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eliciana · 1 month

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Reverse SAGAU: The Weird Door At My Café

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Tw: Reverse!Isekai!Sagau, Normal Au, Café Au, a bit of cussing like this bit 🤏.

Reader: Gn!Reader, Adult!Reader, Café Owner!Reader

Characters: Reader, Paimon, Traveler

Note: Restaurant to Another World animanga inspired au. You can slide into my dms if you ever want to be tagged in my works just tell me what series you want to be tagged in or all of them. thank you <3. Also, I may say that the characters other than the reader may be a bit OOC cause it's been a long time since I played genshin and I'm just finishing all of my works with my knowledge left from playing the game. So sorry about it 🙏🙏.

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You stood, motionless, your eyes fixed in disbelief upon the distant scene before you. As the wind cut through the air, a shiver ran down your spine, leaving goosebumps in its wake. The purity of the air surrounded you, carrying with it an intoxicating scent that smelled pure. The warm touch of the sun's rays caressing your skin affirmed that this experience couldn't possibly be a figment of your imagination. A fleeting thought of doubt crept in, but you quickly dismissed it; after all, you had never dabbled in any kind of drugs. This moment, as unbelievable as it seems, had to be undeniably real.

With careful fingers, you gently retrieved your fallen shoe/heel/slipper from the bed of plush, emerald-green grass. As you slipped it back onto your foot, your eyes instinctively wandered upward, transfixed by the expansive stretch of blue sky above you. It was quite unlike the very bright pixelated one you see on your screen. Everything that you see within the door was real and not a nightmare.

____________________________________

After composing yourself, you went inside your cafe, close the door, drag a chair nearest to the door, took a seat on the chair you placed infront of the door, and contemplated life. A deep heavy sigh got out your mouth as you continue looking the the strange thing infront of you. "What now? What do I do? Should I just lock it?" you asked yourself and looked at the door. Welp, well, there goes your master plan. Suprise suprise there's no keyhole and having a key would not make any difference. "Ugh."

You sat up and opened the door again, only to be baffled to see a different scenery other than the distant City of Mondstadt. The door was now currently in the Liyue Harbor. You closed the door and opened it again, you were now in Inazuma. Close, open, and now in Sumeru. Once again, you are now in Fontaine.

"Yeah bye." you closed the door again and returned the chair from where it once was. Contemplating what you should do next, your feet carried you around the whole café. You went to the counter and decided to make yourself something to help with calming yourself first in order to think clearly. It was a good thing that you had brought all of the materials and ingredients you needed in the café because you had thought of opening the café tomorrow. But with how things are now, you don't know what to do.

Teyvat is filled with many dangerous beings such as hilichurls, slimes, etc. You are but a normal human being with no experience in fighting and fighting your baby cousins was not enough of an experience to be able to fight toe to toe with monsters you have only seen through a screen. Yes, a gun would probably best to use but you don't have a permit for that and you don't want to be in jail when you have just barely open your dream café. But nobody had to know, right? What if-

A deep sigh fell from your lips once again. The stress is really getting in to you, huh? The bitter/sweet aroma of (coffee/tea/juice) filled your sense of smell. You were making your favorite, (your choice of coffee/tea/juice). After some time of finishing your drink, you took it along with a (pastry of your choice) that you had in your car, in which you had thought of eating to celebrate the opening, and sat in a chair facing the door. Taking your time in eating/drinking, many thoughts come and go in your head to solve the predicament you are in now. You had even thought of postponing the opening of the café until you had thought of a way on what to do with the door.

Of course you read the fanfics circulating all around the genshin fandom and one of the those that you have read was SAGAU where you might be the imposter or the creator of teyvat or you become a villain or anything in between. The most common of them was being an imposter. What if you were to become the said imposter if one day a person will open the door to your café? What if they kill you? What if-

*creak......*

Your rambling came to a stop as you looked at the door horrified. Oh no no no no no no NO NO NO! YOU JINXED YOURSELF DIDN'T YOU?! THIS DAMNED FATE-

'Oh dear God, Buddha, Allah, Deities, whoever higher being there is, pls help me...' you thought as you clasp your hands, praying to higher beings. Before you could even feel it, tears cascaded down you face to the table. "I'm nOt ReAdy tO dIE yeT... Ughhhhhhhh" you sobbed into your hands loudly like a child lost in a mall.

"Hello?" a person peaked from behind the door.

Fuck.

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The Traveler, along with Paimon, was doing their daily quests until they saw something shining in the far distance. Their curiousity made them want to investigate it.

"Hm. Why is a door in the middle of the forest with no support or whatsoever?" Paimon mumbled as the door came into their view. The Traveler also had the same thought.

"Is it perhaps a magic door of some kind? I think w-"

*creak*

The Traveler stopped speaking as the door opened but from where they are right now, they couldn't see who opened the door and couldn't get to ask since the door closed with a loud bang when they were going to get closer.

"Well... that was something..." Paimon looked at the Traveler. "Traveler? What's wrong? BREATHE! YOU'RE GOING TO DIE AT THIS RATE!" Paimon brought tons of fried egg out of the Traveler's bag and smacked it into the Traveler's mouth and forced them to chew the egg.

After confirming the Traveler is back into top condition, Paimon asked them what the hell happened to them.

"I-I don't know. I suddenly felt something when whoever opened that door and the air around me became heavy that it became hard to breathe..." The Traveler shooked their head gently and sighed. "I also felt something strange. The energy of whoever is beyond that door, excluded an aura that is very familiar to me, but I don't know who or what it is."

"Hm. Paimon thinks that we should open that door and see whoever that and see if they truly are familiar to you or maybe perhaps this connection that you feel is related to your sibling!" Paimon twirled around the air, exaggerating her words with her actions.

For once, Traveler thought it was a good idea at first but there is also a flaw in that idea. A flaw that might cause their life if whoever is beyond that door is hostile and will kill them. It is better to be cautious then to be 6ft underground before finding their sibling.

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Taglist:

@udretlnea

#genshin impact #genshin impact traveler #sagau #genshin sagau #genshin impact sagau #sagau genshin #self aware genshin #genshin reverse sagau #genshin reverse isekai #cafe owner! reader au #gender neutral reader #gn!reader #sagau x reader #genshin x reader #•works[🍡]•#genshin series

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sickuma · 10 months

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ORPHIC (2) — A Simon Riley fic.

❱ This is the last part of HIRAETH ! I don't want to drag it any longer than this. It's so much fun writing this and exploring more words to add to my vocab! Everyone's been nice (except when they give me their therapy bills) I love you guys srsly, You make writing so much more fun <3

I should have gotten this done HOURS ago, but I had to do stuff and just finished working out T-T but hey, writing block isn't killing me rn.

ꜝ？This fic may contain heavy topics such as death, depression and melt-downs, if any of those are not to your liking. Please do so exit the fic. Angst warning!

➴ SYNOPSIS — Ghost mourns of what's lost; reminiscing of the memories, apologizing, begging for you to hear his desperation for your presence as he sat Infront of your tombstone.

QUERENCIA — (n.) A place from which a one's strength is drawn, where one feels at home; the place where you are your most authentic self.

“Relationships in the military,”

He spoke, pausing to stare at your eyes. Searching for hesitance,

“They tend to be tragic.”

“But we’ll be together, no?”

“look , kid, it's not as easy as it sounds—”

“Do you feel the same way?”

You cut him off, not giving him the chance to speak. Catching ‘the’ simon ghost riley off guard, “Yes.” he breathes out.

“Then I don't see the problem, lieutenant, I love you, you love me. That's what barney said.”

He stares at the void, remembering yet again another memory he kept special in his heart. He wondered if you had not pursued him at that exact moment. Would he still feel the raw pain that plagued his heart now? Would it still hurt all the same?

If you hadn't stubbornly shown him how determined and real your love for him was, would he still be in this position, dreading every day that comes knowing the person he needs the most was taken from him.

throwing his gear onto the side. Making his way back to his quarters without giving anyone a second glance,

Ever since you've been gone, the base has been awfully tense. The rest understood his situation, trying their best to be there for him, all while attending to their own duties. The past few weeks had been the hardest, They could tell Ghost had been on edge.

He’d only speak to them if it's necessary, otherwise he’d be kept to himself. As if the past had repeated itself, there appeared a gap between his friends and him. He was mourning, and he plans to keep mourning,

If that means having you on his mind,

Then he’ll mourn forever.

“Ghost?”

Price’s eyes widened at the sight of Ghost,

It’s the first month since you've passed away and the rest of the team planned to pay you a visit to show respect and also let you know how missed you are, not just by them, but also by Ghost who seemed to have shut his whole world out.

He saw how Ghost shown a tough facade when he would hear him call for her,

At night, when everyone slept, Ghost cried and wept for you to come back. Begging aimlessly for your return,

Begging endlessly to feel your arms around him again.

Price didn't expect him to be joining them. He hadn't been. The team visited your resting place a couple of times before, he’d invite him but he’ll make up reasons not to go. Price figured he still hasn't accepted that's where your body lays,

The ride to their destination felt almost eerie, the tension leading the hour long drive. Nobody dared to speak, not a single word.

Ghost’s mind resides elsewhere, watching the scenery they drove past. Chest heaving up and down as he struggles to fathom that he’d finally visit you,

No—he was more occupied with thinking about how it’s only been a month.

It felt longer than that. It felt longer than his training days. He felt more exhausted, more agitated, and more angry. He resents every breathing thing he comes across to,

He knew it sounded cruel, but why do they deserve to live and you don't? You have been the kindest, and yet you were taken first. He couldn't understand,

As a soldier he’d lost multiple comrades, having to face funerals—visit the cemetery, and deal with death itself. Though yours felt unreal,

It felt as if his bones were crushed. He knew how pathetic it seemed, clinging onto someone who's never coming back, but he'd rather cling onto the past if it means having to hold you close to his heart forever, where you belonged.

、

Everyone got out of the car,

Everyone but him.

Price sighed, not planning to pry. If his breath felt shallow just by being here, he could only imagine what Ghost felt at this moment, considering it was his first time to ever be here.

A few minutes passed, and the three sat quietly at first until soap had cracked a dad joke, lifting the atmosphere just a little bit. They spoke as if you were there, sitting with them, price would constantly glace at Ghost, who sat quietly in the car. He wondered what ran through his mind.

“We should give him his own time to talk to [name].” Price groaned as he stretched when he stood up, the two following closely behind him. “He needs this.”

Ghosts' eyes caught them approaching. He felt his stomach sink. He knew he planned to wait until they finished before he took his turn as he expected himself to break down and shed tears. He didn't want them to see that. And yet he still felt his heart beat faster when they came back,

Price threw him a small smile, a smile of empathy.

As if that's his cue, he jumped out of the car. Taking slow strides towards ‘your’ direction. He never thought he could ever despise a cemetery so much in his life,

The only thing he could think of was the way you laid down there, away from his grasp.

No matter how slow he walks, he soon finds himself in front of ‘you’, oh well—a stone that only proved to him that you're gone. “Have you been waiting?”

He couldn't believe it,

He was talking to a mere stone.

But he’ll take what he can get.

“Wake up.” he stared down with an expressionless face, “enough laziness, [name]. Get up from there.”

“You can have all of the shirts you want from me, you can pluck my eyebrows, do it, you can get a puppy. Anything you want just— just wake up.”

His voice betrayed him the more he spoke,

The longer he looked at the stone, the way he kept reading the credentials written on it, the more it felt real. Every passing second is just another evidence of your disappearance,

“You always call me mean,”

He swallowed,

“Yet you're the one who left first.” his cold gaze softened, the more he looked at the ground. Under the ground where your body laid.

Where the body of his lover slept eternally.

“How do I find you now? Now that I'm stuck here?”

He recollects his promise, the promise to reunite in your next life. It all pierced through him. He’s a soldier, yet he finds himself worrying about the most ridiculous thing. What if you'd reincarnate before he passed?

What if you leave him behind again,

What if this time you find someone else to love?

What will he be then?

“Remember when you'd go on tangents about how fascinating reincarnation and universes are? I believe you now, okay? So— so wait for me.”

He sat down, quietly enjoying the breeze. He couldn't deny the pain of the piercing ache that developed in his chest. It never really went away. He would simply distract himself.

“I find it hard to sleep again, love.”

“The bed feels colder without you in it. Do i sound cheesy? Do not make fun of me. I want to be honest. Maybe doing that would lessen the overbearing hurt in my chest. It’s just—it’s only been a month since youre gone and im already a fucking mess. I mean, look at me,”

He chuckled,

“I look rough, dont i?” he sighed, “would you still find my eyes pretty even when i tire them out by crying?”

He looked away, observing the serenity of the cemetery. He wondered how many souls wandered around, and if yours were one, and if you stood close to him.

“I feel—just terrible. When I woke up, I thought I'd finally lose it, well I did. I caused price trouble, you'd have scolded me. I really did it this time, pushing everyone away as if you'd come back to tell me off. That's not ever happening, and that's what hurts the most.”

He spoke slowly, yet he felt out of breath.

“It feels suffocating—you know? To live without you.”

“I don't know why I woke up, I wished I didn't. Maybe then I'd be with you.”

“It’s scary, [name], so scary.” he whispered, the rasp of his voice sounding more evident. “I have no certainty if we’ll see each other again; and I need nothing more than to hold—to feel you again. To hear your voice, to take in your scent. If I have to give everything up for that, I will.”

“Anything just to have you back to me.”

He stared at the words engraved on the tomb,

“but if i have to wait decades or centuries—i will—without hesitance, without a blink, i will. For you, I'll keep being patient.”

“That's how worthy you are [name]. So wait for me please, no matter how long it takes for me to find you again, please wait.”

He spoke lowly, but certainly, no matter where you are, he hoped you'd recognize him, hoping you’d recognize his eyes you loved so much,

“Even if it means i'll have to die again and again, i’ll keep searching for you until we’re back home until i can hear your voice call my name again.”

“Wait for me, [name].”

Hoping you’d recognize your Simon.

、

Somewhere along the memories,

、

Somewhere along the universe,

、

Somewhere along life and death,

、

Somewhere along—

、

“Simon.”

“Pardon?” he looked at you, puzzled expression written all over his face. “Whatd you just say?”

“My simon.”

We're home.

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amoristt · 9 months

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a/n: yaaay back with part 2 hehehe. im glad you guys r enjoying it so far! i have big plans for this series

- as always comments/reblogs are appreciated! - want to support me? heres my kofi!

The Accused | Simon "Ghost" Riley/Reader, Pt 2

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The hours that followed Ghost leaving you to your own were brutal. It took a few long moments to collect yourself, all tears and trembling hands, but eventually, your legs found the strength to haul your body up to your feet. Your mind replays the last couple minutes on loop tauntingly.

If Ghost hadn't caught you in time, you'd be nothing but a broken egg on the pavement below. Your brain tried to think about what it would have felt like if you had plummeted without haste, but your body reminded you angrily how it felt to hit the wall on your way down. Surely, deep bruises of purple and blue would climb like vines up the side of your frame. Your body would make sure to ache, to remind you of the damage you'd inflicted onto it.

Damaged, but alive.

It feels odd being alive, now. You really had made your choice, fully accepted the gravity of your life cut short. Perhaps it was cowardly. But, ultimately, you knew that it would have been the better outcome between death and eternal imprisonment.

Still, guilt eats away at you. The image of Ghost's eyes through his mask haunts you- that primal fear in those beautiful eyes engraved in the back of your brain. If he hadn't been as fast- if he'd hesitated for even a second, you'd have slipped right through his fingers. You'd have dropped all the way down to the unforgiving concrete and ceased to be right in front of him. It hurts you- the thought of him grieving you like that. Surely he would have hated you for it.

When night came (rather quickly), you took your chance to escape. Wherever point 'A' was, it wasn't so nearby you couldn't scurry down those five flights of stairs and dart into the darkness. You ran from bush to bush, building to building, and even through a knee-deep marsh. You were grateful that this October was warm, but you would be lying to say you appreciated the bugs. Mosquitos ate away at your skin despite your efforts to battle them away.

You'd only been a few miles away from base, so it wasn't long before you were skirting along the trees, staring at the mile-high electric fences surrounding the fort you'd become so familiar with. The base you and Ghost had been staying at was a nice one- with all the fixings and even single-person 'homes'. They were small, one-bedroom trailer-looking flats with all the basic necessities, but compared to the places you'd slept before they may have well as been your own little personal heaven. Warm water and an AC unit-they'd spoiled you and your fellow soldiers. You remember on your first night, cuddled up under the blankets on your very own bed, praying they'd keep you stationed here for the rest of your military days.

But, now, here you were, creeping along the greenery, feeling more foe than friend. From outside, you could see military vehicles parking for the night and soldiers standing guard. Sneaking up on your own base, your own friends, you really did feel like a spy. You linger outside, wondering what to do.

Then it hits you.

And you know exactly where to go.

You disappear back into the trees. It's barely another mile out, but with just the moon overheard to guide you, you struggle to find your way. You pass by trees and boulders of every size, before you enter a small clearing, and tucked all the way to the side is exactly what you were looking for. A dingy half-finished shed engulfed by the canopy of trees and shadows.

And god, there he is, standing there and waiting for you.

In this light, Ghost really does look like he could be a monster. His mask nearly glows. Half covered by murky shadows, dotted by the glowing streaks of the moon passing through the leaves overhead, he stands and waits for you. Like he knew you were coming.

And he was right. Because here you were.

You snap a twig on accident and his body visibly tenses as he searches for the source, but when his eyes find your figure in the darkness it only takes a second for him to realize it's you.

"Been a while since I've been here," you start. He moves to the side as you pass him. The door opens with a dull creak.

"I'm glad we both had the same idea." Ghost grunts.

"You're telling me. I had to ditch my phone and everything, so if you weren't here I'd have no way of contacting you. And y'know what, that's two phones in two months. Talk about bad luck." You sigh.

"Never did find you're old one, hm? Not good, soldier."

"Oh, I'm sure it's lost in the ocean or blown to bits by now."

Ghost scoffs. "Hope so. Get inside."

When you'd first been stationed at his base, boredom often ate away at you until it felt like you'd go crazy. Ghost had been off on his own mission, the few friends you did have at that time never left the base of their own volition. But you, on the other hand, craved exploration. So you found yourself wandering the perimeter around the base, thinking about nothing and everything. That's when you discovered the beat-up old shed. At that time it was nothing more than a caved-in roof, rain-soaked flooring, and a broken window. Over the course of a couple weeks, you began to work to fix it up, glad to have something to focus on during your between-missions time.

When Ghost had returned to base during Christmas, and he realized that you too had no home to return to for the holidays, he began to join you.

Over that Christmas, you both turned it into somewhere you could both go to talk and occasionally share a few drinks. That was when you'd truly bonded with him. That was when he'd finally started letting you in willingly.

Dirt flecks off the frame of the door as you step inside, and it's just as dusty as you remember. Two chairs sit in the center with patchy blankets serving as cushions. An uneven table sits between them, one leg broken half off but supported by water-logged books stacked atop each other.

The moon filters in through the cracked window and paints the brown walls a beautiful blue.

Ghost sits with a grunt, kicking his feet out and sighing. It invites you, calls you in to shut the door behind you and settle beside him. So, you do. The chair creaks underneath your weight and you breathe out the frustrations of the day, gone into the air. For the first time that day, your guard lowers.

You just... breathe.

"What a nightmare this is." You sigh.

Ghost shrugs. "No one knows what 't think. They know something's not right."

A pang of relief visibly flushes through you, cut short when he shakes his head.

"Don't get too excited." He says quietly.

"...And why's that?"

"Graves called in his shadows." Ghost taps his finger against the table, lingering, picking and choosing his next words while you feel anxiety start to bubble within you. When he speaks again, it's forlorn. "He isn't exactly pushing for 'em to bring you in alive."

The weight of your heart dropping could have burst straight through the chair you sat on. It settles into your gut like an awful stone. A dull, pained chuckle escapes you.

"I knew he didn't like me, but damn."

Ghost shakes his head. "He's panicking. Thinks you can tell us where the missiles are."

"Missiles?" You ask, eyebrows raised in concern.

It must have struck him then, that Ghost hadn't yet updated you on the situation arising off-air. And judging by the way he tenses and leans forward in his chair, it must be pretty grim.

"Hassan... He's got our missiles. Three of 'em." As Ghost speaks with newfound hesitation and urgency, you can feel your nerves lighting up with each syllable. "We can't find the damn things. They get out... 'Lot of people will die."

"Jesus Christ." You wipe your palms down your face, eyebrows knit together. "How the hell did he get our missiles?"

"That's what we're trying to figure out. 'Pparently there's some messages and photos of you chatting with one of Hassan's men. That you might know a thing or two on where to find 'em."

"I haven't talked to anyone that wasn't our own." You groan. "God, what the fuck. And pictures?"

"From what I heard. They haven't shown 'em to us. Refuse to, actually." Ghost leans back in his chair, eyeing you like he's holding something back. "Like I said, no one knows what to think."

You stare down at your lap. Though you already know the answer, you find yourself asking anyways, with an uneven voice.

"...You trust me, right...?"

"God's sake." He scoffs, and you regret asking at all.

"I just have to be sure. Pictures can be convincing-"

"Pictures none of us have even laid eyes on. You think I'd be here right now if I didn't believe you?"

Guilt eats away at you, eyes downcast. "I know. I'm sorry. I just... I can't wrap my head around why of all people it had to be me."

"We'll find out. Shepherd won't give us hardly any information, and anything he does give us is... vague." Ghost is choosy with his words. "...Shepherd found and turned the evidence in himself, supposedly."

You feel an actual strike of nausea pulse through you.

"There's no way Shepherd would frame me." Though you try to say it with an even tone, your voice exposes your lack of confidence in your General. You suck in a breath when there's no reply. "Ghost..?"

Ghost doesn't answer, but his eyes do flick to yours. A silent, cautious confirmation.

You swallow. Hard.

"But... But what good could come of this? I mean up until now I've been an exemplary soldier. Like, not to brag here, but I graduated at the fucking top of my squad and I damn well aced every test they threw at me."

"I know all this." Ghost chimes. "Everyone knows all of this. I don't know what the big plan is. I don't even know if there is a big plan. I just know something isn't right."

There's a pause, and his eyes soften.

"I know you wouldn't do this."

Tears well at the waterlines of your eyes and you struggle to hold them back. With the military against you, Shadow's snapping at your heels at every chance they could get, and now faced with the chance that your own fucking general would frame you, you're completely unsure of what to do next. Ghost leans over the table and sets a firm hand on your shoulder.

You bite your tears back, refusing to let him witness you cry again. Twice in one day was just too much on your already shattered ego.

"What do I do?" Your voice betrays you, uneven and breaking.

Ghost stands up and sighs. "You aren't doing anything. You're staying here."

"For real?" You frown up at him, pawing at your eyes angrily. The sight of him preparing to leave makes your stomach churn- the thought of being alone in this shed all night slinking into your mind. "I can't just sit here and do nothing-"

"That's exactly what you're gonna do. Get some rest, tonight." Ghost doesn't even give you the chance to argue, already pulling the door open. You gape at him from your chair with wet eyes. You see the way he lingers, see the way he considers stepping back inside, but his resolve remains firm. For just a brief moment, he turns to look at you from outside.

You sit on the chair, bringing your knees up to your chest. Sounds from all directions reach your waiting ears as you take a final glance at him.

"I'll be back in the morning." He offers. The door shuts, and darkness encases you.

Shrouded in pitch black, listening to the sound of his footsteps growing further and further away, you fear tears sting your eyes once more. All alone, you let them slip down your cheeks.

You'd never felt so alone.

#mw2 #cod mw2 #ghost #simon riley #simon ghost riley #ghost x reader #simon riley x reader

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eddiemunsons80sbaby · 6 months

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Everybody Hurts

Chapter 10

Pairing: EddieMunsonxReader

Summary: You needed to escape, escape from your life, your messy divorce, and all the pitying looks. Looks you couldn't ignore when everyone in town had known you and Cam, had known your shame and failure. So, you took the first job you could get, teaching third grade in a town called Hawkins. Little did you know, you were walking right into another messy situation, a messy situation with big brown eyes and long dark waves. But he's resistant, at times unbearable and you start getting curious about the town's past, his past, especially when things don't start adding up.

18+ Only for eventual smut

Next chapter: 11/01

Word Count: 6.5K

Masterlist

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

“Got any big plans this weekend?” queried Leslie as the two of you headed out of the school on Friday afternoon.

You had stayed behind for about a half an hour to finish up your lesson plans, really not wanting to have to do them over the weekend again. The whole Lance and Charlie situation had eaten up most of your planning time the whole week and you were not looking forward to that meeting on Monday. You’d spoken with Principal Washington that morning and he was going to sit in to ensure the meeting stayed civil. That at least gave you just a bit of comfort.

“No. No big plans,” you answered, holding open the door for Leslie, stepping out into the warm sunshine. You may have let your kids have an extra ten minutes of recess today because it was just too beautiful not to and you needed that extra ten minutes. This was the time of year when you relished every ounce of perfect weather, your body breathing a sigh of relief that dark, gloomy days of winter were behind you for now. “I am thinking of grabbing Chinese tonight and maybe renting a couple of movies. If the weather stays like this, I’ll probably work in my garden some more. Maybe I’ll even get to the hardware store and start the work to give my front porch a fresh coat of paint.”

The thought cheered you and you needed something to cheer you up after the debacle that roller skating had become. By the time you came back off the rink, Eddie was gone. Dustin told you he said he’d had enough of skating and taken off. You had allowed yourself to feel guilty for only a brief moment before you remembered it wasn’t your fault.

If he was insistent on being so miserable all the time then that was on him. You had allowed him to occupy too much of your brain space for too long. You were done worrying about what he thought of you, done trying to get him to be your friend, hell to just be okay with you existing in the same space as him. You didn’t have to get along with Eddie Munson to spend time with the rest of the group. You would just avoid each other. He didn’t have to speak to you. You would have plenty of other people to converse with, far more enjoyable people.

“Really? You’re planning to work on your weekend off? Girl, I have no plans other than relaxing. This week has been hell.”

“That it has,” you grumbled. “But when else am I going to get anything done around my house? Besides, keeping busy keeps my mind off things. It’s therapeutic for me to work with my hands.”

“Well, you know what they say. Idle hands are the devil’s playground. Oh my god. Speaking of the devil…holy shit, what is Eddie Munson doing here?”

Leslie’s words took a minute to register in your brain. Eddie? This could not be happening. Not just as you were convincing yourself to stop obsessing over the man. The last thing you needed was him showing up and sending you straight down the rabbit hole again. You’d promised yourself that you were going to stay away from him, to keep as much distance between you as you could. That was going to be hard to do if he kept showing up at your work. You’d taken enough of his shit and you were done with it.

You glanced over to find him just as he’d been the other day, leaning back against the side of his van, a cigarette dangling between his fingers, looking like he belonged there. Looking like he hadn’t been an absolute dick to you last night. Like this was just a normal occurrence, him showing up at your work, waiting for you to come out. Absolutely not. You were not going to do this again.

“I’ll see you Monday,” you blurted to Leslie, quickly hurrying over to the bike rack, your shoes tapping across the pavement, trying to get out of there before he had a chance to notice you. If you could just get on your bike, pedal out of the parking lot, maybe he would think he’d missed you and just leave.

“Uh…okay, see you Monday,” Leslie replied in confusion, narrowing her eyes toward Eddie’s form as she made her way to her car, her steps clicking just a little quicker as if she were frightened.

The sight of your coworker rushing away like Eddie was the bogeyman caused your hackles to rise before you reminded yourself that you weren't caring about him anymore. It wasn’t your battle to fight. It wasn’t your business what anyone in this town thought of him. He’d made it very clear what he thought of you.

You pulled your bike out and were just hopping on when a hand caught your arm. Your eyes shot up even though you already knew who it was, the knowledge sending your body into panic mode as your shoulders and chest tightened. Your heartbeat pounded in your ears. You fought to control your breathing and maintain calm but the very presence of him was like a tsunami of stress and tension, your entire body reacting to him.

“Hey, what are you doing? Didn’t you see me standing over there?” Eddie inquired, his look one of curiosity and confusion.

“Yeah, I did,” you snapped simply, grabbing onto your handlebars, placing one foot on the pedal, ready to take off. How could he look at you like nothing happened? How could he stand here like he was surprised that you were trying to get away, that you were ignoring him? Why was he even here? Was he really that dense or did he just not see anything wrong with his actions?

“Whoa, hey.” A forced laugh rose from his chest, fake and grating, letting you know that he was not that dense. He knew exactly why you didn’t want to talk to him, his eyes wide and anxious. “You’re not just gonna take off, are you?”

Your teeth gritted with tension, your hands gripping the handlebars painfully, feeling as if you were a rubber band that had been pulled so tight it was about to snap. He’d stretched you to your limit and your control was fraying. You were going to lose your shit all over him in this parking lot if he didn’t walk away.

“Why in the hell are you here?” you managed, inhaling through your nose, your eyes focused ahead of you, scared that if you looked at him you would start screaming. As teachers came strolling out of the building, eager for two days of freedom, you couldn’t do that. You couldn’t have all of your co-workers thinking you were some kind of lunatic. That gossip would spread through the school like wildfire. Hell, it would probably spread through the town before the weekend was out. The new teacher in Hawkins was completely certifiable. Nobody would want you to teach their children after that.

“I thought we could go to the junkyard to look at parts for the car,” he explained, as if it should be the most obvious thing in the world, and it only infuriated you more how casual he could be after being so vicious last night. “Remember? I called you on Wednesday and told you about it.”

This seemed to be the routine the two of you were setting up. He’d be a total asshole and then he’d show up and want to talk to you like nothing had happened, like you were friends. Just brush it all under the rug and move along until it inevitably happened again. Because it would. Of that you had no doubt. It was only a matter of time before he decided something about you pissed him off. It was an incessant merry-go-round of moodiness where you always wound up in the same place and you were done with it. You were beyond ready to get off this ride.

“You have got to be shitting me,” you growled harshly. “Just…no. No.”

“What do you mean no?” he scoffed with a snort, his head tossing back, sending those dark waves swaying.

“I mean no, Eddie. N-O. It’s a fairly simple word, only two letters. Did you somehow miss all that shit I said to you last night?” you demanded.

“What? You mean after I fell? That was just…it was nothing. Look, we were both just annoyed and we got grouchy. It wasn’t that big of a deal. I forgive you, okay?”

“You forgive me? You forgive me!” you screamed, not even caring who heard you anymore. “You have got to be kidding me. You’re the asshole and you’re forgiving me? It is a big deal! It’s a big fucking deal, okay? You are absolutely the most annoying human being I have ever met and that is saying something because I was married to an absolute jerk. I’m done! I’m beyond done with your bullshit.”

Eddie’s arms folded over his chest, his stance widening as if he were preparing to challenge you. His tongue ran along the corner of his mouth, “Then how are you going to get your car fixed, Prom Queen? If you don’t go with me then I don’t have the parts. If I don’t have the parts, you don’t have a ride.”

“Have somebody else work on it. Hell, I’ll have it towed to a shop a couple towns over and pay for the damn labor. I don’t care as long as it means I don’t have to spend one more goddamn minute of my life with your miserable ass!”

A loud snort sent waves of anger racing under your skin, “Good luck with that, princess. You take it anywhere else and you won’t be able to afford to get it fixed. They’ll take advantage of you the minute they see the pretty teacher in the tight sweater walk in. Enjoy walking to work once winter hits, sweetheart because you won’t have wheels.”

“I did it this past winter and I can do it again if I have to,” you stated, refusing to back down. The last thing you needed after the mess your divorce had been was to dive into another complicated situation. He might be beautiful. He might be sexy. Hell, he might be the most attractive man you’d ever laid eyes on but the stress that came along with him was not worth it.

“Suit yourself. I was doing you a favor,” he huffed, stepping back, holding his arms out wide. “You think you’d be a little more appreciative when someone offers you free labor. Guess you are the little stuck up bitch I thought you were from the moment I saw you at the lake.”

“Fuck you,” you hissed. “You have no idea who I am. You’ve never even bothered to find out.”

Your feet slammed down on the pedals, flying away from him as fast as you could so he couldn’t see the tears that were already blurring your vision.

___________________________________________________________

You sat on the floor of your living room, cartons of the Chinese food you’d grabbed sitting on the coffee table in front of you. You spooned out some rice and then some almond boneless chicken onto your plate. Grabbing an egg roll, you took a large bite, wishing for the familiar comfort food to fill the gaping void within you. The sweet and savory combination filled your mouth but it brought no joy. You could not shake the feeling of dismay and agitation you felt after your confrontation with Eddie this afternoon.

You’d tried to let it go. You came home and did a load of laundry, cleaned the house from top to bottom, all the things you usually put off because you were bone tired by Friday afternoon. But today you’d needed to be busy, your body tense with unsettled energy. None of it had helped, not even the three mile bike ride round trip to pick up the food had stopped your brain from going round and round, picking apart every single moment of your encounter.

Eddie obviously had baggage. Hell, it sounded like he had an entire luggage set, possibly a U-haul’s worth that he was dragging behind him everywhere he went. It sounded as if the man had been through some of the most awful shit imaginable and you felt for him, you really did, but it wasn’t your job to save him. And it didn’t excuse him treating you like garbage. You couldn’t even manage to be his friend. What in the world had Steve been thinking, throwing around the word love? Yeah, like that was ever going to happen.

You took a deep swig of the extra large glass of wine you’d poured yourself, wishing you could just make him go away but you couldn’t. Your brain insisted on keeping him in the forefront. What was it about him that wouldn’t let you rest? That had you in some kind of chokehold? No, it wasn’t your job to save him but you found that you really wished you could even though he was so rude to you. You wanted to be the one. You wanted to see those eyes melt, that smile that lit up his whole face, and you wanted it to be for you. Shit, you were even more messed up than you’d thought, pining for some guy who was clearly not interested.

You picked up the movies you’d grabbed from Family Video before you stopped at the Chinese place. You’d grabbed The Craft, Scream, and Romeo and Juliet. Romeo and Juliet was out for now. You couldn’t stomach the thought of a romance right now. It had seemed like a good idea at the time because even though it was a romance, it was tragic but tragic was the definition of your life currently. Even with the two of them dying in the end, you did not feel up for gushy words and goo-goo eyes.

Gushy words and goo-goo eyes were not in your near future and that was okay. Alone seemed okay. Alone was probably what you needed right now anyway. Sure, you and Cam had been split up for a year but the ink on the divorce papers was barely dry. Getting into any relationship right now was a horrible idea, something you shouldn’t even be considering. Maybe you would just embrace the inevitable turn your life was going to take, go down to the shelter, adopt a handful of cats, and become the crazy single lady you were destined to become anyway.

A knock at the door startled you. You jumped as your wine sloshed over the side of your glass.

“Shit!” you exclaimed, grabbing a paper towel, mopping at the front of your shirt. Damn. At least you’d gone with the white instead of the red tonight or your shirt would be a goner.

Sighing, you tossed the paper towel down onto the coffee table and made your way to the door, annoyed with whoever decided to interrupt your quiet evening to sulk. You weren't in the mood to be good company for anyone. Pulling open the door, your eyes went wide, an audible squeak releasing from your lips when you found Eddie standing on your front porch, a brown paper bag in his hands.

He clearly mistook your surprise for annoyance because he stepped back, holding the bag up in front of him as if it were a white flag of surrender. You could not wrap your brain around Eddie Munson, the guy who’d just a few hours ago called you a stuck up bitch, standing on your porch. What in the hell was he doing here? Had he not gotten the message? What was with this guy?

“Look, I know I was a dick and if you don’t want to talk to me, then fine. I get it. You’d have every right to but I…” His spare hand ran over his face as he groaned. “I can be a total asshole sometimes. Okay? I know that and I don’t mean to be. I just get so damn mad sometimes. It’s…forget it. It doesn’t matter. Anyway, I didn’t know if you’d eaten or anything and Max said you liked the BLT at the diner so I brought you one.”

You stared at him silently, your eyes going down to the bag and then back up to his face, your brain racing to catch up to the words coming out of his mouth, trying to make sense of what was happening right now.

“You brought me food?”

“Yeah…I mean, you do eat, right?” he asked, a hopeful smile on his face, looking at you as if he were talking to a bomb that could go off at any moment.

“Obviously I eat. Is this your idea of an apology?”

“Well, yeah,” shrugged Eddie. “I was a jerk and I’m trying to make up for it.”

“Have you ever considered just saying you’re sorry? I find that works really well. You know, actually admitting that you feel bad because you were wrong?” you demanded, your confidence returning as your anger returned, remembering the nasty words spat from his mouth in the school parking lot.

“Oh come on. I bought you food. Doesn’t that count?”

“Not really,” you insisted, folding your arms, leaning your shoulder against the doorframe. You turned your head, gesturing to your coffee table covered in cartons. “Besides, I already have Chinese food so I’m all set for dinner but thanks.”

You grabbed the door, moving to close it, done with this conversation. This guy was insufferable. He couldn’t even manage a real apology. Before you fully closed it, his hand shot out, pushing back, resisting.

“Okay, okay. Look, I’m sorry, alright?” he groaned, those brown eyes beseeching you to accept it, to not make this worse for him than it already was. “I’m sorry I was a dick. I shouldn’t have called you a bitch.”

“Damn. That looked so painful for you,” you teased with a smirk, impressed but also unable to help yourself from torturing him just a bit.

“It really was so please don’t make me do it again,” Eddie pleaded but the muscles in his face relaxed, his mouth cracking into a smile that was like a beam of light breaking through a suffocating darkness. “Anyway, I’ll just leave this with you.” He held the bag out in front of him. “Maybe you can have it for lunch tomorrow or something. Sorry about bringing you food you didn’t need.”

“Wow. Two sorries from you in a matter of a few minutes. I’m impressed.” You glanced back at your coffee table, the ridiculous amount of food you’d ordered just like you always did when you got Chinese.

You were suddenly overcome with the desire to not spend the night alone wallowing. You didn’t just want to not be alone, you specifically wanted Eddie to stay. It was so stupid. You knew it was stupid but suddenly you found you couldn’t bear the thought of him just walking away even if you might be playing with fire when his mood shifted once again. Maybe you were setting yourself up for pain but you found yourself willing to get burned if it meant spending time with him.

You cleared your throat, filled with uncertainty at the prospect of being rejected by him, your words wavering as you spoke, “Actually, I ordered way too much food. I am never going to be able to eat all that. You’re welcome to share with me. I mean, if you haven’t eaten dinner yet.”

Eddie suddenly looked like a deer in headlights, his expression twisting into surprise. His eyebrows raised, his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water, clearly stunned by your offer and you instantly wished you could take it back. You just wanted to reach out and pull the words back into your mouth. Of course he didn’t want to join you. He was probably just trying to make nice for the sake of the group, trying to make sure he didn’t get told off by his friends again for being a jerk to you. That didn’t mean he wanted to willingly spend time with you.

“You know what? Forget it,” you backtracked, shaking your head, a forced laugh that was both awkward and far too loud bursting from you. “You probably grabbed something at the diner, right? I’m sure you don’t want to spend your Friday night hanging…”

“Yeah,” Eddie interrupted, nodding. His lips pursed together in a pout that had your knees wobbling. “Yeah, I would, actually. I love Chinese. I didn’t get anything at the diner. I was kind of in a rush because I didn’t really want to bring you cold food. Cold food doesn’t seem like a great apology. I mean, no one wants to eat cold fries. I mean, I have eaten cold fries because you’ll eat anything when you’re stoned, you know? Jesus Christ.” He sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. “Okay. Shutting up now. Anyway, yeah…I mean, if you’re not taking the offer back then yeah, I would like to share your Chinese food.”

“Okay. I mean, no, I’m not taking my offer back,” you laughed, stepping back and waving your arm toward the living room. “Come on in.”

Eddie stepped inside, his eyes moving around the small space as he walked, roaming over the kitchen that was in such need of a complete renovation and the living room, the photographs you had displayed on the walls. He stopped, examining a picture of you with your parents and your sister from when you went to Yellowstone National Park when you were nine.

“This you?” he questioned with a wry smile, his finger pointing at you in your brown bell bottoms and a garishly bright orange tunic with yellow flowers.

“Yeah, that’s me. My mom was really into seventies fashion if you couldn’t tell from all of our outfits. Pictures of me from two until about eleven all have highly questionable fashion choices.”

Eddie chuckled, “You don’t want to see my pictures then. In fourth grade my Uncle got me a denim jacket and pants for pictures with a plaid collared shirt. It’s…unfortunate.” He made his way down the line, pausing and tapping on a picture from six years ago, you at twenty-four, rocking ripped jeans, a flannel, and dark make-up. “Damn. Teach is looking all badass.”

“Nirvana concert in Chicago,” you told him with a quiet laugh. “My best friend…well, my ex best friend and I went. That was 1990, I think. We had the most amazing few days. The concert was epic, something I will never forget but we also did all the touristy crap in Chicago. We saw the Bean, ate deep dish pizza, and hit up Old Navy Pier. We went out dancing and drinking and stumbled back to the hotel at three in the morning. We used to do shit like that all the time. She was my concert partner, my adventure buddy. At least she used to be.”

“Is she the one that…?” he trailed off as if he couldn’t bring himself to actually say the words, surprising you with his tact when so many other times he hadn’t cared if what he’d said bothered you.

You shrugged, “Yep. My best friend since sophomore year. I didn’t think anything could ever change our friendship but walking in on her bouncing on top of your husband kind of changes things.”

“Damn. That’s really messed up. Like, the lowest of the low. What kind of friend does that shit?”

“They claimed it just kind of happened and they never meant for it to. Then once I figured out it wasn’t a one time thing, they said they never wanted to hurt me but they just hadn’t been able to deny their feelings for each other. Usual cheater bullshit speak.”

“So, they weren’t just fucking?”

“Oh no,” you snorted, gesturing for him to follow you to the food. You sat down on the floor and Eddie followed suit, his knee brushing against yours, the tiny contact creating a ripple effect through your entire body that quickly turned into a tidal wave of desire. “She’s living with him in my house. Well, I guess it’s not my house anymore. Nothing is mine anymore. He got the house, all the furniture, my car, the dog…Cam made sure he took absolutely everything he could before he was officially done with me like he was the one who had something to be spiteful about.”

“Jesus. Sounds like a real asshole. Your dog, too?” Eddie’s eyes melted, just the way you’d hoped for them to, sweet ooey gooey brown that seeped right into your soul, warming it, coating it in a sticky barrier that was keeping the bad things away.

“Yep. My sweet Marley is now with Cam and Cassie.”

“Didn’t you fight him?”

You watched as Eddie grabbed an egg roll and took a bite, those full lips wrapping around the crispy dough. Jesus, his lips were perfect, like two plush pillows you wanted to sink into. He chewed, his eyebrows lifting, reminding you that he was waiting for an answer. You straightened up, leaning back against the couch.

“Oh, uh…well, I tried. I fought him for months but I’m a teacher and he’s a real estate agent. He sells big money homes, like six figure homes. I couldn’t afford the kind of lawyer that he could afford. It just kept going on and on, meeting after meeting. Every single time we’d come together and I would make a demand, he would counter it. I just got so tired of fighting. I got sick of having to deal with him all the time. Seeing him was…painful and awful and nasty. We could not be in the same room without saying the most hateful things. I just wanted it over, you know? I felt like I was stuck…just standing in one spot, like someone hit the pause button on my life and I wanted to fast forward to the part where it got good again. Hell, where anything happened again. So, I just signed the papers and let him have everything. That’s why I don’t have a car. I barely had anything when I moved. Once I made a down payment on this place, there wasn’t much left over. I had to save for a while. Hence walking to work in the freezing cold.”

“What an asshole,” Eddie said again, brushing his hands together, crumbs flying off and onto the table and floor. “Shit. Sorry about that.” He began to wipe his hand across the table, attempting to collect them.

You laughed, “It’s fine. I’ll just wipe it down and vacuum later. Don’t worry about it.”

“So, you caught them and then you left and they just shacked up together? And then after he was the dick who blew up your marriage, he left you with nothing?”

“Pretty much. Except they didn’t start shacking up together until a couple of months ago. They tried to claim that when I caught them it was the first time but I knew better. Turned out they’d been sleeping together behind my back for a year. I found some charges that didn’t make a whole lot of sense.” Your lips pressed together and you looked down at your hands. “Pretty stupid to not realize your husband and best friend are screwing around, huh?”

Then his fingers were on your chin, lifting it, forcing you to look into those eyes and your heart was going to propel forcefully from your chest and spill messily all over him. It was the most casual touch and yet the most intimate. It was causing emotions to stir within you that you would rather push back down but it was futile. No matter how many times you told yourself to forget this man, to not let him affect you, your body and your heart had other ideas.

His adam's apple bobbed hard in his throat as he swallowed, his eyes flicking down to your lips so quickly that you wondered if you’d just imagined it. You could have because you wanted it badly, wanted him to kiss you, wanted him to replace every touch, every thought of Cam. To record over it the way you used to record over your VHS tapes. Erase the bad, wipe it from existence as if it had never happened, new footage of something better, something good.

“You’re not stupid. That ex of yours is the one who’s stupid,” Eddie stated, his thumb coasting just under your bottom lip. You had to fight the urge to wrap your lips around it and pull it into your mouth. What in the hell was happening to you? “That ex best friend of yours is stupid. They both did something horrible and they lost you. That’s got to be the dumbest thing they could have ever done.”

Your breath caught in your throat, feeling as if you were on the edge of your seat. Was something about to happen? Adrenaline and anticipation coursed through you as Eddie’s face tilted down toward yours. His eyes moved to your mouth and this time you were certain it did because it wasn’t a fleeting glance. They lingered.

“Eddie…” you breathed, terrified to move, terrified of what was about to happen while also being terrified of what would happen if it did.

Those earth-toned eyes moved back up to yours, widening slightly as if just realizing what he was doing. He released your chin, clearing his throat as he leaned back. Your heart fell when he scooted just the slightest bit further away from you. He grabbed onto a carton of food, spooning some onto a plate.

“Anyway, yeah, what total assholes,” he muttered, shaking his head, his gaze now completely focused on his plate.

What in the hell was it about you that stopped him? The way he’d been looking at you, it sure seemed like he was interested but if he was then why did he stop himself? You hadn’t stopped him. You didn’t think you’d given any indication that you didn’t want it. You were certain you wouldn’t have been able to stop him even if you wanted to. Your body wanted this. Did he just get caught up in the moment and then remember it was you? The girl he only tolerated for his friends sake? Maybe he wasn’t into you like that.

“Umm…well, I picked up some movies and I was going to watch one while I ate if you wanted to watch with me,” you offered, attempting to salvage some of your bruised pride after his obvious reconsideration of kissing you.

“Sure, what did you get?” he asked, still purposefully not looking at you, only making the knot in your stomach twist that much worse. Definitely not interested. Jesus, you were an idiot.

“Romeo and Juliet, The Craft, and Scream.”

“Oh! Scream, definitely. I meant to get to the theater to see that but I never did.”

“Yeah, me neither. Kind of unheard of for a horror movie to make it out of the theater without me seeing it,” you commented, rising from the couch to pop the VHS into the player before sitting back down.

You immediately started focusing on your food but that knot in your stomach was making it hard to actually want to eat anything anymore so you gave up. Placing your hands on the couch, you pushed yourself up and onto it, wanting some more space between you and Eddie. A barrier between what you wanted and what he clearly did not, a safe space where the two wouldn’t meet, where you wouldn’t humiliate yourself.

“You like horror movies?” he inquired, following you up and onto the couch but about as far as he could be from you, sitting all the way in the opposite corner, only cementing your belief that he wasn’t interested in more than just hanging out.

“Oh yeah. I love them. I don’t know if there’s a horror movie out there that I haven’t seen. Cassie loved them too so she always went with me. That’s probably why I haven’t seen it yet. Cam couldn’t stand being scared. Her and I always did all the spooky stuff together, movies, haunted houses, that kind of thing.”

“Sounds like Cam’s a bit of a pussy on top of being an asshole,” snorted Eddie with a roll of his eyes. “So, what’s your favorite scary movie?”

“My favorite? Well…I am pretty partial to the original Halloween,” you answered. “You can’t do much better than the actual bogeyman, the embodiment of true evil. Some of the sequels not so much though.”

“Ugh, tell me about it. That third one was one of the worst things I’ve ever seen.”

“Season of the Witch? Yeah, could have done without that one. The entire plotline did not make any sense at all. Michael Myers wasn’t even in it. Like, what was the point? Honestly, if it wouldn’t have been called Halloween, I might have felt differently. It wasn’t an awful movie but it wasn’t at all what I expected. I know they said it was supposed to be an original movie, different movies all based on Halloween and Carpenter didn’t plan on continuing Michael Myers but how could you not? What about you?”

“Nightmare on Elm Street,” Eddie stated without hesitation. “Nothing beats Freddy Krueger. The man can kill you in your dreams. There’s no escaping his claw glove. That’s a real monster, man, one that can get you anywhere without even having to really touch you… can get you even in your own mind…”

He paused, his body stilling, eyes glazing over with that haunted look again as if he was witnessing some horror within his mind that you couldn’t see. Instinctually you reached out, placing your hand on his arm and he jumped, coming back to reality. He looked down at where your skin touched and pulled his arm back from you quickly, his spine straightening.

“Sorry. Uh…yeah, so anyway, I was thinking if you didn’t have plans tomorrow we could go to the junkyard and look for those parts for your car. It shouldn’t take too long. I won’t take up your whole Saturday but then I can start getting to work on it for you, possibly even have you behind the wheel within a couple weeks.”

“Oh…” You tried to calm the excitement that bubbled up within you at the thought of spending a day with Eddie, reminding yourself that it wasn’t what you hoped it to be. Hanging out together didn’t mean to him what it meant to you. You were going to have to get the hell over this one-sided attraction.

“I mean, we can do it another time if you’re busy. You got big plans with Harrington or something?” he questioned, looking at you from under those ridiculously long lashes, those full lips pressed together.

“Steve? Why would I have plans with Steve?” you asked, flabbergasted by the sudden question. What was it with him and Steve? Why did he keep asking you questions about him?

His tongue teased at the corner of his mouth, something you noticed was fairly common for him, like a nervous habit. Just like playing with his rings and as if he knew what you were thinking, there he went, twirling one of the chunky pieces of jewelry around his finger. He shrugged one shoulder.

“I don’t know. It kind of seems like maybe you two have a thing?”

“A thing?”

“Well, yeah. I mean, you two seem like maybe you like each other or something.”

“Me and Steve?” you laughed. The irony of it was just too funny. If he only knew how wrong he was. You’d probably be better off if you were into Steve but no, your brain couldn’t possibly make the smart decision. That would be too easy. “Where did you get that idea?”

Eddie’s fingers grabbed onto a chunk of hair, bringing it over his mouth. “Well…you guys looked pretty cozy at the bonfire and on the couch at Nancy and Jonathan’s. You were chatting all close at the roller rink the other night. I mean, to the casual observer, it would appear maybe you two were a thing. He is your type, isn’t he?”

“And what exactly do you think my type is?” you challenged, folding your arms over your chest as you stared him down.

“Oh no. I’m not going there. I will not be sticking my foot in my big mouth again,” chuckled Eddie, shaking his head. “No way. Anything I say is just going to piss you off.”

“Me? You’re the one who’s always getting pissed at me.”

“Am not,” he scoffed, blowing a raspberry at you.

You gasped, lifting one of the throw pillows and whacking him in the stomach. He threw his head back, that laugh that was like the most beautiful song rumbling out of him and you couldn’t help the pleasure you felt at knowing you’d caused it. It brought you more elation than you cared to admit that you could bring joy to this man who was so damn serious and surly all the time.

“Bullshit! You run hot and cold constantly. One minute I think maybe you like me and then the next it’s like you can’t stand to be in the same room with me.”

“Not true. I do like you.” Eddie’s eyebrows suddenly shot up his forehead and he began tripping over his words, appearing flustered. “I mean, like you’re cool, you know.” He shrugged. “You’re fun…to hang out with, like friends. We’re friends, right?”

“I don’t know. Are we?” you asked, genuinely wondering.

“Yeah.” He nodded, eyes rolling up to the ceiling and then back to you with a sigh. “I think we are. I mean, we’ve just had dinner together and we’re watching a movie. And not because we’re hanging with the group. We’re just hanging out, me and you. That’s friends stuff, right? That’s what friends do.”

“Yeah,” you agreed, leaning back against the armrest, pulling your knees into your chest. You wrapped your arms around your legs, propping your chin on top as you considered him. “Yeah, that’s what friends do.”

A pang of disappointment sounded in your chest at your own words. You couldn’t deny that you’d hoped he felt something more between you, that the brief hope you’d had that he thought about you differently was true. But he clearly didn’t so you tried to push those feelings away, focusing on the positive. At least he considered you a friend. After all, wasn’t that what you’d been trying for from the beginning? Just to be friends with him, just to get along?

“But I am free tomorrow to look for parts,” you said, bringing them back to the original question he’d asked.

“Cool,” he said simply, a small smile on his face, the two of you turning your heads to the television as the previews finished and the movie began.

Chapter 11

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thedemoninme141 · 8 months

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Love Me Leave Me.

This is not my writing id, I don't even write. This story was 3/4th written by my late best friend Celine, this is her id, she wrote all the stories here. She took her own life on August 20th, Her life was complicated and I do not feel comfortable sharing it with you guys, What I can share is what she wanted me to share, Her last wish in her last letter was to finish all her unfinished stories and give you guys all the love, I tried my best giving it the ending she instructed me to do, I am not a professional writer but I tried my best to finish her starting. I hope I did justice to her works. I had a few errors autosaving this work on tumblr. I don't know much about tumblr so the better version of this story is in her AO3 account , I would recommend reading it there. Here is the link https://archiveofourown.org/works/50014339 Celine's Works are here.

2 months, It has been 2 months since you came out as a lesbian and Wednesday, who tolerated you all year already hates you for it. You never thought someone's sexuality would affect Wednesday so badly that she had unleashed a torrent of hatred you never thought possible from someone who had tolerated your presence all year.

As the truth spilt from your lips to your so-called "trusted" group of friends, the fallout had been swift and merciless. Enid, who had been your last tether to friendship, now wore a pained look in her eyes, brimming with pity and sorrow.

Your friends, once close allies, had turned their backs on you. The very bullies you thought you had escaped, the ones Wednesday had once saved you from, now saw an opportunity. They hurled cruel words at you, shoved you into the girls' restroom, and locked you in there, leaving you to fend for yourself. The sight of creepy-crawly creatures, the same ones that had filled you with dread, now invaded your room. Someone had left behind intentional proof as footprints of a disembodied hand and a pair of boots. All these horrors could have been reported to Principal Weems, but you refrained. Nothing seemed to matter anymore, and the pain that once cut deep had numbed over time because you found another pain that cut even deeper. You found a solution, to cope with this pain, you found a greater one. A blade was all you needed, you had a collection of them already in these 2 months. Each cut, each red line, became a lifeline to relief from the relentless suffering that now consumed your existence. No one knew, not even "Detective all knowing" Wednesday, of course, you hid them in the bathroom.

The relentless bullying persisted day after day. Katherine and her siren friends, fueled by cruelty, would taunt you mercilessly in the school hallways, their taunts occasionally escalating to physical violence, leaving you sprawled on the unforgiving ground. Strange as it may sound, those physical bruises didn't hurt. What did hurt was when you entered the classroom an unknown disembodied hand dropped a bucket of real human blood on you. The classroom erupted in a chorus of cruel laughter, and even Wednesday had a smug smile on her face. She never smiled, did she? unless she was truly at peace. So yeah, you getting hurt gave her joy. The cuts were deeper that day but you were careful not to cut any vein, You had a collection of jackets now, without them you couldn't go to the classes now. You would love to cut yourself to shreds in front of Wednesday if it gave her joy, cause you loved her, she was the reason you were finally brave enough to come out.

Wednesday despised you, you made her do something she would never do, you made her hurt you. She hated how you were braver than herself to admit your feelings. Falling for someone was never part of her plan, yet you had made it happen. She resented you deeply for that, a resentment that drove her to darker actions. You hated spiders, you used to tell her how creepy they looked. You hated blood, it sent chills down your spine. You hated cuts, your pain tolerance was lower than 0. You hated bees, So she set about crafting a sinister contraption in your bathroom bathtub, a jar brimming with bees, poised to unleash their torment upon you the moment you unwittingly opened it. Her twisted plan was a desperate bid to make you feel the same way she did. That's when her eyes went to a small box, and as always curiosity filled her mind, She took the box carefully and opened it, only to find razor blades, a lot of them, and a small knife. Some of the blades had stains of dry blood on them, the blood on the knife looked recent. Always wearing jackets... Wednesday ran, she ran and ran, she had to find you, wherever you were. I love coffee, just not as bitter as you. Your voice ranged through her head. I really wish I could see you smile Your smile ran through her head. I love planting flowers, the blooming flowers make me happy. Now you wouldn't bloom yourself anymore. No no no, Wednesday didn't mean it, she couldn't know, she never thought you would turn to this way to cope with this pain, she had to find you, She had to find you, no matter where you were. She sprinted through the courtyard, desperately searching for any sign of you. Wednesday spotted Enid engaged in conversation with Ajax. She hurried over to the pair, her desperation evident in her voice. "Enid, have you seen Y/n anywhere?" Enid's anger flared at the mere mention of your name on her lips. "Why? So that you can hurt her more?" Enid had held her grudge against Wednesday ever since the bullying had begun. "No, I..." Before Wednesday could explain herself, her gaze shifted, catching sight of you entering the school gates, a shopping bag in your hand. Without thinking, she sprinted towards you, her heart pounding. But you backed away as soon as you noticed her approach, and Wednesday couldn't help but notice the profound sadness etched in your eyes – the same eyes she had avoided for the past two painful months. "I need to speak with you," Wednesday implored, her voice trembling with sincerity. "No," you replied firmly, attempting to walk away and put distance between you two. "Please, this is important," Wednesday persisted, her desperation driving her to reach out and grab your arm in a plea for your attention. You walked as fast as you could to your dorm, You can't feel like this anymore, you have to get to your room and cope. Wednesday followed you, determined to talk to you, she can't let you cut any more. "Y/n please!" She begged. You didn't even look back, She ran in front of you making you finally stop. "What do you want from me?" You asked, tears in your eyes, your voice broken with sorrow. The bag held close to your chest made Wednesday doubt. She looked at the empty hallway to make sure that it was only you and her and then snatched the bag away from you and emptied the contents on the floor, painkillers, sleeping pills and a new sharp knife. All the things that she liked, yet she felt so much dread in her heart. "I am sorry." She whispered, her voice shaking, You hurriedly picked all of them up before anyone could show up. "Show me." She said as you stood up. "Show me what I've done." She said as she tried to grab your hand, "Please don't." You said. "SHOW ME WHAT I'VE DONE." She said gritting her teeth in anger, but not on you, never on you, it was on her own self. She slowly grabbed your hand and took it up to herself, She removed the jacket sleeves slowly to see your arm filled with dozens of cuts, some deeper than they should've been. "Please." You cried now. She let go of your hands as she was frozen in her spot and you ran into your room.

Tears weren't stopping. Maybe another Tears weren't stopping. Maybe another Tears weren't stopping. Maybe another Tears weren't stopping. Maybe a little bit deeper. Tears weren't stopping. Maybe a little bit deeper. Tears weren't stopping. Maybe a little bit deeper. Tears weren't stopping. Maybe a little bit deeper. Tears weren't stopping. Maybe a little bit deeper. Tears weren't stopping. Maybe a little bit deeper. The tears finally stopped.

Outside your door, Wednesday's voice trembled, the weight of the past 12 hours pressing down upon her. She cleared her throat softly before speaking. "Y/n," she said, the sound echoing through the stillness of the corridor. "I know you're in there." A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she continued, her words tinged with vulnerability. "I am sorry, for everything." Admitting her own emotions had never been her strong suit, but she realized that acknowledging her mistakes was the first step toward repairing the damage she'd done. "I understand that some things can't be fixed, but maybe, just maybe, we can find a way to mend what's broken and hold it together." Wednesday's voice wavered as she opened up further, her admission of feelings a rare glimpse into her inner world. "Y/n, you made me feel things – things I've spent my entire life running from, things I've been terrified of. I never wanted to become like my parents, but now it seems like embracing those emotions might be worth it, especially if it means being with you. I was too blind to see it, too wrapped up in my hatred for love, but I know you feel the same for me. Please, just let me in... Please..." Her legs threatened to buckle beneath her, but she refused to give in to her own weakness. Wednesday's heart ached as she contemplated walking away, but then, a sudden, painful sting in her chest stopped her in her tracks. "Y/n, at least answer me, and I won't bother you anymore," she implored softly. "Y/N," she continued, desperation lacing her words, "Tell me to go away, and I will leave, nevermore, if you ask." But the only response was silence, hanging in the air like an unbreakable barrier. With trembling hands, Wednesday retrieved her lockpick, a skill she had mastered long ago. However, this time was different, her hands shook as she struggled to unlock your door. After a few tense moments, she finally succeeded. What she discovered inside, though, was more than she had braced herself for. There you lay, eyes closed, seemingly at peace on the bed, although only peace was in your expression. The room was stained red, with your blood marking the bed, the floor, and the glinting knife nearby. Even your hands bore the evidence of your anguish, but what struck Wednesday the most was your serene smile. Approaching cautiously to your lying figure, She didn't need to check for a pulse to recognize a lifeless body, but she did it anyway. She wanted to hope and she needed you. But she found none. "I am sorry," she whispered, her voice broken with regret. Her gaze shifted to the heavy sleeping pills on the floor, all still intact. It became clear that you hadn't chosen this method. You chose the painful one, leaving the easy one for her, Good. Enid and the others looked for you and Wednesday, when they found you two, you two were finally each other's, holding each other, your arm on Wednesday's waist, her arm on yours, Wednesday laying on your chest, peacefully, cause she finally found her final home.

Alternate Less Sad Ending Author's note: For Celine, the most heart-warming and accepting person I knew, I would try to write and alternative good ending to this story if you guys want. For her recent readers, Did I do it right to her style?

#wednesday x reader #wednesday addams x reader #wednesday adams x reader #wednesday addams x female reader #wednesday #angst #wednesday addams x you #wednesday addams angst #wednesday addams fanfic #wednesday angst

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countessqin · 9 months

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"Mission 《Happy Birthday Mom》"

Characters : Jing Yuan x fem!reader (romantically; wife-husband relations), Yanqing x fem!reader (familiar; mother-son relations)

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[Author Notes]

Firstly, yes I finally finished it! It was half written in my drafts for 2 weeks... God... burn out is an... interesting thing. It is kind of connected with my other writting, which you can find here (^*^)/♡ I was kind of lazy, so if you see similarities in what characters say, yes you see them right. Maybe I will change them a bit later, when I will get some ideas/inspo. You can find masterlist with my other writings here (^*^)/♡ Apologies for typos, mistakes and if it stopped making any sense at some point.

Thank you for reading and have a nice day/evening!

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Small bio:

Name - [Name] Age - ??? Occupation - Ambassador/Negotiator of the Xianzhou Luofu Status - Married

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It was august which meant it was your birthday month. Yanqing and Jing Yuan met at your estate's garden to plan a surprise for you. How did you know about it? Well, each time you saw them both together, the moment they saw you they quickly changed topic, or began sword practice or continued sword practice. Of course, knowing your husband and son for so long you understood, what they may be plotting, but what their surprise was, you didn't know.

On the day of your birthday, both you and your husband were pretty busy dealing with work. The amount of papers, including charters of cooperation between Luofu and other interastral entities, some internal affairs documents, and so on that you and your husband had was... very impressive. So, when you woke up, you didn't see your husband, he left you a breakfast, cooked by himself, bouquet of flowers as well as note, which included, congratulation with your birthday, apology that both of you couldn't spend morning together and promise for some "grand surprise".

Now it was noon, and you were sitting in your office when the door opened revealing Cloud Knights Lieutenant.

- Advisor [Name],- he said bowing. You looked up from your papers. Blonde boy, in Cloud Knight uniform was standing before you.

- Yanqing, I told you so many times, no need to address me as "Advisor" when it is informal situation, and I'm sure you are here not for the official business,- you said while looking at boy.

- Sorry Mom, - boy said

- So what bring you here now? I thought you have sword practice with dad now?

Boy scratched his head:

- oh... about that... Gene- Dad had some meeting and then Lady Fu came to give report from Divination Commission... Mom, I know that you are also busy, but maybe you will have some spare time to train with me?

You looked at your son then on piles of the documents on your desk. Among these piles there was a photo frame with photo of all your small family - you, Jing Yuan and Yanqing. Both you and blonde boy were happily smiling at camera, while General looked at both of you with warm smile. Next to it was another photo frame, not with photo but drawing done by 6 y.o. Yanqing. It was a simple ink drawing of you favorite flower.

After some thoughts you called your secretary, and asked if you have had any meetings that can't be rescheduled on another day. After hearing that there were no meetings today, you decided to go with Yanqing. "Piles of paperwork will wait",- you thought for yourself. When working with documents you were much faster than you husband, paperwork didn't bring you boredom, but peace and concentration.

After you told your secretary, that they are also free for today, and can go home earlier, you turned to Yanqing.

- Let's go!,- you said taking boy's hand in yours. Yes he is 14 now, so what? You are his mom, and you love him. On the way to the private training ground, which was located in your estate, Yanqing was telling you different stories from his day, about his Cloud Knights, about swords from Artisanship Commission, about his allowance and that he still didn't waste it, but instead began saving it.

When you entered estate, you went straight to training ground, while Yanqing excused himself, and went to bathroom. 5 minutes passed, then another 5 minutes and you began to worry. What takes Yanqing so long? Did something happen? Maybe he ate something not right and now is dealing with stomachache? No way, you knew for sure that there was no way the food Cloud Knights ate would be expired. Maybe something urgent came? But he would tell you or write message. The more you thought the more worried you became. So, without the second thought, you went straight into home, to the wing where Yanqing lived, to see maybe something happened. On your way there you saw the door of living room closed. Why though? You never closed that door, because there was no need to do so. The room was big, and with open doors hallway that led there also was looking quite long and spacious. Maybe Yanqing also saw this and got ambushed? Without the second thought, you grabbed thick book from the bookshelf in hallway, you know just in case if something will go wrong.

When you lightly opened the door, you were greeted with balloons and confetti. Before you were standing culprits. Yanqing was holding cracker with confetti, widely smiling, while Jing Yuan was standing near boy with both hands behind his back. Behind them were piles of boxes decorated in different colors of gift packaging. You carefully placed the book on the table near entrance to the room.

- Happy birthday Mom!,- said Yanqing, while setting confetti in the air once again. You were standing there surprised and speechless. Boy saw the unreadable emotion on your face and started to worry, when you bursted into laughing.

- Oh dear Lan, you both will be the reason of my death someday,- you said while coming closer to the culprits of you worry.

- My dearest, we didn't have an intention to scare you,- your husband said, while hugging you. Yanqing also hugged you,- yeah mom, we didn't want to! I heard from my Cloud Knights about such "surprise" and so I proposed Dad to try it! Sorry that we scared you...

You looked at your son, then at your husband. Yes, you indeed got scared, what if someone broke into your house? What if someone was trying to harm your family? These thought were making you worried. But looking at them both, they weren't harmed, they didn't have bad intentions, and you didn't get scared that much.

- It's okay Yanqing, no need to apologize,- you said, while smiling warmly.

After that, Jing Yuan took your hand and led you to an armchair near which pile of presents weas located. When you sat down, you felt something soft on your head. It was a flower crown made out of your favorite flowers. Then Yanqing shyly handled a stroll to you.

- Happy birthday Mom! You are the best mom a person could wish for, I really really love you, here it is the ink painting I did for you. It's a [your favorite animal]!

While Yanqing was talking you opened a stroll. A carefully drawn ink [your favorite animal] was looking at you.

- I-i'm sorry if it doesn't look very professional, but I-

- It looks amazing. The best ink drawing of [your favorite animal] I have ever seen,- you said, while looking at painting. Of course it meant a lot to you, looking at it, you felt how much love and care went into this piece of art.

- Thank you mom. Happy birthday once again,- said Yanqing while hugging you,- I wish you happiness, less stress and-and so all your dreams will come true! I love you mom!

- Well, now now let's not forget about other presents,- you heard your husband's voice. After that as if stricken by lightning Yanqing ran out the living room, the way your kitchen was located. You looked at your husband who just smiled.

- Kids these days,- after that he took small handmade wooden box out of his pocket,- my dear sparrow, happy birthday to you. No matter how much time will pass, I will never forget such important day, the day love of my life came into this world. I wish you to always stay happy, healthy and positive. And always remember, you are wonderful person, my little sparrow. I love you, [Name],- after that you felt a warm sensation on your lips. When you opened wooden box, you saw a pair of golden earrings with ruby.

The next second, Yanqing entered the living room with tray. The room filled with scent of raspberries, chocolate and home-made cupcakes.

- Mom, dad and I also tried to bake your favorite cupcakes! Here,- young boy said while handing you tray with sweets. You took one cupcake with [your favorite color] icing. When you took a bite a sweet taste of raspberries filled your mouth as well as small hint of mint.

- So, dearest, what do you think?,- Jing Yuan asked with curiosity. Yanqing stood Infront of you with anticipation seen in his eyes.

- It tastes so good!,- you said with your eyes beaming, - my dears, come here,- you opened your arms for a hug and both Yanqing and Jing Yuan came closer and hugged you.

- It looks like we did a pretty good job, don't you think so?,- Jing Yuan teasingly asked.

You lightly hit his arm, a small chuckle left his lips. Yanqing stood there hugging you, while rolling his eyes on his dad's comment.

- Of course you both did! Thank you both, my dears, - you said giving each of them kiss. On forehead for Yanqing and on cheek for Jing Yuan.

- Happy birthday to the best mom!

- Happy birthday, my dearest sparrow

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[Authors Note]×2

- The bunch of presents that was mentioned there, consists not only with presents from Jing Yuan and Yanqing, but also from [Name]'s colleagues and friends! (They have sent them, because they knew that our [Name] may be busy with work, not to distract her)

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#honkai star rail #hsr #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #honkai star rail jing yuan #hsr jing yuan #honkai star rail yanqing #hsr yanqing #qin's stories~

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killmongerskeepermain · 1 year

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Her Heart // Chapter 1 // Shuri

Summary: You left behind the life of a wardog and continued on as Y/N of Wakanda and the heart of the black panther. Your world is suddenly flipped upsiode down when an old target kidnaps you and the Queen of Talokan. Can Shuri keep her head on straight and get you back before it too late?

Pairing: Shuri x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Spoilers // Mentioned Character Death

Chapter 1 // Chapter 2 //

Today was supposed to be simple. Shuri would train with the Dora Milaje in the early hours of the morning. Becoming the black panther meant she had to train harder than when she would spar with you. Back when T'Challa held the mantle. You being one of the best spies in Wakanda meant you could put up a good fight. Then she would spend time with you working in the lab. You had some designs for some new weapons to show her. You were proud of them. So she was excited to see what you came up with. This was the last thing on her mind. Namor was the last thing on her mind.

"How dangerous are these threats?" Shuri asked as the council gathered in the throne room.

"Reports are telling us that Namor has resurfaced. With clear intentions of destroying Wakanda." Okoye said with her hands behind her back. Scared? No. Worried? Of course but she couldn't let the council know that.

"Namor? I thought there was a truce with Talokan?" Ayo questioned and Shuri began zoning out. Namor was still set on attacking Wakanda? After everything he's already done. Yes, Shuri demanded a truce but in the end, he killed her mother. Something she could not forgive. When will it end? Shuri refused to let someone else she cares about fall due to his actions.

"Princess." A voice tore her from her trance and she looked up to see all eyes on her.

"I'll go to the checkpoint with Okoye and Ayo. If he's planning something, I must stop him before any attacks happen. Even if that means killing him this time. We leave in an hour." The black panther sneered as she stood from the throne both her mother and brother once sat. The room remained silent as she walked out with a heavy heart. Everyone knew where she was headed. To inform her dearest of this mission. A mission she may or may not return from. Namor couldn't attack again. Hasn't Wakanda mourned enough? Buried enough. Lost in her thoughts she entered the lab, her eyes finding your form almost immediately as you talked to other scientists. A small smile appeared on her lips as you waved your hand over the floating screen.

"Good evening, Princess." You perked up upon hearing Grio announce her presence and you went up to hug her. You may be a trained spy but she's the only one to make you smile brighter than you have before. She hugged you back and you pulled back before your smile fell. Her eyes held sadness and you caressed her cheek.

"What bothers you my love?" You asked with concern laced in your voice and she kissed your palm.

"Everyone out! Now!" She demanded and all the other scientists scattered out of the lab. You looked up at her with confusion evident on your features as you sat down the clipboard in your hands.

"Why did you send them off? What's going on?" You were worried now as she took a deep breath. Whatever she was about to tell you, isn't easy for her to say.

"We've gotten reports that Namor is planning to launch another attack. Your body went still as you held the gasp that threatened to leave you.

"And who said that? Where did you hear that from?" You questioned and she held your arms.

"One of Talokan's people came to the river border last night. Told us to be ready. He wants to finish what he started." She told you and you had to hold back tears. You knew she was about to go out there. You wouldn't be surprised if she was still hell bent on killing him. After what he did to her mother.

"Are you-" you couldn't finish your sentence as she slowly nodded and a small whimper finally cracked. "Why? Why now? He has a family now, what could his reasoning be behind this attack?"

"I don't know. That's what I'm going to find out."

"You can't go out there. If any of this is true, he could very well be trying to separate you from the palace." You started to panic and she grabbed your hands.

"I have to sthandwa. I might be able to talk some sense into him. If he is planning an attack I need to know when and why." She pulled you closer by your waist, hoping to calm you down.

"No. No! What if it's a trap set for you?" You argued and she sighed. She knew you would not agree so easily. "If he does want to attack, taking you out first is a battle strategy. He almost took you from me once. I cannot bear that pain again."

"I'll return to you Y/N." She held your face and you shook your head. You closed your eyes as she rested her forehead against your own. "I promise you."

"If you die on me, I'll resurrect you and kill you myself." You stated and she couldn't help the smile on her lips. No matter how serious you were. You almost never had to use your abilities. You gave up training them after you failed to bring the queen back. Her lips found yours in a passionate kiss as if to seal the promise. Your fingers dug in her hair and her hold on your waist tightened. The kiss held much more than a promise. It meant, come back to me. I love you. Be careful. Everything you couldn't say without the dam breaking.

You didn't even hear Okoye enter the lab until she cleared her throat. "M'Baku and the Jabari tribe have been notified. It's time to go princess." The two of you parted and you bit your lips as you hugged her one more time.

"Please-"

"I know my love. I promised, didn't I? Keep the lab from falling into chaos until I get back." She asked before backing away from you. The two of you didn't release the hold on the other's hand until she had gotten further away. You felt empty when her hand slipped from yours but you held up. No more tears. She was gonna come back. You had to be strong. She was the black panther. Everything will be just fine. You still followed behind her as the two went to the elevator.

"I'm gonna see you off." You told her and she nudged you with her shoulder. You looked over at her trying your best to keep the tears in your eyes. She rested her forehead on yours and you sighed as you leaned into her. The doors opened and the wind from the royal jet had your curls blowing in the wind.

The aircraft had been prepared and you walked out with Shuri. Intertwining your hand with hers as you neared the landing dock. She squeezed your hand in reassurance which you greatly appreciated. On the outside you may have it all together. But you were torn apart on the inside. You can't lose her. Not now. She's to become your wife in a couple of months. And you hers. When the time came she turned to you before kissing your lips one more time. It was quicker than the one you shared in the lab but held all the same passion. You watched as she walked into the jet with Okoye and Ayo not far behind. Aneka walked up to you before putting a comforting arm around you. Just like you, her love was going on what could be a suicide mission. You leaned into her embrace as you watched the jet disappear into the clouds. A light hand on your shoulder tore your attention from the sky and onto Aneka. "They will be okay. She will be okay. I am here if you need anything Y/N." You nodded before turning on your heels to go to the room you shared with Shuri. There you changed into a black battle suit you had stored away in your closet. Shuri had it made for you after you fought off some mercenaries who came to steal vibranium. You let out a sigh as you prayed for Okoye, Ayo, and Shuri's safety. Your eyes opened and you quickly ran to the lab. Upon entering you clapped your hands and looked at all the scientists present.

"Okay. Wakanda might be in danger. Those weapon plans I went over with all of you. It's time. We need to get them prepared for Shuri to look at upon her arrival back to the palace." You grabbed your clipboard and turned to the page with the vibranium daggers you had drawn out. You weren't going to deem yourself useless again. "Starting with these."

// The River Border //

Shuri felt as if her heart was beating out of her chest as she used the conch Namor left behind to call to him. Her thoughts ran wild as they waited. Why would he attack now? Why does he want to attack? Wakanda hasn't done anything to Talokan to receive such threats. She just wanted this to be a bad dream so she'd wake up next to you in your bed. The sun beaming down on you making you look like an angel. You would kiss her good morning and the two of you would lay there for a while talking about the wedding. Who you wanted to invite. What type of flowers you wanted in your bouquet. All the small details.

"Princess." Okoye called out as the water rippled, showing he arrived. She balled her fist as he stepped out of the water with Attuma close behind. He seemed a bit confused with the call but stopped at the edge of the water upon feeling the tension in the air.

"Princess. To what do I owe this meeting?" He questioned as Okoye and Ayo stood on alert.

"Don't play dumb with me Namor. We heard about your plan." She spat and now he frowned.

// The Palace //

"Ms. Y/N. The queen of Talokan is here to see you and the princess. She is waiting in the throne room." You frowned at the announcement Grio made. What was she doing here? How dare she show her face in Wakanda. You shot up from the computer and walked to the throne room where Namora stood by her queen. The queen saw the way your brows nearly touched because of the frown on your face and she gave a slight bow.

"You seem troubled." She said holding a blue hand on her swollen belly.

"Why are you here?" You asked and she was a bit taken aback by the sudden outburst. You had always shown her with respect. "Shouldn't you be standing by your husband?"

"I am here because I was summoned here." She replied and now you were the one confused.

"Summoned by who?" You questioned and she was a little concerned by your lack of knowledge on the information.

"One of the Dora Milaje called from the river border. Said there was something you and the princess needed to speak to me about. But it seems you have no idea what I'm talking about." She stated and you slowly backed away.

"We didn't send anyone. It would've been one of us to invite you personally on important matters. Not Dora Milaje. Especially not a single Dora Milaje." You told her and you caught the way Namora tensed.

"Where is the princess?" Namora asked, holding her weapon. Her eyes scanned the throne room as you sped to the table and grabbed your kimoyo beads.

"The princess has gone to the river border to confront Namor. Someone from Talokan alerted us that Namor was planning an attack." You told her and she frowned.

"He has made no such plans. Someone from Talokan? That's not true." She said taken aback and you sighed running a hand through your hair. You didn't like where this conversation was going. Neither of you knew about what was just revealed. It couldn't have been-

"Shit. Namora I'm going to need your help. We both have to stay with her at all times. She cannot leave this palace! Grio lock us down!" You shouted and the queen had fear rush across her features.

"What's happening?" She exchanged looks with Namora who was prepared to protect K'uk'ulkan's queen with her life.

"This whole thing was a setup. Both Talokan and Wakanda are without their protectors. You were lured here. The queen of Talokan. Who is currently pregnant with the child of a God. Someone knows something." You told her and she froze. Fear for her unborn child's life rushing through her body.

"I'm going to do my best to keep you safe. With Namora here that's more than possible. Come, we have to get to the lab." You stretched out a hand to the queen and she took it before the two followed you to the lab. You reached the lab where the scientist seemed to be surprised that you brought the Queen of Talokan here.

"What's the progress on those weapons?" You asked and one scientist spoke up.

"98%! Finishing the last one now."

"Hurry and print everything!" You shouted as you reached for the vibranium daggers you had finished. The blades were sharp to the touch and you slipped them into your boots. The last weapon, a vibranium short sword, had finished printing as Grio spoke out.

"Palace is locked down Ms. Y/N."

"Good." You grabbed a spare kimoyo bracelet and slipped it on Amera's wrist. "This is how we communicate. If we were to get separated for any reason, you can use these to contact me. I have the earrings as well so it won't be too noticeable. They can also reach the princess. And I'm almost certain Namor will be with her."

"Grio! Try to get in contact with Shuri." A couple minutes went by and you could hear your heartbeat in your ears. The pounding sound of a drum causing you to lose your breath.

"She didn't answer."

"Try again!"

// The River Border //

"Plan for what exactly?" Namor asked and Attuma stood in front of him.

"Your plan to attack Wakanda a second time. You were bold enough to send a message through one of your people." Okoye spat and his lips went into a thin line.

"I did no such thing. Besides, how do I know you're not pulling something on me. After requesting my wife come to your palace after my so-called threat of an attack." He spoke and Ayo looked over at Okoye. Neither of them had knowledge of this.

"We have no knowledge of this."

"What are you on about?" Shuri asked as her kimoyo beads vibrated on her wrist. She pushed to answer them this time and Y/N was on the other end.

"Shuri! Shuri, where are you?" She asked. Her voice held panic and worry.

"We're here with Namor. He claims he doesn't even know what we're talking about." Shuri told her dearest and the other end was silent.

"It was a setup." She said and everyone's attention turned to the princess with shock evident on their features.

"What do you mean a setup? Y/N what is happening?" Shuri became confused as her dearest was panicking on the other end.

"Amera. Namor's queen, said that a Dora Milaje came to the river border saying that we requested her presence at the palace. Apparently someone from Talokan said Namor was planning an attack. When I mentioned it to her she didn't even know what I was talking about." Shuri felt her heart drop to her stomach. Everyone has been tricked. Both leaders were drawn out from their kingdoms. "My love. I believe it's best for you to return back to Wakanda for I fear-"

A/N: Her Heart!!! But I plan to condense to longer and less chapters. Hope yall enjoy!! New fics coming soon!!!

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shai-manahan · 2 months

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Hi! It's been a while since I've talked about the upcoming updates, but I finally had a chance to actually sit down and make plans! (the life of a corporate slave, am I right? 🙃)

It has something to do with the changes I will be implementing on my patreon, though. I've thought for a while how to give content that's worthwhile of subscriptions while also making sure I can be comfortable with them, and in all honesty, I had a tricky time doing it. HM is too personal for me, as I used to talk about before, and some of the patreon benefits I promised before eventually felt too revealing - of my own thoughts and people whose lives were a huge inspiration for this story.

I will be talking about these changes and the update schedules as well below the cut.

UPDATES

I aim to finish at least half of HM's Book 1 this year. It seems to be a more realistic goal than forcing myself to finish everything right away (which tbh may have been a huge pressure I put on myself the past few years), though admittedly, things are unpredictable in the field I'm in; my job is full of overtime hours, and I spend most of my weekends trying to recover (or sick).

Still, I gotta finish it one way or another, and it's not going to write itself (though I wish it would!), so yeah, set realistic deadlines, pull out a few all-nighters, and maybe I'll actually get through it, who knows?

I do hope I'll have steadier finances by the time Book 2 starts so I can put more focus on writing and have sufficient energy for it, but that's a conversation for another day.

Changes in Prologue - Chapter 2

Okay. I know I promised not to make revisions until I write more chapters, but changing how some game mechanics work and reworking the stats made it a necessity, and I underestimated how much rewriting I'd have to do. A few scenes ended up not working well anymore, and I couldn't resist from revising a few clunky sections while I was at it.

Dialogue options were one of those that were significantly affected by the stat changes, but no worries, nothing is changed in the story -- meaning Wesley still fucks with the Ripper's life (oops), Richard still goes off doing whatever non-sus thing he's doing, you can still punch Bale (it's even a lot funnier this time), Bertrand remains a bitchy cop, and you'll still have your sad flashback with your former best friend/lover/crush or whatever they are to your MC.

The plan is to release the updated version of Prologue and Chapter 1 to patrons by the end of March (I will have a few days off work that week) and release it to the public once the new content is also ready, which I presume will be available next month (I will keep you all posted but I really hope I can get it done by then because it's been forever 🥲).

I might tweak Chapter 2 a little so the available portion can stand on its own rather than be divided into two parts, because it's just too long lmfao and is harming the pacing as I keep worrying about the length. I'm also incorporating a few suggestions a few folks gave me these past few months.

Succeeding chapters

I've probably said this before but things are bound to get more insane in HM once we're past the first three to four chapters. But also quicker to write in a way. They're the kind of scenes I thrive in, and while they have bigger variations, they're a lot more fast-paced, characters start being manipulative little shits, and the threats are more prevalent than ever. Your Ripper will not have a good time, but I certainly will (I say as I look at my outline and get sad doing it). There will be a few "breaks" in between, but this is not and will never be a light-hearted story. Anyway, I'm inclined to believe I'll be more consistent with updates when that time comes, so bear with me for now :')

PATREON CHANGES

This is getting long, so I'll just list the updated tier benefits and end the day with it. I'll be posting a schedule that I will be committing to (here and on patreon tomorrow morning), with the below details as well (so if you wanna stop here that's totally valid) but for now, here's the tentative list:

Tier 1

Early access - 4 days before a public update (this month will be an exception and you'll get the update as soon as the other tiers get it, too).

Sneak peeks and deleted scenes - I included the latter because apparently I delete a lot of great scenes

Hints for future revelations in the story - the categories will depend on results of polls; the hints may be about Bale's death, about Ripper's family, Pharos, Cyro, the ROs themselves, or the nightmares that the MC is getting, etc. Might be in form of vague conversations/dialogues between unknown characters, might be me dropping subtle info about those involved. Either way, it will be fun :). The polls and these hints will be given monthly.

Tier 2

Early access - 1 week before a public update

all the other benefits for Tier 1

monthly RO snippets - I'm still experimenting with this, but I might simply write MC x RO snippets (with different kinds of MCs for different scenarios because I deeply hate writing blank slate MCs, sorry)

a choice to see the POV of a character, decided through polls, for every chapter/update.

Tier 3

Early access - as early as it's available and goes through testing stages

all other benefits for previous tiers

Non-RO short stories

Previews on unintroduced characters :)

That's all for tonight! I am so tired lmfao but I hope you all are having a great weekend so far! See you tomorrow :)

#patreon #patreon changes #updates #hollowed minds progress update #interactive fiction #hollowed minds series #hollowed minds #wip #writing #hollowed minds book one #if wip #interactive novel

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amadwinter · 11 days

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Making of Monday - How NOT to Write a Long Fic

Haven't posted one of these in a hot minute! Story time: sometime around 2021, I decided I was sick of having all these ideas for Star Wars fics and never actually writing them. So I decided to buckle down, and write a damn fic.

But of course that didn't happen. What I did instead was try to plot out a long, winding, action-adventure story, and to do that, I decided to study to study from the masters. Or master. I wrote down all the chapter titles for every Lord of the Rings book, and was planning on modeling my story based off a similar pacing.

But of course that didn't happen either. And I realized that I was getting nowhere fast. So, I took out a different piece of paper, and with no plan in place, just started jotting down thoughts.

Warning: terrible formatting and terribly inconsistent handwriting below the cut

And as you can see, I didn't get far with unconnected ideas before I started planning once more.

Inspired by short fic I had just read, I wanted to write a long fic where a whole and hale Anakin Skywalker shows up on Tatooine some amount of years into exile. Seeing as how this was before the Obi-Wan Kenobi show came out, there was a lot of room for interpretation in canon. I could take ideas from Legends, make theories about what they were going to do with canon (and be extremely right about some of them), and just make shit up whenever I wanted to.

But immediately, I came to a question that I wanted an interesting answer to: where did this new Anakin come from, and how did he get to Tatooine? Time travel is simple, and not where I wanted to go. Something something Sith magic, yeah, whatever. Also not what I wanted to do. But dimension travel? Now, there was an idea.

Of course, because I am a planner, it couldn't be simple, now could it? It couldn't be just hand-wave the Force that caused it. There had to be a real, concrete, series of events that caused Anakin to appear out of thin air.

And thus began the Yeetverse.

A chain of 4 separate universes (plus 1 bonus one for my own torture amusement. And actually now with one more added on later!). A to B to C to D. It's far too complex for baby's first fanfic in a fandom, and yet the ideas would not stop flowing.

Yes, that was all just written because I couldn't stop thinking about these ideas. It may not seem like a lot, but any brave soul who attempts to read my handwriting can see that there are many things going on at once. (And the only thing I blocked out is the ending to what was meant to be the first fic in this chain, the thrill of the fall)

But for all those ideas, all that planning...

I haven't even finished the first fic I truly tried to write.

I actually have so much of it outlined. I even wrote the outlines of the first 2 chapters of the original fic idea that started it all down on paper.

But I haven't written more.

Why?

Turns out, I'm not good at writing long fics. Planning them? Yes. Finishing them? Hell no.

It will be 3 years since I came up with these ideas. I haven't given up hope yet that I might actually get around to writing all those fics one day, but one-shots and event fics have drawn my attention away.

Who knows; maybe I'll finally take another shot once I've finished up more of my posted WIPs.

#making of monday #writing things #not everything is a success #and that's okay

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that-one-anxious-mango · 1 year

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You + Me = US (1)

Summary: After a shocking discovery is made that you decide to keep to yourself out of fear..you realize your secrecy may be doing more harm than good.

Content: BIG ANGST. Reader feeling sad and conflicted. Appearance of a friend. Argument and Tension between Austin and reader. Tense and sad Austin. Just all around Angst.

A/N: Hello Beautiful humans! I hope you’re all well. I know this is something I hadn’t planned out putting out so soon. But seeing as ya’ll wanted the first part of the juicy angsty story I mentioned so bad..this is it. I hope you all enjoy because..yeah. Much love. *hugs*

P.S Please Always feel free to comment, reblog, and send me letters about the fic and anything else pertaining to the series! And also let me know to be added to the taglist! 🏷️

Taglist: @purejasmine , @wacoshuffle

---

So here you were.

One Bathroom Counter

Six tests.

Twelve brightly positive lines.

One Shocked Alana

And one terrified you.

The room was so silent you could have heard a pin drop.

You almost couldn't believe it.

You were pregnant and scared shitless.

Immediately you’d burst into tears while Alana who usually wasn’t one for traditional methods of comfort..did her best.

From there a hour crying session began until you got the strength to talk.

" Alana what am I gonna do. This isn’t suppose to be happening right now. Not n-now." You sniffled out hanging on to your friend tighter.

This was bad..no scratch that...it was terrible timing.

You had just finally broken some ground at work and was finally feeling like your contributions were being used. Austin was riding the high of Elvis and had also just finished filming Dune part 2. Not to mention you'd only gotten engaged not even three months ago and hadn't been in the new condo two good months...which you'd been literally going at it like rabbits in.

But still, everything was flowing just the way it needed to flow, and something like this was certain to disrupt it.

" You're gonna have to do what you need to do, babes. No matter what you need to take care of you first above all else." Alana offered.

Looking at her with red eyes you asked, " What would you do? "

Mirroring you back with a face of stone Alana was hesitate to answer because in her mind.. you may not have wanted to hear her true opinion.

She replied, " Honestly."

Taking a breath you nodded.

" Well...."

—-

It'd been almost a month since you'd found that you were pregnant. And it had not been a easy ride. Between the fatigue, constant nauseous feeling, tiredness, and the task of doing your best to hide all signs of the minimal morning sickness from everyone.

You were exhausted.

But still the only two souls that knew were you and Alana.

And as much as you wanted to tell Austin and everyone else...you weren't ready.

Immediately when you stepped inside your home you smelt the delicious scent that carried through the air along with the soft jazz music you could hear from the kitchen. When you entered you were greeted by a enthused Magnus who did his everyday duty of administering your daily dosage of puppy kisses. After you went to the kitchen.

" Hey, mama. Been waiting to see you all day." Austin chirped from his post at the stovetop. He looked to have been making Fajitas and yellow rice, one of your favorite things he made, but your stomach didn't jump at the sight of them like they normally would.

" Hi. That smells good, babe." You responded slowly inching toward the living room faking a smile. Really the closer you got, the more you wanted to gag. It smelled so funny.

" Thanks. I figured it had been a hot minute since I'd made it and I know its a favorite of yours. I thought we might eat this for dinner then maybe we could finish another chapter of the book we got Saturday upstairs."

You just nodded, " Yeah, Aus. That sounds nice. I'm gonna go lie on the couch for a little bit though. Feeling little tired." You informed.

Austin had to hold back the sullen expression that wanted to form and instead replace it with a small smile, usually whenever he cooked you were perched right on a seat at the kitchen island chattering and giggling. But as of recent that hadn't been the case and Austin would be lying if he said it didn't bother him.

" Okay."

From there the two of you had dinner as normal making little small talk here and there. Mostly work talk and little about plans for the summer the two of you had made which now made you said since they might not be feasible with the new information of your...condition.

Post dinner Austin let Magnus out to potty before you both ventured upstairs with the happy hound following where the two of you separately shower and change to then got in bed and Austin took his turn to read.

Feeling actually tired you let him sort of cuddle you with his unoccupied hand on your back while your head rested on his chest and your legs were intertwined.

Seeing that the book was a romance once you'd hit a certain part of the chapter it'd gotten..spicy . And with the two of you particularly in a enclosed space like your bed, it wasn't shocking to you when Austin decided to make a move.

He'd leaned in and grabbed your face pulling yours to his in a sweet kiss. A kiss that you couldn't help but naturally blend into. This was the most action the two of you had seen in a while. He was enjoying being this close to you. He drank in the scent of mango and vanilla that came from you and savored the soft of your skin on his fingertips.

Gaining more traction without breaking the union Austin had managed to to set the book aside on the nightstand while maneuvering to hover over you. Everything was okay until you felt a hand move from caressing the top of your breast down to brush the top of your stomach.

Startled you abruptly pulled away alarming Austin.

" Whoa. Hey you alright? What's the matter? " He questioned searching your face.

Putting on a poker face you nodded, " Yeah I'm fine, babe. Just..do you mind..." You trailed silently gesturing for him to move off.

Obliging instead of just rolling over, Austin got up from the bed standing to look at you. You couldn't quite pin-point what he was thinking, but from his expression it was clear he was bothered.

" Y/N what's going on? Is it me? Have I done something? " He asked.

Shaking your head you scooched off the bed moving to stand, " Of course not, Aus. Why would you think that? It's fine. I'm fine." You said feeling a whoosh of anxiety enter your chest.

" Well I honestly don't know what you want me to think, baby. I mean as of late every time I come near and try to hold you , you move away from like I got the plague. We haven't had a date night in three weeks because you always keep saying you're too tired or busy. Whenever I'm home and I cook dinner for us you don't wanna even sit down and eat with me." Austin poured looking at you with pleading eyes. " It feels..like you don't want me around most days."

Your eyes began to water hearing his outpour of concern and neglect.

“ That’s not true, baby. You know I want you around all the time.” You tried assuring.

You hadn’t meant to get this way. You felt terrible. Like a monster. You'd never meant to make him feel this way.

A bitter laugh left him, “ I can’t tell.”

Looking at you he could see that you felt bad and once your tears began rolling, he felt his eyes begin to feel moist.

" Baby...." He dragged out trying to keep the strain against his voice small, " We're not even making love anymore. The last time you let me touch you was almost a month ago. A-and before that we could barely keep our hands off each other." He painfully pointed out thinking about all the passionate love making the two of had been doing. You used to joke around with him and tease that he had to be part energizer bunny because he never needed a recharge.

But nonetheless it was true.

You'd been avoiding him, and tucking yourself away while you tried to figure out what you were going to do.

Doing little things like wearing loose clothes even to bed when he knew you preferred to be near naked most times. When he'd offer shower with you, you'd always politely decline brushing it off as you were just going to be in and out. You put space between the two of you when you watched shows or ate dinner. Austin had taken note of it all, and while he had been trying to give you some space and be supportive. But he feared he was at the end of his rope.

But still you couldn't find the voice to say anything back to him, and this unfortunately heighten his emotions so bad that he said the unthinkable.

" You know what cut the shit, Y/N! " Austin sighed placing his hands into his face. " Who is he? " Austin accused feeling like you'd just been struck in the chest.

" E-excuse me." You gawked in disbelief at what your fiancée was shockingly insinuating. He had to know better than even letting a passing thought like that enter his mind.

" You heard me. Who is he? " He repeated with more attitude. " Because whatever you're not getting here you gotta be getting somewhere, right? It's Lucas isn't it?" He sourly threw out the name of the name of your friend who'd been helping with your photography classes you'd enrolled in. The same Lucas from the night at Alana's party that had tried to get extra friendly with you. “ You’re fucking him, aren’t you?” The words thrown out like venom.

You felt you heart race prompting you to rest a hand on your chest as you tried to calm yourself down. But no much how much steady breathing you practiced, it wouldn't help stop the tears that began cascading down your face, " Austin...H-how could you even think that. No! There isn't anyone else. Not Lucas..not anyone!" " You choked out in disbelief full on crying now.

Raising his head to look at you he sighed, " Ah hell, Y/N." He mumbled in discontent at seeing you cry the way you were. He hated when you cried. " I don't know what to think at this point! This isn't like us. This isn't like YOU."

You nodded feverishly trying to calm down, " I know...I-I just don't feel like myself, Austin." You half confessed being sure to leave out the major components of why.

" Okay, I understand. And I absolutely hate that your feeling that way. But I can't help you if I don't know what's going on. Can please you tell me what's wrong. I wanna be here and help you. But you're shutting me out. Please." Austin pleaded looking at you intently, all he was asking was for something..really anything that you could tell him to steer him in the right direction. Because right now he felt lost.

Biting your lip to the point of near bloodshed and twiddling your thumbs you contemplated just spilling your guts and telling him right then and there, but the little voice in your head agonizingly sniping at your thoughts wouldn’t allow it.

If you tell him now it becomes real. And there isn't anything guaranteeing that he'll be happy. I mean you told him about your childhood, why would he want someone damaged like you to raise a child with.

Who would want you as a mother?

Feeling like the walls were caving in you just barely spoke, " Austin. I want to....But I can't.... I just can't."

The words had come out.

And now you had to painfully watch as his face fall at your response. It was like you could see a little embers of hope die behind his eyes, and it broke your heart even more to watch as he sniffled up what would have been a stray tear.

When he responded his voice sounded taut, " You know when we first started dating and we played that game with all the questions. And I asked you to describe our relationship in three words. One of the words YOU specifically picked was honest." Austin reminisced reminding you both of the happier time. He took a second to breath until his glossy eyes met yours in a intense lock, " W-when did that change?"

Once he finished, he then proceed to back away from you softly wrenching the bedroom door open, he casted you one more look before closing it behind him. Leaving you to shakily lay yourself down on the bed and wrap yourself in the covers to ensue in a good old fashion sob out.

That night for the first time since the two of you had gotten engaged and moved into the loft you'd sleep alone in your king size bed. You heard when the guest bedroom had opened and closed. This only made you cry more.

You felt cold. And not just because the usual warmth Austin gave off holding you in the night wasn't present, but really because it was as if you were standing in the middle of nowhere with no shelter and no place to turn.

You felt alone.

In the wee hours of the morning while your fought yourself in and out of sleep you'd heard the bedroom slowly creep open. With your back to the room you listened as he moved about the bathroom and the closet in what you knew was him getting ready for the interview line up he had today for some of the precursors for award season.

You so badly wanted to turn around and call out for him. Apologize and explain everything a thousand times over. But still it felt like your body physically wouldn't move.

When he came out the final time, you could hear him come to his side of the bed and put something on the duvet. He sighed before turning around and back out the door closing it softly behind him. The alarm chime could be heard soon after and that's when you knew he was gone.

Slowly pulling yourself up to turn around. You hit the toggle for the lights and looked at the folded note that sat on his pillow.

You'd be laying if you said that your heart didn't fall to your ass. Was he leaving you?

Numbly you grabbed the note bracing yourself to take in it's contents.

Then you read it,

Dear Y/N,

I know that I already told you that I'd be out for most of the day today but I also wanted to let you know that when I get home I'll be retiring to the guest room.

I don't exactly know what's going right now but I just feel like I'm putting in so much effort into this relationship as of recent only to receive half of it back. And as a couple who recently got engaged..this worries me. I understand that you have a tough time opening up about certain things bothering you and that is completely understandable. But just what I don't understand is why your pulling back from opening up to me after all we've been through in two years of progression.

With that being said, for right now I think it'll be good if we just take some space. Hence why I'll be staying in the guestroom for a couple of days. Unless you're ready to talk in some type of honest capacity or there is some type of emergency, I ask that you please respect this boundary for the time being.

I love you, Y/N. And I know we can work at this and overcome whatever is going on.

But I badly need you to try.

I'll still be home in time to make dinner as normal and I'll leave you a plate in the microwave.

All my love always, forever, and beyond,

Austin.

#daysofourlove #austin butler x reader #austin butler #austin butler x black reader #themangowrites #austin butler fic #austin butler imagine #austin butler fanfic #angst

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