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hungercityhellhound · 2 years

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Things People Don’t Mention About Top Surgery or Mastectomies

There is reluctance to do the surgery if you live alone, even if you have a good support system. One of the most stressful things was the hospital constantly asking about who would be looking after me, picking me up, etc. I really felt the bias towards people who are married and against people who are single. I don’t think it was intentional but it was definitely there. (Please read more about this situation here) That being said you will definitely need a robust support system of some kind to get through everything in the first 4 -8 weeks or more after surgery.

All your pill bottles will have safety caps and you won't have the strength to open them on your own without a lot of struggling.

There are soooo many medications. Take them as prescribed and when they say take the level of pain meds you need to manage your pain, do it. I got opiods and ibuprofen. If the pain is bad 5-7+ on the 1-10 scale take the stronger meds. Pain can slow healing by causing stress on the body.

Drains are a pain in the ass. Every hour pushing the hoses so they don't clog. Major drag but they are very important and if they get clogged it can cause issues

Sleeping sitting up, prepare for this. Lots of pillows or recliner or something. Practice for a week or more before surgery to get used to it.

Sleep as much as you need. Don't feel like you should stay awake or whatever because you are supposed to or it is day time or whatever. Listen to your body.

Drink lots and lots of fluids. You may think you are drinking enough but you probably aren't. The fluid in the drains and the medicines and peeing all the time and sweating from the tight wrap. You need to replace all of this fluid. I think I have been up around 80+ oz the past few days.

The month before and a month after surgery eat a high protein and higher calorie diet. It will help with surgery and recovery. You need the energy and the protein to recover.

Cut out added salt, caffiene, alcohol, and nicotine before surgery and during recovery. All of these can increase fluid retention, slow healing, or be dangerous with the meds.

Your chest will feel very strange. At first you can't feel anything and then the skin feels tight everywhere and still strange. The recovery process feels real weird. Your whole torso feels kind of bizarre and new.

Ask all the questions. No question is stupid. It's trauma to your body ask all the questions. YES all of them.

The tube (intubation) from surgery irritates the throat. Coughing from this sucks so damned much because of the binder and the chest tightness and what not. Find lozenges (Both cough drops and just candy) that you like. I say candy because too many cough drops can upset the stomach and you don't need that after anesthesia and with all the meds. Also get popsicles.

Take everything out of packages you can before surgery. They are damned hard to open. Those paper cartons holding the apple sauce and snapping apart pudding cups and pulling apart pill blister packs.. ugh I should have taken them apart before the surgery.

Scissors are your friend and every package is an enemy. Seriously, get a good pair of scissors for packaging.

Also, skip 2 liters of pop, gallon of milk, etc. They will be too heavy to pick up after surgery. You can be more independent if you get smaller size things.

Timers are your friend. All the phone timers forever. Also, handwritten or some other chart type to keep track of drain cleaning and taking meds. You will be sleepy and forgetful the first few days. Use other things to help you keep track.

Take stock of how your lights go on and off. Can you reach them while pretending you are a T-Rex. If not, especially ceiling fans and that, put long strings on the pulls so that you can operate them while you can't raise your arms.

Also check your doors to make sure they don't stick. You won't be able to tug hard on doors or drawers or whatever.

Get yourself some treats. Food related or clothing or whatever. Treats will help.

Before surgery plan out and prepare at least a week of meals. Be sure to include some that are easy on the stomach like crackers, rice and chicken, etc. Just in case you have stomach upset from the anesthesia or meds. Gentle foods include starches and chicken/tofu that is low fat and low spice so that it is gentle.

Soft fuzz free and easy to get on clothing is essential. I went out and got a couple of those shorts and button down shirt pajama sets. Life savers. Also, get a size or two bigger than usual to accommodate drains and padded bandages and things.

Strange pains, you will probably have them.

Be sure to do the arm exercises as directed by your surgeon and watch your shoulders hunching. The shoulder hunching is from the chest tightness but you don't want your back to start hurting. Try to sit up as straight as you can.

Pump action soap dispensers will be too hard to use the first few days.

Weeks before surgery, start teaching yourself how to do things without your arms; like standing up, getting into and out of bed, squatting, getting up from chairs, etc. Practice doing things with your elbows next to your chest like a t-rex; getting food and drinking, brushing teeth, taking meds, etc This will be very important

I am sure there are more but I thought some of you might benefit from the things I have learned so far from going through surgery.

#Mastectomy #Top Surgery #Trans #Transition #Tips

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zorrasucia · 5 months

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Teach Me Tonight - Part 4

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Deleted Scene] Part 4: [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] [Deleted Scene] [Part 8]

Reader x Carmy Berzatto (The Bear FX)

Rating: Explicit (4k)

Tags: Smut, Set sometime after the opening of The Bear, Porn with a little plot, Virgin!Carmy, Sex Toys, P in V sex, Mutual Masturbation, Bondage but they're really tame about it, Both Carmy and Reader have a bit of a praise kink

Summary: Carmy's eyebrows arched in surprise once he saw the contents of the box, accompanied by a pink colored brochure with more options of toys, and big, bold slogans about thrusting and G spots. "Oh. That's intense," he said, not repulsed but definitely taken aback.

A couple of boxes had arrived at the store early in the morning. You were sorting their contents when Carmy walked in through the back door.

"I'll be with you in a minute, babe," you said, leaving a peck on Carmy's cheek.

"Take your time," Carmy eyed the new merch, his tattooed fingers running over the wool of a blue sweater - one you had picked out for his Christmas present knowing it would make his eyes look stunning. You bit your bottom lip to contain a satisfied smile.

"What's this one? Jewelry?"

When you turned around, Carmy was holding a small cardboard box, shaking it lightly by his ear. Your heart started racing when you realized what it was.

"Um, actually, that's a surprise," you cleared your throat. "For you. Well us. But we'll open it later, okay?"

"Now I'm curious," he grabbed you by the waist, pulling you away from the counter and closer to him. You ran your fingers through the hair on the nape of his neck.

"Well, if you weren't so damn nosy..." you said playfully.

"Fuck off," he said without bite. "You like my nose."

You nuzzled against it, then kissed him sweetly.

"I do," you admitted. "Now come on, I'll see you tonight."

He left begrudgingly, but not before he gave you a bruising kiss.

When Carmy arrived home, you took him to the bedroom and placed the cardboard box on his lap. He smirked. While he was opening it, you started getting nervous and second-guessing yourself. Men could get very defensive when it came to sex toys.

"This isn't, like, a jab or anything," you said quickly. "It's just something new to try for fun, you know?"

You didn't lack novelty in the bedroom. Maybe it was because Carmy was new to sex but he was willing to try most things. You had to squeeze your thighs at the memory of him fucking you against the bathroom wall, angled precisely so you could both see your reflection in the mirror as he buried himself deep inside you.

Carmy's eyebrows arched in surprise once he saw the contents of the box, accompanied by a pink colored brochure with more options of toys, and big, bold slogans about thrusting and G spots.

"Oh. That's intense," he said, not repulsed but definitely taken aback.

"So I didn't know what you'd like, I'm guessing you don't know either," Carmy hummed in agreement. "So, uh, I bought a couple of things I wanted to try. You can choose next time, if you want," you offered sheepishly, taking out one of the two gifts you had ordered and handing it to Carmy.

"It's a ring," he said, his Adam's apple bobbing as he felt it buzz on his palm. "And that's-"

"A vibrator, uh, for me... It's got a remote and everything so you can, uh, you know, control it too," you had seen the way Carmy's eyes darkened when he made you come before he did. It was that selflessness you loved but also something hungry and dark that made your knees buckle. "That is if you want..."

"Jesus, yes!" Carmy replied, flustered.

"Okay," you sighed with relief and grinned. "Okay! And, uh, if we like it, you can pick the next one."

"I'd like that," Carmy took a quick look at the brochure, slightly less intimidated than when he had just opened the box. "Just a quick question," he stared at the section dedicated to rabbits and dildos. "That goes inside you?"

You laughed. "Yeah, I thought it was pretty self explanatory."

He chuckled and covered his face, probably the reddest you had ever seen him. "No, yeah, I know. It's just- Does it, you know, fit?"

You took the brochure from his hands and squinted to see the measurements.

"It's not that much bigger than your cock, Carm." you flirted.

"Really?"

"Really," you knelt next to him on the mattress, a hand on his upper thigh and your lips ghosting over his ear. "So..."

"Uh- can I watch?" he asked, his voice quiet as he handed you the smooth vibrator. "Just for a little while. Then, I'd like to try that," he pointed at the remote, a little quiver in his voice.

It was thrilling, knowing he desired you and your pleasure that much.

"Yes."

He started kissing and undressing you, hands kneading on your ass and thighs, lips kissing your chest. Once he got rid of your jeans he looked up at you expectantly.

You placed the vibrator over your underwear, teasing with the lowest setting, going around your whole pussy, feeling yourself get wet as you stared into Carmy's eyes - he licked his lips. You nudged your underwear lower and lower, halfway down your thighs, clicking the vibrator one notch harder.

"Oh," you moaned and arched your back, something red and hot boiling in your veins.

Carmy's hands caressed the inside of your legs and thighs, taking your underwear off completely, opening you wide. "Can I?"

You handed him the controller, your heart racing. His fingers hovered over the buttons.

"Be nice," you pleaded - though a secret part of you wanted to see how bad he could actually be. If his dark eyes were any indication he was toeing that line between loving and feral that made sex with him so delicious. "Actually, no. Don't be nice. Just have fun with it," you let out a breathy laugh.

"Let me know if you don't like something, anything," he asked softly.

"Yeah," you exhaled.

"Okay," he turned it up for a moment and then turned it off. You let out a needy whine. He kissed the inside of your calf, soothing. "I want it to last. You look so good, sound so good."

He went back to teasing, then slowly to a rhythm that made you roll your eyes and hips, and just to the edge of your release and back down.

You let out a frustrated noise, desperate as you ground against the now perfectly still vibrator.

"I can't believe you're edging me without me teaching you what that is," you complained half-heartedly, wiping beads of sweat from your forehead.

Carmy was giving you a moment to catch your breath while he undressed, staring at you hungrily the whole time. His cock was hard and leaking in his boxer briefs.

"You're so good," he said softly, sitting back in front of you, turning the vibrator back on, up and up, making you writhe against the sheets and moan loudly. Your jaw was slack and your free hand was grabbing at the sheets. "My good girl," he said, ears pricked up for the drawn out moan he knew would follow.

"Please, please," you met his eyes. "Please."

"Good girl," he repeated, going up a notch and watching you come, legs shaking and high-pitched screams leaving your lips. Your hips thrust with a will of their own as you rode it out, trembling with pleasure. Carmy's eyes were on you as you started breathing normally again and took the vibrator off your clit.

"Shit," you sighed. Your fingers grazed over your hard nipples, finding electricity wherever you touched. You would need a little while to be functional again.

"D'you like it?" you mumbled, eyes half-lidded.

"Did I like it?" Carmy repeated then moved on top of you, strong arms holding him up as he kissed you senseless. His curls had become loose and they tickled your forehead. "I loved it so fucking much. So much."

He kissed the side of your face vehemently, like a man starved and you hummed contentedly. He ground into your hips a little.

"Give me a minute," you said softly. You were definitely wet enough to do just about anything Carmy could want but the world was still spinning a little. "I'll fuck you in a second," you joked breathily.

"Sorry," he chuckled into your neck. "Be right back," he kissed your temple and padded out of the room.

He returned with a glass of water and condoms.

"My hero," you teased, drinking eagerly while you watched him take off his boxers and pump himself a couple of times. The sight made you wetter if that was even possible - the prospect of fucking Carmy making you wild with need. "Your turn. Put that condom on," you said, reaching over for the cock ring.

"Oh," Carmy frowned once the toy was on him. "Feels weird."

"Bad weird?" you asked.

"Weird weird," he laughed, moving awkwardly to turn it on. "Fuck, never mind," he exhaled, eyes rolling back.

You caressed him - his shoulders, his chest. "Too much?" you asked after a moment of him being very still and quiet.

"No, it's good, it's good," he replied dreamily, going back to his place above you, lowering himself into your pussy. You moaned loudly at the immediate feeling of fullness, the easy glide of his cock inside you, and the vibration against your clit.

"Fuck, that's perfect," he slurred, overwhelmed. His brow furrowed in concentration as he was overcome with pleasure. "Shit. I can't move," he admitted.

"Wanna switch?" you offered gently.

"Yes. Yes, please. Fuck," he pulled out of you, falling on the mattress, that same stunned expression returning to his face as you lowered yourself on his cock.

"Shit," you keened. The angle made the ring hit exactly on the perfect spot of your clit, your thighs were shaking and you hadn't even begun to ride him. "I'm not going to last, Carm."

"Neither am I," there was a sense of relief as he said it and chuckled. His hands squeezed at your hips with desperation. "Please."

You started moving back and forth, making Carmy squeeze his eyes shut, his breath coming in heavy exhales as you let out needy noises.

"Holy fucking shit," he said, finally opening his eyes, following your breasts as they bounced up and down while you rode him harder and harder.

"You're ruining me," he managed, his hand reaching for yours, calloused fingers keeping you grounded. "Ruining me completely."

You couldn't speak; every coherent thought was replaced with Carmy - his face, his voice, his tattoos, his smell, his body...

You felt him growing tense underneath you, his muscles taut as his cock twitched inside you. You could hear Carmy panting and growling, his chest rising quickly under your palms. Exhausted, you stopped riding him and leant forwards, into Carmy's chest and open arms, your pussy directly on the cock ring.

"Oh my- Oh my God," you gasped and trembled through a blinding orgasm while Carmy held you tight. Everything was white and hot and your ears were buzzing. You kept rutting into his hips, shaking with ecstasy for what felt like a very long time. Carmy's hands went from your spine down your ass and back up, then gently caressed the curve of your waist.

After a while you winced at the vibration underneath you. Carmy rolled you to your side, sliding his softening cock out of you. You saw him take off the ring and discard the condom in a haze.

"You okay?" he asked. His eyes were back to that soft, blue worry you loved so much. You cupped the side of his face.

"I'm perfect," you replied, out of breath. "You?"

"I'm good," he smiled. "That was-"

"Amazing," you supplied.

"I was going to say fucking insane but amazing works."

You giggled into his shoulder. He took your hand and held it close to his chest. You could feel his pulse still racing.

The walk to Carmy's apartment was more quiet than usual. His arm was around you, warm but a little tense.

"You okay?" you asked, raising your hand to interlock with his.

"Yeah," he exhaled, "can't wait to get home is all."

You leaned deeper into his side. "Bad day?"

Carmy let out a chuckle. "Actually it was fine," he cleared his throat. "No, I got something in the mail this morning."

"Okay," you waited but he didn't say anything else. You stared as he got the keys out and opened the door.

You walked in, and as soon as the door closed, he started kissing your neck, hugging you from behind, breathing heavily into your hair.

"What's gotten into you?" you giggled, turning around to return his kisses, pressing against him greedily.

"Can you stay the night?" he asked instead.

"Of course, yeah," you replied against his lips. You practically lived there but he was always nice enough to ask when sex might be on the table.

"Good," he sighed, his forehead to yours.

He swayed you both slowly to the couch. On the coffee table there was a package.

"Open it," he said with a faint smile, fingers tapping nervously on his knee.

"Is this-?" you arched your eyebrow. He nodded.

Carmy hadn't taken you on the offer to let him pick your next toys... Until now, it seemed.

You rummaged through the box and touched metal and leather. Handcuffs. You had never fantasized about being tied up but you could be persuaded - maybe. You studied them in the light, they seemed sturdy and there was padding to stop you from getting hurt. Still...

"We'll have to talk about this, Carm. I trust you. Completely. It's just-" you started, watching him tilt his head in confusion as you talked.

"Oh, no. I mean, we can definitely talk about it," he said gently, "but those are for me."

You stared at him with wide eyes, something warm settling inside your belly.

"Is that okay?" he asked when you were quiet for a moment too long.

You pictured him, toned arms above his head, pupils dilated, writhing on the bed as you had your way with him...

"Yeah," you replied breathily. "That would be- fuck- I think I would be into that."

He smiled.

"This one's for you," he said then, handing you a pink rabbit vibrator. You recognized it as the one Carmy had asked about weeks ago - it was bigger than him but only a little. "I don't know how it works exactly but, uh-"

You tested a few of the buttons and found the vibration settings for the dildo and the clit bit. You were already biting on your lip at the thought of using it when you found out the dildo moved on its own.

"Shit," you said.

"It can fuck you," Carmy added, his voice low.

Your mind started racing at the prospect of having the toy inside you while you sucked Carmy off. Something to think about for later.

"Do you, uh, do you have anything planned for tonight?" you asked.

"Uh, kind of," he hesitated.

"Tell me."

Carmy loved having a plan. You closed your thighs in anticipation.

"I want you to cuff me to the bed."

"Okay." Pretty straightforward.

He gestured at the vibrator. "And I want you to fuck yourself with it. I want you to enjoy yourself and cum as many times as you want. And I want to watch."

Your throat went dry at his confident delivery. When you had started fucking Carmy, what felt like ages ago, he was the one blushing at things, going along with the plan. This was different - he was telling you what he wanted, he was in charge. Even if he wasn't going to be able to touch you.

"How will you-?"

"Cum?" Carmy ended for you.

"Well, yeah. I want you to enjoy yourself too, Carm." You loved the plan so far but you weren't sure it was a fair deal.

"That's what you're worried about?" he asked incredulously. "I don't think you know the effect you have on me. The times I've had to stop myself from enjoying too much when I hear you or see you while we fuck," your stomach fluttered. He wasn't always so open. It felt like you had stumbled into something very intimate, except he had taken you there willingly. "Baby, I'll be fine."

You got closer to him. You didn't really know what to say in return so you just caressed him, his face, his hair, his shoulders. You searched for his eyes and found something fierce, something so like love...

"Tell you what," he said after a while. "If I haven't finished by the time you want to untie me, we can fuck and call it even?"

It seemed almost silly, to have him offer that, like you were haggling, like he was appeasing you, but you agreed nevertheless.

"Deal," you gave him a little peck to settle it. "I still think I'm fucking scamming you but whatever."

That made him chuckle.

"Come on," he pressed another kiss on your lips and started walking to the bedroom, his silhouette undressing beckoning you like a siren's song.

You found him shirtless, laying on his back, his jeans half unbuttoned.

"Fuck," you said softly, your hands fidgeting with the handcuffs. "Are we doing safe words and shit?"

"Sounds like a good idea," he agreed.

"We can do green, yellow and red, you know? Green if everything is fine, red if you want me to stop and untie you," you had read about it ages ago, probably in Cosmo magazine or some shit like that but it was better than nothing.

Carmy nodded and offered his wrists to you.

You bit your lip in concentration as you tightened the right cuff. "Yeah?"

"A little tighter," Carmy said. His Adam's apple bobbed when you pulled on the strap. "Mhmm, that feels better."

You secured the chain to the bed, your heart racing all the while.

"Hey, you okay?" Carmy asked, his blue eyes searching for yours. You realized your hands were shaking.

"Nervous," you admitted. "Never done this before."

Carmy used his free hand to cup your face. "Bad nervous? We can stop right now."

You leaned into his touch - he was warm.

"Good nervous, I think," your underwear was damp from you talking about it, you had to at least give it a go. "I'll tell you if it gets too much."

Saying that, you kissed his palm and secured the left cuff.

You started undressing, there, sat by Carmy. His eyes followed every move. You stared right back - the strain on his arms, the tiny wrinkle between his eyebrows, his soft mouth agape. He looked beautiful, straight out of a painting, except he was breathing heavily. He shivered when your cardigan grazed his skin as you threw it out of the way.

You stopped at your bra, then discarded your boots and jeans. The vibrator was on the other side of the bed, so you leaned over Carmy to reach it, your hair tickling at his stomach. He hummed.

You leaned in to kiss him: hot, full of tongue, then stopped and moved out of his reach.

"Like that," he said softly, some reassurance that this was exactly what he wanted. You smiled and turned the vibration on.

You moved it over your body, on your stomach, over the inside of your thighs. You were taking your sweet time. You took off your bra and caressed your nipples with the tip of it, a drowned out moan leaving your lips.

"Yes," Carmy said, his voice was close to that feral growl that made you curl your toes.

Finally, you placed it between your legs.

"Fuck," you hummed, getting rid of your underwear as quickly as you could, wetting the toy with your arousal. Carmy probably had lube on his bedside table but you didn't want to move, not when he was looking at you like that. His eyes were wide open and you knew that if he wasn't tied up he would be on top of you already, pounding into your pussy hard and fast. You bit your lip - you wanted it.

You shifted on the mattress until you were in full display in front of him and aligned the toy with your entrance.

"Eyes on me," Carmy said, his voice hoarse. A shiver went down your body. You got that delicious fullness while looking at Carmy; it felt right and good.

Once the dildo was inside you, it all became a blur. You let yourself lose control, selfishly seeking your pleasure. You got even more turned on by the sight of Carmy tied up, arms flexing.

"Is this what you want?" you said between gasps, searching the blue of his eyes, feeling your first orgasm approaching rapidly. "Oh, fuck, fuck- Carmy..."

You drew out his name into a moan, one hand pushing the dildo into you, the other playing with your nipples. You kept going, staring at him, the delicious V of his stomach as he thrust his hips into nothing.

"Pleeeease," he keened. He was desperate, his neck strained when he arched into the bed.

The room was hot, filled with sweat and moans from the two of you. You came and you muffled the cry that followed into your forearm.

"Let me hear you," Carmy asked with urgency once it was over. "Please, come again and let me hear you."

You climbed up the bed and gave him the sloppiest kiss, drunk with pleasure, licking into his mouth.

"Yes, anything you want," you said, your lips on the side of his face. Then, you leaned back, just out of his reach, and started thrusting against the dildo, there, still straddling his torso, making a mess of arousal and sweat on his abs. You could feel the rhythm of him fucking into nothing just behind you. Your moans came almost in unison.

"You look so beautiful, so beautiful," he mumbled, his eyes glassy.

You went quicker, emboldened by his praise, feeling your pussy flutter against the dildo. "I feel so good."

"Cum, baby, please," he blurted out.

And you did. And you kept going. Your moans turned into whines and then quiet sobs as the orgasm went on and on. You squeezed your eyes shut, overwhelmed.

"You're doing so good," you could hear Carmy through a fog of lust. "Sound so beautiful. I could die here, I swear..."

Slowly, the waves of pleasure became gentler, the vibration inside you just a soft hum, and you opened your eyes to Carmy's bessoted face. He stared like you were a beautiful work of art or a stunning sunset. It was everything.

You leaned forward, kissing his face, licking the salt off his skin, running your hands up his muscular arms, moaning softly as you took the dildo out.

"Did you finish?" you slurred into his ear.

"It doesn't matter," he said earnestly, his tone soft.

And you smiled, kissing the side of his face, less lust drunk and more devoted as you went. You left kisses on every tattoo you could find. You loved him so much.

"Can I touch you? Please," you begged.

"Yeah," he exhaled into your hair.

You reached down, between your legs, under his jeans and boxers, and started caressing his cock. It was tenting his clothes and leaking with precum.

"You're so hard, Carm," you whispered. "You've been so good. Let me take care of you."

He groaned at your gentle touch.

"Baby..."

"Carmy," you called, your free hand caressing his chest, lightly pinching his nipple.

"Oh, fuck," his jaw went slack. "Keep doing that."

You slid downwards, started kissing on his chest, licking at his nipples, and raking your nails down his ribs.

"Jesus, fuck!" he thrust into your hand forcefully and shook the chain of the handcuffs. "Take these off. Please. Jesus."

You straightened up and stopped touching him, making him whine in response.

"You sure?" you asked.

"Yes! Red or whatever the fuck we said," he panted. "I need to hold you."

You freed him from the handcuffs as fast as you could. Once the first one was off, he rushed to help you, throwing them across the bedroom when he was done.

"Thank fuck!" he said and immediately brought you down to hold you close, lying back with you on top.

He kissed you hungrily, tongue first, mouth open. He ran his hands up your spine, squeezed your ass, caressed your legs, worshipping every inch of skin he could touch. You went back to pumping his cock, grinding into his jeans, your forearm grazing on your pussy and sending little shocks of pleasure as you went.

"Fuck," he moaned into your mouth. "I'm so fucking in love with you. Love you so fucking much."

"I love you. I love you," you said right back.

Your hand pumped faster and faster, he was close.

You made him lose control with one nipple in your mouth and the other held tight in your free hand.

"Son of a bitch," he cursed and came in his stomach and your hand. You kissed his chest one last time.

"That's new," you said, pumping his cock a couple of more times then letting go. You settled next to him on the bed, wiped your hand on the bedsheets and made yourself comfortable on his pillow.

"What is?" Carmy asked, breathless.

"You don't say 'son of a bitch'. You're more of a 'jesus christ' and 'fuck' kind of guy," you said smiling.

Carmy chuckled. "Yeah, you're right."

"And," you emphasized, "you like nipple play."

"I didn't know that about myself either," he exhaled. He turned on his side to have a better view of you. He was sweaty and gorgeous. You held his hand in between the mess of sheets you had both made.

"I can't believe I was right about you," you said after what felt like a long time. Carmy was only half awake by now.

"Mmm?" Carmy rubbed your knuckles, soothing.

"You do like kinky shit."

He hid a sleepy grin behind his hand and brought you closer.

"Fuck off," he said into your hair, sweetly, the rhythm of his breath lulling you to sleep.

[Deleted Scene]

[Part 5]

#this smut is brought to you by bellesa's instagram page 🥵🥵🥵(completely unhinged and sex positive confessions/tips/ads for toys 10/10)#also that gq photoshoot with jeremy allen white in the crop top jesus fucking christ 🥵#carmen berzatto x reader #carmy x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto fanfiction #carmen berzatto x you #carmy berzatto x you #carmy x you #carmy berzatto smut

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