#first of all i think i've been listening to more music by men this year which is incredible

[sciderman]

I won't lie, there's a centrain magic to reading comics, maybe it's because you have more control over the direction, speed, voices and music when reading over watching something, maybe it's how creative people can get with panel lay-outs, maybe it's all of those things along with the different art styles and way people express themselves through their comic runs, maybe it's the fact there's SO many of them and so many different runs, AUs, versions, solo-stories and characters that while not every comics is for everyone, there's A comics for everyone.

And it's something that only animation can come close to capturing, occasionaly some games because they can give us amazing set pieces and action and stylization through gameplay. But to me live action movies just miss the mark exept a few and even then i just enjoy the comics more.

I think one big thing for me is the narration, because it helps me relate to characters as someone who's thoughts are pretty loud and narration-like, and the fact it's ME who decides how i make the characters sound and talk rather than having to listen to someone else voice the character in a way that i feel isn't "right".

So i'd say personaly it's comics>>books (i like books, and i LOVE fanfics but the visual part stimulates my brain more) >>>animation>games>live action

i agree wholeheartedly! i don't know, i'm kind of in love with the comic medium. but i love writing, also. i just - i really don't like the passivity of animation and television - i need a lot more stimulation than that to get my brain working. i like all the brain work you have to do when you're reading words. and i love the challenge of pulling off "comedic timing" when you don't actually HAVE the dimension of time in your medium exactly - so you have to work with panelling, and you have to work with spacing in your writing - and it's just so sexy and more active for the brain. like you're inventing a language.

comedy writing in comics is so, so fulfilling because you're a comedian, but your format is visual. you need to rely on visual language to carry it. and jokes are all about expectation and subversion and timing. a joke can fall so flat if that timing is off. and - i don't know, i'm obsessed with comics, as if they're some kind of form of visual poetry. it's taken for granted, i think. it's taken for granted.

i think you become more restricted the more dimensions you introduce - so - writing is entirely free. you can do WHATEVER you want, all by yourself, without needing to rely on the quality of your art software or the actors you have at your disposal or anything - you can conjure any visual you like. comics - more challenging, you're limited by your artistic ability but again - you're not restricted by voice cast - god, i love being able to conjure any voice at all in my head for the boys. i think if i was restricted by voice actors i'd have to write them differently, et cetera et cetera... i'd be dealing with VAs and saying "actually. your delivery is all wrong. i have to rewrite the joke." - i'm so particular about these things, you have no idea.

i remember the first time i watched the deadpool movie after having read the original script over and over YEARS prior and having heard it play out in my head in the most hilarious of ways and then. hearing ryan's delivery of those jokes and thinking "oh. it's not that funny actually."

sorry ryan. it might've been funnier if i hadn't read the script already and hadn't already had the movie play out in my brain way funnier than how you did it. sorry. my brain is a better cinema.

something i also love about print vs film - i've had this problem with a lot of adaptations - i despise film adaptations of books i love, just because - something is so sullied about having so many hands in the pot. actors. camera men. producers. directors. all these people - when - what i loved about the book was feeling close to the author. it's just me and him. we're together, intimately. and all of that intimacy gets lost when you know there's a huge film crew behind it.

kind of weird. i love reading a book and just, giggling over the pages, like it's a joke between me and the author. i don't know, i'm a weird little saddo who craves intimacy. so i like the intimacy of it being a one-man show. i love things where i can feel close to the creator. i hope that's why people like my things too. and it's why i like my things. i sometimes think "ouugh. why can't i work for marvel" but i think about how - i'm lucky i get to create what i want to create without having to compromise or answer to editorial. and what i create can always be unapologetically me. and that means more. that means so much more.

#sci speaks #sorry marvel you'd ruin me. #im cringe and i am free

[godofsmallthings]

@andisitover tagged me to share my albums of the year! (i'm going with nine faves that came out this year & not including rerecords/reissues/deluxe versions where the og album didn't come out this year)

i tag anyone who wants to do it (seriously pls do it and tag me, i would love to see your faves!!!!!)

#okay this is super interesting to look at #first of all i think i've been listening to more music by men this year which is incredible #i also feel like i didn't really hit a stride of being excited by new music until like july hence most of these being newer #it was also a really single/song-centric listening year for me #i felt conflicted abt adding the record and ocean blvd bc i am more attached to individual songs vs. the whole album #and there were probably 2-3 more that could've been swapped out for those (paramore/troye sivan/arlo parks) #also 4/9 being by artists of color is nice. would still like to be better about that though #ALSO (last thing i prommy) #i feel compelled to say that a lot of my favorite albums this year didn't come out in 2023 #i just didn't listen to tons of new music this year/discover too many new artists #which isn't really good/bad but i would like to do more of that next year :) #actually i might make a second post of all of those #aoty just makes me think of grammy category which makes me think of albums that came out this year ykwim? #omg also i just rearranged them so each row is in like vague ranking order (top = faves) in case ur curious #tagged #vi is typing...

[hyperactively-me]

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE LISTEN TO ME PLEASE

141 Task Force + Ale and Kö with a ballerina civilian wife. THEN!!! (NO PLEASE THIS IS SO CUTE LISTEN) They came back from a mission without warning and they go to a presentation bcse they never actually saw one AND!!!! Their wife almost pass out in the middle of the stage by seeing them there (they look at her all in love and proud UGHHH).

THIS IS HELLA CUTE BYE-

BESTIE I'M LISTENING. LOUD AND CLEAR. this is so cute omg!!! also, i've never written for anyone other than ghost, and i don't have the confidence to write for anyone other than simon, so please don't be upset but i will be writing this only for ghost. (although, i genuinely want to get some practice in writing for all the other COD men, which i am trying to somewhat do through my king!ghost au, i just don't wanna fuck up their characters too badly haha. if at any point i decide to write for the others, i will totally come back to this prompt!). also, i wanted to make this more into a oneshot rather than blurb/headcanons soooo! yeah!

As the soft notes of The Sleeping Beauty Suite filled the dimly lit theater, you stood backstage, your heart racing. You sat on a spare box, fastening your pointe shoes on securely. The spotlight beckoned, the hushed whispers of the audience creating a palpable tension in the stiff air. The curtains were about to rise, and you were the prima ballerina. As you finished fastening your pointe shoes, you stood, brushing out your tutu. The weight of anticipation bore down on you, but you stood tall, chin up, back straight. You had practiced this routine a hundred times. It was just another night, another ballet. Nothing you weren’t used to. 

Except it wasn’t. 

You didn’t know your husband had just slipped in through the doors. He was still in his uniform, except for his mask and tactical gear. He never wore the mask around you. 

You had no idea that tonight would be different. All you knew was that Simon was not supposed to come back home for another three weeks. He had been deployed for three long months now. Your heart ached just thinking about how long you’ve been without him, the loneliness and longing that came with being a military spouse weighing heavy on you. 

The sudden sound of the orchestra snapped you out of your daydream, and the curtain began its ascent. Your delicate tutu billowed around you as you took your first step onto the stage, your body moving with the grace and precision that only years of training could produce.

But then, in the midst of your pirouettes and arabesques, something caught your eye in the sea of dimly lit faces. A figure, tall and strong, standing in the back of the theater. The world around you blurred as your heart leapt into your throat. It couldn't be.

Simon.

The shock of seeing him in the audience was enough to make you falter, to disrupt the airy balance of your performance. You stumble over your feet slightly, your knees shaky from the sudden interruption. 

You recover as best you can, continuing to dance. Your eyes locked onto his, you wanted to cry. He was home early. And he was here to watch you. His expression was one of awe and pride, like a lovesick puppy gazing at his beautiful wife.

You pranced and twirled, lost in the music and the whirlwind of emotions coursing through you. It was as if the two of you were the only people in the world, the stage your sanctuary.

As the final notes of the music filled the theater, you struck your final pose, your breath ragged, your body trembling. The audience erupted into applause, their adoration washing over you like a warm embrace. But your eyes remained locked with Simon's, who was clapping with ferocious fever. His eyes never left yours. You flash him a teary, wet smile.

As soon as the curtains closed, you fell from your pose, taking in a ragged breath. 

Your fellow ballerinas had come up to congratulate you on a beautiful performance, but all you could do was say a rushed “thank you” before you were running through the backstage area. The backstage was a labyrinth of bustling dancers, stagehands, and dimly lit corridors. Your heart raced as you rushed to find a way out into the audience to reach Simon. The echoes of applause still reverberated through the walls, but all that mattered now was him.

Finally, you burst through a side door that led to the theater’s lobby. And there he was, waiting for you, his eyes shining with unbridled love and pride. His dark uniform was a stark contrast to the delicate pink of your ballet attire.

Without a word, you threw yourself into his arms, and he caught you, lifting you off your feet. The world around you ceased to exist as you held each other, tears of joy streaming down your face. His calloused hands wrap around you, squeezing you tight against him. 

“I can’t believe you’re here,” you whisper into his ear, your watery voice filled with pure happiness. 

“I missed you so much, love.” Simon placed you gently back on your feet, his hands cradling your face with care, wiping away your tears. 

“I missed you, Si,” you take in a shaky breath. “So much.”

“I– I can’t believe you’re here, how did you know?”

“I would never miss my wife’s performance, now would I?” 

A mixture of laughter and tears escaped your lips as you leaned in to kiss him, a deep and passionate kiss. It felt like a dream come true that he was here, watching you perform. It had been ages since he was last able to come to one of your performances, and his support meant the world and more to you. You pull away from the kiss, shoving your face into his neck.

“I’m so proud of you,” he whispered, his voice reverberating in your eardrums. “You looked beautiful, look beautiful.” 

You pull back, looking at him with a huge smile, rubbing his back gently. "Thank you, Si."

He pulls you back into a tight embrace, wrapping you in his warmth and burly arms. More tears welled up in your eyes, and you clung to him, feeling the weight of the months apart melt away.

His words warmed your heart. You rested your head against his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. The two of you held each other close, savoring the moment as long as you could.

#*ੈ✩ simon “ghost” riley #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x you #simon ghost x reader #simon riley x you #simon ghost riley x you #simon “ghost” riley x reader #simon “ghost” riley x you #hyperactivelyme #hyperactivelyme requests

[bettyshoweduptotheparty]

Midnights is defined by duality: The story of an unreliable narrator and performance art (Part 1)

One year on, I think I've finally figured out what midnights is about. And it might surprise you.

The midnights album has just celebrated its first anniversary. And having listened to these songs for the last 12 months, staying up late to watch live streams of the Eras tour, and at times being unable to escape news about Taylor on every medium, I finally have an idea that makes all of this make sense: This is Taylor's duality era. And she wants us to notice. Join me on the ride if you want to know more :)

I made a post a few weeks ago about how the Midnights aesthetic has the ‘two Taylors’ duology: Private vs public, which is the lead theme that carries over into the music and most recently also into her public image. Midnights had a mismatched visual to it from the very beginning with the depressed 70s look (announcement photo and vinyl covers) and the glamourous midnight blue (cover image and public appearances).

The two Taylors in the Anti Hero mv really drove home the message for me that this album is about two versions of the same story, and Taylor is the writer and narrator. And while I'm sure that these two versions have existed for a lot longer than the midnights era, they have not previously been so prominently next to each other. In fact, the very point of having the public narrative, is to keep Taylor's private life out of the public eye. She has never shied away from providing the 'stories' that her fans want to see in order to relate to her music, and as the girl that made her fame with songs about heartbreak and fairytale princes, that usually meant being seen with a man that these songs could be attributed to. And she made sure people would make the connection, be it with scarves that change ownership, or foxes on shirts:

(Btw you can't deny how effective this was, with just a few photos she managed to hang an entire album on each of these men!)

So, acting is not new to Taylor. In addition to appearing in a few feature films and TV shows since 2010, she's done this public performance for well over a decade now. And she has been vocal in recent years about her intention to go into filmmaking, so we know she's able to tell stories in multiple ways. She's a storyteller first and foremost, maybe the best of our generation. But is she a reliable narrator?

What does 'unreliable narrator' mean?

A story told by a so-called unreliable narrator, is usually a first person narration, where it turns out that the person telling the story was either lying or in some other way unable to give a truthful account of events (e.g. hallucinating or dreaming). That usually means that the audience is left with having to interpret for themselves what really happened and what was real or not real. Famous examples of this kind of storytelling are the 2010 psycho thriller 'Black Swan' with Natalie Portman, or the YA novel 'We were liars' by E. Lockhart. If you like stories that leave you guessing, check those out ;)

So, why is Taylor an unreliable narrator? For those fans that have paid attention to her lyrics, it has long been evident that her songwriting and public narrative don't match up. The most obvious theme being her 17-year run of writing songs about secret relationships and hiding, while she was parading men around in public to be photographed with. But, as we know, most people ignore it because it's just easier than digging deeper into lyrics. But now with Midnights, I'm starting to think she wants people to notice the duality and start to question her narrative. The sheer number of songs on that album that have strong double meaning or draw attention to lying or distorting the truth is astonishing: Right out the gate with track 1 we have Lavender Haze, a pretty loud song about bearding using the very well established queer reference of lavender. (And maybe she leaned out of the window a little too far with that title, because we all know the gaylor uproar was so loud when the title was revealed, that she had to backpedal and hetsplain it.) Immediately followed by Maroon, the song that has probably singlehandedly turned the most swifties into gaylors since Bettygate of 2020... Then on to Anti Hero, the ultimate duality song that also makes mention of lying and scheming, same as Mastermind. High Infidelity and You're Losing Me join the ranks of songs that look like they are about romantic relationships on the surface, but could also be interpreted to be about Taylor's relationship with fame and her fans. High Infidelity is a play on words of the term High Fidelity or HIFI, which is a 90s sound technology that refers to truthful reproduction of sound. High INfidelity is therefore a genius way of referring to both cheating and unfaithful reproduction of sound, almost like someone who makes music that isn't quite truthful... We also know from Aaron Dessner that this song was written following the 2021 Grammys and in the light of the whole William Bowery grammygate situation... I think there is point to be made about this song drawing attention to lying in a big way.

The timing of the release of You're losing me right around the time that her breakup with Joe made the news also feeds the narrative of a breakup song. But in this very 'breakup song' she says You say, "I don't understand," and I say, "I know you don't" and talks about sending signals that fall on deaf ears. Doesn't that sound an awful lot like 'I gave so many signs'? What does she know the addressee won't understand? Is it that when she finally reveals all her lies 90% of her fans will be shocked to their very core? On the exclusive CD version that has this track on it, it also immediately follows Dear Reader which on the track list looks like this:

Dear Reader You're Losing me (Does that look like a message? I think it does...)

By the time we make it to Dear Reader, she's basically told us 'I'm a liar who hides behind fake lavender relationships who charms everyone like a sleezy congressman, I'm the narcissistic Anti Hero you can't trust who schemes like a criminal and plans out everything like the puppet master I am, just so you like me and therefore you shouldn't look up to me, but I know you still will.' If that doesn't scream 'I want you to question everything I say or do' I don't know what does. Which brings us to performance art.

What is performance art?

Performance art is any kind of visual art that involves a dramatic performance aspect. To explain how this relates to Taylor and who she may have taken inspiration from, I refer to the brilliant Kristina Parro on TikTok:

Ok, groundwork is laid, but this is getting too long. Part 2 will be relating this to upcoming music releases and media coverage but that will have to wait til tomorrow.

As always, thanks for humouring me guys!

#taylor swift #gaylor #eras tour #midnights album #one year of midnights #performance art #unreliable narrator

[honeybubblebeeeeee]

EXILE || Kylo Ren x Fem!reader

Exile by Taylor Swift but it's you and Kylo

Tw: Straight angst honestly

You and Kylo had a falling out. Not just a falling out. A full on terrible break up. Words were said, threats were made. You were tired of begging Kylo for the bare minimum. You had split a few months ago and had successfully avoided each other. But you knew you'd see him tonight at the First Order ball. You chose a black dress with deep red accents that hugged your body in all the right places, a thigh slit up the side and a deep neckline. One Kylo had picked out for you long ago. Did you wear it so he would look at you? Maybe, but you would never admit to it.

Your date was not someone you knew well, just someone who had worked in your division and had asked you to go. You wanted to apologize in advance for the backlash he would receive from Kylo but you didn't. You swayed together to the music that played as other couples danced around you. His arms were wrapped around you pulling you closer than you had really wanted to be to him as your eyes scanned over his shoulder for the darkness that had shadowed you for so long. Your date whispered something in your ear, something that was probably supposed to be funny but you weren't listening as your mind was occupied, you forced a laugh anyway. I can see you standing, honey With his arms around your body Laughing but the joke's not funny at all

Kylo stood in the hall outside the ballroom. The doors were slightly open, enough that he could see you without you seeing him. He felt his skin crawl as your date's hands caressed the skin that was uncovered by the openness of the back of your dress. The one he got you. His jaw clenched as you smiled and laughed at something your date whispered in your ear.

And it took you five whole minutes To pack us up and leave me with it Holding all this love out here in the hall

Kylo wanted to rip his arms off of you and drag you out of there. You had not even been apart that long. Months maybe, but that was nothing to Kylo. He would never think of another person again and here you were already in the arms of another. You were still his regardless of what you thought. He scoffed as you left the dance floor to sit at a table hand in hand. Kylo had thought you wanted space. That is why he left you alone these past couple months. You were the only place Kylo felt comfortable, he might say safe even. He felt like he was watching from behind glass, like he wasn't really here. Everything he did was for you, so why were you acting this way?

I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending You're not my homeland anymore So what am I defending now? You were my town Now I'm in exile seeing you out I think I've seen this film before

Kylo pulled the doors open wider and stormed into the room. People looked to him as he stalked to the side of the room farthest from you. You didn't even look past the man sat in front of you to look at him. It only angered him more. I can see you staring, honey Like he's just your understudy Like you'd get your knuckles bloody for me

You forced yourself not to look as Kylo stalked into the room. He of course haunted the corner directly in your line of sight if you looked past your date. You could feel his eyes burning into you. Your date excused himself a moment as a group of men called him over.

You looked directly to Kylo. You could almost see the violent tendencies that were crawling under his skin at the sight of you with another man. Not that the man meant anything. Kylo would make him temporary even if he did mean something. You couldn't help but shake your head and look away.

Second, third and hundredth chances Balancing on breaking branches Those eyes add insult to injury

You had given Kylo more than enough chances for years to give you more than the bare minimum. You had begged and cried and hoped he would act like you were more than something replaceable. He was cold and unforgiving. In all honesty, you never really knew how he felt about you because he would never tell you.

You looked up and made eye contact with him. The look on his face made you wince. At first glance he looked angry and you were sure he was but his eyes, his eyes looked almost teary. Hurt.

You looked for your date, who seemed to have found someone else to be more interested in. That was probably for the best.

I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending I'm not your problem anymore So who am I offending now? You were my crown Now I'm in exile seeing you out I think I've seen this film before So I'm leaving out the side door

You stood abruptly and moved quickly to the smaller door behind you to leave. You couldn't stand to be here anymore. To see him stare at you like a neglected puppy when you were the one who had been neglected. You slipped through the door, walking quickly down the hall when the door opened behind you and heavy footsteps followed you.

So step right out There is no amount Of crying I can do for you

A gloved hand grabbed your arm and whipped you around as tears fell from your eyes. Kylo gripped your shoulders as he stared into your eyes, jaw clenched. All this time We always walked a very thin line You didn't even hear me out (You didn't even hear me out) You never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs) "What do you want Kylo?" Your voice broke as it left your lips.

"Why were you with him? I gave you space like you wanted and this is what I get in return?" His voice was cold as always.

You scoff and shake your head pulling away from him. "Space? Really? When did I EVER ask for SPACE?"

He stares at you, unmoving as if his brain cannot process the words.

"All I have ever wanted is for you to act like you actually give a shit about me Kylo." You spun to look to him as he continued to stand there emotionless. You scoff and shake your head. "And for the record we have not been together this entire time, we are not together right now so it does not matter who I am with." You turn away from him but his voice stops you.

"When was it decided that we were not... I did not realize you did not want to be with me" You let you a chuckle, he couldn't even say you were together.

"Kylo, how many times did I beg you to stop treating me like I was temporary? Did you not hear me every time I told you I couldn't do this anymore?" The look on his face made you feel like maybe you really hadn't said it out loud but you know you did.

He shook his head. "I don't understand."

All this time I never learned to read your mind (Never learned to read my mind) I couldn't turn things around (You never turned things around) 'Cause you never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs) So many signs So many signs (You didn't even see the signs)

"You don't understand or you don't want to understand? What, did you think I was avoiding you for fun these past few months? That I removed all my belongings from your room just for something to do?" You threw your hands up in defeat. Again as usual, he still showed not a single emotion.

He opened his mouth to say something but shut it just as quickly.

"I'm done Kylo." You turned away and made haste in escaping him. He didn't follow this time. He hadn't seen the signs.

His hands bunched into fists at his side as the ring in his pocket burned a hole in him.

(also send requests! i appreciate them they help smmmm with writers block <3)

#kylo ren x reader #kylo fanfic #kylo x reader #kylo x you #kylo #kylo angst #kylo ren

[zombiiegrr]

Brooklyn Baby. (๑>◡<๑)

a dbf! bucky x afab! reader.

word count : 3130

honestly everything is the same but Bucky is like healed happy and he more like amazing soldier then winter solder lol and jazz thanos didn’t happen causes it’s not marvel it’s more like real army idk with Tony still bring a billionaire + vision being ‘normal’ like wandavison and wanda acting like that aswell :)

cw: y/n is down so bad, cocky!bucky, slightly toxic! bucky not at first, age gaps (y/n is 21 while bucky is 38), cursing, smut. jealously, secret relationship. mentions of skin tone doesn’t exist here. daddy issues, slight mommy issues idk characters pick up the reader theyre all STRONG ass men so dont think the reader is supposed to be petite or anything!! ALSO there’s mention of recent readers 21 birthday ok I’m a june 3 gemini so… idk… ur birthday but it’s technically going to be hot in the fanfic so summer but I won’t say birthdates

Your mother had you at 17 leading to your father going into the military at 18 leaving you and your mother, fighting for his country meeting friends turning into family including bucky

i've always thought when someone watches someone growup then bangs them is kinda sooooo odd.. so bucky was never really around the reader when she was a kid he was on duty and when he was around the reader was way to nervous to even be downstairs when he was there so its not like that!!!!!!

music i listened to while writing. some song fit ill tell u to play them

new chapter

this is a series! comment to be added to the tag list

@aemondmylove @arilevinsonhavemybabies @masturbucky @alwayshungryforramen @yvonneeeee

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

“Now landing in New York! enjoy your holiday or welcome home!” The flight attendant says waking you up. You stood gain the feeling back in your legs, got your suitcase from above you wait for the people in front of you to get their items.

Your phone finally gained service flooding in texts from your roommate asking if you got on the flight safe. a bit from your mother telling you to make your dad get you things and more family telling you to have fun and say hi to your father for them. after reading most you finally got to your father's texts telling you his friends were coming to the airport to get you and to be “nice to them”

Just great. You loved your dads' friends the only thing was you had a crush on about every one of them realizing how attractive they are when you hit puberty making you shy around them leading to them thinking you dislike them. It had been 8 years since you left to California to live with your mother for school/the social life (Californian here!) Visiting during summers, Christmas, Thanksgivings and or your father's birthday. After 18 you choose spending summers and most holidays with your father and mother sometimes coming with.

Your fathers' main friends. Steve Rogers, Tony Stark, San Wilson, Thor Odinson, Clint Barton, James Rhodes. James “Bucky” Barnes, & Scott Lang. Your father had a lot of friends from all over and They were all handsome, but Bucky was breathtaking. You hadn’t seen him in 8 years well you seen him but hadn't even had a full convo you would avoid him like the plague being so embarrassed of the things you talked about with your friends when they pointed him out in family vacation photos.

You finally fully got off the plane moving quicky not wanting to be late and make them wait outside as you arrive outside blinded by the brightness of the sun as you wait for your eyes to adjust. As you finally get the hang of the brightness you hear some walking fast behind you “NO WAY SAME AIRPORT!?” Scott says as he walks over holding cassies hand as she waves aggressively with her other hand you smile wide knowing Scott lived above you in California , San Francisco. So it made sense landing in the same airport.

A car horn makes you all look over quickly seeing an Chrysler 300 with a metal arm out the window meeting the glasses of a guy smirking at you and before you could react someone busts open the back door making your face light up realizing who it was.

“DOUNTTTTT!!!!!” Clint screamed getting looks from other people there as you ran to him aswell

“HAWKEYE!!!” Clint had earned the name hawkeye when he had been the only one approved to use a bow and arrow with guns on the field and according to your dad he moved and had the eyes of a hawk giving him the nickname “Hawkeye” which you loved as a child still using now when he called to check on you helping you during fails and letting you stay with his family during fights with your mom.

"Geez you look all different kid had to make sure it was you." Clint says as he hugged you tightly giving you a kiss on the forehead while taking your suitcase in the other arm.

"Is that really you superstar you got taller or is something else different?" A kind smile meets your eyes as Sam reaches over the driver's seat "Well, I'm 21 now! last time you seen me I was like what 17?" Clint nods his head as he puts your suitcase in the back of the car.

“WHATS UP TINY” Sam says as he gets out the car to run and hug Cassie earning a giggle from Cassie as he lifts her up “oh you brought your father” sam jokes as he puts her down “Yeah ok Sam it’s great to see you to” Scott laughs as he hugs him and Clint

"Hello ladybug" Bucky says removing his glasses. he called you ladybug when he came home from duty to you welcoming him home with your dad in a ladybug outfit and when you dyed your hair red and black and always wore black and white. You liked ladybugs and liked that the few times you spoken; he had called you one.

"James-" he laughed slightly at your formality reminding you that bucky was fine making your stomach fluttery at the eye contact "Almost drove past you bug. You look beautiful you father talks about you like you're still a kid hiding from us on the stairs. But then I seen Scott your a lifesaver Scott " Bucky eyes you making you feel small under his gaze.

"Woah lay off the charm handsome" Scott laughs out loud not causing Bucky to break eye contact just smirk a bit more.

You get in the car begging bucky to drive you home fast He laughs and jokes about how insane Californians are with driving. OfCourse the two in the car start agreeing and shit talking Californians. You laugh seeing as you were literally in NEW YORK and so were they. and in an argument between the worst driving between New York and Cali? New York takes the cake or at least in your opinion.

you see scott putting his stuff in the back and you asking if Scott and Cassie were getting a ride then you got confirmation that Scott was invited by your father and you would be going to the same place!

the car ride was a bit quiet besides humming from you or clint. Many questions from Cassie before she passed out knocked out after 5 minutes. Bucky did ask about school, housing, and asked how your mom was doing. You answered all happily just happy to talk to anyone other then your roommate or your mom. Sam starts to ask the ‘good’ questions asking if you had had a drink yet since you had (recently) turned 21 extremely quietly looking over at Cassie You answered half ass knowing you truthfully had only had a few cocktails and maybe a beer while at a party only enough to get tipsy nothing getting you drunk.

You Start to pull up to the house watching your father standing outside with Tony talking about something noticing us pulling in.

“OH YOUR HOME” you father says LOUDLY gaining a very blank stare from Tony covering his ear rolling his eyes. He parks and you run out to hug your father being too broke to see him but not wanting to ask others to pay for a ticket you hugged him for a while before tony ask how long it’s been since you had seen each other.

“6 Months. Longest time since I was on duty.” You father answers gaining a frown from you. “College payment. I went broke and tried working overtime but my car-“your father cut you off with another hug reminding you that you’re here now daddy issue go crazy.

It had taken a while to repair the relationship with your father dealing with the damage of what he did and how his cheating broke up your family and how he ‘parented you’ due to his own issues and ‘shell shock’ from the years at service you could recognize he was trying so hard to change and heal.

“not to ruin the moment but I have a surprise or well we have a surprise let’s go inside” you dad says as you watch Clint grab your bag so you start walking in with your dad.

Steve, and Rhodes were talking in the kitchen looking over and noticing you. “Hell kid you sure grew up” Steve walks over giving you a big hug seen as those are common today sorry if you hate hugs Rhodes behind also giving you a hug.

“Ok give me the floor please lady’s and gentlemen. I and Darren have decided to force all of you to go on a family trip with us and before any of you say shit like ‘work’ or ‘kids’ or whatever I will slap you i cleared everything for you guys cause I’m me. But yeah kids are coming with causes it a damn huge lake house” Tony says as he pulls his laptop out to pull up the lake house Information.

“We and I mean WE ALL will be staying at Twin Oaks At The Chapin Estate for the summer because I own that place and it sits there collecting dust. HEY, Clint your kids they will have a room with bunk beds and Scott you okay with Cassie bunking them and Morgan?” Scott said it was perfectly fine with him if It was okay with Cassie who was nodding. Tony continued “it’s me and pepper of course Darren already claimed his room Nat and banner are gonna visit but not stay, Vision, Wanda, their kids and Thor will be staying in a place that they decided to rent like a seven-minute walk away from away from us so that’s cool. So that’s three more rooms any takers?

Everyone was kind of collecting information. You were overjoyed about going out to the lake and the family restaurants in that area. Sam said that he was fine with a couch and really didn’t need a room which a few people without rooms started to agree with.

As everyone started talking about rooms and stays and everything else your mind starts to wander to Bucky and the thought you and him staying in the same place overnight although you did feel a bit silly getting so excited over that. You didn’t even realize he was sitting right in front of you at the table smiling at you making you feel warm you stupidly thought if he could hear your thoughts. You thought about asking your dad to put you both in the same room cringing at the look your father would give you.

“hey ladybug” bucky whispers making you look at him making eye contact for the first time in a bit. “Hm?” You ask trying not to express any nervousness especially not around everyone else and especially not in front of him. “excited? I haven’t been on a trip in forever even if we’re staying in New York that place is expensive knowing Tony” you agreed saying you were excited just nervous about getting bored or homesick he laughed a bit and reminded you he won’t let you get bored locking eye contact feeling his knee slightly hit yours before he his smirk slightly grew.

“Okay final decision. Me and pepper, Clint and Laura, The kids, Darren, y/n, Rhodes, and Steve. And for some reason the rest of you prefer the couches? I dont know but I don’t care it’s figured out. Also shit I told the kids I’m sponsoring that he can bring his friends out to the lake and the pool and the gym and all that they aren’t staying but heads up.”

“Parker?” Darren asks. Tony nodded his head as he closed his computer. Everyone looked happy and it make you happy. Bucky would be using a couch which seemed like something he would do but being honest he’ll probably share a room with Steve falling asleep on the couch in Steve’s room of choice. You were fine with him sneaking in your room though

When the thought came to your head your looked at him right away giggling and squeezing your legs together like a teenager everyone looked at your confused and you father asked what was so funny backed up by bucky wondering as-well you laughed again apologizing and changing the subject saying you would be going shopping to pack for the trip backed up by Scott asking if you would be so kind to pick up a bathing suit for Cassie which you agreed

“Do you even remember where everything is?” Bucky teased. Why was he being so flirty? Were you being delusional?? Were you misinterpreting everything? Was he flirting or just hot and talking .

“yeah. Wanna go with just incase I forgot?” Smoothhhh you thought to yourself begging that no one else will invite themselves attempting to keep his invitation quiet.

“Don’t mind if I do. I have the ugliest swim trunks so I have to get new ones hun” he replied getting up saying he would get his keys

Everyone else said it would be smart to go Home and pack or something all deciding to meet up here again the next morning at 7am to start the drive over seeing as it would take a few hours did my research frfr

about 30 minutes later! (>ω^)

“sooo adult Life? How do you like it? I asked this before but in a car full of people and a kid so is it the same answer?” Bucky asked as walked around the clothing store you laughed knowing you did change your answer cause of the people in the car

“It’s shit. My mom forgets I’m a adult and cussed me out because i went to “way to many parties in one week” and posted “things” when I knew people from church view my story so she took my car which caused me to spend everything on a new one which is why I couldn’t pay to come out here” you could feel the words pouring out of you and Bucky was an amazing listener he followed every word you spoke feeling and reading you emotions and you could tell that made your heart pound.

“Man im sorry kid. Why didn’t you reach out? Dumb question I know it can be hard but your ‘uncle’ is a billionaire he would have happily got you a ticket to visit and your dad missed you like crazy he would have definitely helped.”

you frowned again. “oh no ladybug I didn’t mean like you did something wrong I’m just saying we’re here for you. We care and if you ever need to come out here for anything we will happily help. excuse me I’m not the best with words”

“you’re great. thank you bucky.” you said as you hugged his arm he pulled you away a bit which made you confused but then he gave you a full hug in the middle of the store which made you laugh in embarrassment, but you wouldn’t let him go. He smelt so good and covered so much of you he held on to you so tightly and easy it make you shake.

“Woah you're shaking to hard of a hug. Sorry kid” you held on before he could let go and reassured him that you were fine and just a bit touch starved, he let out an attractive laugh whispering take all the time you need. You could feel the change in your panties as you grew wetter in his hold as he whispered asking If you were alright. Making you hold him tighting nodding you head.

You finally let go shaking embarrassed that you were this into a hug for crying out loud. You locked eye contact he was smirkingly as usual looking down at your basket asking if you got everything you needed you nodded asking if he did Aswell seeing as he had nothing.

“Oh no sweetheart I just wanted a excuse to come with” you genuinely felt like you had a flood in your panties you felt so shameless for getting so wet over that over everything he did or said you nodded and smiled at him walking away before you did something stupid.

While in line Bucky was clearly eyeing your basket. The underwear the bikini THE everything or maybe he was just looking over? Unless he asked “isn't that a bit small?” pointing at the bikini “your daddy isn't gonna like that”

“I don’t care what daddy thinks or says I want the bikini”

for once Bucky looked surprised or well for a few seconds before he had a different look on his face he looked so good like he liked whatever I said I didn’t want to jump to conclusions but you’re sure it had something with saying daddy.

“Move in line y/n” once again whispering in your ear you did once again feeling that pulse in your panties. If he whispered in your ear one more time you were gonna-

“You total is $226.88 cash credit? Debit? Or Apple Pay” The cashier snapped you out of it with that total as you were so confused how you got that much stuff for a 1-and-a-half-month trip. Before you could think Bucky puts his Card in being way to buff for you to cross over and cancel you just stood there saying nonooooooooo i GOT it when you definitely didn’t have it but Bucky did. Tony slipped him a card

He grabbed your bags grabbing your hand aswell leading you out saying let’s go.

“Bucky that was a lot of money.” He ignores you as you both get back into the car as you keep repeating that he didn’t need to and that you needed to look at everything to see if it was even worth it and he still wasnt repling until he did.

“Y/n i GOT it. Please kid don’t worry about me we’re gonna have so much fun and spend a lot of time together if thats alright with you and if you would stop stressing about some money right now we could start having fun right sweetheart? Thank you.” He said calmly just sternly making me sit back into lt seat

“Atta girl thank you” you almost whimpered outloud he was very leading and it made you weak he probably knew so much things you don’t you want him to teach you

“hellllllllo you’re Home ladybug” you look around seeing that youre in your driveway and start to freak out nervous to ask for his number. “Thank you so much. Is there anyway we could talk? Instagram? Number? Email? Sorry that’s silly.“ you were mixing all of your words up again. he nodded and took his phone out handing his phone to you as you put you phone number in you felt his eyes on you.

“Thank you i was going to ask someone for you number but easy if you did First” you GOT nervous at THE idea that he fought of you.

“good night Bucky don’t forget tomorrow” You said as you got your bags and got out the card.

“Oh i wouldn’t miss it for the world ladybug” he said as he watching you making sure you got into the house safely

until next time sweetheart.

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

I hope you guys liked this!!! took so long im so sorry plz plz let me know how you guy liked it also Lmk for tag list this is a series.

#bucky imagine #bucky barnes #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #james buchanan barnes #bucky x y/n #dbf!bucky x reader #dbf!bucky #dbf!steve x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky fic #winter soldier #sam wilsom #marvel x you #marvel x plus size reader #marvel x female reader #marvel x reader #marvel #dbf! #fanfic #james bucky buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #james buchanan bucky barnes #winter solider smut #winter solider edit #bucky fanfic #steve rodgers imagine #steve rodgers x reader #tony stank #Spotify

[lajikookbolala]

I want to take a moment to thank an incredible YouTube channel, Wonsummernight. But first, let me explain why.

This story takes place about two years ago. It was summer of 2021. It was hot out and I was spending my days inside, laying lazily on my couch and listening to music on my earbuds. Then, one day, by coincidence, I stumbled across a song called Butter, by the band BTS.

At first, I was a bit hesitant to like it. I didn't know much about BTS or K-pop in general other than the fact that the fans were hated on relentlessly. But, I decided to push that thought to the side, and I listened to the song, on repeat, for a few days.

On June 28th, 2021, I watched the Butter music video for the first time. And the second time. And the third time. And the fifth time.

I was absolutely hooked. That one shot of Jungkook singing the chorus with his purple hair was enough to make me swoon, and swoon I did.

I showed my friends, but none of them saw what I saw.

So, I continued on my BTS journey by myself. I started digging deeper into the fandom. I began with learning about each member; their names, their roles in the group, etc. Then, I began watching compilations of funny moments.

I was obsessed, and I needed to share my obsession with someone, but I knew nobody would understand. So, I showed some of these videos to one of my very best friends: my mom. And, of course, being an extremely smart woman, she was immediately hooked as well. We basically became fans at the same time, laughing and crying and yelling together about these seven amazing men and how much we both loved them.

Then, about a week after I first joined the fandom, I stumbled across a video on YouTube, a type of video I had never seen before.

A Taekook video.

Intrigued, I clicked, and not knowing much about the boys at this time, I believed the video. Even though it was absolute garbage, I wasn't used to seeing anything like this, so I thought everything in the video was true, even though it obviously wasn't. My mom, however, didn't get it. She didn't even understand what shipping was or why people did it.

That was until one day, about a month later, when my mom stumbled across a video on her own YouTube home page.

A Jikook video.

She tried to show me, saying that she had never seen any two people more in love in her life. I was extremely against it at first, but since she was my mother I eventually gave in.

I still remember the feeling I got when I first watched that video. It was somehow a physical manifestation of what I was thinking. It was as if my body was yelling; oh shit, I was completely wrong.

I forgot about that video, as I'd watched so many others since, but today I remembered it.

This was the video that first got me into Jikook.

For the last two years, I've been on an emotional rollercoaster. Being a Jkkr can sure be stressful, but the small moments of joy are what make the shipping worth it. The small moments like watching videos like these.

I hope anyone reading this takes a moment to go and watch some of this channel's videos. It's been an intense day, and we all definitely need a break from the drama.

And last but not least I want to thank two people: Wonsummernight, and my mom. The two people who helped me get into Jikook. I am extremely grateful to both of you.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️☀️🌙

#jikook #kookmin #Youtube

[odinsblog]

ALICE RANDALL, on how she became a country music writer at the age of 23

Well, I decided to become a Black country songwriter and publisher. I was founding Midsummer Music because I was born in Detroit City in 1959, at the same year as Motown Records, and my father did not read books to me. He told me stories, and one of the stories he told me over and over was the founding of Anna Records that Barry Gordy's sisters had founded a year before Motown.

So he talked to me about women being song publishers and record company executives and songwriters, and I heard those stories and followed in Anna's footsteps.

On writing country melodies

I teasingly say that my melodies are so simple that when the ones I come up with, if I can sing them, the whole world can sing them, so it goes well for having hit sometimes. But I came to Nashville via Harvard in Washington, DC so I sort of took the skills that I learned analyzing the Harlem Renaissance poets and Shakespeare and Jane Austen, and I applied them to country lyrics. I love British metaphysical poetry and American metaphysical poetry, and it was alive and it was alive and hiding in country and western music, and I found it.

On race in the country music industry

The racial fault line in country is all around that theme of the past is better than the present. In much of white country, the past that is better than the present is a mythologized Dixie. In much of Black Country, the past that is better than the present, is a time in childhood where your parents were able, against all odds, to protect you, or a lost Africa before colonization that's manifest by nature.

On what makes a country song, country

Well, the equation is Celtic, that's English, Irish, Scottish ballot forms, plus African influences, plus evangelical Christianity equals country music. Don't have the Black influences, and you probably got folk music. Don't have the evangelical Christianity, and you may have blues.

It's emotional, and they're themes, the big themes of country, as far as I see it. Life is hard, God is real, the road, family, and liquor are significant compensations, and the past is better than the present.

On metaphors

Well, these lyrics, these really complicated lyrics such as, ‘Drop kick me, Jesus, through the goalpost of life,’ that's an extended metaphysical conceit. And you know what? On Beyoncé’s new album, Cowboy Carter, Bodyguard is another one of those extended, complex metaphors that we see all through country.

On Black women in country music

I feel actually a Juneteenth, which is good news at long last. Because I will be 65 May 4th, and I have been in country and western music for 41 years professionally.

When I arrived here in 1983, Charlie Pride had been to the number one spot 29 times. It was about to go up for another time. So many Black men have gotten to the number one spot.

I can't remember all their names, but literally not one Black woman performer had gotten there. There's a phrase I want to say, cultural redlining. Black women have been culturally redlined out of that.

They had not been given the economic resources to make the campaign to get there. And Beyoncé eclipsed all of that. And I can retire now with a joy that all three of the things I wanted to see, they got done.

One came in right at the last moment, wouldn't have gotten there without Queen B.

On representation and the first time she heard one of her songs performed by Adia Victoria, a Black woman

I cried. I cried. Just thinking back on it right now almost makes me cry again.

It changed the whole beginning of my book, because I knew I had to start with that moment. Over the years, I've been honored, and I tell the story. Glenn Campbell, Moe Bandy, Radney Foster, Tricia Yearwood, so many extraordinary stars had sung my songs.

But no one had ever looked like me had sung one of my songs. And more significantly, listeners thought all the heroes and sheroes in my songs were white, because the singers were white. And some of those heroes and sheroes, I had imagined them, all of them I had imagined as Black.

And I was willing and embraced people projecting their identities onto them, but I resisted the identities I had originally imagined and created being erased. And Adia Victoria added the color back to that cowboy. And 20 to 30% of all cowboys in the American West were Black and Brown, and they deserve to be remembered.

And if we don't remember them, we cannot properly encounter Cowboy Carter.

#alice randall #politics #music #country music #my black country #beyonce #cowboy carter #black country #texas holdem

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Down in the (link)dumps

On September 27, I'll be at Chevalier's Books in Los Angeles with Brian Merchant for a joint launch for my new book The Internet Con and his new book, Blood in the Machine. On October 2, I'll be in Boise to host an event with VE Schwab.

Back when I was writing on Boing Boing, I'd slam out 10-15 blog posts every day, short hits that served as signpost and public notebook, but I rarely got into longer analysis of the sort I do daily now on Pluralistic. Both modes are very useful for organizing one's thoughts, and indeed, they complement each other:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/05/09/the-memex-method/

The problem is that when you write long, synthetic essays, they crowd out the quick hits. Back in May 2022, I started including three short links with each edition of Pluralistic, in a section called "Hey look at this" (thanks to Mitch Wagner for suggesting it!):

https://pluralistic.net/2022/03/01/reit-modernization-act/#linkdump

But even with that daily linkdump, I still manage to accumulate link-debt, as interesting things pile up, not rising to the level of a long blog-post, but not so disposable as to be easy to flush. When the pile gets big enough, I put out a Saturday Linkdump:

https://pluralistic.net/tag/linkdump/

All of which is to say, it's Saturday, and I've got a linkdump!

First up, a musical interlude. I've been listening to DJ Earworm's amazing mashups since 2005 and while I've got dozens of tracks that shuffle in and out of my daily playlist, the one that makes me wanna get up and dance every time is "No One Takes Your Freedom," a wildly improbable banger composed of equal parts Aretha Franklin, The Beatles, George Michael and Scissor Sisters:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JaboIeW1A_4

I defy you to play that one without bopping a little. I think it's the French horn from "For No One" that really kills it, the world's least expected intro to a heavy dance beat.

Moving swiftly on: let's talk about fonts. I remember when Wired magazine first showed up at the bookstores I was working at in Toronto, and my bosses – younger men than I am now! – complained that the tiny, decorative fonts, rendered in silver foil on a purple background, was illegible. I laughed at them, batting my young eyes and devouring the promise of a better future with ease, even in dim light.

Now it's thirty years later and I'm half-blind. Both my my decaying, aging eyes are filmed with cataracts that I'm too busy to get removed (though my doc promises permanent 20:20, perfect night-vision, and implanted bifocals when I can spare a month from touring with new books to get 'em fixed).

Which is to say: I spend a lot more time thinking about legibility now than I did in the early 1990s, and I've got a lot more sympathy for those booksellers' complaints about Wired's aggressively low-contrast design today. I'm forever on the hunt for fonts designed for high legibility.

This week, Kottke linked to B612, a free/open font family "designed for aircraft cockpit screens," commissioned by Airbus. It's got all the bells and whistles (e.g. hinting) and comes in variable and monospace faces:

https://b612-font.com/

B612 arrived at a fortuitous moment, coinciding with a major UI overhaul in Thunderbird, the app I spend the second-most time in (I spend more time in Gedit, the bare-bones text-editor that comes with Ubuntu, the flavor of GNU/Linux I use). A previous Thunderbird UI experiment had made all the UI text effectively unreadable for me, causing me to dive deep into the infinitely configurable settings to sub in my own fonts:

http://kb.mozillazine.org/UserChrome.css

The new UI is much better, but it broke all my old tweaks, so I went back into those settings and switched everything to B612, and it's amazeballs. I tried doing the same in Gedit, but B612 mono was too light for my shitty eyes, so I went back to Jetbrains Mono, another free/open font that has 8 weights to choose from:

https://www.jetbrains.com/lp/mono/

Love me a new, legible font! Meanwhile, a note for all you designers: the received wisdom that black on white type is "hard on the eyes" is a harmful myth. Stop with the grey-on-white type, for the love of all that is holy. This isn't 1992, you aren't laying out type for Wired Issue 1.0. Contrast is good, actually.

Continuing on the subject of software updates: Mastodon, the free, open, federated social media platform that anyone can host and that lets you hop between one server and another with just a couple clicks, has released a major update, focusing on usability, especially for people unfamiliar with its conventions:

https://blog.joinmastodon.org/2023/09/mastodon-4.2/

Included in this fix: a major overhaul to how you interact with posts on servers other than your home server. This was both confusing and clunky, and the fix makes it much better. They've also changed how sign-up flow works, making things simpler for newbies, and they've cleaned up the UI, tweaking threads, web previews and other parts of the daily experience.

There's also a lot of changes to search, but search still remains less than ideal, with multi-server search limited to hashtags. This is bad, actually. Thankfully, we don't have to wait for Mastodon devs to decide to fix it, because Mastodon is free and open, which means anyone with the skills to code a change, or the money to pay techies to do it, or the moral force to convince them to do it, can effect that change themselves:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/12/23/semipermeable-membranes/

Case in point: Mastoreader, a great new thread reader for Mastodon:

https://mastoreader.io/

Every time that guy who owns Twitter breaks it even worse, a new cohort of users sign up. Not all of them stay, but the growth is steady and the trendline is solid:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/11/of-course-mastodon-lost-users/

It's the right call: while there are other services that promise that they will be federated someday, promises are easy, and there's world of difference between "federateable" and "federated." As GW Bush told us, "Fool me twice, we don't get fooled again":

https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/06/fool-me-twice-we-dont-get-fooled-again/

One big difference between the kind of blogging I used to do in my Boing Boing days and the long-form work I do today is the graphics. When you're posting 10-15 times/day, you can't make each graphic a standout (or at least, I can't). But I can (and do) devote substantial time to making a single collage out of public domain and Creative Commons graphics every day:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/12/25/a-year-in-illustration/

I am not a visual person – literally, I can barely see! – but my daily art practice has slowly made me a less-terrible illustrator. I got in some good licks this week, like this graphic for the UAW's new "Eight-and-Skate" work-to-rule program:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/21/eight-and-skate/#strike-to-rule

That graphic was fun because all the elements were from the public domain, or fair use. I love it when that happens. I've spent years amassing a bulging folder of public domain clip art ganked from the web and this week, it got a major infusion, thanks to the Bergen Public Library's Flickr album of high-rez scans of antique book endpapers. 86 public domain textures? Yes please! (Also, the fact that Flickr has one-click download of all the hi-rez versions of every image in a photoset is another way that it stands out as a remnant of the old, good web, not so much a superannuated relic as an elegant weapon of a more civilized age):

https://www.flickr.com/photos/bergen_public_library/albums/72157633827993925

Speaking of strikes: there are strikes! Everygoddamnedwhere! After 40 years in a Reagan-induced coma, labor is back, baby. The Cornells School of Industrial and Labor Relations' Labor Action Tracker is your go-to, real-time observation post as hot labor summer turns into the permanent revolution. As of this writing, it's listing 968 labor actions in 1491 locations:

https://striketracker.ilr.cornell.edu

There's no war but class war and it was ever thus. Brian Merchant's forthcoming book Blood In the Machine is a history of the Luddites, revisiting that much-maligned labor uprising, which has been rewritten as a fight between technophobes and the inevitable forces of progress:

https://www.littlebrown.com/titles/brian-merchant/blood-in-the-machine/9780316487740/

The book unearths the true history of the Ludds: they were skilled technologists who were outraged by capital's commitment to immiseration, child slavery, and foisting inferior goods on a helpless public. You can get a long preview of the book in Fast Company:

https://www.fastcompany.com/90949827/what-the-luddites-can-teach-us-about-standing-up-to-big-tech

Merchant also talked with Roman Mars about the book on the 99 Percent Invisible podcast:

https://99percentinvisible.org/episode/blood-in-the-machine/transcript/

If that's piqued your interest and if you can make it to Los Angeles, come by Chevalier's Books this Wednesday, where Brian and I are having a joint book-launch (I've just published The Internet Con, my Luddite-adjacent "Big Tech Disassembly Manual"):

https://www.eventbrite.com/o/chevaliers-books-8495362156

Where is all this labor unrest coming from? Well as Stein's Law has it, "anything that can't go on forever will eventually stop." 40 years of corporate-friendly political economy has lit the world on fire and immiserated billions, and we've hit bottom and started the long, slow climb to a world that prioritizes human thriving over billionaire power.

One of the most tangible expressions of that vibe shift is the rise and rise of antitrust. The big news right now is the (first) trial of the century, Google's antitrust trial. What's that? You say you haven't heard anything about it? Well, perhaps that has to do with the judge banning recording and livestreaming and not making transcripts available. Don't worry, he's also locking observers out of his courtroom for hours at a time during closed testimony. Oh, and also? The DoJ just agreed that it won't post its exhibits from the trial online anymore. You can follow what dribbles of information as are emerging from our famously open court system at US v Google:

https://usvgoogle.org/trial-update-9-22

If the impoverished trickle of Google antitrust news has you down, don't despair, there's more coming, because the FTC is apparently set to drop its long-awaited suit against Amazon:

https://finance.yahoo.com/news/ftc-poised-sue-amazon-antitrust-163432081.html

Amazon spent years blowing hundreds of millions of dollars of its investors' cash, selling goods below cost and buying up rivals until it became the most important channel for every kind of manufacturer to reach their customers. Now, Amazon is turning the screws. A new report from the Institute for Local Self-Reliance details the 45% Amazon Tax that every merchant pays to reach you:

https://ilsr.org/AmazonMonopolyTollbooth-2023/

That 45% tax is passed on to you – whether or not you shop at Amazon. Amazon's secretive most favored nation terms mean that if a seller raises their price on Amazon, they have to raise it everywhere else, which means you're paying more at WalMart and Target because of Amazon's policies.

Those taxes are bad for us, but they're good for Amazon's investors. This year, the company stands to make $185 billion from junk-fees charged to platform sellers. As David Dayen points out, Amazon charges so much to ship third-party sellers' goods that it fully subsidizes Amazon's own shipping:

https://prospect.org/power/2023-09-21-amazons-185-billion-pay-to-play-system/

That's right: as Stacy Mitchell writes in the report, "Amazon doesn’t have to build warehousing and shipping costs into the price of its own products, because it’s found a way to get smaller online sellers to pay those costs."

Now, one of the amazing things about antitrust coming back from the grave is that just the threat of antitrust enforcement can moderate even the most vicious bully's conduct. Faced with the looming FTC case, Amazon just canceled its plan to charge even more junk fees:

https://www.reuters.com/legal/amazon-drops-planned-merchant-fee-ftc-lawsuit-looms-bloomberg-news-2023-09-20/

But despite this win, Amazon is still speedrunning the enshittification cycle. The latest? Unskippable ads in Prime Video:

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2023-09-22/amazon-prime-video-content-to-include-ads-staring-early-2024

Remember when Amazon promised you ad-free video if you'd lock yourself into shopping with them by pre-paying for a year's shipping with Prime? The company has fully embraced the Darth Vader MBA: "I am altering the deal. Pray I don't alter it further."

That FTC case can't come a moment too soon.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/09/23/salmagundi/#dewey-102

#pluralistic

[calliesmemes]

RANDOM DIALOGUE PROMPTS, ACT I

ASSORTED QUOTES FOUND IN FILMS, TELEVISIONS, MUSIC, AND LITERATURE.

CHANGE gendered words as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   All this pain, all this fear began because of me. ”

“   After all this time? ”

“   Be careful what you wish for. ”

“   Can you get us out of the mess we’re in? ”

“   Come sit by my side. ”

“   Could they be misleading us? ”

“   Don’t raise your voice at me! ”

“   Don’t speak to me about grief. ”

“   History is a story told by the winners of the fight. ”

“   How can I see it any other way? ”

“   Hey! What’s the hold up? ”

“   Hey, you’re supposed to be asleep. ”

“   I am growing strangely fond of you. ”

“   I am the one thing in life I can control. ”

“   I don’t look for trouble, but trouble looks for me. ”

“   I don’t trust your judgement. ”

“   I didn’t expect to see you here. ”

“   I have a bad feeling about this. ”

“   I have betrayed everyone and everything I know. ”

“   I mean you no harm, you know. ”

“   I must do what is right. ”

“   I never, ever want to hear you say that again. ”

“   I think he did it, but I just can’t prove it. ”

“   I will not be there to protect you. ”

“   I will not be at your, or anyone's whim. ”

“   I won’t let you down. ”

“   I'll make sure you do what must be done. ”

“   I’m not as strong as I used to be. ”

“   I’m not the one you were meant to find. ”

“   I’m obnoxious and disliked; did you know that? ”

“   I’m trying to keep you alive! ”

“   I'm tired of answering that question. ”

“   In dire circumstances, why wallow in regret? ”

“   I’ve been waiting years for this! ”

“   I’ve destroyed you before. I will destroy you again. ”

“   It all got out of hand, and I am sorry ”

“   It feels like home. ”

“   It is good to see you smiling again. ”

“   It is plain that we are meant to be together. ”

“   It’s a pleasure to meet you. ”

“   It’s inevitable, isn’t it? ”

“   it's my job to take care of you. ”

“   It’s the middle of the night. ”

“   It’s not that easy. ”

“   It's predetermined, so you can't escape it. ”

“   It’s too late for me, anyway. ”

“   Just tell me what you want from me. ”

“   Lost for words? That must be a first for you. ”

“   Maybe it’s not a conspiracy. ”

“   May I… ask a candid question? ”

“   Men are such babies. ”

“   My heart can’t take it anymore! ”

“   New leadership is needed. ”

“   No good deed goes unpunished. ”

“   No one asked your opinion. ”

“   No one will harm you. I won't allow it. ”

“   Nothing’s impossible if you’ve got enough nerve. ”

“   Now it’s risky, but not more than usual. ”

“   Something in me wants more. I can’t rest. ”

“   Something in you knows it. ”

“   Someday you'll explain all of this to me. ”

“   Talk less, smile more. ”

“   The world is cruel; the world is wicked. ”

“   Terrible times breed terrible things. ”

“   That is not an excuse. ”

“   That was a command, not an offer. ”

“   This is evil, unthinkable...please, listen to me. ”

“   This is getting out of hand! ”

��   This isn’t you. ”

“   This is why you were born. ”

“   There’s no one left to trust. ”

“   There you are! I've been looking all over for you. ”

“   There's no one I trust more than I trust you. ”

“   War drives us all to do strange, horrible things. ”

“   Wishing only wounds the heart. ”

“   We can work this out together! ”

“   What choice have I? ”

“   What have you become? ”

“   What if all I have is my suffering? My regret? ”

“   What’s done cannot be undone. ”

“   What's going on? Why aren't you dead? ”

“   Whatever it is you decide to do, i’ll support you ”

“   Where are you off to? ”

“   Where did you learn to fight like that? ”

“   We have to get out of here! ”

“   Will you get out of my way, please? ”

“   Will you share it with us? ”

“   Will you lie down with me? ”

“   Will you fight or will you run? ”

“   Why are we cooperating with— with him? ”

“   You and I, friend, will go down in history. ”

“   You are a pretty little thing. ”

“   You are my home. ”

“   You are right to fear me. ”

“   You belong to me. ”

“   You can see right through me. ”

“   You can’t be serious. ”

“   You don’t have to be embarrassed. ”

“   You don’t have to hide. ”

“   You make everything so complicated. ”

“   You won't suffer alone. i'll be here. ”

“   You seem like a good soul. ”

“   You won’t try. You will obey. ”

“   You don’t have to be afraid! ”

“   You're the best thing that’s ever happened to me. ”

“   You're stronger than I gave you credit for. ”

“   You’re turning your back on your people again. ”

“   You’re plotting something, aren’t you? Out with it. ”

#askbox meme #askbox prompt #rp ask meme #roleplay sentence meme #sentence starters #* sentence meme #ask box #roleplay prompts #roleplay sentence starters

[nihilnovisubsole]

it's that time of year again: AK's 2023 Wrapped™. no, not the music thing. the december year-in-review thing. my spotify charts were deeply unfunny this time around because of all the game soundtracks i've been listening to. i don't know when these end-of-year posts became tradition for me, which is to say i could find out and i'm too lazy to check. the important thing, like lemon pigs or eating black-eyed peas, is that it feels like we've always done it. in the depths of winter, the warmth comes from the routine.

i won't beat around the bush about it: it's been a difficult year. it's been hard enough that it doesn't seem appropriate to joke about it or wave it off in favor of big, blog-worthy wins. times are dark right now. it behooves all of us to think deeply and check on each other. i hope i've been a decent friend to the people who needed it. so instead of scraping together a halfhearted victory lap, i'm going to go against my better judgment and be vulnerable.

it wasn't all bad. i got promoted to staff narrative designer this year, which is a fancy way of saying "you don't have to do time cards anymore." it's strange: in an industry infamous for volatility, my job has become one of the few things i can rely on to be positive. i believe my coworkers like me, which is good, because i like them. i feel not just included, but welcomed at work social events. i've developed a reputation for being a garbage goat on my writing team. "got an odd job? give it to AK. we can count on her to eat it." i had the chance to collaborate with someone i've looked up to for years, and i was delighted to find out how amenable they are to work with. there's work stress and there's work stress. everyone has challenging days, but it's not the crab bucket that voltage was, so it never seems that bad. i keep it in perspective. sure, these tasks keep me on my feet, but is it three cents a word, seven thousand words a week? i'll live.

i just wish it had all been good. it speaks to how my health has been that getting covid in february was one of the most mundane things to happen to me. i did everything right. i had all my boosters. i had paxlovid. i recovered well. still, it knocked me out of orbit in the psychological sense. i stopped getting enough exercise, though i'm building myself up again. i became neurotic about my stats. am i Getting A Good Grade In Blood Pressure? what about Pulse Rate? two months later, i came down with a strange, unrelated condition that was nowhere near as serious as covid, but made my life ten times more difficult. i'm happy to report i feel worlds better these days. even so, it was a bizarre time. bodies sure are curious.

later, my sink flooded my closet, and for a few days, i had to reckon with the idea that mold might destroy my entire wardrobe. all those irreplaceable pieces of character design that i've built my identity around since i was eighteen years old. who would i be without them? a wise person would say it was a lesson: stop defining who you are by your looks and find worth in your inner self. the mold is gone and my clothes are fine, but sometimes i have days where my lungs seem like they're sort of operating at ninety percent. i'm trying not to fuss about it. my checkups are normal, and i feel fine whenever i get out of the house for a while. maybe it'll go away when i move. because, hey, i can contemplate saving for a house now. how about that? remember when my mother and i were homeless? what a surreal landscape of highs and lows.

maybe grief is strange like that. in july, just when my health started to settle down, my grandmother died. it was a long time coming. she was 94 and extremely frail. i handled it well at first. it took the ensuing few months for the full weight of human mortality to sink in. before, i'd mainly been to funerals of warm, but distant old men, great patriarchs who loved but didn't relate to little girls. her, i knew. she was there when i was born. i won't go into detail, but it was not a peaceful passing, and it left problems in its wake. you don't live through that without taking a long, hard look at your life. everyone gets the invincibility knocked out of them sometime.

my mother is too disciplined to let it get the better of her. on the worst days of her life, the stove still got cleaned and the bills got paid. when people give her condolences, she encourages them to look on the bright side: she got almost seventy years with her. how many children can say that? but i can tell she's sad, and i'm not under any illusion i can help. i have to sit with it. there's nothing else for me to do.

under different circumstances, i'd have thrown myself into my work. i'd come up with some writing project to avoid thinking about it. i guess the dominant theme when it comes to my personal writing has been inertia: accomplishing nothing and being unsure of myself. if it's a growing pain, it's a rough one. i question my storytelling instincts so much, it's hard to get a story off the ground, let alone take it anywhere. i've hit a point where i find the conventions of the romance genre limiting. i still want to write about people in love, though, and i can't reconcile the two. why do some love stories get to be love stories and others are "just romance?" you could ask why it's "just" romance, and that's a good, but different conversation, i think. what are the great love stories saying about the human condition that i'm not? what is my work saying, period? not a whole lot, i'm afraid. i used to be pugnacious about writing from my id brain, about doing it for the fun of it. i worry that's not going to cut it anymore. i have to push myself harder. i also have to stop fretting about being perceived as pretentious for asking these questions.

it would be easier if i had more answers. i'm not sure which project to work on next, because they're all half-formed outlines with plots i don't know how to fill. i'm not sure whether it'd be weird for someone with my job to keep writing or posting fanfic, no matter how informally. i'm not sure what role physical intimacy should play in my writing, if any, because along with everything else, this was the year shame caught up to me. i'm not sure what happened there. i hope the "are sex scenes necessary" debate didn't get me, because i'd argue for their artistic merit any day. but when i do it, i worry that it's indiscreet somehow, like i'm revealing myself in ways that make strangers uncomfortable. some days i feel like going through my backlog of published work and tearing out all the sex-adjacent content like a power-mad inquisitor. i won't, because i'd regret it, but i spend a lot of time being embarrassed. it's embarrassing. i can't escape the feeling that people don't want to know that about me.

despite it all, it's still bad form to end on a down note, so i'll leave you with this: after five years, i finally got into physical therapy for my arm. i told my doctor the whole sob story and she put in a referral to a hand/occupational clinic. will it help? i don't know. i've tried so many things that haven't. but they're optimistic that i'm in better shape than i think - i've heard a lot of "wow, we get patients who can't even open a jar!" - so it's worth a shot. if it means i can draw a little more, it's something. i still make time for the picrew every day. ever onward. thanks for hanging in there with me, guys. you keep things interesting.

#long post #fyi there's death stuff in there

[jeffbiblesupremacy]

Jeff's interview for Mint Magazine Thailand

Let’s Make Everyday SATURday (x)

Translation below

After KinnPorsche The Series World Tour 2023 and Jeff Satur Live on Saturn: First Solo Concert in Bangkok, the first solo concert of Jeff Worakamon Satur ended beautifully, and Mint and him met again to catch up about his works. Jeff has grown tremendously as an artist who has his music but also his acting and he has shown his skills to the eyes of the Saturdays throughout the year.

It is believed that the definition of the world "artist" is different for each person. For Jeff Worakamon Satur, also known as Jeff Satur, being an artist is being a storyteller, to convey the stories to the audience with sincerity and spirituality, and without any frame or line, because Jeff's artistic prowess is boundless, just like the story he's going to tell you in this interview.

Mint: What role do you identify with the most? Being a singer or being an actor?

Jeff: In fact, my root is being an artist. I feel like the responsibility of an artist is telling stories. For me, I started with telling stories through songs. Then it expanded to tell stories through acting. Therefore, I'm not looking at myself as a singer or an actor. I'm an artist that shows my true self to the audience.

Mint: What made you come back to music?

Jeff: I don't reckon it as a coming back to music. I’ve never left. I have continued working on my music. Just that, at that time, there was an interesting opportunity for acting. The role was interesting, it fitted me, and I could do it great. Kinnporsche is the only story. I can confirm that music is still my priority tho.

Mint: What criteria do you use to choose a show/role?

Jeff: Actually, there is nothing specific, but it has to be a story that interest me. Personally, I've been listening and telling stories since I was a kid. I like listening stories, watching movies, watching cartoons, watching series, and devouring every story. I grew up with these stories, so I live with a lot of them. I look for new and interesting stories with different plots that make me feel like I want to be part of those storie

Mint: What inspired you to choose Kinnporsche when you just had re-debuted with Warner Music?

Jeff: I get this question a lot during interviews. The first question always was "do you see yourself as a musician or as an actor?" and I would answer "I'm a singer, I don't like acting. I can't do it". In the past, I had never accepted an acting job and I always wanted someone else to be in my MVs, because I didn't like acting and I didn't like to see my face on the screen. I was like I just want to sign autographs, let someone else do the acting instead.

My re-debut with Warner Music was 2 years ago, and I chose the "No boundaries" concept, because I wanted my work had no limits or line. I feel like I've grown up in a way that I shouldn't have a limit to work in anything. If I want to tell something or play something, I just do it. The division is a fictional thing. Being a singer. Being a actor. Even about women and men, about love. All of them are human-made frameworks. I decided to cut them off and focus on being an artist in my own way.

Mint: Do you think you'll change more in the future?

Jeff: I can't answer for the future. It may changed. But now... I don't know. Maybe I will be more open or maybe narrow down until I can find something that truly fits me. In this moment, I feel like the more I open, the more I can see clearer what fits me and what not. Where and how much I can add myself into the works. At the end of the day, all the 6 songs I released are totally different but they all are my songs and they are me today.

Mint: Are you happy with your old works?

Jeff: I'm very happy. I'm happy with everything I've done, even with my old works.

Mint: Since the day you joined Be On Cloud, do you feel like you have grown up?

Jeff: I've grown up a lot. Working with Be On Cloud has been one of the most important moments in my life. Their work culture have made me grown a lot. P'Pong has taught me how to grow up, how to change in terms of working methods and how to think as well, not only as an artist but also as a person who wants to follow a direction as a CEO.

Mint: What's do you think is the difference between Be On Cloud and Warner’s work culture?

Jeff: P'Pond is a very creative person, he's an artist whose projects are very sexy. I got a lot of great things from him, both as an artist and as an executive, and it has a balanced level of familiarity and professionalism.

Warner is being very professional since the beginning, and as time goes on, it's becoming a family with the Global Company system. Although it's a professional style, you can feel the human touch and the love is put into work.

Mint: Personally, what kind of working culture are you most comfortable with?

Jeff: I like both. They have different advantages, so I decided I want to try it for myself. And Studio on Saturn was born, wich is a Jeff Satur Management Company (laughs). It's a co-management with Warner Music, which means I'm in charge of the creative direction and they will help me to make them come true.

Mint: Has working with these two companies changed you?

Jeff: I think the change has to do more with myself and being working in different genres. The more I open up, the more I feel myself, and the more I have the desire to be myself. Especially when I look back to my acting roles, I feel like there are still parts that I want to expand and play on the stage. I started to see clearly what I like in the show. For example my last MV has a lot of me personally than the first MV I released. Working with Be On Cloud and Warner Music have encouraged me and let me dare to be myself.

Mint: So before that, you didn't dare to be yourself?

Jeff: I didn't dare. In the past, I was quite afraid of how others would look at me. I was afraid that people would categorize me in a way that I didn't want to. So I didn't dare to do anything. For example, it took me 3 years to upload my first video on YouTube, because it was easier just to sit in front of the mirror and play the guitar comfortably, without lightning or a camera. It turns out you have to be the one who dares to take yourself out, just by yourself.

Mint: Why didn't you dare to be yourself back then?

Jeff: I think it was because I didn't know how to be myself. I used to not believe what I thought was right. Some cultures make you think that being yourself is not always right. For example, when I was a kid, if I painted my nails or wore eyeliner, I would be teased by my friends. The society didn't empower me to be myself. At home, my mum supported me but when I was outside, the society looked at me in a different way.

Nowadays, there is a lot of talk about gender diversity and beauty standards. I think it has opened many doors for everyone to dare to be themselves more without having to care about what people think/say.

Mint: So we can say that Jeff is being himself now.

Jeff: Yes, in the past, when I was on stage, I was myself but at the same time, I was worried if I was singing right or if I was performing right. If I had to walk or stay still. If I had to come back to the middle of the stage... It turned out that the focus was wrong. Even if I still focus on the work, I can say that I'm 100% myself.

For example my last concert ended without me even realizing it (laughs). The audience probably felt the same way. It went so quickly that I didn't even have time to think anything. I just performed.

Mint: What do you get from Kinnporsche?

Jeff: I always get something back to be someone other than myself. Whether from 'Kim' in KinnPorsche or 'Dan' that I played in the drama "Closer", they always teach me something. From Kim's character I got the courage from him without knowing it. I developed some skills and now they're part of me implicitly. I dare to be myself because Kim's courage came to me.

Mint: You're famous now. Is it what you were waiting for?

Jeff: I don't think I'm famous but my work is more widely known. But it's not something I was yearning for (laughs) I just want people to listen to my music. I want these songs to reach them. What I'm most proud of is that my work has inspired others. I used to write a blog and the message of my blog has helped many people who wanted to commit suicide and I got messages back to tell me they feel better because of my work. No matter what kind of work, but I feel like this is the essence of being an artist. I want my work to inspire others. That's what means to be an artist for me.

Mint: How much does Jeff Satur value his fame today?

Jeff: I value the work. Some people may look at how-well known you are as a success, which it's not wrong, but I feel if you pay attention to how famous you are, you will have the wrong focus. If you're chasing after fame, it will never come to you. But if you work for doing a good job, then the fame will eventually be there. The most important thing is don't compete with other, compete with yourself. Also, fame will be gone one day, and Jeff Satur will not be here forever. But as long as I can be someone's inspiration and sell produce good works, then I will do my best.

Mint: Do you think Kinnporshe has helped people to get to know you?

Jeff: Very much, very much. It's being one of the most important turning points in my life. Including the song "Why don't you stay" has make people to get to know me and listen to my other songs as well. It has pushed me both in my acting career and my music career.

Mint: Have you ever felt sorry that people didn't know you before Kinporsche?

Jeff: I think everything has its own time. If I listen to "Afraid to say" now, I would need to cover my ears (laughs). I felt it was not the right time. I have improved my singing a lot as well as my confidence, which back then was not as strong as today. The stage is my safe place now, and I feel so relaxed on it. I can live there. So I would say everything, including my perception, is at the perfect time. Not better, not worse, but just perfect. It's the best moment.

Mint: Have KinnPorsche The Series World Tour 2023 help you to support your next step?

Jeff: It has helped. The World Tour allowed me to meet people that I don't usually meet like fans abroad. There are places like Taipei, Vietnam or Singapore that I'd never been to, But once I went and I could see how there are people who actually listen to my songs and they sing in Thai is wow, so there is an opportunity to do a World Tour.

Mint: We’ve seen you being more playful on stage, what gives you the courage to unlock this part of you?

Jeff: I've said before that fans like to do memes with my face, right? Like when they find something funny or hilarious. They do like everything about me, even the parts I don't like at all, so I don't have to be cool all the time if I can make them happy anyway. In fact, we're crazy people. When I go to stage, it's the same. I'm tired of "oh, the camera is here, give me a good angle" (laughs)

Mint: Your first solo concert is the starting point or a checkpoint?

Jeff: It's the end of the last chapter. It's the beginning of a new chapter and the end of the last chapter. Oh, what a poet! (laughs). I never thought I could tell the story of my life at the beginning of my concert. The VCR is like a video that I wrote about what I experienced when I was a child, what I used to play and what kind of music I used to hear. There I was playing with Joey, then I was playing the harp, and listening to Korean music too. Perhaps people don't know it, but I'm a Korean music fan, so I picked all of these things to tell. There are many things in my life that have been conveyed through this concert.

Mint: Was your first idea for the VCR like this?

Jeff: Have you ever watched Evangelion? It's an anime and the ending is very confusing, but I think the idea was cool, so I though Why don't I try to tell life stories? Think about it like a sound is made with a story, so every sound has a story, and everyone has a different sound, but also I have a sound that I've collected unconsciously. I want to tell people that there are sounds for everyone. Sometimes there are songs that sound bad but there are not bad songs. There isn't a sad song for everyone or a love song for everyone. it's just one of your songs.

As for the sound of tearing the screen... At that time, I thought it was a cool idea (laughs). That part is dark, right, and then it starts tearing. I explained it to my team and everyone was confused so I got acrylics colors and black paper and I painted it to show them what I wanted and they finally got it. I watched that scene a lot of times and everyone was like, "hey, what's going on?" (laughs). It was just like I imagined in my head, but I didn't do it in the middle of the stage as I wanted at first.

Mint: How do you handle your ideas when you're working with others?

Jeff: First of all, I write them down. Write them all over my phone no matter if they're good or bad ideas. But write them down first. Then, the next day I will check them to see if there's something that works. As for the moment when I have to show them to others... sometimes I have problems explaining them so I have to make them first to see what it will be like. But everyone is always respectful and understand it.

Mint: In addition to this idea, you also chose all the songs for the setlist.

Jeff: Yes, I chose all of them and put them together. The videos, the ideas, the outfits, the set... I feel like people will think that the performance is very serious, but it's a place for us. I feel like I live on stage because it's my safe zone so I want it to represent me.

Mint: Why did you decide to put the song "ไม่กล้าบอกชัด" (Afraid to say) on the setlist?

Jeff: It's a reminder of the beginning. I've reached a safest point, the middle, but this song is part of me and it reminds me of my childhood and how he's known as Jeff Satur now, so why not sing the first song that made me known? I sang this first song with him in the back of my mind. We're far away and maybe he can't see us clearly but I sang that song with him. Slowly I've come forward and end up on a stage, so it was like meeting him with the first song.

Mint: You are involved in every step of your work so, do you get obsessed with the result?

Jeff: It's hard, like in the music video, I sat and edited it as well. I sat and use an editing program to tap and see the frames because I wanted the image in my head to come out as straight as possible. P'Pan, who is the director, helped me. If my idea wasn't working, I had P'Pan to guide me. He listened to my idea and my story and helped me to write it, so I have to thank him very much.

Mint: What else will we see in the next step?

Jeff: There are many things that I can't say but I'm very excited to try out. I still want to try to play in a movie which it's something I've never done before. I have some collab projects with a thai artist and with a foreign artist too, which I never thought he would want to collaborate with me. And there are places that I've never been and I'm very excited to go. I can't say anything right now but it's coming very soon. Everybody will slowly see it like reading a novel and wondering what the next chapter will tell (laughs).

Mint: Anything you'd like to say to the future Jeff Satur in 2 years?

Jeff: Live a happy life because you owe me one.

#jeff satur #jeff interview #mint magazine #translation #i finished it!!!! #yaaayyy!!!

[lilyrizzy]

elaborate on ur thoughts for maxiel on married at first sight 👀

okay, never in a million years do i think max would ever go on reality tv BUT my thoughts if he did under the cut

okay so obviously they see each other for the first time at the wedding and i think the level of attraction is different. like, initially daniel is like, 'okay, he's kinda cute, i can work with this,' whereas max is like, 'oh my god, this man is so beautiful, he is perfect, wow.' but the problem is, max doesn't show that. in fact, max doesnt show much of ANYTHING to begin with, at least not in the way daniel is used to.

because daniel is good at performing right, so when it comes to the vows, he's cracking jokes, making max's mum and victoria laugh (obvs j*s is not there), saying the cheesy shit they all say like 'i knew i wanted to marry you from the moment i met you,' and 'this is a leap of faith but i'm ready to jump with you, baby,' whereas max is like taking it very seriously, almost to the point of like... not seeming into it? like he says stuff like, 'i will try to like you, i hope also that you will like me, i want to be a very good husband,' because thats the truth! he cant lie and say like, he wants to spend his life with daniel, because he doesnt know him yet. but to daniel it seems a little...cold, so he's not sure how to feel about his new husband.

at the reception, max is even more awkward, doesn't know how to start conversation and barely answers the questions daniel asks him.

'what music do you like?' 'i do not listen to a lot of music.'

'what do you do for fun?' 'i like to play fifa.'

'what do you do for a job?' 'i am a car mechanic.'

and daniel is sinking lower and lower into his chair like, fuck, what have i done, i've got to spend the next few weeks with a guy who clearly doesnt have any social skills. meanwhile, max is like, wow, daniel wants to know so much about me:) he is a good listener:) he is doing all the talking because he can tell this is hard for me:) or something lol. doesnt realise hes being rude, he just- he cant do this with the camera in his face, okay?

then in the bedroom, on their wedding night max realises that maye its not been going as well as he thought because he tries to kiss daniel, but daniel just laughs, stepping away gently and saying, 'guess ill take the couch right?' because he thinks that. well max is really young? what if hes just in this for the fame, the quick money, what if hes doing this now because he feels he has to? daniel doesnt want it to be like that, okay. its not what hes here for. but to max, he's like. oh:(. he'd thought- but of course daniel doesnt want to sleep in the bed with him, because look at him and look at daniel.

then i think the misscommunication continues for a bit of their honeymoon. they both think the other doesnt like each other, and max says even less now because if daniel doesnt want to even kiss him, then what is the point trying to be husbands? so they avoid each other a little, until daniel eventually thinks, fuck it, i gotta *try*, because he cant have max say leave and go home in the first week okay? his friends (michael) bullied him so badly for doing this, so it has to be worth it.

so he sneaks max out to some romantic beach picnic without the cameras (btw theyre in the caribbean or something idk), gets them both tipsy and he asks, 'why did you even come on the show?' and because the cameras arent here, max can be honest and say, 'my sister, she has two babies. and i tried to find somebody who would want this also, but with me. but always, men wanted sex and then when instead i tried to go for breakfast the next day, they would just laugh and leave. maybe it is because i am bad at it, but i did not do it at all for a long time, because my dad-'

and then max breaks off, and daniel tugs him into his arms and is like, 'its okay max. somebody to build a life with, thats what i wanted too.' then he kisses max, and it's not like on the wedding day, a peck in front of their parents, it's deep and there's tongue and max can't help but push for more and more, to push daniel back into the sand and grind against him until daniel is like, 'why dont i be the judge of how bad you really are?' and then they have like, mindblowing sex over and over, for the rest of the honeymoon.

and im not saying the sex like, fixes everything, but i think max feeling wanted sexually by daniel soothes a lot of the insecurities inside him that were making it hard for him to open up to him in other ways? like the next morning in bed he's a little shy when daniel cracks a load of jokes about how very much not bad in bed he is, but he’s also laughing and laughing, and when daniel starts a conversation over breakfast, suddenly max is chatting his ear off. and he is still is a little awkward infront of the cameras, but in private, they start to build something real. he can banter back with daniel now, give as good as he gets, even if the jokes are dorky and not funny to anyone else. to daniel they're cute and because he knows what max was like before, he can see how hard max is trying.

and daniel doesnt know when it happens, but one day everythinggg max does just becomes endearing. all of max's little quirks, his bluntness, his black and white thinking, daniel realises this is max and he really really likes max. max isnt pumping his tires because he wants something from daniel, he genuinely thinks daniel is hilarious and sexy and kind. and because daniel knows this, he feels he can be *real* with max, in a way hes never been before? like, max likes daniel the showman, but he also just likes daniel.

i genuinely think its like, a whirlwind romance after that. they tell each other they love each other before they even come back from the honeymoon, the viewers at home are rolling their eyes declaring it will never last.

but it does :) after the initial struggle, they become the low maintenance couple that just vibe the whole time lol. daniel waffle's about how much they get on with each other at each comittment ceremony, while max is like, 'yes things are good:)' and dies inside the time the intimacy expert asks if theyve had sex or not, and how was it. daniel just winks and says no complaints, but refuses to give anymore away bc thats private and he knows max doesnt want it out there.

the only time they get into any drama is when daniel sticks up for max, declaring his love publically to the group for the first time, when one of the girls is being mean and saying that max has the personality of a cabbage and she doesnt understand what daniel sees in him. or when max (bc he’s defo the one to get put with the girls even though it should be daniel) gets a little outwardly jealous when all the girls answer 'daniel' when asked who they think the hottest husband is at those awkward group days (shoutout to the episode that aired just haha) but inside he’s preening, like, hell yeah, thats my man.

then when it ends, they post an update on insta like, yeah we are still together, here are our two cats & also we got married for real:)

the end lol

#what even is this lmao #i wrote this in 15 minutes so like #enjoy my terrible grammar and spelling #sorry its so long oops #max/daniel #fic #kinda #look lorna i wrote an au!

[slasher-male-wife]

hello hello ! been a while since ive requested. could i get og micheal, thomas hewitt, jason, and the sinclaires with a really out-there gothic bf? im talking the whole nine miles, extravagante makeup, very gothic clothes, loud goth music, all of it. i just wanna see what their reactions would be! thank you :]

also shhhhh take the dabloons i gave you, even if it isnt applicable on tumblr. please i have too many dabloons i must share my wealth.

- 🫀

Of course I can heart anon. So I was goth for about a year before I just kind of wasn't interested in it anymore and I've had my fair share of out there looks. I've dyed my hair every color under the rainbow, I've drawn on horrible big eyeliner, etc. But I still hold an interest in goth looks, music, etc.

Slashers with an out there, goth male reader

Includes: Og Michael Myers, Thomas Hewitt, Jason Voorhees, and the Sinclair brothers

Warnings: Slashers being a little mean, mentions of self harm and mental health issues, mentions of stalking, kinda implied Stockholm syndrome

Og Michael Myers

Now Michael first started stalking you because of how out there you looked. He was so curious about your big hair and huge eyeliner.

He'd watch you very often, learning that this is just how you are and not actually a costume. This just drew him in even more.

Now as for when you start dating Michael will be a little jealous because of all the attention you're getting from strangers. He doesn't care how you dress it's the fact that other people feel the need to comment on it and constantly look at you that bothers him.

He's not too confused about why a man is wearing makeup because he doesn't fully understand gender norms but he still wonders why you do it.

I know goth music is a wide set of genres but I feel like he'd like the slow and dark music. He honestly might put on a few of your records if you're out and he's at home.

Overall Michael doesn't care so much how you dress but it is something he likes and thinks you should keep doing.

Thomas Hewitt

I wouldn't say he's scared the first time he sees you but he is kinda freaked out. Thomas is a sheltered Christian man so seeing someone like you is freaky for him. Although if he sees you wearing rosary's he's feeling a little better.

After getting to actually know you he sees that you're not that scary and that he doesn't really mind how you look. Although his family will give you odd looks and rude comments about how men shouldn't wear makeup.

As for the music Thomas is a little sacred. I know that everyone thinks he would listen to metal but if we're being honest he was raised on country music and gospel music. He doesn't mind your music it's just new and a little scary.

He'll also worry about you getting hot in all black clothing. He'll try to get you to wear lighter colors but will give up when he realizes that it's not going to happen anytime soon.

Jason Voorhees

Pamela warned him about people like you. Goth's, who according to her are all depressed and cut themselves. But upon meeting you Jason learns that's not true. You're actually pretty happy and you just enjoy dark music and clothes.

He'll watch every morning that you put on makeup. He loves seeing your process as you create thin sharp eyebrows and big black eyeliner. A little confused about why a man is wearing makeup but he honestly doesn't care too much about it

He doesn't mind the music. I feel like Jason never really listens to music anyway so this isn't too big of a deal for him

He's also glad that you don't really mind being around death. Obviously he's going to keep you away from the people he kills but it at least means that you're not going to hate him for it.

He's a little freaked out by the music. No one he's come across has had this kind of music before so it's new to him. Start off slow with The cure and Siouxsie and the Banshees.

Vincent Sinclair

Out of all of the Sinclair brothers he's the most supportive. His mother would have hated you and he loves that. Especially if you have dyed hair, piercing and or tattoos.

Speaking of dyed hair, if you have it he's obsessed with it. He'll convince Bo to go buy you more when your roots grow out and he'll help you with dying it.

He loves goth music. He loves the instrumental elements and how dramatic it sounds. I have a feeling if you gave him pictures of what some goth musicans look like he'll make some of the wax figures look like them.

He'll steal clothes from victims if he thinks you'll like the clothes and probably makes some accesories for you. He'll kinda treat you like a goth barbie doll with how he want's to constantly dress you up and do your makeup.

If his brothers ever make any kind of rude comments he's quick to shut them down. He loves you so much and he won't let Bo give you shit for wearing makeup.

Bo Sinclair

I'm not gonna lie, he's gonna think it's a sex thing. You quickly shut that down and he realizes you just genuinly like the style and music. But he also never even knew about the music element.

But like Vincent he thinks his mother would hate you and he loves that. Probably one of the reasons he keeps you alive.

He'll think you're a little gay for wearing makeup but point out how he is literally dating a man and he'll quiet down really quick.

Doesn't mind the music and will probably start listening to some of the bands you listen to as well.

He doesn't get the fashion and thinks it's just for attention but over time he won't care as much and understand it's more about self expression.

While he does (lovingly) make fun of you for being goth. If anyone else does it, especially a victim he's not having mercy on them. Sure he thinks you look ridiculous sometimes but only he can say that.

If you have piercings and tattoos he will encourage you to get more. Maybe will drop the idea of getting his named tattooed but if you don't want it then he won't force it.

Lester Sinclair

You scare him a little. But after talking for a little bit and seeing how sweet you actually are, he falls for you very hard.

Again, like his brothers he loves you even more because his mother would hate you.

Thinks your music is scary but he won't tell you that.

Loves watching you get ready and how you turn from some normal dude into a super hot vampire.

He loves to play with your hair if it's big and teased up. He knows it's crunchy form hairspray but please let him touch it Y/n.

Will gift you things made of bones and animal skins that he thinks look gothic. He's glad to have an s/o who's so into death. It makes it easy for him to talk to you about his job.

Will defend you against his brothers. Lester won't put up with Bo calling you freaky or asking if you cut yourself. Honestly I can see him getting physical with Bo if it gets to that point of him being an asshole.

#michael myers x y/n #michael myers #michael myers x you #thomas hewitt #thomas hewitt x you #thomas hewitt x y/n #thomas hewitt x reader #vincent sinclair #vincent sinclair x reader #vincent sinclair x you #vincent sinclair x y/n #bo sinclair #bo sinclair x reader #bo sinclair x y/n #bo sinclair x you #lester sinclair #lester sinclair x reader #lester sinclair x you #lester sinclair x y/n #slasher x y/n #slasher x reader #slasher fanfiction #jason voorhees #jason voorhees x reader

[cinemaglow]

This isn't going to be very coherent I'm sorry. I'm not a Buck-Tick superfan. I very easily *could* be but I've held myself back since I don't really have the time and energy to invest and become voraciously obsessed with a band like when I was younger. I haven't listened to all their albums. I've only watched or read a few translated interviews. Idk why I feel like I have to preface this post like this. I guess it's just weird that this is the most profoundly affected I've been by a musician's death in years, and I don't even have the encyclopedic knowledge that I do for some other musicians to have built a parasocial relationship on. I think it speaks for the depths of the beauty that Sakurai contained, that even while maintaining a respectful distance and just catching a surface level glinpse of his inner life he was so, so compelling. And even though I never learned a lot about his personal life I feel a kinship with him.

There are a few bands that have changed my life, not just in a general sense but in specific, measurable ways. Buck-Tick is one of them. I've had treatment resistant depression for most of my life. In 2020 I was, not as actively suicidal as I have occasionally been, but just so so tired and hopeless. I couldn't imagine a future for myself and I was fully prepared to never get out of bed again until I starved and decomposed. Somebody shared a picture of Sakurai on tumblr. I don't remember who or why or what picture but I thought he was compelling and beautiful and me being always a slut for men with long hair I was like 👀👀👀 and that's what led me to Buck-Tick.

Discovering Buck-Tick in late 2020 convinced me to keep fighting for my life. In fact it was reading the translation of these particular lyrics that literally gave my an epiphany or an internal eucatastrophe, like something fundamentally changed in the workings of my brain and the trajectory of my life made a sharp turn:

Your living heartbeat in this world is ephemeral, but it’s beautiful

The living heartbeat of everything in this world is ephemeral, but even so it shines

Your living heartbeat in this world—there’s nothing sad at all

A person I love can live in this world—there’s nothing sad at all

It's honestly kind of cheesy that something can change your outlook so immediately but I remember distinctly realizing that living depressed and miserable is still being a living person and therefore an expression of the goodness and beauty in the universe. I sobbed. I felt truly glad to be alive for the first time in a long, long time. I posted as much on facebook, so you could actually go back and find the exact date it happened. Anyway. I accepted that even if I never get completely better it's still worth fighting to be a bit better. I started grad school. I've made it alive through a lot of rancid shit associated with grad school. I still feel an underlying current of hope and ?cosmic joy? even when my more immediate mental health takes a nosedive because my fundamental view of the world has changed.

People who are a lot more knowledgeable about Sakurai's personal life than I am are posting about how even though he struggled deeply all his life he always fought to live, to find the beauty inherent in living, and that mindset clearly came through in his words and music, because he transmitted it to me. He was so, so beautiful, his mind, voice, countenance, artistry.....he and the rest of the band gave me a blueprint for aging fabulously when I literally couldn't picture myself being middle aged. I think he did a good job, with everything. I kind of feel the same way now as I did when I found out about a friend's suicide earlier this year. Like, it's all okay for him, on his end. One of my spiritual beliefs is that death is a reward, a well earned rest after engaging in the Sacred Work of living. Even if it's a few decades earlier than expected Sakurai deserves to rest after all he's given and I'm happy for him. It's the rest of us that have lost something. It's like we have one less star in the sky. I kind of had a dream that maybe I could make so stage clothes for him one day but oh well.

I was up for several hours just kind of numb last night after I heard the news so I am going to get something to eat and go back to bed for a bit (being unemployed does come with privileges haha). I'm feeling a lot more at peace now than I was last night. Later on I'm going to take a shower and then paint my nails, which seems like the best thing I can do at the moment to honor him. And I'm going to keep living, and making beautiful gothy clothes, and putting more beauty out into the world and appreciating the beauty that is always there no matter what happens.

#death #celebrity death #long post #sakurai atsushi

[sushisocks]

hi i just finished rdr2, really love your stuff (FINALLY a blog that properly info dumps!! keep them coming please!!). i don't know if this is your thing, but the song I Gave You All by Mumford & Sons makes me think of arthur so much because each lyric corresponds so perfectly to his ending. obviously it's in the song title (arthur's "i gave you all i had"), but the lines "how can you say that your truth is better than ours?" and "you rip out all i had just to say that you've have won" makes me wonder what arthur's last thoughts really were?? the song has a very bitter tone, which is opposite of the game, but i can't actually tell what arthur's last words are supposed to mean, especially with him repeating "i tried...i did." were the "i dids" meant to be a plead for mercy (to remind dutch of his lifelong loyalty in hopes that he's spared from a violent death) or was it meant to be sympathetic (to indicate that they were both doomed men who were only trying their best)? or was it an apology, like "i did all i could, but it wasn't enough"? knowing his level of self esteem/guilt i think arthur would feel a very heavy obligation and responsibility, so it makes sense for him to say "i did all i could, but it still wasn't enough because i was not good enough," but he seemed to be very accepting of his death. sorry if this was rambly/late to the party, i would love to hear your thoughts about it!!!

Oh, Anon, this is the sort of thing I LOVE seeing in my askbox, I am kissing you on the lips rn for giving me the permission to talk about this so lets TALK about it!! (Sorry it took me a minute to get to it, I had to rotate ur questions in my mind for a bit so I could best formulate my thoughts, you know how it is)

First off, I Gave You All by Mumford & Sons is SUCH a good RDR2/Arthur song, I agree hugely on this, and it makes a LOT of sense for the ending notes, especially on a High Honor/Save John run. I've been listening to it on repeat since I saw ur ask, all while typing this up, and I got a lil emotional at times man. I love music recs and while I know some Mumford & Sons songs this was a recontextualization I very much needed in my life thank u <3

The rest of this is LONG so putting in a read more to save my mutuals lol

Okay, so, I now have a LOT of thoughts about what's going through Arthur's mind and what he might've meant at the end of his last mission, so lets get into it. To begin with I want to list out the lines that are said in this scene, so we're all on the same page. (Helpfully and lovingly pulled from the gamescripts wiki blog, which my life has revolved around for the past year and a half)

Dutch van der Linde: It is over now… Arthur. It’s over. Arthur Morgan: Oh, Dutch… he’s a rat. You know it and I know it. Micah Bell: He’s sick… he’s dying… he’s talking crazy. Pinkerton: There! Up there on the ridge! Arthur Morgan: (to Dutch) I gave you all I had… I did. Dutch van der Linde: I… Micah Bell: Come on. Dutch… let’s go, buddy. We made it. We won. Come on. Arthur Morgan: John made it. He’s the only one. Rest of us… no. But… I tried. In the end… I did. Micah Bell: (to Dutch) Come on… let's go. We can make it. Come on, Dutch… come on!

So WHAT is going on here? Surface level, this is the last appeal to Dutch. The last battle of wills between Micah and Arthur, where Arthur is STILL trying to make Dutch see sense. I think it's an important part of Arthur's character to understand that he believes, until the very bitter end, that there's a chance for him to reach through to Dutch. It's the main reason he heads back to camp, after saving Abigail. Milton has told him Micah is the rat, and Arthur believes that if he can just get back to camp and tell Dutch the truth, that will be it. He, erroneously, believes his word alone will be enough.

But the thing is, in my opinion, in a way Arthur is RIGHT! He DOES reach through to Dutch, but he has to die for it. That is what the "I gave you all I had" line is for.

It is Dutch, unsure who to believe. It is Micah, screaming for Dutch to listen to him. And it is Arthur, gently reminding Dutch: I devoted my entire life to you, all that I know has been with you, all that I am has come from you.

Arthur would have gone to the ends of the Earth for Dutch -- he would be grumbling and complaining the entire time, but he'd still do it if Dutch asked. He is, in this moment, telling Dutch, I gave you all I had and you took it, there is nothing left but my death, what reason do I have to lie?

It is the crack in the wall, a small moment of clarity for Dutch, which has him leave them both on that cliff, which has him turn up again 8 years later and kill Micah. Not enough to turn on Micah right away, but enough to truly have Dutch stop and reconsider. Because with those words Arthur is not only speaking on his own behalf, whether or not he knows it. He is reminding Dutch of everyone else who has died for him; Grimshaw, Molly, and Hosea, as the most notable ones, I think. Arthur slots neatly in with those three as people who truly devoted their everything to Dutch, gave him all they had, of life and time and energy, and were served nothing but death, destruction, and heartache in return.

It stuns Dutch; for once he is truly speechless, having to reckon with Arthur's words and what they mean, what they imply. Micah knows Arthur's words are more impactful, and keeps trying to sway him to his side, for ends we can only really guess at. But we already know there's no chance Dutch will go with Micah at this point. But he also wont stay with Arthur.

Then: "John made it. He’s the only one. Rest of us… no. But… I tried. In the end… I did."

One of Arthur's main objectives in Chapter 6 is saving as many people of the gang as possible. The Pinkertons are closing in and, while Arthur believes that it's just bad luck until Milton tells him otherwise, he still hopes for the best outcome possible, for the women and children, as he says.

Which is why he says John made it. Because to Arthur, John's making it, means the women and children making it. It means Abigail, Tilly, Sadie, and Jack, all waiting at Copperhead Landing, are not waiting in vain. It is the reassurance that they will be fine, and the idea that John might finally actually step up and be the father Arthur has so desperately wanted him to be for Jack. To Arthur, John making it is the best outcome.

But he still wanted to save as many people as possible. Dutch, Javier, and Bill included. They were still Arthur's friends and family. They still mattered to him. But I think Arthur realizes, dying upon that cliff, that there's no way out for them anymore. They'll get off this mountain and continue their way of living, and the government will keep hunting them. He is essentially saying the rest of them are just as doomed as Arthur is, even if Arthur is the one currently dying. And he tried.

I want to say that Arthur saying he tried, is both about saving the gang, and about being better. There are SO many interactions you can have in chapter 6 alone that's about being better than you were. Edith Downes, Sister Calderòn, Charles, Rains Fall, and Mary-Beth are just SOME that I can think of, at the top of my head. I think in this moment, Arthur is reaffirming to himself that at the very least he tried. He did everything he could, in the time that he had. He doesn't know if that's enough, or if it means more than what it is, but he tried, and that, to him, HAS to mean something.

It is him accepting that this is the end, and that he doesn't know!! He genuinely doesn't!! If he has done enough to actually change the course of events!! But God do I love the message of Arthur finding peace in having tried. In having done what he could, and seeing what changes he could, and knowing in that last breath, watching that rising sun, that he did make a difference.

Do I think Arthur is angry or bitter when he passes? Not in a High Honor/Save John run, no. I think he is disappointed and sad with Dutch. But I also think he has found a place within himself where he can accept that this is it, for him. And he is hopeful for those whom he has saved, who got out of there and live to see another day.

He gave his all, and he really really tried, and he finds peace in the end. How simultaneously heartbreaking and heartening isn't that?

#mannn now im emotional #i hope this all made sense HAHAH jesus #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #arthur morgan #dutch van der linde #micah bell #rdr2 meta #rdr thoughts #teki talks #bitches be ranting (im bitches) #i LOVED this though my askbox is ALWAYS open for stuff like this #and ALSO music recs if u have songs or playlists for rdr2 or ships or characters pleaseeeeee i love music give me that shit NOW #asks #rdr asks #meta asks