#tis my own fault tho

[inamagicalhallucination]

ok gift giving is a big part of atsushi’s love language 

this wasn’t meant to be long but-

whether its becuz the tiger’s cat-desire to hunt for the agency translated to something more human (along with cooking but my cooking atsushi headcanons will pop out sometime else) or just becuz atsushi has never been gifted anything pre-agency and to him its something very precious who knows

it’s not that he spends ages pouring over what to give the agency members (well not always) its more like if he goes to the store and sees a type of candy ranpo likes he’ll buy it for him

when atsushi’s new at wanting to give his loved ones gifts, he does over think it tho cmon its atsushi

like he’ll see a nice pen, buy it for kunikida, but then he’ll feel like its such a dumb little thing and he should’ve put more effort into a gift because of that he ends up hoarding a lot of trinkets becuz he’ll see them and buy them as presents but be too shy to give them up

(and he’ll also spend ages pouring over what the perfect present for everyone would be but always finding some fault in his ideas)

it’s not until dazai’s breaking into atsushi’s apartment to teach him the joys of stealing other people’s credit cards that he notices a neat stack of containers with atsushi’s friends and stuff’s name on it and asks atsushi about it that something ever happens

dazai: don’t tell me atsushi, you were planning on chopping us all up and storing us into these containers ? u’d need bigger ones for that by the way

atsushi, horrified: WHAT?? of course not!!! these are-

atsushi, flustered: these are just things that i dont know i bought becuz i thought you’d like them. but theyre silly so i didn’t give-

dazai, already opening his own box: ATSUSHI!

atsushi, trying to pull him away: what

dazai, pulling out a tiny void eyed black cat keychain: did you buy this for me? how did you know i wanted it?

atsushi:

atsushi: you wanted it?

dazai, lying but atsushi doesn’t need to know that: yeah i wanted something like this. how cruel atsushi, buying it and storing it away~ not giving it to me :(

atsushi, pleased and happy: do you um want to look at the other stuff ?

//

so essentially dazai in his own strange way of not actually addressing the problem convinces atsushi to give his silly little gifts to the agency members

(and tho he did not want anything like the keychain before, he’s quite pleased by it and all the other things that atsushi got for him)

so atsushi in a moment of joy and happiness places all the containers in front of each members door with his name signed and bolts (kyouka’s is placed near her stuff right before he leaves since he wakes up before her) (things for non-agency members like lucy are left in places where they work/hang out a lot) (fukuzawa’s in front of his office doors)

//

the morning at work, atsushi’s shaking with nervousness 

the first one to arrive after him is kunikida (who’s usually the first to arrive)

kunikida greets atsushi politely - theres something about him that seems different, a little red on his cheeks but atsushi cant tell what; he’s too busy being relieved that kunikida isn’t upset about his gifts

when kunikida opens his book, the pen he pulls out is the one atsushi gifted him and atsushi is immediately filled with warmth and contentment (when he moves his head, atsushi notices that his hair is tied with the ribbon atsushi gave him)

kunikida doesn’t say anything but his gratitude and his appreciation for atsushi’s gifts is clear (also he may or may not ruffle atsushi’s hair more than usual that day)

//

after kunikida and dazai’s appreciation, atsushi is more excited about everyone’s reactions

junichiro is flustered and pleased and thanks him profusely, grinning the entire day - naomi tells him about each gift and why she likes it 

kenji tries to gift him a cow which is banned from the office by kunikida - who points out that atsushi wouldn’t know what to do with it, so kenji comes back with chickens, and then after the same thing happens, gives atsushi stuff from his garden

haruno and the other staff all thank atsushi with hugs or shoulder pats

ranpo doesn’t look at atsushi as he approaches him but he’s wearing the pins atsushi bought him and the fact that he’s holding out a candy for atsushi to take is telling enough

yosano thanks him fiddling with the bracelet atsushi bought

kyouka apologizes for not giving him anything and atsushi has to explain to her that he’s just getting gifts becuz he wants to not becuz he wants them to give hm something back 

fukuzawa does the old person affection thing by placing his hand on atsushi head ya know the thing

anyway

lucy is blushing when he goes down to the cafe and calls him dumb and then gives him extra cake so-

//

the only person who atsushi’s bought gifts for but hasn’t given them to is akutagawa

their relationship isn’t as hostile as before but atsushi doesn’t know what to do with it but he thinks theres a tiny chance that akutagawa might like them so he makes up his mind and ships them to him (he does not include a return address or his name)

akutagawa, climbing through atsushi’s window a few days later: it was you wasn’t it?

atsushi: stop climbing through my window asshole????

akutagawa, coughing and showing atsushi the black bracelet atsushi got him: answer me

atsushi, remembering the gifts, flushing: wh-what ? noooo-  I uh. I mean i don’t know what you’re talking about

akutagawa: it has to be you. no one else would give me something as strange as a plastic skeleton

atsushi, weakly: it fit ur aesthetic ?

akutagawa, ‘glaring’ at him: 

atsushi: ...sorry?

akutagawa, looking away, coughing, ears red: whatever. i don’t like being in debt. tell me what you want, i’ll buy it for u

atsushi: oh no no no. you don’t have to do that! honest. it was just a few silly things that reminded me of... you... r u okay ur face’s red

akutagawa, grabbing atsushi and pulling him towards the window: shut up im buying u dinner

atsushi, very confused: ok?

anyway yeah

might add a part 2 becuz i wasn’t gonna post the start of atsushi giving gifts but just him giving ppl gifts but i cant help myself

also howd akutagawa get here

#shin soukoku #shin soukoku au #sskk #Dazai Osamu #bsd kunikida #bsd yosano #bsd ranpo #bsd kenji #bsd haruno #bsd naomi #bsd junichiro #kunikida headcanons #bsd kyouka #bsd akutagawa #atsushi nakajima #bungou stray dogs atsushi #bsd atsushi #bsd fukuzawa #dazai and atsushi #kunikida fluff #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs akutagawa #sskk headcanons #bsd sskk #akutagawa ryuunosuke #Akutagawa #akutagawa x atsushi #bungou stray dogs dazai #bsd

[cas-skz]

sunshine

Seonghwa x Fem!reader

| non-idol au | romance | smut | 18+!!! | 1/1 |

Hired as a cleaning/care taker for an elderly woman, her grandson keeps you around after her death. A normal relationship soon took an erotic turn.

[writers note]

Did I reread this? No. Will there most likely be grammar & spelling mistakes. Yes. I was in my Seonghwa feels tho & this was the outcome. Hope you enjoy!!

cas xx

“Seonghwa! Please! Please, I’m begging you!” You cried out, hands gripping tightly to the chain he had you tied to.

“Begging for what sunshine?” Seonghwa had a devilish grin on his face as he pushed the vibrator wand deeper into your clit.

You could hear drops of your juices hitting the floor, begging to release more. “Please let me cum! Please!” You cried out as tears started to fall down your cheeks.

“Cum.” He ordered.

Your body relaxes immediately as your let your body roll into your fourth orgasm of the night. You were starting to see stars and couldn’t help but giggle at the electricity tingling through your body.

“You made such a big mess.” Seonghwa drawled as he untied your arms and legs, bruised from the friction of the ropes. He gently kissed up your thighs, over your chubby tummy, breasts, before finally deeply kissing your lips.

“Clean it up.” He ordered.

You caught your breath finally and nodded to him, pushing the chair out of the way as you bent down with a cloth, making sure to expose yourself properly to Seonghwa. “I’m so sorry. I couldn’t help myself.” You whined, looking back at him with puppy eyes.

The relationship you had with Seonghwa wasn’t a typical one, far from it really. His father had hired you to take care of Seonghwa’s grandma and after her passing, he had moved in and kept you employed for house keeping.

It wasn’t long before things took a sexual turn.

“What am I going to do with you?” Seonghwa hissed, spreading his legs open as he sat on a chair. His hand gripped his girthy cock as he watched you clean your own mess, “Sunshine, when you’re done there. I need some attention.”

You quickly finished cleaning up before turning to him and crawling on your knees over to him. It was like a switch flipped when you saw his cock, his bright red tip leaking with pre-cum, the veins that ran along his long mass. You could feel yourself starting to drip again.

“Did you miss me?” You questioned, your voice now taking on a more seductive tone as you ran only finger over his sensitive tip. “You’re more excited than usual.”

Seonghwa placed one finger under your chin and directed your head up to him. “Who’s fault is that?” His hand gripped around your neck as he pulled you up and onto his lap, letting his cock sink deep into your entrance.

You hugged onto him tightly, biting down on his shoulder as your tight walls loosened to fit his girth. Seonghwa’s hands ran slowly up and down your back, “Just relax sunshine, let me take care of you.” He whispered, slowly started to pump his cock.

It had only been a few days since you had fucked, but each time always felt incredible and kept you wanting more.

You moaned in his ear as your hips started to move on their own, “Fuck, Seonghwa.” You leaned back a bit, finding your rhythm as you started to ride him. “Your cock always feel so good in me.”

The connection you felt to Seonghwa had only grown deeper over time but recently it had taken a more romantic turn when you both admitted to having feelings for one another. It was a drunken conversation that you hadn’t gone back too.

Seonghwa lifted you both from the chair, looping his arms under your legs as his hips slammed into yours, pushing you closer to another orgasm. He headed towards the bedroom, keeping his lips tight against yours and bodies connected.

You peaked before reaching the room, sliding off Seonghwa’s cock as your wetness dripped off your body. He slapped your ass a few times, leaving red marks as he hummed happily.

“Do you need a break, sunshine?” He asked, gently laying you on the bed. Seonghwa slowly thrusted his shaft along your clit as he leaned down to gently kiss your neck and face.

“Please fuck me.” You moaned, hips moving in attempt to push his cock back inside. “Please. Please.”

Seonghwa gently slid into your swollen entrance, moaning into your ear as his teeth started to bite at your neck.

You arms wrapped around him, digging into his back as he started to thrust deeply, feeling almost every stroke in your stomach. “Faster.”

He growled deeply as he moved faster, leaning up to lift your legs around his hips. His thumb started to rub circles on your clit as he slammed into you, muffling your moans into whimpers.

“I fucking love you sunshine.”

His words made you cum hard as his cock throbbed deeply inside you, filling your womb with his thick cum.

Your body trembled beneath him as he leaned down to kiss you again, deeply and filled with passion. His brushed his nose against yours before gently falling next to you, “Please stay the night.” He whispered, pulling you into his chest.

You nodded and sunk into him, calming your breathing as your heavy eyes slowly started to close. You listened to his heart, comforted by the warmth.

“Seonghwa?” You asked quietly.

“Yes sunshine?”

You looked up at him, a soft smile taking over your lips. “Why do you call me that?”

Seonghwa breathed you in as he pressed a kiss on your forehead, “Because ever since I met you, you took the darkness away. You walk into a room and it’s like the sun coming out after a rain storm.”

Your heart fluttered with each word, a warmth of comfort took over your body. “I love you.” You whispered.

“I love you too, my sunshine.”

#ateez #ateez smut #ateez fanfic #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #ateez x reader #ateez x female reader #ateez seonghwa #park seonghwa #park seonghwa smut #park seonghwa x reader #seonghwa smut #seonghwa x reader #seonghwa fanfic #seonghwa x y/n #seonghwa

[zeynatura]

Ranting about Nucani

There is something I want to express and this fandom should know.

Nu: Carnival is a Harem game but unlike most games in the genre the relationships with MC are all canon within the same story, there are no "Routes", no "Alternate Universe/Timelines", it's all 1 Main Story where you get to gradually meet all the Characters who'll be your companions, in this game named Clan members, and all of them one way or another end up falling for Eiden (MC), which makes polyam relationship canon with Eiden as the center:

Like very few games have polyam representation, let alone a positive one, like yes the polycule it's very Eiden central but even then all the Clan Members interact with one another, as we see mainly in the time limited Events but also in the Main Story, and have friendly and amicable interactions, they rely on one another sometimes even without Eiden being involved.

But also, Aster and Morvay have a relationship established too since way before the events of the prologue of the game, Kuya and Quincy have hinted some sort of situationship (idk I don't care about Quincy and my knowledge about Kuya is limited to what happens in the story and events cause I have no limited SSRs nor have I read any of his Intimacy Rooms).

[Also if any of you knows of any other relationship that have been hinted at that i'm missing feel free to share, i specifically ask of you to refer to only canon, i know in fanon anything and everything is possible and sometimes we may be missperceiving some interactions between characters so i ask of you to take those rose tinted glasses off and see unfiltered canon, it's hard for me too ngl so dw]

All this started with some posts I saw about ppl feeling bad for Yakumo and/or Edmond to be "forced into a polyam relationship" when they are the "most romantic members" and "deserve a monogamous relationship", their words not mine, as if mono > poly , but also do you really think they're against it!?

One thing is being Clan Members against their will (which is all Huey's fault btw), having to work together to regulate the Altars' Essence (or their own) and then another one completely is involving themselves in a personal and intimate way with Eiden, which the latter they all did in their own terms and out of free will.

Also i wanna share one of the best and my fav scenes with Karu, which i know not everyone was able to experience it cause it's hidden in the Intimacy Rooms of a Limited SSR, but it expresses exactly why the polycule is consensual.

Context: Eiden has been worrying about forcing the Clan Members to be with him because he is the New Grand Sorcerer, against their will just because of Huey's magic that ties them together and the responsibility of Regulating the Altars and basically maintaining stability in the Klein Continent.

His worries began (at least that i noticed) in "Eerie Escapade" (Halloween Event), that was also the first time Garu got hurt while protecting Eiden and the first time Karu got mad at him and fronted to yell at Eiden (which is my another fav scene of Karu omg i love him so much i gotta go back and take screenshots of that but that's for another post), the second one being in "Army x Blood x Oath" (which are the screenshots i'll show u)

Because this are the Intimacy Rooms of Garu/Karu's Limited SSR this scene focuses on Eiden feeling guilty because Garu got hurt in the past (Halloween Event) and this time he lost his memory (temporarily, due to this event's story) and Eiden blaming himself for it all and wondering if they would be better off without him, but the same can and is applied to the rest of the Clan Members, seeing how Eiden met and approached Rei while respecting his privacy and independency even tho he's also a Clan Member and the newest introduced in the story, means that the Limited Events are also canon and part of the story because Eiden seems to be growing and learning from previous Events and showing that development in future Events and the Main Story.

Karu also mentions that Garu (prior to losing his memories) was also worrying about the same thing Eiden was, like 'what if Master (Eiden) stays with us just because of the contract with Huey? :c' and he calls them both idiots because they don't communicate and fronts to fix it! (Mighty Karu to the rescue)

And talking about "Eerie Escapade" that is also the event where Yakumo's possessiveness towards Eiden shows, i'll admit i haven't seen the last room but i feel like those people i mentioned before are using it as fuel to their idea, because if Yakumo is jealous of other Clan Members interacting with Eiden and "Wants him all to himself" that must mean he wants a monogamous relationship, right?

WRONG!

That just means Yakumo is a complex person that feels different emotions specially when it comes to the most important person in his life (Eiden) other than his grandparents!

And Yakumo feels guilty for having those feelings, not because of them being in a polycule and he not wanting to be in it, but because he has trauma and sees his desires and wants as selfishness and he would never allow himself to be selfish cause he doesn't want to hurt people, he's a people's pleaser! He lives with constant fear of hurting others like the Great Serpent did when it killed many (but apparently there may be more that meets the eye, because the current event hinted that the Great Serpent actually liked humans and took care of children ???)

And Yakumo dealing with those feelings along with his yokai powers as a descendant of The Great Serpent have been the main topic of his last 3 Limited SSRs, which is great because that means CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT~

Now unfortunately i cannot talk about Edmond's Intimacy Rooms as i'm missing ALL OF HIS SSRs (why do you hate me Edmond if ily) but from what i've seen he's also pretty happy being with Eiden, heck even HIS MOM is happy his son is with Eiden!

That's right, she's the first and only parent of the Clan Members that knows and approves of their relationship, if it weren't because most of them are orphan we could get many more... i wonder if Yakumo's grandparents are aware hmmm ... and we all know Olivine's parents are gonna HATE it xD and maybe Garu's wolf pack will approve of Eiden by the end of this event.

#i just realized i may not be the right person to talk about polyam relationships and representation #even if i'm open to polyamory while in a monogamous relationship currently #and i do my best to do my research about it and learn from polyam people #but then again i used to do the same with queer people before finding out i was queer #and neurodiverse people before realizing i am one too #and the most recent was autism :D #so maybe i'm not the wrong person to talk about it #also if any of you treat Garu and Karu as the same person when they're a system i will lose it #or worse when people don't acknowledge Karu #help me i love these pups with my life and i will protect them #aster and morvay relationship's nature is not for us to decide #but the fact is that they have one #nu carnival #nucani #canon polyamory #if you read all this i love you~ #edit: i thought Morvay having multiple sex partner was obvious 🤔 #but some ppl pointed it out so #yeah #the incubus has sex with many ppl besides Eiden and Aster all consensual #while Aster finds it annoying but also helpful Eiden think it's hot #big edit: nvm I AM THE RIGHT PERSON to talk about this as im ambiamorous #which means im happy both in a monoam and polyam relationships #so i am in the polyam spectrum and would love to have what these boys have

[undiscovered-horizon]

Bestie we need a part two 💳💥💥💳💥💥💳💳💥💥💳💳💳 ASAP u can’t leave this beautifully made fanfic without a  sequel, this made me kick my feet in the air and giggle like schoolgirl 😀 lolll I’m down bad for Eddie/riddler

yo call me FedEx because I deliver (not sure this the package you wanted tho)

Imagine the Riddler being your secret admirer. - Part 2

[Part 1] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5]

What you thought was a single, queer occasion, became something regular. The notes and cards would appear every other day and soon you found yourself expecting them with excitement. You had your own little, deliciously sweet secret. Realizing how the situation might look to others, you didn't dare tell anyone else about the strangeness you've been a part of - they wouldn't understand. People were quick to jump to conclusions, to assume the worst of others even if there was no malice. Just like there was none in the bizarre friendship or relationship, you had with someone whose identity you couldn't even begin to guess.

The question of the secret admirer's identity was something that wouldn't let you sleep. Some occurrences were too tailored to you and your mundane life for the enigmatic person to be someone completely estranged. Like that one day when the whole world seemed to be against you and nothing would go the way you wanted, you found a cinnamon bun with a birthday candle at your doorstep. So whoever they were, they simply cared.

Was there a piece of you that remained wary? Yes, of course, there was - if your life did not transform into a chick flick, it sure became a good buildup to a horror movie. That part of you, however, was silent most of the time. After all, what kind of malice, if any, could reside in a heart of someone who showered you with small gifts and words of affection?

That day, you were greeted with a bouquet of pink and red flowers strung together with raffia. A small tag was tied to the decoration:

What flowers are kissable?

You looked closer at the flowers in the bouquet - they were all of one kind...

"Tulips?" you slowly said to yourself. You couldn't help but laugh. "God, you're so corny."

Shaking your head with amusement, you entered your apartment and went straight to your bedside table to change one mysterious bouquet for another. The previous flowers barely even began to wilt.

"Wish you had a name," you said as your hand caressed the tag attached to the flowers.

Having let out a heavy sigh, you decided to change into something more comfortable. You let your thoughts wander, conjuring up various possibilities about the secret admirer, as you took off your top and pants - completely oblivious to the lovesick voyeur following each of your steps.

He felt a little ashamed for not immediately looking away. But, in the end, it wasn't his fault, was it? How could he ever be blamed for succumbing to your luring beauty? Could sailors truly be responsible for following the siren's song?

Although his eyes were still fixed on you, his mind was already fantasizing about the next gift he should make for you but most importantly - the little wish you had made that he couldn't help but grant. Truthfully, Ed couldn't deny you anything; he was but a humble servant to your ethereal glory.

The next day, when you were about to leave the comfort of your home and face the responsibilities of the real world, you found another envelope laying on the doormat outside your front door. Inside, there was another cheesy card to add to your abundant collection. This one, however, did not have a riddle written on it but a torn-out page from what looked like a vintage collection of poems:

My lady hath of charms her lion’s share; Grace, beauty, wit and a sweet thoughtfulness, Which rests serenely on her gentle face, Sweet as the flowers are, and pure as air.

Below the ripped-out page was a small scribble that made you audibly gasp, although softly: '- Ed'.

"So you do have a name... Eddie." You smiled to yourself feeling how easily the name rolled off your tongue.

His heart stopped for a moment. The world grew silent and the only thing that mattered, truly mattered, was the soft affection with which you spoke his name.

#the batman 2022 #batman 2022 #batman fanficiton #riddler x reader #riddler x you #batman imagine #batman fanfic #edward nashton x reader #edward nashton x you #edward nashton imagine #edward nashton fanfiction #edward nashton #the riddler imagine #the riddler x reader #the riddler x you #the riddler #the riddler fanfiction #the riddler x y/n #riddler fanfiction #riddler imagine #edward nashton fanfic #the riddler fanfic #riddler fanfic #dano!riddler imagine #dano!riddler fanfiction #dano!riddler x you #dano!riddler x reader #dano!riddler #dano riddler #dano!riddler fanfic

[masezace]

little off topic for my blog, but i started watching a new show since a friend mentioned it was good and i'd heard positive things about it, so i just wanted to talk about it a little bit (probably never again after this since this isn't a fandom blog, but it's the only one i have rn so idc it's going here)

the show is Jurassic World Camp Cretaceous, and just going on looks alone, despite my love for dinosaurs and the Jurassic Park franchise i never would have considered it. it appears to be very much for kids, and as i'm in my late twenties now i'm not particularly interested in especially kiddy media. however a friend my age enjoyed it and mentioned it has a canon lgbtq+ couple in it among the main characters, so of course i just had to watch it. i had already been hearing that despite its initial appearance and premise, it was surprisingly good for a kids' show, so i had already been curious, but i was even more keen after knowing there were queer characters, and not even the adults, the kids themselves (in a kid's show?!! what a time to be alive), so i finally sat down and watched it.

[spoiler warning, both minor and major, for the rest of this post btw, so continue reading at your own risk if you haven't seen it yet/are still watching]

the show overall

okay so firstly, i am coming at all of this from the perspective of a writer, so my observations are from a technical standpoint more so than just as a fan of the show. and honestly, it really is a well-written show as a whole. is it geared towards kids? definitely. there are plenty of jokes/gags in it that just don't appeal to me as an adult, but beyond that, there was plenty to appreciate as an adult.

the writing is actually phenomenal? there were several points in the series where i just sat back and mulled over the way a scene went, what the thought process behind writing it was like, how well it was executed, and how important it was to the characters and overall plot.

the suspense is spot on, nothing gets dragged out too long, and i will admit there have been a few scenes throughout that actually got me; i jumped! it's actually scarier than i expected a kid show to be, but i'm so glad they went where they did because it really elevated the experience.

the pacing overall is very good, adequately engaging for kids' short attention spans (and us adhd adults 🥲) but not too short either to a point where things felt abrupt or unfinished. plot arcs are well developed and tied up nicely. also, as a bit of a dinosaur nerd, the array of dinosaurs in the show is super broad and satisfying! very fun stuff.

character element

imo the real gem of this show is the character development. honestly it's just *chefs kiss*

the characters grow and change so much and so realistically over the course of the show, it's honestly so much better and more satisfying than the character growth in most adult fiction/media recently.

the growth in ben (who btw was def my favorite character by the end of s1) and kenji in particular were my favorites and, in my personal opinion, the most interesting. the way ben started out anxious, cowardly, and rule abiding to a fault, then grew into a brave, confident, adventurous little pyromaniac gremlin, then had that stint later in the series where he regressed a bit-questioning himself-until eventually ultimately striking a great balance and really coming into himself was just... peak character writing.

kenji started out overconfident, lazy, and overly concerned with money/status. but that arrogant overconfidence and laziness slowly turned into responsibility, and a desire to protect his found family, and the realization that it's the people in your life that really matter most.

honestly what i mentioned only scratches the surface in terms of those two characters, there's certainly more that can be said about them (as well as all the others) but i'm not really in the mood for a deep dive character analysis atm. just trust me tho when i say these characters are so well done and each one of them have arcs that are super satisfying to watch play out.

queer representation

and as for the queer couple? yasmina and sammy are PERFECT. it was so beautiful watching their relationship grow from one-sided to mutual friendship, to loyal devotion, then to love. they were set up incredibly well and incredibly naturally. i have like, no complaints when it comes to them. i don't even know if there's anything i can say that would add to things, they were just a really awesome couple to watch become canon, they're the beautiful and painfully needed representation we all beg for in tv and movies.

shipping, chemistry, and intent

but oh goodness... probably my only real complaint about the entire show would be how benji (ben x kenji) and kenji x brooklyn (kenlyn? brookji? idk and idrc) were handled. because for all that this show did SO much beautifully right, they really screwed the pooch here, sadly.

i'm gonna start by saying that the writing in this show, as with most, is deliberate. what i mean by this is that despite having no clue who it would be because my friend thankfully did not even spoil me as far as the genders of the queer couple, i clocked yas and sammy as the would-be queer couple as early as season one (actually it was between them and benji, but more on that later). i could already see the chemistry, because it was deliberately written in.

shipping is subjective. anyone can ship any character, and in most cases it's pretty easy to see how there could be (romantic) chemistry between fan pairings based on their personalities, their arcs, etc. and that's okay! ships don't even have to have any canon support to be valid, because shipping is for the fandom, and it's for fun (i have a few rarepairs and crack ships across different media that i just love).

but onscreen/written romantic chemistry is a lot less subjective (to clarify, it is subjective whether or not the chemistry is good, but it's not subjective about whether or not it exists). there are literally scenes written with the sole purpose of building the romantic tension and/or chemistry between planned couples (some of which even have absolutely zero plot relevance, which usually is not advised tbh, and most of which are the cliches/tropes you see in literally any romance ever written, some are just disguised a little better than others. but make no mistake, it's all the same set of cliches. there is nothing new under the sun), as well as intentional, key moments within scenes that have other purposes. they are essential to establish romantic pairings.

and typically, the foundations for these couples are laid VERY early on. always within the first or second season (well, at least they are when the writer actually knows what they're doing and has at least a rough plan/outline for the entire series & characters. this is usually a large part of what separates the good chemistry from the poor chemistry. an author who knows who the couples are going to be and has a plan from the beginning to build them up is going to be more successful in creating a believable relationship with good chemistry. one who does not plan, or makes last minute plans will almost certainly fail, and the couple is just going to suck). when the set of characters you're working with are going to stay the same for most or all of the story, you start immediately.

i don't mean to toot my own horn, because i think it's because i'm a writer so i just pick up on narrative patterns very easily, and pretty much always clock the planned couples within the first few episodes of any series, and by the end i am right like 9 times out of 10.

that being said, do you know whose deliberately written chemistry i also clocked in jwcc? ben and kenji's.

kenji and... brooklyn?

no offense to people who like/enjoy kenji and brooklyn, you are free to love them, but the way their romance was written is... quite possibly the weakest point of the show. it felt like they were just trying to appease the upsetto heteros in charge, because there was definitely another het pairing that had a lot more potential than kenji and brooklyn (hello darius x brooklyn aka darilyn, you would have actually made sense because your relationship had amazing buildup and multiple standout scenes from s1 on. dgmw, i love that we got a m/f strong, supportive, purely platonic friendship out of them, i live for those and we really need more of them. but we could have had that with kenji and brooklyn, or darius and sammy, or ben and yas, literally any other pair instead).

kenji and brooklyn as a couple came out of absolutely nowhere. i honestly think they decided to shove them together last minute, and had no actual plan for them until they were working on s4. because their development barely started at the VERY end of s3 (the abruptness of him caring about her being held hostage so much more than literally anyone else in their group despite them having like zero buildup to that point gave me whiplash), but honestly didn't really even become "meaningful" development until s4, over halfway through the series. the two spend the first 3 seasons basically not particularly gaf about each other individually, only as part of the whole group and on an equal level with everyone else. they otherwise have no deliberate narrative foundation. it just starts in s4 with no prior hinting. which makes their development rocky and difficult to believe. the funny thing is their characters literally have dialogue (in s4) trying to draw comparisons/parallels between them to say that they especially have a lot in common and like??? no? they really don't? not any more so than any other two kids in the group. their relationship just, really falls flat.

it was disappointing to see it take such a massive spotlight in the series for almost all of seasons 4 and 5, overshadowing the friendships that have been the focus of the show and should have remained so, to the point where at times it just felt like i was watching some stereotypical het highschool romance. genuinely, it made s4 & 5 more of a drag to get through. yasammy and ben and yas' growing bond (which by the way was so sweet, it had the strongest queer solidarity vibes good lord, i sure wonder why yas chose ben out of everyone to come out to first, hmmm) were some of the few things that kept me invested, otherwise i would have dropped it if it had leaned much farther into becoming the kenlyn show than it already was. especially when it was that pair so much of the focus was given to, even though we had so readily and perfectly available, the pair that could have, should have been: benji. which finally brings me to:

ben and kenji

benji's foundation was laid in s1. their interactions, the situations they found themselves in, were deliberate (on the writers' part). i'm even gonna go out on a limb here and say the pairings were fully established in s1e3, even with parallels between yasammy and benji (sammy clinging to yas and ben clinging to kenji throughout the episode), and darilyn gets the beginning of their development too.

even though they bicker a lot in the beginning, they clearly care about each other? kenji protects/helps ben multiple times, and there are definitely some looks ben gives kenji at times. at the end of s1, the one who seems the most deeply effected over ben's "death," other than darius (understandably since he's the one who failed to save him), was kenji! immediately after it happens, we get two close up shots, darius and brooklyn then yasmina and sammy. after which, we go back to the whole group with kenji in center frame, the focus is intentionally on him. it is only kenji who drops to his knees at the loss, and then we get a close up of just kenji. he was saved for last, and he was alone in frame (tbf bumpy was in frame too, but i'm talking humans here), which implies his feelings are especially important in this moment. that is the reason for solo close ups.

after ben's "death," kenji takes to always wearing ben's fanny pack, and up until bumpy--who ben cares VERY much about--got separated from them, kenji was the one who (however briefly) took over her care, ensuring she got off the monorail with them, and he's extremely distraught, more than pretty much all of them, when they can't find her, and he's last to leave when they decide to accept that ben's gone. even when they do leave, he's distant and distracted and his mind is clearly still on ben.

other than darius, kenji is the only one (if i'm remembering correctly) to mention ben/say his name after they lost him, upset because he was actually trying not to think about him. he has clearly thought about ben, probably a lot, because it's hard not to be reminded constantly when you wear something that belonged to a deceased loved one. and frankly, he appears to be the only one who dwells on him that much.

when ben reappears alive (which btw he found the group again because of kenji's butter knife, hello), the frames literally purposely focus on kenji's reaction. he's the one in the foreground every time they show him and brooklyn in that scene. he is the first one to say ben's name, the first one to go to him and hug him, and the scene takes special care to highlight kenji's strong emotions at ben's reappearance, lingering on his teary face as the focus for a bit even after brooklyn enters the frame to hug ben (because she is not at all an important element in the scene at that moment). just like when ben "died," the way this scene is written and shot HEAVILY suggests that ben holds significant importance to kenji, specifically. because again, the focus here is on kenji and ben almost exclusively, with brooklyn as only an afterthought lol. and quite frankly literally everyone else's reaction to him being alive was pretty lackluster compared to the special attention they gave to kenji on this.

and then in s3 we have the infamous hat scene, where darius and ben are in the limo and ben sees and mentions kenji's sailor hat, looking sad and sounding like... longing?? then directly after we switch to kenji realizing he forgot his hat?? the scene has no real significance tbh other than to draw a connection between ben and kenji. like, it acts as a transition to switch to the pov of the group on the boat, but it was entirely unnecessary? why not just have darius say something about the others and then show them on the boat? if there were no special relationship between ben and kenji, it would have made far more sense if they really wanted it to be ben to say something, that he sees the hat, and sadly says something along the lines of "i hope the others are okay/doing better than we are right now/etc" which implies that the hat made him think of everyone, their whole group. rather than what we got... which very much implies that he was mostly just thinking about kenji 💀 and then kenji thinking about the hat at the same time ben's looking at it and thinking of kenji. like, this is.... a very blatant connection being made by the writing/directing here.

all of that. so many deliberate connections made between ben and kenji, they had a very solid foundation laid for a romance to develop, and by all intents and purposes one already WAS developing according to the show's own subtext. which was why up until s4 obliterated the idea, i was positive the queer couple in the show was either going to be yasammy or benji. it was extremely obvious imo. but as soon we started getting the typical, loud, cliche "we are going to pair off these characters" scenes for kenji and brooklyn, i knew we were getting yasammy and not benji (to be clear, i'm not at all upset about yasammy, they're beautiful and i love how their relationship was done, i wouldn't have had it end any other way for them. but i do personally prefer benji, i just like their personalities and dynamic more. and i feel they had so much potential that got wasted to make way for a far less interesting pairing between kenji and brooklyn. why can't we have 2 queer couples, huh? and if we really needed a minimum of one hetero pairing to appease whoever needed appeasing, darilyn was right there).

but then??? their like entire bond just gets dropped (honestly ben himself gets pretty heavily sidelined for almost all of the last two seasons, which is criminal imo). mostly so that a rushed kenji x brooklyn can be established. like there are still a few small moments here and there in early s4, and one episode in s5 (ep 10), but from early s4 till pretty much the end of the series we hardly see them have any meaningful conversations or interactions, meanwhile literally every other combo in the group does.

it's so weird? why build up benji so deliberately over the course of multiple seasons just to like, fully discard it for a pairing with far less chemistry, even after the chemistry-building scenes they shared, some of which literally had no other purpose than to affirm their connection? even though they were very sparse, the moments benji had were just so blatant (kenji leaps into the rock crevice right onto the back of a saber tooth to save ben?!!?? like he literally was just willing to exchange his life for him like that?? he basically says that he wasn't really thinking, he just did it. so he moved out of what, emotional instinct, that's what we're meant to intuit from that series of events? implying that he specifically has strong emotion and doesn't think things through when it comes to ben? because he doesn't do that kinda stuff for any of the others in the group! even better, this parallels when sammy jumped on the nothosaurus to save yasmina. and then the way benji look at each other after it's over??? hello??? and then how kenji pulls both brooklyn and ben in for that hug a couple minutes later... side eyeing the writers for that choice. they knew what they were doing there and they were evil for it). i just can't see any reason to have dropped them like they were, after all the development they shared for 3 seasons. confounding. biggest disappointment of the series.

i know this probably reads to some as just "wahh, my ship didn't become canon" nonsense. but that's not why i'm bugged. this wasn't just a ship i liked and wanted canon despite no actual narrative support, as most ships tend to be. this ship did have narrative support. there was intent behind many of their scenes together, lingering looks and little things that matter narratively and are always used to signify a stronger/special connection. and it led nowhere, for no good reason. that bothers me. writing that implies and promises something, but never delivers on it. like a person who never finishes their sentences (think Dr McPhee from Night at the Museum). ultimately it's not a HUGE deal or anything, at the end of the day it's just a ship and just a kids' show. but as a writer, it's just irritating to see something like that be done. what can i say 🤷

conclusion

even despite the wasted potential between certain pairings, and even though i do think the first three seasons were superior to the last two, overall i really enjoyed the show, and for what it was, it was really well-made. the overarching focus was of course on found family and friendship before anything else, which i absolutely love, and it was masterfully done. out of 6 kids, all of them had at least one or two meaningful bonding moments one-on-one with another in the group, so every possible combination had their moment to build strong, believable friendships with each other. i'm just so surprised by how good it was as a whole honestly, good enough to binge over the course of a week. i will happily recommend jwcc to anyone willing to give it a watch regardless of age, because i definitely think there's no age limit for a good story, no matter the medium it's told in. :)

#jwcc #jurassic world camp cretaceous #benji jwcc #benji #yasammy #yasammy jwcc #i would say that there's prob an age minimum tho... it's a bit scary so depending on the kid i wouldn't rec it to under 10 years #this is a long post #omg so long i'm sorry #i just have a lot to say #gotta shout into the void #it just be like that sometimes #fair warning this post is literally just me praising the show in the first half n then going absolutely off about benji in the second half #review #tv show review #as always with stuff like this that has any mention of ships it is bound to ruffle some feathers #so let me postface this with the reminder that this is all just MY OPINION #you are free to disagree but i'd rather you don't share your disagreements on my post via reblog/notes #feel free to write up your own show/ship review if you feel so strongly #otherwise if you dislike anything i've said you can just scroll past or block me <3

[icamefromthepinterestscreenshots]

CW: child whumper (sidekick), mentions of previous abuse. (If you find any more CWs I’ve missed, please tell me!)

Villain was feeling great. Todays plan had gone perfectly and now hero’s own sidekick was tied to a chair in front of them. Poor sidekick probably had no idea where they were, Villain smirked.

‘I bet your praying hero is going to show up and save you. I assure you they won’t. They don’t even know where my lair is; besides, do you really think they’ll go through all the effort just to save their stupid little sidekick who got themselves kidnapped?’

Sidekick was shaking. Terrified. Now completely at the villains mercy, their identity was going to be revealed, they just knew it. And then it wouldn’t just be sidekick that will die, but their loved ones too. Hero has told sidekick about villain. Sidekick knew villain was a ruthless killer. Their fear mixed with their guilt for having endangering not only themselves but their friends too. Hero would be so disappointed in sidekick. Villain was right, hero would never bother to save them. It was their own fault that they had messed up and gotten themselves kidnapped.

Villain crouched down and reached out to sidekicks face-

‘Let’s see who’s under this disguise- which I must say, is rather pathetic. Could you not have come up with a better costume for yourself?’, villain joked.

-Sidekick flinched away, but villain swiftly grabbed sidekicks mask and roughly pulled it off their face.

‘I bet you’re-‘,

The villains grin dropped along with their stomach. This was not what they were expecting. Rage shook through villain. Sidekicks face showed nothing but absolute fear.

‘A child. You’re just a child’

Villains face softened as they tried to hide their anger from the kid that sat before them. Hero had sent a child to fight them. A child. How could hero do this? And who was responsible for sidekicks black eye? Villain knew it wasn’t them. Was it hero? When villain got their hands on them-

But that could be dealt with later. Villain needed to focus on the terrified face in front of them.

‘I’m not a child. I’m 15’

‘Who told you that was old? Was it hero? You can’t even drink yet, darling. You’re a child.

And to be clear, I am not going to hurt you. I know hero’s probably told you horrible lies about me, but I can assure you, they’re not true… at least most of them aren’t true. But I would never intentionally hurt a child’

Sidekick was shocked by the softness of villains voice, which was completely different from the roughness it had been filled with 2 seconds ago. It was just an act. It had to be. Sure, hero could be harsh to sidekick, but sidekick deserved it right? Hero was just training sidekick.

‘Are you hungry? Injured? Let me patch you up’

Villain gently brushed sidekicks hair out their face to get a better look at the purple bruises forming on their forehead. Sidekick flinched away from the hand, letting out a small whimper.

That was it. Villain vowed they would destroy hero next time they saw them. But first, they have got to help the poor kid.

————————————————————————————————

This was my first time writing something like this, so any feedback and help would be appreciated. In fact, it think this is the first time I’ve written a story outside an English lesson (which I haven’t done as a subject since GCSE’s) since I wrote a short Harry Potter headcanon when I was 12 lol. I still remember that headcanon tho, and I’m pretty sure it might still be on tumblr somewhere 🫡

#child sidekick #villain and child hero #villain and child sidekick #evil hero #whump writing #I am terrible at grammar feel free to point out any mistakes I made (also I sincerely apologise lol) #whump #villain x sidekick #hero x villain #caretaker #caretaker villain #idk what else to tag #idk what im doing #in case anyone was wondering the headcanon was about teddy tonks sneaking into headmistress mcginagalks office to look at memories #of his parents in the pensieve

[tallsc]

AvM Ep 33 Commentary

Gonna do a little bit of commentary and whatever important points I notice while watching through the episode, all below the cut so AVM EP 33 SPOILERS BELOW.

I actually love getting to see what more blocks do, not just the command block + lucky block cause a lot of these seem to have different effects and that's awesome. The chaos of this episode is absolutely gonna be Red's fault isn't it though, I see you sneaking off there.

Guys. Guys Yellow canonically sleeps. At some point they have managed to sleep. This is a miracle.

Red just flung the command block away to some random place is this gonna be important later? Also the creeper bee keeps showing up so that feels also important probably

Red just broke a universe oh n o and kidnapped the sentient-looking lucky orb thing

Wait they changed the layout of their house??? Why does Red sleep in the same room as Green???? Does Blue not sleep on the floor anymore??????? NOOO BLUE DOESN'T SLEEP ON THE FLOOR NOOOOOO

Also 1 I love how the orb block creature is animated and 2 they look kinda scared from my perspective, which makes sense if so cause they just got dragged to a new universe and there's this stick thing (which looks a lot like the kind of creature that kidnapped them last time) trying to get them again.

Orange is fighting much more defensively than usual, first three moves I see from them is to block an attack on Green, catch Red (justice for Arcade Games) and take out another shield.

Everyone's gotten very good at this though, I love seeing them employ their skills cause they've all gotten a lot stronger as time goes on. Blue with the potion, Yellow with even just the normal command block, ect

Oh no they've all been eaten IS THE BEE OKAY THO WAIT NO THE BEE'S BEEN TAKEN NOOO the bee's kinda okay though

Oh and you've taught the shiny chaos orb who doesn't seem to like you guys at all how to make block staffs that surely can only go well, I love the effect on the lucky block environment though it's so cool.

Red. Red did you learn that from Green. Using a pick to break lines of blocks coming at you so you can get closer to an enemy. Green used that on you Red. That feels very familiar.

Green that doesn't seem the most useful block to GREEN YOU JUST KILLED PEOPLE WITH MUSIC. THAT'S TERRIFYING. CAN YOU JUST SING SOMEONE TO DEATH???? LIKE WOULD THAT WORK UNDER YOUR OWN POWER IF YOU WERE GOOD ENOUGH AT IT??????

Blue the most acrobatic just pogo-ing their way to victory, also the slightly 3d shot of Red's sword in a standstill is interesting.

Please creeper bee don't explode by the end of this you're so sweet you make the ghast happy you make Red happy you make me happy you make everyone happy oh there you go into the hive

Red silly also Red's got two now, hoping they don't get to bring these home cause these seem overpowered if everyone's got them all the time

HA RED AIN'T POSSESSED BY HEROBRINE THIS TIME HEROBRINE'S CONTROLLED BY RED

Idk I'm probably gonna have to watch this fight a couple times I'm just enjoying the show rn, a lot of different fighting styles coming into play, a lot of interesting stuff you can put in the staff, a boat fighting people, tis fun.

How nice they put all the blocks back and surely the shiny chaos orb won't do anything wrong and is definitely not going to kill everyone with their newfound power

Just love the fighting styles used in this, Yellow and Red teaming up, Red helping Orange out, Green thinking with portals and grappling hook adjacent, Blue doing acrobatic flying, Red and Orange are embracing the powers of Herobrine and the Warden respectively, it's all great

Bedrock cages are kinda rude though smh SOMEONE GET THE BEE THE BEE SHALL SAVE US ALLLLLL MAYBE THE CHAOS ORB LIKES THE CHAOS HYBRID BEE

Wait they actually did get the bee I wrote that before Red did anything NOOOO THE BEE NOOOOOOOO THE BEE'S NOBLE SACRIFICE o7 you were my new favorite character gone but not forgotten

Yellow just looked so annoyed while waiting for their bedrock to break

THEY MADE A MEMORIAL TOO THANK YOU o7 bee I must draw fanart of them soon

On one hand f a i r but on the other you never got after Blue or Yellow that much for causing trouble, give Red a break they did save you all at least

Anyway ye there's my thoughts on the initial episode and most things I noticed off the bat, now time to see what other people think

#alan becker #animation vs minecraft #reaction #avm ep 33 spoilers

[minzis]

Prosecute My Sins

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽ஓ���A Vampire Gaz One-Shot๑ஓ☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

✦❘༻Summary: You were sure you had been KIA while out on a mission with Gaz but you awoke different, changed. Any and all wounds mysteriously healed despite having what should’ve been a fatal wounds. Drenched in the stench of blood paired with an unquenchable thirst for it.

“I’m not what you need, just what you want.”

✦❘༻Tags: Will be mentions of blood, various different forms of torture, major/minor injuries, bits of angst, slight nsfw, nicknames Bunny/Love, 3.2k words.

✦❘༻A/N: This one is quite the doozy thought of this on a late night after binge watching Twilight of course. Tho the vamp lore is different compared to Twilight’s lore. I don’t see many Gaz fics in my opinion and I’m going absolutely feral for Vamp!Gaz. Some inspo taken from ‘I Wanna Be Yours’ happy Halloween as well :3

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽ஓ๑♡๑ஓ☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

The last thing you could remember before it all went dark was the pain. That burning pain in your stomach as you screamed. It was earth shatteringly painful, “I don’t wanna die here, please don’t let me die here.” You were begging as Gaz could only watch in horror. You weren’t going to make it, “no..no sweetheart you’re gonna be alright come on just keep your eyes open and on me yeah?” His bloodied hands cupped your face as it left red smudges across it. The smell of it filling your nose while it poured out of you.

“Oh my god I’m going too fucking die,” you cried out instinctively pressing your hands at the source of the pain hoping it would save whatever life force you had left. “I don’t wanna die here,” ear piercing scream was all that he could hear as his hands raked through your hair. “I know baby just stay with me you’re gonna be okay,” he muttered as time slipped away faster then he could control. There wasn’t enough time, back up wasn’t going too make it.

Your hand moved to hold his as you tried to cling onto the few breaths, “I-I’m sorry.” He shook his head at you resting his forehead against your own, “no baby it’s not your fault you did what you thought was right.” The decision you made begging for them to kill you instead when the men threatened to shoot Gaz. You guys both made the risk of surrendering for an interrogation for the sake of the mission.

“Don’t you fucking touch her!” You could hear Gaz yelling out but it sounded muffled. Ears ringing as you sat bloodied and bruised. Sure they needed to do this integration but you could tell they were enjoying it, getting off on it. Lips sore and gashed from the amount of times you bit down attempting to hush your own screams.

Time is funny like that, moving slower in all the worst times. This was one of them as they broke fingers, pulled teeth, cut at your skin like a pig being butchered. Gaz sat untouched just to get a further kick out of it. “We’ve given you everything we fucking know?!?” He spewed out a range of curses and threats the angered expression on his face yet sat on the verge of tears. “Just let her go,” he was pleading in desperation flipping between anger and fear. The information you provided was seemingly useless and the integrators had grown tired. 

You didn’t have a vest on, neither of you did. They stripped you both of all your belongings meaning before the team even realized something was wrong you’ll be long dead.

Almost like a cruel joke they didn’t shoot you in the head, he had to suffer too. Time slowing to a stop as they aimed at your stomach with a wicked smiles across their faces. You were frozen you didn’t think that far of head. Gaz’s screams over came your ears as realization sunk in. Dying? You were going to die here and you didn’t want too.

The metallic taste began to flood over your tongue coughing up heaps of your own blood. It was in mere seconds before Gaz was in-front of you. Wasn’t he tied to the chair? Your eyes darted around as you tried to search for the men. Only to find them motionless on the ground.

“Come on eyes on me love,” he demanded fearfully as he pulled you closer to him. You could hardly mange to continue holding his hand as the darkness faded in and out. “You know I love you right,” you whispered weakly as he shook his head. “You can tell me that when we get back home,” he hushed your cries before speaking once more.

“I’m sorry, you can hate me later,” before you could even find the strength to respond it all went dark.

It was cold at first in that darkness for what felt like an eternity. So dark you couldn’t even tell if you were blinking or if your eyes were shut. Then the burning came once more but it was worse than before. You wanted to claw at your skin feeling like it had been sat on fire. It was unbearable, your mouth inhumanly hung open to what you had assumed was too scream. You couldn’t even tell if you were screaming as your ears sunk in deafness.

The burning sensation overrunning every single one of your sense at once. As if your veins were being pulled out one by one and sewn back in. You writhed in an inscrutable pain unable to do anything other then hope it was going to end soon.

It was excruciating slow, as if time waited for you just for a cruel joke. You wanted to cry but no more tears would fall. Throat running dry long before your screams would stop, if you even were to begin with. You were petrified stuck in a stillness you couldn’t control. No longer able to move out of your own free will.

Air came and let out your lungs in a fashion that hardly seemed normal. It hurt to breath, to scream, to think, it all hurt. Your heart feeling like just a beat away from stopping entirely. You almost wished it had, death would be merciful compare to any more of this.

A brightness over took your vision beams of light warming your skin. Your eyes fluttered open as you were staring up at the sky. Panic immediately ensued as you sat up in fear as the memories came rushing back. You stared down at your arms flipping them around in confusion, the wounds? The cuts, bruises they were all gone. You should be dead, you felt yourself die? You felt like you but it was so off putting, something was wrong. Like the way your heart beat slowly steadily as your veins felt empty. How your senses seemed to be more heightened than before. Just like that thirst-

“Y/n?” A man called out softly you turned to face the voice ready to fight only to be met with the familiar face of Gaz. You relaxed having found something of semblance. His clothes mirrored your own painted in a bloodied mess, drenched in it. The smell of the blood was suffocating, loud. It made you hesitate the thought of who’s it was, just hoped it was the fuckers who tortured you.

He was okay though, it made you smile a little. You rushed out to hug him letting a heavy breath out you didn’t realize you had been holding. “Gaz?” You called for him almost unsure if he was even real. A soft chuckle came from him, his arms wrapping around you.

You soaked in the hug, a sense of safeness washing over you. You relaxed in his presence as you pulled away. There were a few moments of silence looking over each other. You let out a short laugh, “your okay.” He nodded in response, “I’m okay.” The peace was short lived as you were reminded of what had happened and many questions were unanswered.

You looked at him as you thought over how to even begin, you didn’t even get time to talk before he spoke first. “Listen we need to talk..about what happened,” you noticed the weary expression on his face like he was unsure. You simply nodded as he continued, “I don’t- you might not believe all the things I’m about to tell you but I’m promising you they’re all the truth.”

You made a move to speak but decided against it only making a move to grab his hand instead offering a gentle smile of reassurance. “And I want you to know everything I did was because I love you okay?” he stated. A nervous breath let out from you as he grabbed at your shoulders, “I’m serious y/n,” you muttered an okay glancing over his eyes.

They seemed at fear as if he’d blink to hard and you’d disappear. Like he was clawing at your existence just to keep it around. “Back there you died and I revived you,” he stated you almost let out a duh before he continued. “But what I did didn’t bring you back the same, the injuries were just to serious and I couldn’t-” he stopped mid sentence pulling away from you and digging his hand through his hair.

“Fuck I’m so sorry y/n I didn’t know what to do and I had to you were going too die,” he was almost shaking as he apologized for something you could hardly understand. It was only making half sense and yet he was pleading like he had committed some unforgivable sin.

“Gaz I don’t understand?” You motioned for him once more but he refused pulling back. “Vampires they’re real, I’m one of them and I changed you into one,” he admitted in a panic tone. You stopped in your tracks before barking out a laugh. “Dude seriously what happened?” You said in between your laughter but the look on his face wrote he was more then serious. You raised an eye brow at him as he turned to you.

You waited staring blankly at him, he didn’t seem to be joking. “I’m being serious y/n,” he had a firm expression, redden glare in his eyes. You must’ve made a face causing him to let out a shaky sigh. Before you could question any further he made a sudden hissing sound opening his mouth slightly exposing the sharp fangs.

“Oh.”

He moved to approach you but you stepped back in hesitation. Still taken aback, unsure of the words coming out his mouth. He looked at fear, scared from the expression he had on his face. You thought over all the instances he’d up and disappear for unpredictable amounts of time. Never seen him eat in front of you, odd accelerated healing rates compared too others.

“Oh.”

He stood amiss as you remained silently staring at him. You waited for the punchline, the end of the joke. It never came, vampires? That shit that only exists in movies or books, shit that doesn’t happen to you. You were normal, just another soldier who followed orders and sent off without a moments notice.

It’s numbing at first, a calm before the storm one would say.“What the fuck did you do? What did you do?!?” you didn’t understand how you felt, anger? Grief? He went to reach for you but you shoved his hands away. Pushing at the man banging your fist at his chest as he stood still. In a way deeming he deserved this at the least for the many things he had taken from you. All for the sake of not loosing you.

“Gaz what did you do?” You pushed and yelled, he hadn’t uttered a word. A sob found its way out your throat slumping in his arms. Your movements slowed thinking over all the things you had taken for granted. Immortality and all for what?

He knew no apology would make it right, it’d be a lie if he said he regretted it. “Even if you hate me till the day I petrify I would’ve chosen the same,” for the very first time in his life he had begged to a god he didn’t believe in. For someone he wanted to keep, “I just couldn’t lose you.” Love will make you do many things out of desperate and that was what Gaz had done. Even if you chose to leave him here it was worse than loosing you in death.

Out of all the things he prided himself in it was behind able to save others and the one person he cared about the most he couldn’t save. Selfish is what it was, “I know.” You replied softly, you would’ve done the same. Your death in itself was a sacrifice you chose to make if it meant he lived, who knew he was already dead? A beating heart on stolen time and pleads for a salvation.

You wanted to be mad, you had every right to but the anger seeped away just as quick as it rose. Traces of his love crawling through. There was a lot you were going to lose, grieving who you used to be maybe even who you could’ve been. Becoming a vampire sure as hell wasn’t on this year’s bingo card but it seemed so thrilling at the same time. That spark in your dark life created in years of servicing as a dog at war. He ignited a flame within you and it only left you craving more.

You felt your body heat up, a thirst drawing from your stomach laying on your touch. Vision pulsating, short lived pain coming from your gums. Brushing your fingers along the teeth searching for the source finding two symmetrical fangs in place. Dizziness struck you making you sway slightly, a hand grabbed at your arm to keep you upright. Your eyes trailed up the arm to meet his gaze.

Your eyes narrowed at him, reddened eyes laced in a state of hunger. “Shit,” he muttered to himself as he looped his arm further around you. He begun tugging you along as you half focused on what was happening. You didn’t have the energy to bother asking as he pulled you into some shade resting you against a near by wall. Hunger, It was the only thing you could think about, the feeling of it consuming you.

He stood in-front of you with a mixed expression. You laid your head back on the wall heavy breaths were all that you could make. “You need to feed,” he half stated. You almost chuckled in response as if it wasn’t obvious. “You can feed on me,” he added abruptly you debated in protest but the thirst drove past the thoughts of saying no. Your hands moved around his face brushing them down around the back of his neck. You tugged him closer with a strength you didn’t expect causing him to nearly tumbled onto you.

His hands slammed onto the wall placed at either side of your head. He let out an exhale, your fingers plying at the skin around his neck. “Are you sure?” you questioned in a softness. “Yeah,” he almost humed his response. You moved your mouth near his neck letting out a hiss, fangs outstretching.

Your teeth treaded along the skin hardly breaking skin, he made a sudden groan as you pulled away slightly. “You gotta bite me love,” he chuckled lowly whispering sweetly in your ear. You bit down on your lip as cravings pooled in your mind, desires dripping off your fangs. They almost hurt in a hungry soreness.

You leaned closer hesitating once more before sinking your teeth into his skin. He bellowed out an animistic growl as his blood flooded in your mouth. It was sweet in all the wrong ways, too sweet. It felt like you were drunk on the the taste, his taste. Like a nectar that was made just for you to drink from. You weren’t sure when to stop nor how too. Your nails dug at the skin of his shoulders pulling him closer almost out of fear you’d lose the taste.

“Y/n,” he called out your name but it was muffled your mind fogging. “Y/n…I need you to stop,” he was panting out his sentences each word coming out mushed together. He was to good too stop, you mewled in response. Sure a vampire couldn’t die from having the last bits of life sucked out of them but it didn’t mean it didn’t drive him crazy.

“Bunny I really need you to stop or I won’t be able to control what happens next,” he groaned out in a frenzied frustration. You pulled away from him, satisfaction filling your senses. Drops of his blood fell from you lips trailing down your chin. You looked up at him as if you were still starved. The smell of it alone carved in your brain. “What if I don’t want you too?” a smirk found it was on your face as he loomed over you.

“You’re fuckin’ crazy, my crazy but still fuckin’ crazy,” he let out laugh staring down at you. You felt a sense of madness crowding you, beckoning you. Telling you pretty lies and desires. You got a second change at life so there’s no use in beating around the bush this time. There was a pause in his movements when his hand firmly gripped your chin. Face inches from yours with a glare of ravenous lust. “Do not say things you don’t mean so flimsily,” your eyes widened in surprise his tone written in preeminence.

“I’m not want you need, just what you want,” he paused a hitch in the deep breath he took.

“So unless you plan on following through I suggest you keep those thoughts in that pretty head of yours.”

Speechless is how he had you. Since when was he like this? Even more damming to say you kinda liked it. His tongue licked up the trail of his own blood from your chin locking his lips on yours. The left over sweetened taste coating your tongues.

There it was that edge, you felt so full yet starved at the same damn time. Further pushing his body closer to yours, finger tips pressing into skin with a hopelessness. Shivers ran down your spine when he finally pulled away leaving behind a breathless state of you. You felt an inch of shame the thought of asking for more crossing your mind. Nail bitingly beautiful he was, he knew that too.

Gaz tended to get a level of cockiness when it came to you. Pride in knowing it was only him that could every truly fulfill you. He found the new you enjoyable, durable, pliable. He wouldn’t have to be as gentle, he didn’t have to hold back. He knew he was no good, shamefully so.

His hand reached towards your face softly taking parts of your hair twirling it through his fingers. He took in a deep breath taking in the new scent of yours, he smiled a bit releasing your hair. He raised himself off the wall grabbing at your hand.

His smile turned into a smirk fangs outstretching, “come on I’ll teach you how to hunt.”

#minzis suga #cod x reader #kyle gaz garrick #gaz x reader #gaz mw2 #gaz cod #gaz x y/n #call of duty gaz #cod x y/n #cod x you

[narrators-journal]

Just a dream

I’m still on a bit of that horror train, so I took a bit of a softer idea I’ve been chewing on for a bit and decided to flex my descriptive muscles. That’s it. Is this super fucking clear? Probably not. But I hope it’s at least descriptive, and effective in painting the picture I want.

I also wanted to explore a bit more of a dark take on my usual writing energy? Idk, kinda hard to explain. I just wanted to write something that crossed wires in a way.

CW: Beware! There be attempted gore ahead! There’s also a bit of a sexual energy, dipping slightly into Ryoji’s darker tastes. Maybe this counts as a hint of Ero Guro? Not super heavy on the Ero tho, it’s just there. The biggest warning is for there being gore.

Minato squirmed beneath Ryoji’s touch, his back arched into his palm, his body offered up for each of Ryoji’s whims. Which, was a sight that brought a soft smile to the god’s face before he dipped his head and began a slow trail of feather-light kisses at the wildcard’s jaw and moved down his neck, then his sternum. “Ryoji…” the shaggy-haired man beneath the god sighed, his cloudy grey eyes focus on the brunette as he continued to leave delicate kisses down Minato’s belly. Each kiss and playful nibble enough to make the muscles below his pale skin flutter, or a shiver run down Minato’s body. A phenomenon that made Ryoji pause with his lips still against the man’s warm skin as he purred, “God, you’re so pretty, funeral lily…” Each fresh inhale of the wildcard’s lavender scent afterwards intoxicating him further.

“R-Ryoji…” And, just like that, the fog of lust was lifted by the distressed tone of the blue-haired man’s whimper. “Mina? Why do you sound so sad all of-” Ryoji didn’t need to finish his question. Because, when he lifted his eyes to look back up to his lover’s face, the pained grimace and tears he saw answered the question. “Funeral lily, what’s wrong?!” Ryoji asked instead as he pushed himself up from the wildcard’s belly to instead reach a hand up to the man’s cheek. Then, his breath froze in his throat.

His fingers. His pale skin, usually the color of a beam of moonlight, was now a sickeningly sticky shade of cherry against Minato’s own fair cheek. A shade that could be tracked down the wildcard’s body until he found the source. The spot where the skin of Minato’s belly had been torn open. A yawning, bloodied maw barely held together by the last few strands of the wildcard’s skin that remained.

For a moment, the sight his funeral lily stained red like this was morbidly beautiful, in that deeply unspoken manner. Yet, the sticky reminder of the blood on his face brought the god back to the reality of the moment. “Ryoji…”

It was Minato’s blood on his face. The crimson color that bloomed across the sheets was his fault. He hadn’t brought his lover any pleasure in exchange for his own. He’d only hurt him. “Ryoji.” The wildcard’s voice called. Muffled by the buzz of blood in the god’s ears as the brunette’s gut twisted and tied itself into knots. “Mochizuki!”

Freed from his dream, Ryoji threw himself out of the bed. Desperate to somehow get away from the copper scent on his skin, only to fall against the sturdy bedroom door before he sank to the floor. With his sapphire eyes barely cleared of sleepy haze as they darted from one corner of the shadow-filled bedroom to the next, the brunette’s heart thundered in his ears. The harshba-dump, ba-dump, ba-dump in his chest nearly so loud, that it would’ve drowned out Minato’s voice when he huffed, “Ryoji, what the hell are you doing?” if the midnight-haired man had not moved as he spoke.

Minato?

Sure enough, Minato Arisato sat on the bed. His voice thick with sleep and confused annoyance, but the snow-colored button-up he was draped in seemed...untouched. His shaggy, dark hair was mussed and frizzy, but the wildcard was in one piece. He was perfectly fine.

He was unharmed. Though storm cloud eyes flashed with lightning, those bolts were what allowed reality to trickle back into Ryoji’s brain through the fog of anxiety and the slam of his heart against his ribs. Until, finally, the reaper’s fear had ebbed. “Ryoji.” Minato said in a firmer, yet suddenly kinder, voice that snapped the brunette out of his thoughts to look at his suddenly-softened partner. Why is he so nice all of a sudden?A dumb thought, for sure, because it surely wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that something must’ve been wrong with the god of death to have him huddled against the door like a frightened animal. And, despite his bad attitude and sharp tongue, Minato knew when honey was more effective than vinegar. “Nightshade, why did you jump up like that? Are you okay?” The shaggy-haired wildcard asked as he crouched down in front of Ryoji.

Yet, his quiet, gentle words still didn’t seem to be enough to receive an actual response from the half awake Shadow. only tears. “Hey, hey shh. You’re okay, Nightshade. It was just a bad dream.” the wildcard swiftly soothed, his hands moved to cup Ryoji’s round, soft face and swipe his tears away with his thumbs.

There was no fear. No hesitation to touch Ryoji and pull him from the sharp claws of his hysteria. “I’m so sorry!” The brunette finally sobbed, unable to tell whether the apology was for his dream, or the tears he couldn’t stop when they poured down his full cheeks and over his lover’s hands. Not that the reason mattered, though, to anyone but Ryoji. “Why are you apologizing? All you’ve done is startle me and have a bad dream.” He pointed out, the brunette only able to continue bawling as he stammered on uneven breaths, “I-I didn’t- I didn’t mean to h-hurt you.” Yet, Minato only continued to soothe him. “Nightshade, you had a nightmare. I’m fine, you haven’t done anything to me, see?”

As he spoke, the midnight-haired wildcard moved his hands from the distressed god’s cheeks to instead grab his wrists and put his hands on his hips. The warmth in his voice, the intimacy of the soft skin beneath Ryoji’s palms once more, with no fear or hesitation, only trust. Seemed to be the final anchor the brunette needed to fully realize that his dream wasn’t his reality. So, the brunette was slowly able to pull free of the self-imposed, irrational guilt and just curl around his lover. “I’m so sorry...for scaring you.” He eventually mumbled into the lavender-scented skin of Minato’s neck while the wildcard threaded his fingers through the brunette’s hair. Now sat in the god’s lap, with an arm draped around his shoulders and a thread of amusement in his chuckle, “It’s okay, Nightshade. I’m honestly sort of endeared that your worst nightmare is hurting me.” which, earned a weak giggle from Ryoji before the two settled into a comfortable sort of silence.

Eventually, they would likely move back to bed. But, for the moment, Ryoji simply buried his face in Minato’s scent to replace the stench of blood and distract from how vivid the moment had felt.

#persona 3 #persona 3 reload #persona #Ryoji Mochizuki x Minato Arisato #Ryoji Mochizuki x Makoto Yuuki #unhinged shit #Makoto Yuuki #Minato Arisato #Ryoji Mochizuki x male!persona 3 protagonist #angst #angst and fluff #attempted gore #Ryoji Mochizuki #male!persona 3 protagonist #scenario

[eldritch-araneae]

So, I have few more theories about Earthspark Bumblebee after watching the trailer for the next batch of S1. So yeah, SPOILERS under the cut!

1) The main reason why GHOST and Decepticons believe that Bumblebee is dead, because he DID die in in the battle. We see him carrying the cube in the trailer, which I have no doubt is the AllSpark. So, possibly Bumblebee died, and then he was revived by the AllSpark, but only Autobots ( or maybe few Autobots?) saw him coming back thus everyone else thinks he’s dead.

The human public seem to like him tho ( look at all this merch!) so for humans Bee just disappeared. Makes me wonder if Bee had some sort of impact on human communities or something.

2) This little theory I have is connected to first one. You knows how important the AllSpark is for cybertronian kind and it’s responsible for making new cybertronians? But in first 10 episodes there was no mention of the AllSpark at all! The only artifact they name out of loud is Emberstone which is responsible for Terran’s creation. Which makes me think that maybe the main reason by legacy cybs thinking they are the last ones not because Cyberrton is inhabitable or they can’t go back, but because they lost the artifact responsible for their creation!

And they accepted that Allspark is lost forever.

But why and what happened?

The possible idea that maybe around Bee’s death something happened, and the AllSpark got damaged or it’s energy drained and Bee was just lucky that his lifeless body was in the way of the last energy pulse that brought him back to life? Or (knowing me who wants more drama) maybe after reviving Bumblebee the AllSparks was ABSORBED by his body and went into slumber, and he has no idea. The only person (or two bc I imagined Ratchet would know) how knows what really happened is Optimus and that why he send Bumblebee away - to hide him with the AllSpark from GHOST and Decepticons. To add even more drama, some bots thinks it was Bee’s fault they lost the artifact and/or Bee feels horribly guilty about it. He failed bc he wasn’t strong and fast enough, which can nicely tie to his “midlife crisis” as Nova Storm put it. Tbh I can see how this can become focus in the second season, bc I saw news it was greenlit already which is nice! If it’s the case I will lose my mind in a good way. It’s Sparkpulse, but in different way aah!

3) The theory is what I feel about his “midlife crisis” because seeing his old alt-mode and how WELL it sits on his body just made me thinking that maybe Bee is trying to force a more powerful and faster alt-mode which doesn’t really fit. (I know there is a popular theory that it’s showing Bumblebee growing up but I won’t repeat it) But forcing the sport car onto himself comes with a compromise. I kept thinking about how thin his arms are in the current form under those big shoulder armor. With it, Bee looks nice, but take them away and you can see he looks a bit disproportionate, esp compared to much strong looking legs. I’m saying this because his old Beetle form looks a lot even and snug on him, while racing form now feel like it’s too big.  One thing I noticed way before trailer, how in episode 8 Bumblebee couldn't even pull his arm out of rocks even tho there wasn’t too many of them. Arcee came to help and crushed those rocks with ease, despite visually being smaller than Bumblebee! It plays great into his canon ofc, because he’s supposed to be the physically weakest Autobot, but I wonder if Bee right is even weaker than he was before? Also the new trailer Bee looks more agile to me while in same episode Bee easily lost his balance and fell of the cliff.

It’s a hunch, but honestly? I just want him to return to his roots and stop with all this “sport car” nonsense, he’s not Hot Rod after all xD But why Bee forces this alt-mode? Racing and speed seem became a big deal to him, maybe that how he coped with loneliness during his hiding period. This ties with my own theory that Bee works hard to prove himself and be accepted, and this would show the additional layer of heights he’s ready to go and sacrifices to make, so people would care and love him. This would be incredibly cathartic if Terrans and Maltos would ensure him that he doesn’t HAVE to do all this just to be accepted by this family. SO, that what I have for now, idk if ANY of my speculation will play out, but I would be so happy and some of that would turn out to be true~

#earthspark spoilers #bumblebee #maccadam #earthspark #ara talks

[tiny-tigers]

I don’t know what else to say then. Trust in his judgement to have chosen someone good hearted and maybe that will ease your pain. Better to feel this way now and be able to move past it and put your own self ahead.

Let's face it your are reasonable and I am not, you are keeping a cold head while I am driven by my own feelings. You are not moralizing the situation but I do feel guilty.

I don't have any solutions at the minute either so expect some more whining and complaints because my life is very difficult and it was the last drop. I am surrounded and having help but my psy is so expensive I might not be able to afford it anymore and I have hit rock bottom like before Jack era while I was depressed and having suicidal thoughts. Therefore I am trying to write it down here my thoughts when I cannot exorcize it, maybe it is not the place but it is my place.

Yes you are right, it doesn't help when people say I am prettier or that she isn't pretty. It doesn't help when I am trying to value her either or when they reassure me it will not last.

The thing is : I need to accept and stop feeling guilty for having "evil" human emotions that are raw and not allignated with my usual values and causes I care about like feminism. I shouldn't drag her down. Yes I am envious and jealous to the core. I never should have been allowed to have some closeness with him because it tears me apart.

That you want it or not he does represent the last thread that ties me to this life so "losing" him is a huge blow to my mind, I am used to the comfort of living in that little dreaming reality where I idealize him so he makes me create stuff , marking the way of my goals , he was the way and the aim. I do improved myself, I traveled, I tried to be prettier-wiser.... always in the hope to be perfect when I will meet him. From meeting to meeting trying to surpass it. I do value his look on me to the point I am desperately seeking his approval. From the page to the hope he simply rates myself a little and can give me some value/reason to continue.

If you are here I guess you already know that tho , your are not landing here without knowing the faithful adoration I have for him.

He is my refuge , here is my shelter when reality hits too hard. He was one of my life crutches but now I don't have content anymore and someone took what I have forever desires and ever wanted. Yes it is hard. Why her not me , why again losing / failing / never having something good for myself. Yes I reached my objectives and I had more than I could hope but for others reasons independent than him I feel like a waste of time and space.

No value, no talent, no charism , no physic to balance feeling wortheless, no job, no lover, friends absents, etc.

I don't belong anywhere, I reach no one, I am simply transparent. Colorless and insipid. I have no taste for life or what it offers. I have nothing and I am nothing. I used to at least have some sort of appeal to the future via next meeting with jack and could handle going from one to another and holding on in between. Now what is the point exactely ? He always been discreet, he will not reach for fans like before and hide with her in the family corner like other players. I cannot exist in his world when he is so present into mine. It does hurt and I am feeling even more bad that it is entirely my fault.

I am the only reason why I feel this bad and it enrages me because I cannot exit it on my own. I can rationalize the situation. I have been delusional, I am not enough and never would have been enough for him. It is so immature to fantasize that way over someone you don't know. Just stop what you have created with the page and lose again something. Cut it all off and live in real world. I have been a stupid silly creature reaching for a star. I disgust me for that to ever think I could have some chance for a change.

I do believe in all that is written here, it isn't self depreciating in an attempt of fishing for compliments, in case you were wondering.

Yes I will move on because I need it for my own survival but please still allow me to be sadened for a while. Never been a positive person, everything that moves me damages me.

Believe me if I could rewrite it I would change it .

#sorry it is sooooo long and useless just to say you are right and I suck #too much sadness this early is bad

[whiteteadreams]

I Wanna Be Yours

Pairing: Idol!Johnny Suh x Idol!Female Reader

other characters- Junko (member of Y/n's group) x Kim Doyoung

Preview: The little puck sized lights illuminated Johnny’s face, you felt your ears slightly perk when he licked his bottom lip, and soon enough you had leaned forward and planted your lips onto the older male’s.

He gasped but still pulled you closer. Johnny let himself indulge in you before he remembered that after this, he’d have to face the consequences. Your overheated body quickly cooled down when Johnny pushed you away. It felt like someone had stabbed you in the heart and twisted the knife, twisted the knife until you were nothing. This man, whom you only met in real life a month ago already had you so captivated in his presence.

You weren’t experienced in kissing whatsoever, but you could’ve sworn that he had kissed back, even just for a little bit.

Word Count: 7.3k

Genre: Idol AU, Celebrity crushes to lovers (?) 

Warnings: Age gap (9 years, Johnny is 27, reader is 18), smut, fluff, slight angst, cursing/mature language, acts and mentions of drinking, reader is drunk at one point, reader and junko realize that they are sexualized, reader has ties to America (race isn't specified and neither is original country), possessiveness, haechan has a crush on reader but almost everyone does, not 100% proofread, let me know if i missed anything

Smut Warnings: Loss of virginity, slight body worship (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), slight humiliation, praising, having to be kinda quiet, oral (f receiving), it is pretty mild, not much foreplay bc it's kinda boring to write imo

a/n- if you’ve watched new girl, you might recognize a scene or at least the inspiration for it, let me know if you catch it! i binged watched new girl over the summer and when i finished it i had no idea what to do with my life afterwards. this has been brewing for a while and the smut scene took forever to start idk why. i hope you like it tho!!

There you were, dressed like the front of a casino and shaking your ass along with your group members. But no one was actually looking at them, all eyes were on you, and only you. The audience was mesmerized by you, and it was no different for the people watching you from home. Especially eight men specifically who were hypnotized by the way your hips swayed from side to side, except one man, he was able to hide his desire much better than the others.

The Dreamies were all next to Johnny with their eyes glued to the screen, Jisung, Chenle, and Mark were sitting on the floor, Jaemin, Jeno, and Haechan sitting on the couch with Johnny and Renjun sitting on the armrest on Johnny’s side. How he ended up babysitting the man children, he didn’t know, but they were watching you perform, and therefore, he couldn’t complain.

Haechan was the one that was harboring the huge crush on you, but Johnny couldn’t shake the sweet spot in his heart for you when he had found out that he was your celebrity crush.

“Now, Miss Y/n, what fellow celebrity has caught your pretty little eyes?” The host wiggled his eyebrows at you playfully and waited for you to answer his question. You giggled a bit and stuttered when you said his name. “J-Johnny Suh, from NCT.”

Haechan, who of course refused to miss a single video of you whipped his head around to look at Johnny. The tall man could’ve sworn that this was how he died, after Haechan broke his own neck from snapping it to look at Johnny, he was then going to break the latter’s.

Both men’s cheeks held a red tone to them, both for different reasons though. Haechan was furious, his celebrity crush liked his own friend and Johnny’s was because you liked him. The world’s sweetheart liked him.

The memory was ruined when he heard Haechan grumbling beside Jeno about how it was unfair that you liked Johnny and not him. “Dude, it isn’t my fault. I’ve never even met the girl.” Johnny was kind of tired of Hyuck complaining. He had started to do his own research on you and found out what kind of person you were like, or how you seemed, some people are different when the camera is around.

Based on your personality, he felt his own crush harboring, the main problem was the age gap though. Him being 27 and you at the ripe age of 18. He hated that your age was the initial reason you were so popular, and he felt sick for the feelings he had attained for you, so to save you both, he hid them as deep within him as he could. It shouldn’t be too hard since you two don’t even know each other.

That was the reason why he wasn’t worried, but that went to shit when he saw you and a few of your other members sitting at the large oak table in the conference room the next day. Fuck.

Johnny, Haechan, Doyoung, Kun, and Jisung were sent an email that very morning stating that they were to meet in the conference room at 3 PM, no later. None of them knew what it was for, there had been rumors around the company that some members of a group would be collaborating with another artist or group, but again, it was just a rumor. Until now.

He looked over at his other members, eyes immediately landing on the younger ones, specifically Haechan. Johnny prayed his aura was much calmer and more mature than Haechan’s at this moment, Haechan was a blushing and sweaty mess, all while damn near jumping on his toes.

“Gentlemen! Thank you so much for meeting us here, we’re very excited for this collaboration!” Your group’s manager was the first to speak up. “Oh course sir! We wouldn’t have missed this for the world!” Haechan bowed in front of the older man as low as he could without getting on his knees.

The other guys, even Jisung, could barely resist the desire to roll their eyes at his eagerness to impress your manager. Anything to get closer to you. The rest of the members gave their respective bows, though not as dramatic as Haechan’s and then nodded to the members of your group that were present.

“Well, let’s get down to business, this is going to be a quick collaboration, one song, and a dance to go with it. It will hopefully be done by the end of the month, which we are aware that isn’t a lot of time so you all will be spending quite a lot of time together.” One of the men that worked for SM Entertainment spoke up to let everyone know what was going to happen.

Haechan and even Jisung at this point were unable to sit still in the chairs that were closest to yours. You just looked over to them subtly when you heard one of their knees hit the table. But your eyes drifted to Johnny, he looked so good. His hair newly dyed grey gave him a, dare you say, dilf look to him. Subconsciously you crossed your legs to soothe the new ache between your thighs, needed to feel some kind of friction, you squeezed your thighs together.

You weren’t able to catch anything else with of the managers said, you were too busy thinking about Johnny, in several different ways.

When the man you were actively daydreaming about turned his head and made eye contact with you, you whipped your head around towards your manager, trying to look like you had been listening. One of the members of your own group that was beside you watched the whole thing go down and lightly elbowed you and threw a knowing smirk your way.

Your skin felt like it was on fire from the embarrassment, but since you refused to look Johnny’s direction for the rest of the meeting, you missed the light blushed that decorated his cheeks and the small smile that formed on his lips.

“Okay! So, did everyone get everything?” You, who were lost, looked at everyone else’s nodding heads and decided to nod yours too. The only thing that was going through your head was Johnny. You just figured you’d ask one of your members.

One of your managers passed around sheets of paper that consisted of the lyrics you could be singing, and he told you a link would be emailed to you with the choreography.

Everyone was dismissed from the table and the five members of your group that was collaborating with the NCT members walked out first, due to being almost late to schedules. The member that had playfully elbowed you during the meeting, Junko caught up with you and linked your arms together.

“Aren’t you excited?” She smiled brightly at you and gave your arm a little squeeze. “Yeah, mostly nervous though.” Sheepishly, you smiled at your best friend in the group. “I’m sure Johnny won’t mind if you mess up your guys’ dance a bit.” You felt your back straighten as a chill ran through it.

“What do you mean our dance?” Junko nodded as she put the small puzzle together, you hadn’t been paying attention. You didn’t know. “Yeah, there will be a part in the dance where we’re in duos and you and Johnny will be together. I’m with Doyoung.” She smiled at the mention of the older man, as she has always found him immensely beautiful. Your brows furrowed and you were now leaning on Junko for support while your group and managers waited for the driver.

“Is that why he looked at me in the meeting?” Junko nodded and after that the two of you held onto each other as the chilled wind nipped at your skin.

The rest of the day was a blur, your mind had gone onto auto-pilot until the rest of the girl group asked if Junko and you wanted to go out clubbing, of course the two of you said no. After your refusal, they touched up their makeup and headed out into the bustling night life of Seoul.

“How about we look at the song and choreo, maybe Johnny and Doie would be like ‘damn these youngsters got their shit together, and they’re hot’ and they’ll fall madly in love with us”. Junko threw a smile over her shoulder at you while she got her laptop. “Solid plan, I love it, fool proof if you will. And Doie? You’re on nickname terms with him already?” She laughed and walked over to your bed, ignoring her own and fell beside you.

“Oh of course, it isn’t like I haven’t spoken to this man before and he isn’t already in love with me.” You smiled at her, realizing just how glad you are that you two clicked. Both being the only foreigners in the group did help, the unspoken pact was something that brought you two together before you had even spoken to one another.

Junko told you about how her parents moved them from Japan to America when she was seven, she was scouted during a public talent contest while she was 13 and instead of moving to Korea, she started training at the company’s building in the states.

You two met when you were asked to step aside for a second. The two of you were told you’d be debuting with 10 other girls, the only problem was that they were in Korea and you, and Junko couldn’t speak a lot of Korean yet, only enough to get by.

Junko and you were in this together, always having your arms linked, you two were going to rise together. Both of you found comfort in each other, being able to speak English helped, and you two had the type of bond where you didn’t have to try too hard, you could relax around each other. You’ve been best friends for six years now.

“Okay, let’s see what type of silly little dance we gotta do with these boys.” You clicked on the link that was in the email and the screen changed to show 10 dances, with names of everyone that was in the meeting today.

The ones that had the names “Johnny” and “Y/n” edited above them were sitting on the floor with their backs to each other. “Doyoung” and “Junko” were just facing each other.

The video started and a slow and somewhat sexy song started playing, the lyrics weren’t including but now finally looking at the paper of them in front of you, you didn’t expect this type of song at first.

With wide eyes and dropped jaws, the video ended. “I gotta grind on him?” Your voice had gone high, flustered and surprised. Junko laughed but it still didn’t mask her own sense of being startled. “We have to run our hands down their chests, get on our knees in front of them, and moan into their mouths.” You and Junko were gobsmacked. “Let me see those lyrics.”

Junko reached over you and snatched the color-coded paper and looked for blue, orange, pink, and red, you, hers, Johnny’s, and Doyoung’s lyrics. Alternating blue and orange caught her eyes and one of her eyebrows raised and she barked out a laugh. “What? Give me it.” You tried taking the paper back and something made Junko laugh even harder.

“You say that- you say that to J-Johnny.” She was damn near wiping tears at this point. While Junko was trying not to piss herself on your bed, you took back the lyrics and sure enough, she was correct. ‘Give it, give it to me. I need it.’ You sung that to Johnny, and he responded with, ‘Take it, take it all.’

Junko and Doyoung actual part that wasn’t just adlibs was softer and a bit more romantic. ‘Please baby, I need you, can’t live with your touch. Can’t live without you.’ Doyoung would sing that part and Junko would follow up with ‘Mind, body, soul, trust me, I’m yours. Use me as you please.’

Now it was your turn to laugh, “Use me as you please?” Junko and you kept making fun of the lyrics of the song through the night, eventually duetting your parts, with the other playing the male, then you two decided to add in the dance.

Junko attempted her deepest voice and sung Johnny’s part and grabbed your hips. When it was time for you to grind back into her, she let out a deep and manly groan. You fell to the floor and kicked your feet. “Junko! What the fuck?” You laughed as she fell to the ground with you.

“Our parents are gonna be pissed.” Junko whispered once the laughter died down. “I did not leave our home so you could go off and whore around on stage with a man much older than you Y/n.” You gave your best impression of your father and that’s when the age gap of you and Johnny sunk in. It had meant to be funny but both you and Junko realized how young you two really were. You were 18 and Junko had just turned 19 and your company wanted you to dance somewhat erotically with two men that had almost a decade on you.

Another thing that brought you and Junko together were your ages, the next youngest member was still almost 3 years older than Junko, you two were always left home when the other’s wanted to go clubbing, so much so that even now that you were old enough, you didn’t care enough.

Staring at the ceiling and thinking about what was happening in your lives was what the rest of your night consisted of. “Junko?” “Hm?” You looked over at her and smiled, “I’m sleepy.” “Me too”, neither of you moved to a bed though. Junko grabbed your pillows and you pulled some of the blankets of your beds.

“Good night, Y/n, I love you.” Junko smiled in the darkness, “Night night, Junie.”

~~~~~~

This calm nights with Junko didn’t always occur when the other members went out clubbing, sometimes they would drag you along. Much like tonight. While you were watching girl after girl hit on Johnny from across the room, you kept downing drinks until your head spun. People kept coming up to you, either asking for an autograph which you gave, but others asked you to dance, with a smile that was promising something else, something you didn’t want.

You were getting overwhelmed and hot, too many people were too close to you, while Junko was dancing with Doyoung and your other members were downing drinks, the only thing you wanted to do was go outside. So you did that, in your drunken state and four-inch heels, you could barely make it to the door.

At last, you made it to the door and walked out and as soon as you felt the cool air on your bare arms, you felt your sweat solidify on your skin.

The music was causing your ears to ring and the streetlights was making your head spin. You knew it wasn’t a good idea, but you still allowed your feet to walk you into the dark alley and sit down. The part of town you were in was high end and you didn’t feel unsafe or maybe it was because you were so drunk you didn’t know what day of the week it was.

Leaning your head back against the brick, you closed your eyes and inhaled dirty smoke-filled air and exhaled.

“Whatcha doing back here?” Johnny peeked his head around the corner so he could peer into the alley behind the club. You let your head roll to the side and your glossy eyes met his. Getting straight to the point you whined, “I want a donut, Johnny” you lips unintentionally formed into a pout and the man just couldn’t say no to you. “Then let’s get you a donut.”

He slowly walked over to you, trying not to spook you, but when you met him halfway by crawling on your hands and knees. The sight of you on the ground, crawling to him looking up with those glossy, half lidded eyes, and lazy smile, he tried his best to keep the perverted thoughts in the back of his head, or at least away from his cock.

“Come on, let’s get you off the ground and get you that donut.” Johnny bent down to your level and just looked at you for a minute. You were just so pretty, and he didn’t feel special for noticing that everyone noticed you.

“Can you carry me on your back?” You quietly asked, almost embarrassed. “You don’t have to, it’s just, my feet hurt from the heels, and I think I’m drunk.” Johnny laughed at how you thought you needed a reason, but he still nodded and turned around, still squatting.

With your drunken mind, it took longer to hop on his back than it would normally, but you eventually got there, and Johnny wrapped his hands around your thighs and held on tightly to secure you from falling. When he stood back up to his full height, your grip on his shoulders tightened. “You alright back there?”

Humming and nodding, you nuzzled your face into his neck, while you were cold from the night air, Johnny was still warm from being in the club.

“Let’s go find you a donut and then we’ll get you to bed, does that sound good?” “Yes, Johnny.”

He had no idea where the two of you were going to get the sweet treat that was normally served at breakfast time this late in the night. Johnny knew that an actual donut shop would be closed so his best bet would be the grocery store that just a block or two away.

Johnny made sure to tell you whenever stairs or a curb was so you wouldn’t get startled by the sudden incline or decline. He liked the feeling of your grip on him tightening whenever he gave you the heads up, he liked the feeling of you holding onto him and only him.

The feeling had to end at some point unfortunately, Johnny’s long legs caused you two to arrive quickly and he crouched down so you could step down from his back. You still stayed close to his side, using him to protect yourself from the bitter wind.

“I know it isn’t a donut from a donut shop but how’s a grocery store bakery donut? We can get you another donut in the morning from a store if you’d like.” Instead of answering you just started walking towards the automatic doors, as you passed Johnny you took his hand in yours and pulled him along for the hunt of the sugary drunken late-night snack.

Every time you were about to trip over your own feet, Johnny was there, following close behind to catch you. The few bystanders all showed mix expressions. Some were judgmental, confusion, or awe. But Johnny gave all of them a polite tight-lipped smile along with a nod. He didn’t have time for any of them, his main priority was getting you your donut.

It wasn’t too long before you stumbled into the bakery section and saw the glass cabinet that’s normally filled with the fried pieces of dough covered in sweet glaze and sprinkles. But with how late it was, there were only a few donuts left in the case. Johnny felt his heart sink in his chest when he saw you didn’t have many options, he looked over to you to apologize but you were already grabbing one of the parchment paper sleeves and opening the case.

“They still have my favorites!” You looked behind you at Johnny and smiled brightly. He couldn’t help but smile back, glad that you’re happy. Johnny walked closer to you and the case, curious to see what your favorite donuts were, you used the parchment sleeve to grab a plain donut with chocolate frosting and sprinkles and then a French cruller with cherry frosting.  

You put them in the small box next to the case and turned towards Johnny. “I got my donuts!” You shook the box lightly at him and he chuckled. “I’m glad, let’s go pay for your donuts.” He held out his hand, expecting you to place the box in his open palm, but he was pleasantly surprised when you switch the box to our left and placed your right hand in his left.

The only register that was open was a young kid, maybe your age or a couple years in either direction. He was on his phone until he saw you and Johnny approach. “Hi, how are you guys doing- are you Y/n L/n?” You smiled a gummy smile at the boy and nodded your head. Your once up-do hairstyle was falling down and into your eyes.

“I am! And this is Johnny Suh! We are here to buy donuts.” You placed the box in front of the boy and started digging through your purse for your card, you were struggling with the zipper and as soon as you were able to find your card the sound indicating the transaction was finished beeped through the air.

The kid was in awe of you, or at least the drunk you, whenever you drank your skin glowed more than normal and you had a carefree aura surrounding you. The kid seemed to understand that taking a picture with you while you were drunk probably wouldn’t be the best for your career, so he settled with just silently looking at you.

“Have a great rest of your guy’s nights, it was nice meeting you two.” He smiled at you a Johnny and handed you back the box of donuts.

You leaded Johnny back outside and spotted a bench a few feet from the entrance. “Let’s eat them here.” You still haven’t let Johnny’s hand go, so when you started walking to the bench, he was pulled along. “Which one do you want?”

Showing Johnny the open box, he slightly frowned and shook his head, “They’re yours, I can’t have one.” It was your turn to frown now. “We can split them.” You looked down at the donuts in your lap and tore each one in half. Giving Johnny the chocolate half first, you cheers him with your own half.

“Thank you, Johnny”, you leaned your body on him, stealing his warmth.

When you woke up, you were in your own bed, Junko was in her bed on the other side of the room, with an extra body in it. Doyoung. This made you think of Johnny who wasn’t next to you, unfortunately, or at least that’s what you thought until you heard a small snore come from the floor. Johnny had stayed with you.

You watched him for a minute before the urge to be next to him took over. You moved your pillows and blankets to the floor much like you did with Junko and laid next to Johnny. The time on your alarm clock read 3:32 AM.

You heard Johnny whisper your name; he must’ve felt you get on the floor next to him. “Yeah?” Johnny didn’t respond, he just pulled you closer.

~~~~~~

The rest of your nights didn’t end up as nice as cuddling with Johnny in your bedroom or laughing with Junko, they ended with pained moans and tired feet. The only reason you weren’t complaining was because, dancing with Johnny is what caused the pained moans and tired feet. Everyone had been dancing towards the deadlines for everything and it was starting to show in your mood.

Of course Junko knew how to handle it, but Johnny? No clue. He knew how to handle his own members, but he didn’t want to mess up anything with you, so he just act the same way as he did before. He asked Junko for any tips for helping you feel better, and she gave him a couple but then turned around and told you that he asked later that night. Just hearing that information was enough to pull you out of your slump and your normal personality made its return.

Soon enough everything was wrapped up and your company parted ways with SM Entertainment, but that didn’t stop the members from getting together. Every comeback meant a dorm party thrown by your group. You hated parties no matter where they were, but Junko didn’t mind them if they were in the comfort of her own place, as long as no one touched anything.

Just because this was a collab didn’t change the fact that your dorm was going to throw a party as a celebration, it just meant more people were going to be there. You all had the dance down, the music video was finished, not to mention the song, perfect. The deadlines were met, and companies were pleased.

Johnny had been late to the party but when he arrived, he went looking for you immediately, only to find no trace of you. Your group’s dorms were filled with people, some you knew and others you didn’t, that didn’t matter though, you were still nowhere to be seen.

“Hey, do you know where Y/n went?” Johnny asked Junko, who was talking to Doyoung in a quieter corner, to which she responded with, “Our room, fourth door on the left.” He just nodded and started his way through the sea of sweaty people.

Fourth door on the left.

It didn’t take him any time to get there with his large steps but what did take a while was him building up the courage to knock on your door. When he finally did, it took a few seconds for a familiar and curious gaze to appear from behind the door and look into his eyes.

“Hi Johnny, do you need anything?” You still didn’t open your door wide enough for him to see inside, just enough for your head to pop out. “Um-” he didn’t this through, he had no idea what he was going to saw, he just wanted to see you. “-I just noticed you were gone and came to check on you. Are you not having fun, you’re hiding away in your room?”

His heart rate picked up when he heard your quiet giggle, but then his heart rate spiked again once he found himself being pulled into your room, out of the crowded and loud hallway, and into a place that seemed forbidden, sacred even.

You and Junko’s room was cold, much colder than the rest of the dorms, and it was dark, except for the small lights in the shape of hockey pucks that were sat upon various surfaces around the room. There were a few things that stuck out to him, the show that was playing, Gilmore Girls, your closet door was open, and he could see several sweaters, mostly brown and green, and then the giant ball of yarn that was being turned into one of said sweaters.

“Which episode are you on?” You had sat back onto your bed while Johnny took in his new surroundings. “At this point Rory has already dropped out of Yale and is well in her process of having one of the worst character developments in the history of weekly television.”

You felt secure with Johnny and immediately cleared off a spot on your bed for him, you wanted him to be close to you. He smiled at you and climbed onto your bed after you got comfortable. 

A couple minutes of silence passed, you switched back and forth between watching the show and watching your crocheting, Johnny was just watching you though. He couldn’t keep it in. “You’re so pretty.”

Your eyes widened and you looked over at him not sure what to say. “Thank you, Johnny, you are too.”  

The little puck sized lights illuminated Johnny’s face, you felt your ears slightly perk when he licked his bottom lip, and soon enough you had leaned forward and planted your lips onto the older male’s.

He gasped but still pulled you closer. Johnny let himself indulge in you before he remembered that after this, he’d have to face the consequences. Your overheated body quickly cooled down when Johnny pushed you away. It felt like someone had stabbed you in the heart and twisted the knife, twisted the knife until you were nothing. This man, whom you only met in real life a month ago already had you so captivated in his presence.

You weren’t experienced in kissing whatsoever, but you could’ve sworn that he had kissed back, even just for a little bit.

Too upset to be embarrassed, you let out a childish whine and opened your mouth to ask him what the matter was. But before you could get another word or sound out, Johnny was already answering.

"Because you're just so young”, there it was, the knife being ripped out. Of course though, you didn’t see the problem. "But you said you liked me and thought I was pretty." 

"I do and you are, that still doesn’t stop me from hating the way I think about you sometimes, because it makes me feel just as bad as the men that send those perverted messages to you." Both grimacing at the mention of the messages, you still didn’t see the problem though. You liked that it was Johnny who felt that way about you. He wasn’t a stranger, he wasn’t gross, he wasn’t some old man watching your fancams while cumming onto their cell phone screens. He was Johnny.

You didn’t know for sure about that last thing, but even if he was like that, you’d be able to get past it because he was Johnny, "You're nothing like them Johnny, you have respect for me and like me for who I am."

"There are some thoughts I've had that haven't been so respectful." Johnny isn't looking at you anymore, too afraid to see your reaction at his words. He had moved from sitting up, to move down so he had room to lay on his back. Your ceiling had a skylight in it, so you were able to look up at the sky as you fell asleep, and you saw that was where Johnny’s eyes were as well.

You scooted over closer to him so you could lay on your stomach, half on him and half on the bed, while you took in his facial features you started drawing shapes across the wide span of his chest. At first, he tensed up, nervous to have you this close and control himself, but he quickly realized that this domestic position was peaceful. Then you asked the question he was dreading, all while looking at him with bedroom eyes. "Like what thoughts?" 

"Don't look at me like that Y/n." Respecting his wishes, you looked away from his face and casted down to view where your hand was placed on his chest. 

"It's fine Johnny, we wouldn't be able to do anything anyways." You were sitting up now with your legs hanging off the bed. Johnny placed his hand on your lower back and moved his thumb in circles. "I'm not trying to pry, but why do you say that?"

"I've never done it before, Johnny." Your head was hanging down, as if you were ashamed. And you were. You had just admitted to the man you desired that you were a virgin.

But for Johnny, his demeanor changed, he was feeling more protective and possessive over you. No way he was going to let Haechan touch you. The weight of the bed shifted as Johnny sat up halfway, you felt his large hand on your left hip. His touch burned your skin in the most wonderful way imaginable.

“Johnny” you whispered as you looked behind you and at him. His eyes were different this time around though, they showcased lust and a look that only could be explained as a predator looking at its prey. “What do you want sweetheart? Tell me what you want me to do.” Your mouth hung open, just slightly in surprise of what you were hearing.

Whimpering, you quietly requested the one thing that made Johnny truly snap completely, “I want you to fuck me, I want you to be my first.” You also wanted him to be your only, but you’d take him in any way you could get him.

His touch was removed from your side and the small fire he lit on your skin still burned hot with the way he was looking at you. He stood up from his spot and moved in front of you to bend down to your level. “If at any point you want me to stop or go even slower, just tell me. The last thing I want to do is hurt you.”

You felt like you were unable to speak but when you just nodded, Johnny lightly but sharply tapped your thigh. The slap made you jump and the wet patch in your panties grow. “I’m going to need words sweetheart. Are you sure you still want to do this?” Johnny was looking right into you, seemingly into your soul. You remembered his rule and despite how dry your mouth felt, you managed to whisper out a yes.

“Good girl.” Johnny said as he kneeled on the bed, leaning over you. His lips ghosted yours and the gasp you let out caused Johnny to smile. And the smile didn’t go away when you leaned in to press your lips to his.

“Can I take off your clothes baby? Wanna see you, just for me.” You nodded and started taking off your shirt while he was talking. Johnny reached out and stopped you from doing anything else, he wanted to be the one to reveal your skin, of course after asking you if that was okay, which you eagerly nodded to.

With just your shirt off, there wasn’t much Johnny hadn’t seen. A lot of your stage outfits involved tiny shirts and big pants. It was when he took of your bra is when he saw something no one else had. Your tits bounced a bit from being unsupported but soon Johnny’s hands were kneading them and playing with your mounds.

As he pulled on your nipples, he pulled moan after moan out of your mouth. And he couldn’t wait to be inside of you. Johnny knew you had to be prepped so he removed your sleep shorts and panties and spread your legs for him. Showing Johnny your wet and shining cunt.

“You’re already so wet.” Johnny went to finger you but how much your pussy was already dripping surprised him. “You make me wet Johnny.” You gasped when he found your clit, refusing to leave the little bud alone.

The feeling of his fingers inside of you caused you to cum, much faster than you thought you were, and it made you a bit embarrassed, but when Johnny said, “Good girl, my good girl”, you felt a lot better. He got up from his spot between your legs and stripped in front of you. Your mouth watered as he removed each and everything covering him. You smiled a bit to yourself when he chuckled at you for staring, but he was back on the bed with his hand between your thighs in no time.

It only took a bit more for you to give Johnny the sign that you wanted him inside you, now. He nodded at you and reached into his discarded jeans pocket to pull of an aluminum foil package.

You watched with keen interest as Johnny ripped open the foil and rolled the rubber onto his hard dick, which you weren’t even sure was going to fit, he promised it would though, so you trusted him. Before pushing in Johnny covered his cock in your wetness as extra lube so he could save you as much pain as possible. It worked until he was all the way in, that’s when you spoke up.

You saw how thick the tip was and you struggled to stretch around it but it wasn’t until all of him was in you, every inch in length, and not to mention the girth.

"Johnny, it hurts, a lot." You winced and closed your eyes, trying to ignore the pain that was shooting through your lower half. To distract you, Johnny kept planting kisses along your neck and jaw, but after a particular loud whimper, Johnny connected your lips once again and seized all movement.  "I know Y/n, it'll stop soon."

Letting you try to adjust, Johnny just kept rubbing along your sides, trying to help you relax. “Just breathe. I’m right here, you’ll be okay, you’re safe.” The pain started to dissolve and form into need, while Johnny was still leaving marks along your neck, you were wanting Johnny to move.

Bucking your hips up into Johnny’s, you asked him to move. “Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.” “Johnny just move please, I need you.” He nodded to himself and gave you one last kiss before he started thrusting in and out of you, slowly at first, wanting you to get used to the feeling of having him inside of you.

When he felt your hands move from their position clamped on his shoulders and roam south to explore the taunt muscles, he took that as the signal to move faster. When your moans started to get louder and become more frequent, Johnny spoke against your ear, "I know baby, I know.”

Johnny didn’t slow down though, he kept up his pace for a few seconds and then sped up, watching your breasts bounce with each thrust. Your eyes rolled back, and Johnny couldn’t stop. Not when you looked like this. Not when you were moaning this sweetly. Not when you were begging him for more and whining that you were going to cum.

“I’m gonna c-cum Johnny, please, don’t stop.” He smiled at the drool dribbling out of the right side of your gaped mouth, he bet your hole would look the same when he pulled out. He didn’t pull out until he came.

You came first but even with the sensitivity you let Johnny use your quivering hole until he was satisfied, after the please was mixed with pain, you clench so tight around his cock that he felt his own eyes roll back. Even then though, he just stayed in you, embracing the intimacy and warmth that was in the air.

When Johnny did pull out you shivered and kept your tight grip on his shoulders. He maneuvered you to be playing on your side, next to him on his back.

“Hey Johnny?” You broke the silence with a small murmur. His hand that was rubbing up and down your back, all while keeping you close kept moving along your spine as he asked if something was wrong.

“No, nothing’s wrong, I just, I was just wondering if this was it for us.” The laugh he let out caused your first feeling to be humiliation but then you heard his quiet chuckle die down and was replaced with his soothing deep voice.

“It might be hard to get our managers and companies to allow us to be together, but I can tell you that now that I’ve had you, I don’t think I’d ever be able to live without you again.” Although Johnny was quite pussy drunk, he still meant every word he said.

The smile your face made was uncontrollable and you hid it into his neck. You didn’t plan on moving but Johnny gently took your head and pulled it away from him. “Don’t hide that smile, its too pretty baby. All of you is so pretty, my pretty baby.”

When Johnny got up from beside you, your first instinct was to reach for him. “Don’t worry pretty, I’m not going anywhere. Just can’t get enough of you.” Johnny had your legs spread and laid between them, you looked down at him and tried to close your legs.

“What did I say? Don’t hide from me.” You nodded and whimpered when Johnny brought his nose to your heat, he inhaled through his nose, taking in your seedy scent. “Smells so good-” he stuck out his tongue and swiped it through your swollen cunt, “-tastes so good too. Fuck. Tastes better than my fucking wet dreams. Such a pretty girl, with such a pretty pussy.”

Johnny was rambling into your pussy; his breath and lips would tickle you and you gasped and whined. Finally getting pleasure from something other than your fingers was causing you to not get enough of it. You were sensitive but you want nothing more than Johnny to make you cum again.

Your hands fisted the bed sheets as your legs started shaking. “Please Johnny, I need you.” Johnny decided to not torture you tonight, so he gave into your pleas. When his tongue made contact with your clit you had to force yourself to not scream, you patted above your head, looking for something, anything to grab onto. Your wandering hand met one of your plushies and you used it to cover your face and to filter your moans.

Johnny moved his tongue to play with your entrance, it was pulsing, clenching around nothing, and you were wet, so wet. “Baby, you’re dripping on the bed.” You hated how you knew it was true. The feeling of it spilling in between your plush ass cheeks wasn’t pleasant. Johnny saw the mess and lifted your hips a bit, so he had access to that part of you. “Wha- Johnny” your head was thrown back and your toes curled. Johnny licked between you and up your ass, collected all the arousal and cum that had dripped there.

The heat of your cheeks was almost unbearable. You’ve never felt anything like this, and you couldn’t tell if you were too sensitive or if you were about to cum again.

 Johnny kept swiping his tongue along your folds, switching between playing with the bundle of nerves and licking your walls. You felt your body get even warmer and your sight went black for a second.

“Shh, it’s okay Y/n. I got you, you’re safe. It’s just me.” Johnny cooed into your ear and petted your head, brushing his fingers through your head, soothing you. Your cheeks were wet, and you asked Johnny what happened.

He kissed your temple before he answered. “You passed out for a second, are you okay? I’m really sorry if I hurt you.” “No! You didn’t hurt me Johnny, it felt really good!”. You started shaking your head and attempted to get up, only to be pushed back down. “It’s okay, you don’t have to get up. I’ll clean you up.” Johnny walked away but returned with a damp washcloth.

It was nearly impossible to keep your eyes open as Johnny ran the warm washcloth over your burning skin. It didn’t get any easier when he started massaging you, focusing on the spots that were tense and made you gasp.

Johnny made sure you were completely relaxed before he got comfortable next to you. “Johnny, I like you, so much.” He smiled at you slurred words, tired, both mentally and physically. “I’m glad, because I like you a lot too.” Johnny pulled you into him, your bare skin touching. He could hear you breathe, and he wanted to hear you breathe next to him for the rest of his life. Although he was tired as well, he couldn’t take his eyes off of you, your shoulders weren’t tense, and your entire body was limp. You were comfortable, and you felt safe with Johnny.

#female reader #fluff #x reader #kpop #nct #nct 127 smut #nct 127 fluff #nct 127 #johnny suh x reader #nct johnny #johnny suh x you #nct 127 johnny #johnny suh smut #johnny suh #johnny suh fluff

[kyracanwrite]

The main (3) class 1 a boys with a S/O who hates their scars

Will do a part 2 later if you want for the other boys

(Gender neutral/ Fem? Reader)

A/N

-This is how I think the main boys of Class 1a would react to a S/O who hates their scars. (Not specified what scars are from or where they are, though some examples are given.)

Warnings: Scars, Hurt & Comfort, self deprecating thoughts, cussing, mentions of abuse, mentions of self harm, these are kind of short.

💔❤️ (small a/n, I actually suffered with Sh for a long time and I have lots of scars scattering my body because of it. If you have been through self harm or even abuse of any forms I’m so proud of you. Stay safe <3 and if you continue to suffer with abuse or self harm please get help. You are loved and we all want you to be safe. )

Now playing—————————————>Running up that hill -Kate Bush

Katsuki Bakugou

He’s very confused at first.

He thinks your scars are bad ass. No matter what they are from. He doesn’t care. He thinks scars show, in a sense, that you’ve won against your enemies.

If the scars have a deep meaning (ex: self harm, abuse, etc.) he’ll comfort you and remind you that it’s in the past.

It’s not your fault for what you went through. He helps you recover as a person, and encourages you to embrace the parts of you that you can’t change.

The past that you can’t get rid of. He wants you to just accept it.

And he helps you reach that point with lots of reassurance and affection.

Lots of cuddles.

If he ever sees you eyeing a scar for a little bit longer than you should he makes sure to trace it with his fingers while you’re cuddling, and makes sure you know how much he loves your scars.

Even if you don’t. He does. He loves them. Your scars make you, you. And he loves you.

He cares about you so much, and seeing you bring yourself down hurts his heart. (Not that he’d ever tell you though.)

Izuku Midoriya

His initial reaction would be concern.

He saw you crying while looking at your scars.

Cuddles you and traces your scars with his fingers.

His concern turned into confusion. How could you hate something that’s a part of you?

He can sort of relate since he has lots of scars on his hand, and he often feels bad about them.

But you were perfect in his eyes. Including your scars.

No matter if they were from falling and cutting yourself, or self inflicted scars, or scars from injuries others gave you. (Purposefully or not, doesn’t matter.)

He loves you and he wants to make sure you knew that.

He asks you why you hate your scars.

If you say they’re ugly, he makes sure to remind you every day how beautiful your scars were.

If you say they bring back horrid memories, he makes sure to remind you that your past does not define you as a person, the present, or the future. It has no hold over who you are or who you are going to be.

Overall he just wants to make sure you know how loved and appreciated you are, scars or no scars.

Shoto Todoroki

Since he has a scar of his own, he understands where you’re coming from.

It’s something he struggled with for a long time. (And sometimes still continues to struggle with.)

If the scar is from you falling or accidentally hurting yourself, you feel stupid for hating it because it really isn’t that ‘big of a deal.’

You think you shouldn’t be complaining over such a small thing while Todoroki has a huge scar on his eye from someone he trusted. (Aka, his mother.)

He makes sure you know everyone has their own reasons for self deprecation (not that it’s a good thing tho) and you should never feel ashamed for having feelings.

If your scar is from self harm, he makes sure you know how strong you are. He reminds you every day that you’re a survivor and you’re so strong for that. He tells you daily that he’s not disgusted or weirded out by your self harm scars. (If you have sh scars there’s always that one person who thinks it’s gross for whatever reason.)

He also lets you know he doesn’t think it was for attention. He knows you were truly and sincerely struggling at some point of time and turning to the blade was the only thing you thought you could do.

If they are from abuse he tells you how strong you are for putting up with that and going through that. He tells you your scars are just battle wounds, and helps you look at those scars in a positive light.

He relates to you, since he has scars from abuse of his own.

He loves you so much and just wants to make sure you know how much he cares about you.

His face may not show many emotions, but his heart is full of them exclusively for you.

Bonus; Todoroki definitely kisses your scars all the time. Even when you’re sleeping.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Like my writing? Cool! Here’s my masterlist <3

#todoroki x reader #shoto torodoki #Shoto Todoroki x reader #todoroki x reader angst #shoto todoroki angst #mha shoto todoroki #mha bakugo katsuki #bakugou x reader #angst #scars #Katsuki bakugou x reader #Katsuki bakugou angst #Katsuki bakugou fluff #Shoto Todoroki fluff #deku x reader #deku angst #deku fluff #Izuku Midoriya x reader #izuku midoryia x you #izuku Midoriya angst #izuku midoriya fluff #deku x you #todoroki x you #shoto x you #shoto todoroki x you #bakugou x you #katsuki x you #kyracanwrite

[alevolpe]

first of all hi I really love your art:)

ok so do you head canon the sailor senshi having scars ?if yes where would they have them?and do you think usagi would feel guilty every time she sees her friends scars because they have the mission/responsibility to protect her in fights ?idk if my questions made sense 😅

but yeah that’s all thank you for your time in reading this :)

Hi there! Thank you so much!

And yeah, I do hc the senshi having scars, but my hc is a bit convoluted. Basically if an injury is caused by a fight when in senshi form, that scar would only show in their civilian form and it would only show if it's form a major injury (senshi healing prevents them from being covered in scars from minor to even some major cuts/bruises). So say sailor Mars gets grievously injured. Rei would get a scar, but the next time she turns into Mars, that scar is no longer present for the time of her being Sailor Mars.

The only exception is if a scar was present from before their awakening, say kid Minako fell down a ditch and broke her leg and she had to get surgery, that surgery scar would be present both in her human and senshi form.

With all that said I do hc the majority of the senshi getting some type of scar/major injury in my 'super hc, definitely detached from canon' storyline.

I see Ami losing some fingers from over-exerting herself, due Mercury not being immune to her own powers (ice). I see Usagi losing her right arm trying to save the two idiot lesbians from Saturn and Mina getting a thin horizontal scar on her face she got while saving Usagi. Mako and Haruka both have scars too, though those are from their childhoods, Haruka lost use of the right eye in a domestic violence incident and Mako getting a pretty major abdominal scar from the plane crash (in my hc I have it where she was on the flight that killed her parents, it's depressing ik, but its there for a reason).

The others I'm wishy-washy on, I don't really like giving scars just cause, I like to have a narrative reason for them. I'm sure as I develop the story more, I'd get a better line on them.

I do see Usagi feeling guilty, but not about most of their scars, she mostly feels guilty for Mina's scar, since Mina got it from saving her. She more deals with a general feeling of guilt for causing her friends' lives to be tied to being a senshi. I'll get more headcanon-y for a moment and say that I hc that being a senshi is not something you can just walk away from, not only responsibility wise, but also physically. The girls have to transform on a regular basis, or their bodies start to get all this built up energy that can cause physical ans mental strain, like headaches, general pains, mood swings and even allucinations. It's basically you transform on a regular basis or you die, straight up. The star seeds have no use for a body that is unwilling to utilize the energy it provides, so it just seeks to kill the host and find a new vessel.

So Usagi would feel an immense amount of guilt while hearing her friends joking around and talking about how one of the girls had to lock herself in the bathroom during class for 10 minutes cause they had to transform and the teacher got soo mad!! It pains her even tho she knows, deep down, it's not her fault, but she's the only person alive she can blame. Her friends will never be able to live a normal life, and it's all her fault.

Sorry this one got a lil off topic, hopefully not too much. Thank you and sorry it took so long.

#sailor moon #this one got super hc #hopefully I didnt stray too far from the subject... #ask me stuff

[motheatenscarf]

I've been working my way to getting all classes leveled up for Talia because... I'm insane and love to set impossible goals for myself. I haven't been talking about too many of them bcs I have nothing to say about most of them, but since I've played through 9 now

Here is a quick summation of my thoughts, ranked from least to strongest reactions I've had;

Paladin: This is boring. I'm bored. I don't care about any of these people or their dumb problems, let me kill class enemy lalafell.

Astrologian: I don't care about these people or their problems, I already know from MSQ and better job stories that Ishgard sucks. These outfits DO rule tho.

Dancer: Huh, that dance to cure people of the morbs turned out surprisingly relevant... too bad it didn't matter! Oh well. Who are these people? What are their problems? Nevermind, I don't care. Dancing scenes are pretty at least.

Red Mage: These outfits rule. But wow, I don't care about these people. I actually weirdly hate this amnesia girl? Not for GOOD reasons, just for like. Trope reasons. Not her fault, but still, I hate when she's here.

Samurai: I don't care until suddenly for 2 minutes at level 60 it stops just being fun Samurai movie homages and tropes and gets REAL with Musosai trying to suicide by WoL. A momentarily beautiful moment that reincorporates and recontextualizes a silly moment from earlier in the story, describing atonement through having to LIVE and make amends, arguing that remorse is what separates good from evil, and wow! This was great! I legit loved- oh, they immediately ruined it with the Stormblood quest to uphold the status quo of a corrupt regime and made Musosai's student morally in the right thus making his death and guilt meaningless.... well, I hate this! Least favorite class story now.

Reaper: I love a mean old battleaxe so Drusilla is rad as fuck and this is some fun lore on Emet and Garlemald in general. I choose to care about this because I headcanon that my own WoL is from Garlemald and this is relevant.

Ninja: This is boring and kinda sucks, but Karasu is here and I love him. An eccentric theatrical weirdo here to test the hero and cause problems for drama? Yes, I DO love trickster figures, thank you. Oh wait, he's not a villain, just a decent dude trying to get out of a bad situation and being cagey to cover his own ass and help you so you can get him out of this jam? Rad. But why can he control bats as his Children of the Night if he's not evil? ... Don't worry about it! I don't know if he's a GOOD character, but my god is he a FUN character. That's all I care about. Look at how much I love Zenos; I DON'T need depth to have a good time. That said;

Dark Knight: I am WEEPING inconsolably over Fray and Myste, chortling over Moogles and Sid, and Rielle is but one of my many, MANY adopted kids from this game. It is perfect. I could talk about Dark Knight for hours, I lost an entire day of progressing through story just having to be insane about the reveal that Emet Selch was a Dark Knight, perhaps the FIRST Dark Knight, because OF COURSE HE WAS. Dark Knights are about LOVE and grief manifesting tangibly, and oh my god, everything ties in together as a coherent whole. I'm not normal about Dark Knight. I'll never be normal about Dark Knight. It invades my brain and gives words to the Things I'm Trying To Say about characters and what I want out of stories. Finding out that the woman who wrote Dark Knight took over as lead writer got me through the worst of how much I HATED base Stormblood and thank god it did because it meant I stuck with this game long enough to play Shadowbringers and Endwalker and didn't consider Heavensward just a fluke. Dark Knight saved this game for me. Dark Knight is incredible. Dark Knight has more to say about storytelling, motivation, and a player's role in and relationship to a story than anything I've ever seen from a SINGLE PLAYER RPG, let alone an mmo. Dark Knight is fucking transcendent.

Fishing: This is the dumbest story so far and I fucking love it. I love traveling the world with this lunatic who took up work as an ASSASSIN to fund her fishing hobby. She has her priorities in order, she is the most correct about the point of this game and I love her.

#Caitlin Plays FF14 #FF14 spoilers

[redjennies]

In regards to Dragon Age, what really gets me is that people miss the part where the Circles and Templars- while both being *bad*- are fear-responses rather than thinly veiled and easily defined vehicles for oppression and bigotry entirely. They’re not equivalent in any meaningful way to real world institutions like that.

The setting established from the beginning that Mages can- even unintentionally- be very dangerous. It’s not irrational to be a little nervous about people that can level city blocks in a temper tantrum, or become vessels for demons by accident, because these are documented realities; it’s not a matter of ‘oo witchcraft!’ because they actually can do those things. Oppressing and holding these people at gun point, who acquire this power through no fault of their own, is vicious bullshit- but it is a flawed solution to a very real problem, not an invented one. Of course they’re terrified! Mages have demonstrated in extreme cases the ability to bend the flow of time or punch holes in reality!! We’ve watched them do it in the games! What can anyone else do about that?

That doesn’t in any way justify the circles or what the Templars do and act like, but the idea that they literally only exist to be the world’s most obvious oppressors is so dumb. It doesn’t help that the setting forgets it too sometimes.

FUCKING THIS THO.

I don't know how long you've been following my blog, but this is like the crux of my major issue with the Dragon Age fandom. it's not that I'm anti-mage, pro-Chantry. most of my personal canon playthroughs are pro-mage because as I said, in the first two games, siding with the templars means murdering all the mages, which is not my personal cup of tea. my issue here is that this specific oppression metaphor does not work for me for the exact reasons you listed, and yes, that's a problem I have with the writing, but I could deal with bad writing if the fandom at large was willing to add this layer of nuance to the discourse.

like at this point, my expectations for DA4 are abysmal. I will play it and I will probably not shut up about it for weeks, but one thing I'm genuinely excited about is Tevinter because the politics of Tevinter actually make fucking sense. as I've said before "RIP to Circle mages, but if I could throw fireballs, I simply would not let guys with swords oppress me." if we're introducing magic to a setting, it makes more sense for people with literal special powers to be the privileged class (or a more than the oppressed class because otherwise, you end up with this metaphor backfire of accidentally saying "yes, oppressed groups are inherently more dangerous than your average person." regardless of whether your conclusion is that "being bigoted against them is still bad."

I've talked about this before too, but it's extra infuriating because Bioware actually got the "how would magic interact with systems of power" situation right with the biotics in the Mass Effect series. Liara having space magic isn't the same as Kaidan being a biotic. Liara is a member of a species where everyone has biotics and has for some time so they know how to use it without hurting themselves. while Kaidan, on the other hand, was part of the first generation of humans to develop those abilities. it's two completely different experiences, and the game frames the problems Kaidan faces as a human biotic as being tied to his specific experience as someone who developed what were until recently supernatural abilities that could kill him (and by his own account, did kill other children like him) and being fitted with a faulty implant due to humans not having the technology to treat him. while he does mention being stigmatized for "being a freak," Kaidan isn't inherently oppressed for just having magic. he is a disabled test subject who the government would quickly abandon to deal with his physical and mental trauma on his own were he not in the military and he is considered "one of the lucky ones." still, while the specifics of his trauma are fantastical, the general theme of what happened to him is rather realistic given how we treat people with disabilities in the real world.

so to circle back to the Dragon Age mages, were it not for the Templars being meanies, there's no real drawback to being a mage in Thedas so long as mage children are trained properly. it has been around for several generations, it is incredibly powerful, and would you look at that? they have been conveniently put in one place where they can easily communicate with each other and organize. seriously, though, how did the mage rebellion not happen sooner? I mean you could make some comment about why the proletariat, the largest class, does not simply eat the bourgeoisie, but that falls apart when you remember I cannot shoot lightning from my hands.

and what gets me is how many Dragon Age characters are thrown under the bus for simply remembering people CAN shoot lightning from their hands. an obvious example I'm still mad about is Sera, who was initially widely hated by the fandom for being afraid of magic when she literally just has arrows and jars of bees. it still drives me up the wall that Anders fans act like Anders' trauma at the hands of templars inherently absolves him of any wrongdoing, but Fenris just needs to get over Tevinter mages enslaving him and be friends with Anders, who is regularly shitty to elves, and join his fight for justice already. like it is genuinely so funny how most of the fandom hated Dragon Age characters like Fenris and Sera and Vivienne because they firstly committed the sin of "having weird feelings about letting guys with fireballs do whatever they wanted while being a minority" and then the Mage Rights crowd who love their white boy Anders will turn around and be like "why would Chantry stans do this?" like WHAT?

#not tagging #sorry someone got me started and this is still my biggest fandom gripe ever #asks