#I’m gonna have a word with mr Howard

[thesapphictimelady]

Ad Astra Per Aspera Chapter 5

Word count: 1.8K

TW: Implied domestic and verbal abuse

A/N: This is not proofread at all and I am slightly drunk so please excuse any typos and formatting errors! I hope you all love it and please comment! Tell me what you like and dislike! I have no idea what’s gonna happen next so I’m also open to ideas! The next thing I write will not be a part of this series but I hope you all will love it just as much!

“Is that-”

“Jenny.” Cassie whispered, “Yeah,”

“How did she-”

“I don’t know,” Cassie said, “I didn’t tell her where I moved to. I don’t know how she found me.”

Melissa gently embraced the shaking girl, “It’s okay. Listen, I’m gonna go to your apartment and grab you some clothes. And then…and then you can stay at my place until we sort this out.”

“Ms. Schemmenti I couldn’t impose-”

“You aren’t. It’s gonna be okay, Cassiopeia. We’ll sort this out.”

“I-I should call the cops-”

“No,” Melissa cut in, “Nothing good ever came from getting them involved. I’ll take care of it. I’m gonna have Barb take you to my house while I get your stuff,”

“No!” Cassie said, “I-I want to come with you.”

“Hon, are you sure? We don’t know if she’s still there or not.”

“Please?”

Melissa sighed, wiping a stray tear from the young woman’s cheek, “Okay. Okay, you can come. Let me go make our excuses with Ava.”

“Won’t we get in trouble for leaving early?”

“It’s a teacher workday. Things are more relaxed. Besides, Ava doesn’t care if we’re here or not. Get your stuff together and make a list of what you want to grab so we can be in and out quickly.”

Cassie nodded and the older woman left the room, her heeled boots clicking on the floor. She looked down at her phone and shuddered, quickly closing the photo and powering her phone off. Cassie stood and grabbed a piece of construction paper and a colored pencil from one of the shelves to start making a list of things to grab.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Barbara said, leaning on the doorframe, “Is everything okay? Melissa looked a bit ruffled when she passed my classroom.”

“Yeah, everything’s fine!” Cassie said quickly, “She just went to talk to Ava! She’ll be back.”

Barbara stepped into the room and lowered her voice, “Are you sure you’re okay? Your hands are shaking.”

“I-” Cassie paused and bit her lip, “It’s…it’s complicated. But Ms. Schemmenti is very kind and she’s helping me out.”

“Well, I’m glad Melissa is there for you. She seems to have developed a soft spot for you! If you ever need anything else, Gerald and I are happy to help.”

“I couldn’t possibly ask-”

“You aren’t asking, I’m offering. Really, Cassiopeia, you deserve love and kindness,” Barbara stepped forward and wrapped the younger woman into a hug.

Cassie froze and then the floodgates opened and she was sobbing into Barb’s shoulder.

“I’m just so scared, Mrs. Howard!” she sobbed.

“Oh, sweetheart, it’ll be okay! Melissa and I are going to take care of you!”

“Hey kid, you got your list…” Melissa trailed off as she entered the room and saw Cassiopeia wrapped in Barb’s arms, “What happened?”

“I hugged her and she just broke down. She says she’s scared.”

Melissa crossed the room quickly, picking up Cassie’s phone to make sure there wasn’t anything from Jenny. Once she was satisfied, she started gathering their things into her arms.

“Cassiopeia and I are leaving early. Something came up.”

“Melissa, is there something you want to tell me?” Barbara said, eyeing her over the top of Cassie’s head.

“I think it’s better you didn’t know,” Melissa said, gently coaxing Cassie out of Barbara’s embrace, “I don’t think you’d approve.”

“Melissa Schemmenti…” Barb started.

“Drop it Barb. Listen, I’ll call you tonight, okay? You can be mad at me all ya want but just trust me.”

Cassie sniffled and wiped her eyes, “Bye, Mrs. Howard.”

Barbara’s expression softened and she smiled sadly at her, “Bye, sweetheart. I’ll see you on Monday. And my offer still stands, okay? I’m a phone call away.”

Cassiopeia nodded and let Melissa guide her out of the classroom, down the hall, and out of the building.

“Do any of these cars belong to Jenny?” Melissa asked, pulling into a parking spot.

Cassie looked around and shook her head, “I don’t recognize any of them.”

“You got your list?”

Cassie held it up and Melissa grabbed it out of her hand and unbuckled, reaching behind her seat and pulling out a baseball bat.

“Stay here, I’ll go get everything.”

“Okay first, no, I’m coming with you. And second, WHY do you have a baseball bat in your car? And…please tell me that’s rust.”

“Yeah…rust. Let’s go with that,” Melissa said, making a mental note to wash her baseball bats later, “Are you sure you want to go inside?”

“Ms. Schemmenti, I haven’t unpacked anything. Even I don’t know where half of this stuff is. It’ll be easier if I come with.”

“Fine. Okay, but give me the keys. I’m going in first.”

Cassie dug her keys out of her bag and handed them over. Together, they walked up to the front door, which stood slightly ajar.

“Guess I don’t need these,” Melissa tossed the keys to Cassie, readied her bat and pushed the door the rest of the way open with her boot.

The apartment was quiet and dark. Melissa flicked the lights on and grimaced. All the glass in the apartment had been smashed and littered around and the words “Worthless Bitch” were carved into the wall and doused in red paint. Cassie pushed in front of her and grabbed a duffel bag, dumping the contents on the floor and walking around the room, careful to avoid the glass.

Melissa lowered her bat cautiously once she was sure no one was inside and went to the kitchen to grab the groceries she had left there. Her pizza dough sat untouched but she tossed it in the trash can just to be safe.

“She wouldn’t have poisoned that,” Cassie said softly, shoving a blanket into her duffel, “It’s not her style.”

“Not mine either,” Melissa muttered, going to help Cassie, “You don’t need a blanket kid. What, you think I’m gonna make ya sleep on the floor?”

Cassie blushed, “I-I didn’t know where I’d be sleeping,”

“I have a guest room. You just need clothes and toiletries. I’ve got everything else.”

Cassie paused and looked up at the redhead, “How long…”

“As long as you need to,” Melissa said, grabbing some random clothing items from a box, “I don’t care if it’s a day or a month. You’re not living here until Jenny is taken care of.”

“Taken care of? What is this, The Sopranos?” Cassie joked.

“Until she leaves town,” Melissa said, “Or until we find you a new apartment.”

“I can’t afford anything else…”

“Then I’ll help you. I’m gonna keep ya safe, kid. I’ll always catch you, remember?”

Cassie smiled softly and zipped her duffel bag, “Thank you, Ms. Schemmenti.”

“Cassiopeia, call me Melissa,”

“Thank you, Melissa.”

“You’re welcome. Now get back in the car. I’ll lock up.”

“Hey,” Melissa said, parking the car in her driveway, “Are you doing okay? I mean, your apartment…”

“Think I’ll get my security deposit back?” Cassie joked.

“Kid…”

“I’m okay, Melissa. It’s not the first time she’s done something like that. It’s better to just let her throw her tantrum. I’m less likely to get hurt that way.”

“Cassiopeia, this…you know this isn’t okay, right?”

Cassie shrugged, fiddling with the strap of her duffel bag, “It’s the way it’s always been,”

“That doesn’t make it okay though!”

“Can we please go inside? I-It’s been a long day.”

Melissa sighed and lead the younger woman up to the house.

“Melissa, this is…wow, your house is gorgeous!”

“It’s nothing really,” Melissa said, dropping her keys into a bowl and locking the door.

Cassie laughed, “I haven’t seen a plastic covered couch in years!”

“Yeah well, sometimes people spill and it’s easier to clean!” Melissa said defensively, taking the duffel bag out of Cassie’s hands, “Let me show you the guest room. It’s…it’s a little messy right now. I’ll change the sheets before you go to bed.”

The two women climbed the stairs, Cassie smiling at the family photos lining the walls. Melissa pushed open a door and set down the duffel bag.

“I’ll be right back,” she said, walking further down the hall to open a closet and retrieve fresh sheets.

Cassie set to work stripping the bed and then helped the older woman remake it, tucking the sheets in tightly.

“My room is right down the hall,” Melissa said, pulling her hair into a ponytail, “If you need anything tonight, and i mean anything, just come wake me up.”

“I’m not going to…”

“Kid, I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t mean it. Anything.” Cassie nodded, unzipping her duffel bag to retrieve something to sleep in. It was still light out, but the two women had hardly slept the night before.

“Bathroom is right next door,” Melissa said before closing the door so Cassie could change.

Once she had changed into a tank top and shorts, she took her bag of toiletries to the bathroom and set to work removing all of the makeup she had put on that morning. All the concealer on her neck was wiped clean and she winced slightly when she touched the bruises there.

Melissa knocked on the door softly, “Hon, I just wanted to let you know I’m heading to bed. I didn’t actually sleep at all last night. The doors are all locked and if you need ANYTHING, you come and wake me up.”

Cassiopeia opened the door and Melissa winced at the sight of the bruises on her neck.

“Thank you, Melissa. It means a lot that you’re letting me stay here.”

“Of course. If you get cold, there’s more blankets in the closet at the end of the hall. G’night.”

Melissa headed into her room, closing the door behind her and Cassie headed into the guest room, flipping off the lights and climbing into the bed.

An hour later, sleep was still not coming. She didn’t want to admit it, but after finding out that Jenny had found her, she was terrified. She tossed and turned, she practiced all of her breathing exercises, but the panic attack that had been brewing all evening was closing in on her.

Biting back a sob, she threw back the blankets and curled up on the cold wood floor, trying to ground herself. She knew she was safe, she knew Jenny didn’t know where she was now, yet her brain was still in overdrive.

Another hour of silent sobs passed and she finally decided enough was enough. She crept out of her room and down the hall to Melissa’s room. Slowly, she pushed the door open and tiptoed into the room.

The redhead was snoring softly and Cassie didn’t want to wake her. Instead she climbed into bed with her and laid her head on the pillows. They smelled like vanilla and the faint menthol scent that had lingered in Melissa’s car and…

Cassie frowned, feeling under the pillow and then snorted out a laugh.

“Do you really keep a baseball bat under your pillow?”

Melissa rolled over and hummed sleepily, “What you mean you don’t?”

#abbott elementary #abbott elementary fanfiction #melissa schemmenti fanfic #melissa schemmenti #melissa schemmenti x oc #melissa schemmenti x reader

[dc418writes]

•Baby’s First Hanukkah•

✨Pairing✨: Ari Levinsonxblack!reader

Summary🪄: A surprise visit leads to an emotional first day of Hanukkah (Operation:Rekindle addition)

⚠️: Ari (😏….y’all know lol), bit of angst in this one, fluff, mention of pregnancy

A/N🎙️: ✨Happy belated Hanukkah and Merry belated Christmas to those who celebrated! And Happy Holidays to everyone who doesn’t celebrate✨! I intended this to be out wayy earlier but here we are lol also I hope the explanation I have for Hanukkah is correct, but if there’s something I need to change please let me know☺️

*Disclaimer!: although collage was made by me, I DO NOT CLAIM OWNERSHIP of pictures used as they were all found on Pinterest*

“Not celebrating Christmas?,” your mother asks with arms crossed and a raised perfectly arched brow. Clearly not pleased with the words that just slipped past your lips.

“I didn’t say that. I just said we’re not gonna make it to the party this year. We wanna stay in and be with ourselves instead you know? We’ll still come Christmas Day.”

“Which is perfectly fine,” your father interjects before your mother could say anything more. “Right Tori?”

You knew this would happen. It’s exactly why you planned to call her the night before with your fool proof excuse of having caught a stomach bug and needing to stay in. No one would get hurt and you could freely spend that evening with Ari. Plus you wouldn’t have to dance around the actual reason you were skipping your family’s annual Christmas soirée.

However, your mother’s perfect timing and knack for pop up visits sent that down the river in a fiery pile of ashes.

“Well, could’ve fooled me with all the Hanukkah decorations and lack of Christmas tree,” she retorts waving her hand back and forth emphasizing the decorations you already set.

“I still have to put it up,” you answer focused on making sure the menorah was properly centered on the island. Or maybe it’d look better on the other table? “And, as I’ve told you before, Ari is Jewish. So these decorations are for him, and to make it feel like his place just as much as it is mine.”

“Mm..and where is Mr. Ari so he can help?”

“He’s still sleeping-,”

“And leaving you with all the work.” A humorless “tuh” huffs from Tori’s lungs as she turns towards your father. “Some boyfriend huh Howard?”

“He was up late studying,” you state finally facing your parents standing in your living room. Your facial muscles working overtime trying to keep your annoyance and anger hidden.

Unknown to you, Ari was wide awake on the other side of the wall in your bedroom hearing every word since your parents stepped over the threshold. Heartbeat already elevated on where this conversation would go.

“Look, I know you’re in love with him-,”

“Tori,” your father tries to warn, but you both knew nothing was stopping her.

“But that doesn’t mean you have to do everything together. Couples can have separate lives sweet girl.”

“I know, and we do-,”

“So it’s settled then! You’ll rightly be with us, you’re family, for Christmas as usual and he’ll be with his,” she smiles. “Which then leaves New Years for you two spending time together.”

Ari didn’t have to be out there to know you were growing frustrated. He could already see your jaw tick and nostrils slightly flare. Feel the heat radiate from your skin to the surrounding air.

“Ari’s my family too.”

“Yea you’re close, but-,”

“No, because he’s my husband,” you reveal in a flurry of words; exasperated with the idea of this conversation continuing.

“That’s sweet of you to claim him for your future-,”

“I’m not talking about the future mom, I mean now! We..we got married in July. At the courthouse.”

Unsurprisingly, there’s a long silence as your parents stand blinking at you. Their expressions unreadable and solely trained on you even when Ari quietly strides by your side in his college tee and sweats.

Your mother’s eyes eventually drift to your hand where your ring prettily sat on your finger. It was simple with just a single diamond that some would consider small, but it was all you needed. And you loved that ring because of the man that gave it to you.

“So that’s not a promise ring like you said,” she calmly states. Everyone around could feel her rising anger though.

“Well technically it is. Just for a..legally binding promise,” you nervously smile. It quickly falls at the sight of their disappointment. “This wasn’t how I wanted to tell you.”

“After five months it seems like you weren’t planning to tell us at all Y/N!”

Ari desperately wanted to come to your rescue and try to calm everyone, but what could he really say to help? He’s tried before when he felt your mother was being too tough on you while in school scolding you on what you should be doing and when. How you needed to be putting yourself out there in as many clubs and organizations as you could to network and possibly get an internship. Maybe even a job right out of college.

“She’s doing really well and always trying her best Mrs. Y/L/N,” he states standing across your mother on the opposite side of the kitchen island. However, she’s more concerned with perfecting the cake batter in front of her than to look him in the eyes. “I-I get you want the best for her-,”

“Exactly, I want the best for my daughter as any parent does their child,” she calmly replies - scarily calm in fact - lifting her head to finally meet his nervous blues. “Something I know you wouldn’t fully understand seeing as though you have no children. Correct?”

“Right..”

“So until that day comes- actually no, even if that day comes, I suggest you refrain from trying to suggest how I parent my daughter. Understood Ari?”

Nervously shifting from one foot to the other, he agrees with a quiet, “Understood,” and a slight tip of his head before his presence is ignored once again by your now sweetly humming mother.

Since then, he’s kept his interactions with her short - and she’s pretty much done the same on her end.

“I’ll be in the car,” she says after the most tense moment of silence any of them had ever experienced.

“Mom I’m sorry.” Your apology falls on deaf ears as she continues forward striding through the door and letting it slam with a loud thud that rattled the wall. “She hates me.”

“No she doesn’t,” your father sighs stepping close enough to give your shoulder a sympathetic squeeze. “Neither of us could ever hate you. We’re just hurt.”

A lone tear falls as he places a kiss to your temple and you feel your heart ache. You knew the consequences of your actions all those months ago as you stood hand in hand with Ari in front of the judge. Nothing could have prepared you for actually having to endure those consequences though.

“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of mom sweet pea. We’ll see you guys on Christmas,” he painfully smiles before making his way out the door as well.

But not without Ari close on his heels catching him halfway down the wooden steps outside your door.

“Mr. Y/L/N it’s my fault. I’m the one who brought up the idea of getting married,” Ari admits with guilt etched into his strong features. “Be more upset with me than you are with her.”

Your father can’t help the small smile that forms on his lips at your husband’s attempt to make things right. Since their first meeting, he could see how he’d gladly do whatever was needed to make you happy. How protective he was and completely enamored by everything that was you. It warmed his heart that you found someone who loved you possibly just as much as he did.

He realized then his prayer for you to be taken care of by a good man had been answered.

“Ari this is no one’s fault, alright? You both are grown, so if you want to get married you have every right. As far as us though, that’s our little girl who we dreamed of walking down the aisle and giving away. Gifting her with a big wedding where we could all celebrate that next stage of life with her and her husband. To not even be invited or told beforehand what was gonna happen it’s..,” he sighs briefly letting his eyes wander trying to find the right words, “it’s as if someone slapped us right across the face before the punch to the gut.”

Ari’s face falls in shame putting himself in the older man’s shoes. Of course he didn’t regret marrying you, but looking back he should’ve pushed more for you to be open with your parents. To not be afraid of their reaction and firm in that this was your decision.

Instead, he went along with your promise of telling them later so clouded by the joy and excitement of being wed to the love of his life.

“It might sound dramatic, but if you decide to have children you’ll understand.”

“No, I-I get it..and I’m sorry.”

Your father nods appreciatively, “Just give us some time son. We’ll be okay.”

Son. That was a good sign right?

“Happy Hanukkah Ari. And take care of my baby girl.”

“Of course sir,” he smiles. “Thank you.”

With a final wave goodbye, he watches your father descend the steps joining your mother in the running car; definitely still upset from the scowl twisting her face as she gazed out the passenger window.

He can hear your sniffles as he re-enters the linen scented space quickening his feet until he can sit next to you on the couch rubbing circles in your back and kissing your forehead.

“That’s definitely not what I wanted you to wake up to,” you half heartedly chuckle wiping your watery eyes.

“Hey don’t worry about that. I’m just sorry I even put you in the situation in the first place when I brought up getting married at the courthouse.”

Your fingers find his jaw softly scratching the bit of scruff lining it as you carefully shift to sit in his lap. “It was still my decision though. And yes I should’ve told them sooner..but I wouldn’t change how and when we got married,” you smile leaving two kisses, sweet as honey, on his lips. A beat of comfortable silence falls over the two of you while he holds you close to his chest gently rocking back and forth. Both of you taking in the sounds of birds and children outside for a few minutes as he occasionally pecks your temple and your heartbeats mold into a similar rhythm.

“Now,” you begin, sitting up to clear your face of any remaining streaks and tears, “I distinctly remember you promising to teach me all about Hanukkah. And cook me every dish until my stomach feels like it’s gonna pop.”

“Sweetheart, it’s okay you don’t-,”

“A promise is a promise Ari!,” you dramatically state with a poke to his well built chest making his lips curl in a light chuckle. “Plus I want to. Like I said you’re my family too, and I wanna learn and explore everything about you.”

When he thought he couldn’t love you any more than he already did, there you were adorably making him fall even harder.

“Okay…so there was once a king named Antiochus, who ruled over Syria and lived outside of Israel. Now this king was horrible and so absorbed with himself, he ordered everyone in the countries he conquered to worship the Gods he did and abandon their usual practices. Eventually, he made his way to Israel where he enforced that order on the Jews and even went as far as commanding his soldiers to destroy our temples if the people weren’t willing to convert them. Unfortunately, this included the most beautiful of them that was in Jerusalem.”

Your attention stayed glued on the man with his arms around you, looking up with an adoring smile to see his eyes sparkle and how his lips moved filling your living room with a deep voice full of passion and animation. You didn’t have to ask to know he was the favorite among his little cousins for storytelling.

“Some followed the king’s orders to avoid trouble, but there were others, like Judah Maccabee, who stood up to him. He and his brothers formed an army to go against Antiochus and the Syrian army to take back their home and free his people from the king’s rule. They were outnumbered, I’m talking like middle schoolers up against a professional team, but they won! They reclaimed Jerusalem and everyone was thrilled, however when they entered the temple in Jerusalem, everything was ruined. The floor was cracked, gold pitchers tarnished, and most importantly, there was no oil to light the menorah. They found a little while cleaning up, but knew it’d only last through the night. Instead though, they were surprised to watch it stay lit for eight days and nights, which they took as a sign that God was with them. So in remembrance of that miracle and our own reminder of how God is always with us, we light a candle on the menorah each night for eight total nights. Plus we spend time with family, eat food, and play games as part of our complete Hanukkah celebration,” Ari smiles brushing a loose curl behind your ear. “Didn’t bore you too much did I?”

“Of course not. I loved it honey.” Wrapping your arms around his neck, you peck his lips before nuzzling your face against his warm skin taking in his wood and sage cologne. “I can’t wait until you get to tell it to our kids.”

“Me either, but we still got a good while for that beautiful.”

“Or..it might come sooner than you think..”

“Maybe,” he shrugs.

“Like this summer,” you add being met with silence as you felt his head tilt. Something he tended to do when in thought or confused.

Gently lifting you from his chest, the sight of you nervously biting your lip is all the answer he needs as his expression morphs from confused to disbelief and finally shock. “B-But wait..how- when-?”

“Halloween and our um after party when we left your cousin’s. I’m nearly two months so I just did the math in my head and figured.” Thinking back, he remembers how both of you seemed to be unable to keep your hands off the other as soon as you walked through your apartment door. Him being in some type of hypnotic, aroused trance after watching you play with his toddler cousins and you after just seeing him with his family period. How you couldn’t wait to give him one of his own.

“I-I know it’s not part of our plan right now, especially with you in grad school and me figuring out my stuff-,”

“But it’s okay. We got this.” You hadn’t realized you were crying until you feel his thumb brush along your cheeks. Having kept your stress hidden for all this time, and what happened with your parents earlier, it was probably time to get your emotions out whether you wanted to or not.

“I just hope I live long enough to meet little bug,” he chuckles pressing his nose to your cheek before resting his forehead on yours. “You know your parents are definitely gonna kill me when they find out.”

“They won’t, but if they try I’ll just stand in front of you. They wouldn’t hurt the pregnant lady carrying their grandchild.”

“We might need to be handcuffed together for the rest of your pregnancy then.”

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#ari levinson #ari levinson x black!reader #ari levinson x reader #ari levinson au #red sea diving resort #chris evans #chris evans x black reader #chris evans x reader #chris evans x woc!reader #ari levinson x woc

[styleslistic]

How It Turned Out - Harry Styles Fic Part 1

Y/N is a musician who started her career around the same time Harry went solo. They’ve never met, but they share a lot of the same fans and are frequently compared to one another. 

In part 1 Y/N is reluctantly being interviewed on the Howard Stern show, and doesn’t hesitate to put him in his place. 

Masterlist

Howard: So, Y/N the new record is great, are you happy with how it turned out?

Y/N: Haha well, you would hope I was happy with it, otherwise it would’ve been a bit silly to release it. I think it’s my favourite album so far, just because of the balance between different moods. Its a bit sweet, a bit sad, a bit sexy, a bit silly. And that feels true to me as a person you know. 

Howard: It’s definitely sexy, I’ll give you that much! I mean wow. The most recent single especially. What inspired you to write about sex between women like that?

Y/N: Most of my music is inspired by my life in some way. I’ve written songs about having sex with men, too. It’s just that this one stands out a little more because it’s something people haven’t seen as much. 

Howard: Well, I for one say bring on more songs like it. I mean, I’ll let you in on a secret here Y/N, hearing about women having sex like that is an absolute wet dream for guys like me. 

Y/N: *gives him an icy stare* I didn’t right the song for guys like you, I’m afraid. I wrote it for girls like me. There���s so little written about queer sex, and especially queer sex that is both sexy and funny. So that’s what inspired the song I suppose.

Howard: Huh, well I don’t what you’re smoking when you’re having sex that’s that funny, but sign me up!

Y/N: *stifles a snort of laughter* Ah, well I’m sorry, not every one is cut out to be able to entertain their partners. But don’t worry there’s still time to learn. *looks slyly at the camera* I think it’s easy to have fun during sex when you know what you’re doing.

Howard: *suddenly defensive* Right, we better move onto the next question I think... 

Y/N: Go ahead.

Howard: There’s been quite a lot of chat about you being the Female Harry Styles. What do you make of that?

Y/N: *struggles not to roll her eyes, she’s been asked about this a lot* It’s always flattering to be compared to another artist, especially one as talented as Harry. And I see where people a coming from a little, we definitely have a few of the same influences, and we share the same penchant for flamboyant outfits and rainbow flags. It’s always a little frustrating, though, to be reduced to the “female version” of someone else. I mean, he may have had a head start from being in the band, but our solo careers started at pretty similar times. We’ve both built our own careers, and mine isn’t really anything to do with his. 

Howard: Ah so you’d prefer it if he was being called the male version of you then? Or maybe just another female version of you if he keeps dressing like that, haha!

Y/N: I don’t think it’s really appropriate for you to be making judgements about another person’s gender or their clothing. But you’ve illustrated pretty well there how reductive it is to put people into little boxes like that.

Howard: Oof, you’re a feisty one aren’t you.

Y/N: I get that a lot.

Howard: I believe that, I tell you.

Y/N: I find that it’s a word men use when faced with a woman they don’t know what to do with.

Howard: *stunned silence*

Y/N: Shall we move on to the next question?

Howard: Yes, um. Uh, a lot of your fans have been practically begging you to collaborate with Mr Styles, is that something that’s in the pipeline?

Y/N: I wouldn’t say so, given that we’ve not met each other, but never say never.

Howard: So what does make you want to collaborate with other artists. You’ve worked with quite a few different people over the years, including on the new record.

Y/N: *relieved that the interview is finally headed somewhere less uncomfortable* It’s great fun working with other artists, so that’s one of the main things. I’m not gonna waste time writing a song with someone if it’s gonna feel like pulling teeth.

Howard: Smart.

Y/N: Haha, yeah. But I also like working with people when it feels like we’ve got something we want to say together, you know. Maybe shared experience, a shared passion or an issue we want to bring attention to. That’s when I find collaborating most rewarding. 

Howard: Speaking of which, Now seems like a good time for you to play us a song..! 

Part 2 in progress! It’ll focus on what happens when the interview goes live.

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles fic #harry styles x reader #musician!y/n #how it turned out

[irondad-defensesquad]

Safe place

Also posted on AO3!

A/N: this was based on one of @fotibrit's great Irondad prompts! Here's the original. I'm very nervous because I didn't write it exactly how it was supposed to be, so I'm sorry if it's too short dhsgfjdg

TRIGGER WARNINGS - panic attack, past child abuse, and trauma

--

Everyone has a safe place. For Tony, it’s the machines, the insides of iron and the engines, oil his favorite smell. It might sound gross and strange to other people, but that’s been the reality since his younger years. An even safer place for him is when he’s under a car, where he can hide from the world.

Or most specifically, from his father.

Teenage Tony Stark once ran away from home, resulting in Howard cutting him off financially to force him to come back. Those were dire times, ones nobody is aware of, not even Rhodey, his best friend. To the media then, unheard of. No one has ever known the truth about Howard Stark, though honestly, Tony doubts it would even taint his reputation.

Either way, Tony has a safe place in his machines, and it’s not one he really shares with anyone. People admire it from a distance, not quite understanding his obsession with it.

But everything changes when a certain spider-kid starts seeing him in his workshop.

Besides updating and fixing Peter’s suit, they also spend some of it going through Tony’s cars. While Tony is under the car, Peter hands him the necessary tools. It's the opposite of Tony’s teenage years. Howard would never let his son anywhere near him or his own workshop, no matter how hard Tony tried to prove to him he was worth it.

The workshop is not only Tony’s safe place. It’s also Peter’s. He sees the spark in the kid’s eyes when they’re building and rebuilding something.

When Tony realizes it, he’s willing to do something he never imagined.

“How about you try?” He suggests, leaving the car.

Peter raises an eyebrow. “Try what?”

The man points at the car, ready to be repaired again.

“... Oh. Uh…”

Peter nervously kneels down to check under the car.

“What do you say?” Tony smiles.

“I…” the kid returns to his feet. “I dunno, Mr. Stark. What if I- I break something?”

Tony scoffs. “Come on, don’t be shy.”

“No, really, I don’t think this is a good idea.”

“Hey, it’s okay. You’re not going to mess it up.” He pats Peter’s shoulder. “I trust you.”

Peter seems to be awestruck by said words.

“But hey, if you’re not up to it, I’m not gonna force you,” Tony reassures him.

So, he returns down there while Peter sits next to him, waiting for instructions. The thing is… Peter has grown rather quiet. He usually goes on about his day while Tony works – which is not at all distracting, Tony doesn’t mind it. He just wonders why the kid isn’t talking much.

When he checks up on Peter, he finds him very… contemplative, like he’s trying to figure out what to do next.

“Pete? You good?” Tony asks.

“Oh, um…”

The older man gazes at him, wondering what’s up.

“Actually…” Peter clears his throat. “Can I try it now?”

Tony grins. “Sure, buddy.”

Although he wasn’t necessarily disappointed when Peter first rejected it, it does bring him some joy to be sharing his safe place with someone he likes spending time with.

“You know what to do, yeah?” Tony asks as the kid goes under the car this time.

“Y… Yeah.”

“Here,” Tony hands him the screwdriver.

Except…

Peter doesn’t take it.

“Peter?”

“Oh- sorry, sorry.”

“Are you okay?”

“Mmm, yeah, totally.”

However, as Peter takes the tool, Tony notices his hand is… trembling. And he doesn’t even use the screwdriver – he just plays with it nervously, then holding onto it tightly. Tony checks down there, realizing that Peter seems to think the car is going to crush him at any moment as he’s as stiff and hardened as a rock.

“Peter, you don’t have to–” Tony tries, only to be interrupted.

“I’m fine, Mr. Stark, I just–”

The kid gulps.

“I just- I can’t–” Peter heaves. “I can’t breathe–”

Shit.

Tony pulls him back, only for the teen to instantly stand and run away.

“Peter, wait!” The former tries to reach out to him.

Peter stops and snaps, “I can’t BREATHE in there!”

“You don’t have to go back there, I promise. It’s okay.”

The boy’s brown eyes are glowing. But it’s not that spark that Tony sees when they’re having fun.

“You’re safe, Pete,” Tony tells him. “You’re safe.”

Peter sobs. “I-I’m sorry.”

“Hey, shhh…”

“I’m sorry, you trusted me, I didn’t want to let you down–”

“You didn’t, it’s okay.”

Peter starts crying more properly, like Tony’s reassurances are making him let out whatever is repressed inside him. He hugs himself, hiding from Tony, tears falling on the floor.

“Oh, Peter,” the latter wants to cry, too. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to push you.”

“N-No, you don’t get it, I- I was–”

Tony takes one tentative step forward, respecting the boy’s space.

“I was stuck,” Peter says. “I was stuck and I couldn’t breathe and- and it was so dark and suffocating”– he weeps –“I couldn’t get out, no one could hear me–”

Tony is surprised to hear this. It’s like… he has experienced something as awful as this before. But apparently much, much worse.

“I’m here,” he reminds Peter. “I’m here, I can hear you. You can breathe now. You just gotta follow my lead, okay?”

Finally, Peter looks up, eyes and cheeks red.

Tony is gradually stepping closer.

“With me, in… and out…” He exaggerates deep breaths. It’s something Rhodey usually does to help him, and he hopes it does the same for Peter. “In… and out.”

Peter’s breaths are shaky and wet, but he follows Tony’s instructions perfectly. The calmer they are, the closer Tony is.

“You’re doing great, kid,” the man praises. “Keep it going.”

Peter nods and continues. He does it a couple more times before an exasperated sigh comes out of him. Tony is close enough now, wanting to take Peter’s shaking hands into his. He does it slowly so he doesn’t scare him off.

That leads Peter to bury his face against his shoulder. Tony freezes, but not at the contact. It’s the way the kid shrinks like he’s expecting to get yelled at.

This whole thing, Tony sees a teenager that just wanted his father’s approval. That wanted to do everything to prove to him he was good enough.

But Peter… Peter is so much more than just good enough.

The truth is, he’s…

He’s Tony’s safe place.

And he wants to be Peter’s, too.

It should matter more than the machines and cars and an old mechanic shop no one has ever heard of. They are each other’s home.

Finally, Tony wraps both arms around him, as the boy cries silently. Peter doesn’t have the strength to return the hug for now, he just lets himself be hugged because he’s needed this all along.

Eventually, they leave the workshop. They get something to eat, and they just make themselves comfortable. Peter doesn’t need to tell Tony everything today. He knows something is up, but he’s not going to force the boy to do anything else.

All he does… is to be by Peter’s side.

He makes sure he’s safe.

Tony won’t let his kid struggle on his own ever again.

He’ll be here.

Forever and always.

#irondad #tony stark #peter parker #fanfiction #fics #my fics #panic attack tw #trauma tw #abuse tw #i'm so nervous aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

[swan-of-sunrise]

Over The Moon (Tales From The SSR)

Summary: It’s Valentine’s Day in the West Coast SSR and love is in the air for Daniel and Peggy, who spend the day watching their friends’ fledgling romance flourish and looking back on the beginnings of their own relationship.

Pairing: Peggy Carter X Daniel Sousa, Jack Thompson X Reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Warning/Disclaimers: None

A/N: Hi guys! I’m sorry it’s taken so long for this little one-shot to come out (I had a different one planned but after rewriting it twice, I scrapped it and decided to work on this one) but today, we’re gonna revisit Daniel and Peggy’s relationship from our favorite chief’s POV! Thank you for reading, I hope you all enjoy!

Over The Moon February 1948 West Coast Strategic Scientific Reserve, Los Angeles (Previous One-Shot)

“Aw, Peg, you shouldn’t have…”

Peggy simply shrugged her shoulders and smiled as Daniel reverently admired the signed baseball he’d just unwrapped. “It was no trouble at all, Daniel! Mr. Jarvis and I were at one of Howard’s silly parties and we just so happened to run into Mr. Robinson there, along with six of his fellow teammates from the Brooklyn Dodgers. I knew how much you liked the team, so I took advantage of the golden opportunity before me in the name of romance and voilà.”

Daniel grinned and shook his head in loving exasperation, knowing perfectly well that his amazing girlfriend had conned Howard Stark into pulling some strings and getting half the Brooklyn Dodgers to sign a baseball just for him. But there’s not a chance in hell that she’d ever admit to asking Stark for help, he thought with an inward chuckle as he crumpled the heart-patterned wrapping paper into a ball and tossed it into the waste basket across the office, and there’s not a chance in hell that I’ll ever question a ball signed by one of the best players in Major League Baseball. “It’s a very thoughtful gift, honey, definitely the best Valentine’s Day gift I’ve ever received. Thank you.” Daniel leaned in and captured her lips in a sweet kiss, lightly chuckling in embarrassment once they finally separated. “Now I sorta feel like a chump for just getting you that perfume…”

“You shouldn’t, darling; just because I enjoy cleaning and assembling weapons in my spare time doesn’t mean I don’t like smelling good while doing so.” Peggy smiled triumphantly as he laughed. “You took the time to browse my vanity, locate my perfume bottles and use them to determine which of the new perfumes at Bullock’s that I’d be the fondest of. I promise, it was just as thoughtful of a gift as a baseball signed by some of your all-time favorite players.”

A triumphant shout interrupted their next near-kiss, and they both looked out the office windows into the bullpen to see an elated Jack punch the air and scribble something down on a notepad. Sitting at the desk across from him, (Y/N) smiled to herself as she adjusted the vase full of baby-pink roses placed beside her morning cup of tea and continued typing out a case report on her typewriter. Daniel, sensing that there was something unusual going on between his top two agents, furrowed his brow in confusion and turned back to face his girlfriend. “What’s all that about?”

“Oh, (Y/N) thought it would be sweet to write a Valentine’s Day card entirely in code and give it to Jack along with his gift.” The office door was closed but Peggy lowered her voice all the same. “Don’t tell either of them that I said anything, but apparently our dear Jack mentioned to (Y/N) that he really wanted a photograph of her so that he could have something beautiful to brighten up his desk. So, she went down to the portrait studio last week and had one taken to give to him today.”

Sure enough, when Daniel looked back out at the bullpen, he spotted the framed black-and-white photograph of the agency’s top codebreaker and smiled at how carefully the ex-chief propped it against his desk lamp so that he could glance up at it while he decoded. “You don’t say? Are we one-hundred-percent certain she’s dating our Jack Thompson and not some sort of sappy doppelgänger who’s seen one too many Cary Grant flicks?”

Peggy chuckled as she leaned back against his desk. “It is a little hard to believe that the Jack Thompson currently hard at work decoding a declaration of love is the same one I once threatened to shoot. What’s even harder to believe, though, is that we never realized how obviously over the moon they were for one another; Thompson was forced to spell it out for us over the phone when he decided to step down as Chief and relocate to Los Angeles, remember?”

“When you think about it, it’s not really that surprising.” Daniel smirked a little at his girlfriend’s incredulous frown. “C’mon, Peg, how long did it take for us to get our heads out of our asses and finally admit that we were over the moon for each other?”

A light pink blush appeared in Peggy’s cheeks and he could practically see her recalling all those months of quiet pining and longing stares as she fought the smile that was threatening to form on her cherry-red lips. “Perhaps you have a point there, Daniel. Out of curiosity, when was it that you started to have feelings for me?”

“The exact moment? I’m not really sure, but I do know when I realized that I saw you as more than my coworker.” Daniel hung his crutch on its hook and sat down in his desk’s chair. “It wasn’t very long after I joined the SSR and I was having a real bad day that day; I slipped on the steps outside and that caused me to be late, Dooley handed one of my cases over to Thompson, and Krzeminski wouldn’t stop cracking jokes about my leg. But then you came around with the lunch orders and there was a chocolate-chip cookie I definitely didn’t order hidden inside my take-out box; that cookie turned a bad day into an okay one…well, that and when Krzeminski’s desk drawers mysteriously jammed and he fell on his ass trying to pry them open.” They laughed and Daniel smiled up at Peggy as he continued. “That’s when I knew that there was someone in my corner at the SSR, someone who didn’t pity me but who understood better than most anyone what it felt like to be up against the entire world.”

With a gentle smile on her face, Peggy slid down from the desk and took a seat on his lap, one of her arms resting across his shoulders while the other fiddled with the collar of his aloha shirt. “I’d say that I was only doing what anyone else would, but we both know what manner of agents we were working alongside back in New York.”

“You’ve got that right. So, when did you know that you had a thing for me?”

His girlfriend’s smile morphed into something coyer. “All right, I’ll tell you…over dinner tonight.” Daniel groaned in disappointment while she merely chuckled at his dramatics. “Seriously, we really should try and get some sort of work done today, darling; we have half a dozen cases to sign off on, three witnesses to interview for the Olsen case and-oh, for heaven’s sake!”

Daniel followed Peggy’s incredulous eye-line to see Jack and (Y/N) standing by the former’s tidy desk; the codebreaker was whispering something into the agent’s ear and judging by the lopsided grin beginning to form on his lips, it had absolutely nothing to do with work. While a pink-faced Daniel and a smirking Peggy watched, (Y/N) took Jack’s hand in hers and cast a furtive glance around the bullpen before pulling him out into the hall. “…What’re the odds that they’re headed into the supply closet for more typewriter ribbon?”

“About as good as Rose finally joining Samberly for a night on the town,” Peggy quipped, her brown eyes alight with playfulness as she expectantly looked down at him. “So, shall we set a good example for the others and get back to work?”

After pretending to ponder his girlfriend’s question, Daniel suddenly used his good leg to push his rolling desk chair across the office, grinning as Peggy giggled at the unexpected movement and tightened her arm around his shoulders; he grabbed the cord of his window’s Venetian blinds and tugged them closed before moving his hand to cradle the back of Peggy’s neck. “Maybe later. We can’t let Jack and (Y/N) have all the fun, can we, Agent Carter?”

Peggy chuckled and shook her head as her fingers carded through his hair. “We certainly can’t, Chief Sousa.”

Their lips met in a slow and passionate kiss and Daniel sighed at the pleasant sensation of his girlfriend’s crimson nails gently scraping against his scalp, tightening his hold on her and smiling against her red-hued lips as he thanked his lucky stars that he’d finally achieved the honor of being Peggy Carter’s Valentine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

A/N: Daniel’s so cute lol thank you all so much for reading and commenting! I’ve created a Spotify playlist inspired by this series, and I’ll be updating it every time I upload a new one-shot. Enjoy!

Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0iKzLZlEK1rTaSIiW5zRlk?si=97af3c9ce3ff4b65

“Tales From The SSR” Masterlist

“Specs and the Flyboy” Masterlist

Tagging: @nnon-it-up​​ @fluffymadamina​ @remmyswritings​​ @ourstarsailor @coffeeandcrimeshows​ @darkusangelus​​ @josis-teacup​​ @marvel-jackt-loki-buck​ @yeetyeetchickenmeat​​ @sameoldbaby​​ @theserenityspace​ @seeing-but-not-observing​​ @supervoldejaygent​​ @momc95​​ @brooke0297​​ @kinda-c0nfused​​ @outoftheregular​​ @mads-weasley​​ @mostclevermiss​​ @crowleysqueenofhell​​ @groovy-lady​​ @xxruinaxxmcu​​​  

#tales from the ssr #specs and the flyboy #jack thompson x reader #jack thompson #peggy carter x daniel sousa #peggy carter #agent carter #daniel sousa #chief sousa #rose roberts #aloysius samberly #howard stark #edwin jarvis #ana jarvis #edwin jarvis x ana jarvis #strategic scientific reserve #marvel cinematic universe

[cdyssey]

Abbott 2.15 Thoughts:

ABBOTT TIME. I drew this last night because I didn’t have the episode to obsess over.

“I am one minor inconvenience away from putting this whole day in rice.” What a glorious expression, omg.

Ava about Jacob’s carrot cookies: “Mm, no. Just looking at them almost put me over the top.” WKWJWNSNS. Also, Ava’s entirely pink pantsuit, omfg. Hot.

Melissa having her kids in line two seconds into the fire alarm vs. Ava HIGH-TAILING it OUT OF THERE QKQKWNDNSKAK. (It’s funny and so consistent with what we know about her!! She’s a Doomsday prepper! She’s always fearing the worst!)

YOU’RE FUCKING KIDDING ME. I WAS ANGST-POSTING ABOUT BARB’S CANDLE ACCIDENTALLY BURNING HERS AND MEL’S TABLE AND IT HAPPENED!!!!!!!!! LISTEN!

Mel: “Because as someone who wanted to be a firefighter, I hate fires. They sicken me. I want to fight them.” / Barb: “Smoke and fire—the devil’s fresh air.” Get you two girlfriends who have very strong opinions about fires.

The actor who plays Captain Robinson looks so familiar to me, omg. I’ve seen this dude before, but WHERE?

QQKWJWNWJEJEJDDJ, Ava’s prepper video. She’s gonna fight fire with fire.

“Facebook crashing—that’s for the older teachers… and a lice outbreak—for the white teachers.” Lmfao.

“Oh, my God. Someone’s trying to use cashmere and Jesus to blackmail Barbara.” / “You mean frame.” / “Semantics.” QOQOQKQMSNDNSJSJJSS. Name another show on air rn that’s funnier than this. Goddamn.

Mel about a fire truck: “Yeah, that’s—that’s one big daddy.” SOBBING. DON’T SAY IT LIKE THAT.

“That’s where youse all work those cute little puppy dog eyes to get the firefighters to let us play on the truck.” AOQMQWNSN. She is so fucking adorable.

Mel’s uncle being a firefighter and Joe maybe having been a firefighter!

“Wow… would you look at this big hunk of”—the firefighter assumes she’s coming over to flirt—“metal.” AKQWMENDJE.

“See, this is why I love fire trucks. I get older—they stay the same.” WOQOWJDNS. I’m losing it.

HOT COUNSELOR. WE DID IT, FANDOM. WE MANIFESTED HOT COUNSELOR.

“It is late morning, and the container is still completely full. I’ll pass.” QQKWJWJWJSJSJSDS.

“Me? Oh, I’m just fine.” Barbara Howard being in full mask mode. Oh, my God.

“Are you writing I’m fine?” / “Well, that’s a lot of writing for ‘I’m fine.’” / “It’s just two words and one of them is a contraction.” Not only does Barbara have to assert to herself that she’s fine, but she also has to be externally validated that other people are buying into her outward shields as well.

“So if there’s anyone to blame, it would be the wind.” 😭 Sobbing.

“Yes, but it seems like you’re an investigator of feelings. And I want you to know that I am feeling just fine.” Barbara spiraling. Y’all, I can’t do this.

Janine trying to use the trauma counselor like a therapist. 😭

Mel showing off her knowledge about fire trucks. This girl is hyperfixated!!!! She’s just like me, fr!! AKANSNSS, her getting inside the truck and honking the horn.

Gregory needing to put on his sweater + that little smirk he gives to the camera. AJWNDNS. God, I love him. / The counselor going, “We’ll dig into that later.” WKWKEJDNS.

“I’ve longed for protocol. This is the best day of my life.”

Gregory guessing that almost everyone in the book except for Barbara is not well-adjusted because no one expects for her to fall apart. She’s so good at keeping it together. Oh, my fucking GOD. (Also, lmao, at Mr. Johnson being the singlemost well-adjusted man the counselor has ever met.)

“I’m talking about Barbara Howard.” / “Are you sure don’t mean Janine?” NOT GREGORY GESTURING AT KID HEIGHT. ANQJWJKWDJ.

“Nothing shakes up people more than a fire. There’s usually something under the surface.” / “I feel like you’re reading her wrong. Barbara is the most put together and collected person at this school.” Sobbing. And then Barbara comes in AGAIN to reiterate that she’s fine. She has to hear SOMEONE ELSE tell her and confirm that she’s fine. She’s so insecure if she perceives that people aren’t buying her “I’m fine/I’m perfect” shtick. JESUS. I’m so normal about Barbara Howard.

WOQQKSJSJS. Barbara has never listened to Chaka Khan’s “Through the Fire” on her PANDORA. That is such a perfect detail. These writers know their characters so well.

Gregory coming to check in on Barbara. 🥺

“You are not a principal, Gregory. You are but a child.” HELP.

“I’m as good as it gets. Perfect, even.” I am UNWELL about this woman.

“Gregory, I am spiritually tenured. Mandates are nothing more than fervent suggestions. Ava would let me skip this.” QOQKQKWKWIEJDNSNSN. I know all my Barbava friends screamed.

“And don’t you think that if anyone should attend the fire safety meeting, it should be you, considering…?” 😭😭

“My shawl caught fire on a stained-glass Jesus candle. Nobody got hurt. So why don’t we all just put this ordeal behind us and move forward?”

Gregory putting his foot down!!!

“I miss Ava.” THE EMPHASIS IN MRS. BARBARA HOWARD’S VOICE. WKWNSNS. JERI, JERI, ARE YOU OKAY?

Melissa’s kids being bored af akkwjwiwjdnsw.

Gregory confiding in Janine about his worries about Barb, and Janine immediately going through the gamut of concerned questions. 😭 That’s their MOM.

“Doesn’t even make sense. Why would a fire own sunglasses?” Lmfao.

“Less of a question and more of a comment. I could run this meeting in my sleep.” Her energy in this episode GOD.

Melissa’s dreams of being a firefighter crushed by misogyny. 😭

“You can’t spell firefighter without ‘her.’” JACOB KQOQKWWKEJD.

Teddie trying to be Barbara’s supporters behind her, but Gregory getting himself into some deep shit by intuiting that Barbara’s insecurity is “getting older and becoming forgetful.” Melissa, indignant, protective: “What the hell?”

“You have no idea the nonsense that teachers get away with here repeatedly, but the one time I light a candle for peace of mind, without ever having a prior problem, you want to take it away from me. Well, that is unfair and ridiculous!” I AM SOBBJNG.

MEL RUNNING AFTER HER. THOSE ARE MY WORK WIVES.

Barbara in her classroom, arms crossed over her chest, breathing heavily. Hhhgh, and Mel immediately showing up to console her.

WOWOQKSNSJW, MEL TRYING TO CONSOLE HER VIA SHOWING HOW HOT SHE LOOKS NEXT TO A FIRE TRUCK. “Hard to be mad when I look that good.”

“Your hair matches the truck. Marvelous.” This is a funny line, but the way Barbara’s voice is on the verge of breaking. I’m going to McFucking lose it, and Melissa hears it too.

“You wanna talk about it?” Barbara initially shakes her head and repeats the same refrain she’s been peddling all episode, “I’m fine.” But then, because it’s Melissa, because she feels safe with her, she turns around and confides. “Been dealing with Gerald’s health.” There are tears in my eyes.

Melissa, wide-eyed, so goddamn tender: “Barb.” / “We had a prostrate situation.”

Melissa puts a hand on Barbara’s arm: “Oh, no. Oh, my gosh. Is he okay?” All of the mirth Mel has displayed throughout the entire episode is gone. She’s so present and sensitive to Barbara Howard.

“Yeah, doctor call this morning, said he is in the clear.” / Melissa, exhaling in relief: “Oh, thank God.” / “But those PSA numbers came back high. And y-y’know, the past few days, just waiting to find out the results, it’s been stressful.” / “Of course. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t know.” Melissa’s voice being as gentle as it is literally going to break me.

“Well, all I could do was light my candle and pray… what was I gonna do? Sit around and worry about it all day? That never does any good.” Sheryl Lee Ralph, I’m sending you my therapy bill, and also nominating you for another Emmy. 😭

“Right? That’s life. Just always something coming at ya. You just gotta keep on truckin’.”

“I mean, if we were to blab every time life got hard, we would be…” / “Janine.” / GOD WKQOWKWDNKEJWJEJDNSS.

“Janine,” Barbara repeats, and they both laugh. Melissa teased that beautiful laugh out of her, and you can see that Barb has exhaled a little bit, just being able to confide in one of the people she loves and trusts most in this world. Don’t talk to me for 3-7 business days. I’m a WRECK.

“Oh, I’m glad he’s okay, honey.” And Mel goes in for the hug, but Barb’s back in composure mode, and she resists the full version. She’s still clearly… unsettled. 😭

MEL STEALING THE FIREFIIGHTER’S KEYS SJSJIWJS.

IT’S A FIFTY-SEVEN STEP RECIPE. AKQKWNSNWJS.

Jacob engineering a situation where they can use the aerial for Melissa. That’s his work mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Well, either way, I will not be lighting my candle anymore. And that’s life, right? Right?” 😭 Life has only taught her that she has to repress the things that give her comfort. Ma’am.

BARBARA CONSOLING HER STUDENT. I’M INCONSOLABLE.

“You know it’s okay to feel scared. You don’t have to pretend that you’re not. Pretending can make it harder.” And then she reaches out and offers the student her hand. “You know; sometimes Mrs. Howard gets scared… and upset too.” Her smile briefly falls, her mask. “And that’s okay. Okay?” I’m sk fucking. I am 😭😭😭

MELISSA ON THE AERIAL!!!!!! JACOB BEING PUMPED.

“Ooh, should she really be up there in heels?” / “She’s wearing a helmet.” AKQOQKWISNSJ

“Hey, why don’t you try playing a sport that actually involves balls—like downhill skiing.” AQoqojqqoJQJWJDJD.

The Schemmentis being a legend. 😭 THE FIRE BEING STARTED BY HER OTHER UNCLE. “And I’m not snitching. He’s proud of it!”

Barbara clearing things up with the counselor!!! The counselor suggesting a day off!!!!!!!!! The counselor KNOWING that she can’t call it a mental health day because Barbara would never take it because she doesn’t consider her mental health as being a valid reason for taking care of herself. 😭

Barb taking the day off!!!!!!!!

“Just because you’ve got a round face like the Teletubbies sun baby doesn’t mean that the world revolves around you.” OQKQWKSNSNSN, AVA, MA’AM, I MISSED YOU. They write the funniest shit for her.

Ava trying to send Barb to the spa!! Barb spending time with her hubby. Listen, I’m sentimental.

MELISSA THINKING THE COOKIES ARE DELICIOUS SJSJDJS.

Perfect, perfect, perfect episode. I’m not going to stop thinking about it for five weeks. Oh, my God.

#maggie blogs #abbott elementary spoilers #s: abbott elementary

[thenerdybaker523]

12 Days of Christmas: December 24

@12daysofchristmas @zsjaywhite

Title: Two Christmas Surprises (Or is it Three?)

Theme: December 24 (Presents)

Fandom/Character: Orange Cassidy

Warnings: Fluff

Word Count: 770

❄ I don’t own any of the GIFs or Photos in this.

❄️ Sequel to Snowy Kisses.

❄ James ~ Orange Cassidy ❄ Dustin `~ Chuck ❄

Abigail’s POV:

Since James and I had arrived at Dustin’s house last night, I’d had a little follower. Walter had not left me alone, anywhere I went, Walter was right there with me. He even slept in the bed with me and James, much to Dustin’s dismay. Waking up before James and Dustin, I decided to make breakfast for all of us. Changing into some sweatpants, sweatshirt, and a pair of heavy socks, I headed down stairs and started on breakfast with Walter trailing behind me. I was halfway through making pancakes when Dustin and James came downstairs. Dustin came over and kissed my cheek before grabbing a cup of coffee. I turned my head and kissed James before he went and got some coffee. They both leaned against the counters on either side of me, Walter keeping an eye on both men from his spot by the fridge. 

After we ate, I told Dustin that I needed to grab something from my old room. James ended up following me upstairs. What I had missed was the looks Dustin and James exchanged. Grabbing Dustin’s gift, I went to head back downstairs, James stayed and said he had to make a phone call quickly then he’d be down. Not thinking anything of it, I headed back downstairs to where Dustin was waiting in the living room. With Dustin’s back to me, I quickly hid his present behind a throw pillow on the couch, then I sat down only for Walter to jump up on my lap and lay down. Dustin went to pet him, when he got a glare from his dog.

“What the heck did you do to my dog? He’s been following you everywhere since you guys got here last night.” he said while looking away, a pout of his face from being rejected by Walter.

Knowing exactly what was going on, I smiled down at Walter and pet his head. “Maybe he misses me since I moved in with James. He doesn’t get to see me all the time like when I was living with you.”

Just as Dusting was getting ready to reply, James came downstairs and sat beside me, putting his arm on the back of the couch behind me. Looking at him, he subtly nodded that it was time.  Grabbing the present from behind the pillow, I cleared my throat and got Dustin’s attention.

“We know that Christmas is tomorrow, but James and I have a present we wanted to give you today.” Handing him his gift, he sat down in his armchair and opened it. He looked in the box then looked at us then looked back down in the box. I could see his eyes getting misty as he pulled out the onesie that we had made for him.

“I’m really gonna be an Uncle?” Dustin asked, looking up at us. When we nodded, he got up and pulled me in for a hug, making sure not to squish Walter. After he let me go, he pulled James in for a hug too. He couldn’t stop smiling as he sat back down. “That explains why Walter won’t leave you alone. How far along are you?”

“I’m about 15 weeks. We wanted to get through the first trimester before saying anything to anyone. You’re actually the first person we’ve told.” Dustin’s smile got even bigger knowing he knew before our mom and dad. He sent a look James’ way, and this time I noticed. 

Reaching into his pocket, James pulled out a small box and turned to face me. Looking between him and Dustin, I was extremely confused. James nervously cleared his throat, gaining my attention completely on him. He started fidgeting with the box as he began to nervously speak. “So I’ve talked to both your dad and Dustin about this, and they both gave me permission. Now I just need to ask you. I love you with my whole heart, the mother of my child, and any future children, if you want more that is. Will you Abigail Howard do me the honor of marrying me and becoming Mrs. Abigail Cipperly?” I let out a choked sob and nodded my head yes. James opened the box to a beautiful ring.

He slid the ring on my finger and pulled me in for a kiss. Dustin decided then it was a good time to make himself known again. As we pulled away, James wiped the tears away, then we looked at Dustin.

“So are there any other surprises, or is that it for this year?” He asked.

Looking between them, I smirked. “Well…”

#12daysofchistmas2022 #orange cassidy fanfiction #aew fanfiction

[stevetonyweekly]

SteveTony Weekly - July 31

Happy Sunday!! Here’s what I read this week. Be sure to leave your author a comment or kudos if you enjoy a story! 

***Marks my recent favorites 

~*~ 

Happy Lights by ladyshadowdrake 

An interdimensional portal opens over New York and drops a tentacled alien in the middle of Central Park. The Avengers are called out to investigate, and hopefully return the visitor home. Steve has been brushing up on his diplomacy, but he never expected to be a liaison to an alien in such an intimate capacity, or that the alien would be so friendly, and the unusual visit turns into the world's best team-building exercise.

Strange Turns by ladyshadowdrake

“You know how this works,” Tony interrupted, “Bucky is Steve colony. Colony keeps Steve warm. Colony keeps Bucky warm. He’s one of yours, so he’s one of ours. End of story."

Sequel to "Happy Lights"

Falling From Oaks by ladyshadowdrake

They may have brought him home, but he's still more Winter Soldier than Bucky, and he doesn't understand what his new master and handlers want from him.

Bucky's long transition from Winter Soldier to a human again, with a little help from the colony.

Happy (Christmas) Lights by ladyshadowdrake

The colony pays a visit to earth just in time for Christmas.

I'll turn hours into gardens by nanasekei

Every week, a plant arrives.

forged on low heat by ArabellaAM 

When they tell him his hand’s been promised without him knowing about it, Tony swears he can feel his blood boiling under his skin.

Or, Warlord Steve appears in the Stark's Clan territory one morning and Howard offers his son to him.

For This, I am Thankful by Corsets_and_Cardigans

“Dad, are you going to spend Thanksgiving with Mr. Steve?” Peter tugged on the bottom edge of Tony’s peacoat. It was too adorable for words. Steve had a feeling those big brown eyes had everyone wrapped around his little finger.

“Well, Peety, I-”

“Dodger will be there. And Mr. Steve and Mr. Bucky and you told Momma that you wouldn’t be alone on Thanksgiving.”

Steve tried his best to hide his snickering behind his fist.

Tony heaved a sigh, “Well, if Dodger is there, I guess I’ll go."

***

Newly divorced Dad Tony spends Thanksgiving with his attractive new neighbor.

Teddy Bear Status by tazziebubbles

“So are we gonna talk about this?”

There was a pause. Then-

“Talk about what?”

His gaze flicked to Steve, who was currently pressed up against him in every way imaginable, arms around his waist, head tucked into the crook of his neck, legs tangled with his own. He could even feel the occasional flutter of his eyelashes.

Tony snorted. “Oh yeah, what could there possibly be to talk about?”

~

In which Tony almost dies (yet again) and a certain supersoldier becomes awfully touchy. Not that he minds.

Quiet Worship by sidium

He should let him sleep, really, he knows this. He should go back to sleep, or carefully get up, maybe make a cup of coffee, or a million other things that would allow Steve to stay in the position he’s in, peaceful and dreaming.

Kindergarten Romance by JehBeeEh

Parenting is hard.

Being forced into e-learning with kindergarten aged kids is its own form of hell.

Steve and Tony meet during one such event.

Don't Leave Me This Way by FestiveFerret

Tony can see a way out, but he has to go alone.

Death By A Thousand Cuts by DispiritedSpitfire

Twitter Prompt: "Imagine if Steve hugged Tony in Siberia instead of fighting back."

This Wasn't What the Brochure Promised by kahn for Settiai

Tony, Steve, Clint and Bruce spend quality time together in a cave. Tony does not build another arc reactor (even if he sort of needs one). Steve is all Protective Leader. Clint is terrifyingly good with a knife. Bruce bleeds and snarks. There is banter and embarassing amounts of schmoop and the boys get very touchy-feely.

Written for the cap_ironman holiday fic exchange (I'm late posting it here).

Safeword by melannen

Tony Stark doesn't need to be safe, sane, and consensual. He has JARVIS instead. (Then he gets Steve.)

Wild Pitch by FestiveFerret, the_crown_jules

Rookie pitcher Tony Stark says he’s the most exciting thing to happen to the New York Shields in years. It’s hard for veteran catcher Steve Rogers to feel that way about Tony’s volatile pitching and frequent game ejections—especially when the Shields coaches have tasked Steve with reining the rookie in.

Getting excited about Tony himself, though? That is, unfortunately, all too easy.

You’re Walking a Little Funny by jellybeanforest

Steve notices that the Avengers’ benefactor, billionaire Tony Stark, gets injured surprisingly often for a civilian. New bruises and abrasions mottle what little skin is exposed and the stiff way he holds himself speaks to additional hidden injuries. Steve doesn’t want to pry, but perhaps the personal relationship between Stark and his ex-girlfriend-slash-new-CEO, Pepper Potts, is less cordial than he had initially supposed.

Nat claims it's not what he thinks, Iron Man is offended he even asked, and Clint?

Well...

"Knowing Mr. Stark’s reputation, it’s probably a sex thing."

Remix of “Noticed Hurts” by Lets_call_me_Lily for the 2021 Cap-IronMan Remix Exchange.

The Sweetest of Dreams by iam93percentstardust

After coming back to the Compound, Steve takes a moment to breathe and return to his old room. Tony takes a moment to flirt and ask Steve out on their first official date.

A Night Out by Neverever 

Tony and Steve's date goes wrong and then Tony finds out that Steve wants something unexpected out of their relationship.

Happily Ever After by JehBeeEh

“You and Steve found each other kinda like in the story, and you’re going to live happily ever after!”

“You think so, huh?” Tony replied, amused at how Morgan's little mind worked.

“I know so. Steve told me,” she replied in her adorably childish, matter-of-fact way.

Rollin' and Tumblin' by Muccamukk

The giant squid spewing sex pollen wasn't the strangest part of anyone's week. Captain America's behaviour after the fact, however, was making Tony wonder how deeply they were all affected, and what exactly was going on.

#stevetony weekly #stevetony fic #stevetony fic recs #fic rec #stevetony #superhusband #iron man #captain america #stony #steve rogers #tony stark

[thatblackravenclaw]

You

Masterlist

Cassie Howard x fem!reader

word count: 981

warning(s): literally just fluff, tiny drug use

I should’ve known better than to think I could study with Cassie here. Ever since I opened my book ten minutes ago, she’s been sighing louder with every minute that passes.

“Babe! Babe. You know you could study too.”

“I could, but that’ boring.” She says before letting out another dramatic sigh.

I could continue trying to study, but I know it wouldn’t get me anywhere. Cassie is one of the most stubborn people I know.

“Alright, love. What do you want to do?” I ask while turning full around in my chair.

She looks me dead in my eyes and shrugs her shoulders. I deadpan her and turn back around.

“I can’t believe you pouted and sighed just to say you don’t know what you want to do.” I decide to still pack up my supplies. Either way I wasn’t going to get any studying done, so I’ll just try again when I get home.

As I’m packing my stuff back in my book bag I head Cassie gasp. I look over to see her looking at her phone, unblinking.

“There’s a pop up carnival tonight! We have to go!”

That actually doesn’t sound half bad. I haven’t been to a carnival since like middle school. Coincidentally enough, I stopped going because I would get so caught up in my studies. I raise my eyebrows in intrigue.

“Sure. What the hell. What time do you want to go?” I ask while swinging my backpack onto my shoulder.

“An hour good for you?” She asks, finally looking up at me.

“Sounds like a plan.” I kiss her forehead and then walk out of her bedroom. I’m almost out the front door when her mom stops me. I look in her direction to see her beckoning me over to the couch where she is.

“Yes, Mrs. Howard?” I ask while sitting down next to her.

“I told you to call me Suze.” She says with a smile while grabbing my hand. “I just wanted to thank you. You’re a great girlfriend to Cassie and an amazing best friend to Lexi. They’ve been so out of it since their dad left, but you’re able to keep a smile on their faces, so thank you.”

“I would kill for those two.” I say avoiding eye contact with her, knowing that I would start tearing up if I did. “Cass and I are going to the carnival tonight. I’ll be back in about an hour to pick her up.” With that I nod my head, slip my hand out of hers and start towards the door again.

Many people don’t own record players anymore. I think they’re timeless. Every day when I get home, I pick a random vinyl, put it on the turntable, and then just vibe. That was cheesy. Like really cheesy. Like 80s romcom cheesy, but seriously, I just put it on and go on with my day.

The environment just feels different when using a record player rather than a speaker. Like right now, having my turntable play Material Girl while I get ready just brightens up my spirits.

I haven’t exactly decided what I’m wearing yet. I’ve been dancing around my room like that one scene from To All The Boys: P.S. I Love You when Lara Jean was dancing around in her room before her date with Peter. It’s just a carnival, so I’m not too worried about it. I’m just gonna stick with the distressed jeans that I’m already wearing. It’s warm right now, but it’s probably gonna get cooler later. Screw it I’m wearing this top. It’s my favorite actually. The lilac goes beautifully with my skin tone and the cutesy design takes away from the fact that you can see most of my stomach since the top pinches right between my breasts.

I look at my phone and realize I have ten minutes to get to Cassie’s I didn’t realize how much time has passed. I take a quick CBD gummy (they’re for my anxiety, but they give a good buzz considering it’s 600mg), grab my purse backpack and my keys, and head out the door.

I pull up in front of Cass’ house and of course she’s not ready yet. I texted Lexi, but apparently she’s going with Rue and Jules. I can’t help but become jealous of her and Rue’s friendship. I wonder if you could even call it that. Before Rue decided to get clean again, she was terrible to Lexi. She would only talk to her if she needed her to pee in a cup. Now, apparently they’re besties.

I can’t think about it anymore. It’ll ruin my good mood. I honk my horn to hurry Cassie. I love her to death, but it’s been five minutes and we’re just going to the carnival.

She rushes out the but flips me off before she turns to close the front door. I get a good look at her outfit. A powder blue crop tank with a skirt that’s a different shade of blue. She looks great. She always looks great. I just can’t help but think about what everyone else will think. There are plenty of guys out there that would love to take her from me. McKay thinks he’s slick, but I’ve seen him check her out multiple times.

I feel a kiss to my cheek and realize that Cassie got in the car while I was in my head.

“What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?”

I turn to look at her, but I really look. I look into her eyes. See if I can target how she feels right now.

“You.” I say truthfully.

“As you should.” She says before giving me a peck on the lips.

I roll my eyes and then drive off to the festival with her hand in mine.

#cassie howard fanfic #cassie howard fluff #cassie howard #cassie howard fic #euphoria imagine #euphoria fic

[geese-howards-transscriber]

A drabble requested by @eboni-napalm of Billy Kane comforting them/offering advice before a KOF tournament. Thank you for your patience!

Word count: 411

Warnings: Mentions of violence

    “Oi, ya feelin’ alright?” Billy asked, his brows furrowed with concern. He had known that Geese’s choice to add Elise to his picks for the King of Fighters tournament had weighed heavily on their mind, and it was beginning to show. Elise seemed stiff in their movements, their body tense and their eyes seeming tired, yet restless– it looked like they had not slept for a while. If Billy had to take a guess, Elise had not been getting adequate sleep, likely due to nerves.

    “Hmm? Oh.” Elise smiled tiredly as they faced Billy. “Everything’s fine. Just… nervous. Y’know?”

    Billy walked over to his bandmate and sparring partner, staff slung over his shoulders. “If it means anythin’, I’m a li’l shaky, too.”

    “Really?” Elise cocked their head ever-so-slightly at what Billy had said. “You’ve been fighting in tournaments longer than I have, and you’re nervous about it?”

    “Yeah.” Billy shrugged. “It’s like… goin’ on tour, almost. Your team’s like your band, y’gotta work together to put on the best show you can. Even I get performance anxiety, love.”

    Elise considered what he said. “You never seem nervous when you’re on stage.”

    “Learnin’ to hide it is all part of the job, really. Besides–” Billy pulled them in with his free hand. “– I think you’re gonna do a better job than either me or Mr. Howard, even if only because you get really angry when someone tries to hurt me.”

    Elise huffed out a laugh, and seemed to relax, even if only slightly. “Am I really that protective of you?”

    “You kiddin’?” Billy said with a grin. “Remember when someone tried to heckle me at one of my shows and you beat the piss out of ‘em?”

    “That was one time,” Elise said, grinning just as wide and trying to bite back laughter.

    “Still proves my point,” Billy exclaimed, before trying to remember what his point actually was. He hummed, before finally getting back to it. “Point is, love, if you ever need a reason to win… don’t think of it as doin’ it for Mr. Howard. Think of it as doin’ it for me.” He gave Elise a peck on the forehead, considered, then leaned their face up for a kiss. After their lips parted, he offered a smile. “Think we’ve got some time for a quick spar. What d’you say? Maybe it’ll help you get some sleep t’night.”

    “You’re on,” they said with a cocky smirk, rolling up their sleeves.

#request #kof #billy kane #fanfic

[niiicedave]

Frank Zappa and The Mothers - “Billy The Mountain (Live At Pauley Pavilion, UCLA, Los Angeles, 1971)”

Billy the mountain Billy the mountain A regular picturesque Postcardy mountain Residing between lovely Rosamond and Gorman With his stunning wife Ethell A tree! A tree!

Billy was a mountain Ethel was a tree Growing off of his shoulder Billy was a mountain Ethel was a tree Growing off of his shoulder

Billy had two big Caves for eyes With a cliff for a jaw That would go up 'n down And whenever it did He'd puff out some dust And hack up a boulder (hack!) Hack up a boulder (hack! hack!) Hack up a boulder (hack! hack! hack!) Hack up a boulder

Now, one day, a man in a checkered suit drove up in a big Lincoln continental, and he laid a huge Bulging envelope right at the corner of billy the mountain Right where his 'foot' was supposed to be Now, billy the mountain, he couldn't believe it! All those postcards he'd posed for, for over these years And finally, now, at last, his royalties! Royalties! [repeat: x5] You might also like Call Any Vegetable (Live) Frank Zappa Tears Began to Fall Frank Zappa Bobby Brown (Goes Down) Frank Zappa Billy the mountain was rich! his eyeball-caves widened in amazement His cliff (which was his jaw), it dropped thirty feet! Ooh, a bunch of dust puffed out! rocks and boulders hacked up (hack! hack! hack! hack hack! hack! hack!) crushing 'the Lincoln'! Now, the man in the checkered suit, well Without his car he went screaming off into the desert at sunset All the way to Rosamond to get a beer and tell everybody there Including Ronnie Cook what had happened to his car I gave him the money He acted real funny He hocked up a rock and It totaled my car!

Oh, do you Know any trucks Might be bound for the Valley? I don't want to stand here All night in this bar (dear lord)

I don't want to stand here All night in this bar (no shit!)

I don't want to stand here All night in this bar! By two o'clock, and the bars are already closed down Billy had already broken 'the big news' to Ethel With dust and boulders everywhere, billy, choked with excitement, announced "Ethel, we're going on a vacation!"

Yes, and they were going on a vacation! (oh, and Ethel, Ethel, Ethel, Ethel just like a woman Of course she was delighted! she creaked a little bit And some old birds flew off of her Hey, Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song) Billy told Ethel they were going to They were going to New York! "Ethel, we're going to New York!" But first they were gonna stop in Las Vegas It's off to Las Vegas To check out the lounges Pull a few handles Drink a few beers (oh, Ethel!)

Ethel, my darling You know that I love you! I'm glad we could have a Vacation this year! (oh, neet-o!)

Glad we could have a Vacation this year!

They left that night, crunchin' across the mojave desert Their voices echoing through the canyons of your minds "Ethel, want to get a cuppa cawfee?" (Howard Johnson's! [Repeat: 4x])

"there's a Howard Johnsons! want to eat some clams?" The first noteworthy piece of real estate they destroyed was Edwards Air Force Base And to this very day, 'wing nuts' and data reduction clerks alike Speak in reverent whispers about that fateful night when Test stand number one and the rocket sled itself got LUNCHED! By a famous mountain-in and his small, wooden wife Good bye to Las Vegas Farewell to the lounges We pulled a few handles We drank a few beers

Guess that George Putnam Should be on the air now With the biggest new story That has broken this year (George Putnam!)

His biggest new story That has broken this year (Take it away, George!)

"Word just in to the KTTV news service undeniably links This mountain and his wife to drug abuse And pay-offs as part of a San Joaquin Valley smut ring! However, we can assure parents in the Southern California area That a recent narcotics crack-down In Torrance, Hawthorne, Lomita Westchester, Playa del Rey, Santa Monica Tujunga, Sunland, San Fernando, Pacoima, Sylmar Newhall, Canoga Park Palmdale, Glendale, Irwindale Rolling Hills, Granada Hills, Shadow Hills, Cheviot Hills Will provide the secret evidence The Palmdale grand jury has needed to seek a criminal indictment And pave the way for stiffer legislation, increased federal aid And avert a crippling strike of bartenders and veterinarians throughout the inland empire But it is this reporter's opinion that Ethel is a former Communist" Within the week, Jerry Lewis had hosted a telethon ("wah wah wah, nice lady!") to raise funds for the injured (injured) and homeless (homeless) in Denver As Billy had just levelled it, and, a few miles right outside of town Billy caused a 'Oh Mein Papa' in the earth's crust Right over the secret underground dumps where they keep the pools of old poison gas And obsolete germ bombs, just as a freak tornado cruised through (my baby, my baby, my baby, my baby) [repeat: x3]

Sucking up two thirds of it (suck! suck! suck!) For untimely dispersal over vast stretches of ... WATTS! Now, it was about this time, I think it was right outside of Columbus, Ohio that billy got his notice to report for his induction physical Now, believe me, Ethel said she wasn't gonna let him go!

"I'm not gonna let you go, billy!" And george putnam, the right-wing creepo fascist pig newscaster from los angeles said (take it away george putnam The right-wing fascist radical creepo pig newscaster from los angeles!)

"we now have confirmed reports from an informed orange county minister That ethell is still an active communist And it's this reporter's opinion that she also practices witch-craft!"

It was about this time that the telephone rang in the secret briefcase Belonging to the one mortal man Who might be able to stop all of this senseless destruction and save 'america herself'!

Now, some men say he looked like (he looked like) Felix Pappalardi (Felix Pappalardi); still others say (others say) Bullshit, man (bullshit, man) he was just born (he was born) Next to the frozen beef pies at Gristede's (frozen beef pies) Still others say (others say he was just another) Again, he was just a crazy Italian (crazy Italian) who drove a red car You see it was hard to tell (but nobody knows) Nobody knew for sure (for sure) He was so (so) mysterious (mysterious) Oh yes, he was He was so (he was so, he was so!) Mysterious!

He was so Mysterious!

Cause when a person gets to be Such a hero, folks And marvelous beyond compute You can never really tell About a guy like that (whether he's really a nice person Or if he just smiles a lot) (what?) Or if he has a son named 'pinocchio' Or what?

Whether he's really a nice person or if he has a son named 'pinocchio' or what? Some men say he could fly Some men say he could swim Others say he could sing (like neil sedaka) And all the girls in flushing Would be amazed of him (two, three!) Amazed of him!

Time passes... January, February, March, July Wednesday August Irwindale 2:30 in the afternoon Sunday! Monday... Funny Cars! Walnut! Friday City of Industry Big John Mazamanian!

So when the phone rang In the secret briefcase (thank you) A strong masculine hand With a wristwatch And flexy bracelet Grabbed it And answered In a deep, calmly assured voice:

"yes, this is he! what? a mountain with a tree growing off of its shoulder? You're fulla shit, man, what? what, uh, are, are you sure? Oh well, alright, let me write this down then, sorta take a few notes here, to new york? Causing untold destruction?" (my baby, my baby, my baby, my baby, oh! My baby, my baby, my baby, my baby My baby, my baby My baby, my baby, my baby My baby, my baby) (my baby, my baby, my baby)

"wanted for draft evasion? Can I, can I fly there immediately and reason with him? An expense account? and per diem, too?" Some men say he could dance! Yes, he could dance And here it is, ladies and gentlemen The studebaker hoch dancing lesson & cosmic prayer for guidance featuring aynsley dunbar Twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, hey! Right hand from the heart-uh (professional) Left hand from the heart-uh (exquisite) Right hand from the heart-uh (homunculus) Left hand from the left shoulder To the heart-uh

Twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, twirly, hey! There were a number of rumors circulating about studebaker hoch recently Consider if you will the rumors that have spread that he could write The lord's prayer on the head of a pin! Some men say he could write the lord's prayer On the head of a Head of a Head of a pin (three dog night) (yeah)

Other still maintain the fact! (good god!) He was born next to the frozen beef pies (and that was the main influence on him!)

Boldly springing into action, he phoned his wife (who ran a modeling school) Whereupon she he ran around the back of 'gimbel's' To see if he could find some big un-used cardboard boxes

After which, he hit up gristede's for some 'kaiser broiler foil' Some 'aunt jemima syrup', and a pair of blunt scissors! hey-hey! Yes, and in the parking lot across the street from the One fifth avenue hotel (in between a pair of customized trucks where nobody was looking) He cut out a pair of really, really nice wings, and he covered 'em thoroughly with foil . . . thoroughly with foil thoroughly with foil . . . thoroughly with foil . . . thorougly with foil Thoroughly with foil Thoroughly with with foil!

Then he took those 'wings' And wedged one under each of his powerful arms and sneaked into a telephone booth

He closed the door! and he pulled down his gray denim bus driver type pants And he spread even amounts of aunt jemima syrup all over the inside of his legs Right underneath his boxer pretty shorts, ha ha ha! Soon the booth was filling with flies! (help me, help me, help me!) He held open the legs of his boxer shorts so they could all get in Yes! and when each and every one of those little Each and every one of those little cocksuckin' flies had gone into his boxer shorts And was lapping up all that good aunt jemima syrup He bent over and he put his head between his legs And he said to those little flies in a clear, impressive voice "new york!" And the booth and everything lifted up, out of the parking lot, and into the sky! Studebaker Yeah, yeah Studebaker Studebaker

Studebaker Yeah, yeah Studebaker Studebaker

He's coating his legs With aunt jemima syrup up and down!

His shorts'll be filled with flies That will be buzzing all around! (help me, help me, help me!)

Stoodlabaker hoch He's really outa sight! Stoodlabaker hoch He does it every night! Stoodlabaker hoch He treats the flies all right Stoodla-baker hoch That's why they never bite, hey!

(please to new york! Fly to new york!)

He could be a dog Or a frog Or a lesbian queen!

(fly to new york!) He could be a nark Or a lady marine!

Or he might play dirty! He's over thirty! (getting old? say! I don't know!)

His peculiar attire And the flies he require Keep leading him on Cause ethell is gone And the mountain she's on

(please to new york! Fly to new york!)

(fly to new york!) (i don't know!) His peculiar attire And the flies he require Keep leading him on Cause ethell is gone They keep leading him on Cause ethell is gone And the mountain she's on

We join studebaker hoch standing on the edge of billy the mountain's mouth "billy? I've come to reason with you! Our great country needs you in the armed forces! Why, it's all fair and square, the lottery, you know? your number came up You can't go on running like this forever." Ethell shook her twigs angrily, but studebaker hoch, un-ferturbed, continued "listen, you (cough cough) listen, you communist son-of-a-bitch! You better get your ass down there for your fuckin' physical Or I'll see to it that you get used for fill dirt In some impending new jersey marsh reclamation And your girl-friend here will wind up disguised as a series of brooms Primitive ironing boards (or a dog house) Get the (cough, cough), get the picture?" Billy just laughed "ho, ho, ho! if they think they're gonna draft me, they're crazy!" Now you'd remember that studebaker hoch was standing on the edge of billy's mouth So that when he laughed, he lost his balance and unfortunately fell Screaming, two hundred feet into the rubble below!

(that was only one hundred feet, you carnaby cutie Let's hear another set!)

Which only goes to prove A mountain is something You don't want to fuck with You don't want to fuck with Don't fuck around (don't fuck around)

Don't fuck with billy And don't fuck with ethell

(you saw what just happened To the guy with the flies!)

Don't fuck around! [repeat: x7]

With Biddilly, biddilly Biddilly, biddilly, biddilly

Biddilly The Mountin!

Biddilly The Mountin!

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[fardell24b]

Daria’s Rugrats - Chapter 1 - Part 1

Nearly Four Years Later

Tommy's Birthday

11 June 1991

Daria awoke. She sat up in the bed, she then recalled that it was her brother's birthday. Or rather, adopted younger brother, but she rarely thought about that. Her current Mom and Dad were better than what she could remember of her biological Mom and Dad. 'Happy Birthday, Tommy,' she thought. She got up and got dressed.

Once dressed, she left her room. She could hear her parents in her brother's room, saying 'Happy Birthday'.

She went downstairs.

As she started breakfast, she could hear her parents talking about the day, particularly her father being enthusiastic about a toy he had made.

Her Mom placed Tommy in the high chair, and proceded to feed him. “Now, what does Lipschitz say, Stu. We need to distract him.”

That got Daria's attention. “You doin't need to distract him,” she said.

“Yes we do,” her mother said as she turned her attention back to Tommy. “OK, Tommy. Open the Pod bay door!'

Daria sighed. She was sure whatever Lipschitz recommended wasn't helpful at all. Tommy flinched.

“A little to the left, Stu,” her mother directed.

This time her father managed to get the food in Tommy's mouth.

“Stu, Daria, let's do the birthday checklist,” Didi directed, once Tommy had his breakfast.

“OK, Shoot,” Stu said.

“Um, carrot brand cake with health nuggets.”

“Check,” Stu said.

“Pin the tail on the Donkey.”

“The version with suction cups?” Daria asked rhetorically. “Check!”

“The puppet show?”

"Oh, yeah. Puppeteers, stage, props, and puppets arrive at eleven," Stu said.

“Perfect!” Didi said.

Daria sighed. She saw her grandfather approaching. “A puppet show for one-year-olds? Why, the little sprats aren't even gonna remember it!”

“It will make for good baby photo embarrasment opportunities,” Daria snarked.

“Daria!” Didi admonished.

“She makes a good point!” her grandfather said.

“Besides, do we want to be remembered as the family that settled for less?”

Betty DeVille rang the Pickles doorbell. The door opned. “Hi, Daria.”

“Hi, Mrs. Deville.”

“How are you, Daria?”

“I'm fine. Totally ready for Tommy's Birthday,” Daria answered. “How are Phil and Lill?”

“They're fine, but we also have little Chuckster,” Betty said.

Her husband, Howard moved aside allowing young Chuckie Finster to come forward.

“Hey, you think we could just pen these pups?” Betty asked.

“Over there,” Daria said. She bent down to Chuckie's level. “Hi, Chuckie.”

The red haired boy refused to make eye contact, instead lowering his gaze.

'To be expected,' Daria thought. She looked over to where her grandfather was complaining.

“Puppet show for one-year-olds? Why, when I was a spud, we didn't have puppet shows! "If we wanted entertainment, we went out back and pulled up stumps!”

“He's always, like that, don't worry,” she said to Chuckie. She stood up. “You know where it is,” she said to Mrs. DeVille.

“That I do.”

Chuckie and the twins joined Tommy in the playpen. The adults all ran outside chasing Spike, leaving Daria to watch them. (Except she continued reading a book she had been reading earlier.)

“I have one word to say to you,” Tommy said to his friends.

“What?” Phil and Lil asked at the same time.

“Dog food,” Tommy said.

“Dog food?” the twins asked.

“Dog food. I tried to get some from Spike's bowl, but Grandpa stopped me,” Tommy explained.

“Why would you want to eat that stuff?” Chuckie asked.

“Well, Spike eats it, and look at him!”

They looked out the window in the yard, where Spike was running around.

“He can do anything he wants to. He even gets to sleep in the flowers! Maybe, if we eat that dog food, we'll turn into dogs!" Tommy explained.

Lil watched Tommy's grandfather shoo Spike away from the flowerbed. “You mean we get to sleep in the flowers?”

Phil watched the dog lick Lou in the face. “And lick people?”

“And wear a collar with our names on it?” Lil added.

Chuckie saw Spike scratch himself. “I don't know. Maybe it's not such a good idea. Dogs don't have it so good. They always get fleas and junk.”

“Fleas? Let do it,” the twins proclaimed.

Didi came to the playpen. “Oh, I almost forgot to put on their little party hats!” she said.

“I still think that's a bad idea!” Daria objected. She sat down next to the playpen. “I don't like them either!” she said to Tommy.

“She's right,” Betty said. “They'll stay on for, oh, three minutes tops!”

“Get in the picture, Daria,” Didi said, gesturing with her camera.

Daria sighed and sat in the playpen. She put Tommy in her lap. “Like this?”

“Yes,” Didi said. She took the picture, as Tommy was beginning to squirm in Daria's grasp, Chuckie was backing away and the twins were showing signs of restlessness. “Done!”

“Good!” Daria grouched.

“Hey. Isn't it time to bust the pinata?” Betty asked.

“Let's wait until all the kids get here!” Didi said.

“Well, who's missing?” Betty asked.

“Daria and Tommy's cousin, Angelica,” Didi answered. She noticed Daria frowning at that.

“Oh, right, Angelica.”

#betty deville #chuckie finster #daria #daria morgendorffer #didi pickles #fanfic #lili deville #lou pickles #phil deville #rugrats #stu pickles #tommy pickles #tommy's first birthday

[mrs-jake-blues]

Since Daniel Stern is literally from Bethesda, Bethesda needs to put him in a game

#they should’ve had him is a character in the Bethesda ruins in FO3 #daniel stern #Bethesda #bethesda game studios #Todd Howard #fallout #fallout 3 #I’m gonna have a word with mr Howard

[odekirk]

if u feel up to explaining i am curious about how you interpret howard's treatment of kim like what you think motivates him to be tough on her and how you think he interprets their relationship

WHY YES I WOULD LOVE TO TALK ABOUT THIS AT LENGTH...

i obviously have a more sympathetic view of howard than a lot of fans do. i wish i could remember whether i was willing to sympathize with him from the beginning or whether i too hated him for a long time before grudgingly coming around, but unfortunately i watched better call saul in such a feverish binge that i can't very well remember the progression of my feelings.

i do remember that one of my first lightbulb moments, in terms of not just sympathizing with howard but actually loving him as a character, came when rewatching this scene from 109, where howard is again shutting jimmy down and jimmy loses it and says he's not gonna give them the case, calls him a pigfucker, et cetera. when you rewatch that scene with the knowledge that it's actually chuck pulling the strings and making howard do this, that look that howard gives to chuck becomes withering:

and it very much reminds me of kim in wexler v. goodman:

in both situations their partner’s scheming has put them in a really difficult and uncomfortable situation that they can’t back out of, and they’re angry about it, but they’re still loyal to their partner. (isn’t it fun how it’s the same word for both law partners and romantic partners?) both howard and kim can frequently be seen defending their partner and aligning with them even when they know they’re wrong -- although howard eventually gets fed up with chuck’s shenanigans, whereas kim was going full steam ahead the last we saw.

i don’t wanna get too far off on a tangent about the parallels between howard and kim; suffice it to say i think they’re definitely there, and while they obviously have very different backgrounds that have resulted in them being different people, i think that especially when it comes to these important relationships in their lives, they mirror each other.

SO I THINK HOWARD AND KIM HAVE A LOT IN COMMON. certainly a lot more than she would like to think. whether she likes it or not, by season five she’s a partner at a major law firm raking in plenty of money through her work on mesa verde’s expansion. at that point there is less separating her from howard hamlin than ever before, which is probably a big part of why she’s so angry with him. we know that mr. acker’s assessment of her as just another elitist lawyer really got under her skin -- so much so that she hired somebody to break into her client’s house to dig up dirt on him so that she could essentially blackmail him, thereby proving to mr. acker and to herself that she’s really in it for the little guy. she hates to be seen as a wealthy and successful lawyer. it doesn’t jibe with her image of herself at all. she still views herself as the poor kid with an unstable home life that she once was -- not the highly educated attorney who was able to waltz into rich schweikart’s office and offer herself a position as a partner at his prosperous firm.

(by the way, everyone, myself included, tends to assume that howard was born with a silver spoon in his mouth by virtue of the fact that his father gave him a job at his firm, but we actually don’t know that to be the case. kim herself is proof of the fact that people’s financial fortunes are very much subject to change over the course of years and decades. howard’s living in the lap of luxury now, that’s for damn sure, but we don’t know for a fact that he’s always been better off than the average person.)

but i’m getting off track again. the point is that while howard and kim do have a lot in common, she would hate to hear that. she would absolutely reject it. a lot of people who are reading this right now probably reject it. BUT I DON’T THINK HOWARD WOULD! i think howard really does like kim, and if he could be manifested physically in the real world and placed in front of a computer screen displaying the better call saul subreddit, i think he would be genuinely surprised to see how many people think that he HATES kim or wants to TANK HER CAREER.

so getting back to your actual question, with regard to his treatment of kim, let’s get a few things straight. first, kim is in doc review for all of about two weeks, TOTAL, across the two different times she was sent there: three days in 107, and ten days between 204 and 205.

second, she actually mentions in 201 that anyone who arrives late to that day’s meeting “could get stuck in doc review,” so it’s apparently a punishment that howard uses all the time. you can disagree with his management style, and if you’re kim, you can say “i don’t wanna work for a guy who does this, i’m quitting.” and she does! and it’s totally fine! but the idea among a lot of fans that he singles her out for some wildly disproportionate punishment is just not borne out by the facts. i don’t know enough about law firms or being a lawyer to know EXACTLY what kim expects her duties to be, or even what doc review really is, but my understanding is that it’s something that is probably within her job description, broadly. it’s not like he has her cleaning toilets.

so in essence, what a lot of people describe as “howard treats kim like SHIT and tries to DESTROY HER CAREER” could also be described as “when HHM employees do something wrong, howard makes them do everyone’s least favorite part of the job for a little while.” that sounds much less outrageous to me!

and if you accept the latter description, or at least accept something that is somewhere in between those two descriptions, it becomes a little easier to understand why patrick fabian is laboring under the delusion that there’s “warmth” between kim and howard and that “they like one another” (interview from around season 2), and that howard views kim as “like [his] daughter”* (interview from after season 5) whom he was very much still grooming for a bigger role at the firm when she left... completely at odds with how many fans view/describe howard; and again, probably something that kim would reject lol.

if i can conflate patrick fabian the actor with howard hamlin the character (and i will, since he does), howard clearly doesn’t really understand how his actions are interpreted by kim. he views his treatment of her as pretty uncomplicated and fair, and is clearly taken aback every time she expresses her seething resentment of him. in 510 he genuinely expects her to be appalled by his description of jimmy’s behavior (in other words, to have a reasonable reaction) and she instead laughs in his face. this has gone on long enough so i think i have to end it about here, but the bottom line is: howard completely misunderstands his relationship with kim both while she is working at HHM and after she quits, clearly believing that they are on good-to-neutral terms most of the time and oblivious to her anger towards him. it is his respect for her that leads him, in 510, to try to warn her about the perils of being loyal to a mcgill brother; and it is her hatred of what she sees in the “mirror” that leads her to want to destroy him.

and if you’re thinking to yourself, “wow, this is ENTIRELY too sympathetic to that pigfucker,” well,

 *re: the “like my daughter” comment, THIS IS WHY WE NEED TO SEE GEORGE HAMLIN... so that i can confirm that THAT old bastard is the reason why howard views this punitive management style as standard paternalistic behavior... GIVE ME GEORGE HAMLIN

#inbox #better call saul #howard hamlin

[fckwritersblock]

The Other Sinclair

Stranger Things; Black!reader x Everybody

Description: Lucas’ older sister gets back in town and is not very happy to hear about the events that took place. Especially when it comes to someone putting their hands on her little brother.

Warnings: I mean.....mild violence, but again this page is 18+ so y’all be aite

(Unedited .)

“5 minutes Lucas! I leave you guys for 5 got damn minutes and everything goes to shit!”

Y/n was livid.

It wasn’t really anyone’s intention for her to find out. Lucas knew better than to involve her unless he really needed to. If there was one thing she didn’t play about it with her family. It would’ve all been fine too, however when Y/n saw Steve, she asked what happened to his face and he couldn’t help but blurt everything out. Now, being that she was included in all the events the previous year it didn’t come as a surprise that the moment she left for 2 weeks for the cheerleading competition they’d get themselves into more shit.

“I just want to know what made him think he could put his hands on you!”

Now she knew about the new kid and his rivalry with Steve. That was purely their egos and a mess full of entirely too much testosterone and high school cliche for her to bother with. That would come to pass as Steve was proving to be less and less of asshole everyday. But to hear Steve’s face, though healing, looked like that as a result of protection her little brother and the rest of the kids..

No, ma’am.

“Was anyone gonna tell me?” She fussed at the preteens.

“It’s over, we handled it.” Lucas groaned knowing his words were falling on deaf ears.

“Uh huh. I’m sure.” The elder Sinclair rolled her eyes, arms crossed and hip poked out. “And this Billy kid is related to who? Your little girlfriend right?”

Y/n’s gaze quickly shifted to the girl in question.

“Yeah. H-hi. I’m Max.”

Y/n said nothing, just continued to stare and assess the child. Finally she smiled.

“Max, you look like a sweet kid and I really don’t wanna not like you. So spill. What’s his deal?”

Max twiddled her fingers only hesitated for a moment before she gave her boyfriend‘s sister the backstory on her stepbrother and his dad. Giving her a little bit of detail about how he also felt about black people.

“Interesting. And where can I find this Hargrove?” Y/n inquired.

“The arcade.” Max answered.

Nodding she went over to the front door of the Sinclair residence and opened the door.

“Ma, I’m taking the boys to the arcade with Steve.”

Barely take time to get a response, she grabbed her house keys off the hook and closed the door behind her.

“Y/n I don’t think-“ Steve began but she cut him of.

“Don’t hurt yourself doing that.”

“This isn’t a good idea.” Lucas mumbled.

“I don’t remember asking you.” Y/n replied.

“I forgot that’s where Erica gets it-“ Dustin commented in a failed attempt to whisper.

“Shut up Dustin. Everybody in the car.” She snatched the keys from Steve. “And I’m driving.”

The ride to the arcade was quiet, everyone afraid to speak as Y/n drove them the short distance a little quicker than usual. Soon as they pulled up, she parked randomly and they all hopped out.

“Where is he?”

Max looked around before pointing him out.

Once Y/n laid eyes on him she scoffed before rolling them. There stood Billy Hargrove leaning against his car with Tommy and a few girls fawning over him. He looked like the king of douche bags like he had some grade A daddy issues. Any other time she’d feel for him, but he did the one thing he shouldn’t have and that was a mess with her little brother.

“Hold these.” She practically shoved her pompoms in Steve’s hands before heading for Billy.

“Babe,” but the look y/n gave Steve shut him up.

All The kids followed her protesting the entire way trying to get her to change their mind scared of what Billy might do to her regardless of the deal he made with Max. After all, she was just a stranger approaching him in a hostile way, and the gang expected nothing more than for him to react in true Billy. Steve on the other hand, was preparing to possibly receive another busted lip if Billy decided to retaliate and even think about raising his hand to her. He’d go out fighting again if need be. However Y/n wasn’t scared.

Less than a few feet away she bawled her fist, feeling all the anger toward the white boy surface.

“Hey asshole!”

He barely spared them a glance before doing a double take. Once he spotted his sister and her friends a cocky smirk planted itself on his face.

“Well well if it isn’t the losers-“ y/n held up her hand to silence him, her steps coming to a halt.

“You Billy Hargrove?” She pretended to smile flirtatiously.

“Who’s asking princess?” He asked with a cocky smirk, giving her a once over.

“Y/n Sinclair.” And with that Y/n cocked her arm back and punch him squads in face.

“Well, shit.”, Dustin said as the rest of the party gasped.

Wow they didn’t hear a crack or anything, they could see Billy’s now blooded nose, leaking while he grabbed it.

“Fuck! You bitch!” He quickly got in Y/n’s face to where she took a step closer staring up at him.

“I dare you.” Y/n challenged not even flinching as his nostrils flared and fist balled at his side as if he was thinking about retaliating.

“I don’t know who you think you are, but put your hands on my little brother,” she pointed at Lucas. “Again and I promise you’ll have bigger problems when my brother and daddy gets a hold of you and yours.”

“Brother?” Billy repeated sounding surprised.

“Howard Star QB.” She smirked.

Anthony Sinclair was older than Y/n by two years. Currently not present since he was off at Howard University but that could all change with a phone call from her or Erica.

“Are we clear?” She asked crossing her arms.

Billy continued to glare at her as he held his blooded nose, but nodded nonetheless.

“Manners, William. Use your words.”

“Yeah, yeah, now fuck off.”

“Glad we’re on the same page Willy.” She smiled before turning back toward the kids who all continued to stare in shock.

“Are you sure Mrs. Wheeler is picking you up?”

“Yeah-“ they chorused.

“Mom.” Dustin added.

“Good! I’ll see you at home Luke. Bye guys.” She smiled taking her pom poms from Steve and heading to his car.

“Oh. And don’t touch Steve either.” She called over her shoulder. “He’s also mine.”

“Wow,” spoke El and Max in awe

“She’s scary when she’s mad.” Mike commented.

“Yeah.” Steve agreed. “And hot.”

“Very hot.” Dustin added earning a punch in the arm from Lucas and A hit upside the head from Steve

“Come on Harrington.” Y/n beckoned from the passenger seat. “This ice cream isn’t going to pay for itself.”

The teenager grinned to himself goofily as he headed toward his car.

“Yes ma’am!”

#steve harrington #stranger things imagine #billy hargove imagine #billy Hargrove #billy harrington #stranger things #black!reader #Steve Harrington x black!reader #writers on tumblr

[toastedkiwi]

Government Property

Summary: your husband brings something home that he shouldn’t have and needs you to deliver it the person that it does belong to.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Wife!Reader

A/n: based off of The Falcon & The Winter Soldier series up to episode 1 & 2 at the time this was written.

You huffed crossing your arms. You looked at what’s on your kitchen table. It shouldn’t be there. It should be no where near your house in Virginia. Your husband had brought it back from a supposed camping trip that he was taking by himself.

“You really stole the shield?” You asked looking at the bearded blond.

“Yeah,” Steve said. “And I need you to take it to Sam.”

“I’m not UPS or Amazon, Steve,” you said.

“Please,” he said. “I did the hard part and all you gotta do is take it to Sam.”

“Why don’t you do it?” You asked.

“It’ll be different if you do,” he said. “And it’ll mean a lot more. He’ll just tell me to take it back but it’s his shield now, Y/n.”

You grumbled and looked at the shield on the kitchen table. Little cries from another room has Steve stepping away. You continued to stare at the vibranium shield.

“You made sure you looked for trackers?” You called out.

“Of course! I destroyed it,” Steve said.

He came out of the bedroom carrying in a six month old who had just woken up from her nap.

“Fine, fine,” you said. “But if I get arrested for having a piece of stolen government property—.”

“It’s not government property,” Steve argued.

“The government thinks it is!” You exclaimed.

“It was Howard Stark’s before he gave it to me and then Tony had a duplicate made just in case I destroyed the first one. That’s the duplicate and the duplicate belongs to Sam and always will even though he gave it to the Smithsonian,” your husband explained. “That then the government decided to give to some knock off.”

“It’s your bimbo knock off, Steve,” you said. “You saw who they chose.”

Steve frowned and said, “the shield belongs to Sam.”

“What about Bucky?” You asked.

“He doesn’t like shields, Y/n,” Steve informed. “They aren’t his style.”

You rolled your eyes and said, “you’re all a bunch of divas.”

~~~

You came down the dock carrying a big duffel bag over your shoulder. You looked around and spotted someone very familiar. You headed over.

“Mr. Bird Brain,” you said.

They turned their heads.

“What’s in the bag?” Sam asked.

“Something you misplaced,” you said.

Bucky narrowed his eyes and looked at Sam. You pulled the heavy bag off your shoulder. You placed it into Sam’s hands. He feels the vibranium and the shape easily gives it away.

“How?” Sam asked.

You smiled and said, “I have my ways and it’s best if you don’t know.”

“I never expected you to be the one to do such a thing,” Sam said.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about and I hope you can keep it in your hands as he chose you for a reason, Sam,” you said. “You’re a good man.”

You looked at Bucky and he looked at you.

“So, are you, James. Don’t forget that or I’m gonna find you and you’re gonna regret not remembering,” you said placing your hand on his bicep. “And please pick up the fucking phone for once. I don’t care if you speak or not. It’s just nice to know that you’re still alive.”

Bucky hugged you and you happily hugged him back. It’s surprising for him to be hugging you but your words mean a lot to him. It’s all been hard on him. You’re the closest connection he has to Steve besides Sam. Sam annoys him and you don’t. You’re very caring of him like a sister.

“You should come with us and help us,” Sam said.

“I’ve done enough and please wash my prints off of it,” you said stepping away from them.

They watched you walk away and back up the dock.

“What’s in the bag?” Sarah asked coming over to the two.

Sam placed it on the table in front of her and unzipped it. He pulled out the red, white, and blue shield with the star in the center. She gasped.

“We’re gonna be in so much trouble,” Sam said with a smile.

“Obviously,” Bucky said.

#steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x wife!reader #the falcon and the winter solider spoilers #steve rogers x female reader #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers #mcu #marvel imagine #marvel fanfiction