#top ten big mistake posts lol

[goldensunset]

or in other words

#kingdom hearts #khux #khdr #khml #mine: kh #top ten big mistake posts lol

[soundspeachytome]

7 minutes in heaven - shohei ohtani au

summary: Y/N snoops around famous football player Shohei Ohtani’s locker in search for a scandal against his clean record but ends up in one herself.

tropes: friends with benefits, friends to lovers(?)

tw: *slight* smut, mentions of sex, oral (f receiving)

word count: 30,033K words (i'm SO sorry in advance holy shit)

hi! it's been a while. when i made this account, i vowed to write at least once a week but it had been so difficult this month juggling work, my chronic migraines, and seasonal depression (lol).

please note i did not proofread this so plsssss i apologize for grammar mistakes and inconsistencies!!

posting this on the last day of 2023, hoping to give everyone a good read before we welcome the new year. so thankful for this small space to try, linger and reset all over again. hope you had a very merry holidays with your loved ones.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously.

==================================

Locker Lockdown

At around thirty minutes past four in the afternoon, I skimmed the clubhouse for any signs of life. It was only the quiet that prevailed. Clear. 

I tiptoed my way towards the player locker room. I only had around ten minutes to locate the correct locker and take whatever I could find. Discovering the locker area to be empty and unguarded, I felt a surge of excitement. 

Six years later, I couldn’t get my big break and decided sports journalism could catapult me into somewhere big in the industry. This is my last chance to prove myself, otherwise I’d have to reconsider going back home and write Hallmark greeting card messages again. 

Shohei Ohtani’s jersey number is the number 17. Lucky bastard, after all these years and even after going through free agency, he got to keep his famous number, even at the cost of having their senior player give it up for him when he joined the football team. 

And here you might be wondering why I’m doing this aside from my sheer desperation to get an official spot in the workplace and not eat scraps of topics editors discarded for themselves. 

Some people are privileged to a fault.

And I hate seeing him on TV. Or on social media. Or his Colgate-white smile plastered all over my favorite beer and skincare brands. 

Some would say this is the TMZ tabloid level of writing. I say this is investigative journalism. Find out if the famous favorite son-in-law has any flaws of his own and wrap around a bowtie of hidden horrors of sports documentaries. 

And where else can we find this but in the athlete hotpot: their locker room.

I found Shohei’s locker right away as it was the tidiest locker among all on display, with nothing but brand-sponsored clothing hung neatly on the rack. He also donned the top shelf with some dog-eared self-help titles and vitamin bottles. While the rest of the athletes have pictures of their girlfriends, wives and their kids, Shohei has an unreleased polaroid selfie with his dog, Dekopin, just right beside his perfume bottles. Dekopin was looking away, captured in mid-yawn, with his ears raised, and Shohei, smiling into the camera with pursed lips and a snapback on.

I got so immersed into reading the ingredients of his vitamin bottles, trying to find anything remotely related to steroids, or any form of illegal bodily enhancements, that I didn’t notice footsteps from outside the hall.

“What are you doing here?” a voice loomed behind me and I dropped the diet supplement bottle in panic.

Only the sound of the bottle rattling could be heard as I locked eyes with Shohei Ohtani, tall and all muscular. His hair was sweaty and unkempt and his eyes held mild anger and confusion. After the bottle stopped rolling and settled somewhere on the floor between us, there was only silence and the cold sweat building up at my back. 

I swallowed hard. I planned everything from studying the stadium’s entrance and exit doors but I didn’t plan on bumping into him. Not like this. Not when I’m at the lowest level of the social hierarchy right now. 

I could only be ashamed. 

Brain still befuddled at the thought of getting caught, I urged my limbs and picked up the vitamin bottle and returned it back to Shohei’s locker. The plan was not to respond at all and run as fast as I could before the rest of his team arrived. That was the only way to keep whatever dignity I have left. 

“I said, what are you doing here?” He caught my arm mid-exit and pulled me back, tightening his grip. 

“Let go of me.” I struggled to keep my balance and the way my voice wavered was no help at all. 

Shohei saw the camera slung over my shoulder and looked back at me, realization hitting him.

“Y/N, are you a sports journalist now? And were you looking through my stuff?” he said, sounding almost disappointed. 

“That’s none of your business. Let go of me.” I kept my voice steady but his grip only tightened. The sides of my eyes slowly formed tears. 

“What tabloid media do you work for? I should report you. Would you like that? What a shame you’ll be banned from all the games now, right? You nasty journalists just won’t keep your noses away from my business.” he took my camera and deleted all the photos I took of the contents of his locker. I tried to leap for it but he was obviously inches taller than I was and I was no match for that.

“I don’t write tabloid news. If I was, my name would have been all over TV by now.” I grabbed the camera from him and sighed morosely at the lost media. A day’s work is all lost.

“My boss gave me a green light to do a documentary about the team. And the star player.” I wiggled my fingers in front of him, as if to emphasize the word “star” in front of him.

“I came here assuming you and the other players would be here for an interview but no one was around yet. So I hung around a bit and took interest in your nutritional supplements.” Lie after lie after lie. I gritted my teeth and faked a smile. The most convincing lie I’ve learned on almost all my failed dates and relationships was to stroke a man’s ego and have him talk about all the things he is interested in, making him divert his attention to something else. 

“You’ve got really good, um, vitamins for muscle recovery there. Maybe that’s why you got so big and strong, right?.” He looked at me dubiously, nodding responsively to be polite. If he took the bait, then he is obviously just like any other guy I’ve ever met. 

“I mean, I guess? I’ve been doing deadlifts so–”

Approaching footsteps and faint voices were heard from the hall. Shohei pushed me toward the opposite end of the hall, where the showers were located. 

“Wha–” I started but was shut up when he pushed me further into the back of the shower room, swiping the doors closed. 

“Shut up if you don’t want to be caught.” He growled and I recoiled back into the tiled corner. On top of me was the almost rusting shower head who had seen better days, and two bottle pumps for shampoo and body wash. 

Voices and conversations were starting to fill in the locker room that was empty only a few seconds ago. The voices of men echoed through the shower rooms.  You could hear the sound of water turning on from neighboring shower stalls, laughter and tired conversation in the locker area. We were surrounded.

Shohei could be heard laughing with his mates while blocking the door to the shower room I was hiding in. 

“Are you using that, Sho? I could use a hot shower right now.” one of his teammates said. 

“Uh, no, I was just about to use this room, sorry.” he said, almost hesitating. After a few seconds, he entered the shower room and started undressing. 

I widened my eyes and shot him daggers. When he unhooked his shirt from his armholes, I was rendered speechless. 

He had the body sculpted by the gods with his wide shoulders and large pecs that glinted under the light. How could someone look handsome and beautiful at the same time? 

So when Shohei reached for the waist belt of his pants down, I didn’t know why I had choked on a silent scream. I looked away, embarrassed to have reacted like an inexperienced teenager. I have seen and have been with naked men before. This should be nothing new to me and my level. Or so I thought.

I stole a glance at Shohei, who was slowly walking towards me (or to the showerhead, where I stood under, obviously)  in only his boxers on, gazing at me in wild amusement.

We were almost inches apart from each other, foreheads almost touching, breaths almost converging, if you may. If I stand on my tiptoes, I would be almost at his eye-level and I could peck him on the lips if I wanted to. 

If I wanted to.

“Sorry, but I need to shower or someone else will try to take this stall.” His voice broke my salacious thoughts. He looked at me and turned the shower on.

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, I’m supposed to. Aren’t I? I just got off practice and I stink.” He said almost sarcastically.

“So I’m supposed to just watch you bathe and hope I get out here alive?” Water slowly dripped into my shirt, soaking my chest and exposing a bit of my underwear. 

“If you didn’t sneak in here, we wouldn’t have this problem.” He concluded and pursed his lips, not looking at me. 

“Shohei? You okay? You sound like you’re talking to someone.” a familiar voice floated into the shower room.

“It was a video on my phone that I forgot to pause, Ippei-san.” Shohei’s face turned red but recovered quickly, glaring at me. 

“Oh, well then, I thought you finally had a girl in there. I was wrong.” Ippei laughed.

Shohei started lathering body wash on his body at the slowest pace possible. His hands glided through his chest, stomach, and into the dick he’s restraining inside his boxers. Simply having this view had me almost whimpering. If it had been another day, I would have obviously enjoyed this, having a sexy man bathe in front of me, because who wouldn’t? But under my circumstances, I’m only fairly annoyed at being a flustered, hot mess and I couldn’t do anything about it. 

“Oh, fuck, now you got me wet.” I blurted a little loudly as the water splashed and got into my socks. 

Shohei’s widened and panicked eyes shot at me.

In between those short seconds, Shohei was able to respond quicker than my brain could. He had faked a laugh and said loudly, “Well, that’s awkward, the video keeps on playing on its own. Let me turn my phone off instead.” gaining laughter from outside the shower area and then reaching for the small of my neck and closed whatever space was seen between us. 

Based on what I had learned in self-defense training, my initial bodily reaction should have been this: If someone is coming at you from the front, a groin kick may deliver enough force to paralyze your attacker, making your escape possible. 1. Stabilize yourself as best you can. 2. Lift your dominant leg off the ground and begin to drive your knee upward. 3. Extend your dominant leg, drive hips forward, slightly lean back, and kick forcefully, making contact between your lower shin or ball of your foot and the attacker’s groin area.

Instead, when his lips touched mine, I felt my arms throw around his neck and pulled him closer. They say we’re all beggars for something, and this indulgence I had let myself be greedy for. 

When his lips reached mine, I parted like the Red Sea almost immediately, welcoming him and everything that he could offer: the taste of his tongue on my mouth, the smell of honey orange and apricot from his body wash seeping through my nose as I peppered kisses on his chest, and his obviously hard dick grinding against my stomach. When I palmed him, he managed a low growl and caught my wrists.

“Not here.” he groaned.

I pushed my head back inquiringly, both of us breathing too hard. 

“I have no condom,” he tucked a wet strand of hair behind my ear. Under the dim bathroom light, I could see his face and chest were flushed. “Next time?”

“Well, usually when two old friends meet after a fall out in college, they just catch up and have coffee.” I said.

He laughed and said quietly, “Okay, so I owe you.”

“The coffee or the protected sex?” 

“Uh, it could go a lot of ways.” Before he could say more, I palmed him through his boxer shorts and looked up at him, trying to find his limit.

Shohei bit his own lip and tugged the roots of my hair in a bundle, pulling and tugging from the pleasure. To keep himself from making such ungodly hot sounds, he pushed his tongue down my throat and thrusted his hips back and forth against my hand.

As if to make it even, he unclasped my bra and sucked on my already soaked breasts, a satisfied groan slipped from me. We both pulled and pushed and sucked and kissed each other in the crevices the shower splatters couldn’t reach, silencing the moans before it could escape us.  

In that brief and elating moment, while we muted the noise from unsuspecting people, we smothered each other’s groans and reached our highs in the quietest, most pleasurable way possible. 

=========================================

7 minutes of heaven

It’s strange how I always find myself in the most ridiculous situations. 

The next few occasions that I’d meet Shohei would be wordless and timed interactions in enclosed spaces. We’d see each other in public and pretend we didn’t know each other but slip each other notes of the next place we’d secretly meet. It all felt strangely exhilarating to keep a secret like a fifteen year old would, with all the sneaking and running. 

We’ve explored almost every nook and cranny of the stadium, discovering hidden spots of our rendezvous. We’d meet up in a different bathroom and he’d push me on my back while he fucks me repeatedly on the bathroom sink. Pre-game preps meant I gave him blowjobs in his manager’s office hours and hours before everyone even arrived. 

Of course, when we ran out of places to hide, we’d go as far as looking for the next empty parking lot and tried to fuck each other noiselessly.

“So when can I take you out for dinner?” he had asked one day, when he dragged me out to meet with him around after midnight. I wouldn’t let him inside my apartment and I refused to do the deed in his either, so he’d bring me to places that only us knew, to fuck, to kiss, sometimes to talk, but more often, to drive each other’s pleasure and only that. 

Because god forbid we both catch feelings and lose the fun, right?

So no talking, no sharing of personal details, no anything. 

We were in an empty parking lot, away from the lampposts and streetlights. Shohei had made sure that we were well hidden in the dark. 

He had his legs spread while sitting on the driver’s seat. His hands, warm and wide, rested on my hips and thighs, lightly urging me to ride him slowly.

Soft RNB music played on the stereo, it was a quiet, still night. It was both our day off so he had wanted us to chill and take the sex slowly.

Slow meant gazing at each other’s eyes–gaze, not look–with endearment or adoration, not lust or pleasure. Slow meant thinking the unthinkable thoughts. Slow meant being vulnerable while coming undone.

And I don’t want the slow and quiet moments. I wanted the fast and rough with no time to talk, gaze or even think, just one hundred percent fun and debauchery. 

“Mmm. Maybe when you show me your photos,” I avoided the question but I also knew Shohei would never show me the photos he had taken–past and present. Even when we had been buddies for an entire semester, he had, not once, shown me his portfolio. 

“So probably never, right?” he gazed up at me with his creamy brown eyes, hands caressing my stomach lightly. 

“Probably,” I muttered and with that he had gripped my thighs tightly and moved his hips upwards to meet me. I moaned when he hit me in the right spots. Any sign of softness he had shown a few moments ago was gone, and only the roughness and unsettling disconnection remained. 

This particularly fine day, I would be standing at the mercy of his mouth. He had dragged me to an empty storage room in the east wing of the stadium, hours after practice. According to him, the area stands the exact opposite from the lockers so most people hardly come by. How he had found out about this, I had no idea. 

He was kneeling in between me, my right leg hooked on his shoulder, giving him more access and my hands tugged at the strands of his hair every time he licked my sensitive clit. 

Shohei’s tongue grazing against me had left me quivering in delight. He stands up and kisses me, giving me a taste. My fingers started unbuckling his belt when he felt his phone vibrate. 

“Oops, Ippei’s looking for me.” He pockets his phone, looking forlorn, as if telling me he didn’t really want to go yet. “See you again next time?”

“Yours or mine?” I had asked, brushing up and straightening my wrinkled dress. And when I realized what I had done, Shohei’s eyes shot up and he beamed widely. 

“I just– I- I want a proper night with sex, you know.” I explained, trying to sound nonchalant. “It’s so uncomfortable having to go commando at work after you had just literally sucked the life out of my vagina, Sho.”

“Mmm-hmm.” He smiled even more.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” 

“What? Fuck off.” By this time, my face felt hot and had probably looked red like a tomato, which probably amused Shohei even more. 

“Your place, then. I’ll call you.” he gives me one last kiss then heads out first, leaving me a dazed and pulsating mess.

A shrill sound knocked me awake. It felt like seven thousand screaming hungry babies in my ear, bouncing off around my brain like a pinball. 

I looked at the digital clock on the bedside table and saw the time glinting behind the glass: 8:41 PM. I must've fallen asleep after taking a half day off from work, feeling nauseous and slightly feverish. It seemed that whatever body malaise that I have been carrying inside me earlier had sprung into a full-blown ailment.

 I pushed my body up and walked groggily to the source of my misery. 

Someone was buzzing the doorbell and repeatedly pounding on the door. Great.

“If you’re not dead or dying behind this door, you’re about to be.” I croaked harshly, throat burning; putting all my remaining energy in pulling the door open. I was greeted by an extremely tall man with frantic brown eyes, searching my face.

“Oh, thank fucking god. I’ve been knocking for half an hour.” he wrapped me in a tight hug, I almost collapsed. Partly because of the throbbing headache and overall discomfort that I already felt, but hugely because of the warm minty scent of Shohei Ohtani. 

“Jesus, you’re burning up!”

“What are you doing here?” I said, struggling in his grip, his face resting on the curve of my neck. “You’re not supposed to be here.”

“You don’t text someone ‘at least i’ll die happy today knowing that my last meal was shoyu ramen’ and then not fucking reply after.” We were still standing by the entrance, his face now angled towards me, a look of concern or anger mixed in his face, I couldn’t tell. My cerebral cortex functions seemed to have shut down after witnessing this unexpected tenderness. 

“Medicine knocked me down cold.” I shrugged weakly. 

Shohei pulled me into the bedroom and tucked me back in, apologizing for his intrusion, putting down plastic bags of what seemed to be groceries on the kitchen counter, and went back to lightly scolding me for proper texting etiquette to family and friends, to anyone really. That my dark humor doesn’t translate well in messages and that I could have really died and people would think I’m joking but really, he got so scared that he went here as fast as he could.

I don’t remember much but in between fever dreams and my ibuprofen haze, I faintly remember the savory taste of rice porridge exploding in my mouth, the constant dabbing of a cold towel on my face, neck and chest, sometimes, my back, too; the smell of rubbing alcohol and a large, gentle, almost loving touch. 

I don’t remember much but in between waking up in the darkness and stone-cold silence, I remember soft forehead kisses until I drifted back to sleep; of big strong arms enclosing me into a big embrace, as if to tell me, you can put your guard down now. you are safe here. 

I don’t remember much from coming in and out of slumber, but I remember thinking: wouldn’t it be nice if this wasn’t a dream?

======================================

Reset

In the end, I quit sports media on my own volition and got into a friend’s ceramics house. I have always had a thing for ceramics and sculpting as early as college, where I had met my then-professor and now friend–who happens to be the owner of mentioned ceramics house. She had always praised me and encouraged me to join her when she first opened the shop, but as someone who had musings for writing at the time, I politely declined and pursued, you guessed it, journalism. 

I’ve always been good at writing, no doubt, from the way professors always had a good word for me, but I always seem to get into the wrong places every time. Time moves fast if you’re a journo, if you’re slow, then the news is rehashed news, it would just be a late-night recap at a midnight slot that no one is ever awake to watch. 

Here, inside her shop, it was quiet, and time moved slowly. I can get into my laziest clothes and no one bats an eye. I can finally retire my stilettos and straight cut blazers. 

It was all so going well. The customers were always mid-twenties who got interested in our social media marketing of creating your own mugs and other ceramics and always came in in groups, duos, and solos. 

Slowly, I realized that not everyone gets to the places they want. Even when you work blood and sweat for it. Not all were built like, say, Shohei Ohtani, whose talent was recognized early and afforded him an automatic slot in the big leagues.

Some are born to be big icons and some, like the rest of us, are meant for smaller, softer spaces. I get that now. It finally felt like I was in the right place and pace. 

All this positivity and good timing felt all too good to be true and been proven accurate when the scandal blew up. 

Shohei Ohtani photographed exiting his LA apartment with a woman in his arms.

Shohei Ohtani’s rumored girlfriend receives backlash from fans: READ MORE

EXCLUSIVE: More photographs of Shohei Ohtani and rumored girlfriend driving away in his Porsche

Rumored girlfriend of Shohei Ohtani: Who is She?

When I say it was everywhere, I meant it exploded right in front of our faces like a million confetti, falling and twirling fast. It was unstoppable. It was inevitable.

I felt my limbs go numb when I read the morning news. There in bold and black letters was the headline, my name and a clear photo of me holding Shohei’s arm, smiling. A certain news outlet had gotten juice of us and our secret hideouts and had spread all over social media like wildfire. You know what’s funnier? The media outlet that released this was my previous employer. The same company that asked me to snuff out a controversy. While I had failed to give them the news they wanted, I had unintentionally brought them an exclusive that wrote my entire name–and face–off the map and potentially ruined Shohei Ohtani’s clean record. 

Shohei Ohtani, despite his happy-go-lucky and passive demeanor, was a very serious and straight-laced person. I already knew this in university but I got to see more of this side of him when we had started the fucking thing. Even though I had clearly told him that I didn’t want any strings attached, it was unavoidable to give and receive bits and pieces of each other when we’re not naked. 

I  did enjoy talking to Shohei under the sheets. His ingenious ideas and the way he talked about the things he adored spilled all over him, like afternoon sunlight streaming in between curtains, making way even through the small spaces to cast his light. I basked into this warmth as much time allowed me, because who knows when I can experience the glow of his presence again after all the chaos. 

He was exactly like the golden hour: a warm afternoon orange luminescence that usually only stays for ten to fifteen minutes a day. If you wait too long to look up, he disappears quickly as he goes, leaving only the faint orange, yellow and pink hues chasing after him before the black of the night takes over you. 

Well, now the fairytale has run its course and the sun has set to announce that golden hour is over. Night has finally fallen on me and I’m feeling scared and alone.

The first thing I did was to grab as much stuff as I could and put them all in my luggage and filed for an indefinite leave. 

As if like clockwork, my phone rang and saw Shohei’s name on the caller ID. I didn’t answer. I couldn’t. What could I possibly say to him? That I used him just for the clicks and the views? That after all this time we spent together, he would realize that I am still the same despicable, scathing piece of garbage who’d trample on anyone just for a few cents?

So I don’t answer. Even when he calls back again and again and leaves me twenty or more messages by the hour. I turned my phone off. The latest message from Ohtani coming up on the notifications bar read, “Where are you?” before the screen flashed to black. 

I have nothing but my pride left. I’d like to keep it that way.  In such a way, I was embarrassed, too. I thought I finally had something to brag about. A job that I actually liked and enjoyed, a peaceful mind, and the possibility of liking a guy who had shown me nothing but kindness. 

And because I couldn’t handle all of this, I handled it like I have always handled things: I ran away like a coward. 

I rode a bus without reading its destination card and let it drive me away as far as it could, to someplace where no one knew me or Shohei Ohtani, or had any idea about the news. 

The bus drove away and I never looked back. 

================================

Waiting Until My Spring Comes Again: Shohei’s POV

Just like that I lost her. She wasn’t even mine to begin with. 

When the news broke out, I was so furious that I wanted to drive to the news outlet that published the article and give them a piece of my mind. I knew my blind rage would have done more damage so I didn’t.

Instead, I looked for her and wanted to let her know that whatever happens, I won’t drop her just like that. That I’m willing to acknowledge the rumors and make it official, if she wanted to. 

I’ve always been open to the idea of taking it to the next level with her but every time I broached the subject, she would change the topic, get into a foul mood, or try to pick a fight with me. Which I found endearing. She’s so adorable when she pouts. And when she pushes her luck thinking a five foot four girl like her can withstand someone as tall as me. 

I just can’t help but laugh and feel a flutter in my stomach. She’s someone who has been adorable and held a special corner in my heart. 

Y/N’s face was so expressive and whatever emotion she was in it would always be evident on her face. When she’s happy, a dimple on her cheek shows up. When she’s feeling sad or down, she’d look downcast and would prefer that you leave her alone. When she’s thinking about something deep, she would chew on her lower lip and always had a blank almost unfocused stare. Despite her many faces, I’m sure as hell that I love all of them. I wanted to be by her side when all this shit happened, I wanted to see which face she was making. Is she pissed like I was? Is she sad? I wouldn’t know. The moment her number didn’t connect after I had tried reaching her, I already knew that she was avoiding me. 

I lost count of how many messages I had sent her, of how many missed calls and voicemails I left her. She was unreachable. She gave me her spare key so when I tried visiting her apartment, it was empty. 

She was gone. 

And only the traces of her lingered in her apartment. Her unwashed mug with leftover stale coffee was on the kitchen counter, specks of lipstick staining the mouth. Dirty clothes hanging on her bathroom door, forgotten and unwashed. The peachy scent of her purifier that always latches on to her clothes whenever we go out. Her unread books on her coffee table, some dog eared and annotated. 

Everything that I love about her is here except for her and I miss her. 

For the next couple of days, I dodged the media and focused on training, playing and practicing. Those three over and over again. I tried to not think about her and lose sleep because of her. An athlete’s wellbeing is connected to quality sleep. 

But she was everywhere I went. Pieces of her were scattered all over the places I avoided, and it was my fault really, for bringing her to places we usually hid. For hoping that someday, the secrets we hid would be our stories to tell. Now I just let her memories rot inside my heart, where she should be. 

I thought it would be easier when you just let it slip by but the more days that passed without seeing her, the more I feel a gnawing pain in my heart. She had sucked all my sunlight and took it all away with her. 

I want her back. 

=====================================

My Answer is You

Eleven days. It took me nine days to realize running away was a bad idea. 

When I first got off the bus, I thought the place looked familiar. Turns out, I rode the bus to my hometown, to the very south and the last bus stop until it turned around to go back to the city. 

When I appeared in front of my mom–the first time in a long time–she had immediately said, “Did something in the city?”

The moment she asked, I broke down in tears. She shushed and consoled me while I cried like a little kid. Like the way I had bawled to her when my first boyfriend broke up with me, or when my love birds died from illness, the other from loneliness. 

It feels like I would die of loneliness, Mom. I had said.

Did he really say that? Did he tell you that it’s over? She cooed.

I was embarrassed to admit to my mom that no, Shohei had never told me anything because I had shut him out even before I could give him the chance. But what if that call was already the end of it all? What if answering his call meant exactly what I had thought. That would shatter me more. 

So, no, Mom, you can call your daughter a coward but in her heart, it’s all over. 

The next forty-eight hours at home was a blur. After feeding me with what feels like a day’s worth of homemade dishes, she made me wash the dishes, clean my old room, and the living room as well. And when that wasn’t enough, she made me go with her to the night market and bought whatever seafood she could find to feed me. 

Is this what you did when Dad left? I wanted to ask her. Did you go around acting as normal while nursing a wounded heart? Did you go all through that facade just to show me that you were strong for the both of us?

She had her back to me, her hands pale and creased with age, showing signs of passage of time and her hardwork to put me to school. I know she was trying to make me busy to keep my mind off of Shohei. I’m not sure if she fully understands the scandal but she was trying her best to keep my head above the water. Probably just like how she always did. 

I wish I was strong like you, Mom. 

On the fourth and fifth day, she had let me work under the sun harvesting corn. Which I absolutely despised. I had to wear sun hats and these jumpers to cover myself from the heat. 

“It’s cheap labor for letting you stay and eat my food,” she said when I complained. “Tomorrow, you’ll help me sell these at the market.”

As the days grew idly by, I’ve grown more accustomed to rising early and eating less meat and more vegetables. I willingly went out of the sun more to do housework, like hanging clothes, watering Mom’s plants, however, I was still not willing to harvest her vegetables, which she made me do a lot. When I say a lot, it means everyday since then. 

On the eleventh morning, I woke up earlier than usual and found my mom already awake. She busied herself with a cup of coffee. 

“Good morning, mom.” I yawned, grabbing my own mug. 

“After breakfast, pack your things and go back to the city.” She said quietly.

“Huh?” I’m not sure I heard her right. Is she kicking me out?

She pushed today’s newspaper into my hands and pointed at an article. An article shows a picture of Shohei smiling at the camera, behind him was a framed candid photo of me turning my head just in time when the camera clicked, I was wearing a sleeveless shirt, a shawl draped over my shoulders, and the wind blowing my hair and covering my face slightly. Just by looking at the photo, it looked like a time when Shohei and I drove to the beach. He had brought his camera and took a lot of photos. 

The article said, “Portfolio on Love: Shohei Ohtani’s Photographs Displayed for A Cause.”

“....and when the powerhouse athlete gets a day off, he plays around his camera and takes photos of anything, everywhere. He reveals Insider Today that for the first time ever, he is displaying his portfolio to the public at the Grand City Museum starting today until the 31st of the month, with the theme of “hello, love, are you there?”

“...’I don’t know how else to define love but this. I hope when the public sees this, they will instantly know that my photographs are a reflection of my love,’ he said.

“When asked if this was a confirmation to the rumors flying around recently, he just smiled sadly and said, "I'm hoping that this answers everyone’s questions, especially hers.”

“If your face is plastered on all of the newspapers, it wouldn’t make sense to stay here longer.” Mom said after a while. She had finished her breakfast and took them away to the sink.

“It doesn’t end well if you’re too afraid, my darling.” she said, not looking at me. “To love and to be hurt is to be brave. If it doesn’t work out after facing him, then by all means. Come home. My doors are always open for you. And I will feed you rice cakes while you harvest my corn.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. She wasn’t a hugger but welcomed my hug and patted me on the shoulders. “Now go, before all the chismosas wake up and corners you.”

I packed my bags and left home, my heart pieced back together. It was not wrong to go home and seek shelter. What I did wrong was leaving Shohei all alone when he took most of the fall. 

Five hours, one taxi ride, and a ten minute walk later, I arrived at the city museum, nervous, anxious, feeling a little lightheaded and hesitant. I wiped my sweaty palms and got inside. 

It was not as packed as I had expected, probably because it was a little over after lunch, though there was still a relatively big crowd overall. 

When I stepped into the hall featuring Shohei’s displays, I felt a surge of emotion. It was a collection of all the photographs of his loved ones. In a black and white collection, he had photographed his parents holding hands while walking in the snow, a photo of his dog sleeping idly on his couch, a photo of the football stadium in a wide angle shot, showing Ippei and the rest of his teammates playing a warm up game before practice. 

When I turned to a corner, that’s when I saw it. There were multiple frames hanging intricately on one side, showing all of the photos he took of me. One during university days, where I was showing him a strangely large eggplant during our photo walks at the market. There was another with me looking at him angrily for reasons I couldn’t remember, and a more recent one, in the middle, where he was holding my hand while I walked forward, back facing the camera. 

On the metal plate below were words that read in cursive: “2009–present. Moments of love that I hold dear.”

At that moment, tears had started rolling down my cheek and I couldn’t help but sob. The onlookers nearby started moving away, probably weirded out by the sudden burst of emotion over some piece of art.

They weren’t just pieces of art. These were moments when Shohei and I were together and maybe realized that it was love.

By then, someone on my left offered a handkerchief and I gingerly took it, wiping my tears-strewn face. I muttered an apology for ruining the fabric.

“This is not the first time someone cried in front of my photographs. Some were absolutely heartbroken after seeing them.” a man’s voice said. And that reeled me back as I turned around and saw Shohei standing in front me.

“I knew this would lure you back,” he said, smiling.

His face was a little gaunt and tired. He had dark circles around his eyes that I’ve never seen before. I could only look at him and he looked back. I had so many things I wanted to say to him, so many things I wanted to explain but he spoke first and said:

“Did you get a tan?” he started, raising an eyebrow.

“I-I was harvesting corn!” I said, covering my face with both hands. I didn’t even have the time to put on makeup or a swab of lipstick and that’s the first thing he notices.

He took my hands and held them tightly against his chest. “No one looks this beautiful even after harvesting corn.”

“Shut up,” I said looking away.

He tipped my chin and held my face. “Let’s start again, shall we?” 

I raised an eyebrow in question.

“Hi, my name is Shohei Ohtani. I’m an athlete and an amateur photographer sometimes. I’ve been in love with the girl in the photographs since forever.”

I managed a smile and laced my hands around his neck. “Hi, I’m a ceramics maker and sometimes, a farmer, you should see the corn I harvest. You look so familiar. I think you look like my future boyfriend.”

His eyes perked up and laughed at our silly little game. He went in for a kiss and I obliged, feeling safe and brave in his arms.

Let them take the damn photographs and write the articles all they want, but they could never take my sunshine away ever again. 

#shohei ohtani au #shohei ohtani imagines #shohei ohtani #shohei ohtani pov #shohei ohtani fluff #shohei ohtani smut

[erisenyo]

oooh writers asks 👀 5, 12, and/or 28 for a fic of choice!

5. What is the perfect environment for you to write in?

Gotta have my lap blanket all tucked around me, my water/tea for hydration, my snacks on hand, absolutely no one who I know around me because I am highly distractable, *except* that I write best with some kind of low-attention sporting event on the TV, the kind of thing where you can just glance up when the announcers get hyped and watch the replay and otherwise it's background noise.

Also recent addition of this dude on my lap, though I would not say that this makes for a perfect *writing* environment but is very cute haha

12. Is there a trope you haven’t written yet but really want to?

Oh man, SO many. The ideas I have haha. Current top of mind is a Time Loop idea I've had kicking around for like two years.

Zuko dies in the confrontation with Azula, resets to...the Agni Kai? And he tries all these different things, fighting back, trying to flee, trying to find the Avatar sooner, trying to save Yue, trying to just walk away from it all, trying to hide in the palace and stay with Azula (Azula asks if he's a ghost and he laughs and says sure, why not, because at that point who knows what he is. And he learns, later, that playing into her mental state is a mistake). Anything he can think of to try to figure out what he's supposed to do

He goes South and gets accepted into the tribe and waits a few times. He explores the Earth Kingdom and meets Toph and Jet. He goes North and grows up alongside Yue. He works his way into the White Lotus. He kills Ozai in the night. More than once. He dedicates a few lives to fucking with Zhao. He tries asking Iroh for help before the Agni Kai, and Iroh dies burning and Zuko never tries that again.

Sometimes he just follows the original timeline, because after a point there's some comfort in knowing what comes next and where it all ends. He tries to remember the things he said before, to pantomime his way through it, but eventually even that is lost to him because he knows too much, has seen too much, changed too much for it to stay the same. An appreciation for tea doesn't seem like a big thing, or a sudden talent for pai sho, but little ripples have big impacts. It's not just Zuko, it's the people around him reacting.

And he eventually learns that a side effect of reliving these years over and over is that he's becoming so fucking old within his own skin. He's lived too many lives to count, has even managed to grow up a time or two, but to the world he's just 13, 14, 15, 16 again. He's fallen in love with everyone in the Gaang at some point, with Yue and Jet, with Song, but the last time Jin kisses him makes him feel ill because she's 15 and doesn't remember all the times they've done this before and he isn't and he does.

The problem with a time loop AU, I'm realizing, is that it can hold every other AU you can think of some way or another. Planning is...difficult haha

28. In [x fic], what is a happy, post-fic headcanon you have about [pairing]?

In To Be Named, To Be Known (To Be Loved) after the wedding, the intricate fancy knot that Mai helped Zuko tie gets stuck and Zuko gets trapped in his clothes and Sokka is laughing too hard to help him undo it and Zuko doesn't want to harm his wedding clothes because they're special and they matter but he also doesn't want to be stuck in ten layers for the rest of his life so...

He ends up needing to call Mai for help and she reminds them of it every anniversary lol

For this writer's Behind The Scenes ask game!

#asks and answers #ask games #Time Loop AU on the mind in the fandom recently it seems #It does sound super angsty as written but consider: the comedy of actually 60 year old but looks 15 Zuko hitting on The Boulder

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Suspicious IG Stories of Late

I could have sworn I posted about this, but I’ve gone through all my posts for the previous 2 weeks, and apparently, I didn’t. Such is the life a writer who has ten zillion things tumbling through her mind all the time, lol. I either think I’ve posted and haven’t. Or think I haven’t posted and double post. Lol. So glad you all bear with me.

For the record, I was probably thinking about @mindynichole​’s excellent post about recent IG stories and actors being in Paris. You can read it HERE.

SOOOO.

Last week, Norman posted this in his stories:

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Also, I noticed this in Norman’s story today.

Not only is it green, and it stands out against his dark vest (sidenote: he’s filming the spinoff and back to wearing no sleeves; I’m totally side eyeing that. Yeah, it might be very warm where he’s filming, but it’s been a long time since he had no sleeves. The last time might have been S5?)

Anyway, this really might be Norman being Norman. I thought of that semi-famous interview from Georgia where he pointed to a ladybug that landed on his arm. This is similar. But at the same time, the ladybug is a symbol of Beth, and now this is green. So, I can’t help but be mildly suspicious. Thoughts?

@wdway:

I'm so happy to see Daryl's arms again. I believe we haven't seen them since s7. I just know that his costume changed, and he began wearing sleeves or rolled up sleeves when he got to Hilltop after escaping the Sanctuary. The insect is green on his shoulder, but I am pretty sure that that's a Praying mantis. Might want to check that out but I don't think it's a grasshopper and the next thing would be a Praying Mantis. Which opens up I whole other symbolic meaning of Greene and praying.

I actually checked out a book on insects from the library the other day. What is on Norman/Daryl's shoulder is a Praying Mantis. I circled it at the top of the page. Below is a Grasshopper. No mistaking the two.

@galadrieljones

Just need to say it. This man’s shoulders are a work of art, lol.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Totally agree!

@galadrieljones:

I like the notes on the praying mantis. Also, didn't somebody mention the other day that Norman was in Cleveland or something? I wanted to reply but got side-tracked. Is it possible he's filming in Ohio...?

@twdmusicboxmystery:

People are saying both Christian Seratos and Cassidy McClinty (Lydia) are in Paris, and therefore must be part of the spin-off. Still conjecture, of course, since neither has been seen filming. But then again, neither had Norman. We know about him because it’s been announced and he’s posting about it. Both of them being there while he’s filming and NOT being part of it would be an awfully big coincidence.

Haven’t checked on the truth of this yet, but I don’t think it would have been sent to my inbox if it isn’t posted online somewhere.

@wdway:

Three TWD actors in Paris at the same time seems very suspicious. Then again, it's hard for me to believe that their acknowledging they're in Paris if they were in fact trying to be on the down low about filming. Then again, it could be a way of peeking interest. Then again, haha, I keep going back and forth. It would ruin things for so many if we knew for a fact that these characters, Rosita and Lydia will live on in the spinoff which means they survive the end of the series.

I would so like a solid Emily hint right now. To say she's on her way to Paris would be too much but just something that raises eyebrows. Is that too much to ask for? Apparently it is. I just think Emily has already been in Paris in those weeks where she disappeared but showed airport shots. That was roughly around the same time that Norman was filming Ride and I just think they might have filmed on the down low during that time and if people saw Norman with a film crew the assumption would be it was for Ride.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Agreed! I think she’s already done a lot of the filming as well. I hear ya about going back and forth.

@wdway:

Just saw on a TWD site that pops up on my Facebook feed the picture of Norman with the praying mantis on him he actually reposted it, it was originally posted in 2015. That's during Beth s5 right? Which makes me even more excited. Downside it means his arms could still be covered. But we cannot have everything in this lifetime.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Interesting! Yeah, true about the sleeves, but I like that it’s a repost from S5!  

XXX

So, long story short: Norman posted this last week. Our conjecture about him going back to no sleeves was, sadly, unjustified, because this was a repost from years ago.

However, I think it’s significant that he reposted something from S5, as well as the praying mantis itself, given the symbolism @wdway dug up. It was a conscious choice on his part to post this now while he’s filming.

So, just something I wanted to point out.

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

[toddtakefive]

HINATA IS ONE OF UR TOP FAVS TOO i love that hen will people love hinata More. am i js biased maybe people alr do love him a lot but BUT !!!!! i love hinata

He absolutely is!!!!

(This is gonna be kinda long, so excuse any spelling and/or grammar mistakes or any poor formatting because I’m on my phone and it’s 4:44am as I start writing)

I find Hinata’s character really interesting not only because of his natural ability and overall potential but because of the setbacks that present themselves so many times throughout his life and that, even in the face of those, he never backs down.

Hinata isn’t just short, something that is easily fixabel given his raw talent; He goes to a school with no boys volleyball team.

Hinata doesn’t just go to a school with no boys volleyball team; No one is willing to make one with him.

Hinata doesn’t just have a lack of understanding of the actual mechanics of the game; He has no one to teach him (And at this time it’s still 2011-2012, where they are seen using what are very much flip-phones and he likely has no access to things like google or youtube to look up tutorials).

Hinata wasn’t just a kid who loved volleyball; He was going to play no matter fucking what, and I ADORE that about his character.

From the beginning of the series, Hinata is driven. He has passion for what he plays, and he never shies away from expressing that passion even when he’s the only person around that has it. To him it doesn’t matter that he’s short, or that his school has no team, or that none of his friends care about volleyball because he does. He loves volleyball with everything that he is, and nothing can take that away from him.

Even when he loses the first - and only - match of his Junior High career he doesn’t back down. In fact, it only increases his passion ten fold. He sees someone he considers better, the pinnacle of what being a volleyball player is, and instead of being insecure or thinking he might as well stop playing, he takes it as a challenge and uses that rivalry that he then devotes the rest of his life (that we see) to because that’s just who he is. He doesn’t back down, he doesn’t tuck his tail between his legs, he charges forward without a second thought and never brakes.

Not only does he bring out the best in Kageyama- something I’ll get into when I inevitably make a post about him - but almost everyone that’s around him (with the exception of Tsukishima who, if I remember correctly, only gets his head out of his ass when Yamaguchi finally snaps at him). His love for the game absolutely rubs off on everyone around him, so much so that his Junior High friends joined the team only so he could play an official game. He’s the type of person that says they’re going to make it big, be a name that people know someday, and even if it sounds over the top you listen because they say it with so much belief and conviction you catch yourself believing them wholeheartedly.

Hinata makes goals, and he knows what he wants, and he dives for it and that is why I love his character. He isn’t just a good person, he’s an incredible athlete that never backed away at the face of adversity; If anything, I think it made him more eager to run out onto the court.

Anyways, yes, Hinata is definitely in my top favorite characters of the show and if I were on my computer this would probably be so much longer, lol <3

#haikyuu #hinata shoyo #character analysis #brainrot #asks #anon 🕶

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 292: You Say Jeans

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “well anyway here’s that Touya reveal I foreshadowed like a million years ago, viva la 2020.” Dabi was all “hello world, I’ve killed 30 people and today I’m going to explain to you all why” before he proceeded to explain ABSOLUTELY NOTHING but everyone was so distracted by his tale of child abuse and hero conspiracies that they didn’t much seem to notice. Can’t Ya See-Kun’s Shark Friend was all “IS THIS THE END OF HERO SOCIETY AS WE KNOW IT”, and Horikoshi was all “STAY TUNED”, and then Dabi set himself on fire and leaped off of Machia’s back like the chaotic evil, I-just-bleached-all-my-brain-cells weird little fire man he is, ready to burn everyone to crispy bits before they could even react properly to his whole big revenge speech. Fortunately he did not succeed on account of THE RETURN OF THE JING, THE JOAT, BEST FUCKING JEANIST, back from the dead by popular demand in what critics are calling “the best fucking comeback since Jesus himself.”

Today on BnHA: Best Jeanist snatches up Machia and the rest of the League with his fiber steel cables before you can say “more like BEAST JEANIST amirite.” Dabi gets all worked up and lights Hadou on fire which is a real JERK MOVE, and is all “THIS RIGHT HERE IS ALSO ENDEAVOR’S FAULT”, which, NOT SUPER CONVINCED ON THAT, BUT OKAY. Anyway so then he burns up all the cables holding him which is crazeballs btw, and then he and Shouto start fighting, and so basically the whole thing is a literal hot mess and we’ll see how that goes. Meanwhile Tomura wakes up and summons some Noumus, and poor Jeanist has to deal with those on top of the still-attempting-to-rampage Gigantomachia, and everyone else is all “we can’t help you on account of we’re all half dead”, and so it’s looking really bad. And then -- and I can’t stress enough how much I don’t even have the faintest idea how to segue into this next part -- the chapter ends with Mirio!?! just sort of POPPING UP OUT OF THE GROUND all, “SURPRISE, BITCH”, and it literally was so surprising that I am still just kind of speechless. WELL-PLAYED, I GUESS, lol wtf.

lol okay so the first page in the RHA scan is just the “three musketeers” movie promo image that we all already saw a few days ago. but it does confirm that (a) it is indeed a movie, and (b) that it’s set for a summer 2021 release! how exciting

okay so now back to our special Dabi edition of Making a Murderer

“ray of hope” oh hell yes. SAVE US MR. JEANIST

I guess he had a TV in his private hero jet or something?

gotta say, “dammit Dabi” does not even remotely sound like Authentic Best Jeanist Dialogue to me though. gonna need Caleb to see to this. well but what do you guys think? does Best Jeanist curse?? I personally feel like he’s one of those guys who NEVER EVER swears no matter what, except under the most hilariously trifling circumstances. like he’s eating an avocado one day and he accidentally stains the cuffs of his beloved jostume green and he’s all “FUCK”

btw how fucking rich is Best Jeanist though that he has his own fucking plane? the thought just suddenly occurred to me, you know? like even Endeavor, whose agency has its own on-site luxury apartment suites for all of his interns, still drives around in a dinky little car that Bakugou has declared to be too small. which, I guess we know why he felt that way now, seeing as the guy he previously interned with apparently gets around in Jeans Force One

anyway so back to the part where Jeanist shows up to save the day!! YEAH JEANIST WOOOOO

ILU JEANIST YOU REALLY ARE THE BEST!! HUGS AND KISSES!!!

lmao we just saw Gigantomachia take out like a hundred guys not ten chapters ago. and Best Jeanist shows up and takes him down in like two seconds. HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES LEAGUE OF VILLAINS. BET YOU’RE WISHING YOU’D TAKEN HIS QUIRK NOW, AFO. GET FUCKED YOU OLD SPUD

KACCHAN IS SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM AWW

SIDE NOTE, IIDA, YOU AND I ARE GONNA HAVE WORDS LATER ABOUT YOU ACTUALLY AGREEING TO PUT HIM BACK DOWN. YOU DO UNDERSTAND THAT THIS CHILD IS STILL DRIPPING BLOOD ALL OVER THE PLACE FROM HIS MULTIPLE STAB WOUNDS, RIGHT? WAY TO ASSERT YOUR AUTHORITY THERE. I THOUGHT YOU WERE THE CLASS PRESIDENT NOT THE CLASS CLOWN, COME ON NOW

LMAO DABI IS FRANTICALLY TRYING TO DO THE PLOT MATH

SHOULDA CHECKED MORE CLOSELY MY GOOD MARK. LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED THE “MADE IN CHINA” STICKER ON THE BOTTOM. YOU HAVE BEEN BAMBOOZLED. OR ACTUALLY, I GUESS THE MORE ACCURATE WORD HERE IS JAMBOOZLED, AHAHAHAHA. JEANS

HOLY SHIT DABI

I legit almost thought that was Tomura for a second. you two look so alike now with the white hair and the crazy eyes

meanwhile, Shouto is still crying and it’s a lot to take, you guys. lotta feels

ffff come on Jeanist you better do something awesome again here, the mood of the chapter is starting to slip now

YES, GOOD, THAT’LL WORK

WELL YOU TELL ME, SPINNER. I GUESS THAT MEANS BEST JEANIST IS OFFICIALLY THE STRONGEST CHARACTER IN THE SERIES NOW. SORRY I DON’T MAKE THE RULES

ffff now Spinner is trying to wake Tomura back up. nah, how’s about we not do that

OH MY GOD HADOU YESSSS

MY GIRL OUT HERE WITH THE “NO THANK YOU” BOUT TO CURBSTOMP THE BIG BAD WITH HER QUIRK KSFHLKLK WHO HERE HAD “HADOU SAVES THE DAY” ON YOUR WAR ARC BINGO CARDS, YOU LOVE TO SEE IT!!

HEY!!!!

fucking son of a... fffkfkff... someone please reassure me that fire isn’t Hadou’s weakness. someone. anyone. also could someone please dial an ambulance and send them to Horikoshi’s house. but not just yet. first I’m gonna need you to wait about fifteen minutes or so while I take care of some things

well all right then, Dabi. so you wanna go on then and explain to us all how this, too, is somehow Endeavor’s fault?

oh I see, you’ve decided that since he’s responsible for “creating” you, everyone you hurt and kill is in truth really being hurt and killed by him! well now, that sure is convenient as fuck I guess

(ETA: that’s a nice effect with the panel sides getting all warped by Dabi’s quirk though, just noticed that.)

amazing how quickly you used up that sympathy card my guy. Shouto please kick his ass, I’m fucking done lol, you can all sort out the rest in therapy later

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE DIAL BACK DEKU’S EMPATHY STATS JUST A LITTLE BIT, HOLY --

“TODOROKI-KUN IS HURT THE MOST”, HE SAYS, WITH HIS ARM BONES SHATTERED INTO LITTLE TOOTHPICK-SIZED PIECES. I MEAN, HE’S PROBABLY TALKING MORE ABOUT MENTAL ANGUISH GIVEN THE CONTEXT HERE, BUT STILL. THAT’S ENOUGH HEROICS FROM YOU ALREADY FOR ONE DAY

NOOO JEANIST

LOTS OF SMOKE IN THE AIR RIGHT ABOUT NOW AND MY BOY’S STILL DOWN A LUNG. GOD DAMMIT

“if the number one suffers a total loss here, this country will fall to pieces” well okay, real talk though, I think the “country falling to pieces” part is pretty much unavoidable at this juncture. you all are just gonna have to try your best to pick up those pieces after the fact and see what you can do with them. if I were you I’d be less worried about the number one’s reputation and more concerned with the half-dozen child soldier interns who are still on the field and very much at risk of being burned to death should you suffer that “total loss.” please try to keep it together here for them

OH FOR FUCK’S

I really thought RockLockRock was gonna come into play here. USE YOUR QUIRK TO LOCK THE ROPES IN PLACE YOU DIP!! if he seriously just sits there and does nothing when his quirk could be the deciding factor I am cancelling his useless ass cute kid or no cute kid shfkjdls

(ETA: is he even there?? did he and Manual just hightail it out of there?? “well good luck, children.”)

also, we’ll put this aside for now to perhaps speculate about later, but what’s with Tomura remembering his dad’s house yet again in that far right panel?? and being itchy again?? I still have yet to fully work out the psychological mechanisms at work as far as his itchiness goes, so I’ll admit this is intriguing to me. it seemed like it was connected to his decay quirk, but then why is it acting up again now. what is this lol

yuh oh

forgot about these guys. looks like these heroes aren’t having such a fun time

oh fucksticks

excuse me ma’am but I don’t like this. you do know that my kids are all there, right. all burnt and impaled and broken-boned and the like. well except for Iida. he’s fine still. BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN I FEEL LIKE WATCHING HIM GET TORN APART BY FOUR HIGH ENDS, WTF

HORIKOSHI YOU MOTHERFUCKER I SWEAR TO GOD

god fucking... okay look. Horikoshi. you win, okay!? congratulations, you win, this is your show and we’re all just sitting here at your mercy. fine. go ahead and just kill off everyone ever, then!! what am I even gonna do about it. stop reading?? fuck

this whole thing really went from zero to fucked before I could even blink huh. I really thought this was gonna be a turning point chapter for the heroes. shows what I know I guess??

meanwhile this motherfucker is just SCREAMING

ngl, if I wasn’t currently terrified on account of things suddenly taking such a drastic turn for the worse, this would be the coolest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Jeanist my man, I hype you up like it’s my job because you are the greatest fucking meme character in the history of time, but make no mistake, you are also highkey WORTH ALL THE HYPE AND THEN SOME

seriously, though. don’t fucking mind him you guys, he’s just standing here in the coolest pose of all time taking on Gigantomachia all alone with one fucking lung because the substance pumping through his veins is COLD-BLOODED LIQUID DENIM, and DENIM FEELS NO FEAR

Best Jeanist really needs to get his own theme song. -- oh my god I just finally thought of a title for this post. lmao and it’s the dumbest thing. omg

MEANWHILE THE TODOROKI BROS ARE OFF IN THEIR OWN DRAMATIC LITTLE FIRE WORLD

which one do you think is the Mario and which is the Luigi. well, but I mean, Dabi clearly thinks that he’s the Luigi though and that’s why he’s so mad. nobody wants to be Luigi. what a life

THAT’S IT, SHOUTO!! POINT OUT ALL OF HIS HYPOCRITICAL BULLSHIT, I WANT ANSWERS

JUST TO CLARIFY, IT’S THAT NATSU, NOT SOME OTHER NATSU!! SO WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF!!

OH, WELL IN THAT CASE

BUT OF COURSE. THAT WOULD MAKE IT ALL WORTHWHILE, holy shit. okay I’m just gonna go ahead and say it, Dabi is a piece of work. I really thought this arc would make him more sympathetic at long last, but it seems like it’s doing just the opposite?? this is like an anti-redemption arc. I don’t relish the thought of venturing into the fandom tags once I finish reading this lol

(ETA: well folks, I’ve done it. and actually it was pretty interesting because there are apparently like ten different things that people are mad about, and so it’s like. each post is a new adventure lmao.)

so Shouto is all “BRUH HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST IT” and Dabi is all “YES”, basically? like, he says he’s completely lost his feeling for anything. omg. but you were so sweet. how does that even happen

“finally I can kill you” okay for real what the heck is your damage bro?? can we not. I like Shouto just the way he is, un-killed

oh shit and now the Noumus are here

cue Bakugou diving in to save his mentor, STAB WOUNDS BE DAMNED!! actually it would make more sense for it to be Iida, but if Kacchan is really fixin’ to go full Shounen Dumbass here then he might as well go all out, y’know

-- unless of course, Deku decides to activate another quirk??

“last I checked, the main character of this series was still me” OH? WELL I SUPPOSE THAT IS TRUE, SO PRAY TELL, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT LEFT UP YOUR SLEEVE YOU SUICIDAL BRUSSELS SPROUT

fucking love how he’s all “HAHAHA WITH MY NEW QUIRKS I CAN STILL DO STUPID SHIT EVEN WITH MY ARMS AND LEGS GROUND TO A FINE POWDER” btw. what can I say. Deku gonna Deku

FMMFHDKUHK W H A T

HOLY SHIT. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. WHAT THE WHAT. QUE THE FUCK

(ETA: okay look, all the love in the world to the brave scanlators who take time out of their lives to translate the leaks every week just so we can read the chapter a couple of days early like the addicts we are. that said, translating Mirio’s signature “POWER!!” -- which was already written in English in the original scan -- to “POG-CHAMP” is just a whole new level of wtfuckery from them lmao. is the Lida person back at it again?? amazing.)

MIRIO!?!?! SHOWS UP TO SAVE THE DAY?!?! POGS HIMSELF UP OUT THE GROUND TO BEAT THE NOUMUS LIKE IT AIN’T NO THING. JUST LIKE WE ALL PREDICTED!? I’M SORRY, DID YOU NOT SEE THAT COMING?? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME YOUR DAILY HOROSCOPE FROM ASTROLOGY DOT COM DIDN’T HAVE THAT ONE IN THE CARDS?? WAS IT NOT OBVIOUS?? TODOROKIS PLUS BEST JEANIST EQUALS MIRIO??

hot damn. Tintin really saw the writing on the wall with the impending Dabi Discourse and was all “NOT SO FAST” lmao. “HERE’S A BRAND NEW THING FOR YOU ALL TO DISCOURSE ABOUT” MIRIO YOU WILD CHILD. YOU GLORIOUS THUG

MEANWHILE LET’S NOT FORGET WHAT MIRIO HAVING HIS POWERS BACK ACTUALLY IMPLIES. HOLY SHIT. SUDDENLY WE CUT BACK TO ALL MIGHT’S OFFICE, ALL THE WAY BACK AT UA. ERI BRANDISHES HER TOKOYAMI-GIFTED BUSTER SWORD, A DETERMINED GLEAM IN HER EYE. “I HEARD YOU WERE TRYING TO HAVE A GIRL POWER ARC WITHOUT ME.” OH. MY. GOD

#bnha 292 #best jeanist #todoroki touya #dabi #todoroki shouto #midoriya izuku #hadou nejire #toogata mirio #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

[goodguydotmp3]

two questions: why don’t you like harry and do you really think harry villanized the weed video or do you think that was the people attempting to court him (azoffs)

Whew, this is a long one folx!

Why don’t you like Harry [Styles]?

Let me preface this response by saying that I’m a pretty new “fan” if one can still call me that. I got into the One Direction fandom in the summer of last year, and much of my opinions of the boys where shaped by fan reactions. After gathering more and more information however, I realized that the fandom and I were wrong about some things, and over hyping others. 

Still, it wasn’t until this year that I actually broke out of the Harry-centric bubble to realize that the shady goings on where much worse than I originally thought. Add to this my realization that Harry’s music really doesn’t withstand the test of time, and that his persona is pretty Stagnant, and I’ve come to feel rather bamboozled.

Of course I know that the entire point of his PR team is to sway public opinion of him one way, and if I ate it up that was part of the plan. That doesn’t mean I have to like it. It also doesn’t mean I feel any less hurt about it. It also doesn’t mean that I like when other people fawn over him, as quite a lot of what I’m going to say has been public knowledge, and some of it before I was even a fan.

A. Music

 Actually getting to a big part of the problem here, his music isn’t good. Well, not long term like I said in the preface. He doesn’t really have much of a vocal range despite being a singer for more than ten years. He does not care and acts like he does, often leading to him sounding like he’s screaming instead of singing. He’s lyrics are boring and flat, and his melodies are fine, they just don’t make up for his unmemorable lyrics. I personally think that the cause is him more heavily relying on song writers to fill in more in more, but that’s mostly because I don’t want to believe that the same person who wrote Happily and Olivia also wrote At the Dining Table and Treat People With Kindness, because that would just mean he’s getting worse or putting forth less effort. 

Of course one could argue that I’m not a professional, I don’t have the necessary Jargon to correctly critique, and I’m no longer a singer so I can’t even do what he does. But to that I say fuck off. I know what sounds good! I know what I like! 

Even more than that though, If you bought a product (non food), and you could only use that product for the first two weeks you bought it, you’d say it was a shit product! You’d scream from the rooftops that no one should ever buy this product because it’s crap! Well guess what? I pre-ordered Fine Line just to listen for two weeks and never pick it up again except for golden, she’s a funky tune every couple months. 

Besides the test of time, there is still the subject of actual talent/listenability if you will. I feel there’s four main categories when I listen to music that makes it worth listening to

1.Amazing voice

2.Awesome lyrics

3.Funky/ cool ass melody/Beat

4.Catchy as hell

Now, a song doesn’t need to be all four, however the more they have the more likely I am to like the song. Also, I’ve said “main categories” because I’ve definitely had songs were I just through the beat drop was cool, or maybe the bridge was sick as hell, or maybe I just liked the pacing or the way the singer/singers stressed a note. Alternatively there is a sweet spot for me of super depressing lyrics but a melody/ that makes you want to dance. See: most of After Laughter by Paramore, Lola By Mika. But in general, those four usually make me love a song long term.

If it’s an album, it usually Just has to sound like it belongs on the same album/ tell a story. Like I really don’t like albums that sound like it’s just a playlist of songs personally. I should be able to listen to a song and go “oh yeah, that’s off --- album” or I didn’t like the album as a whole. An album is a bit like an outfit to me. It’s not going to be all tops, nor does it need to be monochromatic, but it does need to go together

For Example, I love Four as an album. I thought it was amazing. I still hate Spaces and Illusion. I hate both of their melodies, I don’t like the Illusion intro, I’m not to keen on those lyrics, and they’re definitely not catchy, I skip every time. 

So taking that logic to Harry’s music, I think HS1 works very well as an album, almost all of the songs sound like they’re supposed to be there. And I hate every song but Kiwi. The lyrics are boring/don’t make a ton of sense, the melodies definitely don’t make up for that, he doesn’t have the range, and none of them are catchy! And then you get to Kiwi and she’s got that vibe you know? She’s a pop punk bop and I cannot fucking believe that Harry has one pop punk bop among unmemorable pop rock album.

Going to Fine line, It’s not as great as an album. There are some songs that don’t really feel like they fit? Like just going through the album, cherry doesn’t have any business being there? Like the lyrics fit sure, but what is that weird intro and outro? It probably would have been fine If the song didn’t have those two, but having them there upset the pace a bit I felt. And then there was Treat People With Kindness, which was really Jarring and doesn’t feel like it belongs on the album at all? It  actually feels like it’s trying to be Kiwi - it’s loud and garish, and the lyrics are trying to be carefree, but! It just doesn’t work! TPWK sounds like Hippie music! Kiwi sounds like Brendon Urie could sing it and people would be like “good ol Panic!”. And then the album goes back down into Fine line the song, which again is Jarring because you’ve had this TPWK monstrosity right before it.

Then, looking at the overarching theme of his music, It’s whiny piss baby music He hates to take responsibility for his actions! It’s all in his lyrics! And don’t get me wrong, I love Honest lyrics, but not if the person is an asshole! LIke I fucking hate confessions by Usher specifically becasue he’s talking about how much he’s a piece of shit in the most whiny and piss baby way, making it all about him and no the people he hurt. I also really hate that one song that Zayn did with Usher and Chris Brown, because you have these awful men completely misunderstanding what it means to write a love song, and then you have Zayn at the very end all like “actually I really am in love tho…” Esp Chris browns verse! It boils down to “Hey I know I was a asshole seven billion times but I miss you tho :(“ GIRL BYE! 

Harry sounds the exact same though, Except he can’t even blame himself for his own mistakes, and just wades through self pity about how the object of his affection won’t love him even though he didn’t even do anything except it wasn’t his fault and why are you still mad it wasn’t even his fault and he was young and reckless and drunk and horny. Like??? WRITE A NEW SONG TAYLOR SWIFT 2.0! There’s only so much you can repackage the same narrative before it becomes stale no Cinderella does not count keep that shit coming. And It really jumps out in his writing, even through 1d, although I will say there were some catchy beats, and awesome lines to keep him afloat back then. Although wtf was Walking in the Wind??? Choke!

Then there are the melodies I’m talking post wondee here which often give this 70’s pop rock vibe. Which fine I guess, it’s his brand, but that doesn’t make it interesting. Or new. Or fresh. Or an interesting take. 

Now I completely understand relying on nostalgia to boost people’s opinion, but you could at leas have the decency to actually have good music. For Example, Miss you by Louis Tomlinson has a very distinctive pop rock feel, but it’s also an amazing song. Great lyrics, amazing voice, catchy liddle diddy that happens to be reminiscent of that 2005- 2010 punk pop/emo pop feel. Sour diesel has that like,,,basey 90s pop feel, and it fucking works with the lyrics, and of course his voice is beautiful. When Walls dropped and Lou put out that playlist of songs that were an inspiration, you can hear the influences when you listen to the album, but they’re also really good songs in their own right, with amazing lyrics, and Louis’ distinctive voice. Comparing that to Harry, it seems like he’s mostly relying on people’s nostalgia rather than actually good music.

Okay so this last point I’m making on music is a little petty but it’s been like a week and I’m still pissed about it so I’m saying it now. Someone said that Harry Styles is the best pop rock artist right now???? Just admit that you don’t listen to pop rock tf. Louis Tomlinson is right there. Brendon Urie is right there. Mika is right there. Haley Williams is right there. Janell Monae is right there. I don’t listen to a lot of pop rock lol but i feel my point has been made

B. Public Persona

He get’s so much clout! SO MUCH CLOUT! For doing the bare minimum (this is not specifically about the fandom, that’s for later)! People will write all these glowing reviews of him for him??? Being polite??? Like okay and? Just because a person is polite doesn’t mean they’re fucking Jesus??? There’s a million and one stories so i’m not fucking looking them up but there’s the pizza story and the fish story and the plane story and the snl story and the Stormzy story and the WS story on and on and on! Stop giving this man brownie points for basic human decency. “I didn’t expect him to be like that!” okay is that because of their perception of what a rock star is supposed to be like? Because in that case we need to start holding people accountable for being assholes. Or is it because he seems like an asshole. Cause valid.

I also don’t like him leaning so heavily on the queer image thing. Like! If that’s how he likes to express himself, Fine, But so much of it is just...so manufactured! And I Know I’ve heard people say oh well he wore the one rainbow on his lapel that one time or he wore the shirt or he wore the Keith Harring.

1. That Rainbow pin is sus as hell I don’t care what ya’ll say It absolutely screams set up, if he wanted to not be seen he would have not been seen 

2. That goes for literally every other time. I can’t believe it’s not a set up to push a queer image. (that he profits from!)

3. If he actually did his homework on Keith Harring he’d know that the man was a predator, and he wouldn’t have worn those shirts. It seems so performative! To add to that, does he know now? If so, why isn’t he using his platform to correct his mistake? Why didn’t he come out and let people know not to buy Harring’s stuff??? He knows the pull he has! He absolutely could have been like “I’ve made a mistake, if you are looking for queer artists to support, here’s some” But he fucking doesn’t

4. To add on to that last part, It is actually sus that he gets to profit off of this queer image, and yet the only queer voices that he’s propping up are white gays. And then not even directly? Not a “queer artists, esp queer artists of color are important and need their voices boosted because they are the back bone of society” but this wink nod type of deal, where again, he mainly boosts white gays.like??? One queer black woman that doesn’t work for the Azoffs, and then a bunch of white gays. Like?? That’s not racist to anyone else???????Just me? okay.

Now from a professional point of view, it’s even worse. I’m not saying that artists can’t be campy or blurr gender lines, or imply that they ‘re queer subtly. But I think it’s fucking disrespectful to play both ends. Like, he profits off of using the queer image, all while Dancing around the subject, but then on the back end he never says that Homophobes/Transphobes aren’t allowed in his fandom. He gives this empty ass tpwk and then washes his hands of it. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am always upset when people who have lots of queerphobes in their fandom bullying and harassing the actual queer people never say anything to let queerphobes know they’re unwelcome (clearly money is better than morals) but for me it’s an extra kick to the gut for it to literally profit Harry to seem queer. Look at that time that  gay company sold out shirts in less than an hour,because harry was wearing it and tell me people aren’t throwing money at him because they feel he’s queer. 

C. Fashion

This one is a really rough one for me because this is partially what drew me into Harry in the first place. But he’s really not all that in terms of fashion. He’s expensive certainly, but sometimes, the things that are more expensive are worse. Even When He’s not looking like a grandparent out on the town, his style is very dated, and yet he gets paraded around like he’s the freshest new thing?? Like who is his team paying of for him to get that many articles about how he’s fashion’s biggest star. And the thing is, his style is even dated for the mainstream. There’s already a post about how he copies prominent pop/pop rock stars of the 70s, which means that his style is 50 years old for the mainstream. Now don’t get me wrong, I think it’s totally fine if you’re addicted to seventies wear. I don’t think he should be heralded as this huge fashion star if his wardrobe is this dated

Even more than that. Gucci???? The Gucci with a history of Racism?? The Gucci with the child labor??? The Gucci with the 14 hour days Gucci??? Ugly ass Gucci????? Soulja Boy don’t even fuck with Gucci no more and he fuck with Gucci since like 2007. (although that was because of the racism, not cause it’s ugly)

I think that bothers me the most though. Like it’s not enough to exploit people, you also have to be tacky ugly and expensive???? For what??? @Gucci cease to exist please.

If Harry wants to be tacky ugly and expensive, that’s of course his rights to do so! But don’t act like he’s at the very pinnacle of fashion every time he does. 

I’m actually always very conflicted about that. I personally prefer a style that’s very loud and campy and avant garde but like,,,,that ain’t it. Maybe it’s something you got it or ya don’t??? Like for example Billy Porter could wear a trashbag and make it work. The expensive sweaters and the slacks? The suits? Not a good look on one Harry Styles. Maybe it’s because they’re expensive sweaters and slacks and expensive suits. What are you, Ted from accounting??? Grow up.

D. Treat People With Kindness

Ugh this is the thing that pisses me off like the second to most. This phrase is so fucking empty. You could not have made up a more corporate mandated phrase if you fucking tried. It stands for nothing! Just like him!

Let’s break it down. “Treat people with kindness” is, at face value, a call to action. It’s asking you to do something. But it doesn’t actually tell you what to do!! So it’s pretty inoffensive! You don’t actually have to change your behavior in anyway for two main reasons:

1. What the hell is Kindness??? This phrase never actually says what it is??? It’s just this short little punchy thing that assumes you know what kindness is! What if you didn’t actually know? What if you have differing ideals of what is considered kindness? I mean to my mother, Misgendering me is kindness, but I don’t think that’s kindness. To my father, not letting his children have autonomy is kindness, but I don’t find that kind. And yet they could both use that phrase and feel confident that they go around treating people with kindness. After all they cooked dinner didn’t they? They smiled at Janice from public relations didn’t they? That’s kindness right?

2. It also assumes you know what “people” are. Queer people are people. Queerphobes don’t consider queer people, people. Racists aren’t going to consider some people, people. So they can continue their harassment and dehumanization of them and still be treating people with kindness, because they never harmed actual people (to them)

E. Harry bots

Bitch?? Corporate spies?? Tf ??? That’s not weird to ya’ll ?? I think the thing that shocked me more than someone from Colombia records admitting that he manufactures the hype around people signed to Colombia, is the fact that the Fandom been knew!!!! Ya’ll been knew and ya’ll wasn’t gon tell me???????? I just found out last week wtf????????

Another thing I don’t like about them Harry bots, is it’s one thing to hype up Harry, but why tf do they need to shit on the other boys??? Is it because they’re more talented, good looking, and charming??? How about you get good!!!! I esp hate that it’s usually Louis. What is Corporate’s obsession with putting Louis down like? What a bunch of fucking weirdos?? It’s not enough to be a Harry fan and live up his ass, I gotta hate Louis too?? You lost yo damn mind. If you reading this and you a spy? Die.

F. Capitalism

Honestly that should be the end of it but here the fuck we go I guess. Now I get that there is going to be some capitalism involved when you get music, especially mainstream music, there are tones of articles out there with people who used to be in the industry telling you about how fucking awful it is, all in the pursuit of money. (Which isn’t fucking real by the way! We made it up! People out here getting traumatized! Belittled! Bullied! Married off! So some corporation can make all the money! The Imaginary Credits! That we made up! I hate it here!) 

But it’s another fucking thing to participate in a capitalist system? He invested into that one sleep app, even going to do one of the voice sessions (So you could have Harry Styles themed sleep paralysis) and you pay for that! He makes money off that! It’s not enough that you buy his mediocre music or his ugly ass merch, you also have to give him money through the sleep paralysis app. 

Then there was that Google Camp for Rich People Only! I don’t even want to fucking hear that it was on Climate Change oh wow all the rich people took helicopters and Yachts to a resort with manicured lawns??? To talk about how they treat the environment? That’s not at all Counter intuitive! Not at all for show! Fucking disgusting.

Oh and the Covid Shirt! Really bitch??? You need to Profit off a deadly pandemic? Are you profiting off of AIDS next you fucking bastard. And he can of course get a tax write of for his “ charitable donation” fuck off.

G. Racism

This! This is the thing that gets me the most! YA’LL CAN EXCUSE RACISM???

No, I’m not talking about the Native American Headdress thing, that was plenty despicable on it’s own, No I’m talking about the on going racism. The whole, using black people for clout and then dropping them and never returning the favor when they sing his praises thing. Specifically I’m thinking of Sis the activist, Stormzy, and Lizzo. 

The Lizzo thing pisses me off the most actually. I think it’s very fucking convenient that Harry started taking interest in Lizzo after there was uproar from black fans noting his hypocrisy of performing for Pepsi (Notoriously racist) and Having BLM sticker on his guitar. So he shows up at one of her concerts dressed like a senior citizen that got lost on the way to the retirement home bathroom. She looked fucking amazing and he couldn’t put forth the effort to at least not look senile. Then there was the covering of her songs, and then there was the cuddling up with her at the awards show. Funny how I haven’t seen any interaction after the fact! And Of course everyone forgot about the Pepsi concert! Fuck all the way off!!

Also! Are we just never going to talk about the fact that he didn’t comment on the blm protests earlier this year until his team could gauge whether or not it would be profitable to do so by DATA MINING HIS FAN BASE???? And then when he actually did he got the most praise for it, truly fucking hate it here. Also when he marched with those protesters he made sure we knew it was him. There were posts flouting around everywhere on how to best cover up to make yourself completely unrecognizable should you wind up on camera or fucking worse, get attacked by the police. Funny how Close Sprouse could follow the advice and not Harry? Also supper funny how he got the hell out of dodge before things got super bad and I have not heard anything on the matter since. Guess what Harry??? We’re still out here fighting for the rights to exist! Still wanna have a photo op while our own government tries to squash us with force????? This is like that Jenner Pepsi ad but with sunglasses and a pandemic.

H. Fandom

I think I would hate him less if I didn’t have to hear about him every hour of everyday. Stop Hyping this man so much. Even after unfollowing and blocking a bunch of Harries and Larries he’s all across my dash. And twitter. And insta. KURTIS CONNER FUCKING LIKES HIM I JUST WANTED CRACK CONTENT AND NOW LOOK. 

I. Conclusion.

After writing all this I think the running theme is that Harry Styles isn’t even a person, he’s a brand. I do not like or trust brands! And I definitely don’t like being advertised to! Just like It’s fake as fuck when Absolut is all about queer rights, it’s fake as fuck when Harry does it too. Just like I know Target doesn’t actually care about Black lives, I know Harry doesn’t either. People are always like “oh he’s so nice!” no! He’s polite! There’s a difference. Zayn Is a truly kind person. Liam is a truly kind person. Louis is a truly kind person. It shines though so brightly all the time, and yet people are really out here worshiping the Brand Harry Styles. 

Do I think It was Harry or The Azoffs throwing Zouis under the bus. 

Truly doesn’t matter! Whichever one did it, Harry was totally fine with it! Which tells me that he doesn’t give a shit about anyone but himself. He’ll go along with anything as long as it gets him to the top, and that’s fucked up on one million and one levels

#hazza curly mchazzerson #This is like 4 thousand words #Have fun #Harry Styles

[jawritter]

Twelve Days Of Christmas

Chapter 9

Summary: Dean never realized that Y/N missed Christmas until he turned off an annoying Christmas song on the radio on the way home from a hunt, now he will make it his personal mission to give her the Christmas he misses so much, and if he plays his cards right, maybe he will give her what he has wanted to give her for so many years, himself.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Written For: @spnchristmasbingo​​​​​​​​

Square Field: Sledding

Word Count: 1334

Warnings: Fluff, mild language, brief mention of John’s A+ parenting.

A/N: This is to help me catch up on my SPN Christmas Bingo card lol Chapter 10 will post tomorrow! I knew chapter will post every day until Christmas! I know I’m insane lol. This is a real time fic collection and all mistakes will be my own! Please do not copy my work! Hope you all enjoy these!!

**SERIES MASTERLIST** **MASTERLIST**   **BECOME A PATREON**

You stood at the top of the snow-covered hill, flat sled in hand, and watched as two teenagers boarded the sled next to you, sliding down without hesitation. 

The hill was higher than you expected. Normally heights didn't bother you. You'd flown plenty of times in your life. You'd even done a little rock climbing. This seemed very high. Maybe it was the sun glaring off of the snow that made it feel higher than what it actually was? 

Dean's hand came down heavily on your shoulder, and you turned to see his emerald green eyes staring down at you. His freckled face was slightly red from the cold.

"Ready Sweetheart?"

You gave him a short nod and dropped the sled to the ground. You were a hunter for fucks sake. You weren't about to let a little snowy hill be your demise. 

Once you had dropped yourself into place on the sled, Dean dropped down behind you; wrapping his arms securely around your waist.

A swarm of butterflies was set free in your stomach at the feel of his solid body behind your own, even threw the jackets and things you were wearing to stave off the cold. 

It didn't take much of a shove from either of you to get the sled moving. Dean's laugh pierced the air behind you, and you never wanted it to stop. It was the simple things about him that made you the happiest. Like the deep laugh, you rarely got to hear on a normal basis. 

"Come on, let's go again," he said, getting to his feet before helping you to your own before grabbing the sled. 

There was an almost childlike excitement on his face. There was no way you could have said no to him.

This was the first time Dean had ever been sledding, and as you prepared to go down again, you could see just how much Dean had been robbed as a child. 

John never bothered to take the kids sledding, or do any other fun activities with them. It was always his work, his obsession. It wasn't fair to them then, and it wasn't for now. It made Dean hard and turned him into the little grunt, the soldier, John's perfect little punching bag. 

You lost count of how many times the two of you had gone up and down that hill. When you were both finally so tired and cold you were both shivering, Dean decided to call it a day, but you had more fun than you could remember having in a very long time.

"I know it's late afternoon," Dean said as he climbed into Baby's warm interior. "But I could really go for some breakfast for supper." 

"Oh man, that sounds amazing," you agree, smiling at him as he pulled onto the main road and headed towards the little Waffle House that was just about three miles from the cabin the two of you were staying at.

Once you were both inside the warm restaurant, a cup of steaming coffee in hand, and your orders placed, you looked over at Dean who was looking through his text messages as he waited on his food. 

He looked ten years younger than he did when the two of you got here a few days ago. He was more relaxed, almost like a huge weight had been pulled off of his shoulders. It was the first time you could ever remember Dean being this at ease. You didn't want to go back to life once Christmas was over. You wanted him to have this all of the time, not just for a few days out of the year. 

"Sammy and Eileen are going to take a few days to get her moved into the bunker before we get back," he said, putting his phone away into his pocket, and reaching for your hand across the small table. "So when we get back we will have more people living with us again. It's been too quiet around there lately, it will be a nice change."

"So you're okay with a couple of newlyweds hanging around after they tie the knot, being disgustingly cute all over the place?"

Dean laughed in spite of himself, his thumb making little random patterns on the back of your hand. 

"Well, we will just have to be as annoyingly cute. Give ‘em a run for their money,” he said with a wink. 

A deep blush crept its way up your neck and all the way to the tips of your ears. So there was hope of him still being this close to you after you got home to the bunker? 

"I love it when you do that ya know?" 

"When I do what?" you asked him.

"Blush, it's adorable." 

Well damn if that didn't make it worse, and you hid your face in the bend of your arm. Dean reached across the table pulling your arm away from your face. 

"Don't hide from me pretty girl." 

Before you could respond the waitress appeared with your food, and Dean's eyes lit up like a child on Christmas morning as his pile of food that appeared in front of him. 

"So, day 6, what did you think?" he asks, mouth stuffed full of waffles, looking more adorable than a grown man ever had a right to.

"I loved it, it's been years since I'd been sledding."

Dean smiled into his coffee as his eyes stayed trained on yours. 

"Good, cause I was a little afraid by now you would be ready to get rid of me," Dean said, eyes still locked on yours. 

"What! Hell no! In fact, I don't want to leave!"

The confession slipped out before you could stop yourself. To your surprise, Dean looked relieved. 

"You know," Dean said, shifting nervously in his seat. "This doesn't have to end when we go home. I mean, we can still, ya know, spend time together."

The shock must have shown on your face, because Dean scrambled for his words as he reached around the food that was still sitting in front of the two of you, grabbing your hand in his. 

"I mean, that's only if you still want to spend time with me. If you haven't noticed, I really, really like you Y/N."

Your mind was reeling. Sure, Dean had kissed you, a lot by now, but you had refused to look too far into it because Dean Winchester, "doesn't do relationships." You were inadvertently trying to protect yourself from impending heartbreak, and you hadn't even realized that until now. 

"Dean, I thought you said...I thought l…" 

Words failed you, but Dean seemed to catch on to where you were going. 

"I know, I said I don't do relationships, but baby things have changed. Chucks gone, Jacks in charge, things are as they should be. I don't have a big target hanging over my head anymore. Being with me isn't a death sentence anymore." 

You swallowed hard, your heart was hammering against your rib cage like a jackhammer. 

You had always dreamed Dean would notice you, would want to be with you, but you would never let yourself hope it would ever happen. 

"Baby, say something, please."

You blinked hard and nodded your head. "I would love that Dean, but only if you're sure you want this."

Dean smiled widely, leaning across the small table and capturing your lips in a sweet kiss that had your toes curling in your boots. 

You could almost feel the shift in things between you and Dean, like a promise, or a bond that was formed. It was something you could cling to, almost tangible. As real as Dean's hand that was laced in yours as he made his way back to your little side of Heaven for the night. 

He had always had your heart, but knowing you had his? That was the best Christmas present you could ever get and by far the most precious.

Forever Tags: 

@deandreamernp​

@forgetthisbull​

@miraclesoflove​

@deanwanddamons​​​ 

@rvgrsbrns​​ 

@chevyharvelle​​ 

@onethirstyunicorn​​ 

@i-love-superhero​​ 

@lyss-dw79​ 

@magssteenkamp​ 

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Jensen and Dean’s Babes

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Series Tag List: 

@440mxs-wife​

#dean winchester #spnchristmasbingo #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester series #dean x reader #dean x you #dean series #spn fanfiction #spn fanfic #spn series #jawritter #twelve days of christmas #jensen ackles

[bluejayblueskies]

Your HK au post is so well thought out and I love it but as someone who has seen many hours of HK clips on Youtube, I am curious which cast members you can see making the most iconic mistakes. Who overcooks like a dozen wellingtons in one service? Who overcooks and throws away about 5lbs of pasta? Whose signature dish makes Elias physically sick even though they insist customers always love it? Etc.

oh i'm glad you like it!!! in no particular order:

- any time jude is put on the meat station, she burns the lamb. it's like a curse. she tries to make lamb for a challenge once before she gets sent home in an effort to redeem herself but she burns that one too. the night she gets sent home she burns three lambs in a row and elias sits her down and forces her to eat her burnt lamb at the chef's table.

- on the flip side, jane gets put on meat her first service and only puts out raw meat. she's like 'it's not raw it's rare!' and elias is like 'the fat isn't rendered and it's cold what do you mean it's not raw???' (she puts out raw chicken two times in a row and elias almost loses his mind)

- martin. i love martin. but his signature dish does not go over well at all. elias takes one look and is like 'this looks like you upended a trash can on this plate and sprinkled some chives on top of it. what is it supposed to be?' and then he eats it and spits it out almost instantaneously. martin's so nervous, all he can think to say is, 'it's something i serve all the time, people love it!' and elias is like 'remind me never to come to your general area of the country. zero points. next'

- poor gerry. the man just cannot cook scallops to save his life. elias is like 'they're rubber do them again!' and then gerry tries again and this time they're stone cold. the next time they stick to the pan. gerry gets kicked out of the kitchen, goes back to the dorms, and sits on the couch with his head in his hands like fuck.

- jon has mostly good services. but. his big mistake comes somewhere near black jackets when he gets up in his head about things. he slices a wellington, is like 'shit this is over' and is so afraid to bring up overcooked wellington or admit to it that he just... throws it away. he does this for two more before elias gets impatient and goes over and is like 'what are you doing??' and pulls perfectly cooked wellingtons out of the trash and is like 'these are perfectly cooked!! why are we throwing away perfectly cooked food!! you're better than this jon' and jon is convinced he's going to get kicked out even though it's his first real mistake in service.

- jared is the person who doesn't communicate at all. he either says absolutely nothing or gives conflicting answers ('two minutes on the fish' [one minute later] 'three minutes on the fish chef!') and likes to blame his communication mistakes on other people, saying that they didn't talk to him.

- mike puts up a lot of undercooked risotto (like... consistently) and eventually it gets to the point where he's put on apps and his teammate is like 'dude just- just let me do the risotto please' and in the cut-away interview portion, mike is like 'what the fuck dude, i know how to cook a goddamned risotto, get off my back' when clearly he doesn't lol

- tim has no palate. he does very poorly at all the 'taste it now make it' or palate challenges. elias gives him banana to taste and he guesses carrots. he gives him chicken and tim guesses egg whites. it's awful.

- manuela does the classic 'i didn't realize the stove/oven wasn't on!' not once, but twice in her time in hell's kitchen. she sits there stirring risotto over a cold burner for ten minutes before elias finally goes over and is like 'it... it's not even hot manuela!'

- agnes almost burns down hell's kitchen. twice.

- helen/michael (i think they would use both names, but i haven't decided yet) just can't remember the orders that elias calls out. he'll call 'two wellingtons one halibut one new york strip' and he'll ask helen/michael to repeat it back and they'll be like *dial up noises* 'two wellingtons, one- one tuna, um...' and elias is standing there like 😐

- in all of oliver's time in hell's kitchen, elias doesn't like a single original dish he does for any of the challenges. oliver, in his cut-away interviews, is like 'well, clearly he just doesn't recognize talent' when quote-unquote 'talent' is like... two weirdly butchered overcooked fillets and pomegranate mint pink peppercorn sauce.

- daisy sends up so much raw fish. the kind that elias slams down on the table and smushes beneath his hand because he's so frustrated. she has basira check it, basira says it's not ready, and for some reason she walks it up anyway. once (and only once) she sends up overcooked fish and elias is like 'finally, some fucking variety in your mistakes'

- julia talks back to elias, and when she gets cut, she says right to his face, 'you're making a huge mistake and you'll regret it' and then stomps away just to stomp right back when he says, a bit snidely, 'get out of my fucking kitchen.' she is escorted away by security. everyone else is like 😳🤐 it is silent in that room.

- basira is extremely meticulous in her cooking. this also makes her a very slow chef who tends to get in her head as a way to cope with the insanity of the kitchen around her. she'll often be like a brick wall when people try to talk to her and then pick up a pan and say 'walking scallops to the pass!' when the risotto still has three minutes to go.

- naomi is the unfortunate pasta-waster. she also basically falls apart on garnish, sends up raw eggplant three times in a row, can never remember what garnish goes with which thing. when they're prepping the kitchen she's standing with a little list trying to remember what goes in each dish.

- sasha is... not very good in the beginning, but around episode three there's such a sudden shift in her cooking that people swear she's not the same person anymore. the main way sasha avoids elimination in the beginning is her team not losing dinner services, despite the fact that she sends up near-consistent rubber scallops and salty risotto. the audience is surprised when she's in the final four, but she says in the cut-away interview, 'i just realized what i needed to do and i did it. i'm a different chef right now than i was when i came here, that's for sure'

- georgie once butchers thirty racks of lamb incorrectly during prep and they have to throw all of them away. she also has a tendency to struggle with cutting lamb and is often like 'melanie, just. can you do this for me' because melanie is frighteningly good at cutting meat in one slice.

- melanie is the contestant who gets in arguments with nearly everybody all the time but then next episode is friends with them again. this happens sometimes in the span of five minutes with jon, and people just cannot decide if they're friends or not. (they are.) she also makes a signature dish that elias refuses to eat because her steak is so raw it's 'still mooing' and she's like 'well if he'd just tasted it he'd know that my flavors were good.'

- jordan drops an entire pan of wellingtons. ten wellingtons just. rolling all over the floor. elias is furious and he has to go over to the other kitchen, borrow some wellingtons, and apologize to the other diners for the now-thirty minute wait time. then, he has jordan go out and apologize directly. jordan's cut-away interview is just him hanging his head and whispering, 'fuck me'

#ask #anon #tma hk au #i am so glad that people like this au!! #i thought it might be too obscure/weird haha #(i've also never watched the mistake compilations only a few full seasons so i'm drawing off of what i've seen so far!) #which is mostly 'stone-cold' and 'rubber' yelled ad nauseam lol

[vs-redemption]

who are your favorite top ten black clover characters & ships? talk about them! ~tat!

From Cindy: Hello tat! I hope you are doing well today and thank you for visiting my blog. It was really fun to write this because I got the chance to really think about the characters in depth. I’ll be honest, I’m not much of a shipper so I couldn’t come up with 10. I did my best to think of and write about as many ships and brotps as I could though.

Also, I got your other ask about BNHA as well! I have a Japanese lesson I need to prepare for this evening, but I’ll definitely get that posted tomorrow sometime!! Thanks again!!

This is very long, so I put it under a cut :)

Top Ten Black Clover Characters

Yami Sukehiro

I love everything about this guy. He’s hilarious, number one. Everything he says cracks me up and the nicknames he uses for people are gold. I like that he insults people and makes toilet jokes so casually. He comes off crass, but it’s the fact that he treats everyone equally that makes me respect him so much. He holds everyone, including himself, to the same standards. He doesn’t care about your past, wealth, appearance, gender, unconventional magic abilities or wacky personality. No matter who you are, he will call you out if you’re not acting the way you should, but will also back you up and support you when it’s needed. He’s a great leader because he treats everyone equally and is also very accepting that everyone is different.

Luck Voltia

Luck was one of the first characters I fell in love with. I don’t have a lot deep meaning behind how I feel like I do with Yami though. I just really enjoy his chaotic energy and the fact that he wants to fight people all the time. I also think his magic is super badass. His little lightning boots and gloves are so cute. I just wanna cuddle him and ruffle his hair.

Finral Roulacase

I feel so bad for Finral. This poor love starved boy doesn’t deserve the heaping amounts of anxiety he always seems to be feeling. I know he’s supposed to be the ‘perverted’ character, but compared to characters from other anime (Mineta [BNHA] Meliodas [SDS]) he’s not that bad. He tries so hard to be a gentleman by taking people on dates, complimenting them, giving them flowers, and not physically molesting them lol but they never give him a second glance. I also love his character growth so far. Watching him find self-worth beyond being just a mode of transportation, and confidence enough to stand up to his brother has been really fun to watch. I’m so proud of him and I think he’s amazing!

Zora Ideale

This guy. Haha His blunt honesty is so uncomfortable but hilarious at the same time. Like Yami, he calls people out but is somehow so much more offensive about it. I love how he just gives people unsolicited criticism and then adds injury to insult like “oh by the way, here’s a freaking stink bug in your nostril.” To be fair though, he is just as harsh on himself and will acknowledge (to himself) when he made a mistake. His backstory is also so tragic! It is seriously messed up what happened to his dad, but I love that Zora uses that trauma to try and change the word for the better by being the best magic knight he can be and also encouraging (threatening?) other magic knights to be better too. He could’ve so easily become a villain, but he didn’t and I think that’s really honorable.

Mereoleona Vermillion

Oh my god. I love this woman so much. The fact that she was supposed to be the captain of the Crimson Lions but said “nope” and then just went off by herself to live in the most dangerous places in the wild to get stronger is just phenomenal to me. I also really like that, even though she’s a royal and a member of the Vermillion family, she doesn’t just focus on her own squad. It was great when she showed up at the Black Bulls hide out and straight up kidnapped them to have them join her training. I’m just in awe of both her physical and mental strength. She was so cool when she went up against all those elves by herself. I’m not caught up with the manga, but I think I saw a spoiler about her recently and I’m very excited to find out more about it. I pretty much wish I was Mereoleona. She is my spirit animal.

Charmy Pappitson

There is a lot to adore about Charmy. First and foremost, she is an adorable badass. I love that her passion for food is something she shares with her allies and friends instead of being something that makes her greedy. I feel like Charmy is underrated because her magic is great for restoring mana, defense and offense. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t she one of the highest ranked knights in the black bulls? I also love how she gets away with a lot of shit just because she’s cute. The episodes where she straight up just hops onto the wizard king’s lap and feeds him snacks without anyone batting an eye get me every time!

Vanessa Enoteca

Sometimes I think about how Vanessa was willing to give up her own freedom just to save Asta’s arms, and how she gave up drinking for a few episodes in order to focus on a way to not only make herself stronger for upcoming battles, but the rest of her teammates as well. I like her dedication to the Black Bulls. Her thread magic is also pretty cool and I like the clever ways she’s learned to use it.

Fuegoleon Vermillion

Poor Fuegoleon is so calm and sensible compared to his siblings. I like that he’s a fair leader that makes sure to consider all angles before passing judgement on someone. He is also a dependable captain and full of great wisdom that aids in character development for important characters like Asta and Noelle. I love how he competes with his sister though, and watching them bicker in the episode where they throw a birthday party for that nun lady was silly.

Asta

How can you not like Asta? He has such a big heart and the best self-discipline out of anyone in the show. He would always rather talk things out before resorting to fighting and likes to understand the motivations behind the actions of his enemies. He is unashamed to be himself and continues to pursue his goals even when other people mock him or put him down. I also like that he is more perceptive of how people think or feel than it would seem sometimes.

Sekke Bronzazza

His personality is pretty much the worst (and I think he actually tried to kill Asta after the magic knight exam… asshole) but the way he always manages to fit “ha-ha” into his speech is so funny to me and always cracks me up. And the way everyone calls him the “ha-ha” guy is very amusing to me, especially when he tries and fails to politely correct them. I also love how he always ends up in the most random situations (in Yami’s bathroom or working for the king).

 Top Ten Black Clover Ships/BroTPs

Finral x Vanessa

I guess I just think back to that fight against the Despair guy from the Third Eye because both Finral and Venessa sort of worked together and pushed past their limits for the first time. I think Venessa is also the one that put the green in Finral’s hair, right? I don’t know. Venessa is good for Finral because he’s so insecure and she’s so supportive of other people. They’re cute together.

Yami x Charlotte

I think everyone ships this? lol Charlotte’s independence and personal strength are important to her, and the fact that Yami acknowledges and respects those traits in her makes them a great match. He also constantly encourages her to show her softer side, saying that it’s okay to lean on other people and ask for help. He could help her find balance and be comfortable in her own skin.

Asta x Mimosa

Mimosa is a much better match for Asta than Noelle because Noelle constantly needs validation and attention that she’s just never going to get from Asta. His brain just doesn’t work that way. Mimosa is content with supporting Asta with her magic as best she can, and doesn’t get jealous or competitive in the way Noelle does. Mimosa is soft and gentle which is a nice contrast to Asta’s loud and rough personality.

Yuno x Charmy

I know this is almost like a crack ship, but I can’t help but like it anyway. Like Asta, Yuno isn’t going to be the type of guy to actively pursue a relationship or be overly affectionate. This doesn’t seem to affect Charmy who seems fine with even the most minimal of interaction haha. I think it’s so cute how much she supports and roots for him when she sees him in a fight. And Yuno doesn’t seem to mind her trying to feed him and take care of him either.

Magna x Luck (brotp)

Lucky’s personality is quirky, chaotic, and frankly just difficult to understand, so I think it’s hard for people to get close to him. He comes on so strong with the pranks and desire to fight, plus he doesn’t really know how to hold back. The fact that Magna can endure all that while also seeing Luck as a person on a deeper level than just being some spazzy boy is really wholesome to me. I think it’s good for Luck to have someone who can respect him that way without asking him to change his behavior. I do not think this would work romantically though. Magna is actually pretty sensitive and emotional, and gets pretty upset when Luck is stronger or does better than him in something. It ultimately just drives Magna to work harder, but I think that sort of competition might be bad news in a romantic relationship if he’s always feeling inferior.

Yami x Jack the Ripper (brotp)

I want their friendship! I really do. The way they go from relaxed and having fun to ready to beat each other’s asses is hilarious. And there’s literally no reason for it, they’re just like unnecessarily competitive and I’m living for it. Whether they’re celebrating at a festival, about to have an important meeting with the wizard king, or in the middle of a huge fight with a major bad guy, it doesn’t matter. They will trash talk each other and probably end up brawling. I love it.

Gauche x Grey

The episodes where Gauche had to fight with Gordon and Grey were really cool because those three are probably the oddest oddballs of the Black Bulls. I don’t know if I ship them romantically or just at friends, but the development of the relationship between Gauche and Grey has been interesting and I wouldn’t mind seeing more. Also, please give Gauche something else to obsess over besides his sister lmao

Mars x Fana

I don’t have any strong feelings for them as characters individually, but I like that they fought so hard to protect each other as kids and how they continued to fight for and protect each other after being reunited.

#Tat anon #chat with cindy #black clover #black clover ships #yami sukehiro #luck voltia #finral roulacase #zora ideale #mereoleona vermillion #Charmy Pappitson

[crobby]

mistakes were made

word count: 1285

pairing: peter parker/johnny storm

summary: spidey makes an onlyfans account. it doesn’t go well for him.

for the spideytorch gc bwahaha

___

Peter’s not a charity case, he’s just… making a financial choice that may involve getting practically free money from strangers.

Things are a bit tight right now, is all. JJJ is paying him even less than usual, rent got bumped up, and he needs to pay for a repair on the spidey suit after an especially gnarly battle.

So, yeah, he could use some extra cash, which is why he’s up at ten-at-night slouched over his computer and creating an OnlyFans account.

It’s a perfectly respectable thing to do in his situation. He’s not going to be posting spider-porn or anything like that. He doesn’t know what he’ll post, actually. People would probably pay to see Spider-Man do anything, even just read a book. Oh! He could do little biology lessons. That’s a great idea because he’s literally a biology teacher. Big brain boy.

After putting the final touches on his account, he gets set up to start filming. He’s not going to splurge on fancy equimptment, so his phone camera and a lamp are going to have to do.

He feels weird talking to an inanimate object as if it was a real person but he makes it work. Adding in his usual brand of bad jokes to help ease the awkwardness of it all, he goes over a (not-so) simple biology concept and posts it. An hour later, he checks his phone to see hundreds of notifications. That was quick, he thinks.

Peter gets on a posting schedule, releasing a few videos each week. He quickly amasses hundreds of thousands of followers after Tweeting about it on his Spider-Man account. It’s not verified, but people generally accept that it’s actually him.

He was right about the whole ‘I can post about literally anything and people will eat it up’ thing. He doubts anyone actually cares about biology; they just want to see his face--well, Spider-Man’s face.

Peter’s never been more liquid in his life; he’s got cash flowing out the wazoo. It’s nice, which is why something has to go wrong. The infamous Parker Luck never lets him catch a break.

The day in question starts out fine; he catches his train, doesn’t get mugged, and there’s no villainry for him to stop.

It’s when he walks into the school that things begin to take a turn for the worse. His students are whispering, which is normally fine because they’re asshole kids but today they seem like they’re all whispering about the same thing: him. On top of that, several students whoop and whistle at him in the halls.

Something’s up.

He makes his way into his classroom, trying his best to avoid anyone and everyone. After a bit, the students start filing in.

A boy shouts, “Get it Mr. Parker!”

Peter’s head shoots up from where it was bent over various papers. “Excuse me?”

“We saw what your husband tweeted,” a girl pipes up, blushing.

“I--what?” Peter scrambles to find his phone in his messy bag.

The girl places a hand over her mouth. “You didn’t know?”

“No, I didn’t know,” Peter snaps. Oops, he really shouldn’t snap at his students. He finally finds his phone and opens up Twitter to see an alarming amount of missed notifications. Yikes. Going directly to Johnny’s Tweet, he nearly bursts a blood vessel.

Johnny Storm

@thehumantorch

Yeah, me, my husband, and Spider-Man had a threesome. What about it?

Why on Earth did he post that?!

“Give me a second,” he tells his students, angrily dialing Johnny’s number and stepping out into the hall.

It rings once before Johnny answers, “Hey babe.”

“Hey? That’s all you have to say? Hey?”

“Oh. You saw the Tweet.”

“Yeah I saw the Tweet! What the fuck, Johnny?”

“Hear me out! It was necessary! Okay so basically I accidentally walked into the background of one of your videos in my underwear and everyone thought that I cheated on you with Spider-Man and people were getting really mad about it so I had to do some damage control!”

“Your idea of ‘damage control’ was to tell the entire world that we had a threesome?!”

A startled student looks up at him from the water fountain. Sorry, he mouths to her, pointing at his phone.

“It was the best I could come up with! People believed it and nobody thinks you’re Spider-Man! I think I did alright!”

“I have an entire class of teenagers making fun of me right now! Nothing about this is alright!”

Johnny pauses. “I, ah, didn’t think about that.”

Peter pinches the bridge of his nose. “What are we gonna do about this?”

“I don’t think we can do anything, hon. People will stop talking about it eventually.”

Sighing, Peter resigns himself to his fate. “Yeah, okay. You’re right. Sorry I got so mad.”

“Lol it’s okay, sorry for making some teenagers make fun of you.”

“Did you just… say ‘lol’ out loud?”

“Yes.”

“I--okay. I’ve got to go. Bye, love you.”

“Love you too!”

Peter hangs up, pocketing his phone and heading back into the classroom. “Sorry about that, I had to… talk to someone. Let’s do some biology, yeah?”

Getting into the lesson, he can almost forget the shitshow on the internet. Almost.

A boy raises his hand.

“Go ahead,” Peter says.

“Is it true?”

Peter plays dumb. “What, that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell? Yeah, that’s true.”

“No, the thing about Spider-Man.”

Peter sighs. They’re all looking at him expectantly and he can’t really deny it at this point without raising a whole horde of other questions.

“Yep,” he lies, “It’s true. No more questions about it, though.”

The statement is met with a chorus of disappointed groans.

“Come on, biology is better than gossip,” he tries.

“No, it’s not.”

“Regardless, we’re not talking about this anymore. Get your textbooks out and turn to page three-hundred and ninety-four.”

___

Peter was graced with three lovely, peaceful weeks before shit hits the fan. Again.

He’s teaching, just like last time--why do bad things always happen when he’s teaching?--and he’s just told a hilarious joke when he notices a student acting weirdly.

It’s not the ‘I have a vape pen hidden in my sleeve and I really hope you don’t notice’ type of weird. Peter’s not sure what type of weird this is, just that he doesn’t like it.

He tries to ignore it--he really does--but the kid’s barely hiding the fact that he’s doing something, which is gathering the attention of a handful of other kids.

He peeks over the boy’s shoulder as he hands out worksheets to find him watching one of his OnlyFans videos. That’s not good.

“Care to tell me why you’re on your phone in the middle of class?”

The kid jumps. “Sorry, Mr. Parker! I wasn’t doing anything--just, uh…”

“Watching Spider-Man’s OnlyFans videos?”

“...Yeah. Do you steal his jokes?”

Peter frowns. “What?”

“It’s just--a minute ago, you said the same joke he did in this video.” The boy turns up the volume and rewinds the video to the point where Spider-Man does, in fact, say the exact same joke Peter said not even five minutes ago.

“Why does his voice sound like yours?” a girl asks innocently, not knowing that she just ruined Peter’s whole life.

“It, uh... doesn’t?” he stammers.

“No, it definitely does,” a boy says, “Wait! Oh my gosh, you didn’t have a threesome with your husband and Spider-Man, you are Spider-Man!”

The students break out into a roar of chatter, all asking questions and sharing their own theories.

“Nope,” Peter decides, walking out of the classroom--nay, out of the country. This is it. He’s done for.

He never should’ve made that OnlyFans account.

#my fic #peter parker #johnny storm #spideytorch #spider man fanfiction #fanfic #marvel #marvel comics #spider man #spider-man #spiderman #human torch #peter's a teacher in this one #and he and johnny are married #my writing #mine

[shinygoku]

Notable eps of CSatM

I’ve been working on a Top Ten episodes list for Captain Scarlet and the Mysterons, and at first I was going to group the subjects here into that post as a sort of Honourable Mentions category. However, as I’m not massively fond of the eps in question, I don’t want them on my Favourites list which is already going to be very long, so here’s something to cover these Notable installations and give a preview of the sort of thing y’all can see when the main post is finished!

Notable does not mean Good nor Bad. They may be Important, or Experimental, or the like. At least one’a these is kind of a Fandom Darling, but for reasons that irk me, but it’s not the episode itself at fault.

SPOILERS for everything featured below the Cut!

THE MYSTERONS

Our series begins with quite the bang! Many bangs, in fact!

A man’s fatal mistake on Mars springboards a full out War of Nerves declared by the unseen but all powerful aliens, only ever shown with twin rings of light, a deep, booming voice, and their explosive actions. Their first act is to declare their intent to assassinate The World President, and part of the means to this end result in the death of the original Captain Scarlet, before he’s replaced by an identical, indestructible copy. He later is broken from the alien programming to become the main asset in the fight against them...

This episode has the unenviable task of having to balance exposition with an exciting story, to keep the audience interested and not completely lost in the concept. It’s a partial success, unfortunately bogged down with scenes that feel much slower or outright pointless (most notable to me is The President being shown... how he escaped from an assassination attempt. HE WAS THERE, DOING IT!) and with not enough time for the mystery of Retrometabolism, which ends up getting awkwardly shoved into the closing couple of minutes.

On the whole it does what it needed to, but I feel it should have been rewritten another time or two, and/or have been as long as a Thunderbirds episode instead of the brisker 25 minutes of this series.

ATTACK ON CLOUDBASE

IT WAS ONLY A DREAM! IT WAS ONLY A DREAM! IT WAS ONLY A DREAM, BABES!!

Because main man Gerry Anderson wanted to have a Comedy episode that he admits became a Black Comedy, and that dude loves Dream Episodes.

This episode, other than being a Dream, also has a swanky new Barry Gray score that Gerry paid for out of pocket. Also I do, in fact, find it a very funny episode. Unfortunately, there’s a dark cloud hanging over this, especially in Fandom spaces.

Too many people take it too seriously.

I’ve seen a guy who does work for the official Gerry Anderson youtube channel, and another dude who has a detailed blog with episode recaps of all the Thunderbirds eps and 5 Scarlet eps, among other things. But both of them have the bad take that it would have worked better as an actual thing that happened, maybe as the series finale. While this would have been a huge Downer, I can at least see where this train of thought comes from, as this is the darkest series yet and it would really shake up the status quo. And if it were written well, I may’ve appreciated a sad or bittersweet ending... BUT

This Episode was never intended to be a finale, and it shows! Because of it’s nature as a dream from Miss “I’ll abandon my comms and the meagre shelter I landed with to wander away aimlessly in the desert” Symphony Angel, it’s a very Odd experience. Again, it’s funny, but the characters are Out Of, at the mildest with one trait exaggerated and at the most extreme they become utter morons.

Symphony’s delirious, heat stroke’d mind also has some curious biases, like Blue randomly declaring his love for her although there’s next to no actual indication of this in the other episodes, and seemingly as a subconscious admittance that Blue and Scarlet are indeed very close, she to pairs Scarlet with White to keep him out of the way. I really can’t overstate how weird the White and Scarlet interactions are in this.

But there’s more! The Mysterons themselves are also wildly different to every other time they do anything. Completely breaking from their insidious, subversive nature of corrupting machinery remotely or having human pawns do the dirty work, they swarm Cloudbase in stereotypical UFOs. How gauche! How very Non-Mysteron!!

And Scarlet’s nigh inevitable death for this episode is hands down the lamest, being a slightly bumpy landing that leaves no blood, no massive smoking fire or explosion, yet this kills him and leads Blue to declare him perma-dead for reals this time. The dude’s walked off much worse!

But it’s ok, because it ain’t the last episode, was never made to be, and the only ‘canon’ events are Symphony getting shot down, wandering off and then later being found. Everything else, including the Mysteron’s opening titles threats and the bizarre shipping, were part of a fever dream contained in her head.

Damn, that was a lot to cover. Onto the last episode, which actually is the Last Episode!

THE INQUISITION

I don’t have as much to say here - it’s a Clip Show! About 2/3 of it’s runtime are adventures we’ve already seen, though the chosen selection is a little odd.

First is Big Ben Strikes again, which is tense and clever but far from one of my favourites. Then the fantastic Crater 101, which is one of my favourites! Finally, an edit of The Trap which spares us from the overly long dungeon scene lol

What I do like from this ep is the original content, which I would have utterly loved as a dedicated episode of its own. We open on Scarlet and Blue having a romantic date at an Inn, however it’s been infiltrated by Mysterons who Roofie Blue and spirit him away. He wakes up to find he’s in Cloudbase Control, sans White and Green and is being questioned by someone claiming to be from the Intelligence wing of Spectrum and demanding Blue tells him the Cypher codes.

We and Blue both know something’s terribly amiss, and I really got mad on his behalf at the [Mysteron] dude questioning him so rudely. I was also filled with sadistic glee when Blue breaks out and Scarlet arrives to blast the hell out of the Film Studio the Mysterons were using in this extensive scheme.

Again, this could have been fascinating if the other part of the episode was Scarlet focusing his efforts on tracking Blue down. The Scarlet and Blue interactions is something that really appeals to me, a last hurrah with more focus would have been a delight.

With the series only concluded in the comics, it’s hard not to feel a bit cheated that this is where the show ends, but I’ll absolutely take this And The Adventure Continues flavour over something like Attack On Cloudbase :P

This concludes the Notable Episode list! Soon I’ll be back with my Top Ten!

Until then, DON DON DON DODODO DON

#Captain Scarlet and the Mysterons #Captain Scarlet #Captain Blue #Supermarionation #CutCat Top Lists

[churkey]

Been thinking about 'the grovel' in romance and how it applies to Sterek.

If I'm allowed to toot my own horn, I'd have to say that one of the key aspects of my stories is trope inversion or subversion. Being irritated with a commone fandom trope is most often what motivates a particular story. Not all of them, sure, but a lot---possibly even most.

On some tumblr post about romance novels and why they're Totally Valid, someone mentioned a frequent aspect is someting called 'the grovel': wherein the love interest expresses sincere remorse over a harm done. Something a lot of women find satisfying because in real life men---if they notice at all---rarely apologize for anything. They usually don't care enough about women's feelings. Or (worse, imo) they aren't willing to do the emotional labour to address the harm.

Anyway. Not the point.

The point is that this romance feature explains a lot about what goes on in sterek fic. Most sterek fics are written from Stiles' perspective, usually framing Stiles as the main character and Derek as the love interest.

As a result, Stiles is usually the one done wrong by his man and Derek is the one grovelling1.

It made me realize that---more than any other trope---this is something my fics usually invert or subvert.

Learning about this romance trope helped me understand one of my main frustrations with sterek fic: that Stiles can seemingly do no wrong. Or, if he does make mistakes, he rarely faces any substantive consequences for them. Or, if he does face consequences, they're usually framed as unjust2.

It frustrates me enough that I'm writing fanfic like ten years after the last time I wrote any.

I'm pretty sure everyone knows that I have a big bias for Derek (vs. Stiles). As a result, I turn their normal dynamic around. Stiles' negative qualities cause Derek harm and he's the one who needs to grovel (in the fics where something like this happens).

(Now I want to make a rec list for fics like this. There wouldn't be many...)

I could write a lot about the heteronormative framing of this, given how Derek is usually considered the more masculine-butch-top, whereas Stiles is more feminine-bottom. Something only further supported by this replication of a common hetero-romance trope. I could write a lot about it... but I won't. Lol. ↩︎

I'm particularly thinking about the 'stiles is kicked out of the pack' trope here. I remember reading one fic where Stiles' recklessness gets two of the pack members like burned almost to death... So he gets kicked out and yet Derek is the one grovelling by the end. The mind boggles. ↩︎

#teen wolf #meta #sterek

[talk-to-me-devil-again]

To Be of Use (Joker fanfic, super smutty)

Ok so this is the first fic I’ve written in over ten years (since the Dark Knight came out lol), and the first fic I’ve ever finished, after that one sorry attempt back in ‘08. It’s super smutty and perverted, turn back now, it has  Dom/sub, anal, warning this is for GROWN folk!!! Also posted on AO3 under the name TalkToMeDevilAgain

Summary:

Reader has been a mental patient at Arkham for quite some time, and is bored and sex-starved. They can’t help but take notice of a handsome and mysterious new patient. Smut smut smut

Notes:

I based a lot of this on my own countless visits to mental hospitals. They’re boring and there’s nothing to do, so it’s natural that sex preoccupies your thoughts. I got the idea for this fic when I was in the mental hospital yet again, just a couple of weeks ago. I know that security at an actual, non-fictional mental hospital wouldn’t be this lax and that a male patient with a history of violence wouldn’t be allowed to mingle in the dayroom (common area) with females, but just suspend disbelief for a bit lol. Also, it’s entirely plausible that Reader has no idea who Arthur/Joker is or what he’s done, they typically don’t allow you any access to the news in places like that. I hope you all enjoy, I wrote this from like 3-5 AM and I know there are mistakes and that I probably switch back and forth between past tense and present tense, but I’m proud of this hot, perverted little fic hahaha

Work Text:

It was hard to tell how many hours you’d been sitting in the dayroom. They didn’t keep a clock on the wall, because they knew some of the patients would obsess over it. In fact, the concept of “time” didn’t really seem to exist here. Days just stretched on and bled into each other. You had no idea what was going on in the outside world, as watching the news was forbidden - if the patients here couldn’t handle clocks, they definitely couldn’t handle the news. Apart from the boredom and monotony, you really didn’t mind. You felt better whenever you were locked up: you ate and showered regularly, and your sleep schedule was almost normal. You’d once joked with a friend who was constantly in and out of prison, that the two of you couldn’t resist the allure of “three hots and a cot” - three hot meals a day and a bed. Still, the boredom was a big problem. And the lack of any... stimulation. You desperately needed that. Not “cuddling” or “affection”, god no. As usual, your desires were ravenous and carnal. You’d never been the prettiest or the youngest or the skinniest, at least not in a long time, but you knew what men liked and how to give it to them. They were often able to sense that about you, too. Some of the more handsome and well-built med techs had to avert their gaze when you started eye-fucking them, but you knew they wanted it. Just not enough to lose their jobs over it.

Right now, it wasn’t the med techs who interested you. You weren’t looking at the man seated next to you, but you knew that he was looking at you, and that he didn’t care if you noticed. He’d shown up in the ward a few weeks ago, and the two of you hadn’t talked much. To tell the truth, you’d been nervous, and it wasn’t like you to be nervous around an attractive man, not since your insecure high school days that were long gone. There was something that was just different about this man: dark and handsome (though not exactly tall), thin but with defined muscles, high cheekbones, a faint scar above his lip, and unnervingly green eyes. Your standards had fallen since you’d been locked up in here, and you were so sex-starved that you found yourself fantasizing about employees and other patients who weren’t even your type. But oh god, he was your type, he was the very definition of your type. You’d always preferred the men who were a little less obvious - the tall burly men with the straight white teeth and symmetrical features, the kind who looked like high school quarterbacks, were always your last choice. The man sitting right next to you was the one who’d recently been occupying your thoughts, whenever you retreated to your room and gave yourself orgasm after orgasm to pass the time.

You knew he was looking at you, and it made you squirm in your seat, squeezing your legs together as the tension in your pelvis became unbearable. You knew you were soaking wet, and you wondered if he could smell it. The thought of that just turned you on even more. On the occasions you’d caught him looking at you, as you pretended like you were casually gazing around the room, the hunger in his eyes had startled and excited you. Today you were pretending to be engrossed in an old re-run of Sanford and Son on the tiny dayroom tv, but you knew that he knew better. What was the point in continuing the pretense? The sexual tension had reached its boiling point. You made up your mind, and without taking your eyes from the tiny TV bolted to the wall, you slowly reached out your hand and placed a single index finger on his knee. The restless bouncing of his leg stopped, and you gently ran your finger over the top of his thigh, from the knee almost to his groin, and back again. You were barely touching him, but you knew he had to be getting hard.

You kept this up for what was probably only a minute or so, but what seemed like hours. Despite the loud screeching of the TV, you could hear only your breath and his, both growing slower and deeper as your arousal increased. Suddenly his hand shot out and grabbed your wrist, firm and powerful, and he leaned into you to whisper in your ear. “I’m going to make you regret that,” he breathed, and he nibbled your earlobe for a split second before returning to his former position as if nothing had happened. You audibly moaned, though no one noticed - no one here ever noticed anything, as the patients were too caught up in their own worlds and the med techs and nurses never stopped gossiping and joking around amongst themselves. It was like you were the only two people in the world. You finally met his gaze, and his green eyes seemed as if they’d turned black. He looked like he wanted to devour you, and it was the most erotic thing you’d ever seen. You couldn’t handle it anymore - you abruptly got up from your seat so you could go to your room and release yourself, over and over. You didn’t have a choice in the matter, you knew that you’d explode like a dying star if you didn’t. When you reached the door, you looked back at him one last time: his arms were crossed, and he was smirking at you. You nearly ran to your room, desperate for relief.

You guessed it was around midnight, though you had no way of knowing. As usual you couldn’t sleep, and the sleeping pills they gave you each night didn’t help, as you’d long since developed a tolerance to them. Orgasm after orgasm had left you soaking wet, but despite your skill at pleasuring yourself, you still hadn’t found the relief you needed. You wanted the dark-haired man with the green eyes to make use of your wet and willing holes, to just use you as a fuck toy, rough and hard and punishingly. You knew most people didn’t think like this, that they would want to take things slower and more gently. They would want to kiss, and receive oral sex, and maybe even cuddle afterwards. Those things all seemed alien and deeply uncomfortable to you, but then again, if you were “most people” you wouldn’t be locked up in a place like this to begin with. There was nothing to do here, and nothing to think about, so you had no choice but to retreat into your own fantasy world. You couldn’t stop re-living that moment, over and over in your head like a video tape, when he’d whispered threateningly into your ear and given your earlobe a little bite. God, you hoped he intended to make good on his threat.

The door creaked open, and you jumped, pulling the sheets to cover your naked body. The door was always ajar, as the nurses had to do rounds every hour or so, so there was no point in shutting it. You really didn’t want a nurse to see you naked and horny, so you flipped over and faced the wall, unconvincingly trying to pretend you were asleep. The door pushed open all the way, and you knew it wasn’t a nurse, you just knew, though you didn’t dare face the approaching footsteps and spoil the moment. An elegant, masculine hand reached out and pulled the blankets down to your knees. The hand reached beneath your thighs, and found your wet pussy - those elegant fingers slid in, and pulled out with an audible pop. You gave up all pretense of being asleep, and looked up and locked eyes with the dark-haired man. You’d never seen someone look so hungry, and you imagined that his expression was mirrored on your face. Never breaking eye contact with you, he brought his hand to his mouth and sucked your wetness from the fingers that had just been inside you. You moaned just like earlier, but louder and more urgent.

In what seemed like the blink of an eye, you were pulled out of bed and bent over the simple wooden dresser that was one of the only furnishings in your sterile room. Before you had time to process what was happening, the man with the green eyes had started spanking you, though describing it with a word as simple as “spanking” didn’t seem right. This wasn’t the playful and somewhat reluctant teasing of some twenty-something boytoy, with whom you’d begged and pleaded to add something spicy to the vanilla missionary sex that he preferred. This was rapid, brutal, and punishing, and you had to bite down on your fist to avoid yelling loud enough to attract the attention of an employee. It fulfilled a primal and instinctual need in you, that you couldn’t possibly find the words to explain. The punishment seemed to go on for hours, and you knew your ass was bright red by that point: claimed by him, marked by him. You knew you’d bear these marks for days, and the thought of it somehow made you even wetter than before.

Another rough shove, and you were off the dresser, down to your bare knees on the cold linoleum floor. He was still wearing the standard issue white scrubs that every other patient wore, and the thought of you being naked and exposed before him while he was still fully-clothed, kneeling beneath him as he stood looking down at you, made your pussy throb. You looked up at him as if he were a god, tears of pleasure and pain screaming from your eyes, and he spoke for the first time since he’d quietly entered your room. “I’m tired of you teasing me, you stupid little slut. And I’m tired of the way you look at the other men here. Do you think I don’t notice? I’m going to fuck you so hard you won’t be able to walk for days, and when I’m finished you’ll know that you belong to me. Is that understood?” You nodded, and when that doesn’t seem to satisfy him, you managed to eke out a simple “Yes”. That earned you a slap on the face that almost made you see stars. “Yes what, whore?” You understood what he wanted. “Yes sir,” you replied. “Good. You’re learning,” he said, and laughed in a way that you’d never heard anyone laugh before.

Still looking down on you, naked and kneeling, he ran his hand through your hair, cupped your cheek in a way that was almost gentle, and pried your lips apart with his rough thumb. “Open your mouth,” he commanded, and you eagerly obliged as he reached for the waistband of his pants and pulled them down just low enough to expose his hard, impressive cock. With a rough thrust he was in your mouth, and you were in heaven. He tasted like precum and smelled like sex. You instantly went to work, utilizing your years of experience in getting men off. It had never seemed like a chore to you, and you couldn’t understand why anyone wouldn’t enjoy it. He put his hand on the back of your head, tangling it in your hair, as he slowly and almost gently started fucking your mouth. At one point he removed himself from your mouth, thumped his dick against your face a few times, and used the tip to spread precum around your mouth like messy lipstick, before re-entering you. You reached up a hand and cupped his balls, starting to massage them as your expert mouth took his cock in, over and over. He clearly hadn’t been expecting that, and while he was clearly struggling to maintain his composure, he let out an involuntary moan that deeply excited you.

You didn’t think he’d be able to hold on much longer like this, and he clearly seemed to agree, as you suddenly found yourself being pulled from the floor by your wrists and shoved up against the cool, sterile white wall. He used one hand to pin your wrists in place above your head with his considerable strength, while the other hand pinched your nipples and roughly squeezed and slapped at your tits. He stopped working on your tits and suddenly entered you, gliding through your wetness with ease, slow at first, then fucking you at a frenzied pace as your pussy stretched to accommodate him. While never ceasing the frantic pace of his thrusts, he leaned in as if to whisper something like he had earlier that day, then took your sensitive earlobe into his mouth and started working it with his teeth. By that point you weren’t even moaning, just mewling helplessly like a lost cat, caught up in pain and ecstasy. He pounded endlessly into your pelvis in a way that released the tension that had been building there for months, making you come completely undone as you orgasmed around his cock, again biting your fist so you wouldn’t scream and get both of you caught. He didn’t seem anywhere close to being finished, though. “You fucking belong to me,” he breathed into your ear. “I’m going to prove it to you.”

You weren’t exactly sure what he meant, hadn’t he already proved it to you? For the first time you felt a sense of trepidation, that formed an intoxicating mixture with the blind lust that had already taken over your senses. He pulled out of you and gently but firmly guided you to your bed, laying you down face first with your ass hanging over the edge. You felt his tip gently nudge against the sensitive, erogenous bundle of nerves that surrounded your other hole, the one that most men seemed to be afraid of. You nearly screamed with anticipation: you’d done this before but it had been a while, though you often explored this area on your own time. The secret that most people didn’t realize was that being filled in that hole felt like pure, utter domination. That there was no better way to belong to someone, body and soul, than to give up this part of yourself to them. For what seemed like an eternity he rubbed the head of his cock between both holes, and you eventually realized that he was using your own natural lubricants to prepare you for him.

When the tip of his dick broached your barrier, he seemed to understand how important it was to take this slowly, letting you adjust to his size. After an interminable amount of time he began steadily pushing in and out, and the sensation was so pleasurable and intense that you buried your face in your mattress and writhed and screamed as your hands grasped at the sheets. He reached out and took one of your hands into his firm grip, never breaking his slow but relentless pace. He lowered his body onto yours and murmured, “God, you feel so fucking tight. I own you. I’ll always own you. I’ll never let you forget that.” You nodded and replied submissively, “Yes sir. I’m yours. I’m only yours. Thank you for teaching me who I belong to.” That seemed to excite him, and his thrusting grew faster, though he was obviously trying to control it. Your fingers snaked down to your clit as he continued to fuck you in the ass, and you started teasing at yourself, determined to come at the same time he did.

At this moment you felt complete bliss. The mysterious dark-haired man, whose name you still didn’t know, had claimed you as his. He’d marked your body and used all of your holes for his pleasure. You knew you’d both be locked up in here for a long time, and that security was pretty lax at night. The employees were underpaid and overworked, and even if he were caught sneaking into your room you knew he wouldn’t face any real consequences. There was no limit to the amount of times he could claim you like this. You were useful to him, and being used like this was your dream. A smile grew across your face, as his thrusting and your ministrations to your clit reached their climax. You let out a muffled yell into the mattress as you climax, and feel yourself be filled with that familiar hot liquid. He collapses on your body and the two of you pant in unison, his cock still inside of you. You both know he can’t stay much longer before getting caught and scolded, but you commit every detail of this moment to memory so that it will last forever. He gently kisses you on your cheek, and you’re so happy you could cry.

#joker x reader #arthur fleck x reader #joker fanfiction #joker fanfic #joker smut #hnnngh #joker fandom #arthur fleck fanfic #arthur fleck smut

[hellofaride2021]

Hi, can we please get another 30 questions post? 🥰

Sure, why not? 😊 I found this by searching 30 questions and this one via @immahomosexuall popped up.

1. What do you like and dislike about the way you were brought up?

I like that I was brought up not to judge others. My parents were always clear that I shouldn’t judge people or treat them differently because they were different. Wether that was race, religion, sexuality, disability; I remember being young and them explaing that to me.

I hate my dads temper. I hate that I have the same temper and that we’ve spent too many times clashing and arguing from big stuff to little stuff that turns into big stuff.

2. What do you believe are the 5 biggest issues we face as humans now?

Racism!

Womens rights!

LGBT Rights!

Corona Virus!!!!

And just the rich getting richer and the poor getting poorer and nothing being done to help them/treating them like it’s their fault.

3. If you could write a novel what would it be about?

Since I was a teenager I’ve wanted to write a mystery based on the 1920’s focused on a jazz club singer. Most recently I’ve wanted to write a mystery involving family history. My mother has done family history for years and her findings plus other people’s stories have really inspired me.

4.  What are your beliefs regarding the universe and the nature of life and death?

Honestly? I have no clue. Maybe there’s a God, maybe there isn’t. I do like the idea of reincarnation.

5. Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had. 

This was when I was about ten years old so I don’t remember much of it but involved my friends and I finding a door in a tree, which led to this other world and going on some adventure. The only other thing I remember is us crossing a bridge over lava lol

6. Do you want children? Why or why not? 

Eh. Yes and no lol. Kids are cute and having one I could help grow and watch them fall in love with things, become passionate about would be great. Also giving my parents grandkids would be cool too. But I don’t know if I’m very maternal. I would hate to be the temper filled parent my dad can be and I’m afraid I wouldn’t have the patience with things like learning to ties shoes, tell the time, help with homework.

7. What are your views on gender equality? 

I think you should be paid based on your title and experience wether you’re a man or woman. I think everyone should be treated the same regardless of gender.

8. How do you feel about cultural appropriation? 

It’s wrong, of course. But sometimes I find myself reading about it online, a new one that’s happened and I’ll be like “oh, is that cultural appropriation or just appreciation? And can I really be in a conversation about that?” Basically I’m constantly learning.

There’s actually a photo of my as a child dressed as Pocahontas for a school dance because I was obsessed with her! At the time I had no idea that was cultural appropriation, I was just young and wanted to be like this person I thought was cool, but I feel awful about it now.

9. Where are the 3 places you most want to travel to and why?

NYC for Broadway

Hawaii because I have family there I’ve never met.

New Zealand because I have family there who I’ve met but we’ve never visited because we can’t afford to, but we have an open invitation.

10. What are some things you wish you’d been taught as a child that you weren’t? 

That you may not end up in your dream job but that it’s ok. It doesn’t mean you failed.

11. Talk about some of the biggest mistakes you’ve ever made?

Not having the confidence to fully learn my country’s language which has held me off getting jobs. Also, just dumb family arguments, especially with my dad.

12. Do you feel you are in control of your destiny or do you believe fate controls the course of your life? 

A little of both?

13. Do you believe is ghosts/ spirits? If so why do you think they exist?

Another yes or no. I think some stories we’ve heard are false but I think it’s a possibility.

14. Do you think there are any other forms of intelligent life in the universe? 

There has to be. With how big space is, we can’t be the only ones out there.

15. What do you think constitutes a truly healthy relationship?

Openness, respect, accountability, compromise.

16. How would you like to live your life?

Happy, financially secure and with more confidence.

17. Talk about a time someone treated you badly.

A kid stole my stuffed lamb in nursery lol the same kid also attacked me in the school playground. Once when I was about 14 this girl and a couple of her friends stopped my friend and I because she had a problem with my cousin. She threatened me, hit me and ended up having the cops go to her house and tell her to keep her distance from me or there would be stricter consequences.

18. Talk about a time you treated someone else badly. 

I’ve been pretty bitchy and awful to my sister when we’ve argued.

19. What is something you can’t do that you really wish you could? 

Dance! It’s in the family and I’d love to. Also sing.

20. What are your initial thoughts when somebody tells you they’re religious? 

Interest. What religion are they? How involved are they?

21. Were you more of the victim or the bully as a child? 

Victim in school for sure.

22. How have you changed since you were a child and how have you stayed the same? 

While I’m still kinda shy and social anxious, I’m so much better than I was when I was younger! There have been things I’ve done that I never would have then.

As for the same? Well I’m still the same geeky person I was as a kid who loves marvel, dc, sci fi, supernatural, music, films, tv, reading, history and true crime.

23. Are you the kind of person who has a large group of friends or are you someone who has just a few people they’re close to? 

Just a few close friends. One I’ve known since I was three, the other six and the third since we were sixteen.

24. What qualities have you got from your parents? 

I have for my sarcasm and love of music, musical/dancing and history from my mum, and from my dad his temper, music and true crime.

25. What is one thing you wish somebody would say to you right now?

You’ve won the lottery lol 

26. Describe your ideal partner? 

Off the top of my head; picture a mix of the personality and looks of Matt Bomer, Darren Criss, Robert Downey Jr, Lin Manuel Miranda and Chadwick Boseman. I’m sure I’m missing some but yeah.

27. Describe yourself as a person?

Passionate, anxious, self critical, protective, geeky, sarcastic.

28. What things don’t you do right now that you feel like you morally should? 

Attend protests for things I believe in. I mostly don’t because I’m claustrophobic and those things get large. Did you see the sizes of the Women’s March and BLM? I felt anxious just looking at them.

29. What is your star sign and how accurate do you think it is in describing you?

Scorpio and I think it’s pretty spot on. There’s one or two i think aren’t complety right, but mostly it’s pretty accurate.

30. What sort of terms are you on with your exes? 

I actually have no exes. I am a grown women who has never been in a relationship 🤷🏼‍♀️ it’s partly to do with how shy I used to be (still can be tbh) and also, guys just have never asked me. So yeah.....pandemic is not helping either lol

#30 questions #deep questions #that was fun #i think #lol #anon questions

[makeste]

BnHA 6th Popularity Poll Reaction Post - Risky Spoiler-Dodging Edition

hey guys, so seeing as the results from the 6th popularity poll were leaked today, I figured I would do a separate reaction + analysis post this year, rather than piling it in as an extra on top of the chapter reaction post tomorrow. I figure this makes more sense anyway, since they’re really two completely different things. also this way I can write as much as I want lol.

also, just fyi, I am still completely unspoiled for chapter 293. and probably the smart thing to do to keep it that way would be to log off tumblr and hold off posting this until tomorrow, but I apparently have no impulse control today so oh well. anyway, so I’m hoping you guys will keep this spoiler-free if you don’t mind! as always, I would prefer to just jump right in completely unaware tomorrow like Troy returning to the study room with the pizza boxes lol.

okay so this first part is just going to be my predictions. fyi I am writing this part on Wednesday night, and then I’ll add on the results part on Thursday or Friday (ETA: Thursday, apparently, since I am impatient.)

okay so first of all, just as a refresher, this poll was open to Japanese voters from Aug 3 to Sep 30. meaning chapters 279 through 285. meanwhile last year’s poll took place around the tail end of the MVA arc. so between then and now we had Heroes Rising, the Endeavor Agency arc, and the War arc up to the part where the 1-A kids took on Gigantomachia in Gunga, and started battling Tomura in Jakku. so technically only a couple of arcs, but a LOT of stuff going down in them. oh and season 4 of the anime as well

so! firstly, I predict that my truculent africanized honeybee son will hold on to his crown at #1, coming off a year in which he did some internship-boosted soul searching, borrowed OFA in movie canon, and finished out the voting period as the my-body-moved-on-its-own character development MVP. like CALL ME CRAZY lol, but I’m pretty sure his title is safe. and then after him will be Deku and Shouto as usual

Aizawa should hopefully also have a strong showing because the dude had a banner fucking year. reunited with his old dead friend, took on Tomura with his hopelessly inept hero pals, and then chopped his fucking leg off. he had better be in the top 10. his fucking leg died for this, idk what else he has to do

Endeavor also stands a decent chance of doing well given the internship arc and the final episode of season 4. which I’m sure will go down just swimmingly if that does happen lmao. especially if he somehow manages to rank higher than...

Dabi, which I don’t think he will btw, but you never know. anyways though, but I’m thinking Dabi’s going to have a stronger showing than in past years (in the last poll he only got 367 votes and was ranked 19th). mostly because of his fight in the Gunga mansion, and his cheekily censored name reveal to...

Hawks, who is also going to rank pretty high here, I think. might be he loses some points for killing off Twice, but his back was basically to the wall there. and he has always been very popular, and I think season 4 will also give him a boost, along with his heavy involvement in the first half of the War arc

Tomura was already in 6th place last year and I think he cracks the top 5 this year. he’s gotten exponentially more popular since the MVA arc, and got a boost in the last poll even though his flashback had only just barely happened, and he hadn’t finished Awakening yet and all that stuff. anyway, so he’s only gotten cooler and more tragic since then so I think he makes a big play here

Kirishima, Momo, Tokoyami, and Mina should also hopefully do well, since the poll opened right in the middle of all that Gigantomachia action, and Toko had just got done being an absolute badass and protecting his birb dad. I don’t think he’ll quite make it to the top ten, but he should

and last but not least, I’m hoping that Mirko will come out and take the polls by storm, although I have no clue how popular she is in Japan lol. she’s clearly Horikoshi’s favorite though. she SHOULD be everyone’s favorite, but I mean, we’ll see how it goes

anyway that’s it as far as predictions! and so now, through the magic of writing stuff at different times, we will fast-forward to the part where we actually find out the results!

OH MY GOD YES, STEAMPUNK KHLKSLLKL. HERE FOR IT. JOLLY GOOD SHOW. 5 STARS

Kacchan looks SO COCKY and SO HAPPY and SO ADORABLE, YES I SAID IT. he is adorable as FUCK. I don’t quite know what it is about this particular Kacchan that just screams “LOOK HOW FUCKING CUTE MY STUPID, LOUD SON IS WITH HIS BIZARRE WINDOWPANE-LOOKING CONVERTIBLE SUNGLASS GOGGLES and his POORLY TIED CRAVAT”, but I think it’s because he looks like if a Digimon character and a FMA character had a baby

anyway, so it looks like most of the people present here are more or less who we expected to see. except that I can’t tell for sure if that’s Dabi or Shindou, and if it’s Shindou I’m going to punch somebody in the face so you will have to excuse me

Iida wearing a TRENCHCOAT and a TOP HAT with ENGINE EXHAUST GOGGLE ACCENTS is my new favorite Iida of all time. take note how there is no possible way he can wear those goggles with them sitting on top of his hat like that. plus he’s already got glasses on. these are just purely for aesthetic and IF THAT AIN’T JUST THE STEAMPUNK WAY

Deku out here speaking softly and carrying a lead pipe. Kacchan you best look out. seems like he’s done watching you take first place year after year while he languishes in the number two spot. your only hope is that he trips while attacking you because his boots are unbuckled

Shouto’s standing over there with the rest of the non-first-and-second-place characters, but what are the odds his results are actually within spitting distance of Deku’s same as always. anyway he doesn’t mind, though. also his outfit is by far the most sensible one here, but if you look closely he’s got some sort of fire extinguisher/jet pack thing strapped to his back that’s got a control switch on his belt. Shouto are you jetpacking or putting out fires

Kirishima out here all “I’m not sure what steampunk is so I’m just going to take off my shirt and pose”

AIZAWA WITH THE EYEPATCH SKLKSDLKFJLSKJLDFKJSLDFFJLDKSJFL:KS. SIR. SIR. also, lowkey furious that Horikoshi refuses to show us the automail leg that he is clearly sporting here but which we just can’t see, SHOUTO MOVE GODDAMMIT

Endeavor has TWO fire extinguisher-slash-jetpacks. THE BETTER TO... WHATEVER. look at you here in the top ten again. you really live for that controversy

HAWKS OUT HERE WITH HIS STEAMPUNK BEATS BY DRE AND HIS WEARING A RING ON EVERY FINGER. nice to see you’ve still got your wings there, kiddo. then again Deku still has both of his arms too so who even knows what is going on

BUT SERIOUSLY THOUGH, IS THIS DABI OR SHINDOU. as if I don’t know the truth deep down in my heart. y’all I am gonna flip lmao. it’s not that I dislike Shindou, strictly speaking. but just... I can’t explain what it is, but if you put him and AFO next to each other and told me “you can only punch one”, I would be having a serious crisis. just, THIS FUCKING GUY, idek. STOP SMILING

Tomura looks like he just wandered onto the set here by mistake and has no idea where he is or what is going on. it’s because you’re wearing a bigass severed hand that’s blocking your entire view, Tomura. just take the hand off your face my sweet murder dumpling

anyway! so I managed to also find a link to the full poll results while somehow managing to avoid spoilers, and then I wanted to compare the results to last year’s poll, and so I made... this

hopefully you can all see this. if you’re on desktop you might be screwed, but on mobile you should be able to click and enlarge it. I mean, assuming you actually give a fuck about boring poll analysis spreadsheets lmao

anyway, so there were actually 13k fewer votes cast this year which is a bit of a surprise. is the series not still growing in popularity? do people apparently have better things to do during their quarantine lol

anyways but despite this, and despite getting 8k fewer votes overall, Kacchan still managed almost twice as many as his closest competitor. well fought, Deku. please put down that pipe

I somehow always underestimate the power of ship popularity to influence these things. but for example, it looks like Present Mic got that Vigilantes Trio bump. ride that wave for all it’s worth my man! hell, you got me on board

Iida fucking Tenya somehow got some sort of POWER BOOST out of NOWHERE which I can’t explain at all lmao, but I’m here for it. NOT BAD FOR AN OLD MAN

Sero managed to get the exact same number of votes in both 2019 and 2020. clearly the most loyal fans in the business

Mirko being all the way down at #20 is, of course, a travesty, and I hereby nominate her to be the one to punch Shindou in the face

ngl though, the lack of a single female character in the top ten hurts just a bit. it’s not overly surprising, but still. the worst part of it is that even if you kicked Shindou to the curb and moved everyone else up one slot, it would still be all dudes since Mic beat out Momo by a margin of a little more than a hundred votes. hard to stay mad at Mic for too long, though. ah well

Tomura actually lost a bunch of votes which is a genuine surprise to me. I know the villain standom isn’t as dominant in Japan as it is in Western fandom, but still. you can go ahead and punch Shindou too I guess

Tokoyami lowkey doubled his vote count over the past year while hiding down there at #18. he is slowly becoming more powerful. biding his time

anyway so I think that’s it! I mean not really, but I’m getting kind of tired lol. so just, you know, insert the usual gripes at Overhaul’s ranking here, although we can be happy about Magne making her way onto the list (r.i.p.), and Mineta and AFO taking a very satisfying slide down (all the way out, in AFO’s case; good riddance you bum). Hadou also got a huge boost which is awesome. Mustard’s persistent ownership of the #36 spot will forever remain a mystery to me, but oh well

anyways, this was fun. and I really do feel like everyone is looking away on purpose so that when Deku brains Kacchan with that pipe in about two seconds from now, there will be no witnesses, oh my fucking god

#bnha 293 #bnha popularity poll #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #todoroki shouto #aizawa shouta #shigaraki tomura #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha