#and what about trans men of color? do they not get to see themselves in anything because that'd be stealing representation from woc?

[theorderofthetriad]

you're SO right, my apologies to the women of... *checks notes* 17th century Japan for ignoring their real struggles. the things i said on tumblr in the year 2023 must have been really hurtful for them to read.

look at yourself in the mirror, make eye contact through it, and answer these questions: do you think that sexism doesn't exist outside of Japan? do you think sexism doesn't exist in places where white people are from? do you think that only white people can be trans, or that Japanese people can't be?

i've seen this shit-tier argument quite a few times with minor variations and my takeaway from it is "wow, it is really fucking racist to act like sexism is solely unique to Asia." like, do you people ever read back what you wrote and actually think about what you've said?

sexism exists all around the world, trans people exist all around the world. historical cases of "women" who lived their lives as men exist all around the world. sexism existing and trans men existing are not mutually exclusive.

Remind me, how many other women in the show are dressing up and living as men? None? But aren't they all facing oppressive sexism? So why is only Mizu living as a man? Here is a little secret I'll let you in on as a trans person: we will take any excuse to be ourselves. "I'm going to dress and live as a man because of sexism!" is a great example of that.

The way you guys talk about it you'd think near damn every woman in the world would be living as a man, but actually, shockingly, women don't want to live as men. You know who does want to live as men? Trans men, shocker I know!

Anyways, I'm always gonna say Mizu Blue Eye Samurai is a trans man no matter how many straws you transphobes grasp for.

#fuck you bigots tripping over yourselves to claim a trans headcanon is actually sexist and racist #like oppression is a fucking competition #classic crab bucket bullshit #because obviously if mizu is trans that's stealing representation from cis women (because cis women are sooooo underrepresented) #''well we mean women of color'' there are way more stories led by cis women of color than by trans men of ANY race #and what about trans men of color? do they not get to see themselves in anything because that'd be stealing representation from woc? #santagno #blue eye samurai #<- putting in the tag bc honestly fuck you coming to MY HOUSE to say this dumb shit when the post this is responding to is NOT in the tag #turning off my asks now. y'all can seethe

[ravens-two]

PAC: What Does Your Future Spouse Look Like?

This reading includes:

your FS's general physical traits

your FS's vibes & celebrities with similar vibes

The extended reading includes:

your FS's fashion style

your first impression of your FS 

Disclaimer: this is just for entertainment purposes, and as a pick-a-card reading it may not resonate for everyone.

TIPS | BOOK A READING WITH ME | PATREON | LINKTREE | SUGGEST A PAC TOPIC

Pile 1

Houdini - Dua Lipa

Five of Cups, Ten of Pentacles, Two of Pentacles

Pile 1, the first thing I notice in your person is their eyes. It's not necessarily about the color - although it could be that they're a particularly pretty color - but more that they are very expressive. It also seems that for most of you, this person has really big eyes. Perhaps round or almond shaped too. Think something like Al Pacino, Cate Blanchett, Liv Tyler, Kurt Cobain or Adrien Brody for example. They can convey a lot of emotion with just their eyes. I also see that some of them have crow's feet when they smile too, which is really endearing honestly.

Another thing that I pick up from your person is that they seem to have a vaguely sad vibe to them. Do you know that meme "my poor little meow meow"? Their vibe is a bit similar in a way. They just look like they're sad and you have the urge to take care of them. Again, think a bit about someone like Kurt Cobain or Adrien Brody.

When it comes to their body they're tall or, at least, they give the impression of being tall and broad. Especially for men, they have broad shoulders even if they aren't muscled or chubby. For the women I also think that they tend to have broad shoulders and a narrower waist, but their most prominent feature seems to be their chest. They may have big boobs or they tend to use clothes that emphasize their boobs. I think that even for the men, their chest is quite prominent.

When it comes to vibes it's mostly what I've already said your person has this "please love me" vibe. Despite this, they're capable of commanding attention and they tend to look quite elegant. It may be that they have a lot of pisces placements or a pisces rising. In general, I think that they're attractive, but not like conventionally attractive or Hollywood attractive if that makes sense.

I also think that your person shows themself differently to different people. With you they may feel more comfortable to be a "poor little meow meow" while with others they're more closed off and may even appear a bit cold. I just heard that they have a poker face, so with other people they may completely close off and be hard to read.

(extended reading here)

Pile 2

Kiss Me More - Doja Cat ft. SZA

Six of Wands, Page of Wands, Eight of Swords

Hi, pile 2, your FS is the type of person that gets other people's attention. They are very conventionally attractive (I feel like especially when it comes to their face), but they don't really see themselves life this. In fact, I think that they're quite insecure about their appearance. This almost feels like body dysmorphia honestly (and for some of you it could be related to them being trans, while for others it could be related to an eating disorder). The reality is that they can't see themselves the way other people see them.

They have really thick and luscious hair - it reminds me a bit of Carlos Sainz or Ben Barnes for the men - and most likely it's either wavy or straight. For most of you they have rather long hair, the men tend to have up to shoulder length hair, while for the women it can come down to their waist. When it comes to color, most likely it's dark, but for some of you it could be bleached.

Most of them seem to have tanned or dark skin, this isn't really about skin color, if they have black skin for example, it's really dark. For the people with lighter-skin they have a tendency to blush a lot or get flushed (especially after drinking). They also have really pretty teeth, probably very straight or they just look endearing, and a pretty mouth too. Despite having a pretty mouth not all of them have thick lips, it's more about the shape of their mouth. I feel like they tend to smile a lot. It kind of reminds me of Julia Roberts a bit who is known for her smile.

Some celebrities that have similar vibes to them are Carlos Sainz, Julia Roberts, Anok Yai, Adut Akech, Dominik Szoboszlai and Michael B. Jordan. 

When it comes to their vibes they seem to be youthful and always in their own world. It's almost like they aren't really paying attention to what's going on around them. They also seem to be a bit introverted or closed-off in public, despite all the eyes that they attract. If surrounded by friends they may be a bit more open and might be cracking up jokes with them. No matter what they seem to be really nice and will always give a small smile to other people, like the waiter at the restaurant for example.

(extended reading here)

Pile 3

The Shadow of Your Smile - Nancy Sinatra

Four of Pentacles, King of Swords rx, Ace of Pentacles

Pile 3, your person doesn't seem to be very tall. They're either medium height or actually small. It may also be that their vertical line is short even if they are in fact on the taller side they seem shorter than they really are. But, the most noticeable thing about them is that they seem to always have a serious expression on their face - some of them even have a resting bitch face. I think that they have very expressive eyebrows, they may even move them without meaning to. You'll be able to tell what they think by their eyebrows. Like, they may have look super serious almost as if they're upset but by their eyebrows you can actually tell that they're just relaxed. Speaking of their eyebrows they also seem to be very full or bushy. I don't think that there's a monobrow here, but it could also be the case.

When it comes to their face your FS has really strong facial features, especially their jaw and nose. The jaw reminds me a bit of Angelina Jolie for the women and for the men it seems to be a bit of a mix between Timothée Chalamet and Henry Cavill. For some it's more square while for others it's sharper. The noses here tend to be either aquiline or roman, but either way they're also quite prominent. Think a bit Gisele Bundchen, Jenny Slate or Alba Flores for example, or Hrithik Roshan and Dev Patel.

I don't know how to explain it but they also have a very earthy vibe, like tanned skin, freckles, calloused hands, it's like they just came back from working in the garden, if that makes sense. They also have brown or black hair, and the men tend to have beards (nothing too big though). They also have super clear and healthy looking skin.

Besides the eyebrows I also think that they have really noticeable hands. Their hands may be big or just very pretty in general, they may be veiny too. Their nails are healthy and well kept, and they probably have long and thick fingers. The way they move their hands may also be very attractive, like their gestures or just by being very dextrous with their hands. When it comes to their body they tend to be thicker or chubbier, I'm seeing like amazing and really thick thighs for both men and women. I also feel like your FS exercises a lot or they move a lot because of their work and so they tend to be chubby with a lot of muscle underneath.

In general, I think that their vibe is just very chill. They have a "don't fuck with me" vibe, but they're just doing their own thing and don't really want anyone to bother them. They also seem to be very hard-workers and earthy as I said, like down-to-earth too. These aren't people with delusions of grandeur.

(extended reading here)

Pile 4

Crazy - Aerosmith

Lovers rx, Empress rx, Knight of Cups

Pile 4, this is my androgynous and gender non-conforming pile. If you're familiar with the Kibbe body types or essences, these people would be the Ethereal or Angelic essence. Do you know the Lord of the Rings elves? Yeah, basically that's the vibe. Their features are delicate and they can look a bit otherworldly. Think of Tilda Swinton, Willow Smith, Halle Bailey or Lisa Bonnet. For the men you have again Lee Pace and Orlando Bloom as elves, but also Eddie Redmayne, Cillian Murphy, Jared Leto and Ethan Torchio. For me, Ethan Torchio from Maneskin is the best example for men here. He embodies the facial features and hair that makes him look quite androgynous, and also a bold and avant-garde style.

In general, your person tends to look a bit flirty or mischievous. Again, they have this elf or fairy vibe to them. They tend to look playful and approachable. This isn't the type of person you'd be afraid of talking to, they just seem super nice and open. 

No matter the skin color your person also tends to be pale, this is more their complexion really. Some of them may look a bit like vampires think Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt in Interview with a Vampire. They also have clear skin and the men tend not to have beards. When it comes to hair it tends to be long, especially for the men. For the women, I actually think that they may tend to have shorter hair or even a shaved head.

Their faces are beautiful, but not really conventionally attractive. They have something otherworldly about them that just pulls you to them. They may also have asymmetrical faces, especially when it comes to the eyes or jaw. Also, speaking of eyes they have really intense eyes. The type that seems that they can look right through you. Besides pile 1, this is the pile that seems like they may have light eyes.

When it comes to their body shape they are leaner instead of muscly or thick. They may have muscle definition, but they're just lean and maybe a bit lanky. They seem like they have a high vertical line or they're tall. In general though, they're just long. They have long legs, long arms, even long fingers.

(extended reading here)

#pick a card #pick a card reading #fs pac #fs pick a pile #fs pick a card #love tarot reading #tarot #pac reading #tarot reading #pac #pick a pile

[doberbutts]

One of the things that really confuses me (I'm a cis woman of color) is this doubling down on the idea that Black men aren't oppressed because they're men, they're oppressed because they're Black, gay men aren't oppressed because they're men, they're oppressed because they're gay, trans men aren't oppressed because they're men, they're oppressed because they're trans, etc. It feels like people are being intentionally obtuse. You can't separate my identity as a POC from my identity as a woman. I am treated the way I'm treated because I'm a woman of color, those two things work together. That's where discussions of intersectionality originated. So to say you can separate a privileged identity from an oppressed one is just.... not how anything works?

I constantly see "masculinity isn't criminalized/demonized, Blackness, queerness, transness are" and it's like.... no, that's not how this happens. Marginalized men face specific oppression based on the intersection of their identities. It seems like lately people are willing to understand that for women but not willing to for men and I just don't know how we make any progress if radfem rhetoric has become so pervasive that people are refusing to see lived realities rather than some abstract hypothetical they've come up with.

Personally I think this is due to (white) people seeing and liking black theory that they personally agree with or that makes sense to be applied to their own lives, and then cut out all the parts that are inconvenient for them to have to reconcile. Much like how many, many, many black feminists who are cis women have said "hey, white feminists, stop it with the all men are rapists thing, it actively contributes to black men getting lynched for crimes they didn't commit because it gets weaponized unfairly against our brothers" and white feminists collectively forgot how to read and abandoned their listening skills while still praising other parts of black feminism that talk about domestic violence and sexual assault and oversexualization and reproductive rights and rightly taking black men to task for their continued complacency in this.

The phrase "intersectionality" originated in black feminist theory. I do not trust any white person to fully understand black feminism when they use it as a bludgeon to make the inconvenient bits be quiet. Much of what is on this blog is black feminism. It is inconvenient for white people to have to consider how their words and actions may harm people of color while still lifting themselves up.

As you have said, you cannot separate the "of color" from the "woman" parts of your identity. You are a woman of color. That changes how both sexism and racism works against you in a system that is both sexist and racist. I, in the same manner, cannot separate the "trans" from the "man"- if I were not a man, I would be a woman. I am AFAB, if I am a woman, I am not trans. There is no "you experience this because you are transgender, not because you are a man". In order to be a man, in my body, I have to be transgender*. Just like there is no "you experience this because you are black, not because you are a man". I am a black man. The black experience is inherently, often forcibly, gendered. I can tell you exactly how people treating me changed in a "before" and "after". I can tell you that yes, some of it absolutely stems from the "man" part, they treat me this way because I am a black man.

But people often misunderstand intersectionality to be, exclusively, axis of oppression. And so they say, well learn intersectionality, men aren't oppressed and thus it's not an axis of oppression to combine. But that ignores that some men are oppressed, marginalized men are oppressed and often with a very gendered slant. And it ignores that, like how you cannot separate the "woman" from the "of color", neither can you do that with men.

Men are not the default. They are slightly less than half the population, same as women.

*re: in order to be a man in my body I must be transgender; yes, I am intersex. However I have been out as transgender for 17 years, and discovered I am intersex 6 months ago. So for me, that is very much the case. For other intersex people who were assigned female at birth, that may not be the case. This is something that works on an individual level but cannot be broadbrushed as there are many different opinions among intersex people regarding our cisgender vs transgender status.

[dreikit-23]

There is a Rampant and Vicious Cycle in the Online Left That Needs to Be Addressed

Every leftist needs to understand that not every proclaimed leftist is a safe person or one that is acting in good faith. Many people in this sphere --even if they are minorities themselves-- are Abusers. Let me be clear: they are Abusers REGARDLESS of --NOT because of-- them being a minority. Despite this, many of them have weaponized their standing as a minority in order to get away with their behavior and achieve what they see as some form of power and control over others. Let me be clear. I am referring to those that:

Manipulate and lie about pressing situations (especially when it's to harm another person or demographic)

Excessively use idpol to either elevate themselves to holier than thou levels ("listen to ___ people but only when it's something I agree with, which just so happens to devolve from constructive change to making others grovel and plead forgiveness endlessly before me") or belittle others (ie their skin color, gender, queerness, disability, neurodivergence, religion, age, etc.) in order to discount their point or not treat them as equal human beings; yes, even if their skin tone is white or if they are men, abuse does not have to be backed up by systemic issues in order to be abusive or at the very least harmful (sidenote: this does not apply to people talking about their experiences as a minority that is otherwise not experienced or understood by others, the issue I'm pointing out is when it's twisted to cover everything not directly tied to their identity and proclaim themselves as the only ones allowed to be the voice of reason, therefore shutting up everyone else and to avoid any constructive criticism or discussion)

Act on rage and at times even trauma to bring forth harmful ideals (ex: truly hating every person of a demographic, wishing for a genocide, making actual death or rape threats towards someone or a group, conversion, etc)(sidenote: I'm not discounting those that have trauma and even have harmful thoughts, just please seek help and understand that it is not healthy nor sustainable to paint or alter reality to be in line with what trauma makes you believe)

Actively try to get others they don't agree with to either permanently leave the internet or commit suicide and even celebrate when either happens

Excessively test others on their "purity" on unachievable standards to the detriment of everyone and Leftism as a whole (purity culture is fueled by christian culture in order to disguise doomerism, accepting defeat when change is not possible, of which is the very thing that will kill leftism)

Infight over weird made up issues (remember how divide and conquer is a war strategy? To split hairs and discount others for non-issues is to do the work of conservatives and nazis for them)

Shut down people or discussions over minor slights such as using an incorrect word/phrasing or any numerous perceived mistakes (example I've seen here: berating a person with schizophrenia (or a trans person or any other minority) for using a derogatory term for themselves when they're talking about how everyone else is speaking over them and not listening), ignoring the hypocrisy or not taking into account any number of mundane causes such as non-native english speakers, generational gaps, being in the process of learning (either recovering from harmful beliefs or simple ignorance), using those terms to prove a point (such as that example I mentioned above), neurodivergence, etc.

Not letting others talk about their experiences of oppression when those experiences don't match theirs, instead opting to call those people bigoted for contrived reasons

A rejection of nuance, intersectionalism, and even reality to better suit their goals (ex: claiming that every trans man benefits from the patriarchy and can never experience misogyny)

Misuse of therapy speak and terminology in order to water down those terms and render them near meaningless so they can weaponize them under the pretense of their original use (ex: gaslighting), or to cut off any need to connect or sympathize with other human beings and instead speak to them like a PR message (refer to this video by Zena and Poppy for reference)

They never speak on true leftist/progressive ideals or positive change, they only engage in destructive discourse or any behavior listed above

Making baseless dangerous accusations towards someone they don't like. Before you go harr harr you're doing that, I'm not calling out any specific person and am merely listing dangerous behaviors I've seen people here act out. What I am referring to are when someone casually calls someone specific a predator (or whatever else) with absolutely zero proof and expecting everyone to believe them no questions asked. This has been shown to ruin people's lives

Any other similar behaviors not included in this list (as well as classic logical fallacies), but what I've mentioned above should paint you a good picture

Every example I've pointed out were REAL EVENTS I've seen from people that proclaim themselves as leftists or even just progressive, and sometimes are even minorities themselves (some even infight against their own communities using the behaviors listed above, often out of internalized bigotry)(an example of a real event that happened here recently were when several people were making rape threats towards a trans man by the username of @a-faggot-with-opinions). To be blunt, I'm pointing out exclusionism in practically every form, asexual discourse, transandrophobia, TERFs/radfems, TEHMs, tankies, "cornbreadtube", nationalists and ethnonationalists, and all else I don't have the terminology for For many of the people that fall under that bullet list I would hesitate to even refer to them as leftist or progressive, as they never seem to actually show they act on it or even believe in it, only making an appearance in those communities for their own destructive personal gain; hell, often times they have ideals that directly go against what those communities stand for! Examples include TERFs with white supremacist beliefs, transandrophobes that are misogynistic, ethnonationalists that are antisemitic, puritans that are ableist, the list goes on forever. Once you know what to look for, you can see the hidden or overt bigotry behind their false "progressive" statements

No one is infallible No one is better than everyone else You are not immune to propaganda No one is immune from behaving abusively

These people are dangerous, whether they actually qualify as abusers --as I've been referring to them as such for brevity and impact-- or are people that are engaging in hurtful or fully abusive behavior (use this paragraph as a disclaimer, I of course can't know if someone is an abuser in real life unless there is documented evidence of such). Regardless, they are hurting the left and are letting the right win

If you see any of these behaviors either 1) take caution if you're unsure, 2) block them, or 3) if you have the fortitude, call them out. Either way, use your best judgement and think for yourself (or discuss with good faith leftists if you're uncertain). And remember, often times (albeit not always) they are actually fully aware of their disgusting behavior and are choosing to act maliciously, not ignorantly.

Stay safe, log off, do what you can to support your local community and leftism as a whole, don't let these people distract from the real issues at hand. Have empathy, if you don't have empathy then act in compassion, if you don't or refuse to do either please do not engage in politics. Misanthropy has no place in matters concerning humanity.

And remember: we have to stand together in unity so we can create a better future for all

#politics #leftism #online left #discourse #tw abuse #tw rape mention #tw genocide mention #tw bigotry #racism #transphobia #transandrophobia #purity culture #vent #this goes for several issues I haven't mentioned whether due to a lack of proper wordage or expertise due to not being part of those groups #I'm a non-native english speaker who is autistic be aware of that if I do misphrase something #Poppy and Zena: Wholesome Degenerates is an excellent youtube channel please check them out #if anyone argues here in bad faith feel free to use this post as a free block list #had so much to say but now I can get back to shitposting les go

[enbesbians]

hi, just wanted to come back here since i haven’t been on this app for almost a week and i wanted to make a little psa. to start off, if you’re transphobic, unfollow me right fucking now.

i dislike hateful people— people who don’t use their heads to understand the dangers of something as simple as questioning a trans person if they’re really gay/lesbian just because they don’t fit your idea of what it is to be within that community. if you’re inclined to send me (because i am in time, including fics for trans readers) and other writers death threats, reevaluate your life decisions and morals and also… maybe, don’t fucking read it???

trans women have been on the news for who knows how long with headlines of them being brutally beaten and having their life taken away just because they finally have the confidence to be the person they always felt inside. do you know how hard it is to come to terms with yourself? find out your true self? allow yourself to be comfortable and happy and feel fucking free? do you know how hard it is just to walk down the goddamn street without worrying about a fucking weirdo in your ear telling you that you’re a man just because you’re openly an transgendered woman? women already have it hard, needing to walk on pins and needles when walking alone in the street or going to clubs or just going to simple fucking places without being harassed because of the fear that’s instilled in them because of nasty fucking people and their need to be hateful and indulgent.

being in the lgbtq community is hard as is and every subgroup within it deals with their own traumatic shit more times than not— so if you think that it’s okay to twiddle your fucking fingers, make long rants, send death threats to people and overall be a hateful, judgmental, insensitive and an ignorant person is disgusting and it shows your true colors. just because someone writes a lesbian/pansexual woman as trans, does not mean that they’re any less of a lesbian than they already identify themselves as.

trans women are fucking women and trans men are fucking men! stop thinking you, as a cisgendered person has all the say in the world on whether or not they’re able to identify themselves as gay/pansexual or anything in between. if you’re questioning a cisgendered lesbian women for having a trans partner, i just want you to close your lips, turn off your fucking phone and get out of other people’s business and lifestyles.

please go look into the lgbtq+ history and see how trans women have helped and contributed to the community— look and see how much death and suffering they all go to endure. look at all the young trans children taking their lives just because people can’t wrap their head around people just wanting to live their lives.

and another thing… if you see a trans person and they aren’t ‘passing’ to you, that does NOT give you the opportunity to question them. that does NOT give you the right to misgender them. that does NOT mean you yell at their cisgender partner calling them straight (if they’re a lesbian couple), or gay (if it’s a cis man and a trans woman). please do not do that, it’s sad to see and it’s overall unattractive to be this hateful.

#fern talks🍃 #lesbian #sapphic #wlw

[drdemonprince]

I don't know if this a place to share, or if this even relevant to anything, but i want to share an observation. I've been around queer groups for a decade or so, usually just observing and listening, and something i have observed is that very slowly trans women (specially out trans women and non-passing ones) seem to have incredible being reduce in meetings and talks. Like i used to see way more of them but now it is becoming less and less. For some reason they seem to have been push out of the spaces very subtly and nobody seems to care (i don't have an explanation of this at all). On the other hand the amount of trans men and trans masculine folk seem to have maintained some consistency. I don't exactly know whats going on this communities, but there seems to be something that is pushing trans women away, while not having the same effect on trans men. I don't have any solutions, just wanted to share because i feel like as a trans woman I am less and less welcomed in queer spaces but can't really pin point why is that.

Thanks for your message anon and for sharing this observation. The thing is: We know what is going on! Trans women talk about this all the time! Trans men and other TME trans people speak over them, sexually harass them, downplay their concerns, talk about them having "male" socialization, take advantage of their emotional labor, ignore them, don't give them room to be vulnerable, nitpick their stories of abuse and mistreatment, disbelieve them when they have been victimized, and all the while complain that they are so much more visible and have so many more resources than trans mascs do (which just is not true) and talking about how disgusting penises are.

You probably have not noticed these dynamics happening directly; most men are oblivious to sexism to an extent, and even men who have experienced plenty of sexism themselves as trans guys can miss these dynamics when they are experienced by trans women. It also is the case that a lot of the worst abuses happen behind the scenes: there are a lot of predatory people who are trans or enby yet behave as invasive chasery creeps to trans women, all while constantly indicating to trans women that they will not be believed if they come forward about abuse -- and in fact will be accused of being the abusers themselves.

I have multiple trans women friends here in Chicago who simply cannot show up to certain queer community events like beach days or club nights because they know there's a specific "afab enby" there who will grope them and then accuse them of abuse. There's entire self-defense guides designed for trans women meant to address this specific issue because it is so widespread.

And that is just one issue that a lot of trans women face in gender diverse or generally queer spaces. At a queer/pup karaoke night two weeks ago, multiple drunk bar patrons harassed and physically attacked a trans woman there, and then when the cops arrived, they tried to arrest the trans woman. (Thankfully all the bar staff and event organizers were very very clear that she was not the one provoking the fight -- but the cops still didn't really believe them. The man who attacked her is banned from the bar now forever. She isn't. If she'd been in a slightly less sympathetic crowd, who knows what would have happened).

In another local queer community group I used to attend, a trans femme board member was accused of abuse in the vaguest terms possible -- by someone who has now, years later, been outed as abusing multiple women close to him himself. Most people in this group have no idea about it, of course. It all happened in shadowy conjecture and whisper campaigns. I could go on and on and thanks for your patience but you get the picture.

I don't know what the vibe is in the groups you frequent, and I can't guarantee that any of the trans women have dropped off the map because of anything as severe as this, but I pretty much can guarantee there are some dynamics there that are making them uncomfortable. My suggestion? If there were any trans women in the group that you liked, try hitting them up. Ask some of them out for coffee. Ask what she's been reading or watching lately. Go to the museum or a show. Be her friend. Don't pry about why she stopped going to the group, just be a friendly, supportive presence in her life. In time, you might learn why she and others like her stopped going to that space. or you'll just have greater gender diversity in your life and your support circle, which is really important. Some trans spaces are utterly ruined by the presence of a few toxic trans mascs or aggressively afab-identified people. But you can help to build better spaces one relationship at a time.

Thanks again for your message.

[ltstrikesback]

TLDR: Monkey Man was so beautiful and so much more than meets the eye.

Spoilers below/me being mildly pretentious:

As someone who has not gone to the movies to see anything other than queer films lately, my girlfriend got us tickets to Monkey Man. She practices jujutsu and likes John Wick and thought this movie would be similar.

I am a huge Dev Patel fan, though, when I saw the trailer before a viewing of Love Lies Bleeding, I figured I might not actually end up seeing it. I didn’t think I was the target audience. I also don’t love action heavy, guns blasting movies in theaters themselves because it’s a bit sensory overload for me. I felt myself make a mental note to watch it on streaming and already forgetting to do so. Flash forward to me and my partner in the theater and I was in awe.

This movie is about a small village who is violently forced off their land so the elite can build a factory. Dev Patel’s character—Kid—is a child the day the village is expelled. He witnesses his mother’s murder and years later seeks revenge on the man who killed her. When he fails to enact his revenge, he finds himself in a city wide man hunt, ending with him falling into a river, drowning. But he is saved! By a small community of hijra—trans women—who live in a temple nearby.

Walking into this movie I didn’t expect social commentary or politics. I anticipated a Rocky type movie, contained to the story of one individual’s hero’s journey. (People keep mentioning John Wick as a comparison. I just mentioned it in this very post but I haven’t actually seen it for the record.) Monkey Man is specifically not about one individual or one individual’s revenge. This was my takeaway. The message we see over and over is that there are things in this life bigger than ourselves. It is literally impossible to save yourself by yourself—you need community.

I’ll take a step back now to acknowledge that I am not sure how familiar everyone is with current politics in India. I myself have limited insight but have friends who are personally affected by the current climate. There is a strong wave towards Hindu nationalism under PM Modi. It’s yet another instance of what feels like the whole world turning to fascism. The movie uses real clips from real instances of social clashes to paint the landscape of this fictional city. Also, I was reading into the backstory and potential censorship of this film and learned the villain’s colors were originally orange, not red. A clear parallel to the current Hindu nationalism at hand. There are clips of crowds attacking trans people. There are boos at the mention of Muslims and Christians. There are scapegoats in this film that are intentionally pulled from real life.

Now to jump back in—I have to say I was completely moved by the entire sequence at the temple. The temple is dedicated to Ardhanarishvara—a god who is part woman and part man. The hijra community has found a home here, albeit on the outskirts of society. The leader tells Kid, “no one will come looking for you here.” Their status in society protects him in a serendipitous way. They are also the ones that nourish him and help him train for his next mission. Not only that, but we see this community smile, laugh, flirt, and fight. I loved the scene with Kid and the drummer, with the girls cat calling him from afar (same). It was so tender to see trans joy, even in mundanity, amidst persecution.

When Kid has self-actualized and essentially is Hanuman, the part monkey God the movie is named after, he takes on the political elites. There is a moment he is surrounded by bodyguards in this hotel sequence. He’s outnumbered and out comes our hijra fam to the rescue. They take down these men. And it is so fucking amazing. I mean, really, it’s so fucking amazing to see them fight for themselves, for each other and be the hero.

To wrap up, I also wanted to touch on the fight sequences’ production. I mentioned I don’t really like fight scenes because I get sensory overload but the music in this film resolved this issue for me. It wasn’t pure screams or gunshots. There was a really fun soundtrack that added a great twist to the film. Kind of reminds me when they break out electric guitars in Chinese historical dramas. Just another thing about this movie that really worked. At least for me personally.

Last thought—my take away is not necessarily to say “put Dev Patel in everything” which is happening in the online discourse. (There’s a weird opposite-of-cancel-culture thing that happens sometimes where audiences obsess and then forget about actors or artists. Idk.) Rather: let this man do whatever he wants. Give him your funding, give him your resources! He should not have to kill himself to tell his stories!

*Sigh* my heart has been so full since watch this. A huge shout out to Dev and his team.

#monkey man #dev patel #I could go on #but this is tumblr mobile

[spacelazarwolf]

Everytime I see people talk about "passing privilege" in the context of trans men I am instantly reminded of the time I saw someone essentially say (literally in the same sentence!!!) that "passing is a really bad metric for analysing privilege But trans men pass and there for will be seen as men in queer spaces and have access to male privilege"

I still don't know if it's the blatent hypocrisy or the audacity to fit both into one sentence that gets to me more.

the way that people will do triple backflips in order to justify completely ignoring the wide variety of trans men’s experiences is just wild. also at this point i don’t think most people know what they really mean when they say “male privilege.” often i find it’s just a way to separate themselves from whoever they’re talking abt, whether that’s gay men, trans men, men of color, or even trans women. like yes male privilege absolutely is a thing, but male privilege isn’t just when person has different experience from u bethany.

#ask avishai

[lilyginnyblackv2]

Thoughts on Barbie - Feminism, Power Fantasies, Isekai, & Existentialism - SPOILERS!

I really like how the feminism in Barbie is actually kept simplistic. I don’t think the feminism in it needs to be super layered to make for an excellent and engaging movie, especially due to how Barbie the Movie, itself, is structured.

Of course the feminism presented in it is rather simplistic in nature. This makes sense since this is Stereotypical Barbie’s first exposure to feminist ideology and thoughts. She was a doll with a very childlike understanding of how the world works and functions. This also makes sense, since the Barbies in general are all toys geared at young girls. Their world is a reflection of the fluffy promises and hopes that we, as adults, feed to young children (especially girls). This idea that they can be anything and do anything.

But the reality is much more messy and complicated than that. We see the Barbies (and Kens) beginning to understand this towards the end of the movie - after they have all been “touched” by the Real World. They have engaged with Gloria and Sasha and the CEO of Mattel and so on and so forth. There is now no instant change in ideology (like what we see happen when Ken brings over patriarchy to Barbie Land), instead, we see the sort of social change that happens in the Real World - slow moving and made in small intervals. But, at the same time, we see Stereotypical Barbie and Ken working through more complex ideas and emotions surrounding feminist thoughts and ideologies. 

I also feel like it was less the feminism itself that makes the movie stand out in a way, but the way they present it. They don’t hide it behind a dark and grim story, they don’t have it being presented just generally to the audience or subtlety hinted at - instead the movie is bright and colorful and silly - and we have two older women (Gloria and Ruth) guiding younger women (Sasha and the Barbies) through the ups and downs of womanhood. Right, Sasha is a teen girl in the Real World who is starting to understand more and more of life’s complexities, but still missing some of the time and experience that can add more nuance and understanding to many areas of life. While Barbie is like a young adult woman - a college girl that is just getting ready to graduate and really head out into the actual Real World. 

So it’s all about being able to relate (whether in a big way or a small way) to the shared experiences that are being depicted on the screen. It’s a movie created by a woman specifically for women (and yes, that includes trans women - the Youtuber, Kat Blaque, who is a trans woman, did a review of Barbie where she talked about the trans rep and how they got it right - I’ll link her video below). It is speaking directly to us women. All of us.

Which also gets me into thinking about power fantasies, isekai (and reverse isekai) a genre that is about “normal human ends up in a fantasy land,” with the reverse being that a fantasy being (usually of some high power or standing) ending up in the normal human world, and how men and women tend to play into these narratives. 

Many power fantasties that we see tend to involve men - even the ones aimed at women - such as the take I’ve seen of how “teen girl x immortal (usually male) being” in YA novels is about girls seeing themselves in a place of emotional power over men. Superhero narratives are all about normal people gaining superhuman powers - usually in a way that makes them physically stronger - and these all tend to play into male power fantasies and gazes, even when the superhero is a woman. Even if they may touch on feminist ideologies, the way the power fantasy element is handled is still very different from what we see here in Barbie.

In Barbie, we follow Stereotypical Barbie. She is like that ordinary human. Nothing about her really stands out and she doesn’t have any amazing job. That being said, there are elements about her existence that we, as humans, would find to be almost superhuman or advantages over us - never aging, never dying, being able to float from the top of your house right into your car, etc. But, Stereotypical Barbie herself, like within her own world, doesn’t hold any kind of power or high standing. Her journey into the Real World is essentially a reverse isekai. 

In the end, Barbie chooses to stay in the Real World and become a human. She chooses the more flawed existence over the more perfected one (or seemingly perfected one anyway). And I think it is the moments that touch on this aspect of Barbie’s journey which is what makes the movie so special to so many women. Not necessarily the Feminism 101 aspect, which is just an element to Barbie’s journey into womanhood. It’s Barbie seeing the elderly lady next to her on the bench and seeing the beauty in her. It is Barbie meeting Sasha and Gloria and learning from them about how hard life is for women in the Real World still. It is Barbie’s talks with Ruth. Quiet and introspective and filled with a soft patience that comes with age and life. And it is Barbie seeing and experiencing all of these things and then choosing to become human and live in the Real World.

Not because of men. Not because of romance. Not because of any sort of power fantasy that engages in a male gaze and perspective. But because of the women she has met in the Real World. The connections she made with them and the hopes, dreams, and feelings of all girls and women in the Real World.

That’s the moment that makes Barbie so special. That’s the moment that really makes everyone in the theater feel connected, especially the other women and girls present there. That moment is what made the movie for me. The culmination of Barbie’s exploration of existentialists ideologies through a purposefully and specifically woman focused lens. 

#Barbie #Barbie the Movie #Barbie spoilers #Barbie 2023 #Barbie 2023 spoilers #Barbie meta #thoughts post #long post #feminism #isekai #reverse iseaki #power fantasy #existentialism

[kaluxsims]

My Pride post this week is about facial hair...and then some. Beards, mustaches, sideburns, etc are generally associated with men and masculinity, but that's a fairly surface view. Almost everyone has some amount of hair on their face. We're mammals. Being fuzzy is kinda our thing. Hormonal levels and genetics can make that hair thicker or darker on anyone. Today's post takes @simstralia's unisex facial hair and expands on it, giving your sims a broader variety of fuzz for their faces. Like last week, I have more to say after the download.

First, I took the non-meshed beards from @krabbysims' Poppet V2 recolors of @withlovefromsimtown's Beardly set and enabled them for UF as well as UM. Now ALL sims teen and older can use them. Then, I made a few lighter, wispier edits too. They were made especially for sims just beginning transition, just starting puberty, or getting a bit fuzzier as they age. You can see a WIP preview of some of them here.

I wanted to have Body Shop previews for this, but work has been a little more involved than usual this week. The timing didn't work out. I'll try to add them in when I can.

Instead, here's a list of what's included:

NEW - stubble stache

NEW - very very wispy stache

NEW - very wispy chin patches

NEW - very wispy stache

NEW - very wispy stache + patch

goatee chin - "afro" texture

goatee chin - "straight" texture

goatee chin + sideburns - afro

goatee chin + sideburns - straight

sideburns - afro

sideburns - straight

goatee - straight

wispy chin

wispy chin + sideburns

wispy goatee

wispy goatee + sideburns

wispy lip patch

wispy lip patch + sideburns

wispy beard

wispy sideburns

wispy stache + lip patch

wispy stache + lip patch + sideburns

Phew. What a list! Everything is for all sims teen and older (UU), in Poppet colors, and binned properly. You can see previews of the previously existing stuff in Krabby's post. Keep in mind, I only did the ones that don't require meshes. I'm not that confident meshing anything other than clothes and now is not the time to try anything new. Maybe I'll do the meshed beards eventually. Dunno.

Download: SFS or MediaFire

Credits: @withlovefromsimtown for the beards themselves, @krabbysims for the Poppet recolors, @poppet-sims for the Poppet V2 palette, @simstralia for inspiring this in the first place, and @quartta for inspiring the very wispy edits (and for giving me permission to convert something that just didn't work out)

And now for my additional thoughts...

The "bearded lady" used to be a sideshow act, something to be gawked at, and I don't think we've come far enough from that. Women and AFAB people having facial hair is still something many people feel comfortable mocking. That can cause a lot of misery for cisgender women who have more facial hair than they'd like, and it can endanger the lives of trans people who have facial hair, wanted or not. Bigots always feel threatened by people who defy the status quo, and they're empowered when it's not seen as socially acceptable for women and AFAB people to have facial hair.

This isn't just a trans issue, of course. PCOS and other medical conditions can cause darker, thicker facial hair. So can genetics. So can old age. Some shave it off, some accept it, some love it. Frida Kahlo made hers part of her unforgettable and undeniably feminine image.

I really wish I could grow a beard or mustache. Not enough to take testosterone, because I don't really want the other changes that would cause. I deeply envy bearded femmes, because that's my ideal. I want to "do both", and defy the binary. I could probably buy something to glue on, but my skin is sensitive to the point of panic. Simply existing gives me a rash. I also know there are people who might kill me for breaking stupid cultural rules like that. I want to be a gender rebel and look like I imagine myself, but I also don't want my loved ones to suffer if bigots harmed me. I'm in a strange limbo, not really closeted, but also not really feeling able to be myself. I know plenty of nonbinary people share this limbo with me.

I drew a really basic mustache on before going to a drag show last week, but it melted. 😂 I wound up wiping it off on the way to the bar, and not bothering to draw it back on. The drag show, which would be illegal in some other states in the US, was so much fun. It was all drag kings, trans masc, or nonbinary performers. As dark as things are right now, events like that give me a bit of hope. Seeing other people gleefully breaking gender norms was something I needed more than I realized.

Again, my hope is that someday we can all just be ourselves and no one will feel like they have the power to punish others for not being what they see as normal. That's the dream, everyone being safe to be themselves.

#sims2cc #s2cc #sims 2 cc #the sims 2 cc #sims 2 download #ts2cc #sims 2 facial hair #sims 2 genetics #sims 2 pride

[butch-reidentified]

I notice articles of Radfems' teaming up with conservatives to curb trans activists. I thought radfems are left-leaning. Why do radfems team up with the right wingers if that's the case?

This is going to be long but contain a lot of very important information people need to understand about the radfem perspective on gender compared to both the conservative one and the genderist one.

I don't personally know any radfem who would ever do this so the simple answer is I can't tell you why someone would bc I've never even witnessed it, let alone gotten to ask their reasoning. People who call themselves gender critical and get called TERF aren't necessarily radfems. Radical feminism is by definition a left wing ideology. If you were active on radblr, you would see frequent posts calling out conservative women who try to act all buddy-buddy with radfems re: trans stuff. We on radblr do not tolerate that or their presence - at least not in the corner of radblr where I exist. I block right wing blogs on sight.

Contrary to popular trans belief, we don't agree with conservatives on trans matters either. Where conservatives want to reinforce gender, maintain the existence of gender, and are bioessentialist (a term genderists use incorrectly btw*) by nature of their predominantly Christian beliefs, radfems are gender atheists and abolitionists.

*Bioessentialism doesn't mean "vagina = woman, penis = man." It refers to the belief that women (aka female humans) are genetically/inherently nurturing, caregivers, emotional, sensitive, intuitive, quiet, physically weak, like pink and princesses and flowery dresses, etc., and that men are genetically/inherently strong, resilient, tough, outdoorsy, aggressive/violent, stoic, rational, leaders, like trucks and mud and red meat, etc.

While bioessentialism is the belief that all these stereotypes are innate, these stereotypes themselves are what make up gender. "Gender stereotypes" and "Gender roles" are redundant phrases. Gender *is* just stereotypes based on sex. Male aka "amab" people are expected to adhere to the truck-loving, tough, aggressive, stereotypes mentioned above. Those stereotypes are placed based on their physical body - the male body - not placed on them because of their INTERNAL "gender identity." For proof, look no further than the baby gifts an expecting mother receives after finding out the sex of her unborn child: they are not random, gender-neutral gifts, they're blue pajamas with dinosaurs on them because boy.

Radfems want to eliminate gender. We view sex as a neutral biological fact, like your height, foot width, or hair or eye color.

Imagine if, before a baby is born, doctors tested its future hair color, and that information was believed to determine everything about the child. Oh, it's a brunette! So it will be opinionated, love playing with building blocks, enjoy science, and its favorite color will be green! Oh, a blond? Well, better get it yellow EVERYTHING covered in butterflies, and order some craft supplies (blonds are just naturally more creative than brunettes, of course). Be prepared... blonds are soft and sensitive and moody. They're very artistic but struggle to keep up in math and science classes, and are so indecisive!

This is what gender is. A massive, all-encompassing set of traits that are assigned to one sex or the other, designed explicitly by patriarchy to maintain the oppression of the female sex. It defines everything, starting with how people treat you before you're even born, including who you will be expected to be all your life forever, up to what jobs you're likely to get and how much you'll be paid. Society has decided that which type of gametes your body is designed to produce (whether or not you successfully produce them is utterly irrelevant to what your body is DESIGNED genetically to do) determines every last thing about your life. There's a stronger argument for astrology than gender.

So conservatives want to perpetuate gender, keep males doing all those things I listed (which we call "masculinity") and females doing all those things I listed (often called "femininity"). Radfems want gender gone. We want your sex to be no more relevant to your life than your height or hair color. We believe that regardless of whether your body is structured to produce large gametes or small ones says absolutely fucking nothing about who you are, what you are capable of, your likes or dislikes, your intelligence, or anything else.

So, no. I would sooner die than team up with conservatives. We have nothing in common. You are by definition NOT radical feminist if you support gender and will team up with those who do, just to ~own the trains~. That isn't a no true Scotsman, it's just how definitions work.

I am not against trans people. I am 100% in favor of safety and protection for trans people. I simply don't view gender the same way many trans people (specifically those we call genderists or TRAs) do. I don't believe in an internal gender identity any more than I believe in an internal hair color identity. I do, however, believe in EVERY human's fundamental rights to bodily autonomy, healthcare, self-expression, non-discrimination, etc. I believe clothes and toys and hobbies and occupations and likes and dislikes and skills and weaknesses all have zero to do with your sex.

This is my struggle with gender identity ideology: nobody has been able to answer the most fundamental defining question I have about it. If, as many trans activists claim, their gender identity has nothing to do with clothing, nothing to do with haircut, nothing to do with being hairy vs shaven, nothing to do with personality traits, nothing to do with likes and dislikes, nothing to do with whether you prefer dolls or hotwheels, nothing to do with all those stereotypes I mentioned... but it's also not simply a descriptor for one's sex, what is left? What remains to give gender meaning? What is a boy/man or girl/woman? Without referencing any sex stereotypes or sexed body parts, how do you know which one you are?

If anyone could give me a genuine, logical answer to this, an explanation for gender identity that has nothing to do with sex stereotypes and makes concrete sense, on God I would become the biggest TRA on earth.

Because I don't believe that gender is anything more than sexist stereotypes, the idea of gender identity is incompatible with my values. Because I view sex as a simple biological fact which should be as neutral as hair color, I don't think it makes sense to believe one can fully and truly change sex. If you dye your hair blond, the roots will still grow in the original brown color determined by your genetics. You may be able to appear as a blond and convince some people you are naturally blond, but it doesn't *actually* change the reality.

I believe there are people with physical sex dysphoria, like myself and my best friend, for whom medical transition is in many cases beneficial (it was for me) in alleviating those odd "phantom sex characteristic," very neurological-seeming symptoms. But while having a double mastectomy did help the sensations, it didn't turn me into a male human (man), and I have certainly never wanted to be one. My best friend lives a life where everyone perceives her to be female, though she was born male, simply because the medical process she went through to alleviate those neurological sensations resulted in people perceiving her as female (passing). Her "social transition" was not intentional or gender related, just an incidental byproduct of the medical one. It was simply easier, and probably safer, to assimilate into social womanhood than to tell everyone she's actually male despite appearing female, though she still does not have a gender identity, does not wear makeup or skirts or perform femininity, and couldn't care less about pronouns - I use "she" because that's how my brain naturally perceives her. Outside of this concrete, material, neurologically plausible view of sex dysphoria (which still has nothing inherently related to *gender* about it), I don't understand what it means to be trans.

Radfems want both sexes to be utterly free to be whoever they are, without being influenced/socialized into gendered (aka sex-stereotypical) behaviors and preferences. We want males comfortable & safe wearing flowery sundresses and crying often and being homemakers if they wish, and females under zero societal pressure to shave, wear makeup, etc., and totally free to speak their minds and wear cargo shorts without so much as a sideways glance. Conservatives want males to be "masculine" and females to be "feminine," whereas we want "masculine" and "feminine" to be as absurd concepts as "blondian" and "brunettian" sound. Fundamentally, radfems & conservatives exist in opposition.

Anyone who has an issue with trans people, and for whom that issue is so important they'll team up with conservatives just to fight the trans movement, has utterly lost sight of the goal of feminism (if they were feminist to begin with), which is female liberation. Radfems believe gender abolition is a crucial step toward female liberation; working with people who want to enforce gender such as conservatives would be working against our own interests.

I've been on radblr a few years and never seen anyone team up with conservatives. Whoever you've heard about in the news, idk who they are, but I fully condemn cooperation with the right wing and assure you that is not something your standard radfem will tolerate. Much like how most trans people feel about Caitlyn Jenner.

#mine #ask #anon ask #anon #radblr #radfem #radfem safe #gender critical transsexual #gender critical #gender identity #gender ideology #radical feminism #gender abolitionist #gender abolition #trans ideology #trans identity #what is a woman #sex vs gender

[nocturnes-hideout]

Trans Gravity Falls Thoughts

I have so many trans Gravity Falls thoughts.

I don’t headcanon the Stan twins as being trans men, but I do like the headcanon because it means that they named themselves Stanley and Stanford. And that when they were telling Dipper and Mabel their life story, they both, either independently or with some twinpathy, decided to tell the story as if everyone knew they were boys growing up.

I really like the idea that Dipper is a trans boy and Mabel is a trans girl and they’re both going stealth while in Gravity Falls, and even Grunkle Stan doesn’t know. But Stan was there for their birth, how could he not know? Well you see, Dipper and Mabel swapped names. Mabel was born Mason and Dipper was born Mabel, and they just swapped their legal names (with Dipper mostly going by the nickname Dipper). Grunkle Stan was never told any of this and he just assumes he misremembered which twin was a bookish nerd with a birthmark and which twin liked everything colorful and sparkly and he was too embarrassed by this that he never asked any clarifying questions. It eventually becomes clear to Dipper and Mabel that Grunkle Stan genuinely doesn’t know and they decide not to tell him because he’s old and might not be supportive of that. He eventually does find out because Shenanigans (TM) and Dipper and Mabel tell the very confused Stan that they’re trans. There’s a tense moment where Stan processes this information and Dipper and Mabel are scared he’s going to say something awful. But then Stan just exclaims “So I didn’t misremember who had the birthmark!”. Dipper and Mabel ask for clarification, and Stan explains what I said above and also that he’s fully supportive of them. (And also he apologizes to Dipper for calling him unmanly earlier in the summer because he didn’t know he was trans.)

I also like the idea that the Stan twins are both nonbinary but have the strangest ways of explaining/justifying it. At some point after finding out Dipper and Mabel are trans, he offhandedly mentions that he doesn’t have a gender. When asked for clarification, he says that gender is a scam (to sell more bathrooms and clothes) and so he doesn’t have one. (I also saw this one really funny post here on Tumblr that I can’t find where some transphobe comes up to an openly nonbinary Stan and says gets angry at him for telling kids he doesn’t have a gender, and Stan says that he doesn’t have a gender, he lost it and he needs money to buy a new one, oh please, sir, could you spare some money for a poor old man in need of a gender? and he scams the transphobe. ) And he says all this to Dipper and Mabel and they’re thinking that this is the weirdest explanation/justification for being nonbinary, and they briefly wonder whether he actually is or if he’s just misunderstanding what nonbinary is. He isn’t, he is actually nonbinary although that was not the word he used for himself, Dipper and Mabel taught it to him. (He is slightly wrong about his gender though, because he’s not actually agender, he just doesn’t know that you can have a gender that isn’t man or woman, so he thinks he just doesn’t have a gender.)

And Dipper and Mabel think this is the weirdest explanation for why someone is nonbinary, until they meet Ford. Ford says that he doesn’t have a gender because while in the multiverse, it got stolen by a gender thief and he wasn’t able to get it back and decided getting another one was too much trouble. Dipper and Mabel have no idea if this is some sort of joke or a misunderstanding on Ford’s part (that he was always agender and he just didn’t realize until the gender thief incident) or if this is actually what happened. They decide not to question either of their Grunkles because they know that gender can be weird and these are two very strange old men*.

*They would probably describe themselves as old men, but also be aware that the word “man” isn’t quite accurate. They use it anyway.

#gravity falls #gravity falls headcanons #stan pines #ford pines #dipper pines #mabel pines #grunkle stan #grunkle ford #trans #nonbinary #trans headcanons #nonbinary headcanons #queer headcanons

[doberbutts]

To those wondering what I'm talking about re: Harvestella... these are some of the many comments on various articles regarding the game and specifically the interview that announced the non-binary OPTION (meaning if you don't want to be nb you simply don't select it- literally all it does is give you they/them pronouns instead of she/her and he/him).

And this image from Squeenix's official twitter:

Which is the "absolutely terrible" character customization screen that people are complaining about. Pronouns, body type, skin color, hair color, eye color. Less customization than some, more than others. Your clothes change with your job. Pretty sure the models are exactly the same, just one has [small] boobs and an updo and the other has no boobs and a side ponytail.

Reactions from Gamer Bros vary from your typical shitty trans/nbphobic "mental illness" and "doesn't exist" comments all the way for advocating for genocide of Japan and BOTH antiblack AND anti-Japanese slurs at the same time (that one thankfully downvoted by everyone).

But what gets me the most is the reaction to the male body type. He's fairly androgynous and maybe even a bit pear-shaped- it's hard to tell with the way the clothes flare around his waist. But it's "this guy doesn't look like a man" and "I'm being forced to play as someone I don't look like" which is interesting to me because A: I know men who look like that and

B: I've literally always been forced to play as someone I don't look like, it's VERY RARE that I as a black person can find the correct skin tone, correct hair texture, AND correct facial features in a character customization screen. They are always too dark or too light, with european hair textures, and euro or asian facial features... OR the facial features are just shy of exaggerated characiture (looking at you, Skyrim) and thus playing as such is not a fun experience. And that's JUST my reality of being black, not even mentioning gender or disability.

I don't look like Geralt. I don't look like Aloy. I never have. I never will. I have ALWAYS been forced to play as someone I don't look like. Even when I supposed to make this character *me*. Even when it comes close, it still misses the mark. Even this game does- I don't look like that and my hair would never do that and my face will never be that asian-beauty-standard prettyboy look. I can have my skin tone, that's it.

Gamer Bros really are the weakest link, they think if something doesn't pander immediately and directly to them that it's garbage. As if there aren't thousands of people exactly like me who have yet to see themselves in a game, who've been gaming since they were old enough to hold a controller. How many women out there grew up forced to play male characters while being told "the mc is supposed to be YOU :)" until game companies remembered girls exist too? How many companies STILL do this?

You will not die because in this one offshoot Final Fantasy Farming games you're forced to choose between a twink and a high femme, I promise.

[bumblee-stumblee]

Just saw your link from Reddit. But don't you want to eradicate all trans people? Don't you want them to all kill themselves rather than live fulfilling lives? So, surely, their comparison to groups of people who have been persecuted is correct. Because you do want to kill them.

I'm sorry, what makes you think i want to kill and eradicate all trans people? I don't want anyone to commit suicide.

Radfems don't want to kill trans people.

I want to be able to have my female only spaces such as bathrooms, sports, shelters and lockers and spas and so on and so on. Rights and spaces that women fought so hard to get are being eroded. In some places just discussing women's rights and oppression is seen as transphobic.

Watching the MTF subreddit and seeing men talk about how since starting estrogen they feel themselves getting dumber, getting horny at the sight of a cute male, feel themselves getting more submissive now that they are taking estrogen because obviously this is what women are; dumb horny submissive creatures obviously.

This is what these men think women are.

It makes me resentful to read these things and very little people within that subreddit try to contradict what is being said. And why would they? I was a TRA, i know how they talk. The misogyny is rampant within the community.

Women speaking up against gender affirming care such as puberty blocker, HRT, and SRS for children isn't killing them. Kids cannot consent. They should be getting extensive talk therapy to figure out if it's truly gender disphoria or if it's a different problem being masked by this social contagion. Kids with mental illnesses that need to be addressed with actual therapy rather than hormones and surgeries.

Trans people in the US haven't faced the same oppression and systemic racism as people of color.

They haven't been persecuted like people of color & it's a fucking mockery to compare them to the racism, murder and dehumanization and even more of a mockery to call it a trans genocide. There isn't a genocide happening but gosh there's a quite a few in the community that would love for there to be so they could claim victimhood.

Anyway, no radfems don't want transpeople dead. We do want you to stop suggesting GNC kids and GNC women and men might be trans actually. We'd also love it if the trans community could call out the predators and stop telling kids how to get diy estrogen and testosterone. Stop telling them that going through puberty will kill them and stop coaching them on what to say to obtain hormones oh and maybe stop suggesting that they could be suicidal and reinforcing suicidal ideation if they can't immediately get hrt or blockers. It kills kids.

Create your own spaces and stop trying to take ours, stop reinforcing harmful stereotypes, disclose to your sexual partners your agab otherwise that's called rape(obviously in a safe way). Stop assaulting women trying to speak, stop sending women death and rape threats and stop trying to use people of color as well as the atrocities that have been done to them as some sort of comparison talking point.

it's disrespectful as fuck.

#radblr #radfem #asks

[hello-nichya-here]

Pffft in what fucking way radical feminism is about apologizing abuse?? xD

Hun if you have no what you're talking about just don't talk about it, don't embarrass yourself

Glad you asked!

First we have this very thing that you're doing right now, which is shutting down anyone who mentions that radfems can be abusers. Major red flag whenever someone's first reaction to hearing "Someone in your group has been abusive" is to immediately get all defensive and say "NO ONE HERE WOULD EVER!"

Secondly, we have the very thing that made me point out that radfems are abusive as hell. I pointed out that a stupid radfem was insisting that I was being abused because I like kinky stuff, and then had the nerve to go "You deserve to be beaten until you get brain damage." Saying that some people just "deserve" to be mistreated is abuse apologism 101.

And since we're talking about people who "deserve" abuse according to radfems, let's look at the list of women you guys have thrown under the bus:

1 - Women who have been abused by other women. After all, "rape is a male crime" according to you guys.

2 - Women of color. You guys always get hella defensive whenever a non-white woman points out that radfems are often racist as fuck, and pull stuff like basing their list of "how to spot a tranny" on racist shit like literal nazi propaganda posters to help people "spot jews." And let's not forget the large overlap between plenty of radfem groups and white supremacy groups. Oh, sorry, forgot we're not supposed to mention all that so we won't "devide the comunity."

3 - Bisexuals who experienced abuse by a male partner, since we "choose" to associate with men despite having the oppornuity to date just women, like lesbians do (What? That sounds just like incels who are mad women only go to "jerks" instead of "nice guys" like themselves? Impossible! That would mean radfems feel entitled to sex and believe women DON'T get to say no!)

4 - Lesbians that are not "gold star lesbians", aka who have had sex with men at some point. After all, they're inferior since they didn't have stuff figured out right away, or had no choice but to stay in the closet for years and years due to where they live, or, ya know, were raped. Too bad for them, they were touched by man, therefore they're icky.

5 - Asexuals, because you guys will just hate one ANYONE apparently, even someone who just says "I don't really wanna fuck anyone".

6 - Trans women. After all, you guys literally admited that you made up the whole "predatory trans in the bathroom" myth just to have an excuse to hate on them. And let's not forget this also led to shit like radfems trying to spy on other women in the bathroom to "make sure they're really women." After all, trying to see someone naked without their consent is totally what normal, not at all creepy people do.

7 - Kinky women! After all, we are brainwashed by the patriarchy, and need you guys to step in and save us from ourselves, because YOU know what makes US comfortable or not. It's for our own good really. It totally isn't just slut shaming with some pseudo-feminist terms thrown in the middle.

8 - Sex workers. Once again, they need to be saved from themselves - and that rescue includes ignoring them when they say "your way of helping us in dehumanizing, robs us of our agency, and often ends with us being thrown in prison." And lets not forget that some of the anti sex-work laws you guys swear exist to protect victims of human trafficking who were forced into prostitution often end with said victims thrown in prison anyway because surprise surprise, demonizing people for harmless shit makes a target no matter what.

9 - Any woman who doesn't like that you bitches are constantly associating with the alt-right - including the most violently misogynistic members of the bunch - just to get more political allies. Does it ever cross your mind that if THE biggest women-hating scumbags around think you are "one of the good ones" that shows you totally fucking failed to "rebel against the patriarchy"?

And there's also the group that you guys refuse the acknowledge the most! Men who were abused by women. After all, that doesn't work in your fantasy world where men always hold all the power in every situation, and women are always powerless. No way things could be more complicated, even with misogyny still sadly being a thing, no, no. It has to be an Us VS Them.

So, no acknowledging all the times young boys get sexually assault and are mocked for "complaining that they got laid", even when they're minors and their abusers were grown adults. No acknowledging that while women are more likely to be victims to domestic violence, people often refuse to understand that men can also victims of intimate partner violence - even if said partner is a woman. We can talk about abusive fathers, but not abusive mothers. We can talk about how abusive males tend to become cops, but not about how abusive women tend to become nurses.

And, once again, not ever, ever, ever pointing out that radfems are ALWAYS going on about how some people (in this case men) DESERVE to abused. After all, that will totally make it "fair" after all the shit women endured, since THIS is the way to deal with society's problems: you make sure they hurt as many people as possible instead of just your group.

So yeah, you guys are abuse apologists. You always have been. Now either become a decent person or die mad about it, bitch.

#asks #fuck radfems #fuck terfs #fuck swerfs

[a-friend-of-mara]

Hey uh

I'm leaving my mask at the door for a minute

If you enjoy the image of myself I put forward, the happy cheery autistic trans girl who doesn't dwell on her issues

Please just ignore this post

If you are uncomfortable with mentions of self harm, talking about non prescription drug addiction, suicide rates of trans kids

Please just go

Look

I say my biggest fear is that I'll be forgotten

It's easier than saying that I'm scared to death of myself

I'm worried I'll give up on life and stop eating... considering I can't gain or maintain weight I'd have a week before I was dead at the most

I'm afraid that I'll give up trying to look like the person I want to be rather than being stuck, trapped in a body that isn't mine but I'm wired up to like some sick torture method

I don't want to fall into drug use or self harm hoping that it'd pull me out of this pit of self hatred and hopelessness

I don't wanna be another tally mark on the trans suicide charts

I don't wanna die

I feel like I'm suffocating

That I can't move my legs... only the ones attached to me

I don't even know if I matter at this point

I just

I wanna be me

Not some false image that I was born with

Nobody understands how it is for me

My dad almost killed me with th fact he understood so little he put me into survival mode where I cared about nothing but staying alive because of how much damage his insistence that my body was in fact his son and not the cage that trapped his daughter

He used to have twins now he just has one kid with her twin sister... my sister

Now I live with my mom who doesn't understand, how could she? She's never wanted to tear her skin off because it wasn't hers... she understands how much I hurt though

She's able to see through my mask that I'm really suffering inside

Without her yall wouldn't have ever known I existed

You would've heard a news article of a trans kid who killed herself by diving off the balcony at her school although the media would misgender me.

I've almost done it

Sitting on the edge of a lethal drop fighting with myself to not do it

Not sure if I was lying when i told myself things would get better

I'm not sure if they are

Everything just keeps getting worse and worse

I can't even cry anymore

I don't care about so many things that I used to

I used to love

Then I was heartbroken

I used to care for my friends

Until I moved away

I used to enjoy helping others

Now I'm so tired I can't

Just

Fuck

It's kinda funny

How part of me thinks it's all my fault

How I'm not sure if it's something I did

But then I have to think

What could I possibly have done that'd make this torment justified?

How can any higher power exist when I've prayed to every God and Goddess I've ever learned of and not once has a goddam thing happened

How would a higher power let the world get this fucked up

Fuckin hell

My trans siblings are getting murdered for being themselves

Innocent people who live in unfortunate places are being killed because of stupid ass reasons

Fucking hell in America most people aren't free enough to take a month off work without becoming homeless

Decades of prejudice make people think women are weak and need defending but don't pay them well because... fuckin I don't know why!

It's pathetic that men get away with rape while women get away with false rape accusations usually destroying every relationship the man ever cared about

People look at others and treat them differently based on the color of their skin

YA KNOW HOW FUCKIN STUPID THAT IS?!

ITS DUMBER THAN PICKING ON SOMEONE WHO WORE A BLUE SHIRT PURELY BECAUSE OF THE SHIRT

What for?!

WHAT THE FUCK IS ALL THIS FOR?!

The privilege to go through 12 to 20 years of school to earn the right to have to work a job I'll probably hate until I'm like 60?!

Right now I'm pretty sure my life is gonna end before I reach 30!

What's the fuckin point?!

America for fucks sake

The land of the free

Yeah free to work or die because the 0.01% run the fucking nation like their playground

People wonder why I've responded to hostility with hostility in the last 3 years

Simple

I've bottled my emotions for so long the bottles are all full

Yelling and ranting always make me feel a little better

If anyone comments on this negatively I hope you die in a vat of boiling vinegar and drown in the yolks of rotten eggs

That goes for all the phobic people too

If you made it through this whole essay sized emotional breakdown and don't think I'm a complaining winey bitch

I can only say I wish the world was made of more people like you

Alright

Time for sleep

#tw: depression #tw depressing stuff #tw self destructive behavior #trans #trans woman #me #depressing shit #trans struggles