#and one of my teammates says ew dont do that

[strawberri-syrup]

mmmmmmm i am going to explode if one more person belittles the things im passionate about and makes fun of me for it

#does one of my friends do it as a joke? #yes #does it still genuinly upset me? #yep #love her but also please dont tell me u hate the things i care about #even if its a joke #like #that hurts #i need to tell her that #i will #soon #also i fucking hate how often i talk abt an extracurricular im passionate about #and one of my teammates says ew dont do that #like ???????? #im sorry??????????????????????// #shut the fuck up??????????

[livelaughlovekageyama]

OOH! CAN I REQUEST A HINATA X MODEL!FEM!READER?

Like they’re dating since high school and how will the MSBY found out abt it???

Also they’re engaged 👀 like lmao I can already see the chaos when Hinata said so casually: “Oh! She’s my fiancé!” to his teammates 🤣😂

Hey!! I hope ur doing well and id love to do this!!

Also u guys seemed to rlly like this one so if u want more characters for an x model reader my requests are open!

Msby hinata x FEM! MODEL! Reader

~~~

-so you guys started dating in ur second year of hs

-the first time he saw u he was already in shock bc u were SO GODDAMN STUNNING so he decided to approach u straight up

-you were in one of his classes so he knew when to do it...but the actual execution was the issue😀

-he planned to be super smooth (got some advice and pickup lines from tanaka and noya) but as soon as you looked up at him he was a mess

-like he got his words messed up he was thinking thatd hed introduce himself but he was distracted by your hotness which brings us to this:

-“hi! Im hot! NO! no…yOURE HOT! AH…NO THAT SOUNDS CREEPY I MESSED UP I WANTED TO SAY IM HINATA- UGH, UHM, anyways haha, I think my nose is bleeding hah! Wait nevermind its just sweat….WAIT EW NO… I MEAN I DONT SWEAT AT ALL! ITS A MEDICAL CONDITION!!!! BUT UHM..I…CAN I START OVER???” 💀

-HELP HES SO FLUSTERED BUT U THOUGHT HE WAS CUTE SO U LET HIM KEEP TRYING😭

-so once he got it the best he could he invited u to his practice and u agreed!

-and despite ur odd first encounter you two hit it off!

-he asked u to be his gf he had flowers and everything set up perfectly (AND THOUGHT HE WAS GONNA SHIT HIMSELF WITH FEAR LMAOO)

-but of course u agreed and you guys were ADORABLE💖

-LIKE HE LOVED THAT YOU LIKED HIM FOR WHO HE WAS AND HE WAS OBSESSED WITH SHOWING U OFF TO THE KARASUNO TEAM

-TANAKA AND NOYA WOULD BE HEAD OVER HEELS FOR U AT PRACTICE AND YOU WOULD JUST SAY “im dating shoyo already” AND HINATA WOULD HAVE THE BIGGEST SMILE ON HIS FACE (literally this: >:D “MHM! SHES ALL MINE”)

-but anyways he didnt know that u wanted to be a model, so when he first followed your instagram he actually came to u abt the idea.

-(the text messages)

Hinata:

BABE BABE BABE

You:

WHAT WHAT WHAT

Hinata:

[pic from insta]

Hinata:

YOU ARE SO BUTIFULLLL OMG

You:

AWW THANK YOU LOVE😩💖

You:

AND IT’S ‘BEAUTIFUL’ BTW😭

Hinata:

SHHHHHH U KNOW WHAT I MEANT

Hinata:

ANYWAYS

Hinata:

YOU ARE SO PRETTY BABY OH MY GOD

Hinata:

IM SO LUCKY 

Hinata:

I JUST

Hinata:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGDYTWFDYCWTFCY💕

Hinata:

YOU COULD BE A MODEL

You:

YOU REALLY THINK SO?

LIKE ACTUALLY?

Hinata:

YES ACTUALLY!

Hinata:

YOU CAN DO ANYTHING U WANT BABE!!! BUT ESPECIALLY MODELING UR SO GORGUS Y/N I LOVE U 

You:

STOPP UR MAKING ME BLUSH SHOYO TYSM

You:

AND I LOVE U TOO<333

-SO THAT KINDA MADE U WANNA TRY MODELING GOING INTO COLLEGE

-AND YOU DID!!

-AND GUESS WHAT???

-YOU WERE INCREDIBLY SUCCESSFUL!!

-[i need to stop with the caps oml]

-but you became SUPER popular and hinata was ur biggest fan

-and we was always reposting and commenting anywhere he could

-hed comment things like “OH MY GOD😩” “PRETTY GIRL” “HAND IN MARRIAGE PLEASE🤭💍" “THIS IS MY GF RIGHT HERE!!”

-hes so in love

-and so are you

-which is why you guys got engaged very early on!

-as soon as he knew u were ready he popped the big question and asked for ur hand in marriage

-it was so cute and u guys are so happy together😩

-SO ANYWAYS hes playing for msby now as u are modeling

-and even though hes head over heels for u he can still be a lil bit of a dumbass sometimes

-like it genuinely just slipped his mind to ever bring u up to the team LMAO

-but one day lets say atsumu invited hinata, sakusa, and bokuto over after practice to hang out right

-when hinata went to the bathroom bokuto stumbled across your instagram page and was like “hey whos this? Shes really pretty” and obviously that had atsumus attention so he was looking at ur page as well

-they were going through when atsumu found an early post and was breezing through ur comments but bokuto suddenly stopped him and looked at the phone

-”is that hinata whos commenting all that stuff?”

-the two of them kept going through and started LAUGHING AT THE COMMENTS

-”OH MY GOD” “NO WAY SHOYO IS ABSOLUTELY WHIPPED FOR SOME RANDOM MODEL” “HES CLAIMING TO BE HER BF PFFFT” “NAHH HE IS DOWN BAD”

-they are both such dumbasses LMAO

-but hinata at this point came back and wanted to know whats up so they asked him why he was so obsessed with some model

-and this boy straight up was like “Oh! Im gonna be marrying her! Did I not tell u guys?”

-THEY THOUGHT HE WAS JOKING AND KEPT LAUGHING UNTIL SAKUSA FINALLY CHIPPED IN

-”guys, it doesnt seem like hes joking”

-THAT FINALLY GETS MF TWEEDLE DEE AND TWEEDLE DUM TO STFU

-ATSUMUS JUST LIKE “wait actually” AND HINATAS NOW ALL MAD

-”HEY! WHYS THAT SO HARD TO BELIEVE!?” -but anyways they kind of believe him, but kinda dont, so hinata is gonna introduce u to them at his next game

-SO THE DAY OF THE GAME FINALLY COMES ALONG

-AND HINATA IS SO EXCITED

-msby won the game and they were all high on adrenaline

-you came running down and jumped into hinatas arms and was SO EXCITED FOR HIM

-YOU WERE KISSING ALL OVER HIS FACE AND TELLING HIM HOW PROUD OF HIM U WERE AS HE JUST HAD THE BIGGESTS GRIN ON HIS FACE

-BOKUTO AND ATSUMU WAS IN SHOCK.

-or let me clarify, EVERYONE WAS IN SHOCK

-Y/N L/N WAS DATING SHOYO HINATA

-REPORTERS WERE GOING CRAZY TAKING PICTURES AND VIDEOS

-AND ONCE THEY WERE POSTED EVERYONE ADORED U GUYS

-”i wish someone would love me the way y/n loves hinata😔” “THEYRE SO CUTE AWHH” “best couple”

-YOU GUYS ARE EVERYWHERE, BUT U HONESTLY DIDNT CARE

-U WERE JUST HAPPY TO HAVE EACH OTHER TBH

10/10 AGAIN, HINATAS A SIMP AND WILL SHOW U OFF ANY CHANCE HE GETS💖

#haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x you #haikyuu fluff #hq headcanons #hinata shoyo x reader #hinata x reader #hinata fluff #hinata shoyo x y/n #timeskip hinata

[fiesty-fishbiscuit]

the absolute weirdest thing about playing ash after basically only playing horizon for 3 months is when i'm pressing the thanks (or any interaction really) button

and im sitting there thinking aaa you literal lifesaver ilysm omg thank you thank you

but instead of getting the lovely thanks! 😊 lines i'm used to i get the literal vocal embodiment of the 😒 🙄😑 face and it just catches me off guard every time shhdeljf

#like it would be weird if that *didnt* happen because yk thats just how she Is but #its pretty funny #going like ohgodno im coming dont die youll be ok!! #and then the accompanying line that my teammates hear is just like Ew you got shot? youre so pathetic literally just dont do that #apex legends #help one time someone gave me a ton of shield cells and i tried to show gratitude by spam crouching but i forgot that that automatically #gives the option to do a quip and the only one i have atm is the overkill one bc yk tf2 callback so i hope they didnt think i was saying #that them giving mr all those cells was overkill bc it was actually so nice #ahaaa anyways

[misora-msby]

embarrassing moments with inarizaki

inarizaki always looks so cool but you know they’re actually dorks and i am here to provide you the content to show theyre clowns. enjoy the headcanons :)

Kita Shinsuke

firstly. kita shinsuke being embarrased? making a mistake? unheard of.

he’s a perfect man and we all know it.

anyways

you two were having a nice dinner out together. 

it was a pretty fancy place so you decided to dress in a different style today

but you were beginning to wonder if kita liked it or not because he seemed to keep looking past your shoulder instead of at you

he was an observant guy so you were wondering if something had happened behind you

but you couldn’t hear anything weird so you assumed not

you decided to just stay quiet about it at first but now it was beginning to become annoying! 

why wasn’t he looking you in the eye to speak?

midway through your dinner, kita finally spoke up tho

“y/n, your shirt is slipping... yer bra’s showing.”

oh.

right. you were wearing your off-shoulder top.

“o-oh. shin, it’s that kind of shirt, you know?” you had to explain your outfit to ur bf with a pink face.

“oh... that so... well it’s cold these days so if yer feelin’ cold lemme know. i’ll give ya my jacket.”

GOD HES SO PERFECT KITA SHINSUKE I HOPE U MARRY HIM???????

Ojiro Aran

another man with next to no flaws.

but nature says everyone has to make some mistake.

so it was a regular school day, our aran has just come to class from morning practice and there’s still some time left until class starts.

all the girls in class are gathered around a table

he’s not sure why, it’s probably watching an idol video

but ur man wants to be a little romantic!!

plus he just showered so he smells Great uwu

he goes over and hugs you from behind, placing his chin on ur head.

“hey, bb whatcha ya doin”

all the girls gasp.

he doesn’t get whats wrong, it’s not like it’s a secret y’all are dating

pda to this level aint bad either

especially compared to his teammate miya atsumu

“ojiro aran.”

why is your voice behind him

he looks down and nearly faints when he sees he hugged the wrong girl.

to be fair she looked a lot like you from behind, just maybe 1cm shorter.

“i’m so sorry!” he keeps apologising to literally everyone and all the class is giggling bc they never seen their school’s ace so red before.

“didn’t think i’d come back from the toilet and see my bf cheatin”

“IT WAS A MISTAKE! I’M SERIOUS! Y/N U KNOW I LOVE YA!” 

hes so funny i swear

the volleyball team hears of it and it gets even better 

Miya Atsumu

it’s not a secret that miya atsumu, setter of the inarizaki volleyball team and invited to national youth training camp, had a gf

he was very much in love with u 

the whole class knew it because he’d show it off whenever he could too

so here comes valentines day

last year he received like... 50 different gifts from girls and guys aiming to win his love.

you didnt even give him one lmAOOOOO 

but this year, he had been not so subtly trying to hint that “i better not receive any chocolates this year when i’ve got a gf!”

he reaches school and plops into his seat.

there’s an anonymous box of chocolates with “please accept my love, miya-kun! <3″ on it

“the hell’s this?!”

“oh? chocolates?” - osamu who just popped his head into the class to shove into his twin’s face how much chocolate he got.

especially since the blond was off limits, the grey-haired twin had a bigger following now.

“do they not know i have a girlfriend...”

“well, ya might as well eat it. ya dont know who to return it to.”

“that’s like receivin’ their love!”

“no it ain’t. it’s just food.”

atsumu couldn’t argue with that and popped a piece in.

it was very delicious. the chocolate practically melted on his tongue and was the perfect sweetness and was filled with a delicious ganache too.

it was perfect

but he couldn’t accept this!

“it ain’t even good. too sweet and the filling’s sticky.”

“ah. really? is that what you think, tsumu?” you ask from the door where you had been watching the exchange take place.

“y/n! look at this! some weirdo gave me some choco and like... samu said to test it but i’ll toss it out, promise.”

“tsumu, i made that... i wrote it anonymously because i thought you’d know it was me and i wanted to tease you a little.”

“huh.”

osamu: “yeah actually i went over to her place to teach her how to make it.”

atsumu: “you said you went to suna’s place?!”

osamu: “i went there later but i first went to help her.”

you: “anyways if it’s not good i don’t mind if you toss it out...”

tsumu: “NO NO BABE I PROMISE IT’S GOOD”

you: “you just said-”

“BABE I SWEAR IT’S GOOD I JUST DIDN’T WANT TO ACCEPT A STRANGER’S STUFF”

“you’re always so honest though... are you sure?” you were having your fun teasing him now.

“BB PLSSSSSS”

he still cringes at the memory 4 years into ur marriage

Miya Osamu

osamu would DEFINITELY make home made dinner dates a regular thing.

this alone shows he’s the better twin - miya atsumu stan

he loves cooking and eating with you so sometimes when he’s got a day off you guys’ll set aside the afternoon to make a real nice dinner

imagine candlelit dinner with miya dorito body osamu in a suit

of course some fun stuff happens after too ;)))

and today’s your third anniversary!!

so osamu adds lots of ‘natural aphrodisiacs’ to the meal

i’m talkin

garlic bread and soup for an appetiser, a nice juicy steak with garlic and red wine sauce for the main, and chocolate coated strawberries for dessert

mm yummy

you two cleaned your plates completely (it was very delicious) and as you were washing the dishes, osamu comes up behind and wraps his arms around your waist

“yes, ‘samu?” 

“i’ve already prepared us a nice bath with yer favourite scents.” he’s got his head resting on ur chin

“really? thank you~ i’ll be there in a bit”

but he doesn’t let go of you while you’re still scrubbing at the baking sheets.

“osamu, you can let go for now.”

“don’t feel like it.”

“i gotta wash the dishes since you did most of the cooking.”

“mmm, i’ll do it if ya gimme a kiss.”

you roll ur eyes bc what a cutie 

u turn ur head to give him a kiss but suddenly he 

he burps

that garlicy wine smell is just kinda there

“ew! ‘samu!!”

his face is real red but he’s also trying not to laugh because he’s still a dude and this is absolutely hilarious to him

“want another?” he starts teasing

“i’m not getting in the bath with you.”

“wait wait wait i’m sorry, i’ll go brush my teeth and give you a proper kiss”

Suna Rintarou

you two were taking the train home today

it was quite late due to practice going a little longer than usual, so he insisted he walked you back home today.

sunarin can be a good boyf sometimes ok

it was getting a little crowded on the train tho, since people were heading home or going out for dinner

luckily you had already grabbed seats so you were quite comfortable sitting side by side. 

you and suna have the type of relationship were you dont have to talk all the time

silence is v comfy.

he’s just scrolling through twitter on his phone while you’re looking around the car, lost in ur thoughts

suddenly you notice an old lady standing a little bit away from you and you stand up

“baa-san, please take my seat.” you whisper in the crowded carriage

“oh how kind of you. thank you, dearie.” she smiles and takes your seat while you stand in front of her and suna instead.

suna doesn’t realise this exchange has happened tho

(he’s on his phone as usual)

probably starting some fights on twitter

he decides to try to be a little romantic and pretends to stretch his arm around (who he thought was) you.

“rin.” 

why is your voice right in front of him?

“young man, i appreciate it but i’m married.”

suna jumps as he sees someone he did not recognise next to him.

he looks up and notices you had moved.

you’re giggling

the granny’s giggling

atsumu and osamu sitting opposite on the carriage look like they’re going to cry because they’re trying not to laugh

“i was just stretching. really.” he mumbles and crosses his arms, face red as a tomato

he’s so embarrassed.

Ginjima Hitoshi

sometimes the inarizaki vbc would go for an after practice snack at the nearby family mart

they were really hungry after an intense preparation for nationals which was in two weeks so kita insisted they all get something to fill them up on the way home

but lucky lucky ginjima hhehe

you (his classmate who he had a crush on) were working at the cash register today.

“welcome!” you greet everyone as they enter

he cant help but stiffen up a bit 

why are u so cute and cheery today

the 2nd years already know what to do.

“heyy, i think last week i bought ya that ramen right? ya owe me my konbini snacks today!” - atsumu

“yeah. you lost a bet to me last week so u gotta pay up. a pack of jelly fruit sticks please.” - suna

“forgot my money today, mind payin’ for my snacks too?” - osamu

“like hell i’m paying for all of you. especially you, osamu. you eat too much all the time.” 

aran’s noticed what’s going on,

“hey, if it’s just for today you can do it right? if ‘samu don’t pay ya back tomorrow i’ll nag him ‘til he does.” 

“fine...” his basket is full when he goes to the counter.

he’s trying his best not to have a red face while watching u scan the items, ur hair swaying slightly as u look back and forth between the objects and the screen.

“alright. 4,890 yen please!” GOD he hated how expensive it was, that’s almost all his weekly allowance but bc it’s u and ur voice saying it it’s kinda ok

“mm, ok.” he still has his eyes on you while he takes out his wallet and puts it on the counter.

yes

his wallet, not the money

“...” “...”

“excuse me, sir. this is...”

he almost slaps his face wtf he’s so embarrassed.

“s-sorry. just a little absent minded after practice.” he starts pulling out his cash.

“it’s fine! i know how hard you guys practice!” you smile while performing the rest of the transaction and pass him his big bag of goods. “good luck for nationals, ginjima-kun!”

he almost runs out of the store and is about to fight the rest of the 2nd years for watching and (suna) recording

#inarizaki x reader #atsumu x reader #osamu x reader #kita x reader #suna x reader #aran x reader #ginjima x reader #miya atsumu #miya atsumu x reader #miya osamu x reader #miya osamu #kita shinsuke x reader #suna rintarou x reader #ojiro aran x reader #ginjima hitoshi x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu imagines #misoramsby #suna rintarou #kita shinsuke #ojiro aran #ginjima hitoshi

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being a clumsy Avenger

Avengers x reader

warnings: various injuries

a/n:

prompt: anonymous: “Headcanons for the Avengers with a really clumsy reader?”

okay, so sometimes* the avengers worried about you

*most of the time

but you were still a really heavy-hitter, thankfully you weren’t a spy

honestly, sometimes you couldn’t tell if your scrapes and/or bruises were from combat or just a normal day off the job

“woah! where’d that bruise come from, jar jar?” -tony

“hah! i understood that reference!” -cap

“firstofalltony, dont ever call me jar jar again or else i’ll throw you across the room”

you had a tendency to be clumsy with words, too, jumbling them together or tripping over words altogether

absolutely eating shit in front of your teammates at LEAST biweekly, you cant count how many times you’ve gotten back on your feet and tasted actual grass in your mouth

“ew, ew, ew” *spitting everywhere*

T O E S T U B B I N G

not cool, man, not cool

missions could be...interesting

embarrassing, really, like imagine your weapon just completely falling out of your hand while youre trying to fight a bad guy

avengers keep an eye on you to make sure you dont get killed because you weren’t paying attention

tony had/has a jarvis/friday program that monitors your activity during missions and occasionally alerts you of: tree branches, incoming vehicles, hostiles, etc.

“y/n, there’s a combat vehicle one hundred feet away going eighty miles per hour, brace yourself or move quick”

“thanks for the heaDS UP FRIDAY!”

you had to dive out of the way

you hit your head on the way down

the avengers insisting that you wear more protective gear

“no, im not wearing a helmet, elbow and knee pads, and shin guards on missions”

“‘on missions?’ we didn’t say anything about missions. this is for the compound, we’re very concerned for your health”

sometimes you get lucky and your unfortunate accidents work out for the best

like the time you slipped on ice and accidentally fired your blaster at a sniper that you weren’t aware of

theres a ramp-like entrance to a lab in avengers tower that is very slippery, you managed to fall on it a grand total of nine times before bruce slipped and tony deemed it a hazard

“maybe we should just baby-proof this place? me and laura had to do that with all our kids” -clint

“honestly, that might just work” -nat

they fuckin baby proofed the base

“what the hell is this?!”

“for your safety” -cap

thor made it a mission to keep you away from glass SPECIFICALLY he was scared you’d fall into it and be very hurt :/

there have been several outings that have resulted in you spraining your ankle

“im good! im good, im okay” you say as you limp

the avengers take turns carrying you

“it’s not my turn, nat, it’s steves!” -tony

they dont let you carry important things anymore after u almost dropped the tesseract case

as new avengers arrived, they began to look out for you, too

peter’s spider-sense was a blessing to you because he’s be able to catch you before you fell

and wanda occasionally used her telekinesis to your advantage

when pietro was still alive, he’d use his speed to stop you from falling over debris

sam just fuckin laughs at you (but he does help you back up)

thankfully there are many medical supplies at your disposal

“guys? can someone get me a band aid..? maybe some gauze?”

“y/n, what the hell happened?”

“i messed up :(”

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartlisbeth // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @allthecreativeonesaretaken // @frostedgiant // @praellee // @emygirl //

#avengers #avengers x reader #avengers imagine #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #steve rogers imagine #tony stark imagine #steve rogers x reader #tony stark x reader

[smrtnik07]

headcanons. press J to skip, or fuck urswlf

ok so she has never been sober in her life ever since coming out of ningguangs wokmb she has been either on laughing gas, weed, meth or a mix of those. she ate her own scabs as a kid and loved to rollerblade. since shes ningguangs birthchild she has money for drugs but if she ever ran out shes a social butterfly so she can platonically seduce people into gifting her some for free.. shes too nice for her own good and often gets bullied by straight people. even tho shes halfway to one of them....but she enjoys women a lot...FUCK YEA WOMEN.... girl udont need men thet dont deserve u pls do better. she kins.

homophobe. kinda might maybe have a crush on street!meiko tho. anyways she has daddy issues and craves male attention. brought toothpaste to school so her breath was always fresh when she had fun with boys between classes....poor girl anyways uhhh she played volleyball and got along well with her teammates, even tho they all called her a whore behind her back. now shes in street sekai and hates her life bc shes surrounded by gay people and theyre proud of it. shes a masosadist but couldnt top a man bc of her complexes.. drank a lot a few years back, and is a smoker. smokes them fucking mint scented ciggys idk man..ew

closeted lesbian! baby gay! just discovered what gays are bc of her bandmates (minori is a gay simp loser i love her. shes so gay.) so miku had a .. good example of what being gay is nd related to it! she likes tht blue bitch from her band idk her name shizuku or sum..but also mm rin kinda sexy anyways she did rhythmic gymnastics as a kid and nobody really liked her that much?? she was alone n had like. one or two friends. they were so close? they were like almost poly n miku kissed them n didnt even realize thats. like. not straight. shes afraid of men even tho her parents r ok i think she has an older brother who kinda . didnt treat her well so she had bad experiences she loves summer for some fucking reason and collects seashells. has an obsession with owls(understandable). doesnt kin even tho she knows whatit is. uses nashville filter on all instagram posts.

bi queen! has red streaks bc she saw it on tiktok n thought it was cool. actually likes the trampstamps aesthetic but also listens to nashimoto so shes forgiven?? listens to serbian garage punk..ew lets say she has ranged music taste... likes lo fi the most tho. shes on the autistic spectrum but its very mild. she enjoys milfs and has mommy issues and would LOVE owner from bndori i feel it in my bones. her fav song ever is roki. she has been in so many relationships that lasted like 2 weeks... doesnt know the diff between platonic and romantic love. just wants to fuck older ladies and zhongli

honestly too kind for her own good. i mayb kin her a little but just a little but like dont tell anybody also the rest of this is not projection i swear shes very confused ab herself she has brain fog constantly and she doesnt really think. shes like a dog,empty eyes empty brain. she listens to her bandmates when they vent n cry n shes just there. warm. they can hug her for comfort. sometimes she decides to actually listen to them n helps them out/ even tho theyre all emo bastards. if she didnt dissociate constantly she would literally go insane. shes a doll mizuki just dresses up n shes always acting like shes on very strong sedatives. cries when the bandmates leave for school. has adhd inattentive type. her fav book is the little prince even thjo its the only one she ever read. really likes kanade but kanade is ace n aro... <//3 gl queen!

#pls dont read this fhsjdakk

[onigirisamu]

Heloooooooooo! I wanna request about [headcanons] black jackals are having a fun blast at the amusement park but at the one of the rides, atsumu throws up all over SAKUSA 😂 Please! Please!

OM.g I TOTALLY SEE THIS HAPPENING THIS IS SO FUNNY WSKKSJD poor kiyoomi 😭😭 atsumu really said 🤢🤮🤮

➽───────────────❥

𝐚𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐟𝐮𝐧 𝐟𝐭. 𝐦𝐬𝐛𝐲

pairing: none

warnings: mentions of nausea and motion sickness

genre: crack tbh

➽───────────────❥

so this was mostly hinata and bokuto's idea

they had just won a match in tokyo and they all wanted to wander a bit before going home

hinata sits in his bed, in the shared hotel room with bokuto and he mindlessly searches for things to do in tokyo

something had immediately caught his eye

"BOKUTO-SAN LOOK"

bokuto looks at his friends phone and is immediately agressively agreeing

the two knocked simultaneously on the door next door, where sakusa and atsumu currently resided

"oh my god your knocking is so loud what" sakusa says finally opening the door

"do you two want to come to disneyland??"

atsumu sits up from his bed his ears perking up, suddenly interested in the topic

"no-" "WERE GOING"

so sakusa practically got dragged by his teammates since shugo, shion, adriah, and oliver went out to go shopping

they all got tickets from the app and went on over to the amusement park

"WOAHHH LOOK AT THE CASTLE" bokuto shouts

"HINATA QUICK TAKE A PICTURE WITH ME AND GOOFY" atsumu and hinata runs towards the mascot, giggling and fumbling for their phones like idiots

sakusa is so dreading this moment, he has to deal with these people he calls his teammates and he also has to deal with crowds oof

id also like to think that they all got mickey and minnie headbands just bc

they first went to the haunted mansion, all of them weren't really scared but for some reason they kept pushing each other and almost made hinata trip

all of them then agreed to go get something eat

everyone got all sorts of things, jumping from cart to cart and restaurant to restaurant but so far, it seems like atsumu and bokuto were the ones that ate the most lmfao

atsumu was the usual, taking photos of his food before eating his last churro "so where to next??" he asked while chewing

they then headed to tomorrow land to ride space mountain because practically bokuto begged them to go even though they just ate

hinata and atsumu being dumb just said yes!!!!!! LETS GO

while sakusa was face palming

all of them were expectedly screaming and shouting from the force of the coaster itself

it was a speedy and flashy ride, everyone seemed to be enjoying it without any complications despite eating before hand

SO sakusa concluded that he's hanging out with a bunch of monsters with stomachs of steel

it was suddenly getting dark and they they were arguing on what to ride last

they eventually agreed on the alice in wonderland tea cups ride

sakusa wasn't worried, he only ate a little and they all monsters anyways so fuck it

they all got in the ride and as soon as the ride went, bokuto grabbed the steering wheel and turned it as fast as he can

"WHEEEEEEEEE" hinata puts his hands up

"W-W-W AIT A MINUTE-" atsumu grips the steering wheel to stop bokuto from spinning it

they were still spinning uncontrollably from the force but sakusa knew from this dude's face that he's gonna fucking puke

kiyoomi made a disgusted face as he watched atsumu clutch his stomach

the ride finally came to a stop and hinata was still cheering, unaware that his friend was near to puking his brains out

and then it happened

on sakusa's jacket none the less

sakusa just about died right there and then

"oh my g-"

"DONT SAY A WORD"

HE WAS FUMING

EW ICKY ATSUMU THREW UP ON HIM GOD SAVE HIM

they got off the ride and sakusa immediately took off his jacket and took out wipes from his bag to clean himself off

he wanted to strangle the blonde so bad but he'll do it when he's clean

"IM SO SORRY SAKUSA AAAAAAA PLEASE DONT KILL ME AAAAAAAAAA"

"JUST CARRY MY SOILED JACKET AND DONT MENTION THIS TO ANYONE"

they all went back to hotel and sakusa took a long ass shower as hinata and bokuto told everyone anyways 🗿

all of their teammates bursted out laughing and it was dubbed the "tokyo disneyland incicedent"

#msby headcannons #msby imagines #order up! #bonito #bokuto kotarou imagines #miya atsumu imagines #hinata shoyo imagines #sakusa kiyoomi imagines #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios #miya atsumu #bokuto kotarou #hinata shoyo #sakusa kiyoomi

[ribcage-rodents]

Post three

Kidflash

A few moments of silence passed before Kidflash chose to break the tension, he leaned towards Wonder Girl balancing on one arm.

“So beautiful, what's the weather like- or uh I mean I bet it’s always hot on Thymisaca, oh wait, it used to always be hot until you left!”

Kidflash smiled weakly slowly shuffling back to his post as Wonder Girl remained unimpressed.

Thug

A phone chimed dimly one of the thugs paused, placing his cards face down on the table he pulled out his phone. He nodded to the other goons.

“Boss says it’s go-time.”

The thugs left the table, one staying behind to gather up the deck, stopping to gather up a bag or two each as they exited the old rotting building. The young heroes shared a look although they stayed frozen in place.

Speedy

Speedy mumbled several curse words directed to his teammates before following the guards.

Garth

“Wait! We need to contact our mentors first,”

Garth stepped forward, glowering at Speedy.

Speedy

“Oh my god what is up with you and rules!?”

Speedy whipped around to yell in Garth’s face.

Wonder Girl

“No I agree with Garth, this mission is too important to play hero, we need to call the Justice League.”

Wonder Girl placed both hands on her hip once she joined the other two heroes in the middle of the room.

Kidflash

Kidflash popped up from behind the crates.

“Yeah, I can call unc-Flash and you guys can make sure they dont leave or something,”

Kidflash scratched his neck uncomfortably.

Speedy

Speedy groaned loudly,

“No, it's fine I’ll do it,”

The other heroes headed towards the door, once Speedy was alone he took out their emergency phone, he didn’t turn it on as held it up to his ear.

“Hey GA the thugs are heading out, we’re gonna follow them…”

Speedy looked over his shoulder to make sure that the others weren’t eavesdropping, he shoved the phone back into his pocket.

“Idiots, I don’t need GA monitoring me like some little kid.”

He then followed after his teammates.

“Alright, JL gave us the go-ahead, what’s the plan?”

Speedy asked now crouched in the shadow of the rotted building.

Wonder Girl

“They’re loading up a jet, I think if we-”

Wonder Girl started leaning towards Speedy, her face twisted into an irritated scowl as he cut her off.

Speedy

“Nevermind I got this, honestly this mission is too easy,”

He chuckled lightly as he stood up stringing and shooting an arrow before the others could intervene. Speedy turned to his team a smug look plastered on his face.

Wonder Girl

Wonder Girl also stood up snarling at Speedy,

“Before you gloat might wanna check your aim,”

Speedy

Speedy revolted back moving out of her space,

“Hey I have perfect aim.”

Kidflash

“Well you didn’t hit the mark man, uh.. might’ve had to do with the shiny boomerang,”

Kidflash spoke from the ground, his eyes trained on the cargo plane as the guards loaded up the last couple of bags.

All three other heroes looked at him with differentiating levels of bewilderment.

Garth

“What do you mean ‘shiny boomerang’, I don’t think I know that landie lingo.”

Garth’s normally gruff threatening voice sounded a fraction less judgemental.

Behind him Wonder Girl peered with cautious curiosity and Speedy made a face at ‘Landie Lingo’.

Kidflash

Kidflash shifted uncomfortably under the sudden intense attention despite trying to win the group over earlier.

“Uh.., so super-speedy-vision, Speedy’s arrow was knocked down by something really shiny that flew through the air, I’m not sure what actually happened to it,”

Speedy

Speedy groaned in frustration curling his hands into fists.

“What’re we supposed to do now!?”

Garth

“Shut up!”

Garth whispered harshly, holding a hand up to stop Speedy from challenging him again.

“Look,”

He pointed at the reflective metal melting onto the plane.

Kidflash

Kidflash darted forward pricking the boomerang from the plane, he turned around smiling brightly at his teammates.

In a fluid movement Robin lept from the roof of the rotted building rolling across the pavement and shooting up to deliver a hard punch to the underside of Kidflash’s jaw. He reeled back rubbing his reddening chin, Robin swung his leg at his head then pushed him down sitting on his stomach he whipped out some rope from underneath the thick shadow of his cape tying him up like a calf. Robin threw another batarang at the plane. As Wonder Girl chased after the projectile Speedy tried to tackle Robin, hitting the ground harshly as the other boy dodged him.

Speedy

“Hey Aqua-loser mind helpin’ out!”

Speedy called out to Garth, who stood motionless in the building's shadow, as he shot an arrow at Robin who threw another batarang to block it.

Robin pulled out a batarang and a little red dot securing the dot as he ran after the plane lifting off, Wonder Girl stood up from where she had been trying to untie Kidflash. Stooping down she picked up an old brick from the rotted building. She chucked it, the brick slamming into the side of his head. It knocked him to the ground allowing Speedy to tackle him, flipping him over and repeatedly punching him. Robin tucked his leg to his chest kicking Speedy hard in the stomach, he groaned rolling on the ground. Robin slid away trying to run but only succeeding in stumbling recklessly down the runway one gloved hand coming up and under his hood to press against where the brick and made contact. He shot a grappling line after the plane although as he was yanked into the sky Speedy wrapped himself around his waist. Wonder Girl grabbed Garth's arm and Kidflash’s hand dragging them after the other two heroes, Kidflash held tightly to her as he used his now free hand to grab Speedy’s ankle, the pull of the grappling hook stalled by the teens weight dangling high above the churning dark ocean. Speedy huled himsef up using Robin’s shoulder as leverage taking one of his arrow’s out of it’s holder he set to work trying to saw through the rope, Robin elbowed him in the stomach.

Speedy

“Ow! Watch it short, dark, and demon-y”

Speedy yelped kneeing him in the thigh with the leg not holding the weight of the rest of his team. Speedy continued to slash the rope.

Robin

“Stop it! If you cut the line then we’re all gonna go down,”

He warned, his voice high but demanding.

Speedy

“Oh no! Will the cold water shrink your cloak?!”

Speedy mocked him as the line thinned.

Garth

Garth looked up at Speedy from where he was hanging in Wonder Girl’s grip.

“No, the ocean is restless tonight, if we fall we could die,”

Speedy

“Yeah well I’m not afraid of a little water,”

Speedy said sawing quicker.

Wonder Girl

Wonder Girl stared into the swirling dark water below a frown working itself onto her face.

“Speedy stop we need to come up with a better plan.”

The line snapped. The group plummeted downwards, Kidflash struggling with renewed motivation to untie his legs as Robin threw one last bugged batarang hitting the underside of the plane’s wing.

Scene 10

Dark water sloshed over them messily as they struggled to breath, Garth sunk beneath the water disoriented from the impact of hitting the sea. Luckily the group had landed close to shore, Wonder Girl reemerged first, flailing she grabbed Speedy, who had a looser grip on his consciousness, together they slowly started to swim in the direction of the blurry shoreline. Kidflash yelped as he frantically swung his arms and bound legs in an attempt to stay above the surface. Robin popped up last his hood plastered over his face, he followed Speedy and Wonder Girl towards the shore but stopped shortly, looking back at the sinking speedster Robin huffed switching directions to help save the other hero. He looped an arm under his and dragged Kidflash over to the shore. The teens collapsed on the beach coughing up water clinging to each other.

Wonder Girl

Wonder Girl disentangled from Speedy propping herself up she squinted at the foggy sea.

“Garth!”

Speedy

“He lives in the ocean dude he's fine,”

Speedy snarked from where he laid in the sand.

Wonder Girl

Wonder Girl whipped around glaring angrily at him.

“He’s still a part of our team, we need to look out for him!”

Garth

“I’m fine, the water is too choppy to sleep in… or sail.”

Garth emerged from the water a grimace fixed on his face. Garth stopped sitting in the shallows.

Kidflash

Robin groaned quietly leaning away from Kidflash.

“Ew! Dude get off me!”

He yelped wiggling away from the other boy frantically, he paused looking at the cloaked figure.

“Unless you’re a girl?”

He asked, hopefully raising both eyebrows at Robin, who was now propped up with both arms.

“I mean you’re kinda sitting like a girl would..”

He trailed off staring at the way Robin’s legs were curled to the side.

Robin

Robin stood up swaying slightly as he disappeared into the thick vegetation.

The other heroes spent a few more moments lying in the sand, the only noise being Speedy’s mumbled insults directed at Kid Flash's ability to talk to girls.

“I’m not a monster. I wouldn’t leave someone to die.”

Scene 11

The on-call leaguers shift about in a daze gabbing food or hot drinks before shuffling back to their rooms. Occasionally giving eachother tired looks or taking part in quiet conversations. Wonder Woman is perched on the console holding a small pre-packaged salad. Leaning over to talk with Batman she tucked back a long, black, curl behind her ear. The corner of Batman’s mouth twitched his shoulders relaxing a fraction, the moment was short-lived as his face turned into a grimace and his back tensed.

Batman

Wonder Woman had moved to place a hand on his shoulder, the beginning of a question, leaving her mouth as he shot up from his chair. The flash who was busy empting the kitchen looked up three fries sticking out of his mouth.

“Flash you’re on monitor duty.”

He called, jabbing his finger at the Flash who looked immediately terrified, but nonetheless grabbed as much surgery junk food as he could carry and dashed towards the console.

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman caught up to him gripping his shoulder hard and pulling him back.

“What is happening?”

She pinned him to the spot with a piercing stare.

Batman

Batman let out an agitated groan as he gave in slumping slightly.

“I was reading through Robin’s latest mission report, he was working on tracking down Two-Face’s suppliers. Turns out the suppliers are the same men that Little League is supposed to be watching.”

Wonder Women

Wonder Woman stared at him raising a questioning eyebrow.

“Why is this an issue?”

Her voice was exasperated, as it often was when talking with Batman, placing both hands on her hips.

Batman

Batman sighed.

“Neither know that they’re taking down the same group, this could cause a collision.”

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman raised her other eyebrow sending an annoyed look at Batman's explanation.

“You’re worried about our sidekicks outnumbering Robin?”

Batman

“No, Robin can take care of himself, I’m worried that he’ll ignore his own needs when the others fail. He’s always had too big of a heart for his own good.”

He finished his statement turning away towards the transporters.

Wonder Woman

Wonder Woman was annoyed but she followed him anyway.

“Ah yes the compassion for others, every great hero’s biggest flaw.”

Batman

Batman only grunted in response.

“I can’t pick up any feedback from the tracker in his belt or in his arm.”

He purposely ignored Wonder Woman’s judgemental scoff at the arm tracker comment, instead he continued into the transporter his last decipherable words the beginning of instructions.

“I’ll look into tracking him down, stay here, don’t alert the others yet. I’ll contact you when I have more information.”

Scene 12

Kidflash rolled over in the sand groaning as his stomach grumbled loudly, Wonder Girl reached over to place a hand on his pale, sweaty cheek. Speedy grumbled, tossing a rock at Garth’s forehead.

Wonder Girl

“That’s it I’m going to go find him some food.”

Wonder Girl declared standing up and striding into the jungle. She paused briefly as Speedy’s voice followed her.

Speedy

“Don’t let Shadow Man get you!”

Wonder Girl

Wonder Girl squeezed her eyes shut taking a deep breath before continuing into the forest on high alert, her hands flexed as she spotted a small bird picking at the ground. Steading herself Wonder Girl launched forward easily grabbing the bird, with a practiced hand she prepared to kill it.

Robin

“Wait!”

The same high-pitched, muffled voice sounded from the surround trees yet the cloaked figure made no noise as he jumped down from the tree line.

He tensed as Wonder Girl whipped around to face him, holding up his hands in a placetating gesture he spoke again.

“There's fruit in the trees we can give this to Kidflash, there's no need to do.. That.”

Wonder Girl

Wonder Girl looked at him calculatingly.

“Why do you care what I give to Kidflash?”

Robin

The white lenses of his mask twitched quick and small, unnoticed by an untrained eye. He was silent for a long time.

“There's no reason to kill a bird if we can pick fruit.”

Wonder Girl

Her stare remained cool but curiosity was obviously creeping in.

“Why wouldn’t you kill the bird?”

Something flashed in her gaze that set Robin on edge.

Robin

“Unprovoked violence is senseless and corrupt.”

This time Robin answered quickly, and although he was just a smudge of dark against the treeline Wonder Girl still felt him sizing her up.

A silence settled over them, thick and weary but in the moment the two could trust one another not to attack.

Robin

“We’re gonna need a lot more food if we wanna keep Kidflash alive. The fruit is in the higher rings of the trees,”

He looked over his shoulder at her,

“You’re an amazon you should be pretty good at climbing right?”

Robin then pulled himself up into the trees.

Wonder Girl

A look of horror overcame her face.

#dick grayson #wally west #roy harper #donna troy #garth #teen titans!fab five #writing is hard

[vasiliassuns]

thistle gimme the tea on ruby

♥ oh gods, you really just love getting me on the analysis trains, hm ?

♥ ( note ; do not read this post if you absolutely love ruby with all of your heart and believe she is 100% innocent , to each their own , these are just my own personal opinions and im not trying to offend anybody ) 

♥ warning ! this post is very long, and essentially turned into a character analysis of specific moments and nearly an entire volume largely based off of how i see the show. it is multiple paragraphs long, standing at exactly 3444 words exactly. there will be a tl;dr at the end for anybody who doesnt want to read the full post, or has trouble focusing ! thank you for understanding. 

-----------------------

♥ where do i start ? personally, ruby’s character really got it’s worst in volume 7. i really enjoyed her character pre - fall of beacon, and a decent amount in volumes 4 - 6 as well. there is a moment in volume 4 that make me let out a long sigh, as well as a singular moment in volume 5 that greatly confuses me on her character, so i will touch up on that as well.

♥ volume 7 is what kills my love for her character, in all honest, as well as some moments in volume 6 that i feel could have been written better. i’ll go in chronological order for this, starting with my “:///” towards a part in volume 4, then confusion of a scene in volume 5, then the slight issues that developed with her in volume 6, then moving on to volume 7 and how im no longer really enjoying her character

♥ so, in volume 4, its very common knowledge that tyrian was sent to attack and retrieve ruby to bring back to salem, due to her having silver eyes and the damage she cause salems fall maiden. when qrow shows up to save ruby at the perfect last second, he adamantly tells her and the rest of team rnjr to stay out of the fight. at first, ren and nora dont listen, but then do, which is fair. but ruby continued to push her helping qrow. as we all know now, qrow was telling her to stay back due to his semblance. while, yes, ruby did help qrow against tyrian with a couple of the blows, the fight would have gone much different should she have not interfered (personally, i feel like qrow would have had a shot at beating tyrian, especially because their auras were both flickering and they seemed very evenly matched). but due to her constant interference, she nearly got knocked out by a large wooden beam, had qrow not sliced it in half. she wound up (even if it was accidentally) distracting qrow, giving tyrian the opportunity to nearly poison him. i dont hate her for wanting to help in this scene, because its her uncle who she cares about, but i feel like she also should have trusted qrow and stayed out of the fight. the line “this is my fight too” also gets me. maam, this isnt your fight, the fight is about you, but doesnt need to physically involve you.

♥ with volume 5. its a very well known scene, at least in my opinion. when weiss got impaled by none other than cinder fucking fall. within the few episode long battle for haven, we did see ruby’s eyes activate once when jaune and cinder were running / flying at each other to fight. i do understand why her eyes activated there, because jaune is her first friend from beacon that wasn’t her sister, arguably one of her closest. what i dont understand is why ruby’s eyes didnt activate when she saw that cinder had impaled weiss with the spear, weiss sitting in the same position ruby last saw pyrrha in, weiss an inch from death. it just doesnt add up to me how her teammate and partner, somebody who’s saved her multiple times and shes saved multiple times. it may be that she was too stressed in the moment for them to properly activate, which we’ve seen ( in volume 7 ), but i still feel like something should have happened with her eyes. 

♥ continuing on with volume 6, i really didnt have many issues with her character here either, but a few of her lines / moments kinda made me go “:/ bruh why tho” closer to the end of this volume. it’s really only two quotes of her’s that get me, which is “Just because you don't have an idea, doesn't mean we're out of options! Oz hasn't been here to tell us what to do, but we still managed to get this far anyway. We've been in bad situations before, and we don't need an adult to come save us or tell us what to do. We just did it our way! And I say we do it our way. And if you think you can keep up with us "kids"... we'd be happy to have you.” from the episode ‘lost’. i partially understand what she’s saying here, but at the same time, she says this to qrow, who saved her life on multiple occasions, and who wanted to get to atlas without breaking any laws. the way she said it (nothing against lindsay, she is an amazing and very talented voice actress, and she delivers nearly all of rubys lines perfectly, but imagine as if this was a real person we knew), kind of seemed decently rude to me. i understand that she knows they need to get to atlas, because james can help them (ill bring this back up later, trust me), and shes clearly not afraid to break the law that involves james’ military to get to him. 

♥ the second thing in volume 6 about ruby that semi-upsets me / makes me go “:/” is in the episode seeing red, when she was talking to cordovin, she said “ We're going to Atlas. Bigger people than you have tried to stop us and failed, but we're supposed to be on the same side! We're supposed to use our power to protect people, but you just use yours to look down on everyone! We didn't want to steal from you. We did it because you gave us no other choice! Now I'm giving you one last chance to stand down and hear us out.” this semi-upsets me mostly because of the line “bigger people than you have tried to stop us and failed”, as well as “we did it because you gave us no other choice.”. the “bigger people than you” gets me because while, yes, in the grand scheme of things within the war against salem, cordovin is a small footnote within it, the only other people who physically tried to stop team rwby was roman (who sadly was eaten by grimm due to his negative emotions with flocks of grimm around, not because of ruby), cinder’s miniature faction (who only partially failed. as much as i hate cinders character, she didnt fully fail in stopping rwby, she just was forced to step back for a while...multiple times.), and tyrian with rnjr. roman didnt inherently fail, he just chose to walk away from the fights hed been having with team rwby in order to devise a new plan to beat them the next time. cinder’s faction only partially failed because ruby managed to get on top of beacon tower in volume 3 with weiss’ help, watching pyrrha pass away thus activating her silver eyes for the first time. the only reason tyrian failed to stop rnjr was because qrow was there to help, and ruby managed to get an opening to slice his tail in half (which. ew that shot looked disgusting). yes, bigger people have tried to stop her and her friends, but they didnt inherently fail, at least not yet. with the line “we did it because you gave no other choice!” mostly just confuses me. while yes, technically cordovin didnt really give any options for the group, it didnt automatically mean that they had to instantly resort to stealing from the military. 

♥ now ! onto volume 7, where my salt really starts. because i have a growing icky feeling about her character in volume 7, im going to split this next bit up into three parts. the first part being the first 4 episodes, the second being episodes 5-9 and the third and final being episodes 10-13. buckle up!

♥ episode 1, i really have nothing against ruby. she has the same attitude she did in volume 6 and before, which is a mixture of pure but also wanting to stop salem.

♥ its episode 2 that starts to get me. as i mentioned earlier, ruby knows they have to get to atlas because they know james can help them, and that the lamp is safer if its locked away in the vault, but then she suddenly doesnt trust james. i dont know if this is because the ace-operatives arresting them, but in that situation, james also couldnt have known who the unlicensed huntsmen were. as seen by his and winter’s reactions to the soliders bringing rwby+jnr+oscar & qrow in, they instantly tell them to let the 9 go, because james and winter personally know them and know they would never attack people. so, i dont really know why ruby would stop trusting the idea that james could help them because of that. it may also be the fact that ruby doesnt like the idea that james was planning on telling the people of atlas and mantle about salem (which, honestly? to me? this decision seems fully rash and makes a lot of sense.), but even then, if the students at the vytal festival knew about salem, or the world did, it may have proven to be more beneficial to them, because the more people that knew she existed, the more people who can fight her or the more people that can support those who are fighting her on the front lines, so ruby no longer trusting him over that doesnt make sense to me either. ruby’s sudden distrust of james upsets me quite a bit, because she and the team shed been traveling with had learned ozpin was hiding things from them (my feelings on this is a whole different post, but not necessarily a negative one), and was very upset about that. really, her openly lying to james about not knowing why ozpin had disappeared / locked himself away in oscars mind, as well as the amount of questions jinn has left, really ticks me off. they spent the entirety of volume 6 trying to get to atlas and to james because they needed his help, and once they finally got there, in front of the man himself, she lied. she became the exact same thing that she and her group had openly not liked what so ever, which was a blatant liar. id understand if ruby said that jinn had one more question left, to see how james would react, and tell him of salem’s immortality at a slightly later date, when they got into the rhythm of being around each other and working as a team against salem, but just blatantly lying, without consulting her team prior, to the man who could in all honesty make or break how they fought this war, was plain wrong.

♥ in episode 3, ruby was mostly back to who she had been prior to this entire mess. she explains why theyre hiding stuff from james, albeit in the vaguest way possible (weiss and blake explain the thinking behind it more than she does, honestly). we also see the beginning of a conversation between ruby and oscar about them lying to james. though, with the lying situation and who she was turning into, this is really all for this episode.

♥ in episode 4, the largest scene we see with ruby openly talking about her distrust for james is her conversation with qrow. she says “I'm trying to do what I think is best, but I really can't tell if what's best is what's right. Or if I'm no different from Oz.“, which at this point, shes nothing like ozpin. shes worse. ozpin was hiding the truth about salem due to the trauma connected to her and the fact of her immortality that the ozma line of reincarnations had, which isnt entirely a bad thing. should he have tried to find a way to tell them she was immortal without disclosing his own personal traumas? absolutely, i dont disagree that he hadnt made brash decisions, that should have been made differently, but the sad truth is, is that ozpin chose to hide what he hid, but that one mistake (albeit, a large one) doesnt entirely make him a terrible person. ruby, however? her choice on telling james wasnt brash, it was blatantly impetuous. she barely thought and decided to lie on the spot, unless shed purposefully been internally planning for a long while to lie to him, and had a lie stored up to use should he have asked. that isnt okay, what so ever. the conversation ruby had with qrow eventually delvs into talking about summer, which isnt really important.

♥ when thinking about episodes 5 through 8, nothing particularly stands out to me as ruby blatantly lying. those episodes are mostly team rwby and jnr doing huntsman work, yang making a terrible decision and making blake talk for her, and r/enora turning into something i honestly really hate. episode 9 however, gets me thinking.

♥ in episode 9, the finally tell james that salem cant be killed, but ruby doesnt tell james, oscar does. a quick side note, i really like the fact that crwby had oscar tell james and not ruby, because oscar is the current (and hopefully final) reincarnation of ozma, and its a secret his past lives kept for a millennia. but! back to ruby. within this episode, before she decides they can finally tell james about salem (which, as you can tell, i believe they should have done instantly), ruby is preaching to james about how they can figure it out and that how they should all work together. this pisses me off because shes standing there, hiding one of the largest, if not the largest secret in the show, to a man who has done everything for her and her team. james trusted rwby, especially ruby, with everything he knew, gave them new weapons, clothes, a place to stay, food, etc. all for free because he trusted they wouldnt hide anything from them. another thing that gets me about ruby saying it was finally time to tell james, was that it seemed solely up to her to tell him or to chose when to tell him. it was up to the technically youngest in the group to chose when to tell james about salems immortality (i say technically, because oscar is the current reincarnation of a millennia old line, and i personally have seen him be wiser than ruby in this, weather hes more mature than her or not. physically, yes, oscar is the youngest. mentally? i really dont think hes the youngest in that regard). it doesnt make sense to me as to why everybody was trusting ruby with when to tell james. why wouldnt qrow tell him? qrows known james for years, weather they were close friends (that hug and sincerity tells me that they arent the bickering work partners v3 shaped them up to be) or not. qrow knows he can trust james because simply of how long theyve known each other. weiss knows she can trust james, hes been seen multiple times in the show defending her against jacques, even offering her a place at atlas academy (that bit to me seemed like james offering weiss a way to get away from jacques, because she would need to live at atlas to properly be a student, not the manor), he even said “shes the only one making any sense around here” after weiss got rightfully upset at the woman talking beacon down in volume 4. oscar knows he can trust james, simply because of his connection to ozpin. seeing as ozpin can access oscars memories, and its cannon that their memories merge, its safe to say that oscar was able to see who james used to be pre-fall of beacon, and to see the kind of man he was, as well as making his own judgement based on their first introduction together. so, why would these three, and the rest of the team traveling with ruby not tell james the truth? hell, qrow is a mother fucking spy. im pretty sure he would be able to tear james apart and figure out his intentions pretty easily. why couldnt qrow have just had a one on one conversation with james to make his own final call, as the fully fledged adult of the group? it doesnt make sense to me why they would trust ruby with this extremely important decision what so ever. 

♥ episode 10, there really isnt anything i have against ruby. shes fighting to protect mantle and is doing her current job, which is one of the few details i can appreciate, but thats about it. 

♥ episode 11 and 12 specifically piss me off, and not just about ruby, about nearly everybody involved. i understand rubys standing in this, saying that they need to stand their ground and fight salem head on, unlike they had in the past, i honestly probably would have said the same thing if i were her too. james had emotionally shut down at this point, i think that this is very clearly evident, especially seeing as the white sparkles in his eyes have dissipated, something we commonly see in the eyes of rwby characters to represent their humanity or emotional status. james is emotionally shut down, the ace-operatives have their own opinions on this situation which is entirely okay and valid, and they happen to be siding with james. blake is trying to take the calmer approach, most likely having noticed that if they lashed out like yang began to, it would go very bad very quick. weiss was in a state of semi-shock, her mind most likely naturally connecting their current situation with trauma and abuse she endured as a child (most prominently ; isolation). but how ruby handled going against james and the fight against the ace-operatives / specifically harriet, was down right wrong. she should not have jumped past james with her semblance to reveal james’ plan, which automatically escalated the situation from bad to even fucking worse. she yet again made a decision for herself and a group of people that can cost them their lives if things dont go their way (which, knowing how this show can be written sometimes? it will always go their way in the end), without thinking. i really dont feel i have to explain how spontaneous her choice on this is, especially because i know multiple people have covered it in better written posts. it essentially boils down to rubys blatantly reckless actions and absolutely moronic choices to do what they did. do not get me started on her line of “then you trained us” or the fact that all the ace-operatives walked into that fight with less aura than team rwby, which already gave them an unfair advantage. i really do not have the patience to fully type out and explain why i hate these two episodes with my entire being, but it mostly boils down to: nobody in this situation is right. not ream rwby, not james, not the ace-ops, very clearly not salem and her lackeys, not qrow choosing to fight 1v1v1, or cinder for a multitude of reasons. the only characters in these episodes i dont have a burning hatred for, be it temporarily or a fire i have a feeling will be burning for a while, is team jnr and oscar. they were trying their best in regards of what was best for everybody, oscar wanting to help james to the best of his ability. 

♥  tl;dr : basically? ruby rose in volumes 1 - 6 was actually a really enjoyable character and only had a few moments of “okay but why?” but everybody also has those moments. ruby rose in volume 7 turned into a hypocritical, blatantly rude and whiny little girl who i honestly cant really see as a good character at the moment at all, because of how she acted the entire volume. 

#thistle.exe ; analysis #rwby analysis #rwby v4 #rwby v5 #rwby v6 #rwby v7 #technically rwde #im not going to tag any character names #id rather not put an entire analysis in those tags because thats not fair to the people looking for content of a character they really like #this took me literal hours to write #it was worth it

[neokollection]

Kissing Out of Jealousy

NCT U + Yuta

‘Can I request a NCT U kissing you out of jealousy?’

A/N: I’m sure there’s already a reaction of this, but I’m here to add another :^) This is assuming you’re dating for some members, but for some you’re not dating, they like you- THIS IS LONG BTW!! [Kinda more like a mini drabble per each member]

** Language, some suggestive themes, but nothing explicit ** ik some ppl don't find jealousy cute so don't read if you not into that..

Taeil:

Taeil wasn’t the type to get jealous easily or behave pettily- Rather, he was just protective at times and would feel he’d have to interject to save you from situations... Whether you were feeling uncomfortable or not- Yet a part of your boyfriend also felt slightly neglected, a faithful dog waiting on the other side of the fence with it’s tail wagging at the sight of it’s owner, even though it’s owner was petting the neighbor’s cat.

He called out your name in the hopes of getting your attention as he watched you and Ten staring at your screens before nudging each other continuously with a laugh to show the other a recent entertaining Tweet. He was all for you bonding with the other boys, but he’d missed you this week and throughout the day constantly stuck by your side. Placing the bowl of steaming popcorn upon the coffee table, he took his seat beside you on the couch, hand patting around for the remote he’d dropped there moments before.

“OMG- You have to show that to Mark,” Ten gasped, covering his mouth to conceal his wicked grin as he looked at the meme you’d stumbled upon of Mark’s shorts.

“Let me see,” Taeil added, not wanting to miss out and curious as to what was so funny.

He leant in, eyes flickering to Ten as he watched the younger lean back into the couch, thumbs moving rapidly upon his screen. Taeil listened amusedly as he heard your small chuckle in his ear, a smile gracing his lips as he saw your screen before drawing back partially.

“You’re amused so easily,” he chuckled, nose nearly brushing your own as he leant nearer, a hand shooting to your waist to tickle you gently.

“Says you,” you squirmed with a bright smile.

Finally, his forehead rest upon your own, his antics stilling as he closed the gap between the two of you for a quick kiss. Embarrassed about kissing so openly with Ten by your side, you felt a blush creep upon your cheeks as you pulled away shyly. You could have sworn Taeil’s gaze jumped from your lips to your eyes to Ten before he closed the gap once more- You let out a muffled chuckle against his lips as your hands went to the front of his shirt to slow him down and steady yourself.

“Ew- God- Could you not?” Ten whined in disapproval, scooting away.

You could feel Taeil’s smile against your lips before he drew back, eyes as lively as ever.

Smothering you and being that cute couple to show off and make others wanna gag, but not let you think it’s a jealousy thing-

Taeyong:

Easily, one of the most jealous man you’d ever dated. He had his share of insecurities that make him question whether he’s worthy of love and attention, and an anxiety about losing the person he cherishes the most... So, seeing your interactions with your old classmates made him feel even more insecure in the moment. He’d had a stressful and busy week and hadn’t gotten to see you much, merely late calls that usually didn’t last long because he’d coax you to go to sleep early since you’re busy as well. Meeting a few of your old high school classmates, totally coincidentally at Gong Cha was all it took for him to have a small internal freak out. He already didn’t like that they were guys, even more so that they’d known you longer than he had technically... He felt excluded- He always wanted to be a part of every part of your life and have you in every part of his- To him your soulmates and he didn’t like feeling as though someone had a leg up on him in regards to you.

“You look great! Wow- It’s been a minute, but wow-” one of your old classmates gushed, stunned by how you’d matured and glowed up through the years spent apart.

You gave a small chuckle in return, “I’m surprised you recognized me-”

“I mean how could I forget (Y/n)?” he joked, gesturing towards you, followed by a few hums of the other classmates beside him.

You weren’t exactly sure what he meant by that- You didn’t think of yourself as too memorable of a person during high school. You’re boyfriend disliked it even more, a scowl etched into his features- He didn’t like not being in the know or what exactly the man meant.

“Well, it’s a small world I guess,” you wrapped up awkwardly, “It was nice to see you,” you added, able to feel Taeyong’s calculating gaze.

Sighing to yourself, you took a sip of your tea, inviting Taeyong to ask whatever he was going to ask.

“Were you popular in high school?”

“No,” you huffed, “Not really anyway- I’ve already told you about my high school- I wasn’t even friends with those guys... I can’t believe he recognized me.”

‘You’re just too pretty to be forgettable’ was what Taeyong had been thinking, but decided to keep it in. He could still feel their fleeting gazes glancing towards you as they sat down in laughter- He didn’t like that... What were they talking about? You? Were they laughing about you? Who knew what prude remarks they were making.

“I’d have dated her back in junior year if I knew she was gonna turn out like this-”

Feeling jealous, protective, and anxious he stood, causing you to look up at him, “Where are you going..?”

“Bathroom,” he informed before bending down, his hand coming to cradle your jaw as he sealed your lips together in a sweet kiss- Lips tasting of caramel.

Your lips followed his own as he drew back, swiping his thumb endearingly across your cheek before giving it a gentle pinch. You pulled your face from his grasp at the action, playfully pouting at your cup of tea as he left the table.

“I know right-”

The voices got louder as he approached.

“Could you keep your voices down?” he asked, yet it wasn’t really a question- His tone and gaze icy and curt before he brushed past their table to the restroom.

Yuta:

Tossing in jealous Yuta because that’s hot-

You didn’t have to be dating Nakamoto Yuta for him to feel as strongly as he did. He felt like you were already his, his sweet, his dear, his precious- And he wasn’t going to let the world or anyone else take that away from him. You loved him as a friend- The two of you had crossed the boundary of friendship a few times with late night kisses and drunken texts- But there was something about his possessive nature that made you hesitant to progress any further with him. Just being his friend you felt like a prisoner-

“I have to drop by my brothers’ dorm to give him back his battery pack-” you began, halting as you remembered.

“I’ll go with you,” Yuta chimed, slinging an arm around your shoulder, pulling you into him as his other hand pulled the drawstrings of the hoodie harshly, causing it to close around your face.

You stumbled into him mid-step as he did so, whining dramatically as your hands attempted to shove him aside.

“My brother doesn’t like you,” you interjected, pulling the hood free from your mess of hair as Yuta released you.

With a shrug he focused his attention on taming your hair, the action causing your face to heat.

“You shouldn’t go into the boys dorm alone,” he reprimanded, motherly as ever.

Jaehyun. Your brother’s roommate and soccer teammate of Yuta- was coming down the very path you were on the quad.

“Jaehyun!” you called out suddenly, happy to find a delivery man.

His eyes darted from his phone to you, his brows knitting together seconds later-

“Hey,” he began, slowly letting his gaze drift between the two of you before to your hoodie.

“Uh... Is that your hoodie?”

“I stole it from my brother- Don’t tell,” you chuckled.

Letting out a soft chuckle of amusement, Jaehyun shook his head, “That’s not your brother’s- That’s mine. I’d been looking for it all week-”

“Oh my God!” you gasped, dropping the tote bag from your shoulder, “I’m so sorry! I- It was on his side of the room... So I thought-”

“It’s fine,” he interjected, “It looks good on you-”

Yuta’s gaze narrowed at that remark and before he even had a moment to stop you, you were peeling off the hoodie and offering it to an astonished Jaehyun. You saw no issue with it, you were wearing a t-shirt underneath.

“I’m so so sorry! Also...” you began, picking up your bag, “Could you give this to my brother?”

“Sure-” Jaehyun nodded, scratching the nape of his neck as you pushed the goods into his hands before whipping around and grabbing the side of Yuta’s plaid jacket to bring him in tow with you-

“O my God... That was so embarrassing-” you rambled, feeling your face hot in embarrassment.

Suddenly, Yuta’s feet stopped moving, causing you to stop. He removed his phone from the pocket of his jacket before slipping it into his jeans, removing his coat.

“What are you doing?” you asked dumbly before catching on, “N-No, I’m not cold or anything-”

Silently, he draped it over your shoulders before his hands slid to the open front of it, grasping it before pulling you closer by the collar. His lips melded with your own, needy and passionate, jealousy brewing in his heart at even a simple encounter. His hands slid down to the zipper, zipping it quickly as he pulled away, your arms constricted, a smug expression on his face before he began walking again.

“H-Hey! GET THIS off me!” empty sleeves flopping by your sides as you hobbled after him.

The type to give you a little taste of his cold shoulder and reprimanding you for being careless [about making him jealous basically].

Kun:

Respectful and mature bub who wouldn’t do anything unless the two of you were dating, and for a while.

He couldn’t understand why Xioajun was so clingy towards you- I mean... He understood it in a sense since he was also in a way- But it was different. You were taken- Xiaojun should have taken a hint from him by now. Kun was constantly swooping in to interrupt the too of you, the hint of a small grin gracing his features each time to hide his unkindly thoughts towards the younger.

“Does Xiaojun bother you?” he questioned, watching as you pulled on your socks from the doorway of your bedroom, his shoulder resting against the frame.

“No?”

Cocking your head to the side, you couldn’t understand what Kun was hinting at or why he was asking.

“He’s always around you...”

“Yeah,” you chuckled, “We’re friends.”

You stood, ready to pass by your boyfriend and slip on your shoes by the doorway, yet he didn’t budge.

“Well...” he began, “I don’t want to sound ...clingy, but I don’t like it-”

“There’s nothing to worr-”

You were mid-roll of your eyes, when he cut you off, his warm hand enveloping around your own, “You’re mine, right?”

There was a hint of something swimming in his chocolate gaze, as if a saddened part of him needed reassurance.

“O-Of course,” you admitted, blushing to yourself from feeling caught off guard.

“Then I have a right to be like this,” he added, voice softer.

You open and shut your mouth dumbly, not sure what to say in response. Yes? He to a degree had a right to feel jealous- But... There was really no reason to be jealous over Xiaojun- Tugging your hand forward gently, he drew you to meet his lips, lilting his neck down. His kiss was delicate, lips plush and substantial, but movements gentle and loving. Your knees felt weak, as if it was your first kiss again.

“Don’t worry about it,” you nearly whispered as he drew back, “I’ll try to be mindful,” you added, referring to distancing yourself a bit so Kun wouldn’t get the wrong impression again.

“We’re going to be late...”

Doyoung:

You drew back to take a breath before your lips were smothered again, his nostrils flaring in anger and also the need for oxygen. You whined gently against his lips, attempting to pull back once more. You panted, out of breath before placing a hand on Doyoung’s chest to keep him at bay.

He leant back over the center console, resting his head back against the padded seat. Finished clicking in your seat belt you looked at him.

“When you dress like that,” he began, nodding forward, “guys get the wrong idea.”

“N-”

“Like thinking you’re single and something for them to ogle at,” he added, cutting you off, “You have no idea what kind of sleaze bags were looking at you and what they were thinking-”

His fox-like eyes flickered back to you, taking a moment to glance at the obvious cleavage you’d put on display.

“I dressed up for you- I just… I wanted to feel sexy and make you-”

“Make me what? Upset?”

“No! Proud to be with me- To be attractive to you…”

Raking a hand through his hair he let his gaze fall upon your own.

“Don’t you get it?” he began, jabbing the keys into the ignition, “You’re always attractive to me- I always want you- I’m always proud of you- But I want to be the only one to see.. You don’t deserve them looking at you like that and it makes me sick,” he trailed off, quickly casting his gaze forward as he pulled away from the curb.

You felt a tingle jolt along your spine at his words.

Ten:

He’d been giving you a snarky attitude all day; curt remarks and dismissive glances. Sighing for the final time as he pretended to ignore you, you let your tongue poke at your cheek in annoyance.

“Look at me,” you probed.

His fingers halted before smashing the pause button on his game, tossing the controller aside him on the sofa as he let out his own sigh, his gaze continuing to be fixed upon the TV screen.

“Why are you being like this?”

You hated how beautiful his profile was, the slope of his sharp nose and outline of his soft lips.

“Why won’t you even talk to me?” you added, raising your tone.

“If you want someone to talk to why don’t you ask Taeyong?” he quipped, voice laced with venom.

Huffing in exasperation, you let your hands fall to your hips.

“Are you serious?”

Finally… he turned his dark gaze towards you.

“Yeah,” he nearly shrugged, attitude as petty as ever.

“You’re such a child!” you shouted, unable to control your emotions as you stormed away, frustrated and wanting to cry.

He paused for a moment before standing.

“I’m childish?” he asked, tone brazen and perplexed.

You stopped, turning on your heel-

“Then what?” he questioned, “Is Taeyong the man?”

Before you could spit out a reply he grabbed onto your elbow.

“I’m the only man you should see,” he barked.

“You are my only man…” you murmured, hurt he thought otherwise.

Cupping your face, he pulled you into him, lips messily finding one other before passionately embracing.

Omg I hate this one…

Jaehyun:

Far enough. Was what Jaehyun had been thinking.

His jaw was set, his lips pursing each time his eyes narrowed slightly, causing one of his dimples to gently show.

Sure, it was Taeyong’s birthday, but that didn’t mean he had the right to flirt with you-

“Is that right?” you giggled, after listening to one of Taeyong’s stories.

Your fork idly toyed with the pasta in your dish as you gave Taeyong your attention. The rest of the lunch table seemed chatty, side for Jaehyun whom pouted by your side. His silence was slowly steeling your attention away from Taeyong as you began to worry.

“You’ll have to excuse me for a moment,” you interjected, glancing towards the bathroom.

Your plan was simple, take a break from Taeyong by using the restroom before retuning and turning to Jae to give your attention and ask what was up. As you stood Johnny began speaking to Taeyong, allowing you the perfect cover to escape. As you did, someone snagged you by your belt loop. Your forlorn boyfriend looking up at you with eyes you couldn’t place.

“Where are you going?”

“Bathroom,” you whispered, your brows furrowing in concern at his oddness.

He released you, standing himself to follow you.

“Why are you being so weird?” you inquired, rounding a corner with him.

“I’m jealous,” he admitted.

“Wh- How? What’s there to be jealous about?” you stumbled.

Instead of answering or explaining, he cornered you against the wall once the two of you were hidden from sight in the hall of the bathroom.

“Babe,” you began, your voice lowering.

Being under his gaze in such close quarters you felt trapped, trying to think of what he’d want to hear to be reassured. You bit your lip in thought. Warm lips clashed with your own, not too aggressive, nor gently. The breath that had gotten caught in your throat came out as a sigh against his lips as his hands slid from the wall on either side of your shoulders to your hips.

“We can’t do this here,” you nearly whispered, your lips brushing his own in temptation.

Ignoring you, his hasty lips met yours again, causing you to let out a small moan of protest.

“Oh- God-” Ten sputtered, shielding his eyes from the entrance of the hallway as he saw the two of you.

Your fist came in contact with Jae’s pec as he broke away from you.

...When you came back to the table you could feel everyone’s gaze upon the two of you, lowering your gaze in embarrassment as Jaehyun wore a smug grin.

Win:

Cold shoulders were never fun, especially when dealing with your best friend Sicheng. He sat several rows in front of you in the lecture hall instead of beside you, scrolling through his phone and clearly avoiding your texts. You bit your pen cap in annoyance as you stared at the back of his head.

“Maybe they broke up-”

It was a hushed whisper, but you were able to here it.

“Just go talk to her-”

Evidently Sicheng heard it too, his thumb having stopped scrolling and his ears perked.

“Hey,” a gentle voice said, taking the seat beside you.

“H-Hi,” you fumbled, baffled as to why Mark Lee was sitting next to you.

“This seat’s not taken, is it?”

“No,” you enunciated, making sure it was clearly loud enough for Sicheng to hear in an attempt to be petty.

“Cool- Well, uh, there’s this party at Alpha Delta Si later,” he began, “If you wanted to go, you could be my plus one- Honestly, we’ve had this class together all semester and I thought you were cute-”

You were flattered by his invitation, but frat parties weren’t really your scene.

Glancing over his shoulder at the encounter, Sicheng was caught by your gaze.

“Oh- Uh, I’ll have to think about it, parties like that aren’t really my thing-” you declined politely.

“O-Oh,” Mark nodded, retracting to his seat in thought as the professor entered.

The entire lesson you and Sicheng fumed with thoughts of each other, unable to concentrate. The lesson seemed to end in record time, not that you were paying attention.

“So, um, if parties aren’t your thing we could do something like uh... get ice cream, or-”

Once you’d stood to stuff your belongings in your bag, Mark was back at it again. However, your sleeve was yanked by the ever so thoughtful Sicheng, pulling you from the row and tugging you up the stairs of the lecture hall. You stumbled after him dumbly until he shoved the door open with such force you were scared for a moment.

“Stop-” you shot, pulling from his grip.

“Was I interrupting something?” he asked bitterly.

“What the fuck is your problem? I thought you-”

You could feel the gaze of several classmates in the hallway, feeling embarrassed. Behind you, Sicheng saw the door of the lecture hall swing open with none other than Mark and Jeno, his eyes narrowing as he caught Mark’s gaze. Swooping in, his hand clamped over your forearm to pull you to meet his lips, his blunt nails digging into your sweater. He was overwhelming, figure looming over your own, hasty lips pushing against your own, you felt lost in your shock.

Jungwoo:

“Let me up,” you huffed for what felt like the fifth time.

A hum of disapproval left the boy who’d constricted himself around you.

“Woo- I’ll be late for my shift...” you tried, sighing to yourself.

“Don’t go,” he murmured.

“I have to go- My supervisor will be mad if I’m late again...”

“Your supervisor,” he began, sitting up, his fluff of hair bouncing, unfit of his narrowing eyes, “I don’t like him.”

“It doesn’t matter if you like him or not-”

You struggled in his hold, but he draped a leg over your hips to bar your escape, hugging you closer.

“He’s creepy.”

“Yeah, he is,” you agreed with an airy chuckle, “But that doesn’t matter, I need to keep my wage-”

Rolling on top of you, you let out a whine under his weight. Cutely, he blew the hair out of your face, not daring to remove his hands from wrapped around you for fear of you escaping. You giggled and writhed at his actions, shaking the hair from your face. He plopped a soft kiss upon your lips, smothering your own before drawing back momentarily.

“Don’t go.”

His lips didn’t give yours time to spit out a retort, softly melding with yours with passion. Had it been any other day or any other occasion, you would have skipped whatever event there was to stay with him, but you couldn’t miss today... Shaking your head to shake his lips off your own, he groaned against your lips, unrelenting. You couldn’t help but let out a chuckle of anguish against his lips, following it with a low whine. He bit your lip in retaliation gently, shifting on top of you as you squealed and wiggled beneath him.

“You’re being childish,” you gasped, nostrils flaring with the need for air.

Lucas:

“Baby-”

Yukhei’s deep voice reverberated through your being as his lips brushed your ear.

“Why are you watching that?”

In your defense, you hadn’t searched for it, rather it was in your suggestions and you just so happened to be curious by the amount of views it had. A Doyoung, Boss focus cam- Nor were you expecting your friend-with-benefits to be up so early... He usually slept well past ten.

“I couldn’t sleep,” you partially lied.

“Do you like him?”

“Uh,” you stalled, glancing over your bare shoulder, “It’s not like I know him-”

“I mean,” he corrected, “Do you think he’s sexy?”

Your expression morphed into one of confusion at his most likely horny what-the-fuckery.  If you said yes would he set up a threesome?

“Yeah.”

A warm hand slid over your bare arm, trailing to your shoulder before moving to your throat. He didn’t like that answer- Though the two of you weren’t official, he had real feelings for you- Which is why he called you baby, and told you to stay the night when you’d start searching for your clothes the night before...

“What about me?” he groaned gently.

Dropping your phone aside, you rolled over to your side, your hand going to his wrist to stop the growing pressure he applied.

“Yeah, you’re sexy,” you rolled your eyes, knowing he was immaturely jealous.

“Am I sexier?”

He drew you closer, his nose brushing against your own as he awaited your answer.

“I’m not sure,” you teased, withholding a giggled at how his eyes widened.

He let out a chuckle too, able to catch onto your teasing attitude.

“I must be since I’m the one with you and not him,” he muttered with a smile, rolling over on top.

His lips claimed your own in an arduously slow kiss, his hand fumbling to reach over and turn off your phone.

Mark:

Alone, in bed, on his phone- Mark’s evening was rather bland. He’d been on a call with you while you’d been getting ready to come over, content with just listening to your voice.

“Why do you take so long to get ready?” he questioned with a sigh, “Just come over already.”

“I have to look good,” you countered, “You said Johnny was home...”

And here it was, the recent reason for Mark’s despise of Johnny Suh, one of his closest friends.

“Bro- So what... You’re coming over to see me, not him-”

That was true-

“Yeah, but if I do see him-”

“Whatever, just hurry up,” Mark complained, his tone snappish as he hung up.

It was hard getting friend-zoned, let alone having the girl you like be into your best friend instead.

Fifteen minutes later you were checking your reflection on your phone before the door, collecting yourself before ringing the doorbell.

Answering it, Mark felt his heart clench- You looked ridiculously cute, glossy lips, curled lashes, slight wind-blown hair, and the oversized Puma hoodie you’ d bought last week to match your leggings. He wish you were getting all dolled up for him, causing a pang of jealousy to stab him.

“I’ll pay for delivery since you paid last time,” you remarked, stepping through the doorway to remove your shoes as your eyes searched for the giant of your affection.

Yet he was nowhere in sight... Making your way to Mark’s room with your bag, dropping it to his bed and plugging your phone into his charger. You heard the distinct sound of the refrigerator opening, bottles rattling- Perhaps it was Johnny. Turning on your heel, you planned upon seeing whom it was, but a Mark Lee was blocking your path, having just entered the threshold of his room.

“Lemme see,” you pried, your brows furrowing as he closed the door behind himself.

“It’s Taeil,” he lied, knowing what you were after.

You still wanted to check for yourself, even give the senior a greeting.

“Uh, let me through,” you paused as Mark remained in his spot.

“Why’s it always go to be about him?”

“I- What do you-”

“You know what I mean,” he interjected, raising his voice, “All of a sudden everything’s about him-”

“That’s not true,” you tried, folding your arms defensively.

“Yes it is,” he retorted, taking a step toward you, his bad attitude and mood nearly radiating off his figure, “We can’t even hang out like we used to because you’re always preoccupied with him-”

“I can’t help that I like him!” you shot back.

It took only another step and Mark was in front of you, his hands flying to grip your shoulders as his nose brushed yours for only a millisecond- You couldn’t contemplate what was taking place and before it registered, his lips were on your own, sticky lip gloss transferring.

#nct #nct imagine #nct reaction #nct scenario #nct angst #nct u #Yuta imagine #Yuta reaction #ten imagine #ten reaction #ten angst #Yuta angst #maybe??? #kun imagine #jealous nct #mark angst #jungwoo fluff #lucas angst #yukhei angst #jungwoo imagine #kungwoo scenario

[clown-bait]

Paranormal Journeys (Pt8) Tortured

Update time! When we last heard of the trashpire she was in a bit of a sticky situation a new face arrived on the scene and somehow she lost a finger. Pennywise is not happy about any of this. Especially because he had to get help from his nemesis. At this point you should just get a pet tracker for your girl Pen she seems to get herself into trouble way too often.

Oh right and some music to go along with this chapter:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHQUfgq1seM

----------

Ch 15 Tortured

“Well, well, well if it isn't my favorite bitch! You know I was going to send you some Frontline for christmas since the last time I walked by your house I got covered in fleas.” Leech grinned through the ichor leaking from her face as the alpha werewolf Danielle walked into the barn and backhanded her already bruised face.

“Still making dog jokes even though you're the one on a leash? Leech I knew you were obnoxious but this is just pathetic.”

“H-harder mommy.” Leech whimpered through the sting of the she-wolfs hand.

“ugh and still disgusting.”

“At least when it rains I don't smell like wet dog!” The vampire called out as her rival turned away to Zander who had grabbed her arm as she passed.

“Wait you know her?”

“Unfortunately. I also know that the creature she's dating is the creature you've been looking for Zander”

“You fucked Humperdink?!” Leech shouted from behind them. The she-wolf turned to her in confusion.

“What?”

“She's been referencing Princess Bride for hours now.” Chris sighed.

“It's a classic! I’ve been trying to get Penny to watch it with me forever now. He liked Labyrinth though so not all hope is lost.”

“Yeah back to *ahem* Penny. The clown that was in the house thats what killed your sister and whats more disgusting she's dating it.” Danielle pointed at Leech who was raising her eyebrows suggestively.

“She's what now?”

“Ok listen its more than just dating, we’re a mated imprinted pair! Like- uh shit how did he describe it…ducklings? Violent sexual ducklings!” Leech called out to them in annoyance. The group grimaced and turned back to ignore her.

“Well, thats a mental image I never needed.” Rick said while rubbing his temples. Danielle regained her composure after cringing at the thought of what the clown and his vampire got up to when they were alone.

“Look I'm not going to explain it but you can help me stop it, using her as bait.” she said to the group while Leech yelled in shock.

“Oh my god you absolute bitch!!” the nosferatu spat and struggled in her restraints.

“She's just as evil as the creature its self so don't feel bad about anything I'm about to suggest but were going to have to torture her a bit for information.”

Chris and Zander both nodded, Rick hesitated but agreed when he saw the others eagerness to work together on this one.

“I am so not evil…..wait no yeah, yeah I am.” Leech snarked at them once again. Whatever it was these humans thought they could do to her she's had worse.

“Get something sharp and silver. Vampires cant tolerate it.” the werewolf grinned. Leech's smile faded as she heard a mirror shatter.

“Ah fuck.”

The werewolf cautiously approached leech brandishing the silver mirror shard in one hand holy water in the other. “Tell us how to get to the clown.”

“You'll have to kill me.” the nosferatu spat.

“Splash her.”

Holy water sliced into Leech’s abused skin fizzing and bubbling like acid. The vampire cursed and whimpered. Then she laughed.

“M-more” she panted and was struck with the water again.  

“Let's try once more how do I find the clown?”

“Have you checked the circus?”

“You're not funny”

“And you snack on milk bones.”

“Hand me the crucifix.” the alpha said to Chris as Leech hollered out to the group.

“Don't believe me? Check her purse! I’ve totally seen some in there!”

The she-wolf pulled out a large cross from a sheet. The nosferatu smiled.

“Oh! We’re gonna get rough I see. Well, we all know I like it rough!” Leech’s sneer turned into a wail of pain as she was brought to the floor. The cross pushing her down via searing internal agony until the thing started to catch fire in Danielle’s hands.

“Th-that it?” the vampire panted and rolled onto her back.

“If you wont tell us how to find him well make him come to us” Danielle sighed putting the cross away. Her prey was as stubborn as she was annoying time for a different tactic.

“He's going to wipe you from existence when he finds out you betrayed him.” Leech snarled keeping her voice low so the humans couldn't hear her. “Why are you risking this?”

“For power. I kill you and put your clown back to sleep, then for 27 long years the town is ours to do with as we please.”

“Always knew you needed to be put down.” Leech muttered.

The blonde bared her teeth and plucked a pair of old rusted sheep sheers off the wall. She turned to Chris who had been wearily watching her since she had entered the barn. “Here make yourself useful.” she called to him holding out the clippers. The ghost hunter took the sheers and looked at the blonde woman and then over to the chained monster on the dusty barn floor.

“You know I don't have any hair right?” the vampire called out from the background.

The she-wolf rolled her eyes and turned to Zander. “Z this thing on the floor? She can lead the creature to us, the thing that killed your sister we have to use her to make sure justice is done.”

“IT would come for her?” the lead ghost hunter asked.

“Oh baby you have no idea!” Leech flashed the room a devilish smile still trying to taunt her captors.

“Ew.” Chris grimaced

“Yeah ok someone help me grab her at least we can shut her up” Zander pulled on Rick’s arm who moved to restrain the nosferatu. Leech raised her eyebrows in amusement as she was thrown to the floor and held down.

“Uh Z? What am I cutting off?” Chris asked

“Well, she doesn't have any hair…. maybe a piece of her shirt?”

Chris and Danielle both shot Zander a questioning look, then gave the same to the vampire when she started laughing from her spot on the floor.

“HA pussies! Like Pennywise would risk everything for a piece of fabric! You gotta cut off something I’d miss!”

“Why are you encouraging that??” The she-wolf shouted completely dumbfounded.

“Honestly? Cause your attempts at being evil here are pretty lame.”

“wh-“

“Plus the guy you gave those scissors to doesn't look like he has the balls to do it anyway.”

“well yeah you're talking about amputating something here!” Chris shouted.

“Just cut off her finger Chris.” Danielle rolled her eyes growing tired and impatient.

“Yeah Chris do it! Bet you’ll bitch out!” Leech yelled and taunted again.

“Chris wait we don't have to do this!” Zander could smell the potential lawsuit from here. His little revenge plot has gotten way out of hand. He had never really expected to find anything and when he did he had just sorta been winging it till he met Danielle in that bar.

“Humperdink is a pussy you gonna let a guy like that control your life? Cut off my finger” Leech shouted again.

“I-“

“Chris I'm your boss listen to me” Zander pleaded.

“I dont-“

“what are you waiting for be a man DO IT!” Danielle shouted this time.

“Z, I cant-“

“HA! I knew it!” Leech called out triumphantly as if she had just won some kind of prize. Zander continued to shout at his teammate while Danielle motioned the ghost hunter to proceed. The whole thing was a bit overwhelming for him to say the least.

Chris looked at Zander who was now shouting orders at him, the woman he chose to sleep with instead of him and the insane bald creature on the floor.

“This is some real half assed torture you've organized here Danielle I'm kinda embarrassed for you. Seriously you should brush up on your technique cause- FUCK” something behind Leech landed on the floor in a wet thud. “Holy shit I didn't think he'd actually do it…….” the vampire said in a small shocked voice as her breathing rapidly began to increase. The barn was silent in shock, for only a moment nothing but a few splatter noises of thick ichor falling for Leech’s hand. Then the vampire gasped and lurched forward before opening her mouth to scream.

————————————-

Over all the eons he had existed today had to be one of the top ten worst days of pennywise’s immortal life. the clown led his nemesis down the corridors of his sewer preferring to travel this way and to keep the existence of his- friends is too strong of a word…..associates he has been forced to live with. Yes much better! The existence of his associates hidden.

The group didn't seem too  troubled over his mates plight anyway. Which infuriated the clown even when he showed them her severed finger they rolled their eyes. If they only knew of her condition! At least two of them would actually be concerned!

“Soooo…” the human behind him began to speak. Pennywise let out a low clicking growl in annoyance

“What”

“Now that we have this…truce..I have a few-“

“You get three.”

“Can one of them be how to kill you?”

“No.”

“All right then when did you grow feelings?”

“I didn't grow feelings.”

“That’s not what i saw back at the house”

the clown bared his fangs. “Next question.”

“You cant give me three questions and then refuse to answer them.”

“The only reason you're alive right now sheep boy, is because your grandfather was clever enough to build his farm somewhere I can’t reach. Which way?”

“Left. Are you controlling her mind how did this start?”

Pennywise laughed at that. “You think I wanted this to happen? I was quite content till Leechie ruined my life. She came on to me.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“For all your snooping you sure don't know much. Humans, so moronic.” the clown grinned to himself. Mike chewed over the implications that someone could actually find this thing attractive enough to pursue it and even fall in love with it. Whoever or whatever Lucy Smith really was she must be sick in the head.

“What is she?”

Pennywise turned his head back and smirked as he walked. “Not human. Something much, much better.”

“Do you love her?”

The clown stopped cold. “That was three questions I'm not answering that.”

“You didn't answer it the first time. Do you love her?”

Pennywise stood still and silent. Mike couldn't see the clown’s ocean blue eyes or the slight quiver of his lip in the dark sewer tunnel but from the absolute stillness the librarian seemed to have his answer.

“We’re making another left.” Mike finally spoke up snapping Pennywise from his trance-like state. “I cant believe you of all people fell in love”

“Shut up Mikey.”

“Clearly she's had quite the effect on you.”

“I SAID THATS ENOUGH”

“The others aren't going to believe me when I tell them-“

Pennywise turned and roared in the librarians face. His fangs multiplying so much they no longer fit in his own mouth while his eyes bulged their alarming red and yellow. “NO! SHE STAYS OUT OF THIS” he practically spat bits of flesh into Mike’s eyes in his rage. It took a lot for the librarian to remain as calm as possible trying to remind himself that IT still needed his help and was desperate enough to broker a truce. He'd keep this bit of information for a later use, Pennywise may have a weakness after all.  As the clown turned back around still with those bulging glowing eyes lighting the sewer Mike sighed and boldly gave him one final jab to the ego.

“You definitely love her.”

“I hate your species so much” Pennywise mumbled and continued to blindly lead the way to the outer reaches of his territory.

——

They came to the end of the sewers greeted by the lush forest surrounding the town animals skittered away in fright at the sight of the creature that emerged from its domain squinting slightly in the light and sniffing the air.

“I don't smell her.” he snarled “Did you lie to me human?! I can find out yes I can! I’ll pluck out your eyes one by one and tear out your ears!” he sang and threatened the poor librarian who stood his ground and shook his head.

“No, I didn't lie. This is the back way to the farm a way only I know about.”

Penny snarled and huffed impatient and hungry from his walk. “Show me.”

“You have to promise”

“Yes, yes your life will be spared if she is unharmed.”

“No you have to promise not to kill anymore children.”

Penny bared his teeth at the librarian. He was close enough he could kill him now and search himself, it would take more time but he'd at least be rid of the little lighthouse keeper of those kids. The clown flexed his claws but paused when something crawled out of the river. A turtle hauled its self out onto a rock to dry in the last remaining beads of light in the setting sun something fluttered in the air around it landing on its shell and unfolding its pale wings. The moth sat on the reptile for a few moments before fluttering onto the clowns claw then out of his grasp forever off into the sky. A warning from his brother. Figures.

“This will not last.” Penny said at last.

“I didn't think it would. If it happens again, if you take a child I will call them back.”

“We have a deal then.” the clown grumbled. He was stuck between a rock and a hard place here. If Leech wasn't so vulnerable he could have said no and just gobbled his long time nemesis up but no. Things had to happen now at the cusp of everything important. He had little choice and he felt helpless and angry. For the first time he had something that made him happy other than food and his brother had to ruin his fun. First he’ll end the losers, then Maturin. He would see to it they all pay.

“Its just this way theres an entrance to the main barn through the cellar, I-I’d hide here when I was younger to get out of slaughterhouse work.”

“Couldn't take a life of a lamb could ya Mikey?” Penny sneered

“I raised them myself, its harder when they're your’s… but then again you wouldn't understand that would you.”

The clown snarled and let out a growl that was thick with offense. “I am learning.” was his answer as he pushed through the dusty wooden door. Mike chewed on the creatures words for a bit. What did that mean? The creature’s sense of urgency was starting to take on a much deeper meaning now as the librarian followed after him.

The cavern got darker and darker as they pushed forward Pennywise melting into the shadows despite his silver costume. Mike used a flashlight to keep track of the thing from his nightmares as it sniffed the dust filled air. Pennywise paused and inhaled deep a low gravely whine escaped his throat and he inhaled again as if the intoxicating scent was quelling an addiction.

“She's here.” he began “She's wounded.”

“Well, she is missing a finger.”

“Quiet human!” penny snapped and listened to the silent cellar.

His eyes flicked forward when he heard it. it was feint but ominous. Someone was singing and Penny knew the song well. She had been singing it non stop for a week now.  

Well you can't hold me

I'm too slippery

I do no sleeping

I get lonely

You can touch me

If you want to

I got poison

I just might bite you

Lie in circles

On the sunlight

Shine like diamonds

On a dark night

Ain't no mercy

In my smiling

Only fangs and

Sweet beguiling

Well the future he don't

Try to find me

Skin I been through

Dies behind me

Solid hollow

Wrapped in hatred

Not a drop of

Venom wasted

Well you can slip in

Try to find me

Hold your breath and

Flat deny me

It makes no difference

To my thinking

I'll be here when

You start sinking

The clowns posture relaxed in relief as he took in the siren call to him. He cocked his head to the side and grinned wide in the direction of the librarian who wasn't sure if it was wise to approach any further. Penny shut his eyes and sighed again.

“My Peachy.”

---------------------

Who’s ready for carnage! Cause shits about to get fucked up in the next chapter. Some graphic skin removal, playing 70s rock music on muscle tendons someone might even get shot in the face! How exciting! Oh and you know the reveal of whats been going on with our trashpire. That too.

#pennywise #pennywise x oc #monster roommate au #pennywise fanfiction #it fanfiction #mike hanlon #losers club #nosferatu oc #horror fanfiction #slasher fanfiction #leech really needs to learn how to shut up

[onewfantaesy]

It’s 2010 bitch!!!

written also with @spacetaemin, @5hineesback, @choitaemins and @sabakunocasali  (and probably many others)

“Minho shoot the ball” yelled super jock Kim Jonghyun as he ran down the footballl field. Minho, baseball in hand, hit the soccer ball so hard it become a touchdown. Everyone in the audience cheered but especially Taemin, long haired bb child innocent my son,,,doesn’t know a damn thing about anything. Evry1 thinks hes a girl but rly hes just feminine and cute and clueless!

Sitting next to Taemin was his best-friend-but-also-pseudo-mother, Kim Kibum, better known as “Key Umma.”

“I did it I got a homerun!!!” Choi Minho, the coolest jock in school, yelled as he ran on the track. He locked eyes w/ his super beautiful girlfriend, Yuri. She was so hot and he wsa really heterosexual and straight. Nothing would ever change that!!!!

Jonghyun, the token gay on the Sports team, immediately ran to his boyfriend in the stands, Key. The two embraced lovingly, proclaiming their love in front of the entire school because apparently homophobia isnt a thing and high schcool is just Amazing. They were the only Gays (Trademark) in the entire school (a/n: or so everyone Thought!!!!! Wink wink!!!!), and everyone knew that they Loved each other So Deeply that they would probably get married right after graduation. (a/n: jonghyun is thinking of proposing right after the game!!! He has a ring in jock strap and everything!!)

Minho looked on, disgusted. How could they possibly be okay wit THAT? He knew deep down he was truly homophobic. Minho hated gays!!! Suspicious that no one ever questioned why…

The next day they had to go to science class because it’s school and that’s what happens sometimes. Of course this was only for Loser kids, and Kim “Straight” Jonghyun wasnt One of those kids. He didnt even go to school he just sat in the basketball courts and pretended. He was cooler than That

Minho was still in class though because he was even cooler than Jonghyun and the coolest kids break the expectations of what’s expected of them. He sat in sciencey class ignoring the teacher. He scribbled down his favorite cereal recipes to pass the time.

Meanwhile, sitting int he back of the class was Taemin, even though he and minho aren’t even in the same grade. Taemin scribbled Minho’s name in little hearts all over his notebook, slamming it clsoed as loud and dramatically as possible when his teacher called him out for not paying attention.Minho didnt even know taemin Existed, let alone that he was a…..boy.. (and minho, as established, is not A Gay..he couldnt be!.. ..

Minho looked up at this. “Who’s That Girl” by EXID played in the background as Minho looked at Taemin for the first time...who WAS this boi? And WHY did he want to know? There’s no possible way that this literal nobody could make Minho question himself

The bell rang, and now it’s lunch because of course lunch happens right after the only class of the day. Taemin went to sit with Key Umma and Kim “Call Me Appa” Jonghyun at their usual lunch table (which was the only place at school jonghyun would actually go because usually hed be sitting alone in a basketball court). Taemin had lunch from home, because he would never eat the gross Cafeteria food that was served. Of course his Key Umma made the lunch for him since Taemin didn’t knwo how to make lunch at all. Taemin sipped on his 2 liter jug of banana milk(through a bendy straw courtesy of Key Umma) and innocently hummed a tune, blissfully unaware of the tragedies that occur in daily life.

“Life i s so good ummma” taemin said happily with a ray of sunshine coming down onto him from the window. Coincidentally, the sun also shines straight out of his asshole, and sometimes, a rainbow. “I don’t think anything can go wrong ever”

Just then!!! Minho, carrying his tray of Cafeteria food, tripped and fell and dropped all of his food right on Taemin’s head!!!

Key immediately stood up to defend his perfect pure virgin son, screeching at Minho for corrupting him with his School Food!!! Taemin didn’t even know what food was!! How dare Minho do this to him/!!!

“*sorry in Korean*” apologized Minho but Key umma was not having it. He hit Minho over the head with a his gucci bedazzled rhinestone purse, careful not to damage his perfectly manicured nails which no one at this school questioned, because he was the Queen Bee (and Shin Sekyung WASN’T) who everyone Feared.

Key immediately turned to Jonghyun, slapping his shoulder and saying, “Protect your Son!!!111!!”

Jonghyun, conflicted between defending his son’s honor and offending his Star Teammate, could only sit and now know what to do.

“Uwu it’s ok key ummma i-i can just go wash this off” taemin said as he poured banana milk on his head as a makeshift shower of sorts. Minho escorted him to the water fountains, dribbling a basketball as he did at literally all times ever.

“Minho oppa what’s basketball” taemin innocently asked.

“Ball is life” was the reply, Minho looking soulfully at the ceiling as if staring into the very eyes of god

“Ooooooh! That sounds so fun! Oppa-HYUNG you’re so dedicated and tall and amazing and I’m so...me” he said, sunshine still falling on him even though they were indoors, with the first hint of disappointment he’s ever shown in his whole Kawaii, Clueless life.

“Just you?” Minho yelled, dribbling his basketball faster. “NO”

“wae”

“Taemin you are so...kawaii” minho didn’t realize he said the words until he said them. A single tear rolled down his cheeks as he let himself realize...Taemin neomu yeppeo. He didnt want to admit it….but could these doki dokis…..be gay doki dokis????? It couldnt be. He continued dribbling.

“Minho ophyung..” taemin said dreamily as he stared into his chocolate orbs. This was it...he had fallen in love with the coolest jock in the school! But how could this happen? Taemin was just a lowly science nerd who even thoough was extremely pretty and beautiful nobody @ school liked him except for Key umma (and jonghyun but again, did he really evene go to this school? How old even is he???? Does he havea home?)  

Minho pushed taemin away. “Taemi i’m not gay okay and also...you’re in the sciencwe club. That’s fucking dumb” “Bbut……...hyoppa………...without science would ball still be life?”

“Ball is ALWAYS life!!!1!” Minho shouts in his face. Still dribbling.

“What if it isn’t??” Taemin challenged Minho’s way of life for the first time.”Without science, you wouldn’t even HAVE life!!”

This was too much thinking for Minho’s basketball brain to handle. Suddenly, he felt like he was going to explode. Key Umma hoped he would explode. “What if…..” taemin started, shakily, already in tears, “what if you’re–” “N O” minho answered, sprinting away with his long, gazelle like legs.

“What if…..ur my life……...hyoppa”

Minho was too far away to hear the tragic confession….

KEY’S POV

Today I’m wearing a gucci bedazzled purse, ripped jeans that has a cheetah print on them with black lace at the ends, red converse which have mud all over them from marching band even tho i don’t play an instrument, that’s only for preps! EW! (I dont march either, wwalking is too much work! They carry me on the drums because everyone fucking loves me and worships me like a god, but anyways) My diamond studded earings shone gracefully in the wind as I walked to the stupid jock-ey school holding the hands of the HOTTEST BOY I’VE EVER MET my boyfriend jonghyun! He has an eightpack and literally LIVES in a basketball court. Jonghyun isn’t just my boyfriend he’s also my bitch

Suddenly, Shin Sekyung.  And bees. What a stupid whore I hate her because she gets in the way of me and Jjongie!!! Also she has 30 boyfriends already, because shes a prep and a slut, and i only have three! Well, three counting all of jonghyun’s edgy personalities. At least two and a half are straight.

Shin Sekyung and her prep friends look at me. I put my middle finger up at them. I continue making out w my beautiful, hot bf and ignore them.

“What the hell are you doing you motherfuckers!!” Lee Sooman yelled as he ran across the campus, angrily shaking his fists.

“Oh no” Jonghyun said wearing his hot Good Charlotte shirt that I bought for him because I love Good Charlotte and MCR. Gerard Way is soooooooo hot. But not as hot as Jonghyun

“Key umma what’s going on” asked Taemin innocently as he tripped over his -2 sized shoes and fell onto the ground and dropped his banana milk. I had to protect my son from the stupid preps who go to this school that doesn’t even have any real emos in it. Sad!

I ran towards my baby careful not to get my $200 pedicure ruined by the grass

“My lil bab are u okay????? U lil innocent soul” I said as I pet his hair

“Umma what’s gay i don’t know what’s this is!”

I starts screaming that someone has corrupted his baby, even though he himself is the MotherGay, and he cradles Taemin’s perfect little cherub head close to his chest and tells him that he doens’t need to know what a penis is.

“That is only for grown ups!!!! You're too young bby” I said as I shook my head

“I went on the internet with my parents permission last night and looked it up but I just got confused! What’s a penis i don’t?? UNDERSTAND”

I SCREAMED

“TAEBBY YOU DON’T NEED TO KNOW ABOUT PENISES!!!”

“BUT UMMA I THINK I HAVE ONE!!!”

“YOU DONT KNOW THAT! GO TO BED!” “Wwe;re at schcool” he sobbed

“TAEMIN GO TAKE A NAP IT’S NAP TIME FOR SWEET INNOCENT LITTLE BBYS”

I heard balls dibidibidribbling in the distance, getting close and closer. I turned my head it was Minho with at least 50balls!

Minho was such a stupid prep and I put my middle finger up at him. “Go away minho” i yelled sexily, “you must be the reason for my small baby child son’s corruption……...

Minho sneered “psh yea i got a functioning diccccc”

“Umma,” taemin piped up from his nap, “i think my penis likes minho”

“Taemin i’ve” minho started “i’ve come to terms w/ it..i’m Gay but only for you!!!! And only because you look like a girl with your hair!! My bae you’re so beautiful if you just wore contacts and wore a lil makeup..i wanna fuck you btw. But its not gay its just you! Because ur basically a girl!”

Taemin blushed and swept a strand of his long hair away from his face. “Gomawo…. Oppa.. hyung…. What is a fuck? Can you teach me?”

Kibum SCREETCHED and ascended to another plain of reality away from the preps. Hes not dead but like, hes basically in gods hands now

MINHO’S POV

Taemins so hot I wanna have sex with him but from behind so I can pretend he’s a girl. Suddenly i got phone call from my girlfriend yuri who i completely forgot about! She squealed about how hot i was at my lacrossesoccerketball game and then asked something that i didnt care about and then hung up. I went downstairs to cook up my signature “cereal”

I put bananas and honey and spiders and a little bit of granola in it to make it into the perfect meal. I knew Yuri would love it. When did yuri get here? I dont know. I have no sense of what time is, and ive heard its fake anyways so its cool

“Taemin here’s your meal- oh no i mean yuri!!!!!!” yikes!!!!!!!!!

Taemin started crying “minho hyoppadeul what are spiders..why are you doing this to me”

I had to pretend like I didn't know what he was talking about I had to bully him because I have gay feelings that need to be pressed back in my head until i can believe they dont exist anymore because im not gay? Whats a gay? Ive never Heard of that! Shut up

Now I’m back at school, because I don’t know hwy I ever left in the first place, but I have to start bullying Taemin!!! In front of everyone!! No one can know that i am Part of a Gay. mostly the dick part because thats the manliest part

“Fuck you taemin” i said while breaking his arm just by breathing on it. I felt a little bad but then I remembered my social status is really important for my lacrosse scholarship and I’ll only get the $5 in financial aid if I’m the coolest person in school so……………….

I dibidibidribbled a baseball in one hand and pushed Taemin intoa trashcan with the other, smirking the entire time as the rest of the entire student body Laughed at him !! haha!!

Key appeared from behind the trashcan. “HOW DAR E YOU HURT MY PRECIOUS SON”

“Umma what’s death i hear it calling for me” taemins tiny bb eye s blurred with tiny tears..he was hurt and beautiful

Key umma rushes to Taemin’s side and pulls him out, pointing a manicured finger straight at Minho’s face.

“I’M GOING TO KILL YOU YOU STUPID fucking PREP” Key screeches!! He puts up his nails like a cat, having recently got them redone to be Sharp. “knock it off you mediocre dunces!!!!” Lee Sooman yelled from across the hall. He used his special principal powers to teleport us to the prinipals office which was his office actually so it was convenient in many different ways!!

Key takes his gucci purse and WHACKS me in the eyeball with it!

“ANI!” I screamed as my contact fell out and glasses magically appeared onto my face. I hid my disgusting face. Nobody could know that I swear vglasses i wanna fuckin diE

“NOW I’M AN UGLY STR8 not gay NERD!!!! HOW DARE YOU!!!!”

Taemin starts crying, because he thinks his miinho hyoppa thinks he’s ugly because he wears Glasses like a NErd. Taemins half dead corpse whispered from the floor, “omo…..i………...wear glasses too Hyungpa..”

“Taemin my soul mate,,,” i reached out to grab taemins hand in my pinky finger because he’s so small. “I want to tell you i- I am only part of a “gay” for you”

Taein cried “wgat is part of gay...are you a buy of sexual?”

“Yes,” minho whispers, “i’m buying a sexual… my peen…. Lovs u….”

“Minho hyoppa” taemin croaks from his half dead state “what’s a peen?”

“GODDAMMIT TAEMIN” KEY SCREAMS “YOU CAN’T KNOW WHAT A PEEN IS”

“Is it what i have?” taemin reaches down to show key the extra leg he thought he had in his pants. Between his legs wasn’t a penis but….is that senator Bernie Sanders??!?!?!??!?!

Minho gasps. “Here’s how Bernie can still win!!!”

Then Minho dribbled a basketball into the distance with Taemin hanging off of the ball.

“It’s time to dibidibidie, taemin”

“What’s a die?” taemin asked

Key umma could be heard yelling in the distance, but MInho was already dribbling Taemin into the light. As they approached what was (probably) heaven, and not just a hallucination due to taemins pain meds which were actually just bird seeds(key umma would never let him take real drugs!! Those are DANGEROUS!!), krystal, aka G O D, appeared unto them and stated her wisdom,

“Taekai is real..minho who?”

“Whos kai this is 2010”

“I’m from the future and you’re gay” “Whats gay”

“Sorry did i say kai i mean...nickhyun. Taenickhun is real”

Suddenly onew appeared eating chicken, trippping ovr everything.

Taemin looked at him and gasped. “Hyung… i havent seen you in years… since you died in the skeleton war………..“

“I was off raising a heavenly chicken farm!! I’m marying a fried chicken leg!! Pls come to my wedding in Chicken Heaven” onew said

“ENOUGH” said Krystal aka G O D as she clapped her thunderous hands, obliterating Onew from existence. He doesn’t belong in 2minjongkey universe.

Taemin started crying. “Where did hyung go, minho hyoppa?”

“Taemin…” Minho said, trying to shield his tiny bf from the pains of death but ultimately failing to do so. “Sometimes people jst fucking leave ok. Jsut like my dad”

“But minho we just went to heaven and god didnt let me die”

“God doesnt let angels die”

Taemin wings grew just then...it was then that everyone remembered he was a Literal Angel. A literal angel. Actually.

“Is this why you didn’t know anything about sex?” Minho asks.

“The only sex ed in heaven is Abstinence” taemin tells him “so you’re going to hell”

“Well damn can we fix that” minho asked, still fucking dribbbling a basketball. Or something

“But hyoppa i don’t know how to sex you have to teach me ;) bb”

Key materialized from the got damn toilet, previously having brunch with GOD, and clapped his sparkly magenta, not green bcs green is for dicks(except jonghyuns dick bcos key liked that one) manicured hands twice, transporting them to who fucking knwos “LISTEN BITCH” Shin Sekyung roared as she tore out Key’s sparkly pink hair extensions. Key tried to hit Sekyung (jfc poor girl i can see her funeral) with his gucci purse but missed, flinging it into the distance as he screamed.

Key turned, telling his super hot muscular popular bad-boy boyfriend Jjong to tell this Prep Bitch Shin Sekyung that he was dating Key now!!! And she needed to get her Prep Ass away from him!! “Jonghyun. Buy me a new purse” key said to his boyfriend, flicking his hair in a diva-ish manner and bounced his soft hips (i read something like this in a fanfic holy shit)

Event hough Jonghyun is still in high school and never goes to class and has no job, he has rich ass parents, so he can buy Key anything he wants. He pulls out his dad’s credit card and tells Key to pick out any purse he wants!!!

Key picks out the purse that those ugly preps would dislike the most, and makes a mental note to slap all of them with it.

Jonghyun buys the purse for him and gives it to his diva boyfriend. Then taemin appears.

“Umma i ran out of banana milk :( minho said i could drink his but i don’t know what he means… i didn’t see him with any milk” Key Umma started screeching into oblivion, and Jonghyun had to wave aroudn his credit card with promises of a new outfit to get him to calm down and come back to the mortal plain of existence.

That’s when Key Umma ran straight to Minho!!! That PREP had corrupted his baby!!!

“HE WAS INNOCENT U BITCH!!” Key screams in Minho’s face. “YOU TOLD HIM WHAT A PEEN IS!!”

Minho frowned, dribbling his basketball more aggressively hsi totally stoic cold face(trademark) existing.

“But he has a peen”

“THAT DOESN’T MEAN HE KNEW WHAT IT WAS!!1!!”

Taemin, sipping on a new bottle of banana milk that Jonghyun had pulled out of his ass for him, only shifted his eyes between his umma and his new (secret!!) boyfriend. Key Umma couldn’t know that Minho was his (secret!!) boyfriend! No one could know, because then everyone would know that Minho was part of a gay, and Minho didn’t want anyone to know that. He might lose his spot on the basketball team since Jonghyun is the only gay allowed!!!

“I didn’t tell him.” minho said. “Telling him might make people think… i’m a…. gay...w hich i’m not. I have a girlfriend her name is yuri. Shes really hot and i know this because i’m straight”

Taemin’s eyes filled with tears. “Hyoppa….”

Minho pushed Taemin into a trashcan again, the banana milk flying from Taemin’s hands and up into the air, only to open compeltely and spill onto the top of his head. His tears mixed with the banana milk flowing down his chubby baby cheeks. He couldn’t believe his Minho hyoppa would say he was a Straight.

“Key Umma, what is a straight?” Taemin asks through banana tears.

“I’M GOING TO KILL THAT PREP MINHO!!”

Key umma, finally so fed up with that DUMB PREP!! flew (a/n: very literally!!) at Minho, hitting him in the head with his brand new gucci purse!!

Minho’s brain popped straight out of his skull, and it was actually basketball this entire time!!!

Minho’s body was still working without it’s basketball brain, and so he reached over and started dibidibidribbling his basketbrain.

Suddenly Amy walked in she was so cool!! She’s an OC shh.

“Who are you?” key asked. “Another dumb prep?!!!! Are you here to steal my popular hot muscular jonghyun?”

(A/N buy press it on iTunes)

Suddenly, Amy hovered in the air and magicalyl turned into Shin Sekyung!!! THAT PRE P BITCH!!

Key threw his purse straight at that Prep Bitch’s head, killing Shin Sekyamy instantly. She ascended into Prep Heaven and haunted them all for the rest of eternity.

Suddenly, her soul turned into a piece of chicken. Onew appeared and picked up what was left, munching on it happily. “My kokoro goes dugeun dugeun for chicken” he said when he had finished.

Taemin gasped. “Hyung!!!!!!!! You’re back!!!!!” and then he started crying again, clutching minho’s shirt wetting it (with tears xdxdxd)

“I must go” onew said. “I need to finish marrying my chicken wife.” and without another word, he evaporated, leaving behind a trail of chicken grease and nuggets.

Out of sudden and behind the grease and dust the gucci slippers appeared.

Taemin gasped. “Hyoppa…. Look… they’re beautiful….”

Key took the slippers right off of Taemin’s feet and hit him over the head with them.

“DO NOT” Key screamed “DO THIS TO MY INNOCENT PERFECT BABY CHILD.”

“But I am your innocent perfect baby child” taemin stuttered, banana tears welling up in his eyes.

“THEN DO NOT,” KEY SCREAMED “DO THIS”

With that, Key disappeared into the void. To finally burn those shits

Taemin cried harder. “Hyoppa… why did he take them from me…. My kokoro is so sad… please make me happy again”

Minho kept dibidibidribbling his basketbrain.

Taemin didn’t seem to notice that Minho no longer had the top of his skull, which was where his basketbrain fell out of. It was okay, because Taemin loved his Minho hyoppa no matter what!!!

“Minho hyoppa…. Do you think… i’m a gay?”

“You can’t be a gay,” minho tells him. “Because i can’t be in love with a gay. I am a straight.”

Taemin starts crying. Key Umma can be heard screaming sassily from the Void(which now was pink)

“I can be the only gay on the basketball team” bling bling says.(a/n: bling bling is jonghyun xD)

Jonghyun, furious at the thought of not being the only gay on the team, shoves Minho away from him. In the Heat of the Moment, Jonghyun accidentally pushes Minho into Taemin!!! Minho was already dead, his body dribbling his basketbrain post-mortem, but Taemin, who was still alive, gets shoved into a trashcan for the last time. His head cracks open from hitting the edge of the trashcan, and a bottle of bananamilk spills out of his head. That was the end of Taemin, for he ascended into heaven so he could take his rightful place as Perfect Baby Virgin Angel of Heaven (trademark).

Jonghyun looks down at them sadly, a single tear rolling down his cheek. “Dibidibidis… his name was minho.”

Key, furious from his place in the void, literally fucking launches himself at Jonghyun, and the two of them blow up at the impact. A Gay Rainbow is left in their place, permanently.

Shin Sekyamy ressurrects from the dead, and she laughs maniacally. This had been her plan all along - to get them to all kill each other!!! Now she could be the Real Queen Bee!! Key Umma Whom???

Dibidibidone.

#shinee #2min #jongkey #onchicken