#ground and think again

[chappellrroan]

people who still hate Joe Alwyn need to get a life asap

#i said what i said #so many bad takes you guys are acting like he forcibly locked her up for two years when she chose it herself and she was happy with the #decision sure things ended and maybe it wasn't very best breakup or wtv but holy shit do you realise the speculations you make are so #fucking invasive the same thing you hate the other people doing to taylor's life and not to remind you that you have zero fucking clue of #what goes on behind the scenes you take these bits and pieces of crumb and exaggerate it to something so much worse #mind you this was the same man y'all worshipped before the breakup oh because he was the epitome of calm gentleman #and now i see a post with tags “go out fucking loser” like wow. just wow. #not to mention how his humanitarian act of signing ceasefire got turned around to thing about taylor like guys. guys. big news. but #advocating against genocide and accepting all the blacklash that comes with it isn't that simple maybe pic up that brain from football #ground and think again

[inkskinned]

they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?

they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.

you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.

you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.

mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.

you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.

#writeblr #warm up #to be clear let me state again: i think you should id however you fucking want if it helps you seek peace #but there is a HUGE difference between being like '.... im undiagnosed but i think i might be X' #and a person who is like ''omg my intrusive thoughts made me buy a birkin!!!'' #babe mine made me throw up bc they disgusted me so much <3 #mine made me hurt myself evenly. even when i wanted to stop. i have had to put my hand on the stove MULTIPLE TIMES #and again i'd rather have 10000 people get help for something they don't need help for #than have 1 kid NOT get help #but there has GOTTTTT to be a middle ground here #bc at this point it isn't ''raising awareness'' #it's . fucking misinformation. and ''what this picture says about you!!!!!'' #& yes! im mostly talkin about ppl who are actually disgusted and offended by signs of mental illness #but use it to defend THEIR actions #like babe you hate when kids start yelling in the walmart? but you YOuRSELF can yell? #you are depressed so it's fine you were cruel to your spouse? #but if your spouse spends too much time in bed she's a lazy fuck? #your partner needs to do everything for you bc of your history in trauma? but when SHE has needs she's being clingy and gross? #HUGE difference here between whom i think most of my followers are btw. like #all it takes is fucking anyyyy empathy or kindness . like. #anyway it's hard to explain im hoping we all know the person im talking about lol

[vaguely-concerned]

sometimes I think of all the on-the-surface warm, well-meaning but deeply ineffectual advice and attention john gives harrow through harrow the ninth (make some soup and get some sleep! get a hobby! don't be so hard on yourself! self care harrow! as long as I need take no actual responsibility in this relationship whatsoever I would have loved to be your dad!) set up against the stark truth that with his other hand he has been staging her attempted horrific murder again and again and again like a living nightmare on the logic that it will 'put her down or fix her'. and then I find that I wish there is a hell. a special hell where twitch streamers turned necromantic death emperors go

#the locked tomb #harrowhark nonagesimus #john gaius #harrow the ninth #this is why I don't buy john as misunderstood and initially well-meaning AT ALL #this is a pattern you see with him again and again and again -- right down to his interpersonal relationships #(and indeed it's in the more grounded interpersonal relationships you can most clearly see him as he is I think #the fantasy death empire of a thousand years doesn't register quite as viscerally because it's like. heightened; not quite real #but the emotional violence and manipulation that surrounds him? oh boy that is EXTREMELY real and scarily well-observed) #there's a premeditation to so much of what he does (contracts with planets that only end 'in the event of the emperor's death' anyone? #yeah john we get it you're hilarious and I wish you weren't) #the greatest trick john ever pulled was making anyone think he's just a lil guy. what does he know he's only god #when you first read the book the complete callousness of the other adults is so horrible that john seems like an oasis of care #(though you start to get this uneasy feeling when that care never seems to translate to like... relief or soothing or resolution) #and it makes it feel almost obscene when you find out what's actually going on #it's the mercy & augustine enabler hour but at least they're completely honest in their cruelty there #while john is -- well he sure is being john huh #this is just me being angry with him btw philosophically I don't think this is how the story will or should end #(with john slam dunked right into hell that is) #it's just... harrow is so vulnerable. and what he does to her is so insidious and fucked up #john is very deeply human. unfortunately the capacity to quite simply suck so much is deeply human too

[heartorbit]

HAPPY NEWONDERHOY YEAR 🍡

#its still jan 1st somewhere . right #HAPPY NEW YEAR. HAPPY NEW YURI #project sekai #pjsk #an shiraishi #prsk #tsukasa tenma #proseka #Hatsune amiky acolorful Stage[FOGHORN] #inknow i csnt write kanji OK stroke order has me fucked up #redraw of last years to thank them both for arriving with 30k gems to spare vut i [cough] i [wheeze] #i kind of think last years was. more slayful...[throws a smokebomb and when it clears im laying unconscious on the ground] #OK last year i remember literally drawing that for like 13 hours snd the anstomy isnt goo so whatevvrr #my life is so jover january 10th btw EMU. {EMU. EMU. EMU #WAAAAH #college starts that week but heh.. luckily my class ends before the event. here we go again #and then nenesnlim and the ruis lim and then (redacted) right after and then peace. and then CORALINTHHEBIX AND WEDDIGN EMU ANDPANDMONIUM A #and i have miku expo and a convention in may.. ehhhahe #im finish um one cosplay hopefilyl for cny but thenother ummm stipid fuckifng tdukasa maybe ill finish it for showtime event mahbe not #i hate her. to the shredder #EMU. oooh emu. Ok sorry goodnight

[dykealloy]

such a small detail but I cannot stop thinking about law leaving kikoku by luffy's bedside when he went out to talk with hancock and ivankov. idk it stirs up a lot of questions. like does law do this often? does law, like zoro, talk to his well-behaved cursed sword like "kikoku, sit. watch." before he leaves to go have lunch or a well deserved twenty minute post-surgery nap. is this the protective equivalent to leaving a baseball bat by the bedside? doctor's bedside manner emotional support blade? but then I also can't help but notice that it's unsheathed. which... actually, who is that sword protecting really, just sitting there? did luffy wake up more than once in the cradle of that submarine while his body was still recovering? (drugged up to the gills, entirely noncoherent, unable to be reasoned with, going in and out of consciousness, the only thought running through his mind being "ace"). probably would've been a nightmare for the heart crew

#touches the soil. what happened here #thinking about ohmilk's 'i took care of you' piece again #edit: ive been kindly informed that in japan. historically. leaving a sword in the ground was a sign of respect for the fallen. #so law was likely doing this as a sign of respect for ace. specifically since it was placed next to luffy #which is all very nice of law and heartbreaking but i still like to speculate on the layers to this action #CJ's op watch-through #one piece #op #lawlu #monkey d. luffy #straw hat luffy #monkey d luffy #trafalgar law #surgeon of death #op meta #op analysis

[larabar]

sonic voice would you guys still love me if i was a horse

#keep seeing designs going around and wanted to try my hand at it hehe #love the pegasus ones but i think he likes the ground #i believe my inspo for the mark was natalie haines' mlp cover with sonic on it. ill have to find it again #mad i didnt do the right gait for the running one thats probably more of a trot. but hey it was fun #all of em were #sth #sonic the hedgehog #super sonic #mlp

[mobius-m-mobius]

He'll make it back.

Loki 1x05 // 2x01

#mobius #loki #lokius #mcuedit #lokiedit #marveledit #loki spoilers #owen wilson #tom hiddleston #dianagifs #owenwilsonedit #marvel #for the anon who asked about my fav parallel this is it!! #for now anyway... 👀 #forever a cautious optimist lol #the way loki finally isn't running they WANT to stay they WANT to come back to the only person who's ever grounded them... #in s1 mobius has already accepted he'll probably never see loki again that they'll be on to bigger better things #and mobius always wanted that for them so he makes himself move on then loki not only appears again physically fighting to be with him #but also making clear to everyone there's mutual respect and care and trust in being able to make things better including themselves #fun fact no one in their entire lives has ever put either of them first but each other so please enjoy thinking about that for eternity 🫠 #loki s2 spoilers

[spielzeugkaiser]

I love your art soooo much-it gives me life!! 🥰🥰🥰

I have a question about Milek and Jaskier! Milek says they fought before Jask went missing-what did they fight about? Did Milek say something he shouldn’t have? 👀😢 is there ANGST?

Also does Geralt know Mileks plush friend is called Roach? Because surely that’s a clue that Milek is his…(I love this universe so much)!!🥹❤️❤️❤️

[MASTERPOST] That was the last conversation they had before Milek stormed out - and when he came back, Jaskier was. gone. The thing is, Jaskier knows what Milek is interested in (and he is not even wrong about that, Milek has an interest in medicine, and helping people, and I think when they met he was Shanis biggest fan) and I think Jaskier is aware that some of the conflict does have its roots in Milek not wanting to leave him, even if they get really heated and ugly in their arguments. Milek shouldn't feel like he has to care for him, or have to protect him and at times I think Jaskier feels quite ashamed, which leads him to being way too unrelenting at times - especially if he thinks he's doing something to protect Milek.

#jaskier #the witcher #geraskier lovechild #artists on tumblr #omegaverse #I think if they argue Milek is saying stuff he shouldn't all the time #I think for Milek the part that makes him feel really bad is that he KNOWS that Jaskier would always choose having him again and again #because he KNOWS that he loves him more than anything else #but he still implied that he doesn't know - and he knows what he said was cruel #but he also !! is so angry #because Jaskier always treats him like he knows what's best for him and. let it be true - it still makes him FURIOUS #he isn't a little kid anymore #and he wants to HELP he loves his father and he knows that Jaskier gives and gives and gives especially when it comes to him #he doesn't need a fancy education in an academy where he'll be just the bastard kid again #he just needs a Pa who doesn't absolutely run himself to the ground #and I think he finally wants to meet Geralt too #also I'm trying to do a thing here which I think shows how secure their relationship truly is #because Geralt sees Milek as a quite sensible (if sometimes a bit hotheaded) young man - who is quite mature for his age #which he CAN be #but Geralt is also basically a stranger even if Milek knows he's his dad - and he tries to impress him naturally - ofc he wants to be liked #with Jaskier? who has his one true emotionally secure relationship with? #moody teenanger - but also allowing himself to be childish at times - crying shouting teasing - exploding sometimes #because he never ever had to question their relationship once #he can just let loose

[isthereintruthnobeauty1968]

pleasantly surprised by seeing this chairs scooched together leaning forward/leaning back situation in context when i wasn't looking for it

#p #tng #i'd seen caps of it while poking around in the tags from i think an instagram post one of the actors commented on? lol #have again not been actively looking for eps featuring them they're just often together anyway. besties! #(its in new ground. second alexander episode hence on the Worf Watchlist) #screencaps #geordi #data #daforge

[illithiddatingsim]

pls look at omeluum serving squunt. serving squussy

#i wish it was a clearer screenshot but i couldn’t get him to pose like that again so this is what i have #i mostly got a screenshot because i think it’s so funny when mindflayers stand with their bigass flappy feet on the ground like that #and then he posed for me. how polite #ahlafhqjhdajhd #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #omeluum #mind flayer #illithids

[disco-troy]

problems with beast world aside im loving the JLA/titans parallels to the Titans protecting Gar/Vic at all costs.

I think its a super interesting way to bring the titans in their first crisis, a callback to arguable their first crisis that involved the whole dc universe and to really dig into what it means to be the Titans.

#continuing to read i think its a lost oppurtunity that the hero community was all on board with protecting garro #i think it would be more interesting if u parelled the interpersonal conflicts witi=in the community with JLA/titans #I guess part of it was done in dark crisis but i don't think it was really concluded well #and theres the problem of who ur using like again id say black adam but its retreatind dark crisi ground #titans beast world #dc comics #teen titans #dick grayson #gar logan #vic

[madphantom]

Had a divine experience this week when a very pretty man who has previously said he'd probably lose a fight against me randomly picked me up like I weighed literally nothing

#personal post #i am not immune to occasionally being demonstrated how small i am by people who don't rub it in all the time #think i briefly saw god when my feet touched the ground again and he was like #huh I didn't think id manage to do that #sIR #im being very having a crush about normal things again dont mind me #ill probably reread this in a few weeks and cringe

[thepoisonroom]

'I flirted with the idea that instead of being trans that I was just a cross-dresser (a quirk, I thought, that could be quietly folded into an otherwise average life) and that my dysphoria was sexual in nature, and sexual only. And if my feelings were only sexual, then, I wondered, perhaps I wasn’t actually trans.

I had read about a book called The Man Who Would Be Queen, by a Northwestern University professor who believed that transwomen who were attracted to women were really confused fetishists, they wanted to be women to satisfy an autogynephilia. And though I first read about this book in the context of its debunkment and disparagement, I thought about the electricity of slipping on those tights, zipping up those boots, and a stream of guilt followed. Maybe this professor was right, and maybe I was only a fetishist. Not trans, just a misguided boy.

About a year later, on the Internet, I come across a transwoman who added a unique message to the crowd refuting this professor. Oh, I wish I remember who this woman was, and I wish even more that I could do better than paraphrase her, but I remember her saying something like this: “Well, of course I feel sexy putting on women’s clothing and having a woman’s body. If you feel comfortable in your body for the first time, won’t that probably mean it’ll be the first time you feel comfortable, too, with delighting in your body as a sexual thing?”'

-Casey Plett, Consciousness

#this quote always moves me almost to tears when i remember it #i'm not a trans woman and i don't share the author's specific experiences with transition #but it really moves me that she frame transition as joyfully giving yourself permission to approach your body #not as something that has to be disciplined and deprived and made small in all these various ways #but as a means for experiencing pleasure and joy and delight and for insisting that our feelings and desires are worth #valuing and exploring and treasuring #i always used to think of prioritizing those things for myself as selfish and irresponsible #but who does it harm to want to experience pleasure in your own body? #it's such a beautifully simple and powerful switch to have flip in your head #and equally why are we forced to deny our own pleasure in transition and anything else related to our bodies in the name of moral rectitude #this is why i get so confused and pissed off when other trans people are fatphobic for example #like why are you so invested in politics of shame and disgust that never had any purpose other than #violently disciplining people as if they've violated moral codes by existing in a body #to say nothing of white people being racist in gay and trans communities #like again this system of violence is foundational to homophobia and transphobia #so why are you acting like it has nothing to do with you #even if you are unmoved by the urgency of other people's suffering which btw you should be moved by #what do you hope to gain by acting a collaborator and handmaiden to those systems #Casey Plett #she really is one of my favorite authors i wish more non-canadians read her #this quote is from a series of columns she did ont transition and every single one is a banger #i love when she talks about the people-pleasing elements of dysphoria and transition denial #she's so sharp about noting how many of us deny our own dysphoria on the grounds that others like and validate our bodies #that's how i always felt during my cis conventionally feminine era #it pleased other people so much and also that reception felt so hollow and joyless to me because i hated it #i get less of that positive feedback but that feels so unimportant next to the joy and pleasure i get to experience #said with the understanding that i'm very privileged in being able to prioritize those things without fear. but it was a switch flip #personal nonsense

[ickypuppi3]

thinking about steve getting kinda, sorta. jealous. that billy’s been with other guys while he, himself, has no experience in that area.

maybe it’s as they’re hanging out in steve’s room, a couple months or so into them fooling around and. they’re just lying there, on the bed. steve staring at that mark on his ceiling from when he threw a baseball in fourth grade only for it to come right back down and give tommy h a black eye and billy, well.

billy’s just talking. telling steve all about his- past endeavours. about those guys under the boardwalk and his friend who kissed him and stuck a hand down his pants when they broke into some dilapidated house to smoke shitty weed and that other guy who really knew what to do with his fingers if you know what i mean, stevie and.

steve can’t stand it anymore ‘cause. it sucks to think someone’s made billy feel better then he has, than he knows how to, so. he just-

“show me.”

it’s too sudden. too loud. even over the mixtape billy gave steve a week ago with the excuse that steve needs better taste.

and billy just sits there, eyes bugging out as a tinny guitar riff bleeds into the quiet of the room ‘cause. “what?”

and steve flushes a little. shrugs. “show me. teach me or whatever.”

“how to-”

“how to make you-” steve pushes his hair back. tries to make his voice sound a little less desperate. “i wanna make you feel good.”

and billy’s feeling kinda awkward himself so. he grins at steve. leers. drags his eyes up ‘n down. “man. i gotta put more effort in here. i mean, if you didn’t already know i was feeling g-”

but steve’s not having it.

“i wanna make you feel good. better than-” a pause. “those other guys.”

“you-” billy’s eyebrows shoot up. expression somewhere between incredulous and cat-who-got-the-cream. “you’re jealous.”

“jealous. ha.”

“you are.”

“i’m competitive.” steve levels him with a stare. nods once like that’s gonna make his point stick.

“uh huh.”

“it’s totally different.”

“right.” billy grins, unable to help himself. “so.”

“so.”

steve sits up. on his knees. leans forward, one hand on the bed beside billy’s waist and the other inching its way up beneath the hem of those shorts steve has a love hate relationship with.

“teach me.”

and it’s billy’s turn to flush. freckles fading beneath pink as steve’s index finger rubs circles just south of his hip. let’s out a stuttering breath that ends in yea’okay as he reaches up to pull off his tank. teeth making little indents in his bottom lip as steve stares.

and steve’s a good student, right? well. maybe not in class but. with billy laid out all pretty under him, touching. talking, well. steve’s pretty sure he could get himself an A+ on listening and attentiveness alone.

#the voices the Voices #soo incredibly normal right now what the hell #doctor prescribed me with a seaside break and 100mg of harringrove 5 times a day. or something #jealous steve everyone clap for jealous steve #i think about them for a few seconds and my teeth are ground down to a fine dust #but like in a normal way you know #my words #yippee ! the tag i used it again man its been a time #harringrove #billy hargrove

[cobbssecondbelt]

The differences between Din and Paz's relation with their foundling are quite interesting to observe.

Paz explicitly refers to Ragnar as his son, and Ragnar calls him ''dad'' without hesitation. We don't know how long they have been together, but they are family, there's no doubt about it for anyone.

Meanwhile, Din has had Grogu under his wing for 3 years, and despite their obvious bond and everybody else saying otherwise, he still refuses to acknowledge himself a parental figure. Even without the threat of having to hand Grogu away, Din can't quite yet let himself embrace the role of a father fully. Probably because he knows the pain of losing parents and knows Grogu will eventually lose him before he's even out of childhood, and therefore can't bring himself to this level of emotional vulnerability (even though his love for his foundling is evident), as other people have already mentioned.

Paz and Ragnar don't have that. Obviously nobody is safe from an early death, especially not Mandalorian warriors, but for them it is a risk, not a certainty. Din knows Grogu will outlive him by centuries. He knows he will only be a blip in his lifetime. And maybe he wants to protect Grogu from the great pain that inevitably comes with great love. Even if it's too late for that.

Din still has a long way to go and a lot of things to learn about loving. And think Paz can teach him plenty, without even realizing it.

#Fatherhood and attachement are definitely not themes I expected to see explored between these two characters but I sure am not complaining #Paz and his foundling literally melted my heart today and I think it can be a great way for him and Din to find a common ground again #I also strongly believe Paz never truly acted out of evil intentions towards Din #He acts in extremes but actually always has fair points #or acts according to tradition #din djarin #grogu djarin #paz vizsla #ragnar vizsla #the mandalorian

[theladyragnell]

I am once again asking for romance novel recs!

Specifically, I am really burned out on the current trends in contemporary romcoms, and I'm looking for some good historicals or fantasy/sci fi romances. Bonus points for available in mass market paperback, but I know that's a hard ask these days!

My favorite romances so far this year have been:

You Made a Fool of Death with Your Beauty by Akwaeke Emezi

The Earl and the Executive by Kai Butler

At His Countess's Pleasure by Olivia Waite

I am specifically burned out on enemies to lovers where they just dislike each other instead of having external circumstances keeping them apart, second chance romance where half the book is spent on flashbacks to the first romance, and heroines who are the center of a Clumsiness And Disaster Vortex.

I love romps (and if you like romps try The Earl and the Executive above), don't mind an action romance (I quite liked Something Wilder by Christina Lauren), and am fond of a good old-fashioned soppy drama (Christina Britton has hit the spot for me there a few times lately). I'm just specifically not looking for the books that tend to come with really samey illustrated covers, I suspect if you've read this far you know the ones I mean.

(I am generally familiar with the catalogs of the following authors: Mary Balogh, Courtney Milan, Olivia Waite, Olivia Atwater, T. Kingfisher, KJ Charles, Cat Sebastian, Eva Ibbotson, and lots of the traditionally published authors with big backlists (Lisa Kleypas, Beverly Jenkins, Julia Quinn, and so on). Generally I do read a lot of romance, but I'm hoping my dash will have some deeper cuts!)

#about me #i think i'm just overdosed on insincerity again #i love quips and romps they just don't feel super grounded in a lot of things i watch and read lately