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humanrindswrites · 1 year

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all i want is you

summary: reader doesn’t know where she stands with lars

pairing: lars ulrich x female reader/oc

warnings: angst with a happy ending, insecurity, friends with benefits to lovers

word count: 1496 words

a/n: the queue is still going but i wanted to get something new out and this idea is one that kept me up at night

edit: yes i retitled this because someone posted a fic with the same exact title (also this is the title i wanted anyway but it felt weird to name a metallica fic after a u2 song but oh well)

The very first rule that Lars had set when they started their ‘situation’ was for neither of them to catch feelings. And as much as she tried, she’d completely broken that rule.

How could she not? Everything they did together just screamed ‘couple’. He held her hand and hugged her in front of their friends, cuddled with her after sex, played with her hair and said such nice things to her.

But he never introduced her to people as his girlfriend, just his friend. His friend who he would fuck so well and say nice things to before going off to sleep with groupies and forget about her until the next day. She would always tell herself that he was a goddamn rockstar, of course he was going to do this, but it didn’t take the sting away.

She knew what she was getting into and yet she still felt like an idiot for falling for him.

The show had gone smoothly for the band, but roughly for her. Lars had given her a VIP pass before the show but she’d lost it in the bathroom. She felt bruised from the other concertgoers bumping into her and she’d had to wrestle her way to the stage door where a meatheaded security guard refused to let her pass.

“Listen, sweetheart,” the guard sneered, “I told you, nobody gets in without a pass.”

“And I told you that I was given one but I lost it,” she snapped back, at the end of her tether.

“Yeah, you and fifteen other tramps trying to get backstage.”

She could feel her anger start to rise, her eyes pricking with tears as she balled her hands into fists at her sides. As much as she tried to not let the names affect her, she couldn’t stop them from getting under her skin.

Just as she was about to give up and go back to the hotel, the stage door opened and the crowd of girls screamed and shouted for the band to notice them. Lars was first out of the door but didn’t notice her in the pool of people rushing to him for autographs.

It’s now or never she thought.

“Lars gave me the pass that I lost,” she said to the security guard, shouting to be heard. “He knows me.”

The guard groaned and loomed over her. “Look, missy, I’m only gonna tell you one more time: nobody gets in without a pass.”

“Go ask him yourself if you don’t believe me,” she said and crossed her arms defiantly. The guard smirked at her and shouted for Lars over his shoulder, not taking his eyes off her.

“Hey, Lars! I got a girl here for you.”

Her temper flared up again but she shoved it back down, refusing to give him a reaction. Lars finally managed to pull himself away from the fans to where they stood.

“What’s going on?” he asked, confused before finally locking eyes with her.

“This groupie here says you gave her a pass and she lost it. That true?”

“Yeah, I did give her a pass,” Lars said and reached for her hand. “And she’s not a fucking groupie, she’s my girlfriend.”

She wished she could have seen the look on the meathead’s face as Lars pulled her out of the crowd. A smug smile crept onto her face but she couldn’t help but overthink what had just happened. What if he was just saying that to get the guard to leave her alone? He was probably already picking out another girl to take to bed that night.

“Go wait for me in the green room,” Lars said in her ear as he guided her back inside. “I’ll be there in about ten.”

In the green room, she sat on a couch away from everyone else, drinking her third plastic cup of cheap beer and trying to slow her mind. She couldn’t stop fixating on how Lars had finally called her his girlfriend in front of people, but she wasn’t his girlfriend. She was just his friend he liked to fuck.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Lars asked as he flopped down onto the couch next to her, yanking her out of her trance.

“Nothing,” she said. “Just had a rough night.”

“It’s gotta be more than that,” he said and shuffled up to her. “C’mon, tell me. Was it that asshole working security?”

“Well, that’s part of it.”

“What’s the other part?”

She sighed and looked around the room. Nobody there was really interested in what they were doing but she felt like everyone was eavesdropping.

“Can we talk somewhere quieter than this?”

“Sure,” he said, standing up from the couch and grabbing her hands to pull her to her feet.

He led her through the small crowded room with her hand held firmly in his, her nerves calming slightly from his touch. Sometimes she hated how safe she felt with Lars, how being together just seemed right.

In the hallway, a few roadies were still milling around and packing away equipment but they were too focused on their work to notice them.

“Okay, tell me,” Lars said, refusing to let go of her hand.

“Did you mean it?” she asked. He gave her a blank look. “What you said to the security guard.”

He was quiet for a few seconds as his alcohol-ridden brain tried to figure out what she was talking about.

“Oh, you mean when I called you my girlfriend,” he finally said.

She nodded before casting her eyes down to their hands. “Did you mean it?” she asked again. “Do you see me as your girlfriend?”

He paused and ran his thumb over her knuckles. “I guess,” he said. “I know I said ‘no feelings’ when we started all of this but if you want us to be a real couple I wouldn’t say no.”

Her heart pounded in her ears as she let everything soak in. It wasn’t the most romantic way of asking, but she wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. Any feelings of doubt that she’d had over the night had completely melted away, replaced by relief.

“Yeah,” she said as a warm smile crept over her face. “I want us to be official.”

He gently pulled her to him, his body flush with hers as he tilted her face up to his with his other hand. The woody scent of his shower gel filled her senses and she let the world around them disappear when he closed the last gap between them, kissing her softly and slowly.

She dropped his hand and let him fully envelop her in his arms, pulling her closer to him as she tangled her fingers in his hair and kissed him back, drinking him in and not wanting him to stop. They finally broke away for air, resting their foreheads against one another and refusing to untangle their limbs.

“I guess this makes us official,” Lars said as he tenderly stroked her face.

“I guess it does,” she said and leaned into his touch.

“Oh, wait, lemme give you something,” he said as he reluctantly pulled away from her.

“Lars, you don’t need to give me anything,” she said as she watched him reach around the back of his neck. He unclasped the chain he was wearing and took it off before placing it around her neck and fastening it again.

“I want you to have this,” he said, letting his fingers linger on her skin. “So you’ll still have me when I’m not around.”

Tears pricked in her eyes again, this time from joy. She didn’t think that such a shitty night could have turned out so incredible. She immediately enveloped him in a hug, her arms wrapped tightly around him and her head resting on his shoulder.

“Thank you,” she said into his warm skin. “I love it.”

Lars returned her hug and stroked her back, enjoying the moment before it was inevitably ruined by one of his bandmates.

Right on cue, the green room door crashed open, noise echoing down the hallway and disturbing the quiet.

“What’re you two lovebirds doing out here?” Hetfield asked, loud enough for everyone to hear.

“None of your fucking business,” Lars said. “Can’t a guy get some time alone with his new girlfriend?”

“New?” James asked with a laugh. “You mean you haven’t been dating this whole time? Coulda fooled me.”

She couldn’t really see, but she had a good feeling that Lars was turning red in embarrassment. Releasing herself from his hold, she tugged him back towards the room.

“C’mon, we’ll go gross everyone out,” she said as she led him through the door, Hetfield following close behind.

“You’re already grossing me out and you haven’t done anything yet,” he joked.

Lars ignored him and wrapped an arm around her waist, keeping her close to him, as if he was wordlessly declaring to everyone there that she was finally, officially his.

#lars ulrich x reader #lars ulrich imagine #metallica x reader #metallica fluff #metallica imagines #metallica fanfiction #x reader #reader insert #real person fiction #rpf #self ship #*my writing #female reader

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adultswim2021 · 2 years

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UPDATE?

HEY! It's me! The guy who stopped blogging a fucking month ago?? Why did I do that? Well, I'll tell you in gruesome detail with this post. I think I may be repeating myself a little, but here we go, baby!

First things first: My computer broke. On it was a file with about 2-3 weeks (I don't remember) of write-ups ready to go. Once upon a time I used to queue these up in my tumblr and try my best to revise them as I added more posts, but I was tired of having posts go up that were shoddy first drafts because I didn't get to them in time. In order to make them less like dogshit I started hoarding them on my computer so I could make goddamn sure they were suitable for publishing (just regular bad instead of flagrantly bad) before sticking them in the queue.

I also decided that my sloppy data hoarding habits needed to be reigned in. So I started cleaning up my desk and bookshelves to make room for what I was planning to be a dramatic overhaul of my various hard-drives, making it so I would no longer leave my data to chance of going belly up. Part of this was rehabbing a corner of my bedroom where I had stored a bunch of DVD recorders, VCRs, a laserdisc player, etc so I could start digitizing the scads of tapes and shit I’ve collected over the years and perhaps even let some of them go. But I was also devising a system of regular backing-up as well as creating a workflow to make sure that what sorta happened mere days later wouldn't ever happen. It just goes to show you: It’s never too early to start.

I bought a small 30 inch monitor just to plug my DVD recorder into, so I could start digitizing a VHS treasure trove I got for next-to-nothing at a garage sale from an elderly couple that just wanted them cleared out. Much to my dismay, my DVD recorder wouldn't read discs. Then it hit me: I haven't used this machine in 3 years and I think it's been broken for at least that amount of time and I simply forgot about it. So I very proactively emailed a bunch of repair shops and asked them if they'd fix, and I was very specific about this: A DVD RECORDER DECK, NOT COMPUTER DRIVE, LIKE THE KIND THAT RESEMBLES A VCR THAT YOU’D PLUG INTO A TV. Most shops wrote back that they only did computers and wouldn't touch it. One shop said they could fix it. It was one state over (note: it was also one town over; I live on the border of the state). I decided to take it in on a Saturday.

I'd been running my computer ragged at this time, using it to run plex, download large files, rip youtubes, and occasionally edit video. It was one of those things where I was constantly opening my task manager to delete processes that didn't need to be running, trying carefully to not overload it. One night, Friday night game night, to be precise, I got excited telling my friends about an episode of a long-running comedy podcast where, long ago, a guest comically used various now-significantly-more-taboo slurs. The easiest way to share this, I thought, was to whip up a short YouTube video of the offending clips. Oh how we'd laugh! It was meant to be a quick little project before we all got on discord for our weekly appointment of making each other do big smiles. I had all my shots lined up, and I clicked ENCODE. Then my computer went black exactly one second after I clicked ENCODE. It wouldn't come back on. I fucking nuked my computer trying to make a 2 minute video of beloved alt comedians riffing nasty.

I already had planned to take my DVD recorder into this repair shop which I was only going to through process-of-elimination, so I decided to take my laptop in to them as well. The guy running the shop seemed impossibly young. Like, a teenager. He looked at my DVD recorder and his face fell. “Oh. It’s one of THOSE.” YES MOTHER FUCKER I WAS VERY SPECIFIC THAT IT WOULD BE ONE OF THESE. But he shrugged: “actually there’s a guy who comes in and might be able to fix that. It’s not really our specialty. Laptops are our specialty.” Indeed, there were stacks of laptops surrounding me. It didn’t seem like bullshit. So I said “well we’re both in luck because my laptop died on me last night and I brought that as well”. “That is great I love fixing laptops yum yum yum yum yum” is probably what he said back. Look, it’s not like I transcribed our conversation or anything, I’m just relying on my memory here. He probably didn’t say “yum yum yum yum yum” but I do recall him looking hungry.

The thing with this shop, I’d come to find out, is that they would update me rather sporadically with what was going on. When I would call them, they’d say they were in the middle of dealing with a customer and they’d call me right back. They never did. EVENTUALLY I got them on the phone again and finally found out what was going on: the motherboard died, completely. At this point I had bought a new computer so I wouldn’t have to go without one, and my plan was to get the old one fixed and dedicate it to running plex and nothing else, resembling a set-up I was I’d been wanting to create anyway. So I agreed to get a budget pre-owned motherboard for the computer and have them try to fix it just to get it back up and running again, so I could retrieve my stuff off it, attempt to use it as a dedicated plex server, and let it die a natural, less-spontaneous death over however long the new/old motherboard lasted.

Then another blow: my large 4K roku television, which has all my valuable streaming apps (including Plex), spontaneously died. I came home from work after a particularly shitty day wanting to do nothing more than veg out, and it just wouldn’t turn on. It was 3 months after warranty. Even if I had the old laptop back I wouldn’t be able to run my plex server! I’ve been using the paltry 30 inch monitor I bought to use with the DVD recorder that doesn’t work which lead me to taking my precious laptop to the most unresponsive repair shop I’ve ever dealt with in the entire world. Fuck, I miss my old set up, dudes. I had it so good.

This is all not to mention the recent development with Discovery callously removing many cartoons from HBOMax’s servers for a tax write-off. Will this result in the removal of obscure Adult Swim shows that I was hoping to watch on HBOMax? Isn’t it great that the people who built their empire on shoving video cameras in the faces of unwashed mutants to exploit them, are now deleting animated shows, a form of media that arguably takes the most amount of craft, just to save a few bucks?

So basically, especially in light of the tech holocaust I’ve suffered recently, I just don’t wanna have to rewrite weeks worth of write-ups. It would just hurt too much. But if I have to I will. I am just waiting to find out if I have to. I literally have no idea if the write-ups are safe, if the hard drive didn’t get fried, if it can be saved, etc. I literally have no idea!

I haven’t heard from the repair shop since I agreed to order the new/old motherboard. That was, what? A week-and-a-half ago? I don’t know. I just want my shit back. This sucks. This fucking sucks and I’m sorta legitimately depressed about it. I know, it could be worse! But I don’t care! I simply don’t care about other people and their lives! Just mine! Please! Put yourselves in my shoes! Imagine you are as selfish and shitty as me! Then you’ll finally get how this is the worst thing to ever happen to anyone ever in the history of all everything. It sucks! IT SUCKS DICK! IMAGINE YOU ARE A HOMOPHOBIC AS ME AND REREAD “IT SUCKS DICK” AND TRY NOT TO KILL YOURSELF

MAIL BAG

Here is a huge backlog of MAIL BAGS! The first of which were sent to me weeks ago, and the most recent of which were sent to me TONIGHT. Hold onto your bollocks

From LondonArbuckle:

It's all good, take your time getting your tech back on track my man. All your Adult Swims pals, Meatwad, Murderface, Orel, Giles Vanderhoot... they'll be waiting right where you left them. :)

This is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you so much. But you left out ♫KYLE KENNY STAN AND CARTMAN♫KYLE KENNY STAN AND CARTMAN♫

From Kon:

Bring back da blog

I WILL! JEEZ

Any chance you can review your fast food meals while you are out of commission? People love to hear about hamburgers and fries.

Okay, sure.

♫IF YOU SENTTTT ME A MESSSAGEEEE♫ "But the short answers are: yes, I still have it.I’m keeping it for now, but if I do decide to sell it I’ll try and let you know. But like I said, I deleted your message so you’ll need to write me again." ♫IF YOU SENTTTT ME A MESSSAGEEEE♫

I think I sold whatever this was. Times were tight and the co-owner of the item okayed it. Thank you for mocking me for engaging in commerce, asshole

Which will happen first: Adult Swim gets shuttered in favor of an all Toonami block or this blog gets a new update. Just kidding! I wish you the best. And the best is yet to come!

God, I hope so

There actually IS a term/trope for when a parody of something outlives/outnumbers it being used in earnest—it’s called the Dead Horse Trope, I believe. If they’re parodying something that was Never done in earnest, or at least was always pretty niche in the first place, it’s called a Dead Unicorn Trope. ^_^

I wish I could remember what this is in reference to. But thank you. This is USEFUL INFORMATION

That's a pricey fix, kimosabe. Want any computer advice?

“why don’t you try taking some of your own advice?” “Thanks. I think I will!” (The Breeders Cannonball continues playing)

Simpsons?

Has the latest season hit Disney+ yet? Which I can’t watch on my TV right now because the blu-ray player I’m using can only run the pre-loaded apps and it was made before Disney+ was a thing. I need to dig my old Roku out of storage. FUCK!

All this rippin' and dippin' and sippin' has got ME trippin'

You’re a racist

whats your shower routine?

Real talk: I HATE SHOWERING, and I rarely take a full-fledged shower. I do like baths when the weather isn’t too hot, but that’s more of a meditative thing than a keeping-clean thing. My showering routine: I literally stand in my bath tub and basically take a standing sponge bath. It resembles the method of bathing that’s recommended during a drought, and indeed I picked up this practice during a drought to conserve water. But I also literally prefer it to showering. I am a freak

Any word for our friends from across the globe?

yes: “PUSSY”

speak your mind! now that you've been a month away from watching adult swim how do you feel? liberated? confused?

I honestly do appreciate taking time off from the blog, as it could be chore-ish at times. But I also miss it and had a really good routine going before it all went tits up. I’ll ultimately be glad to be doing it again once I get past the episodes I already wrote-up.

Any thoughts the HBOMax/Discovery controversy?

A fatwa on the heads of Discovery. May their remains be eaten by dogs

What's your favorite way to play?

I’ll be honest and gross but with my dick, doing jack-offs. But in another sense, the nintendo switch is fun and the NES/SNES online stuff is so great. Do I use the joycons? are you kidding me? I have a SPECIAL CONTROLLER that lets me adjust marios speed (walking, running, stopping, sliding) and the goombas can barely keep up. No doubt about it... I am a Mario master

#adultswim2021

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ive-tumbled-down-a-rabbit-hole · 3 years

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MariJon Week

Day5: Social Media/Life Swap

It's gone midnight but it's still day 5 somewhere in the world and I've 3% battery left!

This prompt was not playing ball to write but it's done! It's not proof read but it's finished finally!!

Masterlist

Day1 Day2 Day3 Day4 Day6 Day7

____________________________________

Who would have thought a hashtag would have resulted in this. A “small series” of videos. A quick succession of tweets and a “innocuous” request have ended up like this. Even more so that she didn’t really used twitter a whole lot.

Marinette smiled amusedly, her attention to watching the chaos unfold in front of her. If Ayla was upset, then it was her own fault in the first place.

Six months ago:

Miss Bustier’s class were used to Marinette ranting about Akuma designs and costumes. The class had taken to recording these outbursts as a result and posting edited versions on twitter. She had gained her own hashtag because of a particular caped akuma; #EdnaModeHasSpoken

Someone (Alix) had thought it would be amazing idea to ask for requests to have the Parisian Edna Mode “discuss” global villains. Alix and Kim printed off what pictures they could find on the net of them and primed Alya up to record and let Marinette roll.

And oh boy did she roll. She tore into the Riddler’s wrong shade green and purple mix. She praised Lex Luthor on suit colours until she ripped into him on the suit cut. With Prankster she bemoaned the lack of originality of it all, a hybrid attire of Ridder and Joker.

Over the course of a few months almost biweekly Alya posted a new update of “Edna’s” views on the world of villain fashion. The harshest critique came when villains chose poor fashion rather than the poor Akuma victims who were forced by Hawkmoth.

Three months ago:

A new type of request came in to Alya's account. Specifically from @Zombieboy requesting that Edna review Gotham Vigilante's as she had done a tremendous reviews on Gotham's Rogues.

Seeing the pictures Alya had found, Marinette let a high pitch shrill before starting to pace.

"What the… how the… underwear on top of tights?! Where's the Kevlar?! The protection!!!

Traffic light children!!! With not trousers!!!

Is that a tampon on his head?! A swim hat?!

Why skin tight?! They dont have magic! Have they lost their marbles???"

Marinette drew in a deep breathe before releasing

"Capes!!! Are they trying to kill themselves. It's hero 101 no capes?! What are they thinking. They're from Earth … they are from Earth right? Superman obviously copied Batman's fashion sense and he's an alien. The poor man is blind but coping Batman's fashion. It's hideous!!

The only semi decent is tampon head as at least he looks like he has some armour protection. And no Cape. The leather jacket is tolerable but he needs a different cut!"

Marinette's pacing inreased with her disgust and somehow had picked up her sewing scissors and started to wave them around as she got more and more wound up.

"Capes and underwear!! Are they serious about saving the world dressed like that. It's an eye sore. Capes!!

What is with Gotham fashion?!?"

"Em… can you put the the scissors down please?!"

Alya ended up having to stop filming to help Alix try wrestle the scissors from Marinettes grasp.

#EdnaModeHasSpoken #BatmanLostHisMarbles #BatmanVsSupermanFashionCrimes #UnderWearAsOuterwearNoThankYou #CapesNoCapes #EdnaNeedsToPutTheScissorsDown

One month ago:

Some how unintentionally Marinette had managed to get into the middle a Twitter battle between Metropolis and Gotham. @TrueHeir had decided that Gotham had obviously superior fashion crimes than Metropolis stating that being the worst at fashion was a skill that Metropolis didn't have as they had to copy Gotham. Which had caused a backlash led by @BoyOfSteel stating that Metropolis moved away from wearing pants and having a leather jacketed hero first.

The battle online got quite heated until @TrueHeir demanded that the mysterious Edna wade in and settle the debate.

The issue suddenly became that Edna never really had her whole face shown @SassyFox managed to film it in such a way that it was hidden. Edna didn't seem to have Twitter. The way to solve it was to track down @SassyFox.

One week ago:

Jon and Damian via covertly using the Bat Computer managed to track @SassyFox down to Paris. They located a small(ish) area that based on the videos and pictures regularly taken. The pair looked at each other and knew that's where they were heading. They wanted, no NEEDED to Edna to settle this arguement of there's.

Checking that no one was about the pair zeta'd to Paris. They were men on a mission. A mission to resolve this fashion disaster crisis. Was Batman and Gotham or Superman and Metropolis the worst dressed.

They'd spent the day camped out in a local park. But no sign of anyone remotely like @SassyFox. To replenish supplies the pair decided to try out some local cuisine.

Jon insisted on this bakery. All the reviews rated it as one of the best in Paris and he had to try it. Walking in he met with the heavenly delight smells of pastries. He could feel his mouth drooling with the onslaught of sights and smells. He dragged Damian in to look at all the treats hidden behind the glass. Jon was drawn out of his pastry driven haze by a sweet voice asking if he wanted anything. Looking up to the source of the fairy like voice was a cute face. Blue eyes shimmer with amusement and blush coloured gloss graced lips twitch towards a suppressed smile.

"Everything!" Jon responded without thinking. Causing an eyebrow to raise on the girl's face.

"Tt! What Kent means is what would you recommend? Savour and Sweet."

Smiling a broad grin the girl launched into describing the pastries and treats and suggesting recommendations. She packed their goodies up and sent them on there way.

One day ago:

"Morning Jon, Damian, the usual?"

"Please, Marinette. Could you also pack another box on those macaroons you had yesterday as well?"

"Sure things. I take it they were a success?"

Jon nodded in agreement.

Jon and Damian after their first visit and repeatedly ended up at the Dupain-Cheng Boulangerie and Patisserie over the course of the week. Jon was hooked on the sweets and maybe a little (a lot according to Damian) taken by Marinette, the girl at the counter.

"The macaroons were above average."

"That's Dames speak for excellent" Jon cheerful supplied. "Hey Marinette are you on twitter?"

Jon picked up some cursing under her breath something about Alya and she was going to *kill* her before she plastered a fake smile on her face.

"I'm not. My friend uses it all the time though."

"Oh, so you've heard about the Parisian Edna Mode?" Jon cocked his head to the side. Marinette's heartbeat had picked up. Through gritted teeth so responded,

"Yup. I've heard about *Edna* my friends are slightly obsessed with it all. They *adore*her reactions."

She smile loosed at the American pair as the morning rush started to pick up.

"Sorry guys, I best finish your order off and help Maman deal with the queue building."

She effectively concluded the conversation in a polite and effective manner before waving them off with the supplies for the day.

"She knows more than she is letting on."

"Mentioning Edna made her heart beat quicker Dames. Do you think she knows her?"

"It is a high potential. Today we should stay near the bakery as formour hunting grounds."

Now:

Damian and Jon were at the park near the bakery. It appeared Marinette was off today so was missing from the bakery so Jon was "sulking".

By pure chance or coincidence, potentially luck, though the pair saw her enter the park with a group of friends and set up a picnic for them all. One was setting up music to play while others seemed to be playing an elaborate (childish) game of tag. Marinette her self looked gorgeous in a pale pink sundress. She outshone everyone she was with. When Marinette saw them she gave them a wave causing a blush to cross his cheeks.

They were content observing from a distance until Jon grabbed Damian's arm.

"It's her!!!"

Even from the distance, Marinette was mimicking Edna's wound up animated gestures of frustration. Jon could hear the growl and heat in her voice. It was a perfect match. Damian watched while quickly researching Marinette and who the girl filming was. It was all lining up. The final evidence was when a pink hair girl threw herself on Marinette crying out "Em!!" in a similar fashion to the scissor incident. Em wasn't a name but M short for Marinette.

Damian finally had found his mark and was determined to end this war with him being correct. This time it was him dragging Jon towards the girl.

"You're Edna!! You didn't tell us yesterday when we asked about it!"

"Yeah, my gurls Edna what about it. Who are you?" Alya quickly jumped in.

Marinette flapped at Damian, flustered by his bluntness.

"TrueHeir and BoyOfSteel. Edna needs to make a decision on which city has the worst fashion. Gotham or Metropolis. Once that's done this arguement can be settled and we can move on."

"What?!?! Damian??? Jon??? You've come all the way to Paris to resolve that??. What the…" Marinette looked confused at the pair. It seemed extreme to go to so much effort to find her just to settle this.

"You've stalked my gurl!!! You freak!! That's crazy. You're crazy!! All because of an arguement you two got into!!"

"Alya… you may have started it with posting all this?"

Marinette tried to defuse the situation which didn't really work.

"So who is worst?!" Demanded Damian.

"I… errr…." Marinette looked between the two boys. Which ever city she chose wouldn't be the end of this so she needed to think quickly. But she was panicking now….

"Star City!" She cried out.

The boys stopped and looked at her.

"What?!?! No! That's not what we asked. Why? You had to have chose Gotham." Damian was not impressed and about to launch in to integration mode when Alya cornered him and demanded that now he knew that he had to leave Marinette alone.

Jon just stared at Marinette. She had completely changed the rules and cleverly removed potentially tension that could of occured between him and Damian. The bragging right was taken away and handed elsewhere. With that thought Jon gentle grabbed Marinette's hand to get her whole attention. He softly kissed her cheek and smiled playfully at her.

"Sneaky move. Nicely played though Edna."

Marinette grinned up at him, knowing he got what she did before the pair turned around to watch the chaos of their best friends.

#maribat #maribat au #marijon #marijon week 2021 #jon x marinette #marinette x jon #ml x dc #dc x ml

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sckyie · 3 years

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word count: 2.5k

genre + warnings: enemies to lovers; coworkers, office love, alcohol mentioned, swearing

pronouns used: she/her

a/n: hi hi here’s my exchange gift for @coophi! happy holidays and stay safe, i hope you like what i wrote for you! [ this was apart of @/haikyuucreations secret santa ]

You put your forehead on the table groaning at the recent news. "You'll get'em next time, Y/n," your coworker rubbed your back. You sighed louder as you heard something being placed on your desk. You shift your face towards the corner of the surface to see a coffee cup with your name scribbled on the side.

You rolled your eyes and looked up to see the new lead, Kuroo, being congratulated by everyone. "That was supposed to be my promotion," You grumbled. You stared at the coffee up and walked over to Kuroo's desk. Leaving the filled cup, you excused yourself to the bathroom.

Kuroo watched as you rejected his peace offering before leaving the office. He understood how you felt once you heard that you didn't get the promotion. Your papers were perfect, clients loved you both, but the one thing keeping you from getting the promotion was simple. Kuroo's numbers were much higher than yours and it crushed yours.

The thought of endless nights staying late to catch up became pointless. The effort in surpassing him wasn't necessary anymore. All your work, all your stressful nights, everything didn't matter to the manager and execs.

"Hmph," Kuroo seated himself and stared at your drink on his desk.

"Something wrong, Kuroo?" Your coworker peeked beside him.

"Oh nothing," He responds.

You return to your desk, side-eyeing your now superior. You took a deep breath before returning to your paperwork.

Numbers, numbers, numbers. You spent your shift calculating, writing, and fixing errors. The jumble of text on your screen began to hurt your brain for working so hard.

The day dreaded on as the anger in you fumed. It wasn't that you were mad for not getting the promotion. You were furious that out of all people it'd be Kuroo who got it. You despised his snarky, overly confident facade and his petty ways of trying to show you how great he was.

Finally, your shift comes to an end but so does Kuroo's. You two walk together to the elevators though you tried your hardest avoiding him. "Did I get your order wrong?" Kuroo smirked as he pressed the lobby button.

"I don't want your pity coffee," You muttered.

"It's not a pity coffee," He rebutted. "It was a hot chai latte."

"Haha," You mocked. "I don't even like chai."

"Then what do you like?" Kuroo smiled.

"Not you," You immediately walked out of the elevator, making your way to the parking lot.

"Tsk," He was the tiniest bit irritated by your tone but decided to try again tomorrow.

Papers, papers, papers. Endless papers for you to edit and write at home. It was torture but how else could you succeed in your career. Things were already shit with Kuroo trying to be friends with you. Nevertheless, you finished at least ten pages of reports for tomorrow's agenda.

Early morning, you arrived at the office before everyone like normal. Kuroo arrives with two coffees and a small brown bag. He walked over, placing the snack and cup on your desk without a word. He walks to his desk and begins his work without interacting.

You turn the cup to check what it was. "Café latte," You mouthed. You peeked in the small bag to see a blueberry muffin. Before you could return the drink, people began to file into the room. You rolled your eyes and sipped on the drink.

"Success," Kuroo thought to himself as he watched you snack and sip the offerings.

It became a daily thing for Kuroo to bring you drinks. Never the same one twice, but always a blueberry muffin. You gave in to his gesture and thanked him silently whenever he passed by.

Your favorite interaction however was his failed attempt in talking to you. "You come here often?" He asked as he placed your coffee on your desk.

"Considering I work here, yes," You say sarcastically.

"Wow I'm literally so stupid," Kuroo thought. Kuroo saw many opportunities to talk to you more but fell nervous every time. It was always hard for him to get close to someone new. His past relationships had left him hopeless for his own future. The toxicity from the past girls left him thinking he'd never be happy with someone. These past few years, he'd been focusing on himself.

Then you walked into his life. After being transferred to a new branch, you seemed different than any other girl he's met. Kuroo saw hope in you and believed that you could be the light of his love life. He admired your attention to detail, your determination, and well, your beauty. Kuroo saw all your greatest features yet he could never bring himself to tell you his admiration.

One day, you had already a shitty morning and didn't want to deal with anything at work. From annoying traffic to angry clients to the blisters from your heels, you wanted more than anything for the day to end.

A few upset clients later, your head began to pound and you excused yourself for an early break. Kuroo turned to see you sulk away, causing him to furrow his eyebrows.

"What's with Y/n?" He asks his desk neighbor.

"Oh, two of her clients weren't co-operating and it's getting her frustrated," She responded. "She's been having a bad day."

Kuroo looks at your desk curiously and noticed how you had removed your heels under your desk. "Be right back," Kuroo gets up from his desk and walked over to the shared kitchen area to grab some things.

You returned from your short break to be greeted with a small pile of things. Bandages for your blisters, medicine for your headache, water, and a cut-up apple. "Take it easy," You found a post-it on the water bottle. You looked at your screen to see your client queue cleared with everyone on the list as approved. Confused as ever, you make use of the mystery goods to tend to your needs.

"Attention everyone, tonight Ryu here is throwing a little work party at his apartment," Your manager announced. "It is a small goodbye party for him and congratulations to our new lead, Kuroo." You rolled your eyes at Kuroo's name and continued to snack on the apples.

Later that night, you arrived at Ryu's house, catching Kuroo's attention. "Woah," Your male coworker gasped at the sight of you. "Damn, how is she single."

"Hey calm down, Kuroo-san has a crush on her," Other teased.

"Fuck off and keep my love life out your mouth," Kuroo nudges his shoulder. Though they weren't wrong, you were stunning. Dressed to impress and you even put your hair down from your usual updo. Kuroo was left speechless, thus leaving him too anxious to tell you anything.

After one cheesy speech and a big congratulations, the drinking began. Kuroo began to get too into the moment, having one too many drinks. You, however, stayed sober the whole party. You snickered at the sight of your drunk colleagues.

Kuroo's cheeks were bright red and he walked funny. He made his way towards you and you couldn't help but laugh. This was his chance to confess. "I- I- want-" He hiccuped between words. Kuroo began to get lost in thought, forgetting he was drunk confessing. "I- want my- keys- I- need- need to go- home."

"I don't think so," You snatch his keys from the key holder before he could. "Do you want me to take you home?" He nodded excessively as you rolled your eyes. You chat with Ryu shortly before taking Kuroo to your car.

"Kamikita Apartments," You say. You had asked Ryu as you saw no hope in getting anything out of Kuroo. He slowly fell asleep in your car as you drove through the lit city. "I hope you know, I'm only doing this because you're drunk. I still don't like you."

"Mhm," Kuroo says in his sleep. You giggled at his expression all the way to his apartment.

Kuroo rests his arm around your shoulder as you two made your way to the apartment. You unlock the door and Kuroo immediately walks to the bedroom. Once he realized you weren't behind him, he turns back. "Where'd you go?" He pouted.

"Nowhere," You followed into his room. "Where are your pajamas- Oh, here. Change while I get you water."

Kuroo obeys your order and seats himself as he waited for his water. To him, he had already confidently talked to you about how he felt. Yet in reality, he was too drunk to even comprehend the front of his shirt.

"Here," You notice the tag in the front of his shirt as he chugged the water. "Your shirt is backward."

"Help me?" He begged. You facepalm at his tone but agreed. It felt like you were taking care of a baby. Your cheeks flushed pink once you helped him take off his shirt. You stopped to admire his face as you adjusted the middle of his sleep shirt. His hands move to rest on your hips. "It's so cold. Thank you for helping me change. Oh, and Y/n?"

"Y-yes?" You stuttered at his large hands.

"I have something to tell you," His voice started to sound sleepy. "I love you." Your eyes widen and you couldn't show him your shy expression.

"Tell me that again when you're sober," You move his hands away from you. Making your way to the light switch, you looked at the sad Kuroo. "I'll sleep in the living room. Just- go to bed."

Thankfully you had a change of clothes in your trunk that you used to sleep in. You got ready for bed, chuckling at the sounds of Kuroo snoring next door to the bathroom.

You laid silently on the couch staring at the ceiling. Those three words, you never thought you'd hear them from him of all people. It'd been years since your last break up, so you'd always been so closed off when it came to men. After getting heartbroken, you didn't think another man could love you. Kuroo was no exception. Sure he was handsome but you were adamant about staying single for the longest.

The thought of Kuroo in your life lingered up until the morning. He had woken up before you and found himself with a pounding headache. He made his way to the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water. As he drank his water, he spit-sprayed the water out of his mouth when he spots you sleeping. He began to cough aggressively before collecting himself. "Wha- what is she doing here?!" He whispered.

You woke up to the sound of your dying colleague, rubbing your eyes to the bright room. Kuroo walked over to you as you sat up, pulling the blanket to your lap. "Good morning," You yawned. "How's the hangover?"

"What are you doing here?" Kuroo panicked.

"You were shit-faced. This was the one thing I could do for repaying you for the coffees," You say.

"Did I do- did I say anything stupid?" He hides his face in his hands.

"You told me something," You began to fiddle with your thumbs. "I don't know if you meant it or not, but you told me you loved me."

"I...did?" Kuroo slowly moves his hands to look at you. Your face was red and you were playing with your sleeves now.

"Well, did you mean it?" You ask. "If you didn't..."

Kuroo reached over and pulled your chin up with his index knuckle and thumb. "I meant it," He says. "I really did."

Your face grew warmer at his words. "Why?" You sighed. "I'm so mean to you."

"Because," Kuroo moves his hand away to stare at his lap. "I love your smile. I love the way you work. I love how determined you are. The way you sign your papers with a tiny heart. The way you laugh at the smallest things. And...I know you might hate my guts but ever since I saw you, I admired you. You make so many people smile and bring happiness to the room. I thought I'd been on your shit list but I'm glad you took care of me- See that's another thing, you put yourself after everyone else. That's why I gave you bandaids, buy you coffee, finished your quotas for you. I just think you deserve better than what you have right now. And I'm so impressed by you-"

You got annoyed by his rambling and decided to grab his cheeks. You interrupted his words by crashing your lips into his. "You literally talk so much," You pulled away. "Can I talk now?"

Kuroo was stunned at the fact that you just kissed him to shut him up. "You just- kissed-" You pressed your lips on his again to keep him quiet. He deepened the kiss before you could pull away. "You can talk." He smiled as he pulled away.

"Okay," You move from his face. "I wanted to say, you weren't on my shit list or whatever. I was upset I didn't get the promotion and I didn't like your attitude. But, getting to know you I learnt how different you really are. Especially when you’re drunk, it's funny. Besides that, I didn't know how you felt, I didn't notice all the things you've done for me."

Kuroo placed his palm on yours, carefully comparing the size of it to yours. "I didn't think I could fall in love with someone who didn't give me the time of day," He says. You moved your fingers to trace his.

"How are you so sure that you love me?" You laced your fingers with Kuroo's.

"That's the thing, I'm not sure," Kuroo looked down at his lap. "I did all those things just to make your days easier. I thought all the small gestures I did, wouldn't matter to you. That they were just tedious things that bothered you. To be honest, I'm afraid of letting someone into my heart. I was drunk when I told you and I meant it but I want to know for sure that I'm in love with you before anything."

"Do you want to find out?" You say softly.

"Only if you'd let me," Kuroo looked up to see you smiling at him. You nodded and leaned in for another kiss. "Man if only your kisses made this hangover go away."

You rolled your eyes and pressed your lips against his once more. The feeling of his hands move to your waist caused the heat in your face to return. Kuroo pulls you to straddle his lap as he deepened the kiss. Your hands rest on his shoulders while he rubbed your sides.

"I promise to make you the happiest woman in the world," He whispered as he pulled away.

"Do I still get morning coffee?" You giggled.

"And your blueberry muffin," Kuroo chuckled. You smiled before pecking his lips. You rest your head on the crook of his neck as he rubbed your back. "I won't disappoint you."

taglist: @amillionfandoms-onlyoneme @just-a-siiimp @d0llpie @elianetsantana

#haikyuu #haikyu #hq #haikyuu x you #hq x you #haikyuu kuroo #hq kuroo #Kuroo Tetsurō #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo x you #kuroo #forbes dreamz #haikyuucreations

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aria-chicken-flugget · 4 years

Text

Disney World with The Brothers (+ Undateables)

HCs that no one asked for, i’m just self indulgent ✨

Link To The Brothers post

*Based on Disney World Orlando Resort*

The Undateables

Luke 👼

“Don’t hold my hand i’m not a child!”

Would grab your hand in excitement

“I don’t want to go on that boat ride it’s for babies!”

When no one else could hear, holding his arms behind his back whilst running his foot along the ground, blushing furiously -

“MC... will you take me on the ride, please?”

Cotton candy. Loves it. Would get it all over his fingers and all around his mouth.

Would be unable to hide The Brightest Smile TM when that Disney music plays and he sees the castle in Magic Kingdom

“Want to go on Whinnie the Poo?” “That’s a Baby Ride! >:(“

Goes on and LOVES IT

Has sooo much fun just getting to be a kid, holds nothing back after a little encouragement from you

You and Simeon look like his parents when you sit either side of him on a ride lol

Would be desperate to stay even when the park closes

“:’(“ “Hey, it’s ok! We’ll get to see another park tomorrow!” “:D”

Would hold onto yours and Simeon’s hand, humming the theme to Pirate’s of the Caribbean as you leave

“Did you have fun? I thought you didn’t like boat rides.” “That was a scary boat ride - the pirates were horrible.” Blush - deniaalll lol

Would berate you heavily if you tried to get him any kind of toy

Would take the toy home and never let go

Simeon 😇

“What’s a Mickey Mouse? I’m still new to this”

Always smiling and loves that he’s experiencing this with you and Luke

He LOVES Soarin’ as it feels like home but better, as he’s ‘flying’ with you

Trolls Diavolo into going on It’s a Small World After All and acts Innocent TM

Seems pleased enough, enjoys the experience but it’s made better by the company

Makes sure everyone has their belongings and is drinking plenty of water

“Do you need me to grab that for you, MC? I can hold it whilst you go on the ride with Luke?”

Asks Directions TM. Maps don’t work for this boi lol and he gets easily lost lmao

Wouldn’t purposefully ignore The Mom’s Itinerary but inexplicably keeps wandering off, eventually being found with an apologetic smile on his face

Doesnt understand you have to queue to get on until he gets told for the billionth time

Holds your hand as you both marvel at the fireworks, Luke on his shoulders with icecream

Gets Luke an autograph book and gets it signed by all the characters when Luke’s too proud or nervous to himself

“Yes there he is, Luke. He’d love a photograph. Luke? Luke!” *Luke blushing furiously from behind your arm* “SHUT UP SIMEON”

Looks the cutest when in character photos

Realises just how much fun he had when your on the way back from the park

Solomon 🧙‍♂️

Vlogs with Levi sometimes together sometimes separate, but his is more of a troll vlog

To Lucifer on camera - “WHAT ARE THOSE” “They are my crocs! >:(“

Goes FULL HAM TM with you by his side, it’s absolute chaos this boi does NOT run out of energy or things he wants to do

“I wanna go on Jurrassic Park” “... Solomon that’s at Universal.”

Would sneak you away from the brothers, would be very crafty about it to, no one would suspect a thing until it’s been hours since.

Would take the consequences with a nonchalant smile. Does. Not. Regret. A. Thing.

“Itinerary? What’s that?”

“The only good thing about Animal Kingdom is the Mount Everest ride.”

Claims he’s easy breezy about going/where to go in the parks

Actually has very specific favourites and dislikes

“But you said -“ “Yea but who the hell means it when you decide ‘It’s a Small World’” *eyeroll*

Still goes on the ride, and vlogs a meme out if it

Him and Levi SQUEAL at anything Star Wars

When no one is watching, he intesifies the fireworks with magic, watching you beam with amazement is what makes his day

Will try to sneak in a kiss during the fireworks

Barbatos 🕰

It’s the first time you see him smile, like a genuine smile

Is very quiet and is mostly there because of Diavolo, but rather enjoys the atmosphere

Surprisingly loves water rides

Despite being there because of Diavolo, Diavolo urges Butler Barb to let loose and have fun

He does to a degree but never falters his sense of decorum

Similarly to The Mom TM, would be very prepared. Need a napkin? Check. Anti bac? Check. Map? You got it.

When you decide to ride with him, his facade would falter, glancing around BAFFED

“Are - are you sure you want to ride with me, MC? Or did you mistake me for -“ “... Oh, ok.”

Suppresses the intense blush he feels at the revelation that you did, in fact, intend to ride with him

When he relaxes, may occasionally casually hold your hand, making you double take at his nonchalance

Would indulge himself with viewing the experiences you share in the different timelines in which you still go together

“MC, i’m taking you to dinner. If you’d like of course.”

Would be such a gentlemen and so relaxed at night, out of habit when he’s not with Diavolo, he can just simply be himself.

Will hold your hand as you watch the fireworks at dinner. A smirk on his lips before planting a lingering kiss on your cheek to both startle and excite you

Diavolo 👑

“Disney world?! DISNEY WORLD?! That is the no.1 place for your dreams to come true!”

Sincerely believes that is literal

That Laugh TM with his arms spread wide as he sees the Park entrance

Takes photos everywhere, even infront of a trash can - initially thinking “it’s a part of the experience!”

Gets too excited to follow Lucifer’s Itinerary

“Diavolo! You’re not supposed to climb onto the parade floats!”

Would scoop you up onto his back without warning, a ball of energy as he bounces around the park with you this way

“Wow! What is this delicacy?! It’s delicious!” “That’s just a Mickey shaped napkin, Diavolo...”

Would buy all of the balloons from the vendor, looking like a lunatic

“Where’s he gonna keep all those -“ “Don’t even ask.”

That one person who actually enjoys It’s A Small World After All. Sings along and doesnt stop for the rest of the day

Would wear several sets of Mickey ears at once, not realising or caring that it’s not how they’re meant to be worn

“Oh? Of course we can ride together, MC!”

Would smile that much more brightly as you suck up the enjoyment alongside him like a couple of sponges!

“That - that’s not a ride Diavolo -“ “But we must ride this monorail. It is a part of the experience!”

If he’s feeling comfortable, will wrap a strong arm around your waist, pointing out Tinkerbell to you when he spots her before the start of the fireworks

The link to the first post with The Brothers is above! Will edit both but have them for now and again, I hope these make you smile! ☺️✨

#obey me #obey me headcanons #obey me shall we date #om! swd #Obey me Luke #Obey Me Simeon #Obey Me Solomon #Obey Me Barbatos #Obey me Diavolo #om! Luke #om! simeon #om! solomon #om! barbatos #om! diavolo #Obey me Brothers #Disney Headcanons

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thedevilliers · 3 years

Note

Hey, I've been reading your story for a while, and I'm enjoying it very much. Following the De Villiers has been so fun, and you've inspired me to create my own royal Simblr!

Can you maybe share some tips about what to do with your royals? I'll be posting my family within the next few weeks, and I have already planned out several engagements + events, including visits to parks/schools/hospitals, parties, and news surrounding a royal pregnancy. I've also planned out the first arc. I don't know what else to do, and I've barely started! If you have any tips related to the beginning of your Simblr that you didn't cover in your other post, I would so appreciate them. I want to get all this nailed down *before* posting, so my blog is the best that it can be.

Also, if you have any advice on how to make things as efficient as possible (especially regarding posing sims, editing/writing posts, etc.), I would love that! I want to cut down on time wasted wherever I can.

Thank you!! :-)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 me?!!?!?! ME ??????? omg 🧍‍♀️ thank u for reading my story 🥺 and AAAAAAAAAAAA your own royal simblr !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ill answer everythin under the cut !!!!! spoilers: it got long sorry

first of all, remember we ALL started somewhere. you can look at my first like... fifteen and even MORE posts and they are BAD. oh my gawd idk why i thought they were good, but hey! i learned things from them. you will more than likely change your mind about certain things from the beginning of your blog to who knows, four months from now. don’t focus and worry a lot on ‘perfection’ and setting up ‘high standards’ from the beginning. treat it like a learning curve! this is something we all do for fun, so don’t get stressed a lot on it. you can always change and adapt things and that’s no problem!

i love lists, so im gonna list a few things of advice/tips basing myself on what you said!!!

i personally don't do engagements anymore, so i can't really help you in this regard of even more activities you could do 🧍‍♀️ what i could recommend for people to get to know your characters' personalities and private lives and grow attached to them, add in BTS posts.

continuing on my BTS’ post thing, they are a GREAT way to show more than what the public sees for your royals. because from a press and public point of view, you don't really know 'what goes on behind closed doors'. they could be all happy in public, but in privatE??!??!!?!?

as i said in my starting out guide, i did have around ~15 drafts done before i started posting. just so i could not stress about “oh my god i dont have any posts for tomorrow”. a LOT of ppl do posts and queue them as they go, and they have MANY posts done and usually they start accumulating and they are MONTHS in advance compared to what they’re currently posting. if this method works for you, you can definitely use it!

please, please please read your dialogue OUT loud. is it possible to say a 2093023902 word sentence without a singular use of punctuation? do people in this age and era really talk this way? also please if possible use correct grammar. just a little pet peeve, it can take a reader out of the immersion your story gives them.

we all have our lil dialogue habits. mine is starting sentences with “oh” and the infamous dash “—”. others use ellipses. just make sure you aren’t overdoing it. for example, doing a sentence like “oh— there you are. i was uhm— looking for you. how—how are you? its—i mean where have you uhm— been? yes—ive—ive been fine. you? i mean— your mom” ....just no 😔 it doesnt read well at ALL

you can always do lil filler posts, dont tell anyone tell you otherwise. post a little simstagram post, a little family portrait, updated portraits post, family hanging out, kids hanging out, etc.

for posing sims, i do try and remember where MOST of my poses are in the ingame list. usually creators’ correctly naming the poses helps a lot. for example i need a Mel Bennet pose; hers are usually ALL in the same spot and have the same lil aqua bg so i can easily find them. sometimes, i dl pose packs VERY specifically for a certain scene. am i gonna use them again? no. so i open the .package file in sims4studio and rename them to “00 for emi scene [rest of the og name” so when i open my game, they are around the top of the list! no more scrolling and i easily know what i need it for.

dont be scared to plan things that are happening MONTHS from now or anything in detail. some ppl dont like planning things in detail, or even dont like planning things AT ALL or things that arent happening say, in over 2 weeks because idk, they get bored. i recommend at LEAST having a list of things that HAVE to happen so you have ‘goals’ and you slowly plan out how you’re gonna get there. at LEAST theres some level of planning there. if you’re posting and PLANNING as you go, there’s gonna be holes. and it’s gonna be obvious.

editing wise, i don’t do much. my reshade does most of the work, i just add in my psd, add text and done! this is easily the fastest thing you will ever do.

if you get inspired by someone else doing, idk, a certain layout for the portraits, them adding little things to their captions, a certain edit, etc. if you want to do something similar and you ARE very much aware you were inspired by them, credit them in the caption. i beg. its free, its the nice thing to do, bc if not its rude.

if you get inspired by a certain storyline someone else did and you notice yours is gonna be similar, go ahead and send them a message to let them know and if they have any tips or feel uncomfortable with you doing this. simply put, if you don’t, you’re gonna look bad. we are all bound to do same storylines, such as assassinations, shooty shooty’s, stalkers, first loves, accidental babies, etc. but what changes is how each person approaches it. no ones gonna do it the same way as you and others. if you CONSCIOUSLY start copying else, stop it. and you could even be unconsciously be inspired by someone else too. it happens! just make sure you are able to look at the bigger picture and realize “hey, i’m doing something wrong”

same thing with dialogue. you like a line someone else said in their story? don’t just... steal it and incorporate it into yours word BY WORD

OVERALL: you can be inspired. give credit where it’s due. and don’t copy because someone else is doing ‘something others like’ and you want others to like your story. no no no !

im adding this AFTER i posted it but, be yourself. in the way you interact with others and send questions, etc. don’t try and copy someone else’s personality because they are liked and essentially absorb them. be yourself and i’m sure a lot of ppl will like you the way you are : D

for my writing dialogue etc, this goes back to my point 8. i use milanote, its free and you get 200 free thingies to use, and i plan out how every single one of my posts is gonna go. so i just have to go ingame and i already know what im gonna do. no thoughts, just taking screenshots. for example, this is how a part of my part 2, chapter 3 posts layout looks like. every square is a post that has what is happening, who is in it, what is gonna be said very vaguely, etc:

11. and the most important tip! don’t compare yourself to others. i did it at the beginning. i think we all did at one point. its not good for you at all. please always remember we all are here for share our lil stories with each other and it’s not easy get a following. you’ll get there and its gonna take time. be patient, be nice!!! and i cant wait to see your story!!!!!!!!!!

#ask #howto #dam. it loNG #Anonymous

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phoebehalliwell · 3 years

Note

Now I’ve got ColexPaige on the brain and now I’ve got a hypothetical! What if Cole and Phoebe ended things when she “vanquished” him in Sleuthing with the Enemy? Down in the dumps, but not wanting to give into evil, Cole then decides that he’s gonna get some space. He quits his job and takes a job as lawyer (or maybe a social worker bc that would be interesting) at social services! Queue work rivals Paige & Cole! And Paige stealing the book is when Piper and Phoebe rediscover Cole. And there are MANY feelings had by all 😂

omg okay for starters b4 i even received this i was already percolating on a paige/cole edit issue is like. there really aren't any s4 clips from the remaster left on youtube meaning i gotta grab whole ass episode meaning i gotta like. know which moments to grab 😓 so um. if u have any fav paige/cole moments!! send em my way!! but yes. because like. we'll say cole and phoebe blew up in his face. as it turns out, women do not like it when you manipulate and try to murder them. and their sisters. but like who's counting. cole's got that fuckin post breakup vibe he's feeling ugly and stupid and lonely but like. there's also kinda an epiphany happening. because he felt best when he was with phoebe, because she saw him as a good man. he liked being seen that way. and like. he can't really get phoebe to see him that way because of the whole tried-to-kill-her-multiple-times-things and also she swore if she ever saw him again she'd vanquish him on sight (au specifically were instead of faking cole's death phoebe didn't have to make the call after cole saved her from krell the zotar (?? zotar the krell ???? prue is a scorpio ❤) and cole got the hell outta dodge avoiding a vanquish. he shows up in the movie like hi phoebe 😳 and phoebe meets him at the mausoleum punches him again and threatens to throw the potion but she doesn't so cole's thinking he's got a chance so he pushes his luck Then phoebe throws the potion and cole shimmers out just in time to dodge it so um. maybe not!!) But cole's thinking if he just like. Is A Good Man. people will look at him that way. so now all he needs to do is like. be a good man. which is easier said than done.

so we'll say he quits the da job because it was given to him through demonic connections and he like. gets a job doing legal work for social services because like. what's better than helping people?? like he does have an actual law degree he might as well use it. and it keeps kinda going like how it went when he worked in social services for like ten minutes in s4 like. like he's like yes i'm gonna be a good person and help people : ) and then keeps seeing shit like hey!! what the fuck!? this guys fuckin sucks ass oh my god this guy fuckin sucks ass and like. my god does he want to murder them 😐 but like we'll say phoebe had some crucial line like how good people don't murder. so he's like hhrrrrnnnnghhhh. and like. paige is canonically bad with paperwork and deadlines and all that and cole's just like very terse so when paige misses the deadline for getting some important paperwork to him he definitely snaps and paige isn't one to take that shit laying down she's like jesus fuckin christ man anyone ever told you you're a horrible fuckin person? just like god awful? fuckin demon i swear and cole is like 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡 because that's not the point of this!!!! aaaaaa!! and so the next day he's up at paige's cubical like hi. i want 2 apologize. for being. rude. yesterday. and paige is like okay... because cole clearly has more to say and cole is like yeah it's just like i'm trying very hard to be a good person and you're kinda fucking ruining it w your lack of organization and it's really making it difficult for me so yeah. and paige is like that's your apology? that's your apology? have you ever apologized to anyone before in your life? and cole kinda makes this face because looking back on it um no. he hasn't. and paige kinda sees that like what the fuck?? for real?? and she's like okay well watch and learn. cole. i'm sorry for missing the deadline with the paperwork. i've been really scattered lately and i know that's not an excuse; i've already called the whoever and filed for an extension, giving us an extra week of wiggle room. the paperwork is currently complete on your desk. it won't happen again. i'm sorry. and cole's like good. and paige is like dude!? and cole is like i mean um. thank you. i accept ur apology. um. thanks. and paige is like yeah. you're welcome. dick. and cole is like 👍.

but from that point on paige is really intrigued with cole because she always just assumed snooty big wig with a big expensive law education who never cared about anyone and was really only doing this as some type of penance someone was forcing him to pay because like. god that's his vibe he really does not seem like. capable of doing any of this right. but the more she looks the more she sees him like really fucking trying he's just unbelievable lost and she's like huh. so you know she throws him a bone like hey you know like this is this and that is that kinda explaining this that cole doesn't get because he's clearly new to this job and sees kinda new to the whole concept of being a good person and paige has been here a while so she can like help. and then bonus is like. at the office christmas party or something and paige and cole are now basically kinda like friends (and paige's gay blonde friend and her also gay boyfriend with the pizza face. they r bi4bi And t4t. and they are paige's besties. and by extension cole is friends with them. they're all like in love you're in love smoochie smoochie ahaha office romance and both paige and cole are like shut up!! and like. again. cole is kinda only doing this because he wants someone to look at him like how phoebe did. look at him like a hero like a genuinely good man. and paige doesn't look at him like that. she sees him as he is, a kinda bad person maybe just mediocre trying really really hard to be good like does he really want someone to see all the milage? someone to know how hard he has to work? no. he just wants to be the white knight the angel. that's what he wants.) the point is maybe they have like that cheap office champagne or something happy holidays and cole offers to get paige a glass and she's like no i don't drink and cole is like oh i didn't know and paige is like haha yeah i mean it's not something i talk about a lot i have kinda a drinking problem in the past did some things i'm really not proud of you know and cole is just kinda like. like the other shoe drops the lightbulb flicks on. because he always assumed paige was just always a good person. but as they get closer and cole finds out more about paige's past he learns that she wasn't always like this like she has done some awful shit too!! she wakes up every morning and chooses to be good. like him. it's not something you're born into. he thought you had to be born good and he could fake it and try to fit in and like put it up as an act but that's all it'd ever be an act to receive love but knowing that it's a choice for everyone. that no matter how you're born, you have to wake up and choose to be good every day. like. that's what he's doing. is he good?

and then we're like teetering on the edge of a paige/cole relationship but they have like a really solid friendship and if they cross that line there's no coming back and they're like coworkers you know so neither of them have the nads to make that jump even tho their friends are like do it do it do it And Then. prue dies. paige becomes a charmed one. what? she steals the book. she's reading it at work. she hits the page phoebe made solely dedicate to cole's human side, with the belthazor page right next to it. what the fuck?? busts her way into cole's office and slams the book down on his desk like this you?? and cole's like you're a charmed one?? and paige is like um hello you're a demon???? that's clearly the bigger reveal here??????? they like. have to like take a solid hour to clear the air because like. cole's gotta come clean paige is like did you try to kill my sister?? and cole's like okay origin story time. and it's funny because it's like. insanely close to like what paige thought was his origin story the only difference is instead of his really rich and pretentious douchebag family being metaphorical demons, they're just literal demons. but she still doesn't know how she feels about that. but um here's piper and phoebe like where's the fucking book!??!?!? paige !!?!?!?!? and spot cole and at like kill kill kill piper freezes the room and them immediately tries to blow him up but paige gets in front of him and orbs him out, dodging piper's blast and like time resumes because piper's powers r still on the fritz and cole just sees his filing cabinet up in flames, his ex girlfriend, and paige's hand still on his chest and is like oh boy.

#charmed #paige matthews #cole turner #paige x cole #margaretsminiessays #💌

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ratsetflummi · 2 years

Text

tagged by @mordcore thank you

1. Why did you choose your url?

oh, boy long story. when i made my fanfic account in 2011, i got stuck on what username i should use, so i spent a day ruminating on it. that was when i was drinking coffee every day before school even though it really didn't sit well with me. so i was sitting in class, vibrating, and i was thinking to myself that i was being a nervous little bouncy ball, and hey, that works as a username, except that was too long, so i had to shorten it to little bouncy ball, but also i'm german and it was a german website, so i went with kleiner gummiflummi. but these days even that is too long for most websites, so i recently workshopped it with a friend. she suggested ratzefummel, which is a colloquial term of an eraser, which i'm pretty sure she just suggested to annoy our anglophone friends. except ratzefummel is taken on a lot of websites, and i kinda wanted to keep part of my old name, so i mixed them, and now it's ratzeflummi

2. Any side blogs?

technically i have like 12, but some of them are group blogs, and a lot of them are either empty or have like two posts, but these are the ones that i actually use(d): podcast fandoms: @aaand-you-float-really-good queer stuff: @quiet-queer-questgiver achievement hunter: @gaychievementhunter the penumbra podcast: @penumbrasmooches detroit become human: @gavino-reed

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

don't make me think about this. i've been on tumblr almost every day for eight and a half years

4. Do you have a queue tag?

nope, because pretty much everything would have that tag on it. i honestly don't know why people use queue tags, they seem extremely pointless to me

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

because a fanfic author i liked linked to her tumblr in her fanfic profile, and tumblr wouldn't let me look at her blog without making a blog of my own

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp?

it is my cat. i used to have fandom characters as my icon, but then i kinda fell out of fandoms altogther and kinda hopped around between different fandoms every couple weeks, so i switched to something neutral that i could just keep. i don't know why i specifically went for my cat. that was just something i had saved on my pc

7. Why did you choose your header?

a few months ago there was discourse about minors thinking that you must list as much information about yourself as possible, and how it's important to have your age in your bio, so minors can tell at one glance if you're safe to talk to. so i put in my bio that i am 12, and i put in my carrrd that i am 54 (not that anyone ever looked at that), and i picked my header to go with that, because people can fucking lie on the internet. if someone means you harm then they are probably telling you any lie necessary to make sure they reach their goal

8. What's your post with the most notes?

i kinda went on a purging spree two years ago, so now a lot of my high note count posts aren't linked to my blog anymore, which makes it really hard to find them (whoops. didn't even do that on purpose) across all blogs, my podcast sideblog has a post with 1500 notes, which is an audio post where i edited a bit from jonny sims' bloodborne stream together with a bit from the magnus archives to make it sound like the stuffy spooky librarian is flirting with a cat on main i have almost 400 notes on a post whining about how much the loki series sucks, followed by a 360 note post about bernd das brot

9. How many mutuals do you have?

15.

10. How many followers do you have?

198 (but i also went on a bit of a purge there and softblocked any blog that hasn't posted in the last year, because dead blogs don't really count as followers to me)

11. How many people do you follow?

87 currently, although that number fluctuates between 50 and 150

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

oh yes, almost certainly. i couldn't think of any of them off the top of my head, but surely i did

13. How often do you use Tumblr everday?

several hours. i usually scroll back down to where i left off the night before

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

not really? usually when someone's being a bitch i just block them. but people don't usually come at me because i mostly keep quiet

15. How do you feel about 'you need to reblog this' posts?

i will go higher up in the reblog chain to avoid "you need to reblog this" comments. if it's part of the main post then i will avoid reblogging it altogether

16. Do you like tag games?

yes, kinda. the only problem is that they always want me to tag people in them, and 1) i don't know anyone, and 2) most of my mutuals are mutuals with each other, so all the people i could tag are usually already tagged in the post that i'm tagged in

17. Do you like ask games?

yes

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

risu, unfortunately for him

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

yes, i've had a big ol' crush on lock for well over a year now,and i have told them this before

aha, for once i was not tagged by the squad, so therefore i can tag the squad @thisfairytalegonebad @dappercyborg @porcelainbluejay @supericelight @sniddies-snake-tiddies @chaotic-carnifex @agentduckorico @eroticcannibal @enraged-fangirl-and-co

#yes i am answering this #yes i still have two-month-old asks in my inbox #don't look at me #tag game

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emerald-studies · 4 years

Text

Diverse Perspectives | Discussion 1

****Whew, Tumblr deleted this entire post that was in my queue, so if there are mistakes in the transcript, sorry. I still highly, highly, suggest you read as you listen. I’ve added resources so you know what we reference in this discussion.*****

[ It is required to participate and watch/read these discussions, in order to follow me. Participate or get tf out. We aren’t performative in my lil’ area on Tumblr.

This discussion isn’t representative of an entire population or meant to be super professional. It’s to share different perspectives and also is an opportunity for me to practice what I preach: intersectionality. If you’d like to participate in this series please send me a pm or an ask and I’ll get back to you ASAP. We can do a written, audio, or video interview.]

To open this series, I interviewed Rachel, (AKA @reality-wont-ruin-my-life / @emmettisapowerbottom) for her perspective as a Jewish woman.

youtube

Transcript:

I recommend you read while you listen, I’ve made some clarifications because my ADD brain is shitty when I try to speak words.

(it has also been slightly edited for clarity)

Faith: OK, thank you for doing this with me, so I just want your perspective because you are a Jewish woman.

Rachel: Yes.

F: And I feel ... we don't talk about anti-Semitism enough in the right spaces.

R: Yeah.

F: I think we talk about it ... in history and then, ... it's not even called...I don't even remember it being called anti-Semitism, it was being ... framed as ... with this thing of the past that is around. So, first question for you is,

Do you believe that by learning about the Holocaust in such an apathetic bland setting, which is a classroom, we are being told anti-Semitism is a thing of the past?

R: Um, I think it has less to do with where we learn, because I do think it's really important to learn about ... the history, but I think the way it's taught is really where the issue comes is that they kind of teach it as this one event that's kind of a standalone thing instead of saying ..., hey, this is a historical pattern. So a lot of people seem to think antisemitism started with the Holocaust when there's thousands of years of history of it before that. And then they think it ended when the US joined the war, which the US didn't even join the war to help the Jews. That's a complete lie. So I think it's important that it's taught. But the way it's taught is, you know, you read The Diary of Anne Frank and you look at a few power points. And everyone stares at the Jewish kid ... us ... to--

F: Omg not to make it about me, but I remember watching ... a Jackie Robinson film and (also) learning about slavery in seventh grade. I was ... the only black person in the room. And they're always ... this *looks behind* it's just ... what? (are you looking at?)

R: I think every kind of minority group has that experience where the class talks about something and just ..., you know, everyone's staring at you.

F: Yeah. So, yeah, I agree with you. ..., context matters and I think ... even the pattern or how even the Holocaust even happened, ... it shouldn’t have happened and we're told we're learning about this, so it doesn't happen again, but what are these teachers telling us? They're not telling us what was the process of basically convincing a whole population that it's OK to kill, mass kill, people? So I feel ... it's not really seen in that context. I mean, at least I went to many different schools and, you know, different history classes. And it never really seemed ... it was deeper, ... it was more of ..., you know, this is your homework is about the Holocaust. It's ... this shouldn't be ... it shouldn't be ... that. I don't know how to explain it ... this is more than just ... a piece of paper that we fill out.

R: Definitely, yeah, I think people kind of get lost in that and think it's just this one unit instead of ..., you know. It decimated ... a third of the world's Jewish population and 90 percent of the Romani population.

F: Yeah, and it, I think that also isn't talked about because I did a whole presentation on, ... the experiments that took place and they took, ...disabled people or differently abled, whatever you prefer...and then I know, ..., multiple minority groups were put in those camps. So I also think it's interesting that I mean, .... I don't know how to explain it, I think by making it just about the Jewish population, it's ... “better” for people. People ... they can put it in a box, right, ... this won't affect me if it happened today. But, you know, if you have a family member that's a part of this group or part of the LGBTQ+ ... they were affected. So it's ... this* isn't just .... A certain people's problem. (*The Holocaust)

R: But at the same time, I feel ... especially when learning about and teachers tend to take her Jewishness out of it so that people can relate to it, ... she was a Jewish woman ......don't.

F: Yeah, it's ... you can humanize someone by just seeing them as human, you don't need to make them ... you don't need to make them fit, you know? Um, do you think the Internet has helped or hurt the Jewish community in terms of information and accessibility to the general public?

R: I say a mix of both because for me personally, ... growing up, I really separated myself from my Judaism at home. I was ..., oh, I don't you know, I think this is something you want to do as kids. It's ... you do your bar mitzvah and then you're just ... gone for awhile and finding ... Jewish people on the Internet really helped me reclaim my connection with my family. And now I study it ... it's my college degree... is Judaic studies and the history. But I've found that it's been really helpful for me finding ... Jewish people on the Internet, but at the same time...... conspiracy theories are a huge thing on the Internet, and so many of them are based on anti Semitism without people even realizing. So I think it's the spread of information and the ability to scapegoat groups from the Internet hurts Jews a lot, but it also really helpful for us in finding community within ... Jewish people.

F: Yeah, ... yeah, I can definitely see that because, I mean, I think that's...I've only ever heard the “pro” of social media is meeting people, like-minded people or different people, which I mean, thank you, Tumblr, because of this... but that's the only pro I've ever heard, is just meeting people. So I just think it's interesting that ..., ... there are all these negative things, you know, ... anti vaxxers..Flat earthers, ... “climate change isn't real”. It's just .... At least we get to meet each other? Look on the bright side, I guess.

R: Oh, yeah. You know, take the good with the bad or whatever. I have, but not to the extent some other people have, because I don't really have ... the stereotypical Jewish, which is ridiculous because you come in every color and everything. And also, I do want to say I don't speak for every Jew, every experience, ... I'm an upper class white woman living in Oregon. So, you know, I have a very different perspective than say and also I'm a certain branch of Judaism citizen. So I have a different perspective from ... a Black Orthodox Jew from New York, it’s going to be a very different lifestyle. So I haven't had death threats anything. I just...a lot of middle school and high school was ... when people would find out I was Jewish. ... Can I say, ... a Holocaust joke.?

F: Ugh

R: No, know, that's ... everyone when you're a kid, that's their first reaction. When you say things ..., oh, now I can make this joke about ovens and ..., please don't do that.

F: Oh, my God, that's so awful. I don't know why they do that.

R: And then all of a choir director once was ..., Oh ... because I got this solo in this piece that was about Anne Frank. She's ..., Oh, yeah, she even looks ... Anne Frank. I was ..., this was on the radio.

F: That's that's not OK. Oh my gosh. It's .... Look, look, she's not ... this, ... she was gorgeous, obviously, I think everyone's gorgeous, but ... she ... I've seen, ..., her eyes on people (edit: I meant she has common features, like everyone else) ... she's not. Yeah, her features are....Oh, my gosh...., it's just because--

R: the things that are considered stereotypical Jewish features are largely Middle Eastern features, ... it's thick hair, ... kind of bushy eyebrows, the nose with the bump, curly, dark, untamed hair.

F: Yeah, and that's just ... such a large (edit: large population), stereotypes are never really accurate. they're based on something dark, ... really dark. It's ... if you actually look into stereotypes on certain groups, it always has a dark origin. So many people have...ugh I’m not just going to even...

*Rachel’s video cuts out*

F: Ok next question:

Why do you think people of color are able to be anti-Semitic or kinda just hold anti Semitic beliefs, consciously or subconsciously?

R: I think a lot of it is the perception that being Jewish is inherently tied to having power, and so a lot of communities look at it as punching up, when that’s not the reality of the situation, so I think when... this goes for every other group I think that because that’s the kinda the stereotypical argument for why people don't like Jews is “Oh, well we control the world so other people were super wealthy we’re super rich so people can say, oh I can hate this group because they’re above me, so I’m punching up.”

F: Mhmmm

R: But you know there are Black Jews, there are disabled Jews, there’s...all these intersections. There’s plenty of poor Jews. So there’s this idea that just because you’re Jewish you’re rich and powerful.

F: Hmm. That’s a really good way to look at that, because you know I kinda do see how that falls into the “Eat the rich” or whatever. Um...and I recently learned, is it true, I probably should’ve researched this before, but is the illuminati Semitic? ... the idea of an illuminati?

R: The concept is, largely because of who they claim are in it. They are largely Jewish people. And also, it’s the same thing with the “lizard conspiracy/the lizard people”, which I was explaining this to my Mom...actually let me find the message...I think his name is David Icke? But he’s the creator of the “lizard conspiracy” and he also is a Holocaust denier who simultaneously believes that Jews funded the Holocaust to get ... attention….

F: *scoffs in disgust and utter confusion*

R: ...and to get people to pity them. And so a lot of people with go after Soros or the Rothschilds and say ... “oh they’re a part of the illuminati, they’re lizard people who are controlling the world.” and so, no, the concept of this elite group that runs the world and many of the people you’re putting in it are Jewish people.

F: Hmmm, oh ok.

R: Also throughout history, this goes way before the Holocaust, this has been going on for 2,000 years but ... Jews have been accused of running the-Jews--with the lizards they’ll say “Oh they’ll eat your kids” or they’ll do this thing. So Jews have been accused of this thing called blood libel, which is ... sacrificing Christian children and drinking their blood. Which never happened, there’s no documented cases of this, but we---there were large mass murders of Jewish people in the middle ages and also for stealing communion wafers. They would say that we would steal them and ...….stab them to ... to try and kill Jesus. Which sounds...... I think when we learned that we all laughed uncomfortably...but no you don’t understand, thousands of Jews were murdered for this….this isn’t a funny thing. And so it's this idea of ... this secret...Jewish society that’s gonna kill your kids, steal all the wealth and even--they’ll try to, David Icke, again, I don’t know if I’m pronouncing his name right, I’m sorry. But--

F: Who cares (if you’re pronouncing his name right) honestly?

R: It’s not anti-Semitic because these Jews who I’m accusing aren’t really human...but yes they are.

F: Yeah

R: These are Jewish people.

F:... any group of people are people...so he’s trying to say Jewish people are alien, so it doesn’t count?

R: Pretty much.

F: *wtf confusion laugh*

R: So I think a lot of times the people who spread the conspiracies don’t know….the prices of it. Once you learn, you dig a little deeper, you can see the issue that comes from it.

F: Do you think um that in that sense that memes can be hurtful--or harmful because of ... you know the illuminati meme. So people don’t know that the concept of the illuminati is essentially anti-Semitic, so do you think ... meme culture is contributing to ignorance?

R: I think yeah to some extent, because when it gets widespread enough you know? It becomes normalized and then when someone tries to speak about it and says, “Hey this thing is problematic” they’ll be ... “Oh no it’s just a joke, you’re taking it too seriously, it has nothing to do with that.” Well, if you look back, ... it does and historically these kinds of “jokes” have led to groups being persecuted. It’s just a matter of if someone tells you something is problematic, don’t brush it off.

F: And I would ... to point out that I made a joke about Mark Zuckerberg being a robot lizard in response to um...him uh trying to buy Native lands and I was like “What?”(when someone said it was Semitic) honestly my brain doesn’t even go to---I don’t research who people are. I don’t know why I didn’t know he was Jewish, I didn’t know. And then I went to I forgot what website I went to, I went through all the stereotypes of Jewish people and I didn’t see anything about “lizard”, but it was ...I was trying to find a way to excuse myself...but if someone tells you its wrong, it’s wrong.

R: And I think it’s about being willing to learn and listen ..., I made those jokes. I didn’t realize until earlier this year what the basis of it all was. So I’ve made plenty of jokes about the illuminati and lizard people….and then started reading things by other Jewish people and I was ... “Oh! I never thought about that.” I didn’t connect the dots and put that all together.

F: Yeah and especially with ... jokes ... they’re so modern, memes are so modern, so when we’re told about anti-semitism being framed as a past thing, we do this. So when we use jokes and stuff--I mean non-Jewish people, I think when we use jokes in general, honestly, about any group, we don’t think “Ok what’s the context of this? What’s the history behind this?” Because---BEYONCE friggin’ singing about the illuminati....

R: *laughs*

F: I mean she was kinda ... dragging it, but the jokes get that big. So I feel ...---I don’t know. I want to publicly apologize for calling Mark Zuckerberg a robot lizard because I thought that was a meme and not based in anti-Semitic language.

R: We’ve all done that so many times.

F: I was talking about how he’s ... a robot and acts weird, so it’s completely on me.

What do you want people to know about your culture?

R: Um, that it’s not a monolith. There’s this ongoing joke in the Jewish community that if you have two Jewish people in a room you’ll have three different opinions.

F: *laughs*

R: So we all practice differently, we all have a different relationship with religion and spirituality and that the big thing is that we’re not this all powerful group. I think it confuses people that Judaism isn’t...first off Judeo-Christian is not real we’re not--Judaism and christianity are very different so I get annoyed when they’re lumped together. “Judeo-Christian values” ... no we have completely different values and beliefs.

F: Yeah

R: I think it really confuses people when I tell them that I don’t believe in God but I still consider myself very Jewish, because it’s so intrinsically tied as this just religious concept but because of the persecution that Jewish communities have faced, it’s taken on this double role as an ethnicity and a religion. So ..., I’m a white person, there’s no way that I’m not white but I’m also a Jewish white person so it's kinda a different path, a different history. And I still have this connection with my Judaism, while at the same time, you know, I haven’t been to synagogue since I was 13, so I don’t believe in higher powers and stuff, at least at this point in my life. That could change, but I think it’s such a part of who we are and there’s that generational trauma that Jews are born with--or at least biological because you’re still just as Jewish if you convert to Judaism, I think there’s also this idea, Oh! My cat just came in...

I think there’s also this idea that when you’re controlling the world you're trying to make everyone like you. But Jews don’t proselytize, Jews aren’t trying to make other people Jewish. Which is very different than the way some other religions operate, where it’s going out and trying to get everyone to agree with you so you can save their soul or whatever...

F: Mhm

R: Also when it comes to--this is less for Judaism, this is for every group, ya know I was talking about um The BLM protests and using dark humor. In my experience at least, I think the groups that are affected can use dark humor about it. So ..., Black people can make jokes about police brutality, I can’t make jokes about police brutality because it’s not affecting me personally, so I feel ... Jewish people, we wanna make Jew jokes between ourselves, that’s fine, but when other people make jokes ... ok now it’s uncomfortable because of that power imbalance, ‘cause you haven’t faced a holocaust or gone through these things I’ve gone through as a Jewish person, and I haven’t gone through these other things. So I think when people make a joke “Oh I have a dark sense of humor, I like to use dark humor to cope” well it’s not ... your trauma to cope with. I think that’s with every group that’s gone through something...there’s certain dark humor that you can’t use.

F: Yeah that’s such a good way to put it because ... you may be coping with other things but it’s not the thing you’re talking about, so why do you need to cope with the jokes about that? I’ve heard, anti-Semitic jokes and I’m ... “What the-” *leans back* from ... non- Jewish people and….who is that for? How is that make you feel better as a human? I was like: “Why are you doing this? Shut up.”

R: Yeah.

F: They know it’s wrong...it’s like the “edgy” 4chan type of thing ... *~I’m so edgy~* No your’e not. Personally, I think you’re weak if you can’t come up with a joke that doesn’t hurt a group of people

R: Oh yeah. Oh and then another thing I’d ... people to realize about Judaism is for one….the issue of Judaism and anti-Semitism is separate from the issue of Israel/Palestine and anti-Zionism and also not every Jew has the same opinion on it and we’re not all experts on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, so you don’t need to derail every discussion with “Oh what are your thoughts on Palestine? Do you support Palestine? Do you support Israel?” Because it’s so separate, and such a complex issue. You know because I was born Jewish doesn’t mean that I automatically have this innate knowledge of the entire conflict. It can kinda be used as a way to derail people when talking about anti-Semitism we face, ya know you’ll--I’ve seen this a lot on TikTok where people will make videos talking about things they face and a lot of the comments are “Free Palestine”...well they didn’t mention Palestine, we don’t know their views on Palestine. Just ‘cause you’re Jewish that doesn’t make you a Zionist, just---I’m sure people who have Palestinian heritage doesn’t make you anti-Zionist, ya know? They're separate issues and people ... to lump them into one…..and if someone says that anti-Zionism is treading into Semitism, then we should listen to them because they’re two separate things and you can protest in Israel and not be falling into anti-Semitic tropes.

F: Right, that’s such a complex subject. I would never ask someone straight up: “Who’s side are you on?!” because it’s so, so complex. I remember I tried to dedicate a whole day to just researching, “Ok what’s going on?” and it’s just ... so much information it’s just hard because I don’t even want to speak on it because it has nothing to do with me, so I was just trying to get--I remember when it was on the news a lot, right? I’m like trying to understand what you guys are saying, so I like to do background researching and oh my gosh, I can’t imagine summing up your opinion in one sentence about that or why you chose this side and not that. It’s so varied.

R: Ya know I’m still learning about it, I don’t know that much about it so ya know when I try to talk about this Jewish thing they’ll be ... “Oh! What are your thoughts on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict?” I’m just ... *raises hands up* “I don’t know, I need time to learn more”

F: Yeah it’s like *looks at phone* “hold on a sec (while I research more on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and get back to ya)”

How do you see yourself in your country?

R: Um...it’s complicated because I’m from a privileged family in a privileged area so I know I have intrinsic power in this country, Judaism is easier to hide than other things. You can’t look at me and know I’m Jewish whereas you could look at a Black person and know they’re Black, you could look at a Muslim wearing a headscarf and know they’re Muslim. So it’s much easier to get away with things, I’m not going to be profiled until I open my mouth and say something about my Judaism, but at the same time, there is that fear because we’ve seen it before, Jews in Germany weren’t identifiable by looking at them but it’s on their birth certificate and they started rounding up. So I do get that little pang of panic every time I see “Jewish cemetery desecrated” or “Swastikas drawn on synagogue”...last time I went to synagogue was after the Tree of Life shooting, I went in solidarity and there was ... armed guards outside and it was so scary thinking about “Oh my God there could be a bomb threat, there could be a shooter.” and there’s this idea where I know I have privilege and I know I’m in a position of power but at the same time, ... I know that I have to be ready to flee if something happens, because every few generations of Jews have had to do that, for thousands of years now. So it’s all complex intertwined identity, where-so I call myself “Conditionally white”, I benefit so much from white privilege and everything except my Judaism is white, white, white but then there’s at the same time, I wasn’t considered white under the defining whatever, where you write down your race, in the eyes of the US until ... the 50s. They had white and Jewish as two separate ethnicities or races. It’s such a weird place to be.

F: Yeah and of course, I know you say you are/look white so you have all this privilege and stuff but at the same time, being scared of sharing a part of you that’s...an average white person doesn’t have to be scared of ... saying “Oh I believe this” and then if you feel the fear of sharing that, just in general or fear of a hate crime, that is very valid. And I think sometimes we forget that.

R: It’s interesting sometimes hearing people talk about Judaism. They think of it as this “Oh taking over the world, there’s gotta be a lot of them” it’s ... well, there’s 14 million of us in the world right now, about a third are in Israel, the US has 1.5 million. Compared to that, probably half the world's population is Christian. There's 1 or 2 billion Muslims, we’re a very small group comparatively.

F: I do think the illuminati thing perpetuates that so much, subconsciously or unconsciously….although it’s supposed to be a “smaller group” or whatever but still they make it ... this huge thing kinda framed like Scientology. It’s so weird that people don’t--I’ve heard many Christians claim that “I’m scared to say I’m Christian” and it's just ... that’s so valid for you and I’m not disregarding your experience...the historical context behind it, even people who are Muslim and all these hate crimes...I don’t think I’ve ever seen a hate crime against a Catholic church...

R: Not in a very long time and when it has been, it’s usually between Christian sects.

F: Yeah, that too, infighting. I dunno where I was going with that. *laughs* but I know what you mean by blowing up this population to be a “threat”. I think that happens with any group that someone disagrees with like the “liberals” “antifa” they blow it up to huge populations, ... “Oh my gosh we’re being invaded!” I’m surprised that more people haven’t seen with, you know the steps to genocide, that’s one of the things (steps), it’s making this group of people a “threat” that’s “invading” a space...I’m surprised that people don’t see that about any group but especially about the Jewish community, AGAIN! That’s not the first time! It’s just constant, there’s no breaks!

R: Yeah that’s most of Jewish history since other major religions came in….you know we haven’t been in power since Christianity came in.

What’s the biggest misconception bout your community?

R: Um, I’d say probably getting back to that rich/powerful thing. Just the, ya know that and the Israeli-Palestinian conflict thing. Those are the two things I hear the most and also Holocaust deniers..which I don’t know why there are so many but there are like or the people who say “Oh yeah it happened but it’s not as bad as they make it seem.”.

F: Sooo stupid. I just can’t imagine denying any sort of crime against humanity, .. I can’t even talk about it, it makes me so pissed.

Do you feel like there is adequate representation of your community in the media?

R: Um I think we definitely have more representation than other groups...but I find it to be kind of more one track or stereotypical so it doesn’t show ... the breadth of the Jewish community. The only show about Jews is Unorthodox and that kinda portrays Orthodox Judaism in a not great light. But I think there’s a lot more Jewish….you know they used to say “Jews control Hollywood” because a lot of actors and directors were Jewish and it’s ... “Well, maybe we’re just creative?”

F: *laughing*

R: So theres a lot of famous Jews and I guess a lot of Hollywood producers are Jewish but I think when it comes to actual characters, we don’t see practicing Jews that aren’t relying on stereotypes. But I don’t think the media is particularly targeted harmful to Jews the way it’s targeted other communities.

F: What do you think about the movies about the Holocaust that come out every year? And I’m not saying anything against them, I’m just curious what your take on that is because it’s interesting that I see a lot of these movies come out right? But in school it’s a day lesson, but the media keeps on talking about it. Do you appreciate that? Do you wish the content was better?

*both laugh*

R: I think some are better done than others. I prefer, my area of study is the Holocaust, so I have to submerse myself in all that stuff because that’s what my thesis is going to be on, it’s frustrating sometimes to see the fictionalized stories pushed over the real ones, especially the ones that have Christian charac---Boy in the Striped Pajamas made sob when I first watched it. Then I watched it again and I realized you’re only side because the little Christian kid dies.

F: *gasps in awe/mind blown* Ugh you gotta put that somewhere and share it because that’s such a good point!

R: And then there's, there was drama about some of the Holocaust books and they were ... hey “this isn’t a real story this didn’t happen but your pushing it as a real story”. So I….there’s so many real life tragedies that sometimes it seems a little weird that you create your fake characters about it. But at the same time, I do enjoy Holocaust movies ... I do consume content but there does seem ... a weird disproportionate obsession with it. I’ve said this to my family, I don’t really trust non-Jews who are super into WW2. ... there’s something about it, why are you so into it? “... I think it’s cool how that could happen, it’s cool to think about how….” I don’t really trust your motives, there’s something off to me. I think when it’s their personality is ... WW2! Holocaust!...Why are you so invested in this?

F: Oh my gosh yeah. Do you think there could be more movies about real people in real stories? ... I’ll look at “Is this movie true” (On google) ... The Boy in the Striped Pajamas So (I looked up) “Is this true” and it said, “Ummm no.” and it’s like... OK but wouldn’t it be more impactful to have real stories that are told?

R: I think so to some extent but I also don’t think they should do it without permission and sometimes there isn’t someone’s permission to ask.

F: Right.

R: But you don’t want those stories to die, you know if there’s a family left and this story is important and you don’t want it to get lost in the books but you know, so much has already been taken from the Jewish community...you have to weigh whether or not it’s worth it to contribute to that to get a story out there.

Do you think some directors and writers choose to make a story about the Holocaust as Oscar bait?

R: Probably. I think tragedies tend to do well in the awards circuit and I think tragedies about white people especially tend to do well. So I think if you...have this event, something that everyone knows about, everyone knows about the Holocaust, and they go “Ok well they’re not going to turn down this story about this kid in the Holocaust”. I don’t know every director's intention, there could be some who want to get the story out there. But I do think it’s easier to get something about a major historical event.

Do you feel that Jewish people are put in a box, only being seen as victims?

R: I’d say it’s usually the opposite. I’d feel ... both sides of the political spectrum put Jewish people in this box of “oppressor”.

F: Mhmmm

R: You see it because it’s one of those groups that gets hit on both sides. Where ... a lot of people say “Oh yeah well in the Holocaust you were all the victims.” which doesn’t annoy me because you’ll see these people say “They just willingly got on the carts to drive to camps and no one fought back.” well, no there were militias there were uprisings. They weren't just happily getting on these buses and not fighting for their lives. So I do think there’s a lot of victimization when it comes to the Holocaust, but a lot of people say “That was in the past, now no one’s attacking the Jews, no one’s doing anything so they’re taking advantage of us”. So I think in a historical context Jews are placed in a box of victimhood but in a modern context, it’s flipped.

F: Hm. How do you see left v. right, can you explain how you’ve seen each group take hits at the Jewish community?

R: Yeah

F: Kinda ... just a few points for people to watch and look out for?

R: The right is pretty much what you’d expect, neo-Nazis, swastikas, SS tattoos which is not fun, I don’t like seeing those. You see these white supremacists and I think on the left, they think all the Jews in that group are included in the white supremacy, when we’re explicitly excluded, we are not considered white by white supremacist standards. But you see the left use Steven Miller and Jared Kushner who, you know, they’re Jewish, they’re also terrible people but they happen to be Jewish...and them being terrible doesn't make them not Jewish but you see people like that...from the left we see a lot more of the anti-semitism coming out kinda disguised by anti-Zionism.

F: Mhmm

R: Again, I think there are perfectly valid reasons to be anti-Zionist. Another issue I have that the left like to do, which sometimes is valid and sometimes isn’t, is comparing things to the Holocaust.

F: Mhmm

R: Sometimes I think that’s…..can compare something, especially if Jewish people are saying that “Hey, these are things that we were seeing happening in Nazi Germany that we’re seeing now.” I remember getting really upset when I was seeing vegans compare animal farming to the Holocaust and ... yeah I have a lot of issues with the meat industry but don’t conflate those two things ‘cause its basically saying Jewish people are cattle. That’s how it comes out to the Jewish people.

F: Yeah I just looked up, I just wanted to make sure, yeah I have definitely heard that in the vegan community and it does bother me, um...I um feel like genocide is a better way to put it because it’s a mass killing of a population, the Holocaust-

R: Yeah the Holocaust is tied to a specific event.

F: Yeah, so I have also seen a video of a Holocaust survivor who went vegan, who compared it to the Holocaust, but I think that is his right.

R: Yeah when you are affected. If someone is from a group and critiquing a way a group is handling something, ok I’ll listen to your side of this but when it’s an outsider, I’m not sure you have a say in that.

F: No, and even the way the Holocaust happened, the steps to the Holocaust didn’t happen to animals, the animals weren’t stereotyped, they weren’t vilified. I don’t think it’s accurate.

R: At the same time I don’t think it’s just comparing everything to the Holocaust, just listen to Jewish people when we start saying, “Hey, this is looking eerily similar.”. I remember in 2015/16 I remember saying, “Hey when you look at his platform,” I’m sure we all know who he is--

*laughs*

R: “he has pretty much the textbook definition of fascism.” “Oh no, he doesn’t have this one step, it’s fine.” And then he’ll pass that step and it’s like, “Hey guys, I told you we’ve seen this before….these are the 14 steps and we’re at like 12 now.”

F: Yeah and you’ve studied it so you’d think that people would listen to you.

R: Yeah I started learning about the Holocaust, probably ... first grade in Hebrew school. Ya know ... I’ve seen all these pict---also if people could not just share these Holocaust pictures, constantly without any warning, ... those are photos that are traumatic to a lot of us. Now, I’m used to seeing them again because it’s what I study but you see people, they’ll share things, when they’re comparing to the Holocaust, they’ll put like a Holocaust photo...you know those are people ... that I know. Those are my Grandparent’s friends, those are the parents of one of my teachers. I feel like people forget, they lump it into the numbers “Oh yeah 6 million Jews died”, but yeah each of those 6 million was a person. So when you post a photos, piles of dead bodies, those are people.

F: I don’t agree with that either, even our presentations we would do about the Holocaust, it didn’t feel right seeing these people put behind a title.

R: I feel like people get swept up by the numbers that they forget it’s people. It’s real people who went through this. And it’s sad because we’re getting to that time because the last of the Holocaust survivors are reaching the end of their lifespan, so it’s gonna be harder and harder to have people come in and tell you firsthand, which helps to humanize it.

F: Yeah and especially the deniers, what going to happen when these people--and thank goodness they survived, hopefully they have a peaceful passing, but once they’re gone they’re going to be like “Oh no one has been there….”

R: So another thing, I went to a racist white high school. We had a lot of issues, we had 3 Black people at my school and we had issues with graffiti slurs against the Black people, so they brought in a Holocaust survivor to talk about tolerance, but it was very propaganda. So this Holocaust survivor came in and talked about how they befriended one of the nazi guards and I was like “This is not the story that we need to be sharing…

F: Wh-what?

R:... this nazi guard and this Jewish person became friend like that’s not how it is for the 99.9% of them. Don’t use it as your propaganda for tolerance saying “Yeah the victims and the ones who are hurting them should just like this person should just forget about what happened to them and just be friends with them.” So I think it’s just used as propaganda a lot instead of letting it stand as the story it is.

F: Or even “taking the high road”. Just like pretending you love everybody, “I love the people who did this to my family, my community”

R: It makes the people who don’t (take the high road) seem like they’re being irrational...hey I don’t like Nazis, I support punching Nazis then like “Hey you need to preach tolerance.” no they murdered people I know.

F: Yeah I’ve even, I’ve only seen one Nazi-Nazi in Nevada in person, it’s just ......he was wearing a Deutschland shirt, it’s just so crazy how--I made a post about this, and he just looked so weak, that always stuck with me. He looked so weak and insecure, and I’m like you should feel that way because there are so many groups of people who are stronger with their bonds with each other, like the Jewish community or any community, that you should feel weak because you just want to be an angsty little white boy. Side note: he looked me in the eyes and I looked at him back and he left. So….

*laughs*

F: That was only a fraction of what you feel. I feel ... we’re so desensitized to swastikas, I mean I haven’t seen one as graffiti, but the image, I feel we are too desensitized to that.

R: Oh yeah I get frustrated with people who say “We need to reclaim the swastika”.

F: *Laughs* “Noo”

R: I get you wanna reclaim if but it’s too far gone. It’s traumatizing for the Jewish community, I get it used to be the symbol of peace…

F: Right

R: But it’s just not what that is anymore.

F: I mean that’s why it was taken, I’m sure you’ve studied this, but that’s why Hitler got people to jump on board because it’s this pretty picture of this “peaceful future”. So taking it back would almost be like...that’s where it started and look at where we are...

R: I personally haven’t come across Jews who want to reclaim it, it’s non-Jews. And there might be Jews who want to, I don’t know every Jew on Earth but the ones I’ve interacted with are all uncomfortable seeing swastikas. And you know when I see those photos of swastikas on this Jewish cemetery destroying the grave, it’s ... I can’t help picture that with my Grandparent’s graves, ... oh what if this was where my family was buried.

F: Yeah in my hometown there was a lot of that going around, just everywhere, it’s just disgusting. The fact that non-Jewish people suggested reclaiming that? That’s just disgusting and inappropriate. You don’t have a right to-- for anyone watching, you don’t have a right to go up to a Jewish person and say “No but I wanna do this” no, that’s not right, if it doesn’t apply to you, don’t speak on it. Or try to reclaim anything. I’m done with reclaiming things. When you said “non-Jewish people” I thought that you were talking about your Jewish friends who thought “You know maybe we could take it back…”

R: No.

F: Deadass

R: No all the Jewish people I know don’t like seeing swastikas and have no interest in seeing them in our lives.

F: Like understandably, it’s not even crazy! I wouldn’t. Ugh.

What would you like to see more of from allies?

R: Um, I think more listening, I like this kind of stuff, just having a conversation. Just not speaking for us and just amplifying our voices. And again, not conflating Judaism and Christianity. Not being like “Oh our Judeo-Christian values” Jews aren’t good because they’re related to this Christian thing, no it’s our own thing, it’s very different religion. And even if what the Jewish person is saying something you don’t agree with, just listen at least and say your side, you know we’re not a monolith. We aren’t one person with one mind. We aren’t going to agree on everything, and you know if someone said that something you said was anti-Semitic, don’t get defensive, let them explain why and try and be better. Because we’re not going around saying every single thing is anti-Semitic.

F: Of course, you have a reason

R: Call out celebrities when they promote dangerous things.

F: Yeah like dangerous ideas. I would like to personally work on what things are inherently anti-Semitic and have been popularized so I know and can share that info.

R: And also for the stuff I’ve seen recently, when people seem to be calling out anti-Semitism they call it out a lot more strongly with Black people and that’s a problem. Black people can be anti-Semitic, we saw that with Nick Canon, we saw that with Luis Farakesh, (Edit: She meant Louis Farrakhan)

F: Ice cube

R: We’ve seen Black celebrities say anti-Semitic things and also white celebrities so don’t just call it out when it’s just Black people. I’ve been following some Black dudes on twitter who are saying “Hey this makes me really uncomfortable. Why are you going so hard against this person and not against this person?”

F: Yeah I guess I never thought about that with the Nick Canon thing. That was a mess.

R: Yeah and what he said was completely wrong.

F: I heard so many different versions of what he said, ... “Black people are beautiful” but wait no that’s not what he said

*laughs*

F: I do think um my question about POC people being anti-Semitic was based on Ice Cube, honestly. That shocked me, I was shocked, my jaw fell when he posted an anti-semitic image, not a swastika. How can you want support and then do this? So...

R: I think it’s the idea that they’re punching up.

F: Yeah, I’m glad you mentioned looking for how people react to a POC being anti-Semitic V. a white person because I can’t even recall the last time I heard a white person like be called out, or dragged/cancelled as much as Nick Canon.

R: Yeah you’ll see it with the right-wing politicians, they’ll get called out, but you don’t see it from the moderates or left wing celebrities, even though they’re also out there saying things.

F: Like anyone can be anti-Semitic anyone can be racist and I think that’s why I want to share your perspective to help a little bit, because even your friends and family can be saying stuff like this, it’s important to not let it slip through (and think) “Oh they didn’t mean that”...address it. I hope this helps in some way. Thanks for letting me interview you

R: Thanks for wanting to interview me.

F: No problem. I’m gonna stop this and then we can talk a lil’ privately. Byeeee

R: Bye.

Let’s have a discussion! Did you learn anything new from this conversation?

Let me know here.

To close out each post, I’d like to write a lil’ paragraph about the person I talk with:

Rachel is kind and expresses her thoughts skillfully. Her resilience is deeply apparent because she’s able to study the horrific history of her people and still stay sane. That is a feat I could never, ever, live up to. Reliving pain takes such a huge amount of strength and power. Rachel’s kind words (and others’ from in the egg gang ;) ) really helped me when I was in a dark spot. I’m blessed that you took the time to talk with my wacky self. I hope we continue to be friends and I also hope you know that I’m always here for you, Rachel, as you were there for me.

You are a treasure.

-Faithxx

#intersectionality #jewish community #discussionswithfaith #twilight

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angryschnauzer · 4 years

Text

In Another World

Summary: In another world, it was Jensen that got the role of Captain America, not Chris. You have dreamed of meeting Jensen ever since you saw him in his CGI glory in The First Avenger, and your comicon experience you discover to be underwhelming. But then you meet a cosplayer in the bar... and life takes an altogether different turn for you.

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, Comicon, Comic Convention, Strangers at a Bar, Cosplay, Captain America Cosplay, Unprotected Sex, Hotel Room Sex, Oral Sex, Fingering, Blow Job, Anal Play.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Female Reader (no race specified)

The above Jensen manip i cannot trace, it was sent to me years ago by a now deactivated tumblr user, with the signature half chopped off. Its the artwork that inspired this fic. In case you weren’t aware, Jensen auditioned for the role of Captain America but it of course went to Chris.

I do not operate a tag list, but feel free to go ahead and follow @angryschnauzerwrites and put that blog onto notifications, as you will then be notified when i post a new story. Oneshots will be posted on Tumblr and AO3, Multichapter stories will be AO3 exclusives.

Due to the amount of stories i have written over the years i no longer have a masterlist, instead please check out my AO3 HERE.

In Another World

You sat at your computer, staring at the screen as you streamed the latest press junket. Marvel was going all out with its ten-year plan for The Avengers and with this press tour for The Winter Soldier you had fallen in love even more with Cap.

As the images streamed live from the far east, you watched as Jensen flexed his muscles and his co-stars laughed in admiration. He was born to be Captain America.

But you weren’t the only one watching.

In a small apartment in Boston another pair of eyes watched with an added level of sadness. He remembered the audition. Standing in the hallway with a bunch of other guys, all in their 20’s, all having a few bit-part roles under their belts in teen TV shows or low budget horror movies. The same green eyes that stared out of the screen had looked at him in the hallway, holding his hand out to shake;

“Hey man. Jensen”

“Chris”

Jensen smiled;

“Strong Boston accent there dude”

Chris chuckled;

“Say the same about you, what’s that Houston?”

“Dallas”

“Eh, close enough”

They chatted for a while as the guys ahead of them in the line entered the room, only to leave 5 minutes later. They didn’t look up at the guys left, no-one wanted to read expressions to give themselves fake hope. The door opened and the annoying droll voice of the elderly secretary called out;

“Ackles”

Chris looked up, holding his hand out to his new acquaintance;

“Break a leg man”

Shaking it briefly Jensen nodded;

“Thanks man”

You clung to your priority tickets, the excitement so intense you weren’t sure if you were going to puke or cry. You hoped for neither. It was your first convention and you had maxed out your credit card and called in sick from work when the special edition tickets had been released, refreshing your computer every ten seconds so that when they had been released online you had made your purchase within 30 seconds.

Now standing towards the front of the queue you were terrified. You had loved Jensen from the first moment you’d seen him in all his CGI glory in The First Avenger. You’d followed his career and had even gone back and watched his entire back catalogue. He was a natural for the role and the stealth suit from the most recent movie had made him look so handsome you had actually swooned when you had seen those first opening scenes of the movie aboard the Lumerian Star.

The con volunteers were doing an amazing job, herding the fans into some form of order, and as you got closer you could hear the laughter and squeals of joy as fans ahead of you were rapidly shown in.

It was your turn. The flimsy black curtain was pulled aside, and you were pushed into the brightness of the well-lit area that was surrounded on all sides by vivid blue panels that bore the con’s logo. Jensen turned and smiled, putting his hand out and you found you were standing next to him. Your head swam;

“Do you have a pose?”

“Umm…” You could see the con workers and volunteers moving their arms in a ‘hurry up’ motion; “I guess… a hug?”

“Sure thing”

He wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pointed towards the bored looking photographer;

“Smile sweetie”

You did. You smiled, your saw blobs as the flash blinded you. You didn’t even register as Jensen pressed his hand to your back, thanking you before turning to the next person who had already been pulled through the black curtain. A volunteer took your wrist and pulled you gently through the curtain on the far side, giving you your photo number as they apologised it was so fast.

The curtain closed and you stood there, blinking as you tried to focus on the small piece of paper you held. It was done. Over. You’d met Jensen and it had been so rushed you hadn’t even had chance to look at him.

The bile started to rise, you looked around and saw a trash can, leaning over it and vomited into the piles of used coffee cups and candy wrappers.

The hunt for a bottle of water at a con hadn’t been something you would think would take so long; a lot of the vendors had already sold out, others the line was so long it would have taken you longer to get the water than the queue for the con in the first place. It seemed as if everyone was walking against you, or you were going against the flow of them, but when you finally got your water you drained the entire bottle, soothing your bile parched throat. Wiping your mouth with the back of your hand you heard an announcement over the PA system;

“We apologise, but the Jensen Ackles panel won’t be broadcast out of the auditorium due to technical issues”

“WHAT?” you grabbed your wrist, looking at your watch as your eyes went wide. You’d been so dazed by your photo op and feeling ill afterwards you had forgotten about the panel. You needed a drink, and something stronger than water.

Chris adjusted the helmet of his costume as he looked in the mirror. The men’s room was quiet, the main panel of the con was on and he couldn’t bring himself to sit in the same room as the guy that had won the role that had made him millions; of fans and dollars.

After not getting the Captain America role Chris had continued to take bit parts and small independent movies. He was recognised occasionally but he hadn’t hit the big time. In fact there were months when there was nothing coming in and it was only after someone had asked him to fill in at a kids party where one of the superhero guys had fallen sick at the last minute did the idea of cosplaying come to him. Now however he was well known in cosplay circles, even getting paid for some appearances. He was called a natural for the role, but that was the hardest to hear. He’d worked hard with his costumer and within just a few weeks of the latest movie coming out they’d successfully recreated the amazing Stealth Suit in its darker colours.

Checking his pants for his wallet he decided he needed a drink, and something stronger than a soda.

Nodding to the bartender, you thanked him as he set the beer down in front of you before he went to the far end of the bar to pull the latest load of glasses out of the dishwasher. You sat picking at the label and tracing patterns in the condensation that gathered on the cool glass. You were vaguely aware of other people coming and going, and when the barstool next to you was taken you didn’t look up.

“What’ll it be Cap?”

The bartender’s greeting drew your attention from your drink, casting your gaze to your side and your breath was sucked from your body. You watched as the man set his helmet onto the surface of the bar before nodding to what you were drinking;

“Same as the lady please”

Your eyes travelled from where his hand sat on the countertop of the bar up the dark sleeve of his stealth suit, taking in his wide shoulders and up to the fluffy dark blonde hair, slightly messed up from where he’d been wearing the helmet. You couldn’t help it, but you were staring. Your jaw was hanging low as he turned slowly to you, his blue eyes sparkling with just the faintest hint of green as he looked at you and a self-conscious smile tugged at the corner of his mouth;

“Hi…”

“You’re… you’re…”

“No, just cosplaying…” he turned back to his beer for a moment until you finally found your voice

“No. You’re Chris”

He set his beer on the countertop and turned to you, this time a genuine smile on his face;

“Do we know each other?”

“Well…” you blushed; “We spoke on Instagram” He cocked an eyebrow, but his attention didn’t waiver from you as you continued; “You’re ‘AlmostCap’, right? You posted about wanting advice on how to dye leather boots a deeper colour? I messaged you with the details of the dyes costumiers use”

His face broke into a wide smile;

“Oh yeah, that really worked! How did you know that?”

“Majored in theatre design at college”

“Well that titbit of knowledge brought the whole costume together” he motioned to his stealth suit and you couldn’t help but to look him up and down; “Without you I wouldn’t look this good”

You snorted back a laugh;

“I’m sure you look just a good without the suit”

Bringing your beer to your lips you took a sip, not realising Chris had moved closer until his lips brushed against your ear;

“Would you like to find out?”

The hotel room door crashed against the wall, the metal doorknob leaving a dent in the drywall. Chris had you pressed up against it, one hand holding you flush with his chest as his other hand blindly reached out for the door to close it. As soon as his fingertips grasped the cool wood he threw it shut with a thud that reverberated through the room.

Your hands clawed at Chris’s costume, desperate to find purchase, something, anything to hang onto and anchor yourself as he kissed you so hard you saw spangled stars. He’d put his costume helmet back on for the rather quick walk through the convention to the hotel where you were staying. His lips traced patterns over your cheek before he pressed kisses down your neck, whispering as he went;

“I don’t normally do this…”

“Me neither…

“...especially in costume…”

“Oh Chris…Cap…”

“It’s Captain tonight, Princess”

His fingers had found their way to the buttons on the front of your dress, skilfully plucking each one from its grasp on the thin cotton fabric, before his still gloved hand roughly cupped your breasts. As his lips found yours again, he groaned into your mouth as he weighed your breasts in his large hands, the rough leather against the lace of your bra sending chills through you. If Chris had a Captain kink you weren’t about to say no, hell, it would be one of your biggest fantasies.

You found yourself being manhandled towards the bed, Chris’s kisses hard and ravenous, and when he wasn’t kissing you his tongue was doing the most devilish things on your skin. The bed touched the back of your knees and you were falling back onto the covers, Chris following seconds later as he pressed you into the mattress. With a thick thigh he pushed your legs apart, the rough Kevlar fabric of his suit brushing against the delicate skin of your soft skin as his fingers sought out the juncture of thighs. The brush of the harsh leather of his fingerless gloves made you groan into his mouth as he tugged your panties to the side and his thumb found your clit. Rubbing small circles, he teased it from its hood, before his fingers slid through your folds to ease some of your slick moisture from you to smooth his efforts.

When his lips left yours you chased after them, but his voice made you settle back against the bed and open your eyes;

“Uh-uh… stay there Princess”

You watched as he brought his fingers to his mouth, before his kiss bruised lips closed around his glistening digits and he moaned as he tasted you;

“You taste amazing”

“Umm… thank you?”

“Here…”

He brought his hand to your mouth and you grasped it as you sucked gently on just the fingertips, watching as Chris’s already lust blown pupils widened even further;

“Jesus fucking Christ, your tongue…”

Letting go of his fingers with an audible pop, you pushed yourself up onto your elbows, resting on one arm as you slid a hand between your bodies and palmed his erection through his suit;

“What about my tongue?” you grinned before you tugged him down to lay beside you.

Pushing up onto your knees you ran your hand down his chest and stomach, the costume warm from his body heat and firm to the touch. Your fingers clawed at his suit to try and find the zipper, and after thirty seconds of searching you let out a huff;

“Ok, how the fuck to I get in here?”

With a low chuckle Chris reached down and lifted a hidden Velcro flap that revealed the button and the top of the zipper, and you eagerly tugged the pants of his suit open. The large bulge in his boxers immediately filled the space of the open zipper, and you found yourself nuzzling against the hardness that the soft jersey fabric could hardly contain. Pressing open mouthed kisses to the hard shaft through the fabric, you felt Chris’s hands on your head, he wasn’t pushing but you could tell he wanted you. With a smile you just about tugged his boxers down enough to free his cock, the thick shaft standing proud from the fly of his stealth suit. You wrapped your hands around it, the flesh hot to touch and pumped him slowly.

“Ah fuck Princess…”

“Yes Captain?”

“Please…”

He sounded wrecked, and as you leant forwards and licked at the bead of clear precum that was pooling at the tip you not only heard but felt the low rumble of his moan of appreciation. Wrapping your lips around the tip you started to suck, your tongue working over the hot smooth flesh as your fist worked up and down, pumping him slowly as you let the saliva pool in your mouth so you could take him deeper. In a moment when you pulled off to take a breath Chris’s hands were suddenly on your hips, moving you until you were kneeling on the bed and straddling his shoulders, and for a moment you squealed where his sudden strength had moved you with such ease.

“Gotta taste you…” he muttered from beneath the skirt of your dress, his hands smoothing over the globes of your ass and you could feel his breath hot on your skin. His fingers tugged your panties to the side and he was pulling you down onto his mouth, his tongue swiping through your soaked folds.

For a moment you lost yourself, Chris’s efforts driving you closer to orgasm than you thought was possible, but you found your senses and leant forwards again, taking him as deep as you could and you felt his moan deep in your cunt as he almost came on the spot. Working your fingers into his suit you cupped his balls, feeling them tight and hot in your hand as you sucked hard on his cock. At the same time you felt Chris drive his tongue into your soaked hole and his thumb sought out your clit. Your orgasm was rapidly approaching, and you could feel your legs start to shake. The harder he drove forwards the deeper you took him into your mouth. You heard a muffled cry from between your thighs and you felt that first tremble of the thick vein that ran the length of his cock. At the same time you felt his fingers dance over the crack of your ass, one finger pressing lightly against your dark rose and you were cumming over his face as he pumped thick ropes of cum down your throat.

When your legs were about to give out you tactfully rolled to the side, laying on the bed next to Chris as he fought to catch his breath. With laboured efforts he wrenched his helmet off, and you propped yourself up on your elbows to watch as he started to fumble with his costume;

“Gotta get out of this…”

Watching a hot guy strip was not something you’d experienced before, and a hot guy dressed as Captain America? Well that was hitting all your buttons in one go. You smiled as Chris was muttering to himself;

“Fuckin’ suit, so fuckin’ hot… fuckin’ drenched in sweat…”

When he was down to just his pants you finally spoke up;

“Need a hand there Captain?”

Chris looked up and grinned;

“You mind if I use your shower?”

“Sure thing, it’s all yours…”

Chris started for the small bathroom door, his utility pants hanging low on his hips before he paused and turned, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth;

“Wanna join me?”

Showering with a guy you had literally just met was a surreal experience. The comfort and security of being partially clothed during a hook-up was completely stripped from you as you stood in the small shower enclosure the hotel room offered. Chris had looked absolutely sinful as he had stood beneath the cascading water; his skin patterned with multiple tattoos and just the right amount of chest hair that made you want to run your fingers through it as the hot water coursed over his body. Your fingers had trailed down over his hard stomach, tracing the trail of hair that led to his thick cock hanging heavy between his muscled thighs.

His lips had met yours eagerly again, and he soon had you pressed against the wall, his leg wedged between your thighs as you ground yourself against the firm muscle. Chris’s hands found your ass and eagerly pulled you hard against him, trapping his now angry cock between your bodies;

“Fuck… you’re so fuckin’ sexy” he muttered against your ear, his fingers digging into your asscheeks; “You gonna cum for me Princess? Soak my thigh?”

“Yes Chris, please…”

“What do you need Princess?”

“Something…. Just more…”

He pulled back from you, searching your expression for something, anything as he chose his words;

“I can give you more…” The depth of tone sent a shudder down your spine; “I’m gonna ask you this and you can say no, and I won’t walk out that door if you say no, but do you like ass play?”

You growled. You god-damn growled like a feral wildcat, nodding eagerly;

“Yes Chris… fuck, yes…”

He captured your lips for another fierce kiss as his hands slid over your ass and one finger trailed up the seam of your cheeks before pressing gently against your rear;

“Now Princess” he muttered against your lips; “I haven’t got any lube in here so it’ll just be a gentle press, you tell me if you want me to stop”

You nodded, biting your lip as he pushed forwards, one hand gripping your hip as he slid you up and down his soaked thigh, the other pressing gently but insistently against your back door.

Just that stimulation alone was enough, and you were cumming hard, your head pressed against the cool tiles as Chris sucked a hickey into your neck.

You stood there panting as you tried to regain your composure, Chris holding you tight in his arms as he gently caressed you as you finally came to your senses. Nuzzling against his neck you felt him push his hips forward, his thick cock hard again against your hip;

“Ready for another round?”

“Anything for you Cap” you grinned.

The pair of you had fallen back onto the bed, half dry and oblivious to anything other than pleasure. Body heat rising, you felt your back naturally arch as Chris lay on top of you, pulling his knee up to part your legs further and you could feel his thick length laying hot and hard against your soaked folds. As his other leg pushed up and parted your thighs even further, you felt that first nudge of his tip at your soaked entrance, your legs instinctively wrapping themselves around his waist and with one firm squeeze you felt his breach your body and slide into you.

The base noise that escaped your throat as you felt each glorious inch stretch your velvet walls was music to Chris’s ears, and he let you take the lead even though he was the one on top, letting your body grow accustomed to his size. His lips brushed against your ear as he spoke softly;

“You’re doing so good Princess, feel so fuckin’ amazing, takin’ me so deep”

You slowly relaxed your thighs grip on his waist and Chris started to move, sliding his hips back as he slid out, before pushing slowly back in. Propping himself up either side of you, you watched as his arms bulged as he looked down and watched as he pulled out again, your wetness liberally coating him.

With his tip just notched inside you whined at the loss, before with a powerful thrust he filled you completely;

“Holy FUCK!”

“Do you like that Princess? Like my thick dick splitting you open?”

“Fuck Chris, yes, do it again… please!” you whined.

The gorgeous man above you grinned down, seemingly turned on by your begging, and with a loud grunt he started to pile drive into you, his impressive girth stretching you in all the right ways, the slight upward curve to his shaft making your g-spot his number one target with every push. The man was a demon in bed, fucking you hard as he pressed kisses to your chest and breasts, all whilst uttering the dirtiest things about how good you felt, how well you were taking his dick. You begged for more and he eagerly gave it, fucking you through one orgasm before chasing another. His thrusts started to get sloppy, his hips stuttering and he cursed quietly under his breath;

“Fuck… I’m gonna cum soon…”

“Cum inside me… I’m on the pill…”

He pushed a hand between your bodies, rubbing hard circles against your clit and soon you were coming, your orgasm triggering his, and you as your body milked the cum from his body you both felt like you had found heaven.

With a grunt Chris rolled to your side, his dick sliding out of your soaked channel and he lay on the bed, his head propped up on one elbow, his dick full and swollen at your hip, still shining with your combined fluids. Your body trembled with the aftershocks of your intense orgasm, and you practically purred when Chris gently ran his fingertips over your breasts;

“That was fuckin’ amazing… I’m probably going about this the wrong way, but can I buy you dinner?”

“That’d be nice”

Dinner had been a fun affair; you had redressed, and Chris had worn his stealth suit pants but just wore the thin Under Armour undershirt instead of the full suit. Although the hotel was well used to people in cosplay costumes during the conventions using their facilities, Chris didn’t want to draw attention to himself, instead he wanted his sole attention to be able to be on you rather than people asking for photos. Throughout your meal the conversation had been fun and light, Chris telling you how he had in fact auditioned for the Marvel role but didn’t envy the craziness that came with the now worldwide recognition that Jensen had to put up with. You had explained how you now worked for a theatrical costumer’s agency on the West Coast, but had heard about some openings for a new series production out of Vancouver.

Chris laughed softly;

“Typical… I fall for a girl that lives on the opposite side of the country”

“You… you’ve fallen for me?”

Chris paused, resting his hand over yours;

“I’m sorry, I’m kinda sappy when it comes to relationships… and I gotta be honest, when I saw you at the bar, I recognised you from your Instagram and when you helped me… I was trying to play it cool…” he took a deep breath; “I hope I’m not scaring you off…”

Leaning forward you pressed a kiss to his cheek;

“No… it’s nice… its more than nice…”

Once the meal was over the pair of you stood in the foyer, unsure what to do before Chris pointed out the rest of his costume was in your room.

“Where are you staying tonight?”

“I was meant to be crashing on a friends couch”

Grinning you pulled him close;

“Did you want a bed rather than a couch?”

“Fuck yes”

Minutes later you were crashing in the door to your room, Chris’s hands and lips trying to cover every inch of your body, and this time with the knowledge of how his costume worked you knew exactly how to get his pants open, tugging them to the floor as you pushed him into one of the chairs and knelt at his booted feet. With his dick in your mouth he was soon hard again, but that was when he took control, standing and moving you until you were knelt on the soft chair arms looking out of the high rise window over the convention center and city below, the lights of the city oblivious as he flipped your skirt up and pulled your panties down, and filled you with one smooth thrust;

“Fuck… this pussy is fuckin’ perfect, you feel like heaven…”

Wrapping his strong arms around you he pulled you flush with his hard chest, sucking at your neck as his dick rubbed so beautifully against your g-spot you were coming again, screaming out your release as Chris pulled out and lifted you, pulling you to your feet before you found yourself pressed against the wall and he filled you again.

Clinging to his wide shoulders you felt him filling you over and over, your pleasure climbing higher than you ever thought possible. Chris’s strong arms were holding you up, his large hands gripping your ass as he fucked you into the wall, your legs wrapped around his narrow waist;

“Chris, I’m gonna cum…”

“That’s it, cum for me, let me feel that pussy milking me as I fill you up… you feel so good, I’m never letting this pussy go…”

As you came so did he, your walls squeezing him so tight he thought he may pass out from the sheer pleasure. For the longest time he just held you there, your bodies joined until Chris’s dick softened enough to slip out of you. Letting your feet fall to the ground you kissed as you made your way to the bed, falling onto the mattress before wrapping the covers around your flushed bodies, falling asleep soon after.

The sound of a phone ringing pulled you from sleep, the warm body next to you grumbling at the sound before it rapidly jumped out of bed;

“Fuck, that’s my phone”

Through bleary eyes you watched Chris’s naked ass as he rummaged through the piles of clothing on the floor, finding his phone and answering it just in time;

“Yeah… uh-huh… for real?! Yeah absolutely! Send me the details, I’ll be there!”

You watched as he listened a little longer before ending the call, turning to you and he had the biggest smile on his face;

“I might have gotten a part!”

“Really? That’s amazing!”

“Yeah, they want me to do some screen tests with a possible co-star, see if there’s chemistry”

Jumping out of bed you ran and hugged him, kissing him deeply as he carried you back to the bed;

“I feel like celebrating… how about breakfast in bed?”

“Ok, I’ll call room serv… oh…”

Chris was pushing your legs apart and kissing up your inner thigh, and that’s when you realised he was talking about a different kind of breakfast in bed. As you lay back and enjoyed the magic he could perform with his tongue, you blissed out from pleasure.

Three Weeks Later

Chris finished the last scene, the director calling cut and he grinned as he looked at his castmates. None of them could quite believe how they were there, standing in a cold and rainy British Columbia small town, with writers and directors that had been trying to get their series picked up for years.

The rest of the cast of ‘Supernatural’ was a small ensemble, and having been given the role of the older brother; Dean Winchester, Chris felt at home with the role and had been given he contract straight after his screen test with his on screen brother Sam. Laughing with the actor that played Sam - a native New Yorker by the name of Sebastian - the two of them had immediately clicked and their friendship and on screen chemistry shone through the camera.

“Hey Evans, Stan!”

The sound of the producer’s voice caught Chris’s attention;

“Yeah?”

They need you two back at the studio, costume fitting”

“Sure thing”

The sound of the small doorbell that had been fitted on the counter drew your attention from the racks in the back room, calling out for your new arrival that you’d be out in a second. The job you’d applied for in Vancouver had pulled through, and it was your first week. A new show that needed a lot of men’s casual wear, yet things like jeans and jackets needed seams strengthened for fight scenes and pockets added for prop weapons. You were yet to meet the two main stars of the show, the casting having not been fully finalised until just days ago, and everything was hush-hush until it was going to be announced at one of the late summer conventions.

Dumping the armfuls of clothing onto the counter you turned and almost fainted;

“Chris?!”

For a second he looked in shock before he vaulted the counter, and took you into his arms;

“You’re here? You’re really here?”

“You’re the star?! You didn’t tell me!”

You kissed him deeply, before a quiet cough from behind Chris drew your attention, Chris turning;

“Seb, I want you to meet the girl I was telling you about”

The other guy raised an eyebrow;

“You’re THE girl? Wow, it’s a pleasure to meet you” he held his hand out over the counter and you shook it, Chris still holding you in his arms; “I’m Sebastian but everyone calls me Seb”

Looking at the two of them you knew in that moment the show was going to be a hit, and you looked forward to making these two look even better on screen… if that was even possible.

#chris evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans smut #chris evans x reader #chris evans x you

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artificialqueens · 3 years

Text

Cause Though the Truth May Vary, This Ship Will Carry (Gigi/Nicky) - Campvanjie

AN: Based on the prompt: “You weren’t supposed to hear that.” - “Well, you shouldn’t be saying it then.” A slight AU Gigi/Nicky, little bit of unrequited crushing and a lot of fate, originally posted to my old AO3 account on May 24th, 2020. Edited as well to add non-binary pronouns for Gigi out of drag, as the original used male pronouns. Don’t worry, I’m the original author and only want all of my stories collected under one pen name.

Summary: Nicky and Gigi strike up a friendship online, but just can’t meet until the time’s exactly right.

CW: slight mentions of homophobia.

The sun’s almost setting on an August day when Gigi flicks through the games in their library, bored of sniping enemies from rooftops, set on finding something else that has a competitive mode, kicking underneath the bed to find their headset. It would probably be best to at least try to talk to other people, and maybe even count up all the times people call each other gay without even realizing they’re talking to someone, who’s made sixteen dollars an hour dressing up as a girl and working at the rock climbing wall for all of high school.

There’s gay, and then there’s Gigi Goode; with a closet hanging full of custom couture, not that they’d ever admit to their mom that her work isn’t the worst.

There’s only one player in the team’s group chat, as Gigi adjusts their headset so they can talk into the mic.

“Hello?”

“Hey.”

“Hi!”, laughs the voice in his headphones; crackling as Gigi shoots and blows apart a box in the game’s lobby. There’s an accent there he can’t quite place, not that it matters so much, since the guy on the other end easily guides him through the map and even cracks a couple of jokes as one of the other team’s players is booted off a cliff. Maybe he’s Spanish, or Russian, since there are lot of Russian people on the server at this time of almost- night.

They queue for another round, his player’s character stopping next to a poster of one of the girls in the game.

“I like her, do you?”, he asks, and Gigi cringes a little. Straight guys were fucking exhausting, but this was just embarrassing-

“Like, this coat, with the belt like this, makes her waist look like she is a wasp. The insect, not the white people.”, he keeps talking, and Gigi’s eyes widen a little.

“Yeah, I’d buy those boots.”, they joke, hoping that whoever it is, will take it in stride, and he won’t have to listen to someone who’d been cool for the past half an hour, suddenly start losing their mind over how gay that was to say out loud.

“The boots? I want this hair- I want just Mortal Kombat hair but like this color, and maybe instead of a gun I want the scepter, like Sailor Jupiter. You’ve seen that, yes?”

Gigi blinks a couple of times. He’s serious?

“Like, of course. Yeah.”

“She’s a Mugler bitch. Hm, aren’t you?”, the voice teases on the other end; kicking at one of the boxes in the game.

Gigi is silent, as their queue timer runs out, and their team join another game which is already active when they’re dropped in.

“It’s the Hermes winter collection.”

“What?”

“That jacket is a dupe from the Hermes winter collection. You said Mugler-”, Gigi repeats, blasting through a wall in the game.

“Oh- oh you’re saying- this past winter! Of course! Maybe someone on the design team is also a fan?”

“Maybe.”

The two of them finish the round, and Gigi eagerly hits yes; when a little box pops up to add TheNickyDoll to their friends list.

(Gigi adds him back on Discord, too- because they’re probably not taking the Xbox to college, and then, they can send pictures right away.

He’s not a serial killer, and he’s cute.

Gigi can’t help but wonder if Nicky thinks the same of them.)

They slowly knit together in between Gigi’s first semester, and when Nicky moves into a new apartment in the eleventh arrondissement in Paris, and pops a bottle of champagne against his camera on his phone, propped up in his new kitchen. He plays with the zipper on his hoodie, and Gigi still can’t help but be surprised with how simple his wardrobe is.

Gigi spends hours carefully curating their wardrobe, though they supposed in Europe, there were just better pickings.

“Don’t you have friends?”, Gigi jokes, shirtless against the white brick walls of their dorm.

“Everyone will be over later, but I just wanted to do a toast for your timezone. It will be like three am for you when everyone else gets off work.”

“So this is a private party? Well… okay let me get my card.”

“Seriously? Not that kind of party!”

“Didn’t say it was. Congratulations, by the way. I got you something! Well like, I found it, and it’s so you-“

Gigi flicks the camera to face forwards, swinging to a painting hanging in the closet.

“Aw, well you didn’t have to- what the fuck is that?”

“Putin! I painted him in like the eighth grade. My mom was dropping off some stuff last weekend and I can mail him-“

Nicky’s eyebrows shoot up, pots and pans clattering on the other end of the line.

“Bitch, I am trying to not be the victim of a hate crime.”

Gigi laughs a little bit, flipping the camera back to focus on their face.

“I never asked, what do you even do?”

“What?”

“Like you- you have a job right? What’s your job?”

“Ah, I’m working, well I worked at a makeup store, but now I have some contracts, and maybe, you know- this neighborhood is where all the bars and the clubs are. If there’s no work on the runways maybe some will be looking for new girls.”

Gigi’s cheeks run hot for a moment.

“Wait, you- you’re a girl?”, they ask weakly, hoping it won’t absolutely ruin their entire… whatever it is, when you’d rather have a private housewarming alone in bed, than pretend to enjoy the beers that are flowing through the rest of the hall downstairs.

“Only when I’m being paid. Do you know- well, you have to in America you have RuPaul’s show- it’s like that-“

“You do drag? Wait, really?”

“Shhhh.”, he stops them, pressing a finger between his lips. “It’s like, I haven’t got any bookings yet but some of the clubs are interested- some of the parties, too. I can be a bottle girl.”

Gigi simply blinks repeatedly in the screen.

“What- is that too gay? I thought we were both pretty gay.”

“Yeah. Yeah. Hey-“, Gigi keeps the camera on their face, their eyes flicking up towards the naked mannequin resting against the closet door. Most of Gigi’s things were still at home, but there was a black feathered swimsuit they’d been working on- if they took out the waist just a bit-

“What’s your favorite color?”

“Wow, we are getting deep in, Dr Phil.”

“Seriously, what is it?”

“I’m feeling pink recently. Usually just- something simple. Blue. Black. It’s soothing.”

“Black is not a color.”

“Then it’s my favorite not-color.” Nicky pours from the bottle into a flute on her counter. “Get something to drink, come on.”

“Uh-“

“Doesn’t matter what. Come on!”

Gigi reaches for Red Bull, yesterday’s alcohol mixed into it, tangy and stale in the metal can.

“Okay.”

“Pace a Salute!”, Nicky cheers, and they clink their drinks against the camera.

Two months later, there’s a wrapped package on his stoop, covered in foreign postage, wet at the edges like it’s been through- what Americans would call the ringer, the labels so scratched over he can barely make out the return address, when he cuts the cardboard open on his kitchen counter.

If this was that stupid Putin painting, he was deleting Gigi from his entire life-

Inside, is fabric folded in paper, a little cloth ribbon tied around where a card is tucked in.

“I dont know what your actual skin tone is because you need better lights but merry Christmas if it doesn’t fit or doesn’t match sell it on eBay and get better lights”,

Gigi has written, in neat, large letters.

Nicky carefully unfurls the rest of it, and there’s a blue and pink bodysuit inside, accented with green and yellow panels that glitter like the facets of a diamond, and a yellow jacket, the bottom cut off just below the ribs, hemmed in thick stitches so the fabric won’t roll up.

Had Gigi gone and had this made? Or was it off the rack?, he wondered, digging for price tags and labels in the fabric.

Nothing.

Shit.

He fires off a message to Gigi, who is still showing as offline, given it’s probably six in the morning where he is.

14:17

How much is this “gift” you got me? Wtf…

FaceTime me later.

There’s predictably no response, and that night; he paints carefully in the mirror in his bedroom, laying out the little black dress he had chosen for the performance on his bed.

At the very last minute though, it’s that little suit from Gigi that wins out, nude panels sliding over his tights as he shimmies in front of the mirror.

It’s not perfect, but it all looks very nice.

When later comes, Gigi is wearing a red wig with blonde streaks that she runs her long fingers through, winking at the camera.

“My mom’s actually a professional seamstress. It didn’t cost anything, babe.”, she says with a little shrug, a tight yellow dress barely moving around his shoulders. There’s always a party here; and Gigi can’t imagine hating it more, the little college town bigger than he was used to, and yet still- too small for what she really wanted.

“If you want other stuff, I’ll send it. There’s lots of stuff that I don’t really wear anymore and we kind of have the same style. It’s not like anyone can say anything, then they’d have to admit they’ve seen me out in public. Or I could even make you something, I’m bored all the time.”

“Why are you doing this?”, Nicky asks.

“I dunno. It’s not like you’re my competition. You’re my friend.”

19:41

Anyway, I’m dropping out of school, getting a nose job and moving out to LA.

Gigi types out on their phone, underneath the table at their family’s annual thanksgiving dinner.

19:41

Maybe not all at once.

Nicky’s reply comes lightning fast- making Gigi grin.

“Are you seriously getting nudes right now?”, one of their brothers asks, and their mother glares at the both of them over the table.

“I’m getting some new sketches from my atlier in Paris.”, they seethe, glancing back down at the floor. Nicky’s been trying to teach him French, like it’s something that occupies them so that Gigi doesn’t implode; in between sending him links to his favorite shows to watch, and YouTube links to makeup tutorials.

(He still hasn’t figured out if Nicky means it; or if he’s trying to be shady, and just doesn’t know how.)

“Atlier is where you get the clothes made, dumbass. Mom’s sewing room isn’t Paris.”

“Shut up!”

“All of you just stop-”

19:43

It’s a hard time in life in general.

Try not to listen so much to those voices in your head.

Nicky’s text pops up with a loud, mechanical pinging noise, three dots still hovering under the message as Gigi forces looks up from the screen and glowers across the table as they reach for more baby carrots.

19:43

Make mistakes, but not too many, haha. You’ll figure it out.

If it makes you feel a little bit better, I’m moving to San Fran

19:43

What? For real?

Gigi’s nails frantically tap over the screen.

19:45

Yes! I bought a ticket.

And my husband called an immigration lawyer, we’re going to get my green card situation set.

“Lawyer-”, Gigi gasps; and their entire family pauses, glancing over the table at them.

“Jesus Christ. You did it, didn’t you? You got arrested your first semester, and you weren’t even gonna tell us-”

“You weren’t supposed to hear that.”, they snap, flipping the bird at their oldest brother.

“Well, you shouldn’t be saying it then.”

Their whole table erupts in a discussion Gigi can’t pay any attention to.

19:50

Cool.

That means I get to see you soon.

It’s gonna be great.

They taps ou, and close the app with a smile.

They hadn’t known if Nicky even had a boyfriend, not that it mattered; until it did.

Apparently; he had been married, for almost the whole time they had known each other- a blow Gigi hadn’t quite expected, to leave them as breathless as landing in Los Angeles; the shock not setting in, not in full, anyway- until they are standing in a new apartment, looking down at a menu of instructions on how to set up the wifi in the unit, fingers hovering over everyone in contacts.

They can’t call their mom; not this soon, and their brothers would tell her, and the whole plan would crumble; just like everything had with Nicky; whose calls Gigi had declined for the past solid month; the nights they had spent with their phones propped up behind desks and dressing room mirrors fading into something beyond memory; that they refused to think about any more than they had to, the messages asking if they’re alright answered in curt, short replies.

How could they have been so stupid, thinking that they were talking-talking, teasing that Nicky and they were friends; when Gigi didn’t even know what his real name was.

(Unless it was Nicky?)

Shit.

Gigi waits for their phone to load into the app, and refreshes the friends list a couple of times, until they can see Nicky’s icon at the top, the side of the circle cut through with a little green dot, and taps twice to start a call.

“Hi?”

Nicky’s greeting floats in the air, between a breath and utter silence before Gigi swallows their pride, pressing the phone to the side of their face.

“What do you know about connecting a router to a tower if I live on the…um third floor?”

The line crackles, but soon there’s a tiny, familiar chuckle. “First of all, that is not how you do any of that-”

They talk a little more, every day; in between, Nicky moves to New York and Gigi cuts a tape that they put in the mail with a wink. They’re due for a visit home soon, and carefully proposes- maybe it’s time they meet Nicky. New York isn’t far at all, and a layover would make for a cheaper flight, anyway.

Their plans stack up in hours of calls; and Gigi think they’re almost back to normal. Until, three days before the flight is supposed to leave, there’s a call they had forgotten to wait for, and their fingers hover over the message box below Nicky’s name, vibrating with anxiety and excitement all at once.

09:22

Hey. I had a family thing come up.

Gigi types, and then erases the text, steeling themselves as they taps out another one that makes a little more sense, and doesn’t seem like such a lie.

09:30

I’m so so so so sorry about this

I had some things come up and my trip fell through.

They send this instead, surprised to see Nicky start typing back immediately.

09:35

You’re not going to believe this

I have some work things that started recently and so it would have been really shitty to have a guest over now.

09:35

No way!

09:37

Yeah. :(( But we’re gonna hang out someday, I swear!

09:37

Dont worry! You’re definitely gonna see me.

Real real real soon!

“-Where do I go?”, Gigi asks, pulling at the bottom hem of the ornate jacket she wore, fiddling with the gold telescope in her hands. The lights behind the set burned brightly, making the thicker bottoms of the outfit feel much warmer than he had remembered them being.

“Go to that green square on the ground, and wait there, when you see the little arrow light up, you can enter the Werk Room and then we’ll have you stop inside, get your opening line, and let you see the other girls.”

“Okay.”

He does as he’s told, prancing in and kicking his boots in front of him as the lights move to capture Gigi’s entrance, his head only snapping to the side when given the signal, so he can see the others who are already crowded around the pink tables he’s only dreamed of seeing for so long.

“Holy Shit…Nicky?!”

In reality; Gigi can see far more of the detail of Nicky’s face; of her eyebrows and carefully painted cheeks and lashes, of all the effort that they had only really talked about, his eternal summer tan and the long fringe of black hair that he’s always nudging across his forehead, or slicked against a beanie, gone behind a platinum blonde veneer that’s so much brighter than Gigi has ever seen. She’s thinner, and taller, careful breaths underneath sequinned shoulder pads, knees knocking together as she gasps.

“Gigi!”

Widow and Crystal glance at each other over the pink table.

“Hold up, you guys know each other?”

In the flesh; Gigi is impossibly small, the sharp angles of her face, and the dark brown hair that sticks up in angles which Nicky traces against the white of his pillows in his bedroom on the screen of his phone in the morning, taped underneath a gold-tipped pirate hat, and lush, wavy curls. She looks like a model on the runways where Nicky used to work; so close to him that he can feel Gigi’s breath on the back of his hand, as he tightens his grip around the epaulets on her shoulder.

“Gigi Goode.”, she repeats, and Gigi giggles a little at that.

“The Nicky Doll.”, she laughs, and her voice sounds so much more solid, than it ever has over every crossed wire.

Gigi’s hand swings, squeezing Nicky’s tightly as they swing around the table; like the others who are there don’t matter at all. She rests her head on Nicky’s padded shoulder, cocking it just slightly, waiting there, as Crystal’s eyes flash at the scene before them.

“…and may the best woman win.”, Gigi whispers, only for Nicky to hear.

#rpdr fanfiction #nicky doll #gigi goode #gigi x nicky #pre-ship #fluff #online friends au #s12 #on set fic #queen au #campvanjie #concrit welcome

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dysphorie · 4 years

Text

The Slipknot Incident

Anon, I’m an idiot and tunglr is a functioning website, so I lost your ask while trying to edit shit SO it was just easier to write this up. I doubt many people want to know, and I don’t blame them. It probably wouldn’t seem like a big deal to someone it didn’t happen to! And maybe I should just still be keeping it to myself, because who cares! Amirite? But no. I’ve decided that I want to write it all out for ME. So. Very long post ahead and I’m sorry about that but you need to know EVERYTHING for it all to really make sense.

So, flashback to 1999. I'm 15-turning 16. I have this boyfriend, kirk. He's obsessed with kurt cobain and everything grunge, and uses this to belittle the fact I like all kinds of music, particularly heavy stuff.

He was also an abusive cunt. Verbally and physically. Very controlling, HATED it if i went in the mosh pit (which I L O V E D, and glasgow moshpits are legendarily rough) because "that's not what girls do. And i know this is wrong, and he's wrong, and I shouldn’t put up with it, but I do! Cos I'm 16 and "in love"!

I also have two big sisters, one of which is...a handful. Very dramatic, very argumentative, and very good at getting people to take her side (steeeeeeff you've got to let her take xyz of your things, she has a baaaaaaaaybeee!) We get on amazingly NOW, but then not so much.

So, fastforward to Feb 2000. Slipknot are playing at glasgow barrowlands, my favourite venue ever, and slipknot were already my favourite band (s/t had hit, the world went wild). And I managed to get two tickets!! So kirk tells me in no uncertain terms that I've to give one to his little sister, nicky, who is a year younger than me. I'm like um ok sure, cos i hadn't planned who i was going with yet, my mum just got two tickets just in case. So I say i will, and that's that.

But oh no it isn’t. because my aforementioned sisters birthday is at the end of Feb! And my family are like, you’re giving her the other ticket, right? And no amount of no, I already promised it to Nicky would suffice. Because SHE’S YOUR SISTER AND SHE NEVER GETS TO DO ANYTHING COS SHE HAS A BAAAAAYBEEEEEEE. She didn’t, and doesn’t like Slipknot or either of the support act (Kittie and, thankfully, my good pals One Minute Silence who I’ve seen more times than I’ve had hot dinners)

So I explain this to Kirk, sitting in his room one day. He. Goes. B a l l i s t i c. I’ll miss the details but he explains that I WILL find a way for Nicky to go to this sold-out gig and, actually, him too while I’m at it. Because I have a reputation for being able to blag onto guest lists, it shouldn’t be too hard, right? So ofc I’m scared and promise I will.

The day or so before the gig, Slipknot did a signing in a Virgin Megastore that had recently opened. My friends and I were so excited, we were there from crazy early in the morning to get stuff signed (there ARE photos somewhere in the ether, who knows where, not me). But I’m also terrified Kirk’s gonna find out I’m there, cos he didn’t want me to go. That’s it. We had no idea what the band looked like yet so it wasn’t that kind of jealousy. But anyway...

The signing was great. Got my shit signed, Sid and Chris were weird assholes cos that was their schtick, Jim and Mick gave me the best cuddles, CRAIG SPOKE TO ME cos I have him a wee pin badge and he mumbled “No one ever gives me anything...”, and I gave Joey and Corey nailpolish. Joey looked terrified, Corey was incredibly thankful, and pulled me in for a hug. That he wouldn’t let me out of (not in a forceful way, just in a heeeeey lady let me hug on you for a while) and I’m like uh *panics in 16 not that he knows that cos tattoos and piercings and huuuuuuge boobs* and he says some very suggestive things and my friend said aye she’s into all that freaky shit too and I’m dying inside. Offers were made, I said uh lol maybe bye, and go home on cloud nine.

Until my friend who spoke to Corey tells Kirk what happened. Thankfully I wasn’t gonna see him until nearly door opening gig time, but the phonecall we had was...unpleasant.

So it’s the day of the gig, I go to Glasgow stupid early to meet the OMS boys and beg and plead for them to put Kirk and his sister on the guest list. And they do! Because I cry and tell them everything and I have to make their singer promise not to wait outside and beat him up. I could tell you what I was wearing: a deftones baseball ringer I lost my birginity in, baggies, and a powerpuff girls hoodie. My hair was blonde and green. I was wearing my favourite converse that Kirk hates because they were All-Stars, not One-Stars. And Corey wore All-Stars, was I wearing them because HE wore them?

My sister turns up before the doors open. I’m at the front of the queue cos I want to be down the front. My sister and Kirk are both like lol no, because YOU need to look after your sister (who is 24 to my 16 at this point) because she’s tiny and I go to more gigs, and Kirk doesn’t want me anywhere near the front or the pit. Doesn’t want me to corrupt his sister. But she begs me to take her in the pit for “Spit It Out” and I promise I will.

OMS are incredible, Kittie were ok, Talena tried to crowdsurf and got dropped. I turned around to talk to my sister about it and she was...gone. I checked the bar. Nothing. The toilets. Nada. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck we’re supposed to get the last train home together, I HAVE to find her. Slipknot come on. We’re standing up the back near the bar, and he has a deathgrip on my wrist so I don’t run off. Then I think I see my sister!! I beg to go to her, he lets me go, but I can’t find her, then I can’t find my way back to him. By the time I do, he accuses me of finding and kissing my friend Mark (my best friend who I’d actually recently fallen out with and hadn’t spoken to in months and only knew he was at the gig cos I saw him at the signing. I didn’t see him at the gig). I don’t find my sister.

Kirk decides it’s time to go, so literally drags us away. As we’re nearly out the crowd, “Spit It Out” starts, and I rip my arm away from him and grab his sister, tell him FUCK YOU, WE’RE DOING THIS. So we do. For about...a minute or so. Then something grips my right wrist so hard and so tight I thought it was going to crumble. I literally trip over my feet as he drags me back out the crowd and out of the ballroom.

Now the Barrowlands has a set of couches just outside the main hall, it’s a popular meeting place, so I pulled away again there and said NO, I have to wait for my sister, I’ll see him later, he can go home. Furiously he stomps away. So I sit and wait. And wait. And wait. The entire venue empties and my sister is nowhere to be seen. Turns out she left just as Slipknot started and went home, and yes I got in trouble for that despite the fact she fucked off. The venue staff need me to leave. I’ve missed the last train, I don’t know what I’m going to do. So I walk outside thinking maybe I’ll see a friend I can stay with.

And there’s Kirk and Nicky. Standing by their dad’s car. Hey come stay with me, I didn’t want to go til I knew you were ok, he says, sweet as pie. We get home, everyone goes to bed.

Where he put self-titled on repeat, very low on his stereo, and proceeded to do some of the most horrific things that have every happened to me in my life, over the course of basically the entire night. I’m going to stay non-specific, but if you can imagine it, it probably happened. Including yes, what you’re definitely thinking of now. And he told me it was all my fault. Because I was weak and couldn’t say no. Because I was a slut who’d catch something by fucking a guy in a band just to say I’d fucked someone in a band. That he’d make sure Corey wouldn’t want me if I ever met him again. That it was my fault for talking to another, older man. I was getting what I deserved. He plugged his big fancy headphones into the stereo and made me listen to my favourite tracks over and over and over during some of it, and I didn’t dare make a noise because if his parents found out, if anyone found out, he’d kill me. And I believed him, because he kept a bolt gun in his bedside drawer, liked to pretend he was going to shoot himself with it it upset me and make me beg him not to. He said he’d make me do it to myself maybe, to keep his hands clean. I believed every word.

I went home the next day packed with toilet tissue that I had to clench to keep in place because my underwear had been ripped, not that it mattered because it was covered in blood anyway. When I got home I got a bollocking and grounded because of the shit with my sister. She remembers none of it, but she’ll still insist it was probably my fault she left.

When I saw that Slipknot weren’t playing “Spit It Out” in January I literally cried tears of relief. It took me a long time to be able to listen to Slipknot again, and when I did I was made fun of for liking them, which made healing harder because I was just trying to reclaim this thing that had given me such comfort in the past. So I’ve always kinda kept my love of them to myself.

But when I hear “Spit It Out”, I feel his fingers close around my wrist. I feel the bones click and roll. And normally I can turn the song off if I’m having a bad day, but I couldn’t exactly do that live. That’s a huge part of why I feel me like, reclaiming Slipknot this past year was just...meant to happen. It was nearly 20 years to the day, I bought the tickets with MY money and was going MYSELF for MYSELF, they weren’t playing a song that I might have a fucking breakdown to. I met amazing people. I did EVERYTHING on MY terms.

Honestly I’ll never be healed of it. Duh. But I can talk about it now because I’ve had closure. I took back what was taken from me. Can’t make up for the missed gigs taken from me and the like but meh, that’s nothing compared to what it’s given me.

#long post #trigger warning: just fucking everything #the slipknot trauma story #don't lose

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monstersandmaw · 5 years

Text

Male sharkman/samebito x male reader (nsfw) *commission*

Edit which I’m including in all my works after plagiarism and theft has taken place: I do not give my consent for my works to be used, copied, published, or posted anywhere. They are copyrighted and belong to me.

This was one of my five commission slots, and was huge fun to write since I’ve never had the pleasure of writing a sharkman (ie, has a shark upper half!). I really hope you enjoy it!

---

With a week to kill until you started your new job, you dragged yourself out of your new apartment full of boxes and bags late one evening, fed up with tripping over disembowelled boxes. Feeling halfway to being hungry, you really just wanted to stretch your legs and have a break from pretending to unpack.

The tang of the sea in the air was surprisingly nice after the stuffiness of the big city, but that didn’t mean you’d be going for a swim anytime soon. You shivered at the thought of that much water on all sides, and instead satisfied yourself with a walk along the seafront. It was a pretty, quaint town, with turn-of-the-century apartment buildings lining the road that ran along the beach front, and there was even an old pier with a boardwalk and amusement arcade.

Seagulls shrieked at the sky as the stars began to wake up above them, and you took a deep breath, stuffing your hands into your jacket pockets. A new start in a town where you knew no one at all was all very well, but the reality of it was a bit more daunting than perhaps you’d realised. The sea washed against the shingles below and you turned away from the water and crossed the road, heading towards the livelier part of the beach-front.

Just across the street from the pier was an apparently very popular nightclub. Even at a distance the air throbbed with its music, and people formed a ragged line along the pavement, waiting to be let in.

You walked along the line of jostling and laughing people and caught snatches of their conversations. A faun with her antlers painted in swirls of glowing colours for the evening gasped and hissed, “I didn’t know samebito could live out of the water…” and you frowned.

Samebito were otherwise known as sharkfolk or sharkmen/women, and they were pretty rare. You also hadn't known they could live out of the water, but it wasn’t until you neared the head of the queue that you saw your first one in real life. With the head of a great white shark, the figure was colossal. Wearing a black t-shirt with the club’s logo that just barely stretched across his sculpted chest, this samebito was clearly the bouncer, and as you kept walking - albeit at a slower pace so that you could watch a little longer - you saw him joking and laughing with the people who were at the very front of the queue.

Suddenly someone got elbowed and a snarl went up, and a bit of a scuffle broke out as a gnoll’s patience ran out and she tried to barge her way forwards.

The samebito drew his lips back to reveal a heck of a lot of teeth, and loomed over the gnoll, flexing his shoulders just a little bit, and she suddenly decided that in fact she didn’t mind waiting. It was a gesture that you found surprisingly attractive, but a second later, the samebito had returned to his conversation with the folks at the front, almost as though nothing had happened. You did notice, however, that he kept half an eye on the rest of the line.

“Hey, Tai?” one of the folks a few people back in the queue called and the samebito looked up.

“Yeah?”

“How long’s the wait you reckon?”

He shrugged and grinned. “You’ve got maybe another ten minutes til you’re in…”

And then you were drawing level with him, and he glanced at you as you neared him.

To your surprise, he winked at you. It wasn’t the normal wink of a land creature, more of a rolling of the white of his eye, but still, you took it for what it was and tossed him a lopsided half-smile and kept on walking. Something inside you had leapt joyously at the fact that a being as powerful and undeniably beautiful - in a brutal, almost primeval kind of way - had not only bothered to notice you, but had then acknowledged you as well.

Smiling privately to yourself, you continued on your evening stroll, passing coffee shops and souvenir shops now closed for the night, and finally found yourself back at your messy apartment, with the edge taken off your restlessness and a readiness for sleep beginning to creep into your muscles.

After a week of cloudy or rainy autumn weather, it came as a pleasant surprise when the next day dawned clear but still cool. After fumbling around for some clean clothes, you thought vaguely about going and getting some coffee from one of the waterfront cafes you’d seen on your walk the previous night. You certainly hadn’t got as far as buying any in yet, and you wouldn’t make it through the morning without a hit of caffeine to help you along.

Stifling a yawn, you made your way past the club where you’d seen the samebito, and recalled his wink with a flaring warmth and another private smile. The club was closed up now; quiet and dormant, waiting for the nightlife to return with the sunset, and there was no sign of the sharkman.

The coffee at the Pier View Cafe was actually pretty decent, and you sank down into a chair outside to sip it and savour the warmth of the morning sun on your bare forearms. After maybe ten minutes, spent alternately scrolling through your usual sites on your phone and gazing off into the glittering waves in the distance, you caught sight of a massive figure leaving one of the beach-front buildings not twenty yards from where you were sat. At nearly eight feet tall and about half as wide at the shoulders, with grey skin and the head of a great white shark, there was no mistaking him. The bouncer from the previous night turned from locking the door, took three paces up the street towards you, and then halted briefly when he saw you looking at him.

Heat flushed your cheeks and you looked away awkwardly, but when you risked a look up again, you saw to your horror that he was walking over. Perhaps he thought you were stalking him? All sorts of scenarios - each one marginally more ridiculous than the last one - played through your head until you swallowed them down and took a deep breath. The samebito was standing in front of you, grinning down at you and blocking out the sunlight better than a flipping eclipse.

“Hey,” he said in a gravelly, deep voice that threatened to make you entirely inarticulate.

“Uh… Hi…?” you croaked, craning your neck up at him.

He chuckled and held out a grey-skinned, knuckly, strong hand and you shook it instinctively. “So… I saw you last night, didn’t I?” he asked warmly, and you nodded. “Didn’t fancy dancing though?” he added.

You liked the playful lilt to his voice, halfway between an accent and an undertone, and before it could render you speechless, you shook your head. “Not so much.”

Again, a rumbling laugh rolled off him. “You’re new here, aren't you?”

“What makes you say that?”

The samebito took half a step back from your table and shrugged one colossal shoulder. “Most of the real locals don’t stare at me the way you do.”

“I’m sorry,” you blurted, turning your gaze away from him.

He looked particularly handsome that morning, in a white t-shirt that showed his chest muscles off and hid practically nothing, and a pair of baggy, pale jeans. He’d cut and stitched a slit in the back of the t-shirt for his chunky dorsal fin, and it stood out as a nearly perfect triangle of smoky grey skin in the morning light.

“I… I moved here like… last week? I’ve never seen someone like you before. I didn’t mean to stare or make you uncomfortable.”

“It’s cool,” he said, ducking his head ever so slightly as if to gauge you a little better. “Listen, you’re cute and you’ve finished your drink. Will you let me get you another one?”

“Uh… I mean, I was just about to head off,” you said, gesturing vaguely and frowning, and honestly panicking just little bit. This kind of thing never happened to you. “You don’t have to. And anyway, shouldn’t I be the one offering to get you a drink after making an ass of myself?”

His grin and pointed look southwards towards your own ass spoke volumes, and you flushed darker, but he made no verbal comment, and just shook his head. “I’d like to. Don’t let me push you though. If you don’t want me to, then I’ll piss off…”

It was your turn to shake your head, and when he saw that you did really want the chance to get to know him a bit, he smiled broadly, showing all his array of serrated teeth.

“Great. What can I get you then?”

You told him and he nodded. “Man after my own heart,” he said and ducked inside the cafe, leaving you sitting in the chill breeze wafting in from offshore and wondering how you had got so lucky. Or, more accurately, what the catch would be…

He backed out of the cafe door a few minutes later, shoving it open with his perfect arse, with a cardboard takeaway cup in each hand, a brown paper takeaway bag swinging from his wrist by the handle, and a big smile on his face. When he caught you looking curiously at it, he laughed and said, “I like my sweets, ok? Oh, my name’s Tai by the way.” He looked comically from the coffee cups and then to you and said, “Help a shark out so he can shake your hand?”

Laughing, you took your cup off him and shook his hand. His skin was rough as fine-grit sandpaper, and though the grip was prodigiously strong you got the feeling he was definitely holding back.

Taking a deep breath, you told him your name and added, “You want to stay here or go for a walk?”

Tai gazed longingly down the quiet stretch of seafront and shrugged. “Walk sounds good? As long as you don’t mind if I chow down on the way? I’m starving.”

“Course not,” you said.

“So where’d you live before coming here?” he asked as you set off. “And why the hell did you move here of all places?”

“Work,” you said. “I don’t start til next week though, so I’ve got time to kill.” You tried to sip your coffee but it was still too hot, so you went on, “I lived in the city before.”

Tai shuddered dramatically and said, “Man, I couldn’t live without the sea.”

“I’m surprised you don’t actually live in the sea,” you said. “I mean… it doesn’t bother you?”

He shot you a sidelong look and said, “They don’t have TV or Wifi in the sea. Not yet, anyway. And pizza doesn’t do too well underwater either. Pizza is life…”

You snorted and he laughed with you. You liked the way he looked at you - the way his gaze lingered at the corners of your mouth and on your eyes - and you tried not to preen under his powerful stare.

“I do swim a lot though,” he added around an enormous bite of pastry before groaning. “Oh wow. They make the best Danish there,” he said, gesturing over his shoulder and flicking crumbs onto his shirt.

Feeling uncharacteristically bold, you reached up and brushed them off for him, and his smile widened. “I hate swimming,” you admitted, avoiding his gaze. “Well, I hate the water… being surrounded by it… not knowing what’s down there…” You fought off a shudder and he nodded.

“I can see that,” he said. “No, really, I can… I mean, I’m one of the things that folks don’t tend to argue with, on land or on sea, but just coz I’ve got a mouthful of pearly whites doesn’t mean there aren’t dangers out there. Still, I try and swim every morning.”

“Yeah?”

He nodded, pausing to take another bite and finish off the second croissant in the bag. “I like to race by best friends. Gotta stay sharp, you know?”

“They’re samebito like you?” you asked, trying the somewhat unfamiliar word out on your tongue. ‘Samebito’ wasn’t a word you used everyday after all.

He shook his head. “Nah, we don’t live in shoals or anything. No, Freya is a selkie and Viggo is an orca mer.”

Your eyebrows rose at that, and he chuckled another rough, happy laugh. “I know, you’d think I’d want to eat Freya, given that I’m a shark and she’s a seal - but I’m not a complete beast, I swear. We’ve been besties for years, and holy crap is she fast.” He took another sip of his coffee and groaned. “Ah that’s good. And yeah, Viggo is like a brother to me. He was involved in an accident with a fishing trawler about ten years ago, but that doesn't stop him beating me soundly almost every morning!” he laughed.

“Is he ok?” Life in the ocean seemed even more brutal than you had imagined.

Tai shrugged. “Lost his left arm and a fuck-ton of confidence, but yeah, he’s doing alright now.”

“Not all the dangers out there have teeth,” you offered quietly, turning your eyes to the relatively calm ocean on your right as you both made your way along the smooth tarmac of the seafront.

You and Tai continued to walk and chat long after he’d finished his breakfast and both of your coffee cups had been ditched in the bin. He had an odd and slightly brash sense of humour, and an open kind of confidence that drew you in and made you feel at ease around him.

The pier had all but dwindled out of sight when suddenly he glanced at his watch and cursed. “Fuck, I’ve got to be at work in ten minutes! I didn’t realise it was so late!”

“I didn’t know the club opened so early,” you ventured.

Tai shook his head. “I work part time as a swimming coach at the school on the edge of town. Got to hold down a couple of jobs if I wanna live like you landies do!” While you smiled, he added, “Listen, can I give you my number? I had fun…”

“Sure,” and in moments, the two of you had exchanged numbers and he’d promised to be in touch.

Without warning, he opened his arms and moved in for a hug before abruptly halting and asking, “Is that ok? I’m a hugger… but not everyone is…”

Shaking your head with a smile, you said, “It’s cool. Thanks though…”

The hug he gave you was polite but heartfelt, and you tried not to enjoy his looming closeness too much before he had pulled back and was jogging away with a jovial wave over his shoulder.

You watched him go, standing there for a long time with the sea breeze ruffling and messing up your hair before you followed in his wake and turned your footsteps back towards your apartment.

A few days slid by in a blur of unpacking and sorting, and getting stuff like internet and electricity contracts going, and while you were busy, you found your mind wandering back to Tai; his strong, grey hands in particular, though his muscular shoulders and arms were equally delicious. The power in his shark’s jaw must have been immense, but his smile, although toothy and broad, had been friendly and his sense of humour had kept you chuckling to yourself for days.

But there was no sign that he wanted to see you again. He didn’t call or text, and you’d sort of abandoned the idea of getting to know him better until one evening, perhaps four days after your walk along the seafront, when your phone buzzed just as you were tucking into a takeaway, with your feet up on the couch. Scrabbling around for your phone, you nearly dropped your food in your lap when you saw that the message was from Tai.

‘Hey I’m so sorry I didn’t call you,’ he began. ‘There was some drama at the club and it kind of took over my life for a bit. I know this might be super weird, but can I take you out for dinner some time? I had so much fun chatting with you the other day. Anyway, let me know either way, T x’

You weren’t used to someone being so free with their emotions and so confident about what they wanted, but it was reassuring and you replied that dinner would be great, and that you were free the next night.

‘Perfect!’ came his response. ‘Listen, I’d kind of like to surprise you, but is there anything you really wouldn’t want to do? I remember you said you didn’t like the water much so it wouldn’t involve boats or anything I promise :)!’

Anxiety did spike in your gut at the idea of a surprise date, if that was what he was suggesting, but deciding to throw caution to the wind and to start over anew here, you told him you were grateful that he remembered about your dislike of the water, and other than that, you were game for most things.

With everything sorted, he replied with a message full of emojis and exclamation marks that he was looking forward to seeing you and that he’d meet you in the centre of town the next evening since it was his night off. ‘Oh and don’t come fancy or anything - it won’t be posh…’

‘That’s… honestly a relief…’

‘Glad to hear it! See you tomorrow!!! :D x’ Again, you allowed yourself a bit of a goofy smile at the over-peppering of exclamation marks.

Wearing a smart-ish pair of jeans and your favourite t-shirt, you strode through town the next evening with a light feeling filling your chest for the first time in a long while. Things were definitely new and different here, and you just hoped that it would all turn out for the better.

A group of satyrs and fauns up ahead were laughing and joking with a pair of gnolls, the latter yipping and leaping around, and you stared openly at them as you passed, amazed at how the three species all seemed to be getting along so well. Back in the city, folks tended to let prejudices sit deeply and interactions like this would just never happen. Then again, you wouldn’t have found yourself on a date with a sharkman back in the city either.

You were still smiling to yourself about it when you saw him pacing up and down by the fountain in the middle of the square. Because of his size and unusual silhouette, he was instantly recognisable, but you supposed you were a bit ordinary and didn’t expect him to notice you until you were nearly level with him. However, he surprised you by turning his head suddenly, a little like a bird of prey, and waving expansively at you, calling your name and grinning. He had to be the most extroverted person you’d ever met.

A bit bashful, but still laughing, you joined him and he hugged you. “Sorry,” he mumbled as he drew back. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you…”

“It’s fine,” you smiled. “You look nice…” you added as you took in the jeans that hugged his muscular legs and made his arse look frankly incredible, and the dark blue t-shirt that seemed to bring out the blueish hues of his grey skin. In light of the street lamps in this part of town, his white markings seemed to glow, and you honestly thought he was one of the most beautiful creatures you’d ever laid eyes on.

“Glad you think so,” he rumbled quietly. “You wanna go? I hope you’re not afraid of heights…”

“Heights?”

He grinned down at you and said, “You’ll see. There’s plenty else to do there as well if you’re not into heights…” He sounded odd, like he was straining the point, but you let it slide. Perhaps he was as nervous as you were after all?

After a short walk across town, during which you listened to him decompressing about the drama at the club which had involved one of the patrons being harassed and some legal action being threatened, you quickly cottoned on to where he was leading you.

Music played and lights danced in the sky as you reached the fairground that had been set up on the edge of town for the harvest festival and to celebrate the end of summer. You began to laugh as he took your hand in his.

“No?” he asked, seeming to refer both to the fact that he was holding your hand and to the fair beyond. Although he had a shark’s upper body, he was still expressive and you caught the definite hint of worry in his dark blue eyes as he gazed down at you.

With a roll of your own eyes at him and a squeeze of your hand in his, you tugged him towards the fair.

“Phew,” he laughed. “You scared me for a moment there.”

“I’m sure you must go on dates all the time,” you said without really thinking, “But it’s been a while for me, ok? I just didn’t know what to expect, especially since… uh… I’ve not dated someone like you before.”

“Another guy or a shark?” he asked quietly. The sincerity in his voice was reassuring and you smiled.

“Shark,” you clarified.

“Right,” he said. “You hungry?”

“I could definitely eat,” you said. “How about there?” and you pointed to a noodle stand where a small queue was just beginning to form. It smelled amazing.

He’d just turned to look when a figure stumbled out of the haunted house ride to your right, laughing, her hand firmly held in that of the girl she was with, and when she saw Tai, she shrieked his name and practically skipped over to him, yanking the poor girl nearly off her feet.

“Freya!” he boomed, opening one arm to hug her without letting go of your hand.

“Omg!” she yipped when she saw you. “Is this him? Ah! He’s so handsome! Tai! You lucky little scrap of chum!”

You could only stand there awkwardly while Tai’s best friend cooed over the pair of you and then announced that she needed some food after the spooky ride. “You guys want to join us?” she asked brightly, her big dark eyes flitting from your face to Tai’s.

While she seemed lovely enough, you hadn’t really intended to share your date with anyone else, but to your surprise Tai immediately sensed that and said, “Uh, we were actually about to go… uh…” He gazed around and saw the ferris wheel and blurted, “Go on the wheel…”

A slow smile dawned on Freya’s face and her dark eyebrow rose. “Oh yeah?” she said. “Well don’t let me stop you, sweetheart.” And as Tai bid her and her girlfriend a good evening, you cast him a puzzled look to which he responded with a slight shake of his head.

You were still frowning curiously at him when the bar went down over your knees as you sat in the gondola, and he swallowed thickly.

“Tai?” you asked, looking up at him. Was it your imagination, or was the colouring under his chin slightly green? Perhaps it was the light of the fair below… “You ok?”

“I panicked,” he blurted.

“What?”

“I didn’t think you’d want her asking a million questions about your life just yet - I mean, I wasn’t even sure if this counted as a proper date or whatever - and so I just said the first thing that came into my mind, which was this…”

“And this is a problem because…?”

“I don’t like heights,” he said quietly as the gondola lurched backwards. “Oh gods…”

He gripped the bar so hard that you thought it was going to crumple under his strength. “Hey,” you said, reaching for his thigh and placing your palm on it. He was so tense that it was like putting your hand on a boulder. Taking advantage of the privacy of the moment, you dug your fingertips gently into the muscle. “Look at me,” you said as he stared wide-eyed into the void that was opening up beneath you.

“Freya knew,” he muttered.

“Forget her,” you chuckled. “Look at me.” And when he did, you put your other hand on his cheek and watched him heave out a gentle sigh. The gills in his neck flared wide but he leaned into your touch and laughed, the sound deep in his chest.

He leaned down and nuzzled the blunt tip of his snout against your neck. “I would kiss you,” he said gently, breath fanning across your skin, “But I can’t.”

He brought his hand to your cheek and trailed his thumb down your jaw line as he caressed you, and you felt a stirring in your cock as his fingers wandered downwards. He hadn’t even noticed that the gondola had done nearly a full rotation.

When it finally came round to getting everyone off the wheel, he seemed a lot calmer, though embarrassment had definitely washed in to replace his fear.

“Tai?” you asked as he stood near the ferris wheel with his hand on the railing, breathing deeply and steadily. “You ok?”

He laughed and shot you a sidelong look. “Yeah,” he sighed. “Just feeling a bit…”

“Queasy?”

“Foolish.”

You rapped him lightly on the bicep with the back of your fingers and grinned, “Hey, it’s nice to know that even someone like you can get a bit freaked out sometimes, you know?”

“That’s precisely the point,” he said. “I’m not used to it.”

“Ah, come on, lets have a walk,” you said, taking his hand. “Besides, I pretty much got to kiss you, so it’s not all bad.” You halted and looked up at him with mock suspicion on your face. “Unless it was all a ruse to get close to me…?”

“What? No!” he gasped, his footsteps halting. “I promise you…”

“Relax,” you said. “I was joking.”

He walked beside you for a few paces before murmuring, “You know I wouldn’t do something like that, right?”

You nodded.

Tai cleared his throat. “And actually, going back to something you mentioned earlier, I haven’t been on a lot of dates recently… or… at all.”

Now it was your turn to stop in surprise. “You’re kidding me?”

He shook his head. “Turns out apex predators give off ‘dangerous vibes’. That, and I’m nearly always working…”

“Huh,” you shrugged, still a little baffled. “I’m sorry for just assuming then…”

Tai put his arm around your shoulders and tugged you slightly off balance and into his side. “You want to go eat now?” he asked and you nodded, heading back to the noodle bar.

It was only after wandering aimlessly around the fair to walk down your food that he said, “So… did I do good?”

“With the date?” you asked and he nodded. “It’s been perfect. I honestly didn’t expect to be dating the moment I arrived in this town…”

“Did you want a break from it, or…?”

“No,” you said. “I just… didn’t look for it.”

Tai was holding your hand as the pair of you moved through the bustling, jostling people, dodging drunken revellers and excited teenagers alike. His skin was rough and cool, and his huge presence beside you in the constant ebb and flow of people was undeniably grounding.

“I guess good things just fall into your lap when you’re not expecting it,” you added.

Tai leaned low towards your ear and growled, “I wouldn’t mind having you in my lap…” and you smacked him in his solid chest, laughing. When he laughed, all his jagged teeth showed, and his eyes rolled back just a little in his head. In an odd kind of way, it was attractive, and you smiled up at him.

At a quieter corner of the fair, he paused and looked down at you. Lowering his head, he murmured, “Damn, I really wish I could kiss, you know?”

“What do samebito do instead?” you asked.

He smiled softly. “Our noses are very sensitive,” he said, and he was going to continue but he cut off suddenly when you brought your fingertips to the tip of his snout and traced a gentle circle there. A shudder ran through him and his eyes rolled back for a moment to show the whites. “Damn,” he panted. “Your touch is…” With gills flaring, he nosed you backwards until your back hit the sides of a wooden shack - the side of one of the trinket stalls perhaps - and he began to nose at your neck again.

A soft rumbling emanated from his chest and his hands wandered. He palmed your cock through your jeans and you moaned, rolling your hips a little into the touch, chasing friction. “Not here,” you gasped and he backed off, glassy eyed and nodding.

“No,” he said. “Not here.” And then he laughed, shaking his head. “Damn, you look good all ruffled like that,” he said, thumbing an arc across your cheekbone where your skin was flushed hot.

Not long after that, you agreed to head home and he offered to walk you. At your door, you thanked him for an amazing evening, and touched him again on his nose, this time with your whole palm, your fingers tracing gentle lines up and down the rough skin there. His eyes rolled again and he growled.

“When can I see you again?” he asked breathlessly. Before you got the chance to answer, he had nuzzled against your neck again, and as you leaned into the contact, he parted his jaws and very gently raked his teeth across your skin. His tongue rasped over your pulse and you gasped. “Sorry,” he added as he drew back. “I didn’t hurt you did I?”

Wordlessly you shook your head.

He grinned. “Good. You got an answer to my question or did I chase it away…?”

With a lopsided grin, you nodded. “I start work this week, but I should have some time in the evenings?”

He growled and stepped back, frustrated. “I work most nights from about six. Would Thursday work though?”

In fact, he surprised you at lunch one day, and you managed to show up early to the club to give him a quick kiss before he began his shift, and so you snatched moments here and there when you could. He also took you out the next weekend for a meal which was amazing, and afterwards he said, “Listen, I know we’ve only been going out a short while, but I wanted to do something nice for you… are you free this weekend?”

You nodded, wary but curious. Tai laughed when he saw the expression on your face. “Don’t panic,” he said, taking your slightly clammy hand in his. “I’m not proposing to you… I promise it’s just something nice…” If sharks could do puppy dog eyes, this one would be the best at it. As it was, he just tilted his head and looked at you straight on, which kind of had a similar effect.

In what had now become an instinctual replacement for a traditional kiss, you brought your nose to his and kissed it, making him shiver as always. He really hadn’t been kidding when he’d said the skin there was sensitive, and somehow it always seemed to make him short-circuit a bit when you touched him there. “Whatever you want to do, I’m game,” you said. “I trust you, and I think you’ve got the measure of me by now…”

Scraping his mind back together again after the pleasure of your touch, he nodded. “Alright. I’ll come get you and we can go from your place.”

Wondering what it was he’d got planned filled more than a couple of your spare minutes that week, for sure.

In fact, you needn’t have worried at all. When he showed up at your door, he immediately nuzzled you and he picked you up this time. He dropped the small insulated bag he had been carrying and rumbled softly. You tilted your head back, allowing him better access to you, and he placed his massive jaw around your throat. It was unconventional as greetings went, but it was a bit more exciting than a kiss on the cheek, and you’d grown to enjoy it.

When he’d drawn back, he rasped, “I can’t believe you let me do that.”

His voice was breathless with wonder, and you laughed. “Told you I trusted you. Where are we going?”

He set you back down on your feet and asked, “You ready to go? It’s not far - maybe a five minute walk?”

You pulled the door closed behind you and stepped out into the night while he picked up his bag again and held out his other hand to you. The air was chilly, it being late October now, but the stars were perfectly clear in the inky sky above and there wasn’t a breath of wind.

“So…” he said. “You remember a while back, when I told you about some drama at the club? We had this super wealthy elven model and she got into a bit of a ‘difficult situation’ with this big guy that wouldn’t leave her alone.” You listened to him, nodded, and welcomed the growling undertone in his voice as he spoke of the incident. “So I hauled this guy off her and did that thing with my teeth…”

“What thing?”

“You know, the sharky thing where I pull my lips back…”

“Show me?” you asked, knowing full well what it was he was talking about. He knew it too, and laughed, obligingly baring his teeth at you while you short-circuited for a moment…

“Anyway, I think the guy shat his pants, and she was super grateful to me. She said that if I ever wanted a favour from her, all I had to do was ask, so…” He held up a pair of keys and jangled them softly. “I called it in… She said I could use her beach-front apartment for the night. She’s away at the moment but the doorman knows we’re coming, and she said we could help ourselves to anything in the wine cooler and make ourselves at home.” He raised the cool-bag he was carrying and added, “I prepped some dinner. So long as we don’t trash anything or burn the place down, it’s ours for the night…”

“No way,” you smiled. “That’s really sweet of her.”

He shrugged. “Yeah, she’s a real sweetheart.”

The apartment turned out to be the penthouse, and it was gorgeous. Sleek, modern, and yet cosy, you stood in the doorway behind him as he stepped inside and just looked around, struck stupid by it. “Wow,” you finally breathed.

“How the other half lives, eh?” he grinned. “Come on, let’s look around.”

You didn’t get very far before Tai’s stomach was growling and he had made his way to the super fancy kitchen to start unloading the bag of food he’d brought. It was the most amazing picnic spread, and while he set about finding bowls and plates, you wandered over to the French windows and stepped outside into the chilly night. The deck was gorgeous, and there was even a small fire pit with a log store pressed up against the wall of the flat. Ducking briefly back inside, you called, “Are there any firelighters around?”

“I told you we can’t burn the place down!” he laughed.

“There’s a fire pit… does that count?”

With a fire going in the cast iron brazier and the food nearly finished, Tai sat back in his sun lounger, careful of his dorsal fin, and smiled. “Is it too early to say I’m in love with you?” he asked in an uncharacteristically shy voice, staring up at the sky.

Something about the way he said it, and about the way he looked at you every time he saw you, made you shake your head. “No,” you murmured. “I don’t think so.”

He reached across the space between your two loungers and took your hand, running his thumb over your knuckles. “Never thought I’d fall like this for a landie…”

“I love the way you say that word,” you snorted. “Makes us sound like Martians…”

“I can use the more formal ‘Landfolk’ if you’d prefer,” he said in a falsely haughty voice.

“No…”

“Come here,” he said. “You’re too far away.”

Stepping carefully over the remnants of the food and drink, you allowed him to tug you down into his lap and you lay back against his chest while he nuzzled idly at your neck and hair.

“You smell so good,” he groaned.

“Sharks have a good sense of smell, don’t you?” you asked.

“You have no idea…”

“Huh…” you said, hoping he couldn’t smell just how turned on you were in that moment. You didn’t want to move just yet.

Tai, however, had other ideas. He shifted and you felt the hard line of his cock beneath your ass, and he nudged his hips slightly upwards and groaned. “I want you,” he said. “But… I… ” And all his brash confidence suddenly seemed to crumble.

“What?” you asked, glancing up at him over your shoulder. He couldn’t blush, but his eyes rolled a bit and he looked away. “You think I don’t want you back? Don’t you remember how I was at the fair? I practically came in my pants like a horny teenager…”

He laughed. His jaw was noticeably slacker now, his eyes gleaming brightly in the low light of the fire. “I’m scared,” he whispered in a voice that made your heart lurch.

“Scared of what?”

“I don’t want to hurt you… We’re not… We’re not known for being gentle lovers…”

“I trust you.”

“That… That doesn’t help…” he said with an awkward chuckle. “I mean, it’s amazing, don’t get me wrong, but… I’m…”

“Let me guess, you’re a biter…” you grinned and he rolled his eyes. “I’m sure we can figure it out… would it help if I stayed on top? We can take it slow this time anyway…”

He gazed at you and then smiled softly, gently nudging his nose into your hand as you raised it to ‘kiss’ him. “I don’t deserve you,” he murmured into your palm, tenderly licking a little stripe over it and then up your fingers.

In little more than a few minutes you were both naked, and you got to see him properly for the first time. The patch of white began under his chin at his jaw and moved down his neck to his chest and stomach, tapering down as if to draw attention to his hardening cock. He was beautiful, and big, his tip already glistening as he watched you watching him. “Fuck,” he cursed, reaching for you. “Look at you…”

You sat back down astride him, your own cock pressed against his as you took him in your hand and rolled your hips. He threw his head back and clutched the arms of the lounger, letting out a deep, earthy growl. His hips lurched upwards as you continued to stroke him slowly, rocking your own body against him until the pair of you were slick and desperate.

His chest began to heave and as you scraped your blunt nails down his pecs and over the ridges of his abs, he opened his jaw and showed all his teeth as he began to pant rapidly.

“Fuck, that’s so good,” he moaned, leaning forwards again and enjoying the sight of you working his cock and your own in your hand at the same time. Pre-come spilled down his length as he twitched and gasped, bucking into the tightness of your grip, and he began to growl again.

“I’m… I’m close,” he said breathlessly. “Fuck, I’m so close already…” His jaws closed with a loud clack and his eyes rolled back to show the whites as he suddenly spilled over his chest and abs, his body rocking and convulsing as he came with a muted bellow.

A few seconds later and you followed him, falling forwards onto his messy chest as white heat thundered through you. He was still twitching and gnashing his powerful jaws together, eyes still rolled back, cock pulsing in your hand.

You watched him as he came down from his peak, and you couldn’t resist rocking your hips once more against his spent and sensitive cock. He grunted and his eyes rolled back to look at you.

Tai swallowed and then croaked, “I haven’t come like that in a long time…”

“Me neither,” you grinned. “You want to see what the bathroom’s like in this place?”

After a few more minutes to catch his breath, he said, “Hold on,” and you gripped him round the waist as he stood up and carried you through the apartment, pausing every now and again to nuzzle at your neck and scrape his teeth lovingly over your shoulder. When you finally made it to the bathroom, it was a while before you actually emerged, eventually clean…

—

I really hope you folks enjoyed this one! Don’t forget to let me know if you did enjoy it by leaving a like and/or reblogging it!

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#samebito #sharkman #exophilia #male monster #mlm #male monster x male reader #male reader insert #commission

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kumoriyami-xiuzhen · 4 years

Text

Hakuoki SSL - Hakuo Gakuen Student General Assembly Track 3

well... i hit 300 followers. not sure if it’s a milestone worth mentioning (if you’re one who followed because of the musicals and hasn’t gotten a message, read what it says at the top of my stuff i have page) or not since i can honestly say that i only started this tumblr for myself and everything i translate was really only done for my own sake... and I really have no idea if that number is good or bad for the amount of time I’ve been posting lol.

Still, i’m going to use the fact that this happened as an excuse to post this since i couldn’t figure out where to stick it in my queue since i didn’t want to wait til september to post this lol.

Anyway, this damn track is 18 min long... and i’ll get to the video next month along with the Hijikata web drama (have to push that back cause i got a bit busy with some things). Please note that the text left in bold is when Amagiri’s conversation with Kazama gets overlapped by Shiranui speaking.

As always, final edits will be done when I get to my subtitle video... need to double check that other video translation and the audio for a few things.

Enjoy~! and do not post elsewhere!

Hakuoki SSL - Hakuo Gakuen Student General Assembly Track 3

Translation by KumoriYami

Hijikata: okay... it's about to start.

Harada: Hijikata-san? you okay? need stomach medicine?

Hijikata: no need... alright, start/begin.

Amagiri: The Hakuo Gakuen Student Assembly will begin now. All students, stand! .....sit down.

Kazama: Then, start with each club's budget report, Amagiri.

Amagiri: Yes. these are the draft budgets for the various clubs/departments.

Kazama: The arts and literature club, the calligraphy club, and the photography club last year all needed 10,000; the music club which won a competition, in any case, needs a budget of 50,000; the newly established broadcasting club/depart of broadcasting to buy equipment, they need an increase of 20,000; the baseball team, soccer team and tennis team will be the same as last year with 50,000; the judo club, archery club, track and field team, and also the kendo club, given their achievements from last year......

What......100,000?! Oi amagiri, what's going on/what's this about?!

Amagiri: About this issue...

Kazama: I haven't approved of any of this!! any club/organization/group associated with Hijikata will not have its budget approved!!

Shiranui: Alright/Well, of the budget report was just read, the clubs that weren't named will will maintain the status quo this year, ok? If there's no problem, the draft proposal will be adopted directly.

(applause)

Kazama: Eh...... continuing on [next], regarding the cultural festival that is to be held in october.......Shiranui.

shiranui: hey, hey. But there's nothing much to say since it will basically be the same as last year.

Kazama: This year like previous years, Hakuo Gakuen will hold its cultural festival......

(Kazama voice's cuts out completely while Hijikata and Harada talk)

Harada: I originally though [he'd] poke a basket [probably blow a gasket], seeing him now though, it seems that things are going smoothly.

Hijikata: For better or worse, that's because he's the student council president. But, what happens next will be the real question[/test]......

Harada: Next...... you mean the matter of changing of school rules and regulations?

Hijikata: I don't know what sort of issues the students will raise, though it's better to keep an eye on them.

(aside ends)

Kazama: Read it out/This reading is finished [check video version. Alt: That will be all on/for that/Conclude with that]. Are there any objections to what was raised? If there are no objections then this proposal/motion will be passed/approved. the next topic of discussion will be pertaining to amending the school rules and regulations.

You should all remember/recall, the questionnaire about amending the school's rules and regulations that I had sent out.

Due to he subject of this questionnaire, we solicited opinions on the revision of school rules.

amagiri: kazama-sama, these are the results of the questionnaire.

Kazama: So many opinions were collected, this shows that everyone is quite diastisfied with the current school rules and regulations. I see I see.....

? ? ?: How about cancelling the classical literature class? As someone living in modern times, I cannot help but wonder if there is any real need to learn classical literature. I think the time for classical literature should be spent on something more meaningful. So I propose that the classical literature class be cancelled. ——Proposed by: Anonymous

Kazama: Hm, hahahahaha.... This suggestion/proposal/motion/draft truly is great! However I believe cancelling the classical literature class isn't enough, rather [we should be] abolishing the classical literature [teaching] position. Hm. This suggestion will be kept to discussed later.

Hijikata: oi!!! You've got to be kidding me!! Classical literature is a required subject for entrance exams! Really, it's already that Kazama is thinking about adopting this proposal, and the one who wrote this sort of proposal is also ridiculous, Souji ! You two, [come] to my office later! [either that or the principal's office.... but im leaning towards 'my' since 我 is in the TL. reword later]

Okita: Wait a moment/sec Hijikata-san, why do you think I wrote that proposal? The questionnaire was anonymous, there's no evidence that says that I wrote that proposal.

Hijikata: Regardless if you try to be anonymous, a proposal for cancelling the classical literature, there's no one aside from you in the entire school who would propose such a thing!

souji: wah, you seem to be really self-confident in that~ However, don't you think that students find Hijikata-san's classical literature class boring, I've seen not a few of them [may be: i don't think anyone i've seen would disagree...? check video later]?

hijikata: you bastard!!!

Harada: Calm down, Hijikata-san! You need to calm down! you should treat this as Souji fooling around.......

Okita: yes yes, I simply wrote down my heartfelt and honest thoughts~ [reword later? check video tl]

Hijikata: Sure enough you were the bastard who proposed this/it!!

Amagiri: Kazama-sama. do you want discuss the motion for cancelling the classical literature class later? I think you should continue with the next proposal. Further discussion on this draft may cause delays.

Kazama: To dare give/Daring to give me advice, you truly are brazen/impudent——I was originally going to be saying that, now you do as you say/that. [check video for last sentence]

Amagiri: I sincerely apologize.

???: Classes are 50 minutes in length, and they're too long! So can they be cut down to 30 minutes? If that happens, then the lunch period can be extended, which would mean more time to eat or even take a nap right? I think that this would absolutely be better!

——Proposed by a hopeful anonymous person [double check audio cuz the text on the video just says 'proposed by: anonymous']

Shiranui: Cutting the amount of time spent in class, that has my support! Kazama, pass this proposal [approve of this]!

harada: oi, oi! Don't you know how bad it would be/about the adverse/negative influence/impact/effect it would have, if you cut down on class time?

Shiranui: Hah? How bad effect it might have?! Shouldn't this be something to celebrate [Not sure but it might instead be: something happy/good to look forward to. check video tl]?

Harada: Hah...... you may think that cutting on class time would mean more time for playing around, but that way of thinking is wrong! Don't you guys know that each semester, exams are regularly scheduled? If class time is reduced, I'm afraid that it might mean being unable to learn everything before taking those exams. If that happens, you'd have to sacrifice your weekend for make up lessons. Is that alright with you?

Shiarnui: If that's the case, it would be better to reduce what the exams cover then!

Harada: In school, there are "learning essentials." If you feel like causing problems, and ignoring the minimal learning requirements, maybe should try being a teacher. If that happens, getting passing post-secondary entrance exams will become a dream. So, Heisuke, this type of draft proposal would be something that we can't approve of.

Heisuke: EH?! Harada-sensei, how do you know that this is something that I wrote?

Harada: Think with your head, who else would have come up with such an idea. To really think that you wouldn't get found out, that sort of thinking is completely incomprehensible.

Heisuke: ergh...........

Kazama: This type of shortsightedness really suits your identities as small fry. If class time is reduced, it'd better to have the classes cancelled altogether. Final exams cannot be considered as something to worry about, if I was writing an exam, I'd be able to get a perfect score even if my eyes were closed.

Amagiri: That skill is something that only Kazama-sama has.

Shiranui: Mah... The outward appearance is [might be] human, but [I/who] don't/doesn't know how many times he's repeated the school year/about the countless times [he's] repeated the school year.

Kazama: Returning to the subject, are there any objections to this proposal? It seems that there aren't, then [we're] moving on to discuss the next proposal.

???: I've heard that many students go play at the rail station/bus stop after school. Although moderate relaxation is harmless, but isn't playing at the game centre and KTV all night, something that goes against the responsibilities that students have? In order to prevent problems from occurring, I think that students should get permission from their teacher for where they go after school beforehand. [^check video tl for this later]

——Proposed by: Saito Hajime.

Kazama: oh.....? The proposals up until were all anonymous, it seems like draft is different. But, to have the teacher give permission approve of where one can go after school, what a stupid idea.

Saito: A stupid....... idea?! If one person disrupts the moral standards/discipline, it will cause a chain reaction. What's so stupid about a proposal to prevent that?!

Kazama: Just think about it for a little bit. Or is your brain too small so you can't [even] figure that out?

Saito: …………

Amagiri: Kazama-sama. Although it may be bold for me to act as your substitute/in your place, but may I be the one to handle this explanation?

Kazama: Approved.

Amagiri: yes!...... saito-dono, your opinion does sound somewhat reasonable. Because the act of playing around after school is not praiseworthy. However, after studying hard in school, it is necessary for suitable entertainment to be used as an outlet for accumulated stress. Just monotonously going to and from school will affect the students ability to think independently. Only by enriching their experiences will their minds be able to grow [more literally this sentence is about experience becomes the soil for minds to grow in... check video tl later].

Saito: But I never said anything about banning after school entertainment/recreation! I only proposed having teachers the approve of what can be done after school!

Amagiri: That will affect the students' ability to think independently. What is referred to as independence, requires individuals who think by themselves and make their own choices [says "to take action"]. I believe, that it would go against human nature, if a teacher was asked about for permission about being able to play in a certain manner [check video tl for this later]. What do you think of this perspective?

Saito: So it was like that. Just as you said. I actually proposed something that opposed Hakuo Gakuen's education policy....... I will accept this conclusion [word I have for this translates to 'reality.' check video tl later], and deeply reflect upon this.

Harada: But even though this has nothing to do with being self-reliant/independent, this sort of regulation is [would be] too harsh/strict.

Kazama: Hrm......is that worthless discussion finally over? Presumably everyone has already become tired of this sort of monotonous talk. Here is some good news. The draft I will be reading now, I will not be accepting any objections and [will be] pass[ing] it right away.

(students mumble in background)

Kazama: Hmph. I understand how you are all worrying about whether or not your proposals will be adopted. Ignorant fools! Get down on your knees/Grovel on your knees before me and pay attention to attention to what I have to say! "My wife must greet me every morning at my home. Although there will be difficulties in the implementation of this regulation, I will compromise in having my her greet me every morning in the student council room.

Hijikata: This terrible proposal, did you really think, that this wouldn't get vetoed! Don't you remember how the same draft was rejected last time!!!

Kazama: That's preposterous...... Didn't you hear me?! I remember saying "the proposal that I will be reading now, I will not be accepting any objections, and [will be] passing it right away."

Hijikata: We don't have even the slightest reason to accept the draft proposed by you! Really, originally I thought that this would be able to proceed smoothly, but I didn't expect for this to happen again. Furthermore, you need to restrain yourself, stop calling/don't call her "my wife!"

Kazama: Hrm~ I have no obligations to listen to your complaints. But....... it truly is a pity for my wife to not be here right not. If she was here, surely, she would be passionately watching me, and blushing shyly while crying tears of joy.

Souji: To be able to misunderstand to this degree, it's shocking to the point of laughter [hilarity?]. The content of this is the exactly the same as last time, and nothing's been changed.

Heisuke: (Fortunately), ["fortunately is included in the text tl but not video tl. check audio later]It seems like that guy caught a cold, which is she isn't here today.

Harada: It's seem that you can also do something smart. Well done, Heisuke!

Heisuke: hehe, right?

Kazama: Che! Too loud! After I've announced the passing the adoption of these proposals, you all/all of you bastards [check audio] should just obediently behave......!

Amagiri: Then, read out the next proposal.

Shiranui! Oh! That looks pretty good. "I hope for winter vacation to be as long as summer vacation, please give us a month of vacation!" Summer vacation is indeed a month long, winter break is only have a month!

Amagiri: To begin with, the length of summer vacation isn't the same across the country. In colder regions with more snow, summer vacation may not be a month. On the contrary, that region's winter vacation may be relatively longer. Summer vacation was originally established for escaping the hot weather.......

Shiranui: I know, I know! I get it already! Stop talking okay?

Amagiri: No. I am not finished speaking....

Kazama: Amagiri, Shiranui! You've got some nerve to be interrupting me while I talk! This is all your fault that we've strayed away from our next topic for discussion!! The next time this happens/If this happens again, I will not spare you! Remember that/keep that in mind!

Saito: I believe that if it wasn't for your pointless proposals, the current topic of discussion wouldn't have been so derailed.

Kazama: Listen to me, no matter the objections against the following/next draft, I will still implement it! Now remember that and listen carefully!

"Female students must report to the Student Council room immediately after the bell rings for lunch. At the time [they] must also bring a hand-made bento..."

Hijikata: Veto!

Kazama: "Female students must go to the Student Council room after..."

Hijikata: Veto!

Kazama: "Female students must..."

Hijikata: Veto!

Kazama: Hijikata, if you haven't listened to everything that I've said, surely you have a reason for it [/how can you have a reason to interrupt me]?!

HIjikata: It’s because you deliberately targeted her by writing so many proposals, bastard. [alt: "because, bastard, you deliberately targeted her..." will check audio for this later]

School rules are not your toys!

Kazama: You don't understand the obvious! As Hakuo Gakuen's student council president, I am obligated to make the school rules and regulations perfect! Therefore, the current school rules must be amended with only this draft!

Souji: Saying/Having said such beautiful/pretty words, isn't he just making excuses for his wilfulness?

Saito: Because there is only one female student in the entire school.

Kazama: Keh! You bastards! Do you guys mean to do everything you can to obstruct the path of love between me and my wife!?

Heisuke: what path of love......

Harada: It goes without saying that she's not your wife! Having said that though, to say spout such nonsense without backing down in front of everyone, that courage is really admirable.

Kazama: How could I possibly give up! My wife and I have been matched by the red thread/string [of fate]! This profound bond, even if the world stands against me, I will never back down!

[While I usually see 'thread' associated with the Chinese version of this belief, I don't know if the Japanese version of it uses 'string' or 'thread'....]

Shirnaui: What red string...... this is clearly just Kazama's own unbelievable delusions and his own wishful thinking.

Amagiri: Shiranui. You cannot say that/That mustn't be said. there's no telling if a miracle will occur. [reword more formally later]

Shiranui: Ah, if the sun rises in the West and the sky rains red, perhaps that might be true.... but, I don't think it's/that's going to work/it isn't anything but hopeless.

Amagiri: Mm............

Kazama: Heh, you've said enough. No matter what you think, the final decision is in my hands. Amagiri, all the drafts that were just read have been approved.

Amagiri: But... isn't that too unreasonable?

Kazama: What's the problem. I am the the student council president. Even if the [my] methods are unreasonable, no one would dare object.

Heisuke: Who'd accept that sort of ridiculous reasoning?!

Souji: That's right, if you think that you'll be forgiven for doing whatever you want as the student council president, then you're gravely mistaken. Eh.... (goes up on stage) I see.... these were the drafts that were read right?

Kazama: What the hell are you doing bastard?

Souji: Of course doing this! (tears all the drafts)

Kazama: ...! You bastard! You two quickly help me stop him!!!

Amagiri: Kazama-sama. I do not think that those drafts are suitable to be adopted.

Shiranui: I also agree/Agreed. Say, I'm very tired can I go home now(/ Anyway I'm tired can I go home now? [2nd one sounds better])

Kazama: Not permitted...!

Hijikata: Anyway! If you continue being a nuisance, we also have our own ways to respond. I don't care about the power you have/ about the powers of the student council president, but I'd advise you to not look down upon us teachers.

Harada: That's right, Kazama. I advise you to retreat while you're still able. If this continues, those so-called rules won't be able to protect you.

Amagiri: Kazama-sama. Listen to Hijikata-sensei and Harada-sensei's advice right now. This commotion/disturbance is getting bigger, and continuing this may cause others to doubt Kazama-sama's ability as student council president.

Kazama:.....Kuh!...! Heheheheheh.... You guys, I'l remember this! The next Student Assembly, I'll show off all my power to show everyone in the world just who my wife belongs to [check video tl]! Look forward to it!

Souji:...This type of behaviour... is this what they call a "defeated dog's barking"? [if it's not this interpretation.... i'm assuming it means something like 'running away in defeat,' or 'having your tail between your legs'or 'turning tail' since this mentions a dog - 负犬远吠 in chinese. or maybe its 'barking dogs seldom bite' that was the only idiom i found that that mentioned dogs and barking that might have been in JP when browsing. either way, i'll go i'll go double check the other version of this that has been translated later].

Saito: Exactly/Absolutely/(indeed/It is). I don't want to become like that person. /I don't want to be that kind of person, even if I walk astray/I don't want to be that kind of person, even if I'm not careful. [check video tl]

End

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well, this is now officially the longest thing I’ve translated... tho that won’t be the case when I get to Shinsengumi Oni-tan. i dragged this one out for a long time since it just looked like a massive wall of text in nimble... haaah thankfully all the other ssl dramas aside from “Another Chizuru?” are >15min... I think?

also no images being posted this time cuz i didn’t schedule this posting.

#hakuoki #hakuouki #hakuoki ssl #hakuoki drama cd #hakuoki drama translation

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