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#families can suck
samthemarvelfan · 14 days ago
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Tomorrow is Thanksgiving!
This holiday in particular can be very difficult for a lot of people. Being forced to “interact” with family who may not share your outlooks or beliefs can be very stressful and toxic.
If you guys need a safe space to vent or reflect or simply come for some positivity, my asks/dms are always open to you. I promise I’ll do my best to brighten your day! ❤️
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cowboyjen68 · 2 years ago
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hey jen, just wondering if you have advice for a closeted gay girl who is home from college for the holidays. my family is conservative and religious and not entirely gay friendly. i tend to dress a lot more androgynously these days than i did in the past, and i have lots of gay friends in college and i’ve gotten comments/questions from my mom and sister joking around about me being gay. i can’t come out for safety reasons but i’m going crazy being home and having to hide. holidays are hard ):
I was you in 1986 to 1991. Every year I just kept quiet. I really wanted to tell my sister because she would be okay with it, but she would also not be quiet about it so she was one of the last people I told after graduation.If you are old enough, I suggest stopping at the gay bar in town during the day.. not necessarily at night. Gay energy can be a boon to your health. You need to be around your “people”. It sounds silly but gay bars saved me as a young lesbian. IF you are under age see if there are places like LGBT friendly book stores with readings over the holiday.  OR try other places that might be more progressive, like coffee shops  or theatre venues. Even if you attend and are not “out”,  being with others, just taking in the LGBT vibe can bolster your resolve and help you tough it out. 
Don’t change your dress for the comfort of your family.. there is a chance they know you are a lesbian and this is their way of trying to get you to come out.. just let them have at it and get out of the house a little bit to recharge your batteries. 
If there is a local humane society, or rescue, ask them if they need volunteers to walk dogs or socialize cats. Not only can hanging with the animals relax you, those places tend to attract lesbians. It is worth a phone call and a few hours of you time and the dogs will appreciate it.
Good luck.. let me know how you did and that you are safely back in college after break
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trustme3-13 · 3 years ago
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Thanksgiving is tomorrow...
And while I'm thankful my family does not get annoying about much of anything, I know that there are many out there who are not so lucky. So if you are stuck at home with your family on Thanksgiving and have no way to physically be away from them and you need somebody to talk to or need someone to lean on, I'm your gal. Feel free to PM me, I'm all ears for ya.
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natasyafilippovna · a month ago
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every post on here about siblings gets taken over by the same “real siblings are mean to each other all the time lol” thing and like maybe that is actual sibling culture for most of you but like. constantly constantly saying “sibling relationships are supposed to be mean” is alienating for survivors of sibling abuse. i dont care if its something you assume everyone understands and relates to, for a lot of people “mean” sibling relationships are horrific, and people on here continually insisting that its actually the norm and shutting down every single conversation about siblings or sibling relationships in media with “lol well me and my siblings beat the shit out of each other” is just fucking annoying.
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ablednt · 27 days ago
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Okay but it's always so wild to me how much food plays a huge factor in class disparity in the US in ways it just doesn't in many European countries. Like a lot of other countries don't have this concept of like "health food" being super expensive and treated like a luxury.
Non-Americans love to mock us for eating super processed foods but it's genuinely really fucking difficult to find fresh fruits, vegetables, etc. that aren't expensive enough that you can't just regularly buy them in variety. I was genuinely shocked that most of my friends from europe get their usual bread from bakeries and not the pre sliced/processed ones we usually see here.
And like when you look at the prices for fresher stuff it's like "what do you mean this isn't that bad" but you have to take into account the shelf life. Processed foods last much longer so you only need to buy more every few weeks depending on how many people are eating something, whereas you need to replace fresh food after a few days. You also need to take into account transportation because the US is designed for cars not for public transportation or foot traffic and when people who can drive are working full hours going to the store every few days just isn't an option.
And sometimes (a lot of the time) you're too tired to cook after working so long and you get takeout instead.
And that's not even getting into food deserts (places where there's no grocery stores within an accessible distance but there are fast food places, this is an engineered problem and it's why many impoverished people eat "too much fast food")
Like my family's always been pretty fortunate because we've never been on food stamps and growing up we never had to go hungry but fresh food was still seen as a big luxury and we'd only buy a little here and there moat of the time we just eat processed foods because it's just kind of what poor people are allowed to eat here.
And a lot of people in the US have gastrointestinal issues and I think the way "healthfood" is gatekept is a huge part of it. Eventually I know if I ever get an actual income that I'm probably going to have to give up most of the foods I eat now because gluten free things are way more expensive because it's marketed as a fad diet rich people go on and not as an allergy.
I'm sure this isn't entirely linked to the US but it's just so weird to me when this kinda unspoken class signifier is so different in other countries
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pocketramblr · 12 days ago
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Wsit, wait imagine. Due to fuckery, Pops finds Tenko and AFO finds little Kai
- AfO let Tenko wander around a bit before his staged rescue, so he kinda... Loses him a bit. Then he finds Kai, and squints. He looks older than AfO remembers the Shimura brat being, but people around him seem to age so fast these days. To be sure, he asks, "Is that blood from your own family?" Little Kai nods and admits he killed them. AfO thinks that the odds of two filthy selfmade orphan boys wandering around the city would be tiny, so he scoops up Kai and renames him Tomura
- Meanwhile, the other little filthy selfmade orphan boy wandering the city is scooped up by Pops and brought home to meet his new big sister. Tenko tells the story of what happened to the Shimura's, afraid of repeating Hana and Kotaro's deaths, and Pops is just like "well ok here's gloves that cover one finger, how about you see this as a second chance to make up for that accident? You be a good family member and we'll help you learn control and discipline and be a good family to you." And Tenko-Chisaki is like "ok" because he is five.
- AfO doesn't remember the quirk he gave Shimura to be so quickly destructive, watching Kai-Shiggy destroy with a single finger, but hey, he's got a lot of quirks to keep track of. And the kid is obsessively clean, even breaks out in hives at the thought of dirtiness. AfO thinks about how his younger brother didn't help with chores or do anything to keep himself clean and healthy, and decides to take it as a win. Three years later when Kai-S learns he can also reconstruct things, AfO gets insanely jealous instead and wants the Overhaul quirk, but the Doctor warns him it's too late to massively rewrite memory again, and besides, he can get the quirk when he takes Kai-S's body. AfO isn't patient and sulks, but agrees.
- Rather than being giving Kurogiri, since Kai-S is clean and manages on his own, he gets more training with the Doctor than canon Tomura did, and is rather a quick study. He finds it disgusting, but he'll do anything Sensei asks- especially once the Doctor whispers his theories of quirk singularity, that only AfO can somehow save them from that.
-Tenko-C, likewise, is entirely devoted to Pops. Pops didn't mean "Family" family when he said what he said, but as soon as Tenko learned there was a crime aspect, he jumped in to help his new dad and defend him. He adored all the yakuza style teaching, and imagined what would have happened if his first family had a neighborhood community that watched out for each other like this, instead of depending on heroes. He is fine with not using his quirk in combat, for he doesn't want to add to the hero-villain conflict that destroyed the traditional ways of his new family. But he does get into fights at school lol and can't believe his big sister would just leave the family like that. When she comes back to dump Eri on them and run, Tenko-C has flashbacks to killing Kotaro and breaks down, thinking he cursed his new family to repeat what happened, but then Pops tells him to get a grip and focus on being a good uncle to Eri, which he awkwardly attempts, and help train her quirk, which he's actually pretty good at! For a emotional 17 year old... Pops says he should go into teaching or quirk counseling, which Tenko gasps at because no, obviously he's supposed to be a criminal heir and drug ring runner! Pops tries to explain he can be both but is ignored.
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sleeping-lilies · 8 months ago
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did i do this right?
also bonus:
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#i was really conflicted on where to put cass and was about to put her in treason but she wouldn’t fit so i just went with my first thought#technically jason should be in all of the above but it is my civic duty to emphasize that this boy has never paid taxes in his life#he’s dead guys he’s dead he’s just living on earth rent free#i didn’t wanna put dami in murder because that’s too obvious but he didn’t fit anywhere else so i just chose a cute photo to contrast#for giggles of course#duke i-jumped-off-a-bridge-to-escape-the-cops thomas#and dick i-canonically-said-the-government-can-kiss-my-ass grayson have definitely committed treason#missed opportunity for “suck my dick” but beggars can’t be choosers#steph just radiates arson energy i’m sorry i can’t explain#i think everyone else is pretty obvious especially alfie#this man has done everything in life so now he’s the bats’ butler as a side quest#i literally put selina here so she could fill the theft box i didn’t have her here at first#to be fair anyone can be in treason and fraud it’s like family bonding for these assholes#ras al ghul’s crusty ass doesn’t deserve to be on here but it came to me at 3AM and i couldn’t stop cackling so now you all have to suffer#even the joker canonically pays his taxes do better ras ur embarrassing us all#dick grayson#tim drake#barbara gordon#bruce wayne#alfred pennyworth#jason todd#cassandra cain#duke thomas#selina kyle#stephanie brown#damian wayne#dc comics#batfam#ras al ghul#mine
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foulserpent · a month ago
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i have zero shooting experience so the first time i actually hit the clay pigeon it was really jarring.. you cant really see the bullet so even tho you kno whats happening, the cause and effect isnt instinctively apparent. so it feels kinda like you psychokinetically explode that little frisbee
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moononastring · 2 months ago
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Lucien Vanserra Week | Day 6
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Family Ties
Though begrudgingly at first, Eris taught Lucien almost everything he knew in his youth. That included riding horses, archery, sword fighting, court mannerism, and of course...how to talk to the admirers. 😏
They both knew their mother suffered the wrath of Beron often so if there was one thing they always agreed on, they never fought in front of her.
Lucien inhaled books and loved learning in his youth. He always told his mother all the interesting things he learned that day. She loved to listen to her little walking encyclopedia. It reminded her of someone else she loved and how Lucien not only had similar features to her love, but a similar brain as well.
LOA loved dressing Lucien in gold. For a very specific reason.
Once they start building a good relationship, Helion tries to get Lucien to match with him and Lucien just laughs for like, 10 minutes straight before calmly stating, "No."
He ends up wearing the matching togas and jewelry. His dad has good taste 😌
Lucien initiates family dinners. As much as he gets grossed out by his parents being overly affectionate in front of him, he has a home and people he loves that he wants to spend time with. Elain obviously joins once they begin courting and Eris always drops in to take his job as an annoying stepson very seriously. Lucien loves it.
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dykesymmetry · a month ago
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ok yes i have the self awareness to say doctor who fans are annoying but the ppl who are weirdly committed to saying how much it sucks at any opportunity are significantly more annoying
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neekssunshine · 3 months ago
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There’s absolutely nothing wrong with liking villain characters, wanting to see more of them, expressing how well their actions are thought out, etc. etc. Villains as characters should get a lot of love! REALLY GOOD villains, even, are LIKED genuinely- not just because they’re written well but because of how they act. You liking them while knowing the things they’re doing are horrid is exactly how bad people show up in the real world.
Hand of Guidance, unarguably, is villain or somewhere around there. Villain-adjacent. If not a major or minor villain, then just an evil character. The fact that lots people like her means Griffin did an excellent job portraying a corrupted religious leader or cult leader. Everyone thinks they’re “”too smart”” for cults and you absolutely absolutely are not. People think they’re “”too smart”” to get trapped in an abuse cycle and you aren’t!! I doubt that Guidance will “break” (or REALLY hope she doesn’t often) or snap or say anything outright vile because a lot of real life talented manipulators (ESPECIALLY charismatic leaders) don’t often! It’s all little things. Not being able to keep from touching Devo, constantly putting down his faith, the whole speech about how they couldn’t accept him back was so backhanded and YET! The vibe was so gentle-mom like. And that’s a GREAT villain. You know she’s evil and yet, people can’t help but like her. Griffin always does such great characterization and I’m so excited.
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