summary: you're so in love with james potter but he's a little too good at giving you mixed signals that it might actually ruin you
pairing: james potter x reader
warnings: angst, a little fluff if u squint, and so much longing & yearning. omg so much of it
a/n: i am unfortunately completely obsessed with taylor swift's new album, so everything i'll write in the near future will be based on one of the ttpd songs (yey!) & this one's based on 'down bad.' feel free to send requests if u want pick the next song for me x
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"So he just said no?" Mary all but hisses. Marlene shushes her, glancing around the classroom before leaning down from where she's sitting on your desk.
"Are you sure it didn't mean something else?" She rests her hand on yours. "Maybe it was just a misunderstanding. He wouldn't…he just wouldn't, right?" You smile weakly at her, then shake your head. She squeezes your hand.
"The note was pretty clear," you say with a soft sigh. The sentence rolls off your tongue with unhidden bitterness. "Sorry, can't. Need to catch up on some assignments."
You would show it to them, so they could see for themselves and maybe divert their sympathetic gazes from you. But you had set it on fire right after reading it, just like the other two notes friendly rejecting you. You still aren't sure why you did it. After all, you did just tell Mary and Marlene that you're fine. At least you will be. You should not be this devastated over some guy.
Even if that guy is James Potter.
James who is now strolling into the room with his mates, looking as invincible and full of life as he always has and always will.
Quickly, you force a smile at the girls and pull out the chair next to you. Marlene, bless her, gets the hint and lightly shoves Mary's shoulder to have her take the seat. You're going through your book bag, pulling out your inkwell when four bodies make their way past your desk.
"Ladies," comes Sirius cheerfully loud voice as he bows at the waist because, of course, he does. Peter and Remus aren't as dramatic with their greetings. The latter, however, does take the time to slow down in front of you until you look up and return his kind smile. Belatedly, you realise perhaps you shouldn't have done that. You lock eyes with James, who's right behind him.
He sends you an easy smile and a wink. Like he's letting you in on another one of his rare secrets. You're not sure if you're smiling back, but it's almost a given that you are.
He takes his seat behind you, laughing blithely at a joke Pete just told, and it's all so painfully charming that you want to die. You fear he will always make you feel like this. Like you're somehow the chosen one. It's such a sickening feeling, you can't help but whip around and look at Mary, pleadingly. Though, you're not sure what you're pleading for anymore.
She shoots you another unbearably sympathetic smile, looking like she's close to cooing at you. You sigh, hiding your face in the crook of your arms.
You can't help but think how easy it would be to just cry right here. It's embarrassing to admit, but you've done it plenty of times over the weekend after you had seen James out at Hogsmeade with the others. Miserably, you had realised that he was, in fact, not too busy working on his assignments. He just didn't want to spend time with you.
You almost let out a sob.
A hand rubs your back and you know it can only be Mary, but you let yourself believe that it's the universe consoling you, as if to say there, there because there's nothing fair about this and she knows it, but there's nothing she can do it about now, can she?
History of Magic passes in a blur. Before you know it, you're in the library, pouring all of yourself into an essay that you normally couldn't have cared less for. But you're willing to do whatever it takes to keep yourself busy. You know your thoughts will stray the moment you're lying quietly in bed anyway, awaiting another sleepless night.
You finish the sentence and look up, satisfied with your work. Apparently it's been a while since you've torn your gaze away from the parchment before you, seeing how stiff your neck is. You knead at the uncomfortable knot in your shoulder while looking around the library. It's relatively full today with every other seat being taken.
Which makes it all the more irritating when your gaze snatches on a figure sat at the other table right across from you. He's not even looking up, head bent over a book, but you would recognise that mop of unruly dark curls anywhere. James must've seen you when he came in, but that might have just been your hopeful self speaking.
Begrudgingly, you resume your writing and it takes everything in you not to look up every few minutes. To glimpse the slight furrow in his brows and the small pout of his lips as he's carefully reading every paragraph. You know he's likely looking for something to prepare for a prank. Normally, you would simply go over and ask him what he's up to. You know he'd happily tell you. But you're glad to have at least a little bit of pride and dignity left that keeps you rooted in your spot.
Seemingly not enough though since all you can think about is that there's no way he doesn't know that you're right there. It really does make you want to bang your head against the table. Maybe that would finally catch James' attention.
Pathetically, you glance at him only to notice that he's packing his things to leave. The tip of your feather goes back to the parchment so fast, it almost pierces it. You haven't got a clue what you're writing, too busy tracking James' movements from the corner of your eyes.
You watch him stand up, walking down the length of his table towards the door down the hall on his right. Then he stops. You hold your breath. James seemingly hesitates before fixing the strap of his bag on his shoulder. He turns left and walks towards you. You're staring at your hand as it writes illegible words, completely out of your control, when you feel a tap on your shoulder.
"Hey," James whispers when you look up, giving you a familiar grin and small wave. It's an innocent gesture, sweet, but there's almost something hostile about this encounter. Like you have no choice but to let him occupy every single one of your senses. You stare up at him, a matching smile sweeping over your lips before you can think better of it.
That's when you notice the scarf he's wearing and its frizzled ends. It's yours. You know it is.
Did he not give it back to you after one of your nights out together on the stands? After you had flown on your brooms, so close to the sea of stars that you could've dipped your fingertips in them? You could almost hear the echoes of your windblown laughters as the memory pushes itself into the foreground of your mind.
James is sitting still, rosy-cheeked, watching you with curious eyes while you babble on about the Leo constellation. He had just told you that you could do whatever you want to him—another quite maddening thing to casually say to someone—and now he's apparently keen on staying true to his word by letting you wrap your scarf around his neck.
It took some convincing before he'd finally accepted it from you. You promised that you wouldn't be cold with your high collared sweater, but James only gave in when you had accepted his wool hat in exchange.
He had carefully put it on you, smoothing down your hair and pulling out some loose strands to frame your face, mumbling something about how much lovelier his hat looked on you than on him. You told yourself that he surely must've known what it did to you when his knuckles brushed your cheeks. Right? Surely.
James pokes your side, chuckling, as if he sensed that your mind was drifting elsewhere. He cracks another joke, saying that if you were the one to teach him Astronomy, he might actually pay attention in class. He says it like it's a deal and you feel inclined to do whatever it takes to hold up your side of the bargain.
You laugh helplessly, feeling drunk on a little bit of everything; the stars above, James' gentle laughter, the familiar smell of broom wax and crisp winter air. This must be cosmic love, you think to yourself. Your breath clouds in front of you, becoming one with his. All the while, you're too aware of James' shoulder bumping into you, his leg pressed against yours. There's no one out here but you two.
You have all the room in the world, but James chose to sit this close to you. Probably close enough for him to hear your heart pounding. Did he do it for a reason? You'd love to know.
"You don't need me to pay attention in Astronomy," you find yourself saying in response, something daring laced in the drawl of your voice. His eyes flash, bright and a bit wild. It's the same look he gets after you challenge him to a race on your brooms. His grin grows wide, carefree, and oh so lovely.
"Please." His face comes impossibly closer and you lean in without another thought, eager to take whatever it is James will give you. You feel his breath on your lips.
"I will always need you, Y/N."
Somehow he makes it sound genuine.
Then he winks and leaves you a horrid, forsaken mess. Somehow he makes that feel like a nice gesture too.
Incredulously, you stare at him as he leans back, elbows resting on the seats behind him. James Potter, you think weakly, what are you doing to me? Not for the first time you ponder what you would do if you can't have him. You almost double over from the striking pain in your chest.
Then he points out another constellation and you nearly forget all about yourself. He's good at that. Never ceasing to show you that the world is bigger than the two of you. Making you forget and remember that you might be in love. Because what if you were in love?
James cups the back of his neck, then points towards the door of the library, almost shyly letting you know that he's leaving. You nod slowly, still dazed. A small smile crosses his lips before you watch him round the corner, his back disappearing from your sight.
You blink, letting out a ragged breath. You feel like you got the wind knocked out of you. Like you just lost your twin. Someone who knows you like no one else ever will. Someone who might just be your better half. Someone who sometimes makes you feel like they want nothing to do with you.
It's ridiculous, you think bleakly to yourself, you're so down bad.
And James Potter makes it feel like a curse and a blessing.
dialogue 7 trope 8 with tchouameni pls. so happy that ppl are finally writing for him 🥹❤️
- "ooohh you wanna kiss me sooo bad."
- Bodyguard au
happy to write for him! he needs more love enjooyyyy
word count - 800+
watch it - flirty tch and weapon mentioned like once enjoyy
You know you're not a very stereotypical bodyguard. Shorter than most, no rippling muscles that tear shirts apart. It does give you the advantage of surprise. No one expects you. Even more so for the man you've been tasked to protect.
You know they hired you specifically to blend in and so you do. Still keeping close but you look like you could be anything from a part of the crowd to a friend and whatever more. You've seen yourself on a few gossip pages and on news articles here and there.
They have yet to put the pieces together and you want to keep it that way. You have a job to do and a man to protect. A man that for the life of you you can't understand.
He's an enigma on a good day. Aurélien keeps a curious eye on you, eager to watch you. But yet so hesitant.
He doesn't talk to you all that much, but when he does he manages to squeeze playful words in between each sentence. Always catching you off guard. He goes from being honed in and focused to letting his shoulders loose in a laugh.
Today seems like no exception. You wait in the wings backstage of an event. It's just a rehearsal for the actual thing yet you're here. Its empty save for stage screws running about with wires and microphones tangled on the floor.
You stand arms crossed a few feet away from where Aurélien is being fitted with different wires and what not. He speaks, arms waving lazily and nodding along to whatever his agent is saying. You haven't talked to him today yet.
He spots you soon enough, giving you a wave while you respond with a curt nod. He gets shown to where you stand, told to “hang out” here for a second while they adjust the lighting.
“Didn't know they dragged you here too?” he says, hands resting inside the pockets of his jacket.
“I have a job to do.” you shrug.
“Does it even get boring? Being around the same person all the time. I know I get tired.”
Your expression remains neutral, though a spark of amusement flickers in your eyes. "Perhaps," you hum, "But that doesn't change the fact that I'm here to protect you, whether you like it or not."
He grins, gaze lingering on you for a moment longer before turning back to watch the lights cycle through the different settings. "Well, in that case, I suppose I'll just have to make your job as interesting as possible," he says with a lazy shrug.
You roll your eyes, but cant help the small smile that tugs at your lips. "I have no doubt you will," you reply dryly
Aurélien gives you a playful smirk before leaning in slightly, his voice dropping to a teasing whisper. "You know," he says, amusement dancing in his eyes, "sometimes I wonder if all this protection is just an excuse to be close to me."
You raise an eyebrow, unimpressed by his attempt at flirting. "Don't flatter yourself," you retort, though you can't stop the smile that seems between your words. He's bold today.
Leave it to Aurélien to find a way to wiggle into your personal space and under your skin with his words so early in the day. And you have so many more hours left with him. How thrilling.
He chuckles softly, leaning even closer until his breath brushes against your ear. "Oh, come on," he murmurs, "we both know deep down, you wanna kiss me sooo bad."
You can't help but laugh, shaking your head at his shameless antics. "You wish," you reply, giving him a playful shove before straightening up, feeling the waistband of your pants for your weapon. Old habits die hard you suppose.
Aurélien grins, the playful glint returning to his eyes as he steps back, resuming his role in the rehearsal.
You don't know what game he really plays. If his words really hold any meaning. If you should listen. So you choose the safe route and brush them off and try to do your job. Even if he insists on making it near impossible.
He sends you knowing looks from the other side of the backstage area. Ones you know would easily strike up talk. But you can't talk your eyes off him. Partly because of your job and partly due to him being so- what's the word- dazzling.
You do want to kiss him, but he doesn't need to know that. Not now at least.
For now you watch him do his thing while you try to do your job and push away his voice from ringing in your ears over and over.
I did the thing again. If you missed the livestream but want to know what happened, I wrote down some notes again. (Spoiler warning, obviously, as I will mention who won the death match)
. The Nightmare Time theme is so fucking good
. Xander murdered Grace last death match and won
. James and Matt like wrestling (not each other - the sport)
. BOTTLE IMPS!!!!!!!!!!!!
. WORKIN BOYS GETS RELEASED ON YOUTUBE AT 425,000
. Lmao the backing music is Jane's A Car
. We are the Lords In Black
. HARMONY AND BARRY!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE HARMONY SO MUCH
. Ted and Hidgens are a duo lmaoooooo
. Melissa and w o m a n
. Mariah really loved w o m a n
. CCRP set up a water filtration system that pissed people off
. USE IT OR LOSE IT
. Harmony and Barry are just so annoying that Paul and Emma want to fight them
. Paul is the first to die
. Coffee makes Barry stronger
. Jon is the only one who thought Paulkins would win
. Rip Harmony :(
. Paul throws spare change at Harmony and Barry, summoning the Homeless Man, who wins the fight for them
. Bill and Alice get an easybake oven stolen from them by Sherman
. Love Vs Crazy
. Frank and Bill get mistaken for eachother mid-fight
. Sherman is vicious
. Frank wants Sherman to die
. Alice eats Sherman's soul and becomes a little kid again
. Ruth has a crush on Hidgens
. Ted and Hidgens have a dead body???????
. The dead body is a Frankenstein amalgamation of all the Workin Boys
. Frankenruth?????????
. RICHIE HAS THE POWER OF GOD AND ANIME ON HIS SIDE
. Ted and Hidgens win with help from the Workin Boy
. “w o m a n is here!”
“I'm fucking here, bitches”
. Shapiro + Bailey are looking for Roman
. Dog…
. Oh no
. Roman is the dog.
. Melissa and w o m a n die
. MISS HOLLOWEEN!!!!!!!
. Bottle Imps was supposed to be between Forever and Always and Time Bastard
. Bill meets the founder of CCRP
. CHARLES IS IN IT
. CHARLES FOUNDED CCRP
. HARVARD LAW SCHOOL COMMUNITY ORGANISING PRICK?!?!?!?!?
. HOWIE?!?!?!?!?!?
. Bill's been at CCRP 13 years
. Coven’s Communication Research and Power
. Charles wants… ALL the money
. If it's actually Billted oh my god…
. Jane didn't die, but their dog did so she divorced him
. THEY'VE COVERED THE PROTESTS LIVE AT THE HATCHETFIELD KENNEL
. THE PROBLEMATIC PUPPY BIT SOLOMON LAUTER
. DONNA WANTS THE DOG TO DIE
. THE DOG IS IN THE CAR
. THE DOG CAR RUNS OVER DAN AND DONNA
. GOT MY PAW ON THE GAS
. Everyone is cheating on each other
. Ethan used to bully Pete
. Pete and Steph don't tip
. Lex flips out
. Lex suddenly develops a gluten intolerance????
. Jason and Kyle save Steph and Pete
. Max breaks into Camp Idontwannabang, Grace reads him Bible stories, they're about to kiss, then Boy Jerry and Girl Jeri burst in to kill them
. Grace is so Jesus loving that Lumberaxe kills the Jerries
. MISS HOLLOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN
. Excorcism???
. “Christ’s in hell with your mother”
Riley
. Miss Holloway has a witch hat!!!!!
. Evil mask??
. Riley's in hell smh
. “You basic bitch”
. MISS HOLLOWAY THROWS HERSELF INTO A WOOD CHIPPER
. Joey is Ted again
. YELLOW JACKET
. Alice and Bill get pissed about Paulkins trash talking Mamma Mia
. Joey: “This is the future the libs want”
. General MacNamara drops in from a helicopter and shoots Bill and Alice in the head
. James will murder Paul and Emma himself if they survive again
. Ted accidentally confesses to murdering Ruth and Richie
. Joey: “Here's the thing, ACAB”
. Thrash murders Shapiro for being a cop lmaooooooo
. Sam’s a dick to Tim at Pizza Pete’s
. Hannah straight up murders Charlotte and Sam
. I have to go to bed :( (Stopped right before Holyghost v Lautity)
. I'm baaaa-aaaaaack! It's the next day, I have pancakes, and I'm just realising I accidentally wrote Lautity instead of Lautski… I just love them too much
. I haven't checked Tumblr cause I don't want to be spoiled for who wins
. OH SHIT WORKIN BOYS IS ON YOUTUBE
. I'm back on the livestream, I'll check that out later
. They're at Perky's Buds, Grace has dragged Max there for a protest, Steph dragged Pete there for weed
. Grace wants Steph to go to heaven
. Five minutes for A THOUSAND DOLLARS?!?!?!?
. THEY DID IT IN ONE MINUTE
. Joey: “You horny little fucks”
. Max just murders Steph and Pete
. Max wouldn't want to hit a girl, Ziggs comes out, fails to land a single shot on them, but attracts the nighthawks which peck out Steph and Pete’s eyes
. Nicole Rodriguez is so fucking talented damnnnnnnnn, also I love Cool As I Think I Am (Reprise)
. This song will always destroy me emotionally :(
. Why is Joey doing a British accent lmaoooo
. This isn't the next scene, but is after it chronologically
. BRENDA!!!!!!!!!!
. BRENDA WORKS AT MISS RETRO'S
. If only it was a real werewolf… Wayward Guide, anyone?
. “Shit-eating grin” is my favourite Americanism. It's so funny I love it
. I kinda love Tucker
. More skidoos???
. Kyle's in college?????????????? Damn
. Even Stacy's in college
. Miss Holloway: “Cause the 80’s were bitchin’ ”
. Oh nooooo :(
. Miss Holloway: “The intranet”
. Oh god
. Oh shit
. Oh fuck
. Even though I knew this was going to happen I'm still devastated
. Oh god :((((((((
. God we need NMT3
. Joey: “Is this a bad time to announce Curt and Kim are getting divorced?”
. VIRGINITY ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
. Tedgens are stealing from CCRP, Paulkins are about to go on a date, they find them, and Hidgens goes all murder-crazy
. Corey: “Some of us are wrong and many of us are right”
. Joey: “Jon, Ted is gooning all over this office”
. Jon: “Great job everybody, all the food is gonna be poisoned next week”
. Goddamnit I just got spoiled for it :(
. Tedgens manage to find the Bastard's Box and trap Paul and Emma in it
. Hidgens hears Workin Boys coming from the box, but Ted stops him from touching it
. Tom and Becky want to buy the Waylon Place, and find Grace and Max burying Pete and Steph
. Tom coaches the Hatchetfield Nighthawks??????????
. Gen Z Vs Millennials
. Someone pulled $800 from the Kickstarter :(
. Will arrived literally as soon as Max died
. Grace and Max are ghosts now
. Meg Lloyd is also insanely talented
. Will loves Tom and Becky
. Sauce Saturday
. RUN AWAY WITH MEEEEEEE
. They're in the Starlight theatre, Wilbur is there for some reason
. “He was driving the car that killed your dog”
. NOOOOOOO JENNY
. LAUREN!!!!!
. Wilbur just straight up cheats so Tedgens win
. OHHHHHHH TED VS HIDGENS
. Ted always dies though :/
. A girl Miss Holloway saved has died
. MISS HOLLOWAY IS RENEGOTIATING HER DEAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
. Lore….
. Miss Holloway chops off her toes?????
. AND DIPS THEM IN CHOCOLATE?????????
. AN OLD POP STAR THE WORLD’S FORGOTTEN
. That's what that tune is called?
. OH MY GOD THE LORDS
. I NEED TO DRAW THIS
. Why do the Lords eat toes
. Blinky has a mouth???????
. Nibbly lmao
. Mariah: “Lauren, you're muted, baby”
Lauren (muted): “FUCK”
. Blinky, my love
. This is so fanfiction coded I love it
. Tinky likes Miss Holloway????? Duke really was right about everyone being in love with her
. I WANNA DANCE WITH SOMEBODY
. Lmao Tinky
. Double calculators, and an abacus????
. Blinky (covering his ears): That's a bad word!
. BLINKY HAS EARS??????
. HER NAME
. BE A PALLY WAL
. OH MY GOD MISS HOLLOWAY
. Ted wins!!!
. THEY'RE GONNA DO DND
. Well.
. Nightmare Time Cover!!!!!!!! Needy Beast, my love
S3 episode 4 (And The Children Shall Lead) I'll explain what happened to episode 3 under the cut of this post.
Start here:
- The three of them beaming down together is a good start
- Guys they're not dead!… they’re just sleepy
- Kirk is not amused
- As much as I want to believe Kirk would be good with children, it’s proven (canonically) he is not
- “I am getting a feeling of anxiety in this place.” This reminds me of a good omens line. If ya know, ya know.
- I love nurse chapel. The medical department being good with kids is heartwarming
- Is this a Peter Pan situation? (edit: nope)
- So why are the kids chanting and summoning an entity? Let's not have to call the exorcist.
- “Have Dr. McCoy report to my quarters.” Yeah…?
- We get to watch Sulu press buttons and turn dials :)
- Uhura’s double take
- “You’re losing control of yourself, sir.” “Not yet.” Scotty then proceeds to fight two guys and get knocked out
- “The enemy from within!” Previous episode mention
- That’s horrific. The children controlling their parents caused them to die on Triacus. Star Trek can write some pretty fucked up shit actually. But it doesn't deal with the consequences.
- McCoy’s opinion is outnumbered two to one again so he just storms out
- They just beamed those two redshirts out into space…
- “Friendly angel come to me.”
youtube
- Kirk and Spock share a look like, ‘what the fuck is going on’
- Spell that makes you see knives in space
- Poor Uhura. No one wants to see their own death, but amazing acting
- “Captain, why are we bothering starfleet?” Spock too? Kirk you gotta go find McCoy, maybe he’ll be talking some sense
- So why haven’t I seen anyone talk about this?
- “My Vulcan friend.” Yep Kirk. Reassert your friendship.
- Spock grabs Kirk’s arm to reassure him
- WOAH! He jumped to killing kids way too fast (worst case scenario stun or hypo them! Jesus)
- Kirk has had to remind himself that it’s not okay to punch a child a few too many times in this episode (I can see it in his eyes)
- He’s playing the video of all the kids playing with their parents on Triacus and they’re smiling but I’m expecting Kirk to just say ‘and now.. your parents are dead.’ - omg they really did just switch suddenly to their DEAD PARENTS. No remorse.
- This episode is fucking devastating
- Bones is going to come back from wherever the fuck he is and just, 'Jim, I specifically told you not to traumatize these kids.'
- The ‘angel’ dying is fucking horrifying
Now everything’s fine and dandy. Not like the entire bridge just went through major mind fuck of an ordeal or anything
Masterpost
Episode written by Edward J. Lakso
So I didn't actually watch episode 3, I watched around 15 minutes and then said, 'I really just don’t want to watch this episode. So I won’t.'
Only thoughts from this episode that I'm gonna mention are:
- The reason that they didn't let Spock point out the pine trees is because he would have said their scientific name
- “Typical human reaction to an idyllic natural setting.” McCoy says this with so little bite towards Spock, like he’s actually having a conversation with him and explaining what it is. AHH
- They could have easily left McCoy on the planet to search for Jim while Spock goes to divert the asteroid. If being alone was the issue they could've beamed down a security officer/team
Other than that... there's nothing. Sorry Margaret Armen.
Thinking once again somehow of how important it is to me that when Wei Wuxian came back to life in Mo Xuanyu's body, the only two people who recognised him were Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng.
Nothing is more proof of the fact that Jiang Cheng cared deeply for Wei Wuxian. Yes, he was hurt and there was anger but the fact that he held onto his rage and grief for years doesn't read to me as, "he hated Wei Wuxian so much he never forgave him for anything." Rather it reads as anger being the manifestation of Jiang Cheng's grief around losing his brother and closest confidant.
One of the best Voyager scenes to indicate Tuvok & Neelix's dynamic and how I think Tuvok is just as if not more 'annoying'(positive) than Neelix is when Neelix pours Tuvok a fresh squeezed glass of a fruit juice blend and Tuvok's like (paraphrased) "I don't want to drink this." and Neelix is like "Can you please try it?" and Tuvok's like "I don't want to, you're really bad at this sort of thing. It's going to taste bad." and Neelix says that Ensign XYZ said she LOVED it, she even had a second glass! And Tuvok says Ensign XYZ could drink poison without a second thought and Neelix is like "Tuvok could you please just TRY it? Just try a little SIP of it PLEASE??" and Tuvok sighs and rolls his eyes and sniffs it before taking a sip and it turns out he loves it. Turns out it tasted good actually. And then after all that Neelix tries to talk to him over eggs (which he's again cooking fresh for him) and Tuvok tells him he doesn't wanna hear "the life history of his breakfast." Absolutely insufferable this man I would have burned his eggs on PURPOSE!!!!
I really wish yamato had gone with luffy and I love that he asked to be considered a crewmate anyway and that luffy told him he'd always have a place on the sunny so I a hundred percent consider him a mugiwara but in my ideal one piece where the war ended differently and ace is still alive yamato is his. like obviously ace is dead and he hadn't been a captain for a while before then anyway, but in my ideal one piece yamato belongs to him. he's a spades. he's ace's crewmate first and foremost.
Y’all are being subjected to my Sims 2 tests, so there
The other set of Vargases came over for a visit and Scriabin picked up Shmee and started talking to Scriabin through him. Very normal, very usual
I downloaded some circle-glasses recolours and hghghh they look so good! Closer every day to his final details! Getting ever closer!
Edgar too! I made him a custom hair with a lighter undercut - I’m mostly happy with it, probably could’ve shifted it a shade closer to his skintone but the texturing was weird no matter what :P And his stripey shirt! I wish Body Shop didn’t have that hands-on-hips pose lol, it looks so much better in-game, but that’s all the better :)
I got some new clothes for Todd as well! As soon as I saw this ‘fit I was like “Oh that’s 100% Todd there he is.” Scriadad hug ♥ So cute
Foot-dancing together stopp it’s so cute!!
The way he looks at them stoppp <3 <3 They kept doing this right up til they left for home haha, Todd’s giggles are the cutest
Used SimPE to save him to the Body Shop, I now have infinite copies of The Boyyyy ♪
Moved him in with his “parents” as just shadow people basically, they’re not gonna matter in a bit as long as I remember how to get the Social Worker/Adoption process to work properly. Get her Todd!!
Wanna play? :D
Menacing :(
Look, Todd, your new dads are here! Initially I wasn’t sure who I wanted to adopt him, got lots of options; the first passes, the married couple with their own Todd, Johnny?? He definitely doesn’t have the facilities for a child lol
But these are the ones that showed up on their own, so the married Vargases are the winners!
Scriabin cares more about him than his actual parents ;; A stranger off the street shows him more care! Not that it’s a high watermark
Look at him being a good dad!
Weh, he just wants friends ;; Poor baby
Best timeline, thank you
While we wait for CPS, let’s get some other interactions in! Nny is mean so he tended to prank the other two with a nose flick - mostly Edgar lol ♪ Now kiss
“Oh please don’t break all my bones~ :3” I love Todd looking up at them haha <3
Pffft, I think he was talking about the other Scriabin and just how attractive he is. Classic Scriabin. Alternatively, also funny to imagine him bragging himself up about how he’s just so handsome that Edgar can’t help but love him hahaha ♪
Allow me to tickle you with my KNIFE! >:D
Get a load of this guy lol
He ended up passing out at one point - I forgot which motives make CPS show up >.> - and completely 0%’d his comfort, but for some reason stargazing increased it?? It’s the same ground wh
Is two not enough to satisfy your butterfly bloodlust child?? He ended up with three, I had him release them before he was picked up by the Social Worker - success!
He rolled a new Want as soon as Todd was taken away - “Wants to see Ghost of Todd” Woah, dark! :0
And here he is on the married Vargases’ lot!! Success!! I did it right!! Heck yeah! :D Unfortunately they were uh, indisposed at the time. Good job guys pft
Soulmates AU in which when your soulmate is in a situation that can result in their death you get to see through their eyes. Like, I don't know how to explain this- it kind of flashes between what you see and what your soulmate sees. You know those edits where there's a scene going on and there's another one faded in the background happening at the same time? Similar to that. The idea is that you get to see what your soulmate sees too, on top of what you're seeing.
Now, this AU but JeanMarco. With Marco asking the others where's Jean, just for him to start seeing a corpse right in front of his eyes not even a second after asking. Seeing through Jean's eyes as he's trying to get hold of that gear and stuff. And once Jean's safe, once it clicks that you know his best friend is his soulmate Marco can't wait for them to graduate so he can you know tell him that.
Then, you know. That happens. And Jean is so fucking confused because he keeps seeing Annie crying, looking down on him. Only when Annie starts getting off the gear, when his soulmate starts moving around trying to get away he starts panicking, starts moving around faster than before. And maybe he's too late. Or maybe he shows up in time and kills the titan. I don't know. That's not where I'm trying to get, but to the second option AKA Marco pulling an UNO reverse on Annie because he's a smart sneaky bastard like that and being like 'Hey you can't kill me, my soulmate will know it was you' which makes her stop trying to take off his gear. Reiner keeps telling her to do it, Bertholdt keeps yelling about that titan coming closer, but Annie... she has seen things, at some point. Flashes of moments that weren't hers, happening right in Trost- right in that moment. And she didn't give them too much thought until that moment, until it got confirmed that it has nothing to do with her titan powers.
'What do you mean by that?' she asks, because she needs to know more. Because she wants to know more. And Marco starts explaining how it works. Tells them that he has found his soulmate, that they will put all the blame on them for his death. Reiner doesn't believe him, keeps insisting that he's playing them around - he, and anyone born and raised on Marley, has never heard of something like that before, it doesn't exist - but Annie tells him to shut up and to let Marco go. Cue to the plot of any fic in which Marco doesn't straight up die after finding up their secret.
Anyway I don't know man, just,,, We need more soulmate aus for JeanMarco. That's an order.
starting to realise that damn maybe there really is just something fundamentally wrong with me
I have more dumb shit to say about it but you can only have 30 tags?? that's some fucking bullshit. anyway tl;dr: fictional characters not real, I'm depressed about it, I'm a mess my life's a mess everything sucks, I'm crying, life sucks. I've got issues.
What is your opinion on chau x kim? I'm not a shipper of it myself but I heard it was a proship since knives is 17 but also I saw she was 18 in the comic so I'm not sure where to stand on it honestly. But I'd like to hear your opinion about it !! Sorry if this is a bit of a random ask (ーー;
You're completely fine!! Do not even worry about it.
So, yeah- When Scott first meets Knives, and I'm not entirely sure how much time passes between then and when they start dating, it was *literally* her seventeenth birthday, as I am reminding myself reading back over these panels presently. And then at the start of book six, the first time we see (real, non-dream,) Knives, she has apparently been eighteen for a week!
Now, I'm going to preface with a little something before I go further into this: I am totally fine answering this ask and others like it I think! but, I will note, I do get like a (not fun) physical sensation in my chest- partly anxiety (lol) but also something else I think- thinking about them like 95% of the time- it's gotta be like. Handled The Right Way, if that makes sense. Let's get into it.
So, first off, I'm just gonna re: some of the stuff relative to this I've posted here before- both nonrp and rp, since I use RP to develop my read on Kim and shed some light on how I see things I guess!
These clips come from this ask (and reblog) here!
This rp ask here, which is simply too difficult for me to get in a good screenshot I feel, so I recommend just checking it and the tags for it out- I will share my Bonus Commentary reply though:
This ask as well! Tags less pressing, but still provide a little insight.
And this is probably a dumb inclusion if I really want to make a pseudonym to post fics under, but. I have posted my (very early) thoughts on the SPTO sparks scene to AO3 before, so- (and before going into this- I did remember that Julie and Gideon have that sparks scene after the fact!)
And here's the Barely Anything Lines hinting at the ship that I had in that fic that I used to justify that blurb, while we're here:
I think I've gone over my feelings a little bit in the discord as well, and there might even be more rp stuff relative to it, but I'm not going to go back and get any of that honestly- at least, not right now, or unless requested, since I don't really feel like it's necessary, if it does exist. This gives a pretty good glimpse in I'd say- especially that second to last one there.
So. Yeah.
Used to ship it; have expanded my horizons since then. I don't really want to knock it because like... for some people this is a legitimate life experience for them- one that might have even turned out well, miraculously. And there also a lot of minors in this fandom evidently, so like, any other baby gays out there just wanting to Project for a minute? I feel that. Sincerely I do. It's not the wisest choice but better to read fanfiction about it than go out and actually make out with a 23 year old, Gods forbid. (Genuinely felt sick thinking about that; fucking gross. Any minors out there: Please Make Good Choices. Look out for yourselves. Begging you. There are too many freaks in this world- I promise you whoever you're thinking of probably isn't the magical exception.)
But there are definitely things to consider about them that are very interesting to me, still, so like. I'm in this weird state of conflict; I don't know if it's just me being like "it happened, you can't escape it" or having been desensitized/some sort of Brainwashed by how many times I had to use Knives in the game to quick heal- maybe something else but I just don't feel like flaying myself open like that unprompted for just anyone- but like. Oh man.
Sorry, gathering/writing this that feeling like went away but came circling back for this last bit, it seems. Which makes sense I guess. I feel like I'm setting myself up for a Pyre right now eugh shfsgkjfhjg
I dunno. I'm not gonna lie and pretend like I know it to be some big formative ship for me in my early teen years, but it was kind of important in finally coming around to realizing how queer I was, I think. My memories of the time are fuzzy, but it would have been one of the things- there were likely larger ones, my current obsession could be recoloring my past here so I'm trying to acknowledge that.
But there is like. A dynamic that is posited by them that is also one I'm a really big sucker for. More so now than I was then, so I find myself grinding my teeth about that a fair bit at times.
I definitely still really like it as something unrequited no matter what I think; I like the idea of Knives having a really big crush on Kim, genuinely. I think it's cute and funny as hell for how uncomfortable it would make Kim, who's just trying so hard not to be a fucking creep while this ray of sunshine hangs off her- something she absolutely does not deserve (in her eyes.)
I'm obviously more partial to Kim resisting any advances made at her, but I can understand so, so badly why someone might be attracted to the idea of Knives managing to thaw some of Kim's frigidity with that. Ugh.
If they work for me, I think they'd have to work for me after Knives is gone at college for a bit. Kim would need to know Knives for longer than she knew her as a minor- and they'd have to be FRIENDS in that time, quite strictly. Kim would need to not feel (intensely, because frankly, she would unavoidably feel this way at least a little no matter what,) like she was a fucking groomer going into it, basically. I don't know what I think past that.
You know, I'll put my feelings like this: with the exception of a fic I saw recommended to someone that intrigued me, I have managed to resist reading any/many fics featuring them, despite it being a large majority of the wlw Kim fics that exist, and also kinda just Kim fics generally. It's kind of Insane, especially considering how much Kimona SCREAM at you from the pages of the comic itself- but I digress....
I've been working on this for like over an hour now I think so I really should cut myself off. I am like,, too hungry and mildly stoned to be rambling off about this maybe. If you want more concise/specific thoughts, I recommend prompting! I can try and channel the responses easier with a bit more direction, maybe?
...
actually another thing real quick- I like. Do not know that I could ever feel comfortable, truly, consuming content for them, not knowing if the OP has good intentions. I just Do Not trust people, largely, so that's just like. A little thing. Idk. "Death to the author" or whatever but I am still allowed to feel personally uncomfortable ya know! I don't want them taking my silent observation as like,, passive acceptance in the event that they were. Idk if that makes sense, I need to go eat already, I'm hitting post before i drag this out to TWO hours
This is "The Doctor", a resident of the nightmare realm, who has been there long enough to have been almost completely corrupted. His face is normally just a pitch black void hole but sometimes you can see eyes and/or teeth in there
He wants to help people, but he's almost completely lost his mind, and can sometimes act a bit... Feral.
Surprisingly, the nightmare realm's usual effect of making people lose every memory of their life before they ended up here, hasn't managed to take away his medical knowledge. He's still very smart, despite everything.
Unfortunately he seems to scare off most people who he would otherwise have helped...