#trans insecurity

[healingdemeter]

Trans Insecurity

I have heard from detransistioners as well as Trans Activists that trans people are extremely insecure in their identity, which is why they explode at the smallest thing that threatens it. A lot of well meaning people try to help by jumping through hoops and bending over backwards to assure the trans person that they are whatever they identify as. What those well meaning people have forgotten is the difference between helping and enabling, and what trans people who rely on the assurance of others do not realize is that they are giving away their power.

Real power is being confident enough in your identity so that even if someone challenges it, it doesn’t phase you. Real power is knowing who you are and not having to pretend to be someone different. Real power is being able to hold onto your truth even if someone else does not agree.

Forcing someone else to validate who you are may help in the short term. The hard truth is that even if you can coerce all 8 billion people on this planet to acknowledge your identity (and that is not a realistic goal) it will never be enough if you don’t feel secure in your identity.

Forcing people to shout “trans women are women”, forcing pronouns down people’s throats and making the world walk on eggshells around pronouns and doing everything they can to validate you, and shutting down debate about the research into pediatric transition may feel like things that help in the moment. And they may temporarily give you a boost in self esteem. But in the long term it is making your mental health worse.

Just as a opioid addict believes that heroin will help, in actuality it is hurting.

Real mental health and real healing is looking inward and becoming secure in your own identity. Real mental health is not relying on others to tell you who you are.

And to those of you who are not assuming a trans identity and are trying to be supportive, please consider whether you are really helping or hurting.

#mental health #enabling #mental health vs enabling #trans #detransitioners #trans rights activists #power #Take back your Power #gender critical #trans insecurity

[fungi-maestro]

Happy tdov to fat trans people. 🏳️‍⚧️ Biggest thing that helped me as a trans kid was seeing older fat trans people. There were a lot of really irritating "advice" posts going around early in my time on the internet with a lot of misinformation in them, but one that I constantly saw (in addition to people claiming you should wear your pants rediculously low or only wear button ups) were posts saying you had to lose weight to transition. Can confidently confirm that is completely untrue. 👍

#seal.txt #tdov #that 'sky and mike' image of the two old trans dudes hugging was one that I had saved to my phone as a trans teen #and i would look at it sometimes and just wonder how they had made it #idk its just nice knowing we live that long and its not a requirement to be skinnyin order to be respected and loved and get old #some of the old 'advice' posts i saw were really completely bizarre and a lot of them stick with me to this day in insecurities #this would have been 2016 ish tumblr so i know not that long ago but i would have been around 13 for reference #weird that i remember so many of the things i read back then. i could probably fill a post with things i was misinformed on due to Tumblr #specifically tumblrs run by people that i didnt really have the knowledge or awareness to understand probably didnt have my best interests #like 'trans rights ' blogs i would follow and not notice until much later were quite the opposite #this is the consequence of viewing social media before i knew all the secret codewords and my brain was much less developed than it is now

[punkboyjuul]

5k notes and I apply to a modelling agency

tagging moots for help

@vileviale @the-pack0 @transwerewolfgirlfriend @heckingturtles @a-chaotic-business @artisfox @knickersbar @deathgonewrong @yes-i-exist-shutup

#julian talks #notes #I've always wanted to #but my body insecurities have always gotten in the way #plus being trans means I don't fit into the boxes models are usually in #model #queer

[cryptidmullet]

when tulips erupt from my ribcage, is it grotesque or lovely?

#smth smth insecurity in the face of adoration #ive been going on walks and having thoughts #my art tag #procreate #original art #angel art #trans angel #trans artist #digital art #poetry

[lazylittledragon]

!! QUICK PSA FOR TESTOSTERONE TAKERS !!

warning this is a bit gross so i'll put the photos under the cut but i think it's important because nobody told me about this before i started T

if you're taking testogel/any other T that you put on your skin, please for the love of god moisturise the skin you put it on

gel REALLY dries out your skin and as someone with dry skin anyway it caused my skin to flake and scab and break out more which has left a lot of scarring on my back/chest/shoulders

(yes, T causes acne anyway, but for me personally my skin didn't get that much worse after i started and it's improved since i've been moisturising more so that was the problem for me)

obviously there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with having acne or acne scarring or anything like that (it just makes me a bit insecure and means i have to put off getting tattoos there until it gets better), i just wish i'd started taking care of it earlier

also i would Never want to scare anyone off HRT if they want it because it's been a wonderful magical thing for me but there are some uncomfortable aspects of it and this is just one that i didn't know about

#tw scars #ramble #tboy swag #trans stuff #luckily from a distance it just looks like freckles but it's like. an insecurity i didn't have before #i've always moisturised my face but never my body and i didn't think it would make a difference #spoiler alert it DOES #again hrt is AMAZING and i've NEVER regretted starting it #but. puberty is awkward and uncomfy y'know #at least it's the RIGHT puberty this time #the benefits make all the bad parts SO WORTH IT #also for t takers you do just. have to wash more. because at the drop of a hat your skin starts SCREAMING #also bad combo if you're a scab picker. it's just not nice to go through

[jadewazzletime]

#seriously why did you suddenly impose a driving challenge on yourself #if you’re trans and you’re reading this and you’re insecure about passing know that you’re hot as fuck no matter what #196 #r/196 #196 campfire #ruleposting #rule #traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns #traaa #traa #trans memes

[punkeropercyjackson]

Some very excellent Atsv memes i found on pinterest

#the chest one especially even if she wasn't a minor comics has her insecurities over it played as a joke because her writers are misogynists #gwen stacy #miles morales #hobie brown #pavitr prabhakar #spiderband #ghostflower #trans gwen stacy #spiderverse #atsv #the spider within #btsv #spiderman #trans miles morales #autistic miles #autistic gwen stacy #kidcore!gwen stacy #pastel punk miles morales #kidcore!miles morales #transhet pavitr prabhakar #team dad hobie #ace hobie #autistic hobie brown #trans hobie brown #unlabeled hobie brown #spider manager #mlp #💌 #summerposting #punk chai brothers

[agnesandhilda]

when michael kaiser gets animated he'll hit twitter like the meteor that killed the dinosaurs

#bolo liveblogs #blue lock #bllk #michael kaiser #sorry for posting incessantly about some random soccer manga guy do you still think I'm hot #but I do stand by this. his whole secretly insecure antagonist with a weird gay thing going on with the protag concept #is something that goes over GREAT with a particular subset of anime fans (me. I'm fans) #and that's not even getting into the trans ass rose motif or the self-choking which are calculated to make tumblr queers insane

[nessaiscute]

Zelda: *feels deathly sick* go be with someone you actually prefer, we both know you you're only with me cause you feel pity for me

Link: *feeding her soup* Zel, shut up. we both know im gonna marry you.

#Zelink #trans headcanon #trans zelda #legend of zelda #link #zelda #botw #totk #when the hormones kick in zelda gets insecure #link is normally paitent with her #but sometimes shes really silly and he has to remind her of his feelings

[uncanny-tranny]

At this point, gender nonconformity is about what the person says their experience is.

If a woman with a beard or a man with lipstick and a mustache says they're gender nonconforming, then they are! If a woman with short hair or a man with long hair says they aren't, they aren't! And that's not even getting into the awesome nonbinary, abinary, genderqueer, intersex, and general genderfuckery that may both be and not be conforming.

So much of what is even considered gender conforming or gender nonconforming is based on a world of exclusion. When we start defining one's conformity with whether they fit into white cishetero perisex standards or not, we play into the idea that there's only a very narrow window of what is considered worthy of time and thought.

#gender nonconformity #gnc #queer #like. for instance a native man who keeps long hair might be considered GNC by white standards but for him it's absolutely not nonconformit #there's an aspect of white supremacy that silences everything else while saying that other culture's silence is indicative of whiteness... #...being 'correct' or 'moral' or 'neutral' #and as somebody who's trans and last i checked white i have my own thoughts from my own experiences #like how i don't consider myself to really be a GNC man. i'm just. man+ #i'm a weird concoction of weird soup that tastes like a man but if it were Wrong #and i just don't see that as not conforming to manhood like it is seperate. i see it as irrevocably linked TO manhood #it is others who have excluded and exiled me from manhood because of *their* understanding of me and how i 'fit in' in cissexism #while i will never ever say i know what it's like to not be white i will say these conversations that PoC have started have been INVALUABLE #i am forever grateful to have been extended the patience and faith to listen in on the experiences of people... #...who are racialized in terms of gender and how they do/don't 'fit in' with often white supremacist views on gender/dynamics #may have made a post like this years back but. eh. arrest me officer i will not back down #i've been more and more 'gnc' as i go into my transition and i don't see it as nonconformity but as an outlet for my masculinity #which is why i'm not insecure about my crafts and creations. because it is coming from a male whether or not it's considered 'manly' #i have little to *no place* in cissexist society so why should i put any stakes into if they ~accept~ me #made this post while jamming out to skyrim's tavern OST (paused my game to write this) #why the HELL does the skyrim tavern music have to go SO HARD. i NEED to slam down BARRELS of mead while listening to this istg #i don't even LIKE honey so i haven't tried mead but. for skyrim i would.

[zipper-zipp]

(If you could reblog for a bigger range of answers, that'd be really cool!)

#trans men #trans #transgender #transmasc #trans boy #this is also just based on personal insecurity #Proper noun #like zipper

[time-slink]

For drawing requests, anything Tango of the Tek variety?? Perhaps special edition dungeon master or create mod redstone man??

frosty man!! + speedpaint under the cut for funsies :)

MAY BE MILD FLASHING

#my art #asks #art asks #tangotek #sometimes i’m insecure abt my speedpaints bc i don’t typically like. have a plan? #so i do a lot of fucking around and finding out lol #but hope it’s fun to see my process! #trans flag colors unintentional but hey it’s cool. i just liked the pink

[inky-goddess]

fuck it. transition timeline face reveal.

Transmasc Nonbinary transition timeline. not on hrt yet. I finally feel confident enough in my appearance to make a face reveal and transition timeline so i decided to make them the same post.

First picture of me is from I think 2015 or 2016, second picture was taken today.

🏳️‍⚧️

#crow.txt #im actually really scared to post this #not cause i think i'll be banned just out of the fact that while i am more confident in my appearance im still very insecure #trans #transgender #transition timeline #the peace signs kinda make me look more awkward than i am...actually i probably am that awkward #trans rights #transmasc #nonbinary #transmasc nonbinary #lgbtq

[lycanthropicture]

btw top surgery scars that are very visible and red and purple and wide and raised are extremely hot and cool and beautiful and anyone who tells u differently is a fucking dumbass piece of shit that should go throw themselves into a volcano. furthermore we should lick each others top surgery scars. thank you.

#it took me so long to love my top surgery scars but now i think theyre so sick #but surgeons and other trans ppl will tell u that the goal is for them to be as invisible as possible #and those ppl are setting most of us up to feel insecure and shitty #and you shouldnt ever feel shitty abt ur top surgery scars. #top surgery should be beautiful and liberating and wonderful #and no one else gets to tell u ur body is imperfect judt bc its not the thing THEY want it to be #ur scars are sexy . forever #kiss me now

[lilac-multifandom-multishipper]

transfem vil: broke

gender-fluid vil: woke

transmasc vil: bespoke

#ngl i could see any of these #transfem vil doesn’t really work with the point of vil’s story but i understand why someone would say that #gender-fluid vil has a special place in my heart and is probably how i would write him just because. it works. #but TRANSMASC VIL. dude. it makes his dynamic with epel and his choice to present feminine most of the time SO much more interesting!! #like. okay so we can all agree that epel is transmasc too right? right. he’s a baby trans guy. vil is his trans therapist. #his mentor in transness. so vil is teaching epel to be less insecure about appearing feminine. he’s helping epel become more comfortable wi #and teaching him how to take care of himself. fuck yes i love that #ok well that was my essay thx for reading this far :3 #twisted wonderland #twst #twst wonderland #vil shoenheit #disney twst #disney twisted wonderland #twst vil #twisted wonderland vil #vil twst #vil schoenheit #twst headcanons #vil twisted wonderland

[allurasrealm]

maybe I'm stupid but the way some people have been suggesting for Marie to just tell Jordan to turn into their femme form before having a romantic moment rubs me the wrong way.

don't get me wrong I get that people are confused but Jordan being in their masc form every time they are having those moments with Marie because of insecurities were already addressed and I don't think this is something that will be resolved in a few episodes. and I do want them to have a talk about it so bad but i actually like that they are taking their time with it.

I also think some people don't get the memo that this isn't a sapphic relationship, queer yes, but not sapphic soooo yeah.

Jordan's journey is about getting to the point where they don't feel pressured to turn into a specific form to please others so suggesting that Marie tell them to turn into their femme form seems to me that it would contribute to the issue more. to me that wouldn't Marie any better than Jordan's first girlfriend.

they should talk yes. Marie should tell Jordan that they don't have to turn into a specific form with her because she simply likes them as a person but definitely not in the way some people have been suggesting.

I guess all Marie can do at that point is just be there for them and be supportive. give Jordan time and space to be more confident.

#and maybe I'm crazy too #but it's in one of those instances where i feel like ppl's biases jump out #too many people casually expressing how they basically like one form more than the other #abt a trans character who has expressed several times how insecure they feel bc of such behavior #it's also ok to realize that a character isn't meant to represent you #you don't have to force your experience on them #just because they are part of a minority group #anyways we need more mariejordan #s2 please don't let me down #limoreau