he needed to calm down or he was going to cum before they even got to the good part. 

“Me too..our pretty girl has kept us waiting long enough.” Sunghoon smirks and kisses the corner of your mouth. Licking the streaks of wet tears on your cheeks. Reality hits you like lightning and your fight or flight finally kicks in at the realization. They’re going to rape you..

There was no way in hell you could take on two grown men, especially in your state, but you couldn’t go down without somewhat of a fight. Jungwon would want you to fight. You couldn't control your limbs, you could only twitch the tips of your fingers but you could roll your head, maybe that would be enough. Maybe.

You jerk your head as hard as you can toward Sunghoon’s face since he was closest to your head, it wasn’t a lot of force. But your forehead made direct contact with his nose, not enough to break but enough that had a few drops of blood trickle out and land on your cheek, he let out a slight groan from his throat. 

Heeseung scoffed a laugh and shook his head. If you thought he was bad when he was mad..you weren’t ready for Sunghoon, “dumb baby, that was stupid of you.”

Sunghoon wiped the blood from his nose on the back of his hand before making eye contact with you again, his gaze was unreadable which made it more scary. His hand shoots out at you and harshly grabs your neck and squeezes, cutting off your air supply abruptly. He brought your your face closer to his, “I was going to be nice and take it slow with you pretty girl, but you fucked that up..” His voice is low and slow and his demeanor shifted.

You couldn’t breathe and your face was turning red from the lack of oxygen, your choking sounds and wet cheeks only turning Sunghoon on more. Wet gurgling sounds, your eyes rolling to the back of your head. You couldn’t even lift your arms to try and pry him off of you. Fuck, he needed to get his cock into you fast. He let your neck go but before you could catch your breath he slapped you, with so much force it jerked your head to the side.

“Hoon, we agreed not her face!” Heeseung scoffed, grabbing your face softly placing soft kisses against the cheek Hoon backhanded you on. Heeseung was all for forceful punishment to keep you in your place, but never on your face. Why would he want to hit something so perfect? He told Sunghoon that, never your face, any other part of your body was fair game.  

“I didn’t agree to shit Heeseung, if she’s going to act like a fucking brat I’m going to treat her like one.” Sunghoon moved his body up, carefully placing his knees on both sides of your arms hovering over your chest, careful to not drop any of his weight on you. He unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them low enough to release his aching cock from its restraint. 

You turned your head to the side in a panic and squeezed your eyes shut refusing to look at him. “Please..please Hee-Heeseung..don’t let him..don’t let him do this..please..” you sobbed. It was clear Sunghoon was the one in charge and Heeseung would be your only chance at a saving grace. If you could, you wanted to reach any remorseful part of him to help you. 

He smiled softly and stroked your stinging cheek turning your head to face him. You opened your eyes hoping to see him take your cries and begs into consideration. “Dumb baby, you were a bad girl. We don’t want to punish you but you’re going to have to learn the rules. And rule one is to be a good girl for us. You were naughty for hitting Hoonie, after everything he’s done to keep you safe. You're going to have to make it up to him.” Kissing your sore cheek he looks up at Sunghoon with his big doe eyes and nods.

Sunghoon grabs a fistful of your hair and jerks your head straight forcing you to look up at him, “I’m going to train you to be a good obedient girl…you bite me, and I’ll slit Jungwon’s throat in front of you.” Bottom lip trembling you nod. They knew you would do anything for Jungwon’s safety, and they were going to use that to their advantage. Letting go of your hair his hand runs down your face softly taking in every beauty mark, eyelash, and the smear of his blood on your cheek. So fucking pretty.

He taps your bottom lip with his thumb, “open.”

Closing your eyes, you refuse to even look at him while he does this, you obey. He leans forward positioning himself over your open mouth, tapping the head of his cock against your tongue. Steadying himself with his right hand he uses his left to guide himself into your mouth. A long strained groan rumbles in his throat, your mouth felt better than he imagined. He couldn’t hold back anymore. He drags the underside of his cock on your tongue slowly before quickly forcing his full length in your mouth. 

He’s careful to not slam his full weight onto your face with each drag of his cock. The amount of spit and precum forced down your throat made you gag around him struggling to breath, but your noises made him fuck your face faster, salty fat tears pooling into your ears. 

He continued to pull out and thrust his aching cock back in, making sharp painful jabs down your throat. The way your mouth gagged and struggled around him only had his orgasm approaching quicker. His pace grew more unsteady and quick as he felt his high approaching. You tried your best to relax your throat around him, but it was too uncomfortable and the way his stomach hit the tip of your nose with each hard thrust only added to your misery. “O-oh fuck,” he grunted and forced himself even deeper into your throat, your nose completely smushed against his stomach blocking all your airways. 

His cum spilled from his cock and down your throat as you struggled not to choke. You swallowed as much as you could in a panic trying to find a way to breathe. Some of it seeped out of the sides of your mouth and down your chin. His body shuddered at the tight contraction of your throat, he stilled himself for a few seconds to catch his breath.

He pulled himself out of your mouth slowly, watching the strings of spit and his seed connect his softening cock to you. What a sight for sore eyes, he can’t imagine an even more perfect vision of you as he watched you cough and choke trying to catch your breath. He climbs off of you and lays beside you to really take a minute to admire how perfect you look right now. Your face is red, spit and cum dribbling from your chin, tears still falling. He wanted to burn this image of you in his head forever. He tapped your mouth with his index finger, “open.” 

You open your mouth. Sunghoon smiles, you’re listening. Maybe breaking you in was going to be easier than he thought. Leaning in he licks his cum and your spit from your chin before sticking his tongue in your mouth, making sure every part of your mouth tastes entirely of him. 

“You did good, pretty girl,” He mumbles, “made me feel so fucking good..”pulling away and pecking your lips softly. He smiles and looks at Heeseng on the opposite side of you. “You can reward her.” 

Heeseung smiles brightly and practically jumps on top of you. Immediately latching his mouth to yours, Sunghoon notices you’re not kissing him back and clicks his teeth. “Pretty girl, don’t be rude, Seungie is trying to reward you. Do you want to be punished again? Or should I go grab Jung-”

You don’t let him finish, squeezing your eyes shut you kiss Heeseung back, you need to. You needed to for Jungwon. You can feel Heeseung smile against your puckered lips. Lightly nipping your bottom lip before he slips his tongue inside and gently massages yours. Unlike Sunghoon, Heeseung was softer and took his time exploring your mouth. Not even caring Sunghoon’s cum was just in there he happily slurped everything his tongue swiped. 

You kissed him back like your life depended on it..because it did..Jungwon was your life.. 

He pulls away with a small hum, a string of spit still connecting your tongues together. “I wonder if every part of you tastes as sweet as your mouth..” He kisses your jaw, your neck, your collarbones. His eyes locked onto yours as he moved lower, his face hovering over your left breast. He lightly traces your nipple with the tip of his tongue and smirks at the way your body shivers underneath him and how your back slightly arches off the mattress, Sunghoon catches it too. 

Heeseung smiles at you sweetly before moving even lower. “I’m going to make you feel so good..” He slots himself between your legs and places your legs over his shoulders. He kisses the inside of your thigh, “I love you..so much..” The “loving” act only adds insult to injury in the situation. If he really loved you, he wouldn’t force you to do this. 

Hesseung dragged his tongue along your folds and you squirmed. His eyes fluttered shut and he hummed against your core. The amount of times he's snuck into your dorm and stolen your dirty panties to shove in his mouth while he jerked off couldn’t have prepared him for the real thing. Only a few seconds in and he was already pussy drunk on your taste and smell.

You bit down on your bottom lip hard as he worked slowly through your folds; teasing you as he flicked his tongue across your clit. Your fingers dug into the mattress, your knuckles turning white. You refuse to make a sound..you won’t give them the satisfaction. Heeseung watches you as he takes your clit  into his mouth and sucks hard. The first moan accidentally slips past your lips at the sensation. You couldn’t withhold the pathetic noise you made and you felt shame. Your breath hitched and your eyelids started to flutter as his tongue skillfully worked its way through your folds licking and sucking every crevice before dipping into your hole. He groans loudly, as he starts to tongue fuck your hole feeling you clench around him. His hips started grinding against the mattress aching for some relief on his cock. 

Sunghoon studies your face, he knows you're holding back. “It feels good doesn't it pretty girl..let him hear more of those pretty sounds.” You glare at him, but you know your body is betraying you. Your face is flushed, legs shaking around his head, stomach caving in every time he hits that special spot. “Let Seungie…” He grabs a handful of Heeseung’s hair and presses him harder against your cunt, “hear you.”

You screw your eyes shut and moan at the newly applied pressure of Heeseung’s nose on your clit. Heeseung’s hooded eyes watch you as you arch and moan out. He pulls away slightly and spits on your pussy, adding more moisture before running the pads of his fingers through your folds making you shudder harder and throw your head back. He collects his spit and your arousal around his pointer and middle finger before shoving both of them inside of you.

“Ah!”

“Stretch her nice and good Seungie..”Sunghoon smiled, leaning down and capturing your lips in another dirty kiss of tongue and teeth. The room filled with the disgusting squelching sounds of your pussy around Heeseungs fingers. Heeseung’s tongue went back to working on your clit as continued to finger fuck you at a fast relentless pace. He could feel how close you were by the way you were gripping him. You tried to hold it, you tried to move your hips away, he just held your waist down with his free hand and sucked harder. Against your will, it happened, your stomach concaved and you cried out in Sunghoon’s mouth feeling your forced release gush out of you. Sunghoon pulled away from your mouth so he could watch your face when you cum.

So pretty.

The way you sounded was enough to make Heeseung cum in his pants. “Fuck, I need to be inside of you right now..” Loud sobs rack your body, this was it..”do-don’t do this..” Heeseung stripped quickly, not bothering to wipe your cum off of his face. “Hee-Heeseung, please..please don’t..”

Sunghoon sighed and kissed your forehead, “pretty girl, Seungie let you cum, don’t be rude. Be a good girl and let him cum too..I don’t want to have to kill Jungwon because of you. This is supposed to be a special night.” 

Jungwon. You had to for Jungwon.

“Not-not inside. Don't cum.. Not inside..please..”

He looked at Heeseung, and they shared an unspoken conversation through their eyes. “Okay, pretty girl. Seungie won’t cum inside of you..tonight..”

Heeseung ran his hand up and down his length, lubricating himself with his precum. He placed his thick cock head at your entrance and you whimpered from sensitivity from your orgasm. He pushed into you sharply. You gasped, screwing your eyes shut as he forced himself all the way to his base, allowing no time for you to adjust his large size. 

“Oh my god…” He panted, closing his eyes. His self control is no longer present, he pulled out of you slowly and slammed back in setting a pace. He was thrusting into you just as violently as he had entered you, his pace was unrelenting as he worked into your tight gummy walls. You whined with each jolt of force from his thrusts. Your back arched in pain, fingernails clawing helplessly at the mattress. You could hear the change in his breathing signaling he was nearing his own release. At least he was fast, this would be over soon. 

Sunghoon rolled his eyes, of course Heeseung was going to cum already, he didn’t know how to pace himself. But more annoying, he was going to finish before you, treating you like some quick random hookup. He was going to have to talk to him about that later. To Sunghoon, your pleasure came before theirs, unless of course you were being punished. He took your nipple into his mouth, sucking on the bud and slipped his hand down to your cunt.

His skillful fingers found your clit and he rubbed the nub tenderly, applying the perfect amount of pressure. The pain from Heeseung’s cock quickly turned into pleasure. Your pained squeaks and whines tuning into soft moans and pants. Heeseung’s hands went to your waist as he held your hips in place rutting against you faster. Your eyes fluttered shut as you started to shake under him, unable to fend off the building orgasm, thanks to Sunghoon. Small grunts escaping his parted lips, the only sound he was capable of making. He was too lost in the feel of your pussy. 

“Cum on Seungie’s cock pretty girl..” Sunghoon smiled, releasing your nipple from his mouth. He rubbed your clit harder causing a loud moan to bubble from you. Your back arched off the mattress as you were suddenly overwhelmed with white hot pleasure, his fingers helping draw forth your second orgasm.

So fucking pretty.

You clenched hard around Heeseung as you came, he snapped his hips forward harshly and a deep whine escaped his lips. He hung his head back and pulled out of you quickly, he hissed wrapping his hand around his red sensitive cock and jerked himself off above you. His cum spurting out of the red tip, strings of his seed coating your stomach, and reaching your breasts. 

His chest rose fast and hard as he collapsed next to you, sweat gathered on his forehead, he smiled softly at you. “Thank you baby..so good..so good for me..” He mumbled kissing your lips in soft little pecks. Sunghoon grabbed one of their discarded Ghostface robes and wiped Heeseung’s cum off of you. “Excuse him, pretty girl, he apparently doesn’t know how to be a gentleman.”

“Fuck you,” Heeseung grumbled. “I couldn’t help it, she’s so tight and warm.” He hummed relishing in the way your sweet little pussy gripped his tongue, fingers, and cock. He wasn’t phased by how quickly he came, he has all the time in the world to learn your body and how to pace himself. All the time in the world. 

You felt disgusting at the way they have your body reacting to their touches. 

Sunghoon discarded the rest of his clothes away and took his position on his knees in between your aching legs. You blinked a few tears away, you already knew he was going to have his turn with you but it didn’t stop the fear. You had to do this. They had Jungwon and you were his only chance at making it out of this alive. 

You made the mistake of looking down at him and let out a shaky breath. He was ready for you; he was fully hard and throbbing, from the way your mouth struggled to accommodate him you knew this was going to hurt. He saw the worried look on your face and cupped your cheek, “it won’t hurt after a while. I’m going to train your little pussy how to take it pretty girl. Hoonie’s going to take care of you.” 

He kissed you tenderly, “I love you.”

He feels your legs twitch around him, and sees your arms twitch at your sides, only meaning the drug will be wearing off soon. He didn’t want you to realize that and start acting out again, he smiled at Heeseung, “Seungie will you hold our girl for me? She’s a little nervous and maybe you can comfort her.” 

Heeseung was more than happy to oblige. He moved to the side of the mattress and sat with his back against the wall. Sunghoon picked your body up and moved you over to Heeseungs awaiting arms. He sits you with your back and head pressed against Heeseung’s firm chest, Heeseung hooks his hands under your knees and spreads your legs open wide for Sunghoon. Hit bites his bottom lip at the sinful sight of you sprawled out like this waiting for him. Your wet and swollen pussy only looks more appetizing for him when you're being held like this.

“Keep her there Seung,” He smirks gripping the base of his cock as he moved closer to you. He rubbed the tip along your folds, coating it in your juices. Your body jerks at the sensitivity from your previous two orgasms.

“Be a good girl for Hoonie, and he’ll give you a special treat.” Heeseung whispered, kissing the crown of your head. Unless the treat was Jungwon you didn’t care. You wanted this over fast, you prayed he’d be as fast as Heeseung. 

Sunghoon watches you intently as he slides into your tight cunt. A low rumble in his chest feeling you suck him in and tighten. “Fuck....” He bottoms out and it hurts how full you are. More tears spill from your eyes, your mouth dropped in a silent scream. He can see the outline of his cock in your stomach and it fuels his fire.

“Look at that, I'm all the way..” He presses down on the bulge of his cock under your belly button, “in here.” You involuntary moan at the pressure and you clench around him.

He chuckles as he starts to move. Every movement from him has him deeper inside you. Your walls unwillingly cling to him and you close your eyes not wanting to see him. You want so desperately to mentally check out and forget where you and what's happening to you, but you can’t as he brings you back to the harsh reality with each burning thrust.

“God, pretty girl, you feel so good..” The sounds of your bodies slapping together, the disgusting sloppy squelching sounds of your pussy only fueling his animalistic desires. He wasn’t gentle with you, each thrust inside of you jerked your entire body upward and had you sliding up and down on Heeseung’s chest. You were still sore from Heeseung’s assault on you and the pain of Sunghoon’s thick cock ramming into you had your entire pelvic region burning. Whimpering louder each time he rocked into you.

“Look at me,” He growled. 

You hesitantly open your eyes and look at his sweaty face, he watches you with hooded dark eyes, he has an odd look in his eye. The same one Heeseung sees when Sunghoon has his blade buried in someone. He was gone. 

“Say my name.” 

“W-Wha-”

He slaps you, the action splitting your lip open. You cry out and try to move but Heeseung’s grip on your legs is firm, keeping you open for Sunghoon’s continued assault on your pussy. He thrusts into you harder, gripping your hips hard, digging his fingers into your flesh, bruising the skin. “Say my fucking name. NOW!”

“S-Sun-Sungho-hoon..” Blood is dribbling from your wounded lip down your chin.

“Again!”

“Sunghoon!”

“Keep saying it..” He grunts.

Lowering his face to yours he licks the blood from your chin. Watching you shake and write underneath him had his orgasm nearing. He guides your hips up and down on his shaft, impaling you deeper on him with each painful thrust on his thick cock. Groaning at the sight of your creamy essence coating him, he wasn’t going to last long. He gave a particular hard thrust that had you squealing and kicking your legs, a cheshire grin taking over his face.

He found it. 

He keeps hitting that spot with all of his strength and watches the way your eyes cross and roll back helplessly. You’re screaming his name over and over, it was happening again. The knot in your belly is ready to snap. “Cum for me..cum for me and I’ll breed you..” He breathes reaching between your bodies and rubbing circles on your clit with the pad of this tumb.

“NO!” you screamed, “you-you said-” 

He laughs breathlessly, throwing his head back. Heeseung gave you the appropriate nickname, you really were just a dumb baby. He rubs your nub harder, “pretty girl, I said Seungie wouldn’t cum in you..I never said I wouldn’t cum inside of you..cum for me..come on baby..let go for us..” 

The tip of his cock hits your spot and you squeak loudly, unable to stop it, throwing your head back on Heeseung’s chest letting your orgasm hit you hard. Your body convulses as you clench around Sunghoon coating the entirety of his cock in your release. He chokes out a moan, thrusting only a few more times before he stills, painting your insides with his thick white cum. Sealing your fate to him, to them. You’re theirs and you weren’t going anywhere. 

Heeseung held your shaking body closely as you tried to catch your breath. He was whispering sweet praises in your ears and kissing your wet cheeks, “such a good girl for us. So perfect..tell Hoonie thank you for your treat..”

“Th-thank you..Ho-Hoonie..”

Sunghoon smiled widely at his nickname rolling off your tongue, he gently pulled out of your sore cunt and smirked looking at the creamy mess leaking out of your gaping hole, “you’re very welcome pretty girl.” He kissed you tenderly, lightly licking at the remaining blood left on your busted lip.

A few minutes had passed and the post orgasm brain fog was finally clearing and you gasped remembering Jungwon. Lifting your head off of Heeseung’s chest and searching around the dark room panicked. Sunghoon was still kneeling in front of you and Heeseung, he watched your panicked gaze with an amused smirk. He wasn’t stupid he knew what you remembered.

“Where is he? Wh-where is Jungown? Can I see him..please..” You asked slowly, afraid of the answer. 

A small breathless laugh left Heeseungs lips, Sunghoon moved from his place in front of you and sat next to you and Heeseung. He grabbed your chin forcing you to look to the side of the room at the dark corner. 

“Ah..pretty girl, why don’t you see for yourself.”

The big “finale” was finally being unveiled. He wasn’t lying earlier when he told you he wanted to break you so all you would ever need is them. 

What? What was he talking about? Jungwon was here? Squinting your eyes to adjust to the darkness you saw him. Sunghoon smiled widely watching your eyes slowly widen with realization, your mouth dropped open and you screamed. The room was spinning, all the air knocked out of your lungs as you felt the bile rise in your throat as you cried and wailed against Heeseung trying to push him off of you, but he kept his grip tight on you. 

You wish they would have just killed you, death would have been better than this. 

Jungown sat in a wooden chair smiling in your direction softly, holding a camcorder. His eyes trained on the tiny camcorder screen before finally looking at you. 

“What’s wrong bunny, aren't you happy to see me?”

#hoonieshoney #enha smut #enhypen smut #enhypen hard hours #sunghoon smut #sunghoon x reader #lee heesung smut #heeseung x reader #heeseung smut #park sunghoon #park sunghoon smut #kpop smut #the hunt is on #honeys dark content

[kikiyoomis]

when you first met suna, the first thing you thought was that “yea he definitely smokes, drinks and fucks around.” and every time you saw him that impression only cemented itself.

your university program had this famed student run party. it was the only highlight of the new school year. people got so incredibly wasted, lost their virginity, got high as fuck… it was a party that encaptured the student body.

you were excited to go to the party, it was a chance to dress up, look sexy and maybe flirt with a couple of guys way out of your league using liquid courage. and besides you had your trustworthy friends with you, so at least you have someone watching your back… at least when they’re sober.

entering the party, the loud music pounded into your ears. people were dancing, drinking, playing games. you scanned the room looking for any familiar faces to go and talk to.

unsurprisingly, you saw suna standing around the patio with a couple of his friends and some girls. he had a red solo cup in hand while his friends smoked. the girls were all giggling and the boys’ body language seemed to give off a flirty intention.

a girl touches suna’s arm and he turns to face her, her hand slipping back to herself. he smiles and laughs and you think to yourself that if he does that more often he could easily be the most popular person on campus. he has the looks and the body it would easily attract a vast majority of people. and it already has for the most part.

‘but it’s none of my business’ you think before heading off towards your friends for a round of shots to start off the night.

drink after drink, dancing with your friends, talking with people you know you’ll never see again, it was really a fun night. so fun in fact, that you’ve ran away from your friends to hide in a dark corner kissing a man you don’t have a single clue about. no seriously. one moment you were dancing, and then the next moment you were no longer on the dance floor with your friends and instead with this man. not that you really care that much consider you’re having the best moment you’ve ever had in your entire life.

he was such a damn good kisser. after every breath you pull him back because you didn’t have enough. tongues fighting for dominance and lips bruising themselves purple with the intensity of the kiss.

“god, fuck, you’re really not gonna let me go huh,” he teases and you leave a hickey on his neck. he places a hand around your ass and leans back, bringing you down with him.

“mmm shut up and kiss me some more” you say locking your lips with his again. it was addicting and you couldn’t get enough of it.

“hey suna where are you?!” a voice calls out suddenly, startling the both of you. the two of you sat in silence, waiting for the guy to pass. you can hear him walking around the little corner you were in, making your heart beat in anxiousness. it would be so embarrassing if someone spots you two…

only when another friend tells him to forget about suna and to just go to the second party that the first guy leaves.

“i thought they’d never leave. that friend has some sense to just leave suna. he’s probably getting high somewhere…” you mumble, a little grumpy at the interruption. the guy you’re with laughs and pulls you closer to the point you’re straddling his lap.

“why? don’t want to share me?” the comment almost cures your drunken mind. despite literally locking lips with him for who knows how long you finally take a look at his face.

suna smiles smugly at you, amused at the fact that the person he’s been kissing simply never bothered to see who it was.

you sat there stunned, at a loss for words. suna leans forward and places a couple of kissing on your exposed nape, travelling upwards until he reaches the corner of your mouth.

“i’ve never been a stoner or done any drugs but i think what you’ve done to me is getting me higher than any drugs could” he teases.

“… you’ve never done drugs?” you say surprised as you mindlessly wrap your arms around his shoulders. though there wasn’t any proof that he did do them, it was just an assumption considering the crowd he involves himself with.

“the worst i do is drink since i am a professional athlete and need to care about diets and shit like that. but im such a lightweight that two drinks is all it takes to have me drunk.”

the reality was so far off of your impression of him. but then again it makes sense.

“do you do this often then? considering what we’re doing now?” you ask, purposefully leaning closer to him to the point you can feel each others breath.

“jealous are we?” he teases, pulling your hips closer to his.

“do you want the whole truth or should i just lie to get this over with so we can book a hotel room and have some fun” he asks, his hand reaching under your shirt, his finger lifting the underwire of your bra ever so slightly.

“if i ask for the whole truth is the hotel room offer still gonna be up?” you ask.

“of course, i’ll make you feel so good that even if you got blackout drunk your body will still remember everything when your mind doesn’t”

it wasn’t that you’ve never liked him, but you’ve also never hated him. he was someone you thought you would never be entangled with so you were indifferent. both of your lives were so different that there wasn’t going to be any reason the two of you would even speak. maybe it was the alcohol in your system but there’s something attracting you to him. something that makes you want to know him more and a little something that would make you sad to see him go.

“i want to know” you tell him.

“i don’t do these things with other people” he says.

“huh? but your frien-“

“my friends do, but i didn’t want to seem like the type of guy to flirt around and seem like an unfaithful partner around my crush. though i seem to have failed according to you”

you raise an eyebrow at suna who seemed to accuse you of ruining his character.

“did your crush reject you? considering you’re even willing to go to a hotel room with me” you act boldly, kissing his cheek while your hand caresses his body lower and lower. suna catches on quickly and grabs your naughty hand and presses to his mouth.

“i don’t think so but i don’t think they’re rejecting me since they’re so excited to go to the hotel room that they can’t keep their hands off of me”

#haikyu #haikyuu #suna rintarou #suna x reader #suna rintaro x reader #hq suna #suna x you #suna rintaro haikyuu #suna rintaro x y/n #part 2? maybe with some spice?

[silverstonesainz]

hi!! could i request "i'm in love with you, you dumbass." & "i've been following you around like a lost puppy since the day we met, yet you couldn't see?" with Max? thank you!

not enough 𐙚 all the words, all the love– it's still not enough (1.4k words)

d rambles. . . im sorry this took forever and that it kinda sucks. i did what i could. thank u for requesting

The room feels stuffy. Twenty minutes ago you were shivering but now you’re hot. The whole room pays no mind to your discomfort, you’re sure no one even has a clue how uncomfortable you feel in your own skin. You try to find the will to stay, to tough out the next hour or so for him. But the longer you stand in a crowd of people who you could care less about being here. It was no fun watching Max flirt with another girl at the bar anyways, and the more you stand and stare the more your will withers away. 

It’s stretched thin, a rubber band being pulled well beyond its means. You’re holding one and Max has the other. He pulls and pulls and—

Max leans in. He leans down so close you can only imagine the lucky girl can smell his after shave and feel his warm breath tickle her skin. And he makes her laugh. 

Snap.

You inhale sharply, balling the fabric of your dress to calm your nerves. You don’t bother to excuse yourself from the conversation you were stood in, just squeeze past bodies and through the room in search for just a bit for fresh air because you can’t fucking breathe. 

The double glass doors take you out onto the bustling street and straight into the cold wind. You welcome the kiss of cold air against your skin, the shiver it sends down on your spine. You welcome the brief distraction because at least for the next few seconds you don’t have to feel your chest caving in. At least for now, even with people rushing by you with people to see and places to go, you are happy in your solitude. Misery and loneliness cannot find you in these five seconds, you are untouchable. 

But it was merely just a moment, nothing less and nothing more. It’s fleeting, quick to slip from you. You’re pulled back down to earth when you hear your name called behind you, confused, waiting for an answer to an unasked question. You squeeze your eyes, ball your fist at your sides and find it in you to pretend like you’re alight. Breathe in, breathe out.

There you are, Max sounds relieved when he says it. “Why’d you leave?”

“Felt stuffy,” You admit curtly, still refusing to look at him. “Couldn’t breathe.” 

Your tone does not fly by Max, and you miss the way he frowns at the back of your head because of it. But he’s Max, ever hopeful and ever oblivious. “Well come back, they’re about to make an announcement.” 

Tension falls from your palm as you flex your fingers back. You inhale sharply, letting cool air fill your lungs and creep under your skin. “I think I might just go.” 

Max’s footsteps pit-pat around you, feel his hand hold onto your elbow gently as he takes a look at you. He tries to find a sliver of emotion, a tell of why you suddenly want to leave. But all he finds is exhaustion, a dead-pan look that leaves him without a clue. 

“You’re mad.” He shifts on his feet, says it like he knows because he just does. Of course he does. He steps out so he’s directly in front of you, head tilted so he can get a better look at your face. “You’re mad at me?” 

You turn away. “I’m not mad at you.” 

You’re mad at him. You’re mad he can’t see you, mad that he doesn’t want you. You are mad, but you don’t have a right to be. You’re upset and aching in your chest all over a boy who has no fucking clue. You’re mad. You’re mostly mad at yourself, for letting your feelings grow as much as they did, to allow your heart to dictate the way you move around him. 

“But you’re mad. Why?”

You groan, head falling into your hands, “I don’t wanna talk about it, I just wanna go home.” 

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong.” Max tucks his index finger under your chin, forces your gaze up to his face. You resent the way he worries, resent the way his bright blue eyes are just filled with it, it almost makes you feel guilty for the way your chest aches. His finger feels hot against your skin, shoots sparks through every nerve ending and suddenly the cold air does nothing to keep you calm. 

You turn your head, yanking your chin away from him and take a few steps backwards as you search for the feeling of cold air, for the freedom of just being able to fucking breathe. You’re ashamed of the way your chest heaves, that you show just how weak he can make you with just one touch. Max asks what’s wrong, calls out your name with the same worry you saw in his eyes two seconds ago. It shouldn’t make your blood boil but it does. It fucking does. 

“Stop! Stop! Stop!” You beg, “Please stop. Please stop saying my name and asking what’s wrong because—“ The cold air finally catches you and grabs the words in your throat. You swallow, hard, pushing down every single thought and mistake that threatens to come out. “I just need space.” 

Max’s shoulder’s slump behind you, expression wounded and confused. “What’s your problem?”

It’s an honest question. It’s Max being Max— blunt and straight to the point. He doesn’t spare your feelings, doesn’t tiptoe around your obviously fired state because why should he? He’s always been this way, and it was a trait that you’ve always found endearing. But in this moment, with smoke pouring out of your ears and your heart beating so hard it rattles your ribs, it was like turning up the stove on water that is already boiling. It’s just enough to break you, just enough for everything you’ve spent months trying to keep at bay to bubble over. 

“You!” Your fingers rake through your hair roughly, undoing the effort you put in to make it look nice. You were shaking, every bit of you searching for bit of release and all you had was the words on the tip of your tongue.

“Me?!” Max answers back, confused. “What did I do?!”

“You’re just…” The words begin to tumble out of you in an incoherent stutter. “I've been following you around like a lost puppy since the day we met, yet you couldn't see? You still don’t see…” 

You almost want to laugh at the way Max looks at you and how invisible you truly are. This was the moment it was supposed to click and yet he still doesn’t have a clue— like it’s almost unfathomable to him that you could ever want more than what you both share. 

“I’m in love with you,” Your voice shakes, “you dumbass.” 

Max’s brows furrow, eyes expectant. He’s waiting for the punchline, the part of the joke where you shove him back and say that you were only kidding. But you stand there, cold wind kissing your skin pink and the world just bustling by. Despite the people walking too and fro, despite the murmurs of conversation that are completely lost to you, the silence between the two of you was deafening.

You don’t know how long it is until the boy in front of you makes a move. You watch as he rubs his jaw, eyes cast past you as he searches for the right thing to say. The wind is knocked out of you as you watch Max try and fail to say something, anything. Instead you’re left to listen to the stammers and syllables of failed words. 

I’m sorry, is all he manages. 

He’s sorry that you’re upset. Sorry that you bore your heart out for him and all he had to show for was a stutter and stammer. He apologizes because he sees you, he sees all of you, and somehow you were not enough. Max says he loves you — because of course he loves you, you’re his best friend. He says that he appreciates you, that he can’t stand to lose you and he hopes that you would still want to stay even if he can’t love you that way. Max says all the right things, all the things that were meant to quell your aching heart. Instead it does the opposite. The words pluck at the pieces of your heart, shard by shard until you’re left with a hole in your chest in the shape of him. Max does everything right and yet, like you, it’s not enough. 

#🏷️ the sad mix #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen x you #max verstappen one shot #max verstappen blurb #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen angst

[ayeforscotland]

I cannot overstate this.

These people do not have a fucking clue what they’re talking about.

#ayeforscotland #anti AI bullshit

[blueeofsl]

Page 17. We see that Donnie is just laughing at the joke now. It might be because it’s right after Leo sobbing for a while and then he just pulls that joke out of nowhere, or the fact that Donnie is exhausted. Or maybe, Donnie just really missed his stupid jokes

But it relaxes Donnie out of whatever caffeine or adrenaline high he’s been in for so long, and he passes out on Leo. Literally laughs himself to sleep.

However for Leo, this was probably really worrying. Because Donnie was active and talking to him and suddenly he’s passed out. (Also is it just me or does it look like Leo’s stump is sorta holding Donnie’s head up?)

~~~~~

In Page 18, Leo gently lays Donnie down on the bed he had woken up from. Staring at Donnie the whole way through with a sort of attentiveness to any sort of discomfort/pain.

He’d probably noticed the eyebags under Donnies eyes too.

In the second panel, Leo’s worry shows through again and seems to need to take a breath before checking Donnie’s pulse in panel three.

The fact that Donnie lets this happen so willingly (even when passed out. I would guess that over the years in the apocalypse, the turtles have learned a way to protect themselves even in their sleep.) shows that he is fully out and probably wont wake up for a while.

~~~~~

In page 19, notice how there wasn’t just one panel being used to show Leo focusing on Donnie’s pulse, but two. We can tell by Leo’s facial expression that he’s still having doubts of seeing Donnie alive again.

Still doubting that things are real in the third panel as he goes to check his own pulse. His own pulse being much quicker than Donnies. This could be because of the fact that Donnie’s asleep while Leo is awake. Or it could be the fact that Leo is very alert now that he’s alone.

In the last panel, Leo finally lets himself say what he’s thinking at the moment “what the fuck”. I don’t think ive ever read those words with so much emotion behind them because yes. Leo is just… so confused on how he got here. He has no clue that they’re in the present timeline, where Donnie can resurrect people. He has no idea if there are other people out there other than him and Donnie. He doesn’t even know that the sky is now free of krang and is blue instead of the apocalyptic red.

The last panel also shows us that Leo is also finally starting to take note of his surroundings, past just trying to reach for Donnie.

~~~~~

Some other theories/notes; I’m guessing that Leo is going to need a lot of guidance/reassurance of the fact that things are real and that he can relax. Like Casey, he probably wont be a fan of the big crowds in NYC and would rather stay hidden.

I’m also guessing that the family will have some sort of “talk” about what has happened overall. The war, the people they’ve lost, everything. Maybe Cass wont add this in, but I think Mikey will try to have everyone at least address the fact that not only are they survivors, but they are also veterans from a long, long war.

~~~~~~~~~~

Phew… that was a lot of writing! Loved checking through all 59 panels and finding the little details/ focusing on the emotion Cass was trying to portray there.

Would like to thank @somerandomdudelmao for the comics and also @tapakah0 and @ryanthel0ser for being wonderful motivators hehe

PART 1

PART 2

PART 3 (here)

#the way that I did this in 2 and a half hours #hungover too #brainrot go brrrrr #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #future leo #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #cass apocalyptic series #rise of the turtles #I literally woke up #and just started writing nonstop #over 3000 words dear god

[emmyrosee]

He doesn’t feel right. He shouldn’t be doing this.

Kiyoomi isn’t exactly the best with the relationship thing; be it friends, or family, or intimate, he’s left a lot of that to Motoya- the “nice” one.

It never really bothered him that Motoya was considered ‘nicer’ than him, Kiyoomi knew his heart’s reasonings for picking and choosing who and what to have empathy and respect for; just because Komori had less of a sense for it, doesn’t mean he’s ‘nicer.’

And then you crashed into Sakusa Kiyoomi’s life.

With no remorse or sympathy, you strut your way into Kiyoomi’s life like you owned the rental space in his heart and mind, like you were meant to be there all along, and despite never, ever having been in genuine love before, your presence felt natural to the unnatural and unpredictable world.

And he feels absolutely terrible he probably demolished that.

More so because you deserve better; he doesn’t feel sorry for himself that he probably lost the best thing that ever happened to him. You don’t deserve his malice, and tonight, that’s all he subjected you to.

So, against all his logic and his mind begging him to stay and let you have your space, his heart refuses. It yearns for you, it craves you, wants to know you’re okay and that he supports you if you’ve fallen out of love with him.

Because sure, kiyoomi hates sleeping on couches. But he hates sleeping without you more.

Shambling into the living room- only stubbing his toe once or twice, impressive even to him- he manages to make his way to your quivering frame, and he swallows thickly at the distraught mess he’s made you.

“Hey,” kiyoomi sighs, watching with a wince as you scrub your eyes. They’re so swollen, and they leave tears along your fingers, but he says nothing about it, not wanting you to feel worse.

“I’m sorry!” You choke. “Did I wake you? I should’ve been quiet. You need your sleep, you have to-“

“Stop,” he croaks, the lump in his throat bubbling up. “Don’t apologize.” He’s the one that kicked you out of your own bedroom, and you’re standing there, apologizing to him?

He’s amazed you haven’t left him yet.

If he were you, he would’ve. This would be the final straw, the end all of your relationship. He’d pack up all his shit, throw it in a suitcase and absolutely book it out of the house. He’d slash a hole in three of your tires, because all four means you don’t have to pay for them, so three is for the best revenge, and he’d go fuck your cousin who’s so much nicer than you could ever be, and-

“Kiyoomi?”

“Three,” he says suddenly, cheeks flushing hot when he realizes you have no clue what he’s talking about. He clears his throat and scrubs his face with his large hands. “I’m… I wanted to come and apologize.”

Immediately, your heaving sobs come to an end, tears dribbling down your face and falling from your chin once they gain enough weight and momentum. He gives you a shaky sigh, “I never…” he forces the lump down his throat as best as he can, “I never should’ve snapped at you like that, or kept you away from your own bed; you… you’ve never done that to me, even if I’ve deserved it.”

You still say nothing, eyes glimmering up at him in bewilderment. He should shut up, he knows, but he wants to put all the cards down because you don’t have to forgive him- you deserve to have whatever closure you need to take.

Even if that is slashing three of his tires.

“You don’t have to justify me being malicious,” he continues with a shaky sigh. “I’ve had people my whole life do that, and I’ve let them. You don’t have to- I never should’ve turned you away like that.”

“So you’ve said,” you croak. Your head turns to avoid his gaze, and after a few moments, your shoulders start to heave again. “It…” you snarl softly, “it was never about the bed, Kiyoomi. You sent me away… did I really make you that mad?”

“No,” he says, crouching down to make himself smaller, more approachable than his usual 190.5 centimeter frame. “That’s on me, baby. That has nothing to do with you. I’m the one who betrayed that trust and blew everything far out of proportion.” His head ducks to try and meet your gaze, mumbling a soft ‘can I touch you?’ and he’s unsurprised when you shake your head ‘no.’

You do, however, turn to look at him, and it makes his heart pound even more than it already was- a task he thought was impossible, but here you were, proving that theory wrong.

“I didn’t do anything to you,” you whimper. He nods, looking down shamefully. Your breathing is ragged, “you’re the one who threw me aside. I tried, Kiyoomi, I tried to apologize and make you forgive me, and you rejected it.” Once again, he says nothing. “You’ve never been so mad where you… where you didn’t w-want me.”

He disobeys your wishes and places a loving hand on your knee, shaking his head. “Don’t be like that.” He blinks his own line of tears down, and even if he doesn’t deserve a lick of your kindness, you reach out to wipe it away. “Stop blaming yourself for the shit I’ve done; it was selfish, and I didn’t think about you, or us, and I was an idiot.”

He squeezes your knee, “but I always will want you. Even if I didn’t show it tonight.” Your hand trembles against his soft cheek, thumb grazing along the stubble that grows. You look him up and down, almost processing his apology and deciphering if it’s good enough.

“You fucked up,” you say finally. Despite himself, he gives you a soft chuckle.

“I know.”

“Don’t be this person, Kiyoomi,” you say, a pleading lilt to your voice. “I don’t want to play these games with you. We’re adults. You can’t shut me out because you get mad at me.”

“I know,” he says quietly. Then, he stands up, “I understand if… if you still want to be alone. I just wanted to you know that no matter what I say or do, I love you. And I appreciate you for always being here.”

Always here. Always watching him. Always loving him.

“I want to come to bed.”

His ears perk up at your sudden, soft words, and he gives you a small smile and a nod, his hand extending out to gently take yours if you’ll let him. A chill runs through him when you indeed lace your fingers in his, pulling yourself up to walk your exhausted frames to the bedroom. He feels your face nuzzle into the muscle of his bicep, and he casts you a puzzled look.

“It’s going to take some time to trust you again,” you mumble softly, squeezing the muscles in his arm as if to plead him to not go away or chastise your ‘demands.’

Hardly demands, but he understands your hesitation.

“Yeah?” He hums, planting a kiss to your head. To make you laugh for the first time in hours, he gently tugs you closer to him and leans his entire weight on you, quickly swaying you both to flop onto the bed; this does have you giggling, pitching when the mattress squeals under the weight of both of you. He kisses your head once more, then moving his kiss to your lips, sighing when you reciprocate the affection back.

“The rest of your life sound okay?”

————

this is the ending I chose, if you don’t like it, I don’t know what to tell you 🥲🫡 but a part two wouldn’t have been possible without your encouragement and support, and I’m forever thankful for the encouragement from everyone who took the time to either want to be tagged, or read the piece whenever they get the chance.

Mwah 💋

@captainchrisstan

@soleilstice

@lucacangettathisass

@harukamisato

@i-x4o

@muite

#SHES COMPLETE 💅🏼 #god I love it and idc what you say #y’all better blow this up #sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x gn!reader #sakusa kiyoomi angst #sakusa kiyoomi x reader angst #sakusa kiyoomi haikyuu #sakusa #sakusa angst #sakusa x reader #sakusa x gn!reader #sakusa x reader angst #sakusa imagine #sakusa haikyuu #haikyuu #haikyuu angst #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x reader angst #haikyuu x gn!reader #haikyuu x gender neutral reader #haikyuu x yn #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #hurt/comfort #sakusa kiyoomi hurt/comfort

[lesinquietes]

But can you imagine being on discussion boards talking shit about the League of Villains after the whole Overhaul situation like “lol still got fucked by all might at kamino tho” and that being the ONE comment Shigaraki reads that sets him over the edge???

Inspired fic

⚠️ mdni. death (minor), degradation, kidnapping, mind break, noncon, oral, stalking, yandere.

Like, my man just fucking loses it, totally seething at the notion that there are still people out there who don’t take him seriously. So he doxes you and finds out where you live. If you don’t reside by yourself, god help your partner, roommate(s), or family members. Your pets, too. They’re all dust. He waits for you to get home like a parent catching their kid in the act of sneaking out.

And of course, you never thought your shitposting would result in this — the leader of the League of Villains showing up and committing personal crimes against you. You’re flabbergasted when you return to your residence and find him there, amidst the carnage he’s left. It destroys your mind. You’ll never be the same again. You’re wracking your memories, trying to recall if you ever had an encounter with Shigaraki. It’s only when he cackles hoarsely and grins beneath that big, ugly hand that you make the connection.

“Still don’t think I’m the real deal, sweetheart?”

He takes a daunting step towards you. You’re paralyzed with fear. He wants to teach you a lesson. He thinks he’ll remove a finger; maybe a limb. He’ll keep you alive so you can remember what he did to you.

But as he gets closer to you… he realizes you’re actually pretty cute. No, that’s not the right word; you’re fucking hot. You look like one of his favourite porn stars. It’s your face, it’s your body — he didn’t think you’d be this attractive in person. In fact, perhaps he’s been approaching this the wrong way.

You finch when he grasps your chin. He purposefully keeps one pinky dangling not too far from your cheek. If he wants to, he can kill you. The way your lower lip trembles oh so adorably tells him that you know how vulnerable you are. You have no clue he’s decided there’s a higher purpose for you. His crimson eyes narrow with cruel glee.

“I wonder how the world would feel if I took an innocent civilian as a pet?”

It’s the perfect plan. He has a pretty face to come home to. He has a warm hole to fuck whenever he wants. He corrupts you for society to see. You’ll be humiliated to the point of losing yourself, descending into madness as a martyr for all who doubted him. Yes, he thinks keeping you is a way better idea than dusting you.

The heights he goes to ensure you know your place are higher than you ever thought they’d be. He forces you to worship him. He makes you kiss and suck on his fingers — the very things that could end your life in a breath. On various occasions, he coaxes you into sucking him off on camera, so he can make a montage for when he reveals your broken mind to the world. It’s sick; he doesn’t debate that. He wants to put you through the worst. Not only does he get off on degrading pretty sluts like you, but he can wear you down this way.

Braindead and willing is how he wants you.

Braindead and willing is how he’ll have you.

#I’m howling at this thought hahahaha it’s so stupid #and yet I still somehow managed to jam smut into it #this is a shitpost guys I’m sorry #shigaraki x reader #shigaraki smut #yandere tomura shigaraki #tomura x reader #tw noncon #afab reader

[transmascissues]

every day i think about how my old psychiatrist (who was notoriously horrible on many levels, to be clear) tried to convince me to stay on the antidepressants i was coming off of when i told her i was starting testosterone because she was convinced that i’d be incapable of handling the “intense mood swings” that she said it would cause if i was unmedicated

mind you, i was coming off of these meds because they were doing absolutely fucking nothing for me and she had fought me on stopping them every step of the way — in her mind, me starting t was the perfect chance to make one final (transphobic) push against my desire to stop putting completely pointless drugs in my body

she consistently referred to hrt as me “going on steroids” and told me with every ounce of condescending concern she could muster that she had never had a patient start t without being on antidepressants (as if i was supposed to see that fact as anything other than further proof that her main goal as a psychiatrist was just to make as much money as possible by pushing meds on people)

i tried to explain to her that countless trans people i’d talked to had said that being on t made them feel more emotionally stable, not less, and that i had already chosen a method of hrt that would minimize hormonal fluctuations as much as possible, but she wouldn’t believe me — there’s no question in my mind that she just saw me as a ~naive little girl who didn’t understand how testosterone could make my life hell~

and of course, my mom jumped on that idea and started telling me about how it’s not that she doesn’t like that i’m trans, it’s just that she’s ~so worried~ about what the ~big bad testosterone~ might to to my ~poor fragile mental health~

and when i started t, i was terrified that they would be proven right

now i’m 5 months on t (and a few months post-ending that doctor-patient relationship as well) and what do you know? my mood is better than ever! my therapist (who has known me far longer and actually cares about my well-being) says she’s never seen me this happy, and that she feels like i’m actually living for the first time! it’s been incredible!

in fact, i’ve come to the realization that i most likely had premenstrual dysphoric disorder before t, and that it was contributing to a huge percentage of my mental breakdowns and suicidal thoughts, so it seems there were hormones causing mood swings that i couldn’t handle without proper treatment after all, but testosterone isn’t the cause of those issues — turns out it’s the treatment i desperately needed to manage them!

and after some research and hearing from other people, i’ve learned that it wasn’t all anecdotal after all, because some studies have actually found evidence to support the idea that testosterone has antidepressant effects — i told my therapist that testosterone felt the way the antidepressants i had been on were supposed to feel, but i had no clue there was science to back that up

so now i’m just left being endlessly furious with the way testosterone is demonized as some horrible poisonous drug that will destroy your mental health along with everything else in your life, because being on it has improved my quality of life exponentially and that alone makes being on it SO worthwhile, but no one ever gets to see that side of being on t because they’re so busy drumming up fear about how it’ll wreck your moods instead

of course, that’s not to say some people don’t experience serious mood swings on t, because i would never deny someone else’s experience with their own body and mind, and i think it’s important that people know those effects are possible when they start t

what i AM saying is that i would guess that if you looked at pure numbers, more people have probably had a really positive experience like mine than a seriously negative one, and it’s very telling that the negative ones are portrayed as a universal part of being on t despite seemingly being a smaller percentage when you actually talk to lots of trans people, while the positive ones are portrayed as a fluke at best and impossible or even deceptive at worst despite being a really common theme in trans people’s accounts of being on t

testosterone is medicine. testosterone is healing.

it doesn’t solve all our problems — i’m certainly far from cured of all my mental health issues — but it sure as hell lightens the load, and i’m sick and tired of people acting like it’s a horrible thing and not the fucking miracle worker that it is for some of us

#transandrophobia #transandromisia #transmisandry #virilmisia #virilphobia #trans men #transmascs #testosterone #hrt

[bellewintersroe]

Jenson Button x FamousReader!2009

this is like a second part (can be read individually) to THIS. Here’s just some more headcannons of what it would be like when Jenson is in a relationship with a famous British celeb who’s extremely popular, especially amongst the party scene. warnings: mentions of sex, oral sex, nothing too graphic but I just knowww Jenson gets down and dirty. mentions of alcohol and some drug use? not to glamorise it we all know celebs ain’t innocent ok. for this case 18+ 😇

Jenson is a cutie ok, the more he falls in love with his SO the more he finds himself looking out for her in the garage. Whether this be before or after his race, just imagine his head poking out of his car, or he’s fully suited, helmet still on, glimpsing around trying to find her.

lots of cuddles, he’d keep an arm slung around her, especially if they’re in public where there’s paparazzi- in that case he’s keeping an extra tight grip on her.

despises the paparazzi ok- he’s a polite man, pretty tame, but British press in the 2000s were VILE and for his girlfriend, he can’t stand the idea of them even looking at her.

helps shields her eyes when the flashes are too bright.

Taxis home together at questionable hours of the morning, limbs sprawled over each other and getting caught snogging in the backseats.

drunk sex- especially when he wins the championship, he’s so smug and proud, fucking into her with all his energy, cos he’s world champion baby 😏. lovesss seeing her legs pinned up over his shoulders.

thanks his girl publicly after he wins his championship.

as I mentioned in the part prior to this, Jenson LOVES going on holiday with her, like he’s a bit of a perv when it comes to seeing y/n in a bikini, especially after he’d already seen to many shoots of her before even meeting each other.

never admits to being a fanboy of her but the smirk would say otherwise.

getting down and dirty on a yacht, hidden by a beach towel whilst he fingers her, he has his sunnies on and he’s smirking, pressing kisses to her temple and whispering sweet nothings.

“you’re doing so good aren’t you?” “all these people taking pictures of you and nobody has a clue what we’re doing.” “should put on a show for them, shouldn’t we?”

so mf dirty, his British accent makes it 10x sexier too.

sex in the pool of a yacht, and every single room in there, wants to try everything with her, but he isn’t pushy in the slightest- Jenson wouldn’t ever come close to making her feel uncomfortable.

They’d deffo see pictures released of them both the next day and giggle because nobody would have a clue what was happening under that towel.

can be really soft in sex, like stroking her face, talking her thru it -omfg I need him.

Deffo wants to try like anal, and certain kinks- I feel like she would too, idk when they’re both drunk they’d decide they wanna try something and sometimes it’s an utter fail.

other times it’s just giggly, exciting sex where they’re both eating fucking whipped cream off one another or something.

soft, gentle moans from him, especially when the sex is more passionate, when it’s rougher I feel like he’d be quiet but let out some grunts whenever he’s out of breath or gets really into it.

He’s a sucker when she goes down on him, like he’s a mess omg- if there’s one way to elicit moans from him that’s exactly how and she’s soooo good at it- he makes plenty of public innuendos about this.

I feel like y/n would wear the smallest little mini skirts, like she’s a Y2K queen and befriends lots of other wags at this stage- constantly pictures walking around the paddock looking cool asf.

Deffo a trend setter, but they’re the type of couple in 15 years that the younger generation look at and go ‘they’re together?!?’

as they get older they deffo become more private, but not secretive.

can spot each other in a crowd instantly, when he wins a race you best expect him to practically JUMP onto her, sometimes he forgets he’s bigger than her lmao.

The cameras go CRAZY for this and their faces are printed all over the newspapers.

Quiet, lazy mornings in England, especially when it’s cold out and Jenson finally has time off- the two of them can really appreciate the quiet side of life at home.

makes him want to settle down- but I think he’d be worried at first about bringing a child into the world- they’re having too much fun with each other, but I think they would calm down after a few years.

occasional bickers, maybe they both walk out of a nightclub and she’s storming ahead of him with a face like a slapped arse. Jenson would make a comment and y/n would be pissed that all the onlookers heard.

Y/n and Jenson’s relationship on the rocks?!

bitch the next morning he’s on top of her having the best make up sex ever.

Seriously their stamina is insane so they fuck like rabbits.

I feel like because y/n maybe has grown up in the public eye? Or fame came in her teens, her behaviour can be fairly erratic at times- like especially before Jenson the partying and boozing was out of control, but being a few years older he really settles her down in life.

like not that she’s troubled (I’m not gonna glamorise it but it’s real life) but it can’t be easy dealing with everything and fame at a young age, I feel like Jenson would take care of her at times, like if she gets wayyyy to drunk he wouldn’t lecture her, but he’d deffo have this sad look on his face, clearly he’s worried.

she’s ok tho, especially with him and like I said she settles down and matures a lot with Jenson.

She’d probs smoke weed every now and then and idk if Jenson would like it, especially when he’s so focused on racing, but he tries it once or twice and would probs just fall asleep immediately.

I feel like he’s so cuddly at times, like in the middle of the night he’d just snuggle up to her. So cute. On holiday on sunbeds he’d be so cuddly, grabbing at her and it causes for some really cute paparazzi pictures.

not to glamorise droogz and drinking but them two probably party a lot in the first year together.

Jenson is the type to eye his gf up from the other side of the room, nods her over or something sexy.

hand would start on your shoulder and end up on her ass- so many headlines the next day…

But yeah they’re such a popular, attractive couple, you either want to be with them or want to be them.

#jenson button x reader smut #jenson button smut #f1 smut #f1 x reader smut #f1 x reader #Jenson button x reader

[turbulentscrawl]

HELLOOO could we get ithaqua with a modern Reader too? :33

MWehehe

-Honestly, not the brightest idea for a modern S/O to try and get with his one. Modern social culture is very deep in the anti-toxicity (to the point that we circle back into it without realizing sometimes) and Ithaqua exhibits a lot of red-flag buzzwords. He’s the kind of person reddit would constantly tell you to divorce haha.

-He would be a bit torn over you, though. On one hand, you clearly lived emersed in “society” as a whole, which is what he was generally the most at odds with in life. (In a modern setting, Ithaqua would be an off-grid homesteader. He’s probably against having wifi at his home, even.) On the other hand…you’re a bit of an outcast in the survivor manor. He’s a little crazy, but not BLIND. He can see how people are nervous about you in the beginning, shun you and your magic box.

-He’s got no fucking clue what the magic box is either, but Ithaqua does not believe in magic, religion, or the paranormal. The people who dictate those things called his mother a witch, and himself a demon, and he knows in his heart that they were just two people living life in a way others didn’t like. Superstition is what got him dumped in the snow as a babe, so even if he’s confused as hell by your technology, he’s smart and reasonable enough to know it’s due to a lack of education on his part and not you being some otherworldly, incomprehensible thing.

-He’s likely drawn to you a bit from the above treatment you suffer. Maybe the others are more than willing to use you as bait, hesitant to rescue you, or fail to even explain to you how decoding works. Ithaqua will notice these things even in the middle of a hunt. He thinks you’re pitiful—until you’re not, and that makes you interesting. Ithaqua finds the remnants of whatever your modern-ness makes up your skills. Your phone tucked into a grassy corner, playing a recording of someone shuffling through a chest, maybe, and he picks it up curiously. And then, well, he has to return it to you. Unfortunately for you, he’s one of the faster hunters and this only delays him for a few seconds.

-Ithaqua starts to, frankly, bully you in matches. He’s less vicious with the damage done, and instead of chairing you off the bat, he takes a liking to carrying you around while he hunts your teammates. It doesn’t matter that you struggle free or self-heal sometimes, he can catch you again easily enough. He talks to you while he zips around after everyone, his usual giggles and sighs replaced with questions and commentary for you. You reach a point one day where you self-heal, but don’t bother running…and Ithaqua just grins like a shark and pats you on the head.

-Eventually he notices the others warming up to you better…and it makes him bitter. “They’re all hypocrites,” he tells you in a dark corner of the basement. “I treated you like everyone else from the start, didn’t I?” That’s his argument to endear himself to you. To coil you further around his (admittedly gentle, all things considered) finger. Yes, he hit you, hunted you, but that’s his job. The POINT, he says, is that he likes you and it’s not FAKE because he’s always seen you as an equal to the others. (To the survivors, not to himself, because the manor roles say you’re clearly not.)

-The POINT is that you shouldn’t fully trust the rest of them—they’ll turn on you again if they get spooked—but him? Ithaqua doesn’t get spooked. He gets…possessive. He likes you. He’ll be here, if you need him. And even if you don’t. He’ll take care of your troubles for you, sweet pet.

#idv x reader #identity v #idv ithaqua #idv night watch #ithaqua x reader #turbulentscrawl

[bao3bei4]

why zines? how zines?

i was on a panel at fanworks con 2023 about zines today. it was a lot of fun! i decided to turn my portion of the talk into a post for my friends who couldn’t make it to the panel. 

this post includes my thoughts on: 

why make a zine

how to generate ideas for zines

how to finish your zines

how to build an audience for your zines

so why zines? what are they? [ZEENS, rhymes with beans], pronounced that way because it’s a shortened form of the word magazine, are basically just that: self published magazines. but why make a zine over, say, a blog post? or any other piece of art. 

i have basically three reasons. the first is that making little books is cool. it’s genuinely awesome to make physical zines and have the product of your labor in your hand. it’s a great feeling to finish a project and feel a concrete reward, and a lot of times we don’t get that in our lives.

the second reason is that zines give you absolute editorial control. you can put anything you want on a page. whatever layout, whatever order, whatever fold, whatever content. you name it, you can do it. this is something other venues rarely give you. for artists, it’s phenomenal. and for the rest of us, it gives us the ability to become artists for a little bit, as we lay things out.

the third reason is that zines can be absolute shit. in fact, the more shit they are, the more diy and punk they are. they have an incredible lineage of stolen copy paper and anarchist politics. all that to say, is that there are no standards. the zine ethos is say what you wanna say. it’s tremendously freeing to go fuck polish and respectability, i’m making my project.

because of these three reasons, i want to encourage you to get started making zines by describing common challenges and worries and giving you several practical tips for each on working past them. so, in order, they’re “i don’t know what to make a zine about,” “i struggle to finish projects,” and “no one will read my zines.” let’s get into it.

first up, “i don’t know what to make a zine about.” i think this one is pretty common, even for experienced zine creators. sometimes you’re in the mood to make things but you have no clue what. a lot of people suggest to just go with random words or whatever pops into your head, but i’m picky! i find that unsatisfying! so here are some tips for people in the same boat. 

ONE: what’s distracting you? work with it. because anything can be a zine, let the things you’ve already done serve as inspiration. photos you’ve taken can be formatted into a zine. is there a game sucking up your attention? make a zine about it. the song stuck in your head can turn into a lyricbook, forgotten works in progress or sketches can be resurrected, cannibalized, or even published as incomplete zines. if you’ve been busy with real life, maybe the recipes you’ve been making—even if, especially if, they’re struggle meals, can turn into zines. interview your most interesting friend. summarize a book you read recently. even if you’ve just been doomscrolling, that’s a zine too! i got a zine last weekend called bay area newsreel which was collecting recent articles about local news from leftist perspectives gathered up into a handy volume. your attention is a gift, so look at what zine fodder it’s accumulated for you naturally. 

SECOND: add a twist. sometimes i have an idea but it isn’t quite right. it just seems too straightforward. so i try to develop along a single axis of content or form. what this means is basically go against your instincts, or rather, your first impulse. that first idea is very hard to walk away from, but doing so often gives you an idea that gets you unstuck. so for content, add a different perspective. for me this is often a theoretical approach. when i was stuck on my scum villain zine, turning it into freud zine let the words start flowing. next, on form: present it differently than your first instinct is to. if my first thought is “essay,” i try to figure out how to chunk out the information into modules or how to add interactivity or what kind of illustrations to add. if my first thought is “this could be a fic or comic,” i try turning it into an essay. saying things a different way often gives you a new perspective on the content as well. 

THIRD: copy! make your take on the same thing as someone else. it’s not stealing—well, ideally it isn’t. make your original take and give credit where credit is due and ask permission if necessary. but engage with the medium!!! making zines without reading zines is the same thing as trying to write a paper without citing sources, or a novel without reading your contemporaries. that is, you can do it, but it’s hard. zines are a genre into themselves so figure out how to situate yourself in their ongoing dialogue. an example of this from my own practice is that i own a zine about queer gods and mythological creatures from chinese history. reading it i was like. why don’t they talk about this. why don’t they talk about that. and that became the basis for my own zine, guaitai the strange and the queer which focused on queer chinese history and literature instead. different zine, same inspiration. 

all of my ideas suppose you have SOMETHING going on. what if you truly have nothing. my advice? adapted from my “how to write an essay” blog post, is to read a book. read an article. read something. and then post about it. and then turn your posts into a zine. don’t start entirely from scratch — give yourself a scaffolding. so first. read something and tell someone about it. i wasn’t lying about calling myself a consummate poster. it’s a big part of my thought process. 

second up, what if “i struggle to finish projects.” i’m no stranger to having a bunch of half finished half started projects lying around. but here are some zine-specific tips i have for addressing that.

FIRST! go smaller; go shittier. reduce the scope of your projects. make one pagers, lists. once when i was feeling stymied, i made a physical zine about movies i’d watched that month, just listing them with a couple bullet points on each film. i eventually turned it into a bigger digital zine where i listed movies i’d watched over the past several months with more thoughts on them, and nicely formatted. but that was something that came out of reducing my scope from “i need to write a manifesto on a movie i’ve watched recently” to “well i can just tell people about it” to “i can say two things about it.” and something actually got finished.

SECOND. your friends are a great tool for accountability. something i like to do is zine jams with my friends. nothing fancy, it’s just we’ll sit down for an hour and go we’re going to make something in this hour. or, for a bigger scope, we might work separately but commit to making a zine that weekend. it’s nice to have community and it’s nice to feel a little bit of a friendly deadline. i recommend this even if you DON’T have problems finishing zines. it’s a good time. 

THIRD. a lot of times if the words aren’t coming easily, it’s because i’m not trying to say the right thing. keep in mind that your zines don’t have to be “content.” this little paper zine i made about movies wasn’t made to share online; in fact, it’s not available online. i didn’t make it according to what other people would see or be interested in. you can and will burn out on making “marketable” content. corollary to this: sometimes what i have to say is something i DON’T want to share online. it might not be that it’s boring, it might be that it’s too personal. and i share a lot online, i write personal essays after all. but some projects i stall on because they’re really just for me, and i’m again, focused on making content. so this piece of advice is about rejecting the tyranny of the imaginary audience. 

and the next challenge is about embracing that audience! what if no one reads your zines, something that’s entirely possible. well there’s plenty you can do about that.

FIRST. cultivate zine community. read other people’s zines! talk to them about their zines! this greatly increases the chance that they will do the same for you. don’t go in expecting reciprocity; do it for its own sake, but it’s a great place to start. try asking people at zine fests if they’d be willing to trade with you, for instance. 

SECOND. write for yourself. it’s cheesy but it’s true. you really have to. if you’re not proud and happy with what you’re making on its own merits, what’s the point. now because this is a cop out tip, i’m not counting it as a tip on its own. 

so SECOND PART TWO. make your zines more accessible. if they’re not free, make them free—yes, you deserve to be compensated for your work, but it’s up to you to decide if you want a bigger audience first. if your zines aren’t short, make them shorter. make them short enough that you can post their entirety on social media or something else easy for your audience to consume. it’s a big ask sometimes to get someone to download your pdf! if they’re physical, hand them out to people you meet. remove all the barriers to entry.

THIRD. related to this, change medium. if you’re not making physical zines, try printing them out. if you’re not making digital zines, try digitizing them. both of these offer access to new audiences and new people who might be more interested in one form than another. 

i hope these thoughts encourage you to make a zine! if you do, please let me see it. i love reading zines. 

#x