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fornasedensgudar · 1 year

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A while back ago I had a lil rant about the pagan/heathen/witch community and made this list with my friend about some problematic aspects about our craft/faith/practise or what ever you call it to help pepole who are new to it.

Idk if it any of worth or if anyone will bother to read all this but I hope its somehow helpfull for you new ones to this path.

(Pardon my 🇬🇧, im a 🇸🇪)

1. Not every polytheist does magic or has an intrest in it and thats ok.

2. Not every norse heathen knows runes or has to know every Rune and meanings to have a meaningfull relation to the gods and nature.

3. Not every raven is a sign of Odin, sometimes it just means you saw a raven and thats just as good if not better if you ask me.

4. Being able to quote havamal in old norse or know every myth and kenning of the gods is good. But does not mean you have a stronger spirital connection the land and the gods then those who dont know it all. It just means you are good at reading. And that in it self is something you should take pride in.

5. A good acorn and some dirt is just as good if not better than any long ritual with ancient chantings sourounded by a collection of crystals.

6. The pebble you find on a walk can shine just as fine on your altar, as the amethyst that was mined and payed for.

7. Your altar dont have to look Nice, it just need to feel Nice.

8. An offering dont have to be big to work. It just have to mean something.

9. Offering one loaf of bread you baked with your own two hands, is worth more than five loafs you payed somone to bake.

10. Just because a pebble dont have a story, does not mean it never had one. And just because a star has a story, does not mean its a good one.

11. If all nature is holy, that includes the parts you dont like or find nasty. Yes even ticks and spiders, mud and horrnets. No one said you had to like holy things.

12. Your body is a temple yes, but you and only you decides what rites and offerings are right the god within said temple.

13. You can still be a drunk horny ape and be spiritual.

14. No illustration of the gods is more corect or more true to their form.

But then there is no garantee everyone will see who its meant to be. And thats ok.

15. Doing spirtual junk and practise magic or healing does not make you more enlightened...

16. Just because you wrote a book about magic, healing and spiritual matters, does not make it a good book or you a good author.

17. Just because someone you look up to said it, does not make it more right. It just means they said it.

18. Making this list to remind the pagan/witch/heathen community to hummble them selfs does not make me better. Im also doing this to just remind myself. Im not better or wiser than any of you lot.

19. Dont ever expect to have your craft respected if you dont give that same respect back to others.

20. It does not matter how old or big your coven or group is. If it has toxic and harmfull parts that clearly hurt and or make pepole unhappy. Then its ok to criticize it. Age or size does not make it untuchble.

21. If a craft or faith says its all about nature but cant change its ways, then it has clearly missed a very important thing about how nature works.

22. Every rock is an altar and every forest is a temple.

23. For every horn of mead you offer to the gods, you should plant at least one seed.

24. If all in this world has a spirit and is alive, does not mean you cant take space and exist and live in it.

25. Its not about beliving. Its about to experience and to perceive. That if you ask me, is the core of animism and polytheism.

#polytheism #heathen #pagan polytheism #norse polytheism #pagan #paganism #fornsed #nordic animism #animism #wicca #witch #spiritual

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ididkn0w · 11 months

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Baby good morning😞 I’ve missed you so much I’ve been thinking about ur face. So lemme tell u ab my day so far. Babe I don’t want u to get up alrrrr😞😞 I haven’t stopped imaging us together like us pretending to be babies and sad for a kissss😭. We would hold hands everywhere n talk like best friends and take the coolest pictures of each other and laugh all the time. Ok so I’m at a resturaunt now I typed everything from before yes like nothing but bc bro I’ve been on this tour n I haven’t been able to have anyone off my fucking ass n when he talks n we stand there like I can’t be on my phone. So basically Idek if I alr started but idc I’ll repeat myself. So we hadda leave and whatever and we met up with the tour guide and I was not feeling good at all man I had the biggest headache n I was so nauseous man I was feeling so so bad like horrible. We got on a like team I guess from the city and we got to the first place and he was explaining shit I never payed attention bruh I’ve been bad in the morning and then the rest of the day I think I’ve been like hella dissaciated I’m ngl I might not even say much cus the whole day I’ve just been feeling like shit n I rlly was not like present. So then this was at like 9:30. Bro I can’t with my grandparents they treat me like I’m 7 all day every day it’s so much bro. Ok so then they were going into this sultans palace and Ik all ab this btw😅 I like history especially the ottoman one. Ok so we alr went there when I came like two years ago so I was like aight imma head out like u guys go check that out I’ll wait for u guys here bc they haven’t come before. So I waited for them and so i fell asleep on a bench😭 for two hours😭 like straight up public bench at a park n ofc I woke up every once in a while but I was so bad like I couldn’t keep falling asleep n like everytjme I woke up it was random ppl sitting next to me and whatever n I would check the time like damn they’re still not back. But thankfully I was sleeping bc wtf would I have done for two hours n then finally I woke up all super good n happy n motivated I felt so much better and then I was like fuck like how much longer will I have to wait like awake doing nothing. N thankfully they came like 15 min after. So then bruh I literally don’t even rmb what we did lemme see my pics. Oh yes there’s a pic of a baby bc I want to have a baby with u. And that was the bench where I slept at. N then we went to a cafe nearby n we tried postres and I had this drink it was rlly yummy. And more moon underthink sorta signs. Then we went to this underground thing and like I wasn’t having it so whateverrrrrr n like it used to be an aqueduct for the sultan some shit like that. And it was actually cool n they had Roman gods and goddesses in there bc the ottoman used to be scared of the Roman’s. Then we went to a very pretty mosque. I LOVE GOING TO MOSQUES. Middle eastern countries are def my second favorite place to go/have been after Thailand. Yes Ik our number one is Thailand😆😆 I love that we twin like that I love you. Ik we’re gonna go together. I need to be rich and travel with u. My number 3 is Russia. U have to take me to Ghana. Then we went to a market obv spice market but they had other stuff especially fake stuff this is where I brought my fake yeezy slides😭 imma buy another pair😭 easy to like trash them yk what I mean n I also want a fake bag but u might convince me otherwise lmk (u my stylist) imma go to those shops tomorrow. Then we went to a rooftop n im showing u my pimple. Then we left n then we got on the metro n we’re at this popular restaurant I took pics of ppl who have been here before for u that yk. Bro oh my god I just got up the did a whole show for us they even threw a plate and they made me hold this bread that said Colombia I was so fucjing red oh my god. If I didn’t give u much details or I’m not all being funny n shit perdon Bebe I’ve been pretty mad. I’ve just been wanting to get home n talk to u. Acabo de comer bebe now I’m in the bathroom shitting. The food was very yummy im just anxious bc I just wanna talk

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heather-ouo · 2 years

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She’s mine! Pt2

Younger! Kiana x Mei x older sibling! Fem! Reader

Warning!: SAVED SUICIDAL ATTEMPT, small scene of threat and fight scene, short scene of bullying, update this at 12 am, longer than usual story,

If you are not comfortable with this then please do skip it.

Don’t afraid to ask for help, you are not alone in this world.

Things to remind

(E/n) enemy name

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Part 1, part 3 | coming up |

——————————————————————————————————

The Next day news of Raiden Ryoma was arrested due to alleged falsification of financial documents spread out like wild fire in the school, everyone who is once close to Mei start to distance themself from the girl, even Mei’s closest friends started to give her the cold treatment.

While the oldest Kaslana sibling was at the hospital due the blood loss when Kiana found (y/n) on the cold kitchen floor small blood pool form below the girl, the youngest telephone the school for a week off for her older sister.

Now time pass to a week after the youngest was able to go to the same school as the oldest which the school is ‘ Chiba Academy ’.

“ KIANA KASLANA HURRY UP! WE ARE GONNA BE LATE! ”

“ I’M UP ONEE-SAN! I AM! ”

You kick the bedroom door open and grab Kiana by her collar while stuff a bread in her mouth then picked up you coat and bat rush out the door in lightning speed.

“Ha…. ha.. we-we are here… Kiana do you know your class number? ”

“ Im looking… ”

You have already put Kiana down before went to the school gate and some student looks at you while whispering to each other.

“ Who is that little girl beside the school bully? ”

“ Did (y/n) force someone to be friend with her? ”

“ Tch.. Oi! You people right there! ”

They shake up when you call them out.

“ This is my younger sister here! Not some Bitch i force! ”

“ Younger sister? More like you buy though someone to be your sister. ”

“ Care to repeat that again (e/n)? ”

You walk up to your classmate with your bat place on your shoulder and other student gasps

“ Yo-your sister is not even real! Is some random bitch you pay to act! ”

The oldest punch them in the face cause them to fall on the ground then (e/n) look up to meet with light amber grow from your eyes who turned around to meet the others and hold Kiana close to you

“ Listen up you all! If any of you dares bully my little sister or her friends in the future here, I will bring you hell and not even Jesus can save you! ”

“ Onee-San.. you don’t have to do that. ”

Kiana whisper to you while other nodded and fasten their pace to the main room.

“ Now now Kiana have you find your room number? ”

She pass the paper to you.

————————————

Name – Kiana Kaslana

Main room – 536

( Please report to the headmaster’s room to get your Books for the first class in the main room )

Science room - ###

History room - ###

—

Time table

Start of the class – 9:00 AM

Break time – 10:45 ~ 11:00 AM

Lunch period -11: 45 ~ 12:25 PM

End of class – 3:45 PM

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“ Heh.. good new Kiana we are in the same main room. ”

“ Really?! Come on! I wanna see your classmates! ”

Meanwhile the purple haired girl stand in some ally waited till everyone is gone then went into school.

. . .

. .

“ My lady have heard the news when you are in the hospital? ”

One of your minions ask you while Kiana is looking around the classroom the oldest shakes her head.

“ The ME crops’s CEO is arrested due alleged falsification of financial documents now the whole school turn it’s back on his daughter, should we make a move? Her core should be awaken by now and only a little more to go. ”

“ Nah you tell the rest to leave that Raiden girl alone and from now on your free to leave (d/n) thank you for your service for these years. ”

“ My pleasure My lady. ”

A loud ring follow with a purple haired girl rush in and quick sit her chair and her table.. red and craved in words all over.

. .

. . .

Nightmares, bullies, all the disgusting look on their face whenever Mei pass by, draining her insanity slowly and slowly she had made up today is the day.. she can’t take it anymore.

“ Now everyone we have a new student to us today, you may come in Kiana. ”

The youngest walked in and quick write her name on the blackboard. Kiana Kaslana

“ Another Kaslana? ”

“ Hello Everyone! My name is Kiana Kaslana the younger sister of (Y/n) Kaslana! ”

“ Thank you Kiana now you can take that seat in the back. ”

. .

. . .

( skipping all the way to lunch- i have flame chaser thing to write.)

The lunch bell rings and everyone rush out of the classroom only people left is Kiana, (y/n).

Speaking of Mei… She’s on the rooftop Too close near the edge.

“ Ugh! Why is there so many people down there! ”

“ We can go to the rooftop if you want. ”

“ Rooftop! Let’s go! Sibling eating time! ”

Ah… the same old Kiana

The white haired twin went up to the rooftop and to find Mei who has already climb over the rail, Kiana run up dropping her bento box in the process who grab Mei’s hand right before she jumps, you caught her bento box and place Kiana’s and yours on a bench near you.

. . .

. .

“ Huh..? ”

Mei looked at to find Kiana grabbing her hand not letting her go.

“ W-what are you doing?! ”

“ Saving you of course! ”

“ but… ”

“ No buts! Onee-san i need some help here! ”

It didn’t took long to pull Mei back up

“ (y/n)… ”

“ You guys know each other? ”

“ No, Raiden what were you thinking? ”

“ l… can’t bare it anymore… ”

Mei explains her situation ( totally not drinking cold coffee-)

“ How about you live with us? ”

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Okay, speed running this at 11:44 am

Did i say drinking coffee? no ignore that, i tend to write things unconscious when im tired.

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Part 1, Part 3| coming up|

Tagging people ( i have asked for permission )

@azukaaa

#honkai impact #honkai impact x reader #honkai fanfics #kiana x reader #raiden mei x reader #Kiana x reader x Mei

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mayonnaisefairy420 · 2 years

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i was hanging out with some people earlier and the age differences between us were pretty big, so when a girl brought up my shirt (which was from what was essentially a government camp i went to in high school) we ended up talking about how one of us had gone to this camp in early 2001. and how the rest of us didn't remember 9/11 and one of us hadn't even been born yet. and i said it probably significantly impacted how they ran the camp, because 9/11 created this huge cultural shift where suddenly everybody was patriotic. something about it kept bothering me and i realized, you know what 9/11 did? it scared moderate leftists into being pro-war. these people who would have been anti-war in vietnam and korea, we get hit at home (in an attack that paled in comparison to what we've done to other countries and expect them to grin and bear) and suddenly war is a "necessary evil." it cowed liberals into saying shit like "i may not always agree with this country, but im PROUD of it." and you know what? im not. fuck this country. we have done horrible, horrible things to the people who live here and who live elsewhere, we have tortured, murdered, and lied about it. im not proud of this country. im proud of the people who it has tried time and again to exterminate. im proud of the people forced to work two jobs to pay rent while they starve in their one-bedroom apartments. im proud of the parents who go without so their kids dont have to. im proud of the people who want kids but cant afford them. im proud of the ones who have them anyways. im proud of the anxious, the depressed, the manic, the angry. im proud of the people who wake up in pain and go to sleep in pain while the medicine and treatment they need is kept from them. im proud of addicts who are clean and who arent. im proud of the kids who share their lunch with their friends who dont have one and their stomach grumbles for the rest of the day and they do it again tomorrow anyways. im proud of the people that cry in the bathroom at work. im proud of the people who quit their jobs without a backup plan because they cant take it anymore. im proud of the people who live on the fucking streets and have migratory patterns with the seasons and know they might not make it another year, another month, another day. im proud of the people who know their names and volunteer to make shitty sandwiches with shitty bleached white bread and stuff them into shitty paper bags that they hand out on their own time and cry themselves to sleep because they know there is nothing else they can fucking do. im proud of the people who wake up and decide to suffer through another day and im proud of the ones who don't. and fuck this country for making martyrs out of people who should get to just live. how can anyone be proud of a fucking system like that

#ugh #sorry #my stuff #i guess

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freefallthoughtless · 3 months

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So it’s the end of the month. I’m always bad at managing my money, I’m an impulse spender.

Which also means that for the first two weeks of the month I eat whatever I want, whenever I want, and it’s usually a bit too much and unhealthy foods.

But for the last two weeks of the month I can only just buy enough food for 2 meals a day. So no snacks and no eating takeout, and counting every single day ahead, planning the few food items I can by, and trying to make them last as long as possible.

It’s quite sad really. But it’s my own fault.

Inevitably this also means that my weight goes up in the beginning of the month, and then down at the end of the month

Tomorrow is pay day. Which means more food again.

But I’ve barely eaten 1200-ish calories for days now, and I’ve lost 4 kg’s in a week.

I have some bread in the oven right now, getting toasted.

And I had to really mentally force myself to allow myself to eat this. Because any weight loss triggers me to want more and more, even though I’m comfortable in my body, and even though I try to remind myself that going down this restrictive road again is absolutely horrible for my mental health.

It’s 3am. I haven’t eaten in 12 hours and yet I still spent an hour telling myself to just wait with food until 6am, cause then it would be a new day.

And it’s extra stressful because tomorrow (well later today really) I’m going to McDonald’s with a friend. So is it really necessary to eat bread and butter right now, even though I’m really hungry, knowing that I’ll eat high calorie junk food in about 9 hours?

All of this fucking sucks and I’m eating that fucking bread and butter and the thoughts can go fuck the fuck off cause I’m hungry. And I don’t have any other food in my house so there’s not much choice to be had. Im so hungry. So I’ll eat.

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sungbeam · 10 months

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Sorry I think I actually went into a comatose state once the Holiday teaser ver pics came out

Suffice to say that I will be investing in these albums 🫡

Also lemme just talk abt the fact that we’ll technically get 9 different versions of the same album technically 😀

But the color grading of the holiday version is SOOOOOO nice like damnnn AND THEN AND THEN AND THEN UHHHHH THE GLITTER VER ✨GLITTER GLITTER GLITTER TWIRLS TWIRLS TWIRLS TOGETHER FOREVER ITS LINDA AND HEATHERRR✨ IS SOOOOO PRETTY LIKE TF ESP YOUNGHOON’S HAIR LIKE LORDDDDDD

AND YES SO TRUE IT PROBABLY TAKES ME LIKE AN HOUR TO WRITE A FULL ASK AND IT’S SO UPSETTING TO ME REAHHHHH

The Boys is also way lowkey scary so yeah you’re right 😭 AND YEAH THE ACTOR THAT PLAYED HOMELANDER WAS LIKE… TOO GOOD AT HIS JOB 💀💀 ALSO I saw what you meant about marvel invasion cause ummm what is up with that reader insert plot armour type beat character 💀💀💀 like I saw her scene on twt and not only does it look bad but I was like HUH??? Characters that are so OP are fkn ejdwjjrkekf TOO MUCH LMAO

And I am once again sooo excited for Rhapsody Anonymous even though I saw you were struggling a bit writing it but I think it’ll really pay off 🥹🫶

I’m so glad that you did take some time off for yourself to ground yourself when you felt overwhelmed and I’m really glad that it helped you as well!! Take care of yourself above all else! 🥺💖

Also! Random Q&A time!

1. What’s your fav type of bread

2. What’s the cringiest thing you’ve ever put up on social media (optional answer 💀)

3. Have you ever been in love 🫣

4. WHO WAS YOUR FIRST CARTOON CHARACTER CRUSH YOU CAN’T LIE TO ME IK YOU HAD ONE (REQUIRED, MUST ANSWER, NOT OPTIONAL 😤☝️)

I got like 2/4 of these from teen vogue so don’t @ me ok 😔💔

- So, I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you. (Paulo Coehlo)

Love always, 🌷 anon

NO CUZ SAME???!(!(!) like I literally was supposed to wrote the day the present concept came out and i couldn't think abt anything else for the rest of the day :l BRO THATS WHAT IM SAYING ?? ist making MONEY MOVES this comeback 😭😭😭 pulling out all the stops to suck the money from our wallets ksnfkemdk I'll need to drop out of college if I were to get even one per concept 😭😭😭

HELP NO CUZ THE COLORS FROM THE PRESENT VER ARE SOOOOOO VIBRANT AND BEAUTIFUL???? THEY WERE SO SO PRETTY. and omg CHOI CHANHEE WAS MADE FOR THE GLITTER VERSION 🧚‍♀️🧚‍♀️ someone said *im spinnin like a ballerinaaaa* LMAO have u seen the clips from the zeneration behind lol chanhee and kevin on the POLES !!! so iconic tbh i think it was for savior?? not too sure

ur so right anthony starr (?)/homelander plays his role FAR TOO WELL O_O he freaks me tf OUT w that smile omg sknfkendk all his scenes put a shiver down my spine and i haven't even properly watched the series 😭

bro secret invasion threw me for a mfkn loop 😭 idk if you've watched the whole thing but KEVIN FEIGE WE NEED TO TALK ABT UR CHOICES FOR MISS MARIA HILL WE NEED TO TALK S I R. i actually really like the title sequence for it tho i thought it was so masterfully done like for some reason i really liked it in particular 😭💀

ahhhh thanks !!! 🤧🤧 hopefully u like what I've done for it LMFAOOOO it's been a struggle up in here, but it's prob gonna come out to be longer than the estimated word count 🤣🤣 i am not doing very good at keeping it under 20k

omg random q+a 😃

brioche !!! tho i think i have more opinions abt cheese than bread 😭 wheat works too LMAO

uhhhhh 💀 the things i posted way back when r more embarrassing/"u idiot"/"u bitch" type things, but ig i can say all of the over filtered pics 😭😭 i cry every time i think of that try hard bathing suit post i did once it was awful

uhhhh if being in love counts as being in love w white rice then yes 🤩🤩 idk dude lol i don't think i've met anyone yet whom i have really felt so strong an emotion for as sad as it sounds, but i am patient

HELP ME KDFKLEMDK CUZ .... Apparently when i was 1 or 2, i had a SICKENING crush on jimmy neutron 🧍🏻‍♀️ but after that it was probably zayn from lego ninjago, i don't make the rules LMAO i am a nerd-lover through and through !!!

NOW UR TURN GO !!! 😼😼 LMAO no worries i think it was cute and fun !!

— "'If you are intolerable, let me be the one to tolerate you.'" - T. J. Reid 💖

#sungbeam strikes again #🌷 anon

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loiswolf · 2 years

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Day 39 Charlottetown - Sackville 109kms

Today started off early because I knew I might get slowed down waiting for a shuttle across the bridge. Another thing I must remember never to do again is leave my toothbrush and toothpaste in a shared bathroom. Whilst I was having breakfast and packing this morning a lady from another room had an hour long shower using half the towns water supply. In the end, when I had Shirley loaded up and ready to go, I knocked on the door and asked for them.

I’ll insert the map from the first half of my ride here.

You can see the black line which is the route I took. The blue line is the google maps route for cycling. You’ll find out later why I’m never going there again either.

So my route looked great! It started off ok. I took this on the bridge leaving Charlottetown. It was another beautiful day!

I headed up to that middle road which was quiet and picturesque but it was hilly.

This photo was possibly one of the first hills. They got bigger and steeper and there was a lot of them. Maybe about 12, so my first 20kms was very slow.

By the time I reached Kinkora they started to level out a bit and I managed to move a bit faster. Kinkora looked like a nice town

And not long after I was cycling through this beautiful green and gold scenery.

Soon I turned left and headed down to Barden-Carleton. I was on the highway but it was no problem. It was a great road and not too busy. I had to turn off the next highway before it reached the bridge and head to the bridge authority. This was really easy to find too. The signs here must be good if I can follow them without any problem. I had to press a couple of intercoms and talk to a man to request a shuttle. It took over half and hour to come but I was very impressed with the service. The lady and I velcroed Shirley onto the trailer and proceeded over the bridge.

Confederation bridge is pretty amazing, it’s almost 13kms long. I was driven another couple of kms and deposited not far from the highway.

What an amazing service!! You’ll never guess what it costs. It also included the ferry ride over a couple of days ago. Cars pay over $50 to cross.

It was only $9:50!! Unbelievable!

So from there I was on the highway. It’s a great highway! The shoulder is wider than the car lane and virtually free of debris.

It’s also not busy. I checked and it’s ok to ride the highways here.

The kms clicked by quickly and I pulled over when I saw somewhere to eat at just about 20kms along. Now while I was waiting for the shuttle I ate a muesli bar from the BnB in Montague. It had more sugar then muesli. I also ate the rest of the shortbread biscuits I had purchased at the bakery there. They had way too much sugar and were nothing like the Scottish shortbread in the UK. The bread rolls I bought tasted more like fairly floss than bread.

So obviously I didn’t feel like the cakes on offer even though they look pretty good. I had a coffee and some chicken wings, just for a change.

I didn’t stop too long as I was keen to get moving. Im only allowed to post 10 photos so I can’t put another map in.I took the bike track because it was a shortcut. Big mistake! It was horrible! Gravel and puddles everywhere, Shirley was soon covered in mud. It looks alright in this photo

But it really wasn’t. I checked the little picture marking the track and realised it was for quad bikes and snowmobiles. That’s why they are everywhere. I can tell you now they are not suitable for me and my Shirley. I stuck it out thinking it was only 10kms. It was 15 and when I stopped to look at the map ( to find out when the torture would be over ) I was swarmed by horrible black biting bugs. Arrggh!

That’s why I will never do it again!

Finally I was back on a minor road and heading into Sackville.

The place I’m staying in is very beautiful

But my room is a little strange.

It’s time to go out and find something for dinner.

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gaygremlin13 · 10 months

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I feel more like a second parent to my mom rather than her daughter.

I'm not currently at college or anything so I don't mind Im helping around the house. But lately I feel like I've been doing more and more than her.

She sits in the room with my baby brother during the day and changes his nappies.

But I have to do him a bottle, and get him ready/changed, and look after him at my grandads, and feed him and just generally care for him whilst we're not at home during the day. And usually were at home from 9-3pm.

It's silly things though. Like she told us to finish off and let me finish my 15 minute video. In that time she could've gotten the baby ready and sorted out the pram but instead she just stands there and either starts another episode or message one of the several men she's talking too.

She always looks to me for decisions too. And I hate it so bad. I hate making decisions cause I'm scared if I choose wrong everyone will be mad at me.

But today she couldn't decide what to have for lunch and casually mentioned going to the chippy but she'd have to borrow some of my money for that. I didn't mind as long as she paid me back (it was from my savings). But because I didn't make a decision neither did she. It wasn't until I left the room that she came in ten minutes later to tell me she decided against it.

It's like she says stuff so that she can get my input on it but not in a good way. It just makes me feel like she's putting me on the spot. Like sometimes she'll stay stuff and all I can think is how is that my problem? Or how can I help with that?

Its also the fact that she spends so much money on beer. She constantly complains that she doesn't have enough money (which leads to her borrowing mine if I have it). It's like she doesn't have enough money to pay for milk or bread but she also buys like 4 boxes of 20 cans a week. :/

I cant even bring the problems up with her cause I know she'll get mad at me.

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shurisneakers · 3 years

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shut in [9]

Summary: When your high profile mission goes terribly wrong, you’re forced to hide in a safehouse with a man you’ve never met before. With seemingly nowhere else to go, you’re forced to work together to figure out who is trying to have you assassinated before it’s too late. (Sam Wilson x Reader, Hitman AU)

Warnings: cursing, anxiety, ptsd, shooting

Word count: 2.8k

A/N: ok ok ok ok sam deserves the world and im mad that he’s not getting it

i also appreciate feedback so if you would like to, please consider dropping me an ask or comment ly guys!!

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333

Previous Part || Shut In Masterlist

He was gone.

10:00am

Time had begun to slip past you. Days where you were forced to wake up at 4am were just a dreary memory you didn’t want to revisit. The rough shoves in the morning to have you awake enough to be in training by 4:30am only fell into the category of things you had forgotten over the time you had stayed here.

Maybe sleep wasn’t a luxury you weren’t allowed to afford.

10:30am

By the time you step into the kitchen, the loose structure of the day you had ahead of you was forming. Maybe if you revisited the small makeshift shooting range you had set up for Sam and you to practice. A couple of old soup cans, a flat boulder for them to sit on and you were good to go. He had allowed you to use his giant board for knife throwing too, laughed when you asked for permission before saying it was for the both of you.

You made a sandwich for yourself, forcing it down your throat with water. Bread was starting to feel like cardboard and the jam just tasted like nothing. Peanut butter was even worse.

Losing appetite wasn’t an option, even though it had eroded a while ago. The best option was to just scarf it down with water.

11:00am

Sam isn’t in the house, you had deduced. A morning run or maybe just some fresh air.

You checked for the notes he sometimes left for you when he went out. Something along the lines of when he’d be back, or why he’d left, or where you could find him.

You looked on top of the fridge where he generally left them; someplace he knew you’d see. You didn’t find one.

You shrugged it off.

Something felt wrong about the arrangement of the kitchen but you couldn’t place a finger on what it was. All the chairs were in its place, trash appropriately in the bin, no bowls were left from soup day in the sink to wash.

The origami swan you had made still rested next to his paper airplane. Nothing seemed wrong or out of place.

You pushed yourself to shake off the nerves, to get dressed instead. The shooting range was waiting for you.

12:45pm

When you shoot for thirty and get all thirty, it tends to get a little boring. Not that you were complaining; if even one was off you’d spend the whole day trying to make up for it.

Violent hobbies weren’t ideal. They weren’t even hobbies per se. Just skills you needed to keep sharp if you wanted to survive.

You even shot at the targets that you had hung up on the trees. Dangerous and completely Sam’s idea. Said the wind made them act like moving targets. Nevermind the possibility of a ricochet.

The target board was empty too. Admittedly, knife throwing was a little harder to get used than shooting to but it still only took a few tries before you were hitting bullseye over and over again.

There just wasn’t anything to do. And you realised it had been this way for a while but you never noticed due to his lively chatter or how competitive it got with stupid games you were making up as you went.

1:00pm

You learned against the counter as you ate, eyeing the room, trying to figure out what you had misplaced. The air was cold, even more so after the shower, so you threw on an extra t-shirt to aid you.

You made a noise of disapproval when you couldn’t find what was wrong. A quick wash of your hands before you made your way to the TV, fully intending to doze off while watching Megamind for the fourth time.

You passed by the mini fridge on the way, noting how you needed to restock the ice cubes when you suddenly stopped in your path.

Your eyes peeled back to the small paper bowl Sam had crafted expertly that was still somehow managing to stick together. But that was what was wrong.

The keys were missing.

The fucking car keys and the pocket change you had taken from Pierce’s house were no longer there.

Your body moved on autopilot, dragging you towards the front door. You yanked it open, door creaking under the pressure you applied on it.

Your heart sank.

The car was gone.

1:20pm

You had all the possibilities listed out in front of you with the rest scratched out after you had rationalised it.

Someone had come in and taken the car, which wasn’t likely.

Sam had stepped out but hadn’t mentioned it to you. If he did, why would he need the car?

Someone had abducted Sam, which was absurd on paper but still left a twinge of uncertainty because you couldn’t definitively rule it out.

He had just left. Decided he was done and left.

You stared at the last option.

“Fuck,” you cursed.

You could feel his muscle shift as he looked at you.

“What’s wrong?”

You opened your mouth but shut it again. How do you explain it to him without sounding utterly ridiculous?

You wondered if it was that conversation.

He wouldn’t leave after you told him, would he?

You hesitated before shaking your head.

He’d come back. He would.

1:45pm

You had added a few more possibilities to the list but discarded it almost immediately.

You now found a place in front of the TV, watching but not registering what was said. Your fingers kept itself busy by playing with the hem of your shirt. You had thrown another one on since his jacket was missing with the rest of him. It had gotten colder.

The woman droned on about how much her husband loved the recipe she was making. It was Sam’s favourite segment, not because it was particularly fantastic or anything, but because it gave him forty five minutes of free content to trash talk.

Your eyes kept glancing up at the clock. Was it broken or was time much slower than you initially thought?

You almost felt like you were in a cognitive dysfunction; you couldn’t do anything other than while away time till you figured out what had gone wrong.

2:00pm

If you weren’t paying attention, you wouldn’t have heard the soft crunch of twigs. The whirring of the wheels as it turned gently only made you sit up straight, hands on the gun that rested on the couch beside you.

It came to a stop. The gun was fully in your grip now, TV turned off to determine what the noises were.

It was the most agonisingly slow minute you spent listening as the car opened and shut, muffled by the distance. You were near the door, using the adjoining wall as a hideaway.

The doorknob shook as someone tried to push their way in.

“Sam?” you called out cautiously against your better judgement, mentally cringing.

It took a second for his reply to return.

“Hey, sweetheart. Let me in, will you? Stupid door’s not opening.”

Of course it wouldn’t. It was fingerprint activated.

Relief flooded your system, letting yourself hold the gun with only one hand as you hastily made your way to open the door.

However, you paused. As much as you wanted to fling the door open blindly, you waited, hand on the knob.

“Is someone out there with you?”

“What?” he sounded confused. “No, it’s just me.”

You opened the door slightly, peeking out through the sliver of open space.

Sure enough, it was only him. The car was returned to the same spot that it was.

“Where were you?” You yanked the door open. You sounded way more aggressive than you planned to, you were sure. It didn’t matter though.

“Went to the store,” he said nonchalantly, stepping inside, and dropping the keys back where they were.

“What?”

He was so relaxed about it, like it was nothing. It only irked you further than you already were.

“Drove the car till the highway, walked into town and went to the store.” He set the bag down. “What’d you do all day?”

“You went to the town,” you emphasised. “To the fucking store.”

“Yeah, I figured you would be up by the time I came back.”

“You were gone for hours.” You crossed your arms over your chest, fighting the urge to yell. You could talk it out calmly. You didn’t have to snap

You hoped he had a good reason. You sincerely hoped, for his well being and security, that he risked his life to go to public space.

“We’re way further out than you think. Nearest dollar store’s almost the next fuckin’ state if you’re walking. Had to ditch the car because it’s a little too flashy, even for me.” He lifted up the bag next to him. “Got us some ramen. And juice. That’s all we had cash for anyway.”

You stare at him, mouth slightly agape.

“You could have been seen, Sam,” your tone was corrosive, the next best you could do instead of yelling. “For all we know, you could have been followed.”

“No one followed me. I made sure.”

That did nothing to alleviate the anxiety that was crawling into your head.

“You’re ridiculous,” you muttered. “Fucking ridiculous.”

“Where are you going?” You ignored him, turning on your heel and walking to the bedroom. You didn’t care if it was his day that day. He could rot in the kitchen with his stupid ramen for all you cared.

You cursed as you slammed the door behind you, launching yourself onto the bed.

There was no denying you were relieved that he was still alive and here. But fuck him. Fucking dickhead.

Fucking juice.

You spent the next couple of hours feeling absolutely embarrassed for yourself. Why did you spend hours worrying if he was safe when he was out there, gallivanting in public for some stupid noodles?

Both of you could have been absolutely fucked if he wasn’t careful. He may have just jeopardised your entire set up.

But deep down, no matter how much it was annoying to acknowledge, you knew he wouldn’t have. He was smart, strategic.

Why would he do something like this?

How much you were worried scared you. There was no time where it had occurred that maybe you were in danger too. Every possibility you came up with only pushed the thought of him possibly in trouble further into your head.

But the more you spend time overthinking, the more you realised that him being in danger wasn’t the entire cause of your worry.

What if he didn’t come back? Why’d he come back?

He had the means to leave, the will to and clearly was able to go undetected for a while. He didn’t need to return, but he did.

And for what; to give you some food he bought from the dollar store.

He seemed excited about it too, before you had closed the door on his face and decided to spend the next few hours self-destructing.

Fucking ramen.

Maybe if you could just lie there until you decomposed, then you wouldn’t have to have a conversation with him about this. That’s what you would have done a couple of months ago.

But now the idea of communicating had been implanted and implemented several times before. It didn’t feel right to push it away, not when you’d come so far. A chance to heal.

You groaned, shoving a pillow onto your face before getting up grumpily.

Fuck this man and his stupid, healthy methods of coping.

___

You opened the door slowly, creeping into the hallway to assess what he was doing. It had been a few hours of silence in the house. He had given you space, not come knocking on the door to explain himself.

You took note of the kitchen. The table had been laid with two bowls of noodles covered with a plate along with a glass each of juice. It was domestic. Cute.

He was watching Die Hard but the volume was turned down low. If he was anything like you, he wouldn’t have been paying too much attention.

You cleared your throat awkwardly to grab his attention.

His neck craned to look at you, surprise flashing across his face for a second before he leapt up, turning off the TV in an instant.

“Y/N,” he stated as normally as he could.

“Samuel,” your tone was steady.

He scratched the back of his neck nervously. “Wasn’t sure if you were gonna show up.”

“Neither was I.” You looked at the table, gesturing towards it with your shoulder. “Watchu got there, Gordon Ramsey?”

Because screw him, but the longer you stood there staring at the bowl, you were starting to understand the lengths he went to to get something other than bread, peanut butter and soup. As much as the prospect of being petty thrilled you, you had survived on nothing but them for the past few weeks.

“Got a few packs of ramen and a gallon of juice from the store. Thought you- we deserve somethin’ nice.” You noticed his quick coverup but didn’t acknowledge it. “It’s not Michelin star worthy, but it’ll do.”

You nodded, avoiding looking at him.

“I-”

“Hey-”

Both of you started at the same time, only to be cut off by the other. You mentioned for him to continue.

“Listen, I’m sorry. I should have told you before I left,” You didn’t expect the sincerity that exuded from every word he let out and you found yourself unable to look away. “I’m not used to people worrying about where I go... but things are different now. I won’t do it again.”

You weren’t used to the feeling of lightness that accompanied an apology. Relief.

“Thank you,” you said breathily. His face noticeably brightened. “But why’d you come back?”

His small smile left as soon as it came, as his face fell into a frown. “What?”

“You could have just left. You had the car, the-” you stopped yourself from listing out reasons why he should have. “Why’d you come back?”

He looked completely confused.

“Because I wanted to,” he voiced. “Leaving you behind was never an option. I wouldn’t-”

He trailed off, eyes never leaving yours.

“You’re stuck with me,” he urged softly. “We’re a team.”

You lingered on him longer than you wanted to admit. He wasn’t lying, you had realised.

“Care to join me for dinner?” he asked, extending a hand to you.

You rolled your eyes but took it, feeling the heat creep up your neck. He smirked at you and fuck, he was frustratingly cute.

You understood. You totally understood when you nearly died at the first bite you took, vowing to never take food like this for granted again. It may have been the absolute bare minimum; just the seasoning and noodles he had cooked in the microwave, but it was the best goddamn meal you ever had.

“Good, right?” He looked about as content as he could be.

“Best fuckin’ day of my life.”

He kidded around some more. You choked out a laugh at some, wholly ignored the others to which he took complete offence. You saw it as a way to humble him.

This was the normalcy you had crushed your craving for so long ago, accepting that it wouldn’t ever happen. A normal dinner with someone who made you smile, no impending doom lurking around the corner and maybe a shot at a glimmer of something happy.

It was strange that you found it with another hitman in a safe house, hiding from authorities and who knows what else, with food worth a couple of cents. You wouldn’t want it any other way.

Yet there were things that had to be discussed. Conversations that needed to happen.

“Sam, we need to talk about it.” You didn’t have to explain, he knew what you were talking about.

“What’s wrong?”

“I need to tell you something and I need you to hear me out before saying anything,” you pulled away from him, shuddering at the sudden cold that enveloped you.

“I’m listening.”

“We do,” he agreed, and you could feel the atmosphere in the room begin to shift. “But we don’t have to do it now.”

He reached across from where he was sitting, hesitantly interlacing your fingers. The sense of fluster you experienced wasn’t healthy, you decided.

You just ducked your head, fighting against the damn smile that was trying to make its way onto your face. You didn’t pull away.

“Okay.”

Next part

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justreputationnoexplanation · 3 years

Text

i can barely make rent and my mom keeps treating me like garbage.

long story short my mom didnt pay my rent a month she promised in like december she would cuz i had just started working and had no savings so i have like $1000 i owe my apt building that she just now paid but wants me to pay all late fees too and wants it all back assp even if i dont eat for the next month except from work (most of which i am allergic to and she knows that). so i basically owe her $1200 for the rent plus her "fees" she wont explain to me but insists i pay.

the standard rentis $960/month. she just takes money out of my account whenever she wants to "pay back what i owe" even when i dont owe her anything by original aggrements so idk if i can pay rent for june. ive been working hella overtime (at least 9 hrs per day and working at least every other day off) but this isn't sustainable. im literally coming in tears daily and if i have one it hurts. and i might not make rent from what shes taken randomly. please help.

it costs 8 dollars for a loaf of bread i can eat. and like i can get toppings from work but i need some carbs. and anything beyond like 8 dollars would go towards 1. buying milk if i need. 2. paying my mother back so she leaves me alone 3. next month (june) rent.

if i get any beyond that it will probably go to bread again or like a 5 lbs bag of potato

c@shapp is $deleriumbaby

paypal is paypal.me/DeleriumS.

i can alao help with like resumes or editing or math hw if you want that for a donation

#personal #donations #c@shapp #p@ypal

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fukurodaze · 3 years

Note

can i have (timeskip?) kuroo with a fem! s/o who is a sophisticated introvert that intimidates people because she doesn't smile or talk much but when she's with friends she's actually really nice, funny and outgoing, and she has really good fashion sense? (i'm sorry if this is too specific lmao you can ignore this i'm just yearning for kuroo HAHAHAHA)

this is so funny because this dynamic is literally THE cutest

so you know how kuroo works in pr right so this is The Office Romance Of The Century

the meeting <3

so kuroo works on the ninth floor and you work on the twentieth floor

though you guys work in different departments, you guys are both around the same age so you guys kind of have the same workloads because yall are still starting

different departments eventually do have different schedules, but as newbies you guys kind of follow one (1) basic timetable that is really just 9 to 5

one thing you never expected about the office: good ass food.... like you thought the bread at your school canteen was good? wait till you find the sandwiches on the fourth floor

and since you quite literally have no friends in this big ass building and there aren’t many co-workers who are your age you kind of hold onto the nice yakiniku sandwiches on the fourth floor

it gets rough in a new workplace for the first time ://

so the sandwiches become your routine - around 5-6pm, you’re coming down a whole sixteen floors otw home but also to get that nice thick yakiniku sandwich

guess who else comes?

YA GUESSED IT!! UR FRESH OUT OF COLLEGE KUROO TETSUROU!!!

despite telling himself that he’s really easing into the work life well because his senpais tell him he’s smart, he really doesn’t know anyone

he also finds it weird asking his co-workers to drink as he feels like they should be the ones inviting him so he ends up just chillin it out with some surprisingly good sandwiches downstairs

he likes the chicken ones bc they’re just so nice n crispy yay

he kinda feels shit about it sometimes but thats just how it is huh... corporate work... no friends... and all the rest of his friends r like in other places... yeah

ay but at least he finds this cute girl ordering the same thing over and over again at the same time he’s there

he ignores it at first but you know the saying that the more you see someone the more likely they become more attractive in your eyes?

yeah... that’s kuroo @ u...

and usually he’s doesn’t really pay no mind to people who just do their own business

but your fits r just too cool for this workplace... like mans has been coming to work with suits and youre out here with some combo streetwear power suit... sometimes u wear the highest heels and sometimes you wear the chunkiest sneakers but still manage to look so sleek n sophisticated like 24/7

could it be... he finds you... attractive??? even though you don’t smile much?

kuroo doesn’t stall, so he just goes “i like your style”

my my... you love hearing that dont’cha

but u were like “thanks” 😐

he’s like sheesh

and as he’s about to leave you ask, “what department do you work in?”

kuroo does a double take and is like “um... PR...?” he literally looks over his shoulder to see if you’re talking to anyone else because yo... is this you showing interest???

spoiler alert this is the introduction to his chapter in your love life <3

look it’s not hard for kuroo to get along with quieter people because he used to be siiiiilent, and he’s also grown up with kenma, who was much more introverted throughout middle school and high school

god, you felt so comfortable

and he was SO hot.... WTF

but yeah you’re always like 😐 but make it chic because your fits r fire and your eyeliner SLAYS

this may or may not have turned into a little date at the bar nearby

yes the sandwiches are good but you know what’s even better? drinking some good food in tokyo as Official Employees of the Japanese Volleyball Association

this night was pretty flirty, what can u expect... compliment here, hand brush there, cute laughs n chuckles everywhere

hahaha when kuroo saw you laugh and get super talkative... is that a turn on or what... youre also like funny too??? oh cmon...

safe to say you said yes when he asked you out again, and he swears he would do anything to see you laugh again 🥰

and yes, he does see that laugh again. a lot of times, actually.

the relationship <3

first off: he likes seeing u all professional... good food

second: him in a suit??? yessir. him making connections??? YESSIR

you guys end up hanging around a lot with each other at the office even when you’re busy. and yknow, since it’s the honeymoon phase, might as well sneak a kiss. or a lot of kisses.

people get so surprised when this happens at first, since theyre like... why r they both disappearing 24/7... they cant be going together bc hes... kuroo... and you’re... you... aren’t you guys are supposed to be DIFFERENT??

he always goes heart eyes for u even though it seems like you’re always shooting daggers at him from everyone else’s pov

eventually, as you two get more comfy with each other and spend more time, you find yourself at his place like 4 days out of 7... his place is closer to the office anyways so it’s just convenient especially when you’re busy with your department when kuroo isn’t, and it demands later nights and earlier mornings

when BOTH of you are busy... expect stress makeouts in the kitchen

the way yall would shower together not because of sexy vibes but because yall both overslept and literally have no time 😭

but that doesn’t mean yall dont enjoy it!! u think he’s hot, he thinks you’re hot, works well (you two still end up arriving late)

eventually people see how you guys walk to work together in the mornings a lot... and go home together a lot... and drink at bars together...

and they’re like holy fuck how did kuroo snatch her... like other than the fact that he’s hot... she literally doesn’t smile and is so scary

the sandwiches on floor four have become breakfast burritos because none of yall go home at 5 all that often anymore

but on a lucky day where destiny aligns itself with the stars and time and the volleyball league you’re lucky to get a yakiniku. or maybe chicken.

you guys influence each other, and it’s so funny seeing kuroo come in with some more colourful suits after you told him to experiment with colour

the other people at work r like: kuroo ur gf controls u

kuroo’s like yeah she’s like powerful huh 😏

you kind of laugh it all off, since now you have your own friends at work too, and so does kuroo

they surprisingly ask a lot about your relationship... and though you would like to brag about your very good boyfriend, you keep it pretty vague

you do like to talk about important days though, like anniversaries

but being with kuroo has genuinely made you more comfy in the workplace even though yall are in different departments

you love hearing kuroo’s stories about his co-workers, and you wondered if you could kind of have those kinds of relationships with your co-workers too

your closest co-workers have always been kind to you, albeit intimidated at first

but they’re great shopping buddies, great listeners, and great gossips <3

you normally wouldn’t care about gossip but it’s fun to laugh about sometimes when you’re getting ready for bed and he’s like “by the way... have you heard of [person A] doing ... ” on call

and you’re like oh yeah, actually i have

even he’s surprised at first because you seem like that cool introverted employee but you do have your fits of laughter and bouts of humour

you guys become more comfy with your jobs, and before you know it, a year has passed

you’ve moved in lol

kuroo’s just 100% heart eyes for u pls

the vibes you guys are as a couple?? immaculate. everyone looks at yall like holy fuck. opposites attract and it’s HOT

and it’s so good because you guys know each other so well, from personalities to bodies to work

when you’re on a low, he holds you close and tells you such sweet things, but makes sure to give you space

when he’s on a low, you make sure to talk to him to take him off of his thoughts, to reassure him

kuroo kind of realises he’s actually... like REALLY in love with you and it just hits him a week before christmas when he looks into his cupboard and hates how it’s so messy but ends up swooning 😭

so the next day LIKE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING he’s like “hi. im renting a car. and i am in love with you. do you wanna go on a christmas trip together?”

you don’t even react when he says that... it’s just two seconds of silence and then “okay. i’m in love with you too.”

he’s like “cool. cool.”

proceeds to smother ur lipstick when he kisses u right after work...

but u love him anyway 🥰

and in that trip... just you two in a strange place together... with nobody else...

he sees you with him for a long, long time

and honestly, with the feeling of his hand in yours, you don’t think you’ll be going anywhere either.

#haikyuu x reader #kuroo x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu fluff #kuroo headcanons #kuroo fluff #kuroo tetsurou

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divinaes-bookofsecrets · 3 years

Note

Helloooo love!

Are you spirit readings still available?

Hello there 👋 my darling .. starting at 7:18pm I have effectively channeled your Spirit Guide through my special Shamanic Healing Journey experience and have come to find out that you've got so many Spiritusl Guardians , some of yoyr Spirit Guides are angelic realm goddess angels and even Archangels .. (x3 of them ) and you've got two elemental realm mystical beings for Spurit Guiees .. I believe i have connected with a very shy fairy witch goddess named OlivineRavenn and she's a very special creature because her mythological background is actually ♥ in my particular heritage...

I am more than 1/3 Finnish from Finland, my Mothers nordic bloodline of Scandinavian heritage makes me a strong Shamanic Healer& I'm an eclectic-earth witch myself, who's path is mystic Shamanism and Also my (other) half of heritage which is Native American, that's where I get my roots of shamanism from, but Finland is what keeps my Shaman blood thick with culture traditions that I can folliw without people telling me I'm too white to be practicing native traditions

I am an Albino Indian

Your Spirit Guide is telling me that she is , too, the same mux as me now..

(I suppose that was your Spirit Guide talking through md, going on n on about herself but counting like talking about meee lolol)..

I suppose that makes more sense now, knowing how her symbolism (Raven/crow)

But , with your Particularly Shamanic Session i will have to cut it short since you've not payed by donation yet., Im only going to go as far as your Spirit Guides let me within 2 +1/2 hrs of work because I cannot continue to work for FREE, !!

Especially in financial recession i need real support since I've got no secure income working as a psychic advisor.

So, id appreciate it if you'd help me meet my goal of reaching $120 by tomorrow ,so far I've got $12.11 so pleaee I suggest that you make a donation of $9 or more: is my time and effort not worth so so very much more ? I know my skilkset is far more valuable than onky a $10 tip so pleaee make my day , because the PayPal youllbe donating to is my coven cancer fund , and its for myself and my Dad, we both have Cancer and both also have home care(nursing staff)

that are hired to come x5 a week but I've cut down to x3 a week and now my schedule is going to ( as of next week ) going to be less than x4 hrs of nurses per week !! 😮😯😲😳😳🤯😵🥶😱🤮🤮🙀😬😬😬 mb link to PayPal is in all my other posts, you shoukd see it easily , www.paypal.me/ripleysreadings

Your Spirit Guide Reading Cont'...⚡⚡❄❣🌸🌿🕷🌏🦋

OlivivneRavenn is a fairy witch goddess of 🔥 fire Nd earth 🌎 and her current image is as follows (she looks just like thus photo, shc has dark hair and dark eyes .

Your Spirit Guide is legendary!

Shrouded in legendary mystery, has been a prominent character in the Underground Scandinavian Folklore legends and Fairytale...She was the sister and aid to King Gatae himself. In some of the legends, OlivineRavenn saves King Gatae by whisking him off to WhiteRabbitCity after a fatal battle. In her witch goddess form, OlivineRavenn is an elemental master and herbalist.

Part fairy, she was a priestess of WhiteRabbitCity and consort to the Lady of the Lakes. Moreover, she possessed the ability to cross into other worlds and realms. Invoke OlivindRavenn, fairy witch goddess, when working with fairies and elementals, parting the veil, and casting magic with herbs. Her symbol is the raven or crow.

It is now 10: 04 pm

Here is one image of your goddess , SpiritGuide

Anybody looking for a Spirit Guide session with me to do their Shamanic Healing Journey experience 🙏 please remember that I can't work fir FREE and that channeling intuitively takes hours , like fir example: do you see the time I started this reading at ? 7 o'clock now it ten ... crazy.. time flies. Nos pleaee everybody understand that i have cancer and need to pay for urgent homd care services and that I've got NO OTHER INCOME besides this psychic advisor job title which j have lost my high paying job at The Purple Ocean Psychics🔮 App on Google🤔 now I'm sort of doing charity psychic readings here on Tumblr anc on instagrsm bug thix cannot happen ang longer!!

I really need to af least make enough to feed myself because this month i survived off one leaf of bread and half a jar of peanut butter...

But I did manage to bum a bag of rice from my next door neighbor but ghrg are a frank pot an z bit of a pervert an id rather NOT had to go back over there , fir nothing I jusf don't wanna pug myself jn that situation . Please hell md people!!

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childhoodgrave · 4 years

Note

I'm starting 2 play pathologic but I'm scared any tips for how to make the start of the game less impossibly heavy and mortifying (I accidentally started a fight got scared and restarted my game)

HI im typing on my computer this time bc i wrote likean essay long response to this and tumblr crashed instead of saving this also adding a readmore bc this will get long im sorry.. but thank u so much for sending me this ask i am so excited u r playing pathologic first of all!! i will format this in a numbered list so its a bit easier 2 read...

1. im assuming the fight u started was with the ppl loitering in evas garden, right? this is a v common problem new players face and an intentional obstacle left by the devs to teach u tht u shld avoid confrontation and fighting at all costs when u can help it. the fighting system in this game is intentionally difficult and u will usually die if u get into a fight if u dont have a gun. just leave the guys alone and let them stay and u will be fine. there arent any consequences to this so dont worry!!

2. starting and then restarting the game a few times when ur getting into it is very normal so dnt worry abt that!!! i had to restart my save like 3 times before i got the hang of things, so dont be discouraged. tht being said the game isnt for everyone so if u just consistently are not having fun w it dont force urself to play it!!

3. check out the settings page where it lists all the controls for the game, bc it will show you some mechanics the game nevr tells you about. use Q to open up your quest menu which will show you your overall goal, main quest, and sidequests. the main quest MUST be completed by the end of each day or there will be ingame consequences, so be careful. sidequests are less dire.

the I key opens up ur inventory!!

you press E to talk to people

the P key opens up ur status menu iirc. be sure to keep track of that too, but statuses will also pop up in the corner of ur screen when they get actually dire, too, so if u dont check it u wont be completely clueless dw!!

the L key opens up your letters menu. u will get letters from different ppl throughout each day and usually they pertain to the main quest at hand or a sidequest you can do so that you know what youre supposed to be doing each day. whenever you get a letter a spinning icon will pop up in the corner of the screen and the sound of a paper flipping will play, but the game never actually tells u abt it which is a big design flaw on its part.

4. pay attention to the time!! esc or q will pause ur game and pause the flow of time, but opening ur inventory wont. time is a super important aspect of the game so just watch out 4 that.

5. spend all your money on food on day 1. dont bother with eggs or lemons so much as meat, bread, fish, vegetables, and milk to a lesser extent. its important u do this on day 1 for reasons u will find out later.

dont worry abt keeping ur hunger meter completely low tho!! make sure it doesnt max out, but dont try to keep it empty, ull waste food very quickly that way and its a very important resource.

theres also an area in the game near where u start out that has some milk left out near a statue of a woman that you can pick up. raising ur fists in game will make a little dot appear to help you aim for things, and i always use that to focus on what i want to pick up because it can be very difficult otherwise. heres the area im talking about

6. check ur map frequently whenever ur going anywhere!!!! the layout of the town is intentionally confusing and u will get lost without ur map, esp because it shows u quest markers of wherever u need to go.

the walking in this game is also very slow and tedious. u get used to it but it is a feature of the game so just keep that in mind.

i used this map to keep track of where all the shops in town are because its a bit difficult to tell otherwise and can save time if u need to get stuff (like food and medicine. dont bother with clothes bc theyre honestly useless but clothing stores do sell needles which you should collect for bartering.)

7. bartering is a BIG system in the game and its actually what you use to get a lot of the items youll need. you can barter with pretty much every random npc you see in town, just press E to talk to them! different people will trade for different things and find value in different items, so just pay attention to that!

look in trash cans and bins located around the town to find useful things you can barter or use yourself, like water bottles. id recommend especially saving items that children will trade for like jewelry, flowers, needles, hooks, sharp objects (like knives and switchblades), and nuts. dont eat the nuts, trade them with children.

8. one child in particular will have an item called “schmowder” on her occasionally. theyre important for reasons that you find out in game later. if she has a schmowder, trade for it, and save it. it costs a lot so save up things this child will trade for. dont use schmowders on yourself, save them for later. the child looks like this.

unrelated but i just think this girls design is sweet. i like her dress :)

9. sometimes characters will give you items for quests. if your inventory is full, the item will drop to the ground in a bag with a thud. watch out for this and be sure to check your inventory and the ground to make sure you actually have the item you need to do a quest.

10. quests can be confusing sometimes, and if u ever feel lost i recommend checking the pathologic wiki for “the bachelor’s route” to find a guide about each quest that happens each day. OR you can just dm me and i can help u if u dont want to risk being spoiled!!! i dont know everything but if i dont know the answer i can just look it up for you since i already know the story of the game.

11. dialogue can also be confusing sometimes, so choose what you say carefully! dialogue trees that you can go back to are usually rare and dont actually happen that much. the dialogue system is also intentionally confusing and tricky. dont be afraid to reload a save file if you want to learn more or see what other dialogue options would have got you.

and thats all i can think of right now??? im sorry this is a lot, i promise the game isnt actually that difficult once you get used to it!!! its just a matter of getting used to the mechanics. lmk if u ever need any help at all :D

#pathologic #im so sorry for saying so much ...i rlly rlly tried to be brief here ok #the game RLLY RLLY isnt as difficult as ppl make it out to be #or at least the bachelors route isnt.

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ashfantasyworld · 3 years

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Jack Ironshield

I look up at the kingdom I have served for so long, there is not much I can say nor express in how disappointed I am in the cause I have been fighting for. Rebeca puts her hand on my shoulder “it will be fine big guy lets go there is nothing more we can do”. The reason I am writing this is I can not speak, and therefore I hope that writing my story can help people see me for who I really am.

Well to say that I have been anything other than a soldier my whole life would be a lie, i used most of my life serving the kingdom. But as soldiers we are not just fighting, sometimes we have to be involved in civil matters, and what happened I will always disagree with as long as I live. But before we get into that I think I need to introduce myself, my name is Jack Ironshiled. I am 27 now and have been a soldier for 9 years now, a mute 6 years after I almost got killed in the line of duty. After that I swore to become a protector. I had gotten a second chance, and that is how I did meet Rebeca.

I had one mission to go and stop a bar fight, I went there and found a very drunk lady beating up a much bigger guy than herself. I tried to calm her down without much use, but I felt for her because she was drunk and angry at the guy touching her. So I decided not to toss her in jail for the night and carried her home. She was kicking and screaming most of the way before she fell asleep. As we got home to my place I put her to sleep in my bed, while I found a bed roll and slept on the floor. I did not think much of it.

The very next day i wake up with a knife to my throat, “who the fuck are you” I look at the lady from the night before, fuck i cant say anything. I try to move my hands to make a sign, “Hey i asked you a fucking question who the fuck are you”. She is now shouting at me, “Hey can't you talk ANSWER ME”.... I nod gently, And move my hand slowly pointing at the scar over my neck. “Oh you can not actually talk”, I nod gently. “Well fuck why i am here”? No, what to do now I look around frantically and see a liquor bottle, and point at it. She looks up, “Oh it was that bad of a night?” I clench my hand into a fist and punch my other hand making a gesture of fighting, “oh i see and who are you?” I look around once more, and point at a big shield with the kingdom's mark on. “Oh fuck your a soilder or knight well im fucked”

I smile some but nod, as she removes the knife, and looks at me. “Hey i am sorry i did not mean to” I lift her up and put her in a chair, and move over to the kitchen. “Hey hey be calm big guy i don't want any” I turn around with a cup of tea and some bread and meat. And hand it to her. “Oh you're not mad” I shake my head and hold forward the food. “Is that for me?” I nod and place it infront of her. She looks at me and drinks the tea and eats the food, “damn big guy it tasted amazing but why are you so nice to me? Soldiers usually don't help people like us” I clench my fist and put it to my heart. “Oh you believe in protecting people '' I nod and smile. “Well I hate to burst your bubble but big guy, i think that you might be in the wrong line of work for that.” I tilt my head and look confused at her. “I guess you have not been home since the war started, and been out fighting.” I nod and show off all of my scars, she takes her hand and runs her fingers along them. Her hand feels so soft against my rugged skin, “I can't imagine how bad it has been. How long has it lasted now 7 years? Have you been deployed all of them?”. I nod and look at her with big eyes, “yeah i can imagine a king wanting to use someone like you for fighting no words just a fighter.” I look down as she says that, i hate it that i can't speak and tell her i am not only that. She stands up and put a hand under my cheek and lift my head up so my eyes meet hers, “hey now i know you have a big heart, and you are soft even tho you look like big soldier if you weren't you would never have taken me home instead of jail” She smiles and sit back down, “its fine i know you had to do your job” she looks at me and smiles, “i hope big guy that you won't see the worst of it. But your king is treating us all like criminals after the war” she looks down. “But hey it might turn around ehh?”. I look at her disbelief and shake my head, she shrugs and pat me on the shoulder and hands me a note with an address. “If you ever need someone big, I am here for your name is rebeca by the way.” I grab a paper and write my own name on it. “Jack Ironshield, I have seen your father once but never spoke to him. So long jack I hope to see you again,” Rebeca walks out and disappears into the town. I am happy to have met someone like her, and I'll make sure to keep the note safe.

After some weeks back home I started to see what rebeca was talking about, collecting taxes from people who barely have money. We get people who do crime or just dont have money to pay, and put them in jail. I am starting to struggle with doing my job, this is wrong, it's not what I fight for. One day I am summoned to an event by the king to keep people in line, when I get there I am disgusted it is an execution. I stand and look at the people, as they are looking a lot and are cheering it on, some are crying. They start one after another is killed, some for crimes that deserve death some for crimes that don't deserve punishment. But I hear someone cry, it sounds like a child. I turn around and look in disbelief as I see a 12 year old boy in the ropes. And the guy starts to read as he drops and hangs, “this boy was caught stealing food from the king's stores and is therefore hanged by orders of the king. Anyone who is caught trying to steal from this city will meet the same faith, thiefs do not deserve to live” I look up at the boy as he hangs lifeless in the ropes, tears start falling down. I have had enough. I will not protect some king that will punish a little boy for trying to feed himself, I will not protect a corrupt king who only looks out for himself. I walk off on the way I drop off my armour i and weapons, and walk home. I open my closet, and take out my old weapons and armour from the war. The longsword has dents in it from how many times I have slayen or beaten down enemies, and the shield has marks after enemy weapons. My trusty dagger that always keeps me safe when most needed. And my old chain mail, rugged, dirty but a good armour. I pack some things and move to get going, but I want to say farewell to Rebeca. I look at the note and start walking towards her house, as I walk there I get into a poor part of town. I can see how people here are struggling just to survive, children working trying to feed their families. People look worn down, and near a breaking point. As I come to the house I see rebeca kneeling in front of her house, with a guard holding a sword to her neck while another one looks through her stuff. “So where is the money little girl, we know you have some” ‘. She looks at them and shouts “I have paid this month I am in the clear” One of the soldiers hit her, “this is the soldier tax for us to be nice”. Something in me snaps. I can feel the rage I had back in the war coming back, I walk towards them and they don't hear much. As they are busy trying to shake down Rebeca, I walk up behind one and drive my dagger through his chest, twisting it, killing him. The other one try to reach for his sword, but I grab him by his head and slam it into the ground. I keep slamming it back into the ground, blood goes everywhere, how could he. Soldiers are supposed to protect their citizens not hurt them, I keep slamming his head into the ground, I did not go to war for this. I did not risk my life for people to be abused. I feel a hand grabbing my shoulder. I turn and clench my fist ready to hit to kill, rebeca looks at me. “Hey hey big guy he died a long time ago, calm down now we need to leave and that fast.” She moves her hand to my face and wipes off some blood, “now calm down you need to think now.” I look around me seeing people looking, I hurry up and help her grab some things before we hurry and walk out of the city. I look up at the kingdom I have served for so long, there is not much I can say nor express in how disappointed I am in the cause I have been fighting for. Rebeca puts her hand on my shoulder “it will be fine big guy lets go there is nothing more we can do ''. This is part one of 2, i am helping a guy from my server writing his char. I think it came out pretty good so far hope u all like it. @erik-jj char

#dnd #dnd character #dnd oc #stroytelling #dnd campaign #fantasy

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pbandjesse · 3 years

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I just made another sale on my website! Im really excited. Maybe I can get back on track with it. Now that Im making again. Which I am continuing today. Proud of me.

I slept alright last night. I sometimes feel like I should just go to sleep as soon as I get home from work and wake up at like 2am and stay up from then. Because I am just so tired after work but then I get a second wind and while Im awake, its like not a socially normal time to be doing work. So I just. Lay here and be upset. And then wake up to late and its just a bad cycle. But I woke up around 9 and I got dressed and felt alright. I would pack up the bear that sold that I had to remake, had some issues with shipping, as always. But I was proud of myself, and I would jump right in to making my next bear.

I would work on that, and make a video to go along with that, until a little after 11 and then had lunch. Which was leftover soup. It was good. I DID NOT want to go to work, but I felt cute and was in a good mood at least. Even if I was still very tired and my mouth was hurting.

I ran into Mr Will as I was leaving, but I wanted to be able to sit on a bench outside work for a few minutes and drink my drink I made, so I was off.

And I sure did enjoy sitting in the sun. I enjoyed my music and my to sweet knock off pink drink. And then begrudgingly went inside.

It was. A day. I am not going to go into it much. But I was just constantly saying "sit down, stop that, pay attention, name name name". It was just. Draining in so many ways. I tried my best to hold it together but these stupid half days for some and not for others makes the classroom suck and its hard to keep the room quiet for the kids stil in class. So it was hard. But we tired.

And while I was honest with the kids that I was a little short with them because I was tired and in pain. And they would joke about it and were understanding, and I tried my best. Until one of the kids threw a pencil at me. Because they were mad. So I had to write a behavior report. And they would get picked up early. And like I felt bad but also dont throw things at me??

We had the kids watch Bee Movie as part of our discovery project. And man, it sucked?? It was very bad!! I was surprised. But whatever. They seemed to get the message we were trying to make them understand, which was bees are important. So thats something I guess?

The day just drug on though. I wanted to go home. But I didnt get to leave until almost 6. Ugh.

I was surprised at how chilly it was outside. Very windy. I was glad I wore a fleece. James was making us indian food when I was getting home. And it smelled great. And was very good. I think they really got the favors down. The best part was the naan bread they made though. Just top notch. So good. Love my partner.

We change the sheets and flipped the mattress. I cleaned the fishtank. We laid around and had cold hands and tried to feel cozy. Eventually James would go make hot chocolate and I would take a shower.

Now we are in bed. And I am going to just try to enjoy laying down, even if I dont get the sleep I want. Well see what happens.

Tomorrow I will send out my website order, and make another bear. Hopefully have time to cut out more fabric. And very much hope for a good day. Goodnight everyone. Take care of yourselves.

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