#(that’s a joke you can identify as trans however you want)

[iamthemaestro]

I realize I think a lot about my life in terms of “maybe when I’m a boy…” my brother in christ. maybe you are an EGG

#idk. idk! #I’m not a Man. but I do resonate with Boyhood a lot #that’s the thing #I’m still nonbinary either way #but like. what kind of nonbinary. that is the question #and more and more it feels like Boy Nonbinary #but idk what to do about that. you’d think I would after like four years of being out to people #but I don’t. like what else can I change. I’ve already got the pronouns #I think I’m like… More Trans than I give myself credit for #(that’s a joke you can identify as trans however you want) #but my ocd brain is always like well you’re not trans you didn’t trans anything #which is not true but I mean it like. if I had the chance would I? #I might. but at the moment I don’t have the chance #so I’m just. confused #constantly #it’s exhausting #I don’t feel comfortable for the most part #also intrusive thoughts go brr right now I’m trying to Think #whatever tag ramble over #gender #mine

[idolomantises]

talking abt that one thing in velma thats on my mind a lot for the past few days (that turned into a big incoherent rambling about gay rep in media)

i'm seeing jokes about how the queer representation in mystery inc being so much better than the queer representation in velma and honestly it makes me want to go on a whole tangent about my thoughts on queer representation nowadays vs the more subtle examples decades prior.

There's this weird debate that goes on online about what is "good" queer representation, and one of the most notable and honestly annoying examples is that queer representation has to be so subtle that you could easily miss it/ignore it. i've always hated that take because its a claim mostly said by straight people who are uncomfortable with seeing characters who are openly queer and/or state their identity, but they present it as some sort of push for subtle and nuanced writing. personally i do prefer it when a character just, identifies as how they are without explaining their identity, but that doesn't mean flat out explaining your orientation is inherently bad representation. its why i will always defend the very clunky and awkward high guardian spice scene. it is absolutely poorly directed and written, but that doesn't make it "bad representation". however, I do consider the character who explains that he's trans bad representation because he is flat, uninteresting and very clearly a creator self insert. he doesn't feel like a well rounded character who's also a trans man, but just an incredibly sanitized example of trans representation.

i have many, many issues with helluva boss/hazbin hotel and i do genuinely find some depictions of queer characters just flat out offensive (you can argue with me about how angel dust being written like your average 90s gay stereotype is woke actually because he has trauma, i dont care), but i do admire and appreciate that the series doesn't want to sanitize its queer characters, even if its done poorly. though i could go into a whole rant about how i find it very telling that female characters that are queer are far less sexualized or allowed to be problematic compared to their queer male counterparts.

anyways back to velma. that show does something that i've always found pretty irritating in queer representation which is just this weird lack of faith in its audience. characters can't have a slow burn anymore. internalized thoughts, anger, frustration, longing. you have to immediately know that two characters are gay for each other, even if they're lifelong enemies. its like when modern horror movies open with the gore because they're scared people are going to be bored or leave early. there's no subtlety or chemistry between daphne and velma, they're just lovers because idk, its two girls who hate each other and who doesn't love that.

then i think about how mystery inc handled velma and her sexuality, how she was allowed to be well rounded and nuanced before you slowly realize that "oh, she doesn't like boys". i know her whole thing with shaggy is controversial among fans but i always loved how she does do something pretty unlikable but not immoral. yeah, it is shitty to force shaggy to choose between her and his dog, but i can understand her line of thinking and empathize with her. and i do like how they become friends in the end despite their awkward break up. It's always fun rewatching it and realizing that their incredibly awkward and cringe relationship was meant to be awkward and cringe. it was supposed to be weird and difficult to watch, because those two weren't meant to date each other. you could see how hard velma was trying to make the relationship work despite the fact that you never get the vibe that either character was full invested in it, unlike daphne and fred's relationship.

then you had velma and her relationship with marcie, which started off as sort of a catty rivalry (not full on attempted murder, i mean holy shit hbo velma) that slowly grows to where you're completely convinced that these two did gradually like each other. and i do really enjoy stuff like that, more subtle writing like that. which doesn't just apply to queer rep btw, my favorite ships are relationships that feel understated, something you have to really dig for and pay attention to. its why i consider bubbline the best f/f representation in cartoon. because its subtle, but not too subtle where it feels out of no where when they kiss, and nuanced in ways that enhances the relationship AND characters.

there's a good amount of relationships i see in cartoons where the creator, who is usually queer themselves, often wants to depict queer relationships, but is weirdly adverse to depicting the uglier aspects of that character, and refuses to add subtlety to it. steven universe is a show i've always felt conflicted on its handling of queer representation because on the one hand i appreciate writing lesbians that are messy, traumatized and make constant mistakes. but on the other hand, the show goes out of its way to ignore these issues and/or make excuses for it, making the decision to make these characters messy and complicated genuinely baffling (this is also one of the big issues i have with catradora and stolitz).

it makes me think back to my own work too. i really enjoy making fluffy, easily digestible gay content for my followers and myself because it puts me in a good headspace. But even now and then i like exploring those little nuances too, because i don't really enjoy stories with little conflict. Because of that acknowledgement of how satisfying it is to write fluffy, queer rep, you end up putting yourself in other creator's shoes. you're so used to media that either dehumanizes gay people or tells people that they don't exist that you push yourself to make the most in your face queer rep you can but its at the cost of an interesting and subtle characters. characters that don't really have arcs or places to learn and grow.

With bugtopia i made a joke about how i want some of my queer rep to feel like you're being queerbaited. It's not literal, obviously, but mixed in with characters who are already married and in same gender relationships, i really want to write dynamics that feel subtle enough for a bit of a slow burn. even if you know they're going to end up together, to at least value the characters on their own before centering them on their relationships. queerbaiting is something that deserves all the criticism it can get, but it is embarrassing when queerbaiting feels genuinely more interesting than actual queer rep because queerbaiting has that factor of "maybe they won't get together" that adds that bit of intrigue, vs so many shows that repeatedly hammer in your head "don't worry guys, they're gonna be lesbian lovers".

mystery inc (and many other shows) being forced to keep a relationship obvious while subtle to get through censorship really forced creators to be creative with their storytelling and not center characters around their relationship and identity. but nowadays i think shows like to take the easy way out. for me, i always thought the most impactful example of queer representation in steven universe is "Rose's Scabbard". I genuinely don't enjoy that episode because it's a good example of the show thinking that trauma is an excuse for shitty behavior, but i cant deny that an entire episode of pearl breaking down and finally accepting that she wasn't the center of rose's world. it's the crew being forced to be creative and push through censors to telling a compelling story about a traumatized lesbian slowly realizing that she basically deluded herself into thinking she was someone's savior.

I think it's silly to try to place good queer representation in one box. like subtle queer rep is good, but also queer rep where a character flat out states that their gay. where I think it falls apart is when it either reinforces stereotypes without properly deconstructing or expanding on them, makes the characters so overly kind and non-controversial that the relationship is just boring, or try to make your messy and complicated characters but the narrative refuses to hold them accountable or at least acknowledge that they're doing something wrong. and to clarify on that last part, i'm not asking for some hays code nonsense where every bad person goes to prison and/or promises to stop being a bad person again. i mean the narrative doesnt just fucking sugarcoat their behavior. i don't want to see helluva boss ignore the fact that stolas made blitzo call him out for only using him for sex and then pathetically rush to justify their relationship by giving them a bizarrely sanitized and sweet backstory. and i don't want to see catra literally end the fucking universe and only do something good because she's straight up out of options and the show just decides that that was her redemption and she doesn't need to do anything to atone for what she did (including repeatedly abusing and verbally berating adora).

anyways velma has none of those interesting qualities and i'm pretty sure daphne and velma kissed because the creator is a weird pervert who thinks two girls kissing is hot.

#txt #i was thinking abt knocking off some of my longer posts on my tumblr but ya know its tumblr. its made for a blog #twitter isnt really a good place to write think pieces because its not really made for thinkpieces #i really enjoy expressing my thoughts on discourse and media but i don't want to over do it because ya know. you guys followed me for my ar #not my 2434334th post about why i think helluva boss is a bad show #but i've been thinking about sometimes prioritizing what i want to do vs what people want to see from me. so now you're getting #a long ass rant about why i think velma showing two teenagers kissing by episode 2 #encapsulates the overall issue with modern queer rep

[weirdthoughtsandideas]

PRIDE MONTH PROMPTS 2024

They are here!!

Last year I released them in May, and I asked you when I should release it this year. You agreed I should release it early/mid april. And I think the perfect time is now! You have plenty of time to prepare your things for June!

So, here are 30 prompts, 1 prompt per day, for all of June! Use them for writing, or for art, or why not for something else creative you can come up with?

I will now write all the prompts in the list if it's hard to read, plus some explanations/suggestion what you can do for them.

Day 1. Actually, I'm not straight. Someone kicking off pride month by telling their nearest and dearest that they aren't straight, like everyone seems to think!

Day 2. Surprise! We're dating! A couple comes out to their friends ;)

Day 3. Early signs. Early signs someone was not straight, or not cis. Or both!

Day 4. Gender euphoria. Euphoooooriaaaaa forever to end of time /j Ok no but yeah, someone experiencing gender euphoria :) It's great :)

Day 5. Surprise! We're engaged! Surprise engagement! Did people even know they were dating?

Day 6. Proposal. You can choose to show the proposal for the couple at day 5... or a brand new couple! :D

Day 7. Pride flags. Are they making pride flags? Buying pride flags? Identifying pride flags? So much you can do! :)

Day 8. Prideful baking. A return from last year! Who's baking? Are they doing it with pride? Are they making rainbow cakes? This is also a way to make some ships be cute together as they bake.

Day 9. Wedding. To quote Sam from Glee: "YEAH! COME ON GUYS! GAY MARRIAGE GOOD!"

Day 10. Shenanigans at the Pride Parade. Time to let those characters run wild at the pride parade!

Day 11. Coming out as trans. Pretty self explanatory I think ;)

Day 12. Planning for a child. Two women, two men, maybe a trans couple... any not-cishet couple are planning for a child <3 Are they adopting? IVF? However they're doing it, they're gonna get that child :)

Day 13. Two moms. Two mommies thriving with their kiddos!

Day 14. Are they dating or not? People are speculating the relationship of some people.

Day 15. First crush. Aww, someone's first crush! Have they ever felt this before?

Day 16. Alternate universe. Go crazy with this! This could mean anything from "a universe in which this ship is canon" to "they live in a fantasy world". Do whatever!

Day 17. Realizing they're ace. Self explanatory ;)

Day 18. Two dads. Two daddies on request (Sorry I've watched too much of Papás por encargo (Daddies on request) to not make that joke). They'll do anything for the kids!

Day 19. I thought everyone liked both? What??? They don't?????

Day 20. Fruity sleepover. Anything and everything can happen at a sleepover!

Day 21. Pining. They pine so hard and yet... will their crush ever notice?

Day 22. Secret dating. Or are they as they secret as they think? How much chaos do they end up in to keep this?

Day 23. Dinner. Maybe just a normal dinner in a queer friendgroup. Or maybe someone coming out at dinner. Maybe the first dinner at their partner's house. Or maybe someone's making dinner for their loved one.

Day 24. Confession. Coming out confession? Confession to your crush? Just a confession about your favorite food in the middle of a pride parade? Yeah, you decide!

Day 25. Date. THEY'RE ON A DATE THE BABIES!!! Is it a good date? I hope so!

Day 26. Gender is a construct. Not everything is binary.

Day 27. Queer group meeting. You can toy around with this a lot. A group meeting with closeted gays? A group meeting with every character from your different fandoms that you headcanon as bi that you want to interact in the group meeting for disaster bi's? A group meeting for aces just vibing? Maybe we'll meet a lot of different groups!

Day 28. Accidental coming out. Oops!

Day 29. Alternate time period. You want to play out a little love story but instead they live in the 1950s? Or maybe they live in the future! Maybe they live in the medieval times! Woah!

Day 30. Growing old together. Look at them now. Who knew they'd find each other in the world and now they're here?

I hope I'm gonna see some of you in pride month! It's always a pleasure! Also, when the time comes in June, and you want to use one of these prompts, don't forget to tag me ;)

#pride month prompts #prompts #pride month

[akunya]

hi ! i miraculously stumbled upon your account and can i just say wow ! its super organised and very entertaining , lets keep going okay ? i was hoping to request vox x gn or male , which ever you prefer. the idea i had was for vox and reader to do it for the first time in their relationship ? just for them to take another step and get to know each other more :) kink wise i suppose vox would be more of a teasing dom but still gentle with his lover. sorry if this is so long !! i hope this finds you well :D have a great day ! i hope we can be friends bc once again wow 🤩 okay ٩(ര̀ᴗര́)ᵇʸᵉ

so i kind of went completely off request here and made it trans m!reader instead. hopefully thats alright.

“my pretty little human boy!”

pairings: vox akuma / trans m!reader

summary: you're sad again. vox wants to show you that you are loved. tw: afab!reader. self hate, internalized transphobia (?), daddy kink, exhibitionism, groping, size difference. fluff.

notes: its rare for me to write something this sappy, but i havent had the best day today. writing this was a good outlet. i hope someone enjoys my word vomit.

also, i appreciate the kind words! thank you for sending a request. she/her + she/they + fem aligned/women DNI.

you stared at your body in the mirror, fingers pinching at the extra skin on your tummy that formed the soft rolls your boyfriend loved to grab. however, unlike his hands, yours were not filled with adoration or love: they squeezed and scratched at your skin with hate and frustration. your lover was waiting in the bedroom for you to come out - and possibly take your relationship to the next level together -while you were nearly at the brink of tears in the bathroom a few feet away from him.

you couldn't comprehend how your boyfriend could love such an average looking human like yourself. the voice demon could have anyone he chooses, and yet for some reason, his eyes laid on you. no matter how many times he reassured you that you were the most beautiful being on earth to him, your brain couldn't process the idea at all.

your hands wandered up to your chest, your face scrunching in disgust as you groped yourself. vox said he didn't care about your chest, telling you it didn't make you any less of a man. sometimes, he'd tell stories about people in his clan who also identified the same way just like yourself. while hearing his fond retellings of the people dear to him that he had lost thousands of years ago, there was a pit in your stomach that only grew whenever you looked at your body for too long. of course, vox admitted that while he would never be able to understand the feelings you were going through, he would support you with whatever decision you'd make. your boyfriend really was the greatest. you didnt deserve him. he deserved a real man to be by his side, not whatever hot mess you were.

"are you alright, honey? you've been in there for a while." vox knocked on the bathroom door, snapping you out of your thoughts. the huge mirror in the bathroom was both a blessing and a curse. eyes glued on your reflection, you didnt have time to react quickly enough when vox turned the doorknob and let himself inside. you cursed under your breath - of course you forgot to lock the door. how stupid could you be? the taller mans eyes widened, even though you had pulled your shirt down as fast as you could his sharp eyes caught everything.

"why did you have your shirt up before? having fun without me, hm?" vox joked with a smile on his face, but it quickly faded when he saw your frown. "hey, whats wrong? is everything alright?" the man cupped your small face in his hands, thumb swiping the stray tear that rolled down your cheek. you had no choice but to look up at him, every bone in your body screaming at you not to start sobbing in front of your partner. now that would be something you'd never be able to live down.

vox pulled you in for a hug, shushing and cooing at you. because of your height difference, your face was pressed against his chest, his arms gently holding you close. he hated seeing you like this. you were his little dove, his treasure, and seeing you on the brink of tears made him sad too. you sniffled a bit, the urge to cry stronger than your self restraint as you sobbed into his haori. "sshh, its alright darling. let it out." vox had rubbed your back lovingly, cradling you close as if you would break.

after a few minutes of silence, you finally pulled away from his chest, quickly wiping away your tears. the demon looked at your reflection in the mirror, causing you to look as well. his arms had practically engulfed your form, a small smile on his face. if it weren't for your tear stained face, it would be the perfect mirror picture of you two. "im sorry for keeping you waiting for so long. i didn't mean to get caught up." vox could sense the guilt filling your heart, squeezing your shoulders affectionately. "dont worry about it, really. im more concerned about you, dear. what happened?" vox's hands started running through your hair, scratching at your scalp with his long nails just like he knew how you liked it. you had started to explain how you were trying to get ready before going back to him (he chuckled at your inability to say you two were going to have sex, but decided not to tease you further), but had stopped to look at yourself in the mirror. your thoughts got the better of you and you ended up becoming engrossed in staring at your body, which you usually did. vox had turned you both around, your body in the same position it was when you were alone, except now he was behind you. seriously, when did he get so tall? "sometimes i feel like i dont deserve you. youre way too nice to someone like me.."

"y/n, shush. as much as i love hearing your wonderful voice speak, that is not true at all. i love my cute boy very much." he had turned your head to stare at the both of you in the mirror, blushing a bit when his hands started to wander. they landed on your hips first, holding you snug against himself. "you have the cutest hips. so what if they dont look like a model on a magazine? theyre gorgeous, and perfect for me to hold." vox emphasized his sentence with a little squeeze, making you laugh softly. your hips were a bit curvier than a mans, but vox didnt seem to mind.

he continued, hands squeezing the small chub of your tummy gently. he grinned, resting his head atop yours. "my boy's cute little tummy. so soft and perfect for me to lay on. abs are overrated anyways, i dont understand why you humans are so obsessed with them." you could feel the adoration spilling from his fingertips with every squeeze and caress he had given your body, and embarrassingly enough, it was turning you on. "and these.." vox slowly and carefully squeezed your chest, not wanting to hurt or upset you. you couldn't help the whimper that left your lips, the demons affection making your head spin. ".. are just as perfect as the rest of you, baby boy." he pinched your nipples with his fingers, your body on display in front of the mirror for him. he would spend the rest of his days showering his little pet in all of the affection you wanted, worshipping you every hour. "my handsome little man. you're beautiful even if you don't think so."

vox kissed the top of your head, still slowly massaging and playing with your chest as you whined. you didn't know why your brain did stupid things, but you were glad your boyfriend whisked those worries away. for being a demon, his heart was pure and made of gold. vox made a mental note to contact a certain sorcerer friend of his and see if theres any magic that could help with your appearance. while he loved you as you looked now, he'd love you just as much, if not more after any surgery you wanted to have. he ironically trusted taboo sorcery more than whatever doctors roamed the earth in this decade.

he chuckled when he noticed you rubbing your thighs together, nipples perky from all of the attention he had been drowning you in. "needy, baby?" you nodded, maybe a bit too enthusiastically but you didnt care anymore. watching vox toy with you this entire time, and seeing his devilish smirk look at your squirming body felt like torture. he laughed, hand slipping underneath your boxers. "let daddy show you how much he really loves you, okay?" you hummed in response, yanking his shirt collar and kissing his cheek.

god, he loved his little human so much.

#vox akuma x male reader #vox akuma x m!reader #vox akuma x reader #vox akuma #luxiem x you #luxiem #luxiem x m!reader #luxiem x male reader #luxiem x reader #my fics.. #nijisanji x reader #nijisanji en x reader #nijisanji en #nijisanji #nijisanji en x m!reader #nijisanji en x male reader #male reader blog #male reader #mlm x reader #mlm blog #trans reader #ftm reader #trans!reader #vox akuma x ftm trans!reader #luxiem x trans!male reader #vox akuma x trans!male reader #nijisanji en x trans!male reader

[1cecreamwillfixit]

𝕋𝕒𝕕𝕒𝕤𝕙𝕚 𝕐𝕒𝕞𝕒𝕘𝕦𝕔𝕙𝕚 - ℙ𝕣𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕪

Sub!Yamaguchi x Femdom!Reader

content includes: feminisation, rimming, anal penetration, lots of pet names, praise

I also want the be clear that this is not a trans Yamaguchi fic, in this fic he identifies as male and is amab, but just enjoys feminime praises.

Set in the future, both Yamaguchi and reader are over 18

Enjoy ;)

"You're being so good for me, Tadashi"

He was lying on his back, legs thrown over your shoulders, whimpering as you ate out his ass. You looked up and were met with the biggest, most tearful eyes you'd ever seen from him.

"Are you my good boy?" you cooed. You were expecting more of a response from him, but he didn't seem particularly affected by your words. You went back to eating him, working him back up to the edge before pulling away again.

"Or maybe you're my good girl?"

You meant it as a joke, something to get more of a reaction out of him, but you just sat back and watched in awe as Yamaguchi came all over himself with a high pitched moan. Running your hands over his thighs, you cooed sweet praises at him as he trembled from the force of his orgasm.

After he'd come down from his high, still panting, a look of realisation came over him and he blushed, closing his legs to cover himself. "Hey, 'Dashi, it's oka-"

"Can you do that again?"

A wicked smile crossed your face and you grabbed at his thighs, forcing them apart. "What was that, baby? Is my little whore not satisfied yet?" You stared right into his glazed eyes as he moaned again at the name. Thinking back, you realise he always seemed to prefer being called pretty than being called hot. Now it made sense.

"Can you prep yourself for me, bunny?" you asked, while throwing him the lube, which he grabbed from where it landed on the bed. He lay back down and began spreading lube over his fingers as you turned away to find what you were looking for.

After a few minutes of mostly silent prepping, aside from the few soft whimpers that drifted through the air as Yamaguchi stretched himself out, you returned to the bed, now equipped with a thick, seven inch pink strap on. "Pretty pink for my pretty girl" you said, running your hands through Tadashis hair.

He whined, trying to reach down for your strap to line himself up and get some friction, anything, he just needed something to rut against. However, before he had barely even started moving, you caught his hand, intertwining your fingers and pushing his hand into the mattress above his head. Your lips locked in a heated kiss and you nipped at his lower lip, relishing in the pitiful whimpers he let out.

"Please, y/n, more more mo- Nghh~"

You cut off his rambling by sinking two of your fingers into his hole and he almost screamed, hole clenching down on your fingers. "God, are you always this tight?" He could have cried, squeezing even tighter with every word of praise and playful tease you threw at him.

"Fuck me, y/n please f-fuck me now"

You laughed, loving how little it took for him to get whiny, however you gave in, unable to resist his big pleading eyes. "Ok princess, open up for me" He obeyed, spreading his legs even wider and arching his back seductively, staring up at you with lidded eyes. "Good girl, 'Dashi. So perfect, all for me."

Lining the tip of the strap up with his hole, you thrust in gently, working him open until you bottomed out. Tadashi whined and squirmed underneath you as you waiting for him to adjust, little gasps escaping his lips.

"Hic- y/n please, fuck me now I-I need it so ba- Agnhh"

You pounded into his tight little hole, watching as he clamped down on it, making in hard for you to move as he kept sucking you in. "Fuck, princess, has your pussy always been this tight? Or are just that horny today?" Tadashi wailed, eyes crossing from how overwhelmed he was. He loved it and just wanted more and more until he was lost in the pleasure.

Just as he seemed to be reaching the edge, you pulled out, enjoying the tears that welled up in Yamaguchis glowing eyes. You put your hands on his bony hips, rubbing soothing circles into the skin to calm him down. Once his breathing had slowed a little, you let your hands travel slowly up his stomach, teasing your fingers over the smooth skin until you reached his chest.

"You think I'd let you finish without giving these cute little tits the attention they deserve?"

His mouth opened to respond, but you cut him off by taking one of his nipples into your warm mouth. You heard a sharp intake of breath, followed by a series of quiet whines. You switched to the other nipple, laving your tongue over the pretty pink bud and you felt his hips buck up into your stomach.

You pulled away again, your wandering hands landing on his thighs. You grabbed two handfuls of the squishy flesh, massaging them in your hands before pushing his thighs up to his chest. "Can you hold yourself open for me, bunny." He gulped nervously but complied, cheeks flushing pink from the exposing position.

You thrust back inside him, bottoming out in one thrust. Yamaguchi screamed, eyes rolling back in his head. You thrust into him again, setting a fast rhythm just to hear the strangled hiccups he let out as he broke from the pleasure.

"Fast- hic-, faster y/n fuck, pl-lea-ease mOre -hic"

He was babbling, drool running down his face as he struggled to close his mouth. His tongue was hanging out of his mouth, twitching as he moaned.

"Anything for my pretty girl." Your thighs were burning from exertion, but you sped up regardless, knowing you would be in pain tomorrow. It all felt worth it as you watched Yamaguchi fall apart beneath you.

"Anything for you, Tadashi"

thats the final one of the fics being crossposted from my Ao3. if you want to request another, please do, my request rules are pinned on my page. i really do want to get back into writing, so if you have anything that you want to share please do, even if i wont be able to add much to it.

#fanfic #dom reader #anime #haikyū!! #haikyuu!! #sub haikyuu #haikyuu dom!reader #yamaguchi tadashi #sub yamaguchi #yamaguchi tadashi x reader

[blimbo-buddy]

I also have an idea to recontextualize leafpool’s arc. And I wanted it to involve her fragile transfemininity and lesbianism and how she’s so critical of herself and fears that she would never be a “true lesbian”.

because i take inspiration from powderseas’s interpretation of squilf and I really do like the interpretation but I like to see leaf as a polar opposite when it comes to her relationship with transgenderism.

while squilf is way, more confident and fluid with her gender expression. Not letting micro labels get in the way of who she is. leafpool fears that if she tries to be somewhat fluid with her gender expression she would be treated as a joke and a man. So she stick to gender stereotypes and roles. The difference between her and her brother is that squilf is confident and ultimately happy with himself and allows him to be whoever he wants to be. leafpool has been hurt, and in turn she regurgitated into gender roles and stereotypes.

because at that time she identified as a nonbinary lesbian but when the only person she trusted crowfeather calls her a “ugly delusional man who just wants to get with lesbian” she breaks. now she only identifies as a trans woman. he tries her best present, more feminine, she loses weight. Tries to do voice training. Even try to trim some excessive fur on her face, now she’s stuck in a dilemma of trying to be her self and trying to fit a object that people might like.

leaf dysphoria in a nutshell 

This is such an interesting portrayal, Marina. You don't often see people portray gender dysphoria that much to such extreme degrees. I like the reference to powdersea's portrayal of SquirrelFlight's relationship with being trans and how it contrasts with LeafPool's relationship with it.

Gender dysphoria is very much a real thing, not every single trans person will go through it, but it still exists. It's important, at least I believe it's important, to get out there that gender dysphoria can be nasty, it can be soul crushing and awful, but by portraying it, it sort of lets those who have/are going through it some sort of comfort, that they are not alone.

The topic of transgender characters and their experiences/relationships with it can be anything, it can be however one would like to write it as long as it's handled properly. Sometimes you get those who support you, sometimes you feel comfortable with yourself, but sometimes there are people who don't feel that way. Like with LeafPool, you mentioned that CrowFeather makes transphobic remarks about her and even before that, LeafPool struggles immensely with her lack of self confidence towards wanting to transition, things like this happens in the real world, it exists! I really like what you've done with LeafPool, Marina, it's very interesting, thought provoking, and also brings light to those who might be in a similar situation like your version of LeafPool is in. Perhaps even finding comfort in it, even if she isn't real, it still feels all the better knowing that people know that your struggles are known and shared, To feel like you need to force yourself to abide by some fake fucking "do's and don'ts of being trans" rules that people just made up. It's important to talk about it, to portray it with care, not every trans experience will be the same, some will have a good time with it while others will have a horrible time with it, all that matters is that you're here and you're doing great

#blimbo rambles #ask #wc #transphobia cw #gender dysphoria #transphobia tw #just in case

[enzymedevice]

Long pinned post because I got excited about the idea of embedding a lot of hyperlinks

Greetings! I’m Enzyme or Q, and I’m an asexual transneutral person who uses he/him pronouns. The primary word I use to describe myself is "goth" and I like comics, robots, weird films, visual kei and fashionable gay people ✨

Other equalities data that may be helpful for some people to know:

I have autism, Tourette's and an intersex variation; I identify as disabled, am mostly white-passing and have a mixed-religion upbringing that has led me to identify as agnostic. I don’t live in the US.

With regards to what you’ll find on this blog, I work in sex ed and aim to work in funeralcare so there’ll be some heavy or sexual content here - often in the form of stupid jokes - that I don’t tag for. I do tag for gore, however, under gore cw. If you notice me posting things you’re uncomfortable with under a certain tag, please block that tag.

My visual art can be found under the tag my art.

My poetry (a hit on my DeviantArt but a cringe footnote in my Tumblr history) can be found under the tag my poetry.

If you’d like to see only my art relating to my favourite subject matter, I can present you with gay people grimacing, which is exactly what it says on the tin.

I also have a tag for appreciating other people's art! Most of my blog is this.

I try to tag fandoms/subjects appropriately! These don’t represent my favourite things in general, but my most oft-used fandom tags are probably for Doctor Who, Naruto (more specifically Orochimaru), JoJo, Dracula, Castlevania (games and TV series), Cats the musical, DC Comics (more specifically Legion of Super-Heroes), The Case Study of Vanitas, Pokémon (more specifically Team Rocket) and Homestuck. Additionally, I like a bunch of horror/gore/weird antiquated media that crops up from time to time. In terms of subject matter, I currently also use the tags goth stuff, trans stuff, undertaker stuff, robots tag and placeholder cannibalism tag, the cannibalism tag I wanted a delicious name for but nothing bit :(

I know that writing a DNI won’t actually act as a preventative measure since anyone can just go on the internet and lie but considering I’m in my 20s I would prefer that anyone under 18 interacting with me proceed with caution since the content I share is not for you. This isn’t a slight on you, merely a personal boundary I choose to set.

Likewise, visible TERFs, trans/homophobes, racists/Islamophobes/antisemites, ableists, people arguing about shipping in a way that annoys me, people with a DNI criterion that resembles me or anyone else that just rubs me the wrong way for no discernible reason will be blocked on sight. It’s no big deal, I just prefer to look at things on here that don’t make me sad.

If I express enjoying some problematic media, please assume that I’m aware of all the things wrong with it and have, offline in my own time, unpacked its nuances, cherrypicking the things I like about it to uplift online.

… That's all I can think of to write! No one will read this ever.

[auxiliarydetective]

Thanks so much for your ask @faerieroyal !!! As usual with my beloved Kit, you'll be getting answers for both 80s!Kit and movie!Kit, so buckle up!

1. Can your OC admit to mistakes or weaknesses? Can they accept help?

Oh boy, both of them are so bad at admitting to not being the best™.

80s!Kit might be a little better at admitting to mistakes of character. She'll at least admit to being "a little stubborn" or "slightly impulsive". However, she hates having to say that someone beat her in a fight or - even worse - she may have possibly been kidnapped and can't get out on her own, and she hates having to be rescued because she failed to protect herself. Hannibal gets to save her after he learned not to rub it in her face. B.A. gets to save her because she loves to see the look on her captors' faces when he stares them down. Murdock gets to save her because he has never rubbed it in her face and never will - he's trying to get her to understand that getting saved is okay. Face does not get to save her. It's supposed to be her saving him. He's her damsel in distress, not the other way around.

Movie!Kit, on the other hand, will admit to being physically weaker. He's strong, alright, but he's an acrobat, not a strongman. Too much muscle mass would get in the way of his flexibility and it would be too heavy. However, he is always right. That's a law and that's a fact. There's only one person that can make him admit that he was wrong, and that's Face, with his power to make Kit's brain and heart melt with his kisses. Hannibal, however, knows how to harness this power for himself.

6. Are they dramatic?

80s!Kit isn't very dramatic. She prefers staring people down or walking away - or punching them. If she gets injured, she's gonna play it off or ignore it, usually with less than optimal results.

Movie!Kit is SO dramatic, especially if in the presence of Murdock and/or Face. These three together are the kinds over people kidnappers would give back willingly if they had only two of them, let alone three. They'll call Hannibal to pick up his kids because they're sick of these clowns and their constant whining and chattering and joking around. Also, Kit sometimes dramatises his injuries if he wants to be carried. His precious acrobat's limbs need to be protected. Ever heard of fatigue fractures? Or maybe he pulled a muscle, who knows...

7. How would they prefer to die?

Both of them want to die young and quickly. As much as they love their found family and their life, they can't imagine growing old or settling down. However, "young" is a very vague term here, because they probably wouldn't mind getting close to Hannibal's age if they're still as healthy as him then. And they'll definitely take a slow and painful death if it means their loved ones will be saved.

8. What is guaranteed to make them angry?

Everything? No, it’s not that bad, but both variants of Kit are very hot-headed. Criminal offense #1 is hurting Face, #2 is hurting the rest of the team. But now for some variant-specific reasons:

80s!Kit gets especially mad if kids are in danger. She will beat anyone up who even dares threaten a kid.

Movie!Kit, being trans, definitely wages war on transphobia. Talking shit? You get hit. This extends to homophobia as well. If his opponent is lucky, Kit will leave it at summoning Face just to make out with him in front of the homophobe's face. Generally, anyone who shows any bias against people who are not cishet, male and white will be flattened, but he shows the least mercy when it comes to transphobia.

9. What do they get really petty about?

80s!Kit gets petty about her gender. "Are you a woman?" "No!" "Are you a man?" "No! I don’t identify as a man or woman. I might occasionally feel like it though. I'm both and neither. What's there not to understand?" "So you identify as genderless? How does that even work?" "No. Weren't you listening? If you don't stop being stupid, I'm gonna start identifying as a problem, fool!"

Movie!Kit is an acrobat, not a gymnast. Yes, he does gymnastics, fine, but he's an acrobat, because he's an artist, specifically a circus artist. Do not call him anything but an acrobat.

Thanks so much for the ask, Dolly, my beloved! It was really fun to talk about Kit again!

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Taglist: @starcrossedjedis @oneirataxia-girl @daughter-of-melpomene and my beloved A-Team girlie @datasgirlfriend - let me know if you’d like to be added or removed!

#the a team #a team oc #the a team 2010 #oc: kit kelley #oc: movie!kit #ask #evie's ask extravaganza

[uranium-city]

@june-doe-event’s June Doe is finally here & with that I made my first entry to the with the pride prompt!! Here are a bunch of ramblings about my headcanons for the choir!! Maybe I’ll do little icons or something in the future but for now I just wanted to write my thoughts in the incoherent mess that is these few paragraphs 😭

Ocean is an asexual lesbian! As someone who only likes women she just radiates those vibes, it takes one to know one, y’know? Anyways with Ocean’s strong need to conform to societal standards I can very much see her as someone who suppresses their sexuality to feel more desirable by society. Girlypop’s got a lot of internalized homophobia she’s working through & is the last member of the choir to come out. The rest of the choir lowkey realizes she’s queer before she does 😭. She’s very “[Woman] is so pretty… but I’m NOT gay guys I’m NOT GAY!!” 

The ace part is pretty self explanatory. Throughout the whole musical Ocean is repeatedly disgusted by anything & everything sexual. While it could be argued she does this to keep up her goody-two-shoes, moral persona, the fact that her acting like this only serves to antagonize her from the rest of the choir leads me to believe it’s less of a “Look at how moral I am!! You should vote for me!!” thing & instead a bit more personal. Her putting down Noel, Constance, & Ricky for expressing sexuality most certainly will not get them to vote for her I feel like she’s saying these thing just because that's genuinely how she feels about sex. 

I posted this the other day but I’ll add it again here since I wanna make this point “I always found it odd how in Every Story’s Got a Lesson straight A student, miss smarty pants Ocean O’Connell Rosenberg interprets the lesson behind Romeo & Juliet to be “teen sex kills” & not that baseless hatred leads to unnecessary bloodshed. I’m sure it’s just a throwaway joke & doesn’t matter at all.. HOWEVER I will be using this to spread my ace Ocean agenda. No one that smart misinterprets such a simple message like that unless they already view sexual relationships in an inherently negative light.” Big sex-repulsed ace vibes to me.

Noel is canonically a gay man so there’s that. In my mind he’s a cis man but enjoys presenting himself in a fem-leaning lense. Like he definitely would’ve gotten into drag if he had lived & doesn’t mind she/her pronouns despite identifying as a dude. He’d probably get all giddy if you referred to him as Monique. Overall just very comfortable in his identity.

Mischa is THE bicon of all time. I feel like it took him a while to realize that as well but not because of internalized homophobia like Ocean but instead because he just?? never really thought of it as an option?? Mischa’s not homophobic in the slightest but grew up in a country where queerness is typically regarded in a negative light & because of that the thought of him being queer never really crossed his mind. It wasn’t until he met Noel that he was like “Wait… man can actually like man?? Like romantically?? …like actually??! Woah... that’s awesome..”. I also like the idea of Mischa being polyam because he has two hands Goddammit & one’s for Talia & the other is for Noel. 

I feel like the entire RtC community collectively agreed on Ricky being trans which is really funny to me /pos. In my mind he’s gender-fluid & uses any pronouns & is usually referred to with he/him due to being masc presenting. I don’t really have any strong opinions on whether he’s transfem or transmasc I just know that he hasn’t got a cis bone in his body lmao. I feel like I tend to gravitate towards transfem since that seems to be the most common headcanon in the fandom but transmasc Ricky has really been starting to grow on me. I like the idea that despite the language barrier he faced & more traditional urban-ness of Uranium City he was able to express himself through transitioning & presenting more masculine. He’s not a trans man but he’s typically more comfortable settling with a masculine identity so it’s the best way he can express himself to a town that’s not understanding of his identity as a genderqueer person. + he was actually played by a transmasc actor once & that’s really cool!! Either way, trans Ricky is so real & I love how creative the fandom is when applying that headcanon to aspects of the musical like with the many interpretations of what Savannah meant to Ricky. Sexuality wise?? He definitely likes women & is either flat out only attracted to women or bi with a heavy female lean. 

Jane Doe doesn’t even know her own name let alone her sexuality. But that can’t stop me from giving Penny Lamb headcanons >:]

Despite the fact that I think about Penny the most out of the choir I never really could settle into a set lgbt headcanon for her?? I would love to say that Penny’s a lesbian but Legoland is very complicated with how it portrays her sexuality. Like it comes across that Penny does like men with her remarks on Johnny Moon & is only bullied for being a “lesbian” since this is the 2000s & being homophobic to the weird kids was the norm back then. But also?? Penny is pretty much implied to not even know what a lesbian is?? With her sheltered upbringing in Elysium it’s possible she didn’t even know what the concept of being queer was until she started being bullied at St. Cassian. Like if she didn’t even know being queer was a thing until she was like 15 then I highly doubt she has any sort of grasp on her identity. Like this isn’t your everyday normal comphet, this is… ADVANCED comphet.. + with all the Ride the Cyclone productions that have so many different futures for Penny (or whoever Jane is brought back as) including ones where she takes a husband, outside Legoland sources saying Penny’s not gay, but also the knowledge that Legoland is admittedly dated & if it were to be revised in modern day it would likely make Penny queer or at least leave it ambiguous since it’s more appropriate, I am so endlessly confused. I like lesbian Penny a lot !! I would like for it to be semi-canon but I definitely wouldn’t die on the hill that it is because of the way Legoland is written. Anyways those are my thoughts.

On a more brief note I feel like Penny’s agender but in a really apathetic way. By that I mean she just does not care at all. She doesn’t mind being referred to as a girl, she just doesn’t feel very connected to it. She doesn’t feel really connected to any other identity either, like in regards to gender she feels like she could just take it or leave it lol. She was born female & has such been referred to with feminine terms her whole life so that’s she’s become used to it, but if one day everyone around her inexplicably started referring to her with masculine terms she’d just continue her day like “oh okay that works too I guess.” 

Additionally Ezra shares the same feelings surround gender except that he’s accustomed to masculine terms instead. The main difference is that if you asked Penny her pronouns she’d probably be like “Oh I don’t really have a strong preference, thank you!” while Ezra would be like “Gender is a socially constructed scam created by the U.S. government to sell more toys at the McDonald’s. I am above that meandering capitalist propaganda. Do not refer to me.”

& finally Constance I go back & forth from her being the STRONGEST straight ally known to man & her being pansexual. (She does claim to see the gold, the pink, & the blue… coincidence?? I think not… /j.) Either way she definitely threw everyone little parties when they came out with cupcakes decorated as pride flags. She very supportive regardless of if she herself is queer or not. & while I hadn’t thought about this before, my one ace friend brought up that the way she regards sex as just something she needs to get out of the way comes across as ace reminiscent & I’ve been thinking about that a lot. I can def see her as being on the ace spectrum!! To me she doesn’t experience a complete lack of sexual attraction & definitely isn’t sex repulsed like Ocean but falls in the middle of ace & allo. Gray asexual Constance is very real to me. 

#june doe #ride the cyclone #ocean o'connell rosenberg #noel gruber #mischa bachinski #ricky potts #jane doe #penny lamb #ezra lamb #constance blackwood #pride

[unsleepingtales]

Vulture Dimension Time I’ve got my ice cream let’s do this it’s our time it’s our year

Everyone’s outfit is Fantastic today

Some good ol fashioned summer fun

The vulture dimension is great right

They’re actually doing this. I keep thinking oh they’ll just do a normal episode but no they’re fully gonna do this but for however long it takes

That’s such a fair assumption gorgug. I would also think I had died.

Why did you do this to yourselves

‘It’s not gonna work any other way than the way I want it to’ this is so Brennan’s revenge

All that buildup <3

Trans joke trans joke

From the vibe they all had. Absolutely.

Love gorgug trying to do plot things in the vulture dimension

Oh Zac is GONE

Are these real

HOMEBREW ALERT: Feather of the Vulture King: Breaking this oily feather summons 1d4 vultures. They are not under your command.

I want these items so badly.

Cassandra glowed from that??

Oooh new battle board camera angle!!

It’s not yesterday! What a good motivational statement.

Devastating.

God he hit her for 20 dmg off a cantrip and she did 22 from a 5th level spell that really is devastating

Woooo hit himmm

Get off my lawn!

Gorgug has So much to be mad about here

(Brennan rolling too many dice)

One of my favorite things about dropout are the captions <3

Riz giving his silvery barbs advantage to Fabian after the bardic/least favorite friend exchange is. I’m thinking and feeling things.

Nat 20 luck check is incredible

Ally.

THIRTY NINE

NICELY DONE FABIAN

So… what happens at school now?

Go homeeeee get out of my house

What are you doing baby girl

Why are you doing this

Emily you HAVE a nose piercing. It’s not a septum but cmon.

DO YOU HAVE A WARRANT

Gorgug is so done I love him so fucking much

I am the exact same way when it’s been too long a day with too many things.

GET HIS COP ASS GORGUG

Oh the identify spell has a radio filter on now that’s fun

What’s threatening the existence of the school at the folk festival?

Riz art hiiiiiii

Siobhan’s outfit is so great

Red light??

Copperlilly caterpillar <3

Three cheers for stage tech arcana.

Like the 24 point stars from the book?????

Enchantment effect?

OH MY GOD

Rage effect. Fucking hell.

I so wish I could hear about spells being cast through concerts without thinking of uhv. Unfortunately I cannot.

Guys. Guys.

No! Eat it now! Don’t give him hot sauce mom!

Just fun videos to look back on

Nobody noticed Zac saying Kristen the rats can’t vote and that’s criminal bc it was SO funny

He frenched the vulture king

How good can a rat’s history check possibly beeeee

Ooooh Lucy was doing necromancy?

NO

There’s definitely not a rat world under the school 💀

Awwwww

Spot needs to be the next d20 plushie

Oh god

Oh nooooo

Gross

RIP Spot 💔

THAT TRAILER EDIT WAS SO CLEAN

ALSO WHAT THE FUCK THOUGH

She died so recently ok

Add it to the fucking pile

Fig’s dad is an archdevil I think she can afford wizard class

HELLO????

An unholy last rites. That’s so fucked.

Oh SHIT okay

Did Lucy’s party turn on her?

Holy shit that’s intense

Here there be giants?

Christ

Work a miracle Kristen

Who’s the fuckin turncoat man

God they’re so good at being teenagers

Kristen just literally saved someone’s soul. Good lord.

Saint Kristen Applebees.

Oh my god.

Holy shit! Nice job Kristen!

I hope they can reach Cassandra somehow. I honestly can’t tell if the resolution of this arc is letting them go or finding them through work and either one is beautiful but I love Cassandra and I want them to be okay.

Where do you live 😭

Oh godddd

They’re being really inconsistent with the days of the week and I can’t tell if it’s on purpose time quangle/exhaustion stuff or if it’s just a mistake. Like, the party was on a Friday night and then the next day was Sunday. The festival was on a weekend day and then the next day was also a Saturday. It’s bugging me.

Yeesh.

DID THE DIRT MAKE HIM MAD (am I overthinking this)

Consigliere of the geeks

Sklondaaaaaa

Devastating

I’m unbelievably wealthy and me and my friends just discovered the site of a double homicide #justgirlythings

Fabian is taking care of them and I love him so much for it

Please please please

YAYYYY PORTENT

Oh I just read such a nice fic about Adaine studying barbarian stuff with Gorgug <3

HE CAN DO THIS

Teddy bear of helpfulness holds concentration, would he be able to use that whole raging?

Gorgug Thistlespring my BELOVED

I felt weird about being mad 😭😭

But he doesn’t burn and pillage and murder! That’s not how the bad kids adventure

God porter annoys me

WOOOOOOO GET THAT MCAT

The Last Stand exam

oh god if Kristen gets moved to pass/fail what happens to the others

Oh fuck Gorgug

RIZZZZZ

HES THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED TO TAKE STRESS FOR OTHERS

Henry encouraging gorgug to build a time machine?

Oh thank god he’s still on the owlbears

I think I have to lie down. He’s me.

The fact that their relationships with their parents are suffering because of this is fucking heartbreaking

Bitch fuck all the way off ok

It’s fine it’s all fine everything’s peachy I love my life 🥲

Awwww is Aelwyn gonna visit Adaine at work

ALSO Cait May said Aelwyn’s art was based on her mini. Which means we’re gonna see an Aelwyn mini. Which I’m so excited for.

Glad to see Aelwyn is still Aelwyn

Oh nooo

CLAMFACE CUNTHEAD

CLAMHEAD CUNTFACE

What in the worldddddd

COTTONCANDY BITCHFUCK

Adaine Abernant and Siobhan Thompson I love you so so much

Yeah what does happen if Gorgug is affected by the rage magic.

It’s our time! It’s our year!

#fantasy high junior year #reactions #verbal component

[askatrigenderlgbt]

Hey everyone, this post is going to be a bit different. Pride month is nearing an end and I was ask to make a special something for this project I'm in.

I want to talk about my journey with discovering my sexuality and gender identity, along with my battle with my disability battle with ADHD.

I was around 15 or 16 when I started to question my identity. I didn't understand what or why I was different from everyone else around me. I didn't understand why I faked being in love with boys or found myself only falling in love with fictional boys but not real guys. Then I began to think harder. I realized that maybe I wasn't so straight.

As I was finding my way I explored different labels, explored my gender, and eventually finally admitted that I needed therapy for my health.

At first I thought I was bisexual and nonbinary. At the time it felt correct, but time past and I realized it didn't make sense or feel right. I needed to keep looking. Then I identified as lesbian and demigirl, but once again later down the line they didn't feel like me.

Finding your identity takes time, trying things out for a time and seeing what makes you feel you. There is no rush, no impending doom waiting around the next second.

I finally found my gender when I was looking online about different genders in the trans and nonbinary umbrella: trigender.

Trigender is a gender similar to gender fluid. One identifies as three genders, whether all at once- like a mix of colors- or flux between the three- like colors melting into another.

Trigender was the labe that felt right, where I felt myself click into place. I felt like a woman, a man, but in between- nonbinary. It made sense and felt just right for me.

As for my sexuality? I am still into women, but I now use Gynosexual as my label. It is a gender neutral way to say that a person is attracted to women identifying genders or feminine traits. Which I am.

I also figured out I am ageosexual. Ageosexual is a sexuality on the asexual spectrum. Ageosexual is a sexuality where one isn't disgusted seeing anything sexual in nature, able to watch 'adult fun' without being uncomfortable, but still having no desire for sexual intercourse of any kind.

I can handle a sex scene or joke in media, but even the thought of actually having sex makes me uncomfortable and nauseous. I don't like even the thought of anyone I may date in the future see me naked, god forbid touch me.

I will hold hands, kiss on the cheek, peck on the mouth, cuddle, hug, but anything else is a no. Just no.

So after finding the labels that fit me and have found myself comfortable with them, I settled on my pronouns next: they/them. I didn't like being referred to as just she/her, just female. I liked the more neutral they/them as it feels better and more like me. It felt right. But everyone around is still having to get used to my pronouns and using them. Learning is still going on, my family no used to my pronouns as they spent years with my old ones.

But my mental health during this? I went to see a therapist at 16, working on my depression and anxiety first. I was prescribed medication to help deal with my issues and given tools to help manage what the medication can't. Medicine isn't a cure for mental health, it just helps manage the issues one has.

After I was given the starting tools I worked on myself and tried hard in high school. I was more energetic, I felt less tired, and I had more motivation. It didn't last however. I began to have issues with attention, I kept getting distracted easily, forgot things constantly, was restless, overall a mess without knowing why.

Then my doctor prescribed me with a medication I recognized my mother taking. It was one she took for her bipolar. So I thought for a while I had bipolar, stupid I know but hey I wasn't thinking clearly. But soon I was diagnosed with ADHD, given medication and tools I needed to manage things, and found myself more relaxed- and given confirmation that I do not have bipolar. I could sleep longer than four hours. I could finally have my thoughts slow down. I even could focus better.

But the struggle wasn't done. You see, during one summer on a boiling hot day, I tried to end my life by heat stroke. I had turned my heater on full blare on the hotest day that week. Then I took a nap, hoping to anyone listening that I wouldn't wake up. I woke up, drenched in sweat, realizing what I nearly done. I turned off the heater and quickly tried to cool myself down. I only confessed about till six to seven months after that happened. This was when I was around 19, probably 20. I had dropped high school before this, the stress of dealing with family problems, moving, and the pandemic just beginning. I wasn't great mentally.

I have also experienced cutting before, something common sadly with people dealing with depression and constant stress. It wasn't a good feeling. The pain of cutting was not what I enjoyed ever, but I am ashamed to say this, but I did like how it made me numb to everything.

In the present day I am much better, not perfect but not a mess, I'm simply okay. I've been through so much and have many years to go hopefully. To end this post as it is long enough as it is I will say this:

Your journey will not be like anyone else's, it's your life and you will find the pieces of yourself in time. You just have to find what feels right and what is comfortable. You may have a hard time with your disabilities, mental or physical, but you have support around you ready to help. There are people who want to help you get better, you'll find them. I know it. Just be kind to yourself, allow time to feel out what it is you need. And allow yourself to make mistakes.

The worst thing I ever did was try to be perfect, to be strong. In actually, it's okay to be weak and to be imperfect. We all need to learn by making mistakes, grow from them. And sometimes we need to let out emotions, to stop trying to hold everything inside.

It's okay to be yourself.

#the pride of june #mental health #my story #trigender #depression #anxiety #adhd #ageosexuality #gynosexual

[jibbi]

Unpopular opinion: Sam Smith is cool & valid

CW: transphobia, nonbinary hate

Every time I see an article pop up about Sam Smith, there’s a bunch of nasty, transphobic comments and jokes from people even if it’s not an article related to Sam’s gender. And, additionally a lot of people keep saying “Sam Smith has changed so much!”

It all makes me genuinely angry because Sam Smith is such a cool person and talented singer.

So, here is my post defending them because they are so valid and undeserving of the hate and ruthless laughs they’ve been getting.

Their gender identity

I can’t remember when exactly, but I BELIEVE it was a few years ago that Sam came out as nonbinary, stating their preferred pronouns are they/them. Cool. Good for Sam. I was and still am happy for them!

But of course, after this, a lot of people didn’t want to respect this. So, Sam has been continuously misgendered and called “delusional” (which is sadly very common transphobic behavior).

It’s really sad to me that there are still so many close-minded people out there who can’t accept people using gender neutral pronouns and don’t understand that they literally use they/them pronouns singularly ALL THE TIME for strangers with indeterminable gender. Like, bigots, use your brain for two goddamn seconds…

“Oh there’s someone sitting over there. I don’t know who they are.”

“I haven’t met my new neighbor yet but I heard they have a dog. Their dog barks a lot at night. I don’t know how that doesn’t bother them.”

You can also do a very quick Google search and find out that they/them has been used singularly for centuries now. It is basic English language.

It is not strictly plural and not used only when referring to more than one person. The proof is there.

Also if you’ve had the luxury of never having to worry or question your gender at any point in your life, it must be fucking nice, because us trans and enby people have not had that luxury. And, what makes it even harder is that society squishes gender into boxes.

But, you see, enby folks don’t fit into these boxes. They don’t fully identify (or don’t identify at all) with their assigned gender at birth.

Coming from me who’s trans enby, at first, I didn’t fully understand how someone can internally feel that they’re a woman, a man, or neither. I can understand where that confusion comes from. However, I got some clarity and realized there can be a lot of internal discomfort over having to view yourself as the gender you were given at birth and that others perceive you as that gender. Or, that maybe you simply have a stronger preference of feeling a different gender (or none) over the one given to you.

I remember reading a really great article about Sam Smith regarding their perspective on this. Sam said they’ve always felt they’re nonbinary, and that they feel just as much womanly as they do manly (not the exact wording, but something along the lines of that). And seriously, good for them for confidently explaining that! That open representation is so important.

The change in their appearance

I will say that this is absolutely a mountain made out of a mole hill.

Sam gets put down for their weight and their fashion choices that don’t “flatter” their figure. It is truly disgusting to me that people bring their weight into this. People naturally lose and gain weight, it’s not uncommon. It shouldn’t be seen as gross or controversial. We’re all human.

In my opinion, Sam’s outfit and costume designs are so amazing and very fitting for who they are as a person. Also, you can just look at Sam and see how happy they are being themselves and wearing what they want to wear. There’s so much pure joy and confidence.

I feel like Sam really came into their own with both their identity and fashion sense, which I have such strong admiration for. I don’t know how people can tear others down for finding themselves and doing what obviously makes them very happy. I think it’s a lot of self projection.

It’s not that there’s anything wrong with wanting to fit into the typical styles women and men have - that’s perfectly okay! It’s a problem when you feel it’s okay to force others to fit into the “normal” type of fashion. And, honestly, I’m willing to bet if all kinds of style were completely acceptable in society, a lot of those same people who make fun of people like Sam would also develop their own sense of style that wouldn’t necessarily fit what’s currently deemed as “normal.”

Also, I wanted to mention one of the most controversial outfits (aside from the one where Sam’s nips were out) - the devil suit and hat. This was seen as worshipping and promoting Satanism despite it being one of Sam’s more reserved outfits.

But, legit, it was a costume for a song that is called Unholy?! It fits the narrative of the song and doesn’t even measure up to the level of controversial past singers’ costumes that are - as we’ll say - unholy.

The change in their music

Putting Sam’s presentation aside, there are people who think Sam has changed their style of music, too. But, as an active listener of their music, I can tell you this has only been the case for their more popular songs lately.

Unholy and I’m Not Here to Make Friends are undeniably different from Sam’s old popular hits. However, if you are in fact a big fan of theirs, you would’ve listened to their latest album and known that most of the songs on there are still in fact very much the same style as their past hits.

If you preferred Sam’s style of music before Unholy and I’m Not Here to Make Friends became popular, listen to their other songs on the latest album Gloria. I highly recommend How to Cry, Fire on Fire, No God, and Lose You. They’re still very much the same as Sam’s older hits and are absolutely beautiful songs.

Conclusion

I think Sam is amazing. They’re just being themselves and they’re incredible for showing others it’s okay to embrace your own personal identity and style.

I don’t think Sam has done or said anything foul that would make people hate them, unless I’m unaware of something that happened. So, from what I’m understanding, they’re a joke to a lot of people - particularly the bigots - simply because they’re being the person that they are.

It’s easy for these people to sit behind their computers at home and pitch a fit about Sam “changing” and say nasty things about them. They’re definitely jealous that they don’t have half the talent and confidence Sam has, plus the super cool outfits. However, I can’t let these people continue acting this way towards Sam without calling them out. Why? Because it’s still spreading more hate that ends up extending beyond the internet into the real world.

Sam Smith has not only received this wave of hate on the internet, but they’ve gotten insulted (and I think even spat on) in public just for living their life authentically. It makes me so upset. These people need to be stopped and called out for their disgusting behavior.

Leave people alone for being who they are. They’re not hurting you. And if you feel hurt by just them existing, go touch some grass and figure yourself out, pal.

#lgbt #lgbt pride #trans enby #enby #nonbinary #non binary pride #sam smith #celebrity #singer #artist #trans artist #nonbinary rep #unpopular opinion #they them #transphobia #enby positivity #enby pride #nonbinary phobia #doing something unholy #unholy #i’m not here to make friends

[yippeecahier]

Tagged by @queerests !

I love talking about myself, so...

[art by @sugar-drift]

Here goes; much to everyone else's chagrin and my delight, this is a long post!

1. Are you named after anyone?

Yeah, my great-grandmother. Luckily it's a gender-neutral name so even though I'm trans, I kept it.

2. Last time you cried?

I was playing Dark Souls until midnight recently (last weekend iirc) fighting the Gaping Dragon and my partner was being sardonic in his jokes as usual but I was tired and started crying because I tilted and thought he was disparaging me/frustrated with me for dying to the boss so often with the constant "OK yeah, just...don't dodge!! Hahaha!!" and stuff. Luckily he apologized and helped me pull myself back together. I'm kind of a crybaby, to be honest.

3. Do you have/want kids?

I have no kids. I am really indecisive on the latter. My partner really wants kids, and would prefer to have a child with my genes; when he said he wanted a biological child I suggested surrogacy and sperm donation so that there would be humans with his genes and he was like, "no... I want them to have your genes..."

I don't dislike children at all considering I literally work with them in my career. I think they are delightful little people and it brings me joy to see how they grow and change. However, I also really like having boundaries in my life where I get undisturbed 8 hours of sleep every day and only interact with said children for 40 hours a week; I would have to give that up for 24/7 child duty if I became a parent. Also knowing myself and recommendations from my doctors, waking up every 2-3 hours to feed a baby would literally make me suicidal. In the words of my OB/GYN: "it's not a matter of if you get postpartum depression, given your mental health history, but when." Also where I currently live is extremely hostile to pregnant bodies and I would like very much not to risk death or jailtime and exorbitant fines/legal fees just to have a biological kid. 20% of all pregnancies result in miscarriage (especially early on, before the person knows they're pregnant) and I can be tried for a felony if literally anyone suspects or alleges it was an "abortion," and they get paid to do so. There is no medical difference or test to tell if pregnancy loss is one or the other. It's a whole thing.

At the same time, I work in a Title I school and I know and love many delightful foster children I would love to share my knowledge and resources with to improve their lives. The state is hostile to children, too, and those kids don't have a choice about living here the way adults do, since they're with the state department of children and family services. Our local DCFS is woefully in a perpetual crisis because they discriminate against queer and non-xtian households in fostering and adoption; the ratio of foster children to available homes is 40:1 here. I'm very passionate about this, and one way to put my money where my mouth is is to go into foster care. However, I would need my support network if I made that leap to parenthood and my family doesn't support fostering ("what if their trauma/issues are so bad it endangers you!!") and insists on biological children. Oh well.

TL;DR I'm on the fence regarding the future and if it includes children and in what form, but I know I definitely don't want any biological children right now. I've always thought about adopting or fostering an older child.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

No, I generally mean what I say. I have a hard time identifying sarcasm in others (thanks autism) so I generally avoid it. The only time it appears is in self-aggrandizing humor in lieu of self-deprecating humor (i.e., "I am the pinnacle of grace!" when I trip) to try to fix my mental health. Currently positive effects, I highly recommend.

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Hair and teeth. It's always been hair. I don't make eye contact if I don't know you very well but I generally look at people's heads to make it look like I am, and stare at mouths to lip-read a bit because of auditory processing issues. If you get a haircut or dye your hair, it takes me a bit to realize who you are, especially if it's a radical change (thanks autism for the prosopagnosia.) I scared my classmate in high school when I noticed that his two front teeth were pared down to be even with the others at the dentist. Apparently, no one else noticed? He freaked out when I asked him, "Hey why are your front two teeth shorter than they used to be?" I also respond to surprise significant hair changes in my loved ones...not that well. I got mad at my partner for shaving his head down to a buzzcut because it was such a drastic and sudden change, and was distressed to tears by my dad shaving the beard he'd had for 20 years.

6. What's your eye color?

Really deep chocolate brown. Not dark enough to be almost black, but much darker than any of the hazel hues my other family members have.

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

If it's not Jordan Peele, I'm going with happy endings. I'm really sensitive to gore, and vomited when watching the Aliens films.

(CW: Alien spoilers, death)

I liked the Alien franchise, but I puked in the popcorn when watching Prometheus during the improvised C-section to remove the alien in the protagonist's uterus scene and my brother was pissed. His friend helped me out of the movie theatre and rubbed my back while I couldn't stop shaking and puking and reassured me that he felt nauseated at that part too and personally wasn't mad at me for reacting like I did. I was crying about embarrassing myself in front of my brother and his friends. It brings tears to my eyes again to remember how gentle he was even though he was a teenage boy. He stopped talking to me after he became addicted to opiates, he was too embarrassed to tell me. He disappeared in the Russia-Ukraine war, presumed dead. He was a great person. Damn, crying again. Like I said, I'm a crybaby.

8. Special talents?

I'm told I'm a good cook. I failed o-chem once and withdrew the second time because I had a massive panic attack before my final exam, but at least I took away some skills from that. I use my knowledge of organic reactions and interactions between organic molecules to maximize flavors in coffee, curry, and other edible things I create.

I'm also told I'm a skilled 2-D artist. My mom saved this shoe I drew and shaded by smudging my pencil in 1st grade. The art teacher sent it home and told her I should go to art school. I even made a college art portfolio and took commissions for a bit, but when it came to having to do art for a grade or for money, it felt like my creativity and desire to create would just shut off under the pressure. I just do art as a hobby, now.

9. Where were you born?

In a hospital via emergency C-section in the middle of a thunderstorm like a badass.

10. What are your hobbies?

Drawing, embroidery, puzzles, reading non-fiction, tabletop and video games.

11. Have any pets?

Two little papillon dogs. One is a teenage boy, the other is an elderly lady.

12. What sports do you play or have you played?

Currently, I run. I recently got 2nd place in my age group in a 5k race this past fall. In the past, I did track and field, tennis, swimming, and kickboxing. I tried my hand at yoga and HEMA, but didn't stick with it. I got kicked out of ballet and basketball as a kid for being ADHD and autistic which made me awful at following directions and being a "team player," respectively; it's also why all my sports listed above are individual. 😅

13. How tall are you?

5' 6" when I don't slouch; I'm working on it!! I'm a short king.

14. Favorite subject in school?

It's a tie between science and art. If you read my other paragraphs, this seems obvious in retrospect.

15. Dream job?

I'm in it: dyslexia and reading interventionist! I do what I love (learning about the brain and how people learn and process things!!) and teach people how to do what I love (reading!! also learning about the brain!!) and it gives me meaning to serve others but still actually make good money above the average for people in my area with my degree and education.

No pressure tags 🩶 @deerstar4 @thatsoup @waflfurs @lemon--berry @woodrider @arthallea @pandatlas @jesterpup @litho-sphere

#yip speaks #yip contributes #art i like #other people’s art #furry #furry art #art for me #reblog bait #tag game

[cyro-starfire]

Meet Jiyu.Exe

This exe is a confident gay, trans man who's not afraid to show people that he doesn't give a dog's shit about what other people think of him. They laugh at the idea that people take Sonic.Exe too seriously and that most of them weren't even there to see the fact that the original story was so bad to where it was considered a trollpasta. They live off of people who complain about LGBTQ or cute exes, they will cackle in your face if you use your religion as an excuse to hate on gay people. They use He/They/It/Exe pronouns and everytime you complain about their pronouns, they add 5 more. (Shoutout to whoever can identify this reference :])

He used to be an exe that was strict to the original formula of the .Exe story, doing what others think an exe should be. However, a slight breach in code had led them to learn that they were following a script that dictated what their story should be, this led it to contemplate it's choices. Did exe really wanna be a boring exe that followed a script JUST to make other people happy? Was he really happy just repeating this cycle of killing and torturing? No... They didn't want to follow this dumb script that forced him to be a certain way, exe didn't want to please the crowd, they wanted to do its own thing, be his own person, do what exe wanted, with great power, they broke the chains that held them down and are now free as a bird. No longer were they held down by some stupid formula that's considered to be a joke by others, no longer did they do what some dumb 14 year olds wanted, that THEY considered was scary. Fuck what other people think, this is his life, and exe can do whatever they damn please. That's the way it should always be. Their goal in life now is to help others see that dictating others only makes them miserable, they should be free to create whatever they fucking want, as long as no harmful message is being spread through them.

#art #tw sonic.exe #sonic.exe #sonic exe #exe oc #sonic.exe oc #sonic exe oc #jiyu #jiyu.exe #ref #reference

[hadenclairee]

Hot Take:  No two words have done more damage to the trans community than “identify as”

I don’t identify as jack shit.  I am literally transitioning from male to female.  I have never once had a conversation with anyone where I said the words “identify as”.  In fact, quite the opposite - I’m content to let people identify me however they want while I’m in this weird in-between state between male and female.  As I pass more (and become more female), I do get a bit antsier to get to the finish line and be done with maleness, but that brings me back to my point:  that I am literally changing from male to female, I am literally becoming a woman.

I’ve spent some time in the past year reading memoirs and biographies of trans women from before the 2000s.  Something that jumped out at me in one of them was when Christine Jorgensen talked about some of the things that she was called - the most prominent insult she recieved was when she was called a “female impersonator”.  This was after her transition, after her bottom surgery.  She’d fully transitioned from male to female, and was basically being called a Drag Queen - but in the 1950s, the popular parlance for Drag Queens was “female impersonator”, a much more on-the-nose descriptor for people who put on a different gender as a costume.  That wasn’t Christine, though.  And it’s not us either.

For a good while, that seems to be the norm - trans people transitioning and demanding respect not as someone who “identifies as” but as someone who had underwent an arduous journey to change their sex.  The only people using language to paint them as pretenders were ardent transphobes, religious or TERFy types who denied the possibility of transition categorically.  

But in the early 2010s, a whole generation of LGBT allies came into being, who learned about trans people from the coming-out of Caitlyn Jenner or the bathroom bill debates spurred by North Carolina’s 2016 bill.  And unfortunately, “identify as” became a popular phrase in the mouth of allies defending our right to use public restrooms.  And it has persisted, and with each “Oh, they identify as...” uttered by a well-meaning ally, you can hear the  implied “but they aren’t actually...” or “just go along with it” buried behind their words.  Is there a term for a dog-whistle that’s used by well-meaning people, for what they believe is a good purpose, with misunderstandings laced right into it?  Because “identify as” is one of them.  

And at the same time, the right saw this weak point.  The right knew exactly what “identify as” implied, they heard the 35,000 Hz whistling underlying that phrase and 2016 social media were filled with the kinds of meme that they still fall back to today (the One Joke that all transphobes know), the Attack Helicopter meme.

So now, in 2023, when you’re finally out and have been on HRT for over a year, and are finally getting your letters for surgery and getting your legal documentation changed over, you might still overhear a coworker saying “he identifies as a woman now, so avoid saying ‘sir’ to him and try to use gender-neutral stuff”  

I don’t really have a good conclusion for this hot take.  I don’t know how to undo the damage.  Maybe just educate your allies as best you can, avoid using the wishy-washy “identify as” language yourself, and make it clear that you are literally transitioning from male to female (or female to male).  Overshare about your medical transition, if necessary, because I think the vast majority of cis people have no fucking clue what medical transition actually entails (but also, of course, you don’t owe anyone that kind of info, so that one’s optional... I just think it would help people understand but you don’t have to be the messenger for this one if you don’t want to be!) 

#disclaimer i understand people might think this is enbyphobic or transmed but i also recognize that nobinary people are actually nonbinary #and that they aren't just identifying as that #and i also know that not everyone can medically transition and god bless them because i know thats a struggle and a half #transgender #trans discourse #mtf #nuance

[baladesilver]

Sometimes I still think about the whole Nezha thing in Warframe chat and how fucking awfully handled it was.

Like, sure, I understand how "trap" is a derogatory term to trans people. I am a victim of it as much as any other trans person, especially us transfems. You don't have to lecture me on that.

However, in that case in specific, just letting it go would be the best course of action by far. I understand it happened at the same time as that shitshow with chat moderation, but DE don't seem to have learned anything at all from that whole situation.

For starters, Nezha isn't trans. Nor is he trans coded. Nor is he anything related to trans people or trans culture at all. He's just a twink frame with everything you may want from a twink, down to the Hatsune Miku cosplay, and I'm not even joking on that one. Calling that thing a trap is like calling F1nnst3r a trap, if he was a video game character that doesn't actually exist.

Even as a character, Nezha portrays no characteristic of being trans, other than not conforming to the strict expectations of his assigned gender, which isn't even a trans thing, just a queer thing at best, if you really want to count it. In lore, he's just CPS if CPS killed child abusers on sight.

Honestly, the kind of demographic that I see calling him a trap first is exactly queer people. I understand if a moderator saw that back when it started to be a thing and started banning it on sight as a knee jerk reaction, and I won't judge it if it was you. It's a perfectly fine application of paranoid reading from a very oppressed group and I might have done the same if I lacked the foresight I have now. That moderator had no blame on the shitstorm that was about to come down.

The way Digital Extremes handled the situation afterwards, however, was very bad. After the bans began, it was a common troll to tell someone to say the four words on chat and watch as they go away for upwards of an entire month. It got to a point (in which we still are today), where the automod will ban you if you merely link [Nezha] and [Kinetic Syphon Trap] items in chat in the same message.

I want to make it clear again, that I am not criticizing the initial moment of the situation, but the company's follow up and lack of understanding of trans peoples' identities and expressions. Denying someone who calls themselves a trap or a trannie only leads to infighting and is a net loss for everyone but transphobes. If you say someone else can't be called a trap, what you're truly saying is that identifying oneself as a trap is invalid and can't be done. I wouldn't want to be called a trap, but if you do, I cannot say you can't be. You cannot deny my identity, just as much as I cannot deny yours, be that directly or through a fictional character.

Nezha, with his fictional character status, can't state his opinion in either way, so just saying "Nezha is a trap" is a very gray statement by itself. Without context, it means absolutely nothing, and doesn't warrant the vehemence in which it is punished by moderation. If this situation was well handled from the beginning, it wouldn't be even remembered as an incident, let alone have its own name and meme status. By lacking an understanding of what it means to be queer, they inadvertently denied a lot of people of their identities. Oopsie daisy.

I understand that, as individuals, Digital Extremes' employees do support trans rights and identities. Some of them are trans themselves, they create trans characters and portray queerness in very beautiful and meaningful ways. However, as a company, DE has a lot of growing to do if they truly want to support the LGBT++ and its community in general. Ever since its creation, Warframe is a game governed by whoever speaks the loudest, from serious issues like this one down to balance patches and the like. I wish transparency and communication were more important to their business model, but I am not working there and don't know their conditions, I can only say that as a queer player, not as a developer or employee.

Anyways, thank you for coming to my ted talk turned rant. Enjoy the post-pride, everyone, and always remember that no one can deny you of your identity and expression, unless they directly harm another endangered group or evokes the tolerance paradox. Please have a nice day.

Also, please warn me if I need to put any content warnings on this post, I'm fairly new to post-exodus Tumblr.

#warframe #trans #trans rights #rant post