#and don’t feel good still

[againstthegrainphoto]

….to say I’m bummed today is quite an understatement….

….my mom would be in town right now….we would be going to my sisters house to hang out and get lunch….then we would be headed to see our long planned family outing and what would have been my mom’s first kraken game that she’s been looking forward to since literally last season….

Instead I’m still recovering from Covid.

😭😭😭

#excuse my pity party #I’m v down right now #and don’t feel good still #has been the worst week #I’m not crying your crying #I missed squid practice #I missed family time #I miss my mom #my sister was kind enough to drop off my meds to my door #this whole week has been one big pile of shit #I’ve missed a week of work #I missed a vaccine clinic I was suposta work #I missed a whole week of my life #I still haven’t finished the Wednesday 13 photos #at least I’m the person who waits and waits and waits to buy tickets when they’re cheapest so we didn’t lose any money #also I literally had the newest vaccine a month ago I should have been in peak immunity #fuck this shit

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[biceratops7]

Here's a neat detail:

Not to talk about season 1 Good Omens in the year of our Lord and Season 3 announcement 2023, but I kind of just realized another little moment that's very sweet and true to real life.

I really like that Crowley isn't just fine again after he learns Aziraphale survived the bookshop burning after all. Normally in stories when there's a "surprise, I'm alive!" moment, the characters just kind of celebrate for a minute and then move on business as usual. But Crowley doesn't. He continues to be visibly be shaken and a little unfocused throughout his conversation with Aziraphale, and when he has to explain what happened, he starts crying again.

I don't know I just thought that was a really nice detail because anyone who's experienced similar whiplash in real life knows about that... residual grief period I guess? I think this was a core memory that informed a lot of Crowley's behavior in season 2, you don't ever really forget that moment you lost them no matter how brief. There's just something very loving and vulnerable in him being like "I thought you were gone, and even though I know now you're ok, I want you to know just thinking about it upsets me deeply."

#don’t just let male presenting characters cry when they’re at rock bottom #let them cry because ‘’whoo boy! that was really scary and I still have a lot of feelings ☹️’’ #good omens #ineffable husbands #season 1 #Aziraphale #crowley #aziracrow #meta #analysis #biceratops

[bixels]

(guy who sent in the original i thought you were a lesbian ask) i just wanted to say i still find you just as attractive with the knowledge that you are a man, apologies if i made you feel uncomfortable or like you're less handsome for not being a hot butch. you're still plenty hot regardless and i'm sorry for inflicting tony hawk's sapphic nightmare on you

Tony Hawk’s Sapphic Nightmare is very funny, I would photoshop something if I could right now. Thank you.

#ask me #anon #rest assured this isn’t bothering me #I’ve gotten replies and asks saying they thought I was trans or enby too #and honestly it’s kinda nice hearing this #I used to be very androgynous and while I’m not anymore #it’s still nice to feel andro. like I’m confident that I’m he/him but being called cute or pretty is nice. that’s why I don’t put pronouns #like it feels nice that I can be masculine and still have people think I’m enby or andro or feminine. it’s good

[napping-sapphic]

I just want to fall in love with someone who makes me feel safe like even when we’re angry or sad or upset i just want to know that both of us are still going to be okay

#wlw #wlw mood #sapphic #sapphism #lesbian #today was….not good #and at one point i had a moment #where i was just unbearably SAD and LONELY because i didn’t have anyone to call or talk to about it #but im still really hopeful it will happen some day #because all i want in this world is to feel secure #and for others to feel secure around me #and for everyone to feel secure around people they love #because it’s so painful and scary when you don’t #but one day im going to be warm and happy in someone’s arms and will barely remember this at all #im manifesting it #im completely okay btw things just got a little rough #and in the incredibly stressful and dramatic times i was experiencing my brain STILL had to be gay #im gay and i like sleeping #also yeah i said i wouldnt post after midnight again like two days ago but whatever #im sad and want to yearn on the internet we can make an exception tonight

[sivsii]

I sincerely hope every artist gets to have the experience of falling in love with their art someday. even if you have to fight for it. i think we all deserve to look at the result of our creativity all giddy and go holy shit, I loved making this! I love the lines I put down and the colors I used and the indulgences I’ve taken. I love seeing things I liked and taking it for my own, pushing and molding and playing. I can’t wait to do it again

#art stuff #maybe this is just me being all mushy or whatever but GOD #i used to hate my art so fucking much #i used to hate the act of creating so deeply that putting pen to paper knotted up my insides #and I don’t know HOW I grew through that but I did! i genuinely thought it was the end of such an important part of who I am #but it wasn’t! #and now for the last few years I’ve been consistently able to look at my art and feel proud of myself? like holy shit I made this! #i have such good taste! #and there have been times where I’ve hated the process or been dissatisfied with theresult ofc #art is fucking hard #art block and burnout is a bitch #but Ive still been able to look at the sum of my journey and just feel. satisfied. and accomplished #eager for growth but still proud of what I’ve made #idk #we all deserve that someday

[l-just-want-to-see]

hermitcraft season 10 so far includes a goat creeper going on his nth villain arc because of sand while two bystanders decide to make it worse through salmons, someone’s mental state being strongly affected by Minecraft fishing rates (not anymore tho stay safe out there), revolutionary mailing systems being installed, two guys building beautiful buildings while being passive aggressive about horses, the ocean and snails haunting the narrative, the server admin creating a system so that people that make a lot money from sales can spend it on trophies (really a fancy name for “taxes”), dog that has been meaning to be fired the whole time, essential government worker that hasn’t been seen in like.. the last decade etc etc. in the meantime zedaph is taking his mending villager on top of a chicken for a walk in the background

#I just 😭 #ok sorry I don’t know everything about everyone but still.. feel free to rb with more #grian #docm77 #skizzleman #geminitay #impulsesv #tangotek #pearlescentmoon #xisuma #rendog #zedaph #bless him #bdoubleo100 #bdubs #smallishbeans #okay good enough sorry I might’ve missed someone #hermitcraft

[nightlocked-in]

“peeta is bisexual” you guys are losing the vision. peeta isn’t even straight. katniss INVENTED sexuality for him. whatever katniss identifies as, he’s like “yeah, i’ll take that one” no questions asked

#katnissexual #i’m joking btw #and i agree with yall #he says you’ve ruined all other women for me #yeah twink we know #the hunger games #katniss everdeen #thg #nightlocked-in #everlark #peeta mellark #hunger games headcanon #hunger games incorrect quotes #thg incorrect quotes #bisexual peeta #peeta what’s your sexuality? #idk #what do u mean u don’t know #i’ve never thought about it #well i mean… do you like guys? do u like girls? #he thinks for a second…. girl #just one #katniss he says #i’m convinced in modern au’s when he’s dating someone else he just pictures katniss when fucking and then feels horribly guilty for it later #peeta why don’t you look at me during sex? #huh? oh glimmer uh… i just get distracted by how uh… good it feels. yeah that haha #katniss was his first love in every thing and not only was she his first love she was his ONLY love #so he’s never even considered being attracted to girls besides her #so when he tries to date he finds girls that are objectively attractive but on a scale of 1 to katniss they are still 1’s to him #and that never stops being a problem

[hannahhasafact]

Currently losing my goddamn mind regarding the new D20 season announcement

#ramblings #9.23.23 edit: turned off reblogs because why are ppl still reblogging this is old now #dimension 20 #dungeons and daddies #dndaddies #dimension 20 spoilers #this is all jokes but in all seriousness I literally stumbled when I saw Freddie IM SO EXCITED #but mainly!!! this cast!!! is so good!!!! I’m super excited #like tbh Danielle was like my fave part of misfits she was so funny??? and I feel like she didn’t get much time to shine #and I think Trapp is so fun like he was so good as sokbarr #and Siobhan is always a treat #literally only one person I don’t know in the cast but I’m excited! #also the theme seems right up my alley

[compaculaaa]

Please excuse my attempt at being funny

#transformers animated #tfa #tfa optimus prime #tfa sentinel prime #tfa elita one #alpha trion #sparkling siblings au #after draiwng so much I’m starting to crash #but here have a shitty comic of alpha trion accidentally creating a nuke #and his kids being absolutely terrified of it #like they see him adding random ass shit to the pan and they brace for impact #you’d think after 6 billion stellar cycles alpha learns how to cook #very cheesy but I wanted to get this out of my system #and maybe I’ll draw more adult sibling content #still practicing how to draw better more Tfa looking #as you can see from my op it’s not looking so good #but I just have to keep working #tq tq for the support as much as I feel like trash I’m glad others don’t #I hope at least #maccadam

[thatonechocogirl]

been feeling sick lately but heres koda waking up with his hair looking like a cockatoo

#disney #fanart #art #my art #don’t steal #brother bear #ber bros #kenai #koda #my bonnets been falling off while ive been sleeping and when i wake up my hair looks like a absolute mess #so thats what kinda inspired me to make this #im starting to feel a little bit better but still kinda meh #im actually so proud of this tho #i really love the way it turned out #bro slept GOOD

[dearreader]

i love our little corner of the fandom cause it’s all the same people. and even if we aren’t mutuals we at least know of each other’s existence and that feels a lot more welcoming than other sides of swiftie fandoms

#i feel like everyone’s also more accepting if smaller accounts cause followers aren’t a big deal #it’s just so so nice to have #we’re all multifandom basically but still interact with each others hyperfixations even of we don’t love them ourselves #like it just feels so nice and lovely at times here #ot can be bad but i like to think it’s still a good bubble #kelly babels

[kitamars]

hello. um. sorry for disappearing for like two months. imagine me getting hit with a truck called “The Worst Creative Block In Your Life” and getting thrown headfirst into the gintama rabbit hole. it’s quite cozy down here. i think i need help.

anyways, have a bunch of accumulated doodles plus this terrifying kagura as apology tehe :3

#well tbh the trigun fandom kinda burned me out as well #i couldn’t really keep up so i just. didn’t lol #kinda hated drawing for a bit after that but gintama’s been really good for me in that way #while i still really really wanna draw for it and i have a ton of doodles for it #i don’t really feel the need to keep up in a sense #i can just enjoy it at my own pace #(at my own pace being binging like 10 episodes a day) #but hey i need to at least try and take it easy before college yk #but now im horrifically attached to the entire cast and will cry if this so called comedy series even becomes a hint emotional #so you know #the usual #thanks for sticking around regardless! #i know i kinda flip flop a bunch between interests #but im glad to know you guys still wanna stick with me through them all #ily <3 #sakata gintoki #kagura #shimura shinpachi #yorozuya #gintama #ok bye

[lazylittledragon]

a 2 act tragedy starring me: i’ve been making fruit smoothies in the morning for a few days which has been great because it’s getting me to actually eat fruit for once, only to go on the internet and be told that it apparently releases all the natural sugars so it's actually Not that great for you and i am devastated

#ramble #i thought i was doing myself SO many favours #i ENJOY FRUIT i just don’t eat it for some reason related to adhd #context i am a long term ED sufferer so this kind of thing upsets me #honestly i don't care that much because it feels like it's better than Zero Fruit #can any dieticians put my mind at ease #someone explain how ‘the natural sugars are released and become Bad Sugar’ makes sense. like it’s all just the FRUIT #chanting to myself ‘there are no bad foods there are no bad foods there are no bad foods’ #like the Nutrients are still there and some of the fibre is still there #tw ed #on a lighter note current fave is pineapple+orange #also kiwi which i didn’t think would be good #edit: WAIT YOU’RE RIGHT WOULDN’T THE SUGARS BE RELEASED THE EXACT SAME WAY BY JUST CONSUMING THE FRUIT. WHAT THE FUCK

[erynalasse]

I wonder when the Noldor looked around at their dwindling numbers and realized that they were dying faster than they could ever keep up with.

#tolkien #silmarillion #I actually have a lot of feelings about this #because the noldor that come over from Valinor are pretty much all you get for the first age’s long war #birth rates are also in the basement if they exist at all #elves don’t have children during war #even if the siege of Angband is peaceful enough to relax that custom #I still don’t think you would have many children #elves have known war before - we know they did before the great journey #but it’s also got to be sobering to realize that your casualty rates are literally unsustainable #(like so #the house of finwë probably isn’t a representative sample of casualty rates #but damn the big picture still can’t be good #we have one grandchild of finwë who survives to the second age out of fifteen and that’s a very very bad rate) #what does that DO to a people group #to go from immortal and undying #to accepting that your whole clan is getting whittled down chunk by chunk #when did they start realizing that even if they beat Morgoth #they wouldn’t recognize the survivors

[puppyeared]

Why are ppl scared to call it what it is and say we’re still going thru covid on top of seasonal illness. Like. That’s pretty important right. I was watching the news and they were like oh yeah we have an unprecedented number of flu cases “as well as other sicknesses” without actually saying Covid. No announcement abt vaccinations or masking or anything. Also if I hear someone joking abt “war flashbacks” for mentioning covid I fucking hate u

#source: most of my family members are nurses and it was so bad for one of them they had to be put on a ventilator. in the hospital they #worked at. looking back I think I had a reason to feel a little offput by the shows of support early pandemic #with people tying blue ribbons around trees and lighting signs blue to support healthcare workers #I get that it was supposed to be moral support when we couldn’t do anything but follow health advisories #and it did matter to make them feel uplifted and do something than nothing. im not gonna deny that #but. you can still help now. u know that right. you still have a responsibility here #u can still mask up. u can still get vaxxed and call in sick to avoid infecting others #don’t leave it on healthcare workers to pick up the pieces just because they were doing it before. do u think they had a choice? #nobody likes picking up the slack for someone else and now that we have more tools to do smth couldn’t we just. do it???? #im not a virologist but i also feel like continuing to let it get worse by letting more mutations develop #could continue to set us back since this virus is pretty good at fucking us up long term and finding new ways to do that #while there are ppl still researching covid which is STILL A RELATIVELY NEW VIRUS. and studying possible treatment and cures #yapping #vent