#I can’t stand him. I need him to be my wife stat

[gortrash]

Who the fuck told Astarion he was allowed to have the biggest wettest most pathetic looking doe eyes in existence

#I can’t stand him. I need him to be my wife stat #don’t look at me like that bro. I’m falling madly in love bro I’m dead serious bro. #astarion #bg3 astarion #bg3 #baldur’s gate 3

[clearlydiamondz]

Loyal to Royalty

Erik!Stevens X OC

Part Two 

- - - - - - - - - -

Princess Imani was the black sheep of her family, never really fitting the female royal type. When an arrange marriage between Prince   N'Jadaka and her is set up, she tries her hardest to get away... but she just can’t.

- - - - - - - - - -

“She has a faint pulse, we need to hurry up and get her to a crash cart. Stat!” Okoye yelled as they carried Imani through the halls. They placed her on the medical table, ripping off her shirt as Shuri grabbed the things she needed. 

“What happened?”

“The helicopter that they were on were attacked by smugglers. They found her in the mess.” Ayo said as Shuri and the medical team started to bag her.

“How the hell is she still alive!?” Shuri asked as T’Challa ran in with Nakia. Nakia was already in her medical gear. 

“Everyone that does not need to be here, out!” she yelled getting close to Imani. Everyone left the room, as T’Challa watched through the glass worried. He chewed on his thumb as they attempted to bring her pulse back to a strong rate. After 15 minutes, it was getting worse. 

“Challa, she’s trying to fight it but it’s not working.” Shuri told him as he thought about it. “Not even the-”

“Nope. We might have to use the herb.” she whispered to him. “Nakia suggested it, she’s not going to make it.” she begged him. He thought long and hard before nodding. 

“I’ll get it. They won’t suspect anything if I’m in there.” he stood up walking out of the lab. 

- - - - - - - - - -

A couple of days later, Imani was invited to the country of Wakanda. Over the last couple of days Erik and her has been communicating over the plans over the marriage. Nothing to much. 

Imani sat in the common area preparing for her trip.. Her step mother came in seeing what she was doing, seeing her packing a backpack for her things. “Hm, so now you’re on board with marrying Prince N’Jadaka?” she asked standing over her. She looked up at her fathers wife, before squinting her eyes. 

“Nope. Still not. But what choice do I have to protect my people.” she said zipping up the bag and standing up. 

“I just don’t understand what that family and your father see’s in you. You have them all fooled but I’ll be damned if you get us.” Oshana snapped. Imani faked pouted at her before saying, 

“Well considering that the Wakanda royal family has been in my life since I was like... 4 months old, I’ve created a very special bond with those lovely people.” she said matter of factly. “Besides, my father wouldn’t trust your precious daughter to run a bakery sale, Nevermind a a country.” she shrugged her shoulders before stepping aside to grab everything else she needed. 

“My daughter is more prepared to be a Queen than you will ever be. You’re disrespectful and a nuance to this entire family.” she snapped at her. Imani laughed, she couldn’t help but laugh. That is one thing that Oshana and Amara hated about Imani. Normal people would be upset with the pestering but she found it hilarious. Funny even. Whatever they did or say, she never really let them effect her. Of course there were times where she would snap when they over stepped, but any other times she would just laugh. 

“Okay..” she trailed off. She turned around and looked at her. “It’s kind of pitiful how quick you are willing to throw your one and only daughter out to a man that neither of you guys know. I can sort of understand why my father is doing it but what does it for you?” she asked them seriously. All she did was stare at her, because the both of them knew exactly why. 

It was about power. Money. More fame. 

“The fact that my daughter is grateful to be in such a blessed position is more than what you could ever do.” she whispered to her, Imani winced. 

“See that’s where I disagree.” Imani whispered back. “But, I’m going to let you decide on what I’m talking about.” she said throwing the bag over her shoulders. She didn’t move as she stared at Oshana in the face. 

“I just don’t understand what my father see’s in you.” she mocked her, Oshana’s face growing with rage as she heard Imani speak. “My mother was a lady with such high values and such a beautiful spirit. Your a disappointment to what the queen was. You’re whole existence in my father’s life is like venom to blood.” 

The anger that dripped from her voice was scary enough to make Oshana not say anything else. Before she stepped out of the common area, she turned back and looked at her. 

“My father may be dumb, but I’m not.”

- - - - - - - - - -

“Imani, welcome back to Wakanda.” Okoye said with a smile as the two of them hugged each other. 

“I will never get used to that grand entrance.” Imani told her looking around. “Such a beautiful home that you guys have.” she said as Okoye chuckled. 

“Well this will be also be your home. Shuri told me to escort you to the lab. I’m guessing for the new upgrades..” she trailed off, whispering the last part. Imani nodded following the Dora Milaje guards to the lab. 

“That. And to talk to Erik.” she said. Okoye sighed before looking at her while they walked. 

“I tried to convince the board that it-” Imani cut her off. 

“I’ve heard that so many times.” she chuckled. “I’ve done it on my side. T’Challa, Shuri, You, Erik. No use.” she sadly stated. Okoye grabbed her shoulder squeezing it. 

“Well at least you get to come here more often.” she said trying to lighten the mood. The attempt to make her feel better actually did make her feel a tad bit. Wakanda was such a beautiful place. She remembered as a child she would dream and wish that her country was just like Wakanda. Coming here as a child was her favorite place to go to. More than all the beaches, more than any amusement park, more than any country in the world. 

“Honestly, that is an upside.” she said to her laughing. They entered the lab seeing two mannequins with the suit. But neither one of them were hers. She noticed it belonged to the Black Panther and the Golden Jaguar. 

“Imani!” she turned around and saw Shuri running towards her. She ran into her arms as Imani laughed hugging her back. “I’ve missed you!” she exclaimed. Imani looked at her a bit confused. 

“You saw me a week ago. When I dropped the suit off?” she asked her as Shuri shrugged grabbing her tablet. 

“Okay? And the sky is blue.” she said. Imani giggled at the little come back. If there was anyone who could out match Imani in the ‘smart mouth’ department was Shuri. 

“Any ways, we need to wait till T’Challa and Erik gets-”  The two of them walked into the lab together talking about something. Erik stopped in his tracks seeing Imani sitting on one of the stools. The two of them looked at each other before she gave him a nod acknowledging he was there. She stole a quick glimpse of him, seeing what he had on. He wore a plain white shirt, with a pair of grey sweat shorts with a some white Airforce Ones. T’Challa was dressed in traditional casual Wakanda wear. 

It was nice to see that he bought his style from the states over here. One thing that she was obsessed with was some of the fashion that America had to offer. Some of it was though was.. questionable. 

“Hello.” she said waving at the two of them. Erik looked her up and down drinking her in. She wore a red flowy dress with a white jean jacket, with white sandals with wedges. Her dreads were in a high bun on the top of her head. “What is she doing here?” Erik asked sitting across from her making her roll her eyes. 

“You’re gonna see in a second.” T’Challa said hugging Imani. Imani turned around from the lab table, looking at Shuri who was about to present. 

“So as you all know I did some modifications to your suits. For some odd reason Jadaka, when you absorbed all of the kinetic energy, all of it wasn’t being released. Most of it being kept inside the suit. So I made some upgrades so it didn’t get overheated, in a cooling system.” she told him. He stood up touching the suit admiring the gold trimmings. 

“I also added to all three suits sound absorbing shoes. So when you are trying to be sneaky, no one hears you.” she said. Erik was the only one that noticed that she say the number three. 

“Three? You have another suit?” he asked her. Shuri looked at Imani before she nodded for her to continue. Shuri clicked the button for the suits storage is the silver and black suit came to view. It just wasn’t an upgrade, it was an entirely new suit. 

“Holy shit..” Imani whispered standing up touching it, looking at Shuri. “You did all this?” she asked. Shuri nodded smiling, she was so proud of herself. Erik looked at the two of them before shaking her head, 

“Wait no. No. She is not getting a suit.” Erik stood up. That made Imani turn around and squint her eyes at him. 

“Why not? I already had one.” she shrugged her shoulders in a matter of fact tone. 

“What do you mean you already have one?” Everyone looked at each other before she sighed, 

“I’m the Silver Leopard.” she confessed to him as he stared at her. After a few seconds he burst out laughing. 

“Okay.. that was a great joke. Now forreal. What’s with the suit?” he asked Shuri as she looked around the room at everyone. 

“I’m not joking.” she stated, him staring at her in complete shock. His mouth was slightly open as his eyes squinted in shock in confusion. 

“H-How?” he asked. 

“It’s not important.” she turned around admiring the suit, that statement making him scoff. 

“The fuck kinda- no it is important. If I’m marrying you it’s my job to make sure you’re safe.” he snapped at her. She pointed at Shuri before saying,

“I am safe. She keeps me safe. Just like she keeps the two of you safe.” she told him. Erik stared at her before looking at everyone. 

“Give us a minute.” Everyone respected his wishes as they gave the two time to talk. “So you didn’t think it would be important for you to tell me?’ he asked her. 

“I didn’t think it was important. I have other things that are more important that the Silver Leopard. Like being forced to marry you.” she snapped at him. His head fell back as his eyes closed as he let out a sarcastic laugh. 

“Oh my gosh! Can you stop thinking about the being force to marry shit!? You can run away if it’s that much of an issue for you!”

“And leave my country behind?”

“Okay then! So you don’t have to say every five fucking minutes that you’re being forced to fucking marry me. Do you think I wanna marry you? No, I’m being forced just as much as you are. I have to do it because I know in the long run it’ll help people. Just like you. So just accept it if there’s nothing you can do..” he was fed up with her, almost to the point of being annoyed. 

“If we are going to be doing this, this is the type of shit that you need to tell me. Got it?” he told her. She was speechless from his outburst. He snapped his fingers in front of her before snapping her out of the little trance he had her in. “Hello?” he bought her back to reality as she slowly nodded her head. 

“Yeah.”  He sat down on the stool that she was previously sitting on. “So, explain.” he told her. She stared at him before saying, 

“The night our helicopter crashed, they bought me to Wakanda because the hospital was closest. The only way for them to keep me alive was to have the Heart Shape Herb in my system.” she told him. He had so many questions about what she just said, he didn’t even know where to start. 

“So after they gave it, they couldn’t extract it?” he asked. She shook her head, playing with her fingers. 

“No, at the time I would start coding once they extracted it. So T’Challa made the decision to just let me have it so I could stay alive.” she said looking back at him. “No one knows about it though. T’Challa didn’t want the councilors here and my father finding out about it. I don’t want him to know that I’m the Silver Leopard, it’ll just make things worse.” she groaned rubbing her temples. 

“How?” he chuckled standing up. “Your father, your step mother and your step sister damn near worshiped us because of who we are. I’m sure-”

“Erik please. You do not know them like I know them. The only reason they worship you is because you two are men, who are high in a monarchy, who just so happened to be rich. It’s seen as powerful on you but for me, it’s seen as someone who won’t take the thrown seriously. I’m a female royal, we’re suppose to sit behind the men and look pretty.” she explained to him. 

“I don’t want anyone else to find out about this, understand?” she told him. He was silent before she spoke again. “Erik, do you understand?” she said a tad bit louder. 

“Yeah..” she gave him one last look before walking to the hall to get the rest. Erik just stared at her suit. Shock wasn’t even the word to explains how he felt. They came back in, Imani sitting across from him on the table, giving him a look. 

“Okay.. back on subject.” 

- - - - - - - - - -

After their little meeting, T’Challa grabbed Imani and Erik to talk. “You guys good?” he asked her. 

“Yes. What did you want to talk about?” she asked him, trying to change the subject. T’Challa looked at Erik before he nodded his head sighing him to continue on with what he had to say. 

“So, Okoye gave me intel about how there is vibranium being trafficked through the dark market being sold at an auction Friday night. I need all hands on this one. This place is going to be surrounded in heavy duty weaponry.” he told them. 

“That gives us only two days to prepare.” she whispered, her mind immediately racing on what she needed to do to prepare. “Can you send me all of the information for it so I can go over it.” she told him. 

“Just stay here for the next couple of days. It’ll give us time to debrief and come up with a plan, and no one would think anything of it considering that you two are going to be.. y’know.” he said, not trying to make it awkward. 

“I guess. I don’t have to worry about smuggling the suit across the boarders.” she shrugged her shoulders. “I just need to grab some clothes and some extra things I need to stay.” she said pulling out her phone to contact her barricade but Erik stopped her. 

“Don’t worry. We can just use one of the jets. They are programmed so that we don’t have to stop at the boarders.” Erik said. She looked at him a little shocked by the gesture before she looked at T’Challa. 

“We’ll be back, once we are we can discuss it.” she told him, he nodded. 

“Be safe you two.” he left back into the corroders then looked back at him. 

“I’m ready when you are.” 

They sat in the jet, looking at the sunset that sat upon the Wakanda horizon. It was silent, it was awkward. She didn’t know what to say, she just assumed that there was nothing to say to him. That was until he spoke up, 

“I’m sorry for snapping on you earlier.” he told her. She looked up from her phone before nodding. 

“You’re good.” she said looking back at her phone. He stared at her again before saying, 

“Well we have another 20 minutes before we get to yours so why don’t we attempt to get to know each other.” he suggested turning to look at her. “Its only percussions, just in case someone asks us about us.” he defended himself. She thought about it before saying, 

“Sure why not.” she shrugged before locking her phone and throwing it on the dash board. He looked a tad bit shocked that she agreed but he didn’t let his fascial expressions show it. “Ask way N’Jadaka.” 

The way she said his name, had him feelings some kind of way. He felt that in his soul, only wanting to hear her say it again.. and again... and again. 

“Okay... favorite color?” she gave a ‘are you serious’ look, but he shrugged. “It’s good to know...” he trailed off. 

“It’s purple.” she told him. “That is what color I wanted inspired by my suit but we all know who took that.” she said rolling her eyes as he chuckled. “But he makes it look alright so I guess.” 

“Yeah... he does look okay in purple.” he said before shaking her head. “Mine is gold.” 

“Gold isn’t a color...”

“Yes it is.” 

“No it’s not. It’s a metal.” she said. “That’s like saying, ooh my favorite color is bananas just because it’s yellow. The accurate color of gold is yellow with a metallic touch.” she argued as he rolled his eyes. 

“Okay... so the color gold is a yellow with a metallic touch. Just like the color baby blue is mixed with white.” he said in general as she looked at him. 

“Okay... so what two colors make gold then?” she asked him. 

“Brown and Yellow.” he looked at her as her eyes was squinted. “Don’t believe me? Search it up.” he laughed before she rolled her eyes playfully, slouching in her seat. “Hmm. exactly.” he said knowing that she proved him wrong. 

“Anyways.. your turn.” he said laughing. She thought of a question before saying, 

“What is something that your afraid of?” He scoffed at the question, thinking that there was nothing he was scared of. 

“Nothing.” she looked at him before rolling her eyes. 

“Okay tough guy, everyone is scared of something.” she said as he chuckled. 

“Not me.” she smirked before saying, 

“So your not scared of getting an uncurbable disease. Or a loved one dying. Or being snapped out of existence?” she asked. 

“Okay but that’s not the same.” 

“It literally is the same. Everyone is scared of something, that doesn't mean nothing.” she mentioned. The two of them continued to argue about it as the jet entered the castles air wing. 

She stood up as the plane landed before stretching. “Okay, I’m going to run in and grab everything that I need. I’ll be right out. I should be back in less than 10 minutes.” she told him typing in the entry pad code to open the side door. 

“Why don’t I just come inside?” he asked her standing up. She turned around looking at him. 

“That’s not a good idea. So just stay here.” she said stepping down the ramp. He stared at from behind before rolling his eyes. 

She walked into the galley way, attempting to make her presence unknown but they were having dinner in the dining hall. Her father caught her figure trying to sneak pass the humongous arch way. 

“Imani, how was Wakanda? I hope you acted accordingly!” he yelled behind her. She stopped closing her eyes before turning around. She stood in the arch way to see the three of them having dinner. 

“No. I ran through the streets of Wakanda naked while singing America’s national anthem.” she said sarcastically. Her step-mother scoffed at her words before looking at her father, 

“And you expect her to rule this country. Such pity.” she said. With a quick thought and faster way with her tongue she spat out, 

“And tell me, what have you done to benefit this country?” she asked crossing her arms over her shoulder. Before she could answer she was cut off by Imani, “I’ve done more for this country as Princess than you have and ever will as queen.” she said, like venom dripping from her words. 

“Don’t talk to my mother like that.” Amarah said standing up. All Imani could do was role her eyes. 

“Well I would not have to talk to her like this if she knows when and when not to keep her lips touching.” she snapped back. 

“That’s enough!” Her father snapped. “Imani, don’t speak to her that way.” he looked at her, as her step-mother smirked at her. But the smirk was quickly wiped away when he looked at her and said, “Don’t antagonize her. I would think you would know by now that she will say anything that she pleases. Don’t forget she’s my daughter.” he warned her. She cleared her throat looking down at her plate. 

“Sit down. Eat. Tell me about your time in Wakanda.” 

“Actually I can’t. T’Challa has invited me to stay at the palace so that Erik and I can get to know each other better.” she lied. Amarah’s face lit up at the name of Erik. 

“Oh that’s good! See, I told you this wouldn’t be bad.” Her father said. She couldn’t help but mentally gag at those words. 

“Hm it does sound delightful. Amarah, go upstairs and pack a bag. You should tag along to expand your resources.” her mother instructed her. She stood up happily from her seat but Imani stopped. 

“No! She cannot come!” she said as the three of them stared. 

“And why is that?” Amarah asked with a raised of her eyebrow. “It seems like you feel threatened by my presence.” she smirked. 

“Actually no.” Erik came from behind the wall as her smirked turned to complete shock. 

“Prince N’Jadaka. Oh my goodness, you’re here.” she said caught by surprised. Oshana stood up and so did her father. 

“Did she have you wait outside? That is unacceptable. What must go through your mind to have him wait on your time and-”

“Actually no, once again. I was making a call.” he lied. Imani looked back at him squinting her eyes at him before he spoke up again. “Her being threatened by your presence have nothing to do with it.”

“Oh I didn’t mean it like-”

“She cannot come King Z’Kiri but maybe another time. The palace will be empty with just me and her with T’Challa going out for some business, and my Aunt won’t be in the palace until next week.” he cuts her off by crossing his arms over his chest. “We decided that we just wanted to use this time to get to know each other better and discuss plans for what we have for the countries.” he finished. 

“Is this correct?” her father looked at her. She nodded her head in agreement. 

“Yes. She would just be alone.” she responded. The look on Amarah’s face was seething with pure anger and jealousy. It was kind of soothing and funny that Erik stood up for her. 

“Well, there will be another time when we all meet in Wakanda. And plus it is important that they create some bond and focus on what the two countries needs.” he said. Relief went through out her entire body as she looked at her with a smirk. 

“Well I need to go grab my things that I need for the the next few nights.” she turned around walking up the stairs leaving Erik behind. 

“That’s funny that’s she finally on board with this arranged marriage. All the crap that she was talking about the arrangements. About you.” her step mother replied picking up some of her salad with her fork. 

“Oshana.” Her father warned her but all Erik did was shrug. 

“To be fair, I don’t blame her. I’m not at all jumping with joy with being forced to marry someone that I don’t know, have no feelings for and have no type of love. And I’m sure she feels that way.. twenty times more.” he said leaning against on of the pillars that was in the dining hall. 

“Well in this life we have the make sacrifices' in the life time to protect the ones we love, And one thing for certain she loves the people of this country very much.” her father said as he chuckled. 

“Oh trust me. One of the many features that I do like about her.” he said. It was nothing but the truth. The way that she spoke about her country and it’s people, there was nothing that she wouldn’t do to protect them. 

“That’s funny that you say that. Amarah here is going out tomorrow to the streets to volunteer for the children center.” she said with a smug smile. 

“Yeah. Imani was suppose to come to help out but I guess it wasn’t that important to her.” Amarah said shaking her head in fake disappointment. Erik wasn’t stupid. He knew what they were doing. So he decided to step in. 

“Is that so? So how many times have you done it?”

“Oh, this will be first time. I thought it was important that the kids understand that there are people in royalty who understands them.” she said as Erik nodded. 

“And how long  have you been here?” he asked.

“Oh I’ve been here for about-”

“That doesn’t matter.” her Oshana said cutting her off before she could answer. 

“I mean, if you’re going to say that Imani doesn't find these kids important because she decided to skip one meeting in which she has gone ever since she was 18, that’s kind of a stretch don’t you think. Especially because you’ve been here for years.”  he said in a matter of fact tone. The dinner table went quiet, Oshana trying to find out a way to defend her daughter. Imani came down at the right time before anything else could be said. 

“Okay well we will be heading out now.” she said with her duffle bag over her shoulder. “By the way Amarah if your still down to come with me, Saturday is when I rescheduled to go with the kids. Just during the evening instead of in the morning.” she told him. Erik chuckled before shaking his head. 

“Oh.. I uh actually was going to go out with some of my friends.” she said awkwardly. 

“Oh... that’s more important than the kids?” Erik asked. Imani looked up at him in shock and confusion as her step mother gasped in disbelief. 

“Erik.” Imani said hitting his chest in shock. The last thing that she wanted was to have any argument or have them feel some type of way just for them to sit up and here argue. 

“Whatever let’s just head out.” he said standing up straight and walking out the hall. She saw the look on her step mother and step sister face, knowing that when she cam back there was going to be some shit.

- - - - - - - - - -

@life-in-the-slut-house @gloglamsparks @waveynaee @lalaooopsie @luvvvjada @nccu-rnc @prettyisasprettydoes1306 @leahnicole1219 @meeksmillsfrenchfries @hinatasfleshlight @kokokonako @junie04 @sourbabynaee  @sociallyawkward18 @raysunshine78 @justgetitoverwith0 @lishabaybeee-blog@rbhp @ladymac82 @musicismeb @keviekevswife1 @chaneajoyyy @youlovechicky @sexicherri3 @amirra88 @jameica17695 @lishabaybee @softleoblue @automaticdragonmugalien @lynaye1993 @etherealluvrr @xsweetdellzx​

#Erik Killmonger #erik stevens #erik kilmonger x reader #erik stevens x reader #t'challa #black panther #waanda #erik stevens imagines

[aky-chaosgremlin]

I originally wrote this as a twitter thread, and I wanted to back it up here so I can rewrite it soon! hehe

Lan zhan (10) watches his Huan-ge (16) playing Sims 4. His two characters, Xichen and Mingjue, are in love! They kiss wiggle around in bed a little. The day Xichen is pregnant! That is how lz learns that kisses make babies.The next day at school wei ying kisses his cheek. 

Lz goes home bawling.

lz: im sorry uncle, a-zhan has shamed our family name 😭 you have raised a *whore*

lz, packing his bags, recalling uncle telling ge-ge off for sleeping around: uncle will throw me out, i KNOW it. 

lz will make wy take responsibility and raise the baby 😤 

Uncle: a-zhan you are not pregnant

lz: UNCLE IS REFUSING TO ACKNOWLEDGE MY BABY 

Lwj decides that he’s going to run away. He grabs his bag with all the essentials— tuzi, an extra pair of shorts, a water bottle and a granola bar— and runs down the street to wei yings house, still sniffling. 

Cangse ayi takes one look at him and sends him to play in the yard 

Lz drops his bag and runs outside, careful not to trip bc falling would hurt the baby. 

wy has somehow climbed on top of the playhouse and is roaring and banging on the roof. "all you puny humans will die! mwahahahaha!”

lz can’t believe wy is the dad, this baby will be a mess! 

wy sees lz standing at the base of the play structure and nearly topples over in his excitement.

wy: lz! come up here and help me destroy the humans!

lz: i cannot wy. the days of childhood are behind me now. 

wy: 😲 what?! lan zhaan nooo

lz: wy please come down. we must talk. 

wy scrambles down and they settle on the swingset for their talk.

lz: wei yang. i am pregnant

wy: 😲

lz: and you are the father

wy: *gasp* LAN ZHAN! 

lz really hopes wy won’t hate him now. His worries are eased when wy shouts, “dont worry lan zhan! am here!” 

lz is so relieved! He starts tearing up again.

lz: wei ying, I ran away from home. Uncle does not bless our union. he has shunned our baby!

wy, bless him, looks just as offended.

wy: your uncle is a meanie! It’s a good thing you ran away lz. I have a house for us right here! 

wy proposes to lz right then and there with a keyring he found in the sand, and promises they’d get married the very next day. 

“we need witnesses for a wedding lz. and if your uncle won’t help us then a-sang and a-cheng will help us at school! Our wedding will be the bestest!” 

wy works very hard to make his pregnant wife comfortable in their little house. He sneaks into his meimei’s room and steals her cooking utensils, and drags a beanbag from his own room to make lz a bed.

while wy works lz tells baby about its baba: "he’s a silly, but wy is good” 

a while later, cangse ayi comes out to offer them snacks. She calls up the boys in the play structure and all she can see is two heads popping out the window.

wy: hi mama! Welcome to our house! Lz is my wife and we’re having a baby! 

lz is very worried about what cangse ayi would say. Would wy’s family deny their baby too?

cssr: how lovely! you must be new to the neighbourhood. How nice to have such a young family next door. I brought you a welcome present.

she ruffles wy’s hair and tells them to have fun. 

lz is so relieved and so sad! how come his family won’t accept him 😭 uncle is so mean! perhaps a-huan would be more supportive. he will have to speak with him later.

later happens much sooner than expected when Uncle sends huan-ge to bring a-zhan back home… 

lh: a-zhan uncle said you ran away? what happened?

lz: gege, a-zhan is pregnant with wei sings baby and uncle won’t accept us 😭

lh: ...

lh: … 

lh: 😈

lh: oh my a-zhan how could this be?! what will you do now?! having a baby is so easy feat! 

lh: did you know you can never eat ice cream every again

lz: *sobbing*

lh: how did this even happy a-zhan?

lz: wei yimg kissed me

lh: oh no a kiss you say? its definitely twins. you’d better stat here a-zhan, uncle would never let this slide. 

lan huan going home that day: a-zhan refuses to come home! He looks like he’s run away for real… You must have hurt him deeply uncle what did you do?!

uncle:… w h a t? what did i do?!?! this boy 🙄 

Wy manages to calm lz down. “you can have all the ice cream after the baby is born lan zhan!” 

ice cream is lz's favouritest. How will he live without ice cream 😭

lz is calmer but still sniffling when jiang cheng climbs over the shared fence between his and wy’s yard to play 

jc, scoffing: why are you crying that’s so lame. You’re such a baby a-zhan

lz: *cries harder at mention of baby*

wy: HEY DONT BE MEAN TO MY WIFE DONT YOU KNOW HES PREGNANT AND HORMONAL

jc, whacking wy: you’re so stupid he’s not pregnant

wy: he is! he said so and lz never lies 

wy and jc proceed to tussle, getting covered in sand.

lz watching wy defend him: 🥺 maybe he will be a wonderful spouse after all!

yanli- jie eventually shows up and wrenches jc off of wy. Lz likes her very much for saving his husband. She’s much nicer than her dumb brother. 

when yanli hears of lan zhan’s predicament she fights down a smile and replies very seriously. “oh my a-zhan you’ve been through an ordeal indeed. Don’t worry, jiejie will support you. a-ying you must invite me to the baby shower okay?”

She leaves promising to bring presents… 

jyl secretly texting lh: your didi is so cute 🥰 and so very good at playing his role

lh, snickering to himself: indeed he is… will you help me set up a wedding for them? perhaps tonight?

jyl, delighted: of course! I will prepare the dolls! 

about an hour later, yanli and a-huan come back to wy’s yard.

wy has left his bride resting at home— he’s can’t exert himself, its bad for the baby!— and gone “out” with jc to “work” plucking dandelions

lz swooning on the beanbag like a maiden, waiting for wy’s return 

jyl: boys! come quick come quick its time to get married!

wy: but jiejie we’re getting married tomorrow!

lh: no time for that you must get married *now*

lz: gene but why?

lh: dont you know its illegal to have a baby without being married a-zhan? 

lz: 😰

lh: you must get married quickly or the cops will come take your babies away!

lz, panicking: my and wy’s babies 😖😭🥺

lz: but what about witnesses and uncle 

jyl: dont worry a-zhan! your uncle agreed to be there! So will all of our parents

lz: uncle approves? 

lan huan convinces him that of course, after cangse ayi explained convinced him, how could he not!

lh and jyl shepherd him into the jiang’s garden where a wedding is set up. The adults look eager and excited, and dolls making up the rest of the crowd. 

wy waits by the altar. 

Jyl hands him a little bouquet, and fixes a makeshift veil on his head and sends him marching down the aisle. jc plays a song on his guitar which people guess is an attempt at the wedding march— its much too out of tune to say for sure 

Lz is very nervous. He’s very lucky that he gets to marry his best friend at least. Imagine if it had to be that bully wx. yuck.

he looks to his uncle to confirm that he accepts and feels a weight lifted off of his shoulder when he nods. Phew. Uncle still loves him. 

The wedding begins. Jyl is their officiant and as she monologues about joining their souls together. Lh sits in the front row with his uncle and records everything.

They make their vows. Wy will make sure lz always has ice cream. Lz will never keep wy from climbing things. 

They exchange ring pops. 

And then jyl finally declares that it’s time for wy to kiss his bride.

The wedding that went off without a hitch so far starts to go completely wrong.

Wy leans in to kiss his fiancé, but lz pushes him away hard sending wy toppling to the ground. 

Their audience falls suddenly silent.

wy on the ground looks started, and peers up and lz in shock.

lz: will not kiss wei yimg. 

wy bursts into tears. 

wy: lan zhan wont kiss me! he doesnt love me!!

Wy is distraught. His tears devolve into big heaving gasps. 

Seeing wy cry makes lz starts crying again too.

He starts wailing: Nooooo a-zhan loves wei ying 😭😭

wy: then why won’t zhanzhan kiss me 😭 😭😭

lz: a-zhan doesn’t want to get pregnant again 😭 what if a-ying kisses me and the babies also get pregnant 😭😭😭😭 

The adults who were stunned into silence at the sudden breakdown finally spring into action. Well, most of them. 

Cangse ayi bursts into howling laughter. Wcz picks up wy and comforts him: “sometimes people just dont like being kissed a-ying. it doesn’t mean they dont love you” 

Lqr kneels with lz, completely mortified at the outbursts. Where on earth had he gotten such an idea in his head?!

He listens to lz’s rambles about how kisses would make him pregnant and huan-ge said that the FBI would arrest his babies. He’s sorry he’s a hussy and shamed shushu

Lqr was so going to punish lh when they get home. (Said culprit is quickly sobering up from his laughter when he catches lqr glaring at him)

lqr pulls lz into his lap and consoles him. He explains to lz that that’s not pregnancy works, turning red as he gives The Talk in public. 

meanwhile…

cssr: you little gremlin we talked about not kissing other people randomly what made you go and do that!?

wy, indignant: but mama! it wasn’t random! you said that we should show people that we love them with both words and actions and that’s why you kiss me! 

they get both boys calm eventually.

wy: im sorry for kissing you when you thought it would get you pregnant lz 🥺

lz: mn. I’m sorry for rejecting wy’s kiss. 🥺 I really love wy 🥺

wy: 😁 I LOVE U TOO LZ!

lz surprises wy by smacking a big kith on wy’s cheeks.

wy: eep 😳 

From then on the boys decide to kith each other on a daily basis. Their relationship evolves over the years from platonic baby kisses, to shy first kisses, to filthy making out. Without the looming threat of pregnancy scares they become extremely annoying with their PDA.

==FIN== 

If you made it this far: Thank you so much for followed along and supporting me along the way 🥺. This is the first thread that I’ve ever posted to completion. I didn’t expect it’d so much attention as it did; I am so grateful! Shout out @cwnsthicktighs for creating this with me 

Some extra scenes: In the original brainwork, the “wedding” happens the next day. Two things were meant to happen here: 1) lh goes homee after riling lz up, lqr tries to pick lz up himself. lqr: a-zhan, come home lz: no. wy is my family now wy, clueless: lz is family? YAY :D 

2. the next day at school wx tries to pick on lx bc he’s got a huge crush on him. lwj doesn’t like it one bit. wy, still protecting his pregnant wife, flies in to the rescue: "STAY AWAY FROM MY PREGNANT WIFE YOU HOMEWRECKER"

why does he know what a home wrecker is? 

Well, wcz is obsessed with soaps. Most days jfm also sneaks over to watch it with him, but he lives in fear of yzy finding out every day.

cssr writes down all of wcz’s favourite scenes so they can role-play them when wy is asleep 😉 

No one lets lz live this day down ever. They bring it up at every chance: “get pregnant lately lz?”

Years in the future, when wx get married, everyone brings The Pregnancy Incident during the toasts. Lz turns a brilliant red while wy falls out of his chair laughing. 

#wangxian #mdsz #babyji #babyxian #crack #fluff #the sims 4 #lans dont do sex ed #maybe they should #lan lichen is a gremlin

[crystalelemental]

Unit Teambuilding - Cheren

Cheren, most put upon in the world, has finally gotten his due, with an EX and full grid.  My wife stays winning this month.

General Overview I told my wife his grid was good, and I stand by it.  But in a completely objective sense, this isn't stellar.

Cheren buffs almost nothing.  He got Shielded 2, and Team Sharp Entry, that's it. It's not a great look.  Endurance is nice for tanking, and Crunch On a Roll 2 is great for defense drops.  Brain Brawn would be good, if it were reasonably achievable, but I imagine it's possible to adjust for it in a stage that's almost entirely special.  He's also able to heal. Admittedly, it's only 20%, but it's something in tandem with the gradual healing, you know?

The main issue that holds Cheren back is his gauge consumption.  2-3 bars as a support is a lot, and he doesn't buff speed nor have the best speed stat.  But this is a fascinating situation where his trainer move provides legitimate value, by restoring all gauges.  Shielded being attached also means it gets gauges, and +2 defense and gradual healing for the team.

I will not sit here and pretend like Cheren is all that great.  I dunked on Drake for similar effects.  But I feel like Cheren's grid layout is much more accessible for things he wants, and the added healing being accessible is a selling point, so I do rank him above that.  He's solidly fine.  And...incredibly hard to teambuild for because of his complete lack of buffing.

Move Level and EX? So, as has been discussed for ages, Cheren's base kit is bad.  He needs his 3/5 grid to function.  Unlike many of the story units that got access to decent stuff 1/5, like Aggravation on Acerola, but not Cheren.  EX also feels pretty necessary.  Cheren's not a great tank, but given the lack of buffing, stats are a hugely important factor for keeping him alive, and added HP is particularly useful with gradual healing as a focus.  Added in, he's a support.  Double sync buff is tremendous and valuable.  So definitely useful for EX, if you're going for long Gauntlet runs, or just want him as an F2P option.  Otherwise, admittedly, Cheren's not really great enough to justify the resource expense.

Team 1: Cheren, Noland, Ramos Cheren cannot be broadly applied; much of his role is specific.  In this case, anti-Azelf.  Cheren's defense buffing is great insurance against Azelf's sync, while his lack of buffing doesn't both a self-sufficient offensive unit like Noland.  Add in that later in a match he can run Crunch On a Roll to debuff, and he's a decent support partner.   Just...bring a sleep user.

Team 2: Cheren, Lodge Rosa, Masked Royal This is a neat one.  Lodge Rosa packs Vigilance, meaning she makes exceptionally good use of Cheren's Shielded buffs.  She's pretty offensively self-sufficient, and the team emphasizes great physical bulk and defense drops. Lodge Rosa means a good answer to Entei as well, which Cheren appreciates thanks to Full Heal removing the guaranteed burns.

Team 3: Cheren, SC Rosa, Support Tauros Cheren against Cresselia is a legitimately funny pick.  SC Rosa in particular has such a strong matchup that she's nigh-guaranteed to win with enough support, and here is that support.  Tauros can buff speed for the team, allowing Rosa to spam her high-gauge moves.  Cheren's Full Heal allows him to remove status from his allies, but keep himself paralyzed to avoid Go Viral Toxic later in the fight.  I haven't tested, but I imagine this works comparably against Latias.

Final Thoughts Cheren's fine.  Again, I can't sing his praises by any means, but he's solidly fine. There are options.  I feel like maybe I'm celebrating mediocrity a bit, but this is at least workable.

If you put in the candy.  Yeah, Cheren's a story unit who needs support candy. Good luck with that shit.

#pokemon masters #unit teambuilding #cheren

[just-my-fandom]

Flashes (Jack Gibson x Reader)

Summary; After almost losing his wife and child to a house fire, Jack finds himself having flashbacks when he’s on a rescue for another woman and baby, later that night unable to sleep due to the fear of losing his family.

Warnings; House fires (two), child endangerment, smoke inhalation, trauma, flashbacks, lack of sleep.

Note; (D/N)- Daughter/Name, Italics indicate flashbacks

Upcoming Station 19 Fics (Not in this order);

Jack Gibson angst where Reader is trapped on the roof of a burning building, and Jack soothes her enough for her to jump.

Maya Bishop angst where Reader is trapped in a fire and Maya looses contact with her.

Dean Miller angst where Reader meets Deans parents and even though his mother kept demanding he’d get with someone, she doesn’t like the reader.

“Station 19, ladder 19 and aid 19,”

At the sudden but familiar alarm, the team of eight look up from their breakfast plates, all already beginning to stand.

“Location 495 Abernathy Lane,”

Jacks movements stop, along with his heart. “Shit,” He hears Dean mutter, “Isnt that-?”

“Y/N,” Jacks movements start up again, more rushed than before, shoving away from the table in time for his team to sprint after him and down to the vehicles.

Jumping out of the E19 fire truck, Jack shoves a breathing mask over his face, instantly shoving open the front door, looking around where his home rose in high flames,

“Y/N!” His shout is muffled due to his mask, which he briefly raises to give another yell of your name, “Y/N!”

Lowering his mask, he begins to slip past flames, towards his shared bedroom, ignoring Andy’s calls behind him to wait,

“Y/N?” Jacks shoulder runs into the bedroom door when realizing it’s locked, fist hitting the wood, “Baby, it’s Jack!”

“Jack!” Your cry is muffled, where he hears sniffling, “Jack, I can’t get to the door!”

“Shit,” Jack looks up at the door then back, where Andy sticks out a metal bar, “Hold on, baby!”

Your arms, holding your infant daughter to your chest, tremble as you glance in front of you at the flames, pressing your back closer to the wall as you hold a cloth to your daughters mouth, your elbow covering your own in an attempt to not inhale smoke.

Through the flames, you watch the door bust down, Jack and Andy coming to your view as Andy raises a fire extinguisher, putting out enough flames for Jack to kneel in front of you, hands at your face before one reaches for your daughter,

“We gotta get you out,” Jack heaves, pulling you to your feet before pulling his mask off his head, placing it over your own before pulling the extra mask to place over your daughters mouth, arm at your back to lead you out of the house,

The mask is pulled from your face when you reach your front yard, your eyes blurry as you exhale, blinking harshly as Ben and Andy move up to you, “Take her,” You plea, breathlessly, Jack watching as your eyes flutter shut, your knees buckling at once,

“Hey, hey!” Jacks arms catch you before you could completely collapse, lowering you onto the grass with a hand at the back of your head, “Get me a breathing mask, stat!”

As Andy knelt down to begin compressions to your chest, Jack worriedly looks up where Vic held onto your now crying child, Jack pushing to his feet to reach out in an attempt to soothe his daughter.

“Miranda says you only need to stay here for another night, then you’ll be able to go home,”

You nod at Jacks words. He notices the frown at your lips, his hand reaching up to cup the side of your face delicately, “Hey,” He murmurs, your gaze blurry as you look down at him, “What’s wrong? Are you in pain?”

“No,” You exhale, sighing as you glance at your husbands coworkers at the door, “What home are we gonna go to?”

“Right,” Andy sighs, quietly, Jack glancing at her then to Dean when he steps forward,

“You guys can stay at the boathouse,” He raises a shoulder, “I’d love to spend more time with my goddaughter,”

“Dean-,”

“Nope,” Dean raises a hand, turning his head away dramatically, “No protesting. I’m serious,”

Your eyes shift back to Jack, who glances over at you with a light laugh and a shake of his head.

“Station 19, Ladder 19 and Aid 19,”

“Alright, we have a house fire with a woman and a baby inside,” Maya speaks out loud, head jerking upward as she climbs out of the vehicle, “Gibson and Harrera, you two take inside for the victims,”

The two nod in unison, both pushing into the burning home and instantly taking to the stairs.

“Anyone here?!” Andy is quick to call, Jack turning to point his fire extinguisher at where flames creeped up a wall,

“Over here!” A woman’s sob pulls Jack to spin around, “Please!”

Jack steps forward, extinguishing a flame in front of him, eyes instantly settling on a woman on the floor, toddler son cradled to her chest,

His eyes blink, mind blurry as the woman’s face faded to yours, the toddler in her arms shifting to become his infant daughter. Pinching his eyes shut, he curses underneath his breath, rushing forward,

“We gotta get you out of here,” He repeats, hoarsely, Andy seeming to recognize his panic so she stepped forward, grabbing the woman’s arm,

“Clear a path!” She demands, nodding when Jack glances at her, “I’ve got them!”

“Hey, man, you alright?” Dean shuts off the engine to his car, glancing at Jack who raised his head from where his chin propped itself on his hand.

“Yeah,” Jack clears his throat, “I’m good,” The male climbs out the vehicle, instantly moving towards the boathouse so Dean sighed, following after.

“Y/N?” Jack calls, not thinking of the possibility his child could be sleeping, eyes flicking to where you exited the spare bedroom, eyebrows furrowed at the loudness of his voice,

“Hey,” You breathe, hands at his torso as his own raise to cup your face, “What’s wrong?”

“Where’s (D/N)?” He pleas, quietly, eyes raising to the open bedroom door so you could see the tears in his gaze,

“She’s taking her nap, what happened?” You slide your own hands to his face, thumb catching a tear that slipped free when his eyes snap back down to you,

“Nothing,” Jack swallows, thickly, eyes fluttering closed as he presses his lips to your forehead, “Nothing, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,”

“Jack,” You demand, barely glancing at Dean who departed to his own bedroom before looking back up to your husband, “Baby,” Your voice lowers as your thumbs continue running under his eyes, “What happened today?”

You watch as Jack inhales a deep breath, glancing at the bedroom a second time, “There was a fire,” His eyebrows flick up. Obviously. “With a mother and a baby trapped inside,”

Your eyebrows lower in realization. “I’m okay,” You usher, feeling his hands begin to clutch at the shirt along your hips, “We’re okay,” Pushing on your toes, you allow your lips to press to his, Jacks hand snapping to the back of your head to keep you against him, “We’re not going anywhere,”

“I know,” Jack slowly pulls away, forehead now to yours, “I just- I saw them and all I could think of was seeing you in the fire,”

“I know,” You echo, sliding your hand behind his neck to pull him to lean into your shoulder, his arms tightening at your lower back to pull you flush to his chest, “I love you, you know that, right?”

“I know,” Jack repeats, leaning back so his hands could wipe his tears away, “I’m gonna go check on her,”

You smile, nodding, waiting for him to step into the bedroom before looking at Dean, who frowns from his spot against his bedroom door frame. “You think he’s gonna be okay?”

You shrug, weakly, eyes glancing towards where Jack departed before stepping towards your child’s godfather, “With time, hopefully. I didn’t realize the house fire was affecting him this much,”

“He worries about you,” Dean murmurs, “All the time. And he loves you, he proves that by talking nonstop about you and that baby,”

You grin, shaking your head, “Do you think he should maybe go back to seeing his therapist?”

Deans lips part to answer, but he stops himself when Jack steps back into the main room of the house, silently closing the bedroom door behind him,

“Takeout?” Jack suggests, waiting for Dean to shrug and nod so you followed, “On me,”

Jack awakens with a sharp inhale. His body rises to sit up, one hand grasping at the collar of his shirt as the other props himself upward, single handedly pulling his shirt off at the sudden heat,

His eyes glance around the dark room, worriedly, finding his breaths shallow until his eyes land on the crib against the window, the moon just outside shining down on the sleeping infant feet away,

Eyes shifting down to you, Jack watches your back for any signs of movement- of life- you seemingly knowing in your sleep as you inhale a deep breath, exhaling slowly through your nose.

Jack finds himself sliding out from underneath the covers, inching towards the crib on light feet, in fear of walking his child. Upon reaching the crib, Jacks hands slowly lowers to place itself ghostly over (D/N)s chest, feeling the rise and fall of her long breaths,

Exhaling in relief, Jacks thumb brushes over her stomach, before he lifts his hand, bringing it up to wipe his face free of any sweat or escaped tears,

Departing back to the bed, Jack feels you shift and turn to face him, your hand lifting towards his face to let him know you were awake,

“Did I wake you?” Jack murmurs, quietly, your head shaking as he pecks your lips, then presses his lips to the crown of your head,

“Maybe you should see your therapist again,” You whisper, feeling Jacks hand pause it’s movements on your back, “Not take off work, but see her in your off shifts or in the evenings,”

“And miss my days with my girls?” Jack exhales, rolling onto his back so you scoot into his side and prop your elbow on his chest,

“We’re still gonna be here,” You soothe, hand at the stubble of his beard, “I just think it might be good for you to see her again,”

Jacks eyes find yours in the dark, “Did Dean put you up to this?”

“Nope,” You lift your hand to brush your thumb over his eyebrow, “All me,”

Jacks gaze flicks between your own eyes, before he nods, sighing through his nose, “I’ll call her before my shift in the morning,”

“Thank you,” You lean down, Jack humming against your lips, “Now please try to get some sleep,”

“Only if you stay here with me,” Jack pleas, your smile wide as he continued to kiss your lips,

“Always,”

#jack gibson #Jack Gibson x reader #Jack Gibson imagine #Jack Gibson one shot #Dean Miller #Dean Miller imagine #station 19 #station 19 x reader #station 19 imagine #station 19 one shot

[bts-reveries]

young one | 8

one image at the end

You just left Jungkook and Sian to go to work. You were currently driving while listening to songs playing on the radio, just thinking to yourself.

You couldn’t wait for the time when you could finally go back to your normal life. You know? Being able to see your son for longer than 2-3 hours a day. You wake up, get ready for class, sometimes make breakfast, wake up Sian and help him get ready, but mostly Jungkook does that. Go to school, get home from school, do school work, get ready for work, leave for work, work for hours, then get home, and sleep. It sounds a lot worse listing it like that, but you feel like you really don’t have time for anything else. The days where your professor lets you out early, or your boss tells you to go home sooner are your favorite days. You hope that one day you’ll be able to take Sian to school. As of now, Jungkook is the one who takes him to school since you go to class before he does. It sucks.

But again, you’re doing this for him!

-

It’s been a few hours since you came to work. Same thing goes on everyday. You stand in the hostess stand to welcome customers in and seat them. Some listen, some refuse, some are polite, and some say things that you wouldn’t want any of your nieces and nephews (and son of course) to hear.

Sometimes you see familiar faces, like friends from high school or college… from the first time you went to college. Those are never fun.

You were looking through the reservation lists when you saw a figure walking up to the stand.

“Hi, welcome to House of Cards! How many will be dining in tonight?” you say as enthusiastically as you can sound, gathering some menus.

“Oh, Yn? Is that you?”

You look up to the woman who said your name. You were quite confused, not remembering who she was.

Until.

“We were in the same Stats class in uni-- well, until you dropped because of--” the lady, who you now remember as one of the girls you worked on a group project with, gives you a sheepish look. “How’s that going by the way? Are you still with the dad?” She says, putting on a sad face, pursing her lips.

You laugh slightly, nodding your head.

“We’re all doing great, thanks for asking,” you smile awkwardly at her.

“Not married yet though?” She says, looking down at your ringless finger.

“—So I’m guessing just the two of you tonight?” You say, diverting the conversation back to work.

“Oh! Yes, just us two,” she says, turning to the man next to her. “It’s our anniversary.” You fake a smile for the two.

“Happy anniversary! Let me get the two of you seated.”

-

“YN!” Your head shot up from the computer screen in front of you to the sound of some familiar voices.

Your face lights up and a huge smile spread across your face when you see your girls running towards you.

“What are you guys doing here??” You ask, not seeing any of their significant others or kids with them.

“We missed you,” Yuna pouts.

“I missed you guys too, my break’s in ten minutes,” you say. You grab six menus, turning back to them. “Let’s get you seated first though.”

-

In your thirty minute break, you sat and talked with your girls. Something you’ve been needing for a while.

“So how’s school going?” Mae asks you. You shrug.

“Tougher than I thought,” you laugh half heartedly. “My professor is pretty hard on us, so I can’t miss any classes. And if I really have to, I’m screwed because I have no one to ask if I missed anything.”

“I don’t know, but it was a lot easier before I had a kid? I mean, still hard of course, but now I have to go to work right after I finish my assignments and I barely have any time to spend with my family,” you add.

“It’s understandable, you’re still adjusting. I know you’ve probably heard that a hundred times,” Sarang says. “But after a bit, it’s going to be easier to handle. Everything will fall into place eventually.”

You groan, dropping your head onto the table. Your cheek falling onto your arms.

“I hope so, I expected my life to be all in the right place by now,” you say.

“And what was it supposed to look like?” Sohyun asks.

“Well before Sian, I thought at this age I’d be ready to get married, had my career sorted out, and then eventually have a kid. After Sian, I thought at this age, I’d have a good, stable job and that I was at least engaged or already married. But right now I’m a full time student and a part time hostess at a restaurant. And a mom, but not a wife, nor am I close to being one,” you say sadly. Byul pouts, petting your head.

“Well, we might not be where we expected to be at this age, I know for all of us, we’ve been through things our younger selves would have never imagined to be, but like what Sarang said… it’ll all fall into place in the end. So don’t lose hope,” Bora says, smiling down at you.

“I’ll hold on,” you say, staring into space. Specifically the direction of where you seated your old classmate.

“What are you looking at?” Yuna asks, turning to the direction of where you were looking.

“You see that girl in the green dress across from the guy with the fidgeting fingers?” you say. The girls turn and nod.

“We were groupmates in college. I never liked her. I think her boyfriend’s proposing to her tonight. She mentioned to me that it’s their anniversary.” Right when you say this, the guy reaches into his pocket, pulling out a small box.

“Oh…” Mae says, watching the girl get proposed to right in the middle of the restaurant.

“Don’t look,” Byul says, covering your eyes, making you giggle.

“It’s okay,” you say, pulling her hand down, and sitting up.

“My time will come one day. I will get that degree, get a job, marry Jungkook, and have another Sian,” you say to yourself, and out loud to your friends. A smile lit up on all of their faces.

“To Yn!” Sarang yells out, holding up her glass of water. No one was drinking alcohol tonight but you all raised up your drinks anyways.

“TO YN!”

You seven were too caught up and into the moment to remember that a proposal was currently going on and that your coworkers and other guests were clapping for the newly engaged couple that you didn’t see the dirty looks coming your way.

“I never really thought of how I want to get proposed, but if Jungkook ever mentions it to any of you, or any of the guys, please tell him not to do it in the middle of a restaurant.”

Sohyun laughs, pointing her glass of raspberry ice tea towards you, “will do.”

-

“Yn,” one of your coworkers called. You turn away from your girls, looking up at him.

“Hm?”

“Your breaks over,” he says.

“Oh--”

“Aww, no,” Byul says a bit too loud, quickly slapping her hand over her mouth. “I mean, y-yeah Yn, you should get back to work,” she says, nudging you out of the seat. You and the other girls couldn’t help but laugh.

“Okay, I’ll be right there,” you tell him, turning back to your friends.

“I’ll see you girls later,” you say, walking back to the hostess stand in the front of the restaurant.

“Yn!” You turn to your name being called and you see that girl from your class showing off her ring to you. You gave her a smile, giving her an awkward thumbs up before turning back around to roll your eyes.

Just a few more hours and you’re out of here.

young one

♛ part eight: ringless ♛

pairings: photographer, dad!jungkook x hostess, mom!reader

a/n: sorry for the lack of posts! hoping to get back on that grind 😣

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TAGLIST IS CLOSED!!

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#bts-reveries #bts x reader #bts fluff #bts au #bts smau #bts social media au #bts x you #bts #bts dad au #dad bts au #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #jungkook fluff #jungkook smau #jungkook social media au #jungkook au #jungkook dad au #dad jungkook au #namjoon smau #jin smau #yoongi smau #hoseok smau #jimin smau #taehyung smau

[just-dreaming-marvel]

Love and Medicine ~ 9

MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 2,720ish

Summary: You start to question Steve.

I do not own Marvel or Grey’s Anatomy.

Something at been bother you about Steve, as of late. When you two would spend the night together, it was always at your place. And you were starting to realize that he knew more about you than you did him. (Though he still didn’t know about your parents.) You sat on your bed and watched as Steve got ready for the day. He was brushing his teeth when you finally spoke up.

“Let’s sleep at your place tonight,” you said.

“What?” Steve questioned. His brow furrowed as he faced you, tooth brush still in his mouth.

“I mean, why are we always sleeping at my house? Do you even have one?”

He spit into the sink. “One what?”

“A house. Or an apartment. With a closet and your stuff in it. Your personal stuff. Do you even have on of those.”

“Mmm,” he hummed with a nod, wiping his face. “You hungry?” He gathered his things as he headed towards the door. 

“Steve, do you even—“ 

But he was gone, leaving you on the bed, sighing. After freshening up for the day, you went down to the kitchen. Steve was sitting at the table, a bowl of cereal in front of him, with your roommates scattered around the kitchen.

“You know, I like it here,” Steve told you when he noticed you. “You sad so yourself, you like having your things around, sleeping in your own bed.”

“You’re like a health nut, aren’t you?” Clint questioned Steve as he examined his cereal. “You eat muesli every morning.”

“No,” Steve argued, mouth full, “I don’t.”

“Yes, you do,” Val said. “Well, at least for the last seven days.”

“Oh, come on. I haven’t been here for a whole week… have I?”

“Sadly, you have,” Scott said.

“See?” You pointed to your roommates. “Even they think it’s weird.”

~~~

Eventually, your work day started and you were going through the motions of everything. Steve met up with you as you walked through the halls. And you couldn’t help but continue what you were talking about this morning.

“It’s just that I hardly know anything about you,” you said.

“You know that I just moved here. You know that I like ferry boats.”

“Yes, but where exactly did you move here from? And what about your friends? Or family? Do you have any?”

“I’m a surgeon. I don’t have friends. And I don’t have family anymore either.”

“See, I didn’t know that. And everybody has friends. What do you do on your days off? These are all important questions.”

“Ah, important for who?”

“Me. We’re having sex every night. I think I deserve details.”

“You have more details than most,” he smirked.

“See, this is going somewhere weird. I want facts, and until I get them, my pants are staying on.”

“Or you could just roll with it. Be flexible. See what happens.”

“I’m not flexible.”

Steve laughed. “There is where I disagree.” He winked, before getting paged. He looked down at it. “I've got to go. We'll find these things out.” He slowly started walking away. “That's the fun part. You know? That's the gravy.”

“That is what I'm talking about. I don't want to be your gravy.”

“Gravy?” Tony questioned, walking up from behind. “What about gravy? And why are you two flirting in public?”

“We weren’t flirting. We were—“

“Flirting. Stop lying to me and yourself.”

“I’m not lying.”

“Mhmm. I know lying, and flirting, when I see it. And you, my dear, are doing both.”

“Shut up.”

~~~

An equally fortunate and unfortunate thing, you were assigned to Steve’s service today. You were currently looking at a patient’s scans. The patient was slowly becoming paralyzed, and you were trying to figure out why.

“See, this,” you pointed to the scans. “The guy's films are clear. There's no reason I can see for his creeping paralysis.”

“It's just so surprising,” Steve responded, still studying the scans. “I expected an intrusion into the spinal space or bony spur in the nucleus pulposus.”

“Well, you were wrong. You don't always get what you expect, do you?”

With furrowed brows, he turned to face you. “What is your problem?”

“Give me something to go on. Anything. What are your grandparents' names?”

“I don't have grandparents.”

“Where'd you grow up? What's your favorite flavor of ice cream? Where'd you spend your summer vacations?”

“Lighten up. It'll be good for your blood pressure.” 

Steve walked out of the room. You followed him, but stopped at the doorway.

“Oh, don’t you tell me to lighten up!” You called after him. “I’ll lighten up when I… feel light.” You huffed and shook your head. “That man.”

~~~

Steve was speaking to your patient, Mr. Wells, and his wife when you went to check on Mr. Wells.

“Any changes, Mr. Wells?” Steve wondered.

“I can’t move my legs at all now,” Mr. Wells replied.

“He said he was moving his legs when he came in,” Mrs. Wells said. “What’s wrong with him?”

“Have you been under any stress lately, Mr. Wells?” You questioned.

“You know what’s making me stressed? Is being in here and not being able to move,” he responded.

“Dr. L/N,” Steve called, waiting you to clarify.

“Emotional trauma can be converted into something physical, right?” You asked.

“Yes, it’s possible.”

“Like hysterical numbness or paralysis. Maybe there is no physiological reason, and he's just having a conversion reaction.”

“You think it's psychosomatic?”

The curtain behind you and Steve flew open, revealing another patient and Val.

“It’s not in your head, man,” the patient said. “I believe you.”

“Mr. Duff, please,” Val said, closing the curtain.

“Who was that?” Steve asked.

“Psych sent him down,” you explained, having heard Val complain earlier. “He has visions.”

“Is that it?” Mr. Wells wondered. “Am I cray?”

“No. No,” Steve quickly said. “I'm gonna order a higher-level MRI. We're gonna figure this out.”

~~~

At lunch time, Peter, Natasha, Scott, Clint, Val, and yourself found a small room to eat in, away from everyone else. Natasha was sitting down at a desk. She lifted up her sandwich, smelling it, before quickly dropping it.

“If that’s turkey, can I have some?” Clint asked.

“It’s soggy,” Natasha responded.

“If it’ll kill you,” Peter commented. “Solve everything.”

“I coulda gotten that intubation,” Clint murmured. “I am good at intubations.”

You took a bite of your food, cringing at the smell. “Why does everything in a hospital smell like a hospital?” You questioned.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, Clint,” Scott said. “Everybody makes mistakes.”

“You know, I’m good at a lot of things,” Clint continued.

“You know what, I'm gonna tell you something,” Natasha began, “Hey, Clint. You need to get laid. See that nurse over there.” Natasha pointed to the nurse at the station out the window. “She’s single. She's got brown hair. Go ask her out.”

“In case you forgot, I intubated an esophagus.”

“Dude, you're tweaking,” Peter said. “Maybe you should go see that psychic.”

“Mr. Duff is not a psychic!” Val exclaimed as Peter left the room.

“I am trying to help you,” Natasha told Clint, standing up. “Go buy her a latte and freshen up your gonads, please.” Then she left.

“What’s with her?” Val asked, looking at you for an answer.

You shrugged. “Don’t ask me.”

~~~

After lunch, you headed back to check on Mr. Wells. Steve was already in there again, looking extremely concerned. 

“First my legs, then my stomach,” Mr. Wells complained before looking scared. “Doc! Doc, my hands can’t move.”

“Squeeze my fingers,” Steve ordered, placing his fingers in Mr. Wells’ hand. 

“I can’t.”

“Right here.” Steve tried the other hand. “No? Let me know if you feel this.” He poked the patient with a needle. “How about that?” 

“No,” Mr. Wells responded.

Steve tried several different places before giving up. “Alright. I’ll be right back.” He headed to the nurses station, motioning for you to follow him. “Nurse, cancel the second MRI. Call down and prep an OR stat.”

“You’re operating?” You questioned. “On what? If there was something to fix, wouldn't we have seen it?”

“I think the MRI missed a clot somewhere in his upper spine. I'm gonna cut him open. I'm going in.”

“What if you're wrong? Couldn't unnecessary spinal surgery do more damage?”

“If we wait any longer and this expands into his brain stem, we have a paralyzed man who can't breathe. I'm trusting my instincts. Sometimes you've got to take a chance to save a life.”

~~~

The OR was stressful, even before Steve cut Mr. Wells open.

“We've got to save this cord,” Steve stated, grabbing a scalpel. “This guy's built like the Rock of Gibraltar.”

“You want me to start?” You wondered.

“No, I'm gonna to cut here from the base of the neck to the rib cage.” Steve pointed, showing you exactly what he meant. “I want you to hit the bleeders.”

“I still don't think we should be doing this,” you expressed your concerns as Steve cut open. You immediately started going for the bleeders.

“This guy has a spinal hematoma.”

“We don't know that.”

“Which left untreated are almost always fatal.”

“You're cutting blind. Whatever happened to being practical?”

“I need to see more here. Retractor.” A nurse handed Steve a retractor.

“Wow,” you gasped, staring at Mr. Wells’ spine. 

“There’s no ‘wow’ in practical’.” You could practically hear Steve’s smirk.

After everything was clear, you and Steve began looking at the spine closely.

“Third thoracic laminae. Nothing,” you said. “I think I see the dura pulsating here.”

“No, it's not,” Steve responded. “Keep looking.”

“We have been at this for four hours. Maybe he just injured his spinal cord and there's nothing to fix.”

“L/N, when you read your books, make sure you reference them correctly. Progressive paralysis implies a pressure lesion.”

“My books got me here—“ You were interrupted by the monitors beeping.

“Pressure’s up to 180/111,” a nurse informed. “The pulse is in the 40s.”

“What is it?”

“I’m pushing 70 milligrams diazoxide.”

“Okay. Autonomic dysreflexia,” Steve said.

“Damage to the sympathetic nervous system?” You asked.

“BP and the heart rate are unstable.”

“We’re in trouble, aren’t we?”

“We’ve got to find the clot.”

“I can see the cord below the dura. Is he gonna stroke out?”

“Focus, L/N. We're gonna find the clot. It's there. Clean up, please.”

“BP's still up,” the nurse reminded. “Heart rate's at 44.”

“Get on those bleeders,” Steve ordered. “Keep looking, Dr. L/N.”

After a few long minutes later, Steve let out a happy sigh.

“What is it?” You asked.

“See for yourself,” he replied, moving his hand. “The second thoracic vertebrae.”

You leaned in, seeing the clot clearly. “Oh, my gosh. I see it. It’s really there.”

“Of course it is. Let's suction and pack this baby, shall we?”

The rest of the surgery was finished quickly and without any more problems. Soon, you and Steve were in the scrub room outside the OR.

“You were right,” you admitted. “Is he gonna be okay?”

“I think so,” Steve responded.

“But you don’t know that.”

“I know we stopped the paralysis from advancing.”

“But, you don't know if the paralysis he already has will be permanent.”

“No.”

“You know, you keep taking everything on faith. How do you know what's real and what's not?”

“You just do. You know some people would call this a relationship. The kind where you exchange keys, leave your toothbrush over.”

“Who? Who would call it that?”

“Me. I would.”

“And I’m supposed to believe you?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Then show me something. Give me a reason to believe.”

With a small, teasing smile, Steve left the room.

~~~

Your group of interns had once again found yourselves in the deserted hallway.

“I tried to talk Rogers out of that clot surgery,” you said quietly. “What is wrong with me?”

“So, basically, you tried to kill the guy,” Peter stated.

“Basically, you’re an ass,” Natasha retorted.

“Come on. You know you want it.”

Clint came walking in. “This, uh, is Clint,” he said, pointing to his name tag. “And Clint has a hot date.”

“Oh, that’s great, Clint,” you responded with a smile.

“Yeah.”

“Left pocket of my lab coat, Clint,” Peter said, going to leave. “No glove, no love.” 

Clint grabbed Peter’s arm before he could fully leave. He took a condom from his pocket.

“My psychic had his surgery,” Val stated.

“Yeah?” Clint wondered.

“I wonder what happened with his… gift.”

“Come on,” Natasha scoffed. “We all know he’s crazy.”

“Thought you said you didn’t believe in that stuff,” you added.

"I grew up in a trailer park,” Val explained. “I waited tables, which was supposed to put me through college, but my mother was always calling these psychics all the time. And the bills started piling up, so I had to use my money to pay them. When I turned 18, I left and never went back. But this guy has been saying things to me, things he couldn't possibly know anything about. So I just wonder.”

~~~

“Do you have sensation anywhere else?” You asked Mr. Wells as you examined him.

“Some feeling in my stomach and feet, I guess,” he responded.

“Bladder and bowels?”

“Not so good still.”

“He said the pressure stockings help relieve clots and bed sores?” Mrs. Wells wondered.

“They do,” you agreed.

“I wanted to thank you for everything,” Mr. Wells said. “Believing in me, that I wasn't making it up.”

“Well, I'll come back tomorrow, then.”

“Hey, I wanted to show you something. I wasn't sure it would last but now look.” He barely moved one of his fingers. “I know it's hardly anything, but…”

“No, it’s something,” you smiled. “It's something really big. I’ll make sure Dr. Rogers knows and I’ll see you both in the morning.”

~~~

Steve met you in the lobby and led you to his car. He opened the door for you before hurrying over to the other side, getting in, and starting the car. Driving, you quickly noticed that Steve wasn’t taking you to your house.

“Where are we going?” You asked.

“Trust me,” he replied, glancing at you.

You bit your lip and nodded, turning to look out the window as the city flew by. Before you knew it, you guys had crossed into New Jersey and heading into the more suburban area of it. Steve stopped in front of a piece of land with no house on it. The whole piece of empty land had to be at least 20 acres, with groups of trees scattered around it. Helping you out of the car, Steve began leading you towards the trees.

“Are you going to murder me and bury my body here?” You asked.

“No,” Steve chuckled. “Of course not.”

“Where are we?”

“Shh, shh. I’m going to tell you.”

Steve led you around the corner, revealing an airstream trailer with a small porch. It was almost magical, sitting in the midst of all those trees.

“Alright,” Steve breathed out, nervously. 

He let go of your hand and moved to sit on the edge of the porch. You stayed where you were at, taking everything in.

“My mother’s name was Sarah, my dad’s was Joseph,” Steve stated. “They both died before I graduated high school. I don’t have any siblings. I like Neapolitan ice cream and just a plain beer. I like to work out and I’ve recently started fly fishing. I also cheat when I do the crossword puzzle on Sundays. I never dance in public, even at dances. But only cause I don’t know how. My favorite type of music from the early decades of the 1900’s. My favorite color is blue, like from the American flag. And I live in this trailer. All this land is mine. I have no idea what I’m gonna do with it. So… well, that’s it. That’s all you’ve earned for now. The rest you’re just… just gonna have to take on faith.”

Not revealing an emotions, you walked to the trailer, studying it. Steve stood up, carefully watching you. Walking towards the door, you turned back around with a small smile and reached your hand out to him.

“Show me how this faith thing works,” you whispered. “Please.”

next chapter >

Sorry if it’s all over the place. I owed it to you guys to get this out there.

NOTES: from now on the taglist when be added by a reblog. I will reblog it using my second account, @just-dreaming-marvel-2​​​. Just so that my main page doesn’t get too cluttered.

If you want to be added to the tag list, please dm me or send in an ask.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #steve rodgers x reader #steve rodgers imagine #the avengers x reader #avengers x reader #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #marvel imagines #Steve Rogers #greys anatomy au

[unitchiefs-blackbirdphoenix]

Truth and Awakenings Ch. 3

Summary: A Jemily rewrite of certain scenes in 14x15-15x02, with a few additional scenes :)

Chapter summary: JJ finds Everett Lynch and his daughter before getting shot.

(TW: blood, guns)

Read on AO3

About a week had passed and the team gets a call that Everett Lynch was back to break Grace out of jail, and they had to find the father-daughter duo fast before they cause any more damage. Emily had assigned JJ to partner up with her during this case, and they were locating Lynch and his daughter.

The two agents exited the car, slamming the doors closed. “Emily, I don’t think we can wait for backup,” JJ said, pulling out her gun.

Emily nodded and pointed straight ahead before running. “Alright, I’ll take this one. You take the parking garage at Piedmont and 10th.”

JJ had her gun aimed and steady in her hands as she made her way through the parking garage. She came around a corner before she made her presence known to the father and daughter.

“Everett Lynch, FBI! Stop!” She yelled, face stern. “Drop your weapon and place your hands on your head. Now!”

“Ok! Hey! Take it easy,” Everett raised his hands before slowly placing his gun on the ground. “Gee, lady, there’s no reason to gun down a daddy in front of his little girl.”

“All right, kick it over. Kick it over!” she yelled again, not breaking eye contact with the father. He kicked the gun over to her, and Grace was still standing with her bag.

JJ looked at the girl, “All right, Grace, you, too. Come on. Drop your backpack and let me see your hands. Come on! Now!” She did as she was told and slowly dropped the item.

“All right. Don’t move,” JJ warned the two. She carefully angled her body and reached down to grab the gun Everett had kicked over.

Grace pulled a gun that was hidden inside her jacket and aimed it towards the agent. JJ heard three gunshots crack in the parking garage, and fell back down to the ground as blood started to pool from the left side of her stomach. All she heard was faint laughter from Everett and tires screeching, concluding that the father and daughter had driven away.

The blonde was lying down on the ground, coughing up the copper-y taste of liquid out of her mouth. She tried to move but found that she couldn’t, and instead, tried to calmly breathe as best as she could.

“JJ, what’s your location?” she barely heard through her earpiece. ”JJ, do you copy? JJ?” She couldn’t answer. The voice sounded feminine and in a hurry. JJ closed her eyes and silently prayed it was her coming to her rescue. ”Hold on. I’m on my way.”

In less than a minute later, JJ blinked a few times and saw a body moving towards her. It was blurry to see their face. They had lightish hair and were murmuring their worries for the injured agent. It was Emily.

“No, no, no. Come on, JJ,” Emily panicked, putting her gun back in her holster. “You’re ok. You’re gonna be ok,” she said and tried to cover her wound. She yelled into her small mic, “JJ’s down! She’s been hit, we need an ambulance. Now!”

“Emily…” JJ weakly coughed out.

“Shh. Just- just stay with me, ok? Just keep breathing. Eyes on me,” Emily instructed. “Get an ambulance, now, damn it!” she ordered again in an almost shaky voice. Her hands nervously shook. The recurring nightmare she had years ago was starting to come to life: finding JJ lying on the ground surrounded by blood.

JJ nodded in response, fingers reaching out to grab Emily’s other hand. The blonde squeezed her wrist and felt her hand being enveloped by Emily’s.

“Please d- don’t leave me, Emily,” JJ said, struggling to keep her eyes open. She needed to let herself know that Emily wasn’t going to fade away, like she did in her hallucination when she was tortured and at her breaking point. So, she tightly held Emily’s hand close to her stomach to ground herself.

Emily softly shook her head and rubbed a thumb over JJ’s knuckles. “I got you, JJ. I got you.”

When the ambulance came, the unit chief had gone with them. During the ride to the hospital, JJ found Emily’s hand again and ran both of her thumbs over her knuckles, squeezing it for reassurance to both Emily and herself. Emily frowned at JJ, all of a sudden feeling guilty. She didn’t want anyone getting hurt, especially if they were one of her closest friends.

“It’s ok. You’re gonna be ok, JJ.” At this point, Emily didn't know if she was telling JJ or herself that. The younger agent nodded and her eyes became a little heavier.

One of the paramedics looked at the two women, and nodded their head towards Emily. “Are you her wife?”

Emily’s eyes widened at the assumption. “Oh, n- no. She has a husband.”

They chuckled and shook their head, “Could’ve fooled me.”

Emily furrowed her eyebrows at the remark. Did people really think she and JJ were married? Sure, they were close, but… did they ever act or look like a couple? She shook her head at the thought and focused on her friend’s grip on her hand, which had started loosening. That was the moment Emily lifted her free hand to bite on her thumbnail.

--------------------

The hospital back doors opened and the paramedics made their way inside, pushing the gurney JJ was on, while Emily followed closely behind. The blonde heard several voices talking over her.

“Spike a one-liter bag.”

“Airway’s unstable. Check for arterial bleeds.”

“Gunshot wound to the upper torso. Bullet entered under left arm. No exit wound. Pulse is thready, breathing shallow.”

Emily stood back and watched the medical staff hooked JJ to the machines, clipping the pulse oximeter onto her index finger and checking her blood pressure.

“Need her for transfer.”

“Stats are dropping. High flow O2. 15 liters.”

A gradual rapid beeping was heard on the EKG machine, and Emily’s eyes switched back and forth between JJ and the screen. “She’s crashing.”

Emily quietly gasped and her eyes widened in fear. Her hands slightly shook again, and she lifted one of them to her mouth to chew on her thumbnail again, suddenly finding it difficult to file away into the little boxes of her mind. I can’t lose her.

The doctor stepped in and grabbed the defibrillator paddles, rubbing the liquid gel together. “Clear.”

JJ’s body quickly jumped at the shock and the beeping slowed down a little. “I got a heartbeat.” Emily sighed in relief.

The doctor made her way towards the grey-haired woman. “Are you her partner?”

“No. I- I can call him and tell him what’s going on,” Emily stammered. Seriously, what was it with the people in this hospital thinking she and JJ were a couple?

“He better get here quick.”

Emily nodded and pulled her phone out of her pocket, dialling Will’s number.

--------------------

Will opened the hospital door in the front and Emily stood up from her chair. “Will.”

“How did this happen?” Will asked in confusion. “Why wasn’t she wearing a vest?”

“She was. The bullet missed the kevlar and entered just under her arm,” Emily said. She knew how protective he was of JJ. Of course, he’s her husband, so he has to be. Even though Will trusted JJ in her abilities as an agent, Emily knew he didn’t like hearing about JJ getting hurt on the job. Neither did she.

WIll glanced down for a moment. “The doctor told me her heart stopped.”

Emily hesitantly nodded, momentarily closing her eyes to keep that thought away from her. “It did, but they brought her back.”

“I need to see her.”

“She’s already in surgery,” she said. “It’s gonna be a while. Why don’t you sit down?”

Will sighed deeply before sitting down. Emily looked at him with sympathy. He really cared for JJ and she could see that. And JJ loves him, too. She didn’t want to disrupt a perfectly happy marriage for her own selfish reasons.

“Um… Is it ok if I wait with you?” Emily offered.

“Yeah, of course,” Will nodded, making room for her to sit down. “You know, Emily, JJ’s gonna want to see you, too, when she wakes up.”

Emily gave a silent nod to his statement. “She’s strong,” she chuckled. “I know she can make it through this.”

Her eyes landed back to her lap and began picking at her fingernails, one of the signs that showed she was stressed. Emily had called Garcia earlier to inform the team that Lynch and his daughter ran away again before waiting for Will. She desperately wanted to focus her attention back on the case, but JJ getting hurt kept intruding her thoughts.

Will turned his head to see Emily tapping her foot and looking away from him. He knew how worried she was about his ex-wife. The fact that she had been showing almost all signs of stress right now told him that she really loves and cares for JJ.

Will thought back to the two women’s interactions, and how much they’ve worried over each other when the other person was in danger. He remembered seeing the sudden brightness in JJ’s eyes and how her body eases whenever Emily was around. When Will was strapped to a bomb during that one case with bank-robbing, terroristic unsubs, he trusted Emily to take care of JJ and Henry for him, if he died.

At that moment, Will realized how in love both Emily and his ex-wife are with each other. He doesn’t know if JJ had told her already, but whatever happens, he was always going to be supportive of them.

#jemily #jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #criminal minds #jemily fic #tw guns #tw blood

[stealingpotatoes]

The World As It Should(’ve) Be(en)

(feat. some illustrations with no consistent style that were all done in under ten minutes)

I know I’m not the only one who thought Delilah’s “The World As It Should Be” could have been a lot cooler.., so get this: what if there was another mission to dh2

(trust me it's a cool idea -- if you can’t be bothered to read, just look at the pictures) 

So EVERYTHING is the same up until the bit where you go into the portal. You roll up to Death To The Empress thinking that's the last mission... but no! You go in the portal and it gives you your end of mission stats! and you're like ?? wait what i thought i was about to go kill Delilah?

The ACTUAL final mission (and actual Delilah take-out mission) takes place in a Much Better version of The World As It Should Be. 

The final mission starts and you land exactly at the port where you start Death To The Empress, but everything is different about Dunwall. everything’s completely off and wack;  it's sunny, the streets are bright, everyone looks happy! there are flowers everywhere! It's super aesthetic and pretty. The clothing’s also different from the rest of the game. 

You walk through the same streets you walked through in the mission you just did, and there aren't wolfhounds and ppl patrolling the streets, it's not in ruin, it all looks very nice! (you land at the docks for parallels/ to make it very obvious what's changed, not because it makes sense). People are talking; they're happy! there are no guards about at all so you can walk freely and see it all, explore around this world. And the people are talking about how great empress delilah is, mainly. 

And as you go through, you find notes, books, and dialogue etc that hints to an entirely different past; in the first parts of dunwall, you find that delilah has been empress for like 26 years! not just a month and a half. The story pieces together as you go along, and you work out that this is a world where Delilah was never thrown out and her father's false promises were fulfilled. This is her world as it should be. 

But things keep happening to remind you that it isn't real; perhaps the sky sometimes turns to the Void, with whales floating above you, and things will somtimes momentarily look like a painting of Delilah's, not detailed reality. People’s speech repeats and loops too often. Creepiest of all, people randomly turn to stone, then back out, as if it never happened. If you put the corrupted rune in earlier, there might be more glitches than if you didn't. the glitches get more pronounced/ more obvious as you get closer and everything starts to feel a little too perfect, more and more as you go on. Everything becomes more uncomfortable. (And if you kill people in the world, nobody reacts at all. They just let you do it)

Plus, overall it feels like a very childish city? as if this might all be a little girl's dollhouse, not a real place. 

You make your way to the Tower, where you find that there’s a party going on. A really nice party -- puts Lady Boyle’s Last Party to shame. Dunwall Tower again looks super nice and aesthetic. The outfits are again really nice but again rather childish. 

A cool glitch here would be the partygoers keep stopping and just looking dead at you w no transition or anything. One second they’re talking, the next everyone at the party is staring straight at you. Then suddenly they’re talking again, as if that never happened. Also a lot of the partygoers faces repeat too often, reminding you that this is a simulation. 

In the tower/ closer to the tower, you find more history stuff, but it's more intimate/ detailed i guess? ONE VERY NOTABLE THING YOU FIND is letters from Jessamine (!!!) who is very much alive but is just -- and has always been -- the imperial princess!!!!!!!

The letters mention stuff that shows she and delilah are close. jessamine is in this and not suffering bc it's delilah's childish, perfect world! where nothing went wrong and jess is still her sister and del doesn't hate jess! (this is to kind of push it in your face that Del is Like You i guess, but also that smthn smthn she's still thinking like a little girl bc this all stems off childhood trauma etc)

Tho as people, not the player character, Emily & Corvo are ignored in the world as it should be/ there's no mention of jessamine's family bc this is delilah's world and she's not thinking abt other people. 

At the party, you see a woman who you discover is Delilah's mother, alive and well -- which again pushes the whole "this is delilah's perfect world". She talks to you a bit, talks about delilah. Makes you see a different side of her (but you can't be sure it's real; this is Delilah’s perfect, adoring world). She says she ought to go somewhere else. Things keep glitching, whales phase through the walls (it’s super cool). 

You continue through the party, when suddenly you see a woman in a dark dress. She stands out from the rest of the party, in their bright colours, and it’s pretty hard to miss her. This woman is none other than Lady Jessamine Kaldwin, your dead mother or secret wife (whose, bear in mind, soul you let go 2 missions ago). Her outfit is similar to the one in Delilah’s childhood painting of her, childishness of Delilah’s world repeated. 

The fact Jessamine is here makes Delilah almost more relatable (especially seeing as you just spoke to her lost loved one, her mother). It makes you understand her more because you know the protag wants more than anything to have a world where Jess lives. It helps you to understand why Delilah made this more. Actually, this whole mission is sort of "uhuhuh delilah is actually sympathetic" BUT you can still very much interpret it as her lying to you, because this is a manipulation of reality -- what's to say she isn't still lying?

Anyway, you can go up and talk to Jessamine (the game sort of encourages you to talk to her). But she doesn’t recognise you. Emily and Corvo don’t exist in Delilah’s false world, so Jessamine has never known you. It’s very painful for the protag (you can hear it in their dialogue), because their loved one is alive, but she doesn’t know you. You have dialogue options to try to convince her it’s you/ she knows you, but they don’t work. 

While Jessamine doesn’t recognise you, she does say she’d certainly like to spend more time with you. She tries to convince you to stay here, more or less (yes, Inception is one of my favourite movies, what about it?) But the protag says they have a mission/ that they need to see Delilah.    

Jessamine will offer to take you to Delilah, which results in a conversation -- will get to that later. The other option is keep winding through the party and to the throne room yourself. 

Either way, you get to the throne room, where you find Delilah. Again direct parallel. Same pose as before, but this time, her throne room isn't dark and covered in murderous vines, it's bright and full of adoring people/ partygoers (it’s a sort of parallel to the start of the game too, especially if you walk in with Jessamine).

 Delilah doesn’t quite know you’re here. She has a vague idea of who you are, but she doesn’t hate you at all. Breanna is by Delilah’s side, no matter what you did in the Conservatory. However, you don’t see any of the other Coup Crew members there -- this highlights how they were just tools to her, not people she cared for.

So you have three (yes, three — this is where things get even more fun) options here. Lethal, non-lethal, and the option I’ll get to later. 

Lethal is straightforward. You kill Delilah however (nobody stops you), and the entire world begins to collapse in on itself/ break apart and very disruptively becomes the Void again. This maybe ends with you having to fight/ assassinate some Delilah copies in the near empty void/ something more similar to the World As It Should Be as we see in game.

Non-lethal is easier if you placed the corrupted rune on the throne in DTTE, but you can still do it otherwise. It would of course be something to do with trapping Delilah in the World -- somehow cutting off the exit before you go so she can’t escape, should she realise this isn’t reality. 

If you pick either of these ways, you go through the portal again and return to the depressing and dark Dunwall, your Dunwall, and free your family member. (Or take the throne if you’re in super high chaos, I guess). All goes the same. 

Now, the third option. The third option is to stay in the false world. It’s to stay with Jessamine, in this perfect Dunwall. To get this option, you talk to Delilah after Jess takes you to her (though you can still talk to her without Jess guiding you, Jess’ll appear). 

Of course, you have the option to talk to Delilah and say this is all crazy, it’s not real, and proceed to do the former two options. But you also have the option to say you understand her or something, and she more or less offers for you to stay. 

When you first express interest in staying, the Outsider suddenly appears. He’s there to try to convince you that you need to get rid of Delilah, and that your other family member is frozen in stone back in the real Dunwall. But then what Delilah does, absolute madlad, is make a copy of your family member, but how they looked in DH1, not now (idk HOW, but she does it -- she is god in this part of the Void so she just can). Delilah wants you to stay, especially if you’re Marked. Jessamine also tries to convince you to remain here, and she’s harder to ignore. 

You again have the option to reject Delilah’s reality (you get a lot of options to do this), but if you choose to ignore the Outsider, you say something about him “wanting to keep power for himself”, just a lot of insulting really (being about as nice as he was to you, maybe.)e’ll disappear again, unable to stay in Delilah’s part of the Void. And you can stay with your unbroken family, with Jessamine who is alive. And not return to the real world, where you don’t know if your family member will be able to be revived from stone. 

(Seeing as Delilah was in Jess’ heart, perhaps she’s able to make a Jess who is almost the same as the Jess you knew)  

The third ending plays on the themes of “emily/ corvo has been ignoring the suffering in the Empire”. This is the ultimate way you can ignore it all. You can choose to completely and utterly ignore the now in ruin empire that you walked through earlier, and ignore all the people you promised to help along the way and everything you learnt. Or, you can show you’ve changed since the start, and go back to harsh reality. It won’t be nice, but you can’t ignore your people’s suffering again. Imo it gives the character more of an arc, rather than only having the option to return to the throne. 

But yeah, if you pick the third ending, the Outsider of course does his speech. He tells you how the Empire has falled to chaos, fallen to civil war, as everyone vys for the throne and its power. He tells you how your allies fare. And then you see Empress Delilah on her throne in the false world (you see a few glitches to remind you it’s fake). But then you see the protagonist and their family together. It’s a really cute family moment, and aside from the protagonist being the wrong age compared to their family (you’ve got adult Em with dh1 Corvojess, or dh2 Corvo with Jess and 10yo Emily). There are no glitches bc the protag would be ignoring them.  Everything seems entirely perfect. 

Anyways! I hope you liked this! Don’t get me wrong, I love Dishonored 2, it’s one of my favourite games. I just think the World As It Should Be was a sort of missed oppurtunity for something VERY cool. 

#dishonored 2 #dishonored #delilah copperspoon #emily kaldwin #corvo attano #Jessamine kaldwin

[hutchhitched]

Naked, Hungover, and Married

Written by: @hutchhitched​

Prompt 63: Katniss and Peeta who are exes wake up together naked, hungover, and married. [submitted by anonymous]

Ratings/Warnings: M

A/N: I’m continuing to post the nine @everlarkficexchange prompts I took and then sat on throughout the early months of the pandemic. Thanks for your patience, and I hope you enjoy. Huge thanks to @javistg for understanding the delays.

_________________

Katniss blinked her eyes open slowly and squinted against the sunlight streaking through the…very unfamiliar bedroom.

 “What the hell?” she grumbled and slapped her hand toward the side of the bed where she hoped she’d find her cell phone. Her head was splitting, and she needed to inhale a gallon of water stat to start the rehydration process. Obviously, she’d had way too much to drink last night.

 “Ow! What the fuck?”

 Spooked out of her mind, Katniss shot upright in bed at the sound of the deep, masculine voice that emanated from under the covers and quickly grabbed the sheet and clutched it to her very exposed, very naked chest. She resisted the urge to glance under the covers. Her stomach sank as she realized she was completely nude and lying in bed with a squirming masculine something or other.

 And if she wasn’t mistaken, that voice sounded really, really familiar. But it couldn’t be. Could it?

 “Shit!” she screeched when Peeta Mellark emerged from the tangled pile of bedclothes and pillows, his blue eyes cloudy with sleep and creases in his skin from where he’d slept with his face pressed into the pillow.

 “Katniss Everdeen?” he mumbled in a gravelly baritone that made her toes curl and tingle. He’d always had a gloriously sexy voice, even when she wanted to claw his eyes out. Most especially when he turned his pouty mouthed, dimpled face to hers and blinked his bluer-than-the-Caribbean eyes at her in an attempt to get what he wanted. “What are you doing here?”

 “I don’t even know where I am!”

 “Stop yelling,” he grumbled and pressed a palm to the spot between his eyebrows. “I have a killer of a hangover.”

 Peeta tossed the covers aside and rolled over so he could sit up. Her mouth gaped open when she realized that, like her, he was completely naked. And his ass. Was. Glorious. Golden skin over plump cheeks so rounded and ripe she wanted to take a bite out of them. She didn’t usually like peaches so firm, but she’d make an exception for—

 “Don’t stand up!” she screeched, intentionally interrupting her very inappropriate train of thought, and threw a pillow at him. Startled, he grabbed it and held it over his crotch but not before she glimpsed his (very impressive, if she did say so herself) morning wood arcing proudly out of a dark blonde thatch of hair between thick, muscular thighs. “Good God. Put some clothes on.”

 If he wasn’t already infuriating, he certainly was when he smirked and ran his gaze over her curled frame hiding under the sheets and blindly groping for her clothes on the floor by the side of the bed.

 “You’re one to talk. Besides,” he added and lowered the pillow so it rested just below the cut of his hips. She couldn’t quite stop herself from glancing at the trail of coarse hair leading from his belly button down to his— “this is my house. I’m not the one naked in a bedroom that’s not mine.”

 She gaped at his ass as he turned and strode across the room to the en suite. Just as he reached the door, he tossed the pillow back toward the bed and entered the bathroom naked as the day he was born. Infuriated at his audacity, she snatched the pillow out of the air and caught a glimpse of her left hand.

 In particular, the ring finger on her left hand. Where a ring graced her finger. Two rings. One a small but beautifully cut diamond and the other—oh shit!—a plain gold band. She was wearing a wedding set.

 “What the fuck?”

 “I thought I told you to stop yelling.”

 Stunned, she tore her gaze away from her hand and gawked at the man standing in the doorway, bare chested and bemused with his long, lean legs half-covered in cutoff sweats and crossed at the ankle. He leaned against the door like he was perfectly at ease. That he was, in fact, used to waking up with naked women in his bed every day of the week.

 And maybe he was. She hadn’t seen Playboy Peeta since back in college, but then again, she hadn’t exactly been spending a ton of time with him since they’d graduated.

 “How the hell are you so calm? I have an engagement ring on. I have a wedding band on!”

 “You’re freaking out.”

 “I am! Join me, won’t you?”

 “Now, why would I want to do that?” he asked and sauntered toward her. The way his abdominal muscles shifted under his skin almost distracted her from his left hand, which he lifted to show—

 “Oh my fucking hell.”

 “Looks good on me, doesn’t it?”

 She sputtered, “B-but th-that’s a wedding ring!”

 “You know, I always told people I was going to marry someone really smart, and you, dear wife, just proved me right,” he said as he plunked down on the edge of the mattress next to her and leaned over to kiss the side of her head.

 “What the actual hell?” Katniss spat and shoved him away from her. “Are you high?”

 “Definitely not high, but I might still be a little drunk.” He stood quickly and swayed a little bit. He stopped and steadied himself with hands out for balance. “Nope. Scratch that. Not drunk but definitely hungover.”

 “You’re insane. I mean, I suspected it before, but now it’s confirmed. You are absolutely nuts.”

 “Thanks for your vote of confidence, but I’m not insane. I am, however, your brand-new husband.”

 Katniss narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “Two minutes ago, you didn’t even know why I was here, and now you’re coolly announcing that we’re married. Something doesn’t add up here.”

 “It all came back to me in the bathroom.”

 “You were in there for 45 seconds.”

 “What can I say?” he shrugged and offered an infuriating smile. “Last night was memorable. It didn’t take long for it to all come flooding…”

 He trailed off suggestively, and her mouth fell open. Again. Because seriously. What the fuck?

 “We didn’t do that,” she insisted. “You are disgusting.”

 “Funny. That’s what you said last night right after I cleaned all the, well, you know, off your chest and stomach and from between your legs. You weren’t wrong then either.”

 She started at him, aghast, her mouth hanging open. Memories flickered in erratic flashes, and it wasn’t what she wanted to see. Most were definitely in the vein of what he’d just hinted. Something about him crawling up her body and licking creamy fluid from her belly before moving to her breasts and then devouring her mouth.

 “I’ve got to get out of here. Where the fuck are my clothes?”

 “What?” he asked, mock surprised. “You don’t want your loving spouse to cook you breakfast in bed? It is our honeymoon, after all.”

 She glared at him before biting out, “I. Will. End. You. Where the fuck are my clothes?”

 “You know, if you can’t keep track of your things, maybe you shouldn’t have any.” She raised her face to rip him a new one, but he was dangling her lacy salmon colored tank top from the tips of his long, artistic fingers. She absolutely did not notice the raised veins in his forearms and the size of his palm when she snatched her shirt from him.

 “Can you give me some privacy, please?” she said as primly as possible through her disgust, but he just chuckled and shook his head.

 “You’re priceless. After what we did last night? Playing virginal doesn’t become you, Everdeen.”

 “Yeah, well, if I actually married you, I’m not Everdeen anymore, am I, Mellark?”

 Peeta froze, his eyes wide at her observation, and she took advantage of his surprise to push past him to the relative safety of his bathroom. He didn’t even protest that she’d pulled the sheet from the bed to cover herself when she went.

 A hesitant knock sounded on the door, and she grumbled at him to go away. He repeated his gesture a couple more times before finally growling, “I found the rest of your clothes. At least take them.” She didn’t bother to thank him when she cracked open the door and snatched them from his hand.

 She took her time putting herself back together, long enough for her hands to stop shaking and her heartrate to slow to a slow canter instead of the full-on gallop it had been beating since she woke up next to Peeta Mellark.

 “What the hell happened last night?” she demanded in a harsh whisper. No matter how hard she tried to remember, nothing else came to her for several moments, and then only flashes of a club and the press of bodies and heat and so much alcohol and a really hot man grinding into her on the dance floor. “And this is why you don’t drink more often.”

 When she felt like she had some kind of control over herself, she inched the door open to an empty bedroom. Wadding the sheet into a ball, she tossed it on the bed and scanned the space for her purse and phone and keys. Nothing. They must be in the living room, which meant she couldn’t sneak out the window to avoid seeing that smug bastard.

 She crept down the hall in the direction of what she hoped was the front door. Sounds echoed down the hall, those remarkably like someone cooking, and her stomach grumbled loudly despite her hangover and horror. A sharp sizzle pricked her ears, and she sighed at the scent of freshly brewing coffee and something that smelled distressingly close to thick-cut slices of ham. God, she’d kill for a hunk of cooked pig right now.

 Katniss rounded the corner and glanced furtively around the open room. A small living area, exceptionally neat and beautifully styled, stretched into a chef’s kitchen that held a disheveled, discomfited Peeta with a spatula in one hand and a carton of eggs in the other. When he saw her, he offered a lopsided, apologetic smile.

 “Good morning, officially. I’m making breakfast,” he said and motioned to the barstools on the other side of the island where he was cooking. “It won’t take long.”

 “Oh, uh, ah, I don’t think I can stay,” she stammered and edged to the door by which her purse and shoes sat.

 “Katniss, please,” he asked, suddenly unsure and vulnerable. “I— we—”

 “Very articulate.”

 Peeta had the grace to flush before shoving a riot of blonde curls off his forehead. “Look, Katniss, last night was pretty insane. I agree with that.”

 “Insane, crazy, completely irresponsible, absolutely not what we should have done.”

 Hurt colored his features, and she regretted it for just a second. But then he opened his mouth again.

 “Absolutely what we should have done. We’ve been skirting around each other for years. I, for one, am glad you finally admitted how you feel about me and gave in,” he insisted. “I mean, it’s not what I would have done if we’d been sober, but a quickie elopement is just as good as a big ceremony.”

 She didn’t have words to answer him because, despite understanding every word he said, it seemed like he was speaking a completely different language.

 “Admit how I feel about you?” she scoffed. “I thought that was perfectly clear. I can’t stand you.”

 “That’s not what you said last night.” His tone was stubborn, and his mouth turned down into a frown. “Last night you told me you loved me. That you’ve always loved me since I bought your lunch at the cafeteria that day back in college.”

 “Last night I was blackout drunk! I would have told a monkey I was in love with him.”

 “Katniss,” he started, but she backed away from him.

 “No! I don’t care what you say. I’m not in love with you, and I don’t want to be married to you. We’re not married! Not really. It’s not possible.”

 “But—”

 “Just don’t,” she shouted and grabbed her shoes and purse. “Goodbye, Peeta.”

 And then she was out the door and running. She didn’t really care where. She just needed to be away from those wounded blue eyes and gentle voice that did something to her no matter how much she didn’t want anything to do with Peeta Mellark.

 ****

 The truth was she had loved him at one point. For a brief period during their senior year when she’d given into his charms and slept with him. After he captivated her with his slick words and hooded looks that made way too many other women throw themselves at his feet. She’d been stupid enough to believe him when he told her she was the only one for him, and she’d agreed to be his girlfriend for two deliriously happy months. Until he broke her heart, and she refused to ever speak to him again.

 And it’s not like he hadn’t tried a million times. Peeta had called her, emailed and texted, even shown up on her porch with flowers and some ridiculous present she didn’t give him the satisfaction of opening. She wasn’t going to allow him a chance to hurt her again, not after catching him lip-locked with Cashmere, one of the most beautiful women she’d ever seen. Not even when the woman herself let Katniss know that the kiss had meant nothing to her and that Peeta was still hers if she wanted. Katniss wasn’t going to settle for anybody’s seconds, even if he’d been hers in the first place. Graduation came just a few weeks after that, and she’d managed to avoid him around town in the years since. Now, at twenty-seven, she didn’t care enough about him to notice he seemed to have a different woman with him every time she glimpsed him in public or at an event where their infuriatingly small circle of friends had invited them both.

 God, she must have been hammered to get anywhere near him last night, let alone marrying him and ending up in bed together.

 She was three blocks from his house before she slowed long enough to reach into her purse where, thankfully, her phone rested. Snatching it out, she ignored the notification on her screen and dialed her best friend. When Gale answered, she breathed a sigh of relief.

 “Hey, Catnip,” he greeted her in his deep voice. Amusement echoed over the phone line, and she wanted to smack him.

 “Thank fuck you answered. Where the hell were you last night when I was, apparently, getting plastered and leaving the club with my arch enemy?”

 “You didn’t seem to think he was too bad last night,” Gale laughed, and Katniss almost hung up on him. Unfortunately, she needed to figure out what had happened because she didn’t remember a damn thing that made sense.

 “Seriously, dude. I woke up naked and in bed with him. I wouldn’t do that if I was in my right mind, so tell me what happened. And also, why didn’t you stop me?”

 “Well, shit, Catnip,” her best friend laughed. “You never could resist that guy, but I didn’t think you’d jump into bed with him after one night back together.”

 “Back together?”

 “You really don’t remember anything?”

 “No,” she mumbled, but something pricked at the edge of her memory. Something about running into the back of a stocky, muscular, strong man who she’d leaned into gratefully. He’d been protective when another guy hit on her lewdly, and they’d started talking. Realized they already knew each other. Decided to catch up. Her discomfort at first because…

 Oh god. Because it was Peeta, but she’d been just tipsy enough to be a little forgiving, and he’d looked amazing in his tight green t-shirt that made his skin glow and his eyes tint toward turquoise instead of aqua. And he’s looked so eager and repentant and his smile wide and his touch so gentle and warm.

 “Well, it was entertaining for the rest of us, anyway.”

 “Glad I could make your night better,” she groused. “Now, spill it.”

 “You disappeared for a little while. Thanks for bailing on my birthday, by the way.”

 “Yeah, yeah. I’ll make it up to you,” she snapped.

 “When you didn’t come back, we got worried and went looking for you,” he explained. “Annie went first and couldn’t find you. Then Finnick took a turn and said he’d caught a glimpse of your back at the bar, but you disappeared before he could make his way over to you. So, I went to track you down, and, when I couldn’t find you, Johanna went on the prowl.”

 “Not Jo,” she groaned.

 “Yeah, she found you cuddled up to Mellark in the back room. You were talking in the corner and then kissing and then—”

 “She didn’t know who he was, so she didn’t try to stop me.”

 Gale huffed an irritated sigh. “Jo didn’t stop you because, when she tried, you told her you were getting reacquainted with your former lover and would she please kindly fuck off.”

 “I’m surprised she didn’t bite my head off.”

 “She did, but lover boy stopped her cold. And when he did, you told him to take you home or lose you forever.”

 “I didn’t misquote Top Gun to him,” she insisted. “I wouldn’t disrespect Goose that way.”

 “Apparently, you did, and then you left with him. We tried calling. I would have come and gotten you, but you only answered once, and you were absolutely insistent that you wanted to be with him.”

 “Gale,” she said as patiently as she could, “I was clearly drunk. Maybe not the best time to trust my judgment.”

 “You weren’t drunk.”

 “I woke up hungover!”

 “I paid yours and Peeta’s bar tab. A total of two drinks each.”

 “Then… Oh, good night, nurse,” she gasped. “I remember now.”

 “Well, then fill me in. I wasn’t there for that part of it,” he said, and she could practically hear him roll his eyes.

 “I had a flask in my purse. I stashed it in case you all wanted to stay longer than I wanted to pay for drinks, and I pulled it out and started drinking.” She gulped and groaned, “I came onto him. Asked him to take me to his place. That I wanted to apologize for not listening to him back in college.”

 “And you woke up naked with him? Uh…”

 “No, it wasn’t his fault. I wasn’t that drunk, and he was soooooooo… Dammit, he was so sweet, so apologetic. And then he kissed me.”

 “I don’t really think I need to hear the rest of it, do you?” Gale muttered.

 She snapped her mouth shut. She didn’t need to justify herself or share what had happened between Peeta and her the night before. Suffice it to say that she’d shed her clothes willingly, and they’d both slammed a lot of alcohol.

 “Shit. I’ve got to go.”

 Katniss dropped her phone back in her purse and turned in her tracks. She took a few hurried steps and then ran. She was out of breath by the time she stopped at his stoop, but she knocked while she sucked air into her lungs. It only took a few seconds for him to open the door, and when he did, she wanted to reach for him.

 Hands twitching, she stated, “We’re not really married.”

 “No.”

 “But we slept together.”

 “Well, I didn’t get a lot of sleep—”

 “Peeta!”

 He grinned sheepishly and nodded. “You were kind of insistent about the sex part. I didn’t mind so much.”

 “If I remember correctly, I was very enthusiastic about it.”

 “Yeah.”

 “To be fair, I don’t remember much.” Peeta’s face fell, and she reached out to touch his hand. “But I remember wanting to. It’s the rings that don’t make any sense.”

 He huffed and averted his eyes. Staring over her head at the tree in the front yard, he mumbled, “You wanted to see them. It’s the set I bought when we were in college. I wanted to propose to you, but we’d only been together for a little while. It didn’t matter to me. I already knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, so I bought them and thought I’d bide my time until, until…”

 “Until you kissed Cashmere.” It still hurt to say, regardless of the years that had passed.

 “Until she kissed me,” he protested. “I was telling the truth about that. She came onto me. It surprised the hell out of me, and I was pushing her away when you caught us. I tried telling you that for weeks, but you wouldn’t listen, and then graduation and I didn’t know where you went and—”

 “And I wouldn’t answer any of your attempts to get ahold of me.”

 “Your friends wouldn’t help me, and then I got my job and moved. It wasn’t until I came back last year that I knew how to find you, and you obviously hated me by then. I figured I might as well give up and take what I could get.”

 “That was a lot of women, Peeta.”

 “It might have looked like a lot of women, but none of them held a candle to you. There were so many because none of them got a second date.”

 Katniss wiggled her fingers and then slipped the wedding set off and held them out to him. “You should have these back.”

 His shoulders drooped, and he nodded when she placed them in his palm. He’d already taken his band off. His left hand was bare.

 “If it helps, I thought they looked really good on you,” he said, his voice choked with emotion.

 She smiled gently and took a step off the porch. As she backed away, she called, “Not ready for an engagement, but a date might be nice.”

 His head popped up, and she could see his hopeful gaze from halfway across the yard. “Really?”

 “You free tonight?”

 “Yes!”

 “Let’s try that bar from last night again. This time I’ll introduce you to my friends. 9:00?”

 His smile stretched across his face, and he lifted his fist in triumph.

 “I’ll be there!”

 Katniss turned then and allowed herself a satisfied grin. It wasn’t every day you woke up married and ended up with a date.

#everlarkficexchange #springtime edition 2020 #prompt 63 #everlark fanfiction #everlark #peeta mellark #katniss everdeen #naked hungover and married

[mickstart]

what do you think are some iconic/memorable schumi moments? i just got into f1 and would like to know more about him bc somehow i can’t really find anything like that about him.... just stats which are incredibly impressive but i can’t find anything about how he behaved or just anything about his personality..... thanks <3

:) Hi anon, thank you for unleashing the beast.

Ok I love you for asking me this thank you SO MUCH. Welcome to the circus I’m glad you’re here! Also yeah, Schumi is often talked about in terms of statistics and not as a human, Which is a shame bc like! Schumi is fascinating and the dynamics on the grid in late 90s F1 is so much fun! Also, this is mainly going to be late 90s -> early 2010s stuff bc I was born in 98 so uhhh I didn’t properly witness ANY 90s stuff and had to learn about it.

OK so I got super carried away but I’ve divided this into 3 sections: Drives/races that I think showcase some of his talents, human moments we need to talk about more, and Chaotic Little Bitch moments. The key thing to remember w/ Schumi is that he personally tends to be nice but as soon as you put him in a competition, Bastard Mode activates like a cat’s pupils going wide.

I am so sorry for the following short essay. Also some crashes are briefly mentioned but only ones with absolutely no injuries and there’s no details.

Chaotic Little Bitch Moments

Schumi debuted as a SUBSTITUTE driver for Jordan when one of their drivers was in police custody (yes. really.) The highest a Jordan had qualified all year was 10th and in his DEBUT at SPA, one of the toughest tracks, in the middle of the season, Schumi qualified that Jordan 7th! THEN his clutch failed before the first lap was even complete, but Benetton and Jordan WENT TO COURT to fight each other to sign him for their team before the next race in Monza. He couldn’t debut normally he HAD to cause a scene and set the tone.

The Red Strings of Fate: He qualified 7th, his iconic 7 starred helmet, his first victory next year was ALSO at Spa - his first complete race would be at Monza, Ferrari Holy Ground, and he finished 5th which 👀 1) he was immediately racing with The Greats. 2) Mr 5 Championships With Ferrari.

Winning a race by taking a stop and go penalty on the last lap, crossing the finish line in the pits, and making such a complicated argument about said penalty that in a hearing that was SUPPOSED to be Mclaren protesting the race result the stewards scrapped the entire penalty and the 3 who awarded it handed in their licenses??? Iconic.

Austria 2002 where Rubens was ordered to give the win to Michael. And then Michael fucking made him stand on the top step on the podium like “oh no no no RUBENS deserves this” and made a big SHOW out of it and its like “Michael stop you’re not making it heartwarming you’re making it WORSE Michael STOP” The Tension of germany 2010 podium VS the theatricality of THIS podium.

Team orders were banned because of this which also makes this indirectly responsible for Fernando Is Faster Than You having to be a coded message. You can’t escape him,

Blocking Alonso in Monaco qualifying and then, years later in 2010, overtaking Alonso technically illegally at Monaco (the race was ending under safety car, but the safety car doesn’t lead them over the line it pits and they’d crossed the safety car line and the regulations were NOT specific about the rules) and getting a 20 second penalty bc Damon Hill was a steward. Haunting FERNANDO specifically at Monaco like the ghost of christmas past? Getting a harsh penalty because ANOTHER driver he’d fucked over was a steward? Forcing the FIA to rewrite the rulebook to account for his nonsense when he was in his FOURTIES? I don’t know another chaos king.

Winning the 1995 championship by crashing into Damon Hill, getting AWAY with it for some reason, and then trying to do the same thing in 1997 to Villeneuve, failing to do so and simply rebounding off of him harmlessly, almost COMICALLY, and beaching his own car in a gravel trap at which point the FIA said “I have had ENOUGH of you Wacky Races Man!” and disqualified him from the entire championship

Forcing Mika off the track so bad at Spa 2000 that Mika realized the only way he was gonna be able to get past him was to re-invent the overtake and go for it whilst they were passing a backmarker. (The overtake itself is at 2:05 in the video but the build up to it is Important bc the key part it’s not just badass, it only happened bc Mika knew who he was dealing with.)

Spa 1998 was a Ridiculously Chaotic race it truly was the Mugello 2020 of its year, and after a crash at the start that took out almost the entire grid Schumi accidentally collided with Coulthard later in the race. (The teams used to have a spare car at every race then, so the race was able to continue after a restart.) This wasn’t a racing thing, Coulthard was getting lapped. So something in Schumi SNAPS, and he storms down the pitlane and tries to fight Coulthard while the mclaren and ferrari mechanics both hold him back and finally drag him away. He projected into the future, saw Coulthard was gonna talk non-stop shit about Seb, and acted accordingly.

Monaco 2012 Pole don’t talk to me about this I still can’t believe the audacity of this man to get the only pole of his comeback, at MONACO, at the ONE RACE where he had a 5 place grid penalty to take!!

In general, I know Cheating Bad but. I HAVE to admire the brainpower it must take to have the rulebook so memorized that whilst driving an F1 car Schumi could spot a loophole the size of the eye of a needle and then dance through it, forcing the FIA to add ANOTHER page to the rule book specially for him bc nobody else even REALISED that loophole existed.

Human Moments

A quick rant about Mika and Schumi’s entire friendship. After Spa 2000 Mika goes up to Michael, says something like “Don’t ever do that again” then they’re friends again. They had this mutual understanding that Racing was not Reality. This goes all the way back to their F3 days they were rivals AND friends for their entire career. They truly were the Sewis of the era if Sebastian was like 50% more evil. Their entire dynamic is “You’re the only motherfucker in this pit lane who can handle me”. Schumi would do some bullshit and every other driver would throw up their hands in frustration and Mika would just go “Okay” and drive better to put him in his place bc he was the only one who could keep up, and Schumi very visibly LOVED that he’s grinning after Mika owns his entire ass with that overtake at Spa. They were unstoppable force meets immovable object and I’m so sad their rivalry isn’t more talked about bc the way Mika is the only driver who can get him to behave like a normal human being is SO entertaining.

This is a sad one so I won’t link it but he started crying in the 2000 Monza press-conference with his brother and Mika when he equaled one of Senna’s records. The press kept trying to ask questions about it and Mika just has this death grip on his shoulder and tries to get them to stop or let them take a break and it’s so sad but also important to know about.

Once said he didn’t want Mick to race in F1 bc the pressure of his name would put Mick under so much stress and he wanted his son to be happy. (He fully supported Mick in his endeavors! But only after making absolutely sure it was what Mick wanted, and making sure he knew he could just race for fun if he wanted and it didn’t have to be F1)

This whole interview just after Mick was born with the Schumacher family. Special shout out to Gina on his head the entire video and also Corinna talking to the press while Michael is captivated by Mick. Me too Michael.

Once allegedly pleaded to take a stray kitten home from the track?

I reblogged this yesterday but. Sticking like glue to Sebastian at an F1 test and immediately being like “This is my new son he’s gonna go far”. There’s a lot of pictures out there also of Michael being a guest at the karting races Seb went to as a kid and baby Seb visibly losing his fucking mind at being given a trophy by his idol. Every day of my life I think about him trying to ruffle Seb’s hair through his helmet at Brazil 2012

WInning the championship in 2000. Him thanking the entire team individually and pausing mid-celebration to kiss his wife Corinna so tenderly it’s in the F1 opening. Also, the way it literally cuts from the rest of McLaren looking like they’re attending a funeral to Mika grinning at him and hugging him fucking SENDSSSSS me.

Schumi was a little shit in all the 2010-12 press conferences like, lowering Lewis’ chair, playing with a microphone wire, but ESPECIALLY corrupting baby Seb and getting him to mess with Nico Rosberg.

He’s just GOOFY! Like I refuse to let him be remembered as a terrifying force of nature he was so goofy kind of similarly to Seb. PLEASE watch this incredibly awkward interview he did with Coulthard on a golf buggy where they both had to pretend they hadn’t thought about murdering each other at least once. I think Sky F1 should force Brocedes to do this when covid’s over. “Do you mind if I drive?” “Yes.”

EDIT: I CANNOT BELIEVE I forgot the 1999 Canada press conference where Eddie Irvine and Mika Hakkinen get into a water fight and Schumi immediately grabs a towel and hides behind it and is like “I had NOTHING to do with it” 🥺 adorable, actually

A lot of people at Ferrari, including Rob Smedley (who was on the other side of the garage with Felipe Massa so not in his inner circle) have said that a lot of the success of the team came from Schumi’s LEADERSHIP more than anything, that he’d make the team get together to bond all the time. When Schumi moved to Ferrari in 1996 they were NOT dominant. He did the same thing Lewis did - went to a team that everybody said would be a huge mistake and helped build them up behind the scenes.

THIS bit of the Canada 2011 Rewind where his engineer gives him the strategy and he’s like “... OkaAaAaAay?” and then when it turns out to be the wrong strategy he cheerfully tells them it’s too late. Little shit.

Speaking of Mercedes I also wanna say that like. They were a MESS in 2012 and his car DNF’d because of a failing on their part MULTIPLE times. (In Canada qualifying his DRS was stuck open and they couldn’t close it.) He did not say a single bad word about them EVER even though the press used this to attack him non-stop as washed-up and bad without Ferrari to cheat for him. At Ferrari he was the exact same with the team, any bastard antics Schumi had for his rivals did not extend to the engineers and crew.

OK this one is soured bc Top Gear is trash BUT if you were like, a kid in England who followed motorsports? Schumi’s fake reveal as The Stig on Top Gear was like the coolest, sickest thing,

Please view this image of Schumi and Mika when they were young and stupid

Iconic Races

ok so I have limited myself to a few races that show off some of his key strengths!

Hungary 1998 / France 2004 - STRATEGY/SPEED - Schumi switched to a 3 stop strategy in 98 and a FOUR STOP strategy in 04 and won both races. In order for the strategy call to work he’d have to basically make every single lap a qualifying style ‘flying lap’ and you best fucking believe he DID THAT. God I fucking miss when Ferrari was the king of strategy.

Argentina 1998 -  has it all. Talent, battling Mika, pit lane mind games with mclaren, and bullying coulthard xxx

Spain 1996 / a majority of the wet races - RAIN - One of Schumi’s nicknames was Rain Master bc he was so fucking good in the wet. If it started raining and you were a Schumi stan you were cackling evilly before the red lights even went out. I single out 1996 bc it was his first win for Ferrari and it was unexpected but in most wet races, even Canada 2011 post comeback, you can see Schumi thriving.

Malaysia 1999 - Schumi missed pretty much the entire second half of the season with a broken leg, came back for the last 2 races with everybody murmuring about whether he would struggle, and immediately put the Ferrari on pole. Also worth noting is that he was the number 2 driver for these 2 races bc his teammate Irvine was fighting Mika for the championship and he went along with that without complaint, allowing Ferrari to win the constructor’s championship if not the driver’s.

Monza 2002, 03, 04, or 06 just because it has the energy of the tifosi kneeling at the feet of an idol to their red god.

Brazil 2006 - Fuck All Y’all - Schumi’s last race for Ferrari. He got a puncture and ended up almost lapped, and then drove his way back from that to 4th bc he couldn’t go out without reminding us he’s a bad bitch.

Monza 2012 - Defending - Don’t tell F1 Twitter that there’s actual footage of Lewis and Michael having a genuine lengthy battle on track but DO watch Michael defending like a motherfucker and Lewis breathing down his neck for half the race we need to talk about this more.

Valencia 2012 - This isn’t necessarily anything special but I cried in my living room over the only podium of his comeback so it goes on here. It doesn’t have the same impact if you haven’t been watching him struggle with the car for years, DNF-ing from car failure most of 2012, and having BBC F1 telling you he’s washed up every single weekend, but you can just enjoy one of the best drives of FERNANDO’S entire career as he DRAGS that Ferrari by its hair to a home grand prix win and then watch the crowds embrace him like jesus and also Schumi being happy on the podium. Also, the very start of this clip from the press conference: him forgetting what language he’s supposed to be speaking 

Basically, Schumi was a hyper-competitive ambitious bitch who turned into a goofball as soon as he switched the engine off. This is by NO MEANS everything if I was making an exhaustive best races guide I’d do more research and another post but I hope this is what you were looking for?? THANK YOU SO MUCH for letting me go MAXIMUM SPECIAL INTEREST and I apologize.

#asks #Schumi #Mika #Alonso #long post #god I'm so fucking sorry #Anonymous #This is not comprehensive bc I didn't want to accidentally turn this into a whole research project especially if you're new to it!

[marisair]

welcome aboard, marisa irigaray, student #14. we are excited to set sail with you ! has anyone told you that you look like macarena achaga? according to our records, you hail from montevideo, uruguay, prefer she/her, are cis female, and are here to study philosophy. we also see you received a spot on the ss university because of your academic scholarship — we won’t tell anyone. during your first few weeks here, other students said you were + confident, + independent, but also - deceiving. it sounds like you spend most of your time at the sun deck. upon checking your luggage, we noticed you packed a necklace brought from home. hopefully your roommates don’t steal it!

                                    STATS / / PINTEREST

hey there! i’m ella (she/her, cst) and i’m so excited to play marisa because she’s a character i’ve had in my mind for a while so this is very exciting for me. if you’d like to plot, please feel free to message me or ask for my discord if you prefer.

basic information

FULL NAME:  Maria Isabel Irigaray Monroy

NICKNAME:  Marisa

AGE:  Twenty-three

DATE OF BIRTH:  November 12, 1997

PLACE OF BIRTH:  Montevideo, Uruguay

GENDER:  Cis Female

PRONOUNS:  She/her

SEXUAL ORIENTATION:  Bisexual

ROMANTIC ORIENTATION:  Demiromantic

LANGUAGES: Spanish and English

OCCUPATION:  Philosophy student

character inspo

alexis rose (schitt’s creek)

marissa cooper (the oc)

haley dunphy (modern family)

regina george (mean girls)

catherine earnshaw (wuthering heights)

background

Born in Montevideo, Uruguay, Marisa always believed she was destined for more than what she had which was not a lot. 

For the first five years of her life, Marisa knew what being part of the 1% was like. Her family had several businesses but that all changed in 2002 when the economic crisis hit Uruguay. 

After her family lost pretty much everything, the Irigarays had to settle with a humble lifestyle which was not ideal for her mother, Isabela (who had married Carlos Irigaray because of his fortune).  

From a young age, Marisa was told by her mother that she would be the one that would bring prestige and wealth back to their family name.

cheating tw Isabela tried everything from pushing both of her daughters into modeling and acting to cheating on her husband with wealthy man who would only give her expensive presents but nothing more. 

A smart child, Marisa always got scholarships intro private schools and that only increased her need for money. She hated being the girl with the scholarship, not being able to invite her friends over because she felt ashamed of her small house that have no comparison with their mansions. 

When she got into a prestigious high school, she decided to pretend. Told everyone that while her father’s company had gone bankrupt they still had a lot of family money and that her father now was a big executive for a bank. She dressed with designer brands, clothes and accessories that friends from her previous school had given to her.

It all seemed to work until her final year when a girl jealous of her found out she’d been lying and exposed her in front of the whole school.

For the next months, she was relegated and mocked for lying. The biggest humiliation in her life. 

After graduation, she got a scholarship for a private school but opted to skip it because she couldn’t handle the rejection again. She enrolled into a public university and for some time she was happy until her greed came back.

She started dating a man 10 years older than her who had a lot money. There was no love between them, she liked the lifestyle he gave her and he liked showing her off. It was a silent agreement. 

Marisa dropped out to be with him all the time but after two years he kicked her out of his life, and broke the news that he was engaged and that while she was great she was not good wife material.

Without a plan, Marisa decided to go back to school and this time she was told by her mother of a new experimental educational program. Without anything to lose, she applied for a scholarships and she was granted it.

But old habits die hard and once again Marisa began lying about her background, saying her father was a wealthy banker and that she was on the ship on a scholarship because she wanted to prove herself. 

personality

Marisa is independent, beautiful, spoiled, arrogant and temperamental. She craves freedom in every respect, but, whether out of fear or simply selfishness, she makes decisions that she herself knows will make her unhappy, but that she still carries out. She always emotional and not very rational. She’s often torn between being herself and her social ambition. She can be cruel and mean but beneath this exterior she’s very insecure and craves true connection. Marisa is very smart but she often plays dumb because it’s what people expect from her. As a friend, she’s loyal and will do anything to protect those she cares for.

established connections

bffs with aurora cunningham

one night stand of lacey hamilton

bully of luna hendrix

wanted connections

confidant: this person is the only one who knows the true about Marisa and for some reason they have agreed to keep her secret. 

crush: I would love for Marisa to have a crush on someone who is not her type and she just hides it as if it was a state secret.

fwb: she’s bisexual

ex: good terms or bad terms

pen pal: someone she wrote with before coming to the ship

** i can’t think of any other lmao but pls plot with us

#seasintro #cheating tw #this is not perfect but it's what i have #come plot with us

[spencers-renaissance]

Pull Me Out of the Glowing Stream

Summary: Spencer develops bacterial meningitis and Hotch sort of forgets how to breathe

Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Protective Hotch, Spencer Reid Whump, Major Illness, Angst, Fluff, Medical Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending

Pairing: Gen, Paternal Hotch

Word Count: 3.8k

Read on AO3

A grotty police department in rural Illinois was really not the time and place for Spencer’s body to decide to have a minor breakdown, but really, what was he expecting at this point? For things to go right for once? 

It’s the kind of headache not even two paracetamol and a cup of coffee can shift and he sort of feels like his head might split in two. Not ideal when he had a complicated geographical profile to work up to help the team locate an enraged killer who was flitting between various small towns in the northwest corner of the state. 

“Spencer?”

He’s shaken out of his depressing thoughts by Derek’s slightly concerned voice, causing him to pull his hands away from his head and force himself from squinting against the light. He’d felt fine this morning and he can’t really put his finger on what exactly is wrong besides the headache he just feels… off.

If he can help it though, Derek will most definitely not find out. His coworkers don’t need to think he’s anymore weak than they already do. 

“Sorry,” Spencer says, feigning a weak smile. “Didn’t get much sleep last night.” 

Derek doesn’t look completely convinced, but he nods anyway. “JJ and I are headed to interview the most recent victim’s family but Rossi and Blake will be back from the ME’s office shortly. Hotch is just in the break room talking to some LEOs, alright?” he says, grabbing his leather jacket from the back of one of the chairs. “See you in a bit, Spencer.”

Spencer has to stop himself from physically falling on the floor and rolling into a protective ball as soon as Derek leaves the room. He’s so exhausted and in so much pain, the last thing he wants to do is gather around the table and have to propose valuable theories about the case to build the profile. He just feels like such an outsider sometimes, and it’s been even worse recently. He’s felt himself withdraw from the group, sheltering himself from the prying glances and teasing comments, but he just can’t help it; he doesn’t even know why, really. 

Honestly, he’s desperate to crawl back to the hotel room and bury himself under the covers and never resurface again, but he can’t. The only time he really feels valuable is when he’s working, when he’s tangibly contributing to solving the case, and he can’t sacrifice that for a little head cold or whatever’s going on. Besides, nobody needs to hear him whinge about his stupid problems. Everyone has enough to deal with without him as an added burden.

Hotch is shooting him concerned looks and it’s only making him feel worse. He really doesn’t need to be berating himself for making his team members worry on top of already feeling at death’s door. The real problem, however, is that it’s only getting worse. He’s struggling to concentrate and feels hot under the collar, and it’s getting harder and harder to ignore the swirling nausea in his tummy. But his health cannot be the priority right now and surely Hotch must realise that: there’s a killer on the loose and he knows that he can be an immensely useful resource, headache be damned. 

Focus. He tries to look back towards the board -- he knows there’s something in one of the pictures that’s not quite right, not that he can remember which one or what it was -- but his neck protests as he tries to move it, stiffening up in response to the pain. Keeping his head down instead, staring at the case file he has open on the desk in front of him, he notices his pen quivering a little in his hand as it shakes. His glance upwards to check if anyone saw is immediately met by Hotch, whose muted concern has clearly morphed into full-blown distress, and he quickly looks away. 

“Spencer?” Hotch says gently, trying not to attract the attention of the other team members who are quietly discussing the case at the other end of the table. 

It’s the jerk of his head to look back up at him that does it. He feels his head loll and his stomach drop out from under him, nausea pouring into his insides as his eyes lose their focus. “I’m sorry,” he mumbles, though it comes out far too slurred to be intelligible, and everything fades to black. 

★

Hotch is pretty sure his heart stops beating for a moment as he watches Spencer slump forward in his chair, falling to the side a little as his muscles give in to what’s clearly been plaguing him all day. The others snap out of their conversation fast, Alex rushing to his side. “Spencer?” she asks, voice insistent and full of anxiety. “Spencer, wake up, come on.” She pauses to press two fingers to his pulse point as her other hand feels his forehead before looking Hotch in the eyes, urgency filling her voice. “His pulse is weak and he has a serious fever.”

“Call an ambulance and explain what’s going on,” Hotch says, feeling the colour leave his face as he takes in the situation. “Dave, I need you, Derek and JJ to carry on working the case, Blake and I will go to the hospital with Spencer.”

The paramedics arrive quickly, by which time everyone in the PD is nosily peering through the windows, eager to watch the macabre theatrics of a medical emergency. Hotch backs away from where he’d crouched to hold Spencer’s hand, as does Blake and Spencer is quickly hooked up to the portable monitor. Hotch didn’t miss the grave glance that was shared between the two of them; he’d given and received enough of them in the course of his career to know they meant not good.

“Blake, you drive behind,” he murmurs softly as he watches an oxygen mask be placed over Spencer’s nose and mouth. “I’m riding with.” 

He hasn’t felt so sick to his stomach since he was driving to his own house to meet his wife’s dead body, and God, did he absolutely not miss the feeling. Spencer’s hand is freezing cold, and he’s still shaking slightly through the deep slumber that has overtaken his body, though luckily he’s stable enough that the paramedics don’t seem to be able to do a lot more for him until he is admitted to the ER. 

Seeing Spencer lie so small and frail under all the wires as he’s jolted about slightly by the ambulance’s fast pace cuts deep into an area of his heart he usually keeps so closely guarded, reserved for moments with his son and the grief that lingers cold and heavy from Haley’s death. Spencer is family: he’s watching the man he considers a son teeter far too close to the edge of death, and all he can do is remind himself how to breathe. 

“Hang in there, Spencer,” he whispers, gently pulling the cold hand he’s holding to his face and holding it there a moment. “You’re going to be okay.” He has to be.

The nearest hospital is thankfully close, and Hotch sends up a prayer of thanks that they were sent to a city and not on a rural, buttfuck nowhere case. The paramedics waste no time wheeling Spencer’s gurney into the ER, reeling off his stats in code Hotch couldn’t hope to understand to the awaiting doctors, admitted immediately for further tests to establish treatment while he’s steered by a patient nurse to a quiet waiting area. 

Alex rushes in less than five minutes later, filling with relief when she clocked Hotch sitting in the corner. “Any news?” she asks, cautiously optimistic. 

Hotch grimaces in response. “No, he was only just admitted,” he sighs, emotion creeping into his face in a way he usually staves off at work. A hurt Spencer Reid warrants that much, at least. “He was stable in the ambulance, though. They’re running tests now for a diagnosis.” He looks down at his clasped hands. “I should have noticed it sooner.”

Alex sits down next to him slowly and sighs. “There’s no use in blaming yourself,” she says gently. “Spencer wouldn’t want that. We all could’ve picked up on the signs sooner or been more persistent in asking what was wrong, you’re not in the wrong here. Hindsight, as they say, is 20/20.”

“I know,” Hotch says eventually. “I just feel so responsible for him. He’s still so young and has so much in front of him, if-- if something happened to him, I’d never forgive myself.” 

“Yeah,” Alex whispers, pressing her lips together. “None of us would.”

“I just couldn’t live in a world where Spencer doesn’t exist.” His voice chokes off as the dam breaks and he cries quietly into his hands, pain blossoming in his chest as the thought of Spencer dying and the crushing agony of muffled sobs collide. 

“Oh, Hotch,” Alex murmurs sympathetically as she watches her boss crumble in front of her. “No-one’s told us to prepare for Spencer dying, okay? You said yourself that he was stable in the ambulance and aside from a thready pulse and a fever we don’t know anything else about his physical state. Don’t torture yourself with a future that frankly looks unlikely as of now, it’s not worth it.” 

Hotch nods, taking a deep if shaky breath in and wiping his eyes one last time, looking back at Alex. “I’m sorry for panicking.”

“Don’t apologise,” she dismisses him gently. “It’s a scary situation, and Spencer is like a son to you.”

“This must be even harder for you,” he says, looking up and meeting her eyes. “I should have stayed stronger for you as well as Spencer.”

“Please,” Alex scoffs. “We all have our ways of coping. Ethan died a long time ago and although the grief I feel for him is like glitter I can’t brush away, I’ve learned how to move forward with my life, carrying that gorgeous shimmer with me.”

They share a small smile over that, and Hotch pats her upper arm with his hand softly before patting his knees and standing up. “I’m going to step outside to call Dave,” he says, a new resolve and determination finding its way into his voice. “I expect that it might be a while, but find me immediately if anything happens, I’ll be just outside the entrance.”

“Aaron?” Dave asks, voice a little tinny and muffled down the phone, swept away slightly by the midwest wind. “How’s Spencer?”

“Not sure yet,” he replies, voice grim. “He was admitted immediately for tests but he was relatively okay the last time I saw him, I think. Alex is here now, and we’ll keep looking over the files while we wait, seeing if we can build on the profile. Ring me with any developments, alright?” 

“Yeah, no problem,” Dave says. “Morgan and I have come to follow a lead we got on a possible associate, and I’ll give you a ring when we leave. Sit tight and give my love to the kid when you see him, Aaron.”

They don’t have to sit in vigil for long before a middle-aged doctor calls Spencer’s name in the waiting room. “Unfortunately, Spencer has bacterial meningitis,” she explains gently as soon as they approach her. “It’s been caught relatively early so his chances are good, but this is a serious disease that needs to be monitored closely so he’s been moved to the ICU. He had a seizure shortly after the lumbar puncture we performed which is a sign of an escalation, but we’ve adjusted his meds accordingly and I can assure you he’s getting the best treatment possible. The ICU is limited to one visitor at a time, but you can see him now; he’s awake though a little drowsy.”

Alex smiles at him and ushers him forward while she goes to sit back down without a word, leaving Hotch to follow the doctor. He wishes desperately to have Spencer walking next to him, rapidly reeling off statistics and fast facts about the disease, because he feels a little in the dark, here. All he remembers is that bacterial is the most serious manifestation of meningitis and it has a high fatality rate. The same heavy sickness from the ambulance sinks deeper into his stomach, weighing him down. Spencer could die. 

He looks small on the hospital bed. It’s such a cliche but it’s true, his already small frame and the spacious bed combined with his pale face and outfit of wires make him look so tiny and all Hotch wants to do is climb into bed with him and wrap him in a protective hug and never let him go. 

“Hotch?” Spencer murmurs as he approaches the bed, smiling gratefully at the doctor before she leaves them to it. 

“Yeah, Spencer, it’s me,” he says gently, sitting down in the chair next to the bed and scooching it as close as possible. “How are you holding up?”

“Hurts,” he says, voice weak. “A lot. Bacteria sucks.”

“It does,” Hotch chuckles. “It definitely sucks. Big time. I’m sorry this is happening, Spencer. And I’m sorry we didn’t catch on to you sooner and get you here faster.”

“Please,” he laughs, wincing a bit as the movement settles an ache deeper into his muscles. “I wouldn’t have let you. I can be a little stubborn.” 

Spencer’s voice is slurred slightly but the relief settling into Hotch’s bones at how lucid he is feels almost euphoric. “You’re definitely stubborn,” he says fondly, caressing Spencer’s hand with his thumb. “Our stubborn little mule.” 

“Not little,” he pouts in response, eyes drooping slowly closed.

“No,” he reassures him. “You’re not little. You’re strong, and you’re going to fight this, Spencer.”

“Yeah,” Spencer mumbles. “Fight it. Hotch… stay with me?”

“I’ll stay as long as they’ll let me stay, Angel.”

“Angel,” Spencer whispers, a happy smile playing on his lips as he finally gives in to the sleep tugging at his body. 

★

It takes Spencer another three and a half days before he’s awake for more than a few minutes at a time and satisfactorily lucid. Thankfully, the anticonvulsants had staved off another seizure and his temperature was slowly but surely dropping as his body fought off the infection, aided by the intravenous antibiotics being steadily dripped into his bloodstream. His oxygen mask had been swapped for a nasal cannula and he was no longer trembling. 

Hotch spends the majority of visiting hours sitting beside his bed, texting or phoning the team while working as many angles as he could with only a laptop and the case files Alex is bringing him, but it seems so trivial everytime he looks up and Spencer is lying there looking small and peaceful as he sleeps, meningitis ravishing his body. He’d been worried for the first day at how much Spencer was sleeping, but a kind nurse explained that it was normal; his body was just fighting off a brutal infection and could do that best when he was asleep. Now it just makes him happy to see him dreaming away, knowing that his body is doing the best to help him get better.

He’d tried to avoid googling ‘bacterial meningitis’, but he gave up on the second day and scrolled through endless sites, torturing himself with statistics and facts and prognoses. It gave him a newfound respect and empathy for Spencer: he knows these about pretty much everything and has to live with them all the time. He knows his own survival chances very well, can probably recite specific cases and studies and has no escape at all. 

Spencer manages to sit up on the third day and Hotch pulls out a portable chess board that Dave had gone out and bought specifically for this moment. 

“You play?” Spencer asks sceptically, raising his eyebrows.

“I’ve dabbled,” Hotch replies lightly, a smile playing over his lips as he takes in Spencer’s doubtful but eager expression.

“I’ll probably win in under twenty moves,” Spencer challenges, matching Hotch’s smile. 

“Oh, I don’t doubt that,” Hotch chuckles. “But I’ll put myself through it anyway.” 

Spencer stays true to his word and wins in 17 moves, making Hotch throw his hands up and lean back in his chair, smiling at the other man before packing the board back away. Spencer looks miles healthier, the antibiotics clearly starting to do the trick, but he’s still seriously fatigued and shuffles down the bed to lean his head back and relax a bit more, sitting up for a few minutes tiring him out. 

Hotch pauses for a moment before deciding to broach the subject. “Spencer,” he starts softly, meeting the man’s hazy gaze, “why didn’t you say anything to us sooner? You clearly had a crashing headache, muscle pain, nausea. You said you felt the fever come on. You could have said something sooner and I would have helped you. Your health should come before a case.”

Spencer closes his eyes in shame for a moment, a blush blooming over his cheeks as he looks back to Hotch. “I’m sorry, I just-- It was a grisly case and I thought that was the most important thing, I guess. I’m no use stuck in a sick bed. I just felt bad making everything about me when in the grand scheme of things, a headache is pretty menial. Felt… isolated, maybe.”

“Oh, Spence,” Hotch says sympathetically, reaching back over to grip Spencer’s hand in both of his. “This is really serious, okay? If we’d left it much later or you hadn’t passed out but continued to suffer in silence, you could have died.” He has to pause for a moment as he chokes on the word. “Missing one case and being better for hundreds more is better than working yourself to the bone on this one and then not being around for anymore, isn’t it? You are so valuable, Spencer. Not just your eidetic memory or IQ, you. Spencer Reid is special and loved and important, and I don’t want you to ever think that a case is more important than you, or that we’ll be annoyed by anything that you need to talk to us about. If you ever feel alone, you come and find me and I’ll do my best to banish that feeling, okay?”

“I’m sorry,” Spencer murmurs again. “I guess I just find it hard to believe that people care about me for more than what I can offer them. I never had anyone value me the way you do, and I still struggle to wrap my head around it. I’m sorry for scaring you, but I promise I already feel better. I’m not going anywhere, I promise, Hotch.”

“You’d better not,” he replies, letting himself smile a bit. “I know it’s hard for you to trust us, Spencer, but we’re your family, okay? Any of us would drop anything for you, stubborn little mule.”

Spencer doesn’t correct him this time, opting instead for a wide smile. “Thank you, Aaron,” he whispers intimately. “For being here, I mean. It’s scary on my own and having you next to me makes me feel safe.”

“Good,” Hotch says, smiling at Spencer’s use of his first name. “You’re always safe with me. You should rest now, you’re tired. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

★

Once Spencer’s moved out of the ICU on day five, the team are finally allowed to come and visit him, bringing Penelope, presents and smiles and noise. And reprimands. Many reprimands. 

“If you ever put a case above your own damn health again, it won’t be meningitis you have to worry about but Penelope’s wrath, alright Spence?” JJ scolds as she gives him a gentle hug, though her smile betrays her. Penelope is stood at the foot of his bed trying her best to look scary, but like JJ her eyes are far too soft and relief colours her body language. Plus it’s hard to look domineering in a bright orange floral dress and flowers in your hair. 

“Sorry, Pen, JJ,” he says sheepishly, looking at each of them apologetically. “Bacterial meningitis will definitely teach you to listen to your body.” 

“Well if that’s the only good thing that’s come out of this then so be it,” Penelope says with finality, before she melts away her faux stern look and smiles at him. “Now, we bring you gifts and cookies.” 

He opens each of the presents with the wide, open smile he doesn’t let cross his face very often, feeling deeply loved and cherished by his found family. His hospital room is covered in flowers and chocolates and academic books as well as endless gift bags and wrapping paper by the time he’s finished, and although he’s still in a lot of pain and knows he might never fully recover, in this moment he’s the happiest he’s been in a long time. 

The doctor tells Spencer and Hotch a week and a day after his admittance that he’s been lucky enough to escape relatively unscathed. “You need to look out for any of the long term effects of bacterial meningitis such as concentration issues, hearing loss, visual disturbances, chronic pain etcetera but our tests seem to suggest you’re in the lucky c50% of survivors who escape without a permanent disability and we’d most likely have caught it by now. You need to take it easy for two weeks, make sure you’re resting and drinking plenty of fluids, and if you feel any symptoms coming back or becoming more severe you need to get to a hospital as soon as possible,” she says, handing him the discharge paperwork. 

“Spencer, I think you should come and stay with me for those two weeks, okay? I’ll be there to take care of you and keep you company while you finish recovering. How does that sound?” he asks as Spencer signs the sheet of paper and hands it back to the doctor who smiles at them before turning to leave.

“Are you sure you’re okay with that?” he asks. “I don’t want to impose on you and Jack.”

“Don’t be silly, I’m offering. Besides, Jack will love having his own personal encyclopedia in the house. He loves you.”

Spencer grins widely at that. “Then that sounds like a plan.”

He sleeps for the majority of the two hour flight home, leaning against Hotch’s shoulder buried under the blanket JJ always carries with her in case anyone gets cold while the older man fills in some paperwork for the case they’d wrapped up a few days prior. The gentle noise of his family chatting around the plane and the comforting smell and feel of his protector surrounding him lull him into a sense of safety and reassurance, resting in the knowledge that his family loves him unconditionally. No matter what happens next, even if a long term condition was going to hit him like a ton of bricks, they weren’t going to leave him, and he was valued. Not for his brain, but because he was Spencer Reid, loved and cherished member of the BAU. 

#criminal minds fic #Criminal Minds #criminal minds writing #angst #hotchreid #Spencer Reid #Hurt Spencer Reid #Spencer Reid Whump #my writing

[tams-writeblr]

Once I’m gone

Rating: M(ature)

Warnings: major character death

Category: F/M (main couple), Multi (side characters)

Fandom: Attack on Titan / Shingeki no Kyojin

Relationship: Mikasa Ackermann / Eren Jaeger | various side couples

Characters: Eren Jaeger, Mikasa Ackermann, Armin Arlelt, Zeke Jaeger, Hange Zoe, Floch Forster, Ymir, Reiner Braun, Pieck Finger, Historia Reiss, several others will make a cameo

Additional Tags: Modern AU | established relationship | toxic behaviour | Eren suffers from Huntington’s disease and tries to settle his matters before he dies | suicial blockhead Eren | aged up characters (by ten years) | suicide tw | depression tw | mental diseases tw | deathly diseases tw | this is clearly not write what you know, but I’m giving my very best to representate the topics as good as I can | this all basically came to me as a fever dream | you remember Thirteen from House, M.D.? I still have a huge crush on her so this version of Eren is greatly inspired by her <3

Language: English (not native, I’m trying my best you guys)

Stats: ongoing - Chapter 1/15 - Part 2/4 - 1507 of 3652 words

Summary: Eren Jaeger knew for years that he inherited Huntington’s disease from his late mother. When he first notices symptoms on him, his long protected plan, to end his life before reaching the critical state of his illness,  awakes. But there is still Mikasa, his girlfriend and the only person in the world he cares about more than about himself, and he can’t leave her alone and grieving. It’s time to find a substitute for when Eren is gone. With the help of a new friend Eren tries to scare away Mikasa while driving her into the arms of someone new.

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Charlatans and Pills - Part 2/4

<<previous

“Hey Mama”, the small, dark haired boy said and pulled his hand towards the woman that sat sunk down on an uncomfortable looking chair.

She didn’t directly look at him, only giving his pulled out hand a small, arbitrary glance and looked up towards the man, standing behind Eren.

“But Carla, Dear”, Eren's father said with a cheerful tone. “Shake at least our Eren’s hand. Aren’t you happy that we are visiting you?”

A thin lipped smile crawled over Carla’s face and her light brown eyes finally found Eren’s glance. “Eren”, she sighed recognizing and rather than just taking his hand, she slipped down her chair and tightly hugged him.

Tighter than Eren would have liked it. He looked up to his father, seeking help, insecure how to behave. She still was his mother, the one that always loved him and guessed every wish from his eyes.

Eren had found out that she was sick, three years ago. Back then they also told him, he eventually would get the same sickness. She often dropped things and so she did on his eleventh birthday with a knife to cut his cake. It fell right on her foot and she had to go to the hospital. After this incident, she never returned to her old self. She behaved strangely ever so often, screaming at his dad for obviously no reason.

But the strangest was when Eren came home from school one day. His father was still at work, he had a small practice in the middle of town, and usually a delicious lunch was waiting for him when he returned home from school. But on this day nothing smelled nice through the house, on the contrary it stank horribly of burned food and everything was full with smoke. Eren found his mother in the upstairs bathroom, her hands were dripping with blood, he had found shards in the kitchen.

“What do you want?”, his mother screamed and held her blood stained hands in front of her face. “Get out! I have to hide from the smoke!”

Puzzled Eren neared his mother. “But Mama, you have to turn off the oven or else whatever's on there will burn even more. Did you cut yourself? Do you need a bandaid?”

“Get our!”, Carla yelled again. “Who the hell are you, how did you get into my house?”

Helpless tears wobbled out of big, green child’s eyes. “Mama”, he whined and ducked away under a roll of toilet paper his mother threw at him. Desperately the boy backed out of the bathroom and ran back to the kitchen where he pulled all knobs of the oven until the red control light went off, then he remembered what his father always had hammered inside his little head: to call him at work, when something was wrong with Mum.

“The number is pinned on the fridge”, he had told him again and again. “I’ll be with you within 15 minutes.” If not at this moment, when should he bother his father at work? Quickly the boy looked for the phone around the smoke filled house, luckily he found it in the living room and not like so often in his parents bedroom. He wouldn’t have dared to walk past the upper bathroom in which he still suspected his mother.

His father indeed arrived within minutes. He found Carla beneath the toilet, sunk down and asleep and immediately called an ambulance. “I’m so sorry”, he murmured again and again while pressing the sobbing and crying Eren against him. “You’ll never have to be alone with her again. Everything will be alright.”

His mother didn’t return home after this incident. His father explained to him that she would now live somewhere, where people could look after her more appropriately. There no knife would fall on her food ever again and she wouldn’t burn any more pans.

But Eren found the place where they brought her simply terrifying. There were only old people. Not old people like his father but really old, probably older than his grandparents. It always smelled strangely and scary sounds came from some chambers.

Eren curled out of his mother’s embrace and his father came to help him.

“There, there Carla, not so fiercely”, he laughed and directed her gently back towards her chair. Then he took place across from her and placed a hand on her knee. “Well my Dear, how are you feeling today?”

Carla looked at him for a long time with a stoic face. At that her left arm twitched permanently. It hit against her thigh and the seating of the chair.

Eren watched the movement hypnotized and flinched when his mother took a deep, loud breath.

“Grisha”, she said with unmistakable joy in her voice. her twitching arm raised and her hand landed accurately on her husband’s. A smile crept towards her lips. “My Dear…” Suddenly she was once again his mother, the pretty woman with light brown eyes and dark hair, sun kissed skin and the most beautiful smile in the world.

Eren felt lighter than before and placed his small child’s hand above his mother’s. She only looked at him briefly, out of the corner of her eyes, before taxing Grisha again. The three of them stayed like this for a while in total silence. Only a far away, old and male voice asked when it was finally time for dinner.

The clearing of a throat crushed the family idly and Eren and his mother heavily flinched.

Carla’s head shot high to look at the creator of the noice’s face. Her own one suddenly started to twitch wildly.

“Mr. Jäger, can I please talk to you for a moment?”, a man in a white coat said. From his father Eren knew that doctors dressed like that.

Grisha got up and agreed with a dark look on his face. “Eren, sit down for so long. I’ll be right back.”

“You are a doctor?”, Eren heard the other man ask when he walked away with his father. The latter didn’t answer, maybe he had only nodded. “Then you must know about the condition your wife is in.”

Eren couldn’t hear more from the conversation. But from the look on his mother’s face, he could tell that her glance followed them.

He didn’t want to turn out like her. What was that for a life? Eren still couldn’t quite understand what was wrong with his mother, but he knew she always forgot things, sometimes even him or his father and that she always flapped around her arms. He didn’t want that, especially not the thing with forgetting. Carefully he took her hand between both of his. “I’m not gonna forget you, Mama”, he said tenderly and patted her hand that was gaunt and wiry. “I promise.”

Carla looked at her boy dumbfounded before pulling her eyebrows into a painful grimace. “Oh Eren, my little baby,” she cried and thick tears wobbled out of her eyes. Fragile and smaller as he remembered her she sat on that horribly uncomfortable chair, her hand between the small palms of her son.

Scared by her sudden burst of emotion Eren pulled his hands away. Two faces, so similar to each other that everyone would see their connection, looked at each other with a mixture of horror and hurt.

When his father returned, Eren asked him to leave.

“Come back soon!”, he heard his mother say softly when Grisha leaned down to her and kissed her.

He promised they would, of course he did. And of course they kept their promise. Eren couldn’t say how many hours of his youth he had spent in that foster home that cared for his mother. The doctors and nurses there did a wonderful job, they deeply cared for his mother, who visibly crumpled infront of her small family’s eyes. She got thinner and thinner and ever more erratic. Until she neither recognized Grisha nor Eren. Sometimes she remembered to have a son called Eren but in her memory he was still a ten-years-old that had broken his arm while wrestling with his friends. That the handsome young man infront of her was her small Eren, she wouldn’t get the idea despite their striking resemblance.

Finally her spasticies became so bad that it became too dangerous to let her eat solid food and she got a feeding tube. From this moment on, things went continuously down hill for Carla Jäger, whose husband was a doctor himself who slowly broke down by looking at her.

Almost exactly ten years after moving to the foster home and a little over 13 years after her diagnosis Carla died on a stormy fall evening. She hadn’t seen her son in four month, he just couldn’t take it anymore.

But losing his mother had broken something deep inside of Eren. Now a full grown man, he knew which fate his mother had handed down to him. But he also knew back than, how he would be reacting towards it, when his time came.

                                                                               >>next

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Author’s Note: Hey, thank you for coming back to me! I hope you don’t mind when long flashbacks like this are all in Italics, I know they can be hard to read. Just for Context: Carla was 30 when she had Eren in this story and she dies at 51. Can’t have a main character without a tragic family backstory, can we? See you for the next part!

#attack on titan fanfiction #aot ff #eremika #eren jaeger #carla jaeger #grisha jaeger #once i'm gone #once i'm gone chap 1 #once i'm gone chap 1 part 2 #eren jaeger x mikasa ackerman #grisha jaeger x carla jaeger #writers on tumblr #fanfiction on tumblr #fanfiction #fanfic #writing

[xoxo-nikki-xoxo]

Leverage

Elijah Mikaelson x Arabella Castaway-Mikaelson

Authors note: Okay everyone after much planning and thinking I have come up with my own OC! I can’t wait for us to take this journey together learning about Arabella, like who she is, and how she came to be. Do not be afraid to send in asks about her either!

Word count: 2.4K

Somewhat based off of season 3 of the originals. I also joined the calibration for Dom’s 2 years bioversary. This fic is about sire bonds more importantly them being broken.

@xxwritemeastoryxx

———————————

Being involved in The Original family comes with its up and downs. Especially when it has caused the love of your life to pick his family over well his wife. That was about well two months ago, sense then I have not seen Elijah Mikaelson or his family. It is nothing I can blame them for though, the sad thing is I do not even remember who they are! In fact, it is the vampires I come across on during my travels that bring up The Original family. Usually it goes around the lines someone asking me where they are. From my gathering of these conversations I was married to the one they call honorable, the noble brother, Elijah. It never has set well with me though that my so called “husband” has abandoned me. If we are married is not that meant to be forever, that’s the whole point of getting married is not. Asking to many questions is what got me in this predicament, see what I do remember is my whole life. I remember the life I had New Orleans, the fashion the cooking all of it. So, if I was married to someone back then why is there no piecing pieces?  I barley know anything about this so-called original family, yet their presentence lingers over my body like a shadow. Too afraid to come and say hello, but it’s like every step I take it’s as though I’m being watched.

“Well if it isn’t the myth, the legend Arabella…. how did you find her? Elijah never mentioned why she left or where she went to in the first place” A male’s voice, it was deep with the hint of smoothness. I have no clue what happened, I just remember being at a local cafe in France then my neck was snapped. It went black for a while after that.

“Well we have our ways of getting what we need. When it comes to the leverage we need, this will be perfect. He’ll do anything it takes to keep his precious wife safe… And that well be the way we lure both him and his brother here, so my witches can perform this spell.” it’s a women’s voice, even though I don’t understand what she talking about I don’t want anything to do with it. “I’ll be back later with the items that Davina needs to finish the spell. Be prepared Marcellus, the strixs are all prepared for this battle tonight.” I can hear her shoes click as she walks away from us.

“Davina! Help me take these ropes off her. I can’t touch them, there soaked in vervain. She doesn’t deserve to be in the middle of this. Aya’s only using her to lure Elijah and Klaus here” the man’s voice I can hear must be Marcellus, whoever he is.

“She won’t die today Marcel… she needs to be here to lure Elijah and Klaus here. When they get here, it’ll be easy one of the other witches knock them out.” Davina say as she unties the ropes that are wrapped around my arms and legs. ” she’s safe here Marcel you can leave. When the spell starts you might feel a little warmth, it’ll pass though once the link it gone.” the girl says, and as she says it the blind fold over my eyes gets taken off and so does the duct tape.  

“What if this warmth is the last thing I feel”  

“I’ll be careful”

“I get that Davina and I’m game. But we are on a tight rope with the Mikaelson’s right now. Jackson was a friend to them and us. On top of that we have Arabella too”

“I know Marcel. And I know it’s a long shot, but if I can’t save you, and I can’t save Josh, even Arabella, then I can’t save Kol. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something happened to you guys.” Davina says as she takes of the last of the ropes from my body.

When I open my eyes the man’s gone and the only thing in front of me is a girl looking at me. “You can’t leave, I put up a boundary spell around you… It’s for your protection Bella” The sweet looking girl says to me as she watches me over

“How do you know me?” I asked

“It’s a long story, just know that you’re my friend… I’m Davina, and that guy that was here a couple seconds ago his name is Marcel.” Davina says turning back to the papers that are hanging on the wall.  

“Well it seems like everyone here already knows who I am, so tell me Davina. What is that spell for?”

———-Switch to Elijah———

“And now Aya and her mob of are free to break the sire line. You know, we have made many glorious enemies over the years, brother, but If they sever the link to us, then they well all come for our heads.” Klaus speaks as both of us walk side by side toward the entrance of the compound. This is the very reason why I sent her away, I knew this prophecy was going to be a blood bath. I didn’t need for her to get in the way.

“Not without the white oak brother” I say in a soothing voice as Niklaus stops Infront of me

“Aurora has the last of it” I can the thought swirling in his head, with a smirk forming on my lips I simply say

“Then she dies first”

“You once told me you wanted to use her head as a footstool” titling his head to the side he finished with “why wait”

That’s when my phone vibrates in my coat pocket. I pull it out answering

“Marcel?”

“how”

“Yes, I see” *hangs up the phone*

My face drops looking at Klaus “I don’t know how, but Aya found Arabella. The crescent wolves were able to locate where they are keeping her” I say looking right at Klaus

“Well then let’s get going”

—— back to Arabella—-

“Where is she Aya? Unlike my brother I don’t have the patience to deal with this” the voice is raspy thick sounding as I hear multiple footsteps approaching us.  

“Hello gentlemen, it’s my pleasure you have decided to join us tonight” Aya says, so that is Aya!  

“Let me out of here!!” I yelled getting fed up with being confined into this circle. I bang my fists on the barrier and both the men’s eyes land right on to me.

“How did you-” The man in the suit says his bouncing from mine to Ayas

“It doesn’t matter now that you both are here” Aya says as she stands tall. There two girls that approach them changing some foreign language I don’t recognize. Both men then collapse onto the floor.

“I told you Davina Claire, Arabella Castaway was the key to getting them to come here.” Aya says glancing at me before some body guards drag the two men’s bodies into the water.

“Ive played my part let me out of here!!” I yelled

“You well soon sweet girl, just a few more hours left. Your role to play is still not over yet.” Aya states as she approach’s Davina  

“Were ready to start” Davina stats looking over at Aya

“Then let’s begin”

That’s when all the chanting starts, There’s apart of me deep down that knows this is wrong. This hole I have felt the past 3 months is aching in a way I’ve never felt it do before.  This must be him, the more I think about the faster I put the pieces together. Those are the originals, the one in the suit. He is my husband and even if he did abdomen me years ago I won’t abdomen him now.

I scream banging my fists on the barrier again as the chanting continue. Marcel comes into the room suddenly going up to Aya.

“Any problems?” Marcel asks looking into the pool with the two men, at me, then his eyes land on Davina.

“No, we are nearly there. After today one man’s recklessness will no longer weigh on the shoulders of his sires. Thousands of vampires across the world will be free from the tranny of the originals. I’m glad you’re here Marcel. Stay close by when it happens will you?” Aya says walking up to the pool looking over.

“Why are you guys doing this, I don’t belong here” I scream throwing a fit.

I watch in horror as both the men’s throats are cut then thrown back into the water, the chanting gets louder. And the more chanting I hear is when the barrier drops, I rush the closets witch breaking her back. Another women appears besides marcel killing what looked like to be a body guard

“Marcel!”

“I’m Sorry D. We need to get them out of the water now” Marcel states looking at both us girls. But before anything can happen Davina yells “No” and throws all three of us to the end of the room.  I hear the screams as the man in the suit sits up taking one of the witches’ under water with him. I stand up making eye contact with him as he leaps out of the water.

“I’m so sorry baby… forgive me, Rememoraeri” He says looking into my eyes, and it’s as if the two worlds collided. All my memories come crashing down onto me. But it’s one inparticular that strikes me the hardest. It’s the night I was turned into a vampire

The street was cold underneath my numb body. This wasn’t supposed to happen to me, not like this. I was supposed to live a life, not dying on the side of the road. The loneness of staring up into the sky not being able to move or cry out for help seemed to be the only thing I could look at. I was utterly hopeless as blood pooled up around me. Soon I began choking on the blood stuck in my throat. I wasn’t in any pain no more, it felt more like I was high up in the sky flying.

“No!” I heard him yell he rushed over to my side picking me up biting into his wrist “Drink Bella… please… no-no-no. Not like this… You can’t die like this” I took my last breath Elijah Mikaeslons arms. The last thing I seen was his beautiful brown eyes and the stars glowing behind him. That was in tell I woke up

“Elijah?” I blinked away the memory as I took in his appearance Infront of me. “Whats going on, oh my god-” There where millions of thoughts running through my head

“I well explain later” Elijah says giving me a small smile tucking a random piece of hair behind my ear, that was before we turn, we turned our attention to Davina as she started to break Klaus sire line link

“Davina No!” Marcel shouts, Klaus opens his eyes leaping out Infront of Davina but she catches him with her powers yelling

“No, you’ve had your time!” She shouts throwing him back down into the water, in the process of her doing his she throws all of us down to. We can hear he finishing her spell as Klaus yells. I scream as a warming sensation comes over my body and before I know it, it stops. Elijahs is the first to get up and come to the rescue of Klaus.

I sit up getting into the water with Elijah as well, I move Niks hair out of his face

He is weak but he would never ambit it. “I felt them leave, my sire line is broken” Nik states his voice shaky.  

Elijah and I help Klaus out of the pool “I’ll be in the car soon… I have some unfinished business to attended too.” Elijah says leaving me and Nik in the car.

“You do understand they both have history” Klaus says as he glances at me

“I do, and I tend to end that history right now.” I say excusing myself from the car as I make my way into the building using the back door so I can eavesdrop on the conversation he was having with Aya.  

“So, we remain connected, you and I, in spite of everything that you have done” Elijah says as he twirls a gun around his finger. “I can’t let you hurt my family, my wife. And you can’t hurt me more than you already have” Elijah says looking into Ayas eyes. I can feel and see the hurt and guilt he is holding over himself for hurting Aya. It makes me feel somewhat jealous, but I can’t blame him. He’s lived a thousand plus years; he should have had a few epic loves.  

“I stood by you Elijah. All of us where willing to die for you, and how do you repay us? Betrayal, abandonment.” Aya spits out turning to face his face. She loves him it’s easy to tell, love can be killer.

“You were not forsaken. Yes, I failed you, for this… I will never forgive myself… But I can’t forgive this. You captured my wife!” Elijah yells as he motioned to all the body in the room  

“If your life was chained to a man, who left you despite of your devotion, what choice do I have other than to break free” Aya says this conversation hurts to hear. “ So… End this” Aya says moving as he holds the gun up to her heart. His hand is shaky “End it Elijah!! Or I’ll take that gun and kill you just to be free of you!” She yells tears rolling down her cheek into she grunts, her voice stops her body leans to the side. I stand besides her holding her heart in my hand.  

“So, Elijah tell me why did you decided to erase my memory from ever knowing you?” I ask holding the heart as I look my husband right in the eyes

#elijah mikaelson #elijah mikaelson smut #elijah mikealson imagine #the originals #the vampire diaries #niklaus mikaelson #hayley marshall #rebekah mikaelson #Kol mikaelson #elijah mikaelson x reader #xxwritemeastoryxxturns2

[punksarahreese]

Panic | Reesker |anxious!ava

Content warnings: medical talk (duh), mentions of surgical gore, panic attacks/meltdown, very brief mention of self injury (hitting)

*** 

Doctor Bekker to the ED, Doctor Ava Bekker to the ED immediately

Ava looked up from the chart she was writing just as the PA system and her pager went of simultaneously. She set the tablet down on the nurse’s station, saying a hasty farewell to the CT floor head nurse, and broke off into a sprint. She made it down the stairs in record time, knowing Connor was in surgery so she would be the only CT fellow prepared to take a trauma.

“Maggie?” She asked breathlessly as she came up to the charge nurse, who looked at her in relief.

“Jason Abrams, 35, came in to the ED with shortness of breath and heart palpitations. Passed out during a family reunion and didn’t wake up until he was in the ambo. Wife’s in there with him and half the reunion is taking up space in my waiting room.”

“Heart attack?” Ava questioned as she slid into the treatment room beside April, pulling on her gloves.

“Doesn’t look like it,” she replied, passing Ava her stethoscope, “Take a listen.”

Dr. Bekker nodded and turned to the patient, “Mr. Abrams? I’m doctor Bekker, I’m going to figure out what’s wrong okay?”

The patient gasped out an acknowledgment, clearly struggling to breathe despite the oxygen cannula. April leaned over to check his stats, humming in annoyance at what she saw, “Stats are falling, down to 90%.”

Ava had been listening to the patient’s heart and lungs and met April’s eye, “I’m hearing a murmur, someone get me a 15 lead EKG and a chest X-ray.”

“Right away, Doctor,” Monique replied, attaching the leads to the patient and setting up the machine. While she did that, Ava turned to the patient again.

“Alright, Jason, so I’m hearing a bit of blood splash back in your heart. We’re going to run some tests to confirm what I’m hearing, do you have any history of heart issues?”

Jason shook his head but was unable to respond, his breathing clearly worsening. His wife spoke up from her worried hovering beside his head, “Heart disease... i-it runs in the family but we’ve had no indication of Jace being at risk.”

“Okay, that’s fine,” Ava nodded and took the EKG reading from Monique, “Right, so we’re going to send you up for an echocardiogram, just to get a look at your heart better.”

“Call radiology, let them know we’re taking him up,” Ava said to Monique, watching as the nurse rushed off to make the call.

“Doctor, what’s wrong with him?” The concern in the wife’s voice was apparent and she was fussing over her husband, who had begun to perspire as his lungs worked overtime.

“I can’t be certain without the echo but I believe what I’m hearing is a defect in your husband’s mitral valve. It is sending blood backwards into the heart and that’s causing less oxygen to get through his body.”

“Oh God, my baby,” Mrs. Abrams cried, “What does that mean?”

“I-I uh, won’t know the full extent until we get the test results back, but... if medication doesn’t fix our issue we may be looking at surgery to fix the valve.”

Ava nodded at April, “Push 10 mg of bisoprolol and page me when you get his scan results, please.”

The blonde ducked out of the room and made her way over to Maggie, who was watching the waiting room with a pained look.

“Well?” She asked, “Are you gonna get the Abrams family reunion out of my ED any time soon?”

“Sounds like mitral regurge to me, Maggie. Might be a while, especially if he needs surgery.”

“Of course,” the nurse sighed, “Alright, let me know.”

“Will do,” with that Ava took off to locate a tablet to add to his chart. She snagged one off the nurses’ station and logged in, charting the course of treatment given. She planned to go back upstairs and meet them in radiology, walking as she noted the enlarged chamber on the EKG. She didn’t even notice she had gotten in the way until she had collided with someone while trying to get on the elevator.

“Woah, will you watch-“ she began to say but stopped herself when she realized who it was, “Oh, sorry, Reese cup.”

Sarah Reese stood in front of her in all her glory, eyebrow raised at the immediate tone change and nickname, “That was a whole 180, Dr. Bekker.”

“Oh hush,” Ava sighed, “You know I didn’t mean it.”

“Only because it was me,” Sarah remarked with a chuckle, “Anyone else and you would have snapped enough to make them cry.”

“You know me that well, do you?”

“Well I’d hope so,” Sarah’s hand had snuck it’s way to her wrist as she responded to the quip, “Busy?”

“Checking my pulse? What’s your diagnosis, Doctor?” Ava teased lightly.

“Hm, heart rate of 100, cheeks flushed and breathing uneven,” Sarah stated factually, “Either you’re nervous or you’ve been running, and you hate running.”

“You caught me,” Ava laughed, “Was in the ED.”

“Ah,” the psych resident nodded and kept hold of the older woman’s wrist, tugging her around the corner to a quieter part of the hallway. She saw Ava was about to protest and held up a hand.

“Shh, humour me, Ava.”

Noting the stern look the other woman gave her, Ava sighed in digression, gesturing for her to go on.

“Is the ED still making you that nervous?”

“I’m just not used to the hustle of it,” Ava sighed, “It’s not a big deal, Reese cup.”

“You sure?”

She nodded, “I’m a CT surgeon, love, I’m not made for the chaos Maggie runs down here.”

Sarah’s cheeks flushed a little at the pet name, though she knew well enough that Ava pulled that card simply to win her over.

“I promise I’m fine,” she continued, a smile playing on her lips at the other woman’s worry.

“You have your earplugs if you need them?”

Ava nodded, patting her scrub pocket. She often got overwhelmed by too much noise at once, a symptom of her newly diagnosed sensory issues, so earplugs helped her stay calm.

“I’ll be okay, Sarah,” Ava promised again, “But I really need to get up to radiology.”

The resident nodded, “Okay, don’t let me keep you.”

Ava saw the little spark of regret in the younger woman’s eyes, knew she felt insecure with her forwardness and was afraid she had pushed her too far. Ava’s anxiety about the emergency department and patient interaction was a sensitive topic, but Reese was too curious for her own good.

“Hey,” Ava grabbed her hand and gave it a light squeeze, “Thank you for caring. Coffee later?”

Sarah smiled a little and nodded, “Yeah.”

“Great,” a mischievous grin and then a quick kiss was pressed to her cheek, “See you, Reese cup.”

“Ava!” The brunette was left standing in the hallway with bright red cheeks, making the other doctor laugh as she went back to the elevator.

The surgeon still had a grin on her face as she made it onto the elevator. She couldn’t help but feel giddy around Sarah, something about her just made the hospital feel 100 times safer. Their relationship started off as merely occupational, speaking when patient cases crossed or in passing around the hospital. They got along fine, of course, but Ava was up in CT way more than in the emergency department, so their paths didn’t cross often. This changed when one day Ava had a bad case, when she lost that instrument inside the patient’s heart.

She had a panic attack, rushed out of the operating room and leaving Connor to close the patient. He had stormed into the locker room, starting to yell at her, but stopped when he saw the state Ava was in. She was clearly shaking, cheeks streaked with tears and makeup. He tried to talk her down but she wouldn’t listen, didn’t want his pity, especially not after he had been a major ass all day.

Eventually Connor gave up, leaving the room with a dramatic sigh. Ava had immediately dropped to the floor when the door closed, slumping against a locker as she sobbed quietly. She didn’t want to act like this, didn’t want to be so dramatic when they saved the patient, but she couldn’t help it. What if they hadn’t saved him? What if they missed the instrument and had closed him up? She had let down Connor and Dr. Latham, but mostly, she let down herself.

Ava hastily wiped away her tears when she heard a knock at the door, cursing her anxiety for making her act like such a baby. She tried to put on a brave face but stayed slumped down, letting her hair hide her for the most part.

“Doctor Bekker?” Sarah had come around the corner, “Doctor Rhodes said you were panicking. Are you okay?”

“J-just like him,” the blonde scoffed, “Goes and tells people about my mistake and calls psych on me? Of course.”

Sarah just sighed, crouching down in front of the older woman, “Are you okay?”

“Oh I’m peachy keen, Doctor Reese,” she replied sarcastically through her tears. It’s not that she wanted to be mean to Sarah, the younger woman didn’t deserve that, but it was her defence mechanism. She hated to show weakness, so she lashed out. It was something she had never been able to grow out of.

“Ava... I’m not here as a psych resident, not if you don’t want me to be. I can be here as a friend, or even as a stranger, I just want to help.”

The CT surgeon had huffed at that, swiping at the stray tears still creeping down her cheeks, “Nothing to help with, Sarah. I’m just ashamed with my work today.”

“Ava... this is classic signs of a panic attack,” even though she said she wasn’t there as a doctor, Sarah couldn’t help the psychoanalysis, “What happened?”

“Lost an instrument in a patient’s heart,” Ava groaned at the sheer stupidity, “Had to reopen him and then just left Connor to clean up my mess. I fucked up.”

“No, Ava, you just made a mistake,” Sarah looked at the door before sitting down on the floor beside the other woman, “Human error happens, please don’t beat yourself up over it.”

“I could have killed him, Sarah,” she hit her leg with a closed fist out of frustration, “I just keep reliving the moment and all the ways it could have gone wrong.”

“The important thing is you saved him.”

Ava laughed bitterly, “Barely. How could I be so careless?”

“What was it?”

“The end of a suction catheter...”

“Ava,” Sarah reached a hand out to cautiously hold hers, saving her whitened knuckles from the angry fist they were in, “That’s so small and they shouldn’t come off that easy, of course you wouldn’t expect to lose something like that inside a patient. It was a mistake and you fixed it, please don’t beat yourself up.”

“I let Dr. Latham down... and Connor was so mad...”

“I know, and I know that’s scary,” Doctor Reese agreed, “But you fixed it and all you can do is monitor your patient and grow from the mistake.”

Ava sighed and looked down at their hands, still tightly clasped together. She didn’t remember twining their fingers together or leaning closer to Sarah, but it felt right at the time. The younger girl was her source of stability in that moment, someone she knew wouldn’t judge her or break her trust. It was that moment that Ava decided she would quite like to be more friendly with the psych resident, as she seemed like someone worth knowing.

The rest was history, really. They got closer, became friends over time. Walks for coffee on breaks and discussing cases over lunch quickly became habitual for them. Reese would stop to talk to Ava as she walked through the CICU, something she had never done before. They just worked, the two seemed to realize, and their bond only got strong. It escalated quickly one night, when they got a little too wine drunk on a well deserved night off. Sarah’s usual apprehension disappeared with every drink, returning Ava’s relentless flirting without hesitation. One drunken kiss and they knew, there was no turning back and to be honest neither of them wanted it any other way.

That had been almost eight months ago and somehow they had kept their relationship under wraps in the hospital. Sarah was the one who helped diagnose Ava’s panic and sensory processing disorders, so it was kind of an issue that they were together. She was going to have to switch to a different psychiatrist if word of their relationship spread, but that would be the least of her problems.

Ava knew it would get out eventually, probably the second Maggie caught wind of it, but she didn’t mind. She knew her feelings for Sarah and was unabashed about her bisexuality at that point. It’s not like they were the first doctors in this hospital to be involved, much less the last. She knew Connor might take it a bit hard, felt bad for stringing him along, but really he deserved it in some twisted way. Maybe it would hurt his ego just enough to crush his God complex; losing Ava to a female psych resident.

Ava was still lost in thought as the elevator doors opened to the radiology floor. She jumped when a medical student brushed past her with a halfhearted apology, tearing from her memories to walk off onto the floor. She found her way to the echo waiting area, finding the radiologist quickly.

“Jason Abrams,” the tech said with a terse tone, “You’re gonna want to see this.”

“Mitral regurge?” Ava guessed before she even saw the scan, knowing she was probably correct in her first diagnosis.

“Correct,” he replied, “Very progressed too. Looking at maybe a few weeks before complete prolapse.”

“Poor man.”

“Meds won’t fix it, then?” The tech guessed.

Ava studied the scan before shaking her head, “No, too far gone. I’m probably going to have to replace the valve ASAP, depending on how his body responds to the beta blockers.”

“Shame,” the man shook his head, “Good luck, Doctor Bekker.”

“Thanks.”

With that Ava motioned a nurse in and asked her to take Mr. Abrams up to the cardiac ICU so she could speak to him and his wife in a more comfortable location. The nurse nodded and disappeared to do just that, leaving Ava to make her way upstairs on her own.

She took out her phone and made a call as she was in the elevator alone.

“This is Doctor Reese.”

“Hey, Reese cup,” Ava smiled at the professional tone her girlfriend had answered the call with. She never looked at her caller ID and always made a habit of a professional answer.

“Oh, hi, Aves.”

“You’re cute when you sound all professional,” Ava teased.

“Oh hush,” she could almost see Sarah rolling her eyes, “What’s up?”

“Might have to push our coffee date back a little,” Ava began apologetically, “I might have to do a valve replacement now now.”

“Okay, no worries,” of course Sarah was immediately understanding, “Good luck with your surgery then.”

“Thank you, you’re a doll.”

“So you tell me,” Sarah laughed, “Your slang is sneaking in again, by the way.”

“Is it?” Ava pretended to be shocked, stepping off the elevator, “Hadn’t noticed.”

“Mhm, makes the accent even cuter.”

“Aw, bokkie~” she made sure to use the Afrikaans pet name that Sarah found embarrassingly adorable, “You flatter me.”

“What does that mean again?” Sarah asked after a moment of hesitation and Ava knew she was probably blushing like mad.

“Little doe,” The blonde supplied, “I’d say it suits you.”

“Cheesy.”

“Always,” Ava shot back, “Okay I’m up in the CICU, I’ll page you later?”

“Of course, Doctor Bekker,” Sarah’s voice changed, though not unfriendly,” I’ll see you then.”

“Charles?” Ava laughed, “Bye, love.”

“Bye, Aves.”

Ava sighed as she rounded to corner to her patient’s room, pocketing her phone, “Here goes nothing.”

***

Forty minutes later Ava was scrubbing in, taking off her rings to wash her hands thoroughly. She was humming quietly to herself, trying to ground her thoughts before surgery.

“A valve replacement?” The door had opened to reveal an annoyed Connor, “You weren’t going to page me?”

“My patient, Connor.”

“I’m the trauma surgeon, Ava!”

“You were busy,” she retorted, “And besides he wasn’t even really a trauma. I can do a valve replacement on my own, thanks.”

“You need an assist.”

“You just saying that to steal my lead surgeon position,” she rolled her eyes, “Learn to share, Connor.”

“I’m scrubbing in,” he grumbled.

“I’m lead surgeon,” Ava shook her head as she brushed past him, “Accept that or get off my case.”

She went into the OR and accepted her gown and gloves from the scrub nurse. As she was tying up her gown, she made eye contact with Jason who looked rather nervous.

She gestured for Marty to start the anesthesia, getting into her position and rolling her shoulders a little. Connor stalked into the room and got his gloves and gown, not acknowledging her placement.

“No temper tantrums in my OR, Connor.”

The surgery started completely as normal. Eventually their argument fizzled out and they fell back into the familiar rhythm of operating together. The two CT fellows may have had their ups and downs but there was no doubt that they worked well together in surgery.

“Mechanical valve?” Connor asked, as they had already removed the damaged mitral valve.

“On back order,” the scrub nurse said, “We don’t have this size right now.”

“Oh for fok’s sake,” Ava muttered, glaring sharply at Connor when he immediately mocked her accent.

“It’s funny, Ava, lighten up.”

“I don’t mock yours, Connor.”

“Size 3 porcine valve then,” Connor changed the subject, not needing to start another fight during the hardest part of the surgery.

“They degenerate in half the amount of time,” Ava groaned, “And blood thinners wouldn’t have been a problem for him.”

Connor didn’t answer and they continued the replacement, not speaking other than to direct each other’s movements or ask for other instruments. They had transplanted the valve just fine and things seemed to work out perfectly. Ava was just about to ask for the proper suture size for the pericardium when the monitor started beeping like crazy.

“Shit,” Connor cursed lowly, “Marty?”

“Afib.”

“Why?” Ava looked desperately at Connor, “What happened?”

Connor was fumbling to figure out the issue amidst the rapid, uneven beating of the patient’s heart. Ava cursed herself when she realized the issue.

“Valve must have thrown a clot.”

“Already? How?”

“I don’t know, Connor!” Ava was too overwhelmed to think straight let alone answer his mindless questions, “Internal paddles!”

They worked to regain proper rhythm, shocking the heart to restart its beating. That didn’t seem to help though, unfortunately the opposite happened. Just as they had gotten the atrial fibrillation under control, another thing went wrong.

“Blood pressure’s dropping,” a nurse called out, making Ava look up at the monitors for clarification.

“Connor.”

“I know,” he replied, trying to figure out what had gone wrong.

“Doctor Bekker,” the anesthesiologist shouted just as the machine went wild again, “He’s in vfib!”

“Jesus,” Ava’s own heart felt like it was about to jump out of her chest, “Starting intracardiac massage.” Ava began internal compressions as she muttered under her breath, “Come on, Jason, you can’t die on all of them.”

Connor was ordering the nurses around to get epinephrine and recharging the paddles. Ava could barely breathe in the moment, questioning how everything went wrong and what had even happened.

“Charging,” Connor was saying, “Clear!”

Ava moved out of the way so Connor could shock the heart, but it didn’t help the rhythm any. Ava ordered another round of epi, restarting internal compressions.

“How long’s he been down?”

“Three minutes.”

“Damn,” Connor sighed, “Charge again.”

The next bout of electricity didn’t help to restart the heart and it was clear that this wouldn’t be resolved so easily. Ava didn’t give up on compressions, still mumbling half to herself and half to the patient. By the time they had reached the ten minute mark with no improvement, Connor had to grab Ava’s wrist to get her attention.

“Ava,” he halted her movements, “Doctor Bekker, he’s been down for too long. I’m sorry.”

“No...”

“You did what you could, Ava,” Connor’s voice was softer than ever as he tried to keep her calm, “It’s time to call it.”

“Connor...” Ava’s voice sounded pained as she glanced at the clock, “... time of death, 13:47.”

The other surgeon noticed how hard Ava was shaking when they left the OR to scrub out. He watched as she washed her hands roughly, her whole body trembling. No matter how many patients they lost, it would still affect Ava like the first every time.

“Ava...”

She just shook her head, not able to make eye contact, sliding her rings back on with a frustrated movement.

“You tried your best,” he tried again, “And we won’t know what happened until an autopsy’s done. Don’t blame yourself.”

“I don’t want your foking pity, Connor.” Ava snapped, accent even thicker as she held back tears, turning on her heels to rush out of the room.

“Damn it,” Connor cursed, pulling out his phone as the door slammed shut behind the panicking woman.

***

Ava had made it to the CT doctor’s lounge before promptly collapsing on the floor. She let out a gasping breath as the panic overtook her, shame flooding her system at this reaction. Why couldn’t she just be a normal doctor and depersonalize from the loss? Instead every dead patient and lost cause had to make her feel like she was the one who was dying.

She shook her hands out aggressively, trying to channel her anxiety and frustration into motion. It didn’t help though and a pained sob ripped its way from her throat. Covering her ears as if to block out the sounds of her own anxiety, Ava was shaking even harder than before. She knew this was a full blown panic attack and she should call Sarah to get her meds, but she could bring herself to breathe much less find her phone.

“What did I do? F-fuck where did I... w-hat went wrong?”

She was hyperventilating at this point, could feel her heart beating rapidly in her own chest. The sensation only made things worse, made her thing about how Jason’s heart was no longer beating because of her. Ava was so wrapped up in her panic that she didn’t hear the door open, she didn’t even notice when someone was calling her name.

“Ava?” A familiar voice was just barely audible as she still had her hands over her ears. She felt someone sit down on the floor in front of her and could just barely make out a mass of curly hair through her tears.

“Ava, honey,” Sarah was trying to gently catch her attention, “Look at me. Ava, you’re okay.”

“S-Sarah?”

“I’m right here, see?” Sarah reached her arm out but didn’t touch her girlfriend, knowing that touch while she was panicking could only make things worse. Sarah frowned as she let out another shaky sob, “Breathe, baby. You’re okay, I promise.”

“No!” Ava suddenly shrieked, clasped her hands even tighter over her ears. Sarah flinched at the outburst and apologized softly.

“I’m... it’s not- not okay.”

“Okay, I’m sorry,” Sarah agreed, “What’s not okay?”

“He’s dead,” Ava spat, “He’s dead... dead because of m-me.”

Sarah sighed, “Your patient? Oh, Ava, I’m sure you did everything to save him.”

“He- he just...” her sentence was cut off as she whined in frustration, hands coming off her head to smack her legs.

“Hey, hey, Ava,” Sarah said firmly, “Don’t hurt yourself.”

“I- I don’t care!”

“I know, but I do,” Sarah reached out a hand gently but didn’t touch her, “Can I hold your hands? I won’t touch you if you don’t want me to.”

Ava looked at her with tear-filled eyes, “Too much.”

“Too much?” Sarah repeated, “What is? The lights or the sound?”

“Y-yeah.”

“Okay,” Sarah stood up to go shut off the lights, sighing when Ava cried even harder when she left. “I’m coming back, baby,” she said as she rushed back over once the room was darkened significantly. She sat back down in front of Ava, who had her face hidden in her forearms and was slouched over painfully.

“Ava,” she tried to get her attention again, “Do you have your earplugs?”

The blonde made some kind of confirming sound, shifting in a way that Sarah saw as an invitation to get them from her pocket. She spoke softly as she did so, making sure not to spook her girlfriend.

“Okay, I have them right here,” she said as she held the orange foam in her hand, “But I wanna talk to you first, then you can have these and we can be as quiet as you need.”

“Don’t want... to talk.”

“You don’t have to, but I would like to talk to you, is that okay? I missed you today.”

Ava didn’t respond, though she did peek through her arms a little bit. A minuscule nod preceded a little sniffle, making Sarah’s heart ache at the pain her girlfriend was in.

“Can you take a deep breath for me, Ava?”

Ava hesitated but eventually a shaky breath left her lungs, her arms slowly coming away from her face. Sarah smiled sadly at her, noting the makeup streaked down her cheeks and her red eyes; this had been a bad panic attack.

“Hey there, pretty girl,” Sarah said gently, hoping to make her feel a bit better with the lighthearted words. Ava squeaked at that, lip still quivering as her anxiety hadn’t completely left yet.

“Breathe,” Sarah reminded her, taking her own deep breath to prompt the surgeon to do the same. This next one was less shaky, though a big sniffle preceded it.

“Good,” Sarah smiled again, “You’re okay, baby.”

“Not... not really.”

“Not now, maybe,” Sarah agreed, “But you’re safe and I’m going to help you.”

“I... I- let him down, S-Sarah.”

“Who?” Sarah prompted, shifting a little bit closer without touching her yet.

“Connor... Latham,” Ava’s eyes welled back up with tears as she spoke the last name, “J-Jason.”

“Oh, Ava. You didn’t let anyone down. You did your very best as a surgeon, okay?”

“H-how do you know that?”

Sarah sighed, “Baby?”

“Y-yeah?”

“C’mere,” the resident opened her arms, an invitation for Ava to find comfort in them. The older woman hesitated, still half in panic mode, but Sarah’s gentle eyes won her over in the end.

Sarah smiled sadly as Ava half crawled the short distance to slump in her arms, her face quickly finding its hiding place in her neck. Sarah just wrapped her arms around her securely, holding her girlfriend’s shaking body in an attempt to slow her heart rate.

“You, Ava Bekker, are an amazing surgeon,” she began softly, “You work so tirelessly, you’re so selfless when it comes to patients. You love your job, Ava, and you’re insanely good at it. How did you let anyone down today?”

“He... he didn’t- didn’t make it.”

“That happens,” Sarah replied, “Unfortunately. He wasn’t your first loss and he won’t be your last. I know you hurt for him and I know it’s a horrible feeling. You did everything you could, though.”

“How do you know that?” Ava repeated, pained eyes meeting Sarah’s.

“Because you’re the most caring and meticulous surgeon I know. I know you and you certainly wouldn’t give up unless it was the only thing to do.”

“I hate this.”

“I know, love,” Sarah’s gentle hand came up to take the elastic out of Ava’s hair, “I’m so sorry.”

Ava leaned into the loving touch as she smoothed down her hair, her breathing finally even. Tears were still steadily falling down her cheeks, falling into the crook of Sarah’s neck and staining her dress shirt.

“I have your pills,” Sarah said softly, “You want one? It might help.”

There was an extended silence before another minuscule nod. Sarah went to pull back, trying to get the bottle out of her coat, but Ava whined and held tightly onto her.

“Hey,” Sarah cooed softly, “Calm down, Aves. I’m not going anywhere. I just wanna get you some Ativan and water, okay? Then we can sit on the couch together and calm down.”

It took some gentle persuasion before Ava untangled herself from Sarah and stood on shaky legs. Her girlfriend smiled at her sadly, taking her trembling hand to lead her to one of the couches in the lounge. She pressed gently on Ava’s shoulders to get her to sit, leading down to drop a kiss to her forehead.

“Just getting some water,” she promised as she made her way to the counter, grabbing a familiar mug of Ava’s off the drying rack. She filled it with cold water from the cooler, taking out the bottle of sedatives and grabbing one for her as well. Sarah turned back to find Ava curled into herself on the couch, face buried in her hands again. Coming over, she crouched in front of the surgeon and nudged her leg. “Here, my love,” her voice was impossibly gentle, “You need to relax.”

Ava frowned but moved her hands, taking the cup and allowing Sarah to place the pill under her tongue. She let the thing melt, wincing at the taste, but knew the sublingual method would get it into her bloodstream faster. She took a sip of water when it was gone, finally realizing how dehydrated she was from crying so long. She finished the mug in under a minute, making Sarah chuckle lowly when she took the cup back.

The brunette set the cup down on the table, sitting beside Ava on the couch. She held out her hand, the earplugs nestled on her palm like a peace offering. Her girlfriend gave her a pained smile and took them back, debating on if she wanted them in or not.

“Sarah?” Ava sighed shakily, “I’m... I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for, Aves?”

“Being such a pain,” Ava mumbled, “This was highly dramatic of me.”

Sarah shook her head, a gentle hand coming to rest on Ava’s thigh, “This is my job, babe, I can assure you that this was an entirely nature response to stress. You have two diagnoses that make this 100x times harder and you still manage to be an amazing surgeon; sometimes you’re going to have meltdowns.”

“I still hate it.”

“I know,” Sarah nodded, “But we got through it, right?”

Ava shrugged again and they fell into silence for a moment, Ava letting out a very shaky sigh. Her girlfriend turned to look at her, smiling at what she saw. The Ativan had clearly taken affect, Ava’s eyes were drooping and her breathing had evened out finally. She looked at Sarah wearily, mumbling something under her breath.

“Tired?”

“Mm,” Ava agreed, “Don’t like pills. Wanna... be awake.”

“I know, baby,” Sarah laughed, “But they help, don’t they?”

Another nod, Ava blinked sleepily at her, “Hug?”

The younger woman immediately opened her arms, pulling her close once again. Ava sighed and leaned into her embrace, finally calm for the first time in hours.

“You can nap here, if you want,” Sarah murmured, “No sense moving to a on call room or anything. You don’t need to see patients right now, Doctor Latham would understand.”

“No... stay...”

“Ava,” Sarah chuckled and shimmied until she was laying down on the couch, pulling her girlfriend down with her, “I’m not going anywhere.”

Ava seemed happy with their current position, shifting her weight on top of Sarah and snuggling down comfortably. She handed her earplugs to Sarah, letting her put them in her ears because her hands were still unsteady. With the sound of the room dramatically decreased and her eyes heavy from the sedative, she felt her anxiety ebbing away to exhaustion.

“Get some rest,” she heard Sarah’s muffled words, “You’re safe and you did so well today.” Ava felt soft hands on her back, smoothing down her unruly hair again and rubbing gently at the tense muscles of her upper back. She sighed, finally letting herself relax into her girlfriend’s safe embrace.

“You don’t have to be strong all the time. It’s okay to feel things, yeah? You know I’m always here.”

Ava nodded against her chest, “Ja,” the Afrikaans slipping into her vocabulary as she drifted between sleep and wake, “I... love you, Bokkie.”

Sarah’s cheeks flushed and she was very glad that Ava couldn’t see that reaction to tease her about it, “I love you too, Aves.”

***

Connor rubbed at his face tiredly, making his way down the hallway. He knew he must have left his jacket around the CT floor somewhere, just couldn’t remember where. He reached the doctor’s lounge, hoping he would find it thrown across a chair or something so he could go home. He did not expect to find the sight in front of him when he opened the door.

In the darkened room, the minimal sunlight from the windows highlighted the two figures on the couch closest to the door. Ava was fast asleep on top of Sarah Reese, neon orange earplugs peeking out from under her hair and makeup streaked down her cheeks. Sarah had her arms protectively around Ava’s waist and the younger woman was still awake. She was occupying herself by playing with Ava’s soft blonde hair, the gentle gesture evidently tender. Connor was not expecting her to lean down and press a kiss to Ava’s head, a loving action he immediately knew indicated something way beyond friendship.

He must have made a sound, shifted too heavy or something, because Sarah jumped and looked up. He could see her cheeks turn bright red with embarrassment and knew she wasn’t expecting to be caught in such a vulnerable situation with the least vulnerable surgeon in Gaffney.

“Doctor Rhodes...” Sarah’s voice was a barely audible whisper, clearly trying not to wake the exhausted woman in her arms.

Connor hushed her, shaking his head with a small smile. Maybe it was better this way, even if his initial reaction was the wish to curse and fight for Ava like he always did. Seeing her like this, soft and vulnerable in a way even he had scarcely seen, made him know. Ava loved the psych resident, and the feeling was mutual. She clearly found her safety net in Sarah, and who was he to fight that when he knew how much she needed that?

“Thank you,” he whispered, pointing at Ava with a sad look. He grabbed his jacket off the desk chair, waving goodbye to Sarah and taking one last glance at his beloved fellow surgeon in her arms.

Take care of her, Reese

#pls give feedback this is my first med oneshot 😭 #tumblr’s paragraph limit hates me #anxious!ava #chicago med #ava bekker #sarah reese #reesker #connor rhodes #chicago med fanfiction #reesker fanfiction #my-writing