#⌜╳ ┊ WEARING HER VERY SINS LIKE STARS | ATTIRE

[daisychvins]

tag dump !

#⌜╳ ┊ WEARING HER VERY SINS LIKE STARS | ATTIRE #⌜╳ ┊ A VERSATILE MIND IN A RESTLESS GENERATION | MUSE #⌜╳ ┊ THERE WERE GIRLS WHO WOULD TEAR YOU APART WITH THEIR LIPS | WORDS #⌜╳ ┊ THE FRESHNESS OF HER CHEEKS WAS A GOSSAMER PROJECTION | VANITY

[kimvvantae]

everlasting • jjk

➜ being able to love the same person forever is a blessing given from the heavens. to you, however, eternity has become a curse. 

pairing: jungkook x (f) reader

genre: angst • reincarnation au

warnings: a slight, non-explicit insinuation of sex. subtle mentions of violence. probably historical inaccuracy. also, suffering. lots of suffering, actually.

word count: 18k

rating: pg-13

anon requested: a jungguk fic where him and the reader never work out in any life time like they’ll be “maybe we’ll be together in the next life time” yk I don’t know if I’m making sense 🥺 but then in the last one they end up being together.

➜  this is part of the 1st anniversary event. check out masterlist in bio for more of my works!

× 1401 ×

"You look absolutely lovely!" your mother chirps happily, clapping her hands together. "The most beautiful bride I've ever seen!"

All of the maids agree, making comments on the dress you wear. Some of them are kneeled down around you, making adjustments on the dress and veil. You look at your reflection, holding the delicate fabric with care. You can't disagree with them; indeed, the dress is beautiful. 

"Put a smile on this face, darling." Your mother continues, coming closer to where you stand. She caresses your cheek affectionately. "It is your wedding day!" 

You look at your mother. She smiles widely. If someone that doesn't know her looked at this situation, they'd think she's a caring mother.

But you do know her.

You know the expertly crafted smile that adorns her lips.

You know that there is no happiness at all reflected on her eyes - only the coldness and superiority you're already used to.

You see that what she said was actually a warning. At least pretend to be happy. Don't you disrespect your fiance.

That's all she cares about: appearances. Reputation. Wealth and power. Even though this is the woman that brought you to life, you can't help but wonder if she has ever cared for you at least once.

You say nothing and look back at your reflection.

"May you all leave me alone?" You ask in a low and dead tone. It doesn't even sound like you.

The maids promptly move out of the room without muttering a word, bowing respectfully before leaving. Your mother, however, doesn't move.

"I said may you all leave me alone?" You repeat, your voice louder and harder. Now that you're alone with her, the façade fades and she finally shows her true self: dead eyes, an expression that somehow always conveys aggressiveness. She opens her mouth to say something that will probably hurt your feelings, but you don't let her even start the sentence. You had enough of her. "You already got what you wanted, mother. At least leave me by myself in my last moments of freedom."

The woman glares at you for a moment, then nods. You see the faint shadow of a smirk on her lips. She's enjoying this. She likes to see that you finally bent to her will after all these years - and she doesn't care that this is killing you inside. "Very well." she says, at least once keeping any snarky comment to herself. After giving one last look at you - and in this quick moment you notice that no, she actually does not think you're the most beautiful bride she has ever seen - and finally leaves the room.

You stand in front of the mirror, all alone.

If you could, you would have cried. But you don't have enough strength to cry anymore. The tears seem to have dried out; you feel empty and cold on the inside. The beautiful (and uncomfortable) attire you wear now does not match your blank expression. 

In a few minutes, you'll be attending your own wedding… but deep down, it feels like a funeral.

You feel powerless. You see how gullible you were. Why did you even think you could avoid your fate anyway? There has never been an option to you; there has never been how to escape. You were foolish. You dreamed too high. You should have figured that dreams never take anyone anywhere. 

You asked your mother to enjoy your last moments of freedom by yourself, but… you were never really free. The shackles of destiny have chained you ever since you were born. 

There is no escape.

"You look beautiful, Highness." 

You freeze. The sad, quiet voice floats to your ears, the voice that belongs to the person you love the most-

"Jungkook," you whisper.

You see his reflection in the mirror. He stands by the door, perfect posture as always, hands behind his back. His blank expression might be mistaken by apathy, but you know these dark eyes far too well. You've seen them from up close multiple times, you've stared at them for seemingly endless hours - eyes that used to look back at you with nothing but gentleness and affection, now hold a type of sadness and grief you have never seen before.

"Your father asked me to accompany you," he continues on his usual formal tone. He's visibly trying so hard not to break…

You turn around and face him. The tears that seemed to have dried out come back, welling up your eyes. "I'm sorry." It's all you can say in a weak, small voice. You feel sorry in a way that hurts your chest as if you've been stabbed right in the heart. The sadness in his eyes… this is enough to make you want to die. "I-I tried everything…"

"There's nothing to apologize for, Y/N." Jungkook says with a soft voice - the tone he'd use whenever you were finally alone and away from any suspicious ears, when you could love each other in the silence of the night, your secret being kept by the stars above. The smallest of smiles adorns his lips, but there's no happiness reflected in it. "We knew this would happen someday. We were never meant to be."

His words almost feels like physical pain. You step closer and put your hands over his chest, desperate. "But I love you!" You whisper, your voice breaking as tears start to fall. 

Jungkook lifts his hand and touches your cheek gently, wiping your tears with his thumb. You mean it with the bottom of your heart. You love Jungkook. You love him with every fiber of your being. You silently curse the Universe for making you walk this path, for making you be born a princess and making Jungkook be a knight. No one would never let you be together the way you want to. No one around you even believes in love.

"I love you too," he whispers back. "And I always will." 

A small smile once again appears on his lips. The smile he usually shows when he wants to comfort you. 

This time, though, nothing in the world will be able to comfort your bleeding heart.

"Maybe… maybe we'll meet in our next life. A life when we'll be in different circumstances." Even though Jungkook himself says these words, you see that it's just a sad hope - because right now, there's no way out. All that exists is pain and a dark future ahead of you, married with a prince you have never seen, a man you don't love and never will.

Still, you and Jungkook hold onto this hope - this last shared dream - tightly.

"Maybe we'll be together in our next life." He says as a single tear trickles down his cheek.

× 1642 ×

Life in the convent is good.

Ever since you decided to willingly dedicate your life to God, you see nothing but light and happiness. All of the nuns became your family. Every day, you pray for the Lord, plead that He will forgive your sins, read the Holy Scriptures. You feed the animals, take care of the plantation. You help your sisters on the kitchen; later on, you'd usually distribute food for the poor and unfortunate. 

The routine is repetitive, but familiar and enjoyable. You love your sisters. You love to help people. You love to serve the Lord. This is the life He chose for you.

You are blessed.

But…

Recently, there is a feeling that has been distracting you from your life of serving.

Not a feeling… a person.

You have prayed for endless nights, pleading for God to forgive you, pleading for Virgin Mary's help and guidance. You should eradicate this feeling. You must have no distractions on your life of serving and humility; you must not betray the trust that the Lord has on you…

But every time you hear his suave voice, every time you see him entering the convent, your heart still beats fast. 

Usually, men are not allowed inside the convent. But he is not just any man. The young priest started to come two years ago to lead the mass, and ever since, you started developing this wrong feeling. You started to look at him far too much. You saw his kindness, you admired his wisdom. Soon, you realized that you were hoping for his arrivals. You and him barely even talked, but when you did, it always felt as if you were swept off your feet.

This is wrong.

You swore to live a life of abnegation. You shouldn't crave for anyone's company except God's. But every night, before you closed your eyes, his face came to your mind. You felt happy at any opportunity to talk to him; sometimes, you'd watch him from afar as he talked to the mother superior, your heart fluttering every time he'd smile.

This is unforgivable.

But you can't help it.

That's why one day in the early morning, so early that almost all of the sisters are still asleep, you walk alone to the chapel.

You know he is here; that's why your heart starts beating faster. Quietly, you enter the small booth and kneel down, put your hands together and lower your head respectfully.

"Bless me, priest, for I have sinned." you start timidly.

You hear him saying a prayer, what makes a shiver run down your spine. You can't see him, and he can't see you - and you're grateful for it. You wouldn't be able to look at him for too long.

After he finishes, it's your time to confess. It's hard to do so. You intertwine your own fingers and gulp.

"I… I am behaving inappropriately, priest." Your voice is fragile. Hesitant.

"What makes you think this, sister?" He asks.

You gulp yet again. "I… I developed feelings for someone. I know it's wrong. I have been asking for God's help, I have been trying to forget it… but this feeling won't go away."

The priest stays silent for a moment. Does he know you're talking about him? No, that's impossible…

"You've taken the first step, sister." He says in a reassuring way. "You have been doing your best to avoid these feelings. God for sure will listen to you and help you. He knows you're trying."

You nod, even though you know he can't see it. You should stop it right here. You should thank him and leave.

But you can't.

That's why you keep talking.

"But, priest… deep down, I don't think that my feelings are impure. I… I don't have any carnal feelings for him. I admire him and I crave for his company. I just wish to talk to him and… and to hear him. I just want to be with him."

The priest falls in deep silence.

He's the only man you ever keep in touch with. He knows that you're talking about him.

When you hear him calling your name softly, your eyes widen.

"I understand how you feel." He whispers, and suddenly, it feels as if he is confessing, not you. Your heart beats so fast that you're scared it may stop; your palms start sweating. What does he mean…? "I really do. But… both of us chose this life. We can't go back on our word."

You almost gasp. The priest not only understands - he feels the same. You can't even control your own emotions right now; you feel euphoria, confusion, excitement, and-

And sadness.

Because you know that you shouldn't be feeling what you feel. This is forbidden for you - and the priest is right. You chose it. You decided to live this life.

You can't go back on your word.

"I understand." You say quietly, unable to hide the sadness and guilt in your voice.

He doesn't say anything for a long moment. You can't help but feel the tears trickling down your cheeks. This hurts. It hurts more than you ever thought it would.

"Maybe…" the priest whispers, so quiet that you can barely hear. "Maybe if we had another life… this would be possible."

You nod sadly.

Maybe in another life… 

In a life that you wouldn't be you and him wouldn't be him.

× 1803 ×

"He's looking at you," your younger sister says, giggling.

Your eyes widen and you immediately pass your hand through your hair discreetly, trying to look less like a scarecrow. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, he is. He has been staring for quite a long time." She confirms, still smirking in a knowing way.

You gulp and try to focus on your current task again - which is wash the clothes, kneeled next to the flowing river. Your own clothes are barely dirty rags, your hair is probably a mess. You look nothing like a respectable lady.

What is he doing here anyway?

You shake your head. "I don't care," you lie to yourself, scrubbing the white sheet against a rock with more strength than you should. "He is an odd man. An odd man that does odd things."

"You like him."

"I don't!" You gasp when you realize that, perhaps, you said this way too loud. "I don't." You repeat with a controlled voice this time. "He is our boss. We shouldn't even think anything like this about him."

"Why not? He's handsome!" She exclaims. "He's the most handsome man in the entire town! Besides, he stares at you way too much."

"Stop it." You warn your annoying younger sister. "You know very well that people like him and people like us don't get involved."

People like Jeon Jungkook are rich. They can afford the most expensive types of fabric, the most gracious and strong horses, the most exotic types of tea. The Jeon family owns the small town you live in. His father is part of the government - which means he is the law itself. Everybody respects the Jeons… well, everybody fear the Jeons. 

Meanwhile, people like you work for people like him. You and your family live in a small house inside the Jeon's enormous farm; you, your siblings and your mother work as maids and cooks, while your father and your brothers take care of the animals. All of your clothes are reused and you have never tasted anything other than cheap tea. You don't ride any pure race horse because Master Jeon doesn't like the idea of his unworthy servants touching any of his awarded animals.

Yes, people like you and him definitely don't get involved.

That's why you are mad at yourself. You shouldn't feel nervous whenever Jungkook is around. Sure, he is handsome… maybe way too handsome for his own good. But he is nothing but a petty rich boy. He's exactly the type of man you should avoid.

"You're getting quite old, aren't you, sister?" The annoying girl continues, side eyeing you maliciously. "You should be searching for a husband already. Otherwise, soon no man will want you."

You don't say anything for a few seconds, still scrubbing that sheet as if the poor piece of fabric had cursed you. Your sister is somehow right. Most of your friends are already married - some of them are pregnant. You know you should hurry and start a family. It's not as if you want to be single forever.

But… you also don't want to marry any man. As foolish as it sounds, you're still waiting for someone to love.

Your mother says that you dream too much. You should stop reading those books and come back to reality, she said. You will not be young and beautiful forever. You should give Seokjin a chance. He is a good man, has a decent job and already showed interest in you.

Most of your friends told you the same.

But you heart does not flutter when you see Seokjin.

At least not the way it does when…

Stop.

You shake your head vehemently. "You should stop talking and start working," you say, throwing another wet sheet on the girl aggressively. She gasps and complains a "hey!"

You take the soap bar and start washing another sheet, still shaking your head as if to free yourself from these thoughts. 

But you can't help but lift your gaze for a quick moment.

Jungkook is standing there, caressing his horse's head. His eyes are not on the animal, but on you instead. He's way too far, so you can't see the details of his face, but he clearly has a small smile on his lips.

A smirk.

He didn't possibly hear your conversation with your sister, right? That's impossible. He's too far.

The young man shakes his head slightly and finally starts to guide the horse away by the reins, heading to the stables.

It takes a long time for your heart to beat at a normal pace again.

You wonder how is it possible that such a small family can dirty so many clothes.

The Jeon family isn't that big, but every week you're gifted with a ton of clothes to wash. And they're not just any clothes: Mrs. Jeon already made very clear that all of their clothes are made of the finest and richest types of fabric, and because of this, you had to be extremely careful when washing them. She also likes to point out how a single dress of hers or of her daughter is far more expensive than you'll ever be able to pay. This is enough of a warning for you to not damage them (even though sometimes you really want to). 

Washing the clothes isn't an easy task: you have to carry all of them in a basket to the river, and the process of scrubbing them against the rock is tiring and may take several hours. Many times, you're forced to sit under the scorching sun. After this, you have to carry them back, put them to dry on the sun, and then iron them to perfection - what, again, isn't an easy task; the iron is heavy and it is quite dangerous to use. The scar on your hand is a painful reminder of this. You have to repeat this process every week, just because your dear bosses can't wear the same dress twice - which doesn't even make sense. You have exactly three dresses, some skirts and some shirts. Even though your job gets you dirty all the time, you do your best to stay clean as much as possible.

If those bitches had to wash their clothes themselves, I'm sure they wouldn't wear so many.

Today, though, you're having more work than usual. None of your sisters or your mom could help you (usually, this is too tough to be done by one person); the Jeons will be holding a birthday party for their son, which means they were too busy cleaning the gigantic house to help you. You got up earlier than usual and came to the river, knowing that the sooner you'd start, the sooner you'd finish.

You completely lost sight of time, too focused on washing all the items from the basket. You have to stop from time to time to let your arms rest. You're sure that, soon, your biceps will be more muscular than your older brother's. You exhale heavily and wipe the sweat from your forehead with the back of your hand; at least, this is the last skirt.

That's when you hear a soft cough somewhere near.

You turn your head and gasp.

He is standing there. Way closer than the usual.

You immediately avoid his gaze.

"Mr. Jeon," you say. "You scared me."

"I apologize." Jungkook says, smiling. It's annoying how he always has this smile on his lips. It's annoying how he always looks handsome, it doesn't matter what he's wearing.

It's annoying how your heart starts beating faster and you feel a heat creeping on your neck.

"Did you need something, sir?" You ask, grabbing the skirt you've been scrubbing for the past few minutes. You try your hardest to pretend you're not affected by his presence. "Unfortunately, I can't help you now, but I'm sure that my mother and my sisters can."

"No, I don't need anything," he says, shaking his hands dismissively. "I'm just watching you." He tilts his head. "It seems like a tiring work."

You try your hardest not to roll your eyes. You bet, idiot. "It sure is a tiring work, sir."

"Oh, there's no need to call me 'sir'. You can call me Jungkook." His voice sounds annoyingly lighthearted.

"I can't. It would be inappropriate, sir." You reply, focusing your gaze on your hands as you pass more soap on the skirt, trying not to think about how he's annoyingly close. 

"Why?" He asks as if he doesn't already know why.

"You're my boss, sir. That's why I call you sir, sir." 

This time, you weren't able to hide the aggressiveness in your voice.

Jungkook frowns. At least he realized how his presence is unwanted… and he looks confused. As if he had never met a woman that didn't fawn over him.

Well… he probably didn't. 

You start to scrub the skirt again, completely ignoring his existence. With the corner of your eye, you can see Jungkook shifting uncomfortably. He's definitely not used to be ignored.

You have to learn one thing or two, rich boy.

After rinsing and wringing the skirt tightly, you sigh in relief. At least this is done. You put it back on the basket and get up, ready to walk back to where the clotheslines are.

"Oh, wait," you hear Jungkook exclaiming. Your heart almost stops beating when he rushes to your side. "This looks heavy. Let me help you."

"No!" You blink, realizing that perhaps you were a little too rude. "I mean- this is not necessary, sir. I can carry it by myself."

"I can't see a lady carrying so much weight and do nothing. Please, let me help."

You hate that smile. God, you hate it.

When he extends his arms, ready to grab the basket from your hands, you step away and look at him with worry and seriousness on your features.

"Sir, please. If your mother sees you helping me, she will not like it."

Jungkook stares at you with confusion.

Are you stupid?, you feel the urge to ask. Doesn't he know his own mother?

"She won't do anything, Y/N." Your eyes widen. You didn't know that Jungkook knew your name. "I can deal with her. Now, please, let me carry this. I just want to be polite."

You stare at him for a few seconds. Well, at least it seems that he really wants to help. You sigh, giving in, and nod. "Very well," you say.

He smiles again. He really has a mesmerizing smile.

When Jungkook takes the basket, he frowns and looks surprised. "This is heavier than I expected."

You asked for it!

You start walking side by side in an uncomfortable silence. You're sure that Jungkook thought you'd be happy or pleased, and he looks confused that you're clearly not. You don't want to be close to him. You don't want to see him smiling and trying to be polite. You don't want to feel your stomach twirling in excitement just because he's close or because he knows your name.

"Do you carry all this by yourself every time?" Jungkook asks at some point.

"I usually have my sisters' help. Sometimes we carry three or four baskets."

Jungkook lifts his eyebrows. Surprised? Can you tell your mother and sister to stop being dirty pigs that give us so much work, then?

Silence reigns above you again. It's painful. This farm is enormous, so it'll take some minutes of walking to arrive there. You don't think you'll be able to bear this.

"Actually," Jungkook starts all of sudden, sounding quiet and… hesitant. "I want to invite you to my birthday party tomorrow. I'd be really glad if you came."

He looks at you and smiles timidly.

This time, you can't hold back a huff.

Jungkook looks confused again.

"Are you serious?" You also forget to be polite.

"Of course I'm serious."

You smirk, but there's no hint of happiness on your smile. Your eyes look so mad that Jungkook is taken aback.

"Thank you for the invitation, sir," you say as you take the basket from his hands forcefully. "but servants are not allowed to attend parties."

You walk away at a fast pace. Jungkook at least has the decency to not follow you.

What is he thinking?!

His mother would kill you if she saw you there. You have no dress for such occasion; you'd be a joke. Imagine, you - a servant in a party where only the high society of this town would attend!

It's so ridiculous that you get mad.

You know what Jungkook wanted with this. You may be a dreamer, but you're not stupid. Men like him are used to seduce poor girls just for fun; they fool them, make them think that they love them, make them think that they're princes and that they came to give those girls a better life. But it all ends when they have enough of them or when they find a rich girl to marry. It's not as if he had any type of true interest in you. 

You're angry and sad.

People like you and people like Jungkook are not meant to be.

Two weeks have passed by when you meet him again.

As usual, you're kneeled down by the river, scrubbing a sheet against the surface of the rock. Since today there are less clothes to wash than the usual, you decided to come by yourself. As it always seems to happen, you got too immersed in your task to pay attention to your surroundings. This time, though, you have a reason to be so inattentive.

Your friends told you that Seokjin is planning to propose to you.

Seokjin is a good man. It seems that he genuinely cares about you. He's also very good-looking and polite. Any other woman would be happy to marry him.

But you don't want to marry someone just because of their looks.

At the same time, if you don't get married soon, you'll get a bad reputation.

What to do? You have no idea. Perhaps you should forget your own dreams and start listening to your mother…

"Good afternoon."

You gasp, startled, and the soap bar almost slips from your hands.

It's Jungkook again.

"Why must you always be so sneaky, sir?" You say, putting your hand over your chest.

Jungkook doesn't say anything - he just looks at you and the clothes instead, eyebrows furrowed. Were you really so inattentive or is Jungkook this silent?

He then pushes the sleeves of his shirt and kneels down by your side.

You widen your eyes as you see him taking one sheet from the basket.

"W-What are you doing?" You're frozen in place.

"I'm helping." He takes the soap bar from your hands. When his fingers touches yours, you shiver.

"Sir- there's no need-"

"I want to."

"What if someone sees you?!" 

Jungkook looks around. "There's nobody here. I doubt that someone will come."

You stare at him, jaw dropped, as Jungkook passes soap on the sheet. You notice he's trying to imitate your movements - except he's being much more aggressive.

You come back to your senses. "No. Stop!"

You put your hand over his, making him stop.

Your eyes meet.

You feel goosebumps.

"I-If you keep scrubbing like this, you'll end up ripping it off," you stutter, taking your hand off of his. "Don't put so much strength. Be more gentle."

Jungkook nods. You watch, too shocked to say anything, as he does what you said.

Silence falls over you two - but it's not an uncomfortable silence this time. You still can't tell exactly what's happening. For a while, you two just keep scrubbing clothes, the sound of the flowing river reigning.

Until you can't hold back a giggle.

"What?" He immediately asks. You shake your head, avoiding his gaze.

"I never thought I'd see a man washing clothes, sir." You admit. "It's quite interesting."

Jungkook shrugs. "I just didn't want to see you doing all this by yourself." He has to stop for a moment and take a deep breath - way sooner than you usually do. "This is more tiring than I thought it would be."

You giggle again. "Now, imagine doing this more than once per week, sir."

He frowns his eyebrows. After more scrubbing, he lifts the sheet with both hands and looks at you. Your stomach jumps in a funny way. His eyes are big and round in an innocent expression. "Is it clean now?"

"Not even close." 

Jungkook exhales and tilts his head in an adorable way. Why everything he does makes your heart flutter like this? 

"Let's work more, then." He says, taking the soap bar again.

You don't know why he is even trying.

But you can't say you're not enjoying it.

"What do you mean, you don't need help?" Your sister asks, completely confused.

You avoid her gaze and take the basket on your hands absently. "I can do this by myself today. Besides, you were a little sick, weren't you? You should rest."

"And since when do you care?"

"I always cared." You glare at her, offended. "I'm leaving now before you make me change my mind." 

Before she can say anything else, you walk out of the house carrying the heavy basket.

Of course I'm doing this because I care, you think, frowning. Of course. She had a fever. She has to rest today.

Of course I'm not doing this because I hope that Jungkook will show up again.

Of course not.

A strange heat reaches your neck.

You still don't know why the Jeon insisted on helping you. Any man would feel ashamed to do this type of work. Yet, Jungkook stayed with you until both of you finished washing all the items in the basket. 

He did not complain. He did not make any type of bad comment about you.

In fact, he didn't even try to court you. He just… talked to you.

This, itself, is already surprising.

You're used to being treated like nothing by people on his level. Rich people think that poor people aren't even people in the first place. Besides, it wouldn't be the first time a rich man tried to get under your skirt. Jungkook, however, was respectful all the time. He didn't treat you as if you were a brainless peasant. You talked about many things. Being around him didn’t feel overwhelming… it was comfortable.

You know you shouldn’t be craving for his company, but you do. After that day, every week you see yourself finding an excuse to go to the river alone, hoping that he will come - and he actually comes to help you. Jungkook learned how to wash clothes properly really fast. Every time he comes, you finish all the work pretty quickly, what disappoints you deep down, because you want more opportunities to spend time with him.

If back then you just felt attracted by Jungkook’s appearance… well, now you’re starting to feel something more.

Even though there’s a voice in your mind yelling that this won’t end up well.

You arrive at the usual spot by the river and place the basket on the floor, getting ready to  work. Unconsciously, you keep looking at your surroundings, hoping that his figure will peek in the horizon at any time. You already feel your heart beating rapidly with nervousness. He might not want to come today. He might have things to do. Why would he even want to come anyway? This is ridiculous-

“Searching for me, Y/N?” You scream, completely startled, when a voice says right by your side.

Jungkook laughs joyfully, satisfied with your reaction. You glare at him. “What’s your problem, sir?”

“It’s not my fault if you get scared so easily.” He shrugs, faking an innocent expression. He sits by your side and crosses his legs. Something you noticed recently is that Jungkook doesn’t exactly act like a gentleman - he walks around barefoot, laughs loudly, sits with crossed legs like he’s doing right now, and the stranger of all: helps a woman washing clothes. He definitely doesn’t act like all the other man you know. You always knew he was an odd man, but day after day it gets more surprising. “Did you miss me?”

“Certainly not.” you roll your eyes. “I was hoping that you wouldn’t come to bother me.”

What a liar.

“Sure.” Jungkook side eyes you suspiciously. “I can leave if you want… but then, I won’t give you the present I brought with me.”

“What?” you look at him, feeling your heart race. Did he bring you a present…?

“As I said, I’m won’t give you the present… unless you ask me to stay.” He says in a childish manner, a teasing glint in his eyes. He starts to get up as if to leave.

“Wait.” You call. Your pride screams in pain. Jungkook stops midway and waits for you to say something. You roll your eyes again (your eyes tend to roll a lot when he’s around). “Stay, please.”

He grins widely and sits down again, reaching for something in a bag behind him. “Since you told me you were tired of reading the same books, I thought you’d like this.”

Jungkook hands you a book happily.

Your breath almost gets caught on your throat.

“Sir, I… I can’t accept this,” you say, although you want to take the book.

“Why not?” He looks confused.

“B-Because… well… where did you take this book from?”

“From the library in my house.”

“What if they notice that one book is missing? What if someone caughts me with it?” You say, already feeling the fear underneath your skin.

“Did you see the size of that library? Do you know how many books are there?” he lifts his eyebrows. Yes, you know the Jeon’s gigantic library. You’ve dreamed of having a library like this many times. There are hundreds of books in it. “They will never notice that one book is missing. Besides, no one reads anything in that house. My mother just keeps the library for fashion.” Jungkook then takes your hand with his own - what makes a warmth spread through your body - and puts the book over it, the most beautiful smile on his lips. “There’s nothing to worry about, Y/N. Please, accept it.”

You stare at the book.  A strange sensation fills up your heart.

Jungkook remembered your conversation and paid attention to what you said. You are, indeed, tired of reading the same three books you own over and over again - books are expensive, your family can’t waste any money with anything other than food. Besides… most people usually don’t approve your liking for books. Your mother herself has already said that you shouldn’t even have learned how to read; she says that a woman must only know how to cook, how to clean and how to respect her husband. 

It’s the first time someone takes your interests seriously. This is the most thoughtful present you have ever received.

You can’t hold back a smile.

“I… I don’t know what to say.” you confess in a shy whisper. “Thank you so much, Jungkook.”

He gasps.

“You said my name.” He smiles widely. “It’s the first time you say my name.”

You feel your cheeks heating up. “D-Don’t get used to it.”

Jungkook laughs again, and this time, you laugh as well.

This strange sensation in your heart seems to be overflowing.

This won’t end up well.

“Do you know how to ride a horse?”

You frown, eyes focused on the shirt between your hands. “Not really, sir.”

“Would you like to learn?”

You stop and stare at him.

There’s that glint in Jungkook’s eyes - the glint that says he’s planning something.

“I confess I would like to, but I don’t have time. Nor permission.” You say, looking at the shirt again.

“Why? Your brothers ride the horses.” Again, it seems that Jungkook doesn’t know his own family.

“My brothers and my father are farmers. They need to ride the horses to take care of the herd.”

“Alright. But you want to learn, don’t you?”

You stop again and look at him suspiciously.

“What do you mean, sir?”

He smiles in a playful way, almost like a child. “I just thought that you would want to take a break from all the work.”

“Sir, I can’t take breaks.” You exclaim. Jungkook doesn’t understand that you can’t do whatever you want. “I have to work. What if someone caughts me?”

“You’ll be with me.”

“And? I’m sure nobody would do anything to you, but I’d certainly get punished.” After so long, you feel intimate enough to be a little rude to him. “You’ve already been very kind to me, giving me all those books. That’s enough, sir. I’m thankful.”

“But reading books isn’t nearly as fun as riding a horse.” His stubbornness can be annoying at times. “Come on, Y/N. Just once!”

“No. My family will notice that I’m taking too long to finish.”

“We almost finished way sooner than usual. Nobody will notice.”

“Sir-”

“Please?”

You freeze when he takes both of your hands in his.

Your heartbeat increases, your eyes widen. Jungkook doesn’t touch you so often - he is very polite - but when he does, your body reacts immediately. Being close to him can be a torture sometimes. He is good, intelligent, funny… and extremely handsome. You look forward to meeting him every week. At times, you’re way slower than usual, just to spend more time with him. 

Your feelings for him have grown quickly like fire spreading in the woods.

This won’t end up well, the voice insists to whisper on your ears angrily.

Jungkook has his big pleading eyes staring at you. 

This won’t end up well. This won’t end up well. This won’t end up well. This won’t end up-

“Alright,” you sigh, giving in. Jungkook giggles excitedly. “But just today! And not for too long.”

Jungkook helps you to get up and guides you to his horse: a beautiful all-brown animal, tall and strong. This horse is probably healthier than me, you think. Master Jeon values his awarded horses a lot… more than his own family.

"Come. He's a very calm animal. He won't hurt you." Jungkook encourages, offering his hand for you to take. You look around, worried that someone might be watching. You're glad that this farm is so incredibly big and that your usual spot by the river is so far from the plantations, the main house and the stables where everyone usually stays.

At the same time, sheer excitement bubbles inside of you.

You take Jungkook's hand.

He helps you to sit on the horse's back. "Stay calm," Jungkook advises. "He can feel if you're nervous or not."

"I'm not nervous," you state, holding the reins the way you've always seen your brothers doing. 

He keeps giving you instructions before guiding the horse slowly for a while. The animal is very obedient; it follows Jungkook's commands without complaining. 

"Do you think you can guide it by yourself now?" He asks. You nod confidently.

"Yes."

Jungkook steps away.

He can't hide his utter shock when he sees you riding the animal as if you were born doing so.

The horse obeys you easily as you guide him around. Soon, you feel brave enough to ride faster. The speed, the wind on your face and hair, the excitement of doing something you shouldn't - all of this makes you laugh at the top of your lungs.

Perhaps Jungkook was right when he said that riding horses is funnier than reading books…

"I have to admit, I'm impressed," he says when you stop by his side again. "You didn't even need help."

"Well, I've been watching my father doing this my whole life." You shrug. 

"But why did you stop?"

"Because this is enough for today." You say even though it disappoints you. "I don't want to put myself in danger. Can you help me…?"

Jungkook lifts his arms, ready to pick you up. You put your hand on his shoulders.

You lose balance and almost fall. Jungkook catches your body in time.

You freeze.

His hands are firmly placed on each side of your waist; your hands are on his chest. You're way too close.

Your faces, millimeters apart.

Dangerously close.

He's so close that you can feel his breath. So close that you can see every little detail on his face. So close that you feel your whole body heat up. So close that you can feel his heart beat rapidly under your palm.

So close that, if you simply leaned your head forward, your lips would touch.

And you really, really want to.

But you step back. 

"Hm… thank you." You avoid his gaze, embarrassed. You've never been this close to a man before… and Jungkook's not just any man. He's the man that makes your heart beat fast and the man that understands and respects you and the man that doesn't underestimate you. He's the man who you can talk to, who you can laugh with, who always manages to brighten your day.

He is the right man.

But, at the same time, he is the wrong man.

That's why you step back. That's why you walk away with your head lowered.

Because it doesn't matter how much you want it - you and him will never end up well.

This week, Jungkook brought two horses.

You got surprised and excited, but pretended to be angry. I said that I'd do it once, sir!

But here you are - riding by his side.

Jungkook let you ride the same brown horse again, since the animal might be more familiarized with you. You completely lost sight of time, too entertained in the feeling of freedom that riding a horse can provide.

You're also lost in Jungkook's beauty.

He looks astonishing: his strong arms, his veiny hands holding the reins with ease. The way his soft hair bounces and waves with the wind. His confident posture. 

You had to stop looking - otherwise you'd fall from the horse.

You're so entertained that you don't care when the sky becomes dark with heavy storm clouds. 

"Sir, it's raining!" You scream so he can hear. Not that you needed to say anything: thunder echoes around you, and the first heavy drops starts falling from the sky. You're worried. Everybody knows that being in an open field under a storm is never a good idea.

"It's too late to try to go back to the house," Jungkook says. "We need coverage!"

Without saying anything else, you follow him down the hill at a fast pace, the heavy rain whipping your faces and bodies. You realize where Jungkook is heading to: the warehouse. You manage to put yourselves and the horses inside of the empty building.

Your heart beats fast with adrenaline. Jungkook laughs, looking at his damp clothes. You're not better than him. Usually, you'd be angry with this situation… but now, all you can do is laugh as well.

"We should pay more attention next time," you say. Your clothes and hair are dripping.

"But it was fun, wasn't it?" Jungkook asks. You shrug and smile. The noise of the wind and the water hitting against the warehouse's ceiling violently is unsettling and loud.

"I love to see you smile."

You freeze.

What…?

Jungkook is looking at you with a sweet smile on his lips. His eyes, however, are clouded with something you've never seen before. It's enough to make your stomach twirl and a shiver run underneath your skin.

He steps closer.

This won't end up well.

This time, though, you don't back away.

You stand firm, gaze locked with his, as Jungkook puts a strand of wet hair behind your ear.

All you can hear is the beating of your heart. All you can see is his face.

This won't end up well.

Jungkook analyzes your features carefully, almost as if he's searching for something.

"I know this might sound strange," he says, his voice almost disappearing between the loud noises of the storm. "But sometimes, when I look at you, I… I feel that I already know you."

"But you know me." You whisper back.

"No. I mean… I mean that it feels like I've known you for a long time. More time than I can remember…"

It confuses you.

But, at the same time, it makes sense.

Being with Jungkook feels… familiar. Almost like a distant childhood memory. Something you can't picture or explain. You just know that it's there; it exists.

Your feelings for him.

This familiarity is still there when Jungkook closes the distance and kisses you; when your lips move slowly, in synchronicity, with raw passion. It feels new but familiar when his hands touch your body and when you feel his warm skin under his clothes. Even though it's the first time, the weight of his body over yours seems familiar. The way your members entangle, your fingers gripping his hair, his lips on your neck, the heat, the sweat, the pleasure.

It feels familiar.

It feels like home. 

And it feels bittersweet. 

Because, deep down… the voice that says that this won't end up well is still echoing.

Something tells you that you should believe it.

"Sister, are you alright?" 

You hold your stomach with one hand and wipe your mouth with the back of the other hand. The horrible taste of vomit washes your mouth.

"Y-Yes. It was probably something I ate-"

More vomit erupts through your lips. Your sister puts her hand on your back and pats it gently. 

"But if it was something you ate, then all of us should be feeling sick as well." She says. "You must be sick. We should call the doctor. I'll tell mom-"

You hold her hand tightly.

"Don't tell mom." You say firmly. "I'm alright."

Your sister frowns, confused. "But, Y/N, you've been feeling unwell for some days. What if it's something serious? What if…"

She blinks rapidly.

"What if…?"

You see the moment her astute eyes gleam with realization.

"Sister… are you…?"

"Am I what?" You ask in a defensive manner - trying to hide your fear.

Her jaw is dropped, eyes widened.

"How could you?!" She half whispers, half screams. You watch as a mix of feelings surface on her eyes; anger, betrayal, confusion, worry. "You're not married yet! What will people say about you when they notice-?!"

"Notice what?!" You don't want to hear the words. If she says it, it'll become real. It can't be real.

"I saw you with him. I saw you with Jungkook."

Freezing fear creeps on you.

"I followed you some days ago and saw you together. Do you think I wouldn't notice that something was wrong? You've been insisting to wash the clothes by yourself for months. Everyone knows you hate to do this!"

You don't know what to say. 

You feel stupid. Desperate. Scared.

You don't even notice when the tears start streaming down your cheeks.

"I don't know what to do." You whisper weakly.

Your sister shakes her head. "Did he propose to you, at least? You must marry him now. It's the only way to regain your honor."

You shake your head. "I… I'll talk to him. I must talk to him today."

The girl swipes her hand over her face as she starts to feel desperate for you. "Why did you let him do this to you, Y/N…?"

"You don't understand." You're quick to say. "We love each other. We… we'll figure out what to do. We'll find a way out."

You know you're just saying this to calm yourself down. You have no idea if you'll figure out what to do. You don't even know what Jungkook's reaction will be when he finds out…

That's the only thing in your mind as you wait for him, leaning under a tree. Your fingers are shaking, your breathing is short and rapid. What if Jungkook abandons me? What will I do? My parents will never forgive me. No one will help me at the town. They'll be ashamed of me and they'll hate me.

You should have figured that this would happen. After all these nights when you sneaked out of your house to meet him…  The tears start falling again, followed by quiet sobs. You destroyed your life. A dishonored woman. A prostitute…

"Y/N, what's wrong?!"

You see Jungkook running to you, worry covering his features the moment he realizes you're crying. He holds your face with both hands. "What happened? Did someone hurt you? Something happened with your family?"

The uncontrollable sobs won't let you speak. Instead, you just let yourself cry as Jungkook hugs you tightly, even though he doesn't understand what's happening.

It takes a long time for you to calm down.

"J-Jungkook…" you step away from him. Your eyes are glued to the floor. You're not brave enough to look at him and see his reaction.

"Yes, darling? What happened?" He asks, voice full of worry and care.

You gulp.

He has to know.

"I-I'm pregnant." 

Silence.

The silence lasts for so long that you think he didn't hear.

You finally have the courage to look up at him…

And you see Jungkook's eyes welled up with tears, the most beautiful smile adorning his lips.

"Pregnant?" He whispers weakly as the first tear trickles down his cheek. "You're pregnant?"

"...yes."

"Am I going to be a father?" 

"Yes."

Jungkook laughs and engulfs you in a hug.

From all the reactions you thought of, this is the one you were least expecting - but that's the one you were secretly hoping for the most. Jungkook hugs you tightly, kisses the top of your head, your forehead, your cheeks, your lips, whispering "I love you"s in between. You're so astonished that you have no reaction at all.

"You made me the happiest man in the world today, Y/N," he grins widely and sniffs. "I'll be a father! You're carrying our child!"

"Are you really happy?" You ask timidly, almost suspicious.

"Why wouldn't I be?! I love you." He holds your face and kisses your lips sweetly. "I love you. God, I love you."

You feel overwhelmed by his words. A smile finally appears on your lips.

"What will we do, Jungkook?" Your voice still sounds weak. "We should get married…"

This is the moment his smile faces away.

His features change in an instant - from utter joy, to deep concern. He frowns and blinks, licks his lips.

"We need to do something." He agrees.

"You must talk to my parents-"

"We need to run away from here."

You gasp.

"Run away? Why?" You ask, confused. "If we get married as soon as possible, people won't notice-"

"No. We need to leave the town. We need to disappear." The hurry and worry in his voice makes you uneasy.

"Jungkook, I have a family. I can't leave them behind."

"Darling, you don't understand," he cups your cheeks again. "My father, he's- he's dangerous. He would never accept our marriage. I don't know what he might do to you if he finds out…"

You've heard rumors before. People feared Master Jeon at the town, it was common knowledge. You've heard people saying how he could be ruthless when he wanted. But you never thought he would do anything worse than some threatening.

However, Jungkook is his son. He knows Master Jeon better than you do. If his son looks so frightened of what his own father might do…

Fear makes your body temperature decrease.

"I will protect your family." Jungkook continues. "I'll make sure that nothing bad happens to them and I'll find a way to take them out of here. But, first, we need to leave. As soon as possible."

Jungkook places his hand over your stomach in a reassuring way.

"I will never let anyone hurt you. I will protect you and our child."

The confidence in which he says this makes your heart feel warm. 

You trust him.

The small inn is nearly empty, but it doesn't make you any less nervous. Your heart is tight with insecurity and worry. You did everything Jungkook said: you left the house in the middle of the night, you didn't tell anything to your family (what was so painful that made you cry all the way out of the farm), you just brought a small case with a few clothes (not that you own many anyway). He asked you to wait here while he prepares everything. You plan to disappear tonight.

You put your hand on your belly and caress it; it's still hard to believe that there's someone growing inside of you, that in a few months you'll have a baby in your arms. The idea is terrifying… and reassuring. This child is the proof of your love. You love each other - and this love is so great that you couldn't keep it to yourselves only; this child is the result. It doesn't matter that you're not married yet or that life will definitely be more difficult from now on. You already love this child.

A small smile adorns your lips as the image of a baby boy with Jungkook's big eyes appears in your mind.

Everything will be alright. We have each other.

But you can't fight the insecurity and the growing anxiety.

You desperately want this to work out. You want to spend the rest of your life with Jungkook… but that pessimistic voice still echoes in your head, even though you've been trying to shut it. Almost as if… almost as if you've already faced a great disappointment in the past.

This feeling doesn't make sense. You would have remembered such suffering.

As time goes by, you start to get even more impatient and nervous. Your heart feels tight in a way you never felt before. What if something went wrong? Why is Jungkook taking so long?

That's when you hear the door cracking open behind you.

You immediately get up and smile, relief lifting the invisible weight from your shoulders. "Jungkook, I thought-"

When you turn around, the smile on your lips dies.

You're paralyzed.

Unconsciously, you take one step back.

"M-Master Jeon." You whisper weakly.

The man stares at you in a way that makes you feel small.

He enters the room and closes the door behind him. You take another step back.

He analyzes you from head to toe. His eyes are as cold as ice, as sharp as blades and as judging as the eyes of an executor. You feel impossibly cold. Your throat is dry. There's an acrid taste in your tongue.

This man always scared you. He barely even interacted with you in all the years that you and your family worked for him, but in the few times he did, it was always unpleasant. He treated your father badly, but this was nothing out of the extraordinary; his wife was equally awful to you, your mother and sisters. You always thought he was just another rich and arrogant man like many others you've met.

Tonight, however, you see in those eyes something you've never noticed and you've never seen in anyone.

He isn't just an arrogant man.

He represents real danger.

Master Jeon smirks. 

You instinctively put your hands on your stomach. Master Jeon follows the action with his eyes and tilts his head.

"I can't tell if you were smart or naive," the man starts. His voice makes your bones feel frozen. "I can't blame you for wanting a better life, kid. I guess that's all people like you dream of. But you choose the wrong person to take advantage of."

Your breathing is difficult. "W-What do you mean?"

"Don't play stupid with me, girl." He warns. "This situation is really bothersome. See, I let you and your family live in my property, let you eat my food and drink my water… and that's how you act with me? Try to trick my son? That's very low of you."

Your face contorts in disgust when you realize what he means. "You think I seduced Jungkook?! You're wrong! We love each other!"

"Don't make me laugh, kid." Master Jeon shakes his head as if he's reprimanding a little stubborn child. "Love you? Hah! You're a nobody." His eyes, once again, analyze you from head to toe. "I can't blame Jungkook for falling to your charms, though. It would be such a waste if he simply ignored you."

The disgust deepens. The way he talks about you makes you feel dirty. 

"But you see, kid, I'm not an evil man." He sarcastically says. "I don't like the idea of hurting women, a pregnant woman on top of that. I'm a good christian. And because of that, I'll give you a chance of ending this uncomfortable situation."

"I don't want to hear it," you say, although you felt your whole body shivering when he talked about hurting women. "You can't buy me. You can't separate me and Jungkook."

Master Jeon laughs darkly.

"Oh, darling. I can." Another shiver runs down your spine. "I want you to disappear forever. There's a carriage out there waiting for you. You'll never see my son again. Like this, you can give birth to your child peacefully and live your life as if you've never met him."

"No!" The anger overwhelms the fear and you end up screaming. "Jungkook is the father! You can't separate a father from his child!"

Master Jeon laughs as if you just told the funniest joke he ever heard. "Oh, you think you're so important, don't you? This child is a nobody, just like you. Jungkook made a mistake. He's a young man! Men make mistakes like this all the time. We're imperfect beings, after all. Don't you think that just because you're pregnant he has any responsibility over your child."

You're so shocked that you don't know what to say; your sight seems painted in red with pure anger. 

"You can't control me. You can't control us." Your fists tighten. "I won't leave."

Master Jeon's jaw clenches.

When he speaks again, his voice is dangerously low. 

"I said that I don't like the idea of hurting you… but what about your family, huh?"

You feel the world crumbling under your feet.

"W-What…?"

"Your family… a bunch of hungry rats. You've never really done a good job, in my opinion. Maybe it's time to get rid of all of them?"

Your hands start shaking.

"W-What do you m-mean…?"

"Do you know where my men are right now, kid?" A glint of satisfaction crosses Master Jeon's eyes when he sees your panic. "They're surrounding your small house. One order… and they'll burn it down. Your parents and your siblings are fast asleep right now, huh? I wonder how long will it take until they notice the fire…"

"No!"

Out of your wildest instincts, you throw yourself over him, fists tight, trying to hurt him everywhere you can touch. It's useless, though, for Master Jeon is overwhelmingly stronger than you and manages to grip your wrists in an instant.

"See how easily I can destroy your life?" He hisses. "Nobody would even notice that you and your family disappeared. That's because you're nothing, Y/N. You don't exist. This child doesn't exist. I won't let my son waste more time with you." Tears are rolling down your cheeks at this point. You've never been so scared in your life. "The only way to protect your family is to leave. So, what do you choose, huh?"

You look at Master Jeon right in the eye.

You know he isn't lying. You know this isn't the first time he kills someone - and he doesn't even feel guilty about it.

He just doesn't care.

You think of your family. They can't be punished because of your actions.

More than that… you think of your child. Their life depends on yours. You can't be imprudent anymore. 

You think of Jungkook.

It hurts so much that it feels as if you've been physically impalled. But, weakly and hesitantly, you nod.

"... I'll leave."

Master Jeon smiles, satisfied, and lets go of your wrists. "Good girl."

You don't have any strength to walk as Master Jeon's men take you to the carriage. The tears fall nonstop, you can't choke the sobs. You didn't even say goodbye to your family. They would never know what happened to you; you think of how painful it will be to your parents, searching for their daughter, never knowing if she's alive or not…

Jungkook will think you ran away from him. He'll never meet his own child. He'll never take them in his arms. 

You will never be in his arms once again.

You hug your own body, feeling empty and cold.

Why is the Universe so cruel to you? Why did it make you and Jungkook be part of completely different worlds? 

Why can't it let you be together?

You almost feel as if there are invisible shackles chaining your wrists tightly.

Only if you were not you, and he was not him… if you had different lives…

Quietly, you swear to yourself… if there is another life, then I'll go after Jungkook.

I will never give up on him.

I will never rest until we can finally be together.

× 1914 × 

"Sir," Jungkook starts, nervousness very evident in his posture and voice. "I love your daughter."

You nervously watch your father's reaction. He doesn't move, watching Jungkook very carefully. You fiddle with your fingers nervously. Your mother caresses your back, trying to calm you down at least a little.

"I promise I will take care of her, protect her and respect her until my last days." At the same time you feel touched, you also want to laugh. Jungkook is speaking in such a serious voice - he usually doesn't talk like this. It's endearing and makes your heart feel warm. "I will never hurt her or let her down. I ask you to approve our union, sir." He coughs and shifts. "Hmm… Please."

You try your hardest not to laugh, and so does your mother. God, he's adorable.

Your father still stares at Jungkook very seriously (threateningly) for long seconds. Long. Long. Seconds.

Jungkook is trying his best not to gulp.

"I know you since you were a kid, Jungkook. I know you very well." He gets up from the couch. "That's why I can't…"

Jungkook holds his breath.

So do you.

Your father finally breaks a smile.

"That's why I can't say no. You have my blessing."

Jungkook sighs in relief.

You get up in a jump and hug him, letting an excited scream slash the air. The atmosphere in the room immediately becomes light-hearted. 

"You didn't need to scare him so much, darling," your mother reprimands, although she has a smile on her lips. "We all knew you'd say yes."

"I had to put some pressure on him." Your father smiles widely and shakes Jungkook's hand. "I'm glad that you'll be part of our family, son." He then pushes Jungkook closer and his smile disappears. "But if you ever make my daughter cry, I will kill you."

"Darling!" Your mother exclaims.

You laugh and intertwine your fingers with his.

Jungkook and you are childhood friends - and you're in love with him ever since you can remember. He is not only your lover, but also your best friend. This is the moment you've been waiting for a long time; in a strange way, you always knew it would be him. It almost feels as if you've been perfectly crafted for each other. 

Your and Jungkook's families are very close. The village you live in is thriving and pacific. You're excited to tell your friends the good news; honestly, it seems that entire village knew it would happen someday.

Life is good.

And it is about to be even better now.

Nothing can put you and Jungkook apart.

You're walking down the street towards the grocery store in the morning when you notice a strange commotion.

The central square is more crowded than usual. There's an uncommon heavy tension hovering in the air; people talk to each other with worried expressions. Even Jungkook is standing outside of the grocery store, discussing with a neighbor. A frown shadows his features.

"Good morning." You greet the men. "What's happening?"

"Didn't you read the journal today?" Jungkook asks. His expression worries you even more.

He hands you the newspaper. 

The headline is written in bold, capital letters.

"War?" You mutter. It feels as if your inner temperature immediately decreases. "B-But… why?"

"Those important men," the old man who Jungkook was talking to scoffs. "They want to fight between themselves and end up involving everyone else!"

"B-But this is big." you mutter as your eyes quickly read down the page. Now you understand why everyone seemed so tense. "How many countries are involved…?"

"It seems that the troops are already marching." Another man says.

You just notice that your fingers were shaking when Jungkook holds your hand in a reassuring way.

You look at each other.

"This sounds horrible, Jungkook." 

"I know." He nods. "But I doubt that it will last too long. Besides, we're more than safe. This village is so far from anywhere important. We won't even notice anything."

You nod as well, staring at his reassuring eyes.

Of course, the news that a war started are bad. But Jungkook is right. There's no way you'll be involved in this. It's not as if it will be able to prevent your wedding.

It's not as if it can put you and Jungkook apart.

The living room of your house is dead silent.

The place is full of people: your family, neighbors, everyone sat on the couch, chairs or on the floor. The windows are opened, and there are even more neighbors peeking from them, trying to listen to the radio. Since your family is one of the few that possesses this device, you father made sure to invite everyone to listen to the news.

Every word spoken by the radio host seems to be striking through you. 

"Jesus Christ," your mother whispers. She holds the small crucifix close to her chest.

Hundreds. Thousands of dead soldiers, from many nationalities. Not only that: civilian cities have been bombarded as well. The number of dead is so great that the authorities have trouble counting them.

Something heavy and dark called grief hovers above your heads.

You grip Jungkook's hand even tighter. 

Your village is safe…

Right?

You sit quietly at the back of the grocery store and watch Jungkook finally close the doors at night. He looks tense and worried - like everyone else is.

"Look at these shelves. Almost empty." He sighs heavily, putting his hands on each side of his waist. "There's barely any merchandise; they don't sell us anything anymore. They give all the food to feed the soldiers in the battlefield."

"I think they need it more than we do." You say in all honesty.

"Well, yes, but soon we won't have any food."

Jungkook pushes a chair and sits in front of you. Your knees touch, you hold each other's hands. He looks so tired and drained. The war is starting to affect everyone: this grocery store is the only one in the village, and since the food is becoming so scarce, everyone suffers. 

"Jungkook…" you call quietly. He lifts his gaze to look at you. "I was thinking… maybe we should postpone our wedding."

"Why?" He frowns.

"Well… things are so difficult." You shrug sadly. "Besides, I don't think there's any atmosphere for weddings right now."

"Hey!" Jungkook leans closer and puts his hand on your cheek affectionately. "Don't say that. Of course, we won't be able to offer a big party like we imagined, but it doesn't matter, right? We can't let this bother us. We've been dreaming of this moment for years."

You sigh. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." He smiles. You love his smile. You love the way his eyes smile as well every time his lips do. "The situation doesn't matter… as long as we're together."

You can't help but smile, too.

"As long as we're together."

In one week, you’ll finally get married.

But you’re far from feeling happy.

There’s barely any food in the village. Past week, soldiers inspected every house and took the animals with themselves; they just let one chicken per family, and considering that many families didn’t even have animals in the first place, many of them are starting to face famine. Luckily, all the villagers are very united, so everyone made sure to share their food stock.

When you saw those soldiers arriving in the cars, you body paralyzed in sheer panic. Up until now, the war didn’t really seem real. You heard the news on the radio, on the journal, you knew that thousands of soldiers and civilians were dying. When food started to become scarce, it was bothersome, but it still felt too far. When those men wearing uniforms came, though, reality hit you all at once. 

The soldiers weren’t very polite. They entered the houses and took the animals without many explanations - what, of course, angered some people.

“Sir, you can’t take our animals like this!” one of your neighbors complained. When he spoke up, everyone on the main square went dead silent. “We have families, children! If you take our animals, we won’t have anything to eat!”

One of the soldiers - the one with the highest ranking, apparently - approached the man at heavy steps. His eyes reflected some type of anger and impassivity you’ve never seen before.

The eyes of someone who saw too much.

“Your compatriots are dying at this exact moment in the trenches.” His hard voice echoed around the square. “They’re agonizing, being dismembered, being taken away from their families. Offering your animals without complaints is the least thing you can do to minimize their pain. There is a war happening right now, sir. There are more important things to care about other than your family.”

No one dared to say anything else after this.

You feel that you already lost some kilos you shouldn’t have lost. Your dresses and skirts seem larger than they were supposed to be. You try not to complain about it, though; the kids needed to eat more than you, after all, especially now that winter is coming. The temperature at night already feels too cold.

The main square used to be a bright and happy place, even at night, when villagers liked to take late night walks. These days, though, people don’t have the courage to walk at night anymore. It seems that, ever since the war started, the colors of the world are fading away slowly. Everything seems… grey.

“They’re saying that this is the war to end all wars.” Jungkook says quietly. Since the square is empty, you two can have some privacy. Yet, it feels lonely. “But at what cost?”

You sigh heavily. The journals and radio are constantly spreading speeches full of patriotism, trying to make people support the war, but you can’t agree with any of them. Civilian villages like yours and the many others around the country have nothing to do with this war, nor the poor soldiers sent to fight. No one cares about patriotism or honor when a dead body is all that lasted from a loved one.

“But it could be worse,” you say. Small clouds of steam are formed at each breathing. “At least our village isn’t near the front. I can’t even imagine how much these people are suffering.”

Jungkook intertwines his fingers with yours. His cheeks are hollower and he has purple bags under his eyes; he also lost weight. You don’t like to see him like this. “When we planned our wedding months ago, this is not how I expected it to be.”

“Neither did I.” you admit sadly. This feeling of grief seems to be hovering above the village - and the world - all the time; no one feels excited about your wedding. “Are you sure we should still get married, Jungkook? Shouldn’t we wait a little bit more?”

“We can’t give up now that we’re so close.” He always finds the strength to smile when you need him the most. “I… I feel sorry that our wedding won’t be what we expected. I wish we could get married at better times, too. But… we’ll be together. That’s what matters, isn’t it?”

You can’t help but smile and nod.

Yet, something tells you that Jungkook doesn’t want to postpone your wedding because of some darker reason. A reason you don’t really want to consider.

Jungkook puts his arm around your shoulders and pulls you closer, pressing his lips on your temple. “I love you.” he whispers.

“I love you, too.”

In this world full of violence and uncertainty, at least one thing is certain: your love for each other.

That’s when you hear the sound.

It’s far. So far that, for a while, you simply ignore it.

But it becomes louder.

“A thunder?” you wonder, frowning. You and Jungkook look up at the sky at the same time; the clouds don’t look like storm ones. 

The sound repeats.

Both of you sit straight and look at each other. It doesn’t sound like a thunder anymore. 

Some villagers come out of their houses or look through the windows. Just like you, they stare at the sky in confusion.

Jungkook stands up and stares at north, eyes widened. 

You look at the same direction.

Far away, the dark sky lights up - but not in the way that it does when a lightning slashes the air. The light has a reddish color to it. It doesn’t fade away so fast.

The floor trembles under your feet.

“Y/N,” Jungkook calls. His voice sounds quiet, almost too shocked, and worried. “Go home. Now.”

You hear the villagers gasping and getting into their houses again as realization hits them as well.

Bombs.

In the next morning, your village is crowded with soldiers.

None of you were able to sleep at night. The unstoppable sound of the bombs and planes didn’t let you blink an eye. The sounds still seemed to be considerably far, but they were enough to make the floor shake and your worst nightmares become reality.

When the sounds finally stopped, a deep silence reigned.

Some hours after, early in the morning, the sound of cars took place. Cars, carriages and male voices.

Many voices.

Your father didn’t let you and your mother leave the house. You two had to sit there and wait for seemingly endless hours to know what was happening. The nervousness seemed to be eating you up alive.

Finally, your father came back. You and your mother get up at the same time, anxious.

“What’s happening?” you ask in a hurried tone.

You father passes his hand on his head. He looks shocked, worried and scared - all at once.

“A village some kilometers away from here was bombarded last night.” He announces. Your mother gasps and puts her hand over her chest. You just stare at him, frozen in place.

“A-And what are the soldiers doing here?”

His gaze rests in you.

You don’t like that gaze.

“Y/N, they… they…”

“They what?” fear starts to take control. You notice your father holds a folded piece of paper. “What is this?”

You forcefully take the paper from his hands and open it.

“They are spreading this around the village,” your father’s voice sounds somehow guilty.

You can’t move.

“What’s happening, darling?” your mother asks.

No.

“They came to recruit all the young and healthy men to fight in the war.”

Your fingers are shaking. Your eyes are already full of tears.

Jungkook.

You run out of the house, ignoring your parents screaming at you, asking you to stop.

You don’t care that it’s too cold and you’re not wearing appropriate clothes. You don’t care that the city is completely full of soldiers and some of them yell inappropriate comments about you as you run by. You don’t care about the way your neighbors look at you.

They can’t take Jungkook. They can’t.

When you reach the main square, though, your heart drops.

All the young men are standing in lines. The youngest is probably only fourteen years old; the boy cries quietly, trying to choke his own sobs. 

“Don’t take my son away from me!” a woman screams, being held back by other villagers. “He’s just a boy! Please!”

“Shut up, woman!” a soldier screams back at her in a threatening way. 

More people are crying quietly. The sight almost looks like a funeral.

Then, you find him.

He’s already standing there, jaw clenched, fists tight, eyes glued on his feet.

“Jungkook!”

He lifts his gaze.

You see the worry. The anger. The fear. Jungkook has never looked so scared in his life. 

And this is what breaks you.

You try to run to him, but a soldier holds you back. Jungkook looks at you, helpless, as you struggle in a desperate attempt to fight the soldier. Your sight is blurred due to the tears.

“No! You can’t take him! You can’t take him! Jungkook!”

That’s why he didn’t want to postpone the wedding.

He knew that this could happen anytime.

“Stop it, bitch!” the soldier yells and pushes you violently. Your shoulder hits the hard ground and you groan in pain.

“Don’t touch her!”

A commotion starts when Jungkook throws himself over the soldier and punches his face. The young boys don’t know what to do; the villagers can just watch in shock; other soldiers move quickly. Three of them are necessary to take Jungkook away from the soldier. You scream, desperate, when they start to punch and kick him. 

Jungkook lays on the floor, nose bleeding, tears streaming down his cheeks.

“It seems that you already want to start your days in the military with a punishment!” a soldier yells mockingly and spits on him. “This one won’t last a day in the front.”

The front?!

You try to get up, but suddenly feel too weak to do so. Instead, you grab the boot of a soldier nearby. The man looks down at you.

“P-Please,” you whisper. The sobs won’t let you speak properly. “Don’t take him away from me.”

The man stares at you in silence. However, his gaze over you is different from the other soldiers; he looks tired, sad and compassionate. Although he probably has no authorization, he helps you to get up with care.

“I’m sorry.” is all that he can say before walking away.

Panic grows stronger when two soldiers take Jungkook from the floor rather roughly and start dragging him away. 

All the other young men start to march as well, following the orders. Mothers and fathers around you cry harder. Their sons yell their farewells and promises to stay safe.

But you refuse to say goodbye.

“Jungkook! Jungkook!” again, you try to run to him, but a different person holds you back this time: your father. Your voice cracks. You can’t stop crying.

He looks at you behind his shoulder; the soldiers won’t stop dragging him. The fact that the glint of happiness you know so well can’t be seen in his eyes kills you.

The fact that, once again, Jungkook tries to smile in a reassuring way even though he’s bleeding and crying kills you even more.

“I love you,” he says, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I’ll always love you. I’ll always come back to you.”

He disappears inside one of the cars.

You scream until your throat hurts. You cry until your chest aches and your sight is unclear. Your parents don’t let you run after the car as the troops leave the village, taking all the young and healthy men with them.

Taking the love of your life with them.

And you couldn’t even touch him one last time.

× 1915 ×

You don’t look at yourself in the mirror anymore.

You know that you’re way too thin, way too drained out of any life that still lasted inside of you. Long gone is the happy girl you used to be. She is dead.

It seems that happiness itself disappeared from this world.

Many villagers died during the year due to famine, diseases, or the severe winter. Soldiers came to the village to take as many clothes they could find - the army needed fabric to make more uniforms. It seems that the sun doesn’t shine as much as it used to. The sky isn’t as blue. Birds don’t chirp anymore.

You don’t even feel too shocked anymore when you hear the terrifying sirens and the sound of bombers from far and you’re all forced to hide in the few deep enough basements in the village.

The only thing you do is wonder where he is.

You didn’t receive any letter. Any report. Nothing. But you know he is alive, because no one came to your house bringing a folded flag and a medal as they always do to honor a fallen soldier.

Many of the boys that were forcefully dragged into the war have fallen.

But Jungkook hasn’t. This is what brings you hope. This is why you sit close to the radio day and night in the hopes to hear any news, any hint of his whereabouts. For weeks, the radio is silent, meaning that something broke the connection. But it always starts working again.

He will come back. 

You managed to hide your wedding dress from the soldiers. It’s still inside the wardrobe, untouched.

× 1916 ×

One morning, someone knocks on your front door.

You dreamed of this moment multiple times. The moment when Jungkook would come back, safe and sound, wearing a uniform. He would smile and hug you. His body and soul might be hurt, but you’re sure that you could help him get over whatever horrors he witnessed. 

You could face anything together. 

But you already know it isn’t him before you open the door. 

Instead, another soldier stands in front of you.

He carries a perfectly folded flag in his arms.

In this moment, something inside of you dies.

You lost sight of time.

An hour might have passed by. A day, a week. You have no idea. You cried yourself asleep so many times that it made difficult to know.

The flag doesn’t smell like him. It doesn’t represent him. Still, you hug it close to your chest as if it was him. The fabric is humid with your endless tears. 

Why is the Universe so cruel?

Why couldn’t it simply wait one week? 

Why did you have to be born in a world full of violence, full of death?

You don’t understand why the chains of fate chose to punish you of all people. You just wanted to be with the love of your life. That’s all you ever wanted.

Now, he’s gone. You’ll never see him, touch him, hear his voice. Whenever you think of how he possibly died, more and more tears come. The person you loved the most in the world, the kindest man you’ve ever met - lonely, cold, hungry and hurt in a filthy trench.

The last reminiscent of his existence is the letter laying beside you - the letter you weren’t brave enough to read.

You remembered the soldier that came to bring you the flag: he was the same man from two years ago that helped you to get up. With an amputated leg, he was too injured to keep fighting and was sent back home. But he insisted on coming himself to your village.

“My name is Jimin,” he explained quietly. He looked sad, his eyes were devoid of any bright feeling. “I fought alongside Jungkook in the same troop. He saved my life. He… He was a good man.” Jimin reached for something in the pocket of his shirt: a letter. “He asked me that if he didn’t make it, I should give you this.” The young soldier had to fight back his own tears. “He… he really loved you, ma’am. I hope this can give you some comfort.”

You stare at the dirty folded paper. 

Nothing in this world will ever comfort you.

Yet, with trembling fingers, you unfold the paper and start to read it.

Tears immediately begin falling.

It’s undeniably his calligraphy; by the way some letters are retorted, you can see that he wrote it hurriedly. The paper somehow smells like mud and his fingerprints are all over it.

Once again, you start crying.

This pain will never go away.

Dear Y/N,

I apologize that we couldn’t have the party we always dreamed of. In the moments the pain becomes too great, I like to imagine you wearing your wedding dress. I regret not stealing a glance at it. I should have ignored the tradition that says that seeing the bride wearing the wedding dress before the wedding day brings bad luck.

I don’t want you to suffer imagining what I went through or the things I saw. I beg you to remember us in our best moments, for this is the way I will always remember you. Your smile, your eyes, your hair; no one can ever take these memories away from me, and for this I am grateful.

I wish we could have stayed together. I apologize that I couldn’t keep my promise of being with you until my last days. I truly apologize, Y/N. I hope that your father won’t be mad at me. But I’m a man of my word; and, if there is the slightest chance of us being together again, if by chance there is a next life, I swear I will search for you and keep my promise. Not even this war, heaven or hell, not even death will make us part. 

We will be together. I swear.

Please know that I left this world in peace - because the last thing I saw when I closed my eyes was you.

Forever yours,

Jungkook

× 2017 ×

“Shit!” you exclaim when you check your phone and see the hour.

Oh, no. You can’t be late for Mr. Hwang’s class again. The man apparently already hates you for existing, you can’t give him even more chances to hate you. 

You’re not the most punctual person, and you don’t even have a proper excuse this time. You just sat at the mall’s food court to eat your Big Mac peacefully and boom - one hour has passed. It’s not really your fault that Percy Jackson and The Last Olympian is such a good book. You hesitated for a long time to start reading this series, but now that you gave it a chance, you can’t stop reading - especially not now that Percy is about to drown in the Styx River. 

Can this be considered a good excuse? Maybe Mr. Hwang is a Percy Jackson fan. Who knows.

Your roommate likes to call you The Goddess of Procrastination. You can’t even be mad at her. She’s right.

You sigh and throw the book inside of your bag. If you run fast enough, you’ll manage to make it into the class just ten minutes late. Still better than the last time that you arrived five minutes before the class ended. No one has ever looked at you with so much hatred in this life other than Mr. Hwang in that moment.

But, as you’re about to get up and leave, you hear a phone buzzing.

And it isn’t yours.

You frown, noticing for the first time that a phone lays on the empty chair in front of you. Checking the screen, you see that there’s an incoming call. The name Jimin is written on the screen.

You think of simply ignoring it. It’s none of your business. But something - curiosity, maybe - makes you take the phone and answer the call.

“Hello?” you say, hesitant.

“Oh, thanks Goodness,” a male voice sighs in relief from the other side of the line. For some reason, you feel goosebumps. “Hm, hi. I think you found my phone.”

“Yeah, I think so.” 

“Where did you find it?”

“Hm… at the food court. Here in the mall near the subway station.”

You hear another male voice through the line saying “I told you that you forgot it there, idiot.”

“Shut up, Jimin.” the man scolds and coughs. “I’m sorry. Look, I’m not very far from the mall right now. Could you please wait a little bit so I can pick up my phone with you?”

You bite your bottom lip nervously. You’re way too late for Mr. Hwang’s class. You can’t waste any more time.

Yet… almost as if an invisible force makes you stand in place, you nod (even though he can’t see it). “Alright. But please, be fast.”

“Okay! I’ll be fast! Please, stay exactly where you are. I’ll be there in five minutes!”

He hangs up the phone.

You sit on the chair again, hopeless, and place his phone over the table, so he can see it clearly when he comes. Your leg shakes impatiently as you look around, trying to figure out who the owner is.

You stare at your bag.

One or two more pages won’t hurt.

You take the book again and open where you stopped. This is a tense moment of the story. I mean, you know that Percy won’t die. That’s the beginning of the book after all. But still, the tension is so great that you feel yourself at the edge of your seat. It’s also kind of embarrassing that you don’t know what’s about to happen since this book was released almost ten years ago. Your roommate likes to annoy you, saying that you like to read books for children, but if she had any idea of how good-

“Hm, excuse me.”

You lift your gaze from the book.

There’s a young man standing beside you. He has pitch black hair, fair skin, and honestly the biggest eyes you’ve ever seen. He wears a grey oversized hoodie, black pants and sneakers.

And, for a moment, the world around you seems to stop.

You don’t know exactly why you feel that you can’t breath.

You stare at each other for an embarrassingly long moment before you come back to your senses. You cough and stand up in a jump.

“I-I guess you’re the owner?” you say in an awkward manner. The man blinks and nods; he also seems a bit out of place.

“Y-Yeah!” he smiles. Your heart jumps. He takes the phone. “Thank you so much for waiting. I was going desperate already.”

“It’s alright.” you shrug. “I lose things all the time, too.” 

“I hope I didn’t make you late for anything.”

“No! You didn’t.” He did. “It's totally fine.”

You stand in front of each other awkwardly.

There’s something… strange about this man. You can’t tell what. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s extremely good-looking. But for some reason, your heart is beating fast, your stomach is doing flips and you can't look away from him.

"Alright." He coughs. "I'll… I'll get going. Thank you again."

"You're welcome."

You wave at each other and walk away in opposite directions.

You have to exhale heavily. What the hell was that?! Your heart won't stop beating fast. The whole situation was so strange. He also looked somehow-

"Hey! Wait!"

You feel a hand touching your shoulder. You turn around.

It's him again.

He has a small smile on his lips. He analyzes your face with a frown in a puzzled expression.

"Don't we know each other already?" He asks. "I… I have the feeling that we have met somewhere."

You're ready to say no, but as you analyze his features back, you feel a shiver.

You're sure you've never met him in your life.

Yet, at the same time… he looks familiar. Like the memory of a dream. A dream with horses running freely in an open field. A dream with a choir of nuns singing praises in a great church. A dream with stars, with whispered confessions, the sounds of a storm. A river flowing quietly. The smell of soap. The taste of salty tears, a letter marked with mud. Swords and crowns. A white wedding dress.

You feel dizzy.

"I… I don't know." Your mind is confused. "I don't remember very well."

He nods. His smile becomes timid.

"Maybe we could get to know each other?" He offers. "As a way of thanking you for taking care of my phone. We could get some coffee, maybe? Or soda. Or a beer. Or whatever you like."

You remember that there is still a class to attend.

But Mr. Hwang can wait.

"Coffee sounds nice," you say, smiling back at him.

His own smile widens. It's adorable how his eyes are also smiling. "Great! So… what's your name?"

"It's Y/N."

He repeats your name quietly, almost as if tasting it in his tongue. "Nice to meet you, Y/N. My name is Jungkook."

× 2020 ×

Jungkook falls silent when he finally understands what you're saying.

It's painful to see his frown deepening, the confusion disappearing and being replaced by subtle sadness.

You weren't ready for this.

But it has to be done.

"So… you're leaving." He repeats quietly. You nod.

"Yes." It's a shame that you can't even look at his eyes. "You know how this job offer is important to me. I… I couldn’t say no.”

He opens a small smile. This is what hurts the most. “I know. I’m proud of you, Y/N. I know how much you fought for this job.” His smile fades away as he reaches for your hand. “But… I can’t say that being away from you makes me happy.”

“I’m not happy about this either,” you admit. You want Jungkook to understand how much this is being difficult. How much it’s being painful. 

“So… how long will you be away?” 

You inhale heavily. 

“I don’t know.”

Jungkook seems frozen in place. 

“You… don’t know?” he repeats quietly. Almost as if he can’t believe what he’s hearing.

The pain becomes stronger.

“The plans are for me to stay indefinitely.”

This is when Jungkook finally realizes why you look so sad. 

He leans on the chair and passes his hand on his hair. You see the color draining from his face. Oh no. As stupid as it seems, you don’t want him to suffer… but you knew he would suffer anyway. 

“Are you telling me that you’re leaving the country indefinitely?” That look in his eyes… “But Y/N… what about us?”

“We can travel and see each other.”

“None of us have the money to keep traveling around like this.” Jungkook points the obvious. Sure, you expect to have a better salary with this job, but things won’t be easy during the first months. 

“We can make it. We’ll figure out what to do.” your own words sound empty, barely a desperate attempt to avoid the obvious.

“How, Y/N? You���re going to the other side of the world and you might never come back.”

You blink rapidly to try to dissipate the tears. “B-But… I don’t want to leave you.”

“You are leaving me.” This sentence felt like a dagger being buried in your heart. Jungkook exhales heavily, trying to calm himself down. He gulps and closes his eyes for a moment.

When he opens them again, he smiles in a reassuring way. Even though he’s hurt, he still tries to console you. This is what breaks you the most. You never understood why he has this habit. You’re so used to it already…

Jungkook reaches for your hand again. “Y/N, I want you to know that I’m truly happy for you. I know how this job is important. You’re going after your dreams. And I… I don’t want to stand in your way.”

“No! You’re not in my way.” You grab his other hand, feeling your heart clench at every minute.

“But I don’t want to trap you here if that’s not what you want for your life.” 

“Jungkook!” You call out. This is not how you want things to end - not that you want it to end at all. “We’ve been together for three years. I am with you because I want to. You’re not trapping me.”

He blinks rapidly again. You notice that he’s trying to fight back the tears, just like you. “But I don’t think this relationship will work like this.”

You can’t say anything. 

He’s right. You know it. You chose to accept the job offer and leave the country. You knew that neither of you would be able to stay away from each other like this.

“What do you mean…?” you whisper, asking the obvious.

“I mean that we should end now.” You want to say no. But again - you know he’s right. You also don’t want to trap him in a relationship when you’ll be away for most of the time. 

You can’t hold back the tears anymore.

“I’m sorry.” you whisper weakly.

“Don’t apologize. We all make our choices, don’t we?” He’s still smiling, but you see no hint of happiness in his eyes. He looks down and presses his lips tightly. “Maybe… maybe in our next life, we’ll be together.”

You don’t know why he said that so suddenly. 

But, for some reason, it hits you deep. So deep that you’re left speechless.

Jungkook gets up. “I really wish you’ll be happy, Y/N.”

For a moment, it seems that he wants to say something more. But he doesn’t. Instead, he turns around and walks away.

He’s glad that you can’t see his tears.

He’s also glad that he didn’t have enough time to show you the ring he bought yesterday.

Although the airport is busy, you feel lonely and cold on the inside.

You’ve been staring at nothing for a long time now, sitting alone in the corner. You said your goodbyes to your friends and family; all of them wished you luck and said you made the best decision of your life. Building a good career and being financially successful is all that matters in this world, after all.

But you can’t feel happy.

You tried to convince yourself that changes are difficult. Moving to a different country with a different culture and habits is never an easy task. It will take some time to adapt your mindset to it. You also can't ignore the fact that you’re leaving everyone you know behind; you’ll have to make new friends. All of this is hard. It’s normal to feel a little bit sad.

The thing is - you’re not feeling just a little bit sad.

You actually feel that there’s a deep hole inside your chest.

The image of Jungkook’s sad smile does not left your mind all these days. He looked so devastated, so disappointed… yet still tried to encourage you. He thought that he was being a burden in your life; this is what hurts you the most. Jungkook was never a burden. Ever since you met him that day at the mall, it seems that your life has brighter colors and happiest days. Jungkook understands you like no other person ever did. You two have such a deep connection that you can tell what each other are feeling or thinking even if you don’t say anything. It feels that you’ve known him your entire life, even though you met him only three years ago.

There are times when you have strange dreams with him. They are blurry and hard to remember when you wake up, but sometimes, you see him and yourself in situations you’ve never lived before. It gets even stranger when you remember that you and him were wearing old clothing from centuries ago.

When you told your roommate about your dreams - they started barely a week after you first met him - she laughed at said jokingly:

“Maybe you guys met in a past life.”

You know she wasn’t serious. You’ve never been one to believe in things like reincarnation, and you also didn’t think much of it. But the idea of meeting him in the past - the single fact that you may have existed before - was… unsettling.

Especially because you also had many nightmares with him.

Nightmares in which he was taken away from you, and you could do nothing but cry.

Whenever you had one of those nightmares, although you couldn’t remember them clearly, the bad feeling lingered with you during the whole day. This feeling only vanished when you saw him in front of you. He is here. We are together.

Not anymore.

This is being hard to deal with.

You always dreamed with this job. Actually, living abroad was one of the main objectives in your life. This job opportunity is everything you ever wanted. You shouldn’t be feeling sad like this, not now that you achieved your biggest dream.

Soon, when you settle down and start experiencing the life you always wanted, the sadness will fade away. You had a beautiful however short story with Jungkook. You’ll only carry good memories of him. Having a good and healthy relationship to remember is more than most people have, right?

There’s no reason to feel so bad.

You lift your head when you hear the speakers calling all the passengers for your flight. You get up, straighten your clothes and take the tickets. 

The time has come.

You walk to the boarding area, pushing your suitcases with you. This is the beginning of your new life. The new you. 

Each step feels heavy.

Your breathing and your heartbeat echoes on your ears. You can’t really focus in anything around. 

You’re leaving Jungkook.

But Jungkook himself said that you should do what you wanted. He supported your decision. 

You’re leaving Jungkook.

You dream of this career ever since you were a teenager. That’s why you worked so hard up to this day. This is your reward. Many people your age would kill to have this opportunity.

But you’re leaving Jungkook.

You can’t go back now. You have signed your contract. They are waiting for you at-

I will never give up on him.

You stop on your tracks.

I will never rest until we can finally be together.

Time seems to have slowed down.

Why… why did you hear this voice in your head? 

It sounded distant… like one of those blurry dreams. 

You shake your head and start walking again, but slower this time. Your palms are sweaty for some reason. 

It feels as if an invisible force is pulling you back. Something deep within you - something you can’t remember and can’t comprehend - echoes like an alarm. Something you should be aware of, but you can’t figure out what it is, it doesn’t matter how much you try.

A strong feeling of grief. An emptiness. Almost like crying for endless days and nights until you had no tears left to cry. A sadness so deeply rooted that no one would be able to rip out.

A feeling you are familiar with.

Meeting Jungkook was a miracle. Of all the people in this immense world, you came across the one that matches you the most. Many people live their entire lives without meeting someone like this.

And you’re leaving him.

A thought that doesn’t make much sense whispers in your head… nobody, no circumstance, nothing is forbidding your love. Nothing can separate you. For the first time, the Universe isn’t being cruel to you.

The only thing pulling you apart from each other is… yourself.

It’s your choice.

“Ma’am?” you hear a male voice saying. Your sight focuses, and you see the airport security guard looking at you awkwardly, waiting for you to show him your ticket and passport. “Is everything okay?”

The bridge that leads to the plane is right in front of you.

The bridge to your new life.

Not even this war, heaven or hell, not even death will make us part. 

We will be together. I swear.

“I can’t.” you whisper. The security guard frowns.

“Excuse me?”

“I-I can’t.” Adrenaline starts to boil your blood. “I need to leave. I need to go back.”

The other passengers look at you with confusion as you walk away from the line. Then you’re running. The suitcases shake with your violent and ungainly run, but you couldn’t care less. You need to leave this airport. You need to meet him. The taxi driver looks scared when you yell, asking for his help to shove the carriers inside of his car. Still, you don’t care about how crazy you look or how people are looking at you.

All you can think of is Jungkook’s galaxy eyes looking at you as if you meant the world to him. 

He is your world.

You can’t leave your world behind.

You’re sweating and your hands are shaking and you can’t control your breathing when you finally stop in front of his apartment and knock on the door unceremoniously.

Nervousness and adrenaline creeps on your skin; you’re aware that your hair is probably a mess. You don’t know how he will react. You didn’t think of calling him before coming; that’s just how crazy you are.

The door cracks open and you hold your breath.

Jungkook’s eyes widen when he sees you. He’s wearing sleeping clothing and he’s got bed hair, which should mean he was sleeping, but the bags underneath his eyes tells you the opposite. He looks bad - similar to when he would spend entire nights awake studying for finals, only worse.

It looks like he can’t breath, too.

“Y/N,” the way he says your name makes your heart jump. “W-What are you doing here? I thought you were leaving today…” he looks behind you and notices the suitcases, what makes him frown in confusion.

“Yes.” you nod. “I was supposed to leave today.”

“Supposed?” He is so confused. “Did something happen?”

“Yes.” You sigh deeply before speaking. Your blood feels boiling hot; your stomach twirls and jumps. “I went to the airport. I said goodbye to everyone. I was ready to leave.”

Jungkook just watches you in silence. You see when, slowly, his eyes start to light up again as you speak; they light up with… hope.

“B-But then, I stopped and thought that I would never see you again. And… and I don’t think I can take it.” I can’t take it once again, a voice whispers in your mind. “You said that you wish I’d be happy, but I can’t be happy if I’m not with you.”

The tears start trickling down your cheeks. This time, though, they’re tears of joy.

“I love you, Jungkook. And I’m not waiting for another lifetime to be with you.”

Jungkook engulfs you in a tight hug.

You hug him back just as tight; he kisses the top of your head multiple times and you hear him sniffling. Everything feels right and at place. Being with him is the right thing, regardless of what anyone can think.

From far, you have the slight impression that you hear something… the sound of steel chains breaking apart. Your wrists suddenly feel weightless. Almost as if an invisible force finally lets you go.

Free.

Jungkook leans away but still keeps you close; his eyes and nose are reddish and his face is wet with tears. He has the smile you’ve learned to love. You wipe his tears away. He looks gorgeous, as he always was.

“Hm… I bought you something.” He says sheepishly and puts his hand in his back pocket. “I don’t know if you will like it. I also don’t know if it’s the right time… we’re too young, but… that’s just how I feel about you.”

You have to cover your mouth with your hand when Jungkook takes a beautiful ring in his fingers.

“I-I don’t know if you want this too, but I want to give it to you anyway…”

“Of course I want it!”

Jungkook almost falls back when you throw yourself over him again, tightly embracing your arms around his neck. He laughs and lifts you up, and you lock your legs around his waist. 

He takes you inside the apartment. None of you remember about your suitcases outside.

“I am so happy,” Jungkook whispers between the kisses; you feel the happiness radiating from him like a bright light. You only know each other for three years, but it feels as if you’ve been waiting for this moment forever.

Nothing else matters in this moment. Right now, you belong to each other. 

You always did.

Nothing in the Universe can change this fact - not even the past, the present, and the future.

“I love you.” Jungkook says, looking deep inside your teary eyes.

“And I always will.”

#btswriterscollective #jungkook fanfic #jungkook scenario #jungkook imagine #jungkook angst #bts jungkook #bts jeongguk #jeongguk scenario #jeongguk fanfic #jeongguk imagine #jeongguk angst #jungkook fanfiction #jeongguk fanfiction #jungkook fluff #jeongguk fluff #jungkook x reader #jeongguk x reader #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts x reader #bangtan fanfiction #bangtan scenarios #bangtan imagines #bts angst #bts fluff #1st anniversary event

[doubleshotofsomething]

Come Into My Life

This is my entry for @nekoannie-chan​‘s 500 followers’ writing competition. This is a Thor fanfiction series inspired on the song “Entra en mi Vida”. I had a blast writing it and I loved the song even more.

Song Prompt: ”Entra en mi vida” by Sin Bandera

Warnings: none??

Author’s note: Okay, all seriousness guys, what the fuck? So, you guys just...let me call Ghost “Shadow” and didn’t bother to correct me? really guys? really?? Is this where we are now? woooow, there’s no autocorrect here.

Summary: You and Thor just can’t seem to be on the same page, about anything.

----

“You seem to think this is something you can hide from.”

----

Part Two: Después de cinco minutos, ya eras alguien especial  

Mjölnir kept disappearing. But that could have been Steve's fault. Or Vision. So, that's understandable.

Then Stormbreaker kept disappearing as well. There was no Vision. And Steve had long given up his avenging days.

Both weapons came back, they always did. But Stormbreaker seemed to be adamant in taking its sweet time. Which, under any circumstances, wouldn't be a problem. Except, Thor is still an Avenger. He still has work - work that required his weapon - to do.

You were in the kitchen with Sam, arguing - like you always did - about something when Thor walked in, looking for that damned axe.

You had met a handful of times, but you tended to avoid the group as much as you could. Sam, Shadow and Hope were as far as you were willing to go, Thor had realised, and socialising with you didn't seem all too appealing to him.

Thor wasn't focusing on either of you, eyes too busy dancing around the room as he tied his hair back. The quinjet was set to leave in fifteen minutes and all that was missing from his battle attire was that cursed thing.

"This is exactly why I don't like coming here-" your complaining broke through his cloud of thought and his eyes went to you. "--seriously, Sam, you are the worst host ever. What am I supposed to do with you gone?"

Sam rolled his eyes, rolling his shoulders back a bit before attaching his wings. "Talk to people. Your favourite cyborg is staying behind, so you two can talk about those babies you wanted to give him."

You scoffed and reached over the counter for the sugar dispenser. "The love of my life is currently sulkin--"

Before you could grab the sugar, your fingers instinctively wrapped around a wooden staff. Sam, too focused on making sure he had everything he needed, missed the complete look of annoyance on your face and shock on Thor's face.

There, in your hand, was Stormbreaker. His Stormbreaker. And, instead of being confused, you sighed and tossed it aside before grabbing the sugar as you had intended to. As if nothing had happened.

"Damn thing needs a leash," you mumbled to yourself, stirring the sugar into the originally-Sam's-but-now-yours tea.

Asgard was no stranger to prophecies. And Thor had heard enough of them growing up to tell which was a farce. But this...

No...

It couldn't be...

Surely, it was a temporary glitch. It had to be.

Because a dying star couldn't have forged a King's weapon, only so an idiot could easily wield it.

It's not that Thor thought you were stupid or not worthy. It's just that he thought you were an idiot and a complete nutcase.

You put a target on your back and refused any security that Fury had to offer. You're still convinced that your Uber driver won't do you any harm. And you sleep with your bedroom window unlocked.

You were an idiot.

A complete and utter idiot.

So, why did he instantly seek out your scent whenever he breathed?

Why does the thought of you, anywhere near him, suddenly make it hard to think about anything else?

And, for the love of all that is good, why won't you look at him? Actually look at him. Not those glances and polite eye contact you share with everyone else.

There are so many prophecies, too many that weren't true and too little that were. Thor could always tell which were a farce and which weren't.

But now, he was the idiot that couldn't understand why his axe was more responsive to you, than him.

-----

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Is Fury's response to the Captain's questions.

The Avenger's Compound had been turned into the current base of operations for both the new SHIELD and the Avengers. With the exception that the Captain was the one overlooking everything, alongside Fury.

Hope didn't waste time shoving you into her car -- as always -- and dragging you to the compound with everyone else. And then, because that's never enough, they shoved you into the meeting room with everyone else, while Captain went to bring Fury.

Sighing, you lean against your chair and turn to look at Thor. The Asgardian had been sitting on the couch when you were shoved onto it, watching the whole scene unfold while he munched away on a bowl of cereal.

You eyed his outfit and frowned. "Why is it that every time I see you, you're always trying out a new look?"

He blinked at you, mid-chew with a trail of milk going from the corner of his lip into his beard.

"First, it was the whole medieval knight thing, then the carpenter look, then the whole lumberjack thing. And now--" you waved at his sweatpants, fingerless gloves and what look to be a sweater. "--you're... what is this? And why does it look so comfortable?"

"Really? You expect us to believe that SHIELD is being funded by all that money?" Sam fired back at Fury. "With all that new equipment that keeps rolling in? Do we look stupid to you, Fury?"

Fury raised an eyebrow. "You want me to answer that?"

"I will!" You jumped in, raising your hand as you tuned in. "Yes, you do look stupid. In fact, you're the reason I know what stupid looks like. And I got in an Uber without checking if it was my driver or not, this morning."

"You did what?!" Thor barked.

You rolled your eyes and waved off the man that's decided to be a pain in your ass. "Calm down, security update. I can take care of mys--

"Calm down?!" Thor tossed the bowl across the room to properly glare at you. "You are so adamant on putting your life at risk every damn chance you get! You are, arguably, the most hated person on every ex-Hydra agent's list. And you--"

You don't bother to sit through the rest of that lecture. You avoid going to the compound for that exact reason. In fact, you avoid Thor for that exact reason. The first time you met the Asgardian, he spent most of the introductions helping Fury tell you all about how you were going to live your life now -- and all the safety measures you'd have to take.

As if you hadn't been raised by one of the world's greatest sleeper agent.

"This guy, am I right?" You scoffed as you got up, consequently getting him to get up. "Who died and made him Jarvis?"

"I am speaking to you!" He is front of you, towering over you, blue eyes swimming with rage, as he glared at you.

"Carpet damn, Asgardian. Carpet damn."

Ghost, from the other side of the room, cut in. "It's Carpe diem, shithead."

"I'm freestyling, thank you very much." You shot back.

"Can we get back to the matter at hand?" Captain Flightless called out. "Thor. Please, calm down. Take a seat."

"I will not calm down nor take a seat," he glares down Mr Red, White and Break-your-brand-new-car. "Her safety is just as important as the matter. What do you think will happen if the wrong people get their hands on her? SHIELD signing a deal with her company will be the least of your worries!"

You turned at Ghost. "Is it too late to bring back Thanos? I just wanna see something..."

"You know--" Sam flicked your ear. "--if he comes back, you're gonna get dusted too, right?"

"Exactly. That way, I get to see him beat the shit out of an entitled thunder-summoning, cape-wearing, overbearing, self-proclaimed mighty asshole!" You glared at Thor, then turned back to Sam. "And then, finally see what y'all were doing as dust particles."

"Thor does have a point--" Fury cuts in, crossing his arms.

"Doesn't that leather trench coat get hot?" You point at it, because you were sure as hell not having this conversation again.

"Pierce may have been Hydra, but even he knew how messed up things would be if you were in the wrong hands--"

"You say that like I can shoot lightning bolts out of a gavel."

"It was a hammer." Thor grits out.

Fury ignores you both. "--things aren't as they used to be. The threats aren't only Thanos, Loki, or any other alien tyrant."

"That's mean. Thor isn't an alien." You feign a point.

"We need to consider the threats here, on Earth, as well." Thor ignores your jab. "Like, I've always been saying. The scale of destruction and terror that criminals could cause if they got a hold of just a small percentage of Hydra tech. Just look at what Ultron had accomplished--"

You stare blankly at the tower of a man in front of you. "You mean the computer upgrade that Tony created? With a weapon that is no longer on Earth, in this timeline? With Hydra tech from a Hydra lab, on that floating, vibranium powered island that you destroyed?"

"The point is--"

"I have lived in hiding my entire life," you narrow your eyes at the ignorant would-be-king. "Security protocols, safe houses, different identities, around-the-clock security, all of that bullshit that you're suggesting I know nothing about-- yeah, that was all I knew about. I know where every entrance and exit of every room I walk into is. I plan for an escape, before I even step foot out of my place.

"I did not come here so you can tell me how to continue living the lifestyle that I was raised to live--" You're glaring and baring your teeth and ready to rip him a new one. "--My keepers are dead. You will sooner change the nature of a cat, before you turn your little pride of vigilantes into my security detail."

He doesn't say anything. He can't. He knows better than to argue with you when you're like this; angry and on the verge of lashing out.

So, he just stares back at the idiot that won't stop haunting his every thought. The idiot that can wield a weapon he nearly died for. The idiot that won't understand why he bickers when it comes to her safety.

Sam sighs as he crashes on the couch. "At that's the tea."

Tags: @nekoannie-chan​, @thorfanficwriter​

#annie's1stwritingchallenge #annie's500kittieswritingchallenge #thor #thor fanfiction #writing challenge #mcu #marvel masterlist #thor x you #thor x reader #x you #x reader #reader insert #sam wilson #fury #mcu shadow

[epiphany-of-a-madwoman]

The Unexpected Perks of War | Daenerys Targaryen x Fem!OC

Part 3

Summary: Allys Baratheon is the only trueborn daughter of Robert Baratheon and Cersei Lannister. After the explosion of The Sept of Balor and the death of Tommen, Allys grew tired of the ghosts that hung in Kings Landing and set off to Dragonstone, hoping to find a semblance of safety.

Note: Masterlist for this series here🤍

The seconds tick by, time ebbing and flowing in its usual pace. Guard rotations shift, the evening meal is prepped, and the sun slowly lowers as the moon prepares to take its place. Yet, every passing moment feels like a century to Allys as she impatiently waits for the keep to go to sleep, everyone except Daenerys of course. 

She wandered through Dragonstone, gripping onto any distraction that would come with an iron tight hold. Her footsteps echoed through the ancient halls, fingers tracing along it’s walls so many times she’d be able to accurately sketch the keep from the inside out. She floated through conversations like a phantom, mind always halfway in the clouds. At one point, she’d ended up in the library, bundled in a corner with a book that looked moments away from falling apart. Her eyes scanned the ink, flipping the pages and actually managing to read through it, but she couldn’t tell you the first thing about the book, not even the title. But eventually, light turned to dark; the moon brilliantly glowing in the sky as it glistened off the waters surrounding Dragonstone. 

The soft sand sinks beneath Allys’ slippered foot, and for a second she contemplates taking the delicate silk shoes off, eager to feel the sand between her toes. She longs to feel like a child again who was too wild to be proper, always frolicking about the shore surrounding King’s Landing, not jaded by the atrocities of the world. Not stained with the knowledge of the horrible things her mother and uncle have done, the sins her grandfather committed in the name of a golden legacy. Momentarily lost in her melancholy, Allys almost does it, if only to feel like that naive child again, but the fearsome roar of a dragon pulls Allys from her reminiscing. 

Flying high above the ground, Drogon lets out a ferocious war, the sound reverberating in Allys’ ears and she could swear she felt the ground beneath her feet tremble. The dragon was massive and terrifying, in shades of red and black, the colors of House Targaryen, but he was beautiful in a dangerous way. And if the sun wasn’t already hidden away while the moon shines bright, he would no doubt blot it out. She’s captivated by him, as she is with all the dragons, but Drogon demands her attention. He’s the largest of the three, named after Daenerys’ late husband Khal Drogo, and if someone told Allys his very soul resides inside Drogon, she would believe them. All of the dragons fiercely protect their mother, but Drogon does it with a ferocity that only a Dothraki warlord could possess.

Her gaze however moves to the form on top of the dragon. She knows who it is without needing to see her face, there’s only one person here that could ride Drogon so freely. Drogon begins to lower towards the ground, and Allys subconsciously moves to meet where he’d land. She grabs onto her skirts, lifting them up as to avoid dirting anymore than necessary, and just walks, any nerves and fears about being burned alive banished from her thoughts. Daenerys would never let any of them do that to her.

Crash.

Drogon’s large form lands on the sandy ground, red eyes locking on Allys, opening his massive jaws and showing his razor sharp teeth that could rip her apart within seconds. But she’s not afraid. She continues her approach, the dampened sand squishing under her feet, water seeping through the silk shoes and onto her skin. Her eyes flit to Daenerys sitting on Drogon, looking every bit like the regal Dragon Queen she is. 

Her silver hair is pulled back into a series of braids, something Allys learned is a part of Dothraki culture, each strand curled and cascading down her back and spilling over her shoulders. Her bright purple eyes are already locked onto Allys, the harshness usually present in her War Room meetings replaced with a softness more akin to a child. Her pale skin glows in the moonlight, the stars casting beautiful highlights on all the right spots. Instead of her usual black and red attire, she’s wearing a dress in a light shade of blue, the fabric thick enough to fight any chill from the night air, but still breathable. Her signature three headed dragon broach is still pinned to her dress, holding in place her shimmering cloak that looks like dragon scales. A smile rests on her delicate face, filling Allys with all sorts of warm feelings.

She’s beautiful, by the Old Gods and the new, Allys is mystified by Daenerys and everything about her. 

Maintaining eye contact, Daenerys effortlessly slides off of Drogon’s back. Her feet hitting the ground with a soft thud. She moves towards Allys with the natural confidence she exudes, the easy charms she possesses always her biggest asset, only second to her dragons. In what feels like an eternity, Daenerys closes the distance between them. She’s close enough that Allys can clearly hear each breath she takes, but far enough away to be proper. And while she is only less than an arm’s length away, she feels like there’a a gaping canyon in between them.

“Thank you for meeting me tonight, Lady Allys,” Daenerys says, her voice like silk. 

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world, Your Grace,” Allies said, a teasing lilt in her voice. Her lips pull into a smile, bright enough to even blind the sun. The smile on Daenerys’ face widens as well. And if Allys’ smile is the sun, then Daenerys is the moon, captivating everyone with her soft and ethereal beauty.

“Shall we?” Daenerys says, guesting behind her towards Drogon, still in his same position, although he’s no longer baring his teeth and burning into Allys with his eyes. Her eyes widen a fraction, unsure what else to do.

“You mean we’re going to…?” Allys whispers, pointing at Drogon, hand low at her side as if she’s afraid the dragon in question will see. Daenerys looks behind her and then back at Allys, amusement brimming in her eyes, and she laughs. Not the quiet chuckle you give to Lords or Ladies from noble houses that you don’t want to offend, or the awkward squawk you make when in an uncomfortable situation. This is a real laugh, the kind that makes you throw your head back and close your eyes, that brings a pain to your stomach from laughing too hard. It’s loud, being carried away by the wind to every corner of Dragonstone, and it’s beautiful. 

In that moment Allys decides it’s the best sound she’s ever heard, that no minstrel, no matter how talented, could ever play a tune sweeter than this. 

“Yes, we’re going to ride Drogon.” Daenerys reaches out and grasps Allys’ hand. While Allys hands are cold and dry, her skin not accustomed to the weather, Daenerys’ are warm and soft, as if the fire in Drogon runs through her veins.  She turns and walks towards Drogon, pulling Allys, who doesn’t put up a fight, with her. Her heart is pounding against her chest, a blend of anxiety and excitement coursing through her blood. 

A dragon, a real dragon. She’s about to ride a dragon. 

She’s in a daze as Daenerys approaches Drogon, reaching her hand out to caress Drogon’s scaled face. He nuzzles into her touch, a pur similar to that of a cat coming from him as he nudges closer to her. The startling size difference between Daenerys’ hand and Drogon snout is enough to make Allys stop breathing, yet he isn’t acting like a terrifying beast. In fact, he’s more like a domesticated pet looking for attention than a fire breathing serpent, and that’s what keeps Allys in place. 

For a moment, she has a burst of bravery, a need to impress Daenerys, which causes her to step forward and reach her left hand out to Drogon. He turns his attention to her and huffs, the breath feeling like summer heat against her skin, but to her surprise, he leans his head forward. The feeling of his rough scales under her fingertips is…odd, he was as hot as Allys imagined he would be, similar to touch the barrier between a roaring hearth. Allys is at a loss, unsure of where to move her hand now that it rests on him, then she feels something soft and cool in comparison to Drogon over her hand. 

She glances over and meets Daenerys’ gaze, her smile isn’t as large and beaming anymore, instead it’s weeter, more delicate, as if she’s afraid that this moment could disappear. Allys knows because she feels the same. 

“Here, gently pet him here,” she says, guiding Allys’ hand in the center of his face and in between his serpentine eyes. She guides her hand down, as Allys’ nails lightly press into Drogon, who purs in delight, until her hand reaches the tip of his nose, inches away from his teeth. The tip of his nose is soft like that of a dog, but not as wet. It’s nice to feel a sensation that is familiar to Allys. 

“I can’t believe it, I’m petting a dragon!” Allys exclaims, nearly breathless from excitement. Her eyes are wide and wild, beaming with the radiance of the sun. Daenerys laughs, this was softer than her previous laughter, but just as sweet. 

“What would you say to riding a dragon?” 

And Allys can’t speak, her brain refusing to work hard enough to think of something to say. So instead she squeaks like a mouse, nodding her head far too enthusiastically to be proper. But Daenerys just laughs, taking the hand of Allys’ she still grasps, and leads her to one of Drogon’s wings, Daenerys getting on first and then holding a hand out to help Allys up. The feel of the leather wings are strange, similar to walking on the carpets and rugs in The Red Keep, but tougher and with a better grip.

Daenerys helps Allys get onto Drogon, making sure she is situated behind her. Instinctively, Allys wraps her arms around Daenerys’ waist, placing her chin atop Daenerys’ shoulder, the warm fabric soothing her frostbitten face. A flush appears on Allys’ face from the proximity, but just snuggles further into Daenerys, the anticipation of actually flying turning her stomach into knots. 

“Sōvēs.” 

Allys lurches forward, the sound of Drogon’s heavy footsteps beating into the beach. And they’re moving, slowly at first, but then quicker and quicker as Drogon picks up more momentum. Allys squeezes Daenerys just a hair tighter as Dany throws her head back, laughing in delight - the sound being swallowed by the howling wind. 

Just when they are about to hit the ocean surrounding Dragonstone, Drogon lifts his great wings and soars into the sky. The wind is cold and unforgiving, but Allys can’t bring herself to care, as the wind whips through her hair, instantly tangling it. The higher and higher they fly, the smaller everything looks below them. And Allys can’t help the shout that leaves her mouth, the sound mixing with the winds around them and the powerful roar Drogon releases. 

                                                       o0o0o0o

They fly around on Drogon for the next hour and Allys never wants it to end. But eventually, they begin to get closer and closer to the ground until Drogon lands with a thundering thud. Daenerys slides off of Drogon with ease, holding her hand out to aid Allys off of the dragon. When her feet finally touch solid ground, they wobble and shake, and if not for Daenerys holding onto her, Allys surely would’ve greeted the ground with her face. 

Flushing bright red with shaky hands and a racing heartbeat, Allys looks up at Daenerys. And Daenerys looks at her, cheeks stained red as well.  

“That was-- amazing. Thank you, so so much,” Allys says, still attempting to catch her breath, something highly unlikely with how close Daenerys is.

“It’s my pleasure.”

And then Daenerys takes one step closer, Allys mimicking her movements. Then suddenly they’re only a breath away from each other. And for the first time Allys truly notices how short Daenerys is compared to her. She always carries such a strong presence, Allys imagined her 9ft. tall in her mind. But she doesn’t mind. It makes Daenerys seem real, something difficult to picture for the woman who brought dragons back into the world.

“Well, I should probably return to my room,” Allys says, but makes no movement to move away. 

“Yes, it is rather late,” Daenerys says, the corner of her lips tugging into a smirk, mischief dancing in her purple eyes. 

With a second surge of courage, abandoning any fear and worry that lingers in her head, Allys leans forward, connecting their lips together. 

Kissing Daenerys is like taking a bite from the sweetest fruit. Euphoria rushes through her veins, her head growing lighter with each second. Her lips are soft and warm and oh so inviting to Allys. And if kissing Daenerys is like eating from the sweetest fruit, then her lips taste like nectar from the gods themselves. And Allys get pulled under, deeper and deeper into the ocean, not fearing that she doesn’t have the faintest idea on how to swim. 

And it's soft, gods it’s so soft Allys melts into her, getting as close as possible.

Daenerys weaves one arm around Allys and her other hand into the tangled mess her hair is, and begins gently untangling it. Allys puts one hand around Daenerys’ neck, as if she’s afraid she’ll disappear, trailing the other one from her waist up her side, then her collarbone, and finally up her neck, with a touch lighter than a feather. 

It’s pure bliss in that moment and in her haze Allys decided she must be dead. She must’ve died at some point and her heaven is every moment spent with Daeenerys. 

“Would you care to join me tonight, Lady Allys? I’m afraid I’m not used to the cold of Westeros and would welcome the company?” Daenerys is only a hair away from her, but even that feels too far. Too far gone in her euphoria, Allys forgets all about her pride, chasing Dany’s lips as she groans at the loss of contact. Daenerys allows her to kiss her again, laughing against her lips as Allys’ mouth swallows the noise. 

“Do you even have to ask?” Allys asks, still keeping their lips pressed together. “We should go now, while I’m still thinking semi clearly,” Allys mutters, but makes no movement to untangle herself from Daenerys. 

“Then let us make haste before we die from the cold!” Daenerys exclaims, pecking the corner of Allys’ lips before pulling her towards the entrance to Dragonstone. Allys laughs, the sound so foreign to her own ears, the sound nothing like the grief stricken tones she spoke with. They both nearly tumble to the ground far more times than either could keep track of, laughing louder and harder with each fumble. Neither of them seem to notice the sleeping people in the rooms they pass. They’re too drunk on each other to possibly care, only focused on the other. 

‘Perhaps we should be more quiet?” Allys suggests in between her laughter, small giggles bursting in the seams of her question. 

“It would be respectful of us, but I’m too happy to care!” Daenerys exclaims. And her eyes are bright, like two stars plucked from the sky and painted purple. It would be easier to liken her eyes to amethysts, but they wouldn’t do justice to their vibrancy.

And she’s beautiful when she’s like this, so carefree and glowing like the moon.

Eventually they reach the end of the hall, standing before two double doors. Back to the door, Daenerys leans forward, pressing a faint kiss against Allys, fumbling as she opens the door behind her. It clicks open and she presses her body against it to push it wide open, the loud creaking swallowed by their laughter. Daenerys pulls Allys into the room, the lock clicking close behind them. 

Maybe the dragons coming back to Westeros isn’t such a bad thing. 

                                                    o0o0o0o

Tags: 

@historicallydysfunctional​ | @stuckupstucky​

#daenerys targaryen x reader #daenerys targaryen imagine #daenerys oneshot #daenerys targaryen #daenerys stormborn #baratheon!reader #daenerys targaryen oneshot #game of thrones #game of thrones imagine #game of thrones fanfiction #game of thrones oneshot #Daenerys x Baratheon!reader #Daenerys Targaryen x Baratheon!OC

[shinyatiny]

Flower Crown - yungi

Chapter three: Stressful dining

__________________________________

On his way back home, Mingi was once again greeted by the busy villagers. Every passing villager had either stopped him for a quick chat or greeted him with an adoring smile. Mingi being Mingi, he smiled back awkwardly and told the villagers he was in a bit of a rush. The villagers understood him and let him be. He also saw the old woman who was still selling crystal water at her stand. She had brand new baskets of crystal water on the counter with a box full of gold coins at the very edge. The blonde was glad the woman was able to sell some of the crystal water jars.

Passing by the market, he made his way up the familiar hill and opened the wooden gate to his father's property. Some of the servants were already outside, trimming down some of the overgrown bushes next to the fence. Mingi nodded his head at the servants and made his way to the front door, giving a quick glance at the flower bed before going inside. The house was bustling with servants who ran through the hallways, some with fresh bed sheets, some with new clothes. The blonde elf waited for the perfect opportunity to slip past the servants to his own room, and when he saw no one in sight, his plan went into action immediately.

Luckily, he wasn't spotted by anyone, or if he was, he didn't see anyone. Quickly opening the door to his chambers, he slipped through the door and closed it behind him. With a sigh, he leaned against the door, a grin forming on his lips in victory. He glanced at the clock above his bed, which read '8:47'. He had exactly thirteen minutes for himself before he had to leave again. The idea of dining with his father in silence wasn't particularly to his liking, but he figured his father had something to discuss with him.

Mingi's room wasn't anything special, at least compared to Seonghwa's dreamy-like shop, but he was content with it. His bed took at least two-thirds of the space in his room, leaving room for a small wooden table and his stump chair under it for him to sit on. There was also a small shelf next to his window that was full of books, books about humans and other species. Mingi was extremely intrigued by their tales and whatnot, his head always between the covers of some book. His father had told him not to read so much about humans, but Mingi couldn't help his fascination with the unknown species.

With a quick glance at the bookshelf, he turned to his table in front of the bed. The wooden comb from this morning was still neatly placed on it, a half-full glass with water next to it. His eyes fixated on the mirror. Something clicked in his mind when he saw the mirror; he hadn't seen the piercing on his ear up-close. He only saw the earring before he had put it on his ear, but he hadn't seen it on himself. Intrigued by this, he made his way to the mirror, looking at his tired but bright figure.

The earring was indeed dangling from his earlobe, shining in the morning sun. His hand went up to his ear to touch the earring, cool against his fingers. It was a small chain with a tiny golden star at the very end of it. As soon as he had first seen the earring at Seonghwa's, he had taken a liking to it. It reminded him of his mother in the heavens, staring at him from the stars. It brought a melancholic smile onto Mingi's lips, but he was happy. Maybe it was the spell embedded into the piece of jewelry, or maybe it was genuine happiness, he didn't know. He wasn't sad, he was truly happy and content. The earring brought a lot of joy without him even noticing it.

And Seonghwa had been right, the earring genuinely made him look amazing. The silver-haired elf wasn't lying when he said Mingi would look hot wearing it. Shyly smiling to himself at the embarrassing memory, Mingi let go of the earring and glanced at his attire instead. In his opinion, he looked as best as he could, and he had no idea why his father disliked his current choice of clothing. Maybe he didn't like the silky open shirt Mingi wore that clearly showed his stomach, but like Mingi would care about his father's opinions.

He decided not to change his attire, although, his father would surely comment something about it later at breakfast. But Mingi simply didn't care. He peeked at the clock, almost panicking a little when he saw he had one minute to be in the kitchen with his father by his side. In a panicked rush, the blonde threw the door open and ran out of his room, sprinting through the hallways. Several bumps on servants and almost falling on the floor, he reached the kitchen. With a sigh, he peeked over at the empty kitchen, cursing in his head when his father was nowhere in sight. Maybe he had left when he saw Mingi wasn't coming.

Unfortunately, a tap on his shoulder crushed his childish wishes instantly. It was his father, standing proudly behind him with his magical staff in his left hand. The chief looked majestic as usual, his clothes telling everyone he was a high-ranking elf. Mingi grimaced at how his father was in such formal clothes, but he decided not to comment on it since he'd get yelled at anyway. The black markings on his father's face made him even more intimidating.

The older man raised a questioning eyebrow at Mingi, narrowing his eyes in suspicion. "You didn't change your clothes." He said, looking his son up and down as if he was closely studying him. Mingi gulped at his father's piercing stare, feeling as small as ever under his watch. His father scoffed and ignored the small whimper which left Mingi's lips, entering the kitchen. The blonde trailed behind his father, following him to the table.

Mingi hadn't even noticed the gorgeously set table when he visited the kitchen earlier. Now he could see all the divine food placed on the table. There were two chairs carefully placed on either side of the table, his father sitting on one of them. With quiet steps, he made his way to the other chair, carefully sitting on it, avoiding his father's eyes as best as he could. Two servants came in the kitchen with silver trays in their careful hands. Mingi watched as the two servants made their way to the table and set the two trays in front of them. One in front of Mingi and one in front of his father.

The servant bowed at Mingi and walked out of the kitchen with the other servant, closing the double doors behind them. As he was about to dig into his breakfast full of eggs and meat, his father coughed quite loudly, gaining Mingi's attention. The blonde elf turned his head to look at his father, and with cautious eyes, he met his father's fierce ones. "I heard you left somewhere this morning." He said with a strong tone in his voice. His eyes didn't even quiver as he stared at his son. "Where were you?" He asked, sending a wave of shock through Mingi's body. "Were you with that friend of yours?" The way the word 'friend' slipped past his father's lips wasn't warm at all, it was as if his father hated the silver-haired elf.

With a small nod, Mingi could feel the burning stare of his father intensify. He wanted to bury himself underground right at that moment, hating the fact his father was judging him. The older man let out a scoff, banging his fist against the table, not hard enough to break the wooden table, but it was enough to scare the younger elf. "Mingi." He said, the sharp tone of his voice slicing Mingi's heart like butter. "You have other things to do than be with that — that freak. He's manipulating you into thinking those piercings are good-looking on you, they are not. They look sinful on your body, I'd advise you to take all of them out and throw them to the bottom of the lake." He stated, taking his fist off the table and wiping his mouth with a tissue.

Mingi looked at his lap with pursed lips, contemplating his next words carefully. It wasn't easy to counter his father's words, in fact, it was almost impossible since the hurtful words dag too deep into his heart. But he was the chief's son, and he didn't like the way he was treated by his own father. He wanted to say something in return so badly, he wanted to tell him that Seonghwa wasn't manipulating him — that he wasn't a 'freak' like his father had worded out. But Mingi knew his father had something very important to discuss, so he decided against it. "Yes, father." He simply said, voice almost inaudible.

An ugly smirk formed on his father's lips, making Mingi grimace even more. With a nod, his father mouthed a small 'good' and continued with his dish for a few minutes. The blonde elf had lost his appetite, poking the piece of meat with his fork, thoughts somewhere they probably shouldn't be right now. He heard his father's content hums, indicating he was ready with the meal. The younger elf raised his head to look at his father, careful eyes focusing on his father. "Now, I have something important to say to you. As you know, the Lenaia festival is very close. It is to be held in three days." He said sternly, looking straight at his son. "I have decided that you are participating as well."

As soon as Mingi had heard those words, his world froze around him. His father had decided that he was to join the fighting arena? He had decided that even though he knew how much Mingi hated violence, talking about fighting. The blonde elf stared at his father in a daze, his words looping inside his head. Had he heard him wrong? "I — but-" He tried, his words getting stuck in his throat as much as he tried to speak. The older man rolled his eyes in annoyance. "You know how much I hate violence, father. How could you?" He said, voice wobbly and dry from shock.

"Of course I know you don't like fighting, but you are a powerful elf, Mingi. I'm positive you'll show the other tribes our power." Mingi's father said, relaxing into his chair. "You'll show everyone what the Iris clan is capable of." He smiled, glancing at Mingi who was still frozen in one place, eyes wide as plates. "Come on, it can't be that hard on you to participate in a little fighting festival, can it? You'll see when everyone is cheering on you."

The anger inside Mingi only grew bigger as his father kept talking, his ears blocked every other sound except his father's voice and his own rapid heartbeat in his chest. The way his father kept boasting about their clan's power made him boil with hatred, he wanted to yell, shout at the older man. He wanted to say something, but his own words failed him, he couldn't say even a single word as an excuse for not fighting. The older elf looked at Mingi with a raised eyebrow, a laugh leaving his lips right after. Something in the younger snapped at that. He stood up from the chair, taking a deep, collected breath before exploding. "I will not — I repeat — I will not fight. You have no right to force me to fight, you can't. I'm your goddamn son. You know how much I hate fighting in general, I have never touched a weapon in my life, so how can you do this to me? How can you decide on something like that without even asking me about it? How — how could you?"

His father stared at him in shock, mouth hanging open. His expression shifted from confused to angry, a crease forming between his thick eyebrows. He, too, stood up from his chair and made his way to Mingi with slow, anguishing steps. The blonde elf watched as his father stopped in front of him, eyes fixated on him, never letting his eyes go. The second Mingi was about to say something, his father beat him to it. Before he knew it, a slap echoed in the dining room, a red mark on Mingi's cheek being the only evidence of what just happened. It was quick, but enough to shake Mingi to his core. His father had just slapped him.

"Before you talk to me like that, think about it. I am your father and the leader of this village, this tribe, this big clan. You have no right to speak to me like that, even if you're my son, I do not tolerate behavior like this." The older elf scoffed. "Go to your room to think about your mistakes, Mingi. I will have guards fetch you in three days to get you ready for the festival, whether you liked it or not."

Without saying another word, his father left the dining room, leaving Mingi alone in total silence with a red handprint on his right cheek.

#ateez #atiny #fanfiction #writing #yungi #ateez yungi #cute #elves

[brightsun-and-darkmidnight]

A Touch of Lost Time

TITLE: A Touch of Lost Time

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: chapter 2 / ?

AUTHOR: brightsun-and-darkmidnight

ORIGINAL IMAGINE: For the Val's 500 challenge for ABO prompt.

@marvelgirlonamarvelworld

RATING:  Explicit.

NOTES/WARNINGS: ABO au. Mates. Knotting.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: 

Loki

1- voice -she can literally tell him to do anything

2- touch -how they touch will set the other up for arousal. (In the beginning they can barely hold hands. They seem very distant in public and it is odd for everyone to see them barely dance with the other.)

3- sight -her eyes relax him.

4- smell -loves to have her close so he can smell her. He especially loves her scent when she doesn't know he is there. She gets too worked up when he touches her and all he can smell is her heat.

5- taste -has no effect on him. It is a sense of touch so he likes it but only marks her for claims.

Character Katla

1- sight -as she is the omega his looks, his body language, will tell her everything she needs to know about how he is thinking.

2- touch -how they touch will set the other up for arousal. (In the beginning they can barely hold hands. They seem very distant in public and it is odd for everyone to see them barely dance with the other.)

3- smell -his scent relaxes her. Even if he is aggressive. Especially if he is defending her.

4- taste -she loves to taste his skin, especially when he is scenting her and even more so after he was working out. (He bares more marks from her than she has of his. It's odd for an alpha to be marked so much...especially since they do not touch the other in public) 

5- voice -"such a shame we need permission to continue.' Has no outstanding effect on her but his voice sounds like heaven and is soft velvet on her ears.

My Ao3: brightsun_and_darkmidnight

*FINALLY..Read the warnings. Once you agree you can handle it...

 ~ ~ ENJOY  ~ ~

Katla and Loki had to reapply the lotion before the dinner. She did not mind the touches but it was annoying that was both of their mating sense and it had such an effect on her. His scent was relaxing and she looked forward to being in his bed as a mate.

Loki smiled at her as the back of his hand went up her arm. "What sinful thoughts cross your mind?"

Katla blushed, "stop it."

Loki smirked as he leaned close in a teasing way. "I need to know to fulfill your desires."

Katla was tempted to taste him but Frigga said there was not a suitable lotion for lips… something about accidental consumption numbing the insides and ceasing their functions. Katla smelled him, the nature scents must be natural and the book smell evidence of how his time was spent. Everything was warm and inviting. The fact he smelt like he wanted to scent her, and his attempts to do so with her arms, made her forget about their differences in attire and social standings.

Nothing mattered to her. Well, other than the time spent with him. It was as if the world stopped just for them to have these moments.

An Einherjar walked into the area with a bow. "Prince Loki. Lady Katla. You are expected in the dinning hall. Immediately."

The reality of the world set in place as the trance ended with an ache in her chest.

She was nervous, hoping that this would go well and she could see her pack after the discussions… Loki held her hand until they had to part.

Katla sat next to her leader. "Hello father."

He nodded in acknowledgement. "I am happy to see you are unmated." He then looked to Loki. "You had no right to take her."

Loki rose an eyebrow. "You rather she be taken by a rogue Alpha instead of me? -Her true Alpha? I did what I needed to protect her."

"Then you should have escorted her back to our home until this talk."

Loki spoke evenly with composure but Katla noticed Loki's eyebrows angled slightly and his body shifted forward. "Do you have access to suppressants to cover her heat in order for her to get here under your protection?"

Her father growled. "You assume we are not capable of caring for her due to us not having sorcery?"

Katla looked to her lap as she played with a stain on her dress. Her father hated Seder with a passion… and Loki was known for it. The silence took place as the two starred in challenge. Katla looked to Loki and sensed he would gladly use his seder to tear her father apart…

Katla whispered, "Loki, please… don't."

Loki glanced at her then back to her father. He sat back and held his head high. "Katla wishes to maintain contact with your pack."

Her father scoffed. "She is too much to handle now and it will only get worse as she is changed from being here among the elite. She hardly worked as it was. She never listened to me so goodluck with her. I will take the money and leave her here. None of us will bother you."

Katla stared heartbroken at her father, her emotions getting the better of her, her lip trembled and warm tears flowed down her cheeks. She looked to Elisk who looked devastated as well. His hand fisted on the table as he glared at her father.

Loki was tense as he tried to reason. "I leave the option for other members to visit her. She will not be kept from her family."

Her father casually ate as he spoke, "No one will bother with her anymore."

Elisk rose with a yell, "I will still see her! You don't get to decide for everyone if the option is ours to make."

Katla's father disgusted her as he ate more, unfazed by the conversation. As usual no one else was eating from her pack. "I am the leader of this pack. And I say no one will bother with her no longer." He even had the audacity to point a knife at Loki, "I will take 4 bags of golden coins."

Katla's mouth opened in shock. There was no way Loki would pay that much.

Odin spoke up. "Is there anyone else who wishes to maintain contact with the Omega?"

Katla looked to her siblings, mother, and the others she thought cared about her… no one else spoke one word. Her face scrunched up as her chest constricted. Was she really such a problem for everyone?

Elisk remained standing. "I will say it again. I will still talk to Katla."

Loki spoke glaring at her father. "You will have your coin sent to you. Now get out. Elisk, you may stay."

Her father took a large chunk of meat as he stood. "Nice discussion. Have fun with the useless dimwit."

Loki's chair was pushed back as he stood, falling backwards from the speed in which he stood. The harsh thud echoed through the room but Loki's voice was louder. "The deal is made and I will not give you more than what you asked. But know this-she is priceless. Worth more to me than anything in the world."

Katla stared at Loki. His scent flooded her nose in the scent of scorched forest.

Her old leader shrugged, taking a bite. Speaking while chewing. "I should have asked for more coin then."

Katla's old pack stood and walked away in a hurry after her supposed father. Elisk however stayed and stared between everyone. He called for Katla who was in a daze of painful emotions. She had hoped Odin was wrong about her pack selling her away, but he was right.

Loki held his hand out to Katla and her shaking hand was gripped by Loki. He held her close to his chest, his anger rolling off of him and replaced slowly with the relaxing smell of a field of overgrown weeds.

Loki spoke to Elisk over Katla's head, his voice a low rumble in his chest. "I will send guards with you. A carriage will be sent to your living area. You are to pack Katla's important items, as well as what you need as well. I will find you a job here."

Katla looked up to Loki to see if he meant it,  thankful he was serious. Elisk nodded with a quick thanks as he left. Loki looked down to her, a cloth in hand as he wiped her tears away. "I promised I would do my best."

Katla sniffled as she clung to Loki, trying to burrow into him. "Thank you. So much, it means more than words can explain."

Thor spoke up after remaining silent for so long. "It is good you found your mate Loki, although as awkward as that agreement was, it was not either of your faults."

Frigga smiled. "Agreed. Now let's try to enjoy our meal. I think a proper feast will do everyone good. It is a shame the others did not eat."

Katla sat down as Loki motioned to a chair, "it is normal with my pack. The leader starts, then down the levels get to eat first." She felt everyone looking at her and she knew she was smaller than what was healthy.

Loki's growl was caught in his throat. "You will never go away from a meal hungry ever again."

Katla nodded as she tentatively took her first bite. She waited for someone to lash out at her. Instead she saw small smiles from Frigga and Thor. Loki gave her a strange smile as she took another small bite. She ate slowly with fear slowly edging away from no punishment of eating with her new pack. However she was done eating far earlier than the rest as her stomach was overfilled with delicious foods. She couldn't help herself from eating so much. It had been too long since she had a full stomach, her hunger was beyond satisfied.

Odin paused eating to look to his mate. "Frigga. I assume you can give the new pair suppressants for tomorrow?"

Katla watched as Frigga wiped her mouth on a napkin. "Yes. It can be done. I think a few rarer remedies will need to be stocked. Their complex senses will need a special set of suppressants for daily use." Katla looked to Loki in question but he just cut the food with a little more vigor.

Odin nodded. "Very well. Get it done. Tomorrow the ceremony of the paired mates will be held."

Katla looked to Loki who seemed annoyed now. However, he kept eating. 

Katla wanted Loki's touch like nothing she has ever experienced before. She was annoyed with having to wait for the official ceremony but was that the reason Loki was irritated? Frigga did say something about rare suppressants being used… Loki seemed to get irritated about that time...

Katla looked at the queen and then to her lap, her dress an absolute mess compared the extravagant dress the Queen had on. Was Katla going to wear dresses like that?

Frigga smiled. "Seamstresses are working to gather materials to make a dress for your special night. Loki will escort you to a room for the night. A long day is ahead of us all."

#val’s500challenge #brightsun-and-darkmidnight #a touch of lost time #chapter 2 #writing challenge #a/b/o universe #A/B/O verse #a/b/o au #a/b/o #alpha loki

[thebiasrekkers]

Star of Fate [Vampire!VIXX]

Plot: The longer you stare into darkness, the more you realize that something could be staring back. Even more so when that darkness doesn’t want to be brought into the light and will do anything to stay that way.

Rating: NC-17 // NSFW

Genre: Series | Vampire!AU | Angst | Romance/Fluff | Smut

Pairings: OT6 VIXX x OC(s)

Warnings: Graphic Violence (bloody violence), Heavy Language, Angst, Slow Burn, Smut

Additional Warnings: Office Microaggressions | Bullying | Toxic Work Environment

Previous Chapters: Prologue

Links: FAQ || VIXX Masterlist || Admin L’s AO3 || Admin L’s WP || [ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ]

Word Count: 2,682

AO3 | WP

Tag List: If you would like to be added to this list, just drop us an ask!

AN: So…I know we said this was coming soon and I’m very sorry that this got started so late! I hope to have this out every two weeks, maybe more depending on the future. So please give this a lot of love and we hope you enjoy the ride!

Chapter 2- The Ghost Woman and the Hunter

Calling on your sins you're here in my dreams a desert place I'm not alone Do you really want to be me?

Her eyes popped open, the realistic feeling of falling completely disorienting her as she shot up from her bed. It had felt so real to her that her body jerked itself awake. Light danced its way in through the blinds, chasing away all signs of shadow. Never had she been so glad that she hadn’t purchased black out curtains than in that moment. She needed to see the sun and all of its glory to help the dream fade away into existence. Well, at least certain parts of it. There was a wistful part of her that still wished that she could be on that dance floor again with the handsome and darker skinned man. 

“Oh my….FUCK!”

Lucky yelled as she looked over to her alarm clock, realizing that it was the source of the chimes that she heard in her dream. Throwing off her covers, she scrambled to get half-way put together so that way she wouldn’t be late to her job. She even called a cab to get her there faster which was unlike her normal routine. Unless there was inclement weather, of course. 

During the ride, she kept an eye on her phone--it lighting up every few seconds as she checked the time. She made it to her desk just in time to receive the stack of papers from some of the other people there. Normally she wasn’t such a space case, even showing up early to get whatever else she missed the previous day. Lucky was a hard worker, nobody could deny that but it was that fact others exploited hence the reason why the stack seemed to get larger and larger by the week. The world of office politics seemed to be much like high school but it paid well enough for her to put up with the majority of it. 

She straightened out her hair as best as she could with it being so long and settled down to start on her work. Most of it had been reports that she had to pencil push and correct, which was easy enough for her because all the information had been just sitting there inside of her head. However, the more difficult stuff came along when the Vice-President stuck his fingers into everything. She couldn’t help but groan when she looked at some of them, saving the majority of them for last so that way she could take extra time on them. 

“Job finally getting to you, Leonora?”

Lucky didn’t realize how long she had been working on them until the voice pulled her out of the zone she had settled into. Turning around, she saw another coworker standing right behind her with a slight smile on her face. No matter how many times she tried to be friendly to some of them, they insisted on resisting any attempts at professionalism and decorum. Well, unless someone higher up was around. Not to mention the fact that they also insisted on calling her by her government name instead of the nickname that she preferred. She gave the sweetest smile she could muster and stood up, green eyes twinkling. 

“Oh, there you are Nancy! I got so caught up in fixing your mistakes that I forgot to give you this folder back! Everything in there should be up to date now and I even took the liberty of sending off the final draft for you. It was the least I could do since I was the last one that had hands on it. You’re welcome.”

She gaped at Lucky for a moment and flipped open the folder to read what she had fixed. Nancy’s ears started to go red and her thin lips flattened as she pressed them together in anger. Lucky raised an eyebrow at her reaction, knowing that she saw what had been edited by her. It had only been a few mistakes but they were some that would have made their department look bad. Plus Lucky also added her name to the document as one of the contributing factors, more so because she went through the trouble of fixing everything. 

“I hope this teaches you to quit pushing your work off on me, Nancy. Have a good day.”

Lucky turned away from her and sat back down at her cubicle, leaving the sputtering woman there to be embarrassed. Even though she had her own computer there, they all had shared files that they could all access and she lived up to her nickname that she had the time to quickly edit everything before emailing it out. It had been one of the rare times that she was able to stick it to them and it honestly made her feel a sliver of satisfaction at the situation. 

Because she was just a little bit petty. 

The sudden ringing of her phone took her away from the moment, the voice of her boss calling for her. Lucky was a bit confused as she looked at the time as she wondered why he had reached out so early. It normally was after lunch that she would meet up with him to go over various things pertaining to her new position. Lucky had been promoted to be the Personal Assistant for the Vice President. Naturally, he had more than one that would work together with him being at such a high level but most of them had quit because of various rumors of his misogyny and unrealistic ideals. Hell, she was even friends with one of them when she found out that she no longer worked there. Rumors circulated with her leaving and even more when she was appointed in her stead. 

Now, Lucky was one of the very few left so that meant that she had been picking up a lot more work than normal. Not that she went out much anyways with the amount of work she had. 

She walked the halls to his office, only to be greeted by the desk clerk. The tiny lady handed her a folder and suggested she find something appropriate to wear. Confused, Lucky looked through the folder and saw that there were some instructions as well as some papers with details on the new VIP’s that they had recently joined with. 

“What the actual hell? Does he expect me to drop everything that I’m doing to go to this event with him? After hours, no less?”

The lady just shrugged and went back to her work. Lucky could feel her indignation rising but left before causing a scene. It was one thing if it was an actual work trip that she had to attend but that had been some sort of event to flaunt and rub elbows. There wasn’t a real reason why she needed to be there so why all the preparation? She returned to her desk and went through the folder in detail. The only promise that she would receive was an extra amount in pay if she went, something that actually interested her. She grumbled as she leafed through it but decided that it was just for one night and that if it happened again, she would put a stop to it. The bright side to it had been that she could take off early to prepare for the event. That was always something she could look forward to especially that day since she moved like hell to get there on time. 

The one person that she could freely talk to in the office came up to her with a grin on her face. She had originally been offered the position but declined it because of family reasons but she was nice to talk to regardless. 

“So Lucky.. I heard from a little bird that you’re going to the VIP event tonight with Mr. Randall.” She wiggled her eyebrows and elbow at her while Lucky just scoffed. 

“Yeah, I guess. I wonder how in the hell does crap go around here so fast? It’s like the freaking flu!” 

“You don’t sound so enthusiastic about it.”

“Ashleigh, I really don’t want to go but they’re promising extra pay this time if I do. I haven’t been sleeping well lately and now I gotta go to this… grandstandin’ event. I wish someone else could go.”

Her coworker leaned thoughtfully on the cubicle wall before leaning down to whisper. It was only times like that when they would get a bit of privacy. 

“You could always quit and get some more sleep? I heard that the other assistant quit as well. I thought, at first, that you had too when you didn’t arrive when you usually do. They’re saying that the abuse from the VP is to blame.”

“Yeah well, tell the handsome man in my dreams to quit bothering me so I can go by to my normal schedule and ignore some of these chickens.” Lucky’s hand motioned like a beak as they both had a laugh over that before returning back to work. However, Ashleigh’s words stuck with her. The VP hadn’t been shy about voicing his displeasure to her about various things, even requesting that she cut her hair but she respectfully declined his request. All she stated was that it was within the guidelines of the company and left it at that. Something that didn’t win her any favors. 

And if the other girl quit too, then the sinking feeling in her gut proved to be more of an ominous feeling. Either way, she would have to go and see how it played out. 

When time came for her to leave early, Lucky instead went shopping for appropriate attire for that night’s event. Even neatly braided her hair to keep it out of her face. Simple, neat and just a tad bit sexy in the red dress. Once satisfied with her result, she waited outside for the driver to come around and pick her up. Upon seeing the expensive car, Lucky suppressed a shudder when the door was opened to reveal Mr. Randall. It wasn’t necessarily seeing her boss after hours but more of a combination of the car and him. Small vehicles caused her a bit of stress since she was involved in an accident many years ago. Since then, normally she would either take the bus or bike when the weather was nice. 

Thankfully, her boss wasn’t too interested in making small talk with her once they got on the road. The city was left behind soon and various gas stations and trees zoomed by them. She didn’t put too much thought into it until the driver turned onto a long, paved road after a set of gates. The mansion that appeared made Lucky’s eyebrows shoot up, something picking at her brain. She couldn’t quite figure it out but it was as if she had seen that place before. She had to shake those thoughts from her head as she concentrated on remembering the information that was given to her earlier that day. 

Knowledge was power and she needed it to navigate that world if she didn’t want to embarrass or otherwise offend anyone. 

Upon exiting the car and entering the elaborate place, Lucky felt all the eyes in the world stare at them. Putting on a gracious face, she walked slightly behind her boss as they were greeted by some of the others there. A few moments chatting with some of them, she soon found herself alone in the area while the others mingled. She wasn’t anyone of importance and therefore not worthy of anyone’s time, for the moment. She would let her boss do all the talking. 

Lucky gravitated towards the hors d'oeuvres while everyone talked among themselves. Plucking a few to put on a plate, she watched the room for any sign that she would be needed. Several of the clients that were in the folder she received were there and they were laughing alongside everyone else. A couple even approached her, asking questions about the company and trying to get a little information from her about how to deal with her boss. She couldn’t honestly say anything to help in that situation because she usually just listened to him bark his orders before correcting anything she needed to. 

She was left alone for another time, only appearing at her boss’ side when needed as the night went on. Soon she felt herself grow tired of all the people and the politics of said beings. Lucky had several drinks before that point and was in the process of acquiring another when a voice nearly made her jump out of her skin. 

“They’re almost like vultures, are they not?”

She looked around and up at him as he was much taller than her, even in heels. The man knew he was handsome, smiling prettily at her as he held up his own glass of red wine in a toast. Lips full and round eyes, Lucky had to appreciate his looks before replying. 

“Well, I wouldn’t say that in particular.”

He gave a wide smile, eyes almost disappearing as they snickered at the rest of them. Lucky found herself talking more and more to the man who seemed just as bored as she was with the party. The more that she looked at him, the more that he seemed familiar to her and it dawned on her that he was one of the men from the folder. He had a nice voice, a bit higher than most of the men there but he didn’t hide it one bit. 

Lucky also noticed that the attention had been drawn to them just from them standing and talking to one another. He introduced himself as Jaehwan and they talked for another 15 minutes, slipping into easy conversation to keep themselves entertained. His jokes nearly had her spilling her drink, the folder not at all correct with the man before her. He was one of three men with his business, including one brother that rotated about in their company. 

Still, even with the jokes and the amicable banter between the both of them--her boss found that he had only missed the presence of Mr. Lee before her. 

“Ah. Leonora, I didn’t realize you had monopolized Mr. Lee’s time here tonight.” Her shorter framed boss then looked to Jaehwan with an apologetic look on his face, “Otherwise I would have saved you sooner!” Mr. Randall gave a laugh, expecting Jaehwan to laugh with him but didn’t. It surprised Lucky that her new friend didn’t go along with him on that but only sighed, looking to her in apology before speaking. 

“Leonora? And you said you were Lucky…” He grinned at her, ignoring her boss. She could see Randall’s face that he was growing annoyed, a face that showed up when things didn’t go his way. 

“Oh that’s just my assistant’s nickname that she tells everyone to call her even though we should be more professional. I’m her boss, Nicolas Randall. Vice-President of Nexus Assurance.” He held out his hand to shake but Jaehwan kept grinning at Lucky. His eyes suddenly were hyper focused on her, the doe eyed look that he did have--dissolved away. Almost like he had found something he really wanted.

“Uh well, I’ve been known to be lucky--hence the nickname.” She nervously laughed, highly aware that the tension was rising. Her eyes darted between Jaehwan as he continued to ignore her boss and the latter as he was getting more upset that the scene was even happening. That strange and ominous feeling was back, churning about the contents of her stomach. Jaehwan slowly turned from the friendly and open persona that he had while it was just the two of them, to something a bit more aggravated the longer her boss was there. There was a glint in his eyes that suggested something unfriendly was fighting its way out. 

Suddenly Jaehwan blinked rapidly before excusing himself but not before taking her hand and kissing it. Bewildered, Lucky watched him weave expertly through the crowd before taking a peek at her boss. 

And he was not pleased. 

#thekpopnetwork #kwritersworldnet #kwordsmiths #vixx #vampire!vixx #ot6 #thebiasrekkers presents #star of fate #Cha Hakyeon #jung taekwoon #lee jaehwan #Lee Hongbin #kim wonshik #San Sanghyuk

[clansayeed]

Things Worth Keeping, or the Annual Raines Corp. Fourth of July Charity Gala

PAIRING: Kamilah Sayeed x MC (Nadya Al Jamil)

⥼ Summary ⥽

Kamilah takes great care in preserving some of the more sentimental articles of clothing she's acquired over the years. Nadya realizes she might have a historical costume kink.

word count: 2,775 rating: teen+ content warnings: language, brief political discourse, implied sexual undertones, implied kink

⥼ MASTERLIST ⥽ 

So it turns out every time there’s an event that requires Kamilah’s attendance (specifically requires, since the Awakening Ball was both some weird vampire-political obligation and her wanting to see Marcel again) the mannequins come out.

Only for costume events though.

Or… she’s decided ‘every’ just because what are the chances she’s lucky enough to behold the sight of Kamilah Sayeed in period wear twice in one year? Apparently very good, very good indeed.

The vampire takes it upon herself to explain while fussing with a few collars and sleeves rumpled in transit. Nadya takes it upon herself to listen intently — takes everything in her willpower not to take notes. “Indeed one comes to terms rather early on that all objects are replaceable and their worth is only what the owner projects upon them,” which is quite a lot judging by the little smile Nadya sees peeking at the corner of Kamilah’s lips as she works, “and because I have had the misfortune of losing things I once coveted, I see no harm in preserving that which has stayed with me.”

Nadya adjusts her seat on the couch; makes sure the lid on her travel mug is secure otherwise she’ll never be allowed to drink in the front room again. “Is that a really fancy way of saying ‘I think it’s really pretty and I want to keep it that way?’”

Kamilah goes still. Not the tense kind of still that makes Nadya want to stuff her words back in her mouth but the kind of still she’s come to understand will reap very wise rewards. If she’s patient enough.

She’s learning to be patient enough.

“I suppose if you wish to bring the sentiment down to the simplest terms… yes.”

And oh man even that little agreement has Nadya buzzing excited.

“I’m so excited — this is gonna be so much fun!”

“What it will be, Nadya, is a gross exaggeration more akin to a serial drama than the real thing.”

“Wow, grumpy pants. Where’s your sense of patriotism?”

“In the same gutter as the ideals on which this nation was founded.”

Okay, fair point. But that brings up a very good series of questions all scrambling to make themselves heard. Which goes about as well as it always does and leaves Nadya tongue-tied and mute.

More than a few times Kamilah throws subtle looks in Nadya’s direction. Totally discreet and casual — done while circling a dress here, adjusting a cravat there. And each time she asks some variation of “Are you sure this is how you wish to spend your evening?” Nadya gives her the same answer.

“There’s nowhere else in the world I’d rather be.”

The final time Kamilah is just close enough to turn crisp on her heel and bring them face to face. Her deep honey eyes roam Nadya’s face and spare no detail; like she’s one of those pretty dresses Kamilah’s kept after all these years.

It makes Nadya feel small and big, whole down to the tips of her toes but also just a sliver in Kamilah’s long long life. Which is a lot to feel for someone of her size. Maybe too much.

Cool, soft lips on her forehead force Nadya to open eyes she didn’t know she was squeezing shut. No longer scrutinizing, now the vampiress allows them both a rare glimpse behind the mask. To the concern she guards close and reserves for those she cares about.

Adrian, Gerard, Marcel… Nadya.

She cares about me that way. Holy cow.

“You truly mean that.” Kamilah says and it isn’t a question. Kamilah isn’t in the business of asking stupid questions to which she knows the answers — that’s Nadya’s ball game.

“Of course I do.”

“Forgive my surprise.”

“Always.”

It’s just a kiss. People kiss all the time, all over the world. But those people aren’t Nadya and they aren’t kissing Kamilah so they couldn’t possibly know how wonderful and important and loved each one makes her feel.

Along with all the other things that make her squeak when they part. It’s impossible to miss that look in Kamilah’s gaze.

“While I enjoy your company immensely Nadya… I may have to ask you to leave,” even though the trace of her finger over Nadya’s lips kind of contradicts that, “as I do have to attend a conference call before the night is through.”

Nadya doesn’t even care that her pout is a little childish. “I thought you took the day off for this.”

“I took a half day for this. You were the one who insisted on losing an entire night’s productivity to help me choose my attire.”

“I’ll be quiet?” There’s no harm in trying, right? Thankfully Kamilah still seems more amused than anything.

“You misunderstand.”

Does she, though, because there are only so many ways to take the sudden closeness. Kamilah’s hands braced atop the back of the couch pinning Nadya between the cushion and her permanence, the contradictory darkness in her bright eyes with their lowered lashes, and oh my god that smirk…

Then Kamilah’s leaning in to whisper in her ear and she’s just—just jello, absolute jello. “I had hoped to be finished by now, yet I keep finding myself distracted.”

Jello or not though Nadya will always be Nadya.

“I—I can leave, if… if that’s what you want.” I know work is important to you. I know schedules are important to you even though your organizational methods are outdated and frankly anxiety-inducing. I know you have a lot to get done and only so many hours of moonlight to do it…

Kamilah doesn’t answer. Instead just taps the underside of Nadya’s chin with her pointer finger and gives a smile in reward when the human lifts her head obediently.

“What do you want, Nadya?”

You know what I want, she would normally say, but if she did then all their… all their training would be for nothing. And don’t memories of that (as recent as, uhm, three in the afternoon today) make her zone out somewhere over Kamilah’s shoulder.

Seven mannequins; still headless, still creepy. Four beautiful ballgowns and a priceless Egyptian kalasiris†, a definitely custom-tailored zoot suit, and…

Holy broad stripes and bright stars.

“I asked you a question.”

Oh yeah, she’s definitely wearing that.

Kamilah doesn’t have to remind her twice. Nadya leans forward what little she can; basks shamelessly in the one thing in the entire world she knows she’s earned—

The way Kamilah looks at her with absolute pride.

“You. I want you.”

Its so fulfilling to see all her hard work come together in one place, on one night, and with the promise of fireworks to come. There’s just something about fireworks. She loves ‘em.

Jax lets out his fifth heavy and long-suffering sigh of the minute. A personal best, but Nadya’s having too much fun to ruin the night by telling him.

Unfortunately her hoop skirt makes it hard to sidle up for a hip-check. Cue sigh number six.

“You know I’m technically the hostess for this thing, right?”

“Are you saying you’re the person I complain to?”

She huffs. “No, I’m saying that your grumpy face is personally offending me.”

She can’t tell if he’s purposefully avoiding her eyes out of spite or shame — then a roaring yelp of laughter from the dance floor draws Nadya’s attention out to where Lily and Maricruz spin fast-paced and free; held together by just their hands and their shared looks of ‘I couldn’t care less where I am so long as it’s with you.’

At least that gets a little smile out of Mr. Grumpy-Pants.

A costumed server stops at the pair of them and offers his tray of goodies up like sin. Nadya spares two quick glances over either shoulder — thankfully Adrian has donors to schmooze and Kamilah hasn’t arrived yet — before she plucks a cheese cube carved in the shape of the Liberty Bell.

But it isn’t enough that Jax has to act so unhappy the entire gala — now he’s stealing her snack and eating it himself?! Where’s my purse, where’s my stake?!

What else can she do but gape? He doesn’t even have the decency to look ashamed, just chews and chews and swallows while trying to ease the itch in his legs caused by the borrowed hose.

“Lily warned me you might make bad choices.”

So what? I’m a grown woman, I can make bad choices if I want to. “Are all of you in on some big conspiracy to keep me from cheese?”

“If it’ll spare you future pain, yeah.” Which — she wasn’t expecting that. Nadya can’t help but feel her face soften. One look down her way though and he rolls his eyes. “Stop it.”

“You hate my party. You steal my cheese. What’s next, burning my crops and delivering a plague onto my house?”

Jax looks appalled — which is a real shame. That would have gone over so well with Lily. “I—what?!”

Nadya just waves it off though. “Forget it. Just…” oh hey look, time for her own sigh, “forget it.”

“It’s not you. It’s these tights.”

“They’re hose.”

“They itch.”

“Imagine wearing them all the time.”

Nadya is totally enjoying her frilly not-period-accurate-in-the-slightest ensemble but of course Adrian is the only one who looks really right in his whole get up. It’s a good thing he has to wear modern suits and styles or else he’d be pegged for a vampire right away.

Her boss pulls her in for a one-armed hug, expertly outmaneuvering the skirt but he probably has experience with that, huh? And his smile only widens as he takes in Jax in all his colonial glory.

“They were good in the winter, obviously. Though I’ll admit once I didn’t feel the weather anymore the discomfort really presented itself as a problem.”

Jax just rolls his eyes. “Why do I feel like you throw this thing just to say shit like that?” Which— she can tell he’s trying to be sarcastic but Adrian definitely goes tense beside her.

“I ‘throw this thing,’ as you say, because my own personal wealth can only go so far, and most of it is immaterial. But every donation is material, and that maximizes the good I can do with it.”

Nadya nods eagerly. “There’s like six different scholarships in STEM research alone, I think a dozen in the business sector, and when we get to our goal tonight —” she knows they will, Raines Corp. history states they always do and Raines Corp. never had her to push them above and beyond, “— the company’ll have enough to match the city’s bid for the abandoned tunnel reconstruction project.”

If he ever read the minutes she sent him after every Council meeting he’d know this, but when Jax said he didn’t do paperwork he meant he really didn’t do paperwork.

But it’s enough to get his attention. “And what happens then?”

Adrian shrugs. “I postpone it. The most I can do without getting politicians involved is five years but I figure… that should be long enough to either relocate the former Clanless and break even, or fortify the Shadow Den enough that any efforts won’t cause structural damage. Unfortunately Vega’s interim replacement hasn’t officially made her views on such things known, but I think with time —”

It’s—as Lily would put it—freakin’ cinematic. How Adrian’s voice fades away to a buzzing in her ears and Jax’s reply sounds like a mouthful of cotton. The music dims and the lights aren’t as bright except where they fall on her when she strides through the open double doors.

Now let it be known that Nadya firmly believes Kamilah looks amazing in anything. Her power suits, a crimson dress from centuries gone, the plum kimono she uses as a nightgown… Honestly she’d probably somehow make a banana costume look sinfully sexy.

No. What? No. Moving on.

And even though Nadya knew the moment she laid eyes on the uniform it was the non-negotiable choice — her brain put some weird filter on itself to keep her from imagining just what that looked like. Probably to try and keep her sane.

Because the real thing… there are literally no words.

Adrian’s laugh comes both from behind her and a million miles away. “Would you look at that. Now that is a sight that brings back memories.”

“Wow, color me surprised.” Jax deadpans.

Adrian is a close personal friend of the New York Historical Reenactment Society (surprisingly not a bunch of vampires… if there was ever a group suspect but no, she’s checked) and most of them are in attendance tonight. They make Nadya look like her dress—a gift from Adrian, rental only—was bought at a cheap pop-up Halloween store.

And Kamilah makes them look like a middle school theatre cast. There’s just something about the fabric, the way it fits her and the way she carries not just the uniform but her own body inside of it that makes her look authentic. No one would believe her; not with the freshly-oiled leather and polished brass buttons, but Nadya’s chaotic-dumb brain really wants to scream “take a look at the real deal, ya posers!”

Kamilah’s hand rests on the glossy hilt of her saber as she approaches. Eyes passing right over Adrian — probably used to the sight — and sparing Jax absolute no dignity in the soft “ha” she gives.

“I didn’t know we could wear uniforms.”

Kamilah raises an eyebrow and tucks a stray strand of hair back behind her ear. “You… have one?”

“No,” sigh number seven, “but I would’ve tried to find one. Anything to get out of these tights.”

“They were useful during winter.”

Adrian laughs and gestures to her eagerly. “That’s what I said!”

Kamilah wasn’t ignoring her, not on purpose. That’s made obvious the second she finally does take in every skirt and frill, every pearl in her necklace and lets her eyes linger where Nadya’s chest heaves against her corset.

“Nadya, you look as beautiful as ever.” Then Kamilah takes her hand and kisses the back of it with a soldier’s courteous bow. Where’d I leave that dumb lace fan…?

She’s about 99.9% sure Kamilah holding her hand is the only thing keeping her standing right now.

Adrian snickers. Nadya couldn’t care less. “Careful there, General Sayeed††. Your lady seems about to swoon.”

Thankfully the woman takes heed and pulls Nadya close, possibly the most public affection they’ve ever had holy crap on a cracker, resting a hand on the curve of her hip. Yet she looks at Adrian with… what is that, mild annoyance?

“You know very well I was not named General until nearly a century later.”

Jax mouths his silent counting — blanches; “You were a General in the Civil War? You know what — of course you were.”

“A discussion for another day, perhaps.” Kamilah dismisses him just shy of pushing him out the door; lucky for Nadya both he and Adrian take the hint and fade into the cinematic background.

It’s just Nadya and Kamilah now.

“Hello.”

“H-Hi.”

Long fingers brush a strand of Nadya’s hair aside feather-light. “You do look… stunning, Nadya. You look stunning. Blue becomes you yet again.”

Blue? She’s wearing blue? Because her face is scarlet. “You — I mean — wow like…” words Nadya — words, “you really wore that and…” And fought in it?

Kamilah’s nod is curt. “In a sense. My skills were best suited to espionage, sabotage and the like.”

“Of course they were.”

“Though I’m gladdened to know the uniform still becomes me.”

As if it ever wouldn’t. “You look perfect in, like, everything.” But Kamilah’s not a fan of those kinds of blanket statements, so she tries again a little bit more from the heart. “You make a uniform look really good, that’s what I mean.”

The hand on her hip presses down then; important and as on purpose as everything else Kamilah does. Through the fabric right underneath her hand a familiar purpling not-at-all-bruise sings sweet on Nadya’s skin. Of course Kamilah knows where the love bite is. She was the one who gifted it.

“I may be the soldier…” Kamilah pulls her close; a hold of stone — she leans down to ghost a kiss at Nadya’s jaw (and knows it will drive her wilder than wild) and whisper in her ear.

“But you’ll be the one taking orders.”

Nadya’s last coherent thought?

She really needs to find more chances to get Kamilah in costume.

NOTE: While this fic technically exists in the Oblivion Bound universe it works standalone as well, I think. The only references are brief and to Maricruz Espinoza, a vampire original character and girlfriend of Lily, and a sort-of reference to the fact that Marcel survived in my fanfiction. Hopefully it still reads well!

#bloodbound #kamilah x mc #kamilah sayeed #adrian raines #playchoices fanfiction #; my fics #mc: nadya al jamil #jax matsuo

[jokertrap-ran]

Dance with Devils -Charming Book- Vol.1 Kaginuki (Arlond) Rem アクマに囁かれ魅了されるCD 「Dance with Devils -Charming Book-」 Vol.1 レム

*Commissioned by @awomansplaceisshapinghistory, Thank you! *Spoiler free: Translations under cut

Commissions are still open!

Track 1:

Are you progressing well with your homework? Heh, my apologies. It seems like I’ve startled you. I’ve actually just arrived. I heard from Urie that you were studying really hard in the library. Still, that must be a really hard problem you’re working on for you to not notice me enter the library. 

I see. How about you let me take a little look at it. Hmm...This one’s right. And this one’s correct too. It’s pretty well done. It should be easier to solve if you tweak the formulas and the method a little. Although, I must say that it might take a while to do so. How about trying it out? Very well. Then let’s first start off by revising the formula. In this case, we have Sin X+ Cosine X and we should use this formula first. Your face’s looking a little red. Are you alright there? Ah...So you’re embarrassed? Seems like you’re still unable to get used to me being this close even after all this time. There’s no need for you to apologize. It’s not like I’m lecturing you about it or anything. Besides, you’re very lovely when embarrassed. How about you let me see that face of yours even more clearly? You don’t have to try to escape. There’s no one else here other than us two. There’s nothing to be ashamed about at all. 

Heh. Even the nape of your neck has turned red. You’re as sweet-smelling as ever. It tempts me to leave my mark right here. One that claims you as mine. Did I go a little too far for your comfort? Don’t be so mad. I wasn’t just teasing you about it. I was just acting part-ways to my desire as I really do find you lovable. It’s just that...I simply withdrew because the sound of my own heartbeat was starting to sound a little deafening to my own ears. That aside, I apologize for getting in the way of your homework. Now then, you should just continue on with it. Don’t mind me. I’ll teach you the formula I was talking about earlier another time. Hm? Did I break your concentration? At times like this, you should sing. When you do, the stars sparkle bright, the days get brighter and warmth seeps into every crevice it can possibly find! I do sing often whenever I feel down or on rather gloomy days of my own. 

...I guess this method doesn’t seem to be suited for you after all. Then...How about reading a book? Shiki did say that we got a couple of shipments here recently and that there were a few rather interesting picks. If I remember correctly, he said that they were all slotted in at the bookshelves in the far back. I’ll guide you there. Here, your hand if you may. 

That’s strange. They’re all books with nothing interesting to note at all. Exactly what does Shiki find interesting in these tomes? Hm? What’s the matter? You can’t open that book? Let me see. Well, there doesn’t seem to be a keyhole or anything from what I can see. But I certainly can’t open it either. Was this what Shiki meant when he said that there was a rather interesting book here? 

Ngh! This presence! This is the feeling of magic...It can’t be! Is this a magic book!? It flipped open of its own accord! This magic book has a consciousness of its own!? I was tricked! This is bad!

Track 2:

...Ngh...Where am I…? Are you alright!? I see that you’ve awoken. Are you hurt? Do you feel unwell anywhere at all? Haa, thank god for that. If anything were to happen to you, I…

Since when did you change out into that dress? My attire has changed as well...Is this attire change also due to that magic book’s power? Still, I must say that these are pretty well made. It’s pretty much what one gets from a large amount of monetary investment to get it made. You look utterly stunning in a dress. This light sky blue colour really does bring out the colour of your skin. Right, I’d gladly take my time to admire your current state of...dress, but we’ll have to leave that for later. We’re currently in a strange situation that I’m unable to wrap my head around. We have to first gather some information and get a grasp on the situation we’re in.

As far as I can see, this room probably belongs to someone with a high social status. That, I can tell from the amount of branded, high quality things decorating this place. They’re all old...Antiques, maybe, but they’re all very well-maintained and well cared for. But that’s still not nearly enough information. Let’s get out of this room and see what else we can find outside. You should wait inside here just as a precaution. I’ll head on out alone first-

Wha-!? What’s this noise? Where is it coming from? Words are forming on the walls. “The Naked King”? Is this a title of sorts?

“Long, long ago, in a land far away, there lived a king who absolutely adored clothes. One day, the king bought a set of rare clothes that would seem to be transparent when fools laid their eyes upon it. 

And this, the king decided to wear that set of precious, priceless clothes to the procession. He had decided to show and flaunt his new attire.”

Hm? The words on the wall have disappeared...That was certainly the work of magic. Could it be that...I see. I have just managed to finally get a grasp of the situation we’re currently in. We’re probably in a realm within the magic book itself. There’s no other reason for us being here otherwise.

Yes, that’s right. The magic book I picked up back in the library reacted to my own and activated because of that. In other words, this magic book is acting on its own accord. Which can be considered to be a pretty bad situation.

Ah. Speaking of “The Naked King”...Is that the title of that door there? If that’s so...Then that means that there are more doors like this within the magic book. Which means...We’re both currently within that very same story. Hm...Perhaps that’s why our attires were swapped out as well. That dress that seemed to be perfectly fitted and tailored for you...Just like one perfectly suited for a royalty of court. And...the king who supposedly stands tall beside you. That’s supposed to me, isn’t it? I’m still unsure of what the magic book’s motives are but I’m sure that we’ll be released from this realm so long as we manage to see this tale through.

We should be fine if we go along with the flow of things and wait for it all to conclude. 

No, it’s just...Well, I’m not too familiar with human tales. Is “The Naked King” a popular story? I was made to dress like a king and am expected to play an active role in this tale?

Ngh!? You mean, I have to walk in front of my subjects stark naked in the end!? Me? Naked? There’s no way I can do that! No...But, that’s also one of the conditions I have to fulfil in order to get us out of this realm created by that book! But still, to parade around in my birthday suit in front of the masses...No, wait! But that means that I’ll be completely exposed- I can’t let her see me in that state, what if she gets mentally scarred by it!? But wait, that’s still rather fortunate-

...I’ve set my heart out. If it’s to protect you, I’ll become naked if that’s what it takes!!

Ah! I see...There’s also a possibility where we could search for other methods to get through this predicament just like you say. Heh. As expected of my lover indeed. Calm and collected even in times like this and coming to the most logical conclusions. Well then, let’s keep the option of me prancing around stark naked as our last resort. And till then...Let’s search for other ways to get through this by hook or by crook.

Track 3:

Our acting of being the Queen and King aside, I really never thought that things would end up this way. Indeed, I did enjoy myself as well. Although, I’d say that the reason for that is probably different from yours. The king and the king...I’m glad that we’re acting and being treated like a married couple. Heh, seems like you didn’t notice that at all. In this world we’re currently in, we aren’t just lovers but we’re instead, husband and wife. It’s an important fact for our acting to work out as well. That’s why...You can come closer to me. This should be obvious, given that we’re married now. You don’t have to look away to hide your face. The sunset here is so bright that I wouldn’t know if your cheeks or ears were red. 

I feel like relishing in the moment right now and forgetting all about our current predicament. I feel like staying here forever, with you, as beautiful as you are. Along with this magnificent, dazzling garden. Gazing at the sunset forever and ever…

What’s the matter? Of course, I don’t mind if you wish to take a break. Did that tire you out? Me? There’s no way I’d be tired with such simple things. Even if I were a king in this story we’re currently playing out, I’d say that my job as the student council president is much more hectic and busy. Now then, I’d love to stay and chat with you, but we’ve really got to get back and sort out all this new information we’ve acquired from the past few days. 

From what we’ve gathered from our inspections of the area, the areas not depicted in the story itself along with the rest of the world aside from the court and the castle do not exist. As I’m sure that you’ve witnessed yourself. In other words, even if there was a way out, it would most certainly be within the castle itself or the court areas here. And also...Regarding the words that we saw on the wall, new words form whenever the sun rises. I’m sure that’s proof that the story as proceeding onwards. As further proof of that, the ceremony preparations are also proceeding smoothly. And...There’s also the fact that every other person or being residing here besides us are all creations of that magic book. They all have forms and look human enough but they’re only capable of one-liners and the same repetitive words. Of course, it’s expected since they’re people who only exist within the book, but...We still do not know if they’ll eventually evolve to hold their own wills and thoughts. And...While I’ve managed to grasp a couple of things about this world we’re currently in, I’m still facing a dead-end in regards to its connection to our world.

Haa...Please don’t look so uneasy. We certainly don’t have a single clue right now, but I’ll definitely find a way for us to return back to our old world. I swear to save you and get you out of here even if this body of mine crumbles and fails. Why? Don’t you want to return to our old world? Heh. I see, so that’s it. You’re right. It won’t do at all if we don’t make it out together. What have I...I can’t believe that I even uttered those words. It seems like I’ve had a short lapse of memory. The sun will be setting soon. We should get back to the castle before it gets cold out. Here, come.

Heh. That’s a rather long sigh. I suppose you’re tired as well. We did walk out about the area quite a bit so you should really get a good night’s rest. Still...There are still a lot of things that we have yet to discover in this castle. We should go for a round around the castle’s rooms tomorrow morning. We might find out a little more. Come on then, we should turn in for the day since we have an early start tomorrow. I never expected us to be teleported into a world within the magic book but I’m glad for the fact that we’re together, at least. 

Don’t just sit there, hurry and come under here. Heh. Won’t you stop distancing yourself from me? I won’t do anything. Come on, come here. Your adorable when flustered but you should really get used to sleeping together with me. Because we’ll eventually end up sleeping together like this anyway. 

Hugging you close like this...letting myself relax with you in this manner fills we with a power that even I can’t explain. Plus, that brother of yours will never find his way here. I do feel bad for your only other family but it feels good to be monopolizing you all to myself. You’re mine for now. Only mine. Heh, have I surprised you? I apologize. How about I seek permission from you from now on? First...I wish to kiss this shell of your ear which has turned a lovely shade of red, may I? When will you deliver your reply? If you keep mum for this long, even I find it hard to hold myself back. Yes, alright. Next...Your neck with it’s absolutely delectable scent. Indulge me? Well, I’m troubled even if you tell me to do whatever I wish. I can hear my heartbeat so very loudly in my ears. I apologize for disturbing your sleep. I didn’t intend to do so but, it’s just that your very presence within the confines of my arms right now is such an honor. That’s right. This isn’t anything special at all considering our circumstances here. But even if it’s a given for such a thing to happen, that doesn;t change the fact that it brings me happiness. Still, I’d feel bad for keeping you from your sleep. I’d continue holding onto you so you can just fall asleep like that. That’s right, how about I stroke your head? Doing this calms me as well. 

Heh. It seems like you’re clearly enjoying it. Just looking at you makes me feel sleepy as well. Come on then, close your eyes. Yes, good night.

Already asleep, huh. You must have been more worn out than you initially thought. What an adorable look you have on while sleeping. I wonder what you’re dreaming of right now? I do hope that it’s a good dream…

I have to hurry and find a way for us to get out of here before it’s too late. I’ll definitely save you. Even if my power fails me, I swear to get you out. Good night and sweet dreams.

Track 4:

This is the only place in the castle that we’ve yet to get a proper look at. There’s only 3 days left till the ceremony. It would be great if we had a couple of clues under our wing right about now- Mngh!? It’s great that you’re willing to hold my hand of your own accord right now but it’s a little troubling to have you yanking me along this hard! 

No, I don’t mind. I know how you must feel right now. Besides worrying about whether we’re able to return to our world, you’re also worried about your mother and your brother, aren’t you? It’ll cause quite a big fuss back in our world if you’ve been missing for a couple of days as well. But don’t worry! There’s no way of telling that time flows the same inside of the book as it is in the outside world. There’s also a high chance that naught but a few minutes have passed in the real world. I suppose no one has noticed you missing yet. Although, I dare say that I can’t say the same for how much you miss your mother and brother and your yearning to find a way out as soon as possible.

It’s great to see that you’re a little less uneasy about things right now. I wish for you to rely on me if something were to crop up. I want to ease the uneasiness and worry you might be feeling to the best of my abilities if possibly. It’s also to protect that smile of yours. Yes, that’s right. I wish to be able to rely on you as well, if anything were to crop up and it calls for that.

Hm? What is it? This magic book’s motive? Well, that’s...No, I can’t say anything for sure. I apologize for being unable to answer your query. Rather than that, we should resume our search. We have to find clues about ways to return back to our original world as well.

This room’s really different from the others, considering how dusty it is inside. Plus it’s also pitch-black inside and I can’t really see much of anything. Perhaps it’s because of the absence of a light source other than the light coming from the very entrance itself. There probably wasn’t much life here or anyone living here for that matter. Still, even if that were the case...There seems to be quite the amount of personal possessions in here. I wonder if it was a warehouse or a storage room of sorts?

There’s a candle and a wick over here. Which means that...As I thought, there are matches here. If we have these...Alright. This works. Oh, that’s...Of course, I would have lit it up in just a moment with my magic but I simply used the match because it was simply lying there, just within reach. Putting that aside, we’re now able to get a clear view of the room now that we’ve lit up the candle. Indeed, it’s a mix of various items and trinkets. Other personal items left here would be...clothes? Was this someone’s living quarters? It as written in this story that the king did love clothes, but...there are quite a number of femenine clothing here. Hm? DId you manage to find something? 

This is...No matter how you look at it, this surely can’t be an article of clothing from this world. It’s similar to the type of clothes you’d usually wear. But this one in particular seems closer to what we demons use. And from the age of this cloth, I’d say that it’s pretty old. Looking at the other outfits here, however, tells me that the people who were wearing them were all from different timelines. Hmm…I don’t know. I can’t make much out of this despite how we’re the only two who are supposed to be in this world right now. I see! Oh, no, it’s nothing. We should inspect everything in this room for now. There might perhaps be clues leading to our way back. There seems to be a collection of books over here. They seem much more valued than the clothes over there.

What’s the matter? Why are you silent? Are you shaking? This room certainly has an ill-feeling vibe around it. Everything is left out in a place like this, without any form of order. It’s very weird. Plus, it’s starting to get colder inside here. Maybe it’s because the sun’s setting? I’m sure you’re shaking because of the cold. I think this would calm you down a little but...We can stay like that for a while. I won’t leave your side if it calms you down. Your hand has gotten pretty chilly to the touch as well. You might lose all sense of touch to the numbness that’ll start to set in. It should start to warm up if I join your hand with mine. Heh. You don’t have to worry about me. It’s harder on me if I left you feeling all cold like that without doing anything. Has the feeling returned to your hands yet? I see, that’s good to hear. It still feels a little cold to the touch though. I’ll light up the fireplace once we return to our room. You can rest there for a while and I’ll stay there with you in front of the fireplace. I’m glad to see that you’re starting to feel a little less tense about all these. I won’t let anything happen or hurt you while I’m around. Even if anything were to happen, I...Ah, I apologize, It seems like I was gripping you a little too hard.

Hm? Something fell. This is...A magical amulet? Yeah. A magical amulet hold a stone that magic can be stored within. There isn’t any trace of magic left in this thing since it’s been down here for so long. RIght. If I were to place my magic into this...Ngh! 

It should light up. This is proof that there’s magic within the stone. You can try touching it. I’m pretty sure you must be surprised at how it’s warm to the touch. Within the confines of this stone dwells a flame. A fire made from my magic is burning within its depths. If you hold onto this, I’m sure you’ll be able to watch your footing even if you’re surrounded by pitch-black darkness. Here, let me clasp it around your neck. Come closer. The fact that my magic’s together with you means that I’m with you. This magical amulet will definitely protect you if anything were to happen.

Ngh! My apologies, I seem to be rather tired today. Don’t look so worried, this isn’t an issue at all. Still, won;t you let me stay within your arms for a while more. It feels really comfortable here. Thank you, but...It’s pathetic of me to be showing you such a weak side. I can rely on you anytime? I wish for the same as well. If that’s the case...Will you hear me out on this one selfish request of mine? If you could hold onto me tighter? I want to ingrain your warmth and the feeling of you into my memory. Yes, thank you.

Track 5:

It’s finally the day of the ceremony. And it turns out that we never did find any leads on both ends. Hm? You’re asking me if I’m alright? In what sense do you mean? Heh. I’m as normal as I can be as far as you can see. Any exhaustion you see on my being is because of the through inspection we did of every nook and cranny in this place. There’s no need for you to worry. What’s with that all of a sudden? Of course I’ll be appearing out there in front of the masses today. There’s no other way back to the real world for us if I do not. 

We never did find another method to get out of this realm. There’s no other choice. Still, it would be great if the story did end just like the tale of “The Naked King” and all I had to do was to follow it through just as how it was written out to be. No, it’s nothing at all.

Oh? This sound...It seems like the story has a continuation. “The day of the ceremony had finally arrived. The invisible clothing that was made and fitted from the king was brought into his very chambers, clothing that would look invisible to fools.” 

I see. So the clothes are supposed to be within this box? The story won’t continue if I don’t open it. Let’s see. W-What’s the meaning of this? This is the school’s uniform! Why would they be returning me my clothes now of all times? What is their objective? Are they aiming for something? Wait! You shouldn’t carelessly touch it! Ngh!

T-This-!! I see...They’re vicious! To think that they’ll forcibly suck out all the magic from my being just right before the story’s end! It seems like the ending I did predict was actually true. I kept quiet about it because I didn’t want to cause you worry but it seems like the end objective of this magic book is to suck out all the life source and the magic of the humans and demons alike it has trapped within itself. Do you remember the copious amounts of clothes we found back in that room? They were all remnants of this book’s past victims. And with that large amount of physical remnants left behind...I dare say that this book’s been living for just as long, preying on beings. And the same goes for me as well, my magic has been gradually sucked out from my being the longer I stay. Ngh! There were complications but this accursed book’s aim had always been me, a demon. Still, I never would have thought that it wanted that much of my powers and that was the price I had to pay. If this goes on, it’ll steal all of my power from me before we can even get to the ending of this story. It came here to take the rest of my powers away, disguised as that pile of clothing! The king that loved clothes...This magic book uses clothes as it’s way of preying on the people and it does seem rather effective. Bait...That’s why it’s giving us our uniforms now of all times. Sorry for keeping mum about it. But you looked uneasy just by being ensnared and trapped by this book. I couldn’t let you down and cause you more unease  than I already did.

Ugh! It finally showed it’s true form! I’m sure that every other being in this castle’s the same as well, meant to impede and stop us in our path. It intends to end me with its own proverbial hands. The door’s locked for now, but it’ll eventually break from that amount of pressure being placed upon it. We were too late!? If it’s come down to this, then--Flames!

I don’t know how long I can hold them back with my remaining magic. I;ve managed to knock it down for now but it won’t always stay down. It’ll rear back for another attack again after a while.

We don’t have the time to spare till it gets back up so let’s hurry and move to a bigger room!

That scuffle we had earlier has drained more of my magic than I thought it would. It wouldn’t be strange if I’m unable to hold my ground any longer. No, it’s useless. There’s no exit out of this world we’re trapped in. We’re just cornered rats right now with nowhere to run.

It’ll be alright. I won’t let them hurt you no matter what. I’ll definitely- That’s right. I won’t let you hurt a single hair on her head. No matter what I have to do, no matter what ends I have to go to.

Heh. Hear me out. There’s one other way out. Yes, I mean it. So just leave everything to me and stay put.

Magic book! I’m sure you can hear me! It seems like you were unable to suck out all of my magic even with your last attempt at it. A pity, really, but I still have magic left within me! I’m sure you must want it. This magic that runs through my veins. The magic of the Arlond family that’s so rare and highly priced! Listen well! I’ll give you this magic of mine and even this body if you wish! But in exchange, you’ll have to return her back to our original world!

I understand and appreciate your sentiments. But there is and will be no meaning to this life of mine if you’re not back there in one piece. Please, don’t stop me. I apologize. There’s no other option here. No matter what the repercussions may be, I only wish to save you. Yes...I thought that we’d be returning back to our world together. But I’m sure even you know that there’s no other way to this right now. The thought of us being separated had never once crossed my mind. But I wish to save you just as much as that very same sentiment. I beg of you to please understand me. I simply wish to save the person that I love.

Do you understand? If so, then...W-Why? All of the sudden...There’s no meaning to you being alive if I’m not there? Am I...I’m...Such an important existence in your life as well? ...No...I see. It wasn’t as if I forgot but for us...We can’t put the other at stake. We promised to get out of here together, alive. That’s right. Heh...Yeah. Even if I managed to get you out in one piece, I’m sure that you’ll come back looking for me just to get me out. I can’t let you do something like that. Very well, I’ll have to prepare myself if that’s the case. That’s right, we’re getting out of here! No matter what we have to do!

Sorry but I’ve decided against giving you the rest of my magic! If you want it, you’ll just have to come and get it!!

Humph. Of course you’d take up the challenge. This is also partially your fault for keeping us trapped in here. There’s no need to fear you, there’s no way I’d do so no matter how long you keep us trapped in here! Slow! Fla--

Ngh--!

It seems like I’m unable to even summon my sword out anymore...How can I defeat it without my sword? It’ll be alright. I’ll bring it down one way or another! I’m sure that’ll be possibly if I hardness all of my remaining magic! Yes! That’s it! The magical amulet, the flames I granted you! There’s no doubt that what’s inside it is the physical form of my magic! If I utilize the magic within...Listen well, I want you to break that amulet upon my signal. Can you do it? Yeah, I’ll be relying on you. 

Now, come at me whenever you please! We’re prepared for you! Now!! All of the flames are within my grasp! You’ll burn into nothingness with this! Rest assured, this flame is one of mine. It’s my magic so you’ll be fine so long as you stay within my arms. We should be able to get back to our world once it turns into ash. Could I hold you tighter? I want to be certain of the feeling of you in my arms. I can’t believe that I tried to give up something of such importance, currently residing in my arms. This foolishness of mine will only ever happen this one time and will never be spoken of henceforth again. However, I won’t ever let you go again. Yes, I mean it. No matter what happens, I vowed to stay by your side till the very end.

Track 6:

Haa...We’ve finally managed to come back. Can you get up? Here, take my hand. It seems like time hasn’t passed here while we were stuck in that book, just like I predicted. It’s not even sunset yet. The magic book’s turning to ash...Of course, that’s how it reaches its end.

At least there’ll be no more victims who’d fall prey to this book any longer. Besides, my powers are back to normal as well. Still...To think that Shiki would even bring in such a dangerous book. He might have inserted it to the pile, thinking that it was an interesting book, but...I’ll still have to give him a sharp telling off for his actions this time room. But for now, rather than rattling his ear off...There’s something I have to do. And that is...Hugging you as such. Even I was surprised to hear you say that you wouldn’t return to this realm alone. Perhaps it was your bleeding wounds...I thought that I wouldn’t be able to save you. 

But still, we’ve managed to return to this realm in a full piece together. It’s only because you were so stubborn back there, pouring your entire being into telling me how you really feel. Heh, there’s no need to be modest at all. If it weren’t for your words, I’m sure that I wouldn’t even be standing here with you right now. I’m really...fortunate to have such a brave and affectionate lover like you. Hm? Me? ...But I don’t remember myself ever being reckless?

Eh? Right...I did keep the fact that my magic was all but sucked into oblivion to myself but that was only so that I wouldn’t make you feel uneasy. And...I was willing to sacrifice myself to that accursed tome so long as it meant that you would make it out safely…

I apologize. I didn’t mean to upset you. I swear that I’ll never try to face things alone by myself anymore. I promise to stay by your side and serve as your protector. 

No- I just thought that a kiss was needed to seal a vow during times like this? Still...I never thought that such a simple action of mine would elicit such an adorable response from you. I’m so relieved right now that my own heartbeat is pounding in my ears.

It was just a simple, small kiss. And yet here you are, turning all red again. Please don’t run away. I want to feel you. Staying in such close proximity like this makes me feel at peace. Yeah...Didn’t I say so earlier as well? That even if something’s a given, it still doesn’t change the fact that it brings me happiness I won’t ever let you out of the cage of my arms. I love you and I’ll stay by your side, from now on and forever.

#Dance With Devils #Dance With Devils Charming Book #Kaginuki Rem #Arlond Rem #Saito Souma #Rejet #Otome #Drama CD #Translations #commissions #comission #Translation comission

[cruciatusxxcervus]

Who the Heck is Eden?

Warning: The backstory contains parental death, child death, and gore.)

Disclaimer: For those who have seen my DBZ verse for my other RP blog, ambereyedcetra, you’ll notice they are the same. I started off with an AU for Eden’s original blog but it has developed to the point that I would be more comfortable giving this AU a blog of its own. I am the mun and creator of both blogs, no worries about character theft!

While the blog is currently focused on the DBZ verse, I am open to interacting with muses of other verses, especially fandom-less muses!

In verses that are not DBZ-related, Eden's backstory is very much the same. The only differences being that Shihab is a celestial realm instead of a planet, and it is an unnamed force that destroyed her world instead of Freeza.

This page is under construction, the story needs revamping. Forgive me for such a long wait for the change. I hope to get the backstory and information rewritten soon.

Name: Eden of the Draconids

Many of the characters in the Dragon Ball franchise have unusual names, often associated with food. However, since Eden was originally a Final Fantasy muse and her roots are based off Biblical stories, her name won’t be as humorous. Her father gave her the name Eden, in hopes she would be as beautiful and bountiful in blessings, but he had no intentions in her falling into sin like those within the Garden. Eden is to represent the Garden of Eden in that sense. As the story progresses, Eden gradually becomes corrupted with her inability to move past her loss and the frustration in her struggle with her heritage and identity, she betrays the planet, the stars, and what she holds dear, thus resulting in her losing that spiritual light.

Not only she represents the fall of Eden, but her story is to illustrate Judas Iscariot, the disciple who committed betrayal out of greed. Ultimately, her story is to reveal that even the most faithful can fall. However, her story is to also show the radical power of forgiveness, how it can revive the dead spirit.

Her last part of her name relates to her clan name. Clan names come from that of the meteor showers: Draconids, Perseids, Leonids, and Ursids. A kirinite’s membership of their clan can be determined by the color of their scales (described below). Their native planet, Shihab, bears an Arabic name, as a large part of Eden’s inspiration comes from the Middle East and Northern Africa and its meaning, “Shooting Star” refers to the Kirinites’ celestial nature.

Age: Mid to late 20’s during the Dragon Ball Z timeline, late 40’s during the Dragon Ball gt timeline.

Species: Kirinite (DBZ), Kirin (Other verses) 

The kirinite name is based off a mythical creature with a similar appearance: the kirin. Many of their physical characteristics (description on this page) resemble the creature.

Kirinites are known for their agility, intelligence, and spiritual power. Much of their strength comes from their lower body, and are capable of cracking bone (of those who lack intensive training) with their rock-hard hooves.

Their senses are incredibly sharp, heightened by their connection to their planet. This is strongly linked to their ability to hear the voices of souls passed and can help them detect the aura of living creatures (unless those targeted are trained to hide their energy level). Though they lack the ability to fire ki directly from their bodies, they can harvest crystals from the earth and use their energy and rituals to inflict damage and potentially status-related problems (such as sleep, pacifying, or for those who master the skill, copying an enemy’s skill and create illusions).

Kirinites can also call upon an ability of the Celestial Beast. This creature is believed to be the totem of all born of Kirinite blood. This ability is similar to that of Yamcha’s Wolf Fang Fist, except the aura takes form of a large, maned antelope-like creature as the fighter charges. This empowers their melee strikes, as well as have a chance of burning the opponent with their energy. This power, however, is very risky as it drains much of the user’s energy reserves and can leave them vulnerable if they are not able to dispose of the foe before time runs out. Another limitation is the need to use crystals taken from Shihab’s meteorites to channel their energy and awaken their totem.

Kirinites feel connected to their planet and believe they can commune with the spirits. They place great reverence to the stars, viewing them as creators of their world and embodiments of all souls that were born upon it. With the use of crystals, Kirinites connect with the ghosts that whisper guidance to them and unlock their powers. The ancient belief was cast into doubt, however, as the Kirinites saw invading ships scream past the stars and collide into their home.

Description:

Kirinites have a humanoid appearance, with several physical traits resembling that of a sable antelope and gemsbok. All members possess cloven hooves for feet, often with feathering on the back of them, with the short bristly fur covering the tops of these hooves and melding into the skin at mid-calf.

Though members of the Draconid Clan bear long, ridged horns that gracefully sweep back from the head, Eden’s horns resemble antlers, a trait inherited from her mother’s clan: the Persids. All Kirinites possess large deer-like ears; claws; heavy, thick, fang-like teeth with large prominent canines (elder, higher-ranked Kirinites will have even larger canines that slide over the lip); long lion-like tails; mohawk-like hairstyles (mohawks are usually more prominent on males); and small, light-colored speckles scattered over their skin and scales.

Kirinites also have scales present on the fronts of their hooves and lower leg, hips, base of their tail, the tops of their hands and up their forearms, and up their back. The scales on their backs are thickened and raised like a crocodile’s spines; these are believed to help protect their spines during hunts and battles. These scales are often dark in color, yet have small glistening speckles, similar to stars.

With Eden’s Draconid Clan, the scales are similar to those of the sunset (coming from the preferred time to view the Draconid meteor shower). Her scales are a gradient of a dark, muted reddish-purple fading into rosy gold at the bottom of the scales, with the silvery speckles being most prominent in the darkest colors. Her scales are in the common places, listed above.

Eden stands at about 5’ 3’’ and has a lean, toned figure. Her skin is a very dark tan, and has a subtle rosy tint to it. Silvery cream speckles are visible all over her skin, with them being most prominent on her shoulders, upper arms, shoulder blades, thighs, and down her sides and hips along the dorsal scales, and down her tail.

She also has various scars from her hunts and battles. While shallow cuts litter her entire body, there are three distinct scars: Three claw marks are seen on her left collarbone; four huge, jagged scars rip over her left rib cage, reach down her side, and end just above her left hip bone; and a messy web of gashes, bite marks, and dimples where flesh and scale had been torn off is seen on her right forearm.

I based her appearance loosely on the Egyptian and Middle Eastern backgrounds. She bears the purplish-black tattoos around her eyes and on her cheeks that are iconic of Egyptian relics, and wore three piercings on both ears (a golden ring, silver stud, and silver ring), the ivory fang gauge once seen only on her left ear. Two thin, silver lip rings were on her bottom lip. Her piercings are forcibly removed during her drafting into Frieza’s army, leaving two rips on her bottom lip and her ears tattered.

There is also a tattoo on her left wrist, a small symbol of the silver sun with two black-tipped feathers. It’s to honor her late mother.

Her long, straight, thick hair reaches down to her hip. It’s a very dark brown, with some streaks in her bangs and on the ends of her hair fading to a dusky purple-brown color.  Four thin braids also adorn her mane, each braid held together by a tarnished gold band.

The fur covering her ankles, ears, and tail are a dark rosy-brown; purpleish-black markings rim the edges of her ears and around the hooves. Like all Kirinites, Eden also has horizonal, rectangular pupils; her irises are still a deep amber.

During the DB gt timeline, Eden’s seemingly endless wandering and fighting against her heritage and spiritual connection has impacted her. Her ribs become visible due to restricted access to food, and dark circles and bags can be seen beneath her eyes from lack of sleep. Though Kirinites has long lifespans and youthfulness, she appears older and more tired due to her difficult lifestyle. More scars are also visible on her body.

During Eden’s time in the Planet Trade Organization and her intergalactic escapades, she wears black and champagne gold armor, baggy black pants, and a marroon belt as seen below.

On Earth, however, she can be seen wearing midriff shirts to show off her midsection (Kirinites view scars as a sign of beauty, as they prove one is capable to guarding their clan and their mate and children). The tops are usually dark colors. Her favorites being a dark gray midriff shirt with a knotted hem and a wide collar to show off her shoulder (and thus the scar on her collar bone), and a charcoal heather top with a smilodon skull graphic. She also wears acid washed jeans, or ripped denim capris. She also develops a fondness for hemp chokers and tribal-inspired jewelry. Her usual attire for life on Earth can be seen below:

( Full size images and detailed reference sheet can be found [HERE] !! )

She is always wearing a crystal of pale gray and pale gold  around her neck. This crystal comes from Shihab and is what she uses to channel her ki for attacks and summon the Celestial Beast totem.

Abilities:

Eden is no exception and possess the standard kirinite abilities as described above, along with being able to let out a thundering bestial roar (sounds like an angry mix between a red deer stag’s and a lion’s) that can echo for miles. However, the blessing of hearing ghosts becomes a curse the day she forsakes her faith in them. If she were to return to Shihab, they would become distorted, distressing wails. Though she may be a great distance away from them, they still tug deep in her mind like a silent, persistent haunting.

When she lands on other planets, this ability becomes even more unnerving as she cannot understand the souls tangled whispers. This only strengthens her fear and hatred towards hearing them, and is further convinced that the stars of her home have cursed her. She is at risk of losing focus, becoming entranced, or reacting wildly midst the most severe hallucination phase. All these can make battle extremely dangerous for the lost Kirinite.

Though during times where her vigilance becomes exhausted, she does let the voices stream through her for a time. Her corrupted view and dark intentions for the use of her people’s powers will occasionally make the scramble of strange tongues make sense. Like a devil whispering temptation to heartbroken ears, the words take form of spells, of rituals beyond her former knowledge. To seek and perform these rituals were strictly forbidden in Kirinite law, but with these discoveries, the last Kirinite decides to abolish the law and commit these rare incantations to memory.

Over time she practices the dark arts, and more and more she seeks to uncover the greatest ritual that dark words promise will endow her with the power to rain flaming justice upon all who wronged her. She still searches for the ultimate crystal, said to be buried within a planet, beneath the graves of countless sacred souls, conflicted with the desire to finally seize that power and her need to discover the truth about the stars and her people. The most common of these is her ability to conjure sleeping crystals, meant to lull the threat or target to a deep sleep, allowing her to escape or steal from them. Due to her corruption, however, they are filled with negative energy and can inflict pain, or blinding fury, on anyone within its proximity (including herself), rather than just the opponent.

My aim for Eden is for her to learn and grow stronger gradually through training. She will likely lose in battles, especially against powerful opponents, though this is dependent on the verse, where our muses are in their interactions, and what my RP partner is comfortable with. The fun in Dragon Ball Z is watching a character work hard with others to overcome challenges, not winning everything effortlessly.

Personality:

Eden can be cunning, and she relies on this trait when facing a troubling situation; often choosing to stick to the shadows and tricks rather than facing someone head-on. Eden can’t stand the thought of losing control and is known to fight viciously and dirty when cornered. Preferring to be quiet and simply observe, she struggles with social interactions, especially first time meetings. She is paranoid towards others, thus she doesn’t trust easily. The woman is also victim to envy, as she can become very jealous towards those who are more skilled or more blessed than she is. She broods quietly instead of talking about her problems; and can seem dishonest, selfish, and stubborn.

However, towards those who grow close to her heart, she becomes protective and does her best to be dependable. The Kirinitw becomes more playful to those she loves, often sneaking up and catching them by surprise (mostly by pouncing on them). She’ll even goes as far as become touchy-feely with them. She is rather insecure, due to her fear of the ancestral stars and belief that she is cursed, and often looks towards intimacy as a means to help combat with her insecurities.

Parents:

Her father’s name is Cassiel, which is the name of the archangel of tears and solitude in the Kabbalah. He is considered withdrawn, quiet, and has a cynical view towards most things. He questions and fears of what the voices will do to him. Because of his fear, He tries not to get involved with the stars’ and Planet’s troubles, despite their urgings for him to act. He was a hunter for the Draconid clan.

Her mother’s name is Nizhoni, which I found means “Beautiful” in Navajo. She was a merchant for her natal Persid clan before her marriage to Cassiel. She’s always been headstrong and takes pride in being seen as “a rebel for the right reasons”. Nizhoni is very set in her ways, and is always determined to act for the greater good. This is where her and Cassiel get into arguments, particularly when tensions on Shihab begin to mount. The clans began fighting for the sacred lands, with the Draconids and Persids allying with one another, and Leonids and Ursids joining on the opposing end. Nizhoni spends much of her time travelling between clan territories to give supplies to her natal clan as they are on the front lines. Though this wears on her, especially when she is pregnant, she remains determined to do all she can to save both her natal clan’s and her current clan’s livelihoods.

The extent of her exhaustion became starkly apparent as she struggles to give birth to Eden. Cassiel’s dying faith in the spirits finally came to an end when Nizhoni passes away after delivery. He believes the spirits of the stars and planet truly betrayed him, and thus sows the seeds of hatred towards them. He is a distant and gruff father, spending his waking hours away hunting to meet his daughter’s needs, only to check in when necessary. He begins training her to become a hunter as soon as she was able to hold a dagger.

Though Eden admires her father’s resilience, she quickly learns not to ask about her mother and the spirits’ words as it often brings about buried anguish. As she grows, Cassiel’s inner resistance to the spirits’ influence begins to wear on his mind. The once powerful man she knew slowly deteriorated to a feeble lost soul, becoming disconnected with reality and unable to carry about his duties.

Now a young adult, Eden patrols the clan’s hunting grounds and boundaries to support Cassiel and herself. She starts questioning her own faith as she watches how the spirits are affecting her father. Distortion ripples through once familiar voices, she and the others start to grow restless. There is a persistent, eerie feeling in the air, like the calm before a violent storm.

It was that night, as metal and murderous intent fell from the skies instead of rock and fire, that the spirits, stars, and earth fell silent.

The invaders of different shapes and sizes claimed the planet in the name of Frieza and began slaughtering most of the inhabitants. The terrified Draconids came to the conclusion that the stars have betrayed them, and they could no longer trust the spirits’ words. The last survivors plotted their escape, with Eden and the ailing Cassiel being among them. They attempted an ambush to steal the invaders’ space pods, only to be caught and murdered.

Being only a lowly hunter and guard, Eden swallowed her pride and submitted. She spoke velvet words, despite her trembling voice, playing up her strength and skills honed by years of surviving within the badlands and fighting the monstrous beasts of the land.  It was by the sheer grace of whatever deity was left to care that they conceded to let her live, only on the condition that she devotes her life to servitude.

The worst was yet to come, as training within the Planet Trade Organization held no mercy for a mere foot soldier. Though bones were broken and tears spilled, the Kirinite held onto her lust for vengeance. She vowed to tear the entrails of these monsters and their tyrannical ruler, just as they have done to her people, to her family. She vowed to show the celestial guardians, who left her kind to die, that she would overcome their betrayal and inflict the same suffering upon them. So she waited, she watched, learning who were integral to this force, and their weaknesses…

(Thank you @crownprincefreeza for letting your muses become part of mine’s story!!)

Her already turbulent life in Frieza’s forces took a turn for the worse after a failed conquest over a targeted planet. The soldiers stood at attention fearful and frozen before the enraged prince, dreading for what was to come. Eden was no exception, drowning in the quiet, yet surging rise of death’s cold approach. Yet to endure abuse, from the very creature that brought destruction upon everything she had known and loved, to be beneath the heel of her enemy fueled a storm of fiery rage. In her foolishness she bit down at Freeza’s pointed finger, earning her a scream and a brutal swat of his tail.

Once sliding across the floor from his strike, Eden laid paralyzed, waiting for the painful judgment to come upon her. Malevolent ideas on what to do weaved and clashed in the imperial mutant’s mind, and to Eden’s surprise, he offers her an opportunity to receive redemption. Desperate to remain alive, Eden accepts, not knowing the price of her pardon would cost until moments later.

Amazingly, few of her people, members of her late mother’s clan, hid well enough to survive the onslaught. As images of once proud warriors digging through the garbage of the planet’s new occupants and the deadly clashes between them flash by, Frieza gave her the choice: Lure out the last of the Kirinites and pay her transgression with their blood or die. The torn woman wrestled within herself. Would she dare betray her allies, her own kin, just so she might live another day? Morals and instinct warred within her, and ultimately through her tears, her yearning to survive, just long enough to make Frieza and all the spirits suffer for their crimes, overcame the more noble of choices. She accepts, and with the towering equine soldier, Yuut, being commanded to follow her, Eden returns onto once familiar soil, the soil that no longer bore the warmth nor recognizable voices.

With her armor cast aside, sand scratching and clinging onto hands and skin, and letting Yuut break one of her precious antlers, Eden approached the last of the Persids. Eden spoke of escaping the invaders’ prison and stole a space craft that could save them all. Her pleas for them to join her were eventually believed, and they followed Eden away from the last of their strongholds, only for their blood to stain the hooves and shadows of both soldiers.

Once conquered, Eden stared at the eyes of dead kin. Wide with fear, with otherworldly agony of being betrayed, becoming like dead ice, devoid of any life. The spirits no longer held comfort to her, and with a sudden, brutal crash of her head against the rocks stained by unrelenting violence; her last antler fell, broken dark shards among limp bodies, before turning away with Yuut.

#About Eden #muse info

[fibula-rasa]

The Vamps Part 3: Pola Negri and Exoticism

CW: I will be referencing the Roma in this essay and the slur g*psy will pop up from historical sources.

In the first post of this series, I mentioned that modern critics draw a deeper connection between Vamps and bloodsucking vampires than existed in the teens. So, forgive me that this Vamps entry is going to focus on another trait often shared between Vamps and vampires: otherness. In the Bram Stoker tradition, the undead-other and the foreign-other coincide. Stoker didn’t invent the concept, but Dracula and its Eastern European evil infiltrating the west has informed most vampire stories since his novel was published.

Likewise, Vamps are often explicitly foreign or vaguely coded as such. Most often this foreignness is steeped in a stereotypical conception of the East. This East at the time was really anything east of Western Europe, from Slavs to East Asians. As you could probably surmise–it’s usually problematic and insulting. Although, since Vamps were an international phenomenon, this is by no means universal.

Enter Pola Negri.

Pola Negri was born Apolonia Chalupiec in Lipno (now Poland) in 1897 to a single mother. Her Slovak father was a resistance fighter sent to prison in Siberia when Negri was a small child. Now, according to Negri, her mother was from an impoverished line of Polish nobility and her father had “probably more than a touch of the bohemian gypsy in his blood.” This is probably made up. Negri averred these “biographical” details when building her image in America and reaffirmed them in her memoirs, published in 1970. It’s hard to put an exact date on when and where these fictions emerged in her life or in her career. I can speak from experience that Polish-Americans often love relating embellished tales of their ancestry, so this may have been Pola, the person, as much as it is Pola, the movie star. If it’s the latter, it would be very Pola. No one before or since has committed to a bit quite like her.

Pola started out as a successful ballet dancer in Warsaw and transitioned to acting after she fell ill with tuberculosis. She took on the name Negri after a favored Italian poet, Ada Negri. Pola found significant success on the Polish stage and she made the leap to the new medium of film in the presumed lost Slave of Sin / Niewolnica zmysłów (1914). (Yes, she did all that by 17.)

In Pola’s only surviving Polish film, The Polish Dancer / Bestia (1917), she’s an energetic young woman who stays out too late partying. After Pola flees her parents’ home, she becomes a cabaret dancer and manages to throw the lives of two men into chaos. So, Pola was cast in vampy roles from the very start. Bestia’s Vamp tale is a bit more sophisticated than a simple morality play though. Pola is a strong-willed and independent woman taking advantage of weaker men. But, Pola feels remorse. She’s a woman who carries trouble with her wherever she goes, but simply because she doesn’t hold with society’s standards and expectations for women. Whether or not Pola is the bestia (beast) referred to in the title is definitely up for debate. Pola is more a careless Vamp than a malicious one, as Theda Bara is in A Fool There Was (1914). This, of course, doesn’t save her characters from a tragic end. Pola’s Polish roles are very much akin to the types of vampy tragediennes Greta Garbo would soon stake her claim on in America.

Though Pola had played a few exotic roles in Poland, on stage and screen, it was moving to UFA in Germany that brought those roles in spades. Her success was middling in Germany until she met Ernst Lubitsch. I would liken the Negri-Lubitsch team up much like Jack Lemmon and Billy Wilder. Lemmon and Negri are both quite good on their own, but pairing with Wilder and Lubitsch brought out the absolute best in the performers. For UFA, Pola’s vampy image began to crystalize and along with that came the exotic, ethnic bent. In films like Carmen (1918) and Sumurun (1920) she plays a Romani Vamp and and “Oriental” Vamp, respectively. These films distilled the image of Pola as an agent of havoc in weak-willed men’s lives that was introduced in some of her Polish films.

The embargo on German films to America was lifted in 1919, partly due to the huge popularity of Pola’s film Madame DuBarry (1919). Pola’s impact on the American movie market was instant and many of her German films were bought up for American distribution. After an unofficial endorsement from Charlie Chaplin, Pola was signed to a contract with Famous Players-Lasky (soon to be Paramount).

Despite Pola arriving hot on the scene, the studio struggled to build her image. Pola was a new quantity. She was Hollywood’s first explicitly foreign star. A lot of effort was put into assuaging the xenophobia of American movie fans, while also highlighting her exotic nature. (Yes. In 1921, Poles were exotic.) If you recall from the Theda Bara post, in the early days of the star system the performer’s star image tied directly into the roles they played. If Negri was going to play all these femmes fatales from “the East” they couldn’t couldn’t wholly whitewash her Slavic ancestry. She’s quoted as saying at the time:

“They do not understand me. I am a child of my race, a Slav. I have no the restraint of the Anglo-Saxon.”

Essentially, Hollywood worked out the kinks of developing foreign stars for the American market with Pola. Pola was out there paving the way for Garbo once again.

Of course, Pola’s American career wasn’t a complete mess. She still made popular films–notably blockbuster Hotel Imperial (1927), directed by Garbo’s first champion, Mauritz Stiller. Pola and Paramount struggled to manage her image regardless of box office successes. Finding the line between the dramatic emotionality of Pola’s characters and the dramatic emotionality of the actress herself was difficult. A series of missteps regarding her relationship with Rudolph Valentino and his untimely death and then her untimely marriage to an impoverished Russian prince put her in a tough spot. On top of all that, talking pictures were roaring into theaters and there was likely concern about Pola’s viability as a talkie star.

But, after her divorce from said prince, Pola faced the microphone and surprisingly it was her singing that revived her faltering career. With the success of the song “Paradise” from A Woman Commands (1932), Pola hopped back over to Europe where she resumed working for the studio that made her a star: UFA. If you know anything about Germany in the 1930s, you can probably predict that these years were complicated for Pola. Hitler was fond of her work, even though her Aryanness couldn’t be proven. Pola arranged to live in France while working for UFA, but it was an arrangement built to bust. In 1938, she returned to the US and chose semi-retirement from film. Pola was getting older and the Vamp archetype that was originally her bread and butter had gone stale. In the end, I feel that many of Pola’s Vamps are the branching off point for the femmes fatales we know and loves from films noir of the 1940s and 50s.

To me, it says so much about who Pola was that she was always so willing to walk away from film. She didn’t seem to have much invested in being a huge star. Not that there’s anything wrong with that drive, but it’s such a modern-seeming departure from how film stars were managed and presented by studios in early Hollywood. Pola’s star image may have been centered on her exoticism, but it’s her fierce independence that I find so compelling.

Learn How to Get the Look BELOW THE JUMP

The Costume

Number one most important thing with a Pola costume: do not dress up as a stereotypical representation of a Romani woman. Just don’t. There’s a lot more to pull from that isn’t insulting an entire ethnic group.

The Makeup

Pola’s trademark is her heavy lids. Carve out a distinct shape with your eyes and use a dark shade almost up to your eyebrows. Use colors by all means, especially a shade that might make your eyes look deeper. For me, that’s using another shade of green. For you, it might be a blue or brown or purple. Now Pola regularly sported a glossy eye, which absolutely adds to the heavy lid look. Glossy lids, regardless of which product you’re using, is not going to last long. If you’re going out in this costume, you might want to opt for a fine shimmer as I did. That way, you won’t have to worry about touch ups.

Pola’s eye makeup somehow looks both mournful and judgmental. She’s somehow always looking down her nose at you even if she’s looking out from under her eyebrows.

The eyebrows should be distinctly drawn in though not super thick and curved to match  Heavy lids, long curved eyebrows. Like Theda Bara, leave the blush behind. Pola also had a beauty mark under her left eye that she often drew in for high contrast. I drew one on using the same dark brown shade I used on my brows.

As for lips, go with a thin silhouette and focus more on a sharp shape than a soft pout. Pola often wears a gloss over her lipstick–likely almond oil or petroleum jelly.

The Hair

Pola most often stuck to curly or wavy bobs. In some films Pola leans more toward a lob, which is trendy today, so you very well might have the appropriate hair cut already! I think I would do a full wet set if I were to tackle this look again, but I think the curling wand did an okay job. How neat you want to make the waves or curls is totally dependent on which film you want to mimic. I was going for Die Bergkatze / The Wildcat (1920) so unruly was the way to go.

Of course, Pola was high-key into turbans and headscarves. So, that’s an option.

The Clothes

This is where Pola makes it easy on modern imitators. She has a great range of (non-appropriative) costumes to choose from. I tried to recreate her mountain-dwelling attire from The Wildcat. But if you go back and look at her dance costume from Bestia (seen above), she rocks a very modern-looking gothy look. So, I’d recommend checking out a few of her films (some of her work with Lubitsch is currently on Filmstruck *nudge* *nudge*) then look in your closet and make an adventure of it. And remember, nothing is too over the top for Pola.

Read Part Two

#Pola Negri #The Wildcat #Die Bergkatze #Ernst Lubitsch #1910s #1920s #film stars #movie stars #cosplay #closet cosplay #The Vamps #vampires #Vamps #silent film #silent movies #silent era #polish film #Polski Film #german film #german expressionism #film history #foreign film #vintage #vintage inspired #teens #twenties #Halloween #halloween costumes #costume #old hollywood

[lostinyourears]

Arena Mexico Sin Piedad Report! 01/01/2019

Dalys, La Seductora & Amapola vs. Lluvia, Avispa Dorada & Jarochita

Who’s who?

Dalys in a light blue 2 piece, Seductora/Amapola both in black with Amapola having pink accents to her outfit.

Lluvia in black/white, Avispa in gold/black & Jarochita in pink.

How’s the match?

Very good, particularly the finishing stretch of this match was lots of dives from people we often don’t see dives from. This is more exciting than many of the luchadora trios matches lately and that’s a very good sign for the tecnica side who are less highlighted and this could be a boost in their standing in the division. I hope to see more matches like this from the division going into 2019. 

Akuma & Camorra vs. Yago & El Hijo del Signo, mask/hair vs. mask/hair

Who’s who?

Akuma masked in gold/black and Camorra in black with t-shirt/briefs.

Yago has mask dreads and Signo is in pants/tank top

How’s the match?

Good, last year around this time(but at Christmas) CMLL had a mask cagematch and on Sin Piedad had Negro Casas vs. Sam Adonis, hair vs. hair match. I think this match is more like the former and is pretty forgettable. I’d probably have prefered the crazy cagematch, but it is what it is. I hope that since they didn’t do it here, they might be holding onto it for a more exciting cage match with bigger names. Camorra in this match was absolutely shite, but I thought the other 3 all did good enough to save the match from being awful. Sounded like both Signo and Camorra got minorly injured here, which isn’t too surprising considering how poorly Camorra did nearly everything in this match. Yago/Signo won and hopefully this will help Yago take a step forward in his career. Akuma/Signo seemed to tease a singles feud after this, which could be a good way for Akuma to get his win back after losing his mask.   

Hijo de La Park, Volcano, Kraneo vs. Hijo del Villano III, Villano IV  & Felino

Who’s who?

Hijo de La Park looking like a skinny red/black La Park, Volcano in red and Kraneo in gold/black.

Villano’s in pink, with hijo being topless and Felino in black/orange.

How’s the match?

Great, as hyped as I was for Hijo del Villano III last week, he looked much better here. Park/Villano doesn’t have as much heat to it as Atlantis/Villano. Still it was a good tease for a feud we will hopefully get in 2019. I’ll be honest in that Villano IV is an old man wrestler and not that much of a highlight here, but at the same time he has been keeping to the wayside and letting his nephew be the star of these two matches thus far. I’ve not felt like he has been out of place yet and does what he needs to do. I hope the Villano duo continue to have matches like these first two, cause if they do I could see Hijo de Villano III becoming a star over the next year or two. 

Cuatrero, Forastero & Templario vs. Dragon Lee, Fenix & Pentagon

Who’s who?

Cuatrero has white horseshoes on his gear, Forastero in gold & Templario has silver gear with a red cross on his mask.

Dragon Lee in white/black, Pentagon in black/red & Fenix in metallic looking pants/mask.

How’s the match?

Great, It’s nice to have Dragon Lee back and it’s even nicer to see CMLL have plans for him as we saw in the aftermath of this match. I don’t really get why Sanson is missing here, perhaps to protect full NGD from a loss, but more likely just because CMLL booked him in another arena somewhere. Fenix/Pentagon attacked Lee post match, which is exciting and hopefully means we get more of the Lucha Bros together in CMLL. I sorta question the tecnicos winning here though, feels like it’d make more sense for Dragon Lee to lose the match for his team and thus be jumped. Seemed a little questionable that Lucha Bros would attack him post match... for winning the match, but maybe I missed something?

Ultimo Guerrero vs. Caristico

Who’s who?

Ultimo maskless & Caristico in white.

How’s the match?

Meh, I don’t mind this match being truncated, but it makes it hard to really praise it. Ultimo Guerrero and Caristico have matches going as far back as 2004 when they met in Gran Alternative. In the 14 years since both became big singles stars and have had classics... this isn’t one. Nothing wrong with that, but a disappointment for a main event of a show you aren’t just calling Super Friday.

Highlights :

Sine Piedad Arena Mexico Highlights 01/01/2019

#CMLL #Arena Mexico #Sin Piedad #Dalys #La Seductora #Amapola #Avispa Dorada #Lluvia #Jarochita #Akuma #Yago #El Hijo del Signo #Camorra #El Hijo de La Park #El Hijo del Villano III #Villano IV #Felino #Volcano #Kraneo #Cuatrero #Forastero #Sanson #Fenix #Pentagon #Dragon Lee #Caristico #Ultimo Guerrero

[awkwarddystopianwarlord]

Superrant

Women in action movies are predominantly dressed like idiots. That is simply the truth that cannot be denied. Whether it’s in a superhero movie or a standard action film, women are constantly dressed in ridiculous, hindering ways. Whilst their male counterparts don proper footwear, full coverage clothing, and hair that is kept out of their face one way or the other, the ladies look like they are off to a club or lunch at a cafe.

It essentially comes down to the apparent fact that men are attractive when they look ready for anything. Their clothing is easy to move in, they often have an extra shirt they can whip off to cover a wound, and they appear already prepared for the world to end before it does. Think Indiana Jones or Captain America. For our viewing pleasure as well, the clothes fit just tight enough that you can see the obligatory outline of their enormous arms. Women on the other hand are apparently only attractive when half their small amount of cleavage is out, their hair is down and flying in the wind, and they’re clothed in something form fitting but made of very restrictive fabric. Mind you this fabric fails to cover the important things like their abdomen, most of their chest, shoulders, arms, and, sometimes, legs. Wonder Woman is a perfect example of absurd bodily protection. To top that off, they are constantly put in shoes with a high heel or narrow wedge.

As someone who works solely on their feet, the concept of being in three inch heels or balancing on wedges, essentially decreasing the width of my sole by half, is an absolute nightmare. Also, as someone who has been active the majority of their life with hair that reaches my waist, there is no way I would last four seconds in a heated battle. Neither should these yahoos in these films. They would be choking on their hair, or someone would have yanked on it to deter them. The second they run on uneven terrain, which is most of the time in these things, they would faceplant numerous times due to their stupid decision in footwear.

I know this is not the fault of the actors, and oftentimes these movies are based off of something else where there is already an established character design. Another thing, I am not saying that this is the case with every action filled movie. I have my quarrel with the John Wick and James Bond films acting like suits are logical attire for killing fools. I also appreciate that heroes like Shuri, Okoye, and Captain Marvel have flat soled boots and keep their hair out of their face for the most part. It just irks me to my core that most lasses in these types of films are dressed more for their feminine aspects and less for what their character actually does for a living. It almost seems like women can’t be attractive without showing off what makes them look womanly instead of wearing something suitable for the chaos they endure in the span of two hours. It’s a damning message to send to youths who aspire to be like these people but feel as though they can’t because they dress more like the male counterparts than they do the women they look up to.

The movie industry should get their bravery on and dress the women in action films the same way they dress the men. In a way that corresponds to the occupation of the character. In a way that makes sense in the situation they end up in. It's a troubling thing to do to young audiences, making the only ladies they can aspire to be only worthy, seemingly, if they are sultry or provocative. It makes the many of us who don’t fancy looking like that feel unattractive and unfeminine. It is such a simple fix that would have a massive impact. Women should be portrayed more than just breasts and asses. Even if a strong female character comes into play, when they are dressed to showcase the common characteristics of a woman, it overshadows the good intentions of that character being equal to her male co-stars.

To note, this is solely aimed at women in action-filled movies. I’m not saying that anytime a woman shows cleavage in any film ever is a sin. I only want to point out that the costume design for this specific genre is, more than not, insulting. Just look at pictures of people serving in the military- everyone has the same, practical uniform. That is all I want from these movies. The sameness in practicality.

#superheroes #movies #writing #weeklyblog #rants

[bites-kms]

Southwest Roadtrip - Episode 1: Viva las Vegas

When it comes to discovering the US, Johnny Cash kept it simple and straight to the point: 

“I've been everywhere, man. Crossed the desert's bare, man. I've breathed the mountain air, man. Of travel I've had my share, man. I've been everywhere.“

And what a journey it was! Who knew a failed attempt to fly to Hawaii would result in such a fun adventure? We packed our stuff and jumped on a plane, destination Southwest of America. Starting by Vegas, passing through Arizona, stopping by Utah, resting in Colorado. Only my friend Belu would be as kamikaze to propose such thing and found in me such a blind partner-in-crime. It was September 4th, and we were rushing in a taxi from Hoboken to Newark to board our first flight during a global sanitary emergency, looking like Darth Vader’s close cousins with our masks and face shields. 

After an approximately 6-hour flight, we landed in the middle of literally nowhere. We were able to see the pyramid and some other iconic architecture which I currently do not remember because it was about only for 5 seconds before landing. On arrival, on a mostly empty airport, we were surprised by the amount of slot machines that were there, welcoming everyone to place their bets. For sure, ours was to have fun and contrary to common belief, the house didn't win this one: we had a blast!

Followed by a surprise “SIN CITY, WOOO HOOO!” shout from someone who obviously has been living inside a thermos for the last past months, we cracked up and went to fetch a car. This very nice gentleman took us to the Bellagio (yeap, we went full on cliche mode, with what was originally a non-existent promo) while DJ Dani blasted her best records to kick off this adventure with the right feet: Viva Las Vegas by Elvis Presley and Just a Gigolo by Louis Prima Success. 

DAY 1: 

First things first: check in and adventure. Hotel, amenities and surroundings. Vegas spins around two main areas: the famous Strip, 6.8kms of the brightest place on earth seen from outer space full of hotels, restaurants, shops and of course, casinos. Pretty much Disneyworld for adults. The Bellagio is the iconic hotel which hosts some of the greatest restaurants and also the famous dancing fountains. Also, is one that is pretty centrally located, in between Caesars Palace (Roman Empire themed), The Cosmopolitan (which imitates boheme life from France) Aria and Park MGM Las Vegas (New York City represent!), Excalibur (Middle Ages) Luxor (Cleopatra’s Egypt) and The Venetian (of course, Venice). Everything is within walking distance but beware of the heat: a normal day in the desert is around 42C (107F), if not more, with a melting down thermal sensation of 1000 in any scale. This is why is also a city that is enjoyable during night time. So, do not feel bad about sleeping in a bit: you can always chill by the pool in the morning, have a little something for lunch and sleep (or remove the hangover) during the afternoon when the sun is unbearable. OR, the casino is always open so that could be an option. We chose to walk around a bit (big mistake) but luckily once you enter to the casinos, they are all connected with escalators, shade and AC, so we were mesmerized by this grown up themed park, where is so easy to lose track of time. 

After an Italian lunch on a french bistro in a corner of Paris (? yes.. I know..) we went back and rest by the pool. Once the sun was already getting ready to bet some chips at night, we did too: we changed into our most shinny and glamorous outfit and won exactly 27 dollars! We checked out Venice, and some of the night shows that were happening on the streets (like naked promoters, the massive PM lines, and the crazy long-ass “juice” towers flowing around the more energetic covid-prone crowds) right before we headed up to Yellowtail, the Japanese and Michelin Starred restaurant at the Bellagio. We had their famous tuna pizza (it sounds terrible but it is more of a tostada or sashimi-style like) and got disappointed that they run out of the short ribs, but instead had some amazing sushi rolls and some tempura bites. When we found out about the beautiful, sigh-seeing windows that displayed all the fountain show we left our high-end attires aside and run to the windows, interrupting some other people’s dinner while leaving the waiters behind. We decided to go for dessert somewhere else and went to the piano bar located at the reception for a delicious espresso and a chocolate diamond cake. We did some neon-gazing and loved the fountain show to the beat of Believe by Cher, while being overwhelmed by a surreal feeling of actually being there, having so much fun and appreciating our friendship (and of course, avoided a high/drunk fellow who tried to take our pics and phone with them - she didnt know we were from New York and from Rio de la Plata, so the scam was on her!) 

DAY 2

Repeat. (and pretty much that’s all we did). We kicked it off with a fake breakfast by the pool, and some piñas coladas in between facemasks. We also had a light lunch by the pool (a greek salad with some much needed water) and then, around 6:15 we took a cab to the Neon Museum - yeap, for those who think there is only light fun in Vegas, nope, think again, there are worthy museums, too! ( I even made a joke here! damn I’m inspired!). The Neon Museum is a scrap dealer cemetery, where all the old and somehow “broken” -even thou most of them have been repaired and are currently working!- neon signs from Old time Vegas rest. It is very fun to see old hotels, random letters, icons and logos being laid there, creating a wonderful mess in the middle of, again, you guess right, the desert. It was very fun and beautiful to be honest. 

Another short taxi drive later (I was too naif thinking we could walk in short heels under the killer heat more than a block!) we drove thru what is known as “Old Vegas” or “Downtown Vegas”. This used to be the place where the magic happened before the creation of the Strip, but nowadays it only hosts what lingers of once a glamorous and kitschy past. The center of this action can be found throughout Freemont Street, a pedestrian long avenue that gathers classic neon signs, all-time Vegas characters (we still missed out on Elvis, so watch out impersonator, we will be back just for you!), stripers, street sellers, all you can eat venues, dodgy bars, and more and more neons.  According to Las Vegas Tourism Board>> “Fun people, crazy people, partying, gambling, drinking, street performers, free music and light shows, zip lining and just having a good time... that's what you expect at Freemont.”

We had some pizza, talked to this Montana guy who for a second thought he was able to have a threesome with us on his dirty van, were voluntary abused by these hot, ripped stripers who made us laugh with their pick up line: “You can leave your face mask here, right by your underwear too, please.” The guys were a “sample” - since the show is canceled due to the pandemic- of Chippendales, something a fine woman needs to experience once in their lifetime. Belu felt in love with her boy, but given the current times and protocols, this love couldn't prosper as we all wished it had. No worries amiga, next time!

But the most striking part of this decadent place was witnessing this surreal restaurant called Heart Attack Grill, where people who weight more than 350lbs (almost 160kgs) eat for free. The biggest burger consist on 8 patties, and as an FYI, only the 4 patty burger is marked on the Guinness World Records Book as the “Quadruple Bypass Burger” with almost 10.000 calories, all the beverages consists on massive soft drinks, milkshakes, beers and wine, (full bottles, of course, served from an IV drip bag) and it is not allowed to share food. The place is cash only, you gotta weight yourself before entering, each patty is made of half pound each, everybody must wear hospital gowns and if you dare not to finish your meal, you get three spanks by the horny yet not so sexy waitress dressed as nurses. As a nice little detail, on the biggest burger you can pump it up with 40 slices of bacon by only $7.99 more!  And, to wrap up this majestic hospital parlor, I recently researched that the legal owner of Heart Attack Grill is hilarious – Diet Center LLC. The founder is Jon Basso, who strives to provide “nutritional pornography” in his food. For a better comprehension (for a lack of a better word) of this place, you can check out this recap of Showtime’s series: Deadly Sins. 

So, we were mesmerized, we were educated, we bet, we ate, we drunk and we touched some sweaty strippers, so there was only one thing left to do: crush a weeding. So there we went. There were multiple chapels around the area, but I dont know whether it was the time (it was around, 9, 9 and coins) so it may have been a little bit too late or due to COVID, but no weddings were in place. We finally arrived to the Little White Chapel, the original, unique one that has the Elvis sign, the drive-thru and the proud sign that states how Michael Jordan and Joan Collins got married there. We were so bummed to found only a very young, very dull couple getting married (she was wearing black, hence, that is all you need to know) and there was not a very jolly, merry spirit. Still, we managed to hang out with the best men and got a picture of two to remember this fail attempt to crush this very much lame wedding. Up we went to the Bellagio, checking out what was missing from Sin City: the Wynn Hotel, Route 515, 51 and the Famous Welcome to Las Vegas Sign. 

We wrapped this unique experience witnessing an amazing, full moon in the middle of the desert, with a massive and delicious full on breakfast at Sadelle’s, a little piece of home in our far-away-from home hotel.  Till next time, Vegas! You were great fun! 

#vegas #elvis #fun #gamble #nevada #food #restaurant #casinos #covid