oh but bimbo!reader mssging simon (a military man) how theres a boy in campus (a frat boy specifically) who wont take no for an answer as he keeps tryna pursue you, corralling his frat brothers and even your cheer team to make up situations where you two could have an “alone time.” naturally, simon flies back to put the fear of god into this boy because what is he if not just a boy against simon’s bulk?
and since he is a pissy boy, you receive these messages from him:
from: dickhead
> bitch. you couldve just said your taken
> fucking cunt
to: dickhead
i did but you are just stubborn :/ <
also? it’s you’re* <
and thank you, btw. simmy loves it when i’m a cunt. the fact that you can’t handle me being one just proves his point :p <
from: dickhead
> fuck you and you’re ugly ass boyfriend
to: dickhead
your* 😭 <
simon, who pulled you to his lap the moment the first messages came rolling in, laughs before kissing you on your cheek.
“my smart cookie,” simon murmurs, nuzzling his nose along your skin.
you giggle, throwing your phone behind you before tackling simon and giving him a thousand smooches. simon catches you with ease, hefting you on top of him to slot you two in the comfiest position.
(simon snags a picture of you and him snuggling after sex, careful that all that’s showing is your after-sex glow and nothing more – not a sliver of skin past your marked-up neck – before asking permission from you if it’s alright that he sends it to ‘dickhead’.
your nose scrunches in confusion even as you nod, passing your phone back to simon. simon kisses your lips lightly in thanks, and arranges the message.
to: dickhead
[image attached] <
she’s mine, son. <
your number is blocked soon after by little frat boy.)
Anyways, new DCA au!! I saw this cute tiktok of this walking horror and a little girl being friends and I was inspired!
I'm tagging it Cryptids and Baby AU until I think of something better :D
Toddler Y/N gets themself lost in the woods, walking only deeper and deeper until they meet some friendly puppies! Sun(named by Y/N) comes across this little squeaky thing that doesn't smell or act like food, so decides it must be a baby and took it home. When he or Moon had a baby to lose is beyond him, but its a baby and its his now
“Moom, there’s yellow-eyed creeps fighting ninjas outside the window again!”
Danny sighed, taking a deep breath- in for ten, out for eight- as he set the pot he was cleaning back in the sink. Dan- currently six- came running in from the living room of the apartment, where he was watching TV. Or he should have been if not for the bullshit outside.
He sighed again, picking up baby Ellie- currently closer to two- out of her highchair (even if she could just float out) and let his oldest drag him to the window. Sure enough, another fight was happening, with no vigilante in sight stopping it. Look, he knew most people didn’t live here, but it was still rude.
“Jordan, remember how I told you how violence isn’t always the answer?” Danny asked sweetly, Dan’s expression shifting to a wicked grin as he opened the window. “Feel free to practice tossing some fireballs while I clean up your sister, yeah?”
Ah, the sweet sound of surprised cursing and startled ecto-signatures. Maybe they’d be polite enough to take their spar elsewhere.
I’m just gonna say this, the main reason people don’t like Damian Wayne as a character is the same reason people didn’t like Jason Todd back in the 80s
People don’t like either of them because their favorite Robin (Tim Drake and Dick Grayson) got replaced by them.
Damian and Jason are both really interesting and complex character, objectively more complex than both Tim and Dick, but some people (cough, obnoxious Tim fans, cough, and Dick fans who over sexualize him, cough) don’t see that and just want their little blorbos to never grow into their own character apart from Batman.