#I want to post it!! I also don't want to be Perceived. so yeah

[drdemonprince]

Any chance you'd expand on the hank hill trans guy post? (Sorry, best indicator I could come up with.) The concept interests me as I decidedly know my maleness, yet don't feel impeded by for the most part, any male gendered norms/boxes. I am fairly masculine, though I rarely use those kinds terms to describe myself. I have found I often do stray outside of what society pushed for me when I transitioned, yet I again do not feel it has taken from my right to maleness whatsoever. I am just me, who happens to be male. I have had friends try and suggest I am NB adjacent but I do not feel this way whatsoever. I feel more people are outliers to gender expectation than we care to admit and it's disappointing the way cis-people deny that. Hope this wasn't too long winded, I value your writing and perspective, and wanted to hear more of your thoughts on this.

Yeah, well so many things all get conflated by gender labels, and it's all so personal, you know? Masculinity does not have to mean maleness, and a person's gender identity might be a reflection of some innate quality they experience themselves as having, or a general summary of their tendencies, or their desired presentation, or their sense of affinity with other people, or an interpersonal tool, or something they just go along with because it was given to them by society, or any other number of things.

I think my recent substack piece on detransition goes into this pretty well, and I have an upcoming piece of what @pastimperfection calls "bilateral dysphoria" that comes out next week that delves into it too.

I think I mostly saw taking on a male identity as a means to an end more than any kind of innate reflection of who I was, though I did feel an affinity with effeminate men for a lot of reasons. I think I also discounted how much I have in common with my fellow nonbinary people of all stripes, because that identity became so strongly associated with being an annoying type of queer person that everybody else just wrote off as ultimately being their assigned gender at birth anyway no matter how much they protested. it doesn't help that 'nonbinary' is a catchall term for literally thousands if not millions of very distinct experiences and desires.

transitioning gave me control over how i was perceived, finally, but hormones are a throttle that only go in one very specific direction, and you don't really have all that much control over which changes kick in at which times and what people will make of you once you do start registering to them as some identity other than what you were first saddled with. it's an incredible gift to be able to toggle that throttle. but it's limited, not because medical transition isn't incredible and needed for so many, but because there is no escaping the goddamned binary cissexist logic that influences everything about how people treat you, how you navigate institutions, who finds you desirable and what they want out of you, and so much else.

if you're able to cast a lot of the external societal bullshit aside and feel strong in your maleness, maybe you're stronger than me or maybe our orientation to these things is just different, i don't know. i was never all that sensitive to feedback that i was doing the whole being-a-woman-thing all that wrong. i reveled in violating those rules to an extent. succeeding at being a woman despite my best attempts was what felt super dysphoric. and now i guess im succeeding at being a man, insofar as im always read as one, and it feels just as uncomfortable and objectifying and false. i thought that with manhood i could probably just grit my teeth and deal with it, but i'm finding that i can't.

ive always been very open that for me, gender is a thing I Do, and i guess to those who know me well it wouldnt be surprising to hear that i have gotten tired of Doing Being a Man and dont feel like playing that particular gendered game anymore. I tend to get bored of things! and find the flaws in things. and find my comfort in being fault-finding and contrarian and not being a joiner. and thats okay. i learned a lot along the way. not having to try any more is a huge relief. i can just do whatever. and know actively that people will more often than not be wrong in what they make of me.

maybe it was natural feeling for you to decidely 'know' your maleness without a care for masculine standards because that is the right identity for you! and maybe i only feel secure in the "not knowing" realm and in letting go of what people think of me or finding any kind of tidy categorization for it because that's the right spot for me. for now. until i find a new interesting way to be unhappy and striving for more and different again. :) that's just part of being alive, for me.

[profoundmakerdreamerss-blog]

Omniscient Reader Fic recs:

Kimcom time travels force feed Kim Dokja love:

1.

This is that one fic that will make you cry and smile at the same time. It is one of the crackiest angst I have ever read. It is a fic that made me so happy, yet so terribly sad. But all in all, this is a fic that will make you laugh. And make you remember/ fall in love with the characters all over again. It's a wip sadly, but each chapter is so damn lovely, that I just keep going back and read over and over again.

2.

This is a soft, soft fic, it's also the fic that made me fall in love with damn premise of Kim Dokja getting love before the apocalypse. It is a fic about dokja realizing that he is loved. It is a fic that I wish to see completed one day — but I doubt it would be 😭 but the chapters that are out are again, very satisfying. And I loved it.

3.

“You are loved,” said Yoo Jonghyuk. “This is a threat,” said Yoo Jonghyuk.

This is a fic that is already really popular but this is a fic I'd recommend people to read after finishing the epilogue. Because it is gives you those soft fuzzy feelings, it sews back the torn heart that is caused by the actual book and it makes you believe in everything that is good in the world. This is fic where everyone is happy and Dokja is with them. And basically everything I ever wanted.

(these are sadly the only fics I remember reading with the premise of kimcom going back to the past 😭 but yeah they made an impression on me and I don't think I can recover.)

Moving on to the fics I'd recommend after the reading the novel as in post-epilogue:

Post-epilogue fics to heal your heart:

This is a fic I would recommend a 100 times over to anyone who would listen. This is the first fic I ever bookmarked, even after having an ao3 for YEARS, first fic I ever commented and in general one of my most favorite fic to ever written. This is a fic that healed me, that made me remember everything about I loved omniscient reader, that made me so happy that I have no words. To me, this fic is the epilogue they all got, the happy ending they deserved and it will always be canon to my mind. The way the writer wrote all of them made me cry and I'd always forever be grateful that this fic was written.

This fic is also every healing, and it hurts so damn good. The way the author build up the emotions, kimcom bonding and literally everything. The way the author writes their relationship and the way Dokja perceives them. This fic deserves so much more recognition. It is beautiful and it's also very healing. And soft with harsh edges that is soothed as you keep reading. It's basically Kim Dokja getting to learn love without his memories, it's about baby dokja healing and it is about kimcom being desperate to teach dokja that he isn't alone.

This is just soft, soft and soft. This is just fluffy, this is just what they all deserve. This is another fic that deserves so much more. This is just another dose of happiness, to read when you're having a bad day. The way the author writes the relationship between each characters, the slow healing, the love that comes so easy between them because they went through the end of the world together is fucking beautiful.

I bookmarked this on September 2022 and I still cry when I re-read it. This is a beautiful piece of how healing takes time, and how hard learning to love yourself can be and how beautiful this fic is and how I'd always hold it close to my heart no matter what. This piece also deserves so much more. This is a fic about how even after reaching the end, healing can seem out of reach. It is a fic about patience and love and just beautiul.

This is again another fic that deserves so much. This is such a beautiful depictions how healing hurts. How it is a long damn road and sometimes you might stumble and it is hard. It might be a long road but when you finally begin healing and when you learn to finally trust — isn't that the most beautiful thing ever?

I'm surprised this fic isn't more popular honestly. This is one of the fics that depicts how ugly healing. And how it is so painful painful painful when the person you love more than the world itself doesn't realize their worth and they still try. And also joonghyuk has a garden????!!!! This fic is wrapped up so beautifully and leaves on such a hopeful note. It's written really well, and the characters are so beautiful, so damn real.

-

(ANYWAYS I'll just rec these one's for now LMAO I mostly tried to rec underrated ones bc they are hidden gems, and they deserve love too. I'll make a separate post for orv Isekai/alternate world/modern world fics that needs more love because there's A LOT underrated gems. This post is mostly dedicated to @rozz-eokkk @cielelyse ; since they asked for it and I'm so sorry it took so long 😭 )

#orv #omniscient reader #omniscient reader's viewpoint #fic rec #kim dokja company #kim dokja #joongdok #kimcom #yoo joonghyuk #han sooyoung

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

#girl help #like if I wait?? I REALLY doubt I'll ever post this random little thing I just finished writing bc I'll psych myself out of it #but also. I kinda wanted innocence and sadness to be my 100th fic on ao3 #Lu rambles #this is likely a moot point and I'll do a quick proof of this 2am fic tomorrow and post it anyway #I just... there is a part of me that Hates trying new things. and this is a new thing. and I know it isn't my best quality writing #because that was kind of the point?? just to Not overthink it and write what I Wanted to write #but it is definitely uhh.. experimental shall we say. and I feel weird about that I guess?? self-conscious?? hesitant??? #I want to post it!! I also don't want to be Perceived. so yeah #I can't sleep and I'm processing all this via a Tumblr poll skskskkffnsmnf

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

it's me again !!! i've read all your jeonghan recos, thank you, they're lovely!

just wanted to ask if you had any seungcheol recos too 🥺 preferrably angsty tooo mehehe

tysm and i rly appreciate the time u give to reco fics! i luv u !!!

- 💟

Hi!!! I’m glad you liked them and I am so sorry that I took approximately literally ten years (a little over a week) to respond to this. I kept putting it off even though it was going to take me like two minutes lol I'm so sorry

I already recced you I think two Cheol fics but I'm going to rec them again because THEy'RE SO GOOD. I'm like.... really going through it with Cheol right now like he's all I talk about. I told one of my bosses at work the other day that he played golf for no reason at all I just can't get him out of my head

Push it down (sooner or later it all comes out) by @/dontflailmenow a Seungcheol camboy series which is ridiculously good

Also Sapiosexual by @/smileysuh is.... I read it recently because I'm trying to read more stuff here and it was such a good read. It's about sugar daddy!Cheol and I feel like that's all that has to be said? so good

Terrifyingly Innocent by @/twogyuu full disclosure- I have not read this, but badboy older brother's best friend!Seungcheol??? It can't be bad IT LITERALLY CAN't. Plus twogyuu is a great writer don't @ me

This is just a sugar daddy cheol drabble but it still deserves love and is really good by @/toruro

this one's for the brats by @/onlymingyus like don't @ me pt. 2 but I read so much Cehol smut. Mean hard dom!cheol is just something else

After Class by @/rubyreduji are we surprised JJ is here? No we are not I love JJ and give me professor Seungcheol everyday and I'll actually go to class

Thirst Trap and Down bad (so so bad) by @/lovelyhan are SO GOOD, thirst trap?? phone sex with Cheol. I KNOW I know. Down bad... y/n being horny because cheol calls himself daddy to his dog? relatable, honestly

I'm so sorry I don't read willingly read angst. If I read angst it is A. an accident, or B. me reading through a persons' entire masterlist. I... this is more information than you asked, but I read Twist and Shout when I was a destiel girlie (girly?) and that killed all angst enjoyment for me. I cried in the cafeteria my freshmen year of high school. SO I DON'T READ ANGST BUT I'll make an angst rec list just for you one day <3

#this is literally all smut #HAHA #I'm so sorry haha #Also #yeah #i didn't @ any of the creators #and that's my constitutional right #and don't TELL THEM I RECCED THEM #it's embarrassing #I'm embarrassed #everyone keep this post to yourself okay? #ALSO #I read lovelyhan's stories both in secret #LET ME REST MY CASE #so. #I really hate to be perceived by other writers sometimes cause that shits embarrassing everyone else is better than me #And my stories don't compare #AND I DON'T WANT TO BE PERCIEVED AS A WRITER BY OTHER WRITERS #just an annoying reader #and sometimes I just go through so much of a writers masterlist I just can't let them know I read it all in one night #AND I can't let them track me- the anon in their inbox- as me okay #like most people won't notice #BUT I HAVE TO TAKE PERCAUTIONS #so I'll read these stories sometimes and hide my reactions in my notes and reblog it later when I think it'll go mostly unnoticed #I'M GOING TO REBLOG IT #I DID SAY SOMETHING IN THEIR INBOX #DON'T @ ME #I INTERACT WITH WRITERS OKAY I JUST CANNOT LET PEOPLE KNOW ITS ME #okay now that I've blasted myself in the tags #OKAY

[astrxealis]

i really want to play dragon age origins again ngl...

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #i only ever played for a few hours but #last night i saw that uhh MOREIFAN #hi i made this post last night but i wanted to post it in the morning but forgot. i now remembered just now #MORRIGAN !! <3 i saw a gifset of her n i didn't perceive her that much back then but wow she is so pretty #alistair was my fave! he's still cool (i think) but i think i'd like morrigan more now ^___^ but also idk. hmm. #it's on the xbox and i barely use it nowadays bcs Playstation and Mobile ya. i should use the switch more. i miss my gaymes there #i was a human noble iirc. idk what i want to be now if i return to the game bcs i'll likely restart! #i actually played dragon age origins before ffxiv . i remember this fact bcs i played xiv and was like WOA i think #dragon age origins helped prepare me for this kind of gameplay (mostly involving clicking ?? iirc) #ya... also idk if i want to be a human noble anymore bcs ever since xiv yeah. faves are miqo'te and viera and lala yk ^___^ #tbh i like both miqo'tes but mostly just male viera I LOVE FEMALES don't get me wrong but there's smth abt them that is Less now #lalas i general i super love they are such lil cute funny guys. female voice 1 is best btw <3 uhh i prefer females w lalas #so it is a BALANCE ... i lov other races like elezens (they are PRETTY. fuck people who don't like elezens) #and auri. plural of aura. i forgot if there was a space. i think there was. so yeah idk which i prefer w male female (male i think) #but it is a balance yes bcs other friends like em more !! uhh mostly femras. sorry elezens. also i like the other races too okay #but i prefer TWINKS over MOMMIES /lh both are great fr tho #wow... i think if ever i were to fantasia (kinda scared of becoming a fantasia addict lmaoo /lh) i want to be male miqo most #bcs i envy male viera gender sm but ?!?!?!??! male miqo seems most fun to play. but also i'm attached to my fem miqo so. #this turned from dragon age to ffxiv. why is this inevitable. why does this always happen #also this is so far into the tags of this post now and this post has strayed so far so small yeah #WAH. sometimes i get all jhdsghjb ?!?! whenever someone is like omg hi you followed me. omg hi i yeah yeah yeah #admiration/indimitation/wrong spelling ik but my shoulders hurt rn IDC. ookay it is hsdbgj??!??! in a VERY /pos way #but also i'm shy i don't really get it (i mean i could if i analyzed it properly. but i'm shy w this okay) #but also i realize i GET THAT WAY TOO !! sometimes i'm kinda woa w some people and when they follow me back it's like hi............ #this is me w my fav writer following me back. and someone from twt i followed w/o realizing i followed them on their tumblr sb #and other people. and yeah. it's like wah hi..... <3 interesting I CAN'T THINK ANYMORE #time to do homework (or roulettes... or dailies.........) #interesting to think abt how i know the games ik. most of the games like cod and dragon age ik bcs of xbox #and they are blizzard stuff iirc !! but i grew up w square enix and a wii aside from a ps2/3 ?? so that is that

[astonmartinii]

An Oscar piastri request because I have severe brain rot. Oscar Piastri x black American!reader. Like they met through Logan and Oscar is just downright obsessed with his girlfriend and everything she does. No pressure I just really enjoy the way you write.

southern charm | oscar piastri social media au

pairing: oscar piastri x fem american!reader

once upon a time, in the magical land of the 305, one man would take the mantle of the ultimate wingman

yourusername

liked by logansargeant, arthurleclerc and 21,983 others

tagged: oscarpiastri

yourusername: pov you're my phone when i'm watching oscar piastri tiktok edits

view all comments

user1: babe those edits are doing over time

yourusername: i don't like your tone. oscar is the sexiest man ever, end of.

user2: if your gf isn't arguing with randoms online over you, is she really your gf?

user3: she doesn't hold back when it comes to oscar, that's my GOAT

oscarpiastri: can you stop sending them to me i don't like being perceived.

yourusername: too bad because i want to perceive you

logansargeant: i'd argue she wants to perceive you too much

yourusername: only because you have no one to perceive you

logansargeant: you can't call me lonely when i got you your boyfriend

yourusername: 👋 👀 hey look it's the main contributor to the male loneliness statistics 👀 👋

oscarpiastri: y/n that's mean...

yourusername: but not wrong 😑

user4: i know they're joking but y/n does not hold back

yourusername: had to prepare him for the mean f1 bitches

landonorris: so this is the mysterious gf...

yourusername: watch your step at COTA, oscar may obey team orders but i DONT

landonorris: oscar???

oscarpiastri: i'm sorry y/n can FACTUALLY do no wrong so you're on your own here mate

yourusername: thank you baby. oscar supports women's rights and wrongs he is a hashtag ally

oscarpiastri

liked by logansargeant, yourusername and 621,983 others

tagged: yourusername

oscarpiastri: getting daily outfit updates from the love of your life >>>

view all comments

user5: oh this has to be one of the healthiest celebrity relationships ever

yourusername: omg mom i'm a celebrity

user6: hi can we please get the skincare routine?

yourusername: thank you for picking the ones where i look good baby x

oscarpiastri: you look good, GREAT IN FACT, in every photo ever - every waking moment

yourusername: you're too cute osc x

logansargeant: so you get this and i just get venmo requests?

yourusername: don't hate the player, hate the game

logansargeant: what game are we playing it's just venmo requests for coffee because "i'm a girl i deserve it"

oscarpiastri: idk that sounds logical to me

logansargeant: wait does she not do this to you?

oscarpiastri: no? also just know we split the money so thank you for all of my morning coffees for the last two years logan x

logansargeant: i regret ever introducing you two

user6: obsessed with this nightmare trio

alexalbon: can confirm they are a nightmare

oscarpiastri: don't call us a nightmare on my gf appreciation post

lilymunhe: yeah alex, where's mine?

alexalbon: any trio that breaks my motorhome from getting to competitive during just dance can be categorised as a nightmare - hope this helps x

yourusername: is it because we didn't invite you?

alexalbon: it was literally MY motorhome?

oscarpiastri: we beat our best score on rasputin so sorry not sorry

user7: idk how people can say oscar has no personality when he literally would throw hands for y/n?

yourusername

liked by alexalbon, oscarpiastri and 24,871 others

yourusername: practising my smize for the COTA paddock can't allow oscar to be the only one to slay in austin

view all comments

user10: any spare paddock passes miss?

logansargeant: so i'm not allowed to slay?

yourusername: i think you need to save up all of your slaying for the track to get that point on the board

logansargeant: Y/N ????? i'm trying :(

yourusername: sorry logie bear that was a low blow from me, i'm proud of you

oscarpiastri: talented. brilliant. incredible. amazing. showstopping. spectacular. never the same. totally unique. completely not ever been done before.

yourusername: did you just quote lady gaga?

oscarpiastri: yeah, got a problem with that?

yourusername: nope. you're my favourite little monster

landonorris: i thought this was a healthy relationship - don't call my teammate a monster 😤

yourusername: that's what lady gaga fans are called lando, i've called him much worse, bring ear plugs to cota ;)

oscarpiastri: WAIT NO MY PR TEAM SAID NO MORE SEXY TIMES ON PUBLIC PLATFORMS

yourusername: boring ...

user11: so excited for the best f1 wag to be back in the paddock

yourusername: appreciate it but i can't take the crown from real icon lily

lilymunhe: omg thanks y/n i can't wait to meet you !!

alexalbon: are you always as insane as logan says

yourusername: he's probably not wrong but i prefer the term charming

oscarpiastri: we're just very passionate about things

alexalbon: like just dance?

yourusername: no comment.

mclaren

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 1,092,347 others

tagged: yourusername, oscarpiastri

mclaren: get someone who looks at you the way oscar and y/n look at each other

view all comments

user14: i came here to watch formula 1 not to feel LONELY

user15: okay who was going to tell me oscar had such a hot girlfriend?

logansargeant: trust me literally spend more than 30 seconds with him and you'll know

oscarpiastri: okay but y/n is the prettiest person in the world AND the smartest, funniest and kindest person ever so you WILL listen and appreciate her

yourusername: god i love you so much

user16: is she an aussie too?

yourusername: nope i pulled oscar with pure american southern charm

oscarpiastri: it's true she lassoed me like a cowboy and it was love at first sight

yourusername: let me clarify we were at a wild wild west party but it was defo love at first lasso

landonorris: get someone who looks at you the way i look at the MCL60 😍

user17: lando is one of us

landonorris: i feel lonelier now, around oscar and y/n, than i did right when i was broken up with

yourusername: easy to look like that when your boyfriend is a dashing, charming and humble gentleman + generational talent

oscarpiastri: hehehehe stop you're making me blush

logansargeant: you guys are so gross

yourusername: says the man that's literally an accredited wing man because YOU got us together

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and 37,988 others

tagged: oscarpiastri

yourusername: that moment when you see the love of your life achieve his dreams !!!!!!!!!! NO FR oscar i am so so unbelievably proud of you, you deserve this so much. i love you, thank you for letting me be a part of your life x

view all comments

user21: they're my parents now they have no say in it

user22: consider me charmed

oscarpiastri: thank you so much my love, your support is everything to me and i can't wait to grow old with you

yourusername: my heart is yours now and forever ❤️

oscarpiastri: also i'm finding some way to frame you celebrating in my garage

yourusername: i couldn't contain my excitement, sorry to the mechanic who literally got tinnitus from me screaming lol

user23: her in the garage is real f1 fan representation

logansargeant: as much shit as i give you guys, you're so cute and i'm so glad you guys have each other

yourusername: thank you logan!! i forever owe you one for introducing us

oscarpiastri: i promise when you get into a relationship i won't once complain about it

landonorris: i was a cynic, but yeah you guys are very cute - i am endeared

yourusername: oscar tends to have that effect

oscarpiastri: ummmmm i think it's more you

landonorris: okay i said you guys are cute you don't need to prove it again

oscarpiastri

liked by logansargeant, yourusername and 1,239,084 others

tagged: yourusername

oscarpiastri: the best weekend ever and wishing i could just take you everywhere with me, until las vegas my love x

view all comments

yourusername: take me with you

yourusername: who cares about life responsibilities when i'm with you

yourusername: i'd say i'm a good luck charm but you're too talented to need one

oscarpiastri: i love you so much i miss you already

landonorris: you said goodbye five minutes ago... we've not even got to departures yet

oscarpiastri: is it illegal to miss the love of your life?

landonorris: when i'm not in a relationship? YES.

user24: the way oscar was horrified at arthur's 18 hour screentime, i bet his is just as bad now

oscarpiastri: no comment

yourusername: it's 16 hours lol

arthurleclerc: where is my justice? my apology?

oscarpiastri: we fall asleep on face time. i'm not chronically online i'm just terminally in love with my girlfriend

arthurleclerc: trust me we know

logansargeant: the way i know he's about to fly because @yourusername texts me - always the second choice :(

yourusername: oof i guess i'll nap instead

logansargeant: no i can still beat ur ass on 8 ball pool

oscarpiastri: you can't out do the doer soz bud

yourusername: i miss you come back, bullying logan was so much better together in person

note: i hope this was what you were hoping for! i love oscar so i'm always happy to write for him and i love a good comment squabble! thanks for requesting x

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 instagram au #f1 x you #f1 #oscar piastri #oscar piastri instagram au #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri imagine

[moonastro]

peoples first impression of you

pick a picture

left to right(top)-> 1,2

left to right(bottom)-> 3,4

°DO NOT take this as literal, take everything with a grain of salt as this is purely and intendedly for entertainment purposes. °Don't be afraid to give feedback and opinions about this post (as I would entirely appreciate it). ° This is a GENERAL reading, take what resonates and leave and pass on what does not!

***IMAGES ARE NOT MINE***

────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

pile one-

people perceive the resilience that you give out, they are aware that you are not easy to mess with and you aren't as careless as they would have though you are. People often see you as closed off, most likely because of other worries of occurrences in life. You have this courage that is very noticeable and often people see that you are fearless. They see no weakness in you, you will approach life with full confidence and power. Sometimes, you can break your cool but its not because you are needy or arrogant, its because you cant stand unfairness, people notice your ambition to fix a problem especially when it is so obvious. Yeah, you have a very fixed presence and most people can be quite scared to mess up, this can be because of your facial expressions or you could be someone that is hard to impress especially with new people as you don't show your inner self to them yet. Yet you might be seen as someone gullible too. you also can be perceived as someone with their head up high and ignoring their surroundings. This can make it harder for someone to approach you as they see that you are someone who may not be in the mood to talk to people. you may struggle to trust your intuition and you may just take the leap without thinking much of it with the mindset of whatever happens- happens.

first that people notice: your physical health (you may workout or are in great physique), your beauty, your style of clothing (may be very put together and neat), your smile, your limbs.

your vibe to other people:

chic, modest, unbothered, chill, independent, cool, grounded, intellectual, business oriented, career opinionated, vintage, fashion

────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

pile two-

people may not necessarily notice you, this can be that you don't show yourself or you just prefer to observe from afar. Yeah, people notice how you isolate yourself so they rarely see you hence why others don't see you very much. This may also be that every time someone sees you, you may not have changed that much in terms of style, appearance or attitude which may leave them not have a new impression of you. people notice how you are stuck with old patterns. this may not be a bad thing its just what others observe about you. there is lots of loneliness and others may think you are struggling with something but they feel that they cant help you because you wont allow them. they feel useless. you may have lost someone close or these transformative occurrences keep happening so you may be in constant mourning and grief and may not have time to heal. this is not the end of the world though, they may think that you have something that others may want but you are too focused on he negative. you are very good with words. you have a poetic way of speaking and when you do people are fascinated. people notice your way of thinking and how you come up with solutions very easily and quickly. you may write a lot maybe journal and get your worries out on a piece of paper.

first thing that people notice: your walk, your head pieces (may be headband, ribbon, hair clips and whatever else you wear on your head, may even be glasses), your right hand (may wear significant jewellery on that hand, your clothing colours, odd style.

your vibe to other people:

eccentric, colourful, tired, unbothered, baggy clothing, indie, untidy style, unconventional, alternative, eyes blocked/ covered, unapproachable

────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

pile three-

people notice your positive view of the world, you may talk or have relations to other people who like your attitude and they may give you job related opportunities. you have good news with money so people give an impression that you are financially stable. you may not like to be in big groups and may not work as well in a team. this may make you quieter that you are or this may make you feel small and useless. you also may not address problems and keep them in. people usually only hear you speak about the positives in life and they wonder what you truly go through as you don't really address those topics. you are rather serious and don't take things lightly. you can take some things too seriously and people notice that about you. you take whatever you have and make it work for you. you are very vocal about your possessions and are not afraid to show off your ideas and abilities. yet, others notice how you work with whatever you are given and you do it well. you are proud of your creations and skills and are not afraid to use them and show them off. people see you as someone who is very proud of themselves. you are quite flirty in nature, you tend to show off your financial earnings in order to get others attention. you are every good with emotions and others see your empathy and interest through your expressions- this makes you very approachable and friendly. people feel like you are someone who they can trust in the long run. on the other end, you constantly regret your actions from the past which can change your mood completely. you have matured well and others notice that.

first thing that people notice: your creativity, your potential (you seem like someone who is on the path to success), your inspirational nature, your ideas, your fighting nature, your motivation, your hair.

your vibe to other people:

classy, successful, positive, fiery, showing your legs/arms, confident, powerful, smiley, expressive, formal, sexy.

────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

pile four-

you are very hardworking and are always keen to learn and master your skills. people notice how patient you are and very detailed. you take time to get to know something so you will be able to teach someone else. people notice your ability to teach and coach others. you are are very peaceful soul, very laid back and very reserved. you will give others the chance to shine instead of yourself and i feel like only some notice that about you. you sometimes are on the verge of giving up and you are vocal about it. yup, you always give give give. you are the most selfless person that anyone knows. you are so generous that most people can think you are putting up an act but truly you believe that what you give out comes back to you. people notice your curiosity, you may question a lot of things and ask lots of questions to other people. you may also observe and talk about the things others don't care about. you always seek the truth and it may be why you question everything as you wish it would give you answers.

first thing that people notice: your pet (may walk your dog a lot of you may spend time with an animal a lot), your leadership, your vision, your determination, your honesty, your stubbornness, your friendly nature, your structure.

your vibe to other people:

casual, simple, comfortable, easy going, in your own world, warm, natural, open, free, informal, effortless, sincere, not extra, relaxed, placid, flexible.

That is all!! thank you so much for reading, have a good day and i hope something amazing happens today.

#tarotblr #free tarot #tarotcommunity #kpop tarot #tarot cards #pick a card tarot #tarot #tarot pac #tarot pick a card #tarot reading #tarot witch #tarot community #tarot deck #free tarot reading #free readings #free reading #intuitive readings #style #pick a picture #pick a card #pick a pile #pick one #pick a photo #kpop astrology #kpop moodboard #moodboard

[alllgator-blood]

I s2g if you add the layers of these comic pages together, it's over 350 layers. THIS is why I don't do full color for my comics lmaooo- ANYWAY EVERYONE HERE HAS AN AU APPARENTLY, SO THIS IS A BRIEF GLIMPSE INTO MINE. I don't know what to call it yet but I'm thinking of calling it "famous prophets" because 1. I like that car seat headrest song, 2. it's about shamura who is prophetic, 3. it's about trying to outrun fate with the Power of Love (and failing. Like the song!!!). It takes place when all the bishops were teens/kids during the age of hundreds of gods at war, and were trying to survive as a family.

I'm really excited to work on stuff for it but it's all gonna be drawn out of order. Maybe I'll write a full explanation of what it's gonna be about when I have a better idea...I want to channel my eldest sibling angst in a productive way, and maybe establish a QPP between shamura and a completely random npc everyone forgets about <3 also kallamar is trans too cause I said so. I'll do a comic about it eventually. Instead of an absence of gender he has TOO much gender. It simply cannot be contained.

I like that nonbinary genders are normalized in cult of the lamb to the point where nobody singles anyone out for being a they/them, it's not like "THIS IS MY SIBLING SHAMURA. THEY ARE NONBINARY AND USE THEY/THEM. ALRIGHT BACK TO KILLING YOU", it's just like "don't you fucking dare make my poor sibling wake up from their nap to kick your ass. Cause they deserve better than this."

But at the same time I like having the freedom to be more specific, and say "shamura is voidpunk and their gender is best described as the feeling that overtakes you during the first snow of the year, when everything outside is deathly quiet". This comic is actually derived from the time I was walking through a forest that's been torn down for a few years, and came out to my little sister as trans. I must've been like 13 or 14 and she didn't really get it as a 10 year old, but it was better than my mom FREAKING OUT about me coming out. So it was a nice little bonding moment between just the two of us. I don't have a good memory so I don't recall how it went unfortunately...

Now, the climate is a little different. My sis tried out transmasculinity for maybe 5-6 years before feeling happier as a woman, my mom is trying to be Based and flaunt her Woke trans children, and my dad remembered "oh yeah trans natives have existed before colonization. Maybe me being transphobic is a product of my culture being erased" and has gotten better about calling me the right thing. I have a mustache (thanks pcos!!) and wear skirts and am not a repressed "tomboy" teenager anymore. But I can't help but wonder what would've happened if I could've been like shamura and just...been nonbinary without people being fucking weird about it. Or been born as a badass war god who will tear you to shreds before you can perceive my birth sex. I know they're fictional but they are my ultimate gender envy GRRRRR BARK BARK BARK

Here is the secret image for this post- I listen to mostly EDM when I draw cause it keeps the energy up, but as I was finishing up shamura's poetry part, I was like THESE ARE JUST KMFDM LYRICS so I made this

#cotl #cult of the lamb #famous prophets au #alternate universe #shamura #heket #kallamar #narinder #the one who waits #leshy #comic #violence tw #blood tw

[astrophileblogs07]

ASTRO OBSERVATIONS PT.20

⚫ Opposite to the stereotype of Leo being a narcissist, its the Aquarians who are more narcissist than ANY other zodiac. Esp its the Dhanishta naks out of the Aqua naks who are so.

⚫ I have seen 3 Aquarian moons (of Dhanishta nak) who had a poverty stricken first half of life (childhood, teenage years) but then they become well off like rlly very well off in their second half (esp after marriage). They marry rich 🤑 too. What i am saying here is the dramatic transformation of their financial life.

⚫ Pisces men are physically abusive. That's it. Esp the March Pisces. They literally are a bully. (Dont be fooled by the beautiful doe eyes lol)

⚫ "WOW What voluminous and luscious hair he's got!" -my ♌ rising and moon mom commenting on a side character with insignificant role in a movie 🤣. I wasn't noticing that at all...but she seemed to be stuck on that feature 😂.

⚫ Martian influence on a chart can actually have a liking to dangerous weapons and ammunitions. (Like idk I weirdly love them 😂😂)

⚫ Females with Ketu ruled naks are the first group of people whom male perceive as "threat". (Second is mars btw). Like if the other person is a typical male (egoistic, chauvinist) they will literally hate you to the core coz they know you equal them in all ways (except you know what LMAO 🤣). So they'll try to pin you down or belittle you etc. (sad, but since I have experienced I wanted it to share w you guys)

⚫ Also I love the way Ketu Nak women get along becoz mostly they have so much in common. And by that I mean how the society (male dom) treats them. I am not saying they're an "outcast" but the reaction they face just coz the male species get intimidated by us which has an cascading effect on our mental peace is beyond tolerance.

⚫Ketu naks are sexyyyyyy 🖤👁️🫦👁️❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

(I always imagine a smokin hot biker girl 👩🏻‍🎤with leather jacket and smoky eyeshadow whenever I hear "Ashwini, Magha and Mula")

⚫ I have seen a Chart which was totally "Mars" chart and I'll tell you, that person has Aries asc, Moon, Mars and (Mercury ig is in Scorpio?idr) along with Scorpio sun. And that person is like personified version of the planet itself. So cunning and so shrewd, potentially be a mastermind. Statergic. Secretive af. (Might be their middle name to exaggerate). Close to their mom. Loves friends (friends over anything). Also they have a "reddish" tint to their skin (no health probs, but yeah that planet does that). Knows how to tackle any embarrassing moment in public and deal with it. (I am jealous of him coz i wanted to be like him in every way 😂)

⚫Lilith and Pluto aspects in natal chart can actually survive 8H synastry. Almost same energy and themes. 💀

⚫Why are Maghas the "scapegoat" of the family? Like they be framed in a situation with which they have no relation with. Its annoying to see. Its like you're locked in your room chilling and as soon as you step out, everyone in the family is blaming you for something or the other. Now you're the "bad guy". (Yo wtf 🤡). Added to the generosity of Leos, people target you often. 😕

⚫Libra men CANNOT stand loneliness and being ostracized at all in any way. I have seen this in every Libra I came across. For eg: if you're the "black sheep" they won't talk to you and will go with what the crowd says. And if people have outcasted them just becoz they're with you/involved with you, they'll drop you like hot potato. People say and stereotype Capricorns for being the one who cares about reputation and all, but her 'Venus-ruled-Saturn-exalted' sister also is same. 💀

(no wonder they're besties lol)

P.S: I read a post here which said "Eye contact with 8H synastry hits different" ( i am not copying, i don't remember the username) and boy is that true 💀💀💀. Like I was -->😯😳🫣. Coz I have experienced that 🤣🤣. It does, than any other eye contact I have seen. Lmao 🤣🤣.{Edit: its @zeldasnotes 🖤😁}

Hope you liked it 😁😊. Until next time! 👋🏻

Love you y'all ❤️❤️❤️

#astro observations #astro notes #astrology #astroblr #astrology community #astrology observations #astrology notes #natal chart #astrology tumblr #astro community

[eideticallys]

I Don't Mind If It's You

pairing: spencer reid x reader

summary: maybe styling spencer’s hair should be an everyday thing for both of you.

genre: fluff

word count: 1081

author's notes: i missed spencer's long hair so i decided to write a self-indulging fic about playing with his hair. also posted on ao3 (spencereids).

SPENCER HAS ALWAYS FOREGONE STYLING HIS HAIR IN THE MORNINGS. He always thought as long as he could just flick the strands of hair behind his ear, he was good to go. And besides, he had a hair tie with him. He could just simply tie it back—no more pesky hair in his line of sight.

He has always foregone styling his hair in the mornings until he met you. While he was big on practicality & “Hairstyling is a waste of time”!” You were the exact opposite. 

It’s quite a funny thing to think about. Spencer, a certified germaphobe, was uncaring about how his hair looked, whether it was kept well today or it looked like a bird’s nest the next. And then, there’s you. You’re not a germaphobe though you pride yourself as a chic woman. Not a law enforcement job could stop you from looking like you came straight out of a magazine.

You always found the time to make sure your hair looked pretty and presentable before heading to work. In your free time—quite rare for FBI agents—you liked to read magazines for trendy new styles to try or watch videos online for tutorials.

And today was definitely your lucky day. No case. Everyone is off for the holidays.

Unfortunately, that’s where your luck ended.

You got injured during your last case. Your arm is in a cast, unable to move it around like you wanted it to. Fortunately, your hand was still good & thankfully, uninjured, unlike the rest of your arm. So, although you were free to lounge around your home, you couldn’t try that one hairstyle you found in one of those Cosmopolitan articles.

Until a genius idea came to you like a light bulb turning on.

“Hey, Spence?”

You asked your boyfriend, who was busy skimming through what seemed like his third or fourth book of the day.

He’s so cute when he’s all focused like this, you thought. 

He hummed in response, still couldn’t tear his eyes away from the pages.

“I have a favor to ask you.”

This made Spencer look up from what he was reading, staring at you questioningly. You were the type of person who never asked for help or favors—unless needed. You often disagreed with him because he would prefer it if you told him whatever problem you had. Although he was a genius and could help with you, he knew lending an ear to someone was already a big help. 

"You know I can't move my arm around, right?" You asked him, to which he nodded in agreement. 

"Yeah, is it itchy?” He asked, about to go off on one of his notable tangents. “It takes around six to eight weeks for broken bones in casts to heal. Also, around that time, the injured area starts to itch.”

You nodded fondly at the man, not minding a little bit that he went off-topic. You love listening to his mini-lectures—not only do you learn something new, but you’d also hear the soft tone of his voice. One thing about Spencer is he had a pretty voice. You could listen to him talk for hours.

“There are five main reasons why your casts itch—nerves, trapped moisture, immune response, dead skin cells, and body hair.” Spencer continued tattling. “Nerves cause itchiness because the nerve endings in the skin may fire as the cast begins to harden and dry, sending itch-inducing signals to the brain. As for the itchiness being an immune response, it ensues when the body perceives the plaster of Paris or fiberglass as an outside invader. Histamines may be released. Itching, redness, and swelling can be brought on by released histamine.” 

With his excitement to share facts about how broken bones heal, you couldn’t help but laugh at how dorky but adorable your boyfriend was, which made him scrunch his nose.

“I’m rambling, aren’t I?”

“You are, but I don’t mind. I like it.”

At this, Spencer’s ears started turning pink, making you chuckle some more. He scratched the back of his neck in shyness as you took it as a clue to tell him what you needed from him.

“My arm isn’t itchy, babe,” you began, “What I need from you is your hair.”

“My what?” 

“Your hair.” 

It was your turn to get shy. You knew Spencer wasn’t a big fan of having his hair messed with. It’s not that he hates it. He just doesn’t like messing with it that much—minus the occasional flicking behind his ear and simply tying it back when it gets irritating.

“I—um,” you explained further, trying to fight against the embarrassment you were feeling. This was your boyfriend you’re talking to!  “I saw this cute new hairstyle online and I wanted to try it but you know, with the broken arm and all…” You trailed off.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh.” You chuckled humorlessly, beyond embarrassed at this point.

This was such a bad idea. Why did you even bring it up? You were about to start berating yourself, ready to hop onto the next train and create a new identity for yourself, when you noticed Spencer shuffling towards you, sitting on the floor between your legs.

“You want me to style your hair?” You asked incredulously, still can’t believe Spencer would let you play with his hair.

“Of course.” He replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world 

Like it was an everyday thing for anyone—you—to do his hair.

“I don’t mind my hair being played with if it’s you.”

At that, you blushed as you started combing through his soft curls with your fingers. Spencer merely smiled softly at the gesture and closed his eyes.

“Y/N?” Spencer asked quietly.

“Yeah?” You asked back as you started braiding his hair. “What is it, Spence?”

“I love you.” He muttered. “I may not like it when people touch my hair out of nowhere. But if it’s you, I don’t mind having you do it for the rest of my life.”

You gasped at his sudden confession and were about to say those three words back when you felt it.

Spencer planted a kiss on your injured arm and pulled your other one down, so he could be face-to-face with you. And before you knew it, his lips brushed against yours, eyelashes fluttering against your cheeks.

Maybe styling Spencer’s hair should be an everyday thing for both of you.

#criminal minds #criminal minds series #criminal minds fandom #spencer reid #spencer reid fandom #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x self insert #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid scenario #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid blurb #tooth rotting fluff #domestic fluff #criminal minds fluff #established relationship #long-haired spencer reid #mild hurt/comfort

[triassictriserratops]

Would you be able to elaborate on your statement about the pseudo sexual imagery of the Everlark pearl? I hadn’t really considered the pearl from that angle before and would love to hear your thoughts on it.

In response to this post So firstly, this in NO WAY takes away from the other symbolism present in the pearl. This is in ADDITION to, NOT instead of. In fact, lemme go into it all from my perspective, although I know MANY creators have expressed a lot of this much more eloquently than I will! PEARLS AS THEY RELATE TO THE CAPITOL

i always viewed the presence of the pearls on Katniss' capitol wedding dress as twofold. Firstly, it speaks of the opulence and extreme perceived wealth of the Capitol. To have a dress adorned with chains of pearls - what a symbol of luxury! I also viewed them as binding/chains. A representation of the "freedom" of the victors. The trappings of their wealth while living under the thumb of the Capitol. Their chains aren't metal, they're beautiful and delicate but still present and just as deadly. Like a gentle hand on their throats.

PEARLS AS THEY RELATE TO PEETA In direct contrast to the Capitol pearls, the pearl Peeta gives Katniss is singular. It isn't purchased, it is found. It is found in a space where Peeta has nothing else to give to Katniss, other than his life. Instead of a chain or a burden it is meant as his symbol of freedom to her, in conjunction with the locket - "I give you fully back to your family. To the people who love and need you. I let you go, but this, here is something to remember me by." (And I also love how it's representative of Peeta's ability to find pieces of beauty in the most horrific of circumstances.) KATNISS' MENTAL CONNECTION OF PEETA AND THE PEARL We also know that, during Peeta's capture, Katniss connects this pearl heavily with Peeta's life and her need to protect it. "Tomorrow morning, I'm going to agree to be the Mockingjay." I tell her. "Because you want to or because you feel forced into it?" she asks. I laugh a little. "Both, I guess. No. I want to. I have to, if it will help the rebels defeat Snow." I squeeze the pearl more tightly in my fist. "It's just...Peeta. I'm afraid if we do win, the rebels will execute him as a traitor." I slip the pearl from the drawer and spend a second sleepless night clutching it in my hand, replaying Peeta's words in my head. "Ask yourself, do you really trust the people you're working with?" I knot the pearl into the corner of the parachute, bury it deep in the recesses of the bag, as if it's Peeta's life and no one can take it away as long as I guard it. Then, later, when Peeta returns and is found to be hijacked, his essence and personhood taken from him and from HER - the Pearl becomes a symbol of the boy she lost and everything he isn't anymore. Then she finds the pearl Peeta gave me. "Is this-?" "Yeah," I say. "Made it through somehow." I don't want to talk about Peeta. One of the best things about training is, it keeps me from thinking of him. "Haymitch says he's getting better," she says. "Maybe. But he's changed," I say. I consider saying a final good-bye to Peeta, decide it would only be bad for both of us. But I do slip the pearl into the pocket of my uniform. A token of the boy with the bread. And, finally, when in the Capitol, in the last mention of the pearl, we connect it with his literal LIFE in Katniss' HANDS. (And Peeta's unwillingness to risk Katniss' life even for his freedom.) "Should we free his hands?" asks Leeg 1. "No!" Peeta growls at her, drawing his cuffs in close to his body. "No," I echo. "But I want the key." Jackson passes it over without a word. I slip it into my pants pocket, where it clicks against the pearl."

And, finally, here we go: THE PEARL AS IT RELATES TO KATNISS' SEXUAL AWAKENING It is no coincidence, to me, that the pearl is gifted from Peeta to Katniss following the events of the kiss on the beach. Katniss has now admitted to herself that Peeta holds sexual currency with her. Her body is reactive to his own and feeds a hunger in her, a flame. The giving and acceptance of the pearl can be viewed as the "tender" of that sexual currency. Katniss ALSO thinks of the pearl as it relates to Peeta in the ways that Peeta was able to make her PHYSICALLY feel. She connects it with both what she felt with him that night on the beach, and what she HOPES to feel with him upon his return. (And what she misses when he is "lost" to her.) I feel around for the parachute and slide my fingers inside until they close around the pearl. I sit back on my bed cross-legged and find myself rubbing the smooth iridescent surface of the pearl back and forth against my lips. For some reason, it's soothing. A cool kiss from the giver himself. I take the pearl from where it lives in my pocket and try to remember the boy with the bread, the strong arms that warded off nightmares on the train, the kisses in the arena. To make myself put a name to the thing I've lost. But what's the use? It's gone. He's gone. Whatever existed between us is gone.

all I'm saying is that Peeta would literally pass out if he ever hears about how she basically kept rubbing one out in 13 to thoughts of him. (Because, let's be real. That's what the symbolism of the pearl was.) Rolling the pearl between her fingers? Kissing it to her lips? COME ON. It's so on the nose. (Or clit in this case.) 🦪😏

#peeta mellark #katniss everdeen #everlark #the hunger games #thg series #thg #hunger games headcanon #thg headcanons #the hunger games headcanon #thg analysis #the hunger games analysis #hunger games analysis #symbolism of the pearl

[ukiyowi]

How Will You Be Remembered?

Note: I'm in the middle of end sem season which is why I've been so offline and like bad w posting, I hope you like this <33

Read from 1 -> 3

Find more at Masterlist

🌷 Pile 1

Hello Pile 1! I will start this off with don't take it to heart, this is not who you are, just how people may remember you or perceive you after you are gone. You may be remembered as someone who was not afraid of showing your vulnerabilities, some people may see you as weak because of this and remember you as someone who did not take enough risks or played it safe too often to the point of your own detriment. They could think you were someone who lacked confidence and had low self-esteem even though you may have "had it all" so people may remember you as someone who had a lot of potential to do great things.

People would also feel like you were the kind of person who had a lot of problems with self-victimisation or self-sabotage where even if you had resources you felt too scared or restricted, almost powerless because of your own mind. They could have thought that you faked a lot of your problems or blew them out of proportion to seem like you have it really bad, even if this is not the case in reality, (remember what I said earlier). You could also be remembered as someone who had issues with romance or in your domestic life, possibly with your partner where you may have been a little possessive or controlling, some sort of jealousy that gets in the way of you being able to completely devote yourself without even a sliver of doubt towards your partner, yeah people could remember you as someone quite ungrounded in that regard. They may also remember you as someone who had a lot of internal familial problems and disharmony possibly with your kids as well.

However! Not everything’s negative, people would also remember you as someone who celebrated their own achievements and had a lot of inner peace and harmony surrounding them. People may recall you to be a team worker and someone who is very ambitious and sincere when it comes to their work. Also someone extremely generous and willing to share their wealth not only materially but also your knowledge, wisdom, resources, time, etc. You would be remembered for being able to go through cycles of constant change and come out better and brighter on the other side, someone who is very good with leaving the past in the past and not looking back once you move forward. To top it all of you could also be remembered as someone who tries to keep the peace and mediate even if they don't want to, almost as if your hand was being forced every time because you had to carry the responsibility of keeping things civil.

If you like this and want morez buy a reading or tip, if you want at [Paid Readings] and ko-fi.com/taagen respectively.

🌷 Pile 2

Hello pile 2! You will be remembered as someone who is extremely intuitive. Maybe you are spiritual yourself and get bad vibes from people that are often correct (or good vibes), maybe you think or feel something is going to take place and let others know, and are dismissed initially before it turns out you were once again correct. So you would definitely be remembered as that, also someone who is very true to their roots and authentic, you can stay close to your culture and traditions and may even carry out conventions at the most with a twist of your own! People would also remember you as an individual who is very abundant, especially financially. Someone who has their business in different domains and tries to capitalise off of a number of ventures, also someone who starts their own ventures! Yeah, you may leave behind a huge sum of money or capital too, that may be inherited by the people around you so that would instantly have you be remembered as someone who is generous and good with their money, people would think you were the kind who never had any monetary issues that you had to face growing up or during your young adult ages even if it may not be true to reality.

You'd also be remembered as someone who is very bright, shines in whatever they do, and someone who may be the mood maker. Like the glue in friendships or workplaces, you would be remembered as someone who connects people with each other, like if you have a friend, and you introduce them to someone else, then those two people become friends even if you drift apart from them, you know what I mean? A little specific however, something that is coming through strongly. You may be remembered as a mentor figure too, like wise and knowledgeable, someone very open to helping others even if it does not benefit you in any way.

Now, some people may also remember you as indecisive, or someone who lacked commitment and that you were shrouded in self-doubt. They could also think that you may have knowingly or unknowingly indulged in gossip that could have been malicious in nature and that you may end up victimising yourself even if you have wronged someone else, you may be recalled as a figure in people's lives where you wronged them, but they had to bear the weight of all the consequences. Some could also think you were apathetic to a large extent and dispassionate about things when alive, that you did not use the resources and talents you may have had productively because of repeating negative cycles of laziness and procrastination which could lead you to not complete projects or meet deadlines.

If you like this and want morez buy a reading or tip, if you want at [Paid Readings] and ko-fi.com/taagen respectively.

🌷 Pile 3

Pile 3 you've got some goo d cards! You may have a lot of people around you and a lot of good friendships/family members and connections in your life who appreciate you because wow! People would remember you as a family person, someone who was very close to their relatives and had the kind of family that one would dream of having. Your children may carry some sort of your legacy as well where they may become very well known, and you would be remembered through them. People would also think that during the course of your life you were someone who got very lucky with marriage or finding your partner, so a lot of how you are remembered also come from your family like your relations with them, maybe your partner as well.

You could also be remembered as someone who is very active when it comes to social justice. Someone who always stands up for what they believe in even if you are in the absolute minority, but this could also come with people thinking you have a way of being forceful and pushy when it comes to wanting what you want, especially when it comes to arguments or conflicts. You may also be remembered as someone who used to challenge convention and play by your own rules.

There is so much familial stuff here, how you'd be remembered for being nurturing and playing a motherly role (regardless of gender) for the people around you as well. Also, remembered as being very confident in your own convictions and being extremely optimistic, like you could have helped people around you look at the brighter side as well.

Okay so this is a little aside, but it was a strong intuitive message that people could also remember you as someone who is accepting of new challenges no matter what, even if it is something that you may not have resources to completely pass obstacles. Also, someone who has a lot of turbulence in their life and ups and downs that may have pushed you to the edge, but this could be taken as inspirational for people, like seeing you go through so much and still make a good life for yourself could make people believe they can do the same, so you could also be remembered in a light of you being an inspiration.

Now moving on, you could lastly be remembered as someone who was not able to fulfil your true passions in your life and someone who could have passed without getting to nurture your inner child enough because of how busy you were nurturing the people around you.

If you like this and want morez buy a reading or tip, if you want at [Paid Readings] and ko-fi.com/taagen respectively.

Do not plagiarise copy or reword, all rights reserved to Ukiyowi©®

#tarot readings #tarot reading #pick a pile #pick a card #pac #pick a card reading #pick a pile reading #tarot deck #tarot #tarot cards #tarot community #tarot commissions #Spotify

[aerahyasashi]

IDIOSYNCRASIES CHAPTER TWO

Yandere! Suguru Geto x Fem! Gojo's Sister! Reader

Sypnosis: Where suguru geto founds himself deeply enamored with satoru's non-sorcerer sister to the point of obsession.

Warnings: Yandere stuff, Gore, Violence, Foul language, Abuse.

Note: this isn't a oneshot, I'm gonna post every part of this soon, this is a fanfic and i originally posted this on quotev. I'm still learning on how to use tumblr so the aesthetic might be a lil shitty😭😭 also, feel free to make a request! May it be an hc or a oneshot! Just no incest please.

Chapter One

Chapter Three

Chapter four and five

Chapter six and seven

•───癖好───•

EYES TINTED IN A shade of black, akin to the color of an obsidian, grew wide if ever so slightly upon hearing those words come out from the lips of the [H/c] haired girl that was perched beside him.

Suguru found himself in a state of uncertainty, unsure of how to react to the situation unfolding before him.

Naturally, he knew that she, being a member of the gojo clan, would have knowledge about curses. However, what truly astonished him was not her awareness of curses, but rather her ability to actually see them.

Ordinary individuals like her lacked the cursed energy necessary to perceive or interact with curses. This meant that they were incapable of seeing them altogether. While it was true that some non-sorcerers could see curses with the aid of cursed tools, this girl appeared to possess no such tools.

But what fascinated Suguru even more was her nonchalance about it.

“Mmm, so you can see curses as well, then..” Suguru murmured, his brows furrowing slightly as he pondered how she was able to see curses and why she appeared so nonchalant about it.

It was almost as if she had grown accustomed to the sight of curses, as though it were an everyday occurrence. 

“Yeah, I can,” she nodded, confirming Suguru's suspicion. 

With a light laugh escaping her lips, she continued to gaze at the curse enveloping the tree, never once diverting her attention away from it.  The curse itself was an abhorrent sight, ugly and grotesque and bloated, akin to a misshapen ball of red orange-colored flesh. It bore numerous eyes and extended multiple limb-like appendages in front of it, resembling a fusion of a sea urchin with having the human arms as its spike.

The fact that she remained nonchalant whilst perceiving this abomination was both astonishing and captivating to Suguru. Her ability to remain unfazed in the face of such abnormalities was truly unique, showcasing her idiosyncratic nature.  

Suguru hummed quietly to himself, finding the situation rather peculiar.

“Sort of weird if you ask me.”

“Strange isn't it?” she arched an eyebrow with a smile as she posed that question to the black haired man.

“Yeah, strange,”

She smirked at him.

“I bet you thought that i can't see curses.”

she responded by giving him an almost cocky smirk, to which he simply chuckled softly. In a low tone, he murmured.

“You won the bet then”

Suguru chuckled as the banter between them subsided for a moment. He then placed his palms in front of her eyes, effectively obstructing her view of the curse that was on the tree. He observed the curse intently as he raised his other hand and pointed it on the direction of the curse.

“Geto-san?” she muttered under her breath, perplexed as her brows drew together slightly.

“What are you doing?”

From the corner of her eye, a faint bluish light sparked, causing her to flinch uneasily.

“Just don't want you to see the curse getting... distorted.” he explained as the curse became distorted and slowly formed into a ball. The small black sphere that had peculiar orange smudges was now on his hand, signifying his successful capture of the curse. 

“Wouldn't be fair of me to subject you to such a sight,” he added,  finally removing his hand from in front of her eyes. As she blinked and inclined her head, her gaze fell upon the tree, and the curse had mysteriously vanished. 

Puzzled, she turned to him and inquired,

“Where did it go?” Searching for answers, she observed him with a look of confusion. 

“It's in a place of insignificance,” suguru responded nonchalantly. Furrowing her brows in response, she muttered,

“How informative, Geto-san.” [Name] smiled, slightly amused by his vague statement. Suguru casually shrugged, dismissing the importance of the curse's whereabouts. 

“It's not crucial to know where it has been relocated,” suguru asserted, causing [Name] to raise an eyebrow. He noticed a faint sparkle in her eyes, perhaps from in awe, or amusement?

[Name] on the other hand was pondering whether suguru is as strong as her brother, because she presumed that suguru had exorcised the curse or something. Realizing her curiosity, she mumbled.

“I see,” [Name] restrained herself from directly asking about the curse’s exorcism as her [E/c] eyes locked with Suguru's dark orbs.

“Why don't you want me to see the curse?” she inquired, genuinely curious about his reason.

“I have witnessed far worse than that,” [Name] added, causing him to raise an eyebrow.

“Doesn't mean that y’should be exposed to yet another disturbing sight,” he replied, flashing a warm smile that caused a faint blush to tint [Name]'s cheeks.

“I suppose you're right,” [Name] conceded with a slight laugh, shifting her position slightly due to awkwardness.

“Still, It's quite extraordinary,” Suguru remarked, a hint of amusement lacing his scoff.

“...It's  the first time I've come across a non-sorcerer who can see curses.”

“That's quite... unusual.” He added.

“Do you find it uncommon?” she inquired, tilting her head slightly sideways as Suguru acknowledged by nodding and resting his head upon his hand.

“Yeah, unusual.”

“Really unusual... especially if that non-sorcerer is someone who is so nonchalant about it,” he murmured, alluding to her fearless demeanor.

“Most people would've freaked out upon seeing those” Trying to conceal the spherical ball, the young man fumbled with his uniform, trying to find where to hide it and intending to save it for later consumption.

In response, she calmly remarked,

“I'm used to it” a subtle smile gracing her lips. He emitted a soft hum in acknowledgement. Curiosity got the better of him, forcing him to breach the subject.

“It's because you're a member of the gojo clan, isn't it?” he inquired, tilting his head slightly. Suguru wasn't keen on admitting it, but engaging in conversation with this newly acquainted girl proved surprisingly pleasant. Eventually, he managed to find a suitable place on his uniform to hide the sphere, carefully concealing it there. 

Her response was understated yet affirmative.

“Yes, i suppose I am,” she replied.

“You’re a jujutsu sorcerer, right, geto-san?” She  inquired, and he nodded.

“I am”

“Figured it out,” she replied. 

Reinvigorated, suguru rose to his feet.

“Once again, it was nice to meet you, Gojo-san,” he expressed with a smile, extending his hand for a handshake.

Despite his desire to continue their conversation, Suguru recognized the need to depart, as his mission had finally reached its conclusion. It was a shame, because he liked talking to her.

Although hesitant at first, she eventually took his hand, intertwining her fingers with his and reciprocating the gesture as she gave him a firm handshake, but [Name] was disappointed since she still wanted to talk to suguru more.

“Likewise, Geto-san,”

she warmly echoed, a smile adorning her face. Certainly, she was aware that Satoru would become angry with her for engaging in conversation with a stranger. This anger stemmed from his concern for her safety, as Satoru despised witnessing any harm come to his beloved sister.

Nevertheless, she pondered if Satoru would remain oblivious to the interaction if she simply chose not to disclose it to him, and she hoped so, cause he'd probably go ballistic upon finding out that she had not only talked to a stranger, but she even made physical contact with them.

She had lied to Satoru on numerous occasions in the past, and although it may not have been the initial instance, her intentions were always for the greater benefit.

A concrete example of this was when Satoru inquired about her black eye, to which she fabricated a response, claiming that she had merely stumbled and toppled down the stairs. However, this was merely a cover-up for the truth, for their pathetic excuse of a family had hit her.

Suguru on the other hand inclined his head slightly, observing the way their fingers were intertwined. He couldn't help but notice that [Name]'s hands were smaller and delicate, adorned with a cute [F/c] shade of nail polish.

Her soft hands were in stark contrast to his own calloused hand, which hinted at the laborious nature of his work. 

As he observed her, Suguru couldn't help but feel a sense of amusement at this peculiar idiosyncrasy of hers—getting lost in her thoughts even during a simple gesture like a handshake. 

Awkwardness began to creep into Suguru's demeanor as the seconds ticked by. Thirty seconds had passed, yet [Name] continued to hold onto his hand, defying the conventional brevity of a handshake. He found himself growing increasingly awkward in this unexpected situation. With a polite clearing of his throat, Suguru softly spoke,

“Gojo-san, are you alright?” Suguru inquired, his concerned eyes meeting hers. [Name], slightly taken aback, blinked and immediately released her grip on his hand.

Apologetically, she mumbled an explanation while nervously rubbing the muscles on the back of her neck.

“Sorry, I spaced out. Were you saying something?” she asked, her words punctuated by awkwardness. Suguru shook his head, responding with a gentle, closed-eye smile.

“It's fine, and no,” he reassured her.  

Suguru then directed his attention towards her face, her eyes, her nose, and her lips, observing every detail. It was evident to him that she wasn't wearing any lipstick, just a simple lip balm.

However, despite the lack of any noticeable alteration, he could still discern it. In that moment, as if her actions were prompted by his gaze, she bit her lip.

This seemingly innocent gesture ended up causing the scab on the previously split lip to crack open, resulting in some blood seeping into her mouth and eventually trickling down her chin.

“Gojo-san. You're bleeding...”

A concerned expression formed on Suguru's face as he observed her touching her lips, noticing how her jaw clenched ever so slightly.

“That's..” [Name] trailed off, eyebrows knitting together.

The previous efforts by Satoru to clean up the area were now rendered useless due to the reopening of the wound and it made [Name] annoyed at herself slightly.

“May i?” Suguru asked and [Name] was confused as she continued touching the blood, she nodded nonetheless, not really knowing what suguru meant

“I suppose,” she replied.

Suguru retrieved a handkerchief out of nowhere swiftly, placing a hand on her chin to gently lift her gaze. With careful movements, he proceeded to wipe away the blood from her lip.

The once pristine white fabric of the handkerchief now bore the mark of her blood. As Suguru cleaned the area, [Name] appeared frozen, rooted in place. Her heart raced within her chest, its relentless beats quickening in response to this unexpected action .

The tenderness when Suguru removed the blood was slight more tender and gentler than satoru's.

Once Suguru had completed the task of wiping away every trace of blood, a subtle rosy hue tinged [Name]'s cheek, indicating her embarrassment.

“You shouldn't nibble on your lip, Gojo-san. It will impede the healing process.”

“Thank you...” [Name] said with a shy smile and suguru nodded as he folded the handkerchief neatly.

“You helped me too, so it's only fair for me to repay the favor,” Suguru replied appreciatively, recalling the time when she selflessly offered him some delightful candies that provided relief and served as a diversion from the repulsive flavor of the curse he had ingested.  

“Oh..” [Name] mumbled as her blush finally subsided. “I see..”

“Thank you for the sweets, and it was truly pleasurable conversing with you, Gojo-san.” Hoping for another encounter in the near future, Suguru mumbled,

“I hope our paths will cross again soon.” Displaying a genuine smile, she replied.

“So do i...” Amused, he chuckled softly, accompanied by a closed-eyed smile.

“glad to hear that the sentiment is mutual then.” Suguru chuckled softly yearning to prolong their interaction. However, duty beckoned, demanding his attention.

“Take care of yourself, Gojo-san.”

•───癖好───•

When Satoru finally found [Name] after walking like 2 hours in the city, Satoru embraced [Name] so tightly that she felt as though she couldn't breathe. In a state of panic, he clung onto her even more, causing her to struggle for air and adding to her discomfort. 

“Damn it, ‘toru nii-chan! ‘ts too tight!” [Name] whined at Satoru, pleading for him to loosen his grip. He immediately complied, but still held onto her, finding solace in the comfort of her embrace. Nestling his head in the crook of her neck, he exhaled warm breath against her skin.

“I thought i lost you!”

“look... ‘toru.. ‘m fine, and you're overreacting...”

Trying to reassure him, [Name] affirmed that she was alright. 

“Don't care, didn't asked,”

Satoru scoffed, his worry pouring out as he uttered a grumble. Disregarding her attempt to convince him of her safety, he continued to express his concerns, pulling away from her neck and fixating his gaze on her.

“Where on earth were you?” he asked as he cradled her face in his hands. 

Annoyed by his overprotective nature, [Name] muttered under her breath.

“Satoru, You left me here to get food.” The sudden realization struck Satoru, leaving him dumbfounded. 

Repeating her words in disbelief, Satoru blinked in confusion. “I left you here to get food?” he exclaimed, astonished by his own forgetfulness.

“I did?”

His gaze met [Name]'s disapproving look, silently expressing her disapproval. [Name] positioned her hand on her hip, fixing her gaze upon him, tilting her head slightly and squinting her eyes as she displayed a hint of annoyance.    

“Could it be possible that you actually forgot about it?” She muttered under her breath, contemplating if that could be the reason for Satoru's prolonged absence. Perhaps he simply forgot the arrangement and ended up getting lost along the way.

Huffing audibly, [Name] averted her gaze, pondering whether she should disclose the encounter she had with Suguru earlier, but ultimately opting to keep it to herself, cause honesty be damned, satoru would go bawl his eyes out and have a mental break down that teenagers mostly has at 10pm when he finds out that someone else had took care of her injuries. And he would probably be angry too. And [Name] wasn't risking it.

“You assured me it would only be a brief absence, yet you ended up being gone for a staggering two hours. It's fortunate that none of our clan members caught sight of me waiting here” She reproached him, causing him to direct a scowl towards the ground.  

“Brat. why didn't you tell me earlier?” he grumbled

“That was what i am trying to tell you, brother.” she sighed, exasperated.

Satoru abruptly turned away and slumped to the ground, curling up into a ball with his knees pressed against his face and sulked like a child.

[Name] was flabbergasted because they were in public.

“Why the hell are you sulking?...” she gawked. 

“Are you being for real right now...?”

[Name] was beginning to experience feelings of guilt, mixed with a sense of embarrassment, due to Satoru's actions. 

“Satoru. get up.”

“Leave me alone.” Satoru grumbled pettily and [Name]'s eye twitched.

“Look satoru, I'm not mad at you for forgetting, so get up.” She sighed, feeling exasperated.

“Toru... ‘m sorry... get up f’me, would ya?”

As she approached Satoru, [Name] mumbled apologetically, urging him to get up from his sulking position. 

Satoru remained silent and continued to sulk, ignoring [Name]'s pleas. 

Desperate for him to snap out of his mood, [Name] whined, “Please, Satoru, get up!... nii-chan.. get up!” Unfortunately for her, he simply huffed and averted his gaze. 

“I will only get up if you carry me,” he stubbornly declared.

“...” [Name] was flabbergasted. ain't no fucking way did satoru just requested her to carry him.

“What.” [Name] looked at him dumbly.

“Carry your nii-chan.”  satoru replied stubbornly with a pout.

“No,” she responded firmly.

“...You don't love me anymore, do you?”

Satoru's accusation caught [Name] off guard, and her jaw tightened in frustration. Defensively, she clarified her feelings, “I do still have love you, thank you very much.” However, Satoru persisted, attempting to provoke an argument with her.

“Oh yeah? bet you wouldn't love me if i was a—”

she quickly interrupted him, refusing to engage in such discourse. With a tinge of annoyance in her voice, she spoke .

“No, i would still love you if you were a worm.” A heavy sigh escaped her lips, as she felt a wave of exasperation wash over her. she wasn't surprised by her brother's predictable response.

“Then carry me.” Satoru declared. [Name] looked at him incredulously and responded,

“Satoru, you do realize that you are taller and heavier than me, don't you?”

Satoru shrugged off her concerns and confidently stated,

“So?”

“Satoru, i can't—”

“You can, and you will.” He asserted.

[Name] was exasperated and just decided to give in.

“Fine!”

Feeling apprehensive about her ability to lift him, [Name] sighed. However, she knew she had a certain level of physical strength.

“If that's what it takes,” she reluctantly agreed, crouching down as Satoru beamed with joy. satoru then hopped onto her back enthusiastically.

“Fuck... nii-chan, you're heavy.”

[Name] grimaced under the weight, yet Satoru wrapped his arms around her neck and his legs around her waist. The sight was weird as fuck and [Name] was glad that there's no one that can see them doing weird shits, given that Satoru stood at least 6'3 tall, while [Name] was shorter and comparatively smaller.

Moreover, Satoru's weight made the situation even more challenging for her and [Name] grimaced, her legs wobbling.

“S-satoru... i think that you should get down,” she managed to state, her voice filled with strain. [Name] let out a shriek as she lost balance and fell on the ground along with satoru.

•───癖好───•

EXTRA:

—Gojo forgot to buy food too because he was too busy panicking on finding [Name].

—Geto wants more of the candy [Name] had given him but refrained from asking for more

—Geto is curious about how [Name] got her busted up lip but refrained from asking

—Gojo acts like a child when he's with [Name]

Support me in Wattpad?🥺

#yandere jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #jjk x you #yandere geto #yandere gojo #yandere suguru geto #yandere satoru gojo #yandere #yandere x you #yandere x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen season 2

[celluloidbroomcloset]

I came across a few posts noting that Ed should not have told Stede not to kill Ned Low, which got me thinking...

I don't really agree with that. That entire scene, both Ed's decision and Stede's decision, is complicated with a lot of different things, but none of them quite so much as the shared knowledge, and pain, of both men. (Yeah, I'm not capable of not writing an essay.)

Stede is the only one who knows about Ed's father. Ed tells himself-as-Hornigold that he never told anyone about killing his father, and Hornigold reminds him: "But you did, though, didn't you? And he left you." Stede is also the only one who knows Ed really doesn't kill - that he, by his own admission, outsources the killing to others. The murder of his father is the center of Ed's self-loathing, and is the thing that he relates, in his conversation with Hornigold, most directly to Stede leaving him.

Low's insults don't affect Ed much; he's heard them before, he knows what's behind them. But Stede has been watching Low hurt people and things he loves - Ed, the crew, the ship itself - without being able to do anything about it. He successfully uses his "people positive management style" to get Low's crew to turn on him, but the problem of Low himself remains and cannot be eliminated in the same way.

Low calling Ed a "lowborn dirtbag" is what finally makes Stede snap, and one could argue that his response is more or less automatic. It's certainly emotional. There's nothing he could say to Low to put him in his place, as he did with the aristocrats in "Dressing Well." It wouldn't work; he cannot meet Low on a level playing field and use the same weapons against him, because Low's whole thing is being a bully and Stede is not a bully. Everyone, including Ed, is surprised when Stede actually draws his sword. But by the time he's done it, there's no going back.

Low obviously reads people quite well, and like many bullies he can suss out the places that will hurt others the most - he knows that torturing Stede will hurt Ed more than torturing Ed. He knows that insulting Ed will hurt Stede more than anything he could say to Stede himself. And he hits on Stede's fears about his masculinity and especially Ed's feelings about him. Low is another in a long line of bullies (Nigel, Chauncey, his father) from Stede's class, and he manages to hit exactly the sore spot, the fear that Ed only loves Stede because of his "bumbling amateur status."

Stede absolutely believes the things that others say about him. In the moment, Stede reads Ed's statement not to kill Low in exactly the way that Low wants him to - as a desire to keep him docile, pure, a pet. Not a real pirate, not a real man. He struggles with it - having gone so far as to hold Low at swordpoint and to force him onto the plank, it's hard to back down. His crew egg him on - Low does indeed deserve to die for what he's done. But when Stede kills Low, to the cheers of the crew, no one but the audience can see his face - the horror and shock at what he's done, as the memories of his childhood shoot across his mind.

As soon as Stede's actually committed the murder, he realizes the true meaning behind Ed's words, and it's this, combined with the shock of having truly, directly, and deliberately killed a man, that sends him running back to his cabin. Stede sees himself as a child, the boy who just wanted to pick flowers, splattered with blood from "men's work." He cannot go back now; he's made a choice, and he murdered a man. He does exactly what he's done each time his own shame has become too much for him, and hides himself.

But when Ed comes to his room, he directly relates it to his own trauma - "I was a wreck after my first kill as well. Well, it was my dad..." He's there not to shame Stede either for his violence or for his self-perceived weakness, but to be present for him.

That traumatic past is part of what unites them. Stede was forced to witness death and was told it was what men do; Ed committed murder, and has been haunted by it ever since. Ed sees the potential of the same thing happening to Stede - being so overcome with guilt and shame at actively committing murder that he suppresses and remakes his self to avoid coping with the horror of what he has done. It doesn't matter that Stede is a grown man and Ed was a child; Ed knows how badly it can warp someone, and Ed knows better than anyone how the abused child becomes the traumatized man. He tries to warn Stede first, recalling their past, and then he shows up for Stede in a way that no one did, or could, for him - not until Stede himself extended his hand and said, "I'm your friend." Ed is there at the door within minutes, asking if Stede is OK, offering his support, not letting him hide alone if he needs someone to hold him.

I've said a lot about the progress from the moment Ed appears at the door to the moment Stede closes the curtain here, but again I don't think it should be read as Stede proving his masculinity or Ed feeling sorry for him. Sex is not being treated frivolously here, either by the show or by the characters. It is an outpouring of pain and grief and deep, intense love between two men who understand each other's suffering at a fundamental level, who have shared things with each other that no one else knows, and who see all of each other, the darkness as well as the light.

#ofmd season 2 #ofmd #our flag means death #gif #stede bonnet #ed teach #edward teach #rhys darby #taika waititi #calypso's birthday #gentlebeard #ned low #ofmd meta #blackbonnet #ofmd stede #ed x stede #yes i included the kiss again because whatever i do what i want #someone pay me to write a book about how this show picks apart toxic masculinity and male trauma and i'll do it

[ao3commentoftheday]

Hello there! This question isn’t so much about popularity as it is about feeling lonely in fandom spaces. I’m in a relatively small fandom where it’s easy to “run into” the same users who write fanfic and draw fanart a lot. Over the years I’ve tried doing all the usual things to make fandom friends, like commenting a LOT on fanfic when new works are posted, being friendly in my author’s notes, being friendly on tumblr, complimenting artists works and reblogging and just generally trying to share the love so to speak.

People will reblog my art on here, but on AO3 I tend to get crickets on most of my stuff. Especially on fics for my OTP. My OTP is notttt popular in the fandom. It’s actually a lot of people’s NOTP because it “takes away” from the canon couple. I’ve accepted a long time ago that I’m going to get less readers because of the shipping stuff alone. But even on my works that aren’t shipping focused at all, it’s just crickets.

It just kinda sucks to try so hard to make fandom buddies and see them all having fun together and constantly feel like the kid sitting alone in the corner. I keep wondering if people in the fandom don’t like my fics just because of the shipping thing because I know I’m not a bad writer. But like I said, I’ve tried reaching out to people, be encouraging and show joy at what they create, but I just keep wondering what I’m doing wrong to make fellow fans not want to be friends with me. I’ve been focusing on just doing my own thing but yeah, it sucks not having anybody to fangirl with.

First of all anon, *hugs*. Being lonely sucks, and I'm sorry to hear you're in that situation.

When it comes to the other folks in your fandom, I don't think it's necessarily that they don't want to be friends with you. I think you might just need to do a little extra legwork to get in the friendship door.

It's not really fair, but it is kind of human nature, that if there is a perceived difference with someone else, we tend to keep them at a bit of a distance. It doesn't mean we dislike them! It just means that it takes more effort for us to get past that difference and see them as a friend. The more we do it, of course, the easier it gets and you might not even notice the hiccup anymore - in person.

You're probably in the "acquaintance zone," if you'll allow me to use the phrase. People probably have a generally positive impression of you because you're nice and you're friendly and you're encouraging. But if most of their conversations are happening in a ship-centric venue, for example, then you're not going to have access to the full spectrum of community with them.

You mention that other folks see your OTP as a NOTP. Do you feel the same way in reverse? They might assume that you do, and that's what's keeping you out of those convos. If you actually don't mind their ship and simply prefer your own, you could always attempt to make a foray in that direction? Let them know you don't mind being exposed to their shipping talk?

Another thing you could try would be to identify the multishippers. In my experience, those are the folks who are most open to befriending folks who don't ship the main pairing. They can see possibilities all over the place, and they're happy to be exposed to new ideas.

Small fandoms can be rough when you're into a niche part of it ❤️ Let's see how others handle your situation.

You can also find this question and answer on Dreamwidth.

#asks and answers

[mengjue]

What's Happening in China? The November 2022 Protests

Hello! I know that there's so much going on in the world right now, so not everyone may be aware of what is happening in China right now. I thought that I would try to write a brief explainer, because the current wave of protests is truly unprecedented in the past 30+ years, and there is a lot of fear over what may happen next. For context, I'm doing this as someone who has a PhD in Asian Studies specialising in contemporary Chinese politics, so I don't know everything but I have researched China for many years.

I'll post some decent links at the end along with some China specialists & journalists I follow on Twitter (yeah I know, but it's still the place for the stuff at the moment). Here are the bullet points for those who just want a brief update:

Xi Jinping's government is still enacting a strict Zero Covid policy enforced by state surveillance and strict lockdowns.

On 24 November a fire in an apartment in Urumqi, Xinjiang province, killed 10. Many blamed strict quarantine policies on preventing evacuation.

Protests followed and have since spread nationwide.

Protesters are taking steps not seen since Tiananmen in 1989, including public chants for Xi and the CCP to step down.

Everyone is currently unsure how the government will respond.

More in-depth discussion and links under the cut:

First a caveat: this is my own analysis/explanation as a Chinese politics specialist. I will include links to read further from other experts and journalists. Also, this will be quite long, so sorry about that!

China's (aka Xi Jinping's) Covid Policy:

The first and most important context: Xi has committed to a strict Zero Covid policy in China, and has refused to change course. Now, other countries have had similar approaches and they undoubtedly saved lives - I was fortunate to live in New Zealand until this year, and Prime Minister Ardern's Zero Covid approach in 2020-2021 helped protect many. The difference is in the style/scope of enforcement, the use of vaccines, and the variant at play. China has stepped up its control on public life over the past 10 years, and has used this to enforce strict quarantine measures without full regard to the impact on people's lives - stories of people not getting food were common. Quarantine has also become a feared situation, as China moves people to facilities often little better than prisons and allegedly without much protection from catching Covid within. A personal friend in Zhengzhou went through national, then provincial, then local quarantines when moving back from NZ, and she has since done her best to avoid going back for her own mental and physical health. Xi has also committed China to its two home-grown vaccines, Sinovac and Sinopharm, both of which have low/dubious efficacy and are considered ineffective against new variants. Finally, with delta and then omicron most of the Zero-Covid countries have modified their approach due to the inability to maintain zero cases. China remains the only country still enacting whole-city eradication lockdowns, and they have become more frequent to the point that several are happening at any given time. The result is a population that is incredibly frustrated and losing hope amidst endless lockdowns and perceived ineffectiveness to address the pandemic.

Other Issues at Play:

Beyond the Covid situation, China is also wrestling with the continued slowdown in its economic growth. While its economic rise and annual GDP growth was nigh meteoric from the 80s to the 00s, it has been slowing over the past ten years, and the government is attempting to manage the transition away from an export-oriented economy to a more fully developed one. However, things are still uncertain, and Covid has taken its toll as it has elsewhere the past couple of years. Youth unemployment in particular is reaching new highs at around 20%, and Xi largely ignored this in his speech at the Party Congress in October (where he entered an unprecedented third term). As a result of the perceived uselessness of China's harsh work culture and its failure to result in a better life, many young Chinese have been promoting 躺平 tǎng píng or "lying flat", aka doing the bare minimum just to get by (similar to the English "quiet quitting"). The combination of economic issues and a botched Covid approach is important, as these directly affect the lives of ordinary middle-class Chinese, and historical it has only been when this occurred that mass movements really took off. The most famous, Tiananmen in 1989, followed China's opening up economic reforms and the dismantling of many economic safety nets allowing for growing inequality. While movements in China often grow to include other topics, having a foundation in something negatively impacting the average Han Chinese person's livelihood is important.

The Spark - 24 Nov 2022 Urumqi Apartment Fire:

The current protests were sparked by a recent fire that broke out in a flat in Urumqi, capital of the Xinjiang province. (This is the same Xinjiang that is home to the Uighur people, against whom China has enacted a campaign of genocide and cultural destruction.) The fire occurred in the evening and resulted in 10 deaths, which many online blamed on the strict lockdown measures imposed by officials, who prevented people from leaving their homes. It even resulted in a rare public apology by city officials. However, with anger being so high nationwide, in addition to many smaller protests that have occurred over the past two years, this incident has ignited a nationwide movement.

The Protests and Their Significance:

The protests that have broken out over the past couple of days representing the largest and most significant challenge to the leadership since the 1989 Tiananmen movement. Similar to that movement, these protests have occurred at universities and cities across the country, with many students taking part openly. This scale is almost unseen in China, particularly for an anti-government protest. Other than Tiananmen in 1989, the most widespread movements that have occurred have been incidents such as the protest of the 1999 Belgrade bombings or the 2005 and then 2012 anti-Japanese protests, all of which were about anger toward a foreign country.

Beyond the scale the protests are hugely significant in their message as well. Protesters are publicly shouting the phrases "习近平下台 Xí Jìnpíng xiàtái!" and "共产党 下台 Gòngchǎndǎng xiàtái!", which mean "Xi Jinping, step down/resign!" and "CCP, step down/resign!" respectively. To shout a direct slogan for the government to resign is unheard of in China, particularly as Xi has tightened control of civil society. And people are doing this across the country in the thousands, openly and in front of police. This is a major challenge for a leader and party who have prioritised regime stability as a core interest for the majority of their history.

Looking Ahead:

Right now, as of 15:00 Australian Eastern time on Monday, 28 November 2022, the protests are only in their first couple of days and we are unsure as to how the government will respond. Police have already been seen beating protesters and journalists and dragging them away in vehicles. However, in many cases the protests have largely been monitored by police but still permitted to occur. There seems to be uncertainty as to how they want to respond just yet, and as such no unified approach.

Many potential outcomes exist, and I would warn everyone to be careful in overplaying what can be achieved. Most experts I have read are not really expecting this to result in Xi's resignation or regime change - these things are possible, surely, but it is a major task to achieve and the unity & scale of the protest movement remains to be fully seen. The government may retaliate with a hard crackdown as it has done with Tiananmen and other protests throughout the years. It may also quietly revamp some policies without publicly admitting a change in order to both pacify protesters and save face. The CCP often uses mixed tactics, both coopting and suppressing protest movements over the years depending on the situation. Changing from Zero Covid may prove more challenging though, given how much Xi has staked his political reputation on enforcing it.

What is important for everyone online, especially those of us abroad, is to watch out for the misinformation campaign the government will launch to counter these protests. Already twitter is reportedly seeing hundreds of Chinese bot accounts mass post escort advertisements using various city names in order to drown out protest results in the site's search engine. Chinese officials will also likely invoke the standard narrative of Western influence and CIA tactics as the reason behind the protests, as they did during the Hong Kong protests.

Finally, there will be a new surge of misinformation and bad takes from tankies, or leftists who uncritically support authoritarian regimes so long as they are anti-US. An infamous one, the Qiao Collective, has already worked to shift the narrative away from the protests and onto debating the merits of Zero Covid. This is largely similar to pro-Putin leftists attempting the justify his invasion of Ukraine. Always remember that the same values that you use to criticise Western countries should be used to criticise authoritarian regimes as well - opposing US militarism and racism, for example, is not incompatible with opposing China's acts of genocide and state suppression. If you want further info (and some good sardonic humour) on the absurd takes and misinfo from pro-China tankies, I would recommend checking out Brian Hioe in the links below.

Finally, keep in mind that this is a grass-roots protest made by people in China, who are putting their own lives at risk to demonstrate openly like this. There have already been so many acts of bravery by those who just want a better future for themselves and their country, and it is belittling and disingenuous to wave away everything they are doing as being just a "Western front" or a few "fringe extremists".

Links:

BBC live coverage page with links to analysis and articles

ABC (Australia) analysis

South China Morning Post analysis

Experts & Journalists to Check Out:

Brian Hioe - Journalist & China writer, New Bloom Magazine

Bonnie Glaser - China scholar, German Marshall Fund

Vicky Xu - Journalist & researcher, Australian Strategic Policy Institute

Stephen McDonnell - Journalist, BBC

M Taylor Fravel - China scholar, MIT

New Zealand Contemporary China Research Centre - NZ's hub of China scholarship (I was fortunate to attend their conferences during my PhD there, they do great work!)

If you've reached the end I hope this helps with understanding what's going on right now! A lot of us who know friends and whanau in China are worried for their safety, so please spread the word and let's hope that there is something of a positive outcome ahead.

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