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autisticlancemcclain · 3 months

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What’s your most hated fandom characterization for each of the main 7?

hoo boy am i glad you asked. although i’m gonna be real, my issue is less with fandom characterization, because you do you i don’t give a shit, and more with how people go batty if you personally are not a fan of fanon characterizations.

like, lemme be obvious and talk about my biggest example. i am a brown eyed lance truther. we know this. the amount of weirdo comments, weirdo DMs, and weirdo asks i get is atrocious. i post a lot of them bc they’re so stupid they’re funny but the amount of people per week that tell me to kill myself is lowkey wild. the amount of people that love to say some variation of “i liked your fic but you ruined it by making lances eyes brown! his eyes are blue!” and i’ve checked other brown eyed truther’s fics — either they delete their comments better than me, or they do not get the same thing. idk what the deal is lol.

i will concede to the point that i’m a contrarian and annoying about it, but a list of the following non-fanon headcanons/characterizations i hold that have been commented on in some derisive way:

- bitchy hunk (lol)

- non “cinnamon roll too pure and baby and good for this world” hunk*

- allura is a good character (🤡)**

- allura is a sweetheart

- allura is not a drill sergeant

- kuron was a good iteration of shiro

- red paladin lance/black paladin keith/blue paladin allura

- retired shiro

- pidge is not cruel

- pidge is not an infant and can handle things a regular 14-15 year old can handle

- small details are irrelevant (think lances family, exact prekerb details, etc)

- keith gyeong and lance sanchez

- fucking brown eyed lance. i’m saying it again

- tall keith

- non omega keith***

- readmores

- autistic lance

- adhd keith

- non asshole/cruel keith

- comphetting gay lance****

- shallura

- bi shiro, demi keith, essentially any sexuality headcanon that isn’t mainstream

- hunk who isn’t food obsessed

- that’s about it

*stop infantilising hunk

**the allura hate is ridiculous and largely rooted in anti-Blackness. it should not be a fight to say that she had a reason to feel betrayed by keith’s heritage, that she did not “get in the way” of klance, that her death was stupid and ridiculous, that she is often pushed over in favour of klance (not as in she’s less popular, but that her/her death are used as a plot device to further klance), and that she is as interesting, nuanced, and multifaceted as the rest of them.

***people, inevitably, feminize characters in fandoms (largely because many people in fandom are young women, i know i feminize characters simply bc i’m making them like me and i’m feminine lol), and my issue is that people (in the general sense, not everybody) love to feminize keith and then get really mad if anyone else is feminized. this is not about fem or trans woman keith btw. this is about people omega-ifying him and then losing their MINDS if i don’t share that headcanon.

****i literally only wrote this once and then never again because people lost their minds. but as much as i love bi lance, i think it’s interesting that usually, when we see “boy crazy” or “girl crazy” characters, especially if they have a lot of chemistry or homoerotic tension with a same-gender character, people are like oh ya that’s comphetting. that character is desperately trying to outrun the gay thoughts. but with lance, who was definitely girl crazy and cared more about having a girlfriend than actually dating and falling in love (think “mrs blue lion” — he didn’t give a fuck about who he was marrying, so long that it was a girl), calling him gay will have people saying you’re erasing bisexuality. as if he was not fucking straight in the show. so.

sorry this is so bitter and ranty lol. been in a mood

#and have been wanting to complain about this specifically for months #so thank u for that #longpost #vld headcanons #rant #ask

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royalberryriku · 7 months

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Unfortunately, I am thinking again and am reminded again how heterosexual TERF women continually steal shit from lesbians and try to erase butches because they hate them so goddamn much. ESPECIALLY he/him butches and queer women and non binary dykes. Hell, even bisexual women, non binary people and he/him folks who are dykes in some way or another.

In fact, as a bisexual bigender trans man dyke, this'd be me. For real, we were here before you all decided to be offended by lesbians who dare to even use a strap because that scares you! Or call themselves men! And no not "because of safety reasons" but because we've always done it and still do it regardless. Because it's part of who some of us are. We have loved tits, pussy, straps (plastic or bio) way before you all decided to use lesbian to mean "we hate men". It's the "we fucking love women and wanna kiss women" club. It's not hard, lesbian means we kissy kissy women in a way the hettys don't like.

Because they think only gender roles abiding men can kiss gender roles abiding women and anything that's different is a sin or yucky, that's what offends them! That's why when lesbians are a femme that looks very feminine and womanly and such OR a butch that looks like a man people get pissed. That's why a woman with a beard makes people pissed. That's why a man who has breasts who kisses women makes people pissed. Because it denies all the gender roles that are defied here. It doesn't matter if a woman has a pussy or a dick, because it's already against the damn rules if she kisses girls and no one's gonna care when they call her a sinner like the rest of us.

They don't care that I'm a dude who looks cis, because I act too feminine, yet dress masculine and androgynous, and I have breasts and a pussy and like people with breast and a pussy as well to boot plus I like men and that's all against the bloody rules so I'm a freak of nature them who they want to legislate against. Hell, even in the community (esp among people who refuse to learn what older queers have lived through or anything about our history) being non binary to the point you aren't able to fit cleanly in any single clean label makes you really easy to hate. It doesn't matter that my love of women and my love of men makes me hated as a man who loves men and a woman-like person who likes women, because god forbid I call myself a dyke because my gender relates deeply to being a he/him butch. And the thing is, we've always been around since always but people get pissed when things aren't neat, tidy and easy to digest for their convenience and personal ease. When our existence is actually broad and vague, that makes people puzzled and scared, despite us all being fluid as people. It's our species whole thing to not be consistent or always the same or easy to understand. We're complex. But I digress...

There's just so much to this I could delve into but the biggest thing here is that regardless of what TERFs think, so much of it is borrowed from queers. So much is just stolen shit they rebranded and repurposed but made for hets. So much of feminism was built from queers, hell, from gay men. So much of feminism was built from lesbians and bisexuals and trans people. So much of the terms that TERFs use and the rights they have were built off our backs and now we're the fucking enemy? Lmao okay. Who do you think helped you all fight against abusive cis men? Not cis men saying you all need to join up with their anti trans groups that for sure. It was the gay men who look down on and lesbians you all call predatory and the drag queens who pushed to normalise the idea that femininity isn't just for women but men and, for you all, that it doesn't define a woman. Who stood by you all this entire time? And now we're all expendable, us queers.

And hey, we don't want you in feminist circles either since you've all proven yourselves to be sexist as hell. But I'm still pissed that so much of queer culture and our efforts have been used, borrowed, taken for granted and repeated as if it came from you all when a lot of it came from us. Like, sweetie, no. You all really think heterosexual women built feminism without us? You all think when you say "all men are gross perverts to women" you're not realising you're forgetting the gay men who aren't fucking attracted to women and have been treated like shit for being attracted to men? You think banning drag queens are some sort of thanks to all the times they've pushed against the idea that dresses must only be worn by women and pants can only be worn by men? Are you all fucking kidding me?

Everything about TERFs are borrowed and stolen, but hey, can't be surprised. It's the same for all bigots, they're never original aren't they?

#sort of a vent #personal #politics and such #writing #tw TERFs #tw transphobia #cw lots and lots of swearing #vent #thoughts about being non binary and visibly gay in every way #ngl it's kind of a miracle I haven't been beaten yet for existing since I really am visibly... yeah #like the way i hold myself is very very much unorthodox in how i entirely exist #I'm so freaking queer regardless of how I dress because I don't act according to gender roles at all and it's very obvious #The way I dress sort of lessons it because I dress in a way that may put me in slightly less danger #and by that I mean not wearing a dress like I want to #but even then I'm also androgynous so the opposite is alao true with dressing masc #It just slightly works better because I wear a binder #pretty sure if i didn't wear a binder I would have been stalked at this point #I can get away with looking cis when I put in effort to Blend In™ when I leave the house #but like #bro #“I can put effort into making myself look different so I'm not killed by strangers” isn't exactly the best bar to set #And of anyone reads this and is like “oh but you chose this” then #society being sexist isn't a good thing #and being attacked for not confirming to gender roles is alao Very Bad Actually #I wouldn't be taking the side of that and if this you then congrats you're the problem #aka the one making it hard for actual feminists to adress the above issue

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comradekatara · 2 years

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the gaang + how theyd act during a breakup? (whether its them getting broken up with or them breaking up with the other person doesnt rlly matter, your choice!)

whether being dumped or doing the dumping, aang is very amicable and understanding during breakups, and remains genuine friends with all of his exes. people would assume he had insidious intentions if they didn’t know him, but they do know him, and well... he’s aang!

when katara says to a guy that they should “take a break” that either means she’s blocking his number and avoiding him forever, or she’s gonna call him up in two weeks at 2 am and they’ll be back together next morning. it’s a real toss up with her.

(and if katara is the one GETTING dumped, then she and zuko are lighting all of his belongings on fire and watching the blaze, baby!!!!)

sokka “doesn’t do labels” so he’s never been through a real breakup? the only time he did was when she died in his arms, and he doesn’t wanna talk about that!!!!!! hahahahahha :)

toph just ghosts people after she gets bored of them, and she doesn’t begrudge anyone who does the same to her. everlasting monogamous love may be cute in theory, but it’s just not her thing. if she wanted a wife she’d just ask sokka

zuko doesn’t really go through breakups because he can barely get past a first date (usually set up against his will by either iroh or katara) without ghosting and/or being ghosted. the worst breakup he ever went through was his on and off relationship with mai in their teens, and it’s not even like he particularly wanted to be with her in the first place, so...

suki also “doesn’t do labels” but still manages to find herself in the middle of very intense dyke drama regardless (it’s just a product of the circles she runs in) which can be a real hassle sometimes, like if she wants to buy good fresh produce, but was just excommunicated from her vegan co-op because she hooked up with a girl who erased kyoshi’s bisexuality by calling her a lesbian, and then when someone gently let suki know that she had relations with a biphobe, suki said “lol i don’t really care to be honest?” and now she’s on their blacklist :/ stuff like that

azula’s first crush as a kid ended pretty horribly (you remember), and as an adult, it takes her a really long time to realize that she’s just performing the milestones of dating rather than actually letting herself get emotionally invested, and if she does find herself catching feelings, she’ll break things off before she can rejected by them. plus, she has very high standards............ she’s bad at dating, is what im saying.

ty lee is constantly dumping people, but sometimes she doesn’t even realize she’s dating someone until she’s forced to break up with them. a lot of guys think they’re dating her, meanwhile she didn’t even know she swung that way! sometimes she has no choice but to resort to violence, which she absolutely HATES :) SOOO MUCH ;)

when mai finally broke things off with zuko for good, suki and toph insisted on throwing her a party, and they invited ty lee, the kyoshi warriors, sokka, aang, teo, and june (she didn’t attend, but she was invited as their guest of honor). by the end of the night mai was wasted and she and aang were doing karaoke that involved choreographed dance routines. (fwiw, zuko and katara had their own party, and it was almost as good.)

#imadisasterwalking #asks #the gaang and #this isn’t modern au btw kyoshi island is just full of vegan co-ops #mai would be very bad at casual dating but luckily her entire history is just zuko —> ty lee #so she dodged a bullet there #zuko meanwhile is being tortured on horrible first dates with perfectly nice people #poor thing #he loves living vicariously thru kataras dating life tho #he has LOTS of opinions on her exes #the only thing they truly agree on is that aang is an angel we love aang <3 #also I don’t actually think ty lee ENJOYS violence but like. she doesn’t NOT enjoy it either . so

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hellomynameisbisexual · 3 years

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“QUEER”

First of all, let’s clear up a common misconception. Queer does not just mean gay. It’s an umbrella term for an identity which deviates from society’s perceived norm: heterosexual, or straight. Queer can refer to sexualities — gay, bisexual, pansexual, — or it can refer to being gender-queer; i.e, any label that deviates from the perceived gender norm: the binaries, male and female.

“Queer” is a reclaimed slur.

If you do not fall under the umbrella of queerness, it is safe to assume that you cannot use it. At all.

I am bisexual.

This means I experience attraction to plural genders. Pansexual also works fine. For the difference between bisexual and pansexual — see here:

Being bisexual isn’t easy. I went through similar hardships to gay women: I experienced attraction to women and was scared of what this meant for me, in such an oppressively homophobic society.

I am not saying being bisexual is harder than being gay, nor the inverse. But my experiences are distinctly bisexual, not gay.

Without further ado, here are the 3 things I’ve found to be the hardest about being queer, but not gay (enough).

#1: Finding My Place

Or, not being queer enough

I always knew I wasn’t straight, but I didn’t know what I was. Up until recently, I was still questioning. This didn’t feel enough to join groups or conversations with LGBT+ folk, let alone go to pride. Was I even LGBT if I was never L, G, B, or T?

I am still yet to attend a pride, even though I identify (fairly confidently) as bisexual. I am in a relationship with a man. This is (problematically) known as a “straight-passing relationship” and makes me feel even more undeserving of a place at pride.

This has been upsetting to me at times. But for others, it can be outright devastating. Growing up and needing support, but feeling like you’re ‘not gay enough’ to ask for it? So many young people are being left alone and afraid. Finding others like you is vital to figuring out who you are. Likewise, finding spaces which are safe and inclusive is vital for anyone, regardless of their sexuality or gender identity. A friend of mine happens to be a transgender man, and he summed up the issue perfectly:

“One thing that I keep noticing is how all hangout spots are “gay bars”, or (far less common) “lesbian bars”. I’m a straight man, so I don’t feel like I’m supposed to be there, but hanging out at regular bars is still too much of a gamble, so I don’t really have anywhere to go.”

It goes without saying that gay folk aren’t always safe in these spaces, as seen by the homophobic attack on the Pulse nightclub in Orlando, in 2016. Bigotry hurts the entire LGBT+ community. Bigotry doesn’t stop to ask whether you identify as gay or otherwise queer before it pulls the trigger.

But the LGBT+ community itself is much more welcoming to those who “pick a side” and just come out as gay, already. The infighting is inexplicable when one looks to attacks such as that in Orlando: bigots don’t care which letter you are in the acronym. So why does gatekeeping exist when we need to be strong in the face of intolerance when fragmentation only makes us weaker? Who are we helping by continuing to exclude identities from the discussion?

#2: Myths and Misconceptions

Well, it stands to reason that if bisexuals are what they seem in TV and movies, why would anyone want to make them feel included? They’re “greedy” and inauthentic. They’re attention-seeking, not to mention their propensity for threesomes. Now, I haven’t been in a wild orgy yet, but it seems like it will only be a matter of time before I follow my natural path.

Straight men, in particular, need to own up to their assumption that bisexual women are down for a threesome. The thing is, we are. But not with you, you big ASSUMER.

Infidelity

All jokes aside, the stereotyping of bisexuals is not only hurtful, but leads to difficulties finding and maintaining relationships.

As I came to terms with my bisexuality, I also had to accept that I might never be fully trusted by my partner, regardless of their gender or sexuality. I was shocked when my partner reacted to my coming out with the equivalent of a shrug — so much so, that I burst into tears of gratitude that my soul-bearing moment hadn’t been met with slut-shaming or assumptions of disloyalty. Nothing has changed. If anything, our bond is even stronger for me having been more authentic after coming out.

But cruelty came from elsewhere: when I came out, I was told that my partner was to be pitied, either because I’m gay and in denial, or bound to cheat on him. The main consequence of such attitudes has been the crippling fear of coming out to my partner. It saddens me that I felt so relieved when he accepted me for being who I am, and loving him just the same as I always have.

This outcome is not the case for many couples, with straight folk worried that their bisexual partner will realise they’re gay and just leave them. This fear of abandonment comes from a place of ignorance. When the media presents bisexuality as a steppingstone on the way to “picking a team”, it’s no wonder that people struggle to trust their queer partners.

Other Queer Myths

The myth that all trans folk medically transition invalidates those who choose not to do so, and let’s not forget the ignorant jeers that it's all just a mental illness. Asexual folk battle the stereotype that they can never have a relationship and shall forever remain a virgin (because what an awful thing that would be, right?) And pansexuals… well, at the lighter end, they’re asked if they have sex with cooking utensils. But often, they’re erased as irrelevant because “we already have the label bisexual”.

This brings us onto the third and final difficulty that comes with queer folk who aren’t easily categorizable as gay: erasure.

#3: Erasure

Erasure refers to the denial of an identity’s existence or its validity as a label.

Non-binary folk face ongoing and loud claims that they simply do not exist. This is despite the historical and scientific evidence to the contrary. Plus, the most important evidence — them, existing. Asexual folk are told they simply have not found the right person yet, or that they are just afraid of sex. Demi-sexual folk are told “everyone feels like that, unless they’re just sleeping around!”. And bisexuals are dismissed as simply being in denial that they’re gay.

Monosexuality & The Gender Binary

Our culture is so built on monosexuality (being solely attracted to one gender — for instance, gay or straight). Monosexuality is reinforced through everything from marriage to dating apps, the media to what we teach in schools. People cannot fathom that someone might want to experience more than one gender in their lifetime.

The binary models of sex and gender are also deeply ingrained. These rigid belief systems combined are to blame for our inability to accept that bisexuals do not need to “pick a side”. I was paralysed by fear for 17 years because I found girls attractive and that might mean I’m gay, because bisexuals are just gays who haven’t realised they’re gay yet.

Bierasure

Bierasure is dangerous, firstly because it leads a child to have to internalise both biphobia and homophobia. For instance, I had to work through being taught to hate gayness, whilst being taught that any attraction to non-male genders made me gay.

Women were cute, and so I was gay, and this meant I was disgusting.

My own mother told me this. She also told me that something has “gone wrong in the womb” for a child to be gay. (Well, Mum, I’ve got some bad news about your womb!)And she, like any bigot, extended this theory to anyone who experiences same-sex attractions — anyone queer. This is another reason why bi-erasure is perilous. Whether you’re a gay, cis-male or a demi-bisexual, trans woman… if your parents will kick you out for being gay, they will likely kick you out for being any sort of queer.

If we deny the bigotry that bisexuals undergo, we will continue to suffer. It won’t just go away. It will fester, with bisexuals having no one they can go to who believes them. And thus:

Erasure Kills

Bullying and suicide rates of queer-but-not-gay people continue to sky-rocket. We must direct funding, support and compassion to every queer individual, as they are all vulnerable to discrimination and bullying. The problem is being left to fester. This is in part because bigots treat all queer labels as just ‘gay’, deeming them equally unworthy. This is how far erasure can go.

Conclusion

Earlier on, I stated that my experiences are distinctly bisexual. The same applies to any queer identity.

Emphasising our differing paths and struggles is important to avoid the aforementioned erasure of already less visible groups. But this does not mean that the LGBT+ community should be fragmented by these differences.

If we can unite in our hope to live authentically and love freely, we will be stronger against bigotry. We are fighting enough intolerance from without: there is no need to create more from within.

So out of everything, what’s the hardest part about being bisexual?

It’s the fact that nobody knows it’s this hard.

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rantingcrocodile · 2 years

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Please stop trying to make the amount homophobic bihets seem very tiny. Most of you dumb fucks are homophobic.

When gay men and lesbians talk about how often we face homophobia from bi people, you pieces of shit will belittle our experiences, tell us we're crazy and will tell us what we are experiencing isn't common when it fucking is. Every gay person I know has experienced homophobia from bi people, or were treated badly by bi people because they were gnc.

We are facing so much more issues than bi people because they are also oppressing us with straight people. Why? Because the thing you have in common with them is osa. You're socialized way closer to straight people than to gay people.

You're making it so hard for us, way harder than it already was. The worst thing we do to you is say "half gay half straight" or exclude you from our dating pools. We are actually suffering, yet you're concerned with a few women on radblr saying bihet or clusterbi, or a few gay men on gcblr saying bi girls often both fetishize them and lesbians alike.

Oh, I love games like this. I can play, too.

"Please stop trying to make the amount of biphobic LG seem very tiny. Most of you dumb fucks are biphobic.

When bisexuals talk about how often we face biphobia from lesbians and gay men, you pieces of shit will belittle our experiences, tell us we're crazy and will tell us what we are experiencing isn't even real when it fucking is. Every bisexual I know has experienced biphobia from either lesbians or gay men, or were treated badly by lesbians or gay men because they did nothing but exist as bisexual people.

We are facing so many more issues than you consider or even care to admit because you don't care about anyone but yourselves and only want us as silent bodies to support you, to the point that you enjoy supporting the straight people who oppress us. Why? Because the thing you have in common with them is your monosexuality. You're socialized way closer to straight people than to bisexual people when it comes down to you both refusing to accept that bisexuality as a sexuality even exists.

You're making it so hard for us, way harder than it already was. The worst thing we do to you is say "stop being biphobic" or demand actual inclusion in LGB spaces when we're right there in the name, too, since you're selfish enough to want LGB spaces to only cater to you. We are actually suffering, yet you're concerned with a few women on radblr saying "biphobia is bad, stop that please" or "you're aligning yourselves with straight people because you're obsessed with hating us," and become bitter when faced with the truth that the LG are the ones with the power in the LGB community, where the LG are the ones obsessed with erasing bisexual history, where the LG are the ones obsessed with making everything LGB about yourselves and yourselves only, where you deliberately stop being able to read scientific studies when it suits you to keep being biphobic, where you deliberately forget how to undertake real class analysis when it comes to bisexuals because you prefer to keep being biphobic, where you don't mind being homophobic as long as it attacks bisexuals, where you don't mind being racist as long as it attacks bisexuals, where you won't stop until you can break bisexuals down to "bihet vs febfem" to lull "febfems" into a false sense of security before you turn around and attack them as "political lesbians" or "appropriating the lesbian experience," and where you even overtake intracommunity discussions involving gay men talking about gay older men molesting young gay and bisexual boys to jump and pretend that gay men are never abusers, only bisexual men to keep your biphobia at the forefront."

You only think we're "oppressors" because if you faced the truth about the actual biphobia in the community, you would feel like an oppressor.

But no bisexual is calling you an oppressor.

I can tell the truth and be honest about homophobic bisexuals and I condemn them all day long.

You can't. And that's the difference.

You obsess with hating us because you know I'm right and it's all nothing more than a guilty conscience.

Die fucking mad about it.

#crocodilian answers #The problem that you biphobes have is that while I'm far from the smartest person in the room #I'm still always smarter than all of you #So again #Die mad about it :)

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thekatebridgerton · 2 years

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The only thing I care about Sophie's casting is that when she gets announced she receives more love messages than hate ones, I'm sure a lot of people will be upset about her BEING A WOMAN! I'm sure Benedict's storyline in S2 will upset the people who believe he should end up with a man even if they said since the beginning that all the couples will end with their canon couples

Okay I've been debating how to answer this for a while and I guess it's all in how you see it Anon.

While it's true that Benedict's character is 100% queercoded (and Eloise to a lesser extent) and deserves a chance to explore all that can of worms on screen for all the glory of the LGBTQ community to enjoy. The reaction to Sophie being a woman would also have a lot to do with WHEN the audience started liking Bridgerton. For book fans who have been in this for ages and have gotten used to the idea of a Sophie for years, having Benedict's ultimate love interest turn out to be a man would feel incredibly like betrayal. Because the character in a way has aged with the readers who are looking forward to Benedict's relationship with Sophie.

But if people were only introduced to Benedict in the show, where Benedict is way more queercoded than in the books his character development in season 1 would feel too much like queerbaiting. And fandoms are usually very very passionate in their dislike of this particular type of 'almost' LGBTQ representation. They would be right to be angry. It sucks when a show just uses a character's sexual orientation to lure in viewers without giving them the pay off.

But at the same time should Benedict turn out to be either Bisexual (or Pansexual). And still end up with Sophie, then it should be treated in the show as bluntly as possible. Because Bisexuals are notoriously misinterpreted in media and if they're going to do it, do it right!! So that his storyline feels less like queerbaiting and more like character development.

I am personally hoping their relationship progresses as organically as possible with Ben's bisexuality coming into play in a natural way. (Not in a forced representation sort of way.)

All in all I do prefer Sophie as a woman, I grew up with the Bridgerton books and would love to see my beloved character Sophie Beckett be played on screen by a great actress and be given the love she deserves. But if she isn't and Benedict's storyline ends up being super gay, and instead of Sophie we get a Solomon then that's okay too.

I've got a ton of romantic white Hetero oriented media I can enjoy. If I want a Cinderella story with X and Y characteristics, I can have my pick. Because it's all the media that's been allowed to exist since the founding of Hollywood. The LGBTQ community doesn't have that. They don't have a large pool of options that show the spectrum of their representation. And they're allowed to demand it.

Does this mean a Benedict gay storyline would be more interesting for me and that I won't feel sad if Sophie is erased from the storyline? No! I'll still get sad and I'll still be mad about it. I'm human and I love that character.

The difference is that I just won't go into people's internet safe places and rant about it. I'm not a jerk. If I don't like things I don't try to make those who like it feel bad. That's not okay. And those who do that need to seriously re-evaluate themselves.

I think this is something that needs to change in fandom culture. The whole thing about shaming others for liking what they like. It's not something I agree on. Especially because it just makes the fandom more toxic and unwelcoming.

And there are people who do it on both sides of the argument so this needs to be addressed

#this took a turn #but i'm serious #I love Sophie #but if she's not in Bridgerton #I'll still continue to love her

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esarkay999 · 3 years

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This may or may not be a hot take. I'm not a Sylkie fan. But I don't buy into the arguments against it, that it's 'selfcest,' either. It doesn't even affect reality because it can't happen in real life in the way it's happening in the show. So, the only excuse left around demonizing it is, "it makes me uncomfortable." That's cool. But it doesn't mean that people should stop writing that sort of thing. Write whatever the hell you want. Just tag it. Fanfiction and fanart doesn't have the same impacts mass media do... I suspect, the only people complaining that being against Sylkie is 'Bisexual erasure' are either straight women for Sylkie or Bi women for Sylkie who have a preference for men. I'm a part of the second group but I can still be unbiased about this. Loki's and Sylkie's relationship reinforces Heteronormativity and makes same-sex-attraction seem inferior to straightness which is Homophobia and Biphobia. When Bisexuals have to erase, suppress, hide the same-sex attracted part of themselves to appease Heteros, that is just as oppressive as having to erase your opposite sex attraction to be accepted and respected by monosexuals in the LGBTQ community. It's frustrating and harmful, hearing certain people constantly ignoring what I last wrote. There are Bisexuals who've been forced to hide one part of themselves (the same-sex-attracted part) and have dealt with Bi/Homophobia when others have discovered they were attracted to the same sex. That can be very traumatizing and damaging.

There are also bisexuals who at certain times in their lives, have been exclusively attracted to the same sex. There are bisexuals who are more attracted to the same sex, overall. Why couldn't Loki have been the later type of bisexuals? Because Disney wanted to make their money without offending homophobes and bisexuals who are mostly or currently exclusively attracted to the opposite sex. When you spew all these self-serving arguments in the future, please consider this. Not all Bisexuals have coasted through life like yourself. That also doesn't mean I'm for Loki/Mobius. I just don't find the actor who plays Mobius, attractive. I don't wanna imagine that. And I like dark, problematic elements in my fictional romances. But because I have a strong distaste for this pairing, the problematic elements I noticed in Mobius and Loki's dynamic, just solidifies my distaste for this pairing, even more. I noticed the abusive imbalance of power between them in the beginning and it made me mortified for Loki and even a bit frustrated with how the writers wrote him, so easily, cringily, OOCishly submitting to it and opening up to Mobius when in a real life, therapeutic relationship, this dynamic would be highly unethical and traumatizing for the client. Now, if that's what you intend to write, it's not real and life is full of people doing unethical things so why can't those stories be told but in the context of this being a ship and in me seeing myself in Loki, it sucks for me.

People claim Mobius showed Loki compassion. I disagree. He needed him for his own self-centered purposes which was to catch another Loki. He didn't seem to actually care about Loki, at all. He seemed to have a strong contempt bordering on scorn, for him. That's not compassion. That's not empathy. It was almost traumatizing for me to watch. I just hated it. There was too little focus on Loki's psyche like I wanted and too much focus on Sylvie, Sylkie, Mobius and everything else. Disappointed with the direction of the show, overall. But I do love Loki and hope that T.H. remains employed as Loki or in other roles for the foreseeable future. I'd rather create OCs in my fanfictions for Loki to be with like putting him with an OC, T.H. version of himself because two T.H. Lokis are double the sexiness. And same-sex attracted men being portrayed in media in obviously sexual ways, spits in the face of homophobia and heteronormativity, for all those saying 'Gay fetishization.' Even straight men being sexualized by women bucks against the status quo and the straight male gaze. It can sometimes be harmful for women attracted to men to sexualize Gay men depending on the context. But I don't think writing Gay fanfic is the same as women pressuring random Gay and Bi men to perform for them in real life or some obviously creepy and wrong shit like that. Fiction =/= equal reality. Ship and let ship.

#Loki show #Loki #Mobius #Sylvie #LGBT #Bisexuals #Not An Anti #Was Disappointed By The Show But Hope Tom Hiddleston Keeps Playing Loki and Getting Other Roles For Forseeable Future #Sylkie #Lokius #Or Whatever You Call Them As A Pair #Ship and Let Ship

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sserpente · 3 years

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Hello, this is going to be long, but it feels like the moment to post it. (I apologize for my grammar English is not my first language)

First I just wanted to say that I love everything about your blog, it has been such a comfort in the past 3 years of my life and has really put me through some very distressing moments. I think you are a wonderful person.

I think you are way too kind and far more decent than me spreading positivity and seeing the bright side on the whole Loki finale. I sadly can't do the same because I got so angry and frustrated with the fandom today.

I loved the show, everything about it, I love Sci Fi, and time travel related show, I even rant for an hour with my fiance about how much the show feels like Russell T Davis' Doctor Who and how incredibly clever it was.

As far as I understand the need for representation as a bisexual woman myself I hate it when people get so demanding and entitled over other people who owes you nothing, because they harass and hurt people instead of being constructive about it, thats why queer shows don't get far, because we are to focus on hating what is already there than creating something better or new.

I love the series, and I too wish for loki to end up with Mobius, which I know it won't happen as Drarry didn't happened and Johnlock didn't happened, that's why wonderful writers like you are out there to give us a chance to believe, And I will watch the next season and enjoy it even if doesn't end the way I want it to, because I care and support every wonderful person being in there, I just can't be part of the fandom right now because they are just too demeaning and cruell and I feel erased because if I dated girls and loved some of them and end up falling for a boy am I also not enough Bi? I just can't today.

But I'm so glad that you and others are sticking to positivity, I wish I could be also celebrating that I was right about Kang; (by the way did you notice that he change his time pad before taking it off? He sent loki to that other TVA for a reason.) But I can't, so I wanted to say thanks for being so amazing and doing so much for us fans who needed to be cheer up today.

Heyho there! Hey, English isn't my first language either, no worries!

Thank you so much, love! I'm so happy to hear my blog makes you happy! I've always wanted this place to constitute an escape from the real world and I'm so glad this is what it has become! 💚

I understand what you mean, completely! I was browsing the Loki tag last night to share my excitement and my heart ached when most of what I read was so negative. Like I said yesterday, if you don't like the show and you have your reasons for it, that's fine by me but what a lot of people underestimate is how much hard work went into making this show. Everyone involved and especially Tom put a lot of thought into it and there is a huge difference between posting rude comments because what certain individuals wanted to happen didn’t happen or downplaying the effort they all made to produce this show, and voicing your opinion in a respectful and plausible way.

I understand a lot of fans wanted Mobius x Loki to happen. Sure, why not? But ultimately, the writers make the decision. When I write a book, I create the ships that feel right to me as well if that is what I have planned for the story and what I enjoy writing, they’ll never be able to please absolutely everyone. It’s all subjective, that’s fine. All I ask is for people to be respectful. Real people worked on this show. Real people who poured their heart and soul into this.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I loved the show so much! In fact, with some comments claiming that Loki had no character development in this show (?!) I do ask myself if we’ve even watched the same series. If you disagree with someone, that is okay--and it’s also okay to step away from the conversation if you are getting uncomfortable. There is no reason to waste your energy on rude comments or people trying to force their opinion on you because they believe that just because they didn’t like the show, everyone else has to dislike it too. Just like they have reasons for why they disliked it, we have reasons for why we liked it!

Yes, the way certain aspects of the LGBTQ+ community were represented raised a lot of discussion, one that I do not wish to take part in but if you are interested, I responded to an ask recently that should give you an idea of what I think about the whole discourse, that is as far as I will go.

I’m so glad my post could cheer you up a little! Remember, don’t let it get to you and enjoy the show! In fact, I’ll re-watch the finale tonight. You, and everyone else, can always come here to fangirl about the series with me, anytime! ♥

#loki #loki spoilers #loki show #loki show spoilers #loki series #loki series spoilers

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steverogersbingo · 3 years

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✨ STEVE ROGER BINGO’S ROUND UP - POST 1 ✨

Check out the fills our participants posted from the first month under the cut!

🎨 ART

heaven isn't in the sky (it's underwater) by agron T // Steve/Tony // Mermaids Summary: when steve went underwater he was discovered by three mermaid tony stark instead

Untitled by ABrighterDarkness G // Steve/Bucky // Alpine Summary: Steve and Bucky get distracted, Alpine enjoys every minute.

Space Stone by AriaFandom G // Gen // Moodboard Summary: Galaxy aesthetic for the space stone

Untitled by sanguineterrain G // Gen Summary: Magical, canon-divergent Steve

Untitled by call-me-kayyyyy G // Steve/Bucky // AU; Fantasy; Loin-cloths Summary: Steve and Bucky are elf's who ride their unicorns to check the perimeter.

Steve Rogers becomes Cernunnos by pinkybitesu T // Gen // AU Summary: Steve had always felt connected to the Earth. Becoming the God of the Forest, Cernunnos, made it all make sense.

"That Is America's Ass." by bleedxblack T // Steve/Bucky Summary: Steve Rogers straddles Bucky's waist with booty shorts that read "it ain't gonna spank himself".

📝 FIC

Clean Up These Bloody Fists by dontcallmebree E // 8,657 // Steve/Bucky // Shrunkyclunks; Mob AU Summary: Bucky can’t decide if Steve’s unendingly generous with his care for those around him, or if Bucky’s simply been lucky enough to scale the wall built up over decades, and had somehow proven himself worthy of the affection. Either way, he knows he’ll never take this for granted. Spend some time with Steve and Bucky this week in the perpetually fluffy ‘verse of Do The Things You Never Showed Nobody.

Scars by Kimberly T // 1,888 // Steve/Bucky // Post-CATWS Summary: The serum means that Steve can't scar anymore, though he's retained his pre-existing scarring. While in the hospital recovering from the fight on the helicarrier, Steve does a little introspection about this. It's bittersweet.

Without Regret by ABrighterDarkness E // 5,284 // Steve/Thor Summary: It had been a very long time since Steve had last felt like this. There was a buzz in his mind and tingling through his body. His movements were just slightly slower, clumsier and his were words spoken a little more loosely with a tongue that felt more weighty than it ought to. Even that, though, felt different than the last time that he’d had the opportunity to overindulge with a friend.

Love and Learning by ABrighterDarkness T // 7,746 // Steve/Natasha Summary: It reminded him, a little bit, of stepping into a machine seeing everything in varying shades of grey. Only to stumble out again into a world of color more vibrant than anything he could have possibly imagined. Overwhelming but entirely breathtaking and welcome.

Good by hawkeyeandthewintersoldier T // 1,062 // Steve/Bucky/Tony Summary: Steve returns to the compound and finds that the two men he loves, but never told his feelings to, are a couple now.

Lie to Me by Kit T // 2,102 // Steve/Bucky // Body Swap Summary: After a mission gone wrong, Steve and Natasha end up trapped in the others body. Instead of telling everybody, they make a bet. Who will be able to conceal their identity the longest?

Dream a Little Dream of Me by buckybleeds E // 5,719 // Steve/Bucky // Dub-con; Self-cest Summary: Steve goes back in time to comfort himself after Bucky fell and ends up having sex with himself.

Pride by Kit T // 1,726 // Steve/Bucky Summary: Tony wants to take Steve to pride to watch him freak out. Natasha tags along to do damage control.

Take Care of You by hawkeyeandthewintersoldier M // 1,756 // Steve/Bucky // Daddy Kink; Age Difference; AU Summary: Steve has been so busy with his work as a commander at shield lately, that he has barely had time for his partner Bucky. Bucky’s worried his Daddy might not want him anymore and Steve has to rectify this by showing how much he loves his baby.

Love Has Left a Printed Trace by Girl_Back_There E // 1,726 // Steve/Bucky // Vampires; Dub-con Summary: Steve is obsessed with finding a mysterious figure named Winter in paintings throughout the years. James is a Vampire named Winter charged with keeping Vampires a secret from humanity.

with the weight of the world at the tips of my fingers by avintagekiss24 E // 4,420 // Steve/Reader // AU Summary: You and Steve share a morning in bed.

Always You by hawkeyeandthewintersoldier M // 1,691 // Steve/Bucky // AU Summary: After a year of traveling, Steve finally comes home and confesses his feelings to Bucky.

Stop the World by Rex E // 6,828 // Steve/Scott // AU Summary: When Steve got hired to entertain at Cassie Lang's thirteenth birthday party, he had thought it was going to be like every other kid's party he'd booked. He'd show up, play Captain America, get paid, and go home. He never quite gets to that last step, but to be fair, there was no way he could have anticipated the draw of Scott Lang.

Always by Rex G // 437 // Steve/Matt Murdock // Canon Divergence Summary: Even the Devil of Hell's Kitchen needs an angel from time to time. This one just happens to be from Brooklyn.

Glass by Rex M // 859 // Gen // Non-graphic torture; Implied non-con; Referenced suicide Summary: "We'll lose." "Then we'll do that together, too." Sokovia crashed, Ultron won, and he always had hated Tony the most.

We are already home by Bitters E // 4,948 // Steve/Bucky Summary: Steve carries an injured Bucky through a portal into…somewhere else? But they’re together, like they always have been, and that’s all that matters.

end of the line, time to go home. by moonythejedi394 M // 3,484 // Steve/Bucky // Canon Divergence; Daddy Kink; Age Play/Regression Summary: Steve and Bucky always said they were together 'til the end of the line. But even they have to get off the train eventually. Everybody always figures, at the end of the line is... Y'know. The End. But actually, at the end of the line is happily ever after. It just took them a few decades and a couple suitcases of trauma to get there.

Not Technically A Bromance by dontcallmebree M // 8,657 // Steve/Bucky Summary: “A bromance?” Bruce asks, voice tinged with restrained laughter. “Yeah, we have one of those.” Steve glowers at Bruce, who’s patently laughing at him, eyes bright and twinkling with mirth. Bruce composes himself, biting at his bottom lip. “And you’ve had sex how many times?” (Inspired by that tweet, you know the one.)

At the Top of My Lungs by ralsbecket T // 1,646 // Steve/Tony Summary: Two months had passed since Tony had lost his life; since they had laid him to rest six feet under. It was two months of trying to keep his world from further falling apart, and it wasn’t really working in his favor. So, no. No, he wasn’t okay.

Thor’s Art Class for the Heroes of Midgard by WinterSabbath T // 6,338 // Steve/Bucky // Canon Divergence Summary: In which Thor makes it his mission to help mend the broken, cold relationship between Steven and James through the only way he can think of: Art class. As a bonus, he also helps the team loosen up.

So Let It Happen by Bitters E // 2,287 // Steve/Bucky // Canon Divergence Summary: Steve comes home from a tough mission and needs to get out of his head. His husband and retired Avenger is only too happy to help him with this.

Made of Glass (The Way You See Through Me) by ralsbecket T // 1,132 // Steve/Tony // AU Summary: Steve wasn’t sure what came over him when the model walked out from the back room, wearing a robe; from the moment his eyes landed on his face, he was just… awestruck. Dark hair, bright eyes, full lips. He was fucking beautiful. Or, the one where Tony is the model in Steve's life-drawing class.

for your cooperation by xceru E // 3,145 // Steve/Nat // Canon Divergence Summary: Hydra kidnaps Natasha on a routine mission in Cairo. When Steve finds her, Natasha decides that it's his turn to play prisoner.

my heart in the still winter air by xceru E // 11,887 // Steve/Bucky/Nat // Canon Divergence Summary: “He will,” Steve says, and suddenly Natasha understands. This is the man that Steve altered his heart for, the one he thought only the serum could love. But now Steve knows better—he knows he’s bisexual—he knows his love is real, and the man that it belongs to is undead.

Won't Let Go by afalsebravado E // 2,358 // Steve/Bucky // Canon Divergence Summary: Steve is on the hunt for the Winter Sold-- Bucky. He's on the hunt for Bucky when the leads dry up and he heads home to regroup. But a package from Tony Stark arrives on his doorstep and makes him re-evaluate old promises.

The Truth of Who I Am by hawkeyeandthewintersoldier T // 1,203 // Steve/Bucky // Canon Divergence Summary: Steve Rogers is not a cis straight man and he is tired of people erasing that and other parts of his identity so he fits into the image they already had of him.

Bruise of a Rose by marvelousmoons G // 1,710 // Steve/Bucky // Canon Divergence Summary: It’s moments like this that get under his skin the most. The way Steve can just… be Steve. Be dramatic and give Bucky the cold shoulder for simply caring. But Bucky was stronger. He could play Steve’s game. He wouldn’t cave, no. He would sit and wait for the silence to overwhelm Steve first.

... And all I got was this lousy t-shirt by RainbowNerds M // 3,126 // Steve/Bucky // AU Summary: A month ago, Steve had the best sex of his life with a guy he met in a bar, and went home with the most hideous shirt he'd ever seen but no phone number. Enter his new roommate, Becca. The two instances are not connected, right?

Love you too, jerk by WinterRaven G // 636 // Steve/Bucky // Canon Divergence; Fanart included Summary: Steve makes breakfast for Bucky and their 'kids' help him wake up his husband.

#steve rogers bingo 2021 #2021 round up

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entity9silvergen · 3 years

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Mosaic (Disenchantment Fanfiction)

Summary: We are just mosaics of everyone we love and that mosaic shows everyone we love how beautiful they are. Bean doesn’t think she can love like everyone else but maybe that’s okay.

Fandom: Disenchantment

Word Count: 2K

Characters: Bean

Relationships: Bean/ Mora, Mentioned Bean & Everyone, Mentioned Odval/ Sorcerio, Mentioned Zog/ Oona, Mentioned Zog/ Dagmar

Warnings: Internalized arophobia, first person pov, some self-deprecation, sex mention, drug mention, mention of interspecies relationships in fantasy setting

Other Tags: F/F, Mentioned F/F QPR, Reflection/ Self-Reflection/ Internal Thoughts, No Dialogue, Queerplatonic, Aromantic Character, Aromantic Homosexual Character, Arospec Character, Queer Themes, Unreliable Narrarator, S3E6, Oneshot, AroWriMo 2021

Author’s Note: My friend sent me the line “I am a mosaic of everyone I’ve ever loved” about twenty minutes after I watched “Final Splash.” I’m working on the prompt for Week 2 of AroWriMo rn but I had to drop everything and write a short fic about this. Again, I didn’t really use the prompt but it kind of fits with week 1’s prompt romo/loveless & future.

I’m headcanonnoning Bean as aro or demiro/ greyro. I think in the show it was implied she never experienced romantic attraction prior to meeting Mora because she likes women and I don’t want to erase that in any way but Bean still gives off a big aromantic bisexual homo(queer)platonic vibe.

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My name is Princess Tiabeanie of Dreamland and I’ve never loved anyone.

I mean, I love my dad and my friends and all that but I’ve never loved loved anyone. Is that weird to say? That makes it sound like I don’t really love my dad and Elfo and Luci and everyone. I probably shouldn’t say that then because I actually love them a lot. They’re my everything.

One time, I was walking down Elf-Ally and this elf was sitting on the side of the road with some chalk. I feel like elves would really like chalk but I’ve never seen any of them use it, not even Arto, except this guy. I’d never seen anything like it before so I asked what he was doing and he said he was making this mosaic to show his love for this other elf he liked. I didn’t really understand it so he explained it to me like this: we are just mosaics of everyone we love and that mosaic shows everyone we love how beautiful they are.

I still didn’t get it so I just laughed at him and he got kind of upset and threw a piece of chalk at me. It didn’t really hurt but Luci was with me and the elf started throwing stuff at him and you know how Luci gets when he hits his nose so we left. I couldn’t really forget what that elf said though.

You see, a mosaic is a mix of a bunch of little pieces taken from different things that all come together to make one thing. There’s this mosaic at the church and it’s pretty freaking ugly but the mosaic this elf was making was just so beautiful. He used so many colors and he drew all these little pictures and hid these words I didn’t understand in them. I’d expect it to be all crude and gross like those scribbly pictures Derek would draw when he was younger that Oona pretended to love but it all came together so well. It didn’t even look like separate pieces. It was just one.

I couldn’t stop thinking about it. The influences of countless parts of my life, weaving together into an insanely complex mesh- That felt like me. I always felt like something was broken in me but maybe I’m just a mosaic.

I think my dad made me who I am the most. Even if he wasn’t really present most of my life. Sure, we don’t see eye to eye sometimes but I think we’re better because of that. He made me strong. His actions guided me into becoming the woman I am today. He taught me how to keep fighting. Literally and figuratively. He taught me to keep my head up and he taught me how to stab people. It’s pretty cool. I remember this one time as a kid he took me out to the courtyard, stole this guy’s knife, and taught me how to use it. I think I still have the knife actually. I don’t stab people with it anymore though.

(I hope he’s okay. He hasn’t been the same in awhile.)

My mom… Well, I don’t really love her anymore but I did for a long time. She was… How do I put it? A constant in my life. Even though she wasn’t there. What I felt towards her, it kept me together for a long time. When I had nothing to fall back on, I always had her memory. Until she tried to take over Dreamland, obviously. Now I just say she gave me my love for alcohol and that’s pretty sweet too.

(I still miss her. I bet she’s dead.)

You know those pictures where the guy has an angel and demon on his shoulders telling him what to do? That’s Elfo and Luci, and it’s literal for Luci. And maybe for Elfo? He did go to heaven that one time. It can be kind of annoying to hear them bickering all the time, especially since they almost never want the same thing, but I wouldn’t trade them for anything. Elfo keeps me safe and Luci pushes me to be more than I am. They make life fun. Fuller. Less lonely.

(I’m scared they might leave someday. I wouldn’t blame them.)

I don’t really like Derek but I still love him. Maybe a little less since he tried to burn me at the stake. Maybe a little more since he chickened out at the last second. And a little less because he still went through with it. And maybe a little more since it was an accident. We have a complicated relationship but he’s still my little brother, as weird as he is. He reminds me of what I have to fight for, if that makes sense. I don’t really see him as the future of Dreamland or anything but he’s still a little kid and I can’t really help but have a soft spot for him. Don’t tell him I said that.

(I wonder if he’ll keep me around when he’s king. I’d be lying if I said I was surprised.)

The same goes for Oona. I never liked her but I think I love her. Especially after she tried to save me from my mom. And since she became an epic pirate. She’s awesome. She’s the mom I always wished I had except she was actually there the whole time and I didn’t realize it. I’m happy with how things turned out though. I don’t regret it. Plus she’s got great taste in drugs. I still steal them sometimes.

(I don’t know if she loves me. Maybe she did once but not anymore.)

I kind of hate Odval and Sorcerio in a weird way where I like them at the same time. They’re not really family but always been there. Like they’re kind of like second dads to me. Second dads whose the sex lives I know way too much about. My gay polyamorous uncles? But they kind of care under all that court properness and tradition nonsense so they’ve kind of wormed their way into my heart. They’ve always made my life difficult but I don’t think I would be myself if I wasn’t challenged so much.

(I think they’d rather have me gone. They don’t hide it every well but I can pretend.)

I’m going to be honest, I was really bummed when Pendergast died. We were kind of the same age and he hung around the castle for most of my life. And my dad trusted him so we actually did stuff together sometimes. A lot of adventures that never really went anywhere. He could be kind of a stick in the mud but he never really minded that I’m a girl and let me tag along on crusades and helped me get better with weapons and stuff. And Pendergast was weirdly loyal to Dreamland, even after Dad forked his eye out. Or was it spooned? I don’t remember. Some kind of eating utensil. I wasn’t there when it happened. But it was nice knowing I could trust him. He could be kind of fun though when he was off-duty. Total lightweight though. He threw up on one of those little guys who carries dad’s cape once.

(I wish I’d known him better. I really miss him but I can’t tell anyone since Dad gets set off by anything that even reminds him of the guy.)

Who else is there? That’s right, Mertz and Turbish. Turbish and Mertz. Two peas in a pod. Plus Mrs. Mertz. Don’t get me wrong, they are idiots. Totally incompentant. It’s a wonder they’re still alive. But they’re sweet. And they try. They’re not good at anything but they try. Sometimes I don’t want to try but they tell me I always can.

(I’m waiting for the day they realize they could have a better life. It’ll be weird not having them around the palace.)

I even kind of like Merkimer. As a pig, not a human. God, he was an awful human but he’s a funny little pig. He lets Luci ride on his back sometimes. Both of them like it way more than either of them will ever admit. It’s cute. I think they’re friends. If they’re not, Elfo and I will start plotting until they are. Or maybe not. A Luci-Merkimer friendship might be too much for Dreamland to handle. They’re kind of a lot, even on their own. Merkimer always kind of had a big head and it only got bigger when he accepted his new life. It’s actually kind of inspiring how happy he is now.

(I don’t want him to change but he already has. It makes me sad sometimes.)

And Bunty. Oh, Bunty. And Stan! The world doesn’t really deserve Bunty. Stan does though. I think they’re the ones who taught me what real love is. Bunty always showed me love as a kid, she was like the second mom I never had but actually did have because Oona was there. But she gave me something neither Oona or Dagmar could. I didn’t really understand it until I saw her and Stan and their family together. I still don’t. They’re really sweet.

(I’d give them everything. I know they just see me as some spoiled princess though.)

I want what those two have. Or what Odval and Sorcerio have. What my dad had with Dagmar or Oona. What Elfo’s had, and Luci’s had, and Derek’s had, and the knights have had. It feels like everyone’s had that kind of deep love at some point except me. I didn’t even realize until I was talking to Mora.

I’ve had the chance to have it. Merkimer, that brother of his I accidentally killed, that one time Pendergast made a pass at me, that Steamland guy… I don’t think any of it really would’ve worked out though. I’ve had a lot of things with guys and there’s been kissing and touching and I’ve always enjoyed it but I think I always knew it would never go anywhere. That it will never go anywhere. And I can’t even blame my dad because it’s all me. It’s always been me. And I’m okay with that? Maybe? I don’t think so but I’m not really good at understanding my feelings. It’s just another thing on the pile of things I won’t work through.

I think I understood what I had with Mora though. It wasn’t… romantic but it felt like it almost was. We just… clicked. It felt right. She was tough and funny and she didn’t hold anything back. She followed her dreams and didn’t let the world get her down. That one night we had together, I felt like we were alone in the world.

Mora gave me the ocean and the stars.

She was beautiful. Maybe that’s what was missing? None of the guys I ever screwed around with were beautiful. Not like Mora was. Not like a woman can be. I really felt like this was it but there was still that disconnect. Like something was there but not quite. Like something was missing. I don’t know what it was.

But then she just left. I had that dream and I just felt so happy. I’d never felt happiness like that. And I never felt pain like the pain I felt when I woke up and the necklace was gone. I definitely would’ve cried if Elfo wasn’t there. I might’ve actually cried a little bit. It’s kind of hard to hear anything when Elfo’s sobbing. Some of those tears might have been mine.

Did I love her? I don’t think so. Not like Elfo loved that boat. It wasn’t romantic. But it was real. It gives me hope. I don’t think I’m capable of the same kind of love everyone else seems capable of and that’s not even a slight at me. It’s just reality. But what I had with Mora, however brief and imagined it was, tells me that’s okay. I don’t need the kind of love everyone else has. Not when I have so many others in my life.

Still, I hope I see her again, even for a second, just to feel that kind of happiness again.

I think that’s what that elf meant when he said we are just mosaics of everyone we love and that mosaic shows everyone we love how beautiful they are. Mora was beautiful and she didn’t see it but maybe she would if she saw how I looked at her.

Stars and the ocean, I’ll never forget them. They’ll be a part of my mosaic forever.

Other AroWriMo Fics By Me, Posted on Ao3, Posted on FFN

#fanfiction #fanfic #arowrimo #aromantic writing month #week 1 #i am doing another one #oneshot #disenchantment #disenchanted season 3 #disenchanted netflix #disenchanted bean #disenchanted mora #i don't know why the tags are wrong #aromantic #aspec #aromantic allosexual character #queer themes

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5typesoftrash · 3 years

Text

warning: this is going to be a long post. transphobia and bigotry under the cut

I am posting this rebuttal of a person who got (hilariously) angry at someone who Does Not Care (me) and wrote an entire-ass essay on this post because apparently this is how I spend my time. Defending my identity which does not need to be defended because it is immutable from transphobic trolls who won’t even see it cause they’re blocked from this account.

Anyway. Be careful looking under the cut.

TERFs, gender-crits, radical feminists, transmeds, nb-exclus, anti-mogai, and anyone else whose ideology promotes transphobia and/or trans erasure, please kindly do not fucking touch this post. I am not kidding when I say that I will report you all to tumblr for hate speech if it takes me all fucking night.

Image Description

Two screenshots of a reblog from tumblr user homosexual-means-gay. The post reads:

please tell me how literally every single gay man being repulsed by ppl with vaginas hurts you! tell us why it’s a problem gay ppl aren’t attracted to the opposite sex like straight and bi ppl are!

homosexuality isn’t a political movement it’s a regular natural innate sexuality. gay men aren’t attracted to biological females and it hurts gay ppl when you side with conversion therapists and it hurts bisexual ppl who actually are attracted to both sexes when you erase them for your homophobic agenda. you’re not a victim. you’re happy to eliminate homosexuality from existence as long as you’re able to reinforce heteronormative gender roles the gay community has always opposed. your bigotry harms trans homosexuals too, not that you transhets care about the gay trans ppl either.

erased from history? you want gay ppl correctively raped out of existence bc you love socially constructed gender roles more than human rights. you deserve all the hate you put out into the world. im sorry our innate orientation and culture prove how flimsy and useless the gender roles you define yourself by are, but homophobia will not improve your self esteem. you’re driving away ppl who would be happy to support your made up identity by attacking how we were born same sex attracted. sorry you can’t relate bc you’re straight. sorry you think you can use your privilege against us. but it’s not something we’re doing to you. it’s not something we can change and it’s not something we want to change. there’s never been a gay man in existence who likes pussy, not even the gay trans women like marsha p johnson and sylvia rivera. you’re a sad little straight girl alienating all potential allies.

hurting us doesn’t validate you. it doesn’t hurt you that no gay man will ever like pussy.

End ID

(If someone wants to do a better ID that’s fine, I just wanted to put everyone on an equal playing field when it comes to understanding the content of this post.)

I’m going to go line-by-line and refute every single bullshit thing this person said.

> please tell me how literally every single gay man being repulsed by ppl with vaginas hurts you!

factoid actually just statistical error. TERF Tommy, who has committed multiple transphobic hate crimes, is an outlier and should not have been counted. I know many cis gay men who are attracted to trans men because they are MEN, not because of the genitalia they have. And I know you want to say ‘that makes them bi’, but no, it doesn’t. You want to accuse me of homophobia? Telling another gay person that their identity is invalid just because they express it in a different way than you do is literal homophobia.

> tell us why it’s a problem gay ppl aren’t attracted to the opposite sex like straight and bi ppl are!

because... some are? And you don’t speak for the entire gay community? Especially not the other side of it, for the opposite binary gender than yours.

> homosexuality isn’t a political movement it’s a regular natural innate sexuality.

and transness isn’t a political movement either, it is a regular natural and innate gender identity. You know that gender identity is inherent, right? When people say ‘gender is a social construct’ all that means is that it is not a natural thing. Humans created the concept of gender and assigned value to it based on what we could perceive as a means of giving order to the world around us. That doesn’t mean that it isn’t important and it doesn’t mean that there aren’t parts of it that are inherent to individuals.

> gay men aren’t attracted to biological females and it hurts gay ppl when you side with conversion therapists and it hurts bisexual ppl who actually are attracted to both sexes when you erase them for your homophobic agenda.

I’m sorry this is literally incoherent. To reiterate: some gay men ARE attracted to assigned females. Yes, siding with conversion therapists hurts gay people. No, I am not siding with conversion therapists. I have never once stated -- in fact, the entire point of my post was the opposite of this -- that anyone should EVER have sexual interactions with a person they don’t want to. Even if the reason for that is because they have a genital preference, which is NOT the same thing as a sexuality.

(I know I’ve been over this before but here it is again. A sexuality is a measure of what GENDER/S you want to have sex with. A genital preference is a measure of what genitalia you are willing to get all up close and personal with. Both are innate, one can be manipulated. They are not the same thing.)

Hurting bisexual people... hey, fellow bis, am I hurting you by *checks notes* existing in time and space?

> you’re not a victim. you’re happy to eliminate homosexuality from existence as long as you’re able to reinforce heteronormative gender roles the gay community has always opposed.

I am literally A GAY PERSON. Even by YOUR MEASURE I am a victim. And I do NOT want to eliminate homosexuality, I just want people to acknowledge that language evolves and definitions can change as our society does. Also, have you ever met a trans person in real life? Because like 80% of all the trans people I’ve ever known have been gender non-conforming, so like. That invalidates that point. The trans community opposes gender roles as well.

> your bigotry harms trans homosexuals too, not that you transhets care about the gay trans ppl either.

Please point to where it says I’m straight. Please. I want to see it.

> erased from history? you want gay ppl correctively raped out of existence bc you love socially constructed gender roles more than human rights.

At this point I’m just repeating myself. Please see the above points for rebuttal.

> you deserve all the hate you put out into the world. im sorry our innate orientation and culture prove how flimsy and useless the gender roles you define yourself by are, but homophobia will not improve your self esteem.

Says the person berating a minor for *flips notecard over* agreeing with them that people shouldn’t be forced into sex. I’m sorry that you’re so hurt and angry that you have to push your pain onto other people just to feel better. I genuinely am. It makes me so sad to see how much some people are hurting. But I won’t just sit and take this kind of verbal abuse. I don’t deserve it, quite frankly.

> you’re driving away ppl who would be happy to support your made up identity by attacking how we were born same sex attracted.

I doubt anyone calling it a made-up identity wants to actually support me. Next.

> sorry you can’t relate bc you’re straight. sorry you think you can use your privilege against us. but it’s not something we’re doing to you. it’s not something we can change and it’s not something we want to change.

Again. I am not straight. I do not have any straight privilege to use against anyone. Even if I was cis I still wouldn’t be straight because I’m aroace and attracted to anyone and everyone. My gender identity isn’t something that I can change, either. And even if I couldn’t, I wouldn’t want to. I love being a man, and I love being a trans man.

> there’s never been a gay man in existence who likes pussy, not even the gay trans women like marsha p johnson and sylvia rivera.

I’m sorry, WHAT. Marsha P Johnson and Sylvia Rivera can’t be both gay men and trans lesbians. Which one are they? You gotta pick, babe.

> you’re a sad little straight girl alienating all potential allies. hurting us doesn’t validate you. it doesn’t hurt you that no gay man will ever like pussy.

So am I a transhet or am I a straight girl? Also I’m not sad, I’m quite happy with where I’m at in my life. I do not feel validated by hurting anyone, because I don’t enjoy pain. I’m not masochistic or emotionless, I am in fact hyperempathetic due to my autism, and I don’t like it when anyone is hurt. This can be evidenced by this post here where I wish well upon a group of people who have directly hatecrimed me in the past.

I will repeat that. I have literal trauma from physical violence as a result of the actions of this group of people, and I am still wishing them good things.

Nor does it hurt me that ‘no gay man will ever like [AFAB genitalia]’ because this isn’t even a true statement. As I have mentioned previously, I know personally multiple gay men who are attracted to trans men. And reader, please note the fact that this person uses a slang term, a deliberately vulgar one, where in my original post I used the medical term ‘vagina’.

Hope this clears some things up.

TERFs, gender-crits, radical feminists, transmeds, nb-exclus, anti-mogai, and anyone else whose ideology promotes transphobia and/or trans erasure, please kindly STILL do not clown on this post. I am once again not kidding when I say that I will report you all to tumblr for hate speech if it takes me all fucking night.

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lilywoood · 4 years

Text

You’ve got a mail 4/15

Hi guys I’m back, it’s been a long time and I missed y’all, things have been crazy on here so I had to step back, it came to a point where I truly hated writing, I was panicked and anxious every time I tried to get back at it, but it’s been take care of and I’m feeling better, I’m still anxious and trust me I’m super scared of posting that new part today, but I didn’t want to make you wait any longer so I hope you’ll like it and I’m sorry for being away for so long ♥️♥️

Tag list : @cherishingstydia @diazbuckleysworld @translucent-bisexual @impossiblealice @hardychick89 @felicitous-one @justsmilestuffhappens @comablog2 @gxtop @jb-ap-94 @chioink @peroquenotevean @tk-carlosforlifex @nighting-gale17 @fyeahhipsterdoctor @leslilupe @anthony-e-stark-3000 @haderofthesociety @iamonlyaliveformalex @wearelosersyoudumbfuck @serenabuckley @multi-fandom-writing @my-name-i-we

Word count : 1533

Song : Miss Americana & the Heartbreak prince - Taylor Swift

From TK: I don’t know how to be happy, it’s like when Alex left me, when he told me about the other guy, it felt as if he sucked all the good things, all the happiness out of me and now…now I feel like an empty shell, like there is a void that I have to fill…

From Buck: How do you fill it?

From TK: By ruining others people happiness, by breaking, hurting and deceiving them, by giving them reasons to give up on me…

From Buck: Well I’m not giving up and neither should you.

He’d remember his last conversation with Buck, remember how they talked for hours about happiness, about whether they deserved it, should chase it, or just hope for it...

He could feel the icy liquid running through his veins, could feel its poison penetrating every cells, every parts of his body, taking possession of his soul, of his being, he could feel each of his limits, each of his barriers giving way as it gained ground, spreading into his system, taking over his brain, his sense, his mind.

He didn’t try to fight it, didn’t try to snap, to take over, after all what was the point of fighting a battle bound to be lost.

Instead he passively watched how his body slowly started to disobey him, how his head was getting foggier by the minute, how strangers laughs faded in the background...

It took him less than five glasses to notice how he had miserably relapsed, spiraled, failed, it took three glasses for him to get more and more drunk, and four glasses to forget his name, his identity, his essence....

He didn’t really remember the why and how he ended up in such a shady place, he just remembered how he’d laughed shaking softly his head as he recalled that it was there that everything changed.

He couldn’t help but see the irony of the situation, of how the only way he could find comfort, relief and solace was in a shady, overcrowded downtown pub, the exact same he’d swore never to set foot again.

Yet here he was once again on a Thursday night four months later slumped over the bar, not caring one bit about the bikers and drunks laughing and slurring around him, too busy contemplating the bottom of his umpteenth whisky glass, admiring its amber color, anticipating its taste and the disastrous effect one swill of it would have.

His eyes were fixed on the golden liquid in his hand, his glass was almost empty but it didn’t fill the void in his heart no matter how many glasses he drank he couldn’t forget the devastated expression Carlos had when he stepped back, when he choose to let him go...

Memories started to cripple their way through his broken mind, his teary face, tossed hair, the feel of his hands gripping his shoulders tightly and the sound of his hoarded voice begging him to think about it...

-Can we talk about it, he’d pleaded grabbing his hand, please, he croaked.

-There’s nothing much to say, TK answered threading a hand through his hair, just give up already, he fidgeted.

-I have the right to know why TK, he demanded his voice quivering, you forced me out of this relationship, out of your life without giving me a real reason, he pursued fighting his tears, was I not enough.

-Truth is I tried loving you and I couldn’t, he lied turning away, I didn’t feel the same, he added squeezing his eyes shut, I’m sorry but there is nothing else to say, he articulated tears silently running down his cheeks.

His chest was aching, he felt his heart breaking even more, regret and remorse tearing it down, he needed the drinks, he needed to forget, needed to erase Carlos crestfallen expression from his mind, needed to forget how his touch lightened him in fire, how his kisses were like a breath of life, how the way he would scream his name was the most perfect melody he’d ever heard.

He needed to remind himself that he did the right things by letting him go, even if it hurt, even if it felt like some part of his soul had been torn away from him, he had to get over their relationship, however short it was, he had to erase Carlos from his skin, had to chase away the ghosts of his kisses, the memories of his caresses, of his touch, and quench the fiery burn of his love, of his devotion.

That was one of the main reason he found himself sharing filthy kisses in a shabby restroom with a total stranger on a Thursday night, any sane person knew how despair and alcohol weren’t a good mix, but TK wasn’t sane and the constant reminder of his recent break up, added to the far echo of Carlos’ voice in his head didn’t help either, and if accepting to be groped by a smelly drunk biker could make the memories go away so be it, if letting a closeted macho male have his way with him could temporarily erase Carlos from his mind, then to hell with it.

He would let any stranger, any blurry faces kiss him, touch him, caress him, screw him if it could for a brief moment, a mere second delete the one he truly wanted, the one he truly needed, and as he felt the burn of the biker beard against his skin, as he smelled his beer imbibed breath he found himself closing his eyes, clenching his fist in a pathetic attempt to keep himself from comparing them both, from letting his brain trick him into remembering how he was repulsed by the fact that someone else was touching him, how someone else was grunting in his ears, how someone else was ordering him to beg for his release, how someone else’s name was slipping from his lips.

He felt dirty, empty, ashamed even, he never thought in all his 26 years that he’ll one day feel this way, felt as if his core was rotten, corrupted, tainted, ruined beyond repair, he never felt that way, never felt so insignificant, so irredeemable, not even when he was hooked on the pills, it was as if the remaining of his soul, the last piece Alex left, had been destroyed, he was an empty shell, a living carcass, the world wasn’t gray anymore, alcohol and sex didn’t make it technicolor, the combination only darkened everything , it was all black and he needed some light, he needed to feel clean again…

From TK: Did you meant it when you said you won’t give up, please tell me you meant it…

From Buck: Of course I meant it, I’ll be there.

From TK: I…I had a slip up, I drank today for the first time in three months, and I never…I feel like such a failure, a disappointment, I feel so empty.

From Buck: You’re human TK, and with all the crap that happened I would have been surprised if you didn’t… what made you slip up thought?

From TK: I made Him cry, I ruined the only good thing that happened to me.

From Buck: You broke up with Carlos

From TK: Yes but trust me it’s better that way.

From Buck: For who you or him, didn’t you told me he was a good guy, that he understood and knew where you came from.

From TK: of course he’s a good guy, he’s everything Alex has ever been, it’s just…I guess I was afraid.

From Buck: Afraid of what, that he would love you?

From TK: No…I was afraid that one day he would wake up and realize that he could do so much better than me, that I’m a screw up, that I’m too much too handle, Alex left me and I nearly died because of it; I guess that letting Carlos go was the less hurtful option.

From Buck: I see where you’re coming from, but it wasn’t your decision to make, Carlos is a big guy, he knows what’s good for him, and he decided you were it, by leaving him without giving him a proper reason… TK by leaving him like this you became Carlos’ Alex…

He sighed glancing at his phone, he knew Buck’s was right, he knew deep down that he tried to take his revenge on Alex by hurting someone else, but Carlos, sweet and caring Carlos wasn’t responsible of the downfall of his relationship, he’d hurt him on purpose hopping that it would’ve reestablished the world natural balance when instead it hurt and destroyed them both, and as his glanced at his disheveled reflection he couldn’t help but wish, foolishly pray the godly force up there to grant him one more chance, one more try.

From TK: Man, sometime I really want you to be physically there, you’re the only one who get me.

From Buck: Seems like your wish has been granted this time…

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vtori73 · 3 years

Text

Okay so... I'm making another post again about this (CW for mentions of Biphobia and transphobia):

Only it's not ABOUT this but it's about what I as a queer ACTUALLY care about in terms of rep and such. Real quick I will say that as much I do agree with SOME of these being bad fancanons for being negative/stereotypical whatever I ALSO think claiming some of these as outright harmful is a bit much & grasping at straws a bit.

Anyway moving on, right now I'm seeing specific Lesbians are harassing the writer of the new Harley Quinn Comic eat, bang, kill tour because they wrote her as Bisexual... not a decision the writer made herself but something that was WRITTEN into the original show that the comic is following.

Like... I'm sorry but first things first based on facts if you know anything about Poison ivy before recent depictions she has been heavily represented/written/depicted as straight, I don't believe if she's ever 100% stated as such but... come on, no straight people were back then, media still doesn't feel the need to state characters as hetero because our society very much does the whole "assumed straight unless stated otherwise." And Poison ivy, in certain depictions ive seen at least, comes off VERY much as for the male gaze and I know lesbians are used this way often BUT this isn't as often in certain media like comics (or wasn't common) where they usually would prefer them be open to men so the demographic they care about can fantasize about being with the character.

Second, this IS definitely being fueled by racism since the writer is Black woman (not mention also queer & disabled) and so far the people responding have been white or at least one of the main ones is.

Third, this is just another one those things that to me REALLY shows how Biphobic certain parts of the Lesbian community can get.

Like I'm sorry, what I'm about to type of probably going make some upset and scream "lesbophobia" but I HAVE to share because I can't be the only one who feels this way... I feel wary around Lesbians online sometimes, not because of any stereotypes but because I've SEEN how openly, some Ive followed even in the past, are to complain about us (Bi+) people and openly explain how they DONT want to share spaces with Bi woman. Look I get wanting to hangout with people just like you, BUT its weird how quickly some Lesbians are to want to discard us and not relate to us because we possibly may like, talk about, be in relationships with men and it's even MORE weird that that's a determent to y'all even though these same types of lesbians make their whole identity/community dependant on men (I'm sorry but even if it's specifically about hating men ur still at the end of the day... making it seem like ur sexuality/community hinges on men) and not you know... loving woman.

I've seen some Lesbians complain about how they need Lesbian ('only' heavily implied) bars and how its annoying that bi woman go to them. And countless of stories of Bi woman being shunned, turned down for being Bi, no I'm not saying that is so awful Lesbians don't want to "sleep" with us (why the parentheses? eh just that I'm not going to assume ALL anyone wants to do after meeting in a bar is to fuck it's probably a good chunk of the time but not 100%) I'm saying it's pretty Biphobic, bigoted, etc to turn someone down JUST for being Bi, you obviously only have a problem with Bi people being Bi.

And also yes we do get hurt because duh its Biphobia but we also are ultimately glad to know because we wouldn't want to sleep with Biphobic people anyway we just want y'all to acknowledge it for what it is, a bigoted prejudice, no not a boundary but a Biphobic preference. I know a lot won't get that and scream "it's a boundary, it's a boundary!" and I don't know if they do this to Bi woman who say it but if this was about Trans woman they would also add "you just want to rape, coerce, harass Lesbians into sleeping with you" & usually paired with plenty of misgendering. I feel like I have seen it but only more so in terms of gold star lesbian rhetoric instead of terf rhetoric.

Either way, it just kind of sad, frustrating and annoying that Bi+, trans, etc can't DARE to bring this stuff up without being called Lesbophobic (just using this term would get me harassed & called a bigot on Twitter because it "contains a slur") because we SHOULD be allowed to bring up stuff that hurts us but we can't because LGBTQIA people seem to have this unspoken hierarchy of who gets cared about, believed, listened to first and it's definitely seems based on the order of the letters in the alphabet soup.

But anyway yeah, I have a hard time taking the post I shared an image of above seriously when stuff like I wrote above is going on. Yes I do think being critical of fandom in terms of bigotry is important, ESPECIALLY racism because that honestly is one of the BIGGEST problems since fandom is dominated mostly by white people (specifically women & queer people) however... I don't think the above is a decent example of that, it condenses the issues and leaves out so much needed nuance and such (yes this is cropped so it doesn't include some of the other additions to it but tbf from what I remember it didn't really add nuance, just clarifyed what the first post was doing).

For example, a Bi person headcanoning a character Bi a majority of the time should not be considered Biphobic, even if the character is a negative stereotype PLENTY of people do this as a way to reclaim the character from the bigotry that was written with it. Or the above, if someone hc's a character who is a badass as Bi there shouldn't be an issue. Now if a Bi person hc's others like the above there MIGHT be an issue then. Also, not to mention that identities intersect, if a pan ace person want to hc certain characters a certain way that could be stereotypical should we label them xphobic regardless of their identify?

I just think the original post it too vague and paints all fandom hc the same regardless of who is making them and like I said before, while this can be a problem I have more of an issue with this new trend of shutting down others hc because others claim the character even though the characters specific id is never said & thus should be open to anyone (example: Lesbians claiming its bigoted or get upset at others for hc a character as Bi that they hc as Lesbian even though the character was originally written straight or is very heavily straight coded and/or had relationships with men). Also fandoms erasing characters identities that are outright stated or implied is ALSO a huge thing I find to be more of a problem then the above post (examples: Luz Noceda from Owl house is stated by the creator as being Bi but people are calling her/them (her & her girlfriend) lesbians; another one that I feel is SORT of a problem but I also can't 100% condemn people who do this because the show doesn't help with continuing to be vague about it is Bob Belcher & him being hinted at being Bi but is erased by straight and gay(LG) fans as being straight).

Also I don't apologize for all of my examples being about Bi people, biphobia, etc because I am Bi so that is what I know and experience first and foremost!

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la5t-res0rt · 4 years

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fun fact fucko no one cares that he’s trans, gnc, or autistic. all they care about is that he said someone wasn’t bisexual all because they hate them. thats fucked up no matter who you are. being austistic isn’t an excuse to be an utter dick hole.

alrighty folks strap in because we are in for a long one today

to start off i will begin by saying that i care about the identities of people i like and call friends i care enough to listen and learn from them because they have different perspectives on issues that i as a person who is none of the things that this person is will ever understand

it is important to listen to people and learn from them not just shine a light out of your ass for someone out of a weird place of blind worship thats honestly so cringey but that isnt what this is about this about you and likely others harassing ad sending death threats my friend and comrade betel bitches

i will now be going under a readmore to spare the dashboard

so lets recap what exactly is he being harassed for

as you all are no doubt aware there is a blog called nether receipts where a certain user we shall not name catalogs instances where members of the beetlejuice fandom are harassed correction its a blog where this person catalogs instances where flaws in their character as well as the characters of the people around her are highlighted and critiqued with the occaisional off color remark and threat which i obviously do not approve of who would

anyway following reading some ill-informed and not-so-well-phrased comments from a certain narcissistic user about their sexuality my friend had this to say

this was the post that got them put on this receipts blog which really exists as a source of people for a certain cluster of the beetlebabe fandom to harass and try to drag or cancel

this is the post that has made people call him biphobic and here is why thats wrong and stupid

you said in your ask that he only is saying that this icky person is not bisexual because there is malice between them and while yes its true that there is malice orion never once said that this person wasnt bisexual

i took the liberty of sifting through the harassment asks he received yesterday because you all love receipts so much i took the liberty of grabbing a few and adding some highlights so you dont miss the important bits

orion never once said this person isnt bisexual he stated that equating doing femme on femme pornography to bisexuality is a biphobic statement and is in fact a problematic thing to say

there may be crossover between bisexual people and people who do femme on femme but they are far from the same thing doing pornography is a choice you actively make and you do it for compensation however being bisexual is simply part of who you are it is something you dont choose

although this person would perhaps disagree

and before you come for me this person posted these for the world to see and obviously i have as many receipts as my drive can carry furthermore how does this argument make sense why would you care so much about heterophobia if youre not heterosexual why are you so pressed oh wait is it perhaps

because this person is using the split attraction model for woke points like this screams that this person sees women as sex objects or perhaps this person is comphet and is denying themselves because heteronormativity is so deeply ingrained in their being that they wish to cling to heterosexuality to keep up their squeaky clean white feminist woman persona or maybe theyre just not well informed on lgbt+ issues

editors note the editor is an ace person who considers using the split attraction model is situations like this isnt exactly helpful like i cant stop you from doing it but you shouldnt have to say im a bisexual heteromantic person you can just be a bisexual woman and keep dating men you dating men doesnt erase your bisexuality saying that you would have sex with a woman but not romantically be involved with them makes the editor think woman = sex object and as a feminist the editor has to say thats fucked up

i will reiterate implying that doing pronography of any kind is equitable to a human sexualty is harmful to bisexual people and if youre like uhhh im bi and i think its okay guess what you do not speak for every single bi person so you should try harder to be compassionate for other peoples level of comfort

in any case statements like these are hurtful to bi people equating voluntary sex work to a sexuality isnt okay and its something that person should maybe address and consider apologizing for but since this person only listens to people in their inner circle and they dont even really listen to them its unlikely that this person will ever make amends for past biphobic tendencies because as everyone has been so quick to point out being bi doesnt excuse biphobia or homophobia or anything of the sort editors note heterophobia is not a legitimate issue im sorry if you feel oppressed for your straightness but really thats a you issue

here is one more screenshot where my friend basically covers what i have just said as well as reminding the world that the owner of nether receipts is a narcissist

being a bisexual person does not excuse you from saying biphobic things and there is literally no identifier you can use for yourself that exempts you from criticism for your actions and it doesnt mean that people cant demand that you address the wrongs youve done or said

you dont have to listen you dont have to do anything but dont be surprised if you say something shitty to a group of people and they get mad at you

also all that being said what orion said was not biphobic if anything he is raephobic but lets be honest who isnt ok there thats my one funny haha for you

we have every right to criticize someone who creates simulated cp and shares it with minors in 18+ servers or someone who equated bisexuality to voluntary sex work or someone who accuses people who disagree with them of being fascists or nazis or someone who goes out of their way to repost and edit art in a mocking manner or someone who actively claims to own a fandom like these are all critique worthy behaviors that all come from the same person who never explains their actions never holds themselves accountable for the shit they cause like we as people who share the same space as this person have every write to call bull roar when we see it

it is no secret that i dislike his person and it is also no secret that i will not hesitate to the the opportunity to drag them for being a shitty person whenever the opportunity arises and since their most recent beef with me was about how i was a bad friend i guess i figured this would be a good time to come forward for one of my friends who received dozens of harassment messages and several death threats over his commentary on the actions of this one vile individual

and i am addressing them now if they ever end up reading this or when it is inevitably sent to this person

if youve got a problem with the way he and i or other antis critique you maybe come out from behind your wall of dipshit cronies and talk to us your damn self i am very sick of having to deal with nasti or morgan or that one minor or suz or that person that runs the rp blog or any of the others in your little hoard im tired of them trying to be slick like we see you we see all of you

all of your simulated cp aside youve said some really shitty things that you could easily amend since youve likely learned more about what it means to be lgbt+ since it is now a community you see yourself being a part of

part of being human is learning from your past and making a better version of yourself for tomorrow and although i think you are a really awful person i dont think youre above self betterment and self reflection and self awareness

also you dont seem to care at all when threats are being tossed around by your buddies but no matter how much me or orion or any of the others dislike what you do no person in their right mind would be okay with sending death threats and you shouldnt either you should at the very least extend that courtesy

anyway

fuck you asker youre full of trash garbage and i hope you have a not so good day like i hope it rains or something invalidate my friends identity and ill yell at clouds

#discourse #harassment #sexuality discourse

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hellomynameisbisexual · 4 years

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5 Ways That Bi Erasure Hurts More Than Just Bisexual People

December 2, 2014 by Milo Todd

This year, Bisexual Awareness Day/Celebrate Bisexuality Day was on September 23rd.

That same day, the National LGBTQ Task Force thought it’d be a good idea to post an article entitled “Bye Bye Bi, Hello Queer,” in which leadership programs director Evangeline Weiss said “she is ready ‘to say bye bye to the word bisexuality.’

She said it does not describe her sexual orientation, and she encouraged readers to cease using the word as well as she felt it reinforced a binary concept of gender.

Let me drive that home a little more. The National LGBTQ Task Force not only thought it would be a good idea to publish an article insulting, misrepresenting, and forsaking the bisexual letter in their own name, but did so on Celebrate Bisexuality Day.

Rude.

And a fantastic example of the constant, ongoing erasure bisexual people have to deal with. This one just happened to be incredibly blatant.

What happened as a result of that article? People got pissed.

People got so pissed that the Task Force not only removed the article from their website, but posted in its place this non-apology (it keeps being referred to as an apology, but I’m not so easily pleased): “Having listened to a wide array of feedback on the timing and content, we recognize that this blog offended people. For this we sincerely apologize. It has been removed.”

In other words, “Sorry you got pissed off. Hopefully you’ll shut up if we take it down.” Which, as far as I can tell, isn’t much of an apology for a blatant disregard of an entire community of people.

Misunderstanding of the bisexual community has been the crux of biphobia’s history and the ongoing battle to erase bisexuality from the LGBTQIA+ community.

It’s a scary time to be bi, especially when your lesbian, gay, pansexual, and queer siblings and allies are calling for your blood simply because they’ve fallen victim to the mainstream agenda without realizing it. (Say what?! Jump to #5.)

It’s time for a change.

It’s time for all of us to properly understand one another and to — hope of hopes — become allies for our incredibly similar endeavors. To help initiate that friendship, I ask you, dear reader, to go through the following three steps.

Step 1: Look below. If I’ve played my cards right, virtually every reader should find at least one category with which they identify.

Step 2: Approach your designated section(s) with an open mind, an unprejudiced heart, and a desire to further enhance your own community/ies. It’s difficult for people to learn new things and see different views if they automatically approach them with resistance, which is often the case with bisexual topics.

Step 3: See how bi erasure hurts you as a person and, while you’re at it, likely hurts the people you care about. Because it really is happening.

So here are five ways in which bi erasure is hurting people of layered identities.

1. Female-Identified People and Feminists

Bisexuality is one of the only non-monosexual* identities currently recognized in the English-speaking world. If bisexuality is kept underground, it suppresses our limited, precious resources for open discussion about non-monosexuality. This hurts female-identified people and feminists regardless of their sexual orientation.

To this day, female-identified people can’t get a fair shake. Pay is unequal, birth control access is limited, and objectification is a daily thing. Non-monosexual women in particular are often not taken seriously because they’re seen as sluts, greedy, or unable to make up their minds.

Also, the general fetishizing of women is particularly intensified in the bisexual realm by (straight-identified) men, turning the very act of women’s sexual freedom, empowerment, and self-expression into nothing more than something for male gazes. (This is most often seen through the relentless prompts for female-female-male threesomes and masculine catcalls in bars when two femme-appearing women make out.)

By participating in or casually allowing bi erasure to happen, we’re ignoring the specific plights and abuses of bisexual women, thereby contributing to the ongoing problem of female inequality, objectification, and silence.

As feminists, we can’t pick and choose which women to fight for. The complexities of womanhood — and all of its cultural suppressions — are an all-or-none deal.

*Note: Non-monosexuality usually refers to someone who is interested in more than one sex or gender. (In other words, somebody who isn’t gay, lesbian, or straight.) Another way to say “non-monosexuality” would be “polysexuality” to help keep it from sounding negative.

2. Male-Identified People and Male Liberationists*

Just like with female-identified people and feminists, bi erasure hurts male-identified people and male liberationists regardless of their sexual orientation.

Allow me to make this pretty basic: Men continue to be fed the message that being gay is bad. Being gay means you’re not really a man, which means you lose your dude membership and the bulk of your male privilege. And since gayness equals the slightest shred of attraction to or intimacy with another male, all manners of bromance must be squashed.

In short, many guys live in a state of silent terror in this regard.

Bi men are afraid of being banished from the world of lady-loving, gay men are worried about losing all of their connections to hetero land, and nothing is worse for a straight man than being called a fag.

Constant monitoring, constant filtering, constant stress: Is this really the kind of world we guys want to keep living in?

By being able to talk about bisexuality — remember: one of our only non-monosexual identities — male-identified people can begin to break free from the masculine ideal.

Bi talk helps bridge the gap between being a man (straight) and not being a man (gay) and realizing, hey, having some manner of attraction to or intimate interaction with another guy is totally okay, masculinity unscathed.

Gay men can begin to regain their identities as men, bi men can finally start coming out, and “fag” will lose its strength as an insult from one straight man to another.

*Note: Male liberationists are more or less seen as allies to feminists and vice versa. Both will argue that patriarchy is bad, but while feminists talk of how it’s bad for females, male liberationists talk of how it’s bad for males. Examples include the inability to romantically or sexually love another male, the emasculation of men of color, and the physical, verbal, and mental abuse that comes from society’s expectations to be stereotypically masculine.

3. People Who Identify as Trans Sexual, Trans Gender, Genderfluid, Genderqueer, or Gender Non-Conforming

This one’s pretty easy. Some people on the trans spectrum identify as bisexual. But then they’re told they can’t or that it’s an insult to their trans siblings because bisexuality is believed to be trans-exclusive.

The problem with bi erasure is it adds to the ongoing problem of cis people — LGQ or not — telling trans people what to think. Cis people have a bad habit of thinking they need to speak for people on the trans spectrum even when trans people are quite capable of speaking for themselves. This is even more frustrating when it comes from a community supposedly meant to support them.

Despite the personhood for which they’re continuing to fight, trans people can receive backlash from the lesbian, gay, and queer communities as their identities and bodies are turned into political battlegrounds.

Sometimes, they’re used without consent by some cis individuals so that points can be made for non-trans-specific agendas, and sometimes they’re ironically used in the attempts for cis identities to help better the trans worlds.

For instance, automatically dismissing bisexuality as trans-exclusive and guilting any person on the trans spectrum that wants to identity as bisexual, if I may make so fine a point.

As blogger Aud Traher writes, “If you want to support trans people like me, don’t erase me or speak over me or cause me harm out of self-righteous biphobia. Look into yourself and deal with that internalized biphobia and then help others get over theirs. Don’t advocate for the destruction of a community in the name of ‘saving’ it. And, especially, don’t do it in my name.”

4. People Who Identify as Gay, Lesbian, or — Yes — Straight

Quite simply, it makes gays and lesbians (and straight people) look bad, too.

Bisexual people get a bad rap for apparently upholding the gender binary by saying they love only (cis) men or (cis) women, but isn’t that pretty much exactly what gays, lesbians, and straight people are saying when they identify as gay, lesbian, or straight? That they’ll only love either (cis) men or (cis) women?

But where’s their rampant backlash from the rest of the community for upholding the gender binary? I’m just sayin’.

Even when these groups extend their definitions to include trans people and people on the gender non-conforming spectrum, it’s often still as long as those trans people exhibit some manner of gender representation that falls into the lover’s category of desire.

Now, I’m honestly not trying to rag on gays, lesbians, or even straight people. They have as much right to identify how they want as anybody else. And there’s nothing wrong with feeling primarily attracted to only, say, cis or trans men if your brain simply tells you that you only like guys. That’s fine. Go ahead and do that. I’m not saying you can’t.

What I am saying is you can’t be spewing bi hate or letting bi erasure slide because 1) it’s incredibly one-sided and unfair, and 2) in the end, it’s making you look bad, too.

What do you think will happen if bi erasure is a success? You’ll be next, dears.

*cue Jaws theme*

5. People Who Identify as Queer, Pansexual, or Another Fellow Non-Monosexual

In late October, Lizzy the Lezzy — who I quite enjoy, by the way — shared a photo on her Facebook timeline explaining sexuality in terms of guests at a BBQ.

This would be all well and good if it didn’t include a glaring misconception about bisexual people, especially when compared to pansexuals. While bisexual people were defined as getting both hot dogs and hamburgers, pansexuals were defined as getting hot dogs, hamburgers, “and a salad.” Oops. What year is this again?

I’m going to make something very plain to you, dear reader: Bisexual people don’t just love (cis) men or (cis) women. That’s not how the ballpark definition goes. The “bi” in “bisexual” does not indicate a binary. Well, okay, it does indicate a binary, but probably not the one you think.

Instead of “bi” meaning a love for only cis men or cis women or otherwise putting men and women at two opposite ends of a spectrum, “bi” means a love for identities bisexual people identify with themselves and identities that they don’t.

Or, as the popular Robyn Ochs definition goes: “I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge that I have in myself the potential to be attracted – romantically and/or sexually – to people of more than one sex and/or gender, not necessarily at the same time, not necessarily in the same way, and not necessarily to the same degree.”

Look at that very closely. That’s still a binary. That’s still “bi.” And there isn’t a thing wrong with it, no exclusion to be seen.

When compared with the general concepts of pansexuals and queers, our orientations suddenly sound pretty darn similar: We love everyone.

Bisexual people get a bad rap for apparently being transphobic. While we’ve already seen a little bit in #3 as to why we aren’t, I want to further drive the point home here. A large portion of the transphobic accusations toward us come from the queer and pansexual communities, which in turn seem to derive from some serious misinformation and misdirection by the mainstream.

For the record, queers and pansexuals are cool. I like them. But the fact of the matter is that the misconception of the “bi” in “bisexual” as meaning an attraction to only (cis) men or (cis) women — and therefore upholding the gender binary — was created and imposed upon bisexual people by the mainstream. You know, the people that want the gender binary to stick around.

And some queers and pansexuals ate the propaganda they were fed? That’s terrifying. It starts to show just how large and sneaky the mainstream’s gender binary monster truly is.

By defining and erasing bisexuality on the grounds that it upholds the gender binary, pansexuals and queers are not only reinforcing the binary they so sorely wish to dismantle, but they are losing important focus on where the problem actually resides: the mainstream’s insistence to force the gender binary on non-mainstream groups such as bisexual people.

Further, holding bisexual people responsible for the abuse they’ve suffered is simply wrong. All that’s doing is blaming the victim. But, by recognizing and respecting bisexual people as they truly are, bisexual people can not only help dismantle the gender binary and put a new definition on the concept of the spectrum, but finally be allowed to team up with pansexuals and queers to crush mainstream abuse on non-mainstream identities.

Doesn’t that sound nice? I think it sounds nice.

TL;DR

Dear non-bisexual identities, please stop shooting yourselves in the foot and then wondering why you’re missing toes.

We’re here for the same reasons you are: for the right to love whoever we want and for the right for others to do the same.

So let’s finally be friends. We’re never going to get anything done if we keep spending our time putting each other down.

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