#I have seen so many of these posts

[chloroform-e]

Love and Loneliness

Sally Rooney, Normal People // Brit Bennett, The Mothers // Bleachers (ft Bruce Springsteen), Chinatown // Bleachers, Wake me // Leonard Cohen, Dance me to the end of love

Bonus : Zoe Kravitz in High Fideliy (episode 4)

#I have seen so many of these posts #but never made one #feels like my tumblr graduation #sally rooney #normal people #bleachers #leonard cohen #high fidelity #the mothers #brit bennett #it's actually embarrassing how many of the quotes I collect are about loneliness and yearning #so here #have a few #also I just finished rewatching high fidelity and will be sad about it for a few days #so you can expect another post about that

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Must be a Sugondese joke.

#dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims #laios touden #senshi #Looks like I won't be able to post this on dungeon meshi thursday so instead I will have a fun past/future conversation #This is wednesday me who has not seen the episode yet but I have such a strong feeling that it is going to be extremely special. #*This* fight is what the first arc has been building up to and it has *so* many incredible moments. #We're going to see the chilchuck knife throw! The leg sacrifice! The bones! #Watch them ramp up the quality this episode and go wild with the frantic action of 'oh god our plan is going to shit'. #Hello. Me of the future who just watched the episode. #I knew it was going to be good but that...that blew my mind completely. My high expectations were beyond met. My god. #I'm just speechless at how well they handled everything. The leg. The tension. That ENDING. #If you have not already: PLEASE watch Dungeon Meshi.

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[originalartblog]

Apparently much-needed reminder that reposting artists' art (by saving the images or screenshotting them and reuploading them yourself) on other platforms without the artists' expressed permission and without credit is theft and an insult to their passion and craft. You are profiting (in views, in attention, in feedback) from someone else's work and ideas, who do not get that feedback for sharing their creation.

If you are an art reposter, you are a thief and I have no respect for you.

#learn basic internet etiquette i am begging but also holding a knife. yes i'm mad. more about others than myself. #do you know how many artists i have seen leave social media because their art started being reposted all over? #tip: way too fucking many #i've had many people tell me about people reposting my art on tiktok #no one ever asked to repost my art on tiktok. ever. they just save super fried bad crunchy jpegs of my art and repost them #they get 20k likes and don't even bother naming me #also a reason i started signing my name more legibly and why my blog web address is always there but apparently no one can even read that #a few people got an ok for translations on other platforms though #i'm going to be annoying with this post and reblog it a few times to try to catch the people who apparently need to be told #tiny skk adventures #nawy's comics #nawy's doodles #apparently those are reposters' favourites so here look at this

[melonsharks]

i went. insane. LOOK. i know a lot of people realllyyyy wanted crowley to be the wedding dress designer LOOK I KNOW AND ITS OK u can make ur own au i promise but in MY WORLD. you need to understand me.

crowley owning a vineyard is personal to me. he is THE snake in the garden of eden, tempting is his JOB ok. he makes wines aziraphale indulges in, aziraphale designs dresses with crowley in mind. do you hear me. are you listening to me. i have everything from the second they meet mapped out OK i know what im talking about. listen to my delusions, boy.

#ive been losing my mind ive seen this movie so many times this week #how my friends arent sick of hearing me talk abt this is a miracle in and of itself #good omens #good omens 2 #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable divorce #warlock dowling #go adam young #ineffable husbands #parent trap au #good omens au #gabuart #I WAS ONLY PLANNING TO DRAW THIS ONCE AND NEVER TALK ABOUT IT AGAIN. #i have more where theyre young but ill post them tomorrow #i mean im posting them all on instagram tonight so u can see them there if u want

[golyadkin]

I cannot express enough that if your reaction, as a hobby artist, to not getting that many notes on your art is to say "maybe I should just stop doing art altogether" you need to stop posting art to tumblr

not necessarily forever, not even for long, but just stop putting your art on here and start doing it for you again, remember why you enjoyed doing art in the first place and stop relying on the attention of faceless people on the internet for your enjoyment of your hard work

believe me, I get it, nothing crushes the artistic soul quite like labouring for hours on a piece only for it to get like 10 notes, so you need to find your own source of joy in the act of creation and a lot of the time that means making art and not showing it to anybody

#not art #listen #for real #this is not about any one person because i've seen posts about it from a bunch of people #you think i post everything here? buddy i dont even post half my stuff here #every drawing you see is preceded by five more just like it #that never see my cursor close to the save button #i have a sketchbook i draw in regularly that i do'nt show to a single goddam person #i make cutout art from gels i steal from work and stick them to my windows and do paintings in my living room just for me #because that it the only way you are ever going to be able to retain your original love of art #is by doing it for the sake of doing it #not for the sake of seeing how many people stop and stare #anyways i'm sorry if this sounds terse #but i'm so sick of seeing artists put all their self-esteem and happiness in the hands of a blogging website #stop selling yourself short by measuring your self worth by how many reblogs you get and what people say in the tags #your artistry and your happiness are worth more than that #if you're an artist for a living that's another story #but even then #even then #anyways sorry i'm done ranting

[cozylittleartblog]

is this the tragic clown the sims warned me about

#tadc #the amazing digital circus #pomni #art #doodles #sketchdump #just kidding that's the other guy that got turned into the forbidden polygon spaghetti and eyeballs #artblock go brrt haha #''say the line cozy'' i don't like how this looks (crowd cheers) #maybe I'M the tragic clown #the first fanart is always the most intimidating i'm fine now probably #i also have to draw feddy fanart i just don't have any good ideas for that either #feddy movie is good btw. surprisingly. i have already seen it three times #anyway pomni is cute i like her. i hope nothing demented happens to her (so many demented things are going to happen to her) #once again scheduling this for when i will be asleep so i can't change my mind about it. which is how i post most of my art

[officialspec]

ill be honest as much as i love to criticise the use of fatphobia for comedy ill never be able to hold the fatphobic jokes in kung fu panda against it

like yea those movies are guilty of dipping into The Usual Tropes for a cheap laugh but not only is the character writing for the fat characters the strongest and most sympathetic ive Ever seen literally just the character designs of the pandas in the 3rd movie get me choked up sometimes. theyre all so appealing and clearly treated with the same care and attention as everyone else without copping out and making them Barely Fat. po is already a size that doesnt exist in film protags and hes still the thinnest person in that whole village and that meant a lot to me

#i havent seen the movies in ages but the design of the ribbon dancer is sooo . AUGH #like not just to have that many fat characters but have them be REALLY fat without being treated as ugly or nasty #OR THEIR FATNESS BEING TEMPORARY !!! its their natural state thats how theyre meant to look!!!! #its easy to get caught in the thinking of like. having fat characters be a minority in a lineup to reflect 'real life' #EVEN THO that isnt always true but regardless #having a cast where the nonfat characters are so few and far between theyre hardly present at all. so fucking enriching 2 me #imo writing-wise the third one is by far the weakest but it still is just so important to me that they designed the pandas like that #can i kfp post on main is that allowed #idk i watched a video essay im emotional abt this again

[ghostampede]

she’s the protagonist she’s the antagonist she’s the villian she’s the hero she’s a bystander she’s a victim she’s vengence she’s a scared girl she’s going to save the world she’s meant to die she’s immortal she’s the saviour of the world she’s going to burn it all down she’s an extremist she’s pragmatic she’s optimistic she’s divorced she’s faithful she’s a prisoner of time itself she’s trapped eternally she’s free forever she’s dancing across the 4 dimension she’s playing games we will never understand she’s alive she’s dead she’s the observer she’s the cat in the box-

#zero escape #implied zero escape spoilers #this is about #akane kurashiki #genuinely one the most nuanced and complex characters i have seen in a while #akane zero escape #zero escape 999 #zero escape vlr #zero escape ztd #9 hours 9 persons 9 doors #virtue’s last reward #zero time dilemma #rambles #zero escape spoilers #2000+ reblogs later and i still feel pain whenever someone tags this as a blorbo post #this is about AKANE KURASHIKI put RESPECT on her NAME #fr though glad so many people have characters they connect to this #though i must reiterate i am being 100% specific and literal about this with akane kurashiki #please play zero escape for more details #:D

[brookheimer]

people acting like twitter's new post count is gonna cause a mass exodus to tumblr.... this website's demographic has not changed in 865578 years and it sure as hell won't now. this is the site for people who were weird and unhappy in middle school. everyone on here has either been around since they were weird unhappy 13-year-olds or joined when they were weird unhappy 13-year-olds, left because they thought they were normal for a while, then came crawling back again when they realized deep down they were still weird unhappy 13-year-olds. what does this site possibly have to offer you if you grew up happy well-adjusted and unaware of homestuck

#like have you seen that poll of when people joined tumblr and it's ALLLL early/mid 2010s if not earlier?? #twitter's fuckups have brought some people over but like. not as many as yall think #and thank god for that. i am very happy in my small corner of this website where i am surrounded by people with good taste and good takes #LOL #i'm the second category btw. weird unhappy 13yo --> No Im Normal --> oh ok no i'm not but shhh keep it on the dl (tumblr) this time #instead of running around asking everyone if they've heard of this thing called homestuck and giggling whenever anyone said bucket #...dark times. #but no like it's so funny to me that people think normal people will actually use tumblr. the stigma around it ALONE will drive em away #which like. fair honestly lolll #100 #this time on posts i didn’t expect to get notes #lollll #500 #1000

[crazy-fangirl2524]

My biggest flex will always be how I knew Neil was the more feral and dangerous one than Andrew this whole time even before tsc and seeing the entire fandom freaked out makes me want to kiss and hug Nora and just thank her for finally finally showing everyone and I’m not just crazy

#seeing all the post about like omg Neil is so feral?! like brother did you not read aftg did y’all forget aftg is from Neil’s pov #ofc Neil wouldn’t say he’s feral in his own pov tf😭😭😭 #and remember in aftg Neil still has to hide part of himself BECASUE his father and eveyrhhing but now he’s literally free from his biggest #fear and he could do whatever the fuck he wants #Istg the fandom is like the foxes man idk why everyone is so shook #literally cant thank Nora enough for showing everyone finally #Idc if I sound proud or whatever but I fucking knew it this entire time and I have been shouting it for so long like finally #that’s why so many fics annoyed me so much like #I just needed to say this because I finally felt seen and heard andFINALLY LIKE URGH #tsc and aftg supremacy #tsc #tsc spoilers #the sunshine court #the sunshine court spoilers #aftg #all for the game #tfc #the foxhole court #aftg series #aftg fandom #aftg incorrect quotes #neil josten #andrew minyard #andrew joseph minyard #neil abram josten #aftg neil #aftg thoughts #aftg textpost #aftg shitpost #incorrect tfc

[inkskinned]

you wanted to be a good friend, because you loved your friends, but the truth was that everyone else somehow had a pamphlet on being normal that you never received. most of the time you learn by trial-and-error. you are terrified of the next big mistake you make, because it seems like the rules are completely arbitrary.

you've learned to keep the prickly parts of your personality in a stormcloud under your bed - as if they're a second version of you; one that will make your friends hate you. it feels feral, burning, ugly.

instead, you have assembled habits based on the statistical likelihood of pleasing others. you're a good listener, which is to say - if you do speak up, you might end up saying the wrong thing and scaring off someone, but people tend to like someone-who-listens. or you've got no true desires or goals, because people like it when you're passive, mutable. you're "not easy to fluster" which is to say - your emotions are fundamentally uninteresting to others around you; so you've learned to control them to a degree that you can no longer really feel them happening.

you have long suspected something is wrong with you, but most of the time, googling doesn't help. you are so-used to helping-yourself, alone and with no handbook. the reek of your real self feels more like a horrible joke - you wake up, and, despite all your preparations, suddenly the whole house is full of smoke. the real you is someone waiting to ruin your other-life, the one where you're normal and happy. the real-self is unpredictable, angry.

your real self snarls when people infantilize the whole situation. because if you were really suffering, everyone seems to think you'd be completely unable to cope. but you already learned the rules, so you do know how to cope, and you have fucking been coping. it's not black-and-white. it's not that you are healed during the other times - it's just that you're able to fucking try. and honestly, whenever you show symptoms, it's a really fucking bad sign.

because the symptoms you have are ugly and unmanageable for others. your symptoms aren't waifish white girl things. they're annoying and complicated. they will be the subject of so many pretentious instagram reels. if they cared about you, they'd just show up on time. you care, a lot, so deeply it burns you. you like to picture a world where the comments read if they loved you, they'd never need glasses to see. but since that's a rule you've seen repeated - "one must never be late or you are a bad friend" - you constantly worry about being late and leave agonizingly early. there are no words for how you feel when you're still late; no matter how hard you were trying.

so you have to make up for it. you have to make up for that little horrible real you that you keep locked in a cabinet. you are bad at answering emails so every project you make has to be perfect. you are weird and sensitive so you have to learn to be funny and interesting. you are an inconvenience to others, so you become as smooth as possible, buffing out all the rough parts.

all this. all this. so people can pass their hands over you and just tell you just the once -how good you are. you're a good friend. you're loveable.

#spilled ink #woke up at 530 to write this lmafo #me in a cold sweat: #how do i be normal #edit in the tags: #hey so i've seen y'all talk about like ... wondering if ur ''allowed'' to relate #like if this is about X specific diagnosis #and when i first posted it i really almost labelled it ''please don't assume this is about a specific condition'' #because as an artist i am often walking this line of discussing a symptom or discussing my conditions etc #and sometimes yes ! i do want to talk about an experience that is specific to who i am and my condition #but sometimes the effort of the post is about the EXPERIENCE rather than the diagnosis #because yes i am not neurotypical and as a result that influences my work but it is ALSO true that there are many reasons #why someone might experience this particular vague horrible feeling that you are... almost being CHASED by what you ''really'' are. #that you're outrunning your symptoms... that you're not really normal you're just sort of a mockery of a person #.... that's a really isolating and horrible way to feel no matter why you are feeling it. and the nature of this PARTICULAR post is that #it is inherently talking ABOUT that sense of isolation & of feeling not-deserving & of minimizing your own experiences to make urself #palatable for society in a way that others find easy-to-deal-with.... #this post is about a certain experience such that my impression is there's a higher likelihood that those who relate #would have more difficulty thinking they ''deserve'' to relate - that it doesn't REALLY belong to them #bc often we are the kind of people who are SO used to being alienated and set aside and ''different'' that we AUTOMATICALLY assume #that things are not ''for'' us... they never have been why would it start now #we are the kinds of people to be ... ''too normal for X diagnosis but too symptomatic to be normal'' #[or as this post points out... so good at ''coping''/masking/hiding it that we essentially conform to whatever shape we're poured into] #but i have witnessed others already say in the tags ''thought this was about me but it's about X so it can't be'' #and im like ... of course it was about you. #art is not a resource that is diminished by greater appreciation . #you reflect in whatever mirror fits your frame. not just the ones in your bedroom. not just the ones i specifically give you. #there will be - and often are - times that i will talk about my specific conditions... but if you're reading this #regardless of why you're here... we are here together. holding hands through space and time. and i love you for carrying it #and i know you're exhausted. i am too. but i understand. and i see you.

[waitineedaname]

not romantic or platonic but a secret third thing (bonded pair)

#I think more character dynamics should be described as bonded pairs #are two characters very attached to each other in a way that's hard to define? bonded pair. #are two characters rarely seen in a scene without each other? bonded pair #do two characters get anxious when separated? bonded pair #I don't mean this in a weird way I mean it in the way cats will be bonded when at a shelter together or something #this can apply to so many characters I think #regardless of whether they're romantic or platonic or whatever #most necrocav duos in tlt for example #and too many duos in fma to count #like obviously knowing me im thinking about greedling #but also the elric brothers or mustang and hawkeye #but also. many of the side characters. #doing my massive spreadsheet (almost done btw!) has shown to me that jerso and zampano are almost always in the same scene #that's a bonded pair babey #brosh and ross too. to me. #anyway. someone once left the tags ''bonded pair do not separate'' on a greedling post of mine and i haven't stop thinking about it #that's just how I conceptualize their dynamic now #two cats that have to be adopted together or else they'll start destroying furniture

[ewwww-what]

an archdevil and a presidential candidate sneak into a gay bar

flatcolor + closeups below :)

#they love each other so much you guys don’t understand #they’ve lived together for years. they have seen each other at their worst. #THEY HAVE CHOSEN EACH OTHEROVER EVERYTHING SO MANY TIMES #ITS ALL ABOUT FRIENDSHIP #ITS ALL ABOUT THE PEOPLE YOU LOVE #ITS ALL ABOUT TAKING CARE OF EACH OTHER #my brother just brought me fettuccine alfredo #which is an important addon to this post #(it’s all about taking care of each other) #BY THE WAY #I understand the ‘they are sisters’ response to lots of my bad girls posts but I need to make it so clear that it’s more than that #not to be that guy because I do get it but I’m in a constant state of twisting myself around my art to avoid some things #and something I get a bunch is people seeing things as either ‘they’re siblings’ or ‘they’re dating’ when neither was my intention #because what I’m trying to get across here isn’t romantic and it’s not really sisterly either. love is such a wide range beyond that #+ and I want those types of love to also be understood within my art y’know #all that to say that it’s not that deep and they love each other very very much any way you slice it #d20 #d20 fantasy high #dimension 20 #d20 fanart #fantasy high #fhjy #kristen applebees #fig faeth #fig fantasy high #kristen fantasy high #kristen chilis applebees #fantasy high fanart #undescribed #my art

[destinationtoast]

So, Tumblr is doing another new thing, and you may want to make your Likes private.

On my dash, I've started seeing posts with a header that says "Liked by [username of someone I follow]."

So far via this new feature, I have learned that various people I follow are fans of spicy queer photography, rpf, and some controversial opinions. Which is hardly surprising on tumblr dot com, but I haven't seen some of those people reblog such content in the past, so I didn't know that about them previously. (All these folks have their Likes publicly available, so I could in theory have browsed the posts they liked before. But to me, there's a difference between having Likes visible when people go looking for them vs. having them publicized on followers' dashes.)

If you don't like the idea of your liked posts showing up on followers' dashboards with your name at the top, you can change your settings so your Likes are private.

On mobile, open up your settings and click "Pages:"

Then make sure that sharing is turned off for Likes:

You can also send feedback to Tumblr.

#psa #tumblr #tumblr likes #privacy #i think many of my followers have their dashboard curateds to not include such posts #so I'm guessing many of y'all won't have seen these #op #i'm almost certainly going to mute notifications on this post so send me an ask or DM if you want my attention #my likes have been private for ages and I'm so glad that's an option #50 #100 #500 #1K

[time-traveling-fetus]

it will be a while before i get over the fact that marine and gura straight up fucked

#NOT IN REAL LIFE #there are so many positive comments to make about this music video but the naked in bed seen is distracting me #why tf does this post have so many notes #i guess i'll tag it #houshou marine #gawr gura #hololive #vtuber #vtubers