#their friendship already is v important and means a lot to me but even that got shafted

[16-jarrah]

every day i think about what they took from us (willow x luz)

#im sorry but i stand by the fact that toh should have pushed for w/illuz instead of l/umity #like i'm not gonna be too mad about ships involving teens in a cartoon for kids but let's be honest here #the only reason l.umity and winter/h.untlow were the ones they pursued was because of dana's refusal to let go of tropes she loves #willuz is so cute and owns my entire heart and soul #their friendship already is v important and means a lot to me but even that got shafted #anyway. i'm too tired to add more detail to this rant post so i'll leave it at that #op #edit: oh hey look what got posted from my queue

[theheightofdishonor]

I love reading your kagehina posts!! Sometimes I see stuff like they aren't even friends 😭 and probably drifted apart and partner in sports is different from actual friendship lmao

Thank you!

dfghhjkl yeah i've seen those claims and I firmly believe that anyone who's saying any of that needs to take reading comprehension 101. I've talked about this claim a little bit here but to reiterate, kageyama and hinata's bond- their unique connection, the meaningfulness of it, the way that they support and teach and learn from each other- is one of the core aspects of the series. Like, there were so many instances of people commenting about how special their relationship was that I made a list. This post here I think are also relevant to addressing this. (if you couldn't tell, i talk about this a lot lol. But I don't mind talking about it some more)

Point is, they mean a lot to each other. And yes, haikyuu does make a point of showing how volleyball isn't always a 1 v 1 comparison to irl and how volleyball doesn't have to mean everything to be meaningful but at the same time, that's inapplicable to hinata and kageyama because the other side of that coin is that sometimes, volleyball is everything. It could not possibly be more in your face that Kageyama and Hinata formed an instantaneous connection and became a duo to be feared like overnight because they recognized that the other person is exactly like them- someone who will give everything for volleyball, who will never give up, a person who complements them. and understands them. Kageyama's little backstory moment that changed everything (and fucked me up permanently) is that he's been waiting for (someone like) Hinata his entire life. So what if they're not be hanging out 24/7 outside of volleyball? (which they do hang out outside of matches btw later on in life, kageyama asked hinata to play beach vb with kunimi and kindaichi) They already have a mutual understanding about the importance of volleyball in their lives. Also like, even in the last chapter/panel of haikyuu literally just reiterates that for the two of them, volleyball and each other and intrinsically intertwined elements and that they intend on revolving around each other as partner/rivals for the rest of their lives.

If we're looking only at the anime, that list i linked above is entirely taken from season. Like, the the sheer weight of kageyama "i can spike, toss, etc by myself" tobio saying the words "as long as you're with me, you're invincible" like 1-2 episodes later?? This bullshit where kageyama extracts a promise from hinata to follow him to the top of the world still happens in the anime too. That bit in the first Seijoh match where Kageyama says that Oikawa's going to set to Iwaizumi, not because it's the most logical move but because he trusts him so innately that it's the most natural move to make and then going on to make the exact same set to Hinata in the same match?? The extra animated linger on Kageyama and Hinata's fingers touching as they stop the Miya's quick? Oikawa and Atsumu both saying that Kageyama's "wrapped around Hinata's finger"?

Like come on now, does this look like two people who are going to drift apart? Be for real. They're too obsessed with each other to do that.

#asks #haikyu #brotp: someone even better #i looked through my blog for this and realized that i talk about hq a lot #i didn't even get to the post i was looking for because i got too annoyed by how long it was taking #kagehina #haikyuu!! #anyways morons that think these two idiots are going to drift apart are a whole different species that i don't understand #like even if you're too dumb to figure out hq's themes like #when have they ever acted anything less than totally obsessed with each other #vol 1 /season 1 literally hits you over the head like its soo painfully obvious that they're fated soulmates or whatever #even without like kageyama taking literal offense to people not being enchanted by hinata or how his best move favorite move the one time h #s not flawless his most readable move is #that in a pinch he sets to hinata #and its a set that transcends faith #or trust #anyway i love getting asks i def love getting hq asks #thank you anon! #oh extra little addition: during their promise when kageyama asks will you stand on the same stage as me in the future #because he wants hinata at his side!! #for the longrun!! #they make me want to chew concrete

[kingfisherprince]

you bet I'm sending you a ⭐ for the fanfic asks :-)

well, i hope you don't mind me using this as an excuse to continue talking about the second fic in the series. once again horribly long, once again under the cut, once again i am talking too much.

i. intro

this one originally began life as 'blood stains when you fall' but that was… slightly too melodramatic, and didn’t really fit. but i had no clue what other kind of stains you could incur from hardcourts. eventually i decided, okay, the paint isn’t totally dry, you can get blue stains. great, top-notch reasoning there.

from the start, there’s something different - it’s novak’s pov. and this is for a number of reasons. hardcourts, of course, are his territory, and based on the original plan of big 3 surfaces plus side fedal, he would be next. but more than that, i am an absolute sucker for pov outsider fics, so. this was inevitable.

ii. Afterwards, he watches Rafa drop to the ground, exhausted, maybe-grinning, maybe-crying, damp hair falling into his face; when he gets to his feet Novak pulls him in for a hug, and doesn’t let go until he has to.

this was a really difficult line for me, believe it or not. and that’s because for the longest time, i didn’t think i was going to carry over the “afterwards” from pt 1. i thought i would come up with a new passage of time motif and weave that throughout this story, but that was really, really difficult. when i gave up and chose to use this again, it kickstarted my progress on the fic.

this starts at uso ‘10, which is an interesting place because i mean. we all know about novak’s 2011 season, but right before that, he’s still reasonably friendly with rafa. and that’s the angle we’re coming at this whole thing from - a deteriorating friendship alongside a relationship that needs fixing.

iii. Novak doesn’t really believe in the idea of next time. 

once again, something i didn’t expect to become important - or at least, not in the way that it did. i wrote this line intending to set up strongly for the ideas of “next times” and certainty, and i did that - but it also set up an even stronger theme, which is “belief.”

iv. It’s something like certainty. 

this is maybe the only true character study out of the fics in this series; it really focuses on novak’s outlook and the way that changes throughout the 2011 season as he wins, and keeps on winning. because he did, at some point, doubt himself here, and then he won this slam and it only went uphill.

so what kind of effect does that have on this character, a guy who doesn’t really believe in guarantees or tomorrows? how does that change him, how does he stay the same? these are just very interesting questions, and i didn’t know i was answering them until far later in this fic.

v. Here is a lie, and one most people think is true…[]

i added the reprise of “here is a lie” about… i’d say halfway through the writing of this fic. i was toying around with the idea, but having already carried over the “afterwards” motif, i didn’t know about this one. then i tested it out here and it just fit perfectly.

this section is an absolute ball of contradictions, which is probably fair, because novak is nothing if not contradictory. belief really solidified as a major theme around this point, so we have a guy who believes in everything and nothing, who is really struggling to know what to believe when his past tells him one thing, and his success tells him another.

even though i pulled the same structure of truths and lies here, they ended up saying something much different than in the first fic. whereas in that one it mattered what was true and what wasn’t, here it’s just a framing device for something that matters more: what you believe to be true or not.

vi. Afterwards, something settles in his chest; it feels a lot like certainty.

and then certainty comes back, the idea that as he keeps winning more, he gets more sure of his place in tennis. even though this is outsider pov of fedal's Sad Era, a lot of how it starts is novak's attention being split between that and his own life, because it's 2011 and everything is changing. 

at this point i feel like i could talk for a few million years about the first half of this fic, the pure introspection part, and never get to the second bit, which is the one with fedal.

vii. It’s unbelievable.

belief, again. i don't think i quite realized how repetitive some of these elements are until i did this commentary. the repetition makes it stronger, of course, ties it together more closely, but there was more variation on the anaphora in pt 1 for sure. that's probably a huge part of the reason i don't like this one as much.

but this line does have significance; until now, it's been all about how success leads to belief, but at the same time so much success almost defies belief, rises you up so high that all you know to do is fall into it, but someone like this novak - wary, wire-edged - stays on the edges of that belief instead.

viii. Here is the truth one more time: Novak Djokovic believes in everything, some days - but even on those days, he has never believed in such a thing as forever.

okay, this is it! i swear, this is the last thing before we actually talk about the interesting parts of this fic. the truth refrain comes back, but as is the case through most of this second part, it doesn't give us much of an answer.

this line in particular is my attempt at reckoning with novak as we know him, his contradictions and oddities and beliefs and disbeliefs and the fact that, despite everything, he is still my favourite player. it is, in many ways, a self-justification.

ix. Rafa has the same look in his eyes that he’d had for all of two years ago, half-wrecked with pain and near heartbreak, and back then he’d refused to say a word about it, and Novak had thought it was just his knees, but he’s starting to think maybe it was something else too, even back then.

alternatively: the paragraph where novak gets a Clue. he can be… very dense, which is why he didn't figure this out at any point in the preceding four years, and also gets easily caught up in his own life, which is why the fic takes such a long span of time. 

but at the end of the day, he really does care because he just wants everyone to go back to being happy. it's a contradictory sort of motivation, but he's a contradictory sort of person. something like that; i don't think i explained this very well.

x. Love, maybe, and people. And tennis, always.

this is where, after far too long, the belief motif gets broken down. a lot of things change, but these are the things that haven't changed in an entire lifetime, and never will. that's what you can really, truly believe in, always, and it won't let you down. 

as soon as i wrote this, i began to work off this as the fundamental essence of the belief motif, and changed it as needed in the sections i pulled it into.

xi.  it doesn’t even matter that Rafa won’t look him in the eye because he’s done it, he’s won Wimbledon. 

in between the themes of belief and actually reaching your dreams and the complexities of love and people being people, it’s important to remember this: a friendship, falling apart.

it makes me sad, it really does. there's almost an air of unrequited love to it. i didn't love writing this aspect of the fic because of that, but, well. it needed to be done, y'know?

xii. "Fuck you," is Roger's first response…[]

so finally, a literal year after he first notices that something is off, novak finds out. this seems sort of contrary to the way i wrote him - do everything now, because you don't know if you'll get any kind of tomorrow - but really, it just means this was pretty low on his priority list. now he's won just about everything, so he has time to ask.

this also highlights the difference in the way roger and rafa reacted after the mess that was the first fic ending. rafa got sad, and then got injured, and then got sadder. roger got sad, and then he got angry, and he stays angry through the time of this conversation. 

xiii. Afterwards, Novak thinks if he doesn't find out now, he might never get the chance.

didn't i just say he doesn't feel the "no tomorrows” pressure when it comes to talking about this? so why is this line there? there wouldn't be any reason for him to worry about this normally. but he's just beaten rafa for the nth time in a row, and remember: a friendship, fraying, almost worn away completely by this point. if he doesn't find out now, he might not have enough of it left to try again.

xiv. “So,” he says as they walk into the locker room…[]

my favourite scene in the entire fic, and maybe the entire series, is also the first one i wrote. i was having a tricky time with writer's block, but i forced myself to start this conversation, and then i just kept going. 

one of the most difficult things about the anaphora and motif-heavy style that this is written in is that i have no space for my sense of humour. so i pretty much poured the entire thing into this scene, and i love how it turned out. the best one-liner is definitely the "love advice at 40-15.” i'm also pretty fond of the line that got used as the fic summary. 

special thanks to @boockaroo for giving me dozens of spanish insults to choose from. i was originally going to just use one, but then they were so good that i added a couple more.

xv. The thing about sadness is this…[]

it's easy to say: rafa is sad. he's been sad since before the beginning of this fic, and continues to be sad part way through the next one. and, because he's not built for this kind of sadness, that becomes really obvious.

i'm more interested in this, though: who are the people that are built for sadness? i implied an answer, but i want to know what y'all think. that's really what this section is about.

xvi. Do not meddle in the affairs of your rivals wizards, for they are not at all subtle and none of your business quick to anger.

was this me panicking upon realising i didn't have strikethrough text for this fic, and adding one at the last possible minute? oh, absolutely. do i still like this line? yes, because it's lord of the rings.

xvii. final scene

unique among the final scenes because of two things: it's over a phone, and it doesn't take place on the court. although it does take place before a hardcourt tournament final (miami 2012, which novak and andy played in reality. it was more convenient for me this way.)

this is a lot more typical of my writing style, this kind of character interaction, banter, nonsense, people solving problems by talking to each other. that's why all the final scenes are conversations. that, and i like to think i have a good handle on voices, which lets me give weight to the dialogue without it feeling ooc.

as one relationship is getting counseling - roger and rafa's, courtesy novak - the other one, rafole's friendship, finally finishes falling apart. i don't think i intended for the perpendicular storylines to be there when i started out, but it heightens both themes.

i brought back most of the most important lines as parentheses in this one, even if i hadn't previously established them as motifs. that change in method is something i took through into pt 3.

xviii. Afterwards…[]

there are a couple of really important "afterwards" in this section, which is why i highlighted the entire section, and not just one part. first, there's the one where rafa says he's going to try - he looks in pain, because this is the point when his knees are starting to flare up, but he's also happy. it's a juxtaposition of pain, which happens a lot more in pt 3.

the other important one is the very last line. it completes what i think is the binding thread of the fic, which is an outside view of a relationship, and a friendship falling apart. by saying novak "thinks they'll figure it out" he's removing himself from the equation of rafa&roger, and accepting the end of a friendship. 

this is the end of his viewpoint, and of his involvement in the story. at the same time, by separating him from the other two, it does justice to the fact that this is also very much his fic.

xix. random stuff

this fic defied all my best attempts at finding music, so i will just say that its soundtrack is silence. but if you listen to anything with this, make it "don't" by eAeon.

xx. final thoughts

this part was. a lot.

it took the longest time, because writer's block hit me hard through all parts of it. it's my least favourite, because of how repetitive it seems at times, without ever reaching poetic prose. it was the one i was most uncertain about, because novak is… controversial at best. 

i thought a lot about not posting it, just keeping the series to two parts. i thought, even after i finished it, about deleting the whole thing. it felt self-indulgent and unnecessary.

but now it is what it is. i probably won't look back at this one as much as i will the others, but i'm proud. not really of it, but of myself, for overcoming all of that and still writing, in my eyes, a decent fic.

so, yeah. that was blue stains.

#fisherkings fic #tennis rpf #fedal #and a lot of #novak djokovic #the right questions #series: stained in your colours #fic: blue stains when you fall

[jettorii]

So I took a break from the series to go watch the Ninjago movie.

__ In Case Ur Avoiding Spoilers for This___

Wow they changed a LOT of stuff. …I probably should’ve watched this before the first two seasons ngl: might’ve made me appreciate it a bit more lol. (Zane being reduced to robot jokes and Garmadon not caring for his son anymore bothered me the most — though the latter is a tad more forgivable because it’s so important to the plot and also Lloyd firing every missile he has at him was the best joke in the film.) (Also Cole being a DJ was actually pretty fun.) It was a lot more mean-spirited than I thought it would be, too: like, Lloyd just gets BEAT DOWN at every opportunity. I thought the overexaggeration was actually really funny most of the time but I kinda wish the ninjas were better friends to contrast against that a little bit. The volcano bit was very funny.

The main thought that I was having in the film, though — kinda to assuage my irritation towards the changes in personality that I didn’t like — was that this was specifically LLOYD’S PERSPECTIVE of events.

The bullying wasn’t actually so extremely universal that the cheerleaders got their BOO LLOYD cheer on The Radio, but it’s overexaggerated because that’s what it FELT like to Lloyd.

The ninjas are this one-note because it is specifically how Lloyd sees them, or even how he imagines them to himself. Maybe he even makes fun of them in his head by depicting them like this just to make himself laugh: a concept that is actually EXTREMELY sweet if you take into account that this means they are the big thing in his everyday life that gets a giggle out of him :)

(Bit of a stretch but since I like Lloyd being younger than them: the ninjas aren’t even actually his classmates. Maybe Sensei Wu or even the school itself made them as teachers (SPOILERS FOR S3: like they were in the first five seconds of S3) keep an eye on him just to make sure he had someone in his corner. Or maybe they’re not even IN school but having them there is a way for the film to represent how they’re always there for him :))

Garmadon actually did call him to wish him a happy birthday, but completely fucked it up to the point where it felt more like what we saw in the film. (In fact, Garmadon in general cares MUCH more for his son, more like show!Garmadon, but Lloyd is so extremely pissed off at him that this whole depiction of him just being the Worst Father Ever is him venting his personal frustrations at their whole situation.)

Garmadon refusing to talk about his son was legit just him being Smart in a fight and not letting the Ninjas have something so precious to use against him. Lloyd took it very, VERY differently.

The other ninjas being so angry at him for bringing a cat into things was transformed into his own sense of guilt over everything, while in reality they were probably a lot more sympathetic.

The First Generals firing him as well as and Garmadon into a volcano wasn’t just them tossing “Some Random Kid” into a volcano to be Evil, but specifically them tossing Garmadon and his Son into the volcano because Garmadon would Not Shut Up about his son and this was the best way to get back at him. (Would explain why they didn’t take the other Ninjas.)

The ninjas saying “we should be better friends” is just Lloyd venting his frustrations again lol — maybe they really did have a fight about the Cat, even if it didn’t go as Horribly Mean Spirited as he felt it did.

All the Wilhelm Screams and Super Cool Edits around the Ultimate Weapon are legit just Lloyd being a kid, which I’m pretty sure was already a thing.

BOO I FINALLY WATCHED THE NINJAGO MOVIE SO I CAN FINALLY REPLY TO THIS >:]]]

spoilers under the cut!!!

forst of all i completely agree w your thoughts at the beginning!!! really sad that zane was just. kind of toned down to haha funny robot guy instead of gorgeous thoughtful handsome smart beautiful anyways

and!!!! was v sad to not see their friendship much portrayed :[ wouldve genuinely loved to see more interactions with one another instead of that tiny little bit at the beginning at the school

AS FOR YOUR BULLET POINTS!!! THEYRE SO REAL I AM TAKING THEM FOR CANON PLEASE THE ONE ABOUT THE NINJA ACTUALLY BEING TEACHERS TO WATCH OVER HIM IS GJUST UAGHHH theyre so silly i love them

the garmadon call thing too???? of him actually calling to wish him happy birthday but instead fucking it up im going to sob PLEASE

i feel like this lloyds perspective of the movie actually makes me feel. so warm i love this sm omfg thank you for sharing i will be thinking about this >:]

#jettbox #ninja sillies

[that-was-anticlimactic]

hello corey :] i am very interested to see what you wrote for the response so you can answer this w it if you'd like!!

hi olly and @gayfertilitygoddess and @matcherry and @thefirstanomally :) thank you sm for indulging me i was v proud of this and have many feelings!!! also again, lowkey say some things bout s.t but it's more at the writers than the actual show because i have. Feelings. about the s.t writers lol okay so anyways- wait also i said that it makes me come out feeling heavy and :/// just because so much of media these days is so heavy and it’s just one of those shows that makes me anxious, but that’s also just me and my opinion and i realize that not everyone thinks that!

Respond: Add one characteristic to the list. Add one generalization to the list.

I guess, I kind of want to start this section by saying that I think that there is so much worth and importance in reading or watching things made for children - and yes I am going to include watching in there because children's television is, in my opinion, so much like children's literature. A characteristic that I would say applies to children's lit is that it's safe. And there are a lot of things that I could mean when I say that, but it was the first way to describe what I'm feeling that popped into my head. Something that is so important about children's lit and media in these days and ages is that it's *usually* not playing into this... horrific set up or model that almost anything "enjoyable" is expected to follow these days. What do I mean by that? Well, I'm going to talk about My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic because 1. there's worth to and meaning in that and 2. I honestly count and consider mlp as children's lit. If you look at the media that is produced nowadays, there is so much freaking emphasis on romance or sex or drugs or just violence violence violence. And this isn't me saying "oh, sex bad something something must look down upon those things". Like, I do think that watching people have sex on screen or reading about it is inappropriate for children specifically, but that's besides the point. None of those things are inherently bad in what we read and watch, but when it becomes the norm (like it is) and everything is expected to be this constant strain of all this negativity and violence and heavy topics... the world is already so heavy - too heavy - and the more we force this into what we consume, the worse we all get and the more our mindset gets skewed.

The thing about children's lit and media is that it doesn't include those things, and we've been so desensitized to and forced to love those things that we see something that strays from this formula and we instantly think it's bad. Childish. Not worth our time. In believing this, people are missing out. Children are so easily shaped and young and they will believe what they see or hear. That's the thing about mlp and one of the things that makes it so incredible to me - it isn't forcing romantic expectations onto anyone, it isn't about violence... it actually teaches children while still being enjoyable, age appropriate, and something for all ages. My parents got divorced my junior year of high school, and that was probably the worst year of my life - I was miserable, I was depressed beyond belief, I was trying so hard to fix everything while making sure my younger sister (who was spiraling in all the ways that I wasn't) was okay... and one of the only things that got me through it, that made me see more clearly, was mlp. Season eight episode six: Surf and / or Turf. The message being:

“But you're more than just where you're from or who you live with. We love you because you're you, no matter where you choose to be. Something we forgot to add that both places have – family and friends who love you.”

And no one had ever told me that before. That episode was a metaphor for divorce - and even better, they released an episode about divorce once more in season nine (though they tackled a different aspect of divorce). mlp has talked about death (Tanks for the Memories), racism / segregation (School Raze pt 1 & 2), and so many other things that almost no "adult" show could tackle without making it heavy and hopeless and just... make you walk away feeling depressed and like you hate yourself. Because that's the thing: children's lit and media doesn't do that! And if it does, then it may not be in the right genre. Now, I'm not saying that all media for children needs to teach them about friendship (even though mlp does do that in a truly incredible way that has changed my life and my viewpoints and who I am as a person since 2013), but it is safe for kids. It doesn't make them feeling the crushing weight of the world is terrible I'm a bad person ahhhhhh. And they can still talk about hard topics, even without the lenses of colorful ponies. Because children's books and media can be about Jackie Robinson and about the Holocaust and about the mistreatment of [any marginalized population], and they do it with tact and with age appropriateness and while giving you hope without sugar coating things. They teach you without you realizing it (whether it's blatant "Dear Princess Celestia, today I learned..." or subtle "If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of anypony else") because they stick with you. It's so hard to find things these days that don't depress you and press down harder and harder on the unbearable weight that's already on our shoulders... but, actually, it isn't. Everyone just refuses to see it because it's made for children. As in... age appropriate for children. People see the title "My Little Pony" and dismiss it and tell me that it's childish and stupid solely because they heard the title and decided only five year old girls should watch something with a title like that. It's ignorance, and we as a society are trained to be ignorant because those in power want to profit off of it.

People watch Stranger Things because they like the actors or because it's "adult" and because it has that formula that we've been trained to consider "good", and as the first article suggests, there is no good, it's what we choose, like, or are manipulated into believing. We're supposed to think that Stranger Things is good because it's "for older people" and because "the actors are cool" and the premise is cool, so we ignore this forced emphasis on romantic relationships and the unbearable heaviness that makes us come out feeling worse. We don't even realize that the people creating it just want money, because if they didn't, they wouldn't keep killing off [redacted, sorry don't wanna accidentally spoil lol] or they wouldn't keep dragging the show out and making two hour long episodes. And I don't say this just because I don't really like the show, I say this because I see this formula in almost any life action show or "adult" show or "adult" book that's popular. And that's why they're popular. There's nothing wrong with liking them, but they always don't treat us with love the way that children's books and shows do because they care more about popularity, appeasing fans (which mlp did not or they would've never made the icon that is Fame and Misfortune), or how much money they can make regardless of whether or not they still care about the show they created. Hm. This is kind of long. Like, I don't regret what I said, and I may have come across kind of mean when I mentioned Stranger Things, but it was simply the first popular show that I thought of as my mind raced and I typed this. I promise I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad for liking that show, it's just also not my kind of show and I am willing to admit that bias. I could've said that about so many shows, this was just the first that came to mind. What I'm saying is that there's nothing wrong with liking things that aren't inherently childish in any sense, but there is a beauty and good in watching something younger than us and seeing its worth and seeing it as more than something for kids or "too young for your age". We can learn a lot and we can do so without the senseless or excessive violence (and this isn't me saying that violence is inherently bad and senseless in books or media, it just gets that way once the creators stop caring) or the painfully forced romantic relationships. And that's why I call it safe. Maybe even the word passionate fits here because that's what I tend to see (again, just in my experience with children's books and media). Maybe that doesn't make sense, but it does to me and it feels right to me. This may be an anticlimactic end to an incredibly passionate 1.4k words of excessive answer, but as for generalizations, I'm sure I got that somewhere in there. I could also add something here about a generalization being that picture books and cartoons get a worse rep in the field of "children's media is bad lol" because apparently being drawn or animated makes something inherently bad? But that will make this even longer and I am so sorry Dr. J & co. this is so long I just have feelings😭

#olly tag #thank you #this was v kind of you #i'm have feelings and i feel like no one will read or respond to mine because it is SO long which like i don't blame them haha #i have many Feelings. #i hope this is at least Semi enjoyable uhygtfgyhui #corey rambles:)

[fyeah-bangtan7]

Jimin: “I want to be better, and cooler”

Jimin is a born idol. Whatever he does looks cool and every word he says to his fans is affectionate. And, believe it or not, he means every word of it.

How does it feel to have made a three-disc album? Jimin: At first, my most frequently occurring thought was, “We sure have done a lot.” It gave me a little time to reflect, too, and that idea that the best is yet to come is also what “Yet To Come” is about. And in the same way, I want to do lots of even better things in the future, too.

You could say this album is like a breather, couldn’t you? Jimin: I think it’s important to take a breather like this. I think now’s the time to step back and clear our heads to think about the direction we want to take as a group going forward, and we need time to think about what it is we’ve done as a group.

Is this in any way the result of the pandemic coming to an end? Like, We’ve come so far. Jimin: I think that was part of it. I think, for me, I can feel it better when I’m working now, as opposed to while looking back, so I’m going to try to take on a lot of new things. That’s why I’m meeting with different producers: I feel like I should take this challenge on, the proper way.

After you released “With You,” you went on V LIVE and said, “Starting with this, I'm going to try many things.” Are you currently working on new material? Jimin: I’m just starting. I decided to just keep going straight through, staying together with the producers. I think we’ll basically always be together for around a month. We met a few times and were talking about what messages and what kind of appearance or image I want to get across.

It sounds like you still have more you want to show, even after the Grammys and the concert. Jimin: Exactly. Maybe I can be just a little more explicit.

What do you mean, “more explicit”? Jimin: I just think I can show something a little more raw about me. That might include a more mature side, too, but what I’m really interested in is showing something closer to my real, personal rawness directly in a format like music or music videos. By doing so, I think maybe I can show something I never have before.

What do you mean by “raw,” exactly? Jimin: Like, something that shows the things I usually think about a little more honestly? My thoughts are already well-represented on BTS’ albums, but, you know, some of the older members have already dealt with some darker material  on their solo mixtapes. I think I’m trying to do something similar.

Are there any topics you want to explore? Jimin: I’m doing this more for my own sake than because I want to say something to other people. Because after a year and a half of the pandemic, I was thinking a lot about how I was a little lost. Once the other members found out about that, they said, “Why don’t you try to make it into music?” And that made me decide I should try and talk about it in my music.

I guess it took a little time before you realized you were lost. Jimin: Yes, I think so. I thought I had a wonderful life before, but the more I thought about it, the more I felt like maybe I was trying to deny something.

You mean, not being able to have an audience? Jimin: That’s part of it, but I also started to question things and yet tried to brush those things off at the same time—denying them by telling myself I was just enjoying my life.

It sounds like you were at a point where you wanted to avoid personal concerns or the whole pandemic situation. Jimin: It seems that way. It was like, Now that I think about it …. I think I figured that at least I couldn’t be shaken because I had the reassurance of BTS. But I was suddenly struck by a thought: Would I really be okay if it were me personally, not the group, that was on display? I think I finally recognized that.

You released “With You” with HA SUNG WOON. Was it a conscious decision to collaborate with someone with whom you have a well-known friendship? Jimin: Yes. He was the first friend I made when I moved to Seoul. He’s the first non-school friend I ever made if you don’t include the other BTS members. We used to say, “Someday, when we both make it big, it would be something special if we made a song together and sent it out into the world.” That was the meaning behind it: something I wanted to do someday.

I guess you could say it all started from a promise made long ago. Jimin: Right. We’d been talking about that for seven years, practically. We would show each other our songs or anything else we worked on whenever we made something. We kept that up and said, “Let’s try making some music together,” and then we really did. It was fun.

Did that have any influence on the tone of voice you chose to go with? You tried singing in a completely different voice than usual. Jimin: You’re right. It gave me a lot of practice because it was really hard right from the beginning, so I had to redo it over and over. I kept saying, “I’ll try that again from the top,” and changing a bunch of stuff, but it was a lot of practice, and it was a song for a soundtrack, so I tried really, really hard to give it a simpler sound than anything I usually did before.

It’s closer to your speaking voice than your singing voice. It seems like you must have tried a lot of different things in detail while recording, looking at the way your voice overlaps with SUNG WOON’s in the chorus or how the emotion in the melody is reminiscent of the first self-written song you ever released, “Promise,” even though you didn’t write any of the music this time. Jimin: We tried so many different things. We called each other all the time, and I’m really grateful for the producer who worked with us because I was actually all finished recording, and I kept saying I wanted to try it again from the beginning when we were all finished recording, and I would say, “I’ll try it one more time,” and I could tell that was a lot of hard work for them. It made me feel a lot of different things and it was an important learning experience. I think there were many moments that made me feel that way while we were working on it.

I heard that making “Promise” allowed you to get out of the funk you were in at the time. Would you say that “With You” was a way for you to try and find the emotions that you wanted to express? Jimin: I took an MBTI test recently and it said I’m extroverted, but when I made “Promise” I was really introverted and feeling depressed. I think “Promise” was a chance for me to look at myself. I managed to come out of my shell a little thanks to that song. The first version of “With You” we recorded was very emotional and there was a long process involved in relieving that emotion. “I’ll soften up a bit. … I’ll try it a little softer. … Ah, right—a little bit softer now. … I’ll just try it nice and simple.” Like that. I wanted to show sadness and a desperate longing expressed in a simple style.

It seems like you felt a lot of different emotions while singing that song. Jimin: I used to get really emotional when it came to relationships with others and the words they say, but I’m not really like that anymore. So lately I have moments where I feel like, How was it that I used to feel, again?

Two years ago, in an interview with Weverse Magazine, you called yourself someone who likes to be loved, but it seems like maybe you don’t feel that way as much anymore. Jimin: It’s not quite an emptiness, but I feel like it’s close to that. It’s not like, Well, what else is there? But I think I’m feeling something similar to it.

And then you might have a problem of finding what to fill it with. Jimin: Exactly. I actually struggle and feel restless if I’m not doing anything. And think, Wow, I’m just passing the whole day like this? And it’s been close to a year since I started to feel less like that. But now it’s like, What have I been doing this whole time? Why was I like that?

​Maybe you didn’t make Proof to provide yourself with any answers for that; maybe you just needed some time to reflect on the past. Jimin: I didn’t really think about it like that while working on the album, but it eventually turned out that I really needed that time. I think everyone—us members and the label—had to look back so we could move forward.

The lyrics to “Run BTS” start by talking about life before the debut, and you really got into the rock and roll mood with your vocals on the song. How do you feel revisiting the way you used to run around all the time working so hard? Jimin: I think in those days I was sort of desperate. (laughs) Saying, Wait till you see what I can do next. I can see it in my old videos, too.

That “wait till you see what I can do next” sense comes across particularly well in “Tony Montana (with Jimin).” How did you end up doing that song? Jimin: SUGA and I said, “Let’s do something together,” and that was the result. I think I wanted to sound cool. (laughs) I guess I really wanted to stand out when we made that. “I’m good at this, too!” (laughs)

In “Tony Montana,” you sing, “You used to curse me, I’m major / I’m an idol by nature.” If your natural state back then was being an idol, what about now? Jimin: I’m still an idol. Idol is an accurate description. The word “idol” means something different to everyone, plus I think Koreans see it in an entirely different way, but anyway, you’re right to say that’s where I started. To be honest, I can do the things I do individually, even now, because of being in BTS, and I don’t think that’s going to change since I got my start as an idol.

What do you want to do for ARMY as an idol? You’re expressing your feelings in “For Youth” off Proof when you sing, “Will you give me your hand? I’ll get up over and over.” Jimin: Just being cooler—with good songs, good music videos and good performances. I think that’s the best way to stay faithful to my calling and the way I can pay them back the most. I felt sort of guilty the past two years. After that first day of the LA concert, I felt like I had been wronging the fans this whole time somehow since our concerts kept getting canceled. I felt like maybe they started to lose their passion during all that time since they couldn’t see us, but they had been waiting unconditionally, so I really started to ask myself what I had been doing that whole time. We sang “Permission to Dance” and greeted ARMY at the concert but it was weird how emotional it felt despite the song being so upbeat.

You’re still an idol and still have those feelings, but at the same time you’ve become well-respected among many artists. Jimin: I’m really grateful for everything ARMY says, but not entirely satisfied with myself yet. Nothing would make me happier than having this much self-satisfaction, but I don’t, and I struggle with that. I guess that’s why, even though I really want to be better, I was avoiding the fact that to change in that way I would have to be more consistent in what I do—but I forced myself to bury those thoughts by telling myself maybe I was already good enough. But now, I want to be even better. I want to be better, and cooler. I changed.

You must have had a lot of thoughts like that coming to you when you were singing “Yet To Come.” Jimin: So now I’m looking forward to it. I’m looking forward to knowing who I’ll become and how much better I’m going to be able to perform.

What would your ideal performance look like? I felt like it was a little more clear what the audience wanted to see from you recently when you performed “Black Swan” in LA, Seoul and in Las Vegas. Jimin: I want to show off everything I’m capable of at the highest possible proficiency. For example, whether I’m showing that dark but sexy vibe that only “Black Swan” has, the high energy of “IDOL” or “FIRE,” or how cute I can be, I want to do it all with the highest proficiency. I always look forward to the audience erupting into cheers whenever all my proficiencies come together. I think that’s one of the reasons I used to criticize myself so much whenever I made a mistake or did something wrong.

Are you saying you’re not quite there yet? Jimin: Oh, not even close. It’s still a long way away, and I’m changing now, too. So we keep trading ideas because of the uncertainty we’re currently facing. After doing choreography with exact precision all that time, we moved to a phase where we have a little more freedom to be a little more relaxed or try to involve the audience a bit more. But I think we need to do more songs and be more open to the kinds of direction or sets we should be doing since we don’t have too many songs where we can show off that new side of us.

That’s what I thought when I saw your performance of “Butter” at the Grammys. It felt like you had reached peak proficiency with a performance planned out perfectly from beginning to end. If you could put on this kind of important performance despite all the trouble surrounding it, surely at this point you could ascend to the next level. Jimin: I’m absolutely stoked for it now. What are we going to be like when we’re even better—when we can make each and every move look its best? What’s the future going to look like when we’re even more experienced? So it’s not really a problem that we didn’t win any awards at the Grammys. It would have been nice to win one, but that’s because it would have been like a gigantic gift for ARMY if we did. I just wanted to show them how cool our group is up on stage, so I was just happy we were able to put on that performance. I actually wanted to do “ON,” too. I just wanted to put on an incredibly high-energy performance to tell people, like, “That’s how we do it!” And just come back. (laughs) But we put on a pretty good performance considering how rushed it was, and the fans liked it, and I was like, We did it! I guess you could say I felt relieved.

With regards to your newly changed self, producing “Friends” must have been a different kind of opportunity for you. The song was also on the soundtrack for Eternals. Did you see the movie? Jimin: Yes, I saw it in theaters. (laughs) It was amazing and I felt grateful, but I also wish I could have made an even better song.

How did you get started working on that song? Jimin: I made it from scratch, actually. I was just in the practice studio and thought, Should I try something, too? And got to work by myself, laying down a drum beat like, bum-tss-bum-tss. It wasn’t quite as soft as the version that exists now; I sang the melody a little more intensely. I was thinking of a song that would be a little more energetic than the sentimental melody it has now, but when I gave it to the producer, he said, “Oh, not bad,” and, “I think a melancholy feel would suit you. What do you think?” I agreed with the suggestion, so the song ended up sounding a little cuter than what I first envisioned.

I’m guessing that’s why it develops into a rock-like group chorus later in the song. It’s interesting, the way it sounds like reggae at the beginning and naturally progresses into something fierce. Jimin: Yes. I think it just came out that way. That happened, then they said, “Should we put this on the album?” And that’s where the theme of friendship with Taehyung came from.

Speaking of “Friends,” how do you see the other members of BTS now? I imagine you feel the same as your “Tony Montana” days, but with some things different, too. Jimin: They’re more than just friends, brothers or family—they just feel like a place you can always come back to. What I really felt when we were in the US recently was that I had times where I would have a lot of things going on in my head, and after I went through all that and came back around and talked with the other members, a lot of times they would tell me, “Ah, I see. I sort of figured. But I think you’ll be okay if you just keep doing what you’re doing. It’s all good.” It’s hard to put into words exactly, but I always got the impression they’re this powerful force that mentally helps me to return to my true self. So they’re more than just cool—it’s just, “thank you always.” It’s hard to put into words, but it’s something like that. (laughs)

© source

#bangtan #jimin #m:weverse magazine #t:interview #220618

[asking-jude]

Hello Jude!

asking this in a few different places so don't worry if you see this elsewhere!

Need Advice. Might make an account on the website if I need more, but for now just here. I'm gonna ramble a little, bear with me ;;

I'm aroace and currently have what is pretty much the world's WORST gush/smush (platonic/cedural crush) EVER what do i do about it!!!!

i'm not particularly interested in getting into any kind of qp relationship with him due to several factors, (including that even if i was, it'd most likely be a firm "no" lmao)

I just need advice on how to handle these feelings!!!

i'm really reallllly attached to him and attracted in several ways (not rom & sx ofc) and lately it's been hard to stop thinking and daydreaming about him 24/7.

TL:DR = Aroace, madly in qplatonic love w a friend of mine, completely obsessed & infatuated & idk what to do

thoughts??? ;;

Do you want free mental help? What about remote, pay-what-you-want counselling? Visit askingjude.org.

Sounds like you certainly care very much about this guy and feel very close to him. It’s a wonderful thing! It’s still possible for friends to have a great degree of emotional intimacy and mutual affection (physical or emotional/verbal) towards each other because romantic relationships are not the end-all-be-all of human relationships.

I think what often happens in amatonormative cultures is that friendships are seen as placeholders, practice rounds, or consolation prizes for romantic relationships. Amatonormative cultures have practices and ideas that center romantic love and relationships and prioritizes them over other relationships; these cultures tend to reward romance-seeking behavior over friendship-seeking behavior or other types of relationships because romantic love is often valued important than platonic love in these cultures. What these cultures miss is that romantic relationships cannot meet all of our social and emotional needs as humans. This is okay because humans are complex creatures with a diverse array of needs; putting all of that on one person is just unfair. Perhaps some of your own discomfort comes from feeling some of that pressure.

In other words, I think you might need a different word here than friendship because I don’t think that it encompasses the intensity of your feelings. There’s nothing wrong with feeling such a desire for emotional closeness and emotional intimacy; friendships and familial relationships can certainly get pretty deep! Perhaps these are what you look for in your relationships with people.

You seem to have a good aroace vocabulary already; I think browsing this will help diversify it some more to help you identify your feelings: https://www.aromanticism.org/en/attraction-relationship-terms

In addition, the Greeks have several names for different types of love. Perhaps one of these works for you: https://www.wellandgood.com/greek-words-for-love/. #2 and #4 seem like they apply to your current situation.

Are you familiar with the Netflix show Big Mouth? It’s a funny show about teenagers who are going through puberty accompanied by hormone monsters and other creatures. It’s for adults, though, so if you’re still a minor, please, ignore the link that I’m sharing here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BoDrHF8BJTc.

This video is about Jessi and Ali, two characters who become friends over the course of the show, and bond over a shared cause. Jessi isn’t quite sure if what she feels is romantic love, but she knows it’s not an ordinary friendship; she feels too close to Ali to say they’re “just friends,” but she isn’t quite sure if it’s even a crush. Perhaps this will help you better make sense of your own feelings.

I think it’s okay to talk to him about your feelings and let him know he means a lot to you. What kind of person wouldn’t want to know they have such a dedicated and caring friend like you? By that same token, remember that friendships aren’t exclusive like most romantic relationships; people can (and should) have at least a few friends so that there’s not too much pressure on anyone. Why not ensure that you two always have some quality time together? Pick a day or an event to go to and make it a regular thing for just the two of you; you get your needs met without turning your friendship into something neither of you want. (If you aren’t ready for a QPP, that’s okay; just remember that every QPP is as unique as the people in them.)

Friendships are often seen as so simple and uncomplicated because children form them so quickly, but that’s because they form from people being in close proximity to each other for so long; building genuine, healthy bonds takes a lot more effort than just being in the same building all day. When you’re an adult (especially), friendships take time and effort to grow and blossom because you have more going on in your lives other than going to school, doing homework, doing chores, etc. Sounds like you’re willing to foster a great friendship with this guy!

Feel free to come back if you have any other questions.

Socially-distanced hugs, Angelica Barile

Ask A Question Here

#ask #advice #mental health #friendship advice #love advice #relationship advice #lgbtq advice #aroace advice #ace #aro #lgbtq

[thatvl]

V/SEX: Gio Talks Photography, Intimacy, Dating, and SEX!

Coca: Welcome to V-Sex, I’m so excited that you’re here for this interview! So, first tell the virtual world who are you and a bit about yourself!

Gio: Hello. My name Gio, I’m 28 years young. Born and raised in Compton California. I like to think I’m a very laid back kinda guy. Not too much in the mix of things, but I’ve currently got into the photography field. I enjoy taken photos and allowing my creative juices flow.

Coca: Yess! We love to hear it. I actually have been following you and your photography page for a long time now, and one thing that I want to talk about that I noticed in your photography is that it captures a sense of intimacy - whether among friends or lovers, is that intentional?

Gio: Um yes. I’ve always enjoy the intimacy of black love culture so I wanted to bring that light onto my imvu creativeness. It’s just something powerful about it sparks my vision for new things when it comes to photographing. Right now I’m thinking of new ideas to really bring that out more.

Coca: Yes and intimacy is a powerful act as a whole. Oftentimes, when I speak with my clients they often talk about a lack of intimacy in their relationships or even friendships, and I believe it is important that individuals, especially in our community sees that.

So, you created a series of photos not too long ago of a gay couple titled, “LevxArlo,” I must know, what sparked that idea and does it come from any personal experiences?

Gio: Okay so I’ve had my instagram account for almost 4yrs, if not already. And I’ve always displayed different avatars. But never a couple. At least not a joint page so I came up with the idea in a world of my own. To create this gay couple and share the journey to my followers. Seeing gay couples being represented in a positive way should always be a good thing. A lot of the stories I tell with my gay Avis are from personal experiences. but also a fantasy world.

Coca: Well, I definitely believe it helps with bringing positive representation of gay couples on VU. So, in your own words, what does intimacy mean to you?

Gio: To me intimacy means close and personal. That’s either amongst friends. Or partner. It’s really important to feel that warmth connection.

Coca: Absolutely. Intimacy plays a big role in those relationships. Studies have shown that when you have a sense of intimacy in your life, it enhances the quality of your life.

Coca: So, you have to know that this next question was coming LOL. You’re a person that lives a pretty private life and the VU world would like to know - if you’re single, dating, married, in relationship?

Gio: LOL! I’m single, yes.

Coca: So, do you date often on VU & what’s your take on the virtual dating scene?

Gio: I don’t date on vu. I’ve been there done that. My experience wasn’t as magical as most people make it seem as. I’ve been on VU for 6 years now. I like to believe it was just bad timing, possibly the wrong person, I don’t know. Ever since, I’ve just never looked back into vu dating. Can’t say I’ll be open to it either. Dating on imvu is a process. You have to be willing to communicate on any level with someone. Communication is a serious thing in any matter. It’s not about taking photos and being cute to me, those are bonuses. But, getting to know someone is important. The same way you would look at dating in the real world. Yes, it’s virtual and you can make it whatever, but remember your feelings, your real life feelings will be involved. I mean, I think it’s a decent thing to do on imvu. Only if it’s for you.

Coca: Absolutely. I see that people sometimes get caught up in the pictures and the cute moments that comes with being in a relationship but don’t understand that long distance/virtual relationships is a real thing that involves actual feelings. It’s an experience that isn’t for everyone.

FIREY ROUND OF SEX QUESTIONS ❤️‍🔥

Coca: The last segment that we’re about to dive into is a speed round of questions. I’ll ask you five sexy questions and you’ll answer! 😉

1. What’s one of your sexual fantasies?

Gio: Ooo hmm! I love role play anything nothing you normally see like cops & robbers. I’m talking Vampire and wearwovles. Cowboys & Indian type fantasy I have a few lol.

Coca: Omg yesss! I have a cowboy fantasy as well lol I literally made a post the other day saying how I would loveeeeeee for my partner to fuck me with chaps and a cowboy hat on LOL.

2. What’s your favorite position?

Gio: Missionary. It’s the eye contact. The moaning into each other mouth for meeee lol.

3. Spit or swallow?

Gio: Lol ooo spit.

4. Do you remember losing your VU virginity and what was the experience like? 😜

Gio: Lol till this day I still have my VU V-card.

Coca: WHAT!

Gio: I know right! I mean I’ve only dated the guy for like 2 months, no sex involved, like strictly dating.

Coca: Well, let me tell you. There’s nothing wrong with it. But, trust me, you’re going to have some people hitting you up wanting to take it when I post this LOL.

Gio: LMAO! Lord, I mean if things would’ve worked out, I probably wouldn’t have my V-card. I’m not saying it never would’ve happen because me being me it definitely would have. But shit happens, I guess.

Coca: That’s understandable and so my final question, although you’re still a VU virgin lol, I believe we can learn from anyone. So, what advice would you give for people who are trying to spice it up in the VU sheets?

Gio: If you really want to spice things up, you have to think outside the box. Put aside the normal and really get into some fun things. Again it’s RolePlay, it should be limitless pleasure. You want your partner to really feel it as though it’s real. Give them something they’re not use to but something that feeds the both of y’all desires. Communicate with actionss!!

Coca: Yes! Yes! Yes! I say it all the time as a sex educator lol communicate + actions = loads of pleasure.

Coca: Thank you so much for speaking with me for V-Sex, I really enjoyed this conversation! 😜

Gio: Yess! Thank you for having me! It was definitely something new for me. I really enjoy it myself lol.

[marbleheavy]

I did Nico so here are some Will Solace headcanons that have bouncing around my brain for a while now

He goes through a sweater phase where he wears almost exclusively slightly too big, brightly colored, knit sweaters with thick collars and cinched sleeves

He read that fact about how if your tongue sticks to a rock it’s actually a bone, and now he licks every rock he finds because “What if it’s the bone of a dinosaur? What if I’m licking part of a T-Rex right now?” (and Nico just lets him do it even though he knows they aren’t bones)

REALLY into pinkie promises. Like, he takes them so seriously. Pinkie promise > swearing on the Styx

He takes a lot of chaotic self timer pictures and always ropes everyone else into them. They always end up looking like an album cover and he looks like he’s the lead singer. It’s not even that he’s always front and center, it’s just the way that he’s holding himself in every picture. When he gets his own apartment or house or whatever, he makes a collage of them all and he has every one of his friends choose a picture and write what the name of the album would be on it.

Going off of that, he is really into crafts but specifically memory crafts (does that make sense???). He makes keepsake boxes and friendship bracelets and so many things because he feels like it doesn’t matter if those things actually look good because the most important part of them is the memory attached.

He uses either 🤠 or ✨ (sometimes 🤪) in almost every text and uses them to convey any emotion. Rachel is the only one who ever understands exactly what he means.

A million friendship and bead bracelets just all the way up his arms. Probably some silly bands too.

He carries a backpack with him almost all the time and it somehow holds every possible necessity but always looks nearly empty. Obviously a first aid kit, but also like snacks and a hat and sunscreen and a million pens and the list goes on and on. It’s kind of in a mom friend way but more of a thing where someone sees “i need x item” and Will just hands it to them wordlessly without even stopping his sentence.

He adores the face masks that are supposed to make you look like an animal but they’re mostly just scary. They make him giggle like a toddler. (Imagine him and Nico with the fluffy headbands with the ears and then the face masks and Will just absolutely losing his shit)

Hozier!! Will loves Hozier!! Also country music (but he has a whole spiel about new age, american exceptionalist pop country because he h a t e s that). Also, and this is the really important one, 80s music but the really synth-y stuff (see my 80s cover band au for more details)

His ideal outfit is a chunky sweater, a jean jacket, jeans that don’t match the jacket, and rain boots. He loves rain boots. He’s got multiple pairs and at least one of them have frogs on them. If he can’t wear rain boots, flip flops in the summer and vans in the other seasons (He’s definitely got a pair of these yellow Vans)

He dresses like a dad but a dad that was born in the 80s and is also three years old

Will has at least three flavors of chapstick on him at any given time

Will Solace with a gun is wonderful, truly. I would like to add to this by introducing the concept of him wearing the side holsters on either this legs or his arms. He wants to go on quests so he can live his dreams of being a cowboy with thigh gun holsters and a hat and boots and all of it. (Also, Nico with knives strapped to his thighs and Will with guns) (Also, also, there’s a Cards Against Humanity card that says “Shooting a wizard with a gun” and that screams Will Solace)

Will is very much a “Let’s not resort to violence” person but in a way where like, Person A tries to punch B and Will is like “hey, we can talk this out” but then B doubles down and says something really out of line and Will just backs up and is like “You know what? Never mind, you do what you need to do” (And also in a “Let’s not fight… except for Nico because isn’t he so pretty with his sword?)

speaking of pretty, Will l o v e s to be called pretty. It makes his sweet summer child heart go brrr

He is obviously very into nicknames and terms of endearment but calling someone “Hon” or “Sweet pea” is always passive aggressive (that’s less of a Will thing and more of a Southern thing)

I would like to bring up the licking rocks thing again because I really do just believe it with my whole heart

For a while, the idea of Will’s grandparents (obviously Naomi’s side) being French has been bouncing around my head and I really do love the idea of Will speaking French fluently but not at all formally. It’s a lot of slang and has a Texas drawl mixed in with it but it’s definitely French (and it definitely makes Nico melt). He will just deadpan look at someone and go “Quoi?” and he counts the infirmary inventory stock in French but only up until sixty, then he switches to English (soixante-dix can suck it, sorry if you’re french but like, just make a new word. there’s no need for me to have to do math while already counting. don’t even get me started on anything in the 90s. quatre-vingt-dix-sept?? excuse me??)

Will and Persephone being buddies!! They just get along well and very much understand being summer people in love with anti-sun people and just, ugh, family dinners in the Underworld and Will always, always brings a gift for her. Will and Nico come in and anyone can hear Persephone yell “Is that Will? Is Will here?” and Will just grins and calls back “Yes ma’am, and I brought you some brownies from my Mama and some of the flowers from her garden”

Also, Nico knows all the deities and Will brings them cookies because they’re a team like that

He either plays soccer or lacrosse but either way he’s very good at it and it’s honestly intimidating (jock will solace <3)

Not to say Will isn’t his fair share of chaotic, but he’s friends with a lot of very chaotic or at the least eccentric people (Cecil and his pranks, Lou Ellen and her pig balls, Rachel and herself, Nico and himself, etc.) so he’s very good at turning on the Southern charm and just smiling his way out of any situation so he can get himself and everyone else away without any consequences

I think that’s all for now!! If you have any additions, please feel free to add them on, I love seeing other people’s ideas!

#will solace #will solace headcanon #nico di angelo #solangelo #pjo #i have so many thoughts about will #jock will solace <3 #will solace licks rocks

[somerabbitholes]

Indian Non-Fiction

A list of books on India, almost all of which are by Indian writers; most of them are about history in one way or other but they also involve politics, culture, and religion. (Doesn’t include writing in Indian languages because most of my non-English reading has been limited to fiction). I’ve also added links to online editions for ones I found.

History

Pre-, Postcolonial India (+ other assorted history)

Land of Seven Rivers by Sanjeev Sanyal - looks at Indian history through its geography; great if you want an introduction. it’s a small book but has very interesting insights; definitely would recommend. Also check his Ocean of Churn, which looks at Indian history in terms of the Indian Ocean

The Lost River: On the Trail of the Sarasvati by Michel Danino - looks into the research and evidence on the existence of the Sarasvati river and makes a case for its existence

Hooghly: The Global History of a River by Robert Ivermee - about Hooghly as a centre of a trans-Asiatic and trans-oceanic commercial network

Indians: A Brief History of a Civilization by Namit Arora - what it says, it’s new and was well-received; it paints a holistic picture to start you off

Modern South India by Rajmohan Gandhi - this one’s new, and I’ve only barely read it. It’s the history of south India from the coming of the Portuguese to modern times and it’s really important because we don’t study about this or even talk about this in mainstream conversations

India Moving by Chinmay Tumbe - on migration within India and how migrants and migrations has shaped history, politics, and policy

The Courtesan, the Mahatma, and the Italian Brahmin by Manu Pillai - a selection of stories (real ones) from Indian history; very engagingly written and very, very interesting stories. Also check other works by Pillai - The Ivory Throne and Rebel Sultans. He also writes a regular column for the Mint

Panipat by Vishwas Patil - (a translation from Marathi) a history of the Battle at Panipat in 1761, which basically created a vacuum for the East India Company to step in and grab power; really expansive and highly detailed

Rama and Ayodhya by Meenakshi Jain - on the Ramayana and its cultural spread across Indian since the ancient times; also about the Ayodhya movement

Decolonizing the Hindu Mind by Koenraad Elst - lays down the ideological and intellectual development of the broad umbrella Hindu revivalist movement; really good starting point to understand the rise and development of a significant chunk of Indian politics in post-independence years; really straightforward work, very clear in its objectives

1962: the War that Wasn’t by Shiv Kunal Verma - on the Sino-Indian conflict in 1962; haven’t read it yet, but it’s supposed to be one of the best ones on the conflict

1971: A Global History of the Creation of Bangladesh by Srinath Raghavan - on the creation of Bangladesh; places the history in a Cold War context and includes all stakeholders like the US, China and Russia; has multiple layers to its narrative.The Most Dangerous Place by Srinath Raghavan - on American foreign policy in South Asia right from the earliest times.

Cricket Country by Prashant Kidambi - about how cricket took hold in colonial India and the making of the first all-India cricket team; super excited about this book, I added it to my list too

A Corner of a Foreign Field by Ramchandra Guha - on the growth of cricket in India; takes into account race, caste, and religion in pre- and postcolonial times; looks at how the sport was adapted in local cultures and how it became an expression of resistance

Himalaya: A Human History by Ed Douglas - basically what it says; very thorough and very fresh; about more than India because it takes Himalaya as a unit and so it’s really transnational in its approach

Colonial India

Plassey by Sudeep Chakravarti - a very detailed study of the Battle of Plassey which kicked off the colonial project in India

India’s War: World War II and the Making of Modern South Asia by Srinath Raghavan - on India’s involvement and contribution in World War II

An Era of Darkness by Shashi Tharoor - about the economic impact of the British Empire in India; highly elaborate and detailed work on the economic drain in India during colonisation

Goa Inquisition by A. K. Priolkar - about the Portuguese colonisation of Goa and the subsequent evangelical campaign by the Portuguese crown and the Roman church; very, very, thorough and great if you (like me) know nothing about the whole thing

Hicky’s Bengal Gazette by James Otis - on the development and running of India’s first English newspaper; a fun read because honestly the story of the paper is very dramatic and full of political/colonial gossip; also tells you a lot about the early ideas of free press in colonial India

Sati: Evangelicals, Baptist Missionaries, and the Changing Colonial Discourse by Meenakshi Jain - about the discourse on sati and the need for reform; reviews the idea of the abolition of sati being a progressive act

Castes of Mind by Nicholas Dirks - about the intersection of caste, race, and colonial knowledge and policy

Politics, Sociology, Commentaries

The Indian Trilogy by V. S. Naipaul - a semi-autobiographical work on the kind of civilisation Naipaul sees India to be; very, very honest; paints a picture of postcolonial India over the years. the trilogy includes An Area of Darkness, India: A Wounded Civilization, and India: A Million Mutinies Now. I’ve only read the first one; but I’ve heard and read great things about them all

Republic of Caste by Anand Teltumbde - about caste in post-Independence India; looks at political and policy-related developments and their impact on caste dynamics; sort of subaltern history; it is a little difficult to understand if you don’t already have some amount of knowledge on Indian politics; also a very academic work so not exactly easy to read - I’ve only read parts of it myself

Annihilation of Caste by Dr. B. R. Ambedkar - technically a speech that was never delivered because it was thought to be too explosive; argues that caste is rooted in oppression and for the complete destruction of the caste system; an excellent work, although you do need to know about caste in its religious and political terms. Really just read all of his writing (it’s an entire 14 volume set), they’re excellent and far ahead of their time

The Idea of India by Sunil Khilnani - an analysis of sorts of what pre-colonial and colonial society and the freedom struggle mean for the republic and the kind of nation-building that has happened.

A New India of India: Individual Rights in a Civilisational State by Harsh Madhusudan, Rajeev Mantri - rethinks the “idea of India”; traces cultural and historical legacy in making of modern politics, and explores how individual rights are reconciled with the state’s goals; great thing is that it takes a fresh look at things; perfect to be read after The Idea of India 

10 Judgements that Changed India by Zia Mody - recounts ten most important legal cases and court rulings in India; good starting point at understanding how the law works and its development

Republic of Religion by Abhinav Chandrachud - about secularism and religion in India in light of colonial rule, and its implications in postcolonial India

India Unbound by Gurcharan Das - it’s a history from the Independence to 2000 that focuses largely on the political economy and unpacks the kind of growth we’ve seen; it mixes the personal with the political/economic progress and it’s really easy to get into; best when read with his India Grows at Night

People

Kanshiram by Badri Narayan - a biography of Kanshi Ram, who pretty much laid the foundation of modern Dalit political movement in post-independence India; looks into how the movement developed under Kanshi Ram; a useful insight into both the man as well as early Dalit politics in India

Savarkar by Vikram Sampath - first part of a two-part biography (second part isn’t out yet) on V. D. Savarkar, one of India’s first revolutionary freedom fighter; looks at an insane variety of sources and highly detailed; a must read.

History Men by T. C. A. Raghavan - about the friendship of three of colonial India’s first native historians (Sir Jadunath Sarkar, G. S. Sardesai, Raghubir Sinh) and how they collaborated and supported each other in writing Indian history using scientific methods; also looks at their contributions to Indian history in general

Rammohun Roy by Amiya P. Sen - a biography of colonial India’s first social and religious reformers who reinterpreted Hinduism for modern times; very well-written, great for understanding how early reform worked out

Daughters of the Sun by Ira Mukhoty - about women in the Mughal dynasty. note that it only looks at women connected to and part of the royal household, but an interesting read nonetheless. Her other work, Heroines: Powerful Indian Women in Myth and History is a wonderful book on women in history right from the ancient times; also analyses and explains the changing perceptions of women

R. N. Kao: Gentleman Spymaster by Nitin Gokhale - really, really, really interesting book on R. N. Kao and the development of India’s espionage machinery

Art

Indian Art by Partha Mitter - a history, he’s one of the best on Indian art, very useful

The Dance of Shiva by Ananda Coomaraswamy - a collection of essays on Indian artistic tradition in aesthetic and philosophical terms

The Spirit of Indian Painting by B. N. Goswamy - specifically about painting; explores different themes in different regionals tyles; also check other books by Goswamy, he’s kind of a big deal in art history

Indian Painting: the Lesser Known Traditions by Anna Dallapiccola - pretty much what it says; takes into account a ton of styles and traditions that are lumped together ‘folk art’

Cities, Travel etc

The Great Indian Railway Bazaar by Paul Theroux - four-month journey from London to India by trains only; explores themes like colonialism, American imperialism, poverty. One of my favourites

The Epic City by Kushanava Chaudhary - memoir on Kolkata as the author explores and re-discovers the city when he comes back to it after staying in the US for most of his life; a lovely book, delves in the history of Kolkata a little in relation to how the city still feels it, how its people are still negotiating with it, and the kind of future the author sees for Kolkata

Bombay, Meri Jaan by Jerry Pinto & Naresh Fernandes - a collection of essays on Mumbai by a wide collection of people from Naipaul to Khushwant Singh to Manto and Salman Rushdie, compiled by Jerry Pinto; one of my favourites on the city

No Full Stops in India by Mark Tully - writings from when Tully was a journalist in India; commentaries on things he witnesses, also includes a fair amount of personal involvement; explores poverty, postcolonial development, religion and culture in post-independence India

Mumbai Fables by Gyan Prakash - a history of Mumbai city; looks at colonisation, industrial development, the regional politics, architecture and art, as well as the underworld/mafia

Banaras by Diana L. Eck - on Varanasi (Banaras), probably India’s holiest city; tells its history from its conception to now; blends religion, mythology, politics, and history. Also check Eck’s India: A Sacred Geography

The City of Djinns by William Dalrymple - semi-autobiography about living in Delhi; looks at the legacies of independence and partition while thinking about its past

The Book of Indian Journeys by Dom Moraes - it’s an anthology of essays and excerpts from works of a bunch of writers on travelling in India, it’s a favourite when I’m travelling

This is not exhaustive and I will keep updating when I find the time. I’ve tried to keep it diverse (and organised) in its content; hope you find something you like :)

#india #booklr #bookblr #bookstagram #book recommendations #book #reading #history #history major #historyblr #indian history #good reads #book list #academia #asia #south asia #desi academia #book recs

[cazimagines]

Oblivious

Request from anon: Hi, I really enjoy your writing, particularly your Zemo fics! I had an idea for one that basically follows the while y/n joining Sam, Bucky, and Zemo through Madirpoor and Riga. Only despite Zemo’s flirting, y/n doesn’t really do anything about it or even notice until y/n along with Sam and Bucky witness Walker (New Captian America) murder a flag smasher in the street. They all go back to the safe house and y/n is like, in shock. “Captian America just killed someone” is all y/n can really say. And Zemo is able to calm them down. Maybe the romance can start then?

Word count: 3.4k

Author’s note: This one-shot can be multiple parts, if you would like to see a sequel please say! If I do decide to write a sequel though it will take me a while as I’ve had a lot of requests, please check out my master list to see what I have coming up next and if requests are currently open or not

Masterlist

(Please check out my master list to see what I will be writing next and if requests are open or closed)

Cross-posted to ao3 under the same username

Heels clicked along the pavement as you sashayed along the road, approaching the men before you, two of which you know fondly. The other one, however... not so much.

They all stood close together in a circle, obviously discussing something important but at hearing your voice call out their heads turn towards you, a smile appearing on Sam and Bucky’s faces as they see you. “Long time no see boys,” you say, stopping a few feet away from them to lean on a wall.

They both walk over to you, Bucky pulling you into and hug then followed by Sam hugging you tightly. “Thank you for agreeing to help us out y/n. I know things haven’t been easy for you,”

You fake a smile at Bucky, one you hoped he wouldn’t see past resting your arm around his shoulder. “Anything for my friends,”

He was right, though. These times haven’t been easy for you, especially after Steve Rodgers left. Captain America had always been your idol, ever since you were a little kid you aspired to be just like him. You collected all the Captain America merchandise along with your brother Phil, always arguing with him who owned which toy of his. Meeting Steve had been a dream come true for you. He was the person you were closest to. He helped you come to terms with your brother’s death and whenever you needed help; he was there. You two stuck together through the thick and thin. That’s was how you got to become good friends with Sam and Bucky. You and Steve have always had a complicated relationship, though. You two liked each other and tried to see if you could be something more, but it never seemed to work out. Then Thanos happened. You, along with half the universe, were dusted. For you it was as if you had simply blinked however for Steve it was five years without you. You barely got to see each other again before he went away for good. You couldn’t hate him for it, you understood why he did what he did. He was always telling you about the ’40s, about his childhood, about her. You just wished you weren’t so connected with him. Seeing him there, old, dying. It broke your heart. But times move on. You can’t live in the past as he did.

Your eyes focus on the man behind Sam and Bucky and you frown, pulling your arm away from Bucky. A man you never thought you would see again was staring right back at you.

He stood a few feet back, knowing he wasn’t welcomed in the warm reunion of friendship. He clasped his hands, unsure what exactly he should do right now, feeling awkward, but as he looked over at you his eyes twinkled with recognition. Now you had been interesting to him. You weren’t a super soldier like Steve and James. Yet you certainly could hold your own against them. He had seen when he had first activated James. No, your strength and fighting abilities were down to your own human powers and he admired that. You were one of the few avengers he might have had an inkling to like if the Sokovia attack never happened. Still, it wasn’t as if you were to blame for it. The people who were to blame had suffered for it. You were merely the pawn in the giant game of chess. Perhaps he could grow to like you, after all, he could admit you were certainly tempting to him, the way your body was shaped excited him, the way your neck was shaped made him want to brush his fingers along it and your piercing eyes felt like they could look into the darkest corners of his soul.

“Why is he out of prison?” you snap, bringing Zemo out of his trance

Sam turns to scowl at Bucky as you all turn to Zemo, who awkwardly smiles. “Bucky thinks we need him,” Sam mutters

“Why would we need him!” you exclaim, crossing your arms and shooting Bucky a glare.

“I am invaluable,” Zemo explains with his hands, his eyes unwavering from you as he answers for Bucky.

“He hates super-soldiers, therefore he will help us in getting to Karli,” Bucky says, stepping in front of your eyesight trying to explain himself.

“That also means he hates you, Buck,”

All of them freeze as you address the elephant in the room. Bucky grits his teeth and steps back, averting your gaze as you and Sam stare expectedly at him but he doesn’t respond so Zemo takes his opportunity to step closer to you, now only a few feet apart.

“I can assure you, getting rid of Karli and her super soldier friends is my priority. Not James,”

You clench your jaw in anger as you look at Zemo. He tilts his head, the side of his lip curling up slightly, hoping you’d take a chance on him. Sighing, you turn to shoot one more look at Bucky.

“Steve wouldn’t have liked this,”

Later you sat across from Zemo on his private jet. All of you sat in uncomfortable silence as you flew to Madripoor. Sam and Bucky did not seem as close as you were to both of them. They both just sat on their respective sides and looked out the window. Zemo had a book on him which he seemed very preoccupied reading, yet there were moments where you could feel his eyes settle upon you. Ignoring his inquisitive gaze, you choose to follow in Bucky and Sam’s lead of looking out the window and daydream the rest of the trip away.

Your mind trails back to Steve. You wondered just what Steve would have thought about you teaming up with Zemo. He would have understood, wouldn’t he? It was the best option you had. Ah, but he had always been such a stickler about the rules. Breaking a criminal out and helping him avoid the law wasn’t very patriotic of you. Yep, he would not have gone through with this plan, he would have found another way that worked. But none of the people here were him. He choose not to be here. You knew you had to let him go.

“Champagne?”

You pull your eyes away from the window, coming back to reality as you see a bottle of champagne in Zemo’s hand and an empty glass in his other hand. He already had another glass full beside him as he looked at you expectantly.

“No,”

“Sure?”

“What part of no do you not understand,” you snap harshly glaring at him then back out to the window

“My apologies,” he says, pursing his lips together as he looks down at the empty glass. He glances over to Sam and Bucky but they both shake their heads as well so he hands the glass and drinks back to his butler and sighs as he opens his book again.

The tension between all of you sticks around as you arrive at Madripoor. Zemo had provided you a tight-fitting dress to ‘appear the part’ of your allice, and it showed off a bit too much of your chest than you liked. It was too bright for you, golden and sparky, cutting off at your upper tight, and had a very low v cut. You try your best to pull it down to cover you some more but to no avail. Begrudgingly, you leave the plane to meet up with the rest of them.

“My my y/n, the dress suits you,” Zemo says, smirking as his eyes trail up and down your body as you walk past him taking a straight beeline towards Sam and Bucky.

“How long will this mission take?” you ask, already feeling the cold air nip at your skin.

“Few hours at the least. I’m sorry that you have to do this, y/n”

“Hey, I knew what I was getting into when I agreed to help you two,” you mutter as you hear a car pulling up behind you

“Not exactly this though,” Bucky grumbles, glowering over at Zemo who motions to the car that had arrived. Zemo opens the door and waits for you to get in however you walk to the other side of the car and get in. Bucky chuckles at Zemo’s annoyed expression as he instead gets into the side, which Zemo held open.

During the mission, Zemo kept getting uncomfortably close to you. Occasionally his hand brushed against your back as he moved past you, or his hand would bump into yours slightly, lingering against yours longer than normal.

You knew why he was doing this. Because of Steve. He knew how close you and Steve were, everyone did. During the fight between Steve and Tony which Zemo had helped cause you stuck by Steve every second. Now that Steve was gone, Zemo was trying to rub that in. Trying to irritate you on purpose. You would not let him get to you.

During the meeting with Selby you stood off to the side with Sam and you were feeling pretty good about yourself that the mission was going well until Sam’s phone rang. You tried to keep cool while also giving Sam the wtf look as to why he didn’t put his phone on silent. You hung out hoping things would go okay, but today wasn’t your day.

Shelby got gunned down in front of you, and the mission was ruined. Running in heels wasn’t ideal, but you had to make do. You followed Sam and Bucky as Zemo split up from you, running off somewhere else. Eventually, you kicked off your heels, believing running barefoot would be better than dealing with the agony of heels.

Finally, meeting back up with Zemo, you were ready to have to fight your way out of this mess, but then someone you didn’t think you would ever see again appeared. Sharon Carter. You two weren’t exactly buddy buddies. You got along for Steve’s sake, but it always felt like a sort of rivalry between you two for his attention.

“Y/n,” she says, finally addressing you

“Sharon,” you say back, feeling the awkwardness seep back in. Sharon didn’t seem bothered however, she even kindly let you have some new clothes and shoes which were much more comfortable than the ones Zemo lent you and more your style.

Walking back into the main room you see Zemo sitting down, once again drinking, Bucky sitting down as far away from Zemo as he could get and Sam standing at the side. You choose to stand by Sam.

“Hey, y/n, you doing okay?” Sam asks as you walk over.

“Better than other days. What are we waiting around for?”

“For Sharon to lead us to a party where she can get the information we need,” Zemo answers for Sam, peeking over at you. You ignore him.

Sharon comes back in and tells all of you not to get in trouble while you are out at the party.

“Trouble,” Zemo jokes, and he once again glances over to you, raising a glass and winking at you as he downs it.

Following Sharon, you head into the party. It was to show off the art pieces she had got a hold of so you thought you might as well look at them as you were unlikely to see any of these genuine pieces again. You could see however Zemo following you. He tried to be sly by checking out the other artworks near you, never exactly where you were, but you could tell because every time you moved to a new place soon enough Zemo would suddenly appear there as well. He leaned into one of the artworks, pretending to study it closely, but the corner of his eyes would flick over to you.

Groaning in frustration at your new stalker, you decide you had to lose him in the crowds. Swaying your body, you enter the dancing crowd and jump along to the music, letting yourself go. You could feel your excitement growing with the crowd as you danced, but with one quick turn around there, you saw him.

Zemo had now entered the crowd and was dancing along to the music as well, pumping his hands in time to it. As you stared at him in disbelief, he notices and takes that as an innovation to dance over to you.

“Dancing is fun, right?” he asks as he claps his hand to the music

“Why are you doing this!” you exclaim glaring at him.

His eyebrows furrow as he looks at you, “I don’t understand what you mean?”

You huff in annoyance and storm away, going to find Sam and Bucky leaving Zemo alone on the dance floor. He watches you go and sighs, moving away from the dance floor. It had been a long time since he last got to socialize with anyone and he was trying with you; he wanted to know you more, but he didn’t want to push you too far either if you were uncomfortable with it.

The next few hours felt like a blur to everyone. Sharon found out where the doctor was and you found out a bit of information before Zemo choose to shoot him. Then the whole place exploded, and you had to fight for your life while Zemo hijacked and car to pick you up. Now you were standing outside the safe house.

Zemo opened up the doors, and with his arm motioned for you to go in first. You roll your eyes at his extravagance and storm in, looking around the place. It was simple, but you could still tell that it was all designer, expensive to Zemo’s tastes. You sit down on the sofa while Zemo instantly gravitates towards the liquor cupboard.

“If you drink so much you won’t have long left to live” you mutter as you watch him pour some whiskey. His head shoots up as he turns sidewards to look at you, raising an eyebrow.

“Concerned about my health now?”

“I’d rather have you not pass out during a mission, at least till you are no longer of use to us then you can drink yourself to death for all I care,”

“Ah concern for the mission, yes you avengers folks are all the same. The mission takes precedence before anything else,” Zemo says, grabbing his glass and walking over to take a seat on the sofa opposite you.

You give him a cold hard stare crossing your arms. “What do you mean by that” you hiss

He tilts his head, smirking as he sees how riled up you were getting. “I’m simply observing that you have to put your mission before human lives. I know from how much I studied Steve-”

“Don’t bring Steve into this!” you exclaim, leaning forward, baring your teeth at him.

Zemo pauses for a moment shocked, he pulls his head back to observe, his mouth slightly ajar as his eyebrows cast down but realization dawns across his face.

“Ah, you and Steve, you two were an item,”

“It wasn’t like that” you murmur, jumping up from the sofa and pacing around the room to try to alleviate the agitation you felt, your nails digging into your arms as you wrapped them around your body in comfort.

“But there was something,” Zemo replies, watching you pace around the room then looking into the glass bitterly, his grip on it tightening.

You turn your back to Zemo to stare at your reflection in the mirror, seeing the tears swell up in your eyes.

“Why are you bringing this up? Why do you keep trying to annoy me Zemo, what purpose are you getting from this apart from some sick sadistic pleasure?”

It was Zemo’s turn to jump up from the sofa, hurt you could ever think so lowly of him, his eyebrows furrowed as he speeds over to you. He stands beside you, getting a lot closer to you than you would like. You turned your head away so he couldn’t see the tears threatening to fall.

“Do you think that bad of me? Y/n we may not have had the best first impression but know that it is never my intention to irritate or upset you,” Zemo says, trying to move even closer to you, but he moves a step too far and you back away.

“Just leave me alone, Zemo” you whisper, then run out of the room to find a bathroom to let everything out.

Zemo watches your form leave, angrily clenching his jaw, knowing he pushed it too far. The vein in his neck twitches as he grabs an ornament by the side of the mirror. Holding it in his hand, he observes the glass figure, a dove, then chucks it into the ground in rage, feeling an inkling of satisfaction at seeing it smash into a thousand pieces. He grabs more ornaments, at that moment not caring how much they each cost, just enjoy the release of anger he felt every time he smashed one.

-

You could hear the blood in your brain roar through your ears, the feeling of your heart hitting your chest in shock as you stared down at Lemar’s dead body.

Your eyes flicker to John’s who knelt beside him, trying desperately to wake him up, but you knew it was hopeless. Lemar was gone. Your eyes flickered around the rest of the room, Karli and her friend realising how bad they have messed up were already running away from the room. Bucky and Sam looked at each other as if knowing what was to happen. Your eyes finally land on Zemo’s. John had tried to arrest him, but you were able to stop him. Zemo was still useful though you hated to admit it, it wasn’t long however till the Dora Milaje would find him.

You feel a hand brush against your shoulder and snap back into reality, “We need to leave, now,” Zemo whispered in your ear, pulling your arm to make you move.

Gathering your senses, you let Zemo lead you out of the building as you hear a crash from above. Running out into the road, you and Zemo catch up beside Sam and Bucky and watch the disaster unfold.

There was John, in Cap’s uniform, holding Cap’s shield above that man.

Steve.

Steve’s shield.

You feel a scream tear from your lips as you watch John Walker bring the shield down, penetrating the man’s chest, staining it in blood. Tears leak from your eyes as you attempt to rush forward, to try and stop it, but arms grasp onto you, pulling you back.

“NO” you repeatedly cried, trying to worm your way out of the grasp, but they gripped you, refusing to let go. Your knees gave out and you sink to the floor, collapsing in the arms of the person who held you, your head buried in the fur part of their coat as they held you to their chest.

You kept sobbing, shaking as the image replayed over and over in your mind.

“Captain America just killed someone,” you whispered, unable to say anything else. The arms which held you picked you up, quietly shushing you, and carried you down a road, back into the safe house.

They tried to put you on the sofa but you clung to their body, not believing you could survive without their support, so they settle on lying down beside you on the sofa.

They turned you to face their body as their arms draped around you, gently rubbing circles into your back. Burying your head into their chest again, you let the sobs wail out as your chest ached from breathing.

“Captain America just killed someone,” you whisper again to him.

“That wasn’t Steve, y/n, Steve would never do something like that,” he murmured, his accent soothing your nerves.

“But it was his shield Zemo. The very thing I had idolized for so long,”

“A shield which by now no longer belongs to him. He was never Captain America y/n, what we just saw proved that. They will give the shield to someone better,”

You sniff, trying to prevent the snot from coming out of your nose as your bloodshot eyes look up into his, “Really?”

He gently smiles at you, taking his hand off your back to push a strand of hair that was hanging over your eye away.

“Yes, they won’t make the same mistake twice,”

Zemo’s words brought more comfort than you could have ever imagined. His embrace brought you warmth and you could feel yourself slowly stop shaking as he held you. Looking away from Zemo in embarrassment, you instead choose to snuggle your head back into his chest, hearing the rapid beating of his heart which lulled you to sleep.

Tags: @sinister-sleep @cable-kenobi @faustlyaccused @chipster-21 @icarusinstatic @yallgotkik @montypythonsholysnail @bunniwritesx @checkurwindow @huntheimpossible @jayxkelsi @avgravy @prestigious-tea @aloyssiac @hannahbal-the-fannibal @alainabooks143 @jokerprettyprincess @plumsandkiwis @latenightartist-author @e-barba @flutterskies @wonderwoman292 @there-goes-thefighter @multiyfandomgirl40 @freyjasamael @ineffablebean

#zemo x you #baron zemo #helmut zemo #zemo #i love zemo #zemo x y/n #zemo tag #zemo fluff #tfatws #daniel brühl #marvel #mcu

[ripperdaddy]

the viktor vector romance path + ending we deserve

Disclaimer: This is definitely something I came up with in my head. There will be a few instances that are solely made up so it can tie in with the “story.” This is purely fictional; something I wished happened if there was a possible Vik romance 🥰 This is based on my general knowledge of the game & Vik’s life. All gifs + images are from my own personal play through, but wouldn’t be possible without the help of the Appearance Menu Mod, found on Nexus Mods by the creators, MaximiliumM and CtrlAltDaz. And the shirtless Vik mod by the lovely samsnak ♡

It would start after completing the Paid In Full quest where you pay Vik back the eddies you owe him.

I feel like realistically, the general player would have to be at least halfway through the story to have collected enough eddies. I would say that a good point in the story where we can begin the romance is that you’ve already established a connection to Alt and have dealt with the VDB’s.

I think it would be a short side quest like River’s. Vik already plays a big part in the story overall on his own, so I don’t think it’s necessary to make his “side quest” too long. His romance would just be an addition to the ending.

And as much as I would love for him to be a bisexual option for both male/female V, if we’re sticking with the game’s standard with limiting partners to only one kind of partner, he would only be romance-able by a female V with a feminine voice.

V: Finally scrounged up enough eddies to pay you back in full.

Vik: Hold on to ‘em just in case - you need ‘em more than me.

V: I’m not taking them all the way to my grave, Vik. Here. And.. thanks again for doing so much work on me ‘thout ever seein’ an enny.

Vik: That’s what friends are for.

Then, there is an additional option for dialogue to trigger the romance path.

V: Friends? I think you’ve been in and out of my body more than anyone else I’ve hooked up with in Night City.

He laughs, with a coy smile. “Well, can’t argue with you there. Why don’t we take some of these eddies and grab a drink. You know, to celebrate. Catch up on old times. Haven’t seen you round here much lately, kid.”

You agree to meet at the El Coyote Cojo tomorrow evening.

You meet around 9 PM and you are welcomed by the sight of Pepe and Vik at the bar.

V: Nice choice of venue.

Vik: Thought you’d like it. Haven't been here since.. well, you know.

V: I miss him, Vik.

Vik: I know, V. Me too.

You immediately take a seat and tinker with a few dialogue options, where you can either have a sweet moment talking about Jackie or some surface questions to ask, like how he’s doing, what kind of drink he likes, etc. But it all winds down to Jackie anyway, where Vik confides in you about his past. Judging by how Vik was so affected by Jackie’s death, and V’s (if you chose the suicide ending), you can tell that he has lost a lot in his life, and keeps his circle very small.

You then achieve an even closer, more personal relationship with him. But, ultimately nothing happens other than the usual, wait 24 hours in game for a text/phone call from Vik to head into the next stage. At least now, you have established the foundation for a future romance.

Halfway through the 24 hour period, you get a text from Vik thanking you for the lovely evening. No reply needed, as he calls you once the 24 hour mark hits and invites you out for another date.

You meet at Tom’s Diner for coffee in the afternoon. It starts off with him apologizing for being emotional the previous night and asks if you’re open to hanging out again and going down to Pacifica to watch a fight with him.

Vik: Hey, V. I just wanted to apologize about last night. I didn’t mean to be such a downer.

V: It’s okay, Vik. We share the same grief.

Vik: I was going to head down to Pacifica and catch a real good match later on today. I was wondering if you’d like to come along, think it’d be great for the both of us, you know, as a distraction.

pssst even Johnny’s rooting for y’all ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Johnny: Hmm, interesting.

V: What?

Johnny: Never thought you'd be going out with this guy.

V: Vik's amazing. And I mean--we basically owe it to him since he practically saved our life.

Johnny: Don't tell me you're going out with him out of pity.

V: I'm not.

Johnny: I know, I can feel you get all mushy-gushy. It's almost repulsive. Just wanted to hear you admit it.

V: Eat a dick, Johnny.

You arrive before the GIM and blend into the crowd.

V: Nothin’ like watching guys beat the shit out of each other to get your blood pumpin’, huh?

Vik: This is a real good matchup, V. This kid’s fresh, young talent.

V: You miss it, don’t you?

Before the fight begins, Vik shares a story about his time in the ring and coming in second in the Watson Boxing Grand Prix.

There’s some extra fun options in the dialogue, you can bet some eddies on who’s gonna win, or side with him. The fight ends, and you two head outside.

Since you’re already out in Pacifica, you head over to the boardwalk (where you would ride the roller coaster with Johnny) and he starts telling you about the last days of his boxing career and how he transitioned from the sport to being a ripperdoc.

You both share a sweet moment with each other, reminiscing about old times and talking about V’s future with the relic. This is where I would see Vik confessing how he feels about you, mentioning how grateful he is for Jackie introducing you to him.

The evening ends and Vik asks you to give him some time to try and dig up some footage from his storage and have you come over to watch. You can kiss him then wait another 24 in game hours before the last quest. Halfway through, he texts you and asks you what you’d like for dinner. You can opt for pizza or chinese.

I haven’t seen or read anything about how or where Vik lives. If I overlooked something, please let me know! But for the sake of the story, let’s say he does actually have his own place that’s now introduced in the game. Personally, I think he has a typical bachelor pad, like a really nice apartment. Not too far from his clinic either. He looks like he would just walk to work. Vik definitely has a lot of money, but he’s so humble I doubt he would choose to live lavishly. As mentioned in the beginning, he typically just “sleeps nights” ever since he was over “being a legend” so I’m guessing his lifestyle is very routine. He goes to work, goes home, sleep. Seems unlikely he has a place like the Peralez’s. It would probably be just the same as V’s but decorated to his taste.

The evening comes and you are over at his place. He’s dressed in just a white undershirt, no exo-glove. You get to know more about his family, how he grew up — scanning things around his place. Then he plays some footage of one of his fights for you, while you two have a conversation and share a beer. As you two sit on the couch, you get close, then have an opportunity to kiss him.

then this is where da sex happen hihihi (ノ・ω・)ノ

The next morning you wake up and you two have a heartfelt conversation about where this is going. He already knows your situation, so I would assume he is very accepting and supportive. And with Vik, he seems like the kind of guy who would still want to be in your life and keep the friendship the same way despite no longer being together romantically. So it’s official. He’s your man 🥵 !!11!1!

Like how River gives you the “fuck the police” tank top after sleeping with him, I think Vik would give you his Night City Devils t-shirt that provides you with a significant amount of armor or some kind of cyberware upgrade that makes you invulnerable for a brief moment while using your hands to fight enemies.

Note: I was thinking of Vik giving V his boxing glove necklace, but because it's part of his character's appearance in the game, I don't think we would be able to essentially "take it" from him - unless he gives you a replica as a keepsake. Which I think would also work.

If you successfully romance, during the rooftop scene near the end of Nocturne OP55N1 (despite Vik’s disposition of him telling you to take matters in your own hands and being a little closed off), you still have an option to reach out to him when Johnny advises you to call a loved one.

V: Hey, Vik. I just wanted to say, thanks for hanging with me, until the end.

Vik: Quit talking like it is, V. Just do what you need to do.

V: I mean, think of it. It’s like I’m heading into the last round of this whole thing.

Vik: Well, in that case.. remember—keep your hands up, guarded at all times. It ain’t over just yet.

V: Heh.. I can feel it, just a few more punches.

Vik: Now look at you - the new welterweight champ of Night City.

V: Thanks, coach.

Vik: Last piece of advice from the coach's corner. Just.. be careful, kid. Remember, I’m with you.

Okayyyy, soooo I’m not the biggest fan of how CDPR gave us two of the same endings (Path of Glory). The only difference is that Rogue’s life is spared. I would have assumed that not only would we get to keep Rogue around, things should have played a bit more differently for V if we took the route of going solo against the corpos. So let’s tweak it.

This specific ending; it should be after getting through Don’t Fear The Reaper where you single-handedly manage to rip through Arasaka by yourself. Johnny goes back to Alt & Rogue is still alive. Yes nobody dies!!!

(honestly this ending can apply to any love interest you choose)

Vik and V are now living together in a lavish penthouse, entertaining an upcoming merc to do their work for them (which is now the current POV of the player.) You were recruited by Rogue at the Afterlife, who told you to visit this couple for a real, preem job.

They give you some vague details about the gig and go on for a brief moment about what you will be doing and what you should expect. Vik emphasizes to you that it’s important you get what they need because it’s for his wife, V, as her life depends on it.

As Never Gonna Fade Away is playing in the background, they tell you to break into Arasaka HQ.

Then the game officially ends.

#cyberpunk 2077 #viktor vector #v/vik #let us romance the ripperdoc you cowards

[mikeshanlon]

i really enjoy the way young royals explores the theme of legacy and how detrimental it can be to have to live up to a legacy or be obsessed with reputation. (analysis and thoughts under the cut)

i think wilhelm resents the fact that he has to live up to the role of being in the royal family and yet is very afraid of ruining that legacy bc of all the pressure. before he was sent off to hillerska he went to a normal school and wanted normal people around him and was content with erik having to take on the responsibilities of crown prince. and when he does have to assume that role he says he can never be erik, that he’s always had to be compared to him and obviously doesn’t like that. but even before erik passed and he had to take on those duties he was afraid of fucking up the legacy of the crown, when he sees that sign in the hallway that says you are in charge of your own legacy after he holds hands with simon, his anxiety worsens. you can tell it’s been instilled in him for a long time that what is most important is the crown’s reputation rather than his own wants. in the scene where him and simon fight about alexander being caught, he obviously wants simon to stay, but he focuses on how him doing drugs will fuck up his family’s reputation if it gets leaked. as much as he cares for simon, his legacy and his duties are like this oppressive cloud hanging over him. 

i do think that wille cares for his family of course but to me it’s different that the sort of loyal unconditional care with simon and his sister/mom. erik and wille had unconditional love, erik understood how difficult being a prince in the public eye was, and wille obviously cared for him deeply and felt like he could to talk to him about issues. his relationship with the queen is much more strained, she wants a tailored, doctored representation of him in the media, he cannot be anxious and bite his nails, she makes all the decisions for him. family is important to wille partially because it has to be bc of how special his family is. he helps his family, he helps august pay his tuition, and then makes a point of disowning august after his betrayal as his new “brother”. but again, because of the royal status and expectations upon the family, that supersedes and colors all of their relationships with each other. it seems to be more a sense of “duty” than unconditional love. especially after erik’s death, wille always has to consider how the crown’s image will be impacted, even though he never wanted to have this responsibility, or even the responsibility of being the “regular” prince under erik. being a family unit that is under constant public scrutiny is going to strain relationships. the queen knows that the anxiety of fucking up his legacy will get to him, and she uses that to get wilhelm to back out of admitting it was him in the video and coming out. wilhelm has to choose between his own happiness and their reputation, is forced to think that denying it’s him in the video is the only way. he loves simon and wanted to live freely, but that pressure of legacy won out.

i don’t know if i think wille necessarily values the crown over his own personal happiness and relationships, like in the way maybe the queen does--i don’t think it comes from a place of “i’m lucky to be prince and owe my duty to the crown, so i do what i have to do to stay that way” (like how the queen said the crown is a privilege not a punishment), but from fear of destroying the legacy and his family. afterall, he still wanted to pursue a secret relationship with simon, i think if he fully valued the crown and uplifting legacy and fulfilling his duties he wouldn’t have tried that. he wouldn’t have made a point to tell simon he loves him. hopefully we get another season because i think with the iconic ending revolution rendition and him looking in the camera, which also parallels the shot of him being forced to apologize/go to hillerska, he is realizing that focusing on legacy is taking away what’s important to him, and he’s going to shake shit up.

august is definitely the most obsessed with legacy, wanting to carry on his father’s business, being persistent on befriending wilhelm and trying to social climb, wanting power and perfection with being prefect, rowing captain etcetera. he is so obsessed with perfection and reputation he gets addicted to drugs, he fucks with simon and makes him get stuff for parties he can’t afford because good parties will make him look better, he manipulates sara multiple times, he mostly wanted felice because of her nobility, he fucking films wilhelm and simon and OUTS him, his own cousin. he hates that wille has everything he wants but isn’t as interested in preserving and more importantly improving the legacy he’s inheriting. meanwhile august’s familial legacy is dwindling, and he holds on to the last bit of assets and names that he can.... v much sick and a weirdo that shows how harmful being obsessed with legacy is

the queen is of course v focused on legacy and it really breaks my heart and makes me angry that she doesn’t care about wilhelm’s happiness more than their reputation, and moreso doesn’t get august in trouble for literally leaking child p*rn of her kid for the sake of appearances?!?!?! like how is he even remotely trustworthy she is wrong for that! like i said earlier the obsession with legacy puts a strain on their mother/son relationship. she doesn’t even really say anything about wille’s sexuality or his relationship, and barely comforts him, mostly goes in with a plan she’s already concocted without him to fix everything. 

erik seemed to understand and accept his role as crown prince but obviously had issues with it as well, like when he makes the plan for him and wilhelm to run from the press, or when he tells wilhelm to enjoy himself while there aren’t so many eyes on him that care. erik shows someone who has more unconditional love and empathy but still has to focus on legacy and is much more inclined to continue his legacy, but we do see those glimpses over how even the most “ideal” attitude of preserving legacy causes issues.

felice is expected to live up to her mother’s legacy, of being an equestrian, of being the lucia, but she doesn’t want either of those things. her mother wants her to be thinner and straighten her hair, and find someone of nobility to be with. obviously she does find wilhelm attractive lol but i think the main reason she pursued him and definitely why she pursued august was because she was expected to social climb and have royal kids. felice feels the need to portray a false narrative of herself on social media to uphold a certain image of herself. it’s very fucked up that her mom wants those values instilled in her but i love that felice was putting up boundaries and pushing back against her mother and the narrative she’s supposed to live up to. her giving sara the role of lucia and focusing on supporting her friends more in the latter half of the season shows growth and i’m excited to see where her story goes. 

sara is interesting because she seems to want to reject the legacy of her family and being working class and to fit in with the elite of hillerska. sara hates micke, hates that simon contacted him because it’s bringing in this “shameful” and painful part of their past (which i mean is def fair). other than sara’s betrayal in 1.06, i think the scene where she tells her family that she wants to reside at hillerska really exemplifies where she’s at in her relation to legacy/class. after dining at hillerska and living amongst the elite she gets annoyed at eating around the TV, she blames her mother for not leaving micke sooner, she gets angry with simon for caring for her. she wants to lead her own life, be popular and wanted because people want her, not for pity (even though i think simon of course truly cares abt his sister she feels annoyed with his protection and care). felice says early on that she thinks sara doesn’t care what other’s think or having friends, and sara says she still wants friends though. i think sara’s biggest thing is she wants to belong, her and simon moved schools after she was bullied for being autistic so i think that definitely affected her even though she tries to act nonchalant about hillerska at first. we see sara’s longing to fit in in smaller ways at first, like her asking her mom for a better piece of her uniform because hers are “cheap” and already worn out. she gets annoyed at simon for chewing loudly, or her mother sitting casually at the table. as she gets closer to felice and madison and all the other students, the allure of the upper class and their lifestyle draws her in more. so much to the point where she gets very anxious and upset at the idea of her and simon leaving hillerska because he’s having his own crisis and doesn’t consider his pov. so much so that she effectively betrays simon and felice, the people she’s closest to, to make a deal (and make out lol) with august to room there and “be just like him”. personally i think sara’s attraction to august is mostly that allure of the elite and that he seemed to “desire” her when he kissed her because he was being a manipulative dickhead--again that want to fit in and be wanted. and  i think there is a really interesting angle of jealousy and competition in female friendships, even if it is really subtle or not intentionally insidious or anything, sara does slowly start to trying to assume all the roles/fashions/mannerisms of felice to live that life she wants. i do think felice and sara’s care for each other is genuine and one of my fave parts of the show, but i think a lot of people who experienced being a teen girl know how we are always pitted against each other even in our subconscious because of how society treats and values women.

simon seems to be the character that is least interested in upholding legacy and tradition or giving a fuck what anyone thinks (as omar said here lmao) and that makes him a really interesting foil to wilhelm. there could be something said about micke fearing that simon is following in his footsteps, but to me that plot more so reveals how the upper class (august) continually exploit the working class for their benefit, and the trappings of generational oppression. the other thing that can be said is simon signing up for private tutoring and rowing, but again i think that serves to further show that he is forced to “play” by the game of the elites because the school/society is corrupt, and also, that simon has further ambitions outside of where he’s at. he wants to get good grades because he wants to explore new places and avenues. to me simon’s biggest motivations are his passions, the things and people he loves--music, his family, wilhelm. he isn’t loyal to others just because he’s expected to be, or uphold a certain image but because he really cares. he doesn’t watch out for sara because that’s his expected role as her brother to do so, but because he cares. he wasn’t interested in knowing wilhelm because he’s a prince like everyone else, he makes it clear he thinks the royal family are privileged and exploitative, but he is interested because he saw the real wilhelm. he’s out and proud even though his elite classmates are more conservative, he doesn’t care about voicing his unpopular opinions, he has no problem walking away from august’s dickhead behavior or calling him out on his shit. simon doesn’t care if people don’t think of him in the best light. (the only exceptions ig are the drugs conflict and the video, though literally anyone would have a problem with that because it’s much deeper that public opinion and has ramifications and is deeply traumatic--but just adding that before someone is like “well actually!”) i also think it’s interesting that most of the songs simon sings has themes of pushing back against the societal norms, and being remembered in history, plus of course the revolution song motif, and how much those songs affect wilhelm, he seems to connect deeply, like he wishes he could do those things but simon is the one who gets to sing them and actually live them.

#young royals #the way this is 2k words lmfao #i do not expect ppl read to this but when the analytical worm starts gnawing on my rottin brain i must oblige

[theweasleysredhair]

CHLOE MY LOVE! congrats on 4.6k -- honestly not sure how you don't have a million more followers because your blog and your writing is freaking brilliant! so happy to have formed a genuine friendship with you :') brb getting emotional. anyway! for your event, could you write a little something with my love george with a few different prompts? is that allowed? 3 and 8 from angst, 10 from fluff? who's surprised, i'm all fluff, congrats again my darling you deserve it all x

thank you so so much angel!! 💕 of course i decided i had to do a fake dating drabble for you erica, i got v carried away with it too so hope you like a super long drabble that turned into practically a whole fic - enjoy! ❤️

theweasleysredhair’s 4.6k follower event!

~~

3. “I told you not to fall in love with me.”

8. “I can’t pretend anymore.”

10. “Because I love you.”

~~~

Character: George Weasley

Word Count: 1884

WARNING: there’s no ‘read more’ bc i’m on mobile and couldn’t get it to work hahaha i apologise

Taglist: @dreamer821 @gracemayhateyou @criminalyetminimal @firewhisky-kisses @obsessedwithrandomthings @angelinathebook @iprobablyshipit91 @potterverseimagine @slytherineheir @kpopgirlbtssvt @rexorangecouny @wand3ringr0s3 @ickle-ronniekins @sehunasbitch @cryingforcrystalpepsi @kashishwrites @girl-next-door-writes @susceptible-but-siriusexual @crissdanvers @besitos-41 @heart-of-tempered-steel @andineversawyoucoming @mytreec | message or send an ask to be added/removed!

Disclaimer: Gif isn’t mine, credit goes to whoever made it

~*~

PLEASE DO NOT REPOST MY WORK! REBLOGS ARE ABSOLUTELY FINE! <3

+ + + + +

“I need you to date me.”

In shock, you dropped too many of the porcupine quills into your potion, making the liquid turn a nasty shade of green and sizzle as it practically exploded across the table. You sighed frustratedly, grabbing your wand and cleaning up the potion before turning to the person who spoke - one half of the Weasley twins and one of your best friends, George Weasley - who apparently found your reaction extremely amusing.

“I beg your pardon?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest. The hint of a smile was still etched onto his face as he leaned forward, “I need you to date me.”

You felt yourself grow warm at the thought, “You’re joking, right?” “For once, I am not,” he shook his head, “I um, I told this girl I couldn’t go to the Yule Ball with her because I had a girlfriend who I’m going with instead. Except, I don’t have a girlfriend. So you can see my dilemma.”

“This may be a stupid question but... if you don’t have a girlfriend, why did you tell her you do?” You raised an eyebrow, half curious, half amused.

“I didn’t want to be rude and just tell her no because she was really sweet. So now I need to find someone to date me, and I thought of you,” he explained with a shrug, playing with some of the potion ingredients you’d left at the end of your table.

“There are so many other girls you could have-“

“I don’t want anyone else, I want you,” he said almost desperately, before sighing downheartedly, “C’mon, it wouldn’t be so bad, and it wouldn’t have to be for long! Just until the Yule Ball. It’s not like we’d have to pretend that much! I spend most of my free time with you as it is.”

“How do you know I don’t already have a date, huh?” You asked, beginning to start your potion all over again before Snape got the chance to scold you.

George’s face dropped and his jaw clenched, “What do you mean? Who asked you?”

“Well, no one. But my point was, what if they had?”

“Then you’d tell them you’ve been given a better option - me - and that they were never good enough for you. You know, the truth,” he nodded triumphantly, running a hand through his hair.

You shook your head at him with a smile, glancing up at him before your gaze travelled back to your potion.

“So what do you say?”

You pondered it for a moment, before replying, “Fine.”

George broke out into a large grin, wrapping his arms around you and very nearly swinging you around the room in excitement, “Darling, you are the best! I owe you big time!”

“Yes, you do. Now, do we have any rules we need to discuss?”

“Like what?”

“Like, I don’t know, a backstory, how we got together, how far we’d go with PDA - I vote not too far if I’m honest,” you said nervously, toying with the hem of your jumper.

“Well I vote the opposite, I think we should have lots of PDA constantly, all the time!”

“George,” you said warningly, though you couldn’t help the way your lips curved into a smile.

“Fine,” he dragged out the last syllable, “I can only think of one rule. A very important rule that I’m sure you might have a hard time not breaking.”

“Go on?”

“Whatever you do, don’t fall in love with me!” His eyes widened dramatically as he pointed at you. “No chance of that happening, don’t you worry,” you laughed, stirring the potion.

“Well that was rude of you,” he said in mock hurt, a hand on his heart as he pouted at you. You cracked a smile and shook your head, “Oh be quiet will you, and pass me the rest of those porcupine quills, I have to finish redoing this potion that you made me ruin.”

“Nagging me already,” George mumbled, “We really are a couple.”

***

You realised pretty quickly that you were wrong about there being no chance of falling for George. So very wrong. Turns out the chances of falling for George Weasley were 100%, because somewhere between being his friend and being more, you fell head over heels in love with him.

If you were honest with yourself, you’d had feelings for him before the whole fake-dating, but figured you’d mistaken them for feelings of strong friendship.

Now you knew - you didn’t want to be his friend, you wanted him to snog you against a wall as he whispered sweet nothings in your ear.

And all of this was because of one simple kiss. You hadn’t expected it, didn’t know it was going to happen. All you knew was that one minute you were walking down the hallway with George’s arm around your shoulder - not even for show, really, he just walked with you like that anyway - and the next, your back was against a pillar, your eyes widening as you stared up at George, feeling yourself growing warm.

“W-What’s going on?” You stammered out, heart pounding as you lost yourself in his brown eyes, suddenly getting the urge to run your hand through his ginger hair and pull him by his tie down into a kiss.

“She’s watching,” he murmured, nodding subtly down to the end of the hallway. You couldn’t see anyone, but took his word for it as you figured you were just overwhelmingly flustered from the proximity.

And suddenly you realised what position you were in: his hands either side of your head, trapping you between his chest and the pillar, your own chest barely an inch away from him and his legs brushing against your own.

Your breath hitched in your mouth, noticing how his eyes flickered from your eyes down to your mouth before moving back up again. Your lips parted a little, chin tilting ever-so-slightly upwards as you waited to see what he’d do.

“You’re so beautiful, you know that?” He murmured, and suddenly his lips were on yours, pulling you into a desperate kiss, him cupping your cheek to bring you closer, his other hand sliding down the pillar to grab your waist.

This wasn’t a kiss from someone who was just a friend. This was a kiss that made your toes curl, set your skin on fire and made you want more - so much more.

And in that moment you realised you loved him. You didn’t want to go back to being George’s friend, not when you knew how his lips felt against yours, how his hands felt holding your waist.

He’d finally pulled away for air, still pressing shorter kisses to your lips as you both breathed heavily, and you dragged a hand through his hair, just how you’d imagined.

You knew, right then, that you were in love with him. All of a sudden, and very very full on.

After that, you suddenly noticed and admired everything about him, from the way he laughed to the way he bit his lip as he glanced your way.

And the thought of breaking this whole dating thing off - something that you’d both planned to happen the day after the Yule Ball - made you feel sick to your stomach. The thought of never kissing him again made you want to scream.

You couldn’t imagine going back to being friends. Not when you’d had a taster of what it was like to be George Weasley’s girlfriend.

You argued with yourself, one half of you wanting to end it with him now in order to save yourself further heartbreak, and the other half wanting to continue for as long as possible. It was all you could think about, from the moment you woke up in the morning to the moment you went to sleep at night. And you decided you couldn’t keep going like this, it wasn’t fair to you.

You couldn’t keep pretending you weren’t in love with the ginger boy.

And so, when you found yourself sat in his common room late one night two weeks after that first fateful kiss, sharing one of the red plush couches with him, his leg pressed next to yours and your heart racing, the rest of the students already in their dorms, you decided to be honest with him.

“George?”

“Yes?” George waited for your reply, however at the silence, he looked up curiously, finding you chewing on your lip in thought.

“Are you okay, love?” He asked, concern seeping into his voice as he looked at you, noticing how restless you appeared, how lost in thought.

“I um.. yes? I mean no,” you frowned, “I mean- I don’t know.”

He shifted, his body tilting towards yours and he grabbed your hands in his, bringing them up to his lips so he could press a kiss to you knuckles, “What’s wrong, what’s going on?”

“I can’t pretend anymore, Georgie,” you whispered, afraid if you spoke any louder your voice would fail you.

“What do you mean, you can’t pretend? You’re scaring me, princess, please tell me what’s going on in that mind of yours,” he frowned, hating the idea of anything even remotely bothering you.

“I can’t pretend to be your girlfriend anymore.”

And suddenly George felt like he’d been winded, a pain in his chest he could only liken to heartbreak, if he was to be so dramatic.

“What?” His voice was small, especially in the silent room. He wanted to know why. Had he done something wrong? Made you feel uncomfortable at one point? He’d hate himself if he had.

“I can’t pretend because- because I fell in love with you,” you breathed out, lips trembling as you stared at your clasped hands, “This isn’t pretend for me anymore, this is real! And it’s scary, and I don’t know what to do about it.”

There was a silence and you couldn’t bring yourself to look up at him, not wanting to see the look on his face as he tried to come up with, you presumed, a way to reject you.

“You wanna know why I asked you to be my fake girlfriend?” He asked suddenly, squeezing your hands and waiting for you to nod slightly at him, before continuing, “Because I wanted a reason to ask you to the Yule Ball without being rejected. Because I wanted to spend even more time with you, to have a glimpse at what it would be like to date you. Because-because I love you.”

Your felt your heart skip a beat as you finally looked up at him, meeting his eyes as he smiled at you.

“You love me?” You whispered.

“Always have, I reckon.”

You couldn’t help the grin that spread across your face as you allowed him to pull you closer to him, “Well I guess it’s definitely a good job I fell for you, huh?”

He grinned cheekily, biting his lip as he replied jokingly, “Well, I don’t know really, I mean, I thought I told you not to fall in love with me.”

“Yeah, well,” you spoke, letting a soft smile creep onto your face,

“As it turns out, I just couldn’t help myself.”

#4.6k follower drabble event #george weasley #george x reader #george weasley x reader #george weasley imagine #george weasley imagines #weasley twins #weasley twins imagine #weasley twins imagines #hp #harry potter #all queue have to do is follow the spiders

[kanmom51]

The members just fueled the sheep today by screaming when Tae and JK touched. What was that? Why did they feel that was cute to do? That was strange and odd, unless TK are dating. Either way, it was enough fuel to send them over the edge and now the are 100% convinced they're real and the members support them. Don't even get me started on the hate JM got today, accusing him of purposely ruining a TK moment and inserting himself. I no longer think Jikook are real after today cause of the members.

Ask 2/ I find the members screams when TK touched today pretty sus and Jimin's face, although he smiled, seems he was caught off guard and Tae sticking his tongue out to JK before it happened. If Jikook are dating, I feel that was pretty disrespectful. For members to encourage a flirty moment between two other members, if that said member is already in a relationship. Its the first time I have ever wondered about TK and that makes me feel so bad. Not because I have a problem with it, but because of JM.

Ask 3/ Whoever said Jinmin are dating are probably right. After today, there is no way Jikook are dating. The member would not yell and cheer on Tae/kook like that if they were in a relationship with someone else. Jin photobombed JM's selfie with a heart. And JM is struggling with TK lately and it shows. I think Jikook were very much dating and real, but this past year its not been the same. Saying JM is sexy does not equal dating, they all that. However JM getting pissy over TK says a lot. Jealous ex.

Ask 4/ People think something isn't off with Jikook, when JM has shown lately he is uncomfortable with Tae and JK getting close. At Muster JK puts his arm around Tae and JM purposely gets between them. Today Tae gets a little too close to JK and JM purposely makes a moment with Tae. JM is never jealous over JK unless Tae is involved. So that tells me JM is dating either JK or Tae and TK are getting a little to real for JM's liking. I personally don't think JM is dating JK anymore. I think it's Tae.

So, as you can see I have received a few asks on this subject. The new PTD dance practice clip released yesterday.

Let's start by seeing exactly what this 'moment' everyone is screaming about between JK&Tae that the other members were supposedly going crazy about.

First off, all the members seem to be really having a good time here. It seems like everyone is in a good mood and there are plenty of interactions between the members that have gone unnoticed, because everyone's eyes are on Vminkook.

Second, this is a 3 min. clip of a dance practice. This is most likely a one shot clip (not edited), but, and here is the big but, this isn't a one time practice. Meaning, the members weren't flown into the dance studio to do this one take, shoot it and leave. The members arrived at the studio, interacted, most likely rehearsed the dance several times before shooting this clip, if this was the first take, because it is also likely that there were a few takes of which they chose the one to upload.

What is the importance of this long winded explanation?

To explain that the members do not perform in a vacuum. That the interactions between them during these clips are not detached from everything that was going on prior to this take.

And again, why is this important?

Because when you look at that interaction between Tae&JK it's really absolutely NOTHING what so ever.

This is the point the cheers come in.

Now, as I see it those cheers can be one of two things:

Either something went on prior to this shot, maybe in the rehearsal or a previous shot that Tae putting his hand on JK's shoulder caused this reaction. Idk, maybe something they talked about or something one of those three did before, who knows.

Or, the members that are pretty hyped up, as I mentioned, they seem to be having a great time, were hyping up and enjoying this part of the choreo, the makne line doing their thing.

Either explanations are possible.

This isn't Tae being flirty. As a matter of fact, at this point neither Tae nor JK are being flirty.

JM, though, he is sure enjoying his view of JK.

As for JM's hand, that was a bit of an oopsy there, which he pretty much immediately fixed. No, he wasn't going for the bundle, he was going for the hip.

This isn't our first dance practice rodeo. We know they can go rogue during these practices, letting go, enjoying themselves, and this is what we have here too.

No dramas, no intrigues, nothing of that sort.

I will say this for the millionth time. BTS are human beings. I can't believe I actually spilled the beans here. Yes, they are people like you and me, well maybe not exactly like you and me, seeing they are multimillionaire idols, but you get the idea.

They are not fictional characters in a novel or a Telenovela or K-drama. These are real human beings with real human being feelings. And why do I have to keep repeating this?

Well, it seems some fans think that being in a band and famous makes you out to be promiscuous or able to change your partner/boyfriend like a pair of socks. Or that within a band of 7 members if there would be such change of guard (meaning them changing partners around) that they would continue to be on such good terms with each other or be able to even look at each other, let alone keep on working for so many years with each other.

If Vminkook were in this real K-drama love triangle there would be soooo many behaviours that would have to be explained away and that don't make any kind of sense.

Let's start by them all being friends and on good terms. In what universe would this be if two members in this triangle were fighting over the heart of the third? Either V & JK fighting for JM's heart or JK&JM fighting for V's heart or JM&V fighting for JK's heart?

Then we have Vmin's relationship. Declared soulmates. How would that fit in to this mess, especially if JM&V are supposedly after JK? Wouldn't there be a rivalry here, not a close intimate friendship?

And JK&JM being close and inseparable, how does that fit into the story line?

JM practically pushing JK to sit down and talk with V ITS - how does that fit in?

Them all being cheery, happy, smiley, lovey dovey with each other. How does that fit in?

And there is so much more there that just doesn't make sense if you are into this type of storyline.

If things have changed recently, as some of the asks claim. If JM & JK are over and now it's the time of JK & Tae, how is it that the dynamics between these three hasn't changed? That JM is still all smiley and happy towards Tae, who has supposedly hooked up with his ex? The same Tae that JM pushed JK to talk to during ITS?

You know, even if couples split up, there is residue. There are feelings left, good or bad (longing or anger or hate or sadness). There is never indifference, especially a long term relationship ending. So, if that is the case, if the couple has split, if a new relationship is budding, how is that one member in that triangle, be it JK or JM, so indifferent, accepting, happy & laughing and overall ok with what is going on?

When a long term relationship ends do you think moving on is something you do immediately? Especially with one of your ex's best friends?

JM, JK and Tae are not plastic characters in a soap opera. This isn't Brook or Ridge or Taylor that have been married and divorced so many times I lose count, moving back and forth between those relationships. That isn't real life. And JK/JM/Tae are real people living real lives.

So, believe what you may, that Taekook are real, or that Vmin are real or Jikook are real (you know where I stand on that). But don't flip flop between them or don't make up these illogical theories about them moving in between relationships. Beyond it being fictional it is disrespectful to all three of them.

This sums up this topic for now.  Any other asks sent about this clip or change in JM’s behaviour or Jikook breakup etc. will go unanswered.

#ask #anon #Jikook #Kookmin #PTD dance practice